MTGM EXTRA! "Ghosted after HOW long?!"

Summary

Podcast Summary: MTGM EXTRA! "Ghosted after HOW long?!"

Episode Release Date: August 13, 2025

Hosts: Vogue Williams & Joanne McNally Guest: Grace Campbell

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Introduction: Welcome to the Bonus Episode The episode kicks off with Joanne McNally announcing the special bonus edition of "My Therapist Ghosted Me," setting the stage for an engaging and candid discussion. Grace Campbell briefly joins the conversation, adding to the anticipation of the episode's unique content.

Notable Quote:

• Joanne McNally [00:02]: "Welcome to the bonus episode of My Therapist Ghosted Me."

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Casual Banter and Playful Jokes The trio dives into light-hearted banter, sharing jokes about stereotypes and personal preferences. Joanne humorously addresses societal assumptions, emphasizing that her previous comments were merely in jest.

Notable Quotes:

• Joanne McNally [01:16]: "I have the same strategy or the same philosophy as I do with women and eating disorders. I just assume most men are creeps and most women have an eating disorder and then you work back from there."
• Grace Campbell [01:26]: "You have said way worse in this podcast with. It's a joke. Now we know."

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Anecdotes About Flight Experiences Grace and Joanne share their experiences flying, especially with children, highlighting the challenges and humorous mishaps that can occur. Joanne references Michelle Wolf's podcast to illustrate the chaos of flying with a baby, drawing parallels to her own hypothetical parenting scenarios.

Notable Quotes:

• Joanne McNally [03:12]: "She was talking about flying with a baby. She's like, it is hell on earth."
• Grace Campbell [04:24]: "When I flew back from Gladiators and I flew into Manchester, then I had to travel an hour and a half to Sheffield, and my mom was like, you must be wrecked. I was like, what?"

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Dog Ownership and Pet Stories The conversation shifts to the joys and challenges of dog ownership. Joanne narrates a humorous incident involving her friend's dog, Eddie, on a train ride to Margate, leading to an amusing debate about the practicality of being a "dog mom."

Notable Quotes:

• Joanne McNally [07:05]: "Grace was acting like just like she did. I was like, grace, we need them to know it's the dog."
• Grace Campbell [07:31]: "It's gonna be people that knew you on that train. And they're like, jesus Christ, we saw Joanna McNally on the train. She fucking reeks."

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Humorous Discussion on Personal Health Grace shares a funny yet awkward story about a mishap with a tampon on a water slide, prompting Joanne to humorously question the plausibility of the event. The hosts use this moment to blend humor with a light touch on personal health topics.

Notable Quotes:

• Grace Campbell [09:26]: "I went down these water slides. Holy God. Some things in life, I'm like, you know what?"
• Joanne McNally [10:07]: "There's no amount of water in the world that could reverse the Tampon inside you and flip it upside down. Not happen."

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Main Topic: Ghosting After a Long-Term Relationship Grace opens up about being ghosted by her boyfriend of five and a half years, sparking an in-depth discussion on ghosting in long-term relationships. Joanne and Vogue express empathy, dissecting the emotional impact and offering supportive advice.

Notable Quotes:

• Grace Campbell [13:53]: "I've just been fully, completely, entirely and totally ghosted by my boyfriend of five and a half years."
• Joanne McNally [16:51]: "Sometimes imagine going home and they're gone."

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Advice on Moving Forward and Dating After a Long-Term Relationship The hosts provide thoughtful advice for listeners navigating the transition to single life after long-term relationships. They emphasize the importance of self-discovery, building new social circles, and embracing new methods of meeting people, such as unique dating apps.

Notable Quotes:

• Joanne McNally [20:26]: "Jump straight in. Ask no questions, don't even ask a second name. Just move in with them."
• Grace Campbell [23:50]: "I think that that's a really nice idea to do that and to try and just get yourself back out there and to meet people instead of having to do it by an app."

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Closing Remarks and Listener Engagement As the episode winds down, the hosts encourage listeners to reach out via email for more personal stories and advice. They wrap up with playful interactions, maintaining the episode's light-hearted and supportive tone.

