Can I Touch You? | Episode 327

Summary

Podcast Summary: New Rory & MAL – "Can I Touch You?" | Episode 327

Release Date: December 17, 2024

In Episode 327 of New Rory & MAL, hosts Rory Farrell and Jamil "Mal" Clay delve into a mix of personal anecdotes, lively discussions on music and pop culture, and timely social issues. Joined by co-hosts Damaris and Julian, the episode offers a blend of humor, insightful commentary, and candid conversations. Below is a detailed breakdown of the episode's key segments.

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1. Holiday Season Antics (00:00 – 04:00)

The episode kicks off with Rory reflecting on the holiday spirit. He shares a humorous account of taking his daughter, Amara, to see Santa Claus, highlighting the challenges of managing children's reactions in festive settings.

Notable Quote:

• Rory (00:20): "I almost lit a fire just in the middle of nothing like Frank Sinatra."

2. Santa Claus Visit: Chaos and Comedy (04:00 – 10:00)

Rory recounts the ordeal of waiting in line to take a photo with Santa. Amara's unanticipated outbursts and the antics of other children turn the experience into a comedic event. The hosts laugh over the absurdity of children fighting for attention in traditionally wholesome environments.

Notable Quote:

• Mal (02:04): "Is that a weird fucking man screaming?"

3. Recent Live Show at Gramercy Theater (10:00 – 16:00)

Shifting gears, Rory and Mal discuss their recent performance at the Gramercy Theater in New York City. They share stories about interactions with fans, including a memorable meet-and-greet where a fan humorously mentions a "strongest knees award."

Notable Quote:

• Rory (04:21): "He said strongest knees award. Something about the whole Drake."

4. Feature Segment: Youngest Fan and Musical Snippets (16:00 – 31:00)

The hosts introduce a recurring segment where they spotlight the youngest person in the crowd during their shows. They highlight Michael, a 24-year-old from the Marcy Projects, and play snippets of songs relevant to his city. The interaction reveals interesting dynamics about generational and cultural understandings of music.

Notable Quote:

• Mal (09:37): "He said Busta Rhymes environment, which..."
• Rory (10:10): "All I do is win definitely is there. But..."

5. Music Analysis: Miami Get Up Anthems (31:00 – 56:00)

Transitioning to music, Rory and Mal critique Billboard's curated list of Miami's top get-up anthems. They debate the inclusion and ranking of classic Miami tracks, expressing strong opinions on which songs truly capture the city's vibrant culture.

Notable Quotes:

• Mal (46:17): "That's right, Rory. Today we are speaking about Tres genado Siones, Tequila and Billboard teaming up..."
• Rory (47:07): "I don't want to take away from city girls. Act up. Like, I can see it being in the top 10..."

6. Discussion on Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre’s New Album (56:00 – 64:00)

The hosts express their initial skepticism towards the new collaboration between Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre. However, after listening, Rory admits he was pleasantly surprised by the album's quality, praising its production and lyrical content.

Notable Quote:

• Rory (55:01): "It’s really, really good, man. It’s, like, oddly good."

7. Controversy: Jay Z Allegations and Racial Dynamics (64:00 – 88:00)

A heated discussion unfolds around allegations against Jay Z, where Rory presents factual inconsistencies in the accuser's story. Mal emphasizes the importance of due process and criticizes the legal representation handling the case, advocating for a criminal rather than civil approach to such serious accusations.

Notable Quotes:

• Rory (24:03): "I found it kind of odd. Like, I get why people may not like Jay Z. That's their prerogative."
• Mal (26:17): "Anybody that heard this from the beginning knew that something just didn't sound right."

8. Friend’s Relationship with Cardi B and Offset: Group Chat Drama (88:00 – 111:00)

The conversation shifts to personal relationships within their friend circle, specifically involving Cardi B and Offset. The hosts dissect screenshots of group chat messages revealing tensions and controversies, blending humor with genuine concern over relationship dynamics.

Notable Quotes:

• Rory (32:31): "They were saying that. Like, what was wrong with that?"
• Mal (45:18): "What's wrong with seeing Denzel's monologue?"

9. TikTok’s Potential Shutdown: Impact on Influencers (111:00 – 142:00)

Addressing social media trends, Rory and Mal speculate on the rumored shutdown of TikTok in January 2025. They discuss the platform's influence on creators and ponder the future alternatives for viral content creators, highlighting the challenges influencers may face in adapting to new platforms.

Notable Quotes:

• Julian (62:16): "TikTok is life, man. But also we're laughing and joking."
• Mal (63:28): "We don't have to deal with TikTok anymore. It means nothing to me."

10. Barbershop Consent Issues: A Social Commentary (142:00 – 173:00)

In a critical segment, the hosts explore the awkwardness of consent-based interactions in barbershops, where barbers ask patrons, "Can I touch you?" They debate the implications of such practices, balancing respect for personal boundaries with the necessity of physical interaction in grooming professions.

Notable Quotes:

• Damaris (66:35): "They ask for permission. What if you say no to that?"
• Rory (66:46): "But when kids can communicate that, I totally agree."

11. Listener Voicemails: Navigating Relationship Challenges (173:00 – 215:00)

Engaging with their audience, Rory and Mal respond to voicemails from listeners facing relationship issues. They offer advice, share similar experiences, and maintain a supportive yet humorous tone while addressing concerns about partner interactions and personal boundaries.

Notable Quotes:

• Rory (85:43): "If you want be part of the crew, then let me do the kissing game with your man ass."
• Mal (116:00): "Man, he about to eat good in there, man."

12. Wrap-Up: Upcoming Events and Final Remarks (215:00 – End)

As the episode concludes, the hosts look forward to upcoming shows, particularly the Dreamville Fest, and encourage listeners to engage with their content on various platforms. They reiterate their commitment to providing entertaining and thought-provoking discussions.

Notable Quote:

• Mal (121:12): "All right, peace."

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Key Takeaways:

• Humorous Storytelling: Rory and Mal excel in sharing relatable and amusing personal stories, enhancing listener engagement.

• Music Critique: The hosts provide insightful and passionate discussions on music topics, particularly hip hop and regional anthems.

• Social Commentary: Addressing current social issues, such as consent in professional settings and the impact of viral platforms like TikTok.

• Listener Interaction: Actively engaging with listeners through voicemails, offering advice and creating a community feel.

• Dynamic Chemistry: The interplay between Rory, Mal, Damaris, and Julian showcases a dynamic and entertaining group dynamic.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Rory (00:20): "I almost lit a fire just in the middle of nothing like Frank Sinatra."

• Mal (02:04): "Is that a weird fucking man screaming?"

• Rory (04:21): "He said strongest knees award. Something about the whole Drake."

• Mal (09:37): "He said Busta Rhymes environment, which..."

• Julian (62:16): "TikTok is life, man. But also we're laughing and joking."

• Damaris (66:35): "They ask for permission. What if you say no to that?"

• Rory (85:43): "If you want be part of the crew, then let me do the kissing game with your man ass."

• Mal (116:00): "Man, he about to eat good in there, man."

This episode of New Rory & MAL offers a blend of humor, insightful discussions, and candid conversations, making it a must-listen for fans seeking both entertainment and thoughtful commentary.

Transcript

[Rory]

No worrying, Mom See now you know.

[Mal]

Who the God be back running the city and you know who the squad be Flip mo bitch, look, see, ain't nothing changed. No, I'm back with the remix with the Queens of the Game when you see me in the spot, you better respect it Y'all already knowing my rap Ain't no reason to check it and y'all know that you ain't with me.

[Rory]

Just for the record, superstate, I'm a.

[Mal]

Let Mary J. Blige come and set it.

[Rory]

We are back. Top of the week, middle of December. Holiday season. Holiday season Cheer is around. Walked in today and Pee was listening to Frank Sinatra's best Christmas album or whatever. I was in the spirit. I almost lit a fire just in the middle of nothing like Frank Sinatra.

[Mal]

To get you in the holiday, Holiday mood. Thank you for that.

[Damaris]

Thought I heard some child drums on that record.

[Rory]

I mean, you know, think so. Ahead of his time, some of them in there. Frank. Frank's son can confirm.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Rory]

Frank Sinatra Jr Jr but that's why I enjoy getting here early with Peach. Because him and I both love holiday spirit. Like, we're the only two that like Thanksgiving in this room. Like, we just like white holiday shit. So I love that he's deejaying.

[Mal]

You think that y'all are only. So what do you think the coincidence.

[Rory]

That you would be? We're celebrating love American holidays.

[Mal]

White Jesus Christ, for some reason, you and Peej are the only ones that loved American holidays.

[Rory]

Listen, a son was born in Bethlehem.

[Mal]

Yeah, I get it. I understand. Thank you guys for bringing the Caucasian energy into the workplace.

[Rory]

You're welcome.

[Mal]

Thank you. Appreciate it.

[Rory]

In the Middle East.

[Mal]

Yes, yes.

[Rory]

White eyes, blonde hair. Was beautiful.

[Mal]

Beautiful time. What a time.

[Rory]

Shepherds came.

[Mal]

Exactly.

[Rory]

You know, they were. They were denied. They were denied a hotel room because, you know, racism.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Rory]

We had a rough man.

[Mal]

I get it.

[Rory]

Look what they did to our Lord.

[Mal]

I empathize with you.

[Rory]

But thank God we all know it is a fact Jesus Christ was born on December 25. So I love to celebrate that by, you know, looking at a Santa buying presents. Yeah. Materialism.

[Mal]

Yes.

[Rory]

You know, because the shepherds brought a gift. So now let's all go straight into corporate America. But anyways, I took Amara to go see Santa yesterday.

[Mal]

Was she scared? Did she cry?

[Rory]

She was cool. Like, she was patient in the line. Which, by the way, it's just when you have a kid, they just fold you right in to the sheep. Like, I'm just part of the Herd now.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Why am I waiting an hour to go take a photo with some guy that my daughter doesn't even want to.

[Damaris]

A local drunk.

[Rory]

Like, what am I doing? Why do I feel like I need to do this type of stuff? Yeah, she was cool in line, and then the moment we got, like, right up to Santa, she just started losing her shit. Like every kid in front of us.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's what's supposed to happen. Who is this weird fucking man screaming?

[Rory]

The photos came out hilarious.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Cause she's just yelling at the top of her lungs, so it was kind of worth it. Like, once I got the prince, I was like, no, this is hilarious.

[Mal]

This is great.

[Damaris]

This is still traditional white Santa. Or do they, like, try to throw in the fucking? Okay.

[Mal]

Santa had dreads.

[Damaris]

I do these days. I don't know. They just. Anything Santa, they don't even call him. It's just. They.

[Mal]

Yeah, it's a.

[Rory]

It's a.

[Mal]

We don't know if Santa identified as a black man or not.

[Rory]

It's a weird job if you think about it. I'm not even going to go down the path. You guys think I'm going to go as far as a guy that dresses up like Santa Claus and has kids sit on his lap? Tell the guy it's just a really odd. No, I was much easier than that. No presents were given. Just the, just the president of trauma. I just like, you have to be a weird guy to want to be that Santa. Like all kids do is scream in your face for hours on end in a mall. Like you would want. Like, how much money would it probably get?

[Damaris]

Like 4 or 500 bucks.

[Rory]

Is that worth it?

[Damaris]

I would imagine it's like a gas.

[Rory]

You're gonna be sick no matter what.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

He even, like, I could tell he was just running out of things to say to the kid because Amara had a chicken finger in her hand. He's like, you brought me lunch. I was like, relax. Come on, let's, let's, let's be professional here. Just ask what the fuck she wants for Christmas.

[Mal]

Take the picture. Let's get out of here.

[Rory]

Let's. Come on. I've been in line for an hour across from Lids.

[Mal]

It's worth it, though, to get that picture of your daughter crying like that, to show her as she gets older. Like, that's worth it, you know?

[Rory]

And then we went to Cheesecake Factory. It was a perfect white, middle aged, December experience.

[Mal]

That's a Sunday for you right there.

[Rory]

Absolutely.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

I had a latte.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's a Sunday. That's a dad Sunday right there.

[Rory]

Yeah. Some Cajun pasta at 11am it was a rough Sunday, to say the least.

[Damaris]

Hugging the porcelain again after that, but.

[Rory]

It was still fun. We had a show on Saturday night.

[Mal]

We did. Thank you to everybody that came out to the last show of 2024 at Gramercy Theater in New York City. Had a great time, saw some familiar faces. Yes.

[Rory]

A lot of people from Patreon, Discord. That was fun. Yes, Meet and greet was fun. Per usual.

[Mal]

Yes.

[Rory]

It popped off a little weird. I was kind of nervous. The first person that started to meet and greet, I felt, like, crossed the line a little bit.

[Mal]

A little bit.

[Rory]

But I was trying to play.

[Mal]

He don't know how close he came.

[Rory]

Because, you know, I don't play about you and what happened. This guy, you could tell he was nervous and probably had been drinking a little bit.

[Mal]

Yeah, he was cool.

[Rory]

We had a little conversation.

[Mal]

He was a little drunk, a little awkward, you know. You know how that goes.

[Rory]

Full conversation was cool, y'all, let's take some photos, whatever. Regular meet and greet stuff. And then as he's leaving, he's like, oh, there was one thing that I like, meant to tell you more. Like, you have, like, the knees Awards.

[Mal]

No. He said he was gonna bring me a plaque. And I was like. He said he forgot he was gonna bring me a gift. I was like, oh, okay. He tried to bait you. I was like. He was like, yeah, it was a plaque. I was like, plaque. I was like, who gives me a plaque? A plaque for what? He says strongest knees award. Something about the whole Drake.

[Damaris]

Yeah, no, I get that lazy shit. That's a good joke.

[Mal]

So I looked at him and I was like. In that moment, I was like, oh, I'm a mature older guy now.

[Damaris]

If he just gave you a pair of knees.

[Mal]

Cause five years ago, I would have slapped this dude at the meet and greet. You know what I'm saying? I was like, oh. So I looked at him. I was like, thanks, man.

[Rory]

I had like.

[Mal]

You know what I mean?

[Julian]

You handled that well.

[Mal]

Thanks, man. Like five years ago. Oh, my God. Rory would have been mad.

[Rory]

No, drag me back to the dressing room. No, I would have joined now, not five years ago. I felt all the Irish rage in me immediately. Then I saw you take it in stride. So I was like, he didn't say it to me. I can't be the guy that now gets upset. If Maul's fine with it, then fuck it.

[Mal]

I take it all in stride, man.

[Rory]

But Other than that, the show was great. Damaris ex girlfriend was front row.

[Julian]

Taylor.

[Rory]

Taylor.

[Mal]

Shout out to Taylor, man had the.

[Rory]

Tight jeans on with the straps.

[Mal]

You could see the prank. She was strap ready. She had the strap ready.

[Damaris]

Was it rigid?

[Mal]

It was rid. It was veiny.

[Damaris]

It was rid for her pleasure.

[Julian]

It was Vaney.

[Mal]

Yes.

[Julian]

Okay.

[Rory]

But yeah, it was a lot of the familiar faces in the front row. So it was like, you know, we do this every December. Girl is like a family union.

[Mal]

All the girls from Discord that hate me were.

[Damaris]

There was mad.

[Julian]

You gotta stop saying that they hate you just because they critique you. They.

[Mal]

They told me they hate me to my face.

[Rory]

They did say that to they, like, I even went on space.

[Mal]

One of them told me I support all kind of. I was like, that's great seeing.

[Rory]

Where. Where was I during that?

[Mal]

In the spaces. Who.

[Rory]

Wait, what do you support?

[Mal]

Trump.

[Rory]

Oh, well, yeah, that checks out. Never mind. She has a point.

[Mal]

He's a.

[Rory]

It does check out. All right, moving forward. So we've been doing this segment, I think, like, the last three or four shows, where we try to find, like, the youngest person in the crowd and place, like, quick snippets of songs from that city. See, like, the history of music. It always turns out to be a very, very fun segment because young people don't know shit. And per usual, just like in Atlanta, we found the one young kid that came with his parent, Michael, who was amazing, came on stage. I talked to Michael in spaces last night. He gave me more info that had we fucking known that the whole show would have went different. So Michael was there with his mom and his mom. We kept asking, like, yo, there's a guy in between you and your mom. Like, are you gonna acknowledge. Is that your dad? No, no, no. Just ignored it. But we pushed forward. He didn't even know his mom was going to the show. That is her new boyfriend that she just met. He's a fan of the show. So he brought her on a date and he visited his mom that day and was like, yo, I'm out, like, about to go to the city. She's like, what are you gonna do? Go on new Rory Mall show. She's like, me too.

[Damaris]

Oh, wow.

[Rory]

That was his first time meeting her new boyfriend in the crowd.

[Julian]

Oh, my God.

[Rory]

When they sat down, had I known that mom and date would have came on fucking stage immediately.

[Damaris]

That's crazy.

[Mal]

Oh, no, we gotta go next week. Gramercy Theater. We're back. We gotta finish that. Are you kidd.

[Rory]

Yeah. So he went to the show by himself. He's just a fan. Whatever. And I guess mom's new boyfriend is a huge fan, too. And he was like, yo, I got these tickets. Like, you know, plenty of guys bring a girl drag that doesn't even listen to the show. And it happened to be his mom.

[Mal]

Look at us crossing demos. So we got the mother, her new boyfriend, and the son, see? And they say we don't touch the. Wow.

[Julian]

Now they got something to bond over.

[Rory]

I thought it was weird, too. Like, if I would have.

[Mal]

And I did say. I was like, yo, who is that? Because I remember saying, well, who is that? Cause where he was sitting. And then he was like, nah, that's my mom. I'm like, okay, there's a black man sitting right next to your mother. Like, who is his guy?

[Rory]

And now, in retrospect, do you see why he just quickly got off that topic?

[Mal]

Yes.

[Rory]

Cause he had just met the. He didn't even know that gentleman's name.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah. No, it's. Holy damn. I wish we would have known that on stage.

[Rory]

Yeah, but that was funny. He was great. He didn't know one fucking song from New York.

[Mal]

No, the craziest part about.

[Rory]

He was 24.

[Mal]

He was 24 years old. So that is the craziest part. That his mother was there on a date with a new boyfriend for the first time, and they all ended up going to the show. But he's from Marcy Projects, right? He's from Brooklyn. Marcy Projects. We asked him who his favorite rap is. He's from Marcy Projects.

[Damaris]

He's gonna say Jay Z.

[Mal]

He said busta rhyme.

[Damaris]

He's 20. He's 24. Oh, okay.

[Rory]

But he said bust around.

[Damaris]

That's weird. That's weird.

[Rory]

Like, if he would have said, like, rowdy, I would have been like, all right, you're 24.

[Mal]

Yeah, but like, one of the drillers, I'd have like, all right, cool. See, this is why I don't believe.

[Damaris]

I don't believe when kids say stuff like that.

[Julian]

No, because he could have just said Jay Z. He could have just said Jay Z.

[Mal]

She's from Marcy Projects.

[Rory]

After he got shamed by the whole crowd, he was like, no, it's Jay Z. I promise.

[Mal]

What? You from Marcy Projects and you say your favorite rapper is Busta Ron. First of all, to be 24 years old and say your favorite rap is Busta Ron, you're lying. It's crazy.

[Julian]

I don't think he's lying. Cause that's not a lie. You would come up with. I don't think he's lying.

[Rory]

No, what happened was on the spot.

[Mal]

He just thought about the first name. He said that was the first name that popped up.

[Damaris]

He was trying to play to the crowd.

