Champagne At Joanne's

Summary

Podcast Summary: My Therapist Ghosted Me – "Champagne At Joanne's"

Hosts: Vogue Williams & Joanne McNally
Date: June 5, 2026
Setting: Joanne's new house over champagne

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Episode Overview

"Champagne At Joanne's" is an episode bursting with the signature witticisms, hilarious tangents, and honest chats that fans expect from Vogue and Joanne. This week, the duo broadcast from Joanne’s newly moved-in house, christening her home with laughter, impromptu gift exchanges, discussions ranging from buying paddling pools to the perils of over-optimization, dealing with pregnancy symptoms, and the art of navigating fame and privacy. Listeners are taken on a fast-paced, irreverent journey, touching on pop culture, personal updates, and a lively critique of “wellness” culture.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Housewarming Chaos and Gift-Giving

[04:00]–[10:00]

• The episode opens with the pair excitedly recording at Joanne’s house, reminiscing about school “non-uniform days” and local customs.
• Joanne receives a neon salt and pepper mill set from Vogue – “I was at the Chelsea Flower Show and I saw those and I was like, ‘Who is gonna buy them?’ And then I thought, ‘I am. For Joanne.’” (C, 09:50)
• The joy of personal (and sometimes slightly useless) gifts, and the art of re-gifting.
• Conversation about moving, furnishing, and needing bigger spaces – “It was made for you. Because all her furniture that never fit in the flat fits perfectly here.” (C, 04:34)

2. Champagne Toasts and Pregnancy Myths

[05:00]–[07:00]

• The hosts discuss traditions about house blessings and superstitions, prompting Vogue to sip a little champagne “Because it’s bad luck not to toast a house.” (C, 05:09)
• Pregnancy quirks come up: “I got so much... That’s all you can have. Or the baby will have a tiny head.” (B, 05:27)
• Perimenopause confusion and TV storylines involving surprise pregnancies (“Mandaland” anecdote).

3. Ridiculous Domestic Anecdotes

[10:40]–[14:45]

• Joanne details acquiring (and accidentally slicing open) a heart-shaped paddling pool:
  • “I threw the box cutter through the box to open the paddling pool. And didn’t I slice the padding pool?... like Jeffrey Dahmer.” (B, 14:13)
• The duo discuss urban wildlife, cleaning disasters (“I had to hoover the driveway yesterday…”), and comical homecare misadventures.
• Joanne’s box-cutter obsession: “I did my whole bikini line with it. It’s so sharp. I can’t take it out of my hand… I’m like Edward Scissorhands.” (B, 13:59)

4. Critiquing the “Wellness” and Optimization Craze

[15:00]–[23:39]

• The conversation pivots to the “manosphere” and the podcasts that young men consume. Vogue relays overhearing questionable podcast content in a taxi: “I was like, what the hell is it? And then I was like, manosphere vibes.” (C, 15:19)
• Joanne launches into a higher-level take-down of Stephen Bartlett’s attitudes towards alcohol and optimization:
  • “He had three… he doesn’t drink. He gave up drink at 30. He’s now 33... He said he drank three glasses of wine and it ruined him for a week.” (B, 16:50)
  • Memorable Quote: “I drank three glasses of wine and it ruined my life… I was like, oh my God, ruined your life? You got pissed, sold an organ, hired a prostitute… Like, what happened?” (B, 17:08)
• Both hosts lampoon Bartlett’s reliance on wellness apps and trackers (Whoop, Oura), suggesting optimization is joyless:
  • “There’s a level of looking after your health, and then there is living off those boxes… it’s a sucker of joy of your life to be living off those boxes.” (C, 20:29)

5. The Balance between Living and Optimizing

[23:40]–[24:45]

• Joanne: “He’s a crack vac. One of these people who walks into a room, he just sucks the crack out. He vacuum packs crack out of rooms.” (B, 23:39)
• Vogue: “Stephen Bartlett, if you’re listening… go out, get up, get pegged… lose your way or don’t get pegged.” (B/C, 24:04)
• Spontaneous riffing on “pegging” and authentic living – a classic, irreverent MTGM detour.

6. Pregnancy, Puffiness, and Body Honesty

[24:50]–[26:50]

• Vogue and Joanne openly discuss pregnancy body changes:
  • “I have a puffy vagina in pregnancy. I think it’s an important thing that women know... It’s an important thing to know because it will just end up there.” (C, 25:00)
• Emphasis on destigmatizing real conversations about women’s health – with both hosts supporting honesty around changes and experiences.

7. Public Drunkenness, Party Antics, and Stories

[26:47]–[28:30]

• Hilarious recounting of drunken exploits, both personal and from the news:
  • “Drunk man performed CPR on rubber dinghy after mistaking it for a dying person. Classic. Love him.” (B, 26:47)
  • “Intoxicated passenger tries to pay taxi fare with a live hamster. Now you’re talking.” (B, 27:23)
• Reflection on the role of alcohol in social confidence and first sexual experiences:
  • “You’re preaching to incels. They need to be pissed for the first one… A sober ride from an incel – no wonder no one is riding them. Is that terrible?” (B, 22:14)

8. Celebrity Encounters and Autograph Economics

[28:38]–[34:41]

• Hot take on Russell Crowe’s approach to autograph seekers:
  • “He told them all he is going to go to them – he just doesn’t want a load of people swarming on top of him… At least he can now, like, have a system.” (C, 29:25)
• Buying, selling, and the limited real-world value of celebrity autographs:
  • Memorable Quote: “I don’t know who you think you’re selling mine to… No one’s gonna want three of my autographs.” (C, 29:45)
• Much laughter about their own (modest) eBay value:
  • “Vogue Williams signed photo… 39.99 or best offer!” (D, 32:44; C, 32:54)

9. Great Comebacks: Pop Culture Rundown

[34:46]–[39:22]

• The hosts discuss Robert Downey Jr’s and Susan Boyle’s public career revitalizations.
• Joanne is delighted by Susan Boyle’s summer comeback — a remix of the Cornetto theme:
  • “She’s making the Karen Bob work… She’s released a remix of the Cornetto tune. It’s a banger.” (B, 37:32)
  • “Now she’ll actually be back… Come in every five years, drop a banger for Cornetto, Solero, Magnum…” (B, 39:08)