Notable Quotes:

• Joanne McNally [27:02]: "[e-mail]."
• Grace Campbell [27:17]: "She says she's had a couple of months of tough nights."

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Conclusion This bonus episode of "My Therapist Ghosted Me" offers a blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and heartfelt advice. Vogue, Joanne, and Grace engage in an open and honest conversation about the complexities of ghosting, especially in long-term relationships, while maintaining their signature wit and camaraderie. Listeners gain valuable insights into coping mechanisms and strategies for rebuilding their social lives post-relationship, all delivered with the hosts' characteristic 100% honesty and laughter.

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Connect with the Hosts:

• Email: [e-mail]
• Website: mytherapistghostedme.com
• Privacy Policy: Global Privacy Policy

For advertising opportunities, contact: [e-mail]

Transcript

[Joanne McNally]

This is a Global Player original podcast. Hello. Welcome to the bonus episode of My therapist Ghosted me. It is the bonus episode.

[Vogue Williams]

Nice.

[Grace Campbell]

Is it the bonus.

[Joanne McNally]

Just making sure both of you knew that it was the bonus episode. Good.

[Grace Campbell]

What day does it come out?

[Joanne McNally]

Bonus episode comes out on Wednesday. Vogue. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the main app comes out on the Friday. What our listeners won't know is that we've. We're recording the. The hello. After we've recorded the podcast and Vogue is this is she's exacting revenge for the fact that she doesn't know the email address.

[Vogue Williams]

Yeah. You'll have to wait until the end to see why she wanted revenge.

[Joanne McNally]

Yeah. Why she wants revenge.

[Grace Campbell]

Well, it went down like, listen, so there we. It's hard to keep up with who's a creep these days. Like, are you a creep? Am I right? Are you. Is that okay to say that? You just don't know?

[Joanne McNally]

I have the same strategy or the same philosophy as I do with women and eating disorders. I just. I assume most men are creeps and most women have an eating disorder and then you work back from there.

[Grace Campbell]

Oh, that's a good. I suppose it's a good starting point.

[Joanne McNally]

That was a joke. That was a joke. I don't believe either of those things. I love men and I don't believe that all women have eating disorders. It's just a joke. Just a little joke. Jokey joke.

[Vogue Williams]

Fun joke.

[Joanne McNally]

Just a fun joke.

[Vogue Williams]

Just for fun.

[Joanne McNally]

Fun, little stereotypical joke.

[Grace Campbell]

You have said way worse in this podcast with. It's a joke. Now we know. Now we're. Now we know where she draws the line. I know.

[Joanne McNally]

Well, I don't. I don't think it's fair to accuse all men of being creeps. I actually am a huge fan of men and. And you know what? I don't even have to say, actually, because they know it. God knows they know.

[Grace Campbell]

Of course. You're a. I'm a big fan of it. I do. I have to say, I do prefer a female company. I prefer hanging out with girls. I love being around women. But I suppose when I get like, no, there's nothing. I know. I just prefer hanging out with women. It's just the way it is.

[Joanne McNally]

Yeah, you're a girly girl. You're a girly whirly. You're a girly, wordy girls. I am the same. I would say my predominantly. I am female focused, but that's why I think we enjoy the company of gay men. Because you have that masculine energy in the room, but you know they would vomit if they saw your tits.

[Grace Campbell]

What the hell is that?

[Joanne McNally]

I had a fire alarm fitted yesterday.

[Vogue Williams]

Right now, your house is on fire alarm.

[Grace Campbell]

You just sleep with that noise going.

[Joanne McNally]

Off all the time? I've only just gotten back. That's the second time it's happened since I got back. Lauren was here. I don't know what's going on. It just. It's. It's okay. It's every half an hour, so we'll be fine. Good.

[Grace Campbell]

Every. It's every half an hour. Well, good luck going to bed. Night. Now, in fairness, Joanne, you could probably sleep through most things.

[Joanne McNally]

I could be hoging the thing I.

[Grace Campbell]

Have to have, honestly. I got these. These new earplugs are absolutely rotten.

[Joanne McNally]

They're.

