Episode 272 | Million Slut March

Summary

Podcast Summary: New Rory & MAL – Episode 272 | Million Slut March

Release Date: May 28, 2024
Hosts: Rory, Mall, Damaris, and Julian
Duration: Approximately 1 hour 57 minutes

---

I. Political Commentary: Trump Rally in the Bronx

The episode opens with a lively discussion about a recent Trump rally held in the Bronx, highlighting the unexpected appearance of local artists Chef G and Sleepy Hollow on stage alongside President Trump.

• Mall: "Shout out to Chef G and Sleepy Hollow. That's a big look for them." [03:00]

The hosts debate the implications of artists supporting Trump, questioning whether such endorsements positively or negatively impact their careers.

• Rory: "Every artist that supported Trump publicly has not helped their career." [10:34]
• Damaris: "All the people that support Trump are not going on Spotify now." [11:18]

They delve into the authenticity of the rally's attendance numbers, expressing skepticism about the reported crowd sizes and permit allowances.

• Rory: "Tomorrow's point. We are inching closer." [06:31]
• Mall: "He showed me a picture, but it's a fake picture." [12:05]

II. Live Show Experience: Meeting Terrace Martin and James Fauntleroy

Transitioning from politics to music, the hosts recount their experiences attending Terrace Martin and James Fauntleroy's performances at the Blue Note in New York City. They share anecdotes from the green room, including interactions with the artists.

• Damaris: "It was incredible... seeing James perform was like some unicorn." [20:23]
• Mall: "How awesome it was to meet Terry Martin and James Fauntleroy." [16:46]

Damaris describes a moment where she impulsively shouted "cocaine 80s" during the show, reflecting on the pressures of meeting idols.

• Damaris: "I lost sleep over yelling 'cocaine 80s' at the show." [25:44]

III. Music Industry Debates: Michael Jackson vs. Prince & Drake's Influence

A substantial portion of the episode is dedicated to debating the musical legacies of Michael Jackson and Prince. The hosts analyze Quincy Jones's influence and the seamless integration of Quincy’s contributions across various artists.

• Rory: "Mike just makes better music, but Prince is a better artist." [36:00]
• Damaris: "Mike's career looks like AI. This shouldn't even be real." [37:03]

The conversation shifts to modern artists, focusing on Drake, Cole, and 21 Savage. They discuss Drake's role in elevating 21 Savage's career and the subsequent beef between Drake and Kendrick Lamar.

• Julian: "Metro took and did what I did, but keep doing it over and over." [56:38]
• Damaris: "What he did for Drake did not help him." [59:15]

IV. Pop Culture Topics: South Park’s Ozempic Episode Featuring Lizzo

The hosts react to a new South Park episode that features Lizzo, discussing her portrayal and the show's take on the obesity drug Ozempic.

• Mall: "I think it's cool that Lizzo is comfortable in her skin." [84:35]
• Rory: "She liked it. The episode is great." [84:38]

They praise Lizzo's positive representation and the balance South Park struck in addressing sensitive topics with humor.

V. Listener Voicemails: Cheating Scenarios

Several voicemails from listeners present hypothetical cheating scenarios, prompting the hosts to offer humorous and exaggerated responses.

• Mall: "So I have one associate who found out he was getting cheated on because... she tagged the boyfriend in a sex video on Instagram." [86:53]
• Rory: "Whole day crash out?" [92:57]

These segments are filled with playful banter and absurd solutions to the presented dilemmas.

VI. General Banter and Humor

Throughout the episode, the hosts engage in lighthearted conversations, touching on personal anecdotes, humorous misunderstandings, and playful teasing of one another.

• Rory: "What's the average dick?" [00:04]
• Mall: "Weed smoking never want to make me want to calculate inches of dick." [00:05]

They also discuss their own social lives, relationships, and amusing incidents, maintaining an entertaining and relatable atmosphere.

• Damaris: "I've got five bodies. That's a wild name to put in your phone." [71:58]
• Mall: "Shout out to Kyrie Irving and the Dallas Mavericks." [108:34]

VII. Conclusion and Promotions

As the episode wraps up, the hosts briefly mention upcoming live shows and merchandise, interspersed with their characteristic humor.

• Mall: "Merch is now available at newroyman.com." [117:11]
• Damaris: "We're going to have a Patreon episode dissecting a Quincy Jones interview." [40:19]

They end the episode with well-wishes for Memorial Day and a reminder to their listeners to stay safe.

• Mall: "Happy Memorial Day. Wherever y'all at." [116:53]

---

Notable Quotes:

• Mall: "Shout out to Chef G and Sleepy Hollow. That's a big look for them." [03:00]
• Rory: "Every artist that supported Trump publicly has not helped their career." [10:34]
• Damaris: "I lost sleep over yelling 'cocaine 80s' at the show." [25:44]
• Rory: "Mike just makes better music, but Prince is a better artist." [36:00]
• Mall: "I think it's cool that Lizzo is comfortable in her skin." [84:35]

---

Conclusion: Episode 272 of New Rory & MAL presents a blend of political commentary, personal anecdotes, music industry debates, and pop culture discussions, all delivered with the hosts' signature humor and candidness. From analyzing the impact of political endorsements on artists to sharing behind-the-scenes moments from live shows, the episode offers a rich and engaging listen for both regular followers and newcomers alike.

Transcript

[Rory]

And started smoking so now I'm getting high but if it was 13 don't.

[Mall]

Blame me though don't do that.

[Rory]

What's the average dick?

[Mall]

Weed smoke ain't never want to make me want to calculate inches of dick I don't even know why you got your phone out right now.

[Rory]

Calculated.

[Mall]

Put your phone away.

[Rory]

Calculated.

[Mall]

Put your phone away.

[Rory]

What's the average length.

[Mall]

Put your phone away. You're asking me crazy right now.

[Damaris]

We're not going to solve for X.

[Mall]

What does he talk about? We smoke a never made a want to multiply dicks like put your calculator away math. Put your calculator away bro New warrior now. Why you love me Still a mystery.

[Julian]

Me and the surgeon got history I.

[Mall]

Changed a lot of girls lives for real. They need a new body. They hitting me. Hey bbi Drizzy. They want a new body. They asked me for the last one. John. He did it for free cause I sent over so many plastic ones for him. But Red, don't even worry about all of that shit. Just keep it natural for him. I swear I got a passion for you I swear I got a traction for you I swear yeah, you think I'm a bachelor girl but I swear you ain't get your masters but I still breaking your back in the master bedroom I swear you sent a pick in them shorts and I had to sing your cash and like I was dead yeah, you the hood of my dream sexy girl you just asked for me and I'm.

[Rory]

Can you recite the pledge of allegiance?

[Damaris]

I pledge allegiance to the flag in the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God in.

[Rory]

I know that word. Him.

[Damaris]

Yeah. With liberty.

[Mall]

With liberty.

[Damaris]

With liberty and justice for whites. I remember.

[Mall]

Yeah. That's what that. That's when the ADHD kicks in. He's like. Ah.

[Rory]

He said invisible.

[Mall]

Invincible.

[Damaris]

I definitely said invisible.

[Mall]

Invisible for most of.

[Damaris]

Most of middle school for sure.

[Mall]

What the hell is indivisible?

[Julian]

That was like divided.

[Mall]

That was some Nazi Germany first grade.

[Damaris]

No one explained that entire poem to me. We just memorized it.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's like propaganda.

[Damaris]

That's like some Catholic church.

[Mall]

We had to do that every day in grade school. Like.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Beginning. That's not that.

[Rory]

That's sick anymore.

[Damaris]

Hand over your heart too.

[Mall]

Kids ain't doing that no more.

[Julian]

I don't even think kids know that now.

[Rory]

They don't even put the flag in the. In the classroom anymore.

[Damaris]

Really.

[Julian]

I mean you give them more. More principles to run a first.

[Rory]

I Was teaching in Chicago.

[Damaris]

Chef G already took his roll out. Mall is cooked.

[Mall]

How am I cooked? I ran. I ran. So these could run, could fly. I took. I. I was taking shells back in 2020. Rory, you were there when the Internet was on me in 2019. In 2020.

[Damaris]

They still are. Thank God.

[Mall]

Now look at us. Look at the Bronx. 30,000 strong, huh? Come on, man.

[Damaris]

Everyone there is either from Westchester or Long Island.

[Mall]

I don't care where they're from.

[Damaris]

And then it was Chef G. They.

[Mall]

Never thought they would see it happen. They never thought they'd see the day. I was so mad we had to work that day. You would have been. I would have been there.

[Damaris]

No, you wouldn't have.

[Mall]

What? Rory, you're crazy if you think I wasn't going out there. I came in and told you that. I said, rory, I'm so mad we got to work today.

[Damaris]

For those that don't know, for some reason, Trump was in the Bronx, who would you have went to that rally with?

[Mall]

Oh, I got. A few of my homeboys went.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

A few of the homies went.

[Damaris]

For what, though? To support or keep the hoses out there.

[Mall]

They supporting Trump.

[Damaris]

You probably thought Chef G said something on that stage too, huh? You thought that was profound.

[Mall]

I just thought it was.

[Damaris]

He rehearsed that in the mirror. Mad times.

[Julian]

Can we just play it a little bit?

[Mall]

Shout out to Chef G. Shout out to Sleepy Hollow. You know what I'm saying? That was a great look for them. Great look.

[Damaris]

All right. What happened to Lil Pump after he. He did this?

[Mall]

Look, no, no, no. Don't try to. Don't try to step on Chef G and Sleepy Hollow with Lil Pump. See, they always try to. Don't do that. Let Chef G and Sleepy Hollow have they moment.

[Damaris]

Oh, I have nothing bad to say about them because I have to live in New York City.

[Mall]

Yeah. Shout out to Chef G and Sleepy Hollow. See, y'all didn't think they would be on stage with Trump. Y'all didn't think they would be at a rally with Trump supporting. You know what I'm saying? I'm just telling you the tides is changing a little bit. That's all I'm saying.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah. No, I feel like Chef G and Sleepy Hollow. Really?

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

When I walk, they're almost like a full moon. The way they move the tides.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Should we play some of this?

[Damaris]

Sure.

[Rory]

I want to hear Trump's rollout. L is rapper Chef G. Does everybody know Chef?

[Damaris]

Where is Chef? Of course everyone knows.

[Mall]

Where's Chef?

[Damaris]

Where Is he?

[Mall]

Where is he?

[Rory]

Where's my African American?

[Mall]

There he is. Up, fellas.

[Damaris]

Rapper Sleepy Hallow.

[Mall]

Sleepy Hallow.

[Damaris]

That should be. If he makes Joe Biden's new nickname, that. This is a good pr.

[Rory]

If Sleepy Hollow doesn't sample that in the song.

[Mall]

Come on.

[Damaris]

He already.

[Rory]

That's his. That's his artist. Are you kidding me?

[Damaris]

I'm sure they have a joint album on Friday.

[Mall]

Absolutely.

[Damaris]

With all Trump interludes.

[Mall]

That's a great look for them, though, man. President Trump.

[Damaris]

Oh, man. One thing.

[Mall]

One thing I want to see.

[Damaris]

Bombing.

[Mall]

I want to say they always gonna whisper your accomplishments.

[Damaris]

Wow.

[Mall]

And shout your failures.

[Damaris]

Right?

[Mall]

Trump gonna shout the wins for all of us.

[Rory]

That's right.

[Damaris]

Doing this and getting no reply is. You guys think I've bombed at our live shows.

[Julian]

Stop.

[Mall]

Y'all hate.

[Damaris]

This is how you bomb.

[Julian]

First of all, the lighting is bad.

[Mall]

Make America great again. Yo, listen, man, I just want to. Listen. I'm on record 2019, you know. Listen, man, I paved the way for the homies to do this. You know what I'm saying? It was me. Those teeth. I want to find out where you did.

[Damaris]

I gotta get my teeth like that.

[Mall]

Dc.

[Damaris]

I want that to happen to me.

[Mall]

I want that to happen to me. You can't drop. This is the sickest ever.

[Damaris]

That's the presidential candidate.

[Rory]

He's gonna win.

[Mall]

He's gonna win.

[Damaris]

Can grills just happen to you?

[Mall]

Yo, I want that to happen to me.

[Rory]

I want that to happen to me.

[Mall]

Yo, man, this is the funniest in the world, man. I want that to happen to me.

[Julian]

I know they're gonna kill us and say that. Y'all, this isn't funny like this. He's really gonna become the president again. You gotta laugh.

[Mall]

Anybody that's mad, them that's always in the comments. You don't know the agenda. You're put. Shut the up and eat my dick. Who gives a. What you talking about, man? Vote for. We vote for Trump. I was on board with you for a while.

[Damaris]

I was about to do the Chef G, but then.

[Mall]

Y'all not voting for Biden. Cut, man, cut it out. There's no way you voting for Biden again. Rory. There's no way.

[Damaris]

Oh, no. I'm. I'm going back to being part of the problem.

[Mall]

I'm not going to vote, okay?

[Rory]

I'm on Rory's side. They both can suck my dick.

[Mall]

You're not voting either.

[Rory]

This is not a. We support Trump.

[Mall]

Oh, man.

[Damaris]

Definitely not.

[Mall]

No vote is a vote. What they told me but when I didn't vote in 29. No vote is a vote for Trump. Fuck it. Welcome to the team, fellas. No vote is a vote for Trump.

[Rory]

Tomorrow's point. We are inching closer.

[Mall]

Yo, I don't know why y'all only fighting it for the comments. Y'all not fighting it for morals and talking about.

[Julian]

Well, I mean, you know, I still.

[Damaris]

Get killed to this day for saying on the podcast, I'm not voting for Trump or Hillary. I still get killed to this day.

[Mall]

But I'm saying, y'all voted for Biden, man.

[Damaris]

I did. Yeah.

[Mall]

Y'all fucked up the country. It's your fault.

[Damaris]

No, because you guys pressured me into voting. You shamed me for not voting when it was Trump and Hillary because I thought both of them were pieces of shit.

[Mall]

I did.

[Damaris]

And I didn't have the same. I didn't have the same energy for Hillary in London.

[Mall]

Let's keep it a buck, either. And I still shamed you. I didn't vote either. And I told Rory he wasn't for nothing. That's the beauty of politics. We can all be on the same side and act like we not.

[Damaris]

And this is how. This is how full of I really am. Because I. I hated on Hillary so much. She walked right past Julian Lyon, London, and we both went, oh, is that a Birkin?

[Rory]

She had a gator. Blue gator skin. Birkin. This was hard.

[Damaris]

I don't keep the same energy at all.

[Mall]

Guess who paid for that burger?

[Rory]

Us.

[Mall]

Exactly.

[Rory]

Right? I want to see it in person. That took it.

[Mall]

You should have snatched it from.

[Rory]

Nah, I would never said, give it back.

[Julian]

And we would have never got Julian back, but I mean.

[Mall]

Give it back, yo.

[Damaris]

Snatching Hillary Clinton's purse in London.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

In front of my, like, my friend.

[Damaris]

Like, that would have been the way to go out.

[Mall]

Yeah. Give it back. It. We pay for it.

[Damaris]

Red Pill. YouTube would love us.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

If I took that.

[Julian]

Might have been our big break.

[Rory]

Me dying.

[Julian]

If he dies, he dies.

[Damaris]

They would throw me in that resort with Ryan Garcia.

[Rory]

Calling that a resort is hilarious.

[Mall]

Listen, man, I just think it's dope that Trump really came to the Bronx, man. That was fire.

[Rory]

I'm happy for you.

[Damaris]

Is that that fire?

[Mall]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Damaris]

All right. Bill Clinton had an office in Harlem.

[Rory]

Still there, still there.

[Damaris]

So close to the people.

[Mall]

Nobody cares about that office.

[Rory]

What do you mean? It's actually beautiful, that office. What are you basing that off of the office?

[Mall]

I just feel like saying the office. I'm the base of those, but it's.

[Rory]

A really nice office.

[Mall]

I don't give a.

[Rory]

And it's a museum. It's like the most. It's a private collection. It's a beautiful.

[Mall]

Clinton belongs in the.

[Rory]

There's a moon rock in there.

[Mall]

There's a. A what?

[Rory]

A rock from the moon.

[Julian]

Isn't that like a type of weed?

[Mall]

A rock from.

[Damaris]

From Area 51 where they shot it.

[Mall]

A rock from the moon.

[Damaris]

That's a Nevada rock.

