MTGM EXTRA! "Questioning my sexuality..."

Summary

My Therapist Ghosted Me – MTGM EXTRA! "Questioning my sexuality..."

Hosts: Vogue Williams & Joanne McNally
Date: November 19, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this lively bonus episode, Vogue Williams and Joanne McNally dive into listener dilemmas with their signature irreverence and candour. The central question comes from a gay male listener who is happily in a relationship but experiencing new, intense sexual urges toward women. With classic MTGM humour, Vogue and Joanne dissect the complexities of sexual identity, fleeting desires, societal expectations, and the absurd rules people try to enforce on others – all while sharing personal anecdotes about everything from ADHD to dead badgers and their own bizarre dreams.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Technical Troubles & ADHD Anecdotes

• Joanne arrives dishevelled and admits forgetting both her microphone and headphones, blaming her ADHD diagnosis (00:42).
• “I’ve ADHD. Now I’m disabled. Nothing is my fault anymore. I’m disabled in the mind. It’s official.” – Joanne (00:44)
• The two banter about the distractions and life-management chaos that comes with such diagnoses, setting a tone of self-aware humour.

2. Nightlife, Shows, & Living Disasters

• Joanne recounts being on “the lash” after a show, losing her hotel key, and waking up with last night’s makeup smeared (01:43).
• “Joanne’s like, right up close to the camera. She has last night’s makeup on. Definitely hasn’t put a brush through the hair yet. Eyes are very red…” – Vogue (02:03)

3. Relationships, Rumours, & Public Scrutiny

• Vogue discusses gossip columns and the public’s obsession with her marriage to Spencer, including false rumours about their imminent breakup due to spending time apart (05:44).
• The duo note double standards in how working mothers are judged compared to men, and call out “faux feminism” that women propagate against each other (07:06).
• “You can be a working mom and also be a great mom. There should be no shade around that.” – Vogue (07:50)

4. Listener Dilemma: Questioning Sexuality

• Main Segment Start: (10:36)
• A listener email details a gay man, happily coupled but experiencing sexual dreams and urges about women—prompting confusion and guilt.
• “I feel there’s a part of me that’s urging to explore my sexuality again… I feel dirty and even guilty…” – Listener’s email (14:31)

Reactions & Personal Reflections

• Both hosts immediately normalize sexual curiosity, dreams, and changing attractions.
• Personal Stories: Joanne jokes about her own strange dreams (e.g., about Gemma Collins), and Vogue about massaging a male friend—emphasizing how dreams need not dictate real-life action (13:27).
• Joanne candidly congratulates the listener’s libido: “I am genuinely envious of this guy who wants to ride everyone! I think this is fantastic, honestly.” (15:02)

Advice & Takeaways

• The hosts stress that fleeting desires or dreams don’t automatically define one's identity, and guilt over thoughts is unnecessary.
• They suggest waiting a few months; if the feelings persist, consider next steps—but not to act outside the boundaries of one’s relationship (16:08).
• Joanne, with characteristic bluntness: “Women are hot. Scratch that itch. I’m so jealous you even have an itch to scratch.” (16:08)
• Both note that many people, including “straight” men, experience hidden or fluid desires, debunking rigid identity categories (16:33).

5. Sexual Fluidity & Modern Labels

• “The beauty of modern life is there are no boxes anymore. There’s no lanes. Do what you want.” – Joanne (17:07)
• Listeners are encouraged to embrace the spectrum of sexual identity and resist external pressure to fit into binary definitions.

6. Irreverent Banter and Closing Bits

• The show wraps up with additional playful disclosures about sexual curiosity, including a playful interrogation of producer Joe about “tucking” (17:55).
• Joanne jokes about her practical approach to relationships: “I wanted a rich fella. I don’t care if he’s impotent. So I’ll fold it in like an origami master.” (18:51)

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Notable Quotes and Moments

• On the relentless expectations of women:
  “It’s like you can only be one thing… and the worst part about it is it’s usually women saying it.” – Vogue (07:38)
• On curiosity vs. guilt:
  “I think that’s completely normal…like, it’s difficult for you not to maybe give it a go, but if you’re in a relationship, I wouldn’t suggest doing that.” – Vogue (15:42)
• On sexual identity:
  “There are no boxes anymore. There’s no lanes. Do what you want.” – Joanne (17:07)
• On libido envy:
  “I am dead from the waist down at the moment… I need to have my genitals resuscitated at this point.” – Joanne (15:02)
• On folding it in:
  “So I’ll fold it in like an origami master.” – Joanne (18:51)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• ADHD & Technical Chaos – 00:42
• Night Out/Lost Keys – 01:43
• Relationship Rumours & Double Standards – 05:44
• Listener Question (Sexuality) – 10:36
• Advice & Discussion on Sexual Identity – 13:27 – 16:33
• No Boxes in Modern Life / Fluidity – 17:07
• “Tucking” Banter and Outro – 17:55 – 19:09

