Episode Overview
Podcast: My Therapist Ghosted Me
Episode: MTGM EXTRA! "My ex still niggles at me..."
Hosts: Vogue Williams & Joanne McNally
Date: September 24, 2025
This bonus episode brings Vogue and Joanne together for their trademark candid banter, veering through topics from dental disasters and kitchen gadgets to the long tail of heartbreak. The main theme emerges from a listener dilemma: why an ex who cheated can still haunt your thoughts—even when happiness has seemingly moved on. The pair unpack the emotions, sprinkle in therapy jokes, and offer real, unfiltered advice with their usual humor.
Laughter and Life Updates
Dental Drama & Tattoos
- Joanne starts off bemoaning a hole in her tooth, imagining a gold filling for style.
- “Whole gold tooth. Just get rid of the tooth. Go whole gold.” — Joanne, 00:47
- She also reveals she's genuinely getting a tattoo:
- “I'm getting a little cherub angel... and she has a little martini glass.” — Joanne, 01:14
- Vogue is supportive in her own way:
- “I just don't stand in your way anymore. You know what you are, who you are, and I love you for it.” — Vogue, 01:54
Alternative Fashion & Body Image
- They joke about body modifications and alternative piercings, with Vogue admitting a mild fear of stretched ear lobes:
- “It scares me a tiny bit. I can't help the way I feel.” — Vogue, 02:26
- Both reflect (hilariously) on how “no one loves their nose.”
Nostalgia: University Days & Poverty Meals (04:02–06:50)
- The trio reminisce about college life and student food disasters.
- “College, you didn't know how good you had it because you'd nothing to do... no responsibilities. Now you know money. But it was wasted on them.” — Joanne, 04:02
- Joanne's classic: “2 minute instant noodles on white toast with Kerrygold... not a single nutrient to be seen in that meal.” — Joanne, 06:19
- Vogue and Joanne agree: "You can have a beige diet and be absolutely fine. Kids survive on beige." — (Paraphrased, 06:43)
Bizarre Birthday Planning (07:10–09:14)
- Vogue panics over her partner, Spencer, planning a huge, unwanted birthday party.
- “I'm having a nervous breakdown. I wanted 15 to 20 people... He's mentioned 70 to 100. What's happened here?” — Vogue, 07:10
- Joanne and Joe tease that the surprise might be excessive, and try to reassure her,
- “It's your 40th. Everyone's allowed to go above and beyond for their 40th.” — Joanne, 08:49
- Hilarity ensues over mixed idioms: “above and beard” / “above and aboard.”
Coffee Machines, Exes, and Awkward Dating (10:05–14:34)
- Joanne recounts an awful dating story and a “Barry” who relied on her—and his friends—for meals, prioritized his Sage coffee machine, and ghosted her unceremoniously.
- “He left me sitting in the restaurant... I saw the silhouette of him packing a Sage coffee machine... and his father drove him off.” — Joanne, 11:14–11:58
- Vogue is more sympathetic to Barry’s coffee obsession than his character.
- “I’d leave my mother on the side of the road for a Sage.” — Vogue, 12:08
- The trio marvel at the absurd prices for fancy coffee machines.
- “You can spend two grand on one of those.” — Joe, 13:55
Listener Letter: "My Ex Still Niggles at Me..." (17:42–24:14)
[17:42] Letter Read & Context
A listener writes about ongoing anger towards an ex who cheated on her years ago, despite being happily in a new relationship.
Major Points & Discussion
1. Lingering Resentment Isn’t Longing
- Vogue assures her: “I don't think you're hung up on him... you're just still really pissed off that he did that to you. And that's totally fine.” (20:55)
- Both hosts reveal similar feelings about their own exes’ bad behavior.
2. The Unavoidable “What Ifs” and Lack of Closure
- Joanne relates: “I was in a relationship... he cheated pretty regularly... There was never any repercussions for him for it.” (21:01)
- She regrets giving too much and seeking friendship even after multiple betrayals.
3. Desire for ‘Cosmic Justice’
- Vogue: “You kind of want everyone to know that they're a wanker... but at the end of the day... that’s who they are.” (21:41)
- Joanne: “A leopard never changes its spots... if he does it with you, he does it to you, he'll do it on you.” (21:56)
4. Do You Need Therapy for Exes?
- Both advocate therapy but frame it as an ongoing self-care tool, not necessarily a “cure” for remembering hurt.
- “Why don't you just get therapy anyway? I love getting a bit of therapy.” — Vogue, 23:21
- “Therapy is always the answer.” — Joanne, 23:27
5. Closure: Sometimes You Have to Give it to Yourself
- Joanne: “Sometimes you have to close it for yourself... They're never going to give it to me. I need to just do this myself now.” (24:32–24:41)
Notable Quotes and Advice
- “If there's hangovers of this stuff, it just sits with you, it stays with you. Like, I dream about loads of my exes.” — Joanne, 23:04
- “Thank God you got someone new and sound. That’s it... it’s not like he’s had a complete lobotomy. That’s who he is.” — Vogue, 23:12
- “Dún an doras”—Let’s close the door (in Irish). — Vogue & Joanne, 24:43–24:55
Running Gags & Memorable Moments
- The “Sage” coffee machine obsession, with both genuine admiration and parody of how pointless fancy gadgets can be (10:05 and throughout).
- Joanne’s parade of awkward Barry stories (duolingo at dinner, Nando’s date, etc.), culminating in, “I didn’t even know Barry had pockets because he never put his hand in them.” (13:14)
- Language learning and passive-aggressive duolingo streaks as the episode closes (24:55+).
Key Takeaways
- It’s normal to feel bruised by betrayal years later, even in a new, happy relationship. Lingering thoughts don’t mean you want your ex back.
- Therapy helps—if only to process residual annoyance, but sometimes closure is a DIY project.
- It’s not about the ex “winning” or “losing”—they’re just living out who they are.
- Humor, friendship, and a touch of self-compassion are effective salves for old wounds.
If you’re still stewing over an ex, you’re in good company. Whether it’s a sage coffee machine or closing your own mental doors—sometimes you have to let go and have a laugh... or at least a podcast chat about it.