[Rory]

No, no, you do know. Look, I. With you. I'm full. No, no, no. Cuz Rory, I'll shoot you some with you on the conspiracy. I don't think people have ever been on the moon. I'll die on that hill. But we have sent robotics up to the moon to receive samples. So therefore.

[Mall]

And president. Former president.

[Rory]

So what he would do? What he would do is he. Because I learned a lot when I went to. I've been there a few times. He would put it in the middle of his conference table. And when he was arguing with other world leaders and they were like, going over like, you know, petty shit, he would stop the room and pointed that rock and said, look what we were able to accomplish. Like we can. We can. Whatever we're doing in this room isn't the end all be all week.

[Mall]

Nino Brown did that in New Jackson. He pointed to the rock and said, they came back for the base. You did the same.

[Damaris]

You think he had that moon rock there when he's making decisions on Haiti?

[Mall]

Yo, Robert Town. Robert. Robert Town did that in Media Man. And y'all. Y'all didn't call him a hero. Now Clinton does it. He's appointed to the rock. Look what we. Robert Townsend did the same in Media Man.

[Damaris]

We all. I don't even believe the robots made it to the moon.

[Rory]

No, because there's video footage of that. Like, real footage.

[Mall]

Yeah, Peach can make that tomorrow.

[Damaris]

Yeah, he'll put my face there too.

[Mall]

Yeah, me and Rory could be on the move tomorrow if we leave it up to Peach. What are we talking about here? Nobody went to the fucking moon. But you know who came to the Bronx. That's the second best thing. May not make it to the moon, but Trump made it to the Bronx. That's pretty big, man. That's all I'm saying. Shout out to President Trump. Shout out to Sleepy Hollow and Chef G. That's a big look for them. And no matter how much we joke about it, that is dope for them to be at that campaign, at that. Whatever you want to call it.

[Julian]

They're aware they're being used, and they just don't care.

[Mall]

Oh, we're all being used.

[Damaris]

Why is that a big look for them?

[Julian]

Who's looking?

[Rory]

Trump's never. Every artist you think their streams went up.

[Mall]

Trump is one of the. Trump is one of the most famous faces on the planet. No matter how much.

[Rory]

Okay, but it's negative.

[Mall]

No matter how much. No, it's not. To you, it's negative. But no matter how much.

[Rory]

Every artist that supported Trump publicly has not helped their career. I know Roy mentioned Lil Pump earlier. Where's he been? Chrisette Michelle, we always clown on. Her career ended after she jumped out for Trump. Like, no artist that's come out for Trump has never boosted their career.

[Mall]

Julian, I don't know if you noticed, but every artist has supported Trump before he ran for president.

[Rory]

Different time.

[Mall]

Every one of these niggas have stayed at the Trump Towers.

[Rory]

Different time.

[Mall]

I'm just saying they've all supported.

[Damaris]

I've stayed at the Hilton before. I don't agree with their family. Yeah, we stayed at hotels.

[Mall]

None of this. None of that matters is based on what I'm saying.

[Damaris]

I'm saying I don't think any of their streams went up. All the people that support Trump are not going on Spotify now and going. Well, let me look up this. Sleepy Hollow.

[Rory]

Go from Morgan Wallen to Chef G.

[Mall]

Y'all don't know that. Y'all don't. Yeah.

[Damaris]

Benefited Trump to get eyes from a specific community to watch that he was in the Bronx.

[Mall]

Whether Chef G and Sleepy Hollow was there. He had the eyes of the. Of that specific community already.

[Damaris]

Okay, so what clip have you seen besides. Besides him dancing or that on your timeline?

[Julian]

I don't.

[Mall]

Bro.

[Damaris]

There would be no clip of. He's just in the Bronx.

[Mall]

I'm talking about the people that actually showed up. There was a. There was 30 to 40,000 people in the Bronx, bro, for President Trump. I don't care where you want to say they from. I don't care what part of the city you want to say they came in from. That is a big.

[Rory]

They said he was inflating the crowd.

[Damaris]

You think there was 30,000 people in that part?

[Rory]

They said he inflated the crowd by a lot.

[Mall]

See, that's why I don't fuck with Rory. This. He showed me a picture Monday. No, last Thursday. He showed me a picture which was.

[Damaris]

Which was a fake picture, which I later found out.

[Mall]

Oh, my God. Now it's a fake picture. So how many people was out there?

[Damaris]

Not 30, 000 people.

[Mall]

Okay. All right. It's not hard to get 30, 000 people in the park.

[Rory]

Okay, so contrary to the claim that there's 25, 000 people showed up, the campaign only had a permit for 3, 500 people in the park that it was in. Can hold fewer than 20,000 people.

[Mall]

So you. So. So. Because they pro. You believe that?

[Rory]

Well, yeah, I'm going to go with the permit and the size of the park, of course. You. Yeah, I think that's what they do.

[Mall]

That's why I love this politics shit. He gonna find something to support his part, and I'm gonna say what I want to say. That's the beauty of this shit. You can't prove how many people was out there.

[Damaris]

No, you're right. That looks like 30,000 people right there.

[Rory]

Right there. You're right. My bad. Mileage.

[Mall]

But that's not a fake picture, though. But that's not a. You just showed me. You show.

[Damaris]

It wasn't even the same part.

[Mall]

See, but this is what I'm saying with y'all, y'all. This is literally the people that.

[Rory]

All the time. And they're telling the truth about the crowd size.

[Damaris]

I could tell from the angles. When Chef G went up there, there was a lot of walking room.

[Mall]

The angles. I could tell from the angles. Yo, why y'all mad that Trump had the people come out in the Bronx, man?

[Rory]

He had some people. That's. That's not a small crowd either. I'm just saying there's no reason.

[Damaris]

You are playing politics right now by changing the conversation. We're trying to.

[Mall]

No, I'm not.

[Damaris]

We're saying there's not thousand people.

[Julian]

I just think that is funny that Trump. Do y'all know how much. 30,000 people. Definitely not that, like, 30,000 people is insane.

[Rory]

That's like.

[Damaris]

Oh, that's.

[Rory]

That's the Garden. Okay, okay, Ma, it's fine. Like, listen, listen. 30,000 is a lot. 10,000, also a lot. This.

[Damaris]

They said.

[Mall]

Listen, bro, listen, all I'm saying is. All I'm saying is that's a great look for Chef G and Sleepy Hollow to be on that stage.

[Julian]

Okay?

[Mall]

That's all. And we disagree coming from where they come from, their history, their background, you know, I'm pretty sure those guys never thought they would be on that stage with Trump.

[Damaris]

Never thought they'd be used.

[Rory]

Yeah, they never thought they'd be used on Fox News, but they're being used by their label.

[Mall]

Why not be used by Trump?

[Damaris]

Listen, I think Hillary Clinton used Pusha T. Like, I'm not making this a Republican thing. I think entertainers get used in Sleepy Hollow. And Chef G got used in the Bronx. The Bronx got used.

[Mall]

Yeah, they used your HUD aside. We've been used for worse. It's all good.

[Damaris]

Did he check in with you?

[Mall]

Nah. Trump good. He good in the Bronx. He ain't got to check in.

[Damaris]

I thought no fly Zone.

[Mall]

N. He come to the Bronx. Trump. Trump is good in the Bronx. He come to the Bronx whenever he want. Trump is a New Yorker. He come to New York whenever he want. He ain't got to check in.

[Rory]

He never claims New York.

[Mall]

Who?

[Rory]

Trump?

[Damaris]

Well, I mean, he did up until he became Republican.

[Rory]

I'm saying until. Until he started becoming political. Then he's Mr. Florida, Mr. Man of the People. He's a New Yorker.

[Mall]

He's a New Yorker.

[Rory]

He is. He is. I'm saying he doesn't claim it because it's bad for his image, because it goes against everything that he talks about.

[Damaris]

Trump is from Hillside.

[Mall]

Yo, man, I just can't wait for this election. I think this election is going to be amazing. I can't wait for the debate. We talked about the debate coming out. Is it June? What?

[Damaris]

I don't think that is happening.

[Mall]

Why? Why you don't think it's happening?

[Damaris]

I think the deflection off the drug test thing, that's going to be something. Remember when Floyd and Pacquiao went for, like, five years debating, like, oh, we're going to do this fight. Yeah, they're going to do those moves. Nah, it's always going to be something from one side.

[Mall]

I think the debate is going.

[Rory]

There's two scheduled. June 27th and September 10th. I'm going to be in D.C. for that first one, so that'll be fun.

[Mall]

Are you going?

[Rory]

No, my brother's getting married that weekend.

[Mall]

Oh, great weekend to get married.

[Rory]

Yeah. Honestly, that. The speech is the night before the wedding.

[Mall]

Great time to get married.

[Damaris]

It's a holiday, man. Holiday pod. We just. I can already see Damaris rolling her eyes right now.

[Julian]

Listen, I want to hear about how you were very. I heard you were, like, wiggling in your seat at the Terrace. Martin and James Font. Laroi show.

[Mall]

You just wiggling in your seat. Why?

[Rory]

Rory and I had a mandate.

[Mall]

Yuck.

[Damaris]

It was. Yeah, it was kind of yuck.

[Mall]

It's gross. Y'all two went to go see Jazz together?

[Rory]

Yep.

[Damaris]

Couldn't find. Couldn't find a good babysitter. And clearly we've had some issues, judging by my daughter's broken leg.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

So I brought Julian instead. He was. He was Kia.

[Rory]

Okay, well, all right. That's. Nope. Don't even go that far.

[Mall]

So y'all. So y'all went on a mandate to go see Terrace Martin, and was James. James Fauntleroy?

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

So y'all. Terrence Martin and James Fauntleroy at their Blue Note residency here in New York City. Shout out to the two legends. Uh, Terrace Martin and James Faunler.

[Rory]

I called Damaris afterwards, like, the next day. Not that night, because I ended up going. Rory and I briefly went out after that show to another event. We had a whole little night together. It was very fun.

[Mall]

Oh, so y'all was like. Did y'all, like, hug at the end of the night?

[Damaris]

Well, all right, let's go back to last week. Gay. Last time we record him afterwards, Damaris was giving me a lot of. About going to the Blue Note, James and Terrace, all this, like, oh, what the. You're not going to get all of us in this. And I'm like, you don't even really want to go.

[Julian]

I did want to.

[Damaris]

Then on Saturday, I'm on the phone with her and Julian. I'm like, yo, I'm about to send names like, what's up? You coming? I don't want to go to that shit.

[Julian]

That's not what happened.

[Mall]

Don't do that. Don't do that.

[Damaris]

That's exactly what happened.

[Julian]

No, because they listen to this podcast, and that's disrespectful. That's not what I said. I had to go. We, Me and Julian were supposed to be hosting a party the next day. I said, I cannot go out three days in a row. I can't do that. So go.

[Damaris]

Well, don't guilt trip me. Because, like, I was. I really felt bad leaving this podcast that I.

[Julian]

Before me and Julian got booked to do that party. I did want to go. I planned on going, but I know myself, I'm not going to be able to go out three days in a row. I'm not built like that. But anyway, you ended up taking Julian.

[Rory]

I'm built different.

[Julian]

Yeah, Built like a psychopath.

[Damaris]

So we get there. There's two shows, early and late show.

[Mall]

We get.

[Damaris]

Right at the end of the early show, we go to the green room. First person I see, Terrace Martin, starts saying, your man's scared. Where's he at?

[Rory]

Talking shit.

[Damaris]

Immediately, FaceTime. Your man right now.

[Mall]

Oh, about me? Yeah, he said I was scared.

[Damaris]

Says, you were shook.

[Mall]

Of what? Yo, why Nix?

[Damaris]

Because if. If you look at it right, Yo.

[Mall]

Terrace is the one guy I've been waiting to talk to. He's the one person I've been waiting to talk to.

[Damaris]

In the split of social media perceptions, it was you on the OVO side, and then DJ Head and Terrace on the TDE side. You guys were both the representations. He said, facetime Mall right now. He took my phone first. First Face Maul saw was his. Yeah, Maul put his phone down.

[Rory]

You tried to hang up.

[Damaris]

He was scared.

[Rory]

You tried to hang up.

[Mall]

He lying. No, I didn't. I laughed, I smiled, I said, terris, how are you doing? Good to see you. Good to see you. Yeah.

[Damaris]

Different energy.

[Mall]

Yeah. Like, I got, you know, me. And then I said, yo, you're the one guy. Terris is the one guy that I've been waiting to sit and debate with. He's the one guy. Cause I respect. First of all, I respect his musical knowledge. But then the fact that, you know, he's west coast, you know, it's a little sauce in there. Kendrick is his guy. You know what I mean? So I'm like, okay, this is gonna. This is a. This is a guy that I want to debate with.

[Damaris]

You know?

[Mall]

I mean, I like debating with guys that know what the fuck they're talking about.

[Damaris]

So that was the first night. Last night, on Sunday, I go to the show again, and I text Mall twice. Yo, I'm gonna go to the show again tonight if you want to come. Mall, Yo, I'm gonna stay in the house and just watch the game. Like, I'm a little nervous. I don't even really want to see terrorists like that.

[Mall]

No, it don't. It stopped that. I'm in the. I'm in the. I'm chilling in the crib watching the game. That's where it stops at. I wasn't.

[Damaris]

If you really want to debate like you had, you had a second opportunity last night.

[Mall]

No, he's here, too.

[Damaris]

You're not a Mavs fan like that?

[Mall]

No, I told you, I'm. I'm rooting for Kyrie. So I had to watch that game. But, no, I told Terrence, I said, how long you in town? He said, I'm here to. He said, Tuesday or Wednesday.

[Damaris]

We gonna link him after this.

[Mall]

I said, all right, cool. I said, so we got time to catch up and chop it, man. We got time to catch up and chop it. But shout out to Terris, Martin and James F. How was the show?

[Damaris]

It was incredible. I mean, James rarely does live shows, so, like, that in itself was some unicorn. Even see James perform. But, yeah, it was. It was great. It's interesting.

[Mall]

Were there, like, more. Were there more gay couples in it beside y'all, or was it just, like.

[Rory]

All n. Just Roy.

[Mall]

Okay.

[Damaris]

I. I felt for them, though. I don't know if it was Memorial Day weekend or. Julian. I were just discussing the Blue Note. I guess I've gone for such specific shows. I've never realized that that place, like, is just a tourist attraction. Like, people legitimately will just go there because they see a line and it's blue.

[Rory]

It's a brand name.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

I. I felt for Terrace on the first show I saw because, like, you're performing people that don't even speak English and trying to have, like, a jazz moment and talk about to Pimp Butterfly.

[Mall]

Yeah, yeah. They're like.

[Rory]

They pimp animals out here.

[Damaris]

Like, it. It's rough with certain crowds. Like, I bomb in front of a crowd that likes us.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

I could never imagine just doing it to some people that just showed up.

[Mall]

They don't even know who you are. Yeah, yeah.

[Damaris]

This. It's pretty much the Eminem store in Times Square. Like, it's just people like, oh, I saw this on TripAdvisor. Yeah, let's go.

[Mall]

You'll see it.

[Damaris]

And then terrorists really getting deep about stuff. And I'm like, this person next to us does not even speak English.

[Mall]

Just play the music.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Two moments of praise and then observation. My favorite thing is seeing Rory around, like, people that he idolizes, because he gets extremely uncomfortable and quiet and gets.

[Mall]

Redder than he already.

[Rory]

He just gets, like, kind of just like, shies away. Like, he's just, like. You could tell he's, like, happy to be there. So, like, James is, like, the nicest guy ever, and I think he's amazing. But Rory, like, that's his Kanye.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

So, like, it's a different level.

[Mall]

James follower. Being your Kanye is hilarious.

[Julian]

It is.

[Damaris]

He said that he is.

[Mall]

That's. That's just hilarious.

[Rory]

So it's a different level of praise. So I'm like, where. James is joking. We're. I'm joking. We're all. Everyone's chopping it up, and Roy's, like, just, like, hanging. And then at one point, I'm like. Like, get in the. Like, he was just, like, a happ. Literally watching. And then I took photos of them. And then James goes, yo, I'm so happy to. That song with you. I really. With your. And then Terrace comes in and goes. You know, Rory's, like, one of, like, the dopest producers out right now. And then Rory's face, bro. I don't have it on camera.

[Mall]

Like, I wish Roy do that thing he always does.

[Rory]

I wish I filmed it. I wish I had audio or video.

[Mall]

You know, Rory keep a drum kit in his phone. But, yo, I got these, you know, I got this record if you want to. Like, he's holding James. I got this record if you want.

[Julian]

Yo, Aunt laughing.

[Mall]

That's Rory's bag right there. Rory always got a record for a. A record. Yo, I got this, yo.