[Mal]

That's what he said. He said that was the first name that popped in his mind was Busta Rhymes. And I looked at him like, what? Who says Busta Rhymes, like, is their favorite rapper?

[Damaris]

Because I've never heard nobody sing three Busta Rhymes songs. He would have folded.

[Rory]

Look at Me now. That would be his only.

[Damaris]

That was it. He would have literally said, look at me now.

[Mal]

Yo, have we ever. We've talked about hip hop for years. Have we ever heard anybody say Busta Rhymes is their favorite rapper ever? And Busta's a legend.

[Rory]

Probably. He deserves more credit. We do underrate.

[Mal]

No, we know Busta's a legend, but I'm just saying, I've never, anybody ever said he's my favorite rapper. No, I've never heard that was so like, that literally was the first time I ever heard that. Yeah.

[Rory]

Cause sometimes you get like weirdness, like hipster shit. Somebody went up there was like, yo, I love Kweli. Which is cool. I get it. I've heard that before.

[Mal]

I've heard that before.

[Rory]

Busta is kind of an interesting favorite rapper.

[Mal]

And to be 24 years old and say that. That's why I was like, really? Like, what?

[Rory]

He was probably Playboi Carti. He just didn't know what to say.

[Mal]

He could have said Playboy Cardi. That's my point. He could have just said Playboy Cardi.

[Rory]

And then we started out with Dipset Anthem as like the first snippet. He didn't know what it was.

[Mal]

His mother did, though.

[Rory]

Yes, she definitely did.

[Mal]

His mom knew the Dipset Anthem. Then we played Black Rob. Whoa. I think.

[Rory]

Yeah, but what I.

[Mal]

His mom was yelling whoa. On the hook. She was like, whoa. Looking at him like, you don't know this record.

[Damaris]

Yo, to a 24 year old kid.

[Rory]

That'S such a iconic song.

[Damaris]

He is 24.

[Mal]

If he said Bust a Rob, he.

[Damaris]

Wouldn'T know who was ro.

[Mal]

See, Damaris had a bad bitch of town.

[Rory]

She was woke like just when the chords out that song.

[Julian]

I just didn't know who. I didn't know who did this song. I know this song.

[Rory]

Just because you're 24 doesn't give you an excuse to not know.

[Mal]

Whoa.

[Rory]

Like, if somebody played me BDP Bridges over. I'm wasn't even born, but I would know it. Like, it's a iconic song.

[Mal]

Listen, he said Busta was his favorite rap at that point.

[Damaris]

He set himself up.

[Mal]

I would be surprised at anything. I'm thinking this guy's a hip hop historian at this point.

[Julian]

Hip hop historian.

[Mal]

What does it say?

[Julian]

Busta Is Busta from New York?

[Mal]

He from Brooklyn?

[Julian]

Yeah, he.

[Rory]

Michael was great, though. He was a good sport through all of it. I was really shaming Taylor. We played Dipset Anthem and everyone just shamed Michael for not knowing it. And then we thought Taylor had fucked mad bitches to Dipset Anthem. We put the mic in Taylor's face. She didn't even know Dipset Anthem.

[Damaris]

She put it down her pants.

[Mal]

She thought it was a dildo. She throws a new strap. Thank you.

[Damaris]

Here all day.

[Rory]

It's a DP night, but the show was great. Shout out to Bree, Steve. Shout out to Rome Streets. Derringer. They performed, which went great because sometimes it's awkward. I feel like with performers at live podcasts, it, like, actually worked. Yeah, I was. I was a little nervous because, you know, our. Our listeners are weird sometimes with energy.

[Mal]

No, it was good.

[Rory]

They can be assholes.

[Mal]

Yeah, it was good. Shout out to Rome Street's Derringer. Shout out to Derrick Gaines. Funny. Derrick Gaines. We gotta have him back on.

[Rory]

Yeah, Derek Gaines.

[Mal]

We gotta have. We gotta shoot an episode with Derrick Gaines, one of the comedians that I watched coming up in the city on the comedy scene. So it was good to see him at the. At the show that night as well. And your guy on. On. On.

[Rory]

My guy. Hawk. Yes, Hawk. Shout out to instruments. It was. It was a multimedia experience.

[Mal]

Yeah. Yeah. Had a good night. Had a really good night, man. Thank you for everybody that came out. Good to see y'all again once again this time of year. We'll see y'all soon.

[Rory]

Yeah, it was one of those. The December New York shows. I always have, like, actual fun. We have great shows that are fun, but I had, like, a really good time the entire time. Couples. We didn't break anyone up. It was a lot of love in the building. It was just a cool night.

[Mal]

It was a good night, man.

[Rory]

And I mean, we were getting the hangover after because we were in the same green room as Cole.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Yo, the night like you. Did you lick the seat?

[Rory]

I could smell his cologne.

[Damaris]

Roy went through the trash.

[Mal]

Yo, shut. Shut up, man. Shut. Just shut up. Don't say nothing. Just shut up. You didn't smell his cologne.

[Rory]

I walked in the green room when I got there, and Peej was already there, and I Was like, can you believe we're standing in the same place that JJ. Cole was 12 hours ago?

[Mal]

I'm so glad I wasn't there for that conversation.

[Rory]

Gramercy was playing nothing but cold when we got there.

[Mal]

For real.

[Rory]

Obviously on fucking repeat. And I mean, I wasn't mad at it, but I was like, you guys. All right, I get it. I get it. He was here and they were just disappointed with us.

[Mal]

So what was it, though?

[Rory]

The whole change between what they did with Cole the night before and then me and Peach trying to get soundcheck together. That front of house guy was probably one of the biggest assholes I've ever seen.

[Damaris]

Like the comedown off of Molly.

[Rory]

Like we asked just for like an auxiliary court. He was like, it's like, all right, man, all we need is an auction court was here yesterday and we're just a bunch of idiots with microphone.

[Damaris]

I understand he wanted to do a. Basically a warm up show because the last time he touched the stage was at Dreamville Fest. So he just wanted to, like, get his chops back.

[Mal]

Did he perform a boss after that?

[Damaris]

Yeah, like a full set. Oh, he did like two or three songs with us at the. Oh, yeah, the. He wanted to just do want.

[Mal]

Remember how to rap?

[Damaris]

Make a fan moment out of it too. It was like 600 people there.

[Rory]

I think that was really cool that that dream did that. That's a cool fan experience to watch. Like a rehearsal the day before. I thought that was a really good idea.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I would have gone to that. I fell asleep.

[Julian]

I was just mad Gramercy, like didn't like let y'all know that that was gonna happen.

[Rory]

I should have showed up like, damn the wrong night. But I'm here. Yeah, where's no. Where's my credentials?

[Mal]

Well, you didn't credential. The funny part is we were supposed.

[Rory]

To have a Showdown on that 13th year.

[Mal]

That's the funny thing.

[Damaris]

And so you're welcome to. Cool.

[Rory]

No, Cole did that despite more. I know what happened. Oh, I didn't even tell him all the behind the scenes shit. Yeah, I know.

[Mal]

He did a rehearsal show at the spot where we was. Okay. Yeah.

[Rory]

Pushed us to the 14th.

[Mal]

Pushed us. No, we had that. That was booked way before the battle started.

[Rory]

Maybe it was for Cole too. 10 year anniversary. Maybe he booked it nine years ago. You don't even know.

[Mal]

Thinking ahead, new is gonna be a full set. Foresight. Yeah, I get it.

[Rory]

But we will get our dream villains out of here as quick as we possibly can. They have a Huge night tonight. We are recording this on Monday. Julian and Damaris. Damaris is grabbing her titties.

[Damaris]

Doing that to love.

[Rory]

To love yours.

[Julian]

You love hip hop.

[Mal]

Oh, my God. I promise.

[Rory]

Pervy fucking line. But Big was young, so I guess he gets a pass. Grab your titties if you love hip hop.

[Mal]

Telling you, man, I'm just. I hope you guys have a great time at night. That's all.

[Julian]

Why are you like, damn.

[Damaris]

Why are you saying in that tone?

[Rory]

It kind of sound like we about to get jumped.

[Mal]

What tone do you want me to say then? I hope you guys have a great time tonight. I hope you enjoy the show. I hope Cole does great. I hope all of his fans have a wonderful moment tonight. Together in the same room and love hip hop.

[Rory]

All right, Damaris, just let him know.

[Mal]

I don't give a fuck what he doing.

[Rory]

It's celebrating a classic album. 10 years.

[Mal]

Great album.

[Rory]

It'll be a great night.

[Mal]

Great album.

[Rory]

Damaris was late today. Cause she was holding court at Irving Plaza for all the Cole fans. Like, oh, y'all don't have tickets yet. Lol. But let's talk about Cole.

[Damaris]

Demerica Lounge, I thought was like rude.

[Mal]

At Irvin Plaza.

[Rory]

Yeah, they did the first. The dollar in a dream thing. They announced a location to pick up your dollar.

[Mal]

That was today?

[Damaris]

Yeah, 2014. Tickets were available today for a dollar at Irving Plaza.

[Mal]

Damaris, she was online.

[Julian]

No, no, she got.

[Damaris]

No, she went to taunt the line.

[Rory]

She. Yeah, she was laughing like.

[Julian]

I did not.

[Damaris]

She said, look at you, brokies.

[Julian]

I did not. I was home, started quitting. But I would have been out there if I didn't have my plus one ticket. I would have been out there in the rain dancing with the fans.

[Rory]

But it has to be.

[Mal]

Should have went, man, and just played like Drake.

[Julian]

Never mind play the sidewalk.

[Mal]

No, I should just walk by just like with a speaker and just play like.

[Damaris]

What would you have played?

[Mal]

The apology speech? It's like playing a Dr. King. I had a dream, right? Yeah.

[Rory]

No, it's definitely the same exact thing.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Just let it go, man.

[Julian]

Look how fun that looks.

[Mal]

That looks so fun. I'm sure everybody smells like a wet dog.

[Rory]

I'm sure people have, like, minded conversations in line. And how long can it really take, though, if you're giving a dollar and getting a wristband? It's got to move quick, right? Yeah, I don't think that's.

[Julian]

But they were out there because. Well, this is the thing. Because if you have the inevitable site and you Paid for all of that stuff. You have the inevitable chat. Those die hard Coal fans guessed where that was way before it was announced. So there were people that were out there since like 8:00 in the morning. Eve announced at 9, 10. And the tickets didn't go on sale till 10:00.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

So if you're the 500th person in line at 8:00am like, you're going to be out there until like probably like 11 o'clock getting those tickets.

[Rory]

Listen, they were nice because when we were talking about this, y'all were predicting St. John's that would have been a fucking nightmare for everyone to go all the way out there.

[Julian]

Yeah, it awful.

[Rory]

Those buses would have been fucking packed. But I mean, I'm sure a lot of people would have came up robbing some suburban kids.

[Julian]

Yeah, I definitely would. I was going. I was going with like, I was gonna rob somebody for them cold tickets if I didn't get some. And I'm not saying that facetiously with.

[Rory]

Scissors and just cutting people's wristbands off. That would be hilarious.

[Julian]

Dead the ass. I was, I was, I was on that type of time. I was not missing this show.

[Rory]

Well, what. What's.

[Mal]

What?

[Rory]

Are you guys excited to see what record what cut some of the deep cuts? You.

[Julian]

We told you already. We told you on the Patreon. Shout out to the Patreon if you haven't seen it. Go.

[Damaris]

Really good episode today. But yesterday, if you're listening, go listen.

[Julian]

But yeah, get off my dick too.

[Damaris]

I'm more excited for the after party, to be honest. But you know, you know how I do them all photo ops.

[Julian]

You gotta do a line. It's Cole.

[Damaris]

A line. You think I'm just gonna do coke because of coal? Why would I do coke because of J. Cole?

[Julian]

Coke Cole.

[Rory]

Oh, yeah, it's not KL.

[Julian]

They next to each other in the Alphabet.

[Rory]

10 years. You've been sober for not 10 years.

[Damaris]

Not even close.

[Rory]

But you want to achieve that?

[Mal]

Well, a dollar from a dollar dream you use to roll up.

[Rory]

It's got a point.

[Mal]

And do a rail.

[Rory]

And you didn't have to pay a dollar, so you have a dollar now.

[Mal]

There you go, there you go. All 2014 tickets. Everybody had to do a bump when they went.

[Damaris]

That's like saying, smoke a dart. A dart in a rail. That's my version. A dart in a railroad. Just cripple your life.

[Mal]

A dollar in a rail, a dollar in a rail.

[Rory]

That's how you get into the weekend show.

[Mal]

That's how you go see Abel. He's going to see Abel tonight.

[Damaris]

Dollar in a rail.

[Julian]

Probably Bruno.

[Mal]

Dollar in a rail.

[Rory]

I'm going to pay for the stream because I do want to see the show. If I can stay up are Mall and I pause. Like, welcome to the afterparty.

[Damaris]

I'm going to ask you, do you think you should go to the after party?

[Rory]

Well, I gave my thoughts on Patreon. Why I'm not going tonight, which you can subscribe, but why I don't. I could blend in at the after party.

[Damaris]

Come pause. Like, you can come. I'm gonna go.

[Julian]

Don't come.

[Rory]

Why not? I've seen all those guys since.

[Damaris]

It's.

[Rory]

It's still love.

[Julian]

I was just.

[Rory]

I just. I didn't want to, you know, be at the show and ruin. Ruin the moment with my Mall energy.

[Mal]

What?

[Julian]

I feel like you could definitely still come to the after party. Don't come with us, but, like, come on.

[Rory]

Y'all own the pod too, though, so I don't understand, like, why if you're.

[Damaris]

Exempt, I'm not gonna ignore Rory if we're there. That'd be weird.

[Julian]

I've put my job on the line defending Cole this year. Okay? They can't say nothing to me.

[Rory]

Wait, your job on the line? You think we would fire you because you like J. Cole?

[Julian]

I was cussing out. I was screaming at Ma over Cole. Like, I was.

[Rory]

You think Mall had like a emergency conference? Like, yo, let's get on Zoom.

[Damaris]

Damaris has gone too far.

[Rory]

He's really into an elite rapper and it's odd. Nah, I was violating my job on the line.

[Julian]

Put my job on the line over this cold shit. Bugged out. I chose sides.

[Rory]

Well, I will say I know Mal has critiques. I have felt since post battle. Once the dust settled, Cole's team has been killing this rollout with the podcast with this 10 year anniversary show, all the stuff they're doing for fans, I think it's been great. I'm excited to see the show. I don't think he brings anyone out. I'd like to see him bring like 50 or someone out, but I think he may go double platinum. No features and just.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Does he bring Boss out?

[Damaris]

No, no, I don't think. I don't think anyone's coming. I think Boss is doing some live stream thing for the show tonight. Yesterday, if you're listening. At least that's what he said last we spoke, but. Yeah.

[Rory]

Gotcha.

[Damaris]

I don't know.

[Mal]

So Boss is not gonna be there?

[Damaris]

No, we'll all be there. I just think he's gonna be in charge of some, like, live stream component.

[Mal]

Oh, I'm about to say boss ain't gonna be there.

[Damaris]

Like, if on behalf of Dreamville, it's like BO stream or something like that. I don't know.

[Julian]

Oh, that'll be cool. Shout out to, like, the show from, like, our perspective, more or less.

[Damaris]

Yeah, that's cool.

[Rory]

Some commentary.

[Mal]

Shout out to Cole, shout out to E. Shout out the whole Dreamville team. That's a big night for them, man. Selling out the garden.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Anytime a rapper could do that, that's. That's always big. So shout out to them.

[Julian]

Speaking of the redemption of the Jays.

[Mal]

Mm.

[Rory]

Redemption. All right.

[Julian]

See, that was. Come on, Segue. Come on.

[Rory]

Also, by the way, before we get off J. Cole and go to Jay Z, I don't think my take. Even looking at the comments, I don't think my take of Jay Z going to Dreamville Fest as a popup is really as crazy as you guys made me. I think that's do. And come on. He doesn't. What he say? We don't go for victory. We come from victory.

[Julian]

Damn.

[Rory]

He is so bored. He wants to rap. I don't understand why he doesn't go in the booth. Every response he's had to this allegation has been nothing but reasonable doubt level bars.

[Julian]

I think he doesn't know if he can top his previous works. Maybe that's a thought. Like, what can I say that's so new or so refreshing? Like, what if I don't top it? I think that every artist who's had a long career considers that. No, I mean, he's not. He might not be in a rap state of mind. Like, I feel like once you get that old, I can't stand you. I can't stand Peach at Cardi B. I feel like once you become that big of a legend and you've said so much and you've been that amazing for so long, and now you're just in the house raising your family. What you need something to inspire you to rap. And I feel like nothing's inspiring him.

[Rory]

A fake rape charge is a crazy inspiration.

[Julian]

Yeah, like, that's what I'm like, nothing's really inspiring him.

[Rory]

Over the weekend, the alleged victim did an interview with NBC, I believe it was, where she suggested that her friend drove her from where? Rochester. Rochester, New York, five hours to this VMA after party where she was at 13 years old and small at Mall Stop. I'm telling mall. This is the facts of the case. Five hours down to the VMA afterparty dropped the 13 year old off there. Puff's limo driver said, yo, you got what Puff like? And she got in and then talked to a celebrity that said he was touring in the Midwest at the time and wasn't even there.

[Damaris]

Oh yeah, I saw that.

[Rory]

And her father then picked her up. Her father says I feel like I'd remember that. And she admitted there's a lot of inconsistencies in her story. Which then Jay Z asked the court system. I think it's okay and safe to throw this entire thing out. Nobody was vetted in this. Clearly she has her nights completely mixed up. I'm not suggesting that this woman has not been harmed, but it does not appear whatsoever that it was by Jay z after the VMAs when she was 13.

[Mal]

That was a good job breaking that down. Rory.

[Rory]

I was just giving the facts of the case.

[Mal]

No, that I love it.

[Rory]

I feel like I would remember driving 5 hours to pick up my 13 year old daughter in the city and driving back.

[Mal]

Listen man, we.

[Rory]

The father's response and I don't want to make light of this or any situation like this.

[Mal]

That's the comment I was waiting for. See that comment right there? Who's this?

[Damaris]

The top one, the baddest. Alive Ma.

[Mal]

No, the other one. So he paid her off because that's what they gonna say now. They gonna run to that?

[Rory]

No, he had the opportunity to pay her off.

[Mal]

No, but that's not. But this is stupid. See, the Internet is full of stupid people. And that's what people don't understand. A lot of people don't have discernment. A lot of people don't have common sense. Anybody that heard this from the beginning knew that something just didn't sound. Your father picked you up in the middle of a night from a random gas station and you allegedly was raped and sexually assaulted and your dad didn't go in that same venue you was just at and start raising hell.

[Rory]

And again, I don't want.

[Mal]

And I know people get assaulted and don't tell nobody. If you pick up your 13 year old daughter in the mid. Your 13 year old daughter in the middle of the night from a random ass gas station that's five hours away from your house. Yeah, you not gonna. What the fuck happened to you? What are you doing over here?

[Rory]

His response, 13 years old was like almost comical of. I have a lot going on right now, but I still feel like I remember that.

[Mal]

Yeah, like just cut this Shit, man, throw this bullshit ass case out.

[Julian]

And a autistic 13 year old fought off two grown ass men like, come on, man. And it wasn't fucked up enough that her dad didn't notice she got assaulted. Y'all called us abuse defenders or whatever the fuck y'all called us in the comments when we originally said that this sounded fucking.