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Tone & Language

Honest, self-deprecating, and joyfully unfiltered, the hosts expertly balance compassion with comedic irreverence. Their advice is unqualified but warm, leaning on lived experience and the philosophy that curiosity—and laughter—are always healthy.

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For fans and newcomers alike, this episode offers a funny, frank exploration of sexual identity and societal nonsense, anchored by supportive friendship and permission to be gloriously imperfect.

Transcript

[A]

This is a Global Player original podcast.

[B]

Hello, and welcome to the bonus episode of My Therapist Ghosted Me with me Vogue Williams. I'm with the most forgetful woman in all of the land. Not just Ireland, England, maybe the whole world, Joanne McNally.

[C]

And North America.

[B]

I would say every continent. I would say, yeah. If so, we are. We. We really have to not talk over each other today because Joanne has not only no mic, but also she thought today. Do you know what it. I'm not going to take headphones either. So we have no mic and no headphones.

[C]

I've adhd. Now I'm disabled. Nothing is my fault anymore. I'm disabled in the mind. It's official. I can't even be blamed for this. It's just part of my condition, Joe. Okay.

[A]

In which case I apologized. I apologize to you.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

You don't have your microphone.

[C]

Thank you. And you too should be delighted. I'm here for diversity, frankly, which we are.

[B]

We are with Joe. We're bullying. She's gonna go to Global HR and say, those two are bullying me because of my condition.

[A]

I'm sacked. I'm gone.

[C]

The worst thing to happen to me was that psychiatrist giving me a diagnosis. I've never leaned on anything more.

[B]

I think you. I think you gotten worse since she started the meds. I think the meds are actually making her worse.

[C]

Well, no, because I don't take the meds. This is my. I take them.

[B]

She loses the prescription.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all that jazz. I mean, it's classic. Yes, yes. I've no Mike and no everyone. But I'm. But I'm here and that's the main thing. Okay.

[B]

We're surprised you're here, to be honest with you. I know you were on the absolute lash last night after your first show in Dublin.

[C]

I was. I. I'm. I'm. I'm in the Leinster Hotel, and we came back last night, and there. Well, I don't know. I lost count. The tiny, fancy martinis, which is basically just pure booze.

[B]

Yeah. I'll describe the scene here for you. Joanne's, like, right up close to the camera. She has last night's makeup on. Definitely hasn't put a brush through the hair yet. Eyes are very red. Still got some of the salmon stuff.

[A]

Out of the hotel room just before the record that she was. Yeah. Because she'd lost her hotel key.

[C]

Yeah. And. And why. Why did all those things happen to me?

[B]

That's a great saying for Joanne. You're your own worst enemy, Joe. Isn't it Suits her perfectly.

[A]

Disconnected there for a bit because the Internet is also. You have adhd, Joanne, and it means it's not your fault.

[C]

Thank you, thank you, thank you. What is my fault? I'm no longer accountable for anything. I'm due to go to Paris with a friend in December and she's a quick book.

[B]

I said, ross, forget it. I haven't been told.

[C]

I BDHC now. I. I can't be held.

[B]

I can't book anything.

[C]

So it's all up to you, Paul. Yeah, it's great.

[B]

I'm delighted. An unusual choice for you. I don't. I don't know.

[C]

He wants to have the Euro tunnel thing. I was like, I'm telling you now, it doesn't go under the sea. I found that out the hard way. But whatever.

[B]

It does go into the sea.

[C]

Sorry.

[B]

It does, it's.

[C]

Sorry. Yeah, it does. But you can't see. You can't see the octopuses around like that. I said that to him. But anyway, he's determined.

[B]

I mean, it would be kind of dark and dangerous. Come here to me. Spenny started a challenge today. He went and swam in the Thames for an hour and a half this morning at 6am and I was thinking, imagine what's lurking in there. Like, oh, there's just. Probably full. Just dead animals. Badgers. I once saw a badger in. In the Thames and like, it was along the canal. So, like, I used to go for a walk along the canal every day there for about six weeks and it just kept getting more and more bl until I assume it burst one day and I just never saw it again.