[Damaris]

But no, but to what Julian is saying. When I'm around people that, like, I revere, like, you would not believe. Yeah, I was actually the fly on the wall. I was too scared to.

[Rory]

He was the quietest person in the room. Like, I was like, I've met that, but I don't know them like that. Rory obviously has a close relationship. Like, I was the one far more social. Roy was just, like, hanging. Just, like, chilling. It was like. It was really so.

[Mall]

He was really being a fly on a woman.

[Rory]

He was really wholesome.

[Damaris]

I mean, Terrace, I'll argue and yell at all day because that's like my man's. But around James, that was like our first time kicking it.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

And I'm in his green room before a show. Like, he got in ears seeing, like, when he's supposed to be cued. Like, yeah, I'm just happy. Just happy to be here.

[Mall]

Just shut. Just shutting the up. Yeah, shutting the fuck.

[Julian]

Sometimes I was very. When Julian called me and told me that I was very happy for you on a friend level that you got to experience that.

[Damaris]

Yeah, it was.

[Mall]

It was cool.

[Rory]

It was cool to watch and to be a part of that was. That green room is so much fun. Those guys are great.

[Mall]

See, now you know how. Now you know how it feels to meet people that you idolize.

[Julian]

You ain't tell him you changed my life, though, did you?

[Damaris]

No.

[Julian]

Okay. You didn't deny us. How the am I supposed to know you wouldn't do it to him? So he changed your life more than Nas did.

[Damaris]

I was with Terrace when that happened. Yo, I was in a session with Terrace, and it was like, yo, you down the hall, Come here. Oh, hey, Nas.

[Mall]

I ain't gonna lie. I would have definitely told James. Yo, that cocaine 80s album that summer, you were the soundtrack to a lot of wow.

[Rory]

Rory gave it a shout out during the show. Well, I forgot the break in. In the moment from the. The crowd. I think it was when Terrace was making his introduction before James came out. And Rory Just like, shouted like cocaine 80s.

[Damaris]

I lost sleep.

[Rory]

It was so funny.

[Mall]

You lost sleep because of yelled cocaine 80s.

[Damaris]

All right, so in a room full.

[Rory]

Of people, no idea.

[Damaris]

Somebody was like, that gentleman needs react quiet right now. Because I actually didn't even realize the perception. I'm happy you're telling me how I looked in that green room, but I suppressed so much talking in that green room.

[Mall]

It was killing you. Your toes was like this in your sneakers. You would just jump in the comments when I.

[Damaris]

When I. When I yelled cocaine 80s. It was like an outer body experience where I said to myself in my head, rory, did you just say that?

[Mall]

Yo, yo, James triggers your. Your Tourette's.

[Damaris]

No life life does that also.

[Mall]

We had, like, cocaine 80s.

[Damaris]

He was describing things that he had done because admittedly, even Tara said that he fucked up that specific show's introduction to James, like, didn't give his full resume. So James was just talking his shit. And then I just. I don't know, something just came over me.

[Mall]

Just yelled cocaine.

[Damaris]

Anywhere but here. Fly ass Pisces do the James joint.

[Mall]

See, now I'm glad the marriage. We got to be glad we didn't go. See, this the type of. I'm glad I didn't go. Now I'm glad I didn't go.

[Damaris]

The way you give me, rightfully so is my friend with certain rooms. This was like the coolest I've ever looked in my entire life outside of my Tourette's of yelling cocaine.

[Rory]

He did not. In the green room, Roy was chilling.

[Mall]

All right, cool, man.

[Damaris]

But trust me, in my head, I. I wanted to play that. That splice cut that. I just. Yeah, I just chopped these drums.

[Mall]

I got this.

[Rory]

Roy just takes James's in ear out and puts an airpod in. It's like, yo, can you listen to the. Listen to the sample real quick.

[Damaris]

Yo, when James said to me how much he liked don't go in my head. This is a true fucking fact. I almost want to be like, damn, you heard that?

[Mall]

The record. He did. Damn, you heard that?

[Damaris]

Yo, it was just so weird hearing him talk about the record. Like, yeah, it's hard to explain. And I'm having an off day today because I'm exhausted, but I don't have very, very much words for a podcast today.

[Mall]

But you were flustered.

[Damaris]

I was very much flustered. Like, damn. And then when Tara said that about the production, I was just like, all right, I'm just gonna stand here.

[Mall]

And yeah, it like.

[Rory]

Roy turned to me, he goes, you hear that?

[Julian]

Did you, like, go home and, like, tell Kia, like, damn everything.

[Damaris]

No, I. No, I lost sleep over y cocaine 80s at the show I went to.

[Mall]

That's a nasty.

[Damaris]

Me and Ant went to the next night, and I almost didn't even want to go into the green room because I was in my head of, like, did I up his show by yelling cocaine 80s. Like that?

[Mall]

Cocaine 80s? Why. Why do you just yell at.

[Damaris]

I don't know.

[Mall]

It's all good, man. That's. That's a guy that you. Look.

[Julian]

You were being a fan. That happened.

[Mall]

Super talented. I understand, man. Sometimes you just have you fortunate enough to be around people that you have this certain, you know, level of respect for, for their artistry, and you just yell, cocaine AIDS it.

[Damaris]

I was clapping like a proud mother at that show.

[Mall]

Yeah, as you should, man. I like that. See, it's okay for men to admit that they, you know, like, people and idolize certain artists. Like, it's okay.

[Damaris]

It might have been the first time I've ever done, like, a call and repeat at a show. Like the way we used to joke about, like, you know, we're not putting our hands up. We're not, you know, doing the call and respond.

[Mall]

Oh, no, you.

[Damaris]

I think every time James said for the crowd to do something, I did it.

[Mall]

That's nasty.

[Julian]

Nasty.

[Mall]

That is so you better be glad you didn't go with a female. You would. You better be so. A woman would have lost so much respect for you that night.

[Damaris]

Like, ew.

[Mall]

Like, what are you doing? Like, you raising your hands. When the guy say, said, put your.

[Julian]

Hands up, they said, make some noise. Where he said, woo.

[Damaris]

Highest octave. I could hit.

[Mall]

Oh, my God, that's disgusting.

[Rory]

And then we went out after we linked with the Boss. Momo was DJing. We had a night. We had, like, a night. It's boss's birthday.

[Mall]

Today's boss's bir. Birthday.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Happy birthday, boss.

[Rory]

Happy birthday.

[Damaris]

We didn't really have a night. Like, we drove up to the club.

[Rory]

Yeah, you. You left pretty early.

[Damaris]

Julian took me down some, like, dungeon, went around an apartment building, down to the A train, then back up, and we ended up in a club.

[Mall]

Okay.

[Damaris]

And I said, what's up to boss? And then grab Julian. I said, I'm leaving.

[Rory]

It was a silencio on 57th.

[Mall]

Oh, silence. Nice spot.

[Rory]

Yeah. It's a good time.

[Mall]

Yeah. Happy birthday, boss man. Good, dude.

[Damaris]

Well, yeah. I wish I could offer more to this conversation, but.

[Mall]

No, man, I was.

[Damaris]

I was a lost, lost of words for.

[Mall]

For most of I'm glad you went and got to experience one of the guys that you really look up to in this music business and see him perform. That was dope.

[Damaris]

Yeah. And I would have been way too terrified to be like, hey, you want to hear this?

[Julian]

Because you actually respect his music opinion. That's why.

[Damaris]

But that's fucked up to say because, like, I idolize track masters, but I'm cool in a room with. With them to, like, give opinions. Yo, listen to this. Whatever James I'm terrified of.

[Rory]

I'm actually this guy. You could not be, like, a less intimidating person. I feel like he's probably easy to work with collaboratively. Like, I. Right.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Julian]

But if he held something up to James and like, James is like, ah, yeah, I see what you did there. Rory might quit music it.

[Mall]

I see what you did there. It's hilarious. What did I do, James? What did I do right there? Tell me.

[Damaris]

What was even more embarrassing was I posted a clip of the show on my IG story and Adam, and he reposted it and then replied to the video in my dms. And I scrolled up to all the blue. I was like, God, I hope he doesn't scroll up.

[Mall]

Oh, no. He scrolled.

[Julian]

Oh, no.

[Damaris]

He saw that it was all stuff for Phone can die, but it's just, like, already how I felt. And then when he DM me back off that, I was like, I hope he doesn't scroll up and see.

[Mall]

Oh, no, he's the.

[Damaris]

The 15 bounces I sent with no reply.

[Mall]

He definitely saw it.

[Julian]

It has been officially one year since the drop of. I thought it'd be different.

[Mall]

Congrats. How you feeling? One years old. Well, you have a one. You have a one and a half year old. Yeah, but you have a one year.

[Rory]

Old album time that perfectly.

[Damaris]

This is what I posted.

[Mall]

That perfectly is hilarious.

[Damaris]

This is what I posted to my close friends while we were in the green room. The only thing I thought was cool about the year anniversary is that no homo. I got to spend it with James.

[Mall]

That was very homo.

[Rory]

No homo doesn't work on that one for some reason.

[Mall]

Yeah, that was very.

[Damaris]

It was the only thing I was like, oh, all right. Maybe this is like, cool year. I put the worst close friends, like, year anniversary, year old today. It represents so much chaos in my life. Fuck this album. But it's incredible. Couldn't be more grateful.

[Mall]

That's very you. That's a. That's a definitely a you caption. Now this is going to make this thing really gay. Like this is a 360 deal gay? Is James in your close friends?

[Damaris]

No.

[Mall]

Okay. That would have been very gay.

[Julian]

That would have been disgusting.

[Damaris]

I don't even think he follows me back. Why would I put him in my close friends?

[Julian]

Yo, that makes it even funnier.

[Damaris]

Answer my close friends.

[Mall]

That makes it very gay.

[Damaris]

You know what's so fucked up? I'm so glad. I'm so mad. I'm just off today because I was so cool over the weekend. Now this entire thing just makes me seem like you're the weirdest human being.

[Mall]

Because now he's realized he's playing back every moment in his head.

[Damaris]

Now, James not going to listen to this, but if in the event that he does, he's gonna look at me like the biggest weirdo ever, like, all right, so that's what that guy was thinking while he was cool in the green room.

[Mall]

Yeah, exactly. It's okay, man. I don't. We get so, like. Men get so, like, weird when it's like. Like that. Like, women, they just lean into it. Just lean into it. You're a fan. It's okay. It's okay to be a fan of somebody. I think men have a hard time, like, accepting that it's okay to be a fan of someone, especially somebody that's really talented. That's dope. Oh, no.

[Damaris]

I'm always on the side of when I'm a fan.

[Mall]

Yeah, that's. There's nothing wrong with that.

[Julian]

He a fan. He a fan. He a fan. See, that's what they Freaky ass. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

[Mall]

That's what they. That's what they do to make you, like, feel insecure about yourself.

[Damaris]

You think I'm a 69 God for James.

[Rory]

All right.

[Julian]

See, you made it.

[Rory]

Because I don't like this because I was there, and I feel like this is, like, a throuple thing that's going on.

[Mall]

Yeah, no, I usually. You was part of it. Part of it, too. He's part of the weird.

[Rory]

I didn't sign up.

[Julian]

Well, I'm happy. I'm happy that you guys have fun.

[Rory]

I had a blast.

[Julian]

And to our listeners that signed up to our party, I'm sorry that we didn't have it.

[Rory]

It.

[Damaris]

I'm trying to remember Julian Swag. I was still in my head that we were laughing. I didn't even really peep, like, how Julian was.

[Rory]

Nah, back me up.

[Mall]

Julian waved to me on FaceTime. I almost hung up the phone.

[Julian]

And it was probably a. I was.

[Rory]

The funniest guy in the Room like, hi, mall.

[Mall]

I was like, yo, listen, man, the game is on. I'm about to hang up, though. Don't say hi to me.

[Rory]

No, you were hanging. Terrace was cutting you up.

[Mall]

No, that's my guy, man. I do want to have a real talk with Terrace. I had a. I had an interesting talk with Omar episode with a week and two over the phone.

[Rory]

Look who you talk to.

[Mall]

That's my guy.

[Damaris]

I mean, he's a. A listener of this podcast.

[Mall]

That's my guy.

[Rory]

I know.

[Mall]

Shout out. He is shout out to Omar. He's married. Been married for years.

[Julian]

Sorry.

[Mall]

He's been married for years. One of my first.

[Julian]

He was one of my first crushes.

[Mall]

He's also been married since he was your first crush. You don't add a Steelers coach. Yeah, yeah, but shout out to. Shout out to Omar, the Steelers coach.

[Julian]

It's a joke. It's a joke.

[Mall]

This actually, this would be.

[Damaris]

You have a weird crush on Mike Tomlin, Tom.

[Mall]

Well, because he probably resembles Omar Epps.

[Damaris]

Oh, yeah, I guess.

[Julian]

Yeah, that was the joke. Yeah, I missed it, but whatever, Go ahead.

[Mall]

But since we have Ant in the room. Me and Omar Epps. Omar, he hit me and he said, yo, listen, man, quick question. I don't want you to, like, give me a knee jerk reaction. Just think about it. Is off the Wall a better album than Thriller?

[Julian]

Yes.

[Mall]

And I said, I don't know. But after listening, because I went and I listened to off the Wall and I listened to Thriller and I hit him back and I said, I think I know why you feel like off the Wall is better. Off the Wall has more of that R and B vibe that we naturally like. Thriller was more of a pop. It was some R and B in there, but that was more of a pop album than off the Wall. Was off the Wall was Mike really digging into his R and B, all the way. R and B. Traditional R and B bag. But then he started, like, comparing songs, and I'm like, it's crazy that these songs are from the same artist that we're comparing in this text right now. Like, Mike is the illest dude ever, bro. Like, it's not even close. When you start comparing his records to his records, it's like, how does an artist make this much great music? And that. That was like, what, a three year span? Maybe?

[Julian]

Yeah, Thriller is better than off the Wall, but not by much.

[Damaris]

I prefer off the Wall, but I mean, Thriller is. If we're going off, like, the apple music conversation that we had, it's the greatest Album, period. But I prefer off the Wall. I prefer Bad over Thriller. But.

[Rory]

Yeah, Thriller is like a greatest hits collection. Like, there's not a miss. It's off the. Not to say that there's a throw in off the Wall, but Thriller is just like.

[Damaris]

It's like that in the Bob Marley Legend album.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

It's like, all right, everything is a.

[Rory]

Is it like, All Diamond Records.

[Julian]

Bad would probably be my favorite Michael Jackson album. If I had to pick a favorite.

[Damaris]

That is definitely my favorite. But I would go off the Wall Second and Thrill the third is my personal preference. And then wherever. The Free Willy. That's over there.

[Rory]

That's over there. Yeah.

[Mall]

How you gonna just wave off the Free Willy like that? Like. Yeah, that's crazy.

[Damaris]

And then what was. What was the album that had butterflies on it?

[Mall]

That was Dangerous. Invincible.

[Damaris]

Invincible.

[Mall]

Damn.

[Julian]

Wait. Dangerous might hold on. Cause Bad, my favorite Michael Jackson songs are Liberian Girl and Dirty Diana, which is why I like Bad so much. But Dangerous might be the one.

[Mall]

Dangerous was a crazy album.

[Rory]

Mike has some. Jesus Christ. These albums are so concise.

[Damaris]

And as much as I lean on the print side for that debate, once you start looking at everything on Wikipedia, like, just looking at the track list, it's like.

[Mall]

That's what I'm saying.

[Damaris]

It's like, I missed.

[Mall]

That's why I'm.

[Julian]

To me, all you fake musicians with the old Prince was. Yes. Prince might have been more talented. Prince did not have better music than Michael Jackson. We got to stop.

[Rory]

Yeah. I don't think anyone would argue Prince is a more talented artist. Musician.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

That's not even up for debate. I don't see how that's an argument. Mike just makes better music. But Prince is a better artist.

[Mall]

Yeah. I mean, when you play that many instruments.

[Rory]

Yeah. It's not fair to compare.

[Mall]

It's like, that's like, come on.

[Damaris]

Mike's career looks like AI. Like, this shouldn't even be. This shouldn't even be real. Like, how do you have this perfect of a discography?

[Rory]

It's actually crazy to look at.

[Mall]

It's sick. Yes.

[Damaris]

And listen, I love Diamonds and Pearls. I love all that. Prince is my guy. But when you really look at this, this isn't even human that you could have every three albums. Everything's it.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Like legendary classic hits.