[Grace Campbell]

They're kind of like wax. And I put them in my ears and I can hear nothing. And it is my favorite way to sleep. I might drop the headphones. I don't even need these for the flight anymore. I'm just going to take those wax earplugs and put them in and I'll just feel like I'm underwater and having a nice time.

[Joanne McNally]

I was listening to Michelle Wolf, who's a comic that I'm a huge fan of. She has a podcast called, I think it's Thought Box. And she basically just. She write. She's a prolific joke writer, and she has this podcast where she just kind of talks about premises of stuff. It's not like really honed stuff. It's just. She had an idea and she just kind of fleshes it out. But she was talking about. Which had never occurred to me, really, because as much as I love a long haul Vogue, you love a long haul, but you love a child free. Long haul, obviously. But she was talking about. She said flying with a baby. She's like, it is hell on earth. Then she obviously has to fly because of her job. She's a standup, she's on tour, but she's like, you can't. Like the joy of me, like as an. When you have no kids, with you being able to zone out, watch a film, blah, blah. She's like, you can't. You can't put your headphones in. You can't take your eye off them. She's like, it's absolute hell. She said now being on stage working is like the holiday for her. Because outside of that, having the child with her on tour and everything, I'm obviously thinking about this with, you know, I talk about my hypothetical Baby, but, yeah, you just made me think of that. When you're talking about your headphones on the plane, I'm like, maybe because they're a little bit older, you can do that. But I'd say when they were younger, you couldn't. You couldn't zone out. You can't tap out of your kids. Sad.

[Grace Campbell]

I can't fully do it now. And Spenny's after playing a total blinder because he had to go back to London today for work, knowing that we're flying tomorrow. He's like, oh, I've totally forgot about this Clean Coast Supper Club. I'm like, oh, did you?

[Joanne McNally]

Did you?

[Grace Campbell]

I want to see the evidence of it. But when I flew back from Gladiators and I flew into Manchester, then I had to travel an hour and a half to Sheffield, and my mom was like, you must be wrecked. I was like, what? I was like, it feels like I'm on holiday. I know I'm on holiday here, but, like, it's like the three kids are off school the whole time. Like, it's very, like. I think I posted a picture where Gigi was on my back and also was on my front. And it's kind of like that all day long here, and I love it. And that's what I was so looking forward to. But, like, now I'm like, okay, I can go. I can go back to work now.

[Joanne McNally]

Would you not have given Spencer for the real holiday? Would you not have given Spencer, like, 1.5 children to kind of split the load and get him to take 1.5 ham early?

[Grace Campbell]

Yeah, well, listen, he offered. He was like, I'll take Gigi. I was like, no, no auto, if you're taking.

[Joanne McNally]

The problem.

[Grace Campbell]

Yeah, I did send him. I sent him back with all my luggage, though. I was like, you've got to take it because it's so many bags to try and take on your own. Because as well, we're over. We're here and we go to Gibraltar. So we have to cross the border in Gibraltar so we don't get a taxi to drag all the bags. Like, it's a nightmare. I know. So, like, that's why. That's why I'm sitting here. And I'm like, why am I so anxious about going home? I think I'm just anxious about, like, clearing this place up and. And getting. Getting across the border. I'm anxious.

[Joanne McNally]

Yeah, I get that. I. I get that. I was even. I was. I was. I'm back from my seaside break in Margate where I was with my good friend and fellow comic Grace Campbell. And she had with her a teeny tiny dog, her dog called Eddie, who's gorgeous, sweet little thing. But even three days in Margate, I was like, wow, the dog really goes everywhere. Like there's no leaving the dog. And I've. My biggest wet dream is to own a family of dogs. I could maybe even birth one myself if I wait long enough for science to catch up with my dreams. But when I saw.

[Grace Campbell]

Thought you were having an alien.

[Joanne McNally]

Who knows what I'm going to have.

[Grace Campbell]

It's all to play for slippery fishy alien future.

[Joanne McNally]

The future is bright. AI is here. Who knows what. I could be birthing an Alsatian in six months time, we do not know. But watching the amount of work that she has to put into that dog, I was like, Jesus, Grace, you're kind of putting me off getting a dog.