[C]

Sorry, what, you saw a badger explode?

[B]

So I. No, I used to walk Winnie over when I lived by Victoria Park.

[C]

Break this down to me.

[B]

I lived by a canal and I used to walk Winnie along the canal and one day I spotted something in the canal. I was like, what the is that? A dead badger obviously had fallen in and succumbed to the water. And the dead badger. Yes. And for weeks and weeks and weeks.

[C]

I walked forward that story. You said he was.

[B]

But he's hardly alive.

[C]

I have to say, I find this pivot in Spencer's character and life attractive. Watch yourself, folk. I have adhd. I could do anything.

[B]

If you're desperate. Because he has a two. He got diagnosed. He has it too. Can you imagine the two of them living together?

[C]

The trauma bond would be out of control.

[B]

Can I stay, though? I'd like to still be there and we can just take like.

[C]

Oh, that would be A perfect union house. Cuz it's certainly not going to be.

[B]

Us in the house.

[C]

Yeah. And raise the kids and all. So the marriage won't last long, if that's any consolation. Trust me.

[B]

Well, that's what everyone said about mine and Spence. And eight years in, we're still going strong.

[C]

Did they say that? People are so mean, aren't they?

[B]

I heard one recently that I was just this. This. Well, it was actually. I don't know, it might go in the papers today. I'm not sure because we just. Basically, they give you a right to respond sometimes. And like, like so we do. And so we're like, well, that's complete. So the story was. It might come out today. I'm not sure if that. Because it's so ridiculous. I'm not sure if it will. The story was that we are our friends. A friend, a source, a friend of the couple said. And I know it was you, Joanne, you dirty bitch. Said that? Spencer said that. Spen. I don't remember.

[A]

But yeah, go on.

[C]

What do I say?

[B]

Spencer and Vogue are headed for a breakup because they're spending so much time apart. And I could only assume it was because he wasn't in my content for Africa and because he came up on the, on the Saturday. But I'm like. And maybe it's because he's going away as well on, on his thing for three weeks. But I'm like, can we not spend like any time apart? Do we have to be sewn together now that we're to show that we're a united front?

[C]

Like, I'll say this. Firstly, the clickbaity. The, the, the. The thirst for clickbait is. I, I was only looking. I was, I was gonna post it. And then I was like, joanne, I think you are still a little tipsy from last night's. Don't. There was an article title is Lily Allen Most Mortifying Mother in the World? And I know. And it was all about like the fact that she's singing about book plugs. I was like, oh, I'm sorry. So female artists can't mind their life. Like, because you're a mother, suddenly you can't talk. You know, we, we're. We, me and you, about. We always have these conversations about what's acceptable, what's not. But my point is, if I read an article about you and Spencer breaking up, even though you're one of my best friends, and I have the inside scoop, I'd probably read it and be.

[B]

Like, oh my God, I know, I know. But I read. There's certain things that I read. I read something recently because there's been rumors flying around about me going places, and I read something and it's like, how could she go away and leave her? Like, I wonder, like, do men ever get that? Like, if I, like when, remember I went on tour with you and people were like, oh, how could she go away and leave her children? Because, like, I'm a human being outside of being a mother. Like, it doesn't mean that I can't go and do something that I want to do. You can be damn sure my kids are really well looked after. But, like, it's like, it's like you can only be one thing. And the worst part about it is it's usually women saying it. And I'm like, just don't say that because, like, we should be allowed go and work. And like, like, you don't need to concern yourself with how other people's children are. You, like, you can be a working mom and also be a great mom. And it's just. There should be no shade around that. It just annoys me. And I know something about Liliana and it's not. Not anything dark, but I know something to prove that she is a great mother who works. A great working mother. It's really Rand of me to say that, but, like, I just. I heard it. Yes. And I was like, that's so nice of her that she, like, they're always. It made me think they're always on the forefront of her mind. Wherever she's going, whatever she's doing, she's always making sure that they're there and happy and stuff like that. So back off.

[C]

Nothing pisses me off more than faux feminism. Fake feminism, and it's.

[B]

It's a real issue and fake and fake worry as well. It's like, I also read this thing yesterday and I nearly responded to it, and I was like, don't respond, because then it looks like it could. Then they'll know you've seen it because it was on an article I saw about me, but it was on Instagram. And I was. I looked at the comments and this girl was like, oh, I think, like, said one thing. And then she goes, but I really don't like her. And then someone else goes, why? Have you ever met her? And she goes, yeah, I have, actually. And I looked at her profile. I'm like, you've never met me. I've never seen you before in my life. You're full of. And I nearly wrote back, oh, really? When did we meet? Because I've never seen you before.