[Mal]

Yeah, because those are the people that's just waiting for a moment to just believe any bullshit. To tear somebody down that's worked hard their entire career while they've sat down and worked for somebody their entire career. Oh, it's a difference. A lot of these people are online, they're waiting for that. People are waiting for a moment to laugh at somebody and say, oh, they're nasty. They're just like, if you got a picture with any of these other people that they think are nasty, oh, you was doing it too. What?

[Julian]

You got any pictures with nasty people?

[Mal]

Absolutely.

[Rory]

Sure.

[Mal]

I got pictures with niggas that done killed niggas. I ain't never killed nobody. Fuck that gotta do with me.

[Rory]

It's a weird comparison.

[Mal]

I'm just saying.

[Rory]

I get who you're taking it.

[Mal]

I'm just saying. So I'm a killer now because I. Because the nigga in the picture with me, he smoked two niggas three summers ago. The fuck that gotta do with me? I don't be with him every day.

[Rory]

Just into photography.

[Mal]

We happened to be at the same event, was standing there together, talking and somebody said, yo, take a flick. Let's take. Aight, cool. Once we left that venue, I don't know what that man did with his life. I have nothing to do with that. But the same can't be said when you're successful and have all of this fame and notoriety. People are waiting. They're waiting for that moment to laugh at you and to tear you down. That's just what this is. Another example. Cause now all of a sudden this week, oh yeah, no, he been raping. What? He been raping.

[Julian]

He been raping bitches.

[Mal]

We watched this man get in. He was in the elevator with his wife and his sister in law. She kicking him, you know, near his loins. You know, we got to protect the loins. Not one time did any of us think that Jay was going to hit Solange. So you mean to tell me this dude that had that cool in that elevator when he's being kicked and swung at didn't even look like he was about to swing? That's the same guy that held down a 13 year old girl and rape her? And raped her. That's the same guy. Like, come on, man, stop. Did he.

[Julian]

He held. He held the head? Did he held the legs?

[Rory]

Like, come on, make. Make.

[Julian]

Let's make it make fucking sense.

[Rory]

And, I mean, I get the side of people saying, this is why victims don't come out. Well, yeah, this is. None of this is consistent. It makes zero sense. And I think it's okay to say, hey, this makes zero sense. I don't know if we should put rape on someone's jacket when nothing is consistent in this story at all.

[Mal]

And not only that, it's sad because, you know, there are real victims of sexual assault in the world, and this is a spit in their face. Like, you don't play with that. You don't. This is not something to joke with and to just make accusations and think that, oh, it's okay if you're lying. We'll just find out you're lying, and then life will go, no, this is not something that. This lawyer. What's his name? Tony Busby. He should be disbarred. He should not be allowed to. To be a lawyer. He should not be allowed to practice law anywhere in the country.

[Julian]

Oh, y'all should see what he's doing now. Now he's like, well, this case was handed to us by some of our associates, and they did their due diligence, but they weren't aware of. Shut up.

[Mal]

No, they didn't.

[Rory]

I mean, it proves a hov calling him an ambulance chaser. You didn't vet anything. Somebody came to you or you heard someone say, yo, I know someone that says, jay did this. All right, let's do it. Let's do it.

[Mal]

Yeah, but he played with the wrong person, though. And he tried to put. He tried to put something on the wrong person's jacket that, you know, this is somebody whose moral compass has been intact since forever. You know what I mean? So to put that on his jacket, Tony Busby is his name. Oh, yeah. He's gonna play well. He's gonna learn a valuable lesson behind this. There's certain people you can't play like that with.

[Rory]

And I think the MeToo movement has been very valuable. And, yes, it's made the energy the past few years very sensitive, rightfully so. Cause there has been a lot of nasty shit. But it also allows people to take advantage of people that haven't done anything and be like, yo, I'll just settle just because I don't even want this coming out. I'm sure there's Plenty of people that have not committed a single act of sexual assault that have behind the scenes, settled with someone just so it didn't become a thing. Once that gets on your jacket, it's kind of over, no matter what the evidence really is. That's why I do respect HOV getting ahead of it 10 minutes after it came out, just to let everyone know this is fucking false.

[Mal]

Yeah, no, but that's the truth.

[Rory]

We're not gonna take time privately with our family.

[Mal]

Nah, fuck all that stuff.

[Rory]

I didn't do shit.

[Mal]

That's the difference. When you know you're not. You don't got none of this nasty, wild shit going on. You get right to it. Who? What? Oh, yeah, tell them. Yeah, let's hear it. No, make it. Make it a criminal case. Don't make it civil. Make it criminal. Let her. Who is this young lady? We need to know who she is so we can find justice for her. If she was indeed sexually assaulted. Yeah, that's how you handle that. You don't let lawyers talk and not give public statements. No, no, no, no, no. Let's handle this publicly. Let's get to the bottom of this.

[Rory]

And in fact, if it did actually happen and it wasn't Jay Z, let's.

[Mal]

Let's find out who did justice. Let's find out who did it.

[Rory]

But I had said over the weekend, which we talked about in the last episode, I found it kind of odd. Like, I get why people may not like Jay Z. That's their prerogative. Cool, whatever. But why are you upset that he didn't rape someone? Like, to me, that's the weird shit.

[Mal]

Because people are waiting for a moment.

[Rory]

Like, you're not at least relieved, like, oh, he didn't rape someone.

[Mal]

No, people want to see him fail. They want to see him, you know, have that moment in the spotlight where everything he worked for, his legacy, everything is destroyed. People are waiting for that. They want that moment. And that's just another. This is just another case of that. People want that moment. They think that you can't be young and black and successful and come from the ghetto. They don't think that you can make it out without doing some Illuminati ritual. Drinking baby's blood, raping children. That's the only way that you can, you know, achieve success in some people's eyes. So have fun with that case. Tony Busby.

[Rory]

Yeah, speaking of a non consensual, I don't want to be in Cardi B and Offset's group chat anymore. I didn't consent to this. Either get back together or leave me alone.

[Julian]

You definitely text a bitch before. Like, please, like, you look pretty. Like, can I hit it again? You definitely. You definitely text your ex back one last time.

[Mal]

That's crazy.

[Rory]

Please.

[Mal]

You.

[Rory]

I have never in my life texted a woman, please let me hit it again.

[Mal]

That is crazy. What did I have alluded to?

[Rory]

Like, hey, do you want to hang out tonight? With the intention that we should fuck again? But I didn't say please. Please let me hit it again.

[Mal]

Have some pride. Pride don't exist no more.

[Julian]

Not with your BAE mama shit.

[Mal]

That's where pride is the strongest.

[Rory]

The only way you can beg to hit it is if it's over. Like 90s R&B chords. You can't do it in text message. Acapella. Let me hit it again. And it's funny because Cardi texts just the way she talks too. You never get in this pussy again.

[Mal]

And I mean that.

[Julian]

And I mean that.

[Rory]

That's gotta hurt to read, though. You never get in this attacks.

[Damaris]

Like, he speaks too.

[Mal]

He's very. I want to fuck. Why are you being like that to me? You feel like you gonna be on me if you do, I want you.

[Damaris]

It sounds like the first draft of AI because we.

[Rory]

We've all been there.

[Mal]

The only thing I'm mad I don't see is the time that he sent those messages. Well, I wanna see how this conversation.

[Damaris]

Started at 11:05pm no, no, no, no, no.

[Mal]

I'm talking about his messages. How far apart are his messages?

[Julian]

Well, they can't be that far apart because it doesn't have another time scam. So it was probably within that hour.

[Damaris]

He's ratting, rattling those off.

[Rory]

No, because in.

[Mal]

That every 12 minutes is crazy because.

[Rory]

That'S at what, 11:55pm?

[Damaris]

11:05.

[Rory]

Yeah. So it was within the hour or we set a whole new day. Yeah, that was back to back. And again, we've all been to the place that we've accepted when relationships are over and we're never going to have that pussy again. It's just part of life. But reading it, I feel like would sting. I've never had a woman say that to me. I knew I was never going to get. Let's ask a real question. That would sting. Like. Let's ask a real question just to confirm. Lose all hope, you're never again.

[Mal]

All right, but let's ask a real question. Is Cardi gonna give him that pussy again?

[Damaris]

Probably.

[Mal]

Let's take. Let's make it. Where's the jaw. Let's make a bet. Let's make a bet. Let's make a bet.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

$100 a piece.

[Rory]

I don't want to put money on Cardi's pussy. No.

[Mal]

No money on her pussy.

[Rory]

I don't want to parlay her pussy.

[Mal]

They have a child. They have children together.

[Julian]

Over and over. What's the over and under?

[Rory]

But we have seen. Let's go with history.

[Mal]

Cardi ain't never given that.

[Rory]

Let's go with history.

[Mal]

He's never hit.

[Rory]

We have seen this before in public with them. And then we saw them. I think it was, like, last year, New Year's or some shit. They were together in the club, and then she admitted on IG Live, like, yeah, I fucked him again. Like, I want a dick. This is. It's happened before, fam.

[Mal]

Yeah, this was the last time.

[Julian]

I don't put it. I don't put a pass.

[Mal]

My sister.

[Rory]

Go back.

[Julian]

But where I think he might have fucked up is you had the whole entire Internet, you had podcast members screaming at each other, trying to figure out if I fucked somebody while I was pregnant or not. So you disrespected me in a way that's. Like you dragged it.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Julian]

Like you dragged it.

[Rory]

I'm gonna go against my gender. I feel like that was Offset's fault. The only reason why podcasters were screaming about it is because Offset told us.

[Julian]

That'S what's my point is you did all of that. You had these people yelling about me like you had these. Like you had. This was.

[Rory]

My.

[Julian]

People were saying that I fucked somebody while pregnant. Now it's. No, you fucked like you fucked up. She might be really turned off. Like, she might actually be turned off and over him.

[Damaris]

Well, they were seen together in Miami.

[Julian]

But they weren't together.

[Damaris]

All right. This thing keeps happening where they're not together, but they're always in the same club, and they're throwing money at each other in what looks like a playful man. So this is. This is flirting, I would say they.

[Julian]

Said this is their version.

[Damaris]

Clearly throwing money at her. She's returning the favor.

[Rory]

Good way or bad way?

[Julian]

She looks like she's throwing it back. Like, fuck out of here. But this was his birthday, if I'm not mistaken. And they said his entire birthday. He stood up in that corner and watched Cardi have fun with her friends, like, his whole birthday.

[Damaris]

They love each other. It's fucked up love, but they love each other.

[Rory]

I can see Offset, like, asking a promoter to book both of them, and then Happen to run into each other. Like, what am I supposed to do? Is work. Yeah, it's for our kids. I gotta do this.

[Mal]

All right. Now that I see this video. All right. Yeah, she definitely gonna get that. Some pussy. Hell, yeah.

[Rory]

Why?

[Damaris]

Oh, come on.

[Rory]

It's Cardi twerking at a strip club.

[Mal]

No, I could. I could tell when a woman is off a. Like, if she was really off that she would have left.

[Damaris]

She wouldn't be there.

[Julian]

You can't. Well, no, because if you get factually, Cardi's. Yeah, Cardi's not at a party because she's partying. Cardi's there because she's being paid to be there.

[Rory]

You think Cardi went to Rolling Loud? As a fan of music? No, she was there. Yeah, but she was there because she was getting paid.

[Mal]

But she knew. She knew he would be there too.

[Julian]

She might not have known that.

[Rory]

She said it was getting paid.

[Mal]

I guarantee. Yeah, she knew he was going to be there.

[Rory]

Okay. But to me, that would prove she just got. She's really off him.

[Mal]

She just got.

[Rory]

I don't even care if he's there.

[Mal]

She just got pretty and knew that she was looking good and walked up in there, knew that nigga was going to text her exactly what he texted. She knew that.

[Rory]

I think if she would have saw that he was on a build and didn't go, that would mean without sound, there's still. There's still a chance that they could get back together.

[Mal]

Bro, when a girlfriend.

[Rory]

That she'll show up because she does not give a fuck that you're there whatsoever. It won't affect her. That's when you know it's over. Over.

[Mal]

Nah, he gonna get that again.

[Rory]

It's when she's too emotional about it.

[Damaris]

Oh, there was more to this screenshot, by the way.

[Mal]

Of course there's more. Yeah, he.

[Julian]

I miss your. I miss your face. I miss your face. You make. When we.

[Damaris]

When she said.

[Julian]

She said, I don't feel like I'm gonna be on you. Y'all just don't deserve.

[Mal]

I got that same text, and she. The Uber was downstairs in an hour. I got that same text before they're gonna up.

[Julian]

That hit my heart. Yeah, that was.

[Damaris]

I. I tried to bring it up earlier, but, like, I don't want to throw Damaris under the bus, but yet here you are.

[Julian]

Bus is rolling.

[Damaris]

But like, wheels on the bus. You know, the Halloween thing. I'm never talking. Then here we go. Like, it happens. Yeah, but I'm not saying that's the Demerit specific. I'm just. People do that.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

But I feel like Damaris situation is not quite the same as what Cardi and Offset have been.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Through the last.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Also just like the public breakups.

[Julian]

Yeah. Like, that's.

[Rory]

That's a wild thing when you're in the public eye.

[Mal]

They made it public.

[Rory]

Of course.

[Julian]

That's why I said, yeah, he made it public.

[Damaris]

She.

[Rory]

These are screenshots that I'm in this group chat. I. I know way too much about them when I should, man.

[Mal]

They was. They was that night.

[Julian]

I don't think so.

[Mal]

I'm telling you, they was fucking that night. Guaranteed they was fucking that night. Only reason they wasn't fucking is if Cardi was on her monthly.

[Julian]

I really don't think Cardi gives a.

[Mal]

About that. I mean, well, Offset wouldn't have cared that night. He would have took that.

[Rory]

He said, I missed the face you make when we. He's definitely running that red light full speed.

[Mal]

All right, Cardi, man, just give that another shot, all right?

[Julian]

Why would you say that? No children.

[Mal]

No.

[Julian]

That's. No. You don't think that Cardi deserves to be loved? Somebody with somebody that doesn't cheat on her?

[Mal]

Absolutely.

[Rory]

Allegedly.

[Mal]

I agree. I agree with you there.

[Damaris]

Allegedly.

[Mal]

That don't mean that Offset didn't love her.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

We don't know the smear campaign that was put around.

[Mal]

Love ain't enough.

[Julian]

Love is not enough.

[Damaris]

No, it's not.

[Rory]

Mal, how would you feel? All right, let's say you being my man's. Text messages like this get leaked of me speaking that way. What would be the first conversation coming into this pod after you see me begging. Begging for the box?

[Mal]

Get your loins together, bro. Control your loins, fam. What's wrong with you? You all right?

[Rory]

I mean, but my loins was working. That's why I was after control. Yeah, but you gotta control them.

[Mal]

You gotta control them, though.

[Rory]

Nah, you can't go out. Not when I miss it like that.

[Mal]

Nah, man, you can't go out like that. Go home. I mean, they was at Miami.

[Damaris]

Yeah, you in Miami.

[Mal]

They selling pussy. It's the premium down here. They selling that pussy everywhere.

[Rory]

So instead of pussy plus, so instead.

[Mal]

All up and down Miami.

[Rory]

So instead of trying to win my family back through the art of fucking you, man, I still buy some pussy in Miami.

[Mal]

Yeah, them kids would be all right. You still take them to school, you still pick them up, you still see them. You still in their life.

[Rory]

I care about the nuclear family. Nah, but you Sometimes I gotta beg for that.

[Mal]

Nah, man, Pride. You gotta have some pride, man. You gotta have some pride. See, what he was supposed to do was have some bad bitches around him and throwing that money on them. That's what he was supposed. He was supposed to keep it pee like n. I see my baby mom. She good. She got security. She safe. All right, cool. I'm over here with the homies. We partying now.

[Rory]

I know my baby mother's going to get a lawsuit because Cardi's definitely knocking one of them chicks out without.

[Mal]

Because I'm partying at my birthday party.

[Rory]

You're adding logic into it. I don't know why you would do that.

[Mal]

Yeah, but I'm just saying, like, you can't come over. Guy has some pride. Let her look now. He look. Let her look crazy now. She. He look crazy with them text messages being put out there.

[Rory]

No, you would look crazy as a man if you're big.

[Mal]

If I'm partying at my recently.

[Rory]

Recently broken up. You guys just had a kid, what, how many months ago?

[Julian]

Like, four.

[Rory]

And you throwing money on a strippers.

[Mal]

At a strip club.

[Rory]

You were saying ones that were selling pussy, but.

[Mal]

Well, do you think strippers don't sell pussy?

[Rory]

Of course not. That's illegal.

[Mal]

Okay.

[Rory]

They would never do that. Yeah, come on. You still look nuts as you just had a kid with her. Don't throw money on bitches when she's mad at you. Next two seconds.

[Mal]

Yeah, like, what is he talking about? I'm at my birthday party.

[Damaris]

It's my birthday. It's my club.

[Mal]

Are we talking about.

[Damaris]

Just did a headline set, probably, or whatever. He was at Rolling Loud. Like, I'm going to do what I want to do.

[Mal]

I don't know if he was headlining Rolling.

[Damaris]

He probably was, but, like, he in that crowd. He plays well. Offset at Rolling Loud. That's a big.

[Rory]

Yeah. Off Offset did Rolling Loud and Quavo did 900,000 people in South Africa.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Oh, we. Is that on the docket? Because I can't wait.

[Julian]

Why?

[Mal]

I can't wait to laugh.

[Rory]

Congrats.

[Mal]

I can't.

[Rory]

Congrats to Qu for selling out the queen, man.

[Mal]

You niggas, man. Y'all niggas is crazy.

[Rory]

Why did you.

[Julian]

You know, he has no nuance when it comes to this conversation. Why did you bring it back up?

[Mal]

I have no nuance. Y'all niggas looked at me and said, he is on. He's the same level as Chris Brown.

[Rory]

Never said that. Congrats to Chris Brown. That's incredible.

[Mal]

You said they would. They would not tell him to move at a fashion show. You said they. If they walked in together, the fashion show would be more people there for Quavo than Chris Brown. You said that. And then Damaris doubled down on it.

[Rory]

You guys know that Playboi Cardi leaked a new song on stage.

[Damaris]

What?

[Mal]

Chris Brown sold 90,000 tickets in three minutes. Cool. I mean, could never do that.

[Damaris]

It goes Africa, like, once every five years. See?

[Mal]

You a hater, bro. You are a hater. He only does it once every. What does that mean?

[Damaris]

That means, like, yeah, like, if someone that's that big does something that infrequently in a country that loves him. Yeah, like, you can do that. You can sell 90,000.

[Mal]

Yo, you a hater.

[Damaris]

How's that hating? That's just.

[Mal]

Oh, here we go now. You don't think that's hating?

[Julian]

Because I don't think that Julian's coming from a hating place. If he did Africa, that was hate. If he.

[Mal]

I said he sold out 90,000. He was like, he only does it every three years. That's hate.

[Damaris]

Like, he doesn't go there. So to go there, you do the.

[Julian]

Massive arena in Miami. Because he doesn't do. He does Miami or whatever backflips in Miami every week.

[Rory]

That's why he couldn't do Miami.

[Mal]

Yo, y'all sound crazy.

[Julian]

He does the U.S. no, that doesn't sound crazy. When you do the USA more often, obviously in cities that you don't do more. Y'all do tours. Y'all know that y'all can.