[Grace Campbell]

I know, but her dog is like her baby. I'm not saying my dogs aren't like my baby, but they're still like. Like they don't sleep my bed or anything like that. Like they can stay at home for a few hours on their own, like they're gonna be fine. And they get walked loads, but they are still dogs.

[Joanne McNally]

She was like, you know, the dog had fart and on the train and I was making sure everyone knew it was the dog. And Grace was kind of like, oh.

[Grace Campbell]

Everyone knows when it's a dog by the way. You know that scent.

[Joanne McNally]

Grace was acting like just like she did.

[Grace Campbell]

She.

[Joanne McNally]

I was like, grace, we need them to know it's the dog. Yeah. So I was like, it's the dog, guys. It was like an hour and a half train to Margate and you could see people like moving away from us and everything. It was. It was embarrassing, frankly. I wanted to leave Eddie off in Williams.

[Grace Campbell]

Where?

[Joanne McNally]

Brothel. Wherever we passed, I don't know. But she's like, no, no, the dog stays.

[Grace Campbell]

It's gonna be people that knew you on that train. And they're like, jesus Christ, we saw Joanna McNally on the train. She fucking reeks.

[Joanne McNally]

So I was. I was like genuinely kind of like trying to get eye contact with people to point at this little dog in the middle of me and Grace as she fed a chicken and it just all fell on the floor. And I was like, grace, I don't know if dogging is for me. That was an accidental slip of the tongue there. But I don't know if dog momming is for me. I've become very, very.

[Grace Campbell]

I would suggest right I'm going away. I need someone to help with. With Winston. I was gonna say Winston. Otto, Winston and Bertie. And why don't you have them for a few days and see what you know?

[Joanne McNally]

Well, the problem is. And I would do that. I genuinely would take them because I do like the company without there being any real strings attached. Which is similar to how I feel about gay men. That's. And their friendships. However. Yeah. My problem is I have no garden. And the idea of running up and down those stairs every time that they need to wet themselves is. It's too much for me. But otherwise I would take.

[Grace Campbell]

You have a lift.

[Joanne McNally]

Have you seen the lift?

[Grace Campbell]

Yeah, I haven't been in the lift. A bit scary. But you like the lift?

[Joanne McNally]

I just. I'm not taking the dogs folk. I'll tell you what.

[Grace Campbell]

Move into my house. I'm not there. Move in.

[Joanne McNally]

But is your family and staff there?

[Grace Campbell]

Spencer. Spencer. Yeah, some of it.

[Joanne McNally]

I'm not gay. Crashing Spanner's free time.

[Grace Campbell]

I went down. There's these blow up water slides. I was. And there's this lovely girl, this Irish girl who was there. She sound. Anyway, I went down these water slides. Holy God. Some things in life, I'm like, you know what? I'm too old for this. There are blow up water slides. I have never had so much water go up my ass and the whole of 10 hair.

[Joanne McNally]

You said this. You told us this before.

[Grace Campbell]

I didn't. It only happened today. I went to the toilet then because I've got my period and I was like, oh my God, it's the tampon gone. But it hadn't gone. But it had flipped the entire way around. So the string was the other way from the water slide. What?

[Joanne McNally]

I'm sorry. Vogue. I love and trust you, but I'm gonna have to fact check this story. Like, how wide are you down there that a gush of water can reverse a tampon?

[Grace Campbell]

I honestly. Because it was so much water. Because you're hurtling down this slide and there was a big puddle at the end of it. It just went woof. And I was like, oh my God. And then I was walking around and I was like, something doesn't feel right.

[Joanne McNally]

Yeah. I think you were roofied at the end of that water slide and you don't know it. And someone did something to you, put you back but in the wrong position. Like when you know it's like that. I. Because there's just. I'm sorry. There's no amount of water in the world that could reverse the Tampon inside you and flip it upside down. Not happen.

[Grace Campbell]

Joanne, I'm afraid that you cannot. You actually having not experienced it, you cannot judge that. And no, I don't have a giant vagina. Do you remember when I had the electric chair in my home for months? This is like sorted down here.

[Joanne McNally]

That and it was a.

[Grace Campbell]

And it was a regular tampon.