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Notable Quotes

• “He’s a crack vac. One of these people who walks into a room, he just sucks the crack out. He vacuum packs crack out of rooms.” — Joanne (23:39)
• “If everyone went around two drinks in and they were all kept at that level, there’d be no war. Everyone would be getting on.” — Vogue (17:42)
• “A sober ride from an incel – no wonder no one is riding them. Is that terrible?” — Joanne (22:14)
• “She’s making the Karen Bob work… She’s released a remix of the Cornetto tune. It’s a banger.” — Joanne (37:32)
• “I have a puffy vagina in pregnancy. I think it’s an important thing that women know.” — Vogue (25:00)
• “You’re just such a melt… Stephen Bartlett, if you’re listening… go out, get up, get pegged. Lose your way.” — Joanne (23:39, 24:04)

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Key Timestamps

• 04:00 – Arriving at Joanne’s house, gift exchange, Mufti Day chat
• 09:50 – Neon salt & pepper gift, discussion of gift-giving habits
• 14:13 – The tragedy (and comedy) of slicing the paddling pool
• 15:19 – “Manosphere vibes” in podcasts overheard in taxis
• 16:50–18:00 – Stephen Bartlett's wellness/optimization “scandal” deconstructed
• 20:29 – The joyless side of optimization culture
• 23:39 – “Crack vac” quote and ridicule of the over-optimized lifestyle
• 24:50–26:50 – Open chat about pregnancy, puffiness, and partners’ comments
• 26:47–28:30 – Funny drunken stories; critique of “sober rides” for incels
• 29:25–29:45 – Russell Crowe autograph drama; reflections on autograph economics
• 32:44–33:35 – Surreal eBay pricing of signed photos
• 34:46–39:22 – Robert Downey Jr & Susan Boyle discussed as examples of comebacks; Susan’s Cornetto campaign

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Tone & Vibe

Gleefully irreverent, fast-talking, peppered with bursts of authenticity and sharp wit. Vogue and Joanne create a space where everyday absurdities and big cultural trends both get the same playful, honest treatment.

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For Listeners: Why You’ll Love It

If you missed this episode, expect cackling, unexpectedly touching honesty, and hilarious takes on modern life — from dysfunctional house moves to the perils of social optimization, to what really matters in life (hint: it’s not always tracked by your Whoop).

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This summary captures the highlights, raucous energy, and genuine moments that define "Champagne At Joanne's."

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

This is a global player original podcast. Are you gonna talk about Stephen Bartlett?

[C]

Yes. I'd be good at it. Imagine me, Peg.

[B]

You'd be brilliant.

[C]

I would be good at it. Yeah, I know I would. I already know.

[B]

Yeah, you wouldn't even need the strap on. He just. He boils my blood.

[C]

Christ, I hope you never bump into him.

[B]

Maybe I fancy.

[C]

Say hello and welcome.

[B]

Are we on? Are we up? We're up.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Are we up? Yeah.

[C]

So.

[B]

So this is where. This is like the. You know when you had. When you're in school, you'd have the non uniform days.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And it felt like just chaos.

[C]

They call it Mufti day over here.

[B]

What?

[C]

Yeah, Mufti day. My kids have it on Friday.

[B]

That's not true, Joe.

[C]

Isn't it called a mufty day over here?

[B]

Mufty day.

[C]

They don't think about muff the way we do.

[B]

Mofty day.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Where doesn't even make any sense.

[C]

They call knickknacks. What do you call them again? Ring ring Ginger or something.

[D]

Oh, as in knocking on people's doors right away? That, that varies.

[B]

Ring ring Ginger.

[C]

Knock knock Ginger.

[D]

But where we're from, call it Ratties.

[C]

Ratties. Oh my God, can you imagine you're being dragged up jo Ratties on your new road. Why do we get a few drinks?

[B]

No, you know what, you know what blows my mind? I was actually speaking about some. I was doing research for this other thing the other day and I was talking about the fact that I used to knock around to the neighbor's house and when they'd open I just start singing and dancing.

[C]

Oh yeah, I used to do. But I'd have a box for charity.

[B]

Oh, I don't know. Charity box.

[C]

I'd be like, charity get signed

[B]

seven years of age. But like I have to say, if a child knocked on my door now and started singing and dancing, I don't know, I guess I'd have to listen to you.

[C]

You'd feel like you're gonn in trouble for it.

[B]

That if you don't like the generosity of the neighbors that they actually put up with that some of them would invite me in and let me do it in the sitting room.

[C]

You see, you just couldn't get away with that name.

[B]

I'm like, you've got to pick a pocket door too. I think I was playing the spoons at one point.

[C]

Oh, my God. Gina at Mary Black. I'm gonna get her. Magnificent. She played all her bangers and she really. She left me hanging because at the end she went off and she said goodbye. Then she came back on and she did one song and I was like, oh, my God, she's not doing my favorite song.

[B]

She edged you.

[C]

I was like. I honestly was like, where's Past the Point of Rescue? How could she not do that song?

[B]

I'm not as familiar with her work.

[C]

Oh, it's a glorious song. It's an absolute banger. Sent us all out in a high. And it was the last song she played.

[B]

Oh, she. Oh, she teased you.

[C]

And then came she teased me. She teased me. But Spenny and I are having a wedding anniversary when it's our 10 year wedding anniversary in our new house. And I was like, maybe I'll get Mary Black. I know she's retired.

[B]

Well, you smack the mumba for divorce yet.

[C]

I'd love Mary Black for the, for the wedding anniversary.

[B]

Would you actually, would you book her?

[C]

I would love her. She might not want to do it though. She didn't really want to do the 40th.

[B]

Yeah. She said no before. There's. There's previous there.

[C]

I don't really.

[B]

Here's Vog offering me another 300 quid to sing in her garden.

[C]

300 quid?

[D]

I wish.

[B]

I know. Yeah.

[C]

I forget why I brought up Mary Black. Because this is what we do. Joe. Why did I bring up Mary Black?

[B]

I was talking about. Oh, we went from Mufti Day or whatever it's called. I was saying, we are in my house. We are recording in my house. That's where it started.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

How you got to marry Black, I don't know.

[C]

We're gonna keep an eye on this listeners. Okay. That was our first fault.

[B]

We are in my house. Joe suggested we film in a house and we were like, oh my God, this is so much better. And then I was like, I could get Joe to help me. There's a couple of boxes and I need a mirror board upstairs.

[D]

That's why we're here.

[C]

Yeah, I can't lift. I'm pregnant.

[B]

I'm not even joking. Oh, And. And you hadn't seen the house.

[C]

The house is fantastic.

[B]

I love showing off.

