Episode 248 | Podcast Multiverse Of Madness

Summary

Episode 248 | Podcast Multiverse Of Madness – A Deep Dive into Relationships, Celeb Gossip, and More

Released on March 5, 2024, "New Rory & MAL" delivers Episode 248, "Podcast Multiverse Of Madness," a lively and multifaceted discussion hosted by Rory, Mal, Damaris, and Julian. This episode traverses a broad spectrum of topics, including celebrity antics, intricate relationship dynamics, love languages, and a touch of political banter, all woven together with the show's signature humor and candidness.

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1. Celebrity Antics and Humorous Skits

The episode kicks off with a humorous skit revolving around Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, setting a playful tone for the discussions to follow.

• Rory (00:00): "The Rock. Look, your girl face. You got to just, like, you know, I mean, it's over."
• Mal (00:03): "I would have to. My ego would have to get bruised that day."

The group humorously debates the scenario of confronting The Rock after a hypothetical mishap involving one's significant other, blending comedy with light-hearted banter.

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2. Relationship Trust and Celebrity Breakdowns

A significant portion of the episode delves into the complexities of trust within relationships, especially under public scrutiny. The hosts dissect a recent interview involving Kelsey Nicole and discussions surrounding Meek Mill and Kai, a prominent streamer.

• Mal (01:43): "She does believe that Los Angeles has cameras."
• Rory (05:06): "I just think I'm done with this whole story, honestly."

The conversation highlights the challenges of maintaining trust and transparency, using celebrity relationships as a backdrop for broader relational insights.

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3. Listener Voicemails: Navigating Workplace Appreciation

The episode features listener voicemails addressing relationship issues, with Gina from New York presenting a scenario about receiving unwanted flowers from a coworker.

• Julian (102:48): "My older coworker gave me flowers after I helped wrap up her chart... So am I rude for not taking them home?"

The hosts offer varied perspectives on the appropriateness of gestures in the workplace, emphasizing the importance of understanding individual preferences and communication styles.

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4. Exploring Love Languages in Professional Settings

Building on the voicemail discussion, the hosts venture into the concept of love languages within workplace dynamics. They debate the appropriateness of physical touch, quality time, and words of affirmation in professional relationships.

• Damaris (111:28): "I like verbal appreciation because it sounds like this is just a coworker thing."
• Rory (111:12): "Shut the up. Don't say nothing to me."

This segment underscores the delicate balance between professionalism and personal expression, illustrating how differing love languages can impact workplace interactions.

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5. Political Commentary and Pop Culture References

Interwoven with personal and relational discussions, the hosts touch upon political figures and pop culture, reflecting on public persona and media influence.

• Rory (60:52): "I love when those types of people pop out and show their faces. I'm like, okay, y'all out there."
• Mal (84:35): "But I think it's a cool freestyle. I love it."

These exchanges offer a glimpse into the hosts' viewpoints on political events and their intersections with entertainment, providing a nuanced take on current affairs.

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6. Personal Anecdotes and Group Dynamics

Throughout the episode, the hosts share personal stories and engage in playful ribbing, showcasing their camaraderie and individual personalities.

• Julian (86:37): "He threw ferrets at me when I was sleeping."
• Rory (121:18): "Shut the up. Don't say nothing to me."

These interactions not only entertain but also reveal the underlying support and understanding among the hosts, reinforcing the podcast's engaging and relatable atmosphere.

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7. Upcoming Events and Promotions

Towards the end of the episode, the hosts promote upcoming events and express excitement about future projects.

• Rory (62:54): "March 23, Howard Theater, newroarimal.com Now tickets are available."
• Mal (112:04): "Just let me know before you do this interview."

Listeners are encouraged to participate in upcoming shows, fostering a sense of community and anticipation for future content.

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Conclusion

Episode 248 of "New Rory & MAL" offers a rich tapestry of discussions, seamlessly blending humor, personal insights, and topical commentary. Whether navigating the murky waters of relationship trust, dissecting celebrity antics, or pondering the nuances of love languages in professional settings, the hosts provide an engaging and thought-provoking listening experience. Through their candid conversations and infectious chemistry, Rory, Mal, Damaris, and Julian invite listeners into their dynamic multiverse, making "Podcast Multiverse Of Madness" a compelling addition to their podcast repertoire.

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For those who haven't tuned in yet, this episode is a must-listen for its authentic conversations and the hosts' unique ability to intertwine humor with meaningful discussions. Don't miss out on future episodes by subscribing to "New Rory & MAL" on your preferred podcast platform.

Transcript

[Rory]

The Rock. Look, your girl face. You got to just, like, you know, I mean, it's over.

[Mal]

I would have to. My ego would have to get bruised that day.

[Rory]

You fighting the Rock?

[Mal]

No.

[Damaris]

Hell no.

[Rory]

I. I'm going outside.

[Mal]

I would look at my girl and say, yo, your face just got licked. Here, here's a napkin.

[Julian]

Here.

[Mal]

You want some Purell? Like, I don't know what to tell you.

[Damaris]

Well, you.

[Mal]

You. We got to take this L together.

[Rory]

I have a baby wife in the car.

[Mal]

We could just leave.

[Damaris]

What.

[Rory]

What if it happened?

[Mal]

If you're uncomfortable, we could just leave. No warrior now.

[Damaris]

Like, damn, why?

[Rory]

But I get a like yarn I'm a drop top the sun won't burn.

[Julian]

When it lit like what but the.

[Rory]

Stripes ain't earned Imma get it right now I ain't waiting no turn Got a brand new house trying to avoid my hurt today. You will crumble. Yo, what's up with you in that sound bite?

[Mal]

It's the funniest thing in the world to me. That's not funny to you?

[Rory]

What?

[Mal]

That's to just have a grown adult outside of a courtroom screaming, Roc Nation. You will crumble.

[Rory]

That. That is very funny, especially when it's like, huh?

[Mal]

Because you're so.

[Rory]

Why are you throwing us.

[Mal]

What do we have to do with this?

[Rory]

Nothing to do with. Everybody's at their office in their cubicles minding their business.

[Mal]

Speaking of which, how come Kai hasn't done an interview with Meek for the rollout?

[Damaris]

Oh, wow.

[Julian]

Really, Rory?

[Damaris]

There we go.

[Mal]

What? Meek just put out music. Kai is a prominent streamer. You don't see the connection there? Do they have anything else in common?

[Damaris]

Filters?

[Rory]

Yeah. No. Well, not that I know of. You sound like you got some news.

[Mal]

I don't have any news.

[Rory]

Oh, you know, people allude to, and it's like, okay, tell me what's going on.

[Mal]

I feel bad for Meek because Kai is being fake exposed as being gay, and no one's up in arms the same way Meek was. Well, is it because Puff's not in the video?

[Damaris]

I was gonna say one's someone being sassy on Snapchat, while other one allegedly got by a hip music mogul.

[Mal]

Well, then I would say Meek is probably a head of the game than Kai. I mean, if we're going to compare the two and their gayness, Meek has reached the top. But again, I don't even know if that was really news. We were watching before we started recording the Kelsey interview that I thought was about to be like Dateline.

[Rory]

Man, I Saw the trailer for that, man. They had the first 48 music behind on the sound. Better that. I said, well, this is about to be crazy.

[Mal]

I thought this was gonna be the OJ If I did it interview that got canned by Fox News.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

I really thought I was at the edge of my seat waiting for this.

[Rory]

I still didn't see it. I saw some clips of it, and y'all said y'all watched it.

[Mal]

The clips you saw is all you need. This was the biggest waste of fucking time I've ever watched.

[Rory]

Okay, so Megan, Thee, Stallion's ex friend Kelsey Nicole did her first interview with. Do we know the name of the podcast?

[Mal]

I do not know.

[Rory]

Okay, well, shout out to the podcast that she did this with. You said fuck him. Damn.

[Mal]

I'm not taking that stance, but I will say I had to scroll through an hour's worth of Kelsey's background story.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

To even get to maybe the night in question, like, sort of got to.

[Damaris]

The intro is crazy.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Damaris]

I have the pleasure of sitting with, like, what?

[Mal]

Yeah, they said we have the pleasure of the. What did they say what type of guest it was? The caliber. The caliber of guests. All we know is she. Tori, I know nothing about caliber of Geshe. That's not saying I'm. I'm a prize.

[Rory]

That's all most women gotta do these days is just somebody with some status.

[Mal]

But don't say a caliber of guests. And you're honored to have her on the show.

[Rory]

Well, I mean, it could be a caliber. Again, I don't know the platform and the guests that they usually have, this could be their biggest. Guess this probably is their most watched episode. Right. We could. Is that safe to assume this is still. This is a big guest?

[Mal]

I'm not saying it's not a big guest, and I'm not saying I would say no to this interview at all, but I wouldn't intro it, as I am honored to have a caliber of guests like you on our pod today.

[Rory]

Oh, you wouldn't. But, you know, some people would.

[Mal]

I also did not need an hour and a half of her backstory.

[Rory]

Well, I didn't watch it. So tell me what y'all got from it. Did she give us anything that we didn't know?

[Mal]

No. She still has no idea why her and Megan aren't friends.

[Rory]

She doesn't know why her and Megan.

[Mal]

Are friends, why they're not friends anymore.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

Megan fudgeing Tory wasn't the reason they had a fallout, but she still doesn't know the fallout. So you can try to make that math math.

[Rory]

So her.

[Mal]

So they haven't spoken since.

[Rory]

So wait. All right, so we can throw that theory out the window that she found out that night. She did.

[Julian]

No, she said that she said she found out tonight.

[Rory]

Oh, she did. That's when she found out.

[Damaris]

She said she wish. She said she wished she would. That they could have clowned him together instead of what it became.

[Mal]

Yeah. She's like, sis, why don't you come to me? So we could laugh in his face like, yo, we both. Ha ha, Our pussy power.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Like, we on to the next one.

[Rory]

That might have changed everything.

[Mal]

He was gonna. He'd shoot both of them.

[Rory]

He would add a 2, 4. It was like, oh, both of y'all getting popped tonight. Y'all think this is a game. That's up. Don't make me laugh at that. You gotta delete that sound bite. You're the only one with that sound bite even.

[Damaris]

No one has.

[Rory]

Nobody else has that sound bite. Literally nobody else. How does he even get that?

[Mal]

It makes me laugh so much. I. I legitimately screen recorded off YouTube and edit it myself.

[Rory]

It sounds like it. All right, so she said she doesn't know why her and Meg are not friends anymore. She wished that they could have clowned about both of them sleeping with Tori together.

[Mal]

Yeah. Wish Meg just would have came to her and been like, yo, I'm also.

[Rory]

Okay, so what did. What did we get as far as the. The night of events?

[Mal]

Well, Kelsey made it very clear, which. This was new information to me that I wasn't aware of. Apparently in Hollywood, Beverly Hills, Los Angeles in general, There are cameras everywhere.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

So she's suggesting that there should be a video somewhere and that that could relieve her from any of these accusations that she has of her shooting Megan instead of Tory.

[Rory]

She also.

[Mal]

She does believe that Los Angeles has cameras.

[Rory]

Well, that's a safe assumption.

[Mal]

I wasn't aware, so she brought it to my attention.

[Rory]

So she did say that she wished that the video would come out so that her name can be cleared. That's saying a lot.

[Mal]

Yeah, but she's been said that she didn't, of course.

[Damaris]

And she said that night was her last time of her seeing Meg. She hasn't seen her since that night.

[Mal]

But still doesn't know why they're not friends anymore. Because it wasn't because of Tory.

[Rory]

Well, maybe she didn't take the stand. Right.

[Mal]

She didn't take a one puff of her hookah the entire two hours either. Just held the hookah hose in her Hand.

[Rory]

Some. Some body experts would say that's a sign of withholding and. Yeah. Trying to hold on to something.

[Mal]

Well, the way they did the first 48 trailer and she had the hookahose one, I thought it was hilarious that she was doing the serious interview with a hookah.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

But I thought we'd get like some crazy moments where she'd be like. She'd inhale and be like, Tori shot that and like mad smoke would come out.

[Damaris]

Yeah, the smoke events. Yeah.

[Rory]

Like, we would see it right. Coming out of smoke.

[Mal]

She blow the smoke and we would see the reenactment.

[Damaris]

It's the security footage just come to life.

[Rory]

That would have been great in pre production.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

They do deep production for. For the. For the. For. For that team to do that. That would have been fire.

[Mal]

But she didn't even tell a story, so there would been no option for that at all. I know this was just. This was pointless.

[Damaris]

Like, it sucked.

[Mal]

Why she did an interview is beyond me. If she wants to tell her life story, cool. But I.

[Julian]

That's not attention. Attention is why she did.

[Damaris]

No, but she said she's not looking for attention.

[Julian]

Okay. At the end of the day, everybody should have known she couldn't say certain things. You gonna perjure yourself. You can't. You understand and say you don't know who shot Megan. It wasn't me, but I don't know who. I don't know who shot her. So you. She can't say anything else in the interview.

[Rory]

Yeah. And then. And then to say you wish the video would come out so people. So your name could be cleared. I mean, that's saying a lot. So she's clearly taking like, I didn't do that shit.

[Julian]

She said she's been. Said she didn't do it though.

[Rory]

Right. So here she is again saying it, doubling, tripling down on it. But, yeah, I'm just tired of this whole story, honestly. Yeah, like, I mean, it's his saddest day in court. I believe that Tory is still pushing for an appeal.

[Mal]

Hasn't been successful.

[Rory]

Hasn't been successful as of yet. I don't know if it will be successful. But yeah, I'm just. I'm done with this story, though. Like, I'm just kind of. It's been, what, four years?

[Mal]

Something like that?

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Yeah, 20.

[Rory]

20. Yeah, I'm just. I'm off it.

[Julian]

I just want Meg to have some fucking peace.

[Rory]

Omeg got peace. She got Nike endorsements.

[Damaris]

She got a piece of Nike.

[Rory]

She got Planet Fitness endorsement of Nike.

[Mal]

That's what they gave to me.

[Damaris]

I don't know.

[Rory]

Definitely didn't give her a piece of Nike, but she seems to be doing all right. She looked good. She, you know, I mean, then got in the gym. Some people say it's probably that oic. I don't believe that. I believe she really worked out.

[Mal]

Oh, also, Kelsey was rapping along to the Nikki diss. That was big headlines.

[Rory]

Look at what the.

[Damaris]

Yo, man, did you save that sound bite to your phone?

[Mal]

I did not know your computer.

[Rory]

It's a lot of weird, weird shit.

[Julian]

Corny weird.

[Rory]

Yeah. Like, it's like, what the.

[Mal]

You knowing the lyrics to that song is hilarious to me. Like, to rap along to it. Even if it is about you. I still like. Do you think she was riding in her car to that record enough times to know the lyrics?

[Rory]

Well, if you heard if Nikki was to put your name in a song, you would have remembered that bar.

[Damaris]

Broomstick Freestyle.

[Mal]

I probably. I don't watch the clip of her talking about shoving a broomstick in my ass.

[Julian]

So it's not a song.

[Rory]

It's not a song. It's not a freestyle.

[Mal]

You put a beat over it.

[Rory]

That was off that. She. She definite spit that off the head.

[Mal]

That was occupied.

[Rory]

I don't think she wrote that. I think she came in there and just looked at. You look like you get brooms in your ass. Like, I don't know why she chose that, but whatever. But if Nikki was to put your. Put your name in an actual song, you would remember that bar, I guess.

[Mal]

Yeah, you're probably right.

[Rory]

Of course you would.

[Mal]

Not only remember, but if somebody played it, I wouldn't rap along to it.

[Damaris]

Yeah, you would.

[Rory]

Yes, you would.

[Damaris]

Nah, you do that. You be like, Naj.

[Rory]

Yes, you would.

[Damaris]

You'd play like the. Nah, I'm not even.

[Mal]

Yes, well, first of all, who would play it? So if Nicki Minaj had a record about shoving a broomstick in my ass, you think if somebody played it, like, when I walked into the club, I would start rapping along?

[Rory]

Yeah, you would actually tell them to bring the bottles out and play that part of the song when the bottles.

[Julian]

Came out and bring it back, Keep bringing it back.

[Mal]

And I would boof the bottle just to, like, show how committed I was.

[Rory]

Yeah, just like, yo, yo, yo, bar back.

[Damaris]

Where's the broom?

[Rory]

Wait till y'all see what. Wait till y'all see what I'll do with this hookah lamp.

[Julian]

Ew.

[Mal]

I'll make everything in here disappear with one sit.

[Rory]

I'll make Everything in this room disappear.

[Julian]

Don't play with Southwest is sick.

[Mal]

What do you think she would. She would pair that broom with. You think she'd try to do, like, that one flow she does where she'll say something and then put one word at the end of it? Like, would you try to add sweep in there?

[Damaris]

Broomstick. Rhymes with dick. So you could probably get. There would definitely be, like, a flip on a gay pun.

[Rory]

Did we start the.

[Damaris]

The jar.

[Rory]

D word jar yet?

[Mal]

Oh, we should.

[Julian]

No. Yeah.

[Rory]

Julian's in a room.

[Damaris]

How is that? No, because think about what else rhymes with stick.

[Rory]

A lot.

[Damaris]

Brick, pause, kick. Fair. All right.

[Mal]

Brick is a pause.

[Damaris]

Bricked up.

[Mal]

I didn't. I see. I wasn't even thinking of another one.

[Rory]

In the.

[Mal]

In the jar.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Even though you didn't say the word.

[Rory]

Yeah. You're down, too. Yeah, he's down, too.

[Mal]

I think she would try to add some, like, sports line in there and add sweep at the end of it.

[Rory]

I don't know about that, but streaking is sweet.

[Mal]

Yo.

[Rory]

So, Julian, what is this?

[Damaris]

How's this a sweet.

[Rory]

What is this? What is this beef you told me you got? Something happened over the weekend. I know you was outside doing whatever you was doing. So I came in today, and you told me, like, yo, I got beef. I'm like, okay, that's always funny when somebody says they have beef. But what is this beef thing? What happened?

[Damaris]

So Rory Demaris and I, last night were in the Twitter spaces, the community, which is fun. We should. People, if you're listening, join that. It's actually a good time. It's a good hang.

[Mal]

We had a really good time.

[Rory]

And what is the good time that you're having? Twitter spaces.

[Mal]

We just talk about stuff. It was, like, fun to talk with listeners.

[Damaris]

Yeah, it was like, pod music focus at first, and then it was like a hard switch to, like. What do they call it? The freaky questions or some shit like that.

[Rory]

Yeah, off the rails, that shit time.

[Damaris]

That's when I started speaking.

[Rory]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Mal]

He was muted for three hours.

[Damaris]

I was.

[Mal]

Then when I was asked what position I conceived my child in, Julian was like, yeah, let me tell you about this story.

[Damaris]

I unmuted. He said, someone asked Roy, what position did you conceive see of Amara in? And it was like a sliver of silence. And I unmuted and said he was on all fours. Oh, my God, that's funny.

[Rory]

No, it's not. All right, so tell me. So tell me about this beef thing.

[Damaris]

So I. I found out the Girl that I've been seeing. I should really stop doing this to myself. The girl I've been seeing for a bit, the one that Rory met. We went to a show together over the weekend. She was getting pursued by an NBA one of the greats, like, consistently, for a while, multiple occasions with, like, very specific stories. She had proof and all this.

[Rory]

One of the greatest. Hilarious. And I'm not gonna.

[Damaris]

We're not gonna share on the show who it is. Yeah, but it's him.

[Mal]

Okay, so the Bill Walton.

[Rory]

Yes.

[Damaris]

So they met courtside at a game. They were in town playing the Nets, and, you know, got the. The slip from the guy, like one of the team managers, like, hey, one of the players from this team wants to talk to you. Didn't specify who. And then they had her, like, fill out all this shit. She gave it. And then she got a call later that night and said, hey, it's revealed the player, and they're getting a table at Little Sister. If you know, New York, you know, Little Sister. And of course, when he goes out, everyone goes out. So it was. The whole team was there. And he's like, you know, comes out to her, sits, like, on the booth and just like, the small talk, schmoozing. And then at the end of the night, it was like, hey, you want to come up? She said, no. I said, you don't have to lie to me.

[Rory]

She went up.