[Mal]

Chris Brown could sell out any arena. That was my point that I was trying to make to y'all months ago. And y'all was trying to make. He needs this person to open up and sell tickets for him.

[Damaris]

What?

[Mal]

You said he needed a little baby on toe with him to sell those tickets?

[Damaris]

Well, he did.

[Rory]

I'm sure I said that.

[Mal]

Y'all look crazy. Y'all be disrespecting that kid, man. Well, that man. I'm sorry. He's not a kid.

[Rory]

I feel like we. We owe Rolling Loud Sunflowers. I think they're creating generational wealth. Every two weeks, Future Travis Scott and Playboi Cardi headline a huge festival.

[Damaris]

They're making.

[Rory]

Everyone on this lineup does it every other. It's bi weekly at this point. They are creating generational wealth for every one of these artists. Some of these artists never have to make music again because they can just do Rolling Loud three times a month.

[Damaris]

Oh, they had Shabuzi on the bill. That's cool. They did that's cool on Sunday.

[Rory]

Like, we. I. If I'm an artist, I'm inviting whoever started Rolling Loud to, like, my wedding, to, like, my kids christening. They are putting so much money into artists pockets. Like festivals typically happen once a fucking year with a crazy bill. They do this nonstop in every city with damn near the same lineup.

[Julian]

And kids keep going.

[Rory]

I know. I love it. Opposite of hate. I mean, I don't, you know, think Chris Brown would be able to make that. That lineup, but maybe one day if he gets there.

[Mal]

I hear you. That doesn't. You know me, like, why you think that? That's. That's. You're wrong. Just admit it. You was wrong.

[Rory]

Yeah, I've said that. You will never accept my apology. How many times?

[Mal]

Definitely say she was wrong. I never heard that. I never heard that, bro.

[Julian]

I. Whatever.

[Mal]

Say it again.

[Julian]

Because you don't shut the up.

[Mal]

Say it again. Say it again. Say you was wrong. Say you was wrong. Say you was wrong. Say you was wrong.

[Julian]

Nah.

[Mal]

Exactly.

[Rory]

It's like bitter. Baby. Mother. I've apologized. How many times?

[Mal]

I don't remember.

[Rory]

Stop bringing up the past. I've apologized. Let's move on.

[Julian]

I don't remember that we were wrong. We said that we were wrong.

[Mal]

I don't remember that.

[Julian]

But we didn't allow you to tell us what the we said. We said. That's not what we said. But what we did say was wrong. That's what we said the last time we had this.

[Mal]

You didn't say Chris Quavo was a household name or something like that.

[Julian]

Nobody said.

[Rory]

I understand that we've caused tension in this relationship. If you want to stay together, you have to get over this. I've apologized for it.

[Mal]

I think somebody. I think Demaris said, the Migos are a household name, just like Chris Brown is.

[Julian]

Nobody ever said that.

[Mal]

I think she said.

[Rory]

Just making things up.

[Mal]

Julian, can you pull a clip?

[Damaris]

I don't know what the original clip.

[Mal]

Yes.

[Rory]

All right. We only. Either way. Don't pull it up either way. Miami made so much money in the last two weeks between Art Basel and Rolling Loud. Art Basil's back. We didn't talk about that last episode. I felt like Art Basel took.

[Mal]

Never went away.

[Rory]

I know, but it didn't feel the same the last few years.

[Julian]

It felt like it went away.

[Rory]

Covid. I get whatever. This past year, the one that just everybody was there. It looked amazing. And then right into Rolling Loud. I feel like Miami residents shouldn't pay taxes for a while. You know how much money is now in Miami Just because the last two weeks. And speaking of Miami, Billboard put out their top 10 Miami anthems. We did. We've talked about Chicago so far.

[Mal]

Yep.

[Rory]

And we've talked about Atlanta so far. So they just announced Miami, which I think was great timing with Basil and with Rolling Loud.

[Mal]

That's right, Rory. Today we are speaking about Tres genado Siones, Tequila and Billboard teaming up with DJ Alex sensation and Trina. Some local Miami stars, the baddest. And they put together and curated a top 10 get up anthem for the city of Miami that speaks to the city and the culture of Miami. Some favorite songs that go off in Miami that we recognize a lot when we go to Miami.

[Rory]

And with Chicago and Atlanta, we agree with some, but we definitely had some notes. So let's go through this Miami one. We start at. There's a lot of ties here.

[Damaris]

There's 12 songs on this list, which.

[Rory]

Sometimes I get it, but to me it's a bit of a cop out, like make a decision. But I would never say that to Trina's face. So let me. Let me just go ahead and read what they have put together.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

At number 10, get low, flow rider. And at number 10 again, act up City girls. So far, I'm okay.

[Mal]

I don't know. I. I might. I might. Lean, get low. I'm just saying that that's a.

[Rory]

It was a classic.

[Mal]

It's a classic.

[Damaris]

One of the first times off memory that I had a girl grind on me was to get low.

[Mal]

There you go. See, you got low.

[Damaris]

Destroyed my clothing, you know, and like the. The address would just.

[Mal]

And you had a corduroy, so it was worse.

[Damaris]

Oh, it's bad. I break the up.

[Rory]

I don't want to take away from city girls. Act up. Like, I can see it being in the top 10, but I mean, I don't know, it's just so felt like it just happened. Give it some time to see if it. It lasts.

[Mal]

I mean, it's five years ago.

[Rory]

At number nine, shake what your mama gave you. JT Money.

[Mal]

Classic.

[Rory]

Yeah. By far. Also at number nine, mo. You can do this because you're Puerto Rican.

[Mal]

ESA Morena by DJ Lies. You don't know nothing about that.

[Rory]

I don't.

[Mal]

Yeah, see, that ain't. Yeah, that's not your field house right there, you know, but that's Bilando number eight. Classic.

[Rory]

Yeah, that.

[Mal]

Come on.

[Rory]

I know.

[Mal]

Classic.

[Rory]

I'm aware of that one. I can do number Seven. Because it's in English hustling by Rick Ross.

[Mal]

There you go.

[Rory]

Then number six, Maul. You have this one.

[Mal]

Gulo, Pitbull and Little Jar.

[Damaris]

That's a hit.

[Rory]

I feel like that. May that be higher.

[Mal]

It might need to be higher.

[Damaris]

That's a hit.

[Rory]

Number six. That's kind of crazy to put that at number six.

[Julian]

Look at number five, though.

[Mal]

Yeah, number five should be number one. I want to rock.

[Rory]

Uncle Luke, that could be number one in a fucking.

[Mal]

Let me explain something to y'all about I want to rock. All right, that right there. They've been twerking and shaking ass for 30 something years to that song.

[Rory]

Yeah, I could see that being number one. Number four. All I do is win. I want to go to the judges. DJ Khaled, Ludacris, T. Pain, Snoop Dogg, Rick Ross. The only person from Miami in this lineup is Rick Ross, not Khaled. Khalid's from New Orleans.

[Damaris]

He reps Miami hard.

[Mal]

Okay, he does.

[Rory]

But if that's the case, then I guess all I do is win should be there. But is that because of Khaled or Ross when it comes to the Miami thing?

[Mal]

I mean, it's a Khaled record, isn't it?

[Damaris]

Yeah, it is.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's Khaled.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

Khaled's been on Radio Miami for years.

[Rory]

Is All I Do is win the best Khaled song.

[Mal]

No. Well, not for me. No.

[Rory]

Anthem wise, I. All I do is win definitely is there. But even Rihanna and Bryson went fucking crazy.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Is that not considered Miami? If we're considering.

[Damaris]

What about we taking over?

[Rory]

We taking over was fire, but I feel like the Wayne remix was bigger than the actual song. But I guess all I do is win. I'm fine with that. With Khaled at number four. Number three, the baddest bitch. Pull over, Trina. I think that's totally fine. Even though she put the list together, it should be there. And then Mall can take one and two.

[Mal]

Number two.

[Rory]

Based off my complexion, especially number one. You're definitely not saying that shit.

[Mal]

You look like you can be from, you know, one of the islands. Conga, Gloria Estefan and the Miami Sound Machine. I don't even think you was born yet, Rory, when that was rocking. 1985.

[Rory]

I was born in 1990.

[Mal]

Yeah, he was. Ah, he's still in the sax. Number one. La Negra tiene tumbao a Celia Cruz. Y'all know nothing about that.

[Rory]

I still think Uncle Rook, Uncle Rook, Uncle Luke. I Want to Rock should be number one.

[Mal]

Nah, we gotta have Trick Daddy Nan, though. That ain't up there.

[Rory]

That is fucking crazy. Do you think that's because Trina and Trick Daddy have, like, rocky relationships?

[Mal]

I don't care what relationship they got.

[Rory]

The fact that Trick is not on this at all is insane.

[Julian]

Yeah, they should have been.

[Mal]

Ned gotta be on that top 10.

[Julian]

But that's not a get up anthem, though.

[Mal]

Put that song on a Miami watch.

[Julian]

While I'm gonna get my ass up.

[Mal]

This is why everybody gonna get their ass up.

[Julian]

I think they meant, like, hyperactive songs.

[Rory]

That's a hyperactive song.

[Julian]

Not really, man.

[Mal]

When Ned come on. All right, now, if you holding a drink, it's gonna be on the floor. Yeah, that's a fact.

[Rory]

I also think BMF could be on here. No.

[Damaris]

Ooh. Yeah. That's like forever.

[Rory]

That's kind of crazy. Yeah, like hustling. I understand, but I feel like BMF is the bigger Rick Ross record. If that comes on in Miami, BMF is doing bigger than hustling.

[Julian]

Well, I feel like these people are from Miami, so I think what we. What might get motherfuckers up in New York might be different in Miami. It might be a little different.

[Mal]

I'm gonna just go out on a limb and say, nash gonna get you up in Miami.

[Julian]

No, for sure. I'm talking about. I mean, Rory saying the different Rick Ross songs.

[Mal]

Oh, okay. All right.

[Rory]

Yeah. Trick Daddy, Thug Holiday, I'm a Thug, Slip N slide. There's like 10.

[Mal]

We need more Trick Daddy songs on this list, though. That's for sure. But I mean, you know, we gotta let DJ Alex sensation and Treat.

[Julian]

Well, we know why. Nan. Nan, Really? I don't know. Maybe I feel this way cause I'm a girl. Nan really gets people up because of. I feel like Trina's the kind of the thing on that record. Like, Trina is what makes that.

[Rory]

But they're both from Miami.

[Damaris]

I don't think it matters.

[Julian]

Yeah, but what I'm saying is, if Trina was gonna pick a song that she was on, her song is a bigger get up anthem than Nano.

[Mal]

Man, listen.

[Julian]

I remember Pull over that Ass. Too fat. Woo. Woo. That's a bigger get up.

[Mal]

I remember the first time I saw that Nan video and Trina took that coat off. I was a little boy in the crib watching videos, but I was stuck. I was like, who is that? I wanted to watch that video every time it came on.

[Rory]

There has to be a reason. Like, that has to be some issue with Trina and Trick Daddy, the fact that that is not on there, you could argue that could be number two, let alone not even in the top ten.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

What about. There's no record from the 2 Live crew.

[Rory]

That's crazy as well.

[Mal]

Well, Uncle Luke.

[Rory]

I mean, but as 2 Live Crew, Ace Hood is not from Miami, though. He's just Florida, right?

[Mal]

I believe so. I don't know if he's from Miami.

[Rory]

Cause if not, like, Hustle Harder.

[Damaris]

Yeah, he's from Port St. Lucia.

[Rory]

Okay. I was gonna say, leaving Ace Hood off this shit, I feel like no Bugatti is. That's a top 10 Florida record.

[Julian]

But there's only 10 spots. And I feel like everybody on this list deserves to be on there.

[Damaris]

Oh, there's 12 spots.

[Mal]

Oh, no, no. I'm not mad at any of these songs. I mean, you know, I understand the culture, but I could have did without conga. I love Gloria.

[Rory]

Like, when color Mike.

[Mal]

How's that not fair? I love the record. I mean, I grew up listening to that. But I'm just saying, like, I would have put nad in before conga. Me personally.

[Rory]

Killer Mike did the Atlanta one. I think Twister did Chicago. Everyone's done a good job of representing all the sounds of their city. So like. Like Miami is all over the place with sounds in a good way.

[Mal]

That's a hot relationship.

[Rory]

They did a pretty good job of trying to include every songs belong on.

[Mal]

The Miami Get Up Anthem list. But, you know, I just. Nah, is. Come on. That's like. I think when you land in Miami, they play that. You could pick up your bags waiting.

[Rory]

For your gate to be.

[Mal]

You could pick up your bags of Carousel 3, and they got that playing for sure.

[Rory]

I'm still on the side of bmf, but other than that, I think it's a cool list.

[Mal]

Shout out to DJ Alex Sensation and Trina for putting together this list. Also shout out to Billboard. Andres Henaro Siones Tequila.

[Rory]

No gunplay. Blasphemous.

[Mal]

Yeah, I think they was trying to stay away from. Stay Away from Gun. They didn't want that issue right there. You know, let's. We fuck with him, but let's leave him off this list, man.

[Rory]

Denzel Curry is from Miami, but I feel like, I guess with the Get Up Anthem thing, I don't know if there's a record that.

[Mal]

Yeah, I don't think. I don't know if Denzel got a Get Up Anthem. Good music.

[Rory]

Why do you think they didn't reach out to your homegirl? Yes, Jules.

[Mal]

For this contractually probably, you know, sign with somebody else at the moment. Can't really do that.

[Rory]

What's Billboard's rival complex?

[Mal]

Sprite, Maybe. I don't know.

[Rory]

Algorithms.

[Julian]

Yo, so I walked into work today.

[Mal]

You walk to work?

[Julian]

I walked into work. No, I didn't walk. I didn't walk from New Jersey. Walked into work, and I heard, like, some, like. Like a Snoop Dogg and Janae song playing, but I'm like, they from the West Coast. Maybe this some old shit. Then Rory come out, was like, yo, this Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre album. This shit hitting now. Mal, do you remember hitting in this? We had a whole conversation about, Yeah.

[Mal]

I said I didn't want to hear it.

[Julian]

Yeah, I thought Rory said he didn't want to hear it.

[Mal]

I said that, too.

[Rory]

I mean, I said I wasn't rushing to it. I didn't particularly care.

[Mal]

Yeah, I said we didn't rush to.

[Rory]

Nor was I.

[Mal]

Like, we wasn't expecting to get this album. But I'm not, You know, it's too legends.

[Julian]

You weren't on my side, O.

[Mal]

No, no, no.

[Julian]

But I mean, both of you niggas.

[Mal]

This is still Snoop and Dre 2 legends. But I don't know if we wanted an album for them in 2024. Like, I'm still waiting on chronic two. That's just me.

[Julian]

Or.

[Mal]

No, the Detox. I'm sorry. Chronic Detox.

[Rory]

You got it. Compton album. This is why this podcast needs healing. Because I had no problem apologizing for my Chris Brown take, and now Damaris is trying to do a gotcha moment because I said I wasn't rushing to this Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre album. And I listened to it today, and it's way, way better than I expected at all. I'm okay with saying I was wrong.

[Mal]

So you like it?

[Rory]

I do. And I went into it thinking, let me listen to this for the podcast. I'm sure I'm gonna hate it. Which is a hater mentality.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Rory]

But we have seen people that are not active in rap. Snoop is a legend in his own right. I don't need to say that. But I didn't know if Snoop was in shape. This could just be too. Lifelong friends back in the studio, just trying to make some music for fun. I wasn't expecting much. I did think it was going to sound weird and outdated. It's fucking great. The production is insane. I mean, it's Dre. But I still went in not thinking if Dre was even in shape at the moment. I know he records Nonstop. We never hear anything, so I don't know where he's at in his life. This entire thing is fire. It's, like, oddly good, man.

[Mal]

Coco Sarah is on two joints, okay.

[Rory]

It's really, really good. And Snoop, who I thought would be out of touch and I probably wouldn't like. His rhymes were great.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

It doesn't sound like yesteryear rap, where they just brag about, like, how they're legends.

[Mal]

All right.

[Rory]

It's just Cool.

[Mal]

It's cool. You sold me. I'm gonna listen to it. You sold me. You sold me. I'm gonna listen to it.

[Rory]

The Janae record. Gorgeous is crazy. Tom Petty and Jelly Roll went nuts.

[Mal]

What does Tom Petty, Jelly Roll smoke? What does Tom Petty and Jelly Roll Going Nuts sound like? What is that? How does Tom Petty and Jelly Roll go nuts?

[Rory]

I mean, you know, it makes a white man blush. That's just good old folk.

[Mal]

Good old folk music. Yeah, with the Dre drums. Okay.

[Rory]

With. No, with the Dre drums.

[Mal]

Okay.

[Rory]

Yeah, it, you know, made you think, like, this is the new Bob Dylan type shit.

[Mal]

Okay.

[Rory]

I'm trying to think which. Cause what about that.

[Damaris]

That one record we were talking about? Guns and Smoke.

[Rory]

Guns and Smoke. Julie just wants to shit on Eminem.

[Damaris]

No, no, I'm genuinely asking.

[Rory]

All right, coming in again, objective, because everyone knows I'm a 50 Stan, and I'm not the biggest Eminem Stan. I thought Em's verse was great. I thought 50 was a little behind on it. Wasn't really my favorite 50 joint, but em was cool.

[Mal]

All right. Yeah.

[Rory]

It's not a. It's set up for M to rap for a while, but it's not, you know, lyrical miracle. Super fragilistic. It's a regular cool Dre drums and M rapping for a while. It's a good project, man. I. I went in wanting to hate, and it's. It's good.

[Mal]

All right. I gotta check it out now.

[Rory]

That pressure beat.

[Mal]

Crazy. Put all of that on it. I gotta. I gotta. You. You dressed it up and made it real, man. I gotta. Gotta check it out.

[Rory]

I think it was. It was the pressure song, which sounded like that song is still on Mal's mind.

[Mal]

What song?

[Damaris]

Sorry? He said, dress it up. Make it real. Like you're still thinking about.

[Mal]

Oh, no, I'm just saying.

[Damaris]

Maul came into the studio playing March Madness. He's been saying that since we started, so that's fine.

[Rory]

Even Damaris, which. She didn't realize we were listening to the album during the. Janae1 Then it went to the pressure beat, and she was like, yo, what's this?

[Julian]

Yeah, I started bouncing, like, up and down. I said, oh, what's this?

[Rory]

No, it's really good.

[Mal]

All right.

[Rory]

Like, it's really good.

[Mal]

I'm gonna check it out, and if it ain't, I'm on your ass next episode.

[Rory]

I mean, it's fine if you don't like it. I. I won't lose sleep.

[Mal]

Oh, that's a shot at y'all, by the way. I don't know if y'all know that. All right, like, they said, that's a shot at y'all. He shot at y'all. And y'all see him. He shot at y'all. Don't. Just let y'all know, like, why, literally.

[Julian]

Today is our perfect day. We keep pissing on it.

[Mal]

I'm just saying, he shot at y'all. And y'all looking at me talking about y'all supposed to be like, excuse me.

[Rory]

It. If the shoe fits thing. If you and I have a disagreement. If you and I have a disagreement in my shoe, I don't particularly care. We can just both like what we like and still be friends.

[Mal]

That's a fact. We all. We. We'll all be still family.

[Rory]

I'll still listen to the Dre album.

[Mal]

I'm listening to it, though.

[Rory]

No, you're not.

[Mal]

I am. I promise you.