[C]

Yeah. But I said to Johan, I was like. It's like it was. It was made for you. Because all her furniture that never fit in the flat fits perfectly here.

[B]

Everything suddenly makes sense.

[C]

This, like how this sofa was in your flat. I don't understand.

[B]

I know. Well, yeah, I know. Yeah, I know. I find I finally found a place to fit the furniture anyway. Because we're in the house.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I want to celebrate.

[C]

And by celebrate, she means have a bottle of champagne.

[B]

I don't know how else to celebrate. That's all I know.

[C]

Well, it is. It's actually. I think it's like. It's bad luck. I have to have a sip, by the way, listeners. And you're allowed to have a sip because it's bad luck not to toast a house.

[B]

Well, Bonnie Blue, apparently it's who from the shots into her. And she's pregnant. Although I think that's a prayer. I think I am assuming that's a press stunt. She is. She is pregnant.

[C]

I. Well, she. She had a pregnant. Fake pregnancy to me. Congratulations to Joanne.

[B]

Myself, who's.

[C]

There you go. You got so much.

[B]

A little bit of wine glasses. You got me.

[C]

I know.

[B]

That's all you can have. Or the baby will have a tiny head.

[C]

Just.

[B]

Joe, are you pregnant with child?

[C]

Is your period period? You can have a full glass.

[B]

Are you on the coil? You can have a full glass.

[C]

I know somebody who was 48 and basically. I know. I know someone who's 48 and basically thought she was going through perimenopause. I went and did blood tests on her pregnant.

[B]

Well. And spoiler alert, if you're watching a Mandaland series too. Spoiler, spoiler.

[C]

I haven't watched it. Not all of it. No. Oh, yeah. Going all.

[B]

You think she's going through the Perry. She's going through the menopause. And she goes in. It's one of the funniest scenes in Amanda, I have to say. Seriously, it's really funny. She's like, I've hot flushes, foggy brain, blah, blah, blah. And she's like, is it the menopause? And the doctor said, and you're pregnant and she faints. It's what. It's. You know, I love a bit of physical comedy.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

It's up there with Mr. Blobby.

[C]

I just. I love Anne.

[B]

One of the funniest storylines in series two is Joanna Lumley, who plays Amanda's mother.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And I mean, My God, it's.

[C]

Pour the champagne. This is not life.

[B]

One of the storylines is that she can't. That she's a really terrible driver. And the. The visuals of her driving around London in a Mini Cooper, banging into things, and she's trying to get Amanda to take her points for her and all. It's so funny. Spoiler. Spoiler. Sorry, Judge, one question.

[D]

Yes, please.

[C]

This is great. Let's come to Joanne's house more often.

[B]

I'm gonna get a landscaper. And I've started measuring the. I'm measuring for a bed. I'm going to measure this time.

[C]

Do you want me to measure for you? Because I just feel like you're okay.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Do you want your present?

[B]

Yes. I'm gonna get the right Christmas.

[C]

I'm gonna get the rest of the present because I know. I know you're not gonna have what you need for the present.

[B]

Is it willpower?

[C]

What do we need? You'll understand. Now you. They'll just sit there as ornaments.

[B]

Oh, my God. I love it.

[C]

I was like, for the audio listener.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[C]

Open the other one.

[B]

There's another one.

[C]

It is a neon. Salt and pepper mills.

[B]

Shut up.

[C]

I know.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[C]

It's very you, isn't it?

[B]

I love them.

[C]

And I'll get the rest because I know you're never gonna go and buy salt or peppers to put in it.

[B]

Do you have to get special salt and pepper?

[C]

No, you just have to buy some. And you just.

[B]

I have a bag of mold downstairs.

[C]

Do you? No, but they have to be like. It has to be salt that you need to grind down.

[B]

That's an exceptional present, Joe. I'm ready for you.

[C]

I saw them.

[B]

Can I have your present soon?

[D]

Really soon. I didn't know I was coming today. In fairness, you did rearrange it yesterday until yesterday evening. I didn't.

[C]

Everyone has a candle knocking around the

[D]

house, and I've got your presence in the storage.

[B]

Speaking of candles, well, I think I owe you a Christmas one from 2018. So we're fine.

[D]

Let's call it quits.

[B]

It's called a quits. Speaking of candles, a friend of mine, Noel, sent me a. Again. I actually feel so bad. When people move in, I start sending cards. I've had so many nice cards, I'm like, I'm not doing that.

[C]

Who's sending you cards?

[B]

Well, like, my mom and stuff.

[C]

Yeah, I was thinking only people over the age of 70.

[B]

Well, my friend Noel came over. She dropped a card and a. On a. What was it's? A low way. What's that brand? One of those. And it was a candle. And I opened it and it was burnt. It was burned down to the wick. And I said, Noel, this re gifting, I mean, listen, I'm a regifter at the same as you, but you can't be re gifting. You've used. There's a line, there's a bag.

[C]

Maybe you wanted you to have the packaging.

[B]

She's like, that's new. I said, noel, don't kid a kidder. And she said it was new. So I was like, oh my God, I got tuna canned. Do you remember back. Do you remember that story back? Someone thought they were buying a watch and they bought a tuna and someone had taken the watch and sent returned the box with a tin of tuna in it. It was the same weight as the watch. Do you remember this, Joe?

[D]

Was it to Amazon?

[B]

Yeah, something like that.

[C]

Well, Amazon, you can send stuff back down. Yeah, fair play. Whoever decides to send something back should really get a free product. But some people use like, no, because some people use a whole product and then send it back and they're like, this just wasn't right. Or fill it up with something else like K18. I think they had a real problem with that on Amazon where people were using the K18 and refilling it with something else and sending it back and then it wasn't real. K18.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

I know. But K18 is brilliant.

[B]

It's really weird. What it is.

[C]

I'm saying, like, you're doing an antigen.

[B]

Oh, for sake. Okay.

[C]

Anyway, I got those. I was at the Chelsea Flower show and I saw those and I was like, who is gonna buy them? And then I thought, I am. For Joanne.

[B]

They're good by those monstrosities.

[C]

Oh, they had loads of them though. They said loads of people would be into them.

[B]

I absolutely love them. And I'm going to use them both for thoughts because I don't eat pepper.

[C]

Oh, you don't eat pepper. You're fat. You're fat. You're. People guessed you have over will eat pepper.

[D]

You'd never put pepper on anything.

[B]

I'd never. I don't with pepper at all. No.