[Damaris]

I said, you don't have the light. And I was like, that's blank. And then she goes, yeah, but he's not my type. And I was like, but it's blank. Like, come on. Yeah, I would go up.

[Julian]

Do you believe her?

[Damaris]

Actually?

[Mal]

That All Force joke was actually about you.

[Damaris]

I. I believe her because she was. She was very matter of fact. She's like, no, like, he's cool. He's just literally not my. My type. And I was like, okay. Interesting. Glad I am. So then they saw each other again. All Star Weekend last year, Same deal. Tried to get the whole routine, do it again.

[Rory]

It was All Star Week last year.

[Damaris]

Vegas.

[Julian]

So.

[Rory]

So she's at All Star Week.

[Julian]

Thank you.

[Damaris]

So her friend works in the league.

[Rory]

Okay. Yeah. So that's how we.

[Damaris]

And it gets even more close. So then I find out, what does.

[Mal]

Her friend do in the league?

[Damaris]

I don't. I don't. I didn't ask.

[Rory]

She's an influencer.

[Mal]

She's. She's.

[Rory]

She's influenced people watching.

[Damaris]

Strong, independent women.

[Mal]

She's an official.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

She'S a lady ref.

[Rory]

Yeah, she's a Female ref.

[Mal]

Being friends with a lady ref is crazy.

[Julian]

Why do y'all call them lady reps?

[Rory]

Female ref. She's a female referee.

[Julian]

Okay, but why? Why she needs to be a referee?

[Rory]

Because there's only, like, a five female referees in the league.

[Mal]

Basically, a waitress.

[Rory]

Here's the ball. Oh, would you like a timeout? Okay, I got you.

[Damaris]

So I found out on the third time they met that he, the player, does business with one of her very good friends. He's an investor in alcohol some Brandy owns.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Damaris]

So then when he. When that relationship was established that he respects the person that she's close with, it was never about, like, I'm trying to beat. It was all about, yo, how's your family? Like, tell me about, you know, your upbringing. And then he would tell her about his family. It was like, very much like, we're friends now. I see you as a human rather than a whole.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

And I thought that was interesting. So apparently, everything's is sweet. We're all in a good place. But I wanted to ask, should I have beef with this person?

[Rory]

No.

[Julian]

That ain't even your.

[Rory]

Yeah, you can't have beat. Now, see, now, I can't look at.

[Damaris]

This the same now, but now I'm.

[Rory]

Looking at you like, that's what you think beef is. He don't even know about you. How's that?

[Damaris]

He might.

[Mal]

He doesn't.

[Rory]

He doesn't know about you.

[Julian]

You want him to.

[Rory]

You want.

[Damaris]

Janet knows?

[Rory]

Well, J. Cole knows and Janet. I don't know about Janet knowing about you, but J. Cole knows about you.

[Mal]

Think he saw that thug clip and thought, oh, he's probably talking to the girl I wanted to fuck?

[Damaris]

Well, yeah, because mutual follow.

[Mal]

He follows you.

[Damaris]

No, like, she would be the mutual follow. It would be, like, followed by. And then say her name.

[Mal]

So you're thinking that this gentleman is stalking your Instagram based off a YouTube short he saw, maybe was like, oh, definitely got to find this guy's Graham.

[Rory]

No, I could promise you he's not. He has no idea who you are. Now, you saying you believe her, that she didn't go upstairs to his room?

[Mal]

I don't know if I believe her.

[Damaris]

I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt.

[Mal]

That's cute. For now, you guys are in that early phase where, you know, doesn't matter.

[Rory]

All right, so let me ask you something. You believe her now? Say y'all get serious, start dating. Three years down the line, you. One night, she falls asleep, phone in hand, phone open, text messages going off. You open you look at her phone, it's a text from him and it's a. Like you start reading the text naturally.

[Mal]

This girl, it's a hammer pick that she double tapped.

[Rory]

Yeah. Like, do you, do you break up with her?

[Damaris]

So that's the thing. Like if it's not about the person per se, it's the fact that it's the lie. Like, just tell me. You can just tell me. If you did, I wouldn't care. Honestly, I would understand if you did that. Like she was single at the time. Like, it's him. Why not for the story. For the story, I'm not him. But like if there was a woman equivalent. Yes, for the story, I would do that 100%.

[Rory]

Right.

[Damaris]

So no, I would, I wouldn't care if it was him. It was just. I would care that she felt like she lied. To lie. Yeah. Just tell me.

[Rory]

So you break up with her.

[Damaris]

I mean, conversation would need to happen. I don't think it, like hopefully wouldn't get to that point. I don't know.

[Mal]

Well, let me put it in the other scenario. What if she told you that she went upstairs and would you have judged her?

[Damaris]

No, not at all.

[Mal]

But how would you. How. Because you're viewing this gentleman as beef. And, and she didn't fucking. How would you feel if she did?

[Damaris]

Oh, no, the beef, the bees for the joke. The Maris said he's married. I don't give a. These guys do this stuff all the time.

[Mal]

What?

[Damaris]

Like, come on.

[Rory]

Except for Steph Curry, NBA great.

[Damaris]

You think? Yeah, he's licking toes on the off season. Like let them do their thing.

[Mal]

Pump out a kid every other month. Yeah, he doesn't have time to cheat.

[Damaris]

Well, he keeps her in the house.

[Rory]

So you wouldn't adjust if she went upstairs?

[Damaris]

No, not at all.

[Mal]

I would have judged years ago. Why are you telling me this story?

[Damaris]

I forgot how it came.

[Mal]

Because I, I guarantee there's plenty of women that I've dated, talked to, been with, that have had one night stands with NBA players.

[Rory]

Just.

[Mal]

Why are you telling this to me?

[Damaris]

Well, his name's always being mentioned, so I think his name.

[Mal]

Even more reason why you bring this up.

[Julian]

Yeah, I was like, never gonna watch a game the same.

[Mal]

Like, I'm not, I'm not judging a girl that has a one night stand with an NBA player. Like, that is what it is. Everyone's an adult. But like, why are you coming to me to tell me that you fucked an NBA player? If we're, if like we're getting to know each other and date. Like, that's weird to me.

[Rory]

Yeah. I don't need to know that. Like, I'm one of those guys. Like, I don't. I don't need to know that. I don't care about.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's information you could just keep to yourself. Different scenario. If Julian was, like, in the same circle as that guy or working with him or something, then she would probably have the right to be like, yo, just to let you know, so you don't look crazy, you know?

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

There was this one time in Vegas.

[Rory]

Just don't have me looking crazy.

[Julian]

Okay. Hi.

[Mal]

Hey.

[Julian]

I just want to know, what about that situate. What about me telling you about that situation? Because I agree. Right. But what about me telling you that situation will make you look uncrazy? So just because you know now it makes you look uncrazy?

[Rory]

No, it's just I know how to move. Yeah. Like, I don't want to potentially possibly be in a room with this gentleman kicking it, and I'm like, oh, my girl about to come up. I'm about to walk in, whatever. We had a restaurant, wherever. And, like, I'm sitting here kicking it with somebody that blew your back out before. Like, I don't.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I. It wouldn't be.

[Rory]

Let me know. Like, I don't want to end up in.

[Damaris]

Say we ended up club next time they're in town. And, like, we happen to be the same. I wouldn't feel away now because in my mind, at least to my knowledge, nothing happened. But if I did find out that, like, then I'd be like, I don't want to go to the thing.

[Rory]

Yeah, we can't kick it me and home.

[Damaris]

We can't.

[Mal]

I've been in situations where I've been in rooms with people that have slept with the girl I was dating, talking to, whatever. Dating. Let's go. Dating something serious that I was dating and I knew and I was completely fine with it. I've also been in rooms where I didn't know and found out later and felt way shittier about the.

[Damaris]

Yes, exactly.

[Mal]

Like, if I know and I'm like, fine. Everyone has a past. I'm cool in that room. Yeah, I look nuts. I just don't know.

[Rory]

Yeah, like, just. Just let me know. Just so I know where it's at with everybody in here. Like, okay, cool. Like, you didn't know. You don't have a relationship history with none of these guys. All right, cool. Oh, you used to date him. Used to. Around him.

[Julian]

Well, I guess that's What I'm asking, like, okay, so let's. Because we're in the podcast multiverse, let's say. Say your Ian, right? You have a. You guys have a relationship with Ian already. He's cool. Whatever. You find out the girl that you're.

[Rory]

Now in love with.

[Mal]

Who's Ian?

[Damaris]

Oh, the investor.

[Rory]

Oh, okay.

[Mal]

That was, like, the last I was thinking about. I was thinking of NBA players. I was like, what, Ian do we know in the NBA?

[Julian]

I said. Literally said podcast.

[Mal]

I thought you were just saying, for podcast purposes, let's have this conversation.

[Julian]

Oh, no, I'm talking about in the podcast multiverse.

[Mal]

Is there a Nick I don't know about?

[Julian]

That's your world. That's what I'm saying. It's people that you will encounter for work.

[Rory]

My girl. If my girl fudge with Ian.

[Julian]

Your girl fucked Ian. Okay, Right now. You already. Ian came on this podcast. Whatever.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

So you're telling me if your girl fudge Ian before, you wouldn't allow him to come on the podcast?

[Rory]

No, I'm not saying that. I'm saying she's not my girl no more.

[Damaris]

That's true.

[Mal]

Wait, wait, why?

[Julian]

That's what I'm trying to make. Make. Make, like, wait.

[Mal]

But no, like, y'all started dating.

[Rory]

Like, I found out, like, do, like, some podcast.

[Damaris]

Say you've been. Say you were together for, like, two, three months, and Ian's like, no.

[Julian]

Or, like, you guys have been together, like, six months or whatever, and that's a longer time. She comes, she starts to think. She's like, oh, you know, you guys are having a conversation. She's like, oh, yeah. By the way, just so you know, like, I had sex with this podcaster before you might encounter him. So you're telling me that changes your dynamic with your girl and your. Or your dynamic with Ian?

[Rory]

No, no, no. She. As long as she tells me that before, like, you know, I mean, like, I don't want to. Don't. I don't want to find out. Like, when Ian was here and we just start in conversation. I'm like, yeah, I'm about to pick up my girl. Da, da, da. Like, oh, and, you know, oh, her. Like, oh, oh, like, oh, that's your girl. Like, oh, yeah, I know her.

[Damaris]

You still got a location.

[Julian]

Okay, but even if you. Okay, so let's say your girl before. Before you.

[Mal]

He's linking her while he's. That's why he's in town.

[Rory]

Yeah, yeah, they just had dinner. They just had dinner.

[Mal]

Last for a conference. He's gonna look at her. Her portfolio.

[Julian]

No, but, like, so even if she told you that before.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Does that now stop you from saying the enf. Actually was.

[Rory]

Sure.

[Julian]

Doing that now stops you from saying you. I'm going to pick my girl up?

[Rory]

No.

[Mal]

No.

[Julian]

Okay, so you go, you say, I'm going to pick my girl up. And then Ian like, oh, we're like, who your girl? And you say who your girl's name is.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

That's also a weird question.

[Julian]

Still gonna have the same girl as.

[Mal]

Well, who is asking, who's your girl?

[Julian]

Well, you know, whatever. Like. Or she comes up to the office to.

[Mal]

But if.

[Rory]

All right.

[Mal]

But I know that her and Ian have had history and. Sorry, Ian, because I know you're in a relationship and we're putting this on you.

[Julian]

I don't think he's in a relationship.

[Mal]

I take. I'm sorry for putting a relationship on you.

[Rory]

Like, you.

[Julian]

You're doing a lot. Go ahead.

[Mal]

My bad.

[Damaris]

Hypothetical.

[Mal]

It's the. It's the podcast universe. Compari it.

[Rory]

Hypothetical. Hypothetical.

[Mal]

If I know that her and Ian have a history already and she tells me before my Ian interview, she's not going to come up to the studio when Ian is here.

[Damaris]

That's a fact. Yeah.

[Mal]

Like, no way are you going to pull up to the stew. Yeah. You want to say hi to your old friend?

[Damaris]

Nah, stay home.

[Mal]

Like, that's not happening. But I'm not going to cancel the Ian interview.

[Rory]

Yo, the male ego is so fragile.

[Julian]

So it's ridiculous.

[Rory]

It's so fragile. But no, I laugh at it now, like. Cause now, you know when you young, you don't understand. Like, when you see young dudes that, like, have a girlfriend and you see, they get upset and they start acting, it's like, what's up? It's really. He just don't know how to address the fact that his ego is so fragile.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's adults.

[Rory]

But the older you get. But I'm saying the older you get, it just.

[Julian]

You become more self aware of it.

[Rory]

And you can laugh at it. Like, you can laugh at how fragile the ego is because it's kind of like, all right, so your girl slept with somebody that you know before y'all even met and got together. Like, that's not a big deal. It doesn't fucking matter now. The way in which you find out, I think is what matters, because that will help, not bruise or, like, hurt my ego in a sense. Because I don't want to find out. I'm sitting here kicking it with somebody like, that. Oh, shit. Like, used to fuck with my girl. Like, yeah, I don't want to find out like that. Because then it's kind of like, damn, like, now the whole just. I could have came in here with a different angle. Like, I could have came in here. You know what I'm saying? Like, but I don't think.

[Mal]

I don't think it's just a little.

[Rory]

Different knowing I'm walking into a. Walking into an interview knowing that, okay, I'm about to sit down and talk to somebody that.

[Mal]

You wait.

[Rory]

If I had a relationship with my.

[Julian]

Girlfriend before, what would change about the interview?

[Rory]

Because now I could just. I gotta get my off Eskimo bros and like, yeah, nah, but now I gotta get my off faster. Now I gotta let this know. Like, yo, all right, hold on. My. Like. Cause I understand. You know, you and my. You and my girl got a little history.

[Julian]

But you can always see when niggas do that and it comes off corny.

[Rory]

That's okay. We're gonna just be some cobs in this tonight. I don't give a. Let me know that you this before I sit down and have an interview. Yeah, just let me know. I don't care how corny it comes. Let me know so I'm not walking in here because it's. It's worse if he knows, like, and he knows that I don't know.

[Damaris]

You want it to be equal playing.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's embarrassing. Question of what makes you look crazy.

[Rory]

Yeah, makes you look crazy. Like, if he knows that he had sex with my girlfriend and he knows that I don't know that. Yo, come on, man. Like, that's. You can't have me out here like that. I might as well be walking around with a thong on like, that's true.

[Mal]

I might as well making fucking Kai videos.

[Rory]

Yeah. Like, what the fuck? At that point. Like, are you kidding me? You gotta tell me. And that's the only reason I wanna know. Just so in moving in different rooms, you never know who you end up in the room with.

[Damaris]

That's true.

[Rory]

Okay, like, cool. I just not. I'm not gonna treat the person any differently. I'm not gonna treat my girl any differently. Like. But it's a problem if I find out a certain way and then I know that the dude knows that me and you together, but he knows that. I don't know.

[Mal]

We have fragile egos, but I don't think that's part of it. Like, not wanting her to come up while we do the interview, to me isn't A fragile ego. It's just. What do the women say? Protect my peace. Yeah, I just want to protect my peace. Even if I have.

[Julian]

How would that take away your peace, though, outside of your ego?

[Mal]

If I can. All right. If I can avoid a situation where I have. Where I have to have my girl and one of her past partners who I have a working relationship with, all in the same room. If I can avoid that, I'm going to avoid it.

[Julian]

But that has to do with your ego. It's not like they're going to start making eyes at each other. It's literally your ego.

[Mal]

So I should just invite it for. No. She doesn't come up with studio anyways. But when her ex is here, I should invite her. Like, to me, that girl is. That's not a studio. This is the multiverse.

[Rory]

Multiverse.

[Mal]

Multiverse.

[Damaris]

Multiverse.

[Julian]

Your partner is going to come up.

[Mal]

We can. We can use me in my personal life, my current relationship. I know somebody that she dated years before we ever met. I'm associates with that person. She told me when we first started talking. It's been completely fine. That doesn't mean that I'm gonna go to his job with her and ask for a fucking glass of wine. That's not. It's not an ego thing. It's just like, why would I.

[Rory]

So he's a bartender.

[Mal]

Fucking loser.

[Damaris]

You know, it's tough for Rory if he's saying no to a glass of wine. Yeah.

[Rory]

You know, he ain't turning around.

[Mal]

Loser.

[Rory]

He do offer Rory some wine. Where, like, I don't Dr. Yeah, that's a lot. That's a lie.

[Mal]

How? You know, she liked that year of soft.

[Julian]

Not that year.

[Mal]

But if I can avoid that, doesn't make my ego fragile. I actually. It didn't bother me at all. I thought it was really cool and mature of her to tell me, like, hey, I know you know this person, and we're getting a little serious. We dated years and years ago. I thought that was cool. That does not mean I'm gonna be like, hey, do you want to go to his restaurant together today?

[Rory]

Yeah. It's like me doing that.

[Mal]

That's not a fragile ego. It's just like, why put yourself in that position?

[Julian]

You going out of your way to do something that you usually don't do.

[Mal]

And I'm saying if I could, not.

[Julian]

Coming to the studio would be her going out of her way not to do something that she regularly does just because somebody is there that she used to sleep with. I understand.

[Mal]

Just stay home that day, Yes, I.

[Julian]

Understand why you wouldn't want it. My point in that was you saying that that has nothing to do with ego when it actually does us. Because it's not. It's not dangerous. It's not a. It's only awkward for you because of your ego.

[Mal]

So not wanting to be in certain situations is all ego based.

[Julian]

That situation, that particular situation. That particular situation is off you.

[Rory]

But if that.

[Julian]

It will bother you because of your ego.

[Damaris]

I was gonna say it's just peaceful, but if Rory's doing this, say, the Back to the Ian Multiverse scenario, if he's.

[Mal]

Poor Ian, man.

[Damaris]

If Ian's coming, all our girls, and you're here to actually get work done, why wouldn't you want the environment to be, like, all about the work? Why would you want.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Girl in the room to then make. Even if she doesn't say anything and everything's cool, it's still. There's, like this energy. Just avoid it. Do the work.

[Mal]

Like she's never. She's never watched any other interview.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

All right.

[Rory]

The marriage. Let's reverse it. Let's. Hold on, let's reverse it. Let's reverse it.

[Mal]

That thing down, flipping and reversing.

[Rory]

Hold on, hold on now. Hold on. Let me. Let me put this thing together. So your boyfriend is a podcaster, and he's sitting down. He's interviewing his ex girl, Danny, from the Stop. His ex girl is a recording artist. Her album's coming out, right?

[Julian]

Okay.

[Rory]

She's on her run.

[Julian]

So my man's a podcaster. He's interviewing an artist that he date.

[Mal]

That he used to date Coi Leray.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Okay.

[Rory]

Right. You know that she's coming to the studio today. Do you go to the studio that day?

[Julian]

That's not reversed.

[Rory]

No, I'm asking you, but I'm just saying, do you go to the studio that day?

[Julian]

Do I go to the studio? Do I regularly go to the studio? If I regularly go to the studio, I go to the studio.

[Rory]

I mean, you pop in every now and then. You'll go, like. You'll go by the studio. Not like every. You don't go to every fucking recording. But, you know, you pop in every now and then. But this day, his ex girlfriend, who's a recording artist, is coming to his show and he's interviewing her.

[Julian]

Do I go? Yeah, I'll go.

[Rory]

But why?

[Damaris]

Ego.

[Julian]

No, not ego.

[Rory]

Why?

[Damaris]

Curiosity.

[Julian]

I don't know. Because I'm nosy.

[Rory]

Nosy.

[Damaris]

Curiosity.

[Julian]

I'm nosy. Like.

[Rory]

Yeah, what? Nosy.

[Mal]

Trying to Smell some for that ego.

[Julian]

No, that's not. Yeah, I don't think that that's ego, though.

[Rory]

All right, better question.

[Mal]

So how is mine not ego?

[Rory]

You asking the wrong questions, my man. I better question. You usually go to the studio. You usually go to the studio very casual, no makeup, sweats.

[Julian]

Oh, come on now.

[Rory]

You know, hoodie.

[Julian]

Come on now.

[Rory]

No merch. Hoodie. You know, chilling. How do you go to the studio dressed that day?

[Julian]

I had the merch hoodie on. But the face gonna be beat. Hair gonna be laid.