[Mall]

Like, the undeniable hit record. Like, not the one that you can sit here and debate. It's like, bro, it's not even. These are all hit records. Like, it's crazy.

[Damaris]

And, you know, I'm. I'M big beehive. And I always say the next person to Mike would be Beyonce can't sit.

[Julian]

She can't sit.

[Damaris]

Musically, when you sit and look at this, it's like, listen, yo, four is a classic. But I should.

[Mall]

Nobody.

[Julian]

Nobody can sit musically with Mike.

[Mall]

No, M. Michael Jackson is on a entirely different scale than any of these artists. But it's just fun to go back now and, you know, listen to the albums and the music and kind of just like, compare it to what's going on.

[Damaris]

Okay, the real, real question here, since we got all my homoerotic out with the James thing, how did you and Omar Epps on the phone end up in this conversation? Yeah, because that's way gayer than me sitting in a green room with James.

[Mall]

Wow.

[Damaris]

How did you and Omar just start talking about that? Sounds romantic.

[Mall]

Does it? It's Michael Jackson. Who doesn't. Who doesn't listen to Michael Jackson?

[Damaris]

But how do y'all even get on that debate?

[Mall]

It may have been a conversation.

[Damaris]

Oh, walk me through. Hey.

[Mall]

It was coming off of the conversation that we had a few days ago about the whole Drake and Kendrick.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mall]

So I guess just in the midst of us coming out of that conversation, it just turned into a music thing. And he probably was just home thinking about it, and he just texted me and asked me, and I thought it was a. It was a good question because at first I was like, come on Thriller, without a doubt. But then when you sitting and you look, I said, you go to off the wall and you look at it. You like, wait, hold up. This ain't. Yeah, it's like. It's like, this is almost the same shit. Just obviously Michael, during Thriller just changed music videos. Just. He just became the biggest artist in the world at the Thriller album. But just the music, just everything aside off the wall is right there.

[Damaris]

Ironically, I texted Julian and Damaris over the weekend for a Patreon topic. I want to dissect that Quincy Jones interview. It's six years old now. I reread it while I was waiting for my computer at Apple. We're going to dedicate a whole Patreon episode to dissecting that. That's the wildest. It's the wildest interview I've ever read in my life.

[Mall]

Quincy Jones is like. When you. When you. When you. If you didn't watch his documentary, I don't know how you didn't watch yet, but definitely watch Quincy Jones documentary on Netflix for somebody to have. It's almost like you can't believe the Type of shit that Quincy Jones has lived, done, seen, been a part of. Like, he casually talks about Frank Sinatra. Like, just throws his name out. Yeah, me and Frank, you know, this is how we did it. And we just shook hands and we. I'm like, wait, what? Like, how do you just throw those type of people? Miles Davis and Sammy Davis. And I'm just like, what the Michael Jackson? He's like, yeah, I remember little Michael came in. A little Michael, little Mike came in and just. I'm like, yo, who is this guy?

[Damaris]

The guy from Vulture that interviewed him out the gate, first question, like, little fluff, whatever. I mean, you've seen a lot. He said, yeah, I've seen too much. I wish I didn't see it. He said, like, what? He said, I know who killed jfk. That's how the interview starts.

[Mall]

And I believe him. How about that? I believe Quincy Jones when he says it.

[Damaris]

Oh, no. He says the name, I believe him.

[Mall]

I believe him. That's the type of life the legend, the fucking icon, idol Quincy Jones has lived, done been a part of. Quincy Jones is like the guy in the movie that's in every scene, but you don't notice it until they point it out. It's like, yo, look, there he goes right there. It's like, wait, he was in the room when that happened? Yes. Like, he's just.

[Rory]

This reminded me of Einstein, Einstein and Oppenheimer. He just kept popping out of nowhere.

[Mall]

Yeah, that's how. That's. That's Quincy Jones.

[Rory]

He's everywhere in that movie.

[Mall]

He's everywhere. He's had a hand in everything he's been a part of. If you have some of your biggest, most favorite songs, record artists ever, I guarantee you somewhere in there, Quincy Jones thumbprint is there on that artist.

[Damaris]

So was his birthday over the weekend? Did he turn 91? Because how I even got on this entire thing was my pop saying, so Quincy Jones is 91? No, that would be such a bucket list interview. My pops be doing what?

[Mall]

He's all right.

[Damaris]

So I don't even know where my pops. Out of nowhere.

[Mall]

He had a couple bruises.

[Damaris]

He was high.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

He was saying, bucket list interview. And I. I replied, his family isn't letting him next to a microphone. After that last interview, he said, richard Pryor, fuck Marvin Gaye. The last time someone put a microphone.

[Rory]

He just said, richard Pryor and Marlon Brando used to fuck each other.

[Damaris]

That's what it was.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

So that made me.

[Rory]

This is.

[Damaris]

Yeah, that made me read that interview again while I was at Apple to send in my pops. And I sent it to them like Patreon episode. We're breaking down that entire interview next Patreon. I could talk for six hours right now if we really wanted. What he said in that last.

[Rory]

This is his quote. Brando used to go cha cha dancing with us, which is just a hilarious sentence. Out the gate, they said he could dance his ass off. He was the most charming you'd ever met. He'd anything. He'd a mailbox. James Baldwin, Richard Pryor, Marvin Gaye. Look at the names that he just threw out there.

[Mall]

That's sick. Running off them names. Like after mailbox legend. He'd a mailbox. James Baldwin.

[Rory]

James Baldwin after a mailbox.

[Damaris]

Yeah. I felt bad for on Julian last episode because I sent this quote to my dad. What were your first impression of the Beatles Is what Vulture asked Quincy Jones.

[Rory]

That's right. On them.

[Damaris]

That they were the worst musicians in the world.

[Rory]

Thank you.

[Damaris]

They were no playing. Paul was the worst bass player I've ever heard. And Ringo. Don't even get me started. Yo, Quincy, you know what it is to cope.

[Rory]

That's right.

[Mall]

He's at that. He's at that point now where it's just like, yo, listen, man, I'm getting all my. Yeah, I'm getting all my. Off it.

[Damaris]

He was back to the mic, though. He was saying Mike stole a whole lot of.

[Mall]

He did.

[Rory]

So what?

[Julian]

I don't give a rat's ass.

[Rory]

Yeah, it gives a. All these guys still.

[Damaris]

I want to leave Drake alone, man.

[Rory]

I. We don't care either. Steal Drake. Keep doing your thing.

[Damaris]

Quentin didn't get the publishing he deserved. And Quincy went a whole list of names that never even got a point on a Michael Jackson record that he stole full records from.

[Mall]

Gotta love Quincy Jones. Living legend, man. Shout out to Quincy Jones. So we got some new music over the weekend.

[Rory]

Your guy responded?

[Mall]

My guy responded, yeah. Who's my guy? Drake.

[Rory]

What do you respond with Kendrick? Yeah, of course.

[Damaris]

Another embarrassing moment. I just had embarrassing moments over the weekend when this Sexy Red album dropped. I text Damaris at 3am 3am yo, you up? She hit me the next morning, like, yo, is everything okay? I was like, nah. I was listening to Sexy Red album. Just want to talk to you about it. I was jamming at 3am by myself.

[Rory]

You actually listen to the album?

[Julian]

Do you still think the clock is off? Clock is on.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Still think the clock.

[Rory]

I listen to two of the records that didn't have Drake on them and they were hard to listen.

[Julian]

To that outside record. Oh, my God, that with Mike. Will made it. That goes crazy.

[Damaris]

It's a good record.

[Julian]

The one she moaning on. Oh, that is gonna go off. It goes crazy.

[Mall]

You see, I can't.

[Damaris]

She might ruin the youth, but it's catchy.

[Mall]

I can't. I. I can't bring myself to listen to it, though. I just can't. Like, I can't. I can't press play on this.

[Damaris]

I mean, you're already in a Republican. But all the way through it, I started feeling more and more like a Republican and like, we need to get back to the nuclear family. She was stunned about having the songs for the With Five Baby Daddies. I was like, this is an awful message, but it sounds amazing.

[Julian]

Eat my. On my period Blood dripping down your.

[Mall]

Face I said, all right now, sexy. Hold on. See, see, we gotta relax. That's not she.

[Julian]

Wow.

[Rory]

That's your guy's girl, though.

[Mall]

Okay. What does that mean?

[Rory]

It's two bad.

[Damaris]

You know, I also texted Mall at midnight when this came out and said, what is Drake doing? Which he did not reply to.

[Mall]

I didn't know what you was talking about. I read that the next day, and I was like, what the is Rory talking about? I thought Drake did some wild.

[Julian]

I'm here to stand up for Drake because what if. If you're a strategist, what strategy do you tell him to go is he's in the same boat, kind of as. Mall's not gonna like this, but as Cole, when it comes to Everybody's waiting for what you're gonna say next. And you can't come with the braggadocious shit because the general consensus is that you lost. So you have to come with this. Like, what did y'all want him to do?

[Damaris]

I'm not.

[Mall]

All right.

[Damaris]

I'm not mad at him leaning into it, but he has to go full villain at this point. Like, he has to keep this energy up with the BBL shit, with objectifying women. Like, everything Kendrick said and Meet the Grams, he confirmed in this verse, which is fine. But he's got to live there now.

[Rory]

Yeah, but he's been living there.

[Julian]

That's his life.

[Rory]

Yeah, it's his life.

[Mall]

He's got three condos there.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but things are different now. Let's. Let's not act like people aren't looking at Drake differently for the first time ever.

[Rory]

Second.

[Damaris]

It was fine living in that world before we got to think before. Before euphoria and after A, D, B, C. We have to figure life with Drake is like that so? Yeah, if you're gonna lean into this, I'm with it. Listen, it's. It's a cool verse. Whatever. I get it, but you gotta kind of, like, be the villain for real now.

[Mall]

I think that he will lean into more of a. A villain type of energy moving forward. But I think for this record with Sexy Red, I mean, this is just a fun, fun record. This is not about, you know, any of that. I do like the. The whole playoff. The whole BBL jersey thing. I thought that was. Was cool. It was smart. Lean into that. Was it making your own? Yeah, why not? Especially if it's on a record with somebody like Sexy Red. Yeah, why not?

[Damaris]

I felt like if he was gonna rap over that, make that the next diss record. Like, nah, don't even touch that. Like, you add into it even more, man.

[Mall]

You gotta have fun with that. He ain't. You're not mad at that? That, to me, it's showing that. Okay, I'm gonna take that. Like, cool. That's what you trying to. All right, let me take that. Making my own flip and have fun with it. Like, it's not more so about. Oh, this is still a part of the whole energy from the beef. Like, no, this isn't that. This is like.

[Damaris]

Okay, everything still. Is Cole included.

[Julian]

No, it's not.

[Mall]

Well, Cole is. Cole's situation is different from Drake's situation.

[Damaris]

Time will pass and everyone will be fine. But in this moment right now, if you look at that Friday, after everything that ensued over the last month, we got a zesty drill record from Cole and Drake rapping about all the shit Kendrick accused him of on Meet the Grams. He's the boogeyman.

[Mall]

But you don't. You don't think that that was part of his angle to do that.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but does it. Does it hit.

[Rory]

No, I think.

[Mall]

I think so.

[Rory]

I think this is a little. A good strategy, but a little too late. I think Drake's trying to go in on a joke, but he's the butt of the joke. And he thinks, like, oh, I'm in on it now. It's like, no, people are still. We're still clowning you. Just because you rapped over it doesn't mean it's now your moment. Like, you still lost. That's how I look at it. I think I was like, you're a little too late, bro. Like, this is cute, but it's not gonna dig you out of the hole you're already in.

[Julian]

I don't even think he cares about that, though.

[Rory]

I Don't either.

[Julian]

I don't think he cares. I think. And I think the people who listen to Sexy Red's music are gonna enjoy the Drake verse and people who just listen to Drake are gonna enjoy the Drake. I don't.

[Mall]

Yeah, like, why. But why you saying, like, he's in a hole and all, like, wit? Is that what people. How people feel?

[Julian]

The general consensus is that he lost ball. That's the general consensus.

[Mall]

I get that part. But what hole is he in?

[Damaris]

He's Drake. He's not in a hole.

[Julian]

Obviously he's not.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but.

[Mall]

But that's what I'm.

[Damaris]

But the perception and the brand for the first time has looked different. It didn't even affect him when the ghostwriting shit came out. This is the first time his brand has been compromised. So everything he does now is going to be judged drastically different than it was before.

[Mall]

Okay, but how has the brand been compromised? Compromised?

[Damaris]

Kendrick Duckworth. What's his last name?

[Rory]

Yeah, it's a pretty cool last name.

[Damaris]

Kendrick. Compromise. The br.

[Mall]

How?

[Julian]

That's really his last name?

[Damaris]

Yeah, he. There's a. The number one record in the world is calling him a pedophile.

[Mall]

Oh, out of here.

[Damaris]

That's small.

[Mall]

No, it doesn't. It doesn't.

[Damaris]

I think again, time will pass and everyone will be fine. But everything that Drake does now, Cole as well, is going to be judged drastically different than it ever has been before. So, yeah, this probably, in the long run, this was a good move. Just do some clown and have a blast so everyone can start to get away from this instead of doing some hard rap record. I get why Cole and Drake both made those moves, but I'm still going to look at it under the microscope as the month of May, 2024. This has all been in one month.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

So, yeah, we're looking at cold different after that whole thing when he's talking about Shorty and his phone named Grippy and then Drake just doing the BBL like that.

[Julian]

Sound like you hating a little bit. I don't know.

[Damaris]

What am I hating on?

[Julian]

Like Shorty. His phone name. Grippy. Okay.

[Damaris]

It's a wild name to put in your phone. All right, You.

[Julian]

You definitely saved a girl on your phone. That's some wild.

[Rory]

What's the wild?

[Damaris]

Yeah, a guy's name so I wouldn't get caught.

[Rory]

James.

[Mall]

That Ballin.

[Julian]

That's. No. All right.

[Damaris]

See, I like it.

[Julian]

That was funny.

[Damaris]

Oh, I don't even know where. I'm having a rough day. So it's under a microscope.

[Julian]

Rate the Verse one to ten.

[Damaris]

Which verses?

[Julian]

Drake's. We know how you feel about Kohl's. Drake's. Rate the verse.

[Damaris]

I actually think Cole's verse is good. I just w. I just wish Cole wasn't rapping it.

[Rory]

That's a wild kind of hate, that sound.

[Julian]

You sound like Maul when you said.

[Mall]

That'S a weird type of hate, yo. See, that's what I'm saying. Why? Why he sound like me? Why?

[Julian]

Because you keep saying you don't want to hear cold rap. That sounded like something you.

[Damaris]

It's a great verse for that song. And when we were playing it last episode, I was like, this is gonna work. It's not for me, but I wish someone else besides Cole was rapping that. I wish Cole wrote that and someone else just wrapped it.

[Mall]

That's what somebody.

[Damaris]

That's not hate.

[Mall]

It's just somebody on Twitter said, I thought this was AI. And then I found out it was really cold. I was like, it's gonna all feel like that for a while.

[Damaris]

I think I. I have no rating for either of those records except for I apologize for saying he wasn't the Boogeyman.

[Rory]

We're in the aftershock phase of this whole beef still. Yeah, it's over, but like, we're still under the lens of all that just happened, so shit's gonna be weird for a little bit.

[Mall]

I'm interested to see the music that both of these artists respectfully put out.

[Rory]

Coming out of this solo music, you mean?

[Julian]

I think Drake goes on that hype fuck features.

[Mall]

Fuck all of that shit. I want to hear what Kendrick has, what Drake has. And although I probably.

[Rory]

You're gonna listen to it.

[Mall]

I'm gonna force myself to listen to Cole.

[Damaris]

You're going to listen to the fall off and you're going to enjoy it.

[Mall]

But he pissed me off. Still can't believe Cole did that, bro. That is the crate. I don't think y'all understand how crazy that is.

[Damaris]

I think I matter at the Friday. I actually would have preferred if Cole just came out talking this. No rapper could with me. I would have preferred that over Grippy.

[Mall]

Yeah, man, that is just. I. I don't know.

[Rory]

Two gentlemen that didn't see eye to eye that were also involved with this beef. Metro, more than 21 Savage went on IG Live. 21 was on Live, and Metro joined. And then pretty early into the live of him joining 21 found some comments that Metro left before he jumped on.

[Mall]

Your mic ain't working, bro. You on that po ass wi Fi, your mic ain't working.

[Julian]

My poor ass Wi Fi is hilarious.

[Mall]

Is this Metro on Get off my.