[Damaris]

Maris, are you going to cook to this album?

[Rory]

There was some records you could cook to Cook with Maris.

[Julian]

Cooking with Maris.

[Mal]

Tom, Patty and Jelly Roll.

[Rory]

Maris don't do that because you said that three times. Times. They leak your sex tape.

[Julian]

Oh, my God.

[Rory]

Too soon. My bad. What is. I think. I think that is corny, by the way. I don't co. Sign any of that. I don't think it's funny. I think anyone that leaks sex tapes, corny as that was Cooking with.

[Mal]

Who's that?

[Damaris]

This is Damaris's TikTok Corner.

[Julian]

So Damaris's TikTok Corner is funny. So cooking with Kaya is a young girl, I think she's 23, who has gone super viral because she, like, makes, like, just cute little meals in her kitchen, and she, like, twerks, and she has a little theme song that we were just singing. It's very, like. It's very addictive. So. But she's blowing up because all the boys her age. She's 23, so. All the boys her age. Girls don't cook at 22. 23. Right. These niggas are starving, eating ramen noodles, playing a video Game. But she's gone so viral. Her. She has a huge male fan base now and they're just like, kaia is the greatest woman in the world. This, this and that. And you know when that happens, when women start getting attention for things, there's a bunch of haters, both women and men, who are now hating on her. And it's become this whole thing.

[Mal]

Good for you, Kai. That means you're doing something good when you are hating on you doing something good.

[Julian]

Yes, it's become this whole big thing. But apparently someone leaked her sex T.

[Damaris]

That's how she'd be cooking.

[Julian]

I don't. Yeah, I don't think that's her.

[Rory]

I didn't see. I mean, I didn't see the footage. I just saw on Twitter. Everyone was talking about her sex tape was leaking. Yeah, but to your point, the moment men started saying, yo, get you a Kaya, all the women had to go find a reason why she was a. And like, all right, she's an adult woman that has sex. I don't think that went the way you thought it was gonna go.

[Damaris]

Yeah, women are mad because although she traditionally posts food making videos, she started posting non food related content. Guys. How dare she?

[Mal]

Oh, that's when airport.

[Damaris]

You should die.

[Julian]

Yeah, she's like, my man is on this same Internet. Well, bitch, get in the kitchen. I don't know what to tell if your man is. If your man is obsessed with a girl on the Internet that cooks and.

[Damaris]

Twerks, what's better than food and pussy? That's like the basis of a strip club fair. He ate, like, what? You're going to get mad at that.

[Rory]

I mean, if a woman does cook and you catch your man just looking at other cooking pages while she's twerking, I could see that upsetting the household a bit. But if you some bum chick that doesn't cook for your man, then, I mean, you have no sit Indian style. Shut the fuck up. Like, so. So they enjoy that content.

[Mal]

So they're. So women are mad at her because their boyfriends are watching her cook and twerk. Internet gets weird every day.

[Julian]

So she's blown up on TikTok. She has like a couple million followers now. But I don't know what the influencer influencers are going to do when TikTok, like, leaves next month. Month. Y'all know Tick Tock is leaving next month. It's official.

[Mal]

Is it official?

[Julian]

It's official.

[Rory]

I mean, they say that. They say that all the time, but I don't know if that's really the case. And also before we do get to the TikTok going away, we are, we are on women because they hate on this young lady. But there's no way that sex tape or alleged sex tape didn't come from a man. A girl didn't have that. Yeah, a corny ass man did that. So I don't want to just put it on the women.

[Julian]

Yeah, yeah, it's. Y'all should watch her content, though.

[Rory]

What should I cook? What's like your favorite dish from her?

[Julian]

Oh, I don't. I know how to cook. I don't need to watch that. But. But I think vegan.

[Mal]

She don't make vegan dishes, so I can't. Does she? I. I'm just talking.

[Julian]

I. I don't think so.

[Rory]

No.

[Julian]

She doesn't give vegan vibes.

[Mal]

Yeah, I won't be watching that. But shout out to her though, man.

[Rory]

Well, what are you guys going to do when Tik Tok goes away January 29?

[Mal]

I don't have to. It means nothing to me. I not. I'm not even on Tik Tok.

[Julian]

I'm a jump from where I. Give me a bridge. I don't know what's a good one.

[Mal]

Zolva, pack you up.

[Damaris]

Can't do it on TikTok Live.

[Julian]

TikTok is life, man. But also we're laughing and joking. But outside of. From a consumer perspective, TikTok has made a lot of millionaires. A lot of millionaires.

[Rory]

So I agree. So of a lot of platforms.

[Mal]

That means people can just pay their bills and buy groceries now. So much it takes a million dollars a year.

[Julian]

Listen, you ain't lying. My thing is just TikTok has built up, up like a lot of influencers and I just. As a creator, I'm not rich off tick tock, but just as a creator who's looking at this, I'm wondering what these people are going to do because Instagram doesn't. Instagram is a completely different platform. You can't. On TikTok you can open your phone and just start talking and people. You'll get millions and millions of likes from it. It doesn't really work like that on Instagram there's people that do it, but it's not as common. So it's like, what do. Do these people go to YouTube? I've been telling people to go to YouTube for that, but maybe shorts. I don't know. I don't know who's gonna pick up the slack from TikTok because people I know we all laugh like, oh, we're too good for TikTok. Da, da, da. TikTok is a huge fucking platform. It's probably the biggest social media. It's too good for media.

[Rory]

I'm just not good at it. That's all.

[Damaris]

There could literally just be. Because can't they just develop another app, just do the same thing?

[Rory]

I mean, vine was very similar to it. There's been a lot of models of what TikTok is for years, but TikTok mastered it.

[Damaris]

Cause ByteDance has been around forever. TikTok's just like their fifth iteration of the app, which they were.

[Julian]

Yeah, they were musically before, if I'm not mistaken.

[Damaris]

So I'm just saying, like an American company.

[Mal]

Just.

[Rory]

Have we seen that really work? TikTok repurposed a lot of apps that already existed. Have we seen that work Anywhere else besides TikTok? Like, we've seen replacements for Twitter X a million times. I've even signed up for them. I lasted one week, went right back to Twitter. Yeah.

[Damaris]

How's Threads doing?

[Rory]

Threads is tanking to the point they're, like, forcing us to click it to even post a comment. Yeah, that's not working. The Big three just kind of remains the only time we've really seen it outside of TikTok. Was Facebook taking over MySpace?

[Julian]

Well, I think the issue. I think where it might be successful if somebody does create a TikTok dupe is if we don't have access to TikTok. Like, we, of course we can go to these fake Twitters, but Twitter still. Still exists, and all of our friends are still on the original Twitter. I feel like if we can't access TikTok and everybody, everybody has to move to one different app. I feel like. Like, it'll garner more success.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Twitter wasn't a new app. It was just a rebrand. So it's not like people had to redownload something.

[Julian]

No, he's talking about the new Twitters, though. Like the social.

[Damaris]

What's that?

[Rory]

Wherever Don Lemon went, the liberal one.

[Damaris]

Blue. Blue Ski, whatever that is.

[Julian]

Blue sky.

[Damaris]

Blue sky.

[Rory]

Where they, like, respect people. Not. Not my type of app.

[Mal]

Blue Ski.

[Rory]

Blue Ski.

[Damaris]

It's like, yeah, you must. You must have this many.

[Rory]

You know, it's trash.

[Mal]

Blue Ski.

[Rory]

Not a single joke whatsoever.

[Julian]

They said people were kinder on there. Nice.

[Mal]

A kinder place.

[Rory]

Don't be kind with, like, your friends and family. I want to see on my Twitter table.

[Damaris]

You guys know. Oh, God. I'm not trying to rage bait right now, but you guys Know like that there's like barbershops now that that say they add their advertised as like all are welcome. We're not, you know, gender conforming, but we'll cut anybody's hair. It's like we care all your barber shop. And then you get in the chair and the. The hairdresser will say, is it okay can I touch you before you get a haircut? You're there to get a haircut. The question is, can I touch you? What if you say no to that? What the fuck are you going to do?

[Mal]

I wish, I wish it my barber's chair. He said, yo, can I touch you?

[Damaris]

Do I have permission to touch you? Or something like that? Like they ask for.

[Mal]

You have to do everything. I'm here so I can get out of here, man. What are we talking about? Can I touch you?

[Damaris]

I don't. That bothers me so much.

[Julian]

Did they ask you?

[Damaris]

No, no, no. I've just seen. I've seen videos. Like I've seen you look like you.

[Julian]

Get your hair at the gay barber.

[Mal]

Shop at the they them a shop cannot touch.

[Rory]

But that doesn't shock me because I watched a whole piece that Piers Morgan did that we should be asking our babies and toddlers for permission to change their diaper. Like ask for consent.

[Mal]

Who said that?

[Julian]

I think he was being funny.

[Rory]

No, no, he was arguing with the two crazy bitches that thought we should do that.

[Julian]

Oh yeah.

[Rory]

No, it was real. It's 100% real.

[Mal]

Piers Morgan was arguing.

[Rory]

Yes.

[Mal]

Oh, yeah. He not. He not trying to let. He not trying to hear that shit. Piers Morgan ain't trying to hit that.

[Rory]

And then just asking simple questions to these outraged ladies like, all right, how am I supposed to ask someone that doesn't know how to communicate if I can change their diaper? Yeah, you can see it in their eyes. All right, I'm. You are wasting air time right now.

[Mal]

Please get the out.

[Julian]

That's just rage baiting. There is. I do think that the thing with kids so asking kids, can you hug them instead of just parents. Cuz when I was younger, my parents was like, give your aunt a hug. Give your aunt a hug. If you don't. If you don't want to hug somebody as a kid, you don't have to for.

[Rory]

I mean, if you're at that age.

[Mal]

Where you could communicate that, then okay, yeah, I agree. If I walk in Damaris, you have a baby and I see you asking your baby, hey, can I change your shitty diaper?

[Julian]

Oh, no, I'm not talking about that. That's stupid.

[Mal]

I'm calling the police on you. I'm like, yo, she's crazy. This is postpartum, I think. And she's asking an infant, calling the police.

[Julian]

Cause I have postpartum.

[Mal]

She's asking the infant with a shitty diaper, can I change your diaper? Like, what are we talking about here?

[Rory]

But, I mean, I do agree with Damaris. Like, when Amara. If I ask Amara for a kiss and she says no, I let her know that that's okay to say no to. Like, I think that's important because I'm with you. Like, when you're a kid and yo, go hug you. Like, I don't want to do that.

[Mal]

Right? No, I get it. That's all we get.

[Rory]

I have to fucking hug everyone in my family. No, I just want to sit over here and mind my fucking business. Don't touch me, weirdos, unless I'm shitting in my diaper.

[Mal]

Exactly.

[Rory]

At the point you have no choice.

[Mal]

But when kids can communicate that. I totally agree. I'm with that.

[Rory]

Okay, I'm going to sound like a liberal cuck, but I'm not that mad that there's a barbershop shop that does that. Maybe some people have, like, really crazy intimacy touching issues and still need to get haircuts. Maybe that place makes them feel safer. Yeah, if that was like, standard at every barbershop.

[Mal]

Let me tell you one thing.

[Rory]

It's only one, don't do this. We don't do this outrage Republican, where one thing happens. And now the whole world that way.

[Mal]

We're not one drag queen.

[Rory]

You read one book to one kindergartner, and now the whole world thinks that dragon queens are trying to switch.

[Mal]

You do not agree with that. You do not agree with that shit.

[Julian]

Well, I don't think this.

[Rory]

I don't need to agree. I don't care.

[Julian]

If it's not harming anybody, it's not impairing on my. What I like to have received at my regular hair salons, then that's fine. I don't mind. I think that's weird shit. Not weird in a bad way, but just. I think it's a little off. But I don't mind people having their own shit in their own corners of the world that don't have nothing to do with me. If it don't affect you. Why would it. Why would you even. Why would you care?

[Damaris]

My problem.

[Mal]

Somebody.

[Damaris]

Well, go ahead, Ma.

[Mal]

Being asking the bar, your barber asking you do you mind if I touch you? Is fucking crazy.

[Julian]

Yes, but I don't mind people doing crazy shit on their own time. That's what I'm saying. Like, I don't think that it's.

[Mal]

Why are you here?

[Rory]

Cut your own fucking head for like.

[Mal]

Get out of here.

[Rory]

Kinky. Sexual.

[Mal]

Yeah, but get out of here.

[Rory]

This is a barbershop.

[Mal]

I have to touch your fucking head. I have to brush your hair. I have to comb your hair. I have to put clippers here. I have to touch you. You. I shouldn't ask you.

[Rory]

You know, what the fuck of this barbershop? I mean, if this was a universal rule that the Democrats put in place for every barbershop has to do, then I'm on your side. Then I'm full blown Tucker Carlson, Fox News. This is crazy, this agenda. But if there's one fucking hippie hipster barbershop that wants to ask this to lesbians do, like, have a blast, bro. I don't care. I don't care at all.

[Mal]

We need to bring back mental asylum.

[Rory]

I don't care what these kooks is. My haircut takes 20 minutes. Seeing these talks to someone else.

[Mal]

These kooks, crazy, batshit people walking around.

[Damaris]

Walk into the.

[Mal]

Put them in a mental asylum. Bring back mental health facilities. You got an equinox on everything.

[Rory]

Republicans are taking them away.

[Mal]

Put fucking mental health facilities on every corner. Just like you got a Starbucks Maul.

[Damaris]

You walk into the barbershop in the Bronx and this is your interaction.

[Mal]

That would never be my interaction.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Okay, cool.

[Rory]

And what are your pronouns?

[Mal]

They, them, she, them.

[Rory]

This is a joke.

[Mal]

We exchanged those.

[Julian]

Yes.

[Rory]

Okay. I'm glad that you came in today to give me. This is. This is fake.

[Julian]

That's not fake.

[Damaris]

No, this was. This was the original one. This was the original one.

[Mal]

Yeah. And the shop is empty. Nobody's going to this fucking place, man. Get out of here with this shit.

[Julian]

I also think the way that she.

[Rory]

And her hair is already cut.

[Julian]

I don't. Sorry. The way that. The way that she asked was not in a. Am I allowed to touch you? I think it was more in a. Like, when you go to the doctor's office, you know that the doctor knows she has to touch you. You know that the doctor has to touch you. But she usually is like, all right. She lets you know that she's about to touch you. Because some people are weird about being surprised. Like, being touched and not knowing exactly when it's coming, if that makes sense.

[Rory]

That's when the clippers go on.

[Mal]

You know, if we talking about getting a physical and Shit like, that's different. Cause you. Your women have to get, you know, their private areas looked at it and just regular, just. Okay, well, whatever it is, the doctor's office. I can understand that because, you know, the doctor has to check your anatomy. If you sit in a barber's chair and can I touch you? Like, you mean, can you cut my hair?

[Julian]

Yeah, but I don't.

[Mal]

If my barber says, can I touch you? Lift my cape up and try to go, then it's a problem I have got. But as long as you stay above the shoulders, we good, fam.

[Julian]

Like, again, like I said, my point is, I don't think it's. Am I allowed to touch you? She knows you're gonna get touched. It's more a. Can I touch you? I'm about to touch you, you know, when the touch is about to come. Because some people are weird about that damaris.

[Mal]

I mean, that's what they wanted to. Sat down in a barber chair and been surprised at the barber chair because that's you.

[Julian]

You're expect.

[Mal]

What is that?

[Rory]

Clippers, you pervert. What are you doing?

[Mal]

Was that a brush spraying water on me?

[Julian]

What the are would like to know when they about to spray that alcohol on your forehead.

[Rory]

I can see it.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Bottom to my head the whole time.

[Mal]

It's.

[Rory]

It.

[Mal]

Shit is stupid, man.

[Rory]

But at the doctor's office, when I've gotten my. My colon checked, he never, like, warns me, here comes the plane. Like, he. He just sticks his fingers in my ass.

[Mal]

Here comes.

[Julian]

I guarantee you he does not just bend you over, spread your hole and.

[Rory]

First of all, that's not how it goes. You lay in the fetal position on the side of the deli paper, and then he inserts his fingers into your.

[Julian]

About to stick his fingers in your ass. He does not just stick his fingers in your ass. With no warning.

[Damaris]

Rory asks for the stirrups, then goes reverse on him.

[Rory]

Positive. He doesn't because he knows when I get in the fetal position, I'm aware that he's about to stick.

[Mal]

I thought you were ready.

[Rory]

Well, you're never ready.

[Mal]

I thought he was about to say when he. He knows when I get in the fetal position, I'm ready. I thought that's what he was about to say. Like, you have this, like, synergy with each other.

[Rory]

He's not. He's not even a professional doctor. I just call him doctor.

[Mal]

You've never.

[Rory]

I like deli paper at my house. This is in my home.

[Mal]

He doesn't have his certificates on a wall.

[Rory]

No, no, no, no, this is role play.

[Damaris]

The deli paper. That's his version of the Soho.

[Mal]

Oh, shit.

[Rory]

But no, the doctor. The doctor doesn't say anything. There's someone there that has to be a witness. But no, he doesn't say it. You just get in the fetal position and just. Just wait.

[Mal]

Yeah, it's up to him. Just have your way, sir.

[Rory]

Wait for your lashings.

[Julian]

Hey. Yo. Is your prostate healthy though?

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Okay, good. I'm happy Mal is yours.

[Mal]

Yeah, it is. I'm going again next year though.

[Damaris]

Oh, nice.

[Rory]

Are you ready for.

[Julian]

You haven't checked yet?

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Oh, okay.

[Mal]

I'm saying I'm going. I'm getting a physical next year.

[Damaris]

What was it used to be every. Every five years for a colonoscopy pat or what is it? They. I think they changed it. I think they. It's now a year, like less of a wait where it used to be.

[Rory]

Five years, 40 is average, right?

[Damaris]

Yes. I remember it being at one point it used to be every five years. Now I think they're saying every to four should get it checked.

[Rory]

I just feel like with the food we have, younger people should get them. You should. You should flush out that.

[Julian]

That's the number one. If I'm not mistaken, I was reading an article on it. That's the number one killer of Gen Z, I want to say right now is colon cancer.

[Rory]

Oh. I mean for, for men, colon cancer is our breast cancer. Now, like, unfortunately, personally, the amount of men I know that have passed from colon cancer in the last 10 years is insane thing. But check. Check your booty hole, man. It's okay. Even if he doesn't warn you that he's going to touch you, your doctor has your best interest at heart. Let. Let him finger you so you can live a long healthy life and just.

[Julian]

Stop making it weird because you're going to scare people off.

[Damaris]

Even if it is for pleasure, stop being a.

[Rory]

And let that man finger you.

[Damaris]

Even if it is for the doctor's pleasure, it still has health benefits for you.

[Rory]

I haven't figured out a different way to do this.

[Julian]

No, because they got to be able to touch it. They got to be able to feel the.

[Mal]

I mean, just scan me like you can see through my whole anatomy. Like put me in the. In the. In the incubator.

[Julian]

But they won't be able to feel the lumps.

[Damaris]

The stroke's different.

[Julian]

Yeah, and those are.

[Rory]

AI is going to replace everything but that test.

[Damaris]

But the booty and the fingers, that stays the same.

[Mal]

They don't get Rid of that part of the test.

[Rory]

Cars will drive themselves.

[Mal]

We can't.

[Rory]

We will have to have.

[Mal]

You can get to LA in 20 minutes now. But I still have to put two fingers.