[Mal]

Why?

[Julian]

Ego.

[Damaris]

Ego.

[Rory]

Fuck.

[Julian]

Bitch ain't about to say, oh, that's you. You ain't the only bad bitch in the world, baby. Bugged out, yo.

[Mal]

So if you say you allow him to have a good interview. No, because obviously, no. They probably had chemistry at some point.

[Julian]

I didn't. I didn't hear what he was saying. I was saying no to something else. Yes, I allow him to have a good.

[Mal]

What if they did? What if they start kikiing a little too much and start reminiscing like, oh, my God, remember 2011?

[Julian]

I'll rather die.

[Rory]

Like, yo, remember 2011? She'd be like, yo, I couldn't walk straight for two days after that night.

[Julian]

First of all, she's not doing that.

[Mal]

You don't know how. Coy, give it up.

[Julian]

If you. Okay, don't put that on point, J.

[Mal]

But if you do, we're in the podverse.

[Julian]

No, this is the thing, though. Shorty does that. You're doing that to test if I'm or not. That's what I. That's how I n. We getting a good interview.

[Rory]

We know each other personally. We have a history. So this interview is completely different. This is completely different from your Breakfast Club.

[Julian]

If they talked about that in pre production, then, hey, yeah, we going be making it personal.

[Rory]

We. We have. We have a. We have a relationship.

[Julian]

Pull that out. And he looks stuck. Like, that wasn't supposed to happen. And it's like, oh, you think I'm okay?

[Mal]

What if she doesn't know about you?

[Rory]

Because she ain't supposed to.

[Damaris]

And she looks.

[Mal]

You were saying it was crazy like that. We need to know if our girl slept with a dude. Why do we need to know that?

[Julian]

That was crazy.

[Mal]

How would you feel walking into that.

[Rory]

Interview and you didn't know that your boyfriend used to. With Coy?

[Damaris]

And Coy looks at you. He's like, sweetie, can I get a water?

[Mal]

Yes. And looks at you like. Like you just work here.

[Julian]

Oh, I guess my whole body got hot.

[Rory]

Yo, but that's gonna water.

[Julian]

So that ego body got hot.

[Rory]

That ego was trying to get out like you said. Ego. That ego is trying to jump about her chest just now. You saw that? Yeah. That hurt, right?

[Julian]

No. You could get the out my face before it get bad out here. What the is you talking about?

[Damaris]

Damn.

[Julian]

Like you. But a water don't suck.

[Rory]

What are you standing closest to the cool.

[Damaris]

Don't summon me.

[Rory]

What if you. What you. What if you're the closest one to the fridge?

[Julian]

I tip that whole over. We'll all be parched in this.

[Mal]

What if she, like, didn't even order water and something really obscure like a cream Shasta soda and made you go out and get.

[Damaris]

But what if her guy ordered it and he knew that was her drink? Like, your man was like, I know what she wants. And it's like this obscure latte.

[Rory]

Oh, yeah. What if your man from the couch that he's interviewing all yours. Babe, can you grab a water? Two waters.

[Mal]

And then. And then she says, oh, I didn't know you were in a relationship.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Nope. No, man. No man that will ever be with me. Will ever even allow. Go grab a.

[Mal]

What?

[Rory]

Can you grab me, too?

[Julian]

No, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go grab two waters, and on my way out, I'm gonna grab another nigga too.

[Mal]

Okay.

[Rory]

I'm grabbing a. On the way out.

[Mal]

But if you were at these other interviews.

[Rory]

Yeah. Is just in the hallway, you're like, man, that's crazy.

[Mal]

I mean, if you do walk outside.

[Rory]

Oh, yeah, women could get a boyfriend. Okay.

[Mal]

If you had been to other interviews when it wasn't his exes, I'm sure if he said, babe, do you mind grabbing us two waters? You would do it, right?

[Damaris]

Yes.

[Mal]

Okay.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

But don't play in my face. I didn't say I didn't have an ego.

[Rory]

No, listen, we all have huge one. We all have one. I'm just pointing out. The point of that whole conversation was just pointing out that. That men and women both have fragile egos. That's all.

[Damaris]

Yeah, we do.

[Mal]

And I'm lying about my maturity. I would never interview Ian if I knew he my girl.

[Julian]

Exactly. Exactly. I'm like, come on, now.

[Damaris]

We ain't doing that.

[Mal]

I'm not saying it would. Like there'd be an issue. I'm just. I'm cool.

[Julian]

So you. So if Ian was already out here.

[Mal]

Like, the interview with he.

[Rory]

I don't care about the stock market this week.

[Mal]

The Dow is in the trash right now.

[Rory]

I don't even care them NFTs in them stocks.

[Julian]

You telling me if the interview was already booked and you tell your girl, yo, I got an interview. Oh, we have an interview today with so and so. And she's like, oh, him. I him.

[Rory]

This would be the only him, I him.

[Damaris]

That's a sick way.

[Mal]

If she would have said, I him, that's fine. But saying, oh, him would have pissed me off even more.

[Rory]

Yeah, like, don't tell me, oh, him.

[Julian]

So you're going to call fudgeing me and Julian and say, yeah, contact that nigga?

[Rory]

That shit hurt. When it's a nigga that just, like, slept with your girl and didn't take her serious. Yeah, that hurt. That's like, damn. Like, he ain't even want you. Like, you know what?

[Mal]

I think? I think that's probably.

[Rory]

Yeah, I am stressed out here. I am stressed out.

[Damaris]

Choking me.

[Rory]

And this didn't even. And this didn't want you. And then it gets it. And then again and then it gets to the point where you like, should I look better than this, though? Like, and he ain't want you. But that's.

[Julian]

But see, that's not fair, though, because.

[Mal]

The majority of the time you're comparing yourself amongst another man to see if you'd like your girl enough.

[Damaris]

I'm good about myself.

[Rory]

That's not gay.

[Damaris]

I'm looking at a legend.

[Rory]

I'm looking at a dude that I'm like, I look better than this dude. Like, it just says is.

[Julian]

But that's. There's so much because you do that.

[Mal]

Means you shouldn't take her seriously.

[Rory]

No, I'm just saying, like, yo, he didn't take you serious. And yeah, I am stressing.

[Mal]

He might have been battling demons because.

[Julian]

No, not even that. You just. She might not have been the person for him. Like, there's girls that you serious and vice versa.

[Rory]

But also, that look is uglier than you be like, yo, nah. You know, just wasn't the right to your girl. Like, nah, I just hit it.

[Mal]

Now that I think about it, I'm probably cool with this. Well, not the scenario. The truth of what I just gave you about my girls, not their last relationship before me that I knew the guy. Yeah, I probably would have felt away if he just, like, beat.

[Rory]

That's what I'm saying.

[Mal]

I think. I think I'm okay with it because they actually.

[Rory]

You have to feel away when a dude just, like, had sex with your girl and just, like, curved it.

[Julian]

Oh, well, that's a rough. Yeah, that's Yeah, I get what you're like.

[Mal]

You probably have the nerve to say some, like, well, CB Wasn't that serious. Like, yes, the problem.

[Rory]

That's crazy. Like a dude just curving.

[Mal]

Every girl, for the most part, every.

[Damaris]

Girl'S been in that situation.

[Rory]

Yeah, but how many times do you meet.

[Mal]

How many times have you done that to a girl? Curvy girl, did not take her seriously. Be in skeet and skedaddle.

[Rory]

That was a way of life for me. Like, not too long.

[Julian]

Exactly.

[Mal]

But that you've created years of insecurity amongst a thousand women.

[Rory]

Yeah, I know I shouldn't have did that.

[Mal]

Someone wifed her, that karma is going to come out.

[Damaris]

That's why I feel bad about my situation, because she said no. At least that's what I was told.

[Rory]

A lot of them.

[Damaris]

I feel great about it.

[Rory]

She definitely went upstairs.

[Mal]

No, she did it. Which is.

[Rory]

She went to the club. She went to All Star. She went to All Star weekend.

[Julian]

Leg up.

[Rory]

She went to the club. All Star weekend. You think she didn't go to the room?

[Damaris]

No, no.

[Rory]

She got. She was. She was. She went to that room before he did.

[Julian]

But you know what? I'm not gonna put that. I'm not gonna put her idea. I'm not gonna put that on her jacket because there are women who won't like. I would never. That gentleman, if he approached me, I would never. I would never do that.

[Rory]

I'm not jacking that.

[Damaris]

That.

[Rory]

I'm not jacking.

[Julian]

I don't understand why y'all think because y'all be looking up to these men that all the women.

[Rory]

I don't look up to that.

[Mal]

He actually shits on him pretty often.

[Rory]

I don't look up to that. I just see you used to. With. You wouldn't believe it.

[Damaris]

Just believe it.

[Rory]

Just believe it. My bad.

[Mal]

Why did you say Jerry West's name?

[Rory]

My bad. You see how fast. You see how fast I'll be forgetting?

[Julian]

Yeah, yeah.

[Rory]

Nah, because it's just like, yo, you get to the point where it's like, yo, just stop. Cause understand, understand. Like, I understand without that.

[Julian]

You seen niggas? I used to. What the does that mean?

[Rory]

Not. Not real. Not realistically. But, like, you never with a. That's on that level.

[Damaris]

That's what I'm saying.

[Julian]

But what you don't understand, I don't always. It doesn't always matter to every female. I know this is hard because you grew up around with money. So you were. You were raised around groupies. Some women have other.

[Damaris]

You're Race around.

[Julian]

He was. Some women value more than just money and status. The money and status are not gonna make a fuck. I don't understand why you don't see that. There's plenty of women who aren't like that.

[Rory]

For sure. For sure. I'm with you on that. But you can't say that in one sentence. And then in a conversation a few days ago be mad because you went out with a. That you found out is something and that he was broke. The balance.

[Julian]

What does that have to. You can.

[Rory]

That nigga is far from broken.

[Julian]

Okay, but broke isn't the only, like, that's not the only deterrent. Money is just something you need to have. Kind of like your side.

[Rory]

Okay, but let's.

[Julian]

Let's be. That's not the only thing though. That man is not attractive to me. That man is married.

[Rory]

Okay?

[Julian]

That man is not my type.

[Rory]

Will you agree that you slept with some guys before that today you aren't attracted to?

[Julian]

Okay. Yeah.

[Rory]

All right. So at some point or another, you're not attracted to people. That attraction changes, right?

[Julian]

Yeah, but at the time I slept with them, I was attracted to them.

[Rory]

Okay. Physically. Physically. He may not be the most handsome guy to you. Right. He's in shape.

[Julian]

He's also. He's married.

[Rory]

He's a cool. All of that. Great.

[Julian]

And he's looking for a one night stand in a hotel room.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

He's on the road.

[Julian]

He's looking for a group. He's looking for a groupie. I'm not a group.

[Rory]

He's looking for a night of memories.

[Julian]

Okay.

[Rory]

You've had nights to collide with him.

[Julian]

What you're telling me is that the only attractive thing about this man to me would be his money and his success.

[Rory]

That's. That's all that it takes some time.

[Julian]

Okay. But I'm telling you that most times with women, real, real, real women that don't do for me. I'm not Money and success. That's that he's not gonna do anything.

[Damaris]

That's why I like her so much.

[Julian]

That does nothing for me. Oh, I. Somebody who has money.

[Rory]

Oh.

[Julian]

I. Money is not sexually transmitted.

[Rory]

No.

[Mal]

Success it is if you trap them.

[Rory]

Success.

[Julian]

Exactly. Success is not sexually transmitted.

[Mal]

Or blackmail.

[Julian]

I don't smear him and suddenly become successful. I him leave the.

[Rory]

Yes, you can. You don't see. You don't see the blueprint for what 90% of these girls are doing now.

[Mal]

You know how many Vlad interviews you could do if you fucked him?

[Rory]

You don't. You have. You're not looking at you not looking at this.

[Mal]

Down the road, you would be on Club Station.

[Julian]

I'm compromising myself, my fucking privacy and all of that. For what?

[Rory]

For what? For just a night of fun.

[Julian]

It's mad niggas I could go have fun with without all the extra.

[Rory]

Not that nigga, though.

[Julian]

But see, that's. I just.

[Rory]

That nigga is the apex. That nigga is on the top of the food chain.

[Julian]

Something to me. I'm just saying, like, I don't.

[Rory]

All right to you. Cool. Take you out of it. But can you. Can you agree that. Can you agree that to 80% of women out there that mean something?

[Julian]

I wouldn't even do 80%. I would.

[Rory]

What do you see online every day talking about all, yo, I really just need 500,000 in a hug that can make it happen.

[Mal]

And a hug at the club. Definitely be his bank will actually transfer it from his cash app. He's the only person on earth with cash app that could do half a million wiring.

[Damaris]

Cash app. A half a mil.

[Mal]

Just the only bank account that can do it.

[Julian]

Everybody.

[Rory]

That wouldn't hurt that gentleman is all I'm saying.

[Julian]

Not everybody. He wasn't gonna pay that girl $5,000. Not everything sale is the only thing I'm saying. There's nothing wrong with the people who's. Who's is for sale. That's what's up. But not everybody's is for sale.

[Rory]

Everybody's for sale is just different currencies.

[Mal]

Everybody periods for sale.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Oh, yeah. Everybody has a price.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Well, would you.

[Mal]

Would you interview him if you. He knew he beat.

[Damaris]

Why would I, you know, whoever I'm not interviewing. I'm not an interviewer.

[Mal]

I mean.

[Rory]

Oh, would we jump.

[Damaris]

I'm on to talk honestly. Yeah, but it would be more because.

[Julian]

You'D be in the corner. Would you get him a coffee?

[Mal]

Would you invite her to this?

[Damaris]

No.

[Julian]

Would you get him a coffee?

[Damaris]

Why would I invite her? She's never been here.

[Mal]

Apparently I have a fragile ego because I didn't want to invite Ian up here after he.

[Damaris]

My girl on your side. I'm not inviting my girl. Like, yo, we have the guy that's trying to smash. Actually, it would probably be more awkward for him because he didn't be. Yeah, allegedly.

[Rory]

He wanted to, though.

[Damaris]

He wanted multiple times.

[Rory]

See, it's. That came up. But that's still a thing when a wanted to have sex with your girl.

[Julian]

Hey, I give up on my man.

[Mal]

Explain that a dude wanting to your girl.

[Rory]

He shot it at her like, he shot it and missed and missed. Yeah, but that's still a thing. Like, yo, this wanted to fuck my girl. It's still a thing.

[Mal]

So I just. You should date extremely unattractive women.

[Rory]

It is, though.

[Julian]

One you had. I wanted to her. That don't mean nothing.

[Rory]

A. I had. Yeah. Where had this? At home in a multiverse.

[Damaris]

Which was.

[Julian]

Yeah, one of our multiverses.

[Mal]

We don't even use the word.

[Rory]

Yeah. I'm just trying to figure.

[Julian]

We were at a show.

[Mal]

Oh, she was a family friend.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Damaris]

But I feel better about myself.

[Julian]

I'm sure Julian wanted to her too.

[Mal]

Like, wait, so it's a thing if dudes want to your girl, which is.

[Rory]

Like, shot at it, so. Not that you have a attractive girl and shoot her.

[Julian]

Shoot.

[Rory]

I'm talking about, like, the nigga, they had, like, conversations before, and he shot it at her like, yo, like, you want to come to the room?

[Julian]

And she denied it. That's. I feel like that's fire.

[Damaris]

I don't feel away.

[Mal]

That's fire.

[Rory]

But I still look at this nigga. If we in the same room like bitch ass niggas.

[Damaris]

Well, I can't do that to him.

[Mal]

Wait, are y'all together?

[Rory]

Me and the girl? Yeah.

[Mal]

Oh, yeah. You could feel away. I thought you just meant in the history of time.

[Rory]

She was shot at. Shooting at my girl. While I'm with her, I'm really shooting.

[Mal]

You talking about different scenario. I'm with you then. Yeah, I'm with you. I thought you were saying in the past that a guy just shot at her and got to know.

[Rory]

Offended. Like, she like, yo, why you ain't just coming up to me like, yo, shorty was good. I'm sitting right here. In what world is that happening? Like, are you crazy? Okay, that's not happening.

[Mal]

What are you doing to the gentleman that we're talking about if he does that in your face?

[Damaris]

The one that I'm.

[Mal]

Because I'm. Because I'm losing that fight.

[Damaris]

I'm not doing anything.

[Mal]

I say I'd pop off, but I don't know if I'd pop off.

[Rory]

Y'all was together and try to.

[Damaris]

I would, like, I would probably. Probably gestured to her like, oh, like she's with me kind of thing. Like. Like a loving embrace.

[Rory]

What am I gonna do? I'm gonna square up with him.

[Damaris]

He's got like a foot and a half on you.

[Mal]

Just gotta take the ass route and be like, do you want me to call your wife, sir?

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mal]

What would your wife Think about this.

[Damaris]

For real.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

You gotta snitch at that point.

[Mal]

No, you can't do that.

[Rory]

I'll pop on that.

[Mal]

I don't give a. I really thought you were suggesting it would feel away.

[Julian]

Now you get washed in front of your girl.

[Rory]

All I'm gonna get. Gonna get that one crack. Take whatever's on the table. Crack that over.

[Damaris]

All right.

[Rory]

That's all. Of course he's a. He's a tank. Of course. Like, I understand that. But I'mma crack that skull. Believe that. It's a plate. It's something on this table where it's going upside.

[Julian]

He gonna eat that.

[Rory]

That's okay. I got mine off though.

[Mal]

I think my hardest sucker punch. I don't think would. You know.

[Julian]

No.

[Rory]

You'll be surprised, bro.

[Damaris]

You need an object. You got a surprise candle with an object.

[Mal]

I think I'd be able to do it.

[Rory]

That video. That spiral every four months when Think that's me in Walmart. Who Big that is you though. It's not me. But thought that dude is an ex football player.

[Damaris]

True.

[Rory]

So thought that he was gonna put that other dude down. Gonna wash you.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Not the case. He washed and rinsed and set that.

[Mal]

How drunk is he? A little sister.

[Rory]

I don't care.

[Mal]

That would help. How wet is the floor?

[Damaris]

They were drinking quite a bit from what I was told. Yeah.

[Rory]

And I don't drink. So I got the upper hand.

[Damaris]

You would be stone cold sober in there.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Somebody said it's something real feminine about men being outside drunk. They all lose.

[Mal]

Loose.

[Julian]

I'm like.

[Damaris]

I saw that.

[Julian]

Where Loose. Maybe loose and unaware when they drink. And that should be cracked.

[Mal]

Gyrating our hips at the club.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Don't be that vulnerable when you with me, bro.

[Julian]

Don't be my man and be like stumbling. And we are. We're a walking ticket. Like. Nah, I don't do that.

[Rory]

Yo. Being drunk but you can't walk and your girl gotta carry.

[Mal]

That's.

[Damaris]

That's sick. That's bad.

[Rory]

You might as well get out. You might as well just walk into another house.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Yeah. Like, she. It's like, she ain't. She don't look at you the same no more like, is this how you.

[Mal]

Like Bird trying to drag you out of Uber?

[Julian]

I definitely did. Went on a date with someone. We ended up in a relationship. But early on in our date in life, he wasn't a drinker. He was a smoker. And I like, kind of got him drunk.

[Damaris]

Kind of.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

I got. I got him up and Like, I had to. Like, he was like throwing up. He was up. He never did that again.

[Rory]

He took advantage of him.

[Julian]

Nine. I wasn't drunk. Men are not attractive. Like drunk women are not attractive.

[Damaris]

No. God, not at all.

[Rory]

Yeah, nothing worse than that is so annoying.

[Mal]

How embarrassing would it be if your man got too drunk on his birthday? Like, I just feel like that's some women to me.

[Julian]

No, I feel like that's. I feel like the birthday is okay.

[Damaris]

That is.

[Mal]

Your man just starts throwing up at the club on his birthday.

[Rory]

You may get drunk on his birthday. He had his birthday party. He start pouring drinks on himself and like. Yeah, that type of drunk shirt all soaked.

[Julian]

Why would he pour drinks on himself?

[Damaris]

He's missing your mouth and just.

[Rory]

No, no, no. I'm talking actual drink in like celebration and celebration style. Like porn champagne.

[Julian]

Like he. Like he's a at an NBA final.