[C]

Have you ever seen spanies?

[D]

That's remarkable.

[B]

Do you eat pepper?

[D]

I think most people do, yeah.

[C]

For what? Ground pepper? Eggs? No, no, no, no, no.

[B]

You know how I like my eggs? I like them rock hard, like golf balls covered in salt.

[C]

Do you know I have to make three types of eggs every morning? Do you know that?

[B]

That's my Morning force a. When you move in across the world. Cuz I'll be up.

[C]

You can, you can either have.

[B]

You can have an egg in a cup.

[C]

You can have an egg in a cup. Scrambled eggs or an omelette. That's all you're getting. I'm not doing any more eggs.

[B]

You know I had to hoover the driveway yesterday with my Henrietta Hoover because while I was away for work. What Fox obviously got in a bag.

[C]

Oh no, I know.

[B]

There was eggshells everywhere. Blah blah blah. Anyway, I've no yard equipment because obviously I'm not a yarder.

[D]

Let's wait a few days because I hope to that was papped because the

[C]

image of you front she's really lost it now.

[B]

I was out there with the Dyson but the Dyson wasn't charged. Then I dragged it.

[C]

Dyson went out there?

[B]

Yeah, he meant I actually when I text you the message, I said you're coming over. Said I'll hear the driveway.

[C]

Sorry. Please tell me about the paddling pool.

[B]

Well, I'm actually so I was obviously building myself up towards hot girl summer because obviously it was a heat wave and I was kind of planning out the garden because you know, I have a garden age. Did I mention the garden?

[C]

And I'm glad you decided upon a gardener.

[B]

I've got a. I'm gonna get a gardener. And I ordered this stunning bright red heart shaped paddling pill. I took ages picking it out.

[C]

Where'd you get us here?

[B]

I don't know. That place that we're not supposed to go to. But I mean I had to get it from there because I needed to know when it was arriving because I was away for work.

[C]

It was like when I was thinking about, I was like, where would you get one of them? And then I was like, oh, why don't you do that? That dirty look.

[B]

Listen, what can I say?

[C]

Every now Joe hasn't even figured out what we're talking about. Have you not?

[D]

But before. Before you say what was wrong with it or why it was wrong, can I ask the next question?

[B]

Of course.

[D]

Did you measure?

[C]

No.

[B]

No joke. No. But I had a good look at it. Oh yeah, No, I looked through with my eyes up and down, up and down.

[C]

You saw how many people fit into it.

[B]

And I saw there was a woman and a dog, I think. And I went perfecto.

[C]

That's exactly the size.

[D]

I knew where you were going to put it.

[B]

And I knew where I was going to put it.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

In the garden. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or maybe just as like A foot spa in the sitting room. I don't know. There's no rules. Live on my own now. Do what I want. And anyway order it from.

[D]

I'd love to know. Do drop a comment below.

[B]

Know what she's saying they're really unethical place.

[C]

Yeah. It's not great but they do, they do have stuff like that.

[B]

They do have stuff like that. And, and the, and what's great about buying stuff you can buy another one

[C]

if you got it from Fiverr is

[B]

wasn't it was 100. It was 100 bands on. I don't know, it was 70 odd. And then they charged me for the delivery because I had to prove I got.

[C]

You don't have prime.

[B]

I don't know if I've prime. No, I don't have. I don't have prime because I don't like to shop on.

[C]

I have prime because he used mine. I mean none of us like shopping it but I, I remember I was offered a business account. They're like shut the up.

[B]

Because I was offered a business account for delivery because I wore to that so much.

[C]

Yeah. They thought I was a business.

[B]

Are you joking me?

[C]

I know, I know, I know, I know. I've since cleaned up my action.

[B]

Anyway. I was buzzing like an L fridge.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Still roasting. Ripped it out and I have a box cutter now.

[D]

Oh, great.

[B]

Because one of the lads from yeah Caroline left it here and I'm having a ball. I'm using it to put a bread. It's really sharp.

[C]

I had my fellas from Caroline though they're really nice, they're really lovely.

[B]

But one of them left their box cutter here and I am so happy with this. I've. I'm tweezing. I did my hell bikini line with is so sharp I can't take it out of my hand. I'm like Edward Scissorhands. I' just have.

[C]

God forbid you'd offer it back.

[B]

God, no. They know where it is but it's really, really good and I'm slicing through things really, really, really well now. I, I, I, the b. The potting pill came in. I'm buzzing with the excitement of the pool party and I threw throw the box cutter through the box to open the padding pill. And didn't I, didn't I slice the paddling pill? Didn't I slice and dice it back like Jeffrey Dahmer was damaged.

[C]

Well, I said who was damaged?

[B]

I said it on inst. And, and in fairness because obviously I to tell all my needs and someone did say, would you not just send it back?

[C]

Cuz. No, that's dishonest. You can't. I was joking. You can't do that.

[B]

They're the one people that you would take the piss out of.

[C]

Yeah, but it's. It goes back to the seller. So they take the piss out of the seller. Amazon never lose. Losing the race.

[B]

Fine. I don't want to upset the paddling pill community.

[C]

I did get into a taxi there the other day, right. And you know when someone's like, there was a young fella, like, young guy, kind of all right looking, but he was listening to a podcast and like, the only lines I heard in it were like, oh, and when women are ready to mate.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

I was like, what the hell is it? And then I was like, manosphere vibes. But he looked so normal.

[B]

That doesn't necessarily. When someone says the line, when women are ready to mate isn't of its own. The context. That in itself is okay. I mean. I mean, it suggests consent. He's saying ready to mate, not just saying when you're ready to ride them.

[C]

I just found it such an odd conversation. Speaking of. Yes.

[B]

Are you gonna talk about Stephen Bartlett?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Can I just say where I. You know, like, if you have a dinner part. By the way, I used to like him. He's the. What happened to him? I think.

[C]

I think he might be all right in real life. I think I've heard that he's kind of sound.

[B]

So what we're talking about is Stephen Bar. He's only over one scandal where he basically said that maybe society should intervene with incels and because incels weren't going to get the ride and that should society intervene? And everyone's like, what are you suggesting? Some sort of giant, all that jazz? And we weren't too pleased about it. And. And now he's come out with. Now and bearing in mind this annoyed me.

[C]

Let me see what he said. Well, because it's. I find stuff like this even as

[B]

I know exactly what he said.