[Julian]

And I wish for, like, like, now, granted. Like, I don't know. Like, I just. I wish women, the things we had to go through, was as easy. Like a finger in the ass. That's nothing.

[Rory]

Somebody's taking y'all like that.

[Damaris]

That's Monday. Somebody.

[Julian]

Yeah, right. That's when I'm taking a popsicle stick and going in all the way inside my body and scraping with the. Not. Not scraping with the popsicle stick.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

You'd think they'd find something better than wood. Like, what if you got a sliver? Yeah, like, couldn't that happen? It's wood, I'm sure.

[Mal]

Yeah, but it's a different type of.

[Julian]

It's medical gray, baby. I don't think I'm going to get a splinter.

[Rory]

Has anyone, like, definitely happened. Double check. Is there anyone that, like, went to medical school but dropped out but could give us the info of, like, why I have to cough when you're cuffing my ball?

[Damaris]

Oh, it's for your hemorrhoid. Check. Hemorrhoids.

[Rory]

I know, but, like, what. I've even done it myself. Like, I've coughed and held my nuts. Like, what are they?

[Mal]

Hernia.

[Damaris]

You mean hernia. Sorry, yo.

[Mal]

Get out. Get out your butt, dog.

[Damaris]

My bad. We were talking about ass. No, it is weird that. That's, like, still, like, a top priority on, like, a. You'd think a doctor's checklist. Coughing for a hernia is, like, all.

[Rory]

Right, but have you ever cuffed your nuts and, like, cough just to see if you could feel what they feel like?

[Mal]

I. Yeah, my balls just shift.

[Julian]

They. They do.

[Mal]

Like, your sacks tighten up. Yeah, your sacks tighten up. Like, whoa, what is that? Your hands are cold.

[Julian]

Really?

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Now the next guy. Well, I'm celebrating now, but, like, the next time I see a guy, I'm gonna hold his balls and make him cough and see if I can feel it.

[Damaris]

We can do it tonight at the show.

[Mal]

Just a random to love yours. Hey, he's playing our song. Hey, hey.

[Rory]

Your health is a priority.

[Mal]

Man is playing our song.

[Julian]

Jermaine.

[Damaris]

This time, just me on the live stream at ball.

[Rory]

Did they do that with women at all? Like, next time I finger a chick, should I ask her to cough? Like, what's the.

[Damaris]

What's y'all perceive tongue scraping?

[Julian]

No, they only. They only tell us to cough when they put Our hand. They're like the why. How did I say it?

[Damaris]

Like stethoscope.

[Julian]

She said, why did I swallow my tongue?

[Mal]

She said stethoscope.

[Julian]

When they put the stethoscope on our back, they only tell us to cough. They don't put a finger in our and say cough. No.

[Damaris]

Well, one doctor did and he got jammed up.

[Mal]

The Olympic doctor? Yeah.

[Damaris]

Larry Nasser.

[Mal]

Yeah. Piece of that was sick.

[Julian]

That was so sick.

[Mal]

I hope we didn't kill him yet.

[Damaris]

Where's he at? I was going to say is he not dead yet?

[Mal]

Kill that.

[Julian]

Piece of that was sick.

[Damaris]

They got to get him, like stab him. Oh yeah, he did get stabbed. That's right.

[Mal]

Yeah. He missed.

[Damaris]

No, he got stabbed a bunch. And they were just marking him.

[Rory]

They're going to stab him again. Yeah, they were trying to keep him alive so he can just keep stabbing him.

[Julian]

If you guys don't know who Larry Nasser is, Larry Nassar is the Olympic like pediatrician doctor or whatever that he was like molesting all the Olympics athletes.

[Damaris]

And he was the head for team us for Michigan State gymnastics as well.

[Mal]

Piece of.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Speaking of prisoners and updates I have to laugh at. At mall's news network they got their marching orders for Luigi. They were saying that the prisoners when Luigi gets onto the yard are gonna have a real issue that he killed the CEO of a health insurance. He was gonna run the yard and that they are going to bully him on that yard because of what he did.

[Mal]

Man.

[Rory]

That's what fox is telling us.

[Mal]

He about to eat good in there, man.

[Damaris]

I don't get it.

[Rory]

They were talking like Luigi was a child molester when he got got to chow.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

I'm so confused by the extreme like the right wing agenda when it comes to this kind of stuff. Because you would think based on their rhetoric and how they're so anti establishment. Anti big corporation establishment. But why do they love. I never understood that. Why are they so pro this guy? They love guns.

[Rory]

Go through. Go through the investors of Fox News. I get you will find three or four. That's why health insurance company companies one being united.

[Damaris]

Because on paper, everything Luigi did is everything that they would champion for sure. He shot someone in New York City with a gun. And who represents big money corporation health. Not just big money health. The one thing that they're always saying we don't trust is the American healthcare system. And then you got one. And then it's like, well, he went too far.

[Mal]

I mean, well, yeah, he's the guy.

[Rory]

He did what you guys Preach. It's part of their establishment, of course. And they were also very much anti Obamacare. Loved it when they just changed the name when it wasn't Obamacare.

[Damaris]

But it was the same.

[Rory]

They hate that. And, you know, universal healthcare is not a Republican talking point. So this guy, you know, and he was what, bisexual? So he has to be like a Hillary supporter. And like he was hired by the Clintons, you know, that type of shit.

[Julian]

Oh, he's bi.

[Rory]

I mean, I guess. I don't know.

[Damaris]

How did they even find that out?

[Julian]

I don't know.

[Rory]

I mean, his Facebook was a little zested.

[Damaris]

I saw a video of him shotgunning beer.

[Julian]

He probably did that. Sexy, too.

[Mal]

That's pretty bi.

[Julian]

Cute little kid.

[Rory]

Chris Rock was on snl, which, by the way, I found out at our live show from Derek Gaines. He's like, yo, Chris, about to do his monologue. I was like, did they advertise that Chris Rock was doing Saturday Night Live?

[Mal]

I didn't see that.

[Rory]

I didn't see the post it. No, I didn't see anything.

[Damaris]

It was pretty quiet. And I hadn't either.

[Rory]

It was odd because this is like a big moment. But he discussed it. Had some funny jokes of, you know, feeling for the CEO, but sometimes drug dealers get killed.

[Damaris]

You want to play? I can run. The fact everybody's worried.

[Rory]

I mean, we got Luigi. We got Luigi, you know, and that's good. I really feel sorry for the. For the family. I mean, everybody's fixated on how good looking this guy attractive man, looked like Jonah Hill. No one would care. Random stranger, straight Jonah doing that to Jonah Hill is crazy.

[Damaris]

Dead.

[Mal]

Okay.

[Rory]

But he actually killed a man.

[Mal]

A man.

[Rory]

Swag. A man with a family, a band with kids, man.

[Mal]

I mean, I have condolences. I'm gonna.

[Rory]

I don't have real condolences for, you.

[Mal]

Know, the healthcare CEO.

[Damaris]

I mean, this is a real person.

[Rory]

You know, but you also got a.

[Damaris]

You know, sometimes drug dealers get shot.

[Rory]

You can set up.

[Mal]

True up, but true.

[Rory]

I. I like Chris's monologue. I mean, probably not his. His absolute best, but it was. It was a good monologue. It's always nice to hear from Chris Rock a lister. I mean, who would say otherwise? Also, if I ever saw him in Soho, like.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Think I wouldn't say that to his.

[Damaris]

Face in one of our skits. His last public appearance was in our skit.

[Rory]

Well, no, I believe it was last week. Wasn't he doing like a private set somewhere?

[Mal]

Oh, yeah.

[Rory]

And ran off stage. So that's why I was so confused why this wasn't promoted. Like, there was a big Chris Rock scandal last week and now he's doing Saturday Night Live. Like, yeah, no one I didn't know.

[Mal]

Until I saw the clip. I had no idea he. I mean, but to be fair, I'm not a big. I don't really watch SNL like that. But I mean, I think we would know if one of their biggest alumni were coming back to host. I think that would have been everywhere. But no, I didn't know he was hosting it.

[Rory]

So he was at.

[Damaris]

Yeah, he was doing a private show and allegedly there were people in the crowd. It was a non filming show and people were filming him. And the rumor was he stormed out and was pissed off. But someone, a witness says he actually just simply put the mic down and walked away. So they were basically.

[Rory]

What's wrong with that?

[Damaris]

They were violating protocol by filming him. And you said, I'm done.

[Mal]

Oh, I mean, that's it. Simple. And that's supposed to be filming me?

[Rory]

Yeah. I don't understand what the outrage was with this. And it wasn't even really in the media on Chris Rock's side. They tried to make him sound like he was like insane and like going through something like stormed off stage. Like, no, somebody's filming me. You're not allowed to.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's it. I'm not. Yeah. Set is done.

[Damaris]

Since 2017, he has implemented a no filming policy at his shows.

[Rory]

I will say, when I saw Chappelle at. At Radio City for that Sunday midnight show and you have to put your phone like in the bag thing, like, you can't. Trust me, I tried to open it. You can't. Outside of it being Earthquake. Michael Che, Chappelle. What's the. This is going to sound racist. The Indian guy that does the Daily Show a lot, he's great.

[Damaris]

Oh, Hasan Minhaj.

[Rory]

Yes, him. The standup shows you get when they know everyone's phone is locked away was by far the greatest standup I've seen from every last one of them. They do not give a fuck because no one's going to film them and get in trouble. Best comedy show ever. Like anytime I've seen that with shows, you have to put your phone away. I get excited because I know it's going to be a good comedy show.

[Mal]

People don't care. They're going to say whatever they want makes a seller. We went to that.

[Rory]

Michael Che is. I think Michael Che is hilarious. Now think about Michael Che without having to worry about NBC. It was insane. Anything he would have said would have gotten him fired in a heartbeat. Heartbeat. Like, who cares? You're in Radio City and everyone's phone is locked.

[Mal]

But we were at. When we was at the Comedy. The Comedy Store in la, right? Did they. Did we have to put our phones away?

[Rory]

No, but that was like a roast battle that wasn't really, like famous people, so. No, but I even saw now that.

[Mal]

One dude was getting his 911 jokes off. I felt like he only did that because our phones were away. Like, we couldn't film. He was going crazy.

[Rory]

It's def. If you take your phone out at the Comedy Store, no matter what, a security guard will grab you. But it's not like. Like you don't have to put them in bags. And like, I saw Bill Burr popped up one time when I was at Comedy Store, phones were fine. Mark Norman, there's a bunch of people that are big comics that they didn't make you do that. But it's also, I think for the people that go to, you know, actual comedy clubs, a lot have that respect. Like, why take our phones out? And also, who wants to watch something through your phone when you're there?

[Mal]

It's weird.

[Rory]

Watch the show.

[Mal]

You know, they want to post it on their ig.

[Julian]

Yeah, it didn't happen if you didn't post it.

[Rory]

If Damaris does not cry tonight, but cried at the Gunna show, we're gonna have an interesting Thursday.

[Damaris]

I'm probably gonna cry with.

[Julian]

I cried this morning when January 28th played on my phone on random. I'm going to cry.

[Damaris]

I'll probably cry with Damaris because I'm be watching Damaris cry.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

And I'll be happy that I'm having this moment with Damaris.

[Rory]

What song is going to do it.

[Damaris]

Whenever she cries Because I. I'm emotional when I see other people get emotional.

[Mal]

I cried out of J. Cole set one time.

[Julian]

You did?

[Damaris]

Here we go. He's teasing it up.

[Rory]

Voicemails.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

All right.

[Damaris]

Here we go.

[Julian]

See? And I fell for it like a idiot.

[Rory]

Said, oh, you.

[Damaris]

Lofted.

[Mal]

He gave such a heartfelt speech.

[Rory]

All crying at Kenny Lofton. It's hilarious. Hey, great lead off.

[Mal]

He gave such a heartfelt speech, man. You know?

[Rory]

You know, Cole was going to give him at least a 15 minute speech during the show.

[Mal]

Yeah, man.

[Damaris]

I'm a live streamer for you, Ma.

[Mal]

Please do. Please.

[Damaris]

If he gets, I'll go live on IG for you, Julian.

[Mal]

Promise me if he gets on that stage tonight, he's not. And he starts talking about that apology again, please record that shit and send it to him.

[Rory]

He's going to talk about four sills.

[Mal]

We heard the album Tale of Two Cities. Tale of Two Cities.

[Julian]

I think he might announce when the fall off is coming at this show though.

[Mal]

Good.

[Rory]

Possibly I could see that for sure. They kind of dropped the ball by not having the tickets available in Forest Hills.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's. Who would have went there and got the. Yeah.

[Rory]

I mean there's a Forest Hills in New York.

[Mal]

That's what's up.

[Rory]

And I feel like him and Drake have dropped the ball by not putting out a Forest Hills song. They're both from Forest Hills and then they put Action Bronson on it.

[Mal]

Julian, once again, if he gets up on that stage tonight, please record it and send it to me.

[Rory]

I'll give you my password to the inevitable. Please. I'm going to purchase the stream.

[Damaris]

This is for you.

[Mal]

Please, bro. Please. It's all I ask. I never asked you for anything but that. I need to see that. Please, Please. That's all I ask. Do we have voicemail?

[Rory]

You don't think it'll be on Twitter the moment the speech happens?

[Mal]

No, but I need it from Julian because I know he's gonna get the. I'll do it for the.

[Damaris]

Is him rehearsing the speech?

[Mal]

Yeah. Yeah. Julian knows what I want to see. He knows what I want to pause.

[Julian]

There you go.

[Mal]

Why y'all. But I think. I think when we look at pauses, we should look at like how your brain like interpreted that.

[Rory]

Julian knows what I want to see. That's. I don't think that's we're talking about.

[Julian]

Cam would have paused that.

[Mal]

Julian, do we have voicemails?

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Should I say pause too?

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

You've got mail. I'm asking a man for voicemails.

[Damaris]

This. Well, this might be a pause worthy voicemail.

[Rory]

Of course.

[Damaris]

Here we go.

[Bailey]

Hi, guys. So I'm Bailey from California.

[Mal]

Hey, Bailey.

[Bailey]

I just want to say that I love you guys.

[Mal]

Thank you for answering your question.

[Bailey]

I am 26 and my boyfriend is 25 and I'm having issues with him and how he interacts with his friends. Yes, I've seen this before, like you know, amongst like people that are my age, maybe in high school or whatever. But it's kind of crazy that we are a little older and they're still doing this. He a little bit homoerotic. Like too homoerotic with his friends. Like they call each other daddy and they play around and they play for. That's play flirt.

[Julian]

That's fine, right?

[Bailey]

But, like, there goes into, like. There's like this pep pinot trick where, like, they put a cucumber up to, like, they put it by their, you know, thing, and they put it up to their friend's mouth, and the friend, like, actually gagged on that shit. That's crazy to me. You know, and other things that just crossed the line for me, and I feel like.

[Rory]

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Damaris]

There's a lot to it.

[Rory]

No, no, hold on.

[Mal]

A boyfriend does what?

[Damaris]

It's like Orlando Brown in an interview.

[Rory]

I thought this was going to be, like, just a quick bit Bailey, that.

[Mal]

Started off so sweet.

[Rory]

Like, just date black men that are homophobic instead of white men that do the joking gay stuff with their friends. The cucumber took it to a hold. Like, I've been around white friends that do the gay joke stuff. Like, that's. That's sort of standard, especially in your 20s. The cucumber gag. I don't know that bit. It's like, that's a whole.

[Damaris]

He fell asleep and put a carrot in his ass.

[Rory]

So wait, so they take the cucumber, put it where their dick is, and.

[Damaris]

Then walk to another friend and he.

[Rory]

They gag on it and he goes.

[Julian]

I don't think they actually gag, but they, like, fake.

[Damaris]

Like, it's like the Orlando Brown with the mic thing.

[Rory]

If they don't gag, that's even gayer that they, like, are used to.

[Julian]

They just.

[Rory]

You can continue with this voice. Sorry, I thought she was overreacting a bit. And hey, you're dating someone that's 25. It'll pass. I don't know, man. They might each other.

[Julian]

They might each other. It's funny. All right, go ahead.

[Damaris]

All right, sorry. I was trying to find the Orlando Brown thing.

[Bailey]

It becomes then cheating. I don't know if it's a cultural thing because he is Mexican and I'm African American, so I don't know if that plays a big, you know, part in this or what. But he's saying, you know, I'm. It's a big deal or I'm making it a big deal and it's not. He's saying that it's just jokes. And I don't understand because I'm not a man or, you know, whatever. They just, like, try to make each other uncomfortable. And that's just what's funny about it. But I know as a bisexual woman, I don't find it funny. And I'm just like, is. Is he gay? Like, I don't know, like. Or Is it just jokes? And what's so funny about this? And even, like, pretending to, like, kiss each other and see which. Which one gets, like, grossed out the fastest. It's just weird, right? So I don't understand. Like, should I. Am I making it a big deal?

[Rory]

No, you're not. Like, no, baby, they're gay.

[Julian]

No, leave him.

[Damaris]

Gay chicken is crazy.

[Julian]

They're giving each other prostate exams. Leave.

[Mal]

Barely know they're talking.

[Rory]

And not for health reasons.

[Mal]

You're not taking it too far. Your boyfriend is obviously bisexual, just like you are. And it's okay if you want. You know, if that's what you want. But those games, that's not. Try to kiss me and go get the cucumber and I'll gag on. What is that? What is that Energy? What is that?

[Rory]

I've made gay jokes to make other people feel uncomfortable, but this is a whole different level. Like, seeing who could kiss each other longer before they get grossed out is. No one's grossed out.

[Mal]

They're just.

[Rory]

They just kissing.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's. And that's fine if that's what you are. If that's what you are, kissing cousins, it's fine. But, like, stop playing the go get the cucumber and gag game. I don't know what that is. That's just crazy. Like, just stop.

[Damaris]

They just take casual elephant walks together.

[Rory]

You know what she should do?

[Mal]

What is the elephant walk? I don't know.

[Damaris]

You guys don't know?

[Mal]

No, no. I mean, I know elephants. Yo.

[Julian]

I'm cracking.

[Mal]

What is the elephant walk?

[Rory]

I don't know what elephant.

[Julian]

I didn't know what a dart was.

[Damaris]

God, you guys are. All right. So elephant walk, it's, like, popular in, like, fraternities. Basically, you're here, he's a frat boy, right here. You're blindfolded and naked. It's usually called BNB boxes and blindfold. But you, in this case, you're mostly naked. And you follow the guy in front of you. You're, like, crawling in a circle, and you're holding the guy in front of you by their dick and balls. And you walk around.

[Mal]

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Damaris]

You're not always crawling. You could be standing.

[Mal]

Hold on.

[Rory]

Yeah, some people have self respect.

[Mal]

Nobody said a word. What fraternity is this is just, like.

[Damaris]

A common hazing tactic amongst, like, white fraternities?

[Mal]

Is that what they do to get in Lambda Lambda Lambda?

[Damaris]

No, I never did an elephant walk, but there were fraternities on my campus that did elephant walks. It's a thing. It Kind of looks like this, but your butt ass naked could.

[Rory]

Yo. I can assure you guys, if Kappa Alpha side fraternity incorporated asked me to grab another man's dick and walk around, you would be looking at a pure civilian right now.

[Mal]

Yo, yo, man, this is. I'm telling you, man, we got.

[Rory]

Who came up with that, though? Like, that's what.

[Mal]

These are the questions. These are the podcast topics. Who came up with the elephant walk? Who was the first person that said, fellas, I got it. Grab each other's dick and walk around?