[Damaris]

Like that Chris Bosh video.

[Mal]

Yeah, well, he want to change.

[Julian]

God, yeah.

[Mal]

No, I just feel like a man getting too drunk on holidays is feminine. Like if a guy gets too drunk on New Year's Eve, that's very feminine to me.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

If he gets too drunk on his birthday, that's feminine to me. Go get super drunk on a regular Tuesday and maybe I can respect you.

[Damaris]

That's what we do on tour, like Christmas time.

[Rory]

If you get drunk off of Kokito at the crib. Looking at you as a man. I'm looking at you like, Coquito is crazy.

[Julian]

Your stomach is up.

[Rory]

Your son, what you going.

[Mal]

Going tighten up like together.

[Rory]

How you drink a bottle and a half a bunch of white to yourself though, like, what you going through? Who gets drunk on Coquito?

[Julian]

A lot of people actually drunk.

[Mal]

You can have the runs. I don't know about drunk though.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

O drunk on Coquito is crazy.

[Julian]

I feel like your would collapse before you even got a chance to get drunk drinking that much.

[Mal]

Coquito being super up and having the runs is hilarious.

[Julian]

Been there.

[Mal]

You can't even sit up straight on the toilet.

[Rory]

That's what Hennessy dude get a prolapsed.

[Damaris]

From Coquito Hennessy make you?

[Rory]

Hennessy is a dia already.

[Mal]

Yeah, and he's not the push.

[Rory]

Sure.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Hennessy for sure.

[Damaris]

Well, so when I hit the group chat to tell everybody about this story, my friends were like laughing, I guess. A close friend of mine went on a date with a girl last yesterday and she was telling him that at the same club that Vin Diesel came up to her and tried to holler at her and Pick her up and same situation. She was hanging out at the table, whatever, talking to small talk. And then she was like, I'm not interested at all. She was just like, there out of, like, respect or friends or there. Whatever. And at the end of the night, he proposed. Like, come up with me. She was like, no. So instead of saying bye, he leaned in and licked her face.

[Rory]

It's like a salt homie licked her face.

[Damaris]

Vin Diesel licked this girl's face. And Vin Diesel's like. Well, in his, like, mid-50s.

[Julian]

I know. His breath was hot. At little sister.

[Damaris]

I think she's. She's 30 years younger than him.

[Rory]

Licked your girl's face?

[Damaris]

No, a different girl. The guy that my friend was on a date. The girl that my friend was on a date with.

[Rory]

With.

[Mal]

That's a lot.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Wait, the girl that. Okay, but he wasn't at the club when.

[Damaris]

No, no, she was just. She was just recounting old.

[Rory]

I ain't going to lie, cuz. Vin would look at your girl face while you with her. You might have to hit that with a line for Fast and Furious. Family sticks together.

[Mal]

You got to call Tyrese and join up on his side.

[Rory]

Yo, yo, Vin D Will lick your girl face while you. That's. Hey, I'll kill one of these, though. Real talk. Like, now that I'm really thinking about it, like, I'm cool. I'm cool with shooting a. That lick girl in the face while I'm with her. Yeah, I think the homies is going to appreciate that when I'm locked up. Like. Yeah, that was real shooting.

[Mal]

Vin Diesel.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Yeah, you probably do.

[Rory]

I'm popping.

[Julian]

Wait, hold on. Did they finish all 10 fast and furious movies yet?

[Rory]

I don't give a how many, because.

[Julian]

If we at seven and you stop me from getting eight, I don't know if you watch them.

[Rory]

Yeah. Who's watching Fast and Furious?

[Julian]

One of the most. It's like one of the most famous.

[Damaris]

Success in quality or two different things.

[Julian]

Okay, it doesn't matter. He said who's watching it? A lot of people.

[Rory]

Yeah, but Fast and Furious is like his ass. Yeah, it's like it's over for that.

[Mal]

And the rocker at the club together and lick your girl's face.

[Damaris]

Oh, hell no. She's gone.

[Rory]

The rock. Yeah, she. That.

[Damaris]

She's clipped.

[Rory]

Yeah, it's over.

[Mal]

And you know, he's sober, too.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Look at a girl's face. Sober is crazy, Rock.

[Rory]

The Rock look like if you shoot him, he'll pull a bullet out himself for sure.

[Julian]

Like the Hulk.

[Rory]

Yeah, like, he'll pull that out and drop that right on the floor.

[Julian]

Drop it in your drink.

[Rory]

He like, you left something. Drop that on your table. Table.

[Mal]

Probably put it back in his own. Yeah, shoot you.

[Rory]

Yeah, the Rock. The Rock. Look, your girl face. You gotta just, like, you know, I mean, it's over.

[Mal]

I would have to. My ego would have to get bruised that day.

[Rory]

You fighting a Rock?

[Mal]

No.

[Damaris]

Hell no.

[Rory]

I. I'm going outside.

[Mal]

I would look at my girl and say, yo, your face just got licked. Here, here's a napkin.

[Julian]

Here.

[Mal]

You want some Purell? Like, I don't know what to tell you.

[Damaris]

Well, you.

[Mal]

You gotta take this L. Together.

[Rory]

I don't have a baby wife in the car.

[Mal]

We could just leave.

[Rory]

What if it happen?

[Mal]

If you're uncomfortable, we could just leave.

[Rory]

Roy.

[Damaris]

What if it happens?

[Rory]

Yo, the Rock. Look, your girlfriend, you turn to tell her, yo, we can just.

[Damaris]

Cuz, obviously you can leave.

[Rory]

Just. Yo, we can leave it.

[Mal]

I got a makeup wipe.

[Rory]

Yo, we can just. The Rock lick your girl face. He turned into it. Like, listen, if it made you uncomfortable.

[Damaris]

We could just leave if it made you uncomfortable.

[Mal]

And then if he was over there, I'd be like, yo, we should use this exit. Let's go this way, yo.

[Rory]

Yeah. Cause you're not fighting the Rock. Ain't nobody fighting the Rock, bro.

[Damaris]

I don't think anybody's fighting the. The guy that I was talking about earlier, either.

[Rory]

Nigga's a pop on that. I think some.

[Mal]

Some people would.

[Rory]

I know a few that are pop clean on that. You got. You got a few twisted. He ain't no fighter. Great athlete, but he ain't no fighter. The Rock. You not fighting the Rock, dog. Your man. Yo, we at the club, and the Rock. Look, your girl face. And you come off and find me on the other side of the club like, yo, we got static. I'm like, what happened? Yo, the Rock just licked my girl face. I'm going be like, yo, I think we need to, because we not going over there doing nothing to the Rock.

[Mal]

It's either we talk it out with him or we go to the parking lot.

[Rory]

Yeah, we. We leaving, bro. We leaving. The Rock is one of them. You bumping in it. Feel like he's, like, submitted it to the ground. He's that type of straw. You're not fighting the Rock, bro. The. The Rock. No.

[Julian]

I know some men who would try.

[Rory]

Honestly, you know that are stupid, too.

[Julian]

I know.

[Rory]

I know any trying to fight the Rock. Come on, bro. Bro, like, I Would we grew up watching him.

[Mal]

I would love to know their strategy. Like, next time you see them, ask them how they would go about fighting the Rock. What would be their first move?

[Damaris]

Grab an object.

[Rory]

You what object would be a gun.

[Damaris]

Yeah, like a metal pipe or a gun.

[Rory]

That's not something where you can maintain distance.

[Mal]

An assault rifle would be the only thing I could maybe.

[Damaris]

Yeah, a gun. You need to maintain distance.

[Rory]

I don't care if you saw he's eating.

[Mal]

Just a regular hand.

[Rory]

A baseball bat right there. You're not picking up a bat and squaring up with the Rock.

[Julian]

No, he's snatching that out your hand you gonna be hanging.

[Rory]

You gonna get one swing. You gonna hit that one time. He gonna grab that and then what now got to go to plan B.

[Mal]

You know those little like the Nerf bats that when you hit, like, it almost breaks. Aluminum bat would do that.

[Rory]

Yeah. You're not doing. It's just certain dudes that are just. They. They just lifting too much, man. You're not fighting them.

[Mal]

All right, so leave if the Rock your girl. Are you doing the interview?

[Rory]

Yeah, hell yeah.

[Mal]

Yeah, I probably would do it too.

[Rory]

The Rock. Hell yeah.

[Damaris]

Yeah. There's certain people like, yo, so I.

[Rory]

Hear we got similar taste, so you got to lead the interview.

[Julian]

That's. Please don't leave it like that.

[Mal]

But then I Then I'd say, because he probably wouldn't fit in this chair, so we'd probably have to bring the couch over here. It would probably just be you and I seat on the Rock in a full couch. Yeah, I would probably start feeling a little insecure looking at the Rock in person. Like, he definitely her way better than I ever.

[Julian]

Oh, he was mad.

[Mal]

He was going crazy.

[Rory]

Yeah, I might have to shoot that.

[Damaris]

Name's the Rock.

[Rory]

Yeah, you got to shoot that pop that man there. Certain that you, like, come on, you too strong. My can't fight you. I gotta shoot you.

[Mal]

And I wouldn't even like, know what a follow up if my girl was like, I'll just let you know before you do this interview. Like, you know, I him Dwayne.

[Damaris]

Dwayne.

[Rory]

She calling him Dwayne is like, that's wild. Calling the Rock Dwayne.

[Damaris]

I think the people that are close.

[Mal]

What would I say?

[Damaris]

Like, people that are close.

[Mal]

Why'd you guys break up?

[Damaris]

I'm a dj.

[Rory]

How do you know that?

[Damaris]

I was listening to a podcast.

[Mal]

Thank. Thank God.

[Julian]

Of course y'all were terrified.

[Rory]

Of course you were.

[Mal]

Thought you were on the set of fast 10 and forgot.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Don't piss me off.

[Rory]

I was in Cali and yeah, that.

[Damaris]

Janet. Sorry. To marriage. I didn't realize how big of a deal that was for you to answer.

[Mal]

Your final question of we got interrupted. If I found out after the interview was already booked, my ego would be split there because I'm not about to cancel an interview because I just found out you my girl, you gonna show up late. Yeah, like my ego would be conflicted because my ego would be hurt that he. But also like that's if I cancel now. Now because I just found out he beat.

[Rory]

Yeah, you can't, you can't cancel now.

[Mal]

I just have to treat him like pure during the whole interview and try to try to get him cancelled.

[Julian]

He's such a nice guy.

[Damaris]

Try to get him cancel.

[Rory]

Who's a nice guy?

[Julian]

Ian.

[Mal]

Oh, oh, I forgot we were still talking about Ian in a scenario.

[Rory]

I thought he talking about the Rock. I say how you know the Rock is a nice guy.

[Damaris]

He seems like a nice guy.

[Mal]

He definitely like actually a nice guy.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Not like the fake nice guys like every time.

[Rory]

Tell me. I think he's the only one that could beat Trump if he was to run. I had to think the Rock is the only one that could beat Trump.

[Julian]

I really had to like remember that you were talking about like in a political race. Because I'm like in a fight. Like I don't.

[Mal]

No, like Trump is 65.

[Rory]

What?

[Mal]

185. I think clean rock believe that's what.

[Rory]

His doctor said he was 2% body fat.

[Damaris]

Solid.

[Rory]

Solid as a rock.

[Damaris]

He is the rock.

[Julian]

The pebbles.

[Mal]

I think the Rock could, could beat on. I think sneakily, Mark Wahlberg might be able to beat Trump.

[Rory]

No way.

[Mal]

He's got the liberal whites and the blue collar whites.

[Rory]

He's got a Boston accent.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah. But he's a good actor. Some movies he.

[Damaris]

He also used to just beat up Asian people and black people.

[Mal]

I think that's what get him the vote.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I was going to say that would. That's the Republican vote.

[Mal]

That's what I'm saying. Like he has that. He has that history. But now liberal whites like him. Cuz he like, like what a comment.

[Damaris]

Big Jesus guy too.

[Rory]

Yeah. Big burger guy too too. Once you.

[Damaris]

I would never have one of those. Yeah, they're good.

[Mal]

I had a flight canceled in Atlanta and spent six hours in one.

[Damaris]

I had one in Atlanta. Wallburger.

[Mal]

Wallburger. It's good.

[Julian]

I've never had one.

[Mal]

It's really, really not.

[Damaris]

I had it In Atlanta, too.

[Rory]

All right. Yeah. Once you're on burger joints and, you know, used to beat up black and Asian people. Always forgiven. Just give everybody a burger. Yeah.

[Mal]

And like, Boston is like the true American. Wasn't like one of the first cities.

[Julian]

Yeah. But the vegans wouldn't vote for him.

[Damaris]

So you got vegan burgers at Wahlberger.

[Rory]

See.

[Mal]

Who did the vegans ever vote for, though?

[Julian]

The Green Party.

[Rory]

Bernie was our guy.

[Damaris]

Nice.

[Mal]

Bernie was your guy.

[Julian]

Bernie was everybody's guy.

[Rory]

Yeah, Bernie was our guy.

[Damaris]

Bernie's cool, man.

[Mal]

Just feel the burn was not the best.

[Rory]

Yeah, that slogan was. Yeah. Just didn't. It didn't take off the way we wanted it to. It just didn't. It didn't take off the way we kind of wanted it.

[Mal]

That's because when Bernie was around, STDs didn't exist. So he didn't even see the chorus violation.

[Rory]

Julian. So the Supreme Court overruled that thing we was talking about with Trump being taken off the ballot.

[Damaris]

Oh, yeah. I figured. Yeah.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

There's no way they were gonna. Yeah.

[Rory]

No, but, you know, you kind of.

[Damaris]

Felt like, no, that's not.

[Rory]

No, we spoke about it.

[Damaris]

No, we did. And I said, I. I hate when things like this happen because it's obviously not going to stick. And then it's just going to reverse and make it look like he's impervious. It's like, I think it's stupid to keep trying to get him or trap him him when you know it's not going to work. And then all that does is, like, embolden and empower himself and the supporters. None of this shit's actually going to work. So just stop making it a thing. Just let him run. He's going to run.

[Rory]

I've seen a lot of people. Y'all cannot believe the amount of hate hate DMs I got for the. Our DC promo.

[Mal]

Oh, boy, did I get in some as well.

[Rory]

Oh, my God.

[Mal]

So for those that don't know, we put out a promo for our DC show. March 23.

[Rory]

Howard Theater, newroarialmall.com Now tickets are available.

[Mal]

We did a bit of maul watching the speech that sparked everyone to storm the Capitol on January 6th. Mall put on the face paint like the queue of. Of Shiram. Whatever his name is.

[Damaris]

Oh, my God. The Qanon shaman.

[Mal]

Thank you. And dressed like him and then ran out and, you know, just a DC promo. We're having some fun. People had some response.

[Rory]

Oh, my God.

[Mal]

Some negative replies to what we had to do here.

[Rory]

Oh, my God. I just laughed because. All right, so if we're. We're supposed to be able to choose who we want to vote for and, like, have our own opinion on politics and things like that. So I thought. And if you. Not a fan of the show, of course, you see this and you don't follow the show. You don't know what's going on. But for years, I've spoken out about my love for Trump as far as just. Just his demeanor, his attitude of not giving a fuck, and just. It's hysterical to me that he was actually voted as President of the United States. I never voted for him. Never told nobody to vote for him. Don't play. We'll never vote for him. I just love the fact that people get so upset if you're. If you look like you're supporting or you like the person that they are against and they don't. I don't like.

[Mal]

What were some of your favorite replies?

[Rory]

Somebody told me that I'm a coon and if I ever come to D.C. with that on, I'm not coming back home.

[Mal]

Okay.

[Julian]

Damn.

[Rory]

I was like, I don't plan on leaving DC anyway.

[Mal]

Mine weren't as violent. Just some white woman DM me and said, hey, unfollowed you, too, because you co signed that bullshit.

[Rory]

Yeah, you did.

[Mal]

DMing someone to tell that you unfollowed them. It's the craziest thing in the world to me.

[Rory]

I love that, though. I love when those type of people pop out and show their faces. I'm like, okay, y'all, y'all out there.

[Mal]

Right before we sat down to record Peter Rosenberg text me and said, so, what's up with that MAGA Mall bit? Question mark? Question mark?

[Rory]

Cole Rosenberg. Oh, I got it. I got. I got a few things on my mind for fall.

[Julian]

Why?

[Mal]

I like Pete.

[Rory]

No, I do, too. I. With Pete. Why is he asking about them? The bit? Because.

[Mal]

Because Peter's a raging liberal.

[Rory]

He is.

[Mal]

He would say that.

[Rory]

But that's my. But that's my thing. Like, it doesn't matter. I don't care who you vote for. Like, that there's none of my business.

[Mal]

Well, it's a sensitive space where a lot of people are offended. Even if they like comedy and are into sarcasm, are offended by anything Trump related. That's where you. That's the no go comedy zone. You can't even make funny things about.

[Damaris]

Trump, which sucks, because he's easily the funniest.

[Mal]

Funniest human being that's ever.

[Damaris]

Exactly existed quite possibly the funniest person out right now.

[Rory]

Reach out to Shane Gillis about his Trump bid on snl.

[Mal]

I. I don't know. Maybe, yeah.

[Rory]

Want to reach out about our trip.

[Mal]

But I don't know. I don't know if. And we'll use Pete the same way we used Ian in our podverse. I don't think people like Peter likes Shane Gillis.

[Damaris]

Oh, no way.

[Mal]

Yeah, I don't think they're in it.

[Rory]

People that like Peter, that are like Peter, like, okay.

[Mal]

And I'm not saying Pete may actually really like him, but the super white liberals, I don't think like Shanghilis.

[Damaris]

Nah, like at all. Enough people like him that he got a greenlit show at Netflix. One of his like shorts is. They signed it for a series of tires.

[Rory]

I believe all is forgiven because a.

[Mal]

Lot of the people on that far, far left side think that if you make any joke joke that shows Trump even in a funny and not negative light, you're part of the problem. If you make any joke about Joe Biden or anything Democratic, you are now co signing Trump. And now you're part of the problem. Like, because. Because Trump is so bad, you can never bring up anything wrong with the Democratic Party at all. Or you're now co signing the right. That's how that far left thinks. And that happens with comedy too. And Shane Gill Willis, who admittedly thinks Trump is out of his mind, makes jokes that make Trump look better in a light because it's funny. And he shits on Joe Biden.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

So he's part of the problem. Well, he's the reason why the Democrats are going to lose him specifically.

[Rory]

Well, we had fun shooting that and hopefully people come out. March 23, Howard Theater, Jon Stewart, just.

[Damaris]

To close what Rory was saying, Jon Stewart's done a good job on his once a week thing with airing out both sides. Like, and he's not, he's not just Trump. He airs out Biden. And I think because of his comfort with doing that, other people are now more comfortable making fun of the easiest shit in the world about Biden. He has dementia and he's old as shit.

[Mal]

But have you seen the pushback off Jon Stewart's first episode when he was going at both sides?

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

The liberals went fucking nuts at him.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Because this is not the Jon Stewart we wanted. Like, of course he's calling Joe Biden.

[Damaris]

Old, but I think it's settled now. And people are like, oh, now we can also make fun of of. It's so lame. If you're just protecting one side. And can. They can both.

[Rory]

It's stupid.

[Damaris]

Both can get it. It's funny.

[Rory]

It's stupid. But either way. March 23, Howard Theater, D.C. we will be in the building. The tickets available now newroarimal.com Come on, let's have some fun.

[Mal]

I wish. I wish Meek had some better people in his circle because Usher did exactly what you should do. Anytime you're in some paperwork, doing some freaking.

[Rory]

Go to Bali.

[Mal]

Go to Bali with Russell Simmons.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Just get out of dodge. Go with the one person that knew how to escape all sexual assaults or accusations of doing some freaky.

[Rory]

It wasn't no sexual assault from us at all.

[Mal]

I know. Or freaky.

[Rory]

Oh, okay. Yeah.

[Mal]

But I mean, even just being in that paperwork, as far as like drugging and underage, even though Usher, he was still next to that, I think. I think Bali was. Was the best option. I don't know about doing yoga with Uncle Rush over there.

