NearlyParents Podcast

Episode: Jamie and Sophie have PHONE S*X!

Released: September 28, 2025

Hosts: Jamie Laing & Sophie Habboo
Producer: JamPot Productions

Episode Overview

In this riotous, refreshingly honest episode of NearlyParents, Jamie and Sophie dive into the warts-and-all realities of pregnancy, relationship quirks, and impending parenthood. The pair brings their trademark blend of humor, candor, and oversharing as they explore topics ranging from bodily changes and emotional rollercoasters to the often-awkward transition from married life to (almost) parents.

Expect plenty of laughs, relatable gripes about pregnancy symptoms, frank sex talk (and a hilarious "phone sex" roleplay), surprising admissions, and fan-favorite listener stories.

Key Topics & Highlights

1. Embarrassing-but-Normal Things

[02:12-06:13]

Jamie and Sophie kick off with a playful roundup of things that are weirdly embarrassing but shouldn't be:

• Starting a run in public: Jamie confesses he feels silly starting to jog while people are watching.
• Lowering into a bath and getting up at buffets: Both agree these moments feel awkward for no real reason.
• Eating alone in public: Sophie finds it mortifying to eat alone at airports; Jamie, by contrast, loves solo cinema trips.
• Drinking hot tea and reacting: Jamie, “When you're drinking a tea and you go, 'Oh, that's hot.'” Sophie: "That is embarrassing. And it should be embarrassing." (05:02)

“Me running in general is highly embarrassing. I don’t quite know how to run.”
— Sophie [03:33]

2. Hairgate: Jamie’s Hair Dye Disaster

[06:13–07:14]

Sophie is not a fan of Jamie's recent hair dye job, likening him to "Draco Malfoy" and "Boris Johnson." She laments his broken promises not to dye again.

• Sophie jokingly threatens that their baby will cry at first sight of Jamie's hair.
• Jamie remains unrepentant.
• Sophie: “Are you never going to be natural?… You’re always forever going to beach blonde your hair and dye it this awful, awful shade of straw.” [06:14]

“I hope the baby does grab hold of your hair and pulls out strand by strand of that straw-like hair.”
— Sophie [06:14]

3. TMI Pregnancy Body Chat

[07:23–16:06]

The couple chronicles the physical toll pregnancy is taking on Sophie, including:

• Overheating: Sophie, previously always cold, now "roasting" and sweating at the slightest exertion.
• Constipation: Sophie admits she's infamously constipated (“I haven't been in five days… Everything's very cramped at the moment.” [08:13]), and Jamie is sheepish for not noticing sooner.
• Sleeplessness & body aches: Sophie is now getting just under 5 hours of sleep a night, constantly needing to pee and physically uncomfortable.
• Pregnancy weirdness: Jamie discovers new things every day—from swelling hands/feet to random pains—and marvels at how little gets discussed from the partner's POV.

“I'm like averaging five hours sleep max. It's a real nightmare.”
— Sophie [13:24]

4. Relationship Strain & Hilarity

[09:20–12:05]

• Stress & First Baby Nerves: Jamie admits to tiredness but not stress, while Sophie highlights frequent hospital visits out of anxiety over baby movements.

• Nightclub Misadventures: Jamie recalls their night out at a club, where a very pregnant Sophie became the center of attention.

  • “Guys, it was like I was an avatar… I am so embarrassed. I need to leave immediately.” — Sophie [10:59]

• Jamie’s Epic Shepherd’s Pie Binge: The couple mock-fight over proportions eaten. Sophie's pregnancy craves Jamie's "favorite food" — shepherd’s pie.

5. Baby Knowledge Pop Quiz

[16:22–17:36]

Sophie quizzes Jamie on practical baby care, with hilarious results:

• How to hold a newborn: Jamie falters then recovers—“You hold protecting its neck because it can’t hold its head up.”
• How to check a baby’s temperature: “Use a thermometer.”
• Care of nails: Jamie insists, “You don’t cut baby’s nails.” Sophie and a guest correct him—yes, you do, and they need baby mittens to avoid self-scratching.

"That's wild. I didn't know that about baby mittens."
— Jamie [17:36]

6. “Dictionary Corner”: Pregnancy Lingo

[18:04–19:33]

Sophie introduces gross/fascinating medical terms:

• Dysgeusia: Metallic/sour taste due to pregnancy hormones.
• Leukorrhea: Thin, milky, odorless vaginal discharge (totally normal).
• Both hosts share stories, laugh, and cringe over TMI details.

7. Born-Again Virgins & Sex Life Real Talk

[20:30–22:05; 33:03–39:11]

• Both declare themselves “born again virgins”—none of the usual drive:

  • Jamie: “I don’t really even think about sex. I don’t think about it.” [20:36]
  • Sophie: “So am I. I’m a born again virgin.”

• Hilarious riffing on post-baby sex, awkwardness to come, and Sophie picturing Jamie as a “snowman with a white toupee.”