[Joanne McNally]

Okay, okay folk. I'm just saying you're opening yourself up to photos or it didn't happen. I've never heard. I've never, I've never. Like tampons are hard enough to get out with pure force. Do you know that's why they have the string. You have to pull them out. So you're saying the water flipped. What do gladiators do to your body? This is suspicious.

[Vogue Williams]

To what we could get some data on it.

[Joanne McNally]

There's.

[Vogue Williams]

There is an email address. If anybody's got any data on this then do let us know.

[Joanne McNally]

Yes.

[Grace Campbell]

No. Has a tampon ever flipped inside you when you went on the water slides.

[Vogue Williams]

Water slide.

[Joanne McNally]

I think you.

[Grace Campbell]

A blow up water slide.

[Joanne McNally]

I think this was some sort of ayahuasca event and he didn't realize and I think you were unconscious for part of it. I've had situations.

[Grace Campbell]

How desperate are you to go on the water slide now though? How desperate?

[Joanne McNally]

Not desperate at all. I don't need.

[Grace Campbell]

I find it to be a very enjoyable experience.

[Joanne McNally]

I don't need to be widened down there. I am perfectly fine with. With my gate. This is come. This comes back to your white guide folk.

[Grace Campbell]

My wide gate.

[Joanne McNally]

This comes back to your white gate. I mean I've had. And this is where. I know I feel bad for male listeners but like I've had situations where I've certainly lost a tampon inside myself. It has gone AWOL and had to be excavated out, but it was still in the same position that it went in.

[Vogue Williams]

In excavations of power.

[Joanne McNally]

I think he just put it. My God. Says you put in. No Vogue. My says you put the tampon in upside down and you forgot.

[Grace Campbell]

I didn't.

[Joanne McNally]

Because you're a secret alcoholic.

[Grace Campbell]

Because I use. Because I use the applicator.

[Joanne McNally]

Finally we can admit it. Thank you. I was just covering for her. It's her. She's the problem.

[Grace Campbell]

In fairness now this is going to sound bad. I don't know. I wanted to be left in but when I had had a few drinks I did put a second tap. Forgetting first we've all done that and then the next morning I was like, oh, whoa.

[Joanne McNally]

Oh, we've all done that sometimes it's like pulling rabbits out of a hatch. You're like, jesus Christ, how many did I get in there? Oh, yeah, we've all done that.

[Grace Campbell]

Oh, no.

[Joanne McNally]

Yeah, we've all done that. That's where I think they should have a little alarm in them.

[Grace Campbell]

An alarm, but, like, maybe to be, I think, like an egg. Less. Less dangerous. Aren't they?

[Joanne McNally]

Can't you get, like, toxic shock syndrome? Yeah, that's a real thing. There was a very. She's very famous. Well, now. Because of what happened to her. But there was a model. I think she's South African or American. I'd have to fact check that. Which obviously I won't do. But her parents found her face down on. In the ground. On the ground in her flat. Toxic shock syndrome. Both legs amputated. Yeah. Now, I don't know what the stats are. I feel like for the amount of women who are using tampons, that the. Maybe it's not that common an occurrence, but, I mean, it is a risk for sure.

[Vogue Williams]

Just be careful out there.

[Grace Campbell]

I do. I do.

[Joanne McNally]

Be careful out there.

[Grace Campbell]

A dangerous game.

[Joanne McNally]

Jesus.

[Grace Campbell]

But I'd rather. I'd rather that than the alternative.

[Joanne McNally]

Being a woman is a dangerous game.

[Grace Campbell]

Girls. I'm not winning much at the moment, so. Looking to claim a title? If it's there for the taking, sure. I've just been fully, completely, entirely and totally ghosted by my boyfriend of. Wait for it.

[Joanne McNally]

No.

[Grace Campbell]

Five and a half years.

[Joanne McNally]

What? I mean, I really thought you were gonna say months there. Oh, my God.

[Grace Campbell]

I went straight to thinking his mother has done a terrible job. But I can't blame her for that. His fault, too.

[Joanne McNally]

Oh, I'd say Otto's got a couple of ghostings in him. Let's face it, the stories you're telling about that lad of late.

[Grace Campbell]

He'S turned a corner. He's turned a corner. If there's anything Spain has done, it.