[C]

I can quote you a wellness person, like, I enjoy looking at wellness. I enjoy getting involved in some of it, but some of it is such a load of that I absolutely cannot bear it. It's like, would you like, would you rather do, like, over wellness or enjoy your life a little bit and do a bit of wellness? Dip the Tony in each barrel.

[B]

So Stephen Bartlett said, let me get up my notes. He had three. Stephen Bartlett, she doesn't drink. He gave a drink at 30. He's now 33. I think he said it's only 33.

[C]

Is he?

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Wasn't that because he drank three glasses of wine and it ruined him for a week?

[B]

Yeah, he said I drank three glasses toxic now.

[D]

That's not good enough.

[C]

That's not what it said it in

[D]

a tone of voice.

[C]

Well, that's what he said.

[B]

Yeah, that's what he said. I drank three glasses of wine and it ruined my life now. Obviously ruined my life. I was like, oh, my God. Ruined your life. You got pissed, sold an organ, hired a prostitute, tried to pray for on Clara. Like, what happened? Like, this is obviously like high end self destruction. Read out what he said.

[C]

He said he had a drink and it ruined his life.

[B]

His life.

[C]

So he had three glasses of wine and it ruined his life because it made him not optimal for three days. First of all, he said that he wasn't able to podcast well, which I actually don't agree with because I think when you're hungover, you are on full fuego.

[B]

I have my stride at three. I. I want podcast night. Three drinks a week.

[C]

I think you're at your funniest when you're hungover. I also think you're at your best two drinks in. Yeah, that's when a human is at its best. I get people. I do. If everyone went around two drinks in and they were all kept at that level, we'd all. There would be no. There would be no war there. Everyone would be getting on.

[B]

If Putin had a little prco in the morning, he wouldn't be half as angry.

[C]

A little prac. Like maybe a little mimosa in the morning.

[B]

Nigel Farage. A little Negroni in the morning.

[C]

He wouldn't be such a melter.

[D]

They'd all live, laugh, love.

[C]

Nigel's gone overboard. I'd say Nigel's on drink five, probably. And when people get to drink five, it gets sloppy and messy and they talk. That's what's happened to Nigel.

[B]

I know, mijo. Martin has a pint of Guinness every morning for saying us. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. Well, M. Martin was saying.

[B]

Allegedly.

[C]

Whatever M. Martin was saying some March last week.

[B]

Was he?

[C]

Yeah, he was blaming the house housing crisis on it. On immigrants.

[B]

Oh, well, then there you go. Okay, so he obviously wasn't. He didn't have the point. No, no. There you go.

[C]

He'd had four points that day.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Got it, Got it. He went too far.

[C]

Yeah, he over. He was at two points and he was making sense. And then he got to four points. Then he started talking about the social. Yeah, okay. So that's what he did. So there's a thing called being an optimization person. Because Stephen Bartlett's whoop said he was at something like, I don't know, 28 recovery or something. The amount of times I've seen a 1% recovery on my whoop. And I look at it and I'm like, I know I'm dead today because I know what I did yesterday, and I know I've had two hours.

[D]

What does that mean?

[C]

A 1% recovery means, like, you're pretty much close. You are circling the hall of death.

[D]

Oh, right. Okay.

[B]

It means you're just like, you're lucky you woke up. Yeah.

[C]

It's like, I've.

[B]

Someone got the resuscitator machine.

[C]

I was like. When I used to wear the whip, that's kind of why I stopped wearing the wheel, because I was like, this is too judgmental for me.

[B]

And it is because I. Sometimes I'm like, you know what? You don't need that much intel. You just don't.

[C]

No.

[B]

You can get kind of obsessed by it. And Stephen Bartlett is an absolute. He's a. To his whoop, from what I can tell, I'd say he rides like, when

[C]

he's an early whoop investor.

[B]

Oh, oh, my God, I'm so thick.

[C]

Is he an early whoop investor?

[B]

Google Joe now.

[C]

I like the whoop. I will say I like the way and I like. I like the aura because I do like looking at the data. But what I will say it does sometimes is I wake up, stretch, feel great, look at my aura, and it's like, oh, you, you, you. You're in an hour sleep debt. And I'm like, great.

[B]

I'm so thick. He's obviously invested in whoop, and that's why he's so whoop. Tastic. Banging on about it. Yeah.

[C]

But he does go on about human connection and stuff like that. But, like, it just feels like he's only connecting to himself and not actually, like, living his life. There is a level of looking after your health, and then there is a level of just like those people that will just. I know somebody, and he's a really nice guy, but he has lived off those meal plan boxes for, like 12 years. Literally 12 years. He has these meal plan boxes. And I just think it's a sucker of joy of your life to be living off those boxes.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Eating broccoli, brown rice and chicken.

[B]

I kind of like those. I don't. So this. Do you know what I will say? Obviously, I'm very. I'm Very. I'm a positive pinot person. But I also am aware some people don't drink. They don't want to drink. They think it's. They. No, they understand that it's poisonous and suck with them. It's not about that. It's just his general vibe. He's just such. He's so dry. And that's. Again, I'm not saying you have to drink to be crack. I know you don't. I've loads of friends who don't drink and they're great crack. It's. Do you know what I think bothers me about him? He is preaching about his concerns about incel men in vaunt. You sell about men who aren't socializing. They're not meeting women.

[D]

He did invest in women.

[C]

I knew it.

[B]

I'm so thick.

[C]

Oh God. Lucky bastard though. If he got in there early. If he got in there early, it's like. It's like getting him an apple early.

[B]

Yeah, I'm gonna invest in those fluorescent salt and pepper holders. I think that's a genius idea. That's Dragon's Dan to me. Like, hello, I'll take 1% of the business.

[C]

Same level as we for sure.

[B]

But I'm like. If you're preaching. If you're concerned about the male loneliness epidemic and you're talking about men that like and suggesting, I don't know, some like whatever gang. But I think he was on right. You're. What you're also doing is keeping men even more isolated. I'm not saying drinking is the key. I'm not saying it's the code. But what I am saying is if a man is just obsessed with dumping himself in ice, not drinking, sitting in, optimizing tracking his sleep tracking is all this. You're not. What sort of. How's it. What these also. You're preaching to incels. They've never ridden anyone. They need to be pissed for the

[C]

first one you need. Yeah.

[B]

Is that not fair? A sober ride from an incel. No wonder no one's riding them. Is that terrible?

[C]

No, I don't think I'll tell you what he said. I stopped drinking at 30 years old. When I was 31, I thought I'll have a drink again because now I could really A slash B test it. I had a year of not drinking and decided to have a drink again. It ruined three days of my life. I had a. Oh, sorry.