[Rory]

Yeah, go to Bali. But don't take no pictures with Russ. That. That. Let's. Let's leave it at that. You can go to Bali. Bali is beautiful. It's great. So I heard. Heard great things about it. Hope to get there one day myself. But yeah, you should probably not take pictures with. With Russ.

[Mal]

I listen. I was shocked that Usher did this with how his brand is going.

[Rory]

Yep.

[Mal]

With that Vegas residency. Of course, Usher was always Usher, but I think it was a big revamp in Usher's career and the legacy side of what he's doing. Obviously super bowl, you have to have the most squeaky clean image ever. To then go right to a country with someone that has pending charges out the ass for sexual assault was a. Was a bold move.

[Rory]

Yeah. And a move to. That we never really see Usher take or make.

[Mal]

I thought. I thought Russell Simmons was photoshopped as a joke in the background of that photo.

[Rory]

It does.

[Mal]

I thought someone was like making a horrible joke because he was in Bali, that he was with Russell Simmons doing yoga. That's really Russell Simmons.

[Rory]

But where is that at now, though? The whole The. Because I know the documentary came out about Russell Simmons and sexual assault, but after that it kind of got quiet. Like I didn't even hear nothing else.

[Mal]

Yeah, I mean, he. He escaped at the right time and let die down. And then he got back on socials, I think, like last year and still got backlash in his comments. But still, people didn't care that much. His disappearing act worked. I hate to say that even with the situations with his daughters and all that public like him because he was. Him just being out of.

[Rory]

Orlee was on live a few months ago saying that their relationship was strained and she was broke. She didn't have some crazy shit that she was saying. And I was just like, yo, what the fuck is going on right now? Yeah, like, because you never expect to hear stories like that from certain people. So to see Kamara Lee on IG Live and Aaron out there, you know. Yeah, it just. Things just go away sometimes where you just didn't expect it. And it's unfortunate and it's. It's honestly like, you know, it's fucked up because these are people that you held in such a high regard at one point or another. And to see where things end up sometimes is unfortunate. We all are. We all. We are all human and things happen. I understand that. But it's certain things that you just don't expect to hear about certain people. So.

[Mal]

New music. It was a. A good new Music Friday.

[Rory]

I was scared. Scared.

[Mal]

Why were you scared?

[Rory]

Schoolboy has a. He has a great catalog. To me, so far, all his albums are pretty solid. Pretty good albums, pretty good music. But this was officially Life after Kendrick for tde. So we just, you know, this one was a little more. There's a little more pressure on this album. So I was kind of nervous at first. But after hearing the album over the weekend and, and getting to the music, I think Life after after Kendrick for TDE is in great hand. Fans.

[Mal]

Yeah, I think the rollout was cool, at least to hit the core fan base. I thought the visuals were great. The records they put out two weeks ago. I know he's doing press later. He wanted to do press post album rather than before. So I don't doubt that it won't get the attention that it deserves. I think it's great. I think it's the best Schoolboy's ever rapped. Rapping. Rapping on this. Not to say he wasn't before, but this I feel like is the best shape he's been in as a rapper. Rapper.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Like this was some cool laid back rap, I think, production wise. I love the switch ups. I love that he gave the soulful. I love that he, you know, gave more of the trappy side of stuff that he's done in the past. And I was on Spaces talking with. I forgot the listener's name, but we were just talking about Gibbs and Schoolboy as being like those two rappers that are gang members but make you feel like they're cool guys that just live next Door to you. Like, they're personable, they have personality. They do rap about gang and violent, but they feel like just nice guys that you already know.

[Rory]

Right.

[Mal]

And that's rare, I think, in hip hop, when you have people like Schoolboy and Gibbs coming from where they come from, that they still have, you know, the same inflection, personality, the way, like, Mac Miller has, like, I know that kid.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

I feel like Freddy and Schoolboy have that as well. When they're also rapping about where typically that type of content doesn't allow you to be that person. Like, no time during YG My Crazy Life, which I think is a classic album, they'll be like, yo, this is like a guy I'd like to hang out with.

[Rory]

Yeah. No, I feel not once. I think he. He treated this album like this may have been. Which I think is a good way to approach each album that you do to an extent. I think he treated this album like this was going to be the first time a lot of people heard him or heard who. Whose Schoolboy Q is or forgot about him or forgot about him.

[Mal]

He took a lot of time off.

[Rory]

Yeah. So far, so good, man. Life after Kendrick looks good for TD for sure.

[Mal]

Also, sir announced his album, I think March 22nd. It's coming out. Put out a track list as well.

[Rory]

Now. Somebody DM me over the weekend. It was some. It was a fake page of somebody, but they just told me. They was like, listen, man, I'm only reaching out to you because I fuck with you, fuck with your platform, but let you know before the thing pops. Sir is going to be dropped from TDE for some crazy, I guess, allegations or charges that are coming. But that's what somebody DM me. I didn't pay no mind. I didn't really go back because it was like a page with no followers. No, it was just like, yo, sir, it's gonna be dropped from tde.

[Damaris]

Did they specify what I think.

[Rory]

I believe the person said it was supposed to be like, some sexual assault charges or something like that.

[Mal]

Oh, wow. Well, that's. I mean, I don't want to say just from a fake page that.

[Julian]

That.

[Rory]

Yeah, I just think.

[Mal]

But even Punch was just.

[Rory]

And I was like, word.

[Mal]

Punch was just tweeting yesterday about everyone that was cooking up at TDE currently, and I believe he said sir. So, yeah, I don't know where that's at, but did he actually announce. Did I. Maybe I saw a fake thing.

[Damaris]

No, this is. This is on his page. Here's a. A track list Heavy. The album's called Heavy. He released the COVID art in the track list.

[Rory]

List.

[Damaris]

Gotcha. Oh, this was posted 30 minutes ago.

[Rory]

This right here. Oh, so maybe that person don't know what the you talking about.

[Mal]

And I believe there was a track list on Twitter.

[Damaris]

Well, here's. I mean we got a titalisign future Isaiah Rashad Anderson pack Absol Scribs riley looks like 16 records.

[Mal]

Cool. Well, I mean I am looking.

[Rory]

There might be another artist over there that doesn't have a whack album.

[Mal]

No, definitely.

[Damaris]

I was listening to Chasing Summers over the weekend. That 65 degree weather day. Yeah, it was one of those like I threw that on when I was outside. It's. It's a. That's a nice outdoor album.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

No, Sir. Sir's catalog is.

[Rory]

Well, hopefully that person at DM me don't know what the they talking about and all that is because that would be just.

[Mal]

That would be unfortunate.

[Rory]

That would be unfortunate because sir is one of those artists that I with Heavy and I would hate to see something like that happen to him in his career. But definitely looking forward to a new sir project.

[Mal]

Yeah. Cardi B dropped. What is it? The what what if? Freestyle directed by co. Directed by Offset and Damaris.

[Damaris]

Like the like what? Freestyle.

[Julian]

Like what?

[Mal]

So Julian is convinced that she bit this entire song from what's his name? Slump God.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Julian is convinced. Same flow, same lyrics, same beat. Obviously Slump God produced that beat obviously. So you know, I. I smell a lawsuit in his favor. I can't believe this wasn't cleared by his. His camp. What do we think about the record?

[Rory]

I thought it was cool.

[Mal]

I actually really like it.

[Rory]

Yeah, I thought it was cool. But it's just a freestyle though.

[Mal]

But that's. That's how Cardi popped to begin with. So I can see. I see why they went back back while they're still trying to search for that main single. Yeah, put a freestyle out in Justin Bieber's old house.

[Julian]

That's his old house.

[Mal]

Yeah. I only know that because. Yeah, look at houses online. Too much for a ditty party? No, I've never been there before nor was I ever invited. But I saw that it was on the market, that interesting looking house and it was like Justin Bieber's old house on sale. And then I saw the video and I was like, look at that. Maybe Cardi bought it.

[Rory]

Maybe.

[Mal]

But I think it's a cool freestyle.

[Rory]

It's cool. I like it.

[Mal]

One of my favorite Missy Elliott beats.

[Rory]

I can't go wrong with that.

[Mal]

What's. Yeah, there's nothing here to hate on, and I don't think there's anything here to praise. I just think it's a cool record. In the meantime.

[Rory]

Yeah, something to keep the people talking and keep, you know, keep her name in the conversation and things like that until she gives us, obviously, the single from the new album.

[Mal]

But the pressure's on because at the end of the video, it said, this is just the beginning.

[Julian]

And then she previewed a song that she had previewed before. Like, she, like, left a snippet of a song she. She had previewed before in the club that every. All the fans are, like, kind of waiting on.

[Damaris]

So that's supposed to be the one.

[Mal]

And I'm saying it's cool with this freestyle. I love it. I think it'll. It'll work for what it should do. Pressure's on now, that next one.

[Rory]

That has to be the signal, the next song.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah.

[Rory]

But she said she's dropping this shit. All right.

[Damaris]

She been saying that, though.

[Mal]

But wasn't it something like 2019?

[Rory]

But wasn't it something like the top of the year that I. I think.

[Julian]

She said, yeah, at the bottom. At the end of last year, she said, yeah, it's coming in 20. 24.

[Rory]

Okay, got it.

[Julian]

But, you know, it's been a.

[Damaris]

You said the same thing about 23, though.

[Julian]

A lot of conversations have been. She never said she was dropping at 23.

[Damaris]

The people at her record label said she was supposed to drop in 23.

[Mal]

Okay. Yeah, but, you know, like, Covid and everything in 23.

[Damaris]

Covid.

[Rory]

You know, crazy.

[Julian]

A lot of people are saying she's scared. I do think that she's scared, and I think she has every reason to be scared, unfortunately, with the way that success is measured these days.

[Mal]

Oh, I mean, scared of what we had. Ben said she was scared after the Dirk and Kanye record. They thought that was going to be the one. It did not work at all. And she disappeared. Of course she's terrified.

[Julian]

I think she's a criticism. I think she's afraid to not go number one. That's what I think.

[Mal]

She set a precedent that's too high to maintain.

[Rory]

She's gonna go number one when she drops.

[Julian]

You don't. We don't.

[Damaris]

But even if that. And then what a conversation we've had.

[Mal]

The album or the single?

[Rory]

The album.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

She'll probably go number one matching that success from Invasion. It's not gonna happen. You're never gonna hit that high again.

[Rory]

Okay, cool. I Not against you on that. You don't think that if she drops an album that it will debut no number one.

[Damaris]

But number one doesn't mean the. Like you're. You're being measured against yourself. And nothing she drops is going to top Invasion of Privacy.

[Rory]

Maybe not.

[Damaris]

Which is why I've always said.

[Mal]

But does anyone, music or Bad Bunny, top that album does what? There's only three artists, I think, that could top that.

[Damaris]

But that's not their bar. That's her bar. Like, she put the album out, but.

[Mal]

Everyone'S bar is lower. Even their bars are lower.

[Rory]

I just think. I just think that we. We now it's. And we talked about this. Dropping an album now is almost. People move on from albums so quick now. So you have an artist that probably worked on an album for a year, year and a half, sometimes two years, and they put an album out and then in three weeks after the album come out, a month after the album comes out, nobody's even talking about it because so many other albums have come after to that. Because every week we get.

[Damaris]

But albums are just inherently promo to go on tour. No artist makes money from their out.

[Rory]

It's just. But. But it was also. Yeah, but it was never. There was never a time where music was dropping. Like, this is the. This is a different time now.

[Mal]

But to what he's saying, you can't really tour off putting out three or four singles. Yeah, like I'm put. I'm doing this tour.

[Damaris]

I mean, at this point, it's what, five years or so since Invasion of Privacy? Cardi could just do an anniversary.

[Rory]

How many songs was on that episode that Ice Spice Drop? Was it five, six, something like that? Probably. She's been doing festivals, right? She's been.

[Mal]

Yeah, but Cardi could always do festivals. But to do your own tour. And I'm sure Cardi would be six records shooting for an arena tour. Not saying that that's something she can do in every city, but she'd be shooting for that. You can't do that off singles. You need an album to do an arena tour.

[Rory]

Yeah, okay, so she's scared. But how long Because.

[Mal]

And she's an album artist, whether we like to admit that or not. She set, to Julian's point, a very high precedent for herself. She is an album artist, of course.

[Rory]

She won a rap album of the year. Of course she's an album artist. Yeah.

[Damaris]

That album's four times platinum.

[Rory]

I just think now is different though, because like Rory said to do a tour, she's obviously gonna do some Arenas in certain cities. I almost think that she has to do an arena in every city.

[Mal]

I mean the barbs would say, yeah, and if she doesn't, they're.

[Rory]

This is what you think she could.

[Damaris]

Do because you know, five years is always a landmark date in, in music in terms of catalog promotion. You think if she announced an invasion of privacy five year tour, she could do an arena tour?

[Rory]

That should not be. Yeah, but she got to put out a new album before that.

[Mal]

Like, is she going to the arena in Seattle or is she just hitting major mar markets with arenas for a five year anniversary?

[Rory]

She got. She.

[Mal]

No matter what, I think she needs support. If she's doing an arena, she has.

[Rory]

To put out a new album before five year engaging a privacy tour.

[Julian]

Yes.

[Rory]

There's no way.

[Mal]

That'd be crazy.

[Rory]

There's no, there's no way, like, and I know, you know, I. With Cardi, but she has to put out a new album before we could even talk about an invasion of privacy five years, six year, whatever fucking tour. Like, no, no, we need. There has to be a new album that's out.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

And I, and I, you know, and I get the hesitancy of behind artists wanting to drop after having such success from the previous album as Cardi. But again, it's like people move on from projects and albums so fast now. It's almost like you want an artist to drop an album for what, so you can talk about it for five days and, and, and then a month from now you don't even listen to the album no more.

[Julian]

And with her, it's going to be so many comparisons. Oh yeah, she. It's like everyone is awaiting Cardi's downfall. And even if everyone isn't awaiting it, I'm sure that she feels that way.

[Rory]

It's not the downfall. I don't think people are awaiting her downfall. I. Certain group is, well, that, well, certain. There's certain groups out there that wait on everybody's downfall. That's, that's neither here nor there. I think the bigger thing is, is people are like, okay, show us that first one wasn't a fluke.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Because the success that she's had off of her debut album, there are not many artists that have had success like that off of their debut album, especially rap. Like she got a Super bowl halftime offer off of one album. She won rap album of the year off her first album. She got a Pepsi commercial off her first album. Like she did shit that it's like, what the fuck? And we talking about rap this Isn't R and B. This isn't pop. This is. This is rap we're talking about. So I just think that it's. It gets to that point where it's like, she knows that the people are waiting to see. Like, all right, was the first one a fluke? Or, like, you really. That dope of an artist.

[Damaris]

You can't even fluke that high, though. You know what I mean? Like, you can't fake why you can't.

[Rory]

You.

[Damaris]

You can't. Like, that's.

[Rory]

It's just buttons being pushed.

[Damaris]

But there's also.

[Rory]

You start talking about endorsements and things like that. That's just the machine doing his job.

[Damaris]

This was the longest charting album by a female rapper ever.

[Mal]

Every song on there is a single.

[Rory]

Cool.

[Damaris]

Every song is platinum.

[Rory]

Great. That's amazing. But now you have to give us another one. We have to. We have to see what the second one sounds like.

[Damaris]

Then that's where I start to say, you don't have to give them, and honestly don't.

[Julian]

The people who enjoyed her first album are gonna enjoy the second album, and the people who are waiting to say the first one wasn't that good and it didn't deserve all its awards are gonna say that this one sucks.

[Mal]

I don't know if that's true, because I really enjoyed the first album, and there's been singles that I've hated. Like, I like this freestyle a lot, but I'm more interested in what that snippet at the end was for that real single. I really love the first one. I'm not saying I'm. I hope I enjoy the second one, but I'm not. Just because I enjoy the first one doesn't mean I'm gonna love the second one. And I think the pressure's on.

[Julian]

Do you re. Listen to the first one, or were you a creature of the moment when it came out? The mo. Where you heard it and how you heard it affected did what you.

[Mal]

Yeah, I don't. I don't listen to Cardi B in my car by myself when I'm driving, but, yeah, you do that. Any song from that album could be put in a playlist for a kickback or a party. If we were doing something in the studio, every song on there, I would put on a playlist currently, right now to listen to and enjoy it.

[Damaris]

You guys think Wap and Up will be on the second album? No, those were members supposed to be the first two.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

If it is, I think that's corny, but I get it. I get why they would do it.

[Rory]

It will be on album.

[Damaris]

WAP came out in 2020.

[Mal]

I don't think it'll be sequenced. I think it would be like, the last song.

[Rory]

However, wherever y'all want to put that on the album, it's going to be.

[Mal]

On that album to be the intro.

[Rory]

I guarantee you WOP is on that album. Without a doubt.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Come out August 2020.

[Mal]

I also think the pressure is kind of on.

[Damaris]

That's crazy.

[Mal]

Two for Cardi, outside of everything we've talked about and been talking about, Nikki did not flop.

[Rory]

Who said she?

[Mal]

Dude, nobody said that. I'm saying the pressure is now on even more because Nikki did not flop.

[Rory]

Oh, okay.

[Mal]

Like, Nikki did great numbers, had good reception, had successful singles.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

If Nikki flopped, it'd be. I think Cardi would take more risks and be able to just try some. Because Nikki flopped.

[Rory]

See, but I even. That. I just hate where. I hate it too.

[Julian]

Yeah, I hate it, too, because I.

[Rory]

Ain'T never listen to when boys to men drop. Like, yo, I take six, y'all in trouble. Like, I never, like. You know what I'm saying, bro? I ain't never, like, yo, take six, what y'all gonna do? Cause the Motown, these. These from Philly just dropped the bomb. Like, I never did that. Like, you just take artists from what they give you. You listen to it, you like it, you like it. You don't. You don't. But, like, it's just corny that now we're like, yo, Nicki ain't flop. Cardi, what you gonna do?

[Mal]

It's just like, what's Jodeci gonna do?

[Rory]

Yeah, like, let Cardi be Cardi. Let Nicki be. Like. You know what I'm saying? Like, I never.

[Mal]

The truth is just not what it is, unfortunately.

[Rory]

I understand that, but that's. It just. It's just whack that that's where it is now. It's like, damn, bro. Like, artists like you, artists at home, just, like, on the Internet, reading everything that people saying about them, and it's just like, justice had a really interesting post where he said the comment section on social media killed the artist.

[Mal]

He has a point, because.

[Rory]

Yeah, he did. He said, you know, artists get in there and they start reading certain things that people are saying about their song or saying about their. Their outfit or whatever, and then you start doing things with that shit programmed in your mind, like, oh, what are people gonna say? It's like, who gives a fuck? Like, if you're an artist, try something different. Be yourself Be unique. Don't be afraid to fail. Like, if you. Like, if you really feel passionate about this song and this record, put it out now. You can't do that. Cause you always got these voices in the back of your head. It was just like, yo, this might happen. That might happen. Or they wasn't feeling this or comparing it to this. It's like, yo, what happened to just like, being passionate about something, being creative, and then, you know, letting the chips fall where they gonna fall.

[Mal]

It unfortunately made it where instead of the artists dictating the sound, the fans dictate it, and the fans have no idea what the fuck they like. It's actually the artist's job to make us like something new because we don't have the brains that they have. That's why we look up to them and love their music, create. They have the vision to change the, like, landscape. Do we think. I mean, Andre 3000 is probably a bad example, but in this era, do you think we'd get the love below if there was a comment section, or do you think we would get a bunch more Ms. Jackson's? No, yeah, we get a bunch more Ms. Jackson.

[Rory]

Jackson for sure.

[Mal]

Which isn't bad. But it's like he made us, like, that sound.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Like, we didn't go into it thinking, like, oh, man, Andre is supposed to give us this. And I. He's like, if this is what he's on, I'm a listen.

[Rory]

Cause I respect him and had the number. It debuted at number one.

[Mal]

And then we fucking revered that album. And it changed music for the better.

[Damaris]

You saw him and Big Boy. Speaking of Andre, him and Big Boy linked up.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Yeah. Andre had a show in Atlanta this weekend for the new Blue sun album. So he had a show in Atlanta, and obviously Big Boy was there to support. And they took pictures, videos together. As, you know, the Internet is talking. Or they might be back in. You can't even take a picture with your boy that you grew up with at his first show for his flute album.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Without people talking about, yo, when that new outcast, it's just like, bro. Yeah.