[Julian]

Life 21 Savage and Metro.

[Mall]

I ain't see Autumn.

[Rory]

So in the middle of the. Of the middle of him joining, he saw that Metro was leaving some pretty up comments. Not but like you know, unfavorable comments about 21 Savage.

[Julian]

What did he call him? An Ovo Savage?

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Wrong with I'm from the block. Didn't they?

[Rory]

Yeah. Yes.

[Mall]

Bullying. So he blocked. So he blocked Metro after accepting him in his life, one person submit report.

[Damaris]

Snitched.

[Rory]

Hilarious.

[Julian]

So funny.

[Damaris]

Is he ovo21 though?

[Mall]

I mean well Drake is obviously his guy, but I mean him and Metro. Him and Metro, obviously that was his.

[Damaris]

Guy before the Drake.

[Mall]

Yeah, no, they. They still cool. I think this is all just in fun and, and jokes and like that. I don't think this is no real, no real beef.

[Damaris]

But there was another clip like weeks ago when someone asked him that on IG Live and he was like they'll figure it out. Like I felt bad for 21 at that point.

[Julian]

They'll figure it out.

[Damaris]

Like I, I felt for him. But you being in the middle of that type of Is yeah. Insane. Because this isn't just some behind the scenes riff now. Like this is a whole different animal when.

[Mall]

But you can understand that type of role. Like you cool with both parties and now beefing and been there before. You gotta play this kind of neutral ground as much as possible and you hope that it doesn't go too overboard so you can understand the position that 21 has. It's like Dan, these are both my guys. Obviously you know. You know he has. He's probably had a relationship with Metro longer then he's had a relationship with Drake. But Drake has probably done more for 21's career than.

[Damaris]

I don't know about all that.

[Mall]

Explain.

[Julian]

Just swing around in the chair. Crazy.

[Mall]

Anthony, explain.

[Damaris]

How many projects did Metro and 21 have?

[Mall]

I don't know but one of them I really, really like.

[Damaris]

Let's. Let's pull up Metro and 21 because they have Savage Mode 1 and 2. Right. Which I think definitely built a lot of 21's core for sure. I'm pretty sure Metro Boomin produced bank account. 21 is probably his biggest record.

[Rory]

He produced X too.

[Damaris]

He did most of what I'm looking here. The. It's a album. He did damn near that entire thing.

[Julian]

Bank Account was actually produced by 21 Savage. Metro just looped the beat for him. The Bank Account was produced by 21 Savage.

[Mall]

Okay, well, yeah, I think that.

[Damaris]

Wait, what?

[Julian]

Yeah, he came out on Everyday Struggle.

[Mall]

Why you look so confused, yo? He was like, why you look so confused, though?

[Damaris]

What do you mean? He just looped the beat.

[Julian]

On Everyday Struggle 21 Savage appeared as a guest. When asked about his production on the track, 21 stated, bank account was just straight me. Metro just dragged it out to make it long enough for me to rap on and added the little pauses in the beat, but the melody, the bass, the sample, the high hat, I did all of that.

[Damaris]

Okay, so he just engineered it.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Okay, cool. I just wasn't sure what you meant. Like, he just. Just came in, was like, yo, loop that.

[Rory]

I did all the.

[Mall]

He just.

[Damaris]

He did. He just did copy and paste a bunch of times. All right, cool. All right, well, now you understand that's important.

[Mall]

You Metro take and do what I did, but keep doing it over and over. Like, keep making it do that over and over and over.

[Damaris]

No, I know how to hit Command V and Pro Tools as well. Yeah, just keep doing that.

[Mall]

Make it do what it do. But yeah, I think that obviously all of that, everything that Metro did for 21, as far as, you know, his. His sound and creating his core following and this sound that he. He has obviously holds its place. But I think what Drake was able to do was put met. Put 21 on a different. On a different level. He took all of that and elevated it to the level it's at now. The Herloss album, obviously the tour, I think that turned 21 probably into the biggest star that he is now.

[Damaris]

I mean, but if you refer to the last verse of Not Like Us might have done more for Drake.

[Mall]

I don't even know the last verse. Not Like Us.

[Damaris]

I know you don't.

[Mall]

What is the laugh? What does that mean?

[Julian]

Savage helped you get your lingo up?

[Damaris]

No, I was a baby.

[Julian]

Oh, what is that?

[Damaris]

I was just suggesting that what people have said about Drake way before the Kendrick beef of that he just takes from people and that he was really just doing this with 21.

[Rory]

You said 21 gave.

[Damaris]

That was to help Drake. It wasn't help 21.

[Rory]

21 gave you false street cred.

[Damaris]

I don't even care about that bar.

[Rory]

That was his involvement.

[Damaris]

I believe it or not. And I hate to be on Mole's side with this whole thing. I really hate the third verse of Not Like Us.

[Rory]

You don't like history lessons?

[Damaris]

2 Chain said you good, but he lied. I hate that first so much.

[Mall]

I just think because he could have cooked.

[Damaris]

Like, there's a lot to deal with with what he's saying.

[Julian]

Yeah, but the direction he went, but he just didn't do it well.

[Damaris]

Yeah, like, I didn't even. Like, Little Baby helped you get your lingo up. Like, I just didn't get it. He started out crazy with a history lesson, but then just didn't land the point, in my opinion. But who am I? I'm just a white guy that goes to Atlanta. You know, they mind his business.

[Julian]

Hip hop.

[Mall]

I ain't gonna lie. I hope Drake don't never give none of these another verse again in his life.

[Julian]

Well, that's not fair, because they didn't say nothing.

[Mall]

All your day parties is gonna be trash as a motherfucker if you gotta listen to this trash that's out here. Without Drake, y'all day parties are gonna suck.

[Damaris]

Wait, we can't just play old Drake music at day parties.

[Mall]

I mean, of course you're gonna have to play some Drake music for the party dope. I'm just talking about new shit. I hope he don't give a nigga a verse ever again. And I want to see what you niggas is streaming at that point.

[Damaris]

All right, so out of everyone that was on that list would push ups.

[Mall]

Everyone talking about everybody. Nobody.

[Rory]

No, that's not how Drake operates, though.

[Mall]

All right? That's why I said what I said.

[Rory]

You just want Drake to do solo work because.

[Mall]

Because when? Because now all of a sudden, it's beef. Oh, he gave you street cred. He helped your lingo and he's.

[Julian]

What?

[Mall]

What are y'all talking about, man? Stop acting like he didn't help all of you. That's all I'm saying. Like, that is crazy. Like, you can't. Because I think it's dope when you admit, like, nah, he definitely gave a nigga a look. I think that's flying. The beef to be like, nah, that definitely helped me out. You can on a. That helped you out, but you ain't got to act like he didn't help you out is what I'm saying.

[Julian]

But none of those people did that outside of, like, the people who are beefing with him. None of the people that Kendrick named did that.

[Mall]

I'm not. No, I'm. I'm just talking about the. The. The narrative that's being painted. Oh, he stole from them. He needed that artist for street cred. He needed it. No, he didn't. What are you talking about? You think Drake needs street cred? Drake don't need to go in the street. Ain't selling drugs.

[Damaris]

He's selling music, man. Ask 21. Could you do something for me?

[Julian]

You doing the math.

[Mall]

No, you're not.

[Damaris]

Can you text my. My ex for me?

[Julian]

Like, what the is wrong?

[Mall]

Like, you ain't feel that Damaris?

[Julian]

Yeah, I felt.

[Mall]

Definitely text the ex for your girl.

[Julian]

Before, but I'm a woman.

[Mall]

Okay, what that mean? I can't text one of my. My homeboy's exes for him?

[Julian]

Can you please don't tell me ex for me?

[Mall]

Yeah, why not? Okay, like, if she got him blocked.

[Julian]

Listen, the slap.

[Mall]

If she got him blocked, I'm like, if she got him blocked, my man. Like, yo, dog, text her. Tell her please, though. Like, I'm blocked. I can't text my ex with my homeboy or his ex for him. Like, she got him blocked. Like, I could definitely see that happening. Like, yo, she got me blocked on everything, though. Tell her I love her.

[Julian]

But why she got me a. I.

[Mall]

Mean, well, you know, that's a.

[Rory]

Still smoke.

[Mall]

Yeah, yeah, that's a. That's a specific.

[Rory]

She has a pussy.

[Mall]

Two things could be true.

[Damaris]

If my ex has me blocked and I asked my homeboy to text her and say, I love you, she's gonna block my homeboy, too.

[Mall]

We all block fuck before he. Homie, what I'm gonna do to like. Nah, I ain't gonna do that.

[Damaris]

I guess maybe if it was Savage, it'd be different. I don't know.

[Mall]

You gotta text, like, your eye, man, or at least give it a go. Yeah, man, take my.

[Damaris]

Maybe. Maybe 21 is that friend, like, in the relationship that he could be. Oh, shit. It's all coming together. He's the mediator between Metro and Drake. All right, maybe that is 21. Savage, he's that type of person. He's the friend that can talk to your ex. He can figure out where the conflict is. Like, yo, I know he's tripping. Let me talk to you tri get this information.

[Julian]

21 gonna make her laugh a little bit. So she got his.

[Mall]

Nah, don't make my girl laugh. We not doing that. You ain't texting my girl and y'all laughing and shit. The fuck. Now you're going against everything I just asked you to do. Don't be funny.

[Damaris]

He. He walked down the street with Amber Rose with a shirt that said, I'm a slut.

[Julian]

So he's for the feminist.

[Damaris]

That's the guy I need in my corner to text my ex.

[Julian]

What the you looking at me like that for?

[Rory]

He did it.

[Mall]

21 A feminist don't do that.

[Rory]

He is, bro.

[Julian]

He was at the slut walk. He's a feminist.

[Mall]

You do any. You do crazy things for love, man. He was in love, all right? It is what it is.

[Rory]

He was slutting it up.

[Mall]

I would. I probably would. I probably would have did that, too. I was Never mad at 21 when he did that. I got it. I understood it.

[Rory]

Look at that. They look like they just left Comic Con.

[Mall]

You got that? I know that because. Ain't doing that.

[Damaris]

21 hasn't done that since.

[Mall]

I know. I know. She was in there doing some crazy to that. Look at the he was doing.

[Julian]

Can y'all not.

[Mall]

Oh, I know that. Fire. You know when it's fire, you can look at your man and tell this.

[Damaris]

He.

[Mall]

He eating different. He doing all kinds. He in there drinking smoothies, and.

[Julian]

She.

[Mall]

Got that going to rallies.

[Damaris]

Never meditated a day in his life.

[Mall]

Yo, I was never mad at that. 21, bro. Never.

[Rory]

What's the wildest? Because obviously, to your point, this is ob out of his character. What's the wildest. A girl's, like, you've done to try to impress a girl or, like, do to get her approval?

[Damaris]

Is that me?

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Oh, that really looks a lot like Rory.

[Mall]

Oh, I think I might have tried a Pilates class with a girl. Never again. Oh, my God, never again.

[Rory]

I was gonna say. Mine's a. Mine's doing yoga classes. That sucked.

[Mall]

That Pilates is for the. That is. That is. That little machine. You look at that like, what the. Yeah, you lay down and start trying that if you want a reformer fam. That is.

[Rory]

That's crazy.

[Mall]

That is crazy. That Pilates is different.

[Damaris]

I might have done, like, a quick once over of astrology, even though I publicly hated that.

[Rory]

You downloaded. You downloaded the app.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I tried to sound like I knew what I was talking about. I went deep into her sign, even though I'll be on this podcast like that. So if she listened to one episode, she would know that I was full of. Yeah, I think I did a whole astrology.

[Mall]

Yeah. So we can't be mad at 21 for holding the I'm a HO2 sign and going to the million. What was it? Million Slut March. What was that name? Not for real. Wasn't it. Wasn't it something. It was just a stuff.

[Julian]

Million Slut March. I mean, insane.

[Mall]

I thought that's what it was called. I thought it was the Million Slip March. I don't know. All right. Slut walk Whatever.

[Damaris]

Jay Electronics is gonna snuff you next time. You see?

[Mall]

Why. Why? I thought that's what they called it, but okay. I would have did the slow walk, too. I'm not mad at 21 for that at all, man. I totally understand.

[Damaris]

Like, oh, I'm linking at this.

[Mall]

The slut walk. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, actually, I don't know how more. His homeboys wasn't with him. I don't know. Where you going?

[Damaris]

To the.

[Mall]

What we going?

[Damaris]

I don't think there's ever been a better response to yo, are they outside? No, they're all outside.

[Mall]

Yeah, Today in the same park.

[Damaris]

Just follow them.

[Mall]

Give me a sign. I'm a whole two two. I'm a whole two two right next to that. What y'all. Just for Amber, man. Listen, y'all is crazy.

[Julian]

Or, you know, and for just women's ability to, like, sleep with who they.

[Rory]

Want without being shame. No, no.

[Mall]

Yeah, but that's. That's secondary. When your girl's Amber, like, that's the. That's the priority. Wherever she going, I'm going. That's priority. And then you get there, ask her, yo, so what's this for? I don't know what it's for.

[Julian]

So what's y'all cost?

[Mall]

Yo, so what y'all. Yeah, like, I thought this was for.

[Damaris]

Ms. Well, we walking for good.

[Mall]

Oh, okay.

[Rory]

All right.

[Mall]

All right. We outside.

[Damaris]

I bet we sled today.

[Mall]

Yeah. Yeah, it's all good.

[Rory]

So in the way in which women can.

[Damaris]

I only have five bodies. That'd be my.

[Julian]

Yeah, but our women. Okay, so y'all are dating women, right? Are women still getting that off, like, in their 30s? Cuz, like, I know in your 20s, like, that's when you were supposed to get it off. But like, in your.

[Mall]

The.

[Julian]

I only have five bodies.

[Rory]

Ask that.

[Julian]

But in your 30s. Are women still getting off that? I only have five. Like, you can't only have five bodies.

[Mall]

What do you mean by getting it off? You can say it whether I'm a. Believe it or not. No, but also, like, you can't get.

[Julian]

That off from 19 to 40.

[Rory]

Like, ask that.

[Julian]

You'd be surprised that.

[Rory]

Am I tripping? I think that's some loser ass to do is to ask someone that. How many people have you. I think that's the loser ass.

[Julian]

But men still ask.

[Damaris]

That's the last time I asked that. I was in high school, when it.

[Rory]

Was like, you're a loser if you ask women that.

[Damaris]

I mean, we've Established already in this episode that I'm a loser, so.

[Rory]

Yeah, but like, when you're like, 16, it's like, oh, have you yet? It's different when you're like, that young.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I was just curious.

[Rory]

Like, you're in your 30s, 40s.

[Damaris]

I wouldn't even shut up. I don't even want to know the answer to anything.

[Rory]

Yeah, why does that even matter? We're just gonna undo the dick. Like, I don't get. What's the goal?

[Damaris]

They want to know how many bodies you got this week. So I know where I. Condom or not.

[Rory]

That's a much better question.

[Damaris]

Right? That's a logical one.

[Rory]

Or just like, when's the last time you've been tested? Like, something that's, like, relevant to, like, what you're about to do. Not, like, yo, you catch 13 dicks in 20? 2012, like, gives a.

[Julian]

2012 was a good year to catch a dick.

[Damaris]

What if she did catch 13 in 2012? How you feeling?

[Rory]

It's fine. It's whatever. Like, that's not. It's actually not that bad of a percentage. 365 days. 13. That's not. I'm not a math guy, but that's not a high number.

[Julian]

That's more. No, that's more than once a month. It's like 1.12amonth if it's a leap year.

[Damaris]

I was about to say if there's a leap year. February 29th, you got that. You got that 13th dick.

[Rory]

Snuck it in right before New Year's.

[Julian]

Paid the dick forward. That's wild.

[Rory]

I know. I'm gonna get killed for this. 13 bodies a year is not crazy. A dick a month.

[Damaris]

I don't. I don't know. And I. From my own ego, I don't even think about these types of things.

[Mall]

Don't want to know how many they girls slept with.

[Rory]

Because then you can start calculating how many inches that is.

[Damaris]

What we already know the rabbit holes. I go down if thinking about if 13 bodies is too much for a year, and then I find out certain information. I don't need that type of stress in my life.

[Mall]

I never want to know how to do.

[Rory]

You can do the math on, like, how many inches. So like, if.

[Mall]

What are you talking about right now?

[Rory]

No, sorry, sorry. And started smoking. So now I'm getting high. But if it was 13, don't blame me, though.

[Mall]

Don't do that.

[Rory]

What's the average dick?