[B]

Was he real feet?

[C]

I had a couple of glasses of water spikes. Now, in fairness, if I had a couple of glass of wine I would get drunk, but I wouldn't. It would not take three days away from my life.

[B]

Sure. Three drinks to go to the gym.

[C]

It ruined three days of my life because of the domino effect it caused. I got worse sleep that night. And then because I got worse sleep that night, I ate more poorly the next day because my dopamine system, or whatever, the corresal system was all messed up. I podcasted worse. I didn't go to the gym that day or the day after because I felt really bad. I then slept worse. And I could track all of this on my whoop that I invested in.

[B]

I am so silly.

[D]

You went off quote just for that last bit there.

[C]

I feel like, oh, he didn't say on my week. He said. He said I could track all of this on my whoop. Full stop.

[D]

Brackets.

[C]

Brackets. He has invested in whoop.

[B]

Of course.

[C]

Of course you can track it on whoop. We can all track it on whoop or our aura. It doesn't mean that we don't want to live our lives and have a little bit of fun. And as you're saying, doesn't mean you have to not. It doesn't mean you have to drink. I'm not drinking at the moment.

[B]

It's not about the drinking. It's just about. He's just so. He's just such a melt. Do you know what he is? He's a crack vac. He's one of these people who walks into a room, he just sucks the crack out. He vacuum packs crack out of rims. I don't know why it bothers me so much. I guess because I am a drinker. I don't know why. And I also know he speaks in clickbait. I know what he's doing. He knows what he's doing. I just feel. Stephen Bartlett, if you're listening, which I'm sure you are, go out, get up, get pegged. Lose, lose.

[C]

Lose your way or don't get pegged. Okay.

[B]

No, get packed.

[C]

Get packed.

[B]

I think everyone needs to get packed once in their life, and I think that that's. He just needs to let loose.

[C]

Are you talking about men just getting packed or us getting packed?

[B]

I know women who are.

[C]

Who've been packed or pegging or pegging.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I just.

[B]

Not for me. I don't think Olivia, my trainer, was over there.

[C]

Although I'd be good at it. Imagine me, Peg.

[B]

You'd be brilliant.

[C]

I would be good at it. Yeah, I know I would. I already know.

[B]

Yeah. You wouldn't even need the strap on. You just finally get to be who you really are. Your authentic self.

[C]

Not what my newly puffy vagina. Do you know what he said to me last night? I walked into the room naked, and he goes, see? Less puffy.

[B]

Sorry. Are we gonna go down the road with Spencer saying you have a puffy vagina? Because I'm here.

[C]

I have a puffy vagina in pregnancy. I've spoken about it. I think it's an important thing that women know. Izzy, did you know that you get a puffy vagina when you're pregnant? You do. It's an important thing to know because it will just end up there. And if one of my friends. One of my friends. Laura. There's loads of Lauras in the world. You want to know who she is? Tell me about it.

[B]

Maybe bleep out her name.

[C]

Yeah, tell me about it. And I was like, what? And she goes, yeah, wait, you see, when I was pregnant with Theodore, and I was like, that's not gonna happen to me. And then I was like, oh, my God. Where are the larger knickers?

[B]

Well, I will say, in defense of the puffed vagina.

[C]

Women are getting.

[B]

Women are puffing. They're paying to get their vaginas puffed.

[C]

But he wasn't even trying to be mean, because I had said to him, I was like, oh, my God, it's different. Like. And he was like, well, it is a little. It is a little puffier. It's a bit puffier. And then yesterday, he was like, it's less puffy today. And I was like, I think it's because the day that I showed it to you, I had done a whole cliff walk. And it was. It had been out and about. It had done a long day. It's done.

[B]

This man backs the Antarctic. He needs to run this off

[C]

for

[B]

any length of time. No. Too much judgment. Too much scrutiny on the girth of my vagina. No. I'm growing your child while we're talking about this.

[C]

They can't. They couldn't possibly make a headline out of this, could they? Because, like, I just don't want my mom.

[B]

If anything, you should be. If you've got, like. They'll be like, Vogue Williams, Sugar Puff McGee.

[C]

What's the Sugar Puff Monster? What's his name? Google child? The Honey Monster.

[B]

The Honey Monster? Yeah. What is it? The Lavia Monster. That's what we'll call you. I mean, it's not that puffy. I'm looking at it now. It seems fine.

[C]

I'll show you.

[B]

It's not like I had to. You didn't have to come through the door sideways. You were fine.

[C]

Let's go for a long walk at the weekend. I'll show you after.

[B]

Funny drunk people have done. Now, these are the people who wanted your dinner party. Drunk man performed CPR on rubber dinghy after mistaking it for a dying person. Classic. Love him.

[C]

Bring him over.

[B]

Florida man obviously arrested for junk. Drunken joyride on motorized shopping cart. Standard. I wouldn't even do that. Pissed. I'd do that sober.

[C]

Who hasn't brought a traffic cone home with them? Come on.

[B]

This was a motorized shop.

[C]

I know. Yeah, but he's just up the game.

[B]

Yeah. Drunk man gets stuck in leprechaun caught out after celebrating 21st birthday. No, that's not. That's not. That's not that.

[C]

I like that one.

[B]

Intoxicated passenger tries to pay taxi fare with a live hamster. Now you're talking.

[C]

That's good.

[B]

That's good. Stephen, Stephen, optimize your social scene.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Man calls 911 to complain that the moon keeps following him. Now that shrooms. That shrooms for sure. Woman wakes up after night. I discover she's accidentally adopted a tortoise.

[C]

Did you see that woman? Did you ever see that video of this man had on his ring camera, and he was like. My wife said she was going out for a couple of drinks and there's a video of her getting out of the car. She walks around the back of the car and you don't really know what she's doing. And she stumbles the whole way around the back of the car, right back around to the front until she falls on her horse. And it's like. I didn't know what. I was like, is she dancing or what is she doing? She was literally just trying to stand up.

[B]

She didn't have to call an ambulance for her. In the end, there was the. There was the. The ring camera. Footage of her heading out the door looking, like, gorgeous. So, like, the cur. Blow dry.

[C]

The lashes were lashing.

[B]

And then cut to. She. Yeah, a couple of drinks. Yeah, blah, blah, blah. Cut to. I mean, look, she's living her best life. And like I say, I know I'm. I've loads of friends who don't drink. It's not about the drink side of it. It's just the preachiness or the sanctimonious shite or the earnestness of him.