  • Sophie: “It will be [awkward now] because I’m going to picture you as a snowman.” [21:42]

8. Listener Messages

[25:22–30:05]

A fan-favorite section delivering the best of listener oversharing:

• Photo Booth Disaster: Anonymous shares that their family friend “got his penis out” in a wedding photo booth—photos were distributed to all (“He’s now known as ‘needle dick’.” [26:54]).
• Twin Mayhem: Daisy’s twins escaped their nappies and “finger painted” with their poo.
• LGBTQ+ Parenthood Journey: Ruan and Jovan share their emotional surrogacy and IVF path—after heartbreak, they're finally pregnant.
  • Sophie, tearing up: “The hormones. I’m so happy for them.” [30:02]

9. Celebrity Anecdotes

[31:09–32:35]

The couple shares stories about nearly having Lewis Capaldi perform at their wedding, and Sophie’s fangirl moment with Eva Longoria on Instagram.

10. Hot or Not: Sex-Adjacent Game

[33:03–39:11]

Jamie invents a “Hot or Not” game with sex-adjacent activities and gets Sophie’s verdict:

• Jamie cooking in oven gloves: Hot (“...if only to see you cook for once!” [33:36])

• Eating snacks off Sophie's tummy: Not (“Not at all not.” [33:48])

• Toe sucking: No-go. Sophie: “I would be sick if someone tried to suck my toe.” [34:13]

• Role-play voice notes: Rejected—Sophie pushes Jamie to do a Lewis Capaldi impression instead.

• Phone sex roleplay:

  • Jamie insists, Sophie resists; eventually play it out, with Jamie in Alaska and Sophie stonewalling his advances—deadpan, dry, and hilarious.
  • Jamie: “Hey, how are you? ...A little bit lonely in Alaska.”
  • Sophie: “Why are you in Alaska?”
  • Jamie: “You know, I’m here to save the seals.”
  • Sophie: “I’m watching Vampire Diaries.”
  • (36:05–36:51)

• Maternity nude photoshoots, nudes, and fantasy roleplay: Sophie says she'd be “20 out of 10” for sex if Jamie wore a Paul Wesley (Vampire Diaries) prosthetic (“Just being honest.” [37:37]).

11. Pregnancy Tip of the Week

[38:13–38:45]

From a listener: Lift your belly while peeing to get more urine out (“I will take that tip and I will run to the bathroom and lift my belly.” — Sophie [38:40]).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Everything is cramped at the moment.” — Sophie [08:13]
• “Family sized shepherd’s pie… as big as my torso!” — Jamie [12:27]
• “That’s wild. I didn’t know that about baby mittens.” — Jamie [17:36]
• “I’m actually a born again virgin.” — Jamie [20:32]
• “It’s going to be awkward the first time we have sex… I’m going to picture you as a snowman.” — Sophie [21:42]
• “You would have sex with me if I got prosthetics of Paul Wesley from Vampire Diaries stuck onto my head?”
  “Yes.” — Jamie & Sophie [37:54]
• “I would be sick if someone tried to suck my toe.” — Sophie [34:13]
• “Watching you walk around… everyone just staring at you going like, ‘Oh, my God.’ They were just fascinated that you were there with the baby.” — Jamie [11:43]
• [On photo booth penis exposure]: “He wasn’t blessed by the penis gods… he’s now known as needle dick.” — Listener message [26:54]
• “Send us pictures!” — Sophie, celebrating listener’s successful surrogacy [30:05]

The Episode’s Tone & Style

• Hilarious, intimate, and self-deprecating
• Expect playful bickering, honest (sometimes brutal) marital banter, and unapologetic oversharing.
• Warm, inviting, deeply relatable for anyone going through pregnancy, relationship transitions, or just loving a good laugh.

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 02:12 — Chat about embarrassment & weird social anxieties
• 06:13 — Jamie’s hair dye drama
• 07:23 — The realities of pregnancy symptoms
• 09:20 — Pregnancy stress & first baby nerves
• 12:05 — The Shepherd’s Pie saga
• 16:22 — Jamie’s Babycare 101 pop quiz
• 18:04 — Dictionary Corner: Pregnancy lingo
• 20:30 — “Born again virgin” sex talk
• 25:22 — Listener messages (wedding photo booth, twins’ disaster, surrogacy triumph)
• 31:09 — Celebrity encounters & wedding anecdotes
• 33:03 — “Hot or Not” (phone sex, roleplay, nudes, and more)
• 38:13 — Pregnancy tip of the week

For New Listeners

If you’re looking for a real, honest—and often hysterical—take on love, marriage, pregnancy, and the anticipation (and terror) of becoming a parent, this episode is for you. Jamie and Sophie’s chemistry, openness, and willingness to bare all (sometimes literally) make for a podcast that feels like hanging out with hilarious friends who say what everyone else is thinking.

Listener participation is warmly encouraged—send in your wild, embarrassing, or heartwarming stories for a chance to feature in future episodes.

Follow @NearlyParentsPodcast or email nearlyparents@jampotproductions.co.uk to join the conversation!