[Mal]

Did people not realize that Three Stacks used to go to all Big Boy's son's high school football games?

[Rory]

Yeah. Like, it's just. It's. These are real. This is family. This is. These are real friends. These are brothers supporting one another. But 3,000 did say that he does Ms. Brat.

[Mal]

I saw that.

[Rory]

And, you know, he's. You know, whenever the spitters say shit like that, that means, oh, you about five Songs in already, like, cut it out. Don't tell me you missed rap.

[Mal]

That's mean to me.

[Rory]

Yeah, like. Yeah, like, don't tell me you miss rap. 3000 and you not six songs in for the new album. Like, we not. Come on, cut the shit, man.

[Mal]

Say that when you have a release date in March.

[Rory]

Yeah, like, tell me you missed the. Tell me you missed rap. And then two weeks from now, drop the album.

[Mal]

Don't tell me you miss it when you actually just miss it and are considering doing it.

[Rory]

Yeah, yeah, I don't wanna hear that shit.

[Mal]

Don't play with my heartstrings.

[Rory]

Yeah, I don't wanna hear that shit. But I do believe that he's back and he's recording, and then we will get a. A 3000 album or project of some sort soon.

[Mal]

Yeah. Before we get to voicemails, want to say congratulations to Jason Kelce. Just retired. One of the greatest centers of all time.

[Rory]

Absolutely.

[Mal]

He had a press conference to announce everything, and it. It made me feel like he was sort of dirty macking on the rest of us. I don't really like when husbands and, like, really good guys show how good they are to the whole world and make it harder for the rest of us.

[Damaris]

Rory's such a hater, bro.

[Mal]

Just. Just click this. He starts crying, talking about his beautiful wife and their children after retirement.

[Damaris]

Yeah, God forbid. He's in love.

[Mal]

Buffalo Billiards, where my life would change forever. Thought he's retiring from the NFL.

[Rory]

Night I'd meet my future wife.

[Mal]

Now I have to go make a crying video.

[Rory]

I still remember the moment she walked through the door.

[Mal]

Come on, this isn't a funeral.

[Damaris]

The first instance biggest hater is burned in my retina.

[Mal]

Don't say retina. You have eyes.

[Rory]

And then wipe your eye. She glided through the opening.

[Mal]

She glided around. Buffalo Wild Wings.

[Julian]

Oh.

[Mal]

Then she started talking.

[Damaris]

She got a voice, too.

[Mal]

Man, he lets his women do that.

[Damaris]

You thought Lil Durk was the voice?

[Julian]

That's what love feels.

[Rory]

She was beautiful. Smart, serious, yet playful. I knew it right away. I think it's no coincidence.

[Mal]

I have enjoyed my best years of my career with Kylie by my side.

[Rory]

Every accolade I have ever received has come in my life. This is. This is. This is. This is. Is the. This is the classic case of a. That got caught cheating.

[Mal]

Don't do that.

[Rory]

And his wife was like, listen, you got to go up there when you announce your retirement and confess your love for me. It's the only way I'm getting over this.

[Julian]

Do you think everything's in cynical terms with cynical eye view. Like, nothing can ever.

[Mal]

Just cynical retinas, please.

[Rory]

Retinas. As he grabs it. As soon as he said retin, he grabbed the top.

[Damaris]

They're both hating from different sides. Rory's hating because this guy's actually in love. Love. It's almost hating because he thinks everything is. Because it's a cover for something else.

[Mal]

It's not that I'm.

[Rory]

Is it not.

[Mal]

Okay, I'm hating, but I have reason for my hating. I think it's beautiful that he's in love and they have beautiful children. That entire thing. But, like, when Kia, like, reposts this on her story now, it's tougher in my household because I have a microphone in front of my face all the time. I don't cry.

[Rory]

Your girl reposted this?

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Mal]

It's like, oh, this is a beautiful, loving thing.

[Rory]

I just don't think this is something.

[Mal]

You think she was the one that he cheated on with? Is that what you get?

[Rory]

I just don't think. How did this land on Kia's algorithms?

[Mal]

Because he's. It's a guy talking about his wife that ends up in algorithms.

[Rory]

Yeah, I guess.

[Mal]

Crying over your wife.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

So now I'm gonna have to figure out how to, like, get some tears going on a pod.

[Rory]

He doesn't have any tears going.

[Mal]

He's crying.

[Rory]

He's crying.

[Damaris]

You see?

[Rory]

You see any tears? Mall.

[Damaris]

He's crying.

[Rory]

I'm asking you, do you see any tears?

[Damaris]

Yeah, there were some.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

No, he's crying the way a NFL center would cry.

[Rory]

He cry on the inside.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

He's got a body. Cry.

[Rory]

Yeah, he cries on the inside.

[Damaris]

Retinas.

[Rory]

Yeah. His retinas don't get watery. Yeah.

[Mal]

This just. You don't think this just makes it tougher for the rest of us out here when guys do this type of not.

[Rory]

Well, no, not me. No.

[Mal]

I remember one of my. One of my frat. Two of my frat brothers were dating, like, best friends friends, and one of them wrote a poem on Facebook, like a whole confessing the love. And two of my frat brothers had a full falling out because he didn't warn him ahead of time that he was going to do the poem thing because immediately his girl looked at him and was like, well, my best friend just got a poem on Facebook. He's like, yo, can you ghost write me a poem before you do this?

[Rory]

Right now?

[Mal]

I have to keep up with you. And he cries.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's what I'm Saying that's why I don't feel no dispute. It doesn't make it tough for me. Like, I. Jason wanted to cry and give his wife, you know, some light on his retirement announcement. Cool.

[Mal]

Well, no, I. I just look like a. Because I've only seen my girlfriend walk. I've never seen her glide. Glide? Yeah, like, babe, I'm sorry. I've just only seen your feet on the ground. I didn't know how to describe that.

[Rory]

A lot of these chicks don't glide, though. They walk. So it's just a lot of walking going on. It's not too much gliding.

[Damaris]

Speaking of a first date speak. I heard you walking down the whole hallway.

[Mal]

Damaris. If you see. If you see a friend. If you see a friend of yours being treated publicly in a great manner, like, some guy wrote a poem in his IG comments about her. You look at, like, your man sort of a way that he hasn't penned a poem for you on Instagram.

[Julian]

Depends. I feel like different people show love in different ways.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

What if he didn't write a poem, but he ate her ass that night?

[Julian]

No, that's regular. That's, like, expected reading. I'm talking about, like, yeah, we're true.

[Rory]

That's regular.

[Julian]

Some men.

[Mal]

That's the worst.

[Julian]

It goes back to our love, language, conversation.

[Rory]

Some people don't even look like. She would. She would laugh if a started saying a poem to, like, reading a poem.

[Julian]

No, I wouldn't. I do poetry. I would never laugh if somebody did.

[Mal]

And I feel like you judge his rhymes. I don't think.

[Rory]

You don't do poetry. You rap.

[Mal]

That's true.

[Julian]

Well, I. I do both. I'm Pac.

[Damaris]

Oh, fam. I.

[Rory]

You know what? All this time, you've been sitting there.

[Mal]

And I never gotta hear a rose.

[Rory]

Yeah. I never knew Pac was sitting right here. A rose that grew in Syracuse.

[Julian]

Y'all had a lot of smoke for. It's so funny. A lot of people retweeted that clip of Mar saying, ain't no good in Syracuse. Was like, boy, I got something I could put them on to.

[Damaris]

Like, that's sick.

[Julian]

Popping your shit.

[Rory]

None of that. I'm cool.

[Mal]

That's crazy. You don't think there's good in Syracuse?

[Rory]

There's definitely good in Syracuse. There's good everywhere on this planet.

[Mal]

Every town.

[Rory]

That's why I told you the other day, I ain't never. When. When the dude said, it's a shortage out here. It ain't never been a shortage of pussy. I don't Care what's going on? We went through a pandemic. 911. One thing a. A police officer did not yell at 911 was. Yo, it ain't no more out here. You ain't never hear cops say that.

[Mal]

A shortage on where even with the amount of deaths that day, still no short as a pussy.

[Rory]

It's everywhere.

[Julian]

To go back to Rory's original point. Different people have different love languages.

[Mal]

So any bad die in 911?

[Rory]

No, of course bad don't work.

[Mal]

Yeah, I was gonna say I'm sorry. My bad. I just didn't see the photos of everyone. I've been down to the memorial. I saw the names.

[Rory]

Bad bitches don't go to work.

[Damaris]

Wasn't the top floor like a restaurant? Maybe a waitress or two?

[Mal]

Yeah, you got. I think. Yeah, Windows. I think it was called Windows. Windows.

[Damaris]

Windows. Yeah.

[Rory]

There.

[Damaris]

We gotta have some lookers up there.

[Mal]

For sure.

[Damaris]

You can't have some Dorothy's walking around hand now cocktails.

[Rory]

No, but it's different. Those are like real waitresses. Like those are not like bartenders and star tenders and things like that.

[Damaris]

No, because you gotta. You're walking a thin line. Because it is all the. The finance men that probably want.

[Rory]

Oh they escorts. Yeah. Yeah.

[Damaris]

But they were like, you know, that's.

[Rory]

Coast don't work with a dime.

[Mal]

And escorts are resourceful. I feel like they got to the staircase quicker than most.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

They know how to exit a building. They were already in a very timely manner in heels.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's tough. But my bad. Damaris. I didn't know you was the two pocket issue.

[Mal]

And anyone victims of 9 11. Sorry.

[Rory]

Yeah, sorry about that. All right.

[Julian]

Just a lot of apologies being given out.

[Rory]

Right.

[Damaris]

That's what the flag's for. Honestly.

[Rory]

Got a 911 flag.

[Mal]

Never forget, never forget, never forget. Well, thank you. Never forget Jason Kelsey for your contributions to the NFL and to an argument that I'll probably have to have tonight. Really appreciate that.

[Damaris]

Speaking of us.

[Julian]

Well, you have the mic right now Cry. Spit your cry.

[Mal]

I cry.

[Rory]

Can you cry on demand?

[Mal]

No.

[Julian]

Yes, he can.

[Rory]

I used to be able to. I can't no more.

[Mal]

You're a sociopath.

[Damaris]

Crying with you guys cry when you caught onions.

[Mal]

Yes. Well, not cry per se, but. Yeah, no, I'm not a stingy.

[Julian]

I'm not new to this. You put a wet napkin next to it and it collects all the moisture from the onion.

[Rory]

Wow, you ain't even had that trick in your mask Matchbook portfolio.

[Mal]

How close do I need to hold the wet napkin.

[Julian]

Put the wet napkin just right next to the onion.

[Mal]

Really?

[Damaris]

Just, like, loose. You don't, like, wrap it?

[Julian]

No, because you're cutting the onion.

[Damaris]

Cut a wet napkin?

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

What are you chopping up? The wet napkin.

[Damaris]

Cut it, take it off. It's like taking off the skin of an onion.

[Rory]

You gotta take the. I heard about taking a match and, like, putting it off like a toothpick and, like.

[Mal]

Oh, it'll soak up.

[Damaris]

Did you guys see. Speaking of first dates, did you see the. That Outback Steakhouse? Remember that whole argument we had about, like, women are better than the Cheesecake Factory?

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

LeBron and Savannah's first date was at the Outback Steakhouse in Akron, Ohio, and it shut down. It shut down.

[Mal]

They were 13.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

LeBron's probably gonna pay for that to stay open.

[Damaris]

But they were sad. And people were jumping on Twitter being like, look, if LeBron can take, you know, Savannah to.

[Julian]

They were like, 15.

[Damaris]

You can go to cheesecake.

[Rory]

Yeah. But they were like high school. Like, Outback was, like, the spot to go to.

[Damaris]

I don't know. Blooming onion hits still.

[Rory]

A what?

[Damaris]

Blooming onion.

[Rory]

A blue onion.

[Julian]

Blooming onion.

[Rory]

I don't know what that is.

[Damaris]

It's vegan.

[Mal]

I don't know what is either.

[Rory]

Well, the onion.

[Julian]

Yeah, it's a deep fried onion.

[Rory]

Ah, no, I'm cool.

[Julian]

You say you're cool until you have it.

[Damaris]

No, it's very good.

[Rory]

I don't like onions like that.

[Damaris]

You never had a blooming onion?

[Rory]

Oh, yeah, I've had that.

[Mal]

Wait, that's just, like, fried. That's like, just onion rings that don't ring, right?

[Rory]

Yeah, a little different than.

[Damaris]

I don't know, it could be the seasoning.

[Julian]

Did he say onion rings don't ring?

[Mal]

Yeah, you know, let's say they don't make a ring.

[Damaris]

Yeah, Well, I mean, they're.

[Mal]

I thought that was a great explanation of what it was.

[Rory]

Right. LeBron will probably pay for that. Whatever, like, financial situation in. I could see him like, that Cheesecake Factory. Is it Outback? I can see him buying that and keeping it open.

[Mal]

Is Outback good?

[Julian]

It's okay.

[Damaris]

It's not bad.

[Rory]

I. I mean, I'm. I don't think for Usdh. I don't think LeBron has been there in years.

[Damaris]

So this was. Yeah. Savannah had posted, like, no, our first date memories. And then LeBron, they were on Twitter.

[Julian]

Making fun of him. He said, oh, my God. Why? Why? Why, like.

[Rory]

And he didn't say that.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Wherever he was At. He didn't say. He wasn't screaming.

[Julian]

Why he was not.

[Mal]

That's how you know he was taking money under the table. He could already afford outback at 13.

[Rory]

He was. He was on high school at 13.

[Julian]

He was like 15, 16.

[Damaris]

He pulled up to the Outback in a Hummer.

[Mal]

He was.

[Rory]

He was on the team, definitely in a Hummer.

[Damaris]

H1 in Akron, Ohio, age 2. H1.

[Mal]

How did no one say anything?

[Rory]

What was they gonna say?

[Mal]

How did you get a Hummer? LeBron James.

[Julian]

They knew how he got the Hummer.

[Rory]

Yeah, my mom bought it for me.

[Mal]

Ms. James, how did you get that?

[Damaris]

You got it for his 18th birthday. That's how every kid for their 18th birthday gets age two hummer.

[Rory]

Yeah, duh.

[Mal]

I've seen super sweet 16. That's hilarious. They just. They did that to some poor kid in Jersey City. His mom was riding around in a bends on JFK Boulevard, and he was about to go to Arizona.

[Rory]

Arizona them up.

[Julian]

Do you guys have, like. Do you guys have, like a. A dedicated chain restaurant that you'll never give up no matter who talks?

[Mal]

Cheesecake for sure is up there for me.

[Julian]

Really?

[Mal]

I love.

[Damaris]

Cheesecake's great. You can get so many different things there.

[Mal]

I don't mind. I don't mind chain restaurants, to be honest.

[Damaris]

Oh, not fast food.

[Julian]

Not fast food. And not bougie chain. So not Morton's.

[Rory]

That's Bougie.

[Julian]

Bougie chain for a chain. It's Bougie chain. Not Philippe.

[Rory]

Like, I don't like Philippe. That food is terrible.

[Mal]

I'm with you.

[Julian]

I'm talking about just regular, like, you.

[Damaris]

Know, I guess cheesecake would be the one.

[Mal]

Then Brooklyn Shop House. Well, there's two of them.

[Rory]

It's a chain, right?

[Mal]

It's one in Brooklyn, one in the city.

[Rory]

Changed, I guess. What?

[Damaris]

Juice Press.

[Rory]

Red. Red Lobster to me is always one that should be like a stable that you always go to Red Lobster. Yeah.

[Julian]

I worked at Red Lobster for a lot of years, so I have, like, a soft spot for them, but probably carabas for me.

[Damaris]

There's just something about mass, the crustaceans and shellfish. It just doesn't seem right to me.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Julian, you have a chain restaurant that you used to go to to when you were younger.

[Damaris]

It wasn't Red Lobster.

[Julian]

Okay, what was it?

[Damaris]

Actually, we didn't really do. It was like a Chinese buffet that I used to love.

[Julian]

Oh, yeah, I love the buffet.

[Rory]

Red Lobster, but the Chinese buffet, unlimited crap.

[Mal]

Way more healthy.

[Damaris]

Oh, it's not about health. It's just about. I just. There's something about, like, mass. Like, it's like going to the Chinese buffet. To me, going to McDonald's and getting a fish filet just sounds gross. Like, what is. It's not even fish.

[Rory]

It's one of America's best, biggest, biggest inventions ever.

[Mal]

I'm not an Applebee's hater. I like Applebee's. I would still. I would still go to Applebee's as kind of like a. Hey, let's go after 10 for 2 for 20.

[Damaris]

You can get cooked at Applebee's.

[Julian]

I'm good for cheap.

[Rory]

Cheap. I used to be a big TGI Fridays guy.

[Julian]

Oh, for sure. Oh, you know what? I have loyalty to TGI Friday's spinach dip. For sure.

[Mal]

Applebee has great spinach dip.

[Damaris]

I. I was gonna say Applebee's speaking.

[Rory]

Fridays is like, the same thing.

[Julian]

Everything.

[Mal]

No, everything about Applebee's today seasoned a little spicier.

[Rory]

Same thing is Applebee's and Fridays kind of like Dominican and Puerto Ricans. It's like, yes.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

It's like sometimes you can't tell the difference.

[Mal]

Yeah. One's your neighborhood bar.

[Rory]

Yeah. But if you say, like, yo, this is Apple, he's like, no, this is Fridays. Oh, my bad, bro. No, no more. No problems here.

[Mal]

But Fridays never, like, hit the city like that. Crazy. Like, there's Applebee's on Jamaica Ave. Like, you could get Applebee's in every burrow. Can you get TGI Fridays outside of just Queens in the Bronx?

[Damaris]

Not really.

[Julian]

There has to be a Fridays in Manhattan somewhere.

[Mal]

Really?

[Rory]

Yeah, for sure.

[Mal]

There probably is.

[Damaris]

I mean, Applebee's done a dollar Long Island.

[Mal]

Oh, there's one right on 34. Oh, yeah, there is one on 34th.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

You're sick if you go to the TGI Fridays on 34th, though.

[Rory]

Why?

[Julian]

It's probably nice in there, man.

[Rory]

I'm still trying to figure out why they got rid of ESPN Zone.

[Damaris]

When I was a kid, I used to love going there.

[Rory]

That was my spot, man.

[Mal]

I told you. I got banned and kicked out of ESPN Zone for life.

[Rory]

I think you. I think I do remember you telling me that.

[Mal]

Yeah, I was act in the one in Baltimore.

[Rory]

You order too much cordon blue, Right?

[Mal]

That. That was definitely. I was watching the PGA Tour.

[Damaris]

Damn, I miss ESPN Zone.

[Mal]

Oh, I was at the ESPN Zone.

[Rory]

I was there for 12 hours ordering Cordon Blues.

[Mal]

That's crazy. At 13. Was I going through a divorce? The.

[Rory]

Yeah, Ordering Caught on Blues all day espn.

[Mal]

Did they serve that There. That's such a random dish to get at espn.

[Rory]

Yo, man. Yeah.

[Mal]

When I was a teenager, when my dad was living in Baltimore, when I would go visit him, he would be working all day. So he would just like, yo. Yeah, he'd throw me.

[Rory]

Your dad is a true. Is it like, he's a man's man. He was living in. You ever been to. Have you ever been to Baltimore before?

[Damaris]

Yes, once.

[Rory]

Yo, your dad lived.

[Damaris]

I wanted out.

[Mal]

Worked. Worked on the docks like a man living in Baltimore.

[Rory]

Wow.

[Mal]

So he'd be working all day. So he would just throw me in the ESPN zone. Like he wasn't gonna get babysitter. Just like.

[Rory]

He said that and walked.

[Mal]

Go run amok in the ESPN zone. So by, like, the third day, I was like, I loved it for the first two days, but then I started to get bored and mischievous.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

So I took a basketball from the third floor and I threw it over, over, like, the railing, and it legitimately landed on a waitress with a thing bad as. And I didn't have, like, the. Where I thought. I, like, throw it and run. I like. I watched to laugh.

[Damaris]

You wanted the memory. You heard that hit the tray.

[Mal]

Oh, it's in my retinas forever. So, yeah, I was. I was like. I was.