[C]

He. I don't know.

[B]

It's like, oh, he just. He boils my blood.

[C]

Sorry. I hope you never Bump into him.

[B]

Maybe I fancy him.

[C]

I want to know what you feel about this Russell Crowe. Did you see him with the Autograph Hunters?

[B]

I saw, yeah. I, I. Okay, yeah, I thought I saw. He kind of had a bit of a wobble. But then I'm like, did he have a wobble or was he just. Absolutely. Was it just a melt?

[C]

So Russell Crowe walked outside his hotel room and there was a big crowd of people waiting out there to meet Russell Crowe. And he basically was like, he started it, but he was really blunt at the start. He was like, I'm gonna get to everybody. Everyone stay where you are. Don't start swarming me. I will get around and sign everyone's autographs. I. But just don't swarm me because then I'm leaving and I'll come to you. And then everyone was like, God, Russell Crowe's such a. And I was like, well, no, he's not a. Because he's actually told them all that he is going to go to them. He just doesn't want a load of people swarming on top of him, shoving things in his face. At least he can now, like, have a, A system. There's a system of organization there.

[B]

And also something you're the same about is he park.

[C]

You're like, girls, I will get to you.

[B]

There's a system. Girls.

[C]

Some people just collect autographs. They don't actually want your autograph. Do you never get that, like, and like, listen.

[B]

Oh, yeah, no, no, I've had them. Yeah.

[C]

Outside of Global and stuff like that. Listen, but I don't know who you think you're selling mine to, but, like, yeah, you can have three. No one's got three Eustace autographs that no one's gonna want. I would never buy somebody's autographed.

[B]

Although they're selling those autographs.

[C]

Yeah, they do. Although my friend got Theodore just to explain.

[B]

Sometimes there are autograph collectors, I guess.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Outside radio stations and stuff. So if you're listed as going on a radio show, they'll be there and they'll get a photo and you'll sign their book for them. And they usually have nice printed out

[C]

photos for you to sign, but they will sell those.

[B]

Are they selling them?

[D]

Yeah, well, not, not all autograph hunters, I'd say some of them just genuinely love you. The rest of them are selling them on ebay. And that's.

[B]

Yeah, I don't know how much that was Google. There is no way anyone's buying either of our six.

[C]

I don't want the Shame.

[D]

We could see who's getting the highest price, couldn't we?

[B]

Well, ever since my Wiki feet scandal when I got 3.5 for the time, I didn't manage to get a pedigure in time.

[C]

Are they up? Are they back up?

[B]

I don't know what it is now.

[C]

Well, anyway, so I, I, I personally think that Russell Crowe is right. What do you think?

[B]

Yeah, I think he's, I think he handled it really well. He knows security. He's bopping around. He was getting inundated. You're allowed to have a boundary, I think. I don't have any, but you're allowed to have them.

[C]

I think that some autographs like Theodore got given by our friend Far gave him an autographed T shirt by a footballer called Declan Rice. Is that his name?

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. And I just thought, that's nice of him to do that for tea.

[B]

You don't know Declan Rice?

[C]

I don't know any footballers. I'm learning.

[B]

Is he not an Irish footballer?

[D]

Well, he was eligible to play for Ireland, but he decided to play for England.

[C]

Come on now.

[B]

Like, I mean, we're sitting here taking the soup. I'm sitting here in a house in London. Do you know what I mean? And like, I'm not exactly Michael T. Higgins myself.

[C]

Give your money. Give your, Give your famous back to the state. He gave his money back to the state.

[B]

If you want to succeed and the play and the game that you're playing isn't going to. It's not going to happen for you in Ireland. I think you are entitled to want.

[C]

I have nothing bad to say about Declan Rice anyway, because he was. He did. Excuse me. I knew he was a footballer.

[B]

Oh, fine, fine, fine, fine.

[C]

Who plays for Arsenal? Does he?

[B]

Oh, my God. Joe was.

[C]

Okay, so John's feet have gone up.

[D]

Few bits of news. Firstly, Wiki feet is now blocked on my work laptop. I think they're on to me because I've had to search it so many times for you.

[B]

You're together. My rating. We had that agreement.

[D]

But not because I want to see your feet, but while we're at work together.

[B]

Yeah, but I was also asking you to anonymously.

[D]

I can't get to Wiki feet anymore. That's not something I can do. Okay, but autographs on ebay.

[C]

No.

[B]

Shut up.

[D]

Signed photos. Who wants to go first?

[B]

Are we on there?

[C]

Yeah. I absolutely cannot believe. Yeah, loads. Because no one's bought them. They just keep up.

[B]

They're in the. Two for one. Are, Are we in the Two for one aisle.

[D]

Okay, so I'll go for the top entry on ebay for both of you.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

Vogue. Yeah, Vogue Williams signed photo. Does look like your signature. Little kiss on the end.

[B]

I'm nervous for you.

[C]

I'm nervous. Well, I'm just happy I'm there, to be honest.

[B]

I can't believe it.

[D]

Do you know that 39.99 or best offer?

[B]

39. Well, that's not bad.

[C]

I'm kind of. That's not bad.

[B]

Yeah. My best offer. I mean it could be.

[C]

It could be a pound offer.30p and see if they take it.

[D]

It's four pound delivery as well.

[C]

Oh, God.

[B]

Joanne, tell them you'll deliver it yourself with a good offer. She'll live with herself. She'll waddle up herself. Weirdly, just for the cache, all of

[D]

Joanne's coming from Canada. If you want Joanne, you're paying more for delivery. It's coming from Canada. Pounds. Delivery.

[B]

Yeah. Okay. What am I?

[D]

£35 67 or better.

[C]

That's like really good for us. They're around the same, including delivery.

[B]

Thank God. Imagine if one of us. Imagine I was like six grand.

[D]

You actually are on. On a.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

This is.

[B]

This is nice for us. We're equals.

[C]

Just can't. We're even on there.

[B]

We're equals. I'm obviously firing all my agents, but we're equals. I'm firing everyone involved in my career, but we are equals.

[C]

Do you remember like going around like my kids go around Disney with little autograph books to get like Mickey Mouse's autograph and stuff like that? They love that.

[B]

Someone was saying to me recently they were trying to buy a cardboard cut out of me and they're like, you're not on there, but they're to put folks on there. And I was like, really?