[Joanne McNally]

Has turned a corner. Yeah. No one can see him anymore. That's a ghosting Meg.

[Grace Campbell]

Okay, this is terrible. If you're a numbers gal, you know that means we met when the clock struck, Covid. Okay, we aren't. I wouldn't say we're complete numbers girls, but anyway.

[Joanne McNally]

Literally, power officer, really. But yeah, Alexa was the set. It was the 70s. Carry on.

[Grace Campbell]

Literally three weeks before lockdown was our first date. We got through that. Moved in pretty soon because of it. And I've had a great few years or so. I thought the sex probably wasn't the same as it was to start with, but it surely never is. Five years in, everything changes. I've tried my best to think back through any signs, but I honestly don't think there were any. I've had a couple of pretty tough nights, but I'm coming through it now, sharing it with you as part of my unofficial therapy. So can I start the bidding at five and a half years and see if anyone has been ghosted?

[Vogue Williams]

Sorry. She's after a couple. She says she's had a couple of months of tough nights.

[Grace Campbell]

Oh, a couple of. I was.

[Joanne McNally]

I did. I did think, wow, this is a very resilient woman. I'd be in an echo chamber on that 24 7. Yeah. She's like, I'm out of the weekend.

[Vogue Williams]

Was difficult, but I'm all right now.

[Grace Campbell]

Oh, my God. I do. As a whole weekend. Put him over. I don't even know where. I actually think that that's something you're gonna tell people until the day you die because it's such a shocking. I would like. I'd love more insight into that. Like, what happened? Did he just. Did he go home one day and he was just gone.

[Joanne McNally]

I would actually ask for more detail if we can get it from this woman who was a victim of something, a heinous act of, like, insensitivity and absolute brutal rudeness.

[Grace Campbell]

Ring his mom and tell her. Tell his mom on her. It's always tell his mom.

[Joanne McNally]

I'd say, I like, look, I've. The mother doesn't. Mothers love their sons. That's what I've learned over the years. And they will side with their sons. Ultimately.

[Grace Campbell]

That is. That is shot. That is dirty, shocking behavior. And he is an absolute pile of.

[Joanne McNally]

He's a ghee bag. But I would need. I would like to have more detail, genuinely. You can contact me privately or via the. Via mtgmpod.com.

[Grace Campbell]

Yeah, do it by this. And we'll. And we'll get back to that one, because that is a very interesting.

[Joanne McNally]

That would suggest to me he's having some sort of mental event. Like, did he take the furniture? Has he blocked her? Like, what are the details here? Has he. Is there someone else involved? Of course there is. Sorry. That's always my take on it. Joe as well, you know, men don't leave to be on their own. Men only jump when there's somewhere to jump, too. They're like frogs on lily pads.

[Grace Campbell]

That's all.

[Joanne McNally]

That's always been the way. Has she heard anything of him since? Has she. How far has she gone to try and contact him? What's the crack.

[Grace Campbell]

Is he just gone? Yeah. Is he just gone? Gone? Now, in fairness, I know this was a terrible thing that happened to you, but I do wish that it happened to me a couple of times to be fair.

[Joanne McNally]

Yeah. Fair. Yeah.

[Grace Campbell]

Sometimes imagine going home and they're gone.

[Joanne McNally]

Yes. Yeah. Sometimes you're like a little spooky behavior on their part would go very far for us, actually. I know. But ultimately the bottom line is that it's a weakness on his side. Like, it's very cowardly and like, look, it's pathetic. It is pathetic. That is pathetic for sure. These are conversations that are very tough to have and some people literally just don't have the emotional ability to have them. They just do not have. But rest assured, this will sit. This is a stain on him for the rest of his life. Like, he will remember this as much as you will. And you get to walk away with your head held high and be like, look what this fella did to me. How embarrassing. And this is, as Nora Aan's mother said, everything is copy. You'll tell the story and everyone will love the story and lean in and want to hear more. It's a great conversation starter.

[Grace Campbell]

We need. We do need more. We need more. But I do the other email and we'll wait for more of this one for next week because I think that that would be really good if you wouldn't mind sending us the rest in. God, what a wanker. Honestly, very strange behavior. I mean, just. It is just really odd behavior though. It's like, is he having a mental breakdown or is he just that much of a. And it is so pathetic and as you said, cowardly.

