Podcast Summary: Nadie Sabe Nada | "Alces en celo dentro de un gimnasio"

Podcast: Nadie Sabe Nada (SER Podcast)
Hosts: Andreu Buenafuente & Berto Romero
Episode Date: November 6, 2021
Episode Theme: Improvisation, humor, and audience interaction, centering on the unpredictable, the mundane, and the absurd, with special attention to everyday anecdotes, listener stories, and surreal observations—highlighted this time by digressions about cars, gifts, gym locker rooms, and the meaning of random details.

Overview

In this episode, Andreu and Berto deliver their signature mix of witty banter, improvisational sketches, and audience-driven Q&A, all under the unifying principle that "nobody knows anything." The show wanders from riffs on radio clichés and linguistic quirks, to the tragicomedy of auto repair and the peculiarities of gym locker rooms. This episode stands out for its energetic musical improvisations, a memorable digression on locker-room etiquette, and a special listener contribution involving real-life postal mysteries and the shipping of animal feces.

1. The Art of (Not) Knowing: Radio Clichés and Absurd Intros (00:07–03:06)

• Andreu and Berto reflect on radio as "the sound of our lives," playfully mocking the platitudes and fake warmth common to broadcast intros.
• Quote:
  • “La radio hace compañía, la radio es uno más de la familia. La radio es el sonido de nuestra vida.”
    — Andreu Buenafuente (00:56)
• Play with pronunciation and linguistic quirks: omitting vowels or adding extra letters for comic effect—"bienvenidos a la radi," "balona con."

2. Everyday Calamities: Car Troubles and Street Art (03:16–06:14)

• Berto tells a saga about his car: delayed repairs due to a crisis in auto part supplies, and his struggle with a stick-shift replacement car.
• The conversation veers into neighborhood stories: someone repeatedly keys cars in Berto’s neighborhood, making "works of art" out of scratches.
• Quote:
  • "No vamos a dar su identidad porque no la conocemos, pero al que vamos a llamar un hijo de puta que se ve que se dedica a radiar coches."
    — Berto Romero (05:21)

3. Listener Gifts: The Return of 'Max' and the Samantistic Singing Bowl (06:15–09:35)

• Listener Max returns to the studio, giving the hosts a "cuenco samantístico" (singing bowl)—"mejor vivido, no usado."
• The hosts attempt (with comical incompetence) to make the bowl sing, leading to accusations that Max is a "Buddhist monk in another life."
• Quote:
  • “Hay que ponértelo en la mano, que toque lo mínimo posible, porque si no, no vibra.”
    — Max (08:14)

4. Improvised Minisong: Musical Madness and 'Hotmax' (09:35–11:02)

• The crew riffs musically about 'Hotmax,' culminating in increasingly free-form and wild improvisations, leading into the show's signature "sección de motor."

5. Section: 'Cagando Leches' and Listener Adventures (11:03–17:23)

• Playful, chaotic musical intros about car parts (crankshaft, "cigüeñal"), and toying with the musical/sonic identity of a "motor section."
• Listener story: Carlos and Noemí describe spending their honeymoon in the Panda Ride—a rally across Morocco using only old SEAT Pandas, a "roadbook," and compass (no GPS).
  • Berto and Andreu joke about what 500 old Pandas would look like driving through Morocco.
  • Listeners left "Samanthé para todos" stickers behind.
• Quote:
  • "Yo soy muy fan del señor que va al gimnasio... Nunca me he metido en el de chica. Eso es ilegal, no te lo permiten. Pero muy fan del señor entrado en kilos que está viviendo un momento de epifanía personal acojonante."
    — Andreu Buenafuente (37:09)

6. Absurd Observations: Car Makes, Gym Special, and Social Rituals (17:32–21:43)

• Comics puzzle over the brand “MAN” on trucks and buses, humorously misunderstanding logistics and mechanics.
• Sudden transition: Listener question about why people walk so slowly in gym locker rooms, leading to an impromptu “Especial gimnasios” full of quirky and vivid gym imagery.

7. Gym Locker Rooms: Social Nudity, Human Anatomy, and Existential Musings (36:05–44:08)

• Andreu and Berto poke fun at behaviors in male gym locker rooms: disoriented naked wandering ("como Terminator"), slow motion exhibitionism, and the bewildering interior architecture of men's bodies.
• Hilarious commentary on body types, personal grooming trends (hairless genitals), and philosophical reflections on why body hair might exist as an evolutionary camouflage for "the curtain rod" of male anatomy.
• Quote:
  • “El pelo, quieras que no, es un embellecedor... Si tú quitas todo ese pelo, entonces ves la tramoya, ves como la grapa y ves la caída de la cortina y es muy curioso de ver.”
    — Berto Romero (43:28)

8. Miscellaneous Listener Q&A: Hashtags, Paying Peajes, Swiss Tastelessness (19:18–25:54)

• Short questions on:
  • Vomiting babies and what constitutes bad parenting (the answer: “por supuesto”).
  • If hashtags could run out like car license plates.
  • Former Catalonian highway tolls—now defunct—leading to mismanaged traffic, abandonment, and speculation that tolls might make a comeback.
• Gags about the pessimism of Catalan culture and the dark side of local character.