[C]

I think you should. You know, sometimes I'm like, let's up. We're very like, yeah, get involved.

[B]

I felt very Selena Gomez, you know, the way she sometimes does that. I was like, well, I do a Selena. Hello, I've never met you before.

[C]

Yeah, send me the deeds. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Can I have the details when? Yeah, Imagine she wrote back this perfect description. And I'd be like, oh, yes. I don't have a great memory.

[C]

Electric Picnic 2019. You're like, oh, it's you, her and the Coronas.

[B]

No one's their best self at Electric Picnic. That's all I'm gonna say. A hundred.

[C]

David Attenborough is alive.

[B]

Yeah. Joanne's just come on and told Joe and I he was dead because she got the news from Reddit.

[C]

Something came up in a Reddit thread and I still. I'm on. I'm. I'm on the edge and I. And if. David, if you're listening, I'm a big fan of you and animals, but I am. I feel like he's like the father. He's like the only kind of responsible one left. And I. And he's 99, and I guess I. I'm on. I'm kind of waiting, which is terrible. He could have another 20 years in him with science. Put them in a tube, keep them going, freeze them on Disney World.

[B]

Clone him. Clone him. He needs to be clowned. That's the only exception. There's an exception. And it's David Attenborough. Get it done.

[C]

That's such a good idea.

[B]

Yeah. Questions about my sexuality. Hi, Joanne. Vogue. And do you know what? I. I actually have never questioned mine, which I found, like, it's a bit boring.

[C]

Me and Vogue have a mutual friend and she told me I am the straightest woman she's ever met in her life. And she says sometimes I walk. She says, you don't walk like you're trying to attract men. You walk like you're trying to repel them. Yeah.

[B]

So, yeah, I think we are.

[C]

Turbo throat. Turbo.

[B]

Okay. Hi, Joanne, Vogue and Joe. I've been listening to your podcast for ages now and I've become obsessed with it. I recently started listening to through all the episodes again from the start. I would highly recommend to do this to all listeners. It's even more gas the second time around. I would hate to have to do that. I wouldn't like to know anything I've said in the past.

[C]

No accountability.

[B]

I can't even listen to us. So, like, I have to listen back to our pods and if I'm in any way in a bad mood, I'll listen to it and I'll just ring Louise. And I was like, are we. Do we sound like. Because I think that we're. And she's like, I think you're in a bad mood that I could start listening to it again. The next day, I'm like, okay, I wasn't about I love us again.

[C]

There's three times I've listened to this podcast. Back in all three times. It didn't work well. It didn't work out well for anyone involved, really. I talked. None of us enjoyed it directly about the edit. Yeah. So I've decided it's just better anyway.

[B]

Yeah. Okay. I am a gay man who's happily in a relationship. I love my boyfriend with all my heart. He's given me faith in men again after many decades. Yes, gay men are as bad as straight men, possibly worse. But my dilemma today is with my sexuality. Since puberty hit, I've been attracted to men. I hid my sexuality until I was 18 and I finally came out. Being from rural Ireland and a very Catholic family, this was a massive deal. The whole situation set me into a deep depression. Oh, God. Which still haunts me to this day. And I've had such intense shame over my sexuality for years. Oh, my family have been outstanding throughout all of this and are very welcoming to my now boyfriend. However, recently, I've been having intense urges to be with a woman. I have never so much as touched a fanny.

[C]

Fair play.

[B]

So I don't know where this has come from. Platinum gay. On nights out, I've always been approached by women and not men. As I get told, I come off as straight passing. And never in the past have I been tempted by getting off getting with any of the women that approach me. But now that's all changing. During the night, I'm having intense, vivid sex dreams about going down on a woman. I have always seen myself as a gay man, but I've been having such sexual urges towards women constantly. Now I really wouldn't want to go down on a woman. And I think all women are gorgeous, every part of you, but I just don't want to go down there.

[C]

Well, remember I had the dream that I was going down in Gemma Collins?

[B]

Well, I had that dream of a Brandon Courtney.

[C]

Did you see dreams you were going down to Brandon Courtney?

[B]

No, I wasn't going down on him, but I was massaging him in the bath.

[C]

Do you not remember? You're so frigid, folks. Just throw down on him, will you?