[Mall]

Weed smoking never want to make me want to calculate inches of dick. I don't even know why you got your phone out right now. Put your phone away.

[Rory]

Calculator.

[Mall]

Put your phone away.

[Rory]

What's the average length.

[Mall]

Put your phone away. Crazy right now.

[Damaris]

We're not gonna solve for X. Yeah.

[Mall]

What does he talk about? We smoke. Ain't never made a. Want to multiply dicks.

[Rory]

Like, put your calculator with math.

[Mall]

Put your calculator away, bro. Yo, you tripping right now. He pulled out of said I. Thirteen.

[Julian]

Thirteen dicks times two, times five inches.

[Mall]

Five.

[Rory]

That's the average. That's okay, that's. That's average.

[Mall]

That's some sick. Yo, you went to college. I would have that type of math.

[Rory]

60 inches of dick in the. Over the course of a calendar year. Is that a lot?

[Damaris]

I don't know. In three business days.

[Rory]

365 divided by.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

All right, so how. Not only now you think about your. Your girl's sexual partners, you're thinking about the size of the dick with every last one of them?

[Rory]

No.

[Damaris]

How are you gauging that?

[Rory]

No, I just. I'm just curious. Like, I'm saying, if someone were to care so much about the body count of their. Of their person they're trying to sleep with, what would they want that information for? In my mind, if I'm asking for that information, I would just do, like, a light calculation. See how many inches that is per year.

[Mall]

That's how your brain works.

[Rory]

I mean, if.

[Mall]

Whatever. What do you.

[Rory]

What do you want these numbers for if you're not going to do something?

[Mall]

I don't want the numbers. Let's start there.

[Rory]

I don't either. I'm saying for those who.

[Mall]

Yeah, but now you. Now you got your calculator in your head, and I don't understand, like, how we even got there.

[Rory]

20.

[Mall]

Rory, help me out. How do we get to the calculator?

[Damaris]

Because then you go at that point, then you find it out who our exes are going to the ig. Like. Nah, he looked like a soft eight.

[Rory]

Soft eight, soft seven. Okay, let's throw a couple.

[Mall]

So now you got to inflate the numbers a little bit. Like. What are you doing? Put your phone away, bro. What are you doing?

[Damaris]

All right, let's not be misogynistic. Let's put it on this side. Would you guys be embarrassed if there was a gymnasium where you could put every girl you've slept with? Would you be embarrassed?

[Mall]

God, would I be embarrassed?

[Damaris]

Yes.

[Rory]

You mean a gymnasium. What do you mean by that?

[Mall]

I wouldn't be.

[Damaris]

Y'all get so. I just.

[Mall]

I trying to, like, just have every girl.

[Rory]

You have a venue.

[Damaris]

I only have five bodies, so it could just be the lounge over there.

[Mall]

Yeah. So.

[Damaris]

But with y'all.

[Mall]

To have every. To have every woman you've ever slept with in a room. Julian On. In the area. In a space.

[Damaris]

Yes.

[Mall]

Would I be embarrassed?

[Damaris]

A peer space. A WeWork. Airbnb.

[Mall]

Wherever they fit. Wherever they fit comfortably.

[Damaris]

MetLife. For you.

[Mall]

For me? What?

[Damaris]

I mean, because that's why I'm not measuring the amount of dick that's. That my girl has went through. Yeah, because if you had. Because I know if I legitimately had every person I've slept with in front of me, I would probably curl up in a ball and feel ashamed of myself forever. Yeah.

[Julian]

Juice. Have you drank?

[Mall]

What?

[Rory]

No, I was gonna say are cavernous. So then you just measure the inverse, which is like, how many. How deep is the. So you can. Instead of length, it would be digging a hole in the ground. So how far down? By way of how shallow or deep.

[Mall]

Yeah. You should shut the up now. Anyway. So you're saying can you stand in.

[Rory]

A hole of the amount of that you're saying.

[Damaris]

I would. I would get to where the submarine for the Titanic exploded.

[Rory]

Wow. It's impressive.

[Damaris]

I have five bodies. I'm just hypothetically. No, ask your question.

[Mall]

So all. All the women you've ever been with in a room, would you be embarrassed?

[Damaris]

Yes.

[Mall]

I wouldn't say I'd be embarrassed. I. I would.

[Damaris]

I would not. Of them. Of me and my decisions, a thousand percent.

[Rory]

I also wouldn't recognize and most of. I don't know who the. What's up?

[Damaris]

And this is going to sound like some therapy gaslighting. But we are not defined by our mistakes. So that's why I'm not trying to measure any dick my girl went through. We. There's so much I'm embarrassed about. Like I have to have the same grace to someone else.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

I've made a lot of mistakes, and I would be embarrassed looking at the people I've slept with before.

[Mall]

The interesting part for me would be, you know how you have those. Those girls that you've been with and you forgot their name or never knew it?

[Rory]

Name. I was gonna say. That's great. Name. I've reintroduced myself to women I've slept with.

[Mall]

Yeah, but that's what I'm saying.

[Rory]

I would want to see name I've gotten.

[Damaris]

Roy. Are you serious? Oh, we met before.

[Rory]

Nice to meet you. You.

[Damaris]

We.

[Julian]

Oh, my God.

[Rory]

That's happened a few times.

[Damaris]

No, I. Listen I'm not proud of it.

[Mall]

I just told you I would. I would have went with 21 years ago. I would have went. I would have accompanied that brother right next to him. Like, I would gladly. But that's up though. When you think about it as a woman and a guy, forget that he has sex with you. Man, that's tough.

[Damaris]

I feel like you've done that. There's no fun.

[Rory]

You've definitely done me.

[Damaris]

Yes.

[Mall]

For sure. All right.

[Damaris]

So don't judge us.

[Mall]

I'm not judging. I said that's tough for a girl.

[Julian]

Like if she's now thinking about if there's anybody that can forget that they slept with me. Like there's anybody I remember having sex with that probably forgot they slept with me. I'm gonna be thinking about that.

[Mall]

100 is it? Probably 100.

[Rory]

You gotta delete me.

[Mall]

100. A guy has slept with you and forgot you.

[Julian]

You know why I don't think that that is. And it literally has nothing to do with my sexual prowess or anything like that. The majority of the people that I've slept with have been friends of like there was a relationship there either there before or thereafter.

[Mall]

Like, oh.

[Julian]

Like, you know what I'm saying? Like we. We ran. You're gonna see me again. Like, we ran in similar circles. You knew who I was before we slept together. So that. That's probably why you never had like a.

[Mall]

Like a meet out of nowhere hookup. You never had that?

[Julian]

No, not with somebody who I didn't know like of them. Like I've done that with a friend of a friend, but we became friends after. Like, I've never. I've never. Every time I try to have a one night stand, I end up in a relationship. So I'm dead ass. I'm dead.

[Mall]

Hey, yo. Every time. Every time I tried to have all my relationships start every time I tried to have a one night stand, I end up in a relationship. That's some funny.

[Damaris]

So I'm not usually the most successful relationships when y'all. The first night stand.

[Mall]

Because I think it gets all of that out the way. Like, you know, the weird space of courting and not that courting is weird, but like that whole.

[Damaris]

I just think there's less pressure and like expectations at that point.

[Mall]

Yeah. It's like the build up of all this.

[Damaris]

Like now I'm viewing you in a way of like, I'm. I have to court you. I'm being a representation of myself. Like, yeah, well y'all just. And then it's like, yo, I. I think you're cool. We should get to know each other.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Best way, in my opinion.

[Mall]

Yeah. Because once you've seen each other naked, sex faces watch me walk to the bathroom with the condom on. Like, what's more off? Yeah. It's like, come on. Like, I don't have what secrets.

[Rory]

If they can survive Damaris's Jada Kiss voice.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

I just feel like it gets rid of. Of that representative that you bring to, like, first dates, courting and all that. Like, all right, man, we've had sex already. I don't need to lie about anything anymore.

[Mall]

Right.

[Rory]

I had sex before this date.

[Mall]

So. Nicki Minaj was arrested and released in Amsterdam.

[Damaris]

She was freed.

[Julian]

Okay.

[Mall]

I didn't see. I didn't think we.

[Damaris]

We traded El Chapo for her or whatever the United States does anytime someone gets locked up.

[Mall]

How long did they. Did they detain her for?

[Julian]

A couple hours.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

And she was in Amsterdam.

[Rory]

I don't get it. How does she get arrested for weed possession? Everything's legal in Amsterdam.

[Mall]

Going through the airport.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Oh, she brought it. Okay, I didn't know that. Yeah.

[Julian]

You can't.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's not smart.

[Mall]

Wait, did she bring it to Amsterdam or. They was trying to fly out of Amsterdam.

[Julian]

I think it had to be two because she had a show, and I think she missed the show.

[Mall]

Oh, okay.

[Julian]

Or she might have had a show somewhere else that she missed, but I. I don't remember.

[Mall]

But she bringing weed to Amsterdam.

[Rory]

Yeah. It's like, what are you doing?

[Damaris]

I think that's the plot of the second Harold and Kumar.

[Rory]

Sand of the beach.

[Mall]

Yeah. Like, yo, you're going to Amsterdam. Like, I promise you, you're gonna get some great weed there.

[Damaris]

I mean, I. I give her some grace the way I did Joel Santana. Sometimes you grab the wrong bag.

[Mall]

Yeah, no, you're right. I didn't even think about it like that. Sometimes I've grabbed the roll bag so many times.

[Damaris]

Joel's just grabbed the one that had the gun in it.

[Mall]

Yeah. Damn.

[Julian]

Or sometimes something is just in your bag all the time. You don't even think to. Because I've accidentally bought drugs through the airport and I didn't even know it was just in that bag that I packed. Like, I didn't even think about it.

[Damaris]

Suddenly bring water bottles through. So weed I can understand. Yeah. But, I mean, I saw her. Her whole Twitter, responsive. It's because my tour is so successful and they're trying to bring me down now. Sometimes you just forget weeds in the.

[Mall]

Back yeah, sometimes you just.

[Damaris]

Your tour is super successful right now. Yeah, like, that's all you're doing, all the numbers. Great. But.

[Mall]

So did they reschedule the show? I'm sure they had to.

[Julian]

Actually, I think they might have just canceled it.

[Mall]

Nah, they gotta do that. There's no way they just gonna cancel that show. They gotta reschedule that show because I'm pretty sure it was probably sold out.

[Damaris]

Listen, you got your man on tour. Just have him hold the weed.

[Julian]

Yeah, it's postponed.

[Mall]

There you go. Yeah, yeah, they gotta have it. The show has to happen, though. But, I mean, shout out to Nikki, you know, stay safe out there. And I'm glad that, you know, she was released. And hopefully this is, you know, something that doesn't happen again, because that I did see the live where they was trying to tell her to get into the van, and Nick, he was like, I'm not going in there. I was like, yo, I know that feeling. That little tight ass cubby they try to put you in. Nah, I'm not with it. It.

[Damaris]

Can you explain Gag City to me? Are you a resident of Gag?

[Mall]

No. What is Gag City?

[Rory]

That's her whole thing.

[Julian]

That's Nikki's. Like, it's like her thing. Like, it's basically like the tour, the concert. It's just Nikki's little imaginary world with her barbs, so.

[Damaris]

But what does Gag, like, what does Gag mean in that regard?

[Julian]

Gag is like, kind of like, oh.

[Mall]

God, like, I'm killing y'all. Like, choking?

[Julian]

Yeah, kind of like that. Like, oh, he. Like, you know, like, h. Like, h, you up, up. It's another gotcha. That kind of thing.

[Damaris]

No, I've just seen her hashtag it for, like, a year. I just didn't know what it meant, and I didn't want to ask or.

[Rory]

You want your Gag City passport, Rory?

[Damaris]

No.

[Rory]

One way ticket to Gag.

[Damaris]

I'll use my United States issued.

[Julian]

Were y'all Ghetto Gaggers fans?

[Mall]

Excuse me.

[Rory]

Wow, I haven't heard Ghetto. Wow, it's been so long since I've heard that.

[Mall]

What is Ghetto Gaggers?

[Rory]

Think about it, Mall.

[Mall]

Well, I know what gagging is. Well, what is. Well, I know what ghetto is, too, so I can.

[Rory]

There you go.

[Damaris]

But, like, I'm trying to use context clues, and I still don't get it.

[Rory]

But, like, when you hear Gag, your initial thought was probably getting head. Yeah, Ghetto Gaggers was a. A sub porn site of just, like, this aggressive head. Just hood butchers just throwing dick.

[Mall]

Okay.

[Rory]

Crazy.

[Damaris]

Oh, wow, I missed that.

[Rory]

I Don't want to put this on the screen, but.

[Mall]

Yeah, please don't think. Yeah.

[Julian]

Is it calculated or you're gonna go look that up? Yeah, I think they're still operating.

[Mall]

They're still operating.

[Rory]

At least they have archive footage. I don't know if they're still dropping classics today, but what years were we talking?

[Damaris]

Like, what's. What's the resolution of this footage?

[Mall]

I think. I think that was probably like, oh, eight.

[Rory]

Look at around 2008.

[Mall]

I was like, 2008.

[Rory]

It was just like the most aggressive. Just like spit.

[Mall]

But see, all of this shit changed. You know, we don't get platforms like this anymore because you have OnlyFans now. So it's like, you know, women that are doing what do these videos they put make their own money? Yeah, yeah.

[Julian]

Damn. Is OnlyFans like bankrupting the porn industry? Like, are they losing money? Is pornhub losing money?

[Damaris]

I.

[Julian]

Or maybe like this.

[Rory]

I think pornhub's become a promotional tool for a lot of. Only fans.

[Julian]

Yeah, for sure.

[Rory]

They put a lot of their content up there still.

[Mall]

Yeah. Because they have so many. They have so many people that visit those sites, though.

[Rory]

Yeah, yeah.

[Julian]

Five minute clips for second.

[Rory]

Second to Google for most visit site.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Which is crazy.

[Damaris]

It's probably like the, like the browser sites that are probably losing more than.

[Julian]

Pornhub is and the production company in the name.

[Damaris]

It's just the hub of where all the porn is. Like. Yeah, that is the timeline. So I think the subscription ones are probably losing because I'm just like, I'll just go straight to the consumer.

[Julian]

Yeah. And I'll go to like. Because you could be searching through those sites for who you specifically want to see when you could just go directly to who you want to see and pay for all their content.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

It's just they're taking a tech9 business approach with their porn.

[Rory]

Pressing T shirts.

[Damaris]

Why do I need to sign to a major?

[Mall]

No, but you. You joking. But that's.

[Damaris]

I'm dead.

[Mall]

That's exactly what it is.

[Damaris]

Yeah, we don't need to do that. That subscription where you paying me 10k for a scene?

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Nah, I can make that in a day.

[Mall]

Exactly. But one scene, one clip.

[Damaris]

Did you see this, Lizzo?

[Mall]

No. I came in and y'all asked me about it and y'all said, no, we're gonna show it to you on camera. So. All right, just tell me, am I. Am I gonna give a reaction that may get me canceled?

[Rory]

No, no, no, no, you won't.

[Mall]

Okay, cool.

[Rory]

All right.

[Mall]

So. All right, Julian, roll the tape.

[Rory]

Yeah. All I need to know is the south park dropped a new episode, and it's about Ozempic.

[Mall]

Okay. There we go.

[Julian]

These new drugs are pretty amazing. I was feeling so ashamed of myself.

[Damaris]

I think it's cool that Lizzo still uses all the time and not eating headphones with a cord, but I just.

[Mall]

Don'T have the same kind of willpower he has.

[Rory]

True artist.

[Damaris]

Which of the drugs are you on, Sharon?

[Mall]

OIC Manjaro.

[Rory]

Oh, no.

[Julian]

I talked to my doctor.

[Damaris]

He said insurance would only pay for those if I had diabetes.

[Mall]

But if you can't afford them, then.

[Julian]

How are you managing your weight?

[Damaris]

Liz's already pissed.

[Julian]

No, Sheila.

[Mall]

Now there's a whole new obesity drug.

[Julian]

For those of us who can't afford OIC and Manjaro.

[Damaris]

I controlled all my cravings to be thinner with Lizo.

[Julian]

No, it was Lizzo's face.

[Damaris]

Makes you feel good about your weight.

[Mall]

Cost 90% less than OIC.

[Damaris]

My standards and my expectations. I love that they're on Go Karts. I don't give two shits. Lizzo helps you eat everything you want and keep physical activity to a minimum. Some patients report constipation while listening. Stop listening to Lizzo.