[Rory]

Because they're like, with Kappa.

[Damaris]

There you go. 1922.

[Rory]

The fact that they even know the year is an elephant walk started 1922, after the Aggies lost the first two games of their football season, which, by the way, like, maybe just focus on defense.

[Mal]

Yeah, like, yeah, I promised the elephant walk was not gonna happen.

[Rory]

How's the old line? Like.

[Julian]

But I think that elephant walk, that's different.

[Damaris]

Oh, this is like an actual elephant.

[Julian]

That's the actual elephant. That's not the hazing one where you got to do it with your dicks tied in a knot.

[Mal]

Yo, that is crazy.

[Rory]

Cabba is a non hazing organization. It has never hazed. But if they did haze there, all the stuff has, like, real historical references to it. I'm just not quite sure what grabbing another man's dick could really do with the history of your frat.

[Mal]

No, it's called buck breaking, right? Is that what they call it?

[Rory]

Something like, I learned that because of Andrew Schultz.

[Mal]

Oh, okay.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Know about that before for no. Oh, wow.

[Mal]

See, history, the fact that they try to turn.

[Rory]

Thank you.

[Mal]

Andrew said into that.

[Julian]

Hey, we ain't talking about.

[Rory]

All right, so I have advice for this. This young lady. Outside of your man definitely being gay, I think you should lean all the way into it and get in on the jokes. But not with your man, but with his friends. Like, if you want be part of the crew, if this is all fun and games, then let me do the kissing game with your man ass. Let me take. Let me take a fucking cucumber and stick it down your throat. Just lean into it. See how funny he finds it when you get involved in the game.

[Mal]

Yeah, Bailey, you got to have a real conversation with your boyfriend.

[Julian]

Wendy Williams has the perfect sound bite for this. And I always just try to send this to girls when they're really in denial, but this is the.

[Rory]

Lucy, stop it.

[Julian]

Denial is a river in Egypt. Your husband is gay.

[Rory]

He's a. Guys, if you. Wendy Williams. When I was a kid, Wendy Williams Had a gay list. Do you remember that? She walked around with folded paper of gay men in the industry.

[Julian]

Was Diddy on it though?

[Damaris]

I'm sure he's probably the list.

[Rory]

Yeah, yeah. I mean top of the list.

[Damaris]

I'm just talking about it.

[Julian]

Hindsight is 20 20. Like if we go back when he's gay list, like was Diddy on it?

[Rory]

I'mma sound too woke or whatever. But why was that a thing? Like why was it this crazy if somebody was gay and what. And Wendy is now like, you know why.

[Julian]

Back in the day it was a big thing. Let's not act like homophobia was not insane back then.

[Mal]

I don't even think it was being gay part. I think it was people that were down low. Yeah, that was like, yo, why y'all business is that just come out the closet like you sitting here like, would.

[Rory]

I have to do that for so I can appease Wendy Williams?

[Mal]

No, no, I agree with you, but I'm just saying that's more so what it was was guys that were because.

[Rory]

Because Wendy and I mean prayers to her because I know her health is not in great shape, but she started to go more on the woker side of things. Like we not gonna remember when you were homophobic as trying to like out men for being gay. Like what was wrong with that? Yeah, explain to me why that that should be a thing than Wendy, if.

[Mal]

You'Re so progressive, you're not too gay.

[Damaris]

Okay, so this, this poor. There's a poor caller here. Her gay Mexican boyfriend. What. What do we do here? Do they.

[Rory]

I said participate in the games.

[Mal]

Tell them, hey, listen, it's not funny. Is there a conversation you want to have or something you want to tell me?

[Damaris]

What if she asked one of her homeboy, one of his friends was like, again, if she has to be open and into this, be like, oh, why don't we like have a threesome if you're really about it. Let me you with one of your friends.

[Rory]

I mean, I said just participate in the games. But if you want to take it to the next level, sure.

[Damaris]

Since you want to play with his dick so bad, let's each other.

[Mal]

And she says she's bisexual too, right?

[Rory]

Okay, but they're all men.

[Julian]

I'm reading the list. I'm sorry. Wendy's Williams list and she's writing up everybody downright. She says it says of course Will Smith. Everybody else, his name is just their name. And it says of course Will Smith. That is hilarious.

[Damaris]

Who else is on it?

[Julian]

Busta Red man. And Method Man. But I think Method man broke her heart. That's probably how he made it bus.

[Rory]

She did some real foul to his wife.

[Julian]

Yeah, Busta Meth.

[Rory]

Red man and Method man are not gay.

[Julian]

Busta. How you know?

[Rory]

Oh, fair. Okay.

[Julian]

Buster. Red Man, Method Man, Q tip. Puffy does it for control. I think Dr. Dre is straight up smoke that. Dr. Dre is straight up living a big lie. Tyrese hit Cisco for coming onto him in the studio. I think MC Light hit him or hit him for coming on to him. I think MC Light is still with Pam from Martin. Russell Simmons throws gay parties. I heard things about ll too. Marlon Wayans. Not Sean like you would think. Of course. Will Smith, Tyson Beckford, Chris Weber, Steve Francis. Mobley guy from Houston. Damian from Portland. This is a Keno Mobley.

[Damaris]

Just saying Mobley guy from Houston.

[Rory]

That's a deep cut.

[Damaris]

It's hilarious.

[Rory]

Just casino Mobley on that list is fucking.

[Mal]

No, she didn't say Catino Mobley. She said Mobley guy from back court.

[Rory]

Of the Houston Rockets at that time.

[Mal]

What?

[Rory]

So Steve Francis and Katino Mobley were.

[Damaris]

They have great chemistry.

[Rory]

They amazing back court.

[Julian]

And then she says there's a crew of bisexual actresses that hang out together. Most of them are married. They include Jada Pinket, Jasmine Guy, CRE Summer, Tina Arnold, Tisha Campbell. Debbie. Debbie Allen, who apparently turned out the whole cast of A Different World. I'm not believing that about Debbie Allen.

[Mal]

Wow.

[Julian]

Y not gonna that Debbie.

[Rory]

I just said red man is not gay. And you said, how you know.

[Julian]

But Debbie Allen turning out the whole cast. I'm pretty sure he's.

[Mal]

How you know that?

[Julian]

You're right. I didn't say she wasn't. I just said I don't want to believe it. I'm not reading that.

[Mal]

Read it.

[Julian]

No. Something about Beyonce. Alicia Keys does, I repeat, does have a boyfriend. Whether or not it's a cover up, I don't know. But the both of them seem really serious about each other.

[Damaris]

The shot of Beyonce had nothing to do with her sexual preference.

[Julian]

No, it wasn't.

[Damaris]

What it have to do with her breath.

[Mal]

Oh, that.

[Rory]

I mean, but that's been a thing.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Julian]

I didn't know that that was a thing. And I'm not reading that. Kelly Roland is a nice person, but I think she's a lesbian.

[Damaris]

Why does that m. Why does that change your opinion?

[Julian]

Well, because this was back. Back in the day. Like, it wasn't cute and like, people got made fun of for being lesbians. Like, it wasn't Like a cute.

[Damaris]

If you're a Kelly Roland type lesbian, you're all right.

[Rory]

What type of lesbian is that?

[Damaris]

A good looking one.

[Rory]

Okay, gotcha.

[Julian]

So you're.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

There's a double standard phobic. Yeah, we all are pretty. Lesbians are obviously more favored in the culture.

[Rory]

Taylor looked like a bad bitch on Saturday night.

[Damaris]

We don't know what you talk about Taylor. We don't have to single her out.

[Julian]

One dyke friend. I'm not. I'm not.

[Damaris]

I'm not throwing that out there.

[Rory]

I voted for Obama.

[Damaris]

He voted against gay marriage.

[Mal]

None of these people.

[Rory]

Who on that list do you believe?

[Julian]

Well, I don't know half these people.

[Rory]

Oh, no.

[Damaris]

This sounds pretty well researched and, like, honest. And I feel like Maul.

[Rory]

Just because Q Tip has a high voice doesn't mean he's gay.

[Damaris]

I don't think that's why she said.

[Mal]

Yeah, I don't think it was.

[Rory]

The voice is why he made Bonita Apple Bomb.

[Mal]

He did.

[Rory]

That wasn't about a dude.

[Mal]

You don't know.

[Julian]

Did he need May I need a girl?

[Damaris]

He didn't write that.

[Mal]

He didn't write that.

[Rory]

That was. That was Loon's work. Loon needed a girl.

[Mal]

He didn't write that.

[Rory]

Yeah, I'm sure there's a bunch of truth to that. Wendy knew her, but she also did a bunch of. And lied a lot.

[Mal]

So saying the Mobley guy from Houston is still funny, though.

[Rory]

Insane.

[Mal]

Like you couldn't just say Katino Mobley. Mobley guy.

[Rory]

I never heard Steve Francis was. This is. Who cares? Shout out to Katina Mobley. Do we have another voicemail?

[Mal]

If you want to stay.

[Rory]

There's nothing wrong with.

[Julian]

Wait, wait, wait, wait. One more, one more, one more. Allen Iverson is rude. He told us he hated white girls and refused to tip one at the strip club one night.

[Mal]

I love that.

[Julian]

I believe that.

[Damaris]

That sounds like.

[Mal]

There.

[Damaris]

Yeah, that sounds like AI.

[Mal]

Yeah. They ain't putting no gay on his jacket.

[Rory]

He was ahead of. Ahead of his time.

[Damaris]

Yo, the answer right there. All right. The next one I'm about to play is from a new batch that came in over the last couple of days. I haven't heard it, so let's just see what happens.

[Mal]

Yo, Julian, you don't have to put this on the show.

[Damaris]

But we won't. Next one. Because that's usually not a good start. Here we go.

[Mal]

Yo, this is B Wrecker out of Cleveland, and I'm gonna get my money's worth.

[Rory]

Okay?

[Mal]

All right, I got two questions, totally unrelated. Number one, y'all New Yorkers. So y'all seen some things, y'all heard some things? Not me.

[Damaris]

Jesus.

[Mal]

What's the most unattractive accent y'all ever heard on a female? Foreign or domestic? It don't matter. And question number two, top three Biggie features. Not. Not singles, not album cuts. Features. Where he is the guest. It's your top three, Rory. Ma, I'm really. I really want to hear.

[Rory]

He didn't do a lot of opinions on this.

[Mal]

All right, I'm out.

[Rory]

Oh.

[Mal]

P.S. the reason our team is called the Guardians is because of the Hope Memorial Bridge. Statues on that joint are called Guardians.

[Rory]

Look it up.

[Mal]

All right, peace.

[Damaris]

Some Cleveland history right there.

[Mal]

Top three Biggie features.

[Rory]

What do you want to do? The first part or Biggie first?

[Mal]

What was the first part?

[Damaris]

Least attractive female accent. What part of the country world. What's like, the worst?

[Mal]

Oh, I like all accents. I just love anything that doesn't sound like my own hometown. I. I appreciate.

[Rory]

I hate to say it. Baltimore is definitely up there, but there's. There's something charming about it.

[Mal]

That's what I'm saying.

[Rory]

I just don't know how long.

[Mal]

I just think it's dope to hear.

[Rory]

It'd be cute for a while.

[Mal]

But different accent, like, speak. It's like, okay, okay.

[Rory]

At St. Peter's they had, like. Remember I told you guys, they had, like, weird Eastern European exchange students that lived there year round. Those girls. Sometimes it was a little weird, like, I don't know how long I could.

[Damaris]

A proper Eastern European is, like, also, like, scary and intimidating.

[Rory]

And like, when I was in high school, I watched, like, the Sopranos and all the strippers had that accent. That's not accurate to real life. Those Eastern European women sounded like men. One of my. My freshman year roommate. I'm not going to say his name because I'm about to reveal something. He was fucking one of them. And we used to, you know, we. We would have a system if somebody was getting some pussy. Like, you just chill in the hallway.

[Mal]

Take a walk, man.

[Rory]

Danny was next door, yo, he's in there doing that. But this is also Jersey City in 2008. The infrastructure of the buildings, the walls were pretty fucking thin.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Yo, when she used to fucking moan. And I wish. Wish I would do the impression, but I would have to say his name. Pause.

[Julian]

No, do it, Sylvester.

[Rory]

Like, she would yell that throughout the hallways. And we. Yo, when I tell you.

[Mal]

We would.

[Rory]

Be dying laughing outside that. Yo, what is he doing to her?

[Mal]

He's eating the bunker. That's who he was.

[Rory]

Yeah. Eastern European. I forgot which, like, part they were from, but. Oh, Archie, they were. And, like, her voice would go in and out, too. I don't know if that was part of the accent, but the volume on her voice, even when she just spoke.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Would go in and out like. Like, you know when. Like a headphone cord.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Like connect all the time. That's how she would talk.

[Mal]

That's hilarious.

[Rory]

So that's probably what was the second part of his.

[Julian]

Your top three Biggie features.

[Mal]

Top three Biggie features. Well, it's Bone and Biggie.

[Rory]

Biggie wasn't the tourist thugs on Life After Death, though, was it? Yeah, I don't think that's.

[Julian]

Oh, we can only do.

[Mal]

Oh, so not his.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Okay. So. Okay.

[Damaris]

I see flavor in your ears. Mine?

[Mal]

Yeah, flavor in your ear, obviously.

[Damaris]

Mine.

[Rory]

Real love the remix.

[Mal]

The joint with 112. Only you.

[Julian]

Yeah, I'm gonna go with Crush on you.

[Mal]

And wait, was he on only you? Was Big on Only you? Was that only you?

[Julian]

He had one with them, but I don't know if it was only you.

[Damaris]

Yep, you're right.

[Julian]

It was. Yeah.

[Mal]

Total. Can't you see? That's definitely one of Big's best features for me.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

All right.

[Rory]

We're naming a lot here. Brooklyn's finest. Number one for sure. For me.

[Mal]

Rest in peace, Clark.

[Rory]

Are we. Are we going to count the ones post death?

[Damaris]

I traditionally do not count those.

[Mal]

Yeah. Because I don't know if Big would have.

[Rory]

Yeah, okay. Brooklyn's fine.

[Mal]

Might have tweaked the verse like a ball.

[Damaris]

What's that one, though, that he does have post that? That I love. It's on that Nelly album. He goes. I go on and on and on. Is that was a remix of a.

[Rory]

Big song that was around.

[Mal]

Yeah, But I like the duets.

[Rory]

Was all songs we'd heard. They just remixed them.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Just added features to it. Like, Nasty Girl was a.

[Damaris]

Yes. Nasty Girl.

[Rory]

That was from Life After Death. They just remixed it and threw Nelly on it. Like, I like 1970 something with game. But it's on Ready to Die already. It's the outro Total only I don't know what my number three would be.

[Julian]

You said Real Love remix.

[Rory]

I don't know if that's over. Some of the Junior Mafia, like, grab your titties. If you love hip hop, that's technically a feature. No, Junior Mafia. He wasn't in Junior Mafia. It's featuring Big.

[Julian]

Yeah, that makes sense.

[Rory]

Victory. Big does have more Features than I remembered. I felt like he never did features.

[Mal]

All right, well that was a cool. I love the dough too with Jay.

[Rory]

That's on Life after death though.

[Mal]

Oh, not his song.

[Rory]

Yeah, yeah.

[Damaris]

Damaris. Back to the first question. Is there a male accent or region of the world that you can't stand?

[Julian]

Y'all know I don't. I'm not a fan of the inants.

[Damaris]

Oh, yeah, that's true. You do hate them.

[Julian]

I do not hate them. I just don't like the accent.

[Mal]

British.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

I hate British accents. I'm like the only girl in the world who does. Cuz everybody I know loves. They're like, oh my God. British boys. Brit boy. I'm like, I hate that accent. I can't even listen to them talk.

[Rory]

I love it on women. You didn't like when Gigs was here. I feel like that's your type.

[Julian]

Gigs is. Why do you think that, G? You think every dark skinned man that walk in here is my type? Gigs is not my type.

[Rory]

First of all, all dark skinned men that have possibly committed crime in the past.

[Mal]

There you go.

[Rory]

Forgot to add the second part of it.

[Julian]

Gigs is a sweetie pie. But no, that accent, I could not listen. You. I can't. Oh my God.

[Damaris]

No, really, Really. I don't mind UK accent at all to listen to. It's not like annoying when he talks.

[Julian]

If imagine now imagine him, you.

[Damaris]

I wouldn't do that.

[Rory]

I have not thought about not going to imagine that.

[Damaris]

That doesn't cross my mind.

[Mal]

Well then go get the cucumber and do that.

[Rory]

Do that trick.

[Damaris]

Where's homie? The Mexican friends. Yeah, where they at?

[Rory]

Bring the Mexicans, bring gigs and let's have a party.

[Julian]

Bring the Mexicans, bring gigs. But yeah, no, that's just. That's my least favorite accent. But the best accent, especially on men and women is Louisiana. That. That New Orleans. No Orleans.

[Rory]

I know, I like it. Don't get me wrong.

[Julian]

Women. Oh my God. Toya, Louain, babe, Mama. You ever heard talk?

[Rory]

Of course. Texas is good too.

[Julian]

Cool.

[Rory]

All of the south is all right. Me, to be quite honest, I love a southern accent. Yeah, Florida gets a little weird, but I don't think Florida's the South. I think it's a different country.

[Mal]

Did you ever see them? It's a video out and I forgot the lady that did it and she actually ties in like a lot of the accents and how they originated. That was a very dope video. If you haven't seen that, like, check that out.

[Rory]

Have you ever dealt with Like a German chick. I never have, so I assume that would be, like, aggressive.

[Damaris]

Damn.

[Rory]

Feel like sex would feel anti Semitic. Semitic. Without even bringing up the Jew.

[Mal]

Just because of their accent.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

I like Russian accents.

[Rory]

All her reactions to dick would sound like Hitler to me.

[Julian]

Russian accents are, like, nice on women. I like women with Russian accents and Transylvanian accents. Like the ones who sound like vampires. I like that accent.

[Rory]

So many underground strip clubs and poker accents.

[Julian]

Wait, is Transylvania real? It is, right? It's a real place.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

I like, like, that accent from that corner of the world where it's like they sound like vampire.

[Mal]

What was your favorite movie growing up?

[Julian]

Bad Boys 2. Titanic. Bram Stoker's drag.

[Mal]

Bad Boys 2.

[Damaris]

You keep.

[Mal]

That's. That's like when homie said Busta Rhymes was his favorite rapper.

[Julian]

How is. Bad Boys 2 is an amazing movie, especially when you're a kid.

[Mal]

Yeah. But for. For a woman to say that's one of her favorite movies, that's just like.

[Julian]

Yeah, I know that movie. Like, I could perform it, like, as a monologue.

[Damaris]

Oh, that's.

[Rory]

There's a love story in there, too.

[Julian]

It's an amazing movie. You don't.

[Mal]

I love Bad Boys, too. I'm not saying that, but that's Bad Boys. I never heard a woman say, nah, that's one of my favorite movies.

[Julian]

That's my favorite.

[Rory]

You liked it till you saw Wendy Williams Gay List. And then you were like, I can't. I can't fuck with this.

[Mal]

No, I like Batman.

[Damaris]

Of course. Will Smith.

[Julian]

I'm a huge Will Smith fan, though. But even before, like, that's probably one of the reasons why I am a huge Will Smith.

[Mal]

How come you never played none of his new music?

[Julian]

I mean, it's not really for me.

[Damaris]

Oh, he put out a new record.