[B]

I think I saw him in his little budgie smokers when he was away on holidays with you and it got me going. I love when but I get a.

[C]

Call from Vogue and I just hear the splash. There's this gentle splashing and I'm like, are you ringing me from the bath again?

[B]

I ring people from the shower and they're like, why is it echoey? I'm like, oh, I'm in the shower.

[C]

Do you remember when, Winnie, when he was losing his mind, used to follow you into the shower to remember God love him. Oh, Winnie, I know you all wet and mad.

[B]

Okay, I feel intense guilt over this as I love my boyfriend so much, but I just feel there's a part of me that's urging to explore my sexuality again. I feel dirty and even guilty thinking about this as it feels like I'm cheating in my dreams and thoughts. Do you think it's a case of curiosity that's fueling this or is it some up Catholic guilt coming back to haunt me? Have you or Vogue ever had sex dreams about women or Joe about men? Love you and thank you for the two episodes of the POD every week. Genuine highlight. I. I think that's completely normal.

[C]

I'm jealous of your libido because I am dead from the ways down at the moment. I'd love to be dreaming about going down on anyone. To be honest, I need to have my like genitals resuscitated at this point. So I am genuinely envious of this guy. Who wants to ride everyone? I think this is fantastic, honestly. Well, why are you Everywhere, John?

[B]

On the 9th of December. On the 9th of December you'll be back to yourself.

[C]

Marcus. Marcus. I forgot about that date. Yeah, Marcus on the 9th.

[B]

Hopefully.

[C]

You never listen to a single episode of this podcast. All right, say I'll be getting a quick discreet cancellation.

[B]

Marcus has gone off. Yeah, I, I don't know. I think that that's completely normal and I think that you like, like, I mean, it's difficult for you not to maybe give it a go, but like if you're in a relationship, I wouldn't suggest doing that when you're in a relationship. But is it something that's going to go away? I'd give it a few months, see if it persists and then. And then see what you could do.

[C]

Women are hot. Scratch that itch.

[B]

Women are hot. And they're so nice as well.

[C]

Scratch that itch. I'm so jealous. You even have an itch to scratch. Right, everyone, what's this lad's name?

[B]

Oh, he didn't give his name for obvious reasons. Christ, that sounded. Didn't it?

[C]

What?

[B]

Well, I said he didn't give his name for obvious reasons. That just sounded really.

[C]

Well, he's kind of. Probably because he's in a relationship, but honestly, also. I know, I know, I know. And Vogue, we share these friends. I know men living straight lives who are absolutely. By, yeah, you know what I mean? I know man who are identifying as a straight husband with children who are absolutely riding lads on the side 100. So of course it goes. It goes both ways. Yeah. Do you know what I mean?

[B]

I've even thought about that. Yeah, that is very true.

[C]

So true. And the beauty of modern life is there. There are no boxes anymore. There's no lanes. Do what you want. You know what I mean? I couldn't be more thrilled for this guy. What a journey he's about to go on.

[B]

Well, we hope that that journey goes well.

[C]

That's it.

[A]

DM me.

[C]

He's perfect for me. I want a straight game on as a partner. I think that would be a really good fit for me to very quickly.

[A]

Answer the part of the question that was directed at me. No, I haven't had dreams like that. But that's. That's just. That's just.

[B]

He just wanks off. Man in real life.

[A]

What?

[C]

You're not sleeping long enough.

[A]

I knew there was no way through that. Time for the end of the podcast.

[C]

You ever took. Kind of took it back, did you? Would you be. Do you ever tuck it in?

[A]

No. Never? Not no.

[B]

Never felt. You've never done that where you turned it into a vagina? You've never turned it into van China?

[C]

I think me and Vogue spill our guts on this thing. And you don't. You don't bring honesty or authenticity to this podcast.

[A]

All of what I've said is honest. And I try to be authentic as possible.

[C]

You've never tucked your penis in between your legs?

[A]

Well, probably at some point.

[B]

There you go. Baby knew it.

[A]

Yeah, I imagine that's probably.

[C]

Compare the lies, Job. Lies.

[A]

Fine. Oh, there we are.

[C]

I'd be felt if I'd seen this. I'd be. Filled it in left, right, and center just to see different where it looks.

[B]

Jesus, she's going to talk about her origami now. Folding it in. Jesus Christ. Remember that? When did you say that? She's like, I had to fold when.

[C]

I wanted a rich fella. I don't care if he's impotent. So I'll fold it in like an origami master.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Great memory, folks.

[A]

This has been a global player original production.