[Damaris]

I was Kevin McAllister.

[Mal]

I was caught immediately and banned for life from the ESPN Zone.

[Rory]

Yo, that's hilarious.

[Mal]

And of course, on the way out, when, like, they were telling me, like, you're banned for life, I was like, the New York one, too.

[Rory]

If it's just this one, I'm cool. Like, I can't go to Manhattan. Oh, man, that's up. Yeah, that was one of my favorite spots, though.

[Mal]

I loved ESPN Classic so much.

[Rory]

That was a classic spot, and it.

[Mal]

Was the first place ever that had TVs on the urinals.

[Rory]

Yeah, that was.

[Mal]

It was good times, man.

[Rory]

ESPN Zones. That's a legendary spot in one of Times Square. Legend. Legendary. All right, Julian, what voicemails do we have today? Sir?

[Damaris]

You've got mail relationship problem, of course, but this is sparked by a co worker, so it's a little different here.

[Rory]

Relationship.

[Damaris]

All right, Damaris?

[Rory]

Yeah. Okay.

[Damaris]

Did anyone see that?

[Julian]

Hey, y'all, this is Gina from New York.

[Rory]

Shout out to the Discord.

[Julian]

I shared this on there, but I do want to hear your thoughts. My older coworker gave me flowers after I helped wrap up her chart. Honestly, I don't like flowers. I don't like watching them wither and die. And I was directed by my superior to do the assignment. So I kept forgetting them in the office. And Friday I had too many things to take home, so I asked the front desk ladies if they wanted them. They suggested that I leave them at the desk so everyone could see them. So I left early one day for a doctor's appointment, and the co workers saw them. She got pissed. Even though the reception was like, nah, she did like them. She just wanted to show them off that she was like, yeah, whatever. I'm gonna just take my vase. She ended up throwing out the flowers and keeping the vase. So am I rude for not taking them home? And how do y'all prefer for someone to show appreciation? Thank you.

[Rory]

Love you guys.

[Mal]

I don't prefer them crying at their retirement NFL conference, I'll tell you that much.

[Rory]

Hate.

[Mal]

It was hard. That audio was really bad.

[Julian]

So basically, her co worker. Her co worker bought her some flowers to show appreciation for something she did at work.

[Mal]

Work.

[Julian]

Trying to be the girl.

[Rory]

She was a girl.

[Mal]

Women don't possibly.

[Julian]

Okay, whatever. She bought her flowers trying to scissor. She basically. She was basically saying, hey, I don't really like flowers like that. I don't like watching them wither and die. I'd rather put them up in the office so everyone can see. So she puts the. The flowers up in the office. The coworker got upset about that, that she didn't take them home and threw the flowers out. She's trying to fuck, she said. Basically says, was she rude to do that? And how do you feel about. About how do you like to receive whatever. Love or whatever. What's your love language? How you like to receive appreciation.

[Mal]

I don't think it's rude, per se. She made.

[Rory]

She could have took them home.

[Mal]

Like, hey, these are so beautiful. Let's keep them in the office. Like, I really like them.

[Rory]

No, she could have just took them home and she didn't like them. Throw them out.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

How simple. It's very simple.

[Mal]

But what's wrong?

[Rory]

And throw them out.

[Mal]

Okay. If Julian were to get me flat flowers.

[Rory]

Okay, that's something else. Now. Now we're in a whole nother zone.

[Damaris]

Just platonic clover. Yeah.

[Mal]

Just like, hey, man, loves yesterday's ep.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Here's some flowers still in another zone.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

Yeah, I would think, oh, maybe we should leave them here so everyone could enjoy the flowers. I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

[Julian]

Yeah, but if you really, really like.

[Mal]

The flowers, you wouldn't keep them on my desk. Like, what's wrong with that?

[Julian]

If you really, really like the flowers. You would take the flowers.

[Mal]

Homer, it's tough to take flowers, flowers home.

[Julian]

Is it?

[Damaris]

Is it?

[Mal]

Yes.

[Damaris]

Big ass car.

[Mal]

If you're in.

[Rory]

All right.

[Mal]

Even if you're not in a car, traveling with a vase with water. It's even more difficult in a car.

[Damaris]

Then travel with them. You. You take them wrapped up home and then basin water.

[Mal]

Some people go above and beyond and give you vases with.

[Rory]

Don't. Don't go above and be.

[Damaris]

That's like gifting someone a fish in the tank.

[Rory]

You can't give them a fish outside.

[Damaris]

Of the tank and then they do the rest.

[Mal]

So giving me bag.

[Rory]

Why is this universal for? Yo, yo. You holding a goldfish from the carnival from the county.

[Mal]

That won't make it like that.

[Rory]

Yeah. Now that fish.

[Damaris]

You guys ever own one of those? Yes. What do they call it? We call them the Japanese fighter fish. I sounds racist now, but I went.

[Mal]

To a birthday party when I was really, really young. And one of the party favors was goldfish. And it died on the way home.

[Rory]

My sister.

[Mal]

I was like, sad.

[Rory]

My sister got some goldfish that. I think it was like a. I want to say it was a baby shot shower. And the goldfish were like the centerpieces on the tables.

[Julian]

Yep, I did that somebody.

[Rory]

Right. So. So my nephew wanted them. He took two of them home. Sister had these things. So I somehow ended up fish sitting. Gotta feed fish and like that. Right. My sister, when she moved down. Because she had it when she was living here in New York. When she moved down to Virginia the first time, she changed the water. Like, the fish died. Yeah. And she had him for, like. She had them for like three years. Years when she was living in New York. And then she moved to Virginia. Then she went to clean the tank and change the water. And I guess the water is different in Virginia. Like, they died as soon as she changed the water. Like, they were like. But you. They were like, almost like they were drowning. Dying like that.

[Damaris]

Damn.

[Rory]

Like, almost instantaneous. As soon as she put them in the new water, like, they started, like, freaking out in the tank.

[Mal]

Fish, I think, are the most interesting pets in the world. Because they're not really pets. They're decor. Like any other pet is, like, part of your life. Even ferrets, I feel like, get more love.

[Julian]

Oh, ferrets are a fish.

[Mal]

Might as well just be.

[Rory]

If I go to an art house and they got a ferret, I'm leaving.

[Julian]

I wanted one so bad. My cousin stink.

[Rory]

Two. Two ferrets.

[Mal]

Bonnie and Clyde. My cousin Mike. Two fairs, Bunny and Clyde.

[Damaris]

Any white people?

[Rory]

And cousin Mike, let me. Let me holler at you for a second. Cousin Mike, what you going through over there, man? Two ferrets.

[Mal]

He was 15, Bonnie and Clyde and what he used to do to me, which pissed me off because I would sleep on the floor. Floor. When I was at his house, in his room. And he would take. Because I was terrified of the ferrets. He would take the ferrets and throw them on me when I was sleeping.

[Julian]

Oh, that's like evil.

[Mal]

Oh, no. My cousin was. Mike is. Is evil.

[Damaris]

They're very playful, though, and they're charming.

[Rory]

If you own a ferret, my. You got like, go. Go do something else.

[Mal]

I like otters. They kind of look like the only.

[Julian]

Issue is that they're. Because they're rodents. They stink. That's literally the only issue.

[Damaris]

What is that? Why do. Why do rodents just have, like, that general baseline, like, funk. Funk.

[Julian]

But they're so.

[Rory]

Because they're rodents.

[Julian]

I really. I really, like, looked into buying one.

[Rory]

A ferret.

[Julian]

Yeah. Maybe like six years ago. I really.

[Damaris]

They are cute.

[Mal]

I would. With a ferret, just.

[Rory]

Just buy a small dog.

[Damaris]

It's about the same size as Basil.

[Rory]

Yeah, it's probably a small dash. What is that? Yeah.

[Mal]

I'm mad because I was terrified as a kid of the ferrets, but now I feel like I would get along with a ferret.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Mal]

They had claws, though.

[Rory]

Though, like, terrifying, certain. You just should know. Ferret. Get out of here, man.

[Julian]

They always had him in the Petco.

[Damaris]

A white one's too close to a. A rat.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Too close to the sun, but, yeah.

[Mal]

Either way, I think having fish. Don't call them pets. They're paintings.

[Rory]

They're.

[Mal]

They're. You put on your shelf like, they are decor. They're not pets.

[Julian]

I had to swallow living, breathing things.

[Mal]

People use them as decor.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Okay. What am I supposed to do? Pick it up and pet it? Like there's nothing I can do?

[Mal]

Yeah, just put them back in the ocean. Like, it's like, at least. At least if we're kidnapping cute, cuddly dogs from the wilderness, we at least give them love. Like fish. You can't do anything.

[Julian]

Okay. But they don't.

[Mal]

They're a centerpiece they don't need.

[Rory]

And fishes shouldn't be, like, closed in. They should be able to just, like, swim. Swim as vast as the ocean.

[Julian]

You think a goldfish gonna survive in the ocean?

[Damaris]

For sure.

[Mal]

Well, I mean, I. I would think about that often with Paisley, when I get on, like, my humanitarian thing, I'm like, it's weird that we do this to animals, but I'm like, bayes would be the quickest snack in the wilderness in a heartbeat.

[Rory]

Well, she's not based. That breed is not to be in the wilderness.

[Damaris]

Not even.

[Mal]

That breed doesn't exist.

[Damaris]

Yeah, it's not even a real thing.

[Mal]

It's a. It's an experiment.

[Rory]

It's a hybrid.

[Mal]

Yeah, a Maltese and a poodle.

[Julian]

A lab experiment.

[Mal]

But, like, what were poodles doing before humans were around? Like, did we save the poodle race?

[Rory]

I'm sure we didn't.

[Mal]

There's no way poodles were running rampant in the Amazon. They would be.

[Damaris]

Well, they're French, so they were eating croissants.

[Mal]

We saved them from the Germans.

[Julian]

You know what?

[Damaris]

I.

[Julian]

When I was y'all gonna answer that girl question.

[Rory]

Oh, how.

[Mal]

How do we like a affection or whatever?

[Julian]

How do you like to be your. How do you like to be shown appreciation?

[Damaris]

But what about the.

[Mal]

I like. I like verbal appreciation because it sounds like this is just a co worker thing, so I'm not going to say physical touch, because that'd be weird.

[Damaris]

Damaris touches me all the time, but.

[Mal]

It seems unwanted and mean and weird and not appropriate.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

I would go with words of affirmation.

[Julian]

Okay.

[Mal]

I don't need flowers and you appreciate something.

[Rory]

Touch me. Physical touch from your coworker.

[Mal]

Like, not romantic. It's not a love language.

[Rory]

Cute co workers. Yeah, like, if they. If she's cute. Yeah. She could touch me. I give you consent and touch me. Right. Because that's all you gotta do is give consent. Right.

[Mal]

We're in a workplace.

[Rory]

But if I give you consent to touch me.

[Mal]

So even if all.

[Julian]

In your current workplace, how would you like the rest of us to show you affection?

[Rory]

Oh, in my current workplace.

[Mal]

How would you like rel.

[Julian]

Talking about a job?

[Rory]

I thought you told me, like, an any. Just in. In work workplace.

[Julian]

How do you prefer affection in the workplace?

[Rory]

Just shut the up.

[Mal]

Solid.

[Rory]

I love when people just sh.

[Mal]

1.

[Rory]

Just shut the up.

[Mal]

It seems really productive.

[Rory]

What is it called?

[Mal]

Podcast.

[Damaris]

Podcast.

[Rory]

Shut the up. Don't say nothing to me. Leave me alone. What is it?

[Mal]

We're not going with love languages. This is coworker languages.

[Julian]

Yeah, it's still a. That's still a love language, I guess, in the workplace.

[Rory]

What's up other one?

[Mal]

Quality time with my coworker.

[Julian]

No, you spend quality time with Julian. All the time you spent quality time with me.

[Mal]

Yeah, but that's not my love language with you guys. I just like you guys.

[Rory]

No, that's your love language. That's how you tell.

[Mal]

I spend time with you guys because I like you guys.

[Julian]

Yeah, that point.

[Damaris]

Well, it's like. Like language. They're similar.

[Julian]

Oh, Jesus Christ.

[Rory]

Damn. So, yeah, yeah. Can't talk. Touch me. All right, so you want us to touch you? Well, no, it's, you know, workplace.

[Mal]

So clearly malls is not quality time. We'll go with. We'll knock that one off.

[Damaris]

Oh, yeah.

[Rory]

Words of affirmation.

[Julian]

I like. I like.

[Mal]

You just said shut the up and now you want words of affirmation.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's kind of like, give me words. Give me words of affirmation and then shut the up.

[Damaris]

I like your shoes.

[Rory]

Mall right now. Shut the up.

[Damaris]

See?

[Rory]

See how quick that was?

[Mal]

How did that. How did that go with your love language?

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Is that a mutual exchange?

[Damaris]

Yeah, it didn't feel good.

[Rory]

Are you in a strain? You're in a strenuous relationship. You're an abusive relationship.

[Mal]

Okay, now give him a gift.

[Rory]

That's how you fix it. Here's a Chanel.

[Mal]

I mean, why are all love languages?

[Rory]

Yes. Oh, you can curse a out as long as you take it to Chanel the next day. She don't give a.

[Mal]

Do we have another voicemail?

[Damaris]

Yeah, sure. Let's see.

[Mal]

Hey, y'all, my name is Bana. I'm from Toronto, Canada.

[Rory]

Of that big fan of the podcast.

[Mal]

You guys make my Sunday cleaning days a lot more lit. To get into the reason why I'm calling. I've been in a relationship with the man that I'm with for six years now. It's been a rocky road, but we're finally in a good place. During the time frame, about half of the time, which is like three years, was long distance.

[Rory]

And if you guys have ever been.

[Mal]

In it, you know, it can be hard. But during that time frame, trust was definitely broken. And we're in a good place now.

[Rory]

But every now and then, there are.

[Mal]

Points in the relationship where that lack of trust shows. And I want to know, do you guys think that trust can be rebuilt? I know it's a long winded question, but yeah, I just want to know your take on it and appreciate the advice.

[Rory]

Do we think that trust can be rebuilt in general or in her particular.

[Mal]

Saying, they're in a good place now, but. All right, I'll put it the way she didn't put it. He had been caught cheating Mad times. They've been together for six Years. For three years, he was mad. Other girls, they've gotten into a better place, but there's still signs of mistrust and probably some bad baggage from the things that happened before. I think what she should do is look at herself in the mirror and be like, yo, why are you bringing up old? And leave that man alone.

[Damaris]

Get him some flowers or something and shut the up.

[Mal]

Maybe his feet stop nagging him.

[Rory]

Touch him.

[Julian]

That's Jesus Christ.

[Rory]

I. I mean, you know, we could just be honest. Once that type of trust broken, to.

[Mal]

Touch him is crazy.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Touch him.

[Rory]

Touch him.

[Damaris]

Arbor days next month.

[Rory]

Oh, man. You know what goes down on.

[Mal]

They celebrate that next Canada.

[Rory]

I think when that trust is broken, it's you just holding on to the inevitable. It's not going to work out.

[Mal]

Yeah, it's. It's tough to get over that. I'm not saying there's a world where.

[Rory]

It can't happen and it's long distance.

[Damaris]

Not anymore.

[Mal]

Not anymore.

[Damaris]

It was. But it sounds fractured enough that he did enough damage on the. On the distance front that no matter.

[Rory]

Even if he's right here to s.

[Damaris]

Proof, it's still not good.

[Mal]

Well, let's not be super pes. Pessimistic with distance. I'm sure that may have caused some of the cheating.

[Rory]

No, it gave him room to do what he wanted.

[Damaris]

Get his off.

[Rory]

Yeah. 2,000 miles away, they're now in a.

[Mal]

Place where they are together and. Yeah, maybe you have to put things in perspective. Like where we were for three years was not the most positive situation we could be in, and it led to some shit that we can now fix. Focus on the reason why it may have happened because you guys were long distance. Now you're not long distance. So maybe you can focus on the good right now.

[Damaris]

Based on what she said, it sounds.

[Mal]

Like six years in. I'm not telling her just pack up and leave.

[Rory]

No, she's. No, she's not. You're not telling her that. She would be telling you that I'm.

[Mal]

Not in this relationship. I don't even know this girl.

[Rory]

No, I'm just saying, like in her situation, multiverse, he can't tell her to leave.

[Mal]

No, of course not. I'm saying to her as me that she put six years in and she's saying the last three have been better. She's still just trying to work and get over some of the mistrust. You put the time in already, you might as well see it through. Why. Why waste. Why waste the last three years of trying to make it work to now being in a good situation to still focus on the passion you made it. Just. That's where it gets up with people that stay with people that cheat. You did make it a decision to stay here and try to work on it. So are we going to do that or not? Yeah, I know it's a up situation. That's why when the cheating happens, you should just leave off rip. But when you choose to stay and work on it, that means you are now part of working on this. And working on this means you need to ignore some of the past and focus on what's happening right now.

[Julian]

Yeah. Once you make the decision to. To stay, it's like you're. You're it now. Like, you made that you can't read. You can, Rene, but you can't re. You can't keep. Once you forgive me, you can't bring. Keep bringing up what the I did. Once you decide to forgive me, it's not, oh, but you did this. Oh, but you did that. You decided to forgive me and give me another chance. Are you going to do that or not? What my advice to her would be, everything that's done in the dark will come to the light, just like it did last time. And when I say done in the dark will come to the light, I don't mean when it's dark. Turn the light on on his phone and go through it. That's not what I'm saying. What I'm saying is let naturally come to the surface. Like, if it's meant to come out, it'll come out. But just enjoy your relations relationship in the meantime. You're currently. If he does end up cheating, you put yourself through that trauma twice by worrying about it so much. Wait until it actually happens. Enjoy the happiness that you have that's so rare. And just do your best to like, let it go or leave. If you're not gonna be able to let it go.

[Mal]

And if your. Your current mistrusts are accurate and he is still being a little cheaty, I'm not saying he's probably the same way he was when y'all were not living together. Other, he's never going to change. Six years of other. The seventh year, he's not gonna be like, well, yeah, I'm gonna hang the jersey up now.

[Rory]

You can't detach yourself at this point.

[Damaris]

It's a habit. Whether or not she lives with him or not, he's still used to other women in this relationship.

[Julian]

Yeah, that's a little different.

[Damaris]

I think it's different that they're in the same city. But like I'm saying, three years of building that habit, you're not just gonna be like cold turkey and be like, I guess I'm done now because she moved to my city.

[Rory]

Ever went cold turkey?

[Damaris]

The cheating, just the coke.

[Rory]

Cold turkey.

[Julian]

I still believe you dabbled a little bit, but we'll talk later.

[Damaris]

I'm not. Nope. Why would I lie? I wouldn't lie about that.

[Mal]

Drug addicts do lie.

[Damaris]

Former. I do a lot of shrooms now. It's kind of tight.

[Julian]

Yeah. Sweetie, just. Just enjoy your relationship. If you're happy, just enjoy your relationship.

[Rory]

You're Damaris, sweetie. Just enjoy your patience. For real.

[Julian]

Cause like, I've been there where you sit up there, like, stressing, like, oh, is he doing this? Your girl? If you're gonna do all that, just.

[Damaris]

Leave in my thing is either clean.

[Julian]

The slate or leave.

[Damaris]

He probably is.

[Julian]

He's probably not.

[Damaris]

He's probably getting some head at Applebee's.

[Julian]

Probably. He's probably not.

[Damaris]

ESPN's own Dome Men 10.

[Julian]

Well, from what I know about men, I'm in a room full of men. So please tell me if I'm wrong. Men usually cheat off of convenience.

[Rory]

You're wrong.

[Julian]

It was convenient. It was convenient when he was cheating because you lived all the way over there. And the shorty, he was probably live five minutes away. Now the most convenient lays in the.

[Damaris]

Bed with himg still lives five minutes away.

[Mal]

And on top of that, like, plenty of men have cheated when they had their girl living a convenient next to them. They still.

[Julian]

Yeah, for sure. But that wasn't. Who knows if that was his. If he started off cheating while they were living in the same house or they were living in the same city. That's different. Different. But everybody has the worry of cheating with long distance because people have. People have sex drives and you're far away.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Like it. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's something that you have to think about. Doesn't make it right, but it is a fact. The situation.