[Julian]

I don't think I'm his target audience.

[Damaris]

Every time he puts out a new song.

[Mal]

You don't think his biggest fans and his are his target audience every time.

[Damaris]

He puts out a new record?

[Mal]

You just said you're his biggest fan.

[Julian]

I said one of his biggest fans of, like, his acting.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

So you're his target audience. Oh, no, you didn't say of his acting. You said, will you like Will Smith?

[Julian]

I do like Will Smith. I even like the song he did with Bad Bunny and. And Mark Anthony. Like, that's one of my. That was, like, one of my favorite songs of that year, and I feel like it didn't get a play, but I don't really like this.

[Damaris]

Mol, you're bugging if you're not feeling this new track holding me ransom why.

[Mal]

Does my fear control me at random Life can get ugly but I'm handsome I'm about to face all the I've been running from. You might relate to the places I'm coming from. I've been through trauma I thought I'd recover from. I got regrets.

[Damaris]

You heard about some of them.

[Mal]

This is going to make my hot.

[Rory]

I like Russ's verse on their song.

[Damaris]

That'S a shot at you.

[Julian]

I hate to be the thing that people suffer from.

[Rory]

I'm flattered when I. When that happens.

[Damaris]

You didn't even pee, Mom.

[Mal]

I didn't. You my first time seeing that. Thank you.

[Julian]

He's got it.

[Damaris]

He's back.

[Julian]

He. The crazy is though, is that Will Smith is not a bad rapper. He's still nice.

[Damaris]

He can do 50, 000 in Africa. Yeah.

[Rory]

You think he's writing that?

[Damaris]

Hell no.

[Rory]

Come on.

[Mal]

They don't think that.

[Rory]

I can hear a Simba flow from a mile away.

[Mal]

They don't think so.

[Julian]

Did Simba tell you that he wrote that?

[Rory]

I have not spoken to Simba.

[Julian]

Okay. So until then, Will wrote it the.

[Rory]

Same way they bite child's drums, they bite Simba's flow.

[Mal]

This is who's on that song with him?

[Rory]

I. I think that's just Joiner Lucas.

[Mal]

Oh, Joiner wrote it.

[Rory]

Oh, then Joiner wrote it? Yeah.

[Damaris]

This sound I was going to flow. Is it Joiner Lucas flow?

[Mal]

Yeah. Jo wrote that.

[Julian]

I think Will wrote it.

[Mal]

Let me promise you what Will didn't do.

[Julian]

You think Will can't write?

[Mal]

I think Will didn't write that record.

[Julian]

Why?

[Mal]

Because Will's not writing raps anymore.

[Julian]

Why do you think that?

[Mal]

Cuz Will has never rapped like that.

[Julian]

Just because you changed the way that you rap doesn't mean that you're no longer writing how you rap.

[Mal]

That's exactly what I was going to say.

[Julian]

No, that doesn't.

[Mal]

When you're 60 years old, that is exactly what that means, bro.

[Julian]

He can change his flow. It's not hard to change.

[Mal]

But no, you don't change your flow at 60 Demaris.

[Damaris]

Why not?

[Julian]

He's not gonna go on that beat and try to rap like he did in fucking.

[Mal]

He's not gonna go on that beat. He's gonna show up to the studio, having that record sent to him two weeks prior and lay his vocals.

[Rory]

All right. Outside of writing that shit Summertime era, has Will Smith ever wrote his raps?

[Mal]

I don't think so. That's what I'M supposed to.

[Julian]

Yes, he did. Whoever told you that Will Smith didn't write his raps?

[Rory]

What he wrote Willems was written by Nas. That's on record. You said what was Willennium. That album. That's great.

[Julian]

The entire record was written by Nas.

[Rory]

Most of it is from Naj.

[Damaris]

Yeah, and that's from 99.

[Julian]

Okay, let's go to the writing credits.

[Rory]

There's nothing wrong with that.

[Julian]

Let's just confirm, cuz.

[Rory]

When was the last time that Will was really writing his raps?

[Julian]

When the last time Will was really writing was really rapping?

[Rory]

I'm not discrediting him. I'm just asking.

[Mal]

You think he wrote Getting Jiggy with It?

[Julian]

I think he wrote his bars. I don't think he wrote the chorus.

[Damaris]

He wrote the N. No, I think that's a sample.

[Mal]

The Ill Na na na na.

[Damaris]

He wrote that.

[Mal]

Nah, nah, nah, N. That's a great hook.

[Rory]

Don't do that.

[Julian]

Like thinking that Will Smith just became.

[Rory]

A big rapper because Nas. Nas wrote all of Getting Jiggy with it. This is confirmed.

[Mal]

That's why I just asked her that.

[Damaris]

That's exactly why I just destroyed Damaris's.

[Rory]

Whole tone and poke produced it with Nas. He wrote the entire thing.

[Julian]

So it says Nas wrote it and Will Smith is nowhere. Name. His name isn't named on the writing credits. Is that what you're telling me?

[Rory]

I mean, I'm sure his name is there. He's Will Smith.

[Julian]

Oh, my God.

[Mal]

Will Smith doesn't write. It's okay. Nobody's expecting him to write rhymes. Just keep giving us great films.

[Julian]

So how did Will Smith. Because he came in this game as a writer, literally. So how did Will Smith.

[Rory]

He just bit Julian.

[Julian]

How did Will Smith become Will Smith?

[Rory]

Wanted to be Julian so bad.

[Julian]

He just was cute and they were like, damn, you should be like a rapper.

[Damaris]

Well, at the time he was on.

[Rory]

The show, I was saying, I don't know. The last time he wrote his rhymes outside of the Summertime era, he may have written a Then Jazzy Jeff could have wrote it.

[Damaris]

True.

[Rory]

Also, that was way less taboo back then than it became. Yeah, like rapper's delight. None of them wrote those lyrics. Easy E didn't write anything. They were like, you're the guy that could sell this better than anyone. We'll write it for you. That was pretty regular back in the day. Ghost writing wasn't like this whole, holy shit, you don't write your rhymes thing. That happened later. So, yeah, I don't think it's weird to think that maybe Jazzy Jeff wrote All of Summertime.

[Julian]

Will Smith was addicted to being a. He wanted to be a rapper really, really bad. I don't think he was a good one. I don't think he. Yeah, so that. Okay, but nobody's saying that. Everybody's like, oh, everybody always wrote Will Smith's rhymes. Like, I didn't say that before. I was giving him the Summertime era.

[Rory]

I said after that, because I know for a fact we had Tonan Poke on this podcast that whole millennium era, the fucking Men in Black shit, all that was Nas.

[Julian]

Well, when Men in Black sounds like it was written by somebody else, but. But we ain't gonna discredit Will Smith. Like, he can't write.

[Mal]

Why does that sound like it was written by somebody else but not getting jiggy with it?

[Julian]

I didn't say getting jiggy with. Didn't sound like it was written by somebody else. I'm just saying that I don't think somebody wrote the entire thing for him. That was all I was saying.

[Mal]

It's okay. Will doesn't write his shit. It's all right.

[Julian]

Nobody's expecting. I just feel like it's disrespectful to say that he doesn't write his shit. He's never written his shit. So now that he.

[Mal]

I'm not saying never rapping.

[Julian]

He's not writing anything.

[Mal]

Okay, Bring it back to the original. That verse that we just listened to. Will Smith didn't attempt to write that. He got that record sent to him and said, what time is the session? I'll be there. He laid his vocals. He didn't write that. And it's okay. I'm not expecting Will Smith to write bars.

[Julian]

Fine.

[Mal]

I'm mad. He's still rapping. Let's keep. Let's start there. I would never rap again if I was Will Smith. Are you kidding me?

[Julian]

Well, he. Obviously.

[Rory]

If you're at this point in your career, why not, like, just do what makes you happy and you're passionate, you want to listen.

[Julian]

I've always been passionate about rapping, like, from the very beginning. So why would you not continue to do something you love when you have nothing to lose?

[Mal]

Yeah, but it's just. We just. Just go enjoy life, man.

[Rory]

It's not like Denzel is like, you.

[Mal]

Don'T need these bars.

[Rory]

Will Smith.

[Julian]

People want to hear him. You don't, but that's fine. Other people.

[Mal]

Nobody wants to hear Will Smith rapping.

[Julian]

I bet that video.

[Mal]

I'm not a biggest fan. And you don't want to hear him.

[Damaris]

Rapping 198, 000 people liked it.

[Rory]

That's proof.

[Mal]

Yeah, they. They want to hear it.

[Damaris]

That means they at least acknowledge.

[Rory]

I don't know if I'd go to streaming to listen to a Will Smith song, but on instagram, if I saw a real with a Will Smith verse, I'm gonna stay for the minute 30.

[Mal]

Yeah, because you want to laugh.

[Damaris]

No, I send him in the group every time.

[Mal]

All right, man, it man. No, no, it. I'm the bad guy. It. All right, man. Everybody go stream that Will Smith join a Lucas joint.

[Rory]

Man, that verse he put on that Russ record was one of the funniest verses of 2024.

[Mal]

Nobody wants to hear Will Smith rapidly happened. His biggest fan sitting right here. She don't want to hear it.

[Rory]

His biggest fan.

[Mal]

All right. She said she's his biggest fan.

[Julian]

I did not say I'm his biggest fan. All he do is lie.

[Mal]

What did you just say?

[Julian]

I said I'm a big fan. I'm a huge fan of Will Smith. I didn't say I'm his biggest fan. I did not.

[Mal]

You say you're one of his biggest fans. That's exactly. Possibly that's exactly what you just said. What the fuck are we talking about?

[Rory]

Can't prove that.

[Julian]

No.

[Mal]

All right, man, Never mind.

[Rory]

Did you guys see that clip of Denzel yesterday? I didn't know Denzel was in Mount Vernon like Robin people, they asked Denzel. I forgot what director it was. Stanley Cooper. What's your favorite Stanley Cooper movie?

[Mal]

Stanley Cooper or Stanley.

[Julian]

Stanley Kubrick?

[Mal]

Stanley Kubrick, yeah.

[Rory]

Pardon me. I wasn't born in the 70s. They asked him what his favorite movie was. He said he wasn't really a movie buff like that. He didn't really go to the movies. And he at that time in the 70s, was standing outside the movie theater robbing anyone that came out gangster. I didn't know. Yeah, I wasn't familiar with Denzel like that.

[Mal]

Yeah, back in those days that was.

[Rory]

Common, man, that you'd be robbed by Denzel Washington.

[Mal]

I mean, shit, you seen the homie of Mike Tyson when the J. Paul shit, he went back. Mike Tyson went back to the hood and the dude told him, yeah, you robbed me coming out of Woolworth one time. We was kids. It happens, man. These people have a pass.

[Rory]

People like when yougod said Mike Tyson robbed his mom, I wasn't like, damn, that shocks me, cuz Mike Tyson's a fighter. A troubled youth in Brownsville. Didn't. Didn't shock me.

[Mal]

Okay.

[Rory]

And how he even got into boxing was being arrested and being like, that whole story. No, I didn't know that Denzel was strapped up in Mount Vernon, robbing everyone when he was 22 years old. I just didn't know that he was. I thought he was, like, the face of the Boys and Girls club.

[Mal]

He was 22.

[Damaris]

Oh, I saw that.

[Mal]

At 22, he was robbing people. Yes. He was acting at 22, wasn't he?

[Rory]

He said he started acting at 20, and that was around the same time.

[Mal]

Oh, shit.

[Julian]

I'm leaving here with something.

[Damaris]

Here's the clip of an interview, and.

[Rory]

I decided to go with my Kubrick shirt so I could ask everyone if they have a favorite Kubrick movie.

[Mal]

I'm not a movie buff. No. I'm not a big movie fan. I was in the street when he was making movies.

[Rory]

He was.

[Mal]

What, was the ones in the 70s? Yeah. Yeah. I'd be the one outside looking to rob you when you came out of a Kubrick movie. Okay. So I wasn't a real film buff. I didn't start acting until I was 20 years old and didn't start really going to the movies till I was 20, 22, 23. It's.

[Rory]

That surprised me. I wasn't.

[Mal]

That is, surprised.

[Rory]

I wasn't aware of his game.

[Mal]

Yeah, I know. I knew Denzel was definitely from the hood, and I didn't know he was.

[Rory]

I mean, Mount Vernon is Mount Vernon.

[Mal]

Yeah. I didn't know he was getting in there like that. Yeah, well, that's the money earning part. You gotta go earn money.

[Rory]

Didn't they kind of like, promote Denzel as, like, the son of a preacher? And, like, they were like, the staple of the community and positive. A positive family.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

I don't know. He had a mask on, like. So he's not acting in Training Day?

[Mal]

No. Method acting, if you will. He's drawn from real life experiences in that part. Yeah. I like hearing shit like that, though. Let us know that you had a real passion Fast.

[Julian]

What's your favorite Stanley Kubrick movie? Do you guys have one?

[Mal]

No.

[Julian]

Eyes Wide Shut would be mine. If any of you guys are not you guys, but listeners.

[Rory]

I like Eyes Wide Shut.

[Julian]

Eyes Wide Shut is.

[Rory]

I haven't seen Eyes Wide Shut in a while.

[Damaris]

Yeah, the Shining is a tough out for me.

[Mal]

No, Full Metal Jacket was good.

[Rory]

Do you think they sacrificed their baby at the end of Eyes? Watch it?

[Julian]

No, no.

[Mal]

Is that like a rabbit hole you went down on YouTube?

[Rory]

No, I was watching them. I think it may have been Like a Rogan interview. I forgot who he was interviewing that the original. Because he ended up dying before the movie was put out. And the original script with that scene when they're going away from the baby, it's showing that they did sacrifice their baby. That is the true ending of that movie.

[Damaris]

I need to revisit Eyes Wide Shut. It's been a very long time.

[Julian]

Yeah, I want to just read the puff paperwork.

[Rory]

Same thing, just with Max.

[Damaris]

Lolita is a classic. Just want to give that it's a proper shout out.

[Rory]

Shining is great, great book. 2001 on the low is. Is pretty good.

[Julian]

I've never seen that one.

[Rory]

Clockwork Orange. Maybe I had to be there. I don't love it the way like my dad like reveres it and it's cool, don't get me wrong. But it's like one of those classics that I just never really got fully into. It's okay. It's cool.

[Julian]

That's how Kia felt about when we watched Atlanta.

[Rory]

Clockwork Orange.

[Damaris]

Orange.

[Rory]

It's the same thing.

[Mal]

ATL's a classic.

[Rory]

It is a classic. It's my Clockwork Orange.

[Mal]

Okay. All right, well, you guys have fun at the Dreamville tonight. Hope you have plenty of dreams and your dreams come true. And Rory, I guess you're gonna watch it on the stream.

[Rory]

Yeah. I love that album.

[Mal]

Yeah, no, it's a great album. Classic album.

[Rory]

Does he do the same set with the house on the side or a.

[Damaris]

Whole new thousand percent? Gonna be the same, man.

[Rory]

It's a 10 year anniversary. Gotta do something different than just redo the tour.

[Damaris]

No, don't change a single thing. He'll have dreads now. That's the difference.

[Mal]

That is the difference.

[Julian]

Yo, Maul. Look. Maul.

[Mal]

What?

[Julian]

Just.

[Mal]

I said that is the difference. He didn't have dreads last time when he was sitting on the roof. Yeah, like that. He was just starting. He just growing his throat right there. Look, look.

[Julian]

Yeah, so I think I'm going to. I don't know. I think I'm going to cry. No, I'm definitely going to cry. I don't think I'm going to cry.

[Mal]

You going to try to meet some new dick at a JCOLE show?

[Julian]

Well, why.

[Rory]

I think that'd be a good place.

[Julian]

Why you frame it like that?

[Damaris]

We tried to set her up with one of the fiends before.

[Rory]

That's true.

[Damaris]

A couple times actually.

[Mal]

Yeah. I don't love Damaris.

[Rory]

Yes.

[Julian]

I try to set me up with a fiend they hate. They don't like me.

[Mal]

Talk.

[Damaris]

These are good people.

[Rory]

The fiends.

[Mal]

What are we talking about, man?

[Damaris]

It's true.

[Rory]

I got an interesting text from somebody based off a conversation that Damaris and I were having on this POD or Patreon. I forgot what it was about. Your love life. He hit me. Like, confirmed. She does like me. I'm still blocking because I care about Damaris. I think he's a great guy.

[Julian]

I just don't think about him. How did he assume that that was about him?

[Rory]

It was pretty obvious. And I wasn't talking. Like, I didn't think he would hear it, but whatever. Yeah, I still stand by. I'm not going to do that to my friends. I think he's an amazing guy. And if he ends up being single, I'll be. I'll be the third wheel.

[Mal]

Wait, so if he ends up being single. So he's not single now?

[Julian]

He's in a relationship.

[Mal]

And Damaris. You was trying to hook Damaris up with him?

[Rory]

No, it was the opposite.

[Mal]

Damaris wanted you to hook him up with her. He hook her up with him.

[Rory]

He has a crush on Damaris.

[Damaris]

Trying to line up his neck.

[Rory]

And then I later found out that, you know, she didn't have a crush on him, but find him attractive.

[Damaris]

Dude.

[Rory]

Yeah, Definitely her type and a great guy, but I'm not about to, like. I don't want to get involved.

[Mal]

No. You got a girl.

[Rory]

Yeah. So I'm not. I'm not. Because I care about James. If I didn't, I'd be like, yo, you should beat.

[Damaris]

You should that home up be a home record.

[Rory]

Go ahead and beat.

[Julian]

No. And I appreciate Rory looking out for me. That's. That's dope.

[Mal]

That's dope.

[Rory]

If it doesn't work out, man, have.

[Mal]

Fun at Forest Hills. Madison Square Gardens.

[Rory]

I think that's a good place to find. Find a decent.

[Julian]

Be full of my types.

[Damaris]

She'll be bagging something, you know, you can expect from me. Mall. A new photo on Invisaligns. I'm going to bring my camera. Something's going to get shot tonight, respectfully, with a camera.

[Rory]

That caption is going to. Wow. Can't believe it's been 10 years.

[Julian]

Oh, my God.

[Rory]

Like, I was just there on January 28th.

[Damaris]

Around the decade.

[Mal]

All right, listen, I'm not bringing it up after this. I just need to know the date one more time. What was the date at Dreamville when he made the speech?

[Julian]

April 5th. Fifth.

[Mal]

April 5th. All right, cool. Just gotta remember that date. I just want to remember that date, that's all. All right, well, have fun tonight.

[Damaris]

Why?

[Mal]

I just need to remember that date I forgot. What date? That happened.

[Damaris]

Why do you need to know that?

[Mal]

That was a. Yeah, that was a big day in hip hop. That was a big deal in hip hop. All right, well, have fun tonight, man. I'm sure it's gonna be a great show and we'll hear about it.

[Damaris]

Seventh.

[Julian]

Oh, the seventh. Not the. Not the fourth.

[Mal]

April 7th.

[Damaris]

Yeah, okay.

[Mal]

April 7th. Seventh. All right, well, I'm sure you'll be streaming. Yeah, watch.

[Rory]

I like watching concerts on stream.

[Mal]

All right, well, have fun tonight. Be safe, be blessed. We'll talk to y'all soon.

[Rory]

We'll see y'all little sister, later tonight.

[Mal]

I'm. That Nick.

[Damaris]

He's just there.

[Mal]

Peace, man.

[Rory]

No worrying.

[Julian]

M.