[Mall]

If you experience suicidal thoughts, does serious.

[Julian]

Side effects may include pancreatitis, hypothermia, what the album.

[Damaris]

Are you living with concerns of obesity?

[Mall]

Ask about the power of not giving.

[Damaris]

A with Lizzo, period.

[Mall]

That's crazy. I thought that was dope.

[Julian]

I think it's dope, too. And I think she thought it was dope, too.

[Rory]

She liked it.

[Julian]

She liked it.

[Rory]

The rest of the clip is her saying, like, look, I made it to South Park. Like, this is dope. I taught people not to give a. Like, she was pretty proud of it.

[Mall]

But that's fire. I think that's exactly what it is.

[Rory]

It.

[Mall]

And then you don't give a. Like, it is what it is. Like, Lizzo is comfortable in her skin. We all know that.

[Julian]

Like, yeah, that is Lizzo song.

[Mall]

And then it's South Park. So it's kind of like, you know, I mean, that's like, bro, that's south park.

[Rory]

Episode is great.

[Julian]

They went easy on her. Yeah, they went extremely easy.

[Damaris]

Kanye is still rapping about south park to this day. Yeah, that's how upset he is.

[Mall]

Yeah. But no, that. I thought that was. I thought that was dope. I don't think that was nothing too crazy. I mean, you know.

[Damaris]

Well, I mean, shout out to Lizzo.

[Mall]

For being, you know, not being so full of herself to where she would get upset at some like that. Like, she seemed like she just was like, the album part when he was listening to the album, that she's like, not the. Yeah, not the fucking album. But, I mean, I thought that was cool, man. Like, these are. These are some of the classic, you know, cartoons and. And shows that we all grew up watching and we love. So if you've that. That is a nod to Lizzo being as successful and, as, you know, big of an artist as she is.

[Damaris]

Julian sent that to me over the weekend, and I replied with, after that period, I can tell that she's going to take that suppressed rage out on one of her employees, make them go.

[Mall]

To a strip club.

[Julian]

She is so pretty. When I was watching that clip and she has, like, no makeup, hair not done, I was looking at her face. I was like, lizzo is a very.

[Mall]

Pretty girl, but all big girls got pretty faces.

[Julian]

They do. Thank you. I finally found somebody that agree with me. It'd be big girls, and I'd be like, y'all don't see that face, that face card?

[Mall]

And the thing is, if Lizzo was to get too small, she probably. It would look. She. Yeah, it's like, it always goes that way. It's like, you ain't as pretty as you.

[Rory]

Is she not on Ozempic or any of those? No, that's dope. Because, like that. Because there's people where it's like, this is cool. Until there's an opportunity to change the circumstances. Yeah, but she's not doing it. She's just staying herself. That's dope.

[Damaris]

All right. Do we have voicemails?

[Rory]

We do. Let's just lean into what we know. A wild case of cheating you.

[Mall]

I'm gonna try to make this fast. So this is D from Houston, and I just want to know which one is worse to y'all and what would y'all do? Because me and my homies, we kind of up about it.

[Damaris]

D from Houston.

[Mall]

So I have one associate who found out he was getting cheated on by his girl because the she was cheating on him with tagged the in a sex video on Instagram.

[Rory]

Initial thoughts, Initial thoughts.

[Damaris]

Even this is a lie.

[Mall]

Wait, his friend did what?

[Rory]

The guy tagged his girl on a sex video on Instagram.

[Mall]

A guy that was his girl before.

[Rory]

He was got, like, cheating.

[Mall]

Oh.

[Julian]

So it probably was, like, some type of sex meme. Like, I've gotten tagged in a sex.

[Damaris]

Meme before I was my brain.

[Rory]

That's what he said.

[Damaris]

All right, well, that can't happen on Instagram.

[Rory]

I don't know. Private friends.

[Mall]

You can't play that on Instagram.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Twitter, you could.

[Mall]

They would have had the whole date.

[Damaris]

That. That matches the algorithms.

[Mall]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Damaris]

Elon would have retweeted it.

[Mall]

Absolutely.

[Damaris]

All right, we'll go find it a.

[Julian]

Little bit, just so we can hear. Yeah.

[Mall]

And I just want to know which one is worse to y'all and what would y'all do? Because me and my homies, we kind of up about it. So I have one associate who found out he was getting cheated on by his girl because the. She was cheating on him with. Tagged the. In a sex video on Instagram.

[Rory]

That sounds like he was.

[Julian]

He tagged the. The boyfriend.

[Rory]

Yes.

[Julian]

Okay, side. Tagged a boyfriend in a sex video.

[Damaris]

Go ahead, loser.

[Mall]

His girls get threats, but this is.

[Julian]

That's a lie. That's a lie. You can't post porn on Instagram.

[Rory]

You can. It will get blocked, but you can't.

[Julian]

Okay, go ahead, question.

[Mall]

I mean, the second story is, this one's crazy. So this dude found out he was getting cheated on because he had a medical incident at home and was trying to get in contact with a shorty, but she wasn't answering because she was getting threats. So he ends up going to the hospital. A whole bunch of shit. Like, they come out. Like, he gets out, gets into an argument with her, so on and so forth, because she comes clean as to where she was. This whole ordeal happens. But in the argument, for some reason, he told her to leave his house. He, like, he told her to leave, but he left his house first. First he got picked up by his partner. She got picked up by the. While him and his partner are going down the road or going down the highway, the catches up to them with.

[Damaris]

Her in the car and rolls the.

[Mall]

Window down so that buddy could see his girl giving the other top.

[Julian]

This did not happen. None of this happened.

[Damaris]

D from Houston is a liar, but it's cool. We could just talk about.

[Julian]

None of this happened. None of that happened.

[Mall]

That ain't real, man. Yeah, D, don't. He caught up.

[Damaris]

This is all a lie. It's a lie. Something that isn't a lie. That is kind of funny. There was one time I was driving with a girl, and she said, can you slow down? I'd never want to die with a man I'm not supposed to be with.

[Rory]

Damn.

[Mall]

That's real.

[Rory]

Cause you do be driving.

[Julian]

No, but real shit, though.

[Mall]

I respect that. Yeah, I respect that.

[Damaris]

She wasn't. She was not supposed to Be with me. She had her own thing going on.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Slow down. I'm not.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

I can't die. Car accident.

[Rory]

Cheating bad in a Mazda.

[Julian]

Yeah, you was trying to swerve and stunt. Slow down, partner.

[Damaris]

You can't stunt in the Mazda, nor swerve. You're gonna feel every single turn.

[Mall]

Yeah, but that's some ain't. And that's not a real story, though. Like, I don't even wanna.

[Rory]

Okay, say it's fake. What's worse, though, of the two, I think Instagram.

[Damaris]

I think D from Houston is the worst. Making up those two stories in your head is crazy.

[Mall]

Yeah. Tagging the Instagram video in this scenario to me is worse because that probably will reach more people than me just seeing you in the car.

[Damaris]

I would go with the second half. Now we're in person, everyone's gonna die. See Instagram, like, all right, cool. We could defuse the situation. Did you pull up to me in a car and that's going on? Everyone's dead.

[Rory]

Would you crash?

[Julian]

Bodies, bodies.

[Damaris]

Like, we're all. We're all done.

[Rory]

How would you handle that?

[Damaris]

Not in a smart way, because you're.

[Rory]

Also not the one driving. Remember, in this scenario, you're his friend's driving, so you can't crash your friend's car.

[Mall]

So ma.

[Julian]

So Ma, you driving. Rory and a passenger, his bitch pull up and she giving another naked head, which you. I hate talking about fixed scenarios, but what. What you doing?

[Damaris]

And I don't even like that I'm the one in the passenger seat and it's my.

[Rory]

Another woman.

[Damaris]

Also, let's. Let's try to make it real with my.

[Rory]

Yeah, so. Because we can picture it.

[Damaris]

I mean, so I can picture the inches.

[Rory]

One of the 13m.

[Julian]

How would you handle that if that was your boy?

[Rory]

If that was your boy's the face you going on.

[Julian]

You going on the. The wild goose chase.

[Mall]

Yeah, we gotta. We gotta. We gotta follow this car. Yeah, we're gonna drive. Either we gonna drive to wherever y'all. Y'all headed, or we just gonna drive this to the gas run out.

[Damaris]

I'll take it. Sicker. What? All right, what type of car are we in?

[Mall]

I don't know. He could be in a BMW.

[Julian]

What would Ma have if he had a car?

[Rory]

What year Roy said he crash that? I'll buy you a new car.

[Damaris]

No. Cause I'm trying to think in the trunk. If they have the spare tire, there's always the. The wrench right there. Because it's not my car. I'm Trying to think what I would grab out of mall's car if I know what year it is. Because the trunk. The trunk definitely has something to change a tire, and that's going right through that window with me.

[Julian]

Like, you gonna fly with the.

[Damaris]

Yeah, okay.

[Rory]

All right.

[Damaris]

He put the window down.

[Mall]

But why.

[Damaris]

But why not?

[Mall]

See, that's what. At that point, if your girl's in the car at that point, like, what we doing, bro?

[Julian]

Look how she moving in.

[Mall]

Yeah, like, yo, like, oh, yeah.

[Damaris]

No, let's make a rational decision. When you're watching your girl give someone else head.

[Mall]

We wouldn't watch. I would get off at the next exit. I'm like, I don't want you to see that, man. Let's get off.

[Julian]

Let's get off.

[Mall]

Let's get off the highway, man.

[Julian]

Getting off in Williamsburg.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Julian]

You supposed to be on your way to Queens.

[Mall]

Yeah, I wouldn't let my homeboy, like, go crazy over that.

[Damaris]

Talk about this often I make stupid decisions. I know for a fact if we pulled up to a red light and my girl is giving some guy head, I'm like, yo, pull off. She's not worth it.

[Mall]

No, but I'm just saying, I'm crashing the out.

[Julian]

You're going to try to crash out, but you're not driving malls.

[Mall]

Yeah, like, I wouldn't let you. Like, you know what?

[Damaris]

You got the child lock on. I just get out the car. I don't need balls. Permission.

[Mall]

No, man, you can't. All right, you crash out, you hop out, you break the windows out. Then what?

[Damaris]

Nothing. Go cry in the corner.

[Mall]

This is what I'm saying. So just.

[Damaris]

You're asking for a rational thought and not irrational situation because we.

[Mall]

Because it hasn't happened. Happened. We need to just talk about it. Like, okay, just think about it for a second. After you break out the windows, you're gonna cry. You still be upset. Then what?

[Damaris]

I don't know. Produce my Netflix murder mystery while I'm doing life.

[Mall]

No, man, you can't kill no girl over that.

[Julian]

That next album gonna be fire.

[Mall]

I think dudes just get caught up in that. Like, just like it. Listen, I would be hurt. It would. I'll be like, damn this. That's crazy. But I'm not gonna go to jail and be hurt and be in the cell thinking about what I just saw. Like, where's the sense in that?

[Damaris]

Of course we had this conversation, I don't know, like, two or three episodes ago of why the. Would you even crash out over somebody. Now you're sitting in jail. Like, yeah, I'm doing it.

[Mall]

That's why it's important to think about it before the scenario ever presents itself.

[Damaris]

And I'm saying to ask a man.

[Mall]

I get it, Pull up to a.

[Damaris]

Red light and see his girl sucking dick to make a rational decision. Like, yeah, it's tough, Ma.

[Rory]

Let's go. Let's get a vegan burger.

[Damaris]

Let's go, bro.

[Mall]

Yeah, let's get out of here, man.

[Damaris]

Well, too. I know this. I know mall is full of shit, because if I told mall to pull off, he's like, you just gonna let her suck dick in front of you?

[Julian]

No, no. But to be fair, you have to remember that in this fake scenario that Dee came up with, they had already gotten into an argument because she had told him I was cheating. Like, she said. He straight said, yo, I was having a panic attack at the house. House. You wasn't here. Where the was you at? I was calling you. I was. And she told him, well, I was with so and so. Like, I was out having sex. I was with so and so. So you already know. Like, oh, we're leaving the house because she's a cheating ass. Like, I kicked her out because she's a cheating ass. So she put up sucking a dick. It's like, you already know she a cheating ass. What's the point?

[Damaris]

Well, that's why this scenario is a complete lie.

[Julian]

It's such a.

[Damaris]

That would never happen.

[Mall]

That would never happen.

[Julian]

Please stop calling.

[Mall]

You know the chances of that happening. You know what? The chances of. Of that ever happen at all.

[Damaris]

That's the boldest on earth. If that ever exists.

[Mall]

That doesn't happen. You're not going to end up in the same spot as your man in another car.

[Julian]

And if your man just. If your man just kicked you out, bro, you're not in a sucking dick mood, you homeless.

[Rory]

Well, that's why she needs to get the new home.

[Mall]

It depends.

[Rory]

That's the perfect time to.

[Julian]

Yeah, but, like, get to the house. Like, damn.

[Rory]

Like, well, you got to earn your keep.

[Julian]

We were also feminist this whole episode.

[Damaris]

The real issue here is you need.

[Rory]

A place to stay.

[Damaris]

Roadhead is dangerous.

[Julian]

Sure is.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

I never got Roadhead. I always wanted it, but I don't have a car, so it's not really gonna happen. Train head.

[Mall]

Oh, that's. That's old school.

[Julian]

Wait, what?

[Rory]

You got hit on the train?

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Mall]

How many times I've ridden the subway in New York?

[Rory]

You had. You've gotten head on the bare ass on the mv.

[Julian]

You won't eat on the train.

[Mall]

I think I pulled my. How I don't have to pull my pants all the way down and get through the little bare ass on the subway. Who does that?

[Rory]

I don't know. I'm happy.

[Damaris]

A lot of people.

[Mall]

Bare ass? No, man. Who the is doing that?

[Julian]

Who's sucking dick on the subway? It stinks.

[Rory]

And how many people are in the car? Is this like a solo?

[Mall]

Young. He was like 19, man. It was late at night.

[Damaris]

It's like we was young. I thought he was about to say like we was 13, 14. He was an adult.

[Mall]

Like 18.

[Rory]

19.

[Mall]

Yeah, that's young.

[Julian]

19 is young.

[Mall]

18.

[Damaris]

I've got.

[Mall]

I think we might have a cab.

[Damaris]

And that's the craziest as far as publication.

[Rory]

That's fine.

[Mall]

Yeah. I've gotten head on the subway ahead on the Metro North.

[Rory]

I'm talking about driving, though. That's why in the car, I was thinking as a passenger.

[Damaris]

Yeah, of course I could understand the Metro north, but like, it's the same. I mean, were you on an express or local? Like you couldn't wait.

[Mall]

She couldn't wait.

[Rory]

Local's sick. That door is slinging Open every 25 seconds.

[Julian]

I've been there. I know what he's talking about.

[Mall]

Yeah. She couldn't wait on the train.

[Julian]

Not on the train. No. He's a wild for that. That I said. He said she couldn't wait. That's. Yeah.

[Damaris]

I've never judged. If I found out you suck dick on the train. I'm judging the you would judge me?

[Julian]

You fire me.

[Mall]

The marriage definitely gave head on the train.

[Julian]

Stop playing with me.

[Rory]

You don't have to answer this.

[Julian]

Stop playing with me.

[Rory]

What's the weirdest place you suck dick?

[Julian]

What's the weirdest place? You got head? You asking me for what's the weird.

[Rory]

I'm saying I'm comfortable answering. Where's the weirdest place you duck in your mouth. I would feel like that's more of a violation.

[Mall]

Y'all ain't here. Damaris. You too.

[Julian]

Y'all pissing me off. Sorry, Ma. Pissed me off. Everybody got get it how I p yo.

[Mall]

How we come back to me all the time. Yo. I didn't even say nothing. The mayor said you too. I laugh. Yo. It's more fault.

[Julian]

Yeah, the mirrors definitely suck dick of the train before. I'm still mad about that. That's why I'm taking out on you. Like, he pissed me the off.

[Mall]

I forgot I said that. My bad, baby.

[Damaris]

How many stops before you got Home.

[Mall]

Oh, we was. We was always like low in Manhattan.

[Damaris]

Like I want to say and going to what? Hell.

[Mall]

Going up to like you're going to the Bronx.

[Rory]

Oh, so you got like.

[Mall]

It was like. It was like a 40 minute train ride. It was like 45 minutes.

[Rory]

Damn good way to stay here.

[Mall]

It's one of those. It was like going from Wall street area all the way uptown.

[Damaris]

You're nasty.

[Rory]

I've always wanted to a museum bathroom. Like one of the nice museums in the city. Those bathrooms are huge.