[Joanne McNally]

Immature, I would say. There's no emotional. It's very immature. He just cannot have. He's just not equipped for the conversation. He's just not equipped. He just literally can't do it. He just ran, you know, he just bailed.

[Grace Campbell]

Yeah. I used to hate breaking up with people, though.

[Joanne McNally]

Oh, it's horrible. It's awful. But it's just a convers that has to be had. It's just one of those things in life. You can't bail, you know, unless you're 13. Maybe he was 13.

[Grace Campbell]

Was this an Irish college?

[Joanne McNally]

This did happen in the 70s. As far as folks, Vulcan, our maths has concluded it was the 70s, so maybe it was 13.

[Grace Campbell]

Okay, here's another one. I would love any of your advice or insight into starting to date after a long term relationship. Oh, no, this is bad. Long, boring. Story short, I find myself single after being married for 24 years. Very hard.

[Joanne McNally]

Very hard.

[Grace Campbell]

Oh no. There's good news. As you can imagine, this is all a bit daunting and very new for me. The apps, the putting yourself out there as a 45 year old. You are so young. The change my body has gone through after having two kids, etc.

[Joanne McNally]

Yeah, different beast, different beasts.

[Grace Campbell]

I'm finding it hard to be my usual confident self online. I really want to lean into my cougar adolescence phase, but don't know where to begin. Thoughts? I would. This is the best thing that I ever did for myself. After breaking up with somebody at the age of 30 and thinking that I'd never get married and I'd never have kids. So worried I thought my life was literally over. I was like a divorced 30 year old. I felt like a loser and the best thing that I ever did because I was, I was in relationship after relationship, long term relationships, my whole life and I spent time on my own for the first time and I hated it at the start and I was like, you know what? I actually love this. Each, each, each week it got easier and easier and I was just really, really enjoying myself. And by the time I did get into another relationship with Spencer, like I kind of didn't want to be in a relationship because I was enjoying being on my own so much. So I think if you can find a way to start enjoying your own company without having someone to rely on because when you have a partner of 24 years like that's like you're like you'd never have to go anywhere on your own. You've got that crutch to go to a party but you just have to try and get over those really hard bits.

[Joanne McNally]

In one way I think actually when you're with someone that long, you're, you're wired to be in a pair so you want, you're naturally, you want to jump back into that situation and I think that for some people that's the right thing to do. I. Being on your own, it's hard. I was only thinking about this last week because I'm still writing for Peanuthone and like trying to add bits and stuff. Like being on your own, it is, it's fucking hard. And the longer you're on your own, the longer it or the harder it becomes to get into a relationship again because you have all your own little weird ways and I can understand her wanting to get back out there and also kind of the validation that comes with being attractive or being attracted to somebody and all those flutters and the crushes and all like it is lovely. But you know what I would say apparently the dating apps are on the way out now. I don't think they're on the way out, but apparently Bumble let go of like 45% of its staff or something. People aren't using them in the same way. And now it's gone back to this kind of almost vintage nostalgic way of meeting, which is going out. But you know what? I started doing and I never went because that's what I do. But I did book and then cancel almost immediately. But I will go back to them. There's these. I don't know where this woman is based. Do we know where she's based? Because this is a London thing anyway. There's these new ways of meeting people where you book a table, you add your, you add your name to the list in your local area and they book a table for five people. Through this app. There's no romantic expectations. It's just five strangers and you answer a questionnaire beforehand about like your interests and your hobbies and things like that. And then they match you with these people. It could be all women you don't know or could be you and four men, whatever. And then you go and you have dinner in a restaurant and it's like a two hour window and you just get to know them. And I was thinking that's actually a really good way to go about it because it isn't the same pressure of matching with someone on a dating app and then just going one to one and kind of interviewing each other without anyone there. That it's more a natural way back into a social scene. Because also when you're married. I don't know, I've never been married. But I'm assuming your kind of social scene has to change as well because usually married people hang out with married people. So if no one around you is married, like you need to kind of meet single people or. Yeah, people who live on their own and in your local area. So I don't know where she's based and I can't remember the name of the app. It's called Find Friends or something. I thought that was, I thought that was a nicer way of doing it. I was thinking about going, doing it that way and then you just meet interesting people and then it kind, kind of will go towards filling some of the void that's there anyway.