[Damaris]

So I have a theory.

[Mal]

I just feel like Toronto's too small to cheat.

[Rory]

Toronto's a great city to cheat in.

[Mal]

I'll tell you that as an outsider.

[Rory]

No, if I live there, it's a lot of options.

[Mal]

So wait, so you're gonna move there with the intentions to get in a relationship to cheat?

[Rory]

No, that's just. That's some insane. Yeah, that's some wild.

[Damaris]

I have a theory from all. I feel like you would be better suited for a Long distance relationship.

[Rory]

Why he would cheat.

[Damaris]

Well, yeah, of course that's implied, but I'm saying I think.

[Rory]

Why y'all just throwing that on my. On my resume like that?

[Damaris]

I think you don't. I think you really value your time alone in your space. And I think you, when necessary, can give someone the quality time that you want to give them them and feel that they deserve. But then when the weekend's over, the week's over, you're like, I still want to be alone on my own time, in my own city.

[Rory]

I'm a loner and a loner's got to be alone.

[Damaris]

So I think that that fits your lifestyle.

[Julian]

But I don't think he should be in a long distance relationship. I think he should just. Which he tends to do. Date women who have a lot going on so that if she's busy and he's busy, maybe I see once or twice a week.

[Mal]

Huh?

[Damaris]

Damn. What?

[Julian]

You see what they put on you? I have hope for you.

[Rory]

No, you don't. Because you was the first one that said so. He could cheat.

[Damaris]

We're in the. We're back in the pods here.

[Rory]

Oh, my bad.

[Mal]

Because we know you wouldn't really be in a relationship. That's why we're in the pod.

[Rory]

Change. Okay, my bad. I didn't.

[Damaris]

So in the pod, you're cheating like crazy.

[Rory]

Okay, got it.

[Mal]

I. I can't really see you being a cheater. Not because of a moral value. Just because you don't go outside.

[Damaris]

True.

[Mal]

I don't think you really go to girls cribs like that. And if you were in a relationship, I don't know if you'd be the one that would like hide your girl stuff for her to come to the cr.

[Rory]

Oh God, no, no, I don't have the bandwidth effort.

[Mal]

Yeah, I just. I don't think you would do that.

[Rory]

I don't. I don't have it. I can't. I can't do that. Those days are like way behind me that you do in your 20s.

[Damaris]

You want hear some dirtbag there? Someone I. I know pretty well.

[Mal]

Someone you know, right?

[Damaris]

Yeah, it's not me, cuz I'm not in a relationship. He's in a serious relationship and he's. He's older too.

[Rory]

Sold out the garden for weeks. His name is Bruce.

[Mal]

Jenner.

[Damaris]

That's a good twist. He. His girl went away on a business trip for like a week and they lived together and he was, you know, getting his cheat off and he had. A girl was coming into town and he Took photos of his. All of his girls in the apartment. Hid it all.

[Mal]

That's that effort.

[Rory]

That's serious.

[Damaris]

How insane is that serial killer?

[Mal]

I'm not judging people that cheap.

[Rory]

I've seen that in every movie where the dude was a serial killer.

[Damaris]

Hit it all, and then obviously before she came home. Home. Put everything back in its place. That's nuts.

[Rory]

Yeah, he. He's gonna kill his girlfriend and clean the whole space and put everything back. He's that type of guy. That's in him.

[Damaris]

He is that methodical, to be honest.

[Mal]

But I mean. But if you're going to kill your girlfriend, you might as well be good at cleaning up.

[Rory]

Yeah, you have to be good at cleaning up. But she want to get away with it.

[Mal]

Is he not gonna clean it up after he kills her? Like, what do you. What do you expect?

[Rory]

Burn the house down.

[Mal]

True.

[Rory]

Whatever the crime scene is at, burn that to the ground.

[Mal]

That's like with fire investigators. I feel like you should.

[Rory]

I've watched enough First 48 to know. Like, if you just bur. They can't. Your DNA is not there no more. Like, it's not.

[Mal]

I don't know if that's entirely true.

[Damaris]

Teeth. Yeah, that's the only thing you really got to worry about. You got to pull the teeth out.

[Julian]

Yeah, but my teeth. My teeth at the crime scene.

[Rory]

I don't care if they find the victim, as long as they don't have my DNA on the victim, I don't give a fuck.

[Mal]

Yeah, but also, I feel like sometimes in house fires, like, the victim won't completely burn you. You may still be able to figure out that they didn't die because of the fire. Like, if you kill your girl and then burn the house down, there's a chance they could find out how she died. Okay. In the.

[Rory]

Y'all missing it. They could find out how she died. They could find out the first blow that she died from. As long as. As long as your DNA is not there.

[Mal]

Yeah, but what happens?

[Rory]

And the murder weapon is not there. You're. You're. No. Probably.

[Mal]

Okay, but what happens. But what happens if they find Maul's Astor Club lighter next to this crime scene? Seen you're in handcuffs.

[Damaris]

There's mad ass club life.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's not mine. Like, they. They handed out 10,000.

[Mal]

It's your crib.

[Rory]

Still not mine. What are you talking about?

[Julian]

So when y'all have other. So when you're casually dating or when you were cheating. Past lives. Past lives. Different, you know? Did you guys hide did you hide your girlfriends or your main girls or whatever stuff when other women will come over?

[Mal]

That's what we were just talking about. That's some in your 20s.

[Damaris]

I never got that. No.

[Julian]

Like nothing. Like not. Not even if it's like most that was ever.

[Rory]

There was maybe like a brush tampons and stuff. Something like that. Like in, in the bathroom. Like.

[Julian]

Let me tell y'all how this was a Jersey too. Let me tell y'all how this nigga yeah. Told me. I went to go get in the shower and there was a Summer's Eve like body wash in the shower.

[Mal]

That's the one that's for vaginas, right?

[Julian]

Yes, this told me it's my sisters.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Your sister is never leaving Summer's Eve body wash in her older brother's shower. She's not doing it.

[Mal]

Why not?

[Julian]

She's not doing it, bro.

[Mal]

I don't.

[Rory]

I mean I got two bathrooms, but my sister has definitely left her in my. In my.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but there's. And then there's that. That's like.

[Julian]

And I'm talking about not older women, right? Because I feel like older women wouldn't give a. An 18 year old girl is not leaving her Summer's Eve body wash in her brother's shower.

[Rory]

No, she coming back.

[Julian]

She's not doing that. No. Hell no. Teenage girls are. Are embarrassed of everything body wise that they have to do, especially from their older brother. They're not doing that, bro. Okay, that's Cap.

[Mal]

I. I feel like if I had said. But that's one of those Axe body spray and Old Spice.

[Julian]

You're a boy. You're a boy. It's some completely different.

[Rory]

Yeah, but that's. But that's one of those lies where you can't prove it and you got to kind of just watch him from that point on.

[Damaris]

That's weird though, cuz you need to.

[Mal]

Prove that it's cuz you could.

[Rory]

Cuz you could easily. You could easily one day the sister. Y'all be around the sister and be like, yo girl, like, I put your some of Z body wash under the cabinet. You know, I took it out the shower, put the cabinet. She like what? I don't use that.

[Julian]

Nah, this nah sister sisters would know better. I really call him cuz he had. You know how girls with short haircuts have really, really small flat iron irons? He tried to say that was his sister too. His sister had a head full of hair. That little ass flat iron was not hers. She did not.

[Mal]

It was a travel size One.

[Julian]

No, not the size of the flat iron. The size of the, like the plates. That's for. Yeah, that's for Halle Berry. Cut. Having like.

[Rory]

Stop lying pixie cut.

[Julian]

Right, Pixie cut. Yeah. You was that girl with that pixie cut.

[Rory]

I love a good pixie now.

[Julian]

And you lying.

[Damaris]

I like pixie sticks. Those were fun back in the day.

[Mal]

Anyways, is your sister ever covered for you?

[Rory]

Absolutely.

[Mal]

Like in a romantic situation.

[Rory]

Absolutely.

[Mal]

Do you have any fun stories? I feel like she will hold it down.

[Rory]

Oh, no, she. She definitely held it down. But now it's getting to the age where she, like, I think she. She thinks that, like, if I'm seeing a girl, I'm only seeing like one girl. She just like assumes that never the case. Which is probably. Which is probably the case. But she, she, she's kind of like at the slip up stage with. It's like she'll say something and it's just like.

[Mal]

Yeah, she's focused on real shit that ain't even her.

[Rory]

Like, what are you talking about? Like, what are you. That's not even the same girl. Like, just shut up. Like, she at that age now where it's like, oh, shit. Like, I just assumed that that was how Rory did. My bad.

[Julian]

Yeah, that's awful.

[Mal]

I thought I did it to Julian this weekend.

[Rory]

That should move though. You do that.

[Julian]

He do that.

[Rory]

What did you say?

[Julian]

It's starting to seem like it's on purpose. I don't know, Ma. What you think?

[Damaris]

No, wait, wait, wait.

[Rory]

I don't remember. I think he just forgets, honestly.

[Mal]

Yeah, no, I 100% forget.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

I thought I. I said it's good to see you again.

[Rory]

See, that's what we gotta.

[Julian]

Yeah, that's what he did to me.

[Rory]

First of all, don't. Don't tell my. It's good to see her again.

[Mal]

But.

[Rory]

But let's start there. Even my boy. And not being polite. Yeah. N All that. Don't tell my girl. Yo, it's good to see you again. No, it's not. It's not good seeing her.

[Mal]

Why is it not.

[Damaris]

Essentially, I'll let Rory get that off. Because she. He was literally on our first date.

[Rory]

Yeah. But yeah.

[Mal]

Talked to her. We had a good conversation. And he told. Julian told me he was bringing that girl to the show with everything y. So I assumed I was safe to say good to see you again.

[Rory]

Valid. All of that is valid, right? Don't tell my girl it's good to see her again.

[Julian]

You're being ridiculous.

[Damaris]

I would never feel away don't tell my girl.

[Rory]

It's good seeing her again.

[Damaris]

Why?

[Rory]

Cuz it's not good to see my girl.

[Damaris]

Why isn't it though? We had a good conversation.

[Julian]

Good to see you again.

[Rory]

When I told Kia that, yo, you got a habit of doing this where.

[Mal]

You just throw drastically different situation. It's totally fine if he says that to K. You got.

[Rory]

No, but hold on. The marriage got this thing where she does that you've done. When I'mma stop letting you say, yo, you've done that. Tell me when I was okay. Cuz I guarantee you ask Kia that She like. But he's never said that to me.

[Mal]

Yeah, matter of fact, Kia actually asked me, like, why doesn't mall talk to me more?

[Rory]

I say hello, give a hug, and that's it. Where it stops with my. In the girls, I don't try to get. Don't pull me into no. Because I can feel when the girls like, yo, so how is London, kid? Get away from me.

[Mal]

Like.

[Rory]

I'm just saying. That's what I would say.

[Damaris]

The love language.

[Rory]

Get away from me. Like, we not even falling into no conversations about will me and Rory be traveling on the road. Yo, whatever he said, there's nothing wrong to tell. No, it's. You're right. But as a friend, sometimes you don't know when you slip slipping up. Because you might have said something like, London was terrible. Right. Innocent.

[Mal]

True. Okay.

[Rory]

And I'd be like, yo, we had a ball in London.

[Mal]

Yeah, okay?

[Rory]

Now already we got conflicting, you know what I'm saying? Points of views in London angle.

[Damaris]

Just the less you speak, the less.

[Mal]

You don't got me on nothing criminal mentality.

[Rory]

When the cops arrest you, the first thing tell you is shut the up. Don't say nothing. If your girl be like, hey, how was London? Yo, I'm sick. Leave me alone. Get away away from me. I'm gonna just throw it into some other.

[Damaris]

I mean, you could probably phrase it better.

[Rory]

Yeah, phrase it better be like, yo, listen, like, I don't know, man. So my life is a whirlwind. I don't even know if my life is a whirlwind. Yeah, my Right. My life is a world.

[Mal]

Don't say whirlwind to my girl.

[Rory]

Yeah, like, my life's a whirlwind. I don't.

[Julian]

I don't remember vocabulary.

[Rory]

I don't remember London. I'm sorry.

[Damaris]

Yeah, these retinas, I don't remember.

[Rory]

Yeah, I don't remember London.

[Mal]

Who did I do that? I did that to You.

[Julian]

Yeah, we don't go talk about it, though, but.

[Mal]

Yeah, I confused two different guys.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Oh, yeah. Okay.

[Rory]

Yeah, we was. We was confused.

[Julian]

No, no, he didn't even confuse the guy. Guy. He was just trying to, like, you know how you try to be friendly, and he put some sauce on some. And it's like, that's. That didn't even happen.

[Rory]

Wrong sauce.

[Julian]

So now it sound like there's another, and there's actually not even another.

[Damaris]

You put mambo sauce on it?

[Mal]

I thought we were bonding.

[Rory]

You and Damaris's boyfriend.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

N. Was this at your song thing?

[Mal]

My song thing? It wasn't my song thing.

[Julian]

We need to talk about it. Your song thing, Cam.

[Damaris]

I was trying to be.

[Mal]

And by the way, we bonded for the rest of the night, he just kept. Kept talking to me.

[Rory]

Yeah, of course he was trying to get information out of you.

[Mal]

And once I realized my up, I held it down. I ain't say.

[Rory]

All right, cool. You ten toes. Yeah. As long as he stood ten toes after the up, it's all good.

[Mal]

Knows I would. I would stay 10 toes with any guy approaching me.

[Damaris]

How do you reverse a up like that, though? How do you let your. How do you let your. Your friend know this?

[Rory]

Shut the up.

[Julian]

The up.

[Rory]

Just shut up.

[Damaris]

You don't, like, reverse like, no, everybody.

[Rory]

Because now you have to cause more damage.

[Julian]

Everybody never happened.

[Rory]

Yeah, just shut up up.

[Mal]

What did I say? I was like, oh, you know, I'm so silly. I was just joking.

[Julian]

No, I didn't. I told you about that.

[Mal]

You know, you got to gay your way out of it. Oh, I'm so silly.

[Julian]

I didn't correct you in the moment. Rory was like, yeah, I remember I met you at the.

[Rory]

See, you didn't.

[Julian]

That wasn't me.

[Rory]

That's correct.

[Damaris]

Throw a memory on him.

[Mal]

Memories don't live.

[Julian]

Like, what are you doing?

[Rory]

That was sick.

[Julian]

Why you talking like you just got off a live show? Why you still talk? You just talked for three hours.

[Rory]

Shut up. Got Damaris jammed up, baby. Did you was jammed up? You was over there fighting for your life that night. I remember that. Trying to walk around, act like she was busy.

[Julian]

I don't think I ever told y'all this. I don't think I ever told y'all this. Then his homie, right? We're drunk. We're all leaving. At the end of the night, his homie sees Mal's sister and is like, yo, she's beautiful. I said, no, no, please. Like, don't, don't, don't kick your fucking.

[Rory]

Heart out your chest.

[Julian]

I said get your boy, bro. Like, he like, no. Like they ma. And I'm like, dog, nah. Like, no. If there's anybody in this room he can't talk to, he can't talk to her. Yeah, like, he cannot the one person in the room, bro, I think my grandma. Here you go talk to her.

[Rory]

Don't talk to m. Yeah, we not playing that game. I don't even play that, please.

[Julian]

And it wasn't even no disrespectful. He was just like, oh, she's so cute and sweet.

[Rory]

It was cool.

[Mal]

I was just conflicted, cuz I was trying to get to that area where like we could call each other brother in law.

[Damaris]

And which would Roy want to be family with? Everybody so bad, bro.

[Rory]

He's the only child. Child. Yeah, it's the only child syndrome.

[Mal]

That's true.

[Rory]

Like, everybody just want to embrace and just like. Hey, hey, where you Are you leaving already? Like, Rory's definitely got you leaving already?

[Mal]

Yeah, I'm having a good time. I'll be that guy. So soon.

[Julian]

Meanwhile, on his way out the door. Five minutes. So soon.

[Damaris]

So soon.

[Rory]

We've been here four hours. So soon. Yo, listen, fam. Got to go home at some point. That's the only child syndrome.

[Damaris]

I want to do another party. Rory's house. I miss doing that.

[Mal]

I miss my house too. Bought this beautiful home and I can't even live there.

[Julian]

I be thinking about that all the time. Like, damn Rory house down the street. It's probably empty. I should go it. I should go break in. Oh, my dad keys I had. I know where the keys are.

[Mal]

Yeah, the.

[Damaris]

Oh, I know the code.

[Julian]

No, there's another door. You don't know.

[Rory]

Rory changed that code by now there.

[Mal]

Sure, sure, I did.

[Damaris]

Change it.

[Mal]

The realtor had that.

[Rory]

Oh, yeah, man.

[Mal]

Yeah, that. I mean, my dad's in there.

[Julian]

He's still there?

[Mal]

Yeah, he's. He's in and out between Florida and back here.

[Julian]

Oh, I'll go visit him.

[Mal]

Yeah, he's dreams.

[Rory]

Your dad just had a birthday, right?

[Damaris]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. My dad turned 73.

[Rory]

Happy birthday to Julian's dad.

[Damaris]

Went to the gym that day and they gave him a free smoothie and he was like, this is all I could ask for.

[Rory]

So that's it.

[Damaris]

73, healthy man at this point.

[Rory]

That's it.

[Damaris]

Losing a lot of peers already. It's kind of sad.

[Julian]

Yeah, he looks in great shape to be his age.

[Damaris]

Yeah, they're. They're good. They did a little dinner Together? I don't know.

[Rory]

Little humping maybe. Yeah.

[Damaris]

He wasn't around. I don't know.

[Rory]

Got a little humping. You gotta give dad a little hump on his birthday.

[Mal]

Yeah. Yeah, I think so.

[Rory]

His birthday.

[Damaris]

You guys keep putting this on.

[Mal]

My parents have sex.

[Rory]

Did your parents have sex?

[Damaris]

You just keep throwing that every time they come up.

[Rory]

I mean.

[Mal]

I mean, you're here.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

You have sibling. I don't think it's that weird.

[Rory]

We see you. You're right there.

[Julian]

We see you a little pre baby.

[Rory]

Who? Julian's a pre come baby.

[Damaris]

Get the out of here. Don't.

[Mal]

Being a pre come baby.

[Rory]

Yo. Being a preum baby. And you like 30 years old. The say that to you.

[Mal]

My dad treats like, yo, this.

[Rory]

This got the wobbly neck. This a preum baby.

[Mal]

So since my dad has been staying at my crib somewhere, he treats me like a preum baby with my request that he just ignores. So he. He fishbowls his guest room. He stays. He stays in.

[Rory]

He leaves the door wide open.

[Mal]

No, he'll close the door and smoke in there.

[Rory]

Okay. And fishbowl.

[Mal]

Yeah, like, he'll literally close the door.

[Damaris]

I call it hot boxing.

[Mal]

Well, all right. He's. But he's old.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mal]

He listens to rock music. It's called a fishbowl.

[Rory]

That's a fishbowl.

[Mal]

That was fine. Now he uses. Because he can't really get up the steps the same way to the roof to go smoke. And it's been the winter time. He goes into my bedroom and open. Opens my balcony.

[Damaris]

That's nice.

[Mal]

No, it's not.

[Rory]

You're not even there.

[Mal]

Because he goes back and forth between the guest room and my room. And I have a child. Like, I'll walk in there and it'll smell like the highest grade weed you'd ever smell in your entire life. And I'm like, dad, you just like, please smoke outside. Like, just go down the steps or go up the steps to the roof. Doesn't listen to me.

[Rory]

Once. Yeah, that's. That. That's not supposed to.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mal]

He doesn't pay the fucking bills.

[Damaris]

He gave birth to you.

[Mal]

No, he didn't. He came.

[Julian]

Yeah, it didn't really take much either.

[Rory]

Sometimes that's all you need to do. Step one is just come.

[Damaris]

He showed up.

[Rory]

There you go.

[Mal]

He showed up to my mom.

[Rory]

Howard Theater, Washington, D.C. newroarimal.com now tickets are available. Tickets are selling. Hope to see you guys there. And we'll be back soon. Enjoy the rest of your week. Be safe, be blessed. I'm that nigga. He's just ginger.

[Mal]

Peace, new warrior now.