9. Musical Interlude: TV Credits and The Morning Show (29:22–30:46)

• Berto brings up the credits for "The Morning Show," referencing the music by Benjamin Clementine, subtly teasing Andreu for skipping TV intros.
• Quote:
  • "Escucho, veo los créditos."
    — Berto Romero (29:47)
  • "Benjamin Clementine. Es una pasada, es una bestia parda."
    — Andreu Buenafuente (30:50)

10. Language Trends: "En plan..." and Audience Linguistics (33:11–35:19)

• Live audience member Álvaro examined over his spontaneous overuse of “en plan” as a verbal tic ("me aparece como un ninja"), with the hosts playfully dissecting the phenomenon.
• Quote:
  • “En plan, cuando menos me lo espero, de repente la boca. Pues suelta la magia.”
    — Álvaro (34:44)

11. Listener Anecdotes: Nicknames and Lingual Mishaps (45:35–48:19)

• Timestamps:
  • [45:39] Dennis (Bolivia) tells a story about being nicknamed "Gordo" at school—even after someone larger arrived, the new guy was "Dennis al cubo."
  • [47:16] Cristina (Madrid) recalls telling her teacher she was "enmimismada" instead of "ensimismada," causing confusion and accidental wordplay.

12. Segment: Postal Mysteries with Max – "Una mierda para ti" (49:00–52:28)

• Max shares the wildest thing he’s seen at Correos: discovering that people actually pay a company to anonymously ship animal feces (‘heces’)—including a "premium" elephant version in a pastry box—to others for revenge.
• Quote:
  • "Resulta que hay una empresa que distribuye heces. En plan para gente que quiere putear a otro y le envía heces de caballo, de perro..."
    — Max (51:24)
  • "La de elefante iba en una caja de ensaimadas."
    — Andreu Buenafuente (52:21)

13. Samanthé Section & Philosophical Closure (53:22–54:54)

• Samanthé (their signature improvisational mantra of good vibes) is extended to all—after Berto interrupts the peace by killing a bug on Andreu’s microphone, leading to farcical philosophical regret about taking life in a moment of seeking inner peace.
• Quote:
  • "¿A ti te parece que en una sección que se llama Samanthé, que es pura espiritualidad, tienes que matar un ser vivo, por mucho asco que te dé?"
    — Berto Romero (53:50)
  • "Que el Samanté se derrame sobre vuestros rostros."
    — Berto Romero (54:51)

Memorable Quotes & Moments

• "Yo no me la puedo ver, disfrutad vosotros." – On the logic of gym nudity. (39:42)
• "Eso es un pony por detrás. Sin cola larga." – On unfortunate gym locker-room views. (41:07)
• "Una empresa que distribuye heces de caballo, elefante... la de elefante es la premium." (51:24)
• "La creatividad se usa mucho para hacer daño." (46:53)
• "Escucho, veo los créditos." – Berto's commitment to enjoying TV openings. (29:47)

Noteworthy Segments (Timestamps)

• [00:56] Radio clichés and language games
• [05:21] Berto's saga of car vandalism artistry
• [08:14] Max teaches the “cuenco samantístico”
• [11:03] Start of 'Cagando Leches' motor-section improvisation
• [14:02] Listener honeymoon in the Panda Ride
• [36:05] Why people meander naked in gym locker rooms
• [41:07] Disconcerting anatomy: the truth about hairless "points of attachment"
• [45:39] Listener Dennis's story about school nicknames
• [51:24] Max’s tale of mailing poop

Style and Tone

Consistently irreverent, quick-witted, self-referential, and absurdist. Andreu and Berto frequently break the fourth wall, deliver meta-commentary on the show's structure, and play with both high and low-brow humor. The rapport between the hosts and spontaneous interactions with the audience lend a warm, participatory feeling, blending sharp observations with affectionate teasing and surreal flights of fancy.

Summary

This episode is a quintessential "Nadie Sabe Nada" installment—electric with improvisation, crowd energy, and the joy of following jokes and digressions wherever they lead. It’s a relentless, hilarious parade of word games, memory lane strolls, and unexpected philosophical insight about human behavior, whether in the streets, the postal service, or the all-revealing gym locker room. Samanthé for all.