[Grace Campbell]

Yeah, I think that that's a really nice idea to do that and to, to try and just get yourself back out there and to meet people instead of having to do it.

[Joanne McNally]

Yeah.

[Grace Campbell]

By an app. But also now I, I don't want this to sound bad, but I get what you're saying about married people kind of sticking together and wanting to go out with married people. Like I'm. I'm very. Not that I'm very careful, but like I like having my separate friends and I like spending to have a separate friends and I want him to go out. I just think it's really important to have your own sets of friends and your own interests and not just always be doing stuff just together. Like you'll obviously do stuff together, but also just being your own separate entity is really important to keep that in any relationship.

[Joanne McNally]

Of course. And coming out of a 24 year marriage is a 24. That is a life altering event. Do you know what I mean? You have to reboot everything. So I don't know if we've really given advice. I don't know. I do think the friends thing is felt to me like a more organic way of meeting people because yeah, the dating opposite, they're like, they're stressful and they're hard. And also, I know this sounds so stupid. Get out of the house. And I say that to myself as well. Get out and about. It's always through friends of friends is the best way to meet people. Except there's no one around anymore. Everyone's dead.

[Grace Campbell]

Well, you're 40. No. People are getting divorced now. It's around that time.

[Joanne McNally]

Not as many as you think, folks. Joke. That was very much what I was waiting for. Yeah. Things seem to be really. People seem to be really buckling down.

[Grace Campbell]

That marriage ago.

[Joanne McNally]

People are really taking those vows inconsiderably seriously.

[Grace Campbell]

I think I read, I read too many books where there's all these single billionaires and it's just, it's obviously not the reality. Is it not? No. Well, there you go. I have. Do you have any more advice? My advice would be if you're gonna go down a water slide, wear a pad.

[Joanne McNally]

That's not real life, that's chilly keeper. I do think the longer you're out and the harder they are to get back in. So, yeah, I would say jump straight in. Straight in. Ask no questions, don't even ask a second name. Just move in with them.

[Grace Campbell]

Thank God. I'm sorry about that. That's really tough.

[Joanne McNally]

Thank you. It is tough for me. Thank you, Vogue. It's not often you give me sympathy like that and I do appreciate it.

[Grace Campbell]

Oh my God. Imagine you met someone at my birthday.

[Joanne McNally]

I've known to check my moles.

[Grace Campbell]

I'll check your moles. I have too many. I have to go into a special place.

[Joanne McNally]

It's gonna say, you've enough of your own mouth.

[Grace Campbell]

Yeah, no one can be checking my mouth. I literally have to go somewhere. You've got 1300 marks on your body. Yeah, I know.

[Joanne McNally]

She's like, I have to do a week.

[Grace Campbell]

They're like, I book it and they're like, yeah, it's 250 quid to get your mill check. And then I walk in, they're like, oh, no, sorry. Yeah, we didn't realize. It's actually 1500 quid.

[Joanne McNally]

Yeah, we've had to call for backup. We're getting doctors out of retirement and everything. The team, we have to grow it so much.

[Grace Campbell]

Well, thanks everyone for listening and please do send your emails in to.

[Joanne McNally]

Ah, come on, come on, come on, be honest.

[Grace Campbell]

I had a few drinks last night again. And I know I said I wasn't. Oh, yeah. But my brain is a bit foggy. You do it. MTG. Hello. [e-mail].

[Joanne McNally]

Shut up. She's Rage B.

[Grace Campbell]

Is it that global? Is it A Global sent me. Ah, hello at mtgm. I have two other pods. I have to remember too many emails. I've got my own personal email. It's a loss.

[Joanne McNally]

Oh, I'm sorry, V. I'm sorry that you're too busy with your other podcast. This is your main podcast. This is your bread, tato and butter.

[Grace Campbell]

Darling. Darling. Of course, darling.

[Joanne McNally]

Hello. That's a real Spano thing. [e-mail] Sam.