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cardboard cut out of me. You can get one of Spenny. Spenny has calendars and stuff. Like he did all that jazz. Oh my God. I found stuff when I was clearing out the baby clothes. I. I did a calendar for the Star, the newspaper, this Daily Star. And there's a pictures of me on this like two page calendar.

[B]

Are you. What is it funny?

[C]

It's beep beep. Like knickers, but like underwear.

[B]

Yeah, but like, sorry, the bod is body.

[C]

I remember let people see it.

[B]

Let people enjoy the body.

[C]

I was thrilled with myself.

[B]

Let people enjoy us. Two of the greatest comebacks of our generation. Robert Downey Jr. Did he go away? Robert Downey Jr. Had a very bag. Bad.

[C]

Sorry.

[B]

Robert Downey Jr. Had a Very, very bad drug problem and he was basically uninsurable. And no such a long time ago, companies would work with him. And then he got cast in Iron Man. How he got cast, I don't know.

[C]

I think he cleaned up his act by then.

[B]

Cleaned up his act and, like, people really like him. But there was. I'm sure there's some story behind it, but it was like one of the biggest comebacks in Hollywood history. And everyone's like, oh, my God, Robert Downey Junior's back.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Second biggest comeback of our generation. Yeah. Susan Boyle.

[C]

Susan A. Body Boyle.

[B]

Susan Body Boyle. She is. I've never seen anyone make a Karen haircut work. It is. The bob is back, the glasses. She's wearing faux fur.

[C]

She's doing full length faux fur.

[B]

Did you know she. So obviously we all know Susan Boyle. She won X Factor, Britain's Got Talent.

[C]

Britain's Got Talent. She won Britain. She was an amazing opera singer.

[B]

I'll never forget it. She walked out on stage, Britain's Got Talent. And at the time we were very used to seeing kind of young. It was like the One Direction era, little mix, all that stuff. Gareth Gates. And she came out, she was an older auditioner.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And she was like, you know, dress normal dress, doing her bits and bobs. She wasn't. Maybe she wasn't giving star when she walked out. I think it's fair to say that's

[C]

a very good way of putting.

[B]

She wasn't giving star. She looked just normal, like she looked like a regular person. And then she. And there was kind of like a little bit of like kind of judgment in the audience. You could hear them. There was a little tone.

[C]

I feel like people weren't expecting very much when she walked out on stage.

[B]

Exactly. And then she opened her voice and she hammered them, which I dreamed a dream. And it was like Pavarotti. Here we go. Unbelievable. And it was that great moment of like, just, you know, you weren't expecting us. Wow. What a. What a performance. Then she went on to have a very decent career. She was a household name. Yeah. But she is, she's. She's. I don't know, she's cut out for, like, she wants it.

[C]

She doesn't want to be in the public eye all the time. She lives, like quite a quiet life. Yeah. Scotland, where she was from, bought a nice house. She lives out her days there. But she is kind of iconic.

[B]

Like, she looks good, gorgeous.

[C]

Her voice is incredible. What she did was amazing. And I think it's in the face of everybody not expecting it big time. Like, everybody kind of had her. Peg does, like, just. She'll be a flash in the pan. She'll be gone. And she's kind of hung around.

[B]

And then I think people were like, is she, like, equipped for fame? Is anyone? I don't know. Anyway, then she kind of went a little bit quiet. One, two, skip a few.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Bang, bang, bang. She strips her Instagram account, she writes, she does one update where she goes, oh, it's boiling out there. New track up on the way. Everyone's like, what? The promo photos of her dressed like. I saw one person. So anyway, she comes out, we're like, oh, my God, what's happening? Susan Boyle is back. She's wearing great shades. She's got. She's making the Karen Bob work.

[C]

Anna Winter, full blown.

[B]

She's. She's rinsed the Instagram. She's starting again, dropping tracks. Hint, hint, nudge, nudge. We're like, oh, my God, what's going on? Turns out it is a genius.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

for Cornetto. She has released a remix of the Cornetto tune Just for Cornetto, which I like to sing. You do. And like I say, it's a banger.

[C]

It turns into, like a bit of a dance. A dance song.

[B]

I was thinking of going to Ibiza in August, and now I'm like, I don't know if I need to. If I just get a saunas in the garden. I beat it in August, buying out season boil and get a new paddle pill.

[C]

She can't go to Ibiza.

[B]

We don't need to now because Susan's bringing the chance you will melt away. How dare you? I'm gonna come off the anti depression.

[C]

You went to Ibiza? Look, John's gonna be whimpering on my door for the next six months.

[B]

Well, I just think fair play season, you're back in the game and you

[C]

look forward to it.

[B]

What do we look forward to?

[C]

Well, I mean, she's got. I look forward to the tune coming in. She's gotten paid, I'd say an absolute fortune from Cronin.

[B]

I hope she has.

[C]

Of course she has you mad.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

With elemental marketing behind it, she's deleted her whole Instagram. It's fair.

[B]

It was very Taylor Swift coded. I also think now that she's back,

[C]

a couple of hundred grand, I'd say,

[B]

in this iconic way. But now she'll actually be back also. It's a great way if you're like, I'm not artist with the whole fame side of things. I just want to live my life. Live a private life. Yeah. Come in every five years, drop a banger for Cornetto Solero, Magnum.

[C]

Whoever's going, Michael Buble does it. Why can't she?

[B]

Her surname is Boil. It makes sense. She's a summer brand. Yeah, Michael Buble is Christmas. He defrosts out of Christmas. She refrosts, freezes, comes out at summer. I'm here for it. Also, if she's. I. Do you know what? I. I can guarantee you now she'll be DJing next.

[C]

Well, do you know Martin Kemp makes an absolute fortune? Dj. He goes around, sells out, like all these places all over the country. He does Friday, Saturday, Sunday, every single week.

[B]

No way.

[C]

Sells out. Massive gigs. Yeah.

[B]

I really want to learn how to dj, Joe. I have. I've. I have signed up for a pottery class. So maybe after that, say goodbye. That's it for me.

[C]

And me.

[B]

And Live from my home. It's got its own door and a lock.

[C]

And it does have a front garden.

[B]

Joe, you've seen the front garden? Well, I mean, it's. It's. It's an area.

[D]

Beautiful. It looks like someone hoovered it.

[C]

I don't.

[B]

Thank you for suggesting that. I actually did. I just hear it earlier.

[C]

Bye, everyone.

[B]

Full blown hoovered it. The neighbors were looking at me. I was like, hey, yeah.

[C]

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