[Mall]

You would be in a museum.

[Rory]

I haven't. I want to.

[Mall]

Oh, I thought you said.

[Rory]

No, I haven't. But it'd be nice. I like art. I like sex. Be a great way to combine the two.

[Mall]

I like art. Hard. I like sex. Somebody sent me a meme the other day for Julie said, you'll send this to Julian. I want to play it.

[Julian]

He must be blocked.

[Mall]

No, no, no, I don't think. I don't. He's not.

[Rory]

You know, speaking of Walmart looks for that I had. I posted a video from Saturday night of terrorists playing the sacks. About 20 people responded. Yo, I thought that was mall.

[Damaris]

Oh, someone literally just said the same thing. Yeah, this was.

[Rory]

And then someone connected that my story and your story were similar. And they're like, oh, you guys had a mandate.

[Damaris]

This was. This was just now thought this was small.

[Rory]

Yeah, a lot of people thought it was you.

[Mall]

Mall Terrace.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Really?

[Damaris]

That's kind of racist because. Nothing like that.

[Mall]

It's just that they see you around another black guy and they just think it's me. I guess. I don't know.

[Julian]

It's same thing when I posted PJ and everybody was like, oh my God, Gary Owens.

[Mall]

Well, I could see that. Like, I get that.

[Damaris]

I've never put two and two together.

[Mall]

Yeah. Peach is definitely Gary. Owen. Owen, not Owens. Wow.

[Damaris]

How long we've known each other? 2013.

[Rory]

You look just like him.

[Damaris]

I've never put two and two.

[Julian]

Y'all are being white. Racist. Reverse. This is reverse racism.

[Rory]

So. Yeah, but look at. He's with a black woman. It is Peach.

[Damaris]

That's what's my ex wife. But yeah.

[Rory]

All right, well.

[Damaris]

Wow. Never put that together.

[Rory]

That's. That's a really accurate.

[Julian]

I have. I had at least 15 people comment that when I posted a pick with peach.

[Mall]

Oh, here's the meme right here that the guy sent me.

[Rory]

You are gay and being gay is okay.

[Mall]

Send this to someone who is gay.

[Rory]

So they send it to you to send to me.

[Mall]

Yeah, he's like, yo, send this to Julian for me. I said, all right, great.

[Rory]

I'm sure, yeah, this on the podcast will just embolden me.

[Mall]

I forgot to send it to you. My bad.

[Damaris]

With that said, Julian, where's the weirdest place that you suck dick?

[Rory]

All right. I don't ask for any edits ever. Never. No. Weirdest place I've had sex was. I think I've mentioned this before. You know that really cool aquarium at Atlantis? Yeah, yeah, yeah. This joint with the underground tunnel, this.

[Damaris]

Thing, the water slide.

[Rory]

No, no, no. This is a. This is an aquarium. This is the. It's all over.

[Julian]

That would be Rory's dream. You know, he loves aquarium.

[Rory]

It runs through the whole hotel, so it looks like this throughout. But at night, it's 24 7, because it's in the hotel. So there's this. They put on these night lights and this whole, like, ton of lights up. And it's really cool as I. In here.

[Damaris]

Where, though?

[Rory]

Oh, just like, in this hallway.

[Mall]

Like, it wasn't the same question.

[Damaris]

Anyone around y'all when y'all were doing.

[Rory]

No, because it's a private hotel. So, like, at night, the whole aquarium shut down. And then, like, yeah, there are guests there could have theoretically been guests at the hotel that walked down.

[Mall]

But, like, the private hotel is hilarious. It was a private hotel, so if I go there, I can't get.

[Rory]

But I mean, I meant the aquarium's closed to the public at night because it's in the hotel.

[Julian]

Private aquarium.

[Rory]

The private aquarium. I should have said so. Yeah. It looked more like this at night. It was pretty dimly lit. It's pretty cool. That was it. Yeah.

[Mall]

Good for you and that young lady.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Not the fish, though. Poor fish.

[Mall]

Yeah, sorry.

[Rory]

Michael Jackson's family. That one. The attorneys. Yeah. That's why I was. I couldn't fly out there. They flew me out. I was broke as.

[Julian]

Why did you break up with her?

[Rory]

I was young.

[Mall]

She's black.

[Julian]

No, she ain't black.

[Rory]

And she was not black. Do you want me to answer that?

[Damaris]

Damn.

[Mall]

I tried to. Tried to save you, man.

[Rory]

I gotta lie.

[Mall]

I tried to save you. All right.

[Julian]

You should hit her. You should swing back, circle the block.

[Rory]

Nah, I can't.

[Julian]

Vitilago you it up that bad?

[Rory]

No, it's just not.

[Damaris]

She was with the.

[Mall]

Jack a moment.

[Damaris]

Rory, I'm having a rough day, man.

[Rory]

You answer the question.

[Damaris]

The. I wouldn't say the weirdest, but one of the wilder things I've done. I went with a chick while she was looking for apartments and we asked the guy, like, hey, we're just gonna, like, take photos and, like, whatever. Like, give us a minute. And we in an apartment that was for rent on. On a tour.

[Mall]

They say female realtors are some of the biggest freaks.

[Rory]

No, but it wasn't.

[Damaris]

No, it wasn't. I was going with a chick that was looking at him.

[Mall]

I know, but I'm saying they say women that are realtors because they have keys and access to so many empty homes and condos. They get that awful lot. What guys did they date?

[Damaris]

Sluts.

[Rory]

It's kind of dope.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

By you, Ma?

[Damaris]

You don't think the 6 train was.

[Mall]

It was the D train.

[Rory]

Hey.

[Damaris]

You'Re sick of the New York State Fair?

[Mall]

You at a state fair in Syracuse?

[Julian]

New York State Fair. It happens in Syracuse.

[Rory]

But like, where on the fairground?

[Damaris]

Actually, I. At Dorney Park. So I'm with you.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Oh, that's. That's regular.

[Julian]

I was in. In the back. They have like an expedition center and it was. They have like a bunch of, like, dinosaur expeditions. Like, they do different, like different shows and stuff. And it was in the bathroom. Bathroom. Those are my ex. We couldn't wait. It's a very big fairground, you know, hard. So the New York State Fair, if you're not from upstate and you've never been, in order to get out of that fair, like, if you parked in order to get out, like, it's like a 20 minute process. And I just didn't feel like waiting, so.

[Mall]

You couldn't wait 20 minutes?

[Julian]

Nah.

[Damaris]

Neither could you.

[Mall]

Yeah, it's 45. She couldn't wait.

[Julian]

It was the male. The men's bathroom too, so that was pretty gross. Yeah, I know.

[Mall]

Well, the women's then. We ain't gonna do that because women's bathrooms too.

[Rory]

Way worse.

[Mall]

Yeah, y'all be having some.

[Julian]

Yeah, women's bathrooms are pretty disgusting.

[Rory]

What do you do with all that toilet paper?

[Julian]

Because women just pee on the seats. It's just like, why. Why do you all feel the need to squat and you don't know how to squat? You're just peeing on the seat. Please stop.

[Damaris]

Actually, I wanna. I'm sorry, Ma. I gotta head on the Peter pan bus to D.C. see, it's so. In my defense, though, in my defense, what's the version of red eye for the bus?

[Julian]

Oh, it was like the late night.

[Damaris]

It was that midnight. Yeah, it was going to, I think, the first DC Palooza ever. It was weird because, like, Cam was behind me and Austin was in front of me.

[Rory]

That nice.

[Damaris]

Everyone's asleep though. So I'm not as sick as mall. It was dark and everyone was asleep.

[Julian]

You know them buses always smell like. Because the bathroom is right there. Like I can never just on the Peter Pan Greyhound bus. They always smell like. I don't know how you. How she your mouth was able to stay closed. Her mouth was open which means she was smelling everything including them seats.

[Mall]

And she's gangster though.

[Damaris]

Facts.

[Mall]

Id. You're a liar. But it we. We have fun with your. With your voicemail. But don't call in with these lies man. Give us some real to talk about out.

[Damaris]

Do you know where the woman that gave you head on the train is right now?

[Rory]

Yeah, on the train.

[Mall]

Yeah. No, no, she's not on the train but she. We still cool. Like we still speak every now and then. Like not often, like every five, six months. Might you say hello text message or something like that. But she's like, you know, in a relationship. Moved out of New York like you know, one of those type of things. But we knew. Yeah we knew.

[Damaris]

After you give head on the train, you gotta move out of New York.

[Mall]

Yeah. You gotta get the out of here. Yeah. Yeah.

[Damaris]

You can't can't go to a new city and rebuild.

[Mall]

Yeah. Rebrand yourself. You got to rebrand yourself in another city.

[Damaris]

And listen, this goes back to our original point. You don't want to know your girl's past. Your girl could have sucked dick on the train. It's better you just don't know. Cuz I'm sure that man is so happy in his relationship right now. And you found out that she sucked mall's dick on the 6 train. It would be weird.

[Mall]

Yeah, that would suck. Yeah, that's bad because like what are.

[Damaris]

You going to do at this point?

[Julian]

Yeah, I wouldn't fuck her.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

The on the train.

[Mall]

Yeah, it man.

[Rory]

We all got a pass and it has two bad places.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Well you know, prayers to everyone involved.

[Mall]

Yeah, prayers to everyone. You know. Happy, happy, happy life. To everyone.

[Rory]

Shout out to women.

[Mall]

Shout out to women. Shout out to Kyrie Irving too. Dallas Mavericks up. No, because I'm, I'm happy for Kyrie, man. Because they the NBA really tried their best to get Kyrie the out of here a few years ago. You know, they had some, some, some wild things to say about him all coming off to him not wanting to get vaccinated thing and then his whole, you know, him posting documentary when he was here in Brooklyn about you know, he was trying to talk down on the Jews and all of that. Everything they tried to build up against him to kind of put him in a negative light. I think he carried himself really well through all of that, and he continued to be who he is, unapologetically. He continued to play and beat a great athlete, the great ballplayer that he is. And to now be a one game, well, one win away from going back to the NBA Finals to play for another championship, I think is the best way to kind of respond to all of that shit. Him not being named to the USA Olympic team this summer, which to me was. I. I laughed as soon as that the roster came out and he wasn't on it because we knew what that was. It was. You know, they didn't want that type of energy representing America. Then. You don't know what Kyrie's gonna say during media day when they go over there. They, you know, they was kind of scared of all of that. They didn't.

[Damaris]

We can't fund Israel with our tax dollars. And if Kyrie have USA on his.

[Mall]

Exactly. So I just think that is just.

[Damaris]

Sometimes Kanye's right.

[Rory]

Right?

[Mall]

Yeah. That's all. But I think that is just dope, the way that Kyrie handled himself and has continued to do what he does best, which is play basketball at a very high level. And so shout out to. Shout out to Kyrie Shout out to the Dallas Mavericks I'm rooting for them to win it all. And because Sham, God is. Is a. Is a coach with the Mavericks, and you know, that's Harlem. So I want Sham to. Sham to get a ring as well. So shout out to the Mavericks Shout out to Kyrie Irvin and yeah, this is looking like Boston Dallas, man.

[Damaris]

You want to see him bring. Bring back the ring to Harlem, Sham.

[Mall]

Oh, that would be fly for Sham to get. That's like. That's like, you know, you don't. He's not playing. But for Sham to get a NBA championship ring, I think is super ill. So I'm rooting for Dallas to win it all this year, but they still gotta handle business. So we don't want to talk prematurely, but. But shout out to Kyrie, man. I just love the way he's been able to handle himself coming out of all of that shit over the last few years that the NBA tried to put on his jacket. So I'm rooting for him.

[Damaris]

Hopefully it works out, whoever they are.

[Mall]

What does that even mean?

[Rory]

You guys been keeping up with the wnba?

[Damaris]

The only monologue they took off Saturday Night Live in history.

[Mall]

Oh, yeah. Yeah, Got you. I haven't been keeping up with the wnba. I haven't seen Caitlyn Clark play yet.

[Damaris]

So you hate women?

[Mall]

No, I love women, but I just haven't tuned into. It's still NBA playoffs right now, so that's kind of the focal point right now. But I did see. I did see this clip of Caitlin Clark getting fouled.

[Rory]

Angel Reese.

[Mall]

Well, I mean, excuse me. Angel Reese. They look alike.

[Rory]

I know.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I see.

[Mall]

Can't tell.

[Rory]

Classic mix up.

[Mall]

Can't say Caitlyn without Angel. I get it. But I did see this clip of Angel Reese getting fouled hard. And I loved her response to it, though. Her response to it was, you know, that's who Angel Reese is. She's classy, she's a tough player. But her response to this foul, which, you know, I get it, she fell hard, but it wasn't like, first of all, these two are friends in real life. They. They play.

[Julian]

I don't know about them being friends, but I think they are. They have a relationship. I wouldn't say friends.

[Mall]

Well, they play. They've known each other for years. They play ball with each other for years. Okay. I'm assuming they're friends, but the foul wasn't even that crazy.

[Julian]

She clotheslined her.

[Mall]

She didn't close. She.

[Rory]

Yes, she wrapped her hand around her throat. Look at it.

[Julian]

She clotheslined girl.

[Mall]

She did. That's not a clothesline. See, I just.

[Rory]

It's not. But she wrapped her hand around her throat and pushed down.

[Mall]

She didn't.

[Damaris]

Yeah, it's like she ran into a clothesline, like.

[Julian]

Exactly.

[Rory]

Same effect.

[Mall]

Yeah, but it wasn't a clothesline. Like.

[Damaris]

Yeah, clothes weren't clipped to the line.

[Mall]

No.

[Damaris]

Still, it wasn't.

[Mall]

She wasn't clothesline. But it was a. It was a. It was a foul. Well, she got ejected, so I don't think. I don't think she should have been ejected for that. But whatever. It is what it is. But I loved Angel Reese's response. That's the important, important thing here. Her response was.

[Damaris]

What was it? I didn't even.

[Julian]

She's like, they're not going to take it easy on me because she said.

[Mall]

Yeah, I'm a rookie. You know, she welcomed me. She's welcomed me to the league. They're not going to take it easy on me. All right, cool. I thank her for that because got up and, you know, I played harder and, you know, so that's. To me, that's the dope part about that whole situation is Angel Reese the way she's handling it. Her response to it, it wasn't anything negative. You know, she took it, and she. She. She let it push her to play harder and be more aggressive and. And I think they ended up winning that game, so.

[Julian]

No, they lost.

[Damaris]

They lost by.

[Julian]

Not by like, maybe three points.

[Mall]

Oh, okay.

[Julian]

Yeah, they was calling Alyssa Draymonda Green.

[Mall]

That's funny, Yo.

[Damaris]

I saw, like, a whole montage of all of his. Draymond's a piece of.

[Mall]

Why you say that?

[Rory]

The fighting tape.

[Damaris]

I think it was just because I watched it all, like, clips over the years in one minute thing.

[Mall]

But, like, you don't have context. You don't have. You know what I mean? You can't do that. You can't watch a compilation of my worst moments in my career.

[Damaris]

Agreed. For sure. But watching the ones on the court and then the footage that I'd already seen him snuffing dude at practice.

[Mall]

He'S.

[Damaris]

Kind of a piece of, man.

[Rory]

The fact that a fight compilation exists should tell you all you really need to know.

[Damaris]

Well, he did some. It's the same way. I felt like Embiid should have been thrown out of the whole series. Like, some stuff is not really aggressive play like you doing at this point, like, almost coward in some regards.

[Mall]

Well, Draymond is definitely, you know, he's a. He's from that Rasheed Wallace cloth. He's from that. He's, you know, he's gonna. He's gonna. He's gonna be aggressive. He's gonna do things that's not basketball plays and hope that the ref doesn't see all of it. Sometimes the ref catches some of it, sometimes they don't. But I don't think Draymond the person is a. Is a bad person. I think, as a player, I think that he's. He's just aggressive, and, you know, that's just his. That's his personality on the court.

[Rory]

Right.

[Mall]

I'm not mad at it, though, man. I think it's necessary for that team. Like, they. The warriors need. Need. They need that Draymond personality. They need that energy. They need a guy like that. Yeah. See that type.

[Rory]

They need that choked up.

[Damaris]

Oh, no, that. No, that is fine with me. Yeah, I'm fine with that.

[Rory]

Like, go bearing a headlock.

[Mall]

Yeah. You need a guy like that.

[Damaris]

Yeah, no, I'm fine with all of that.

[Mall]

If I'm in. If I'm on a bench, I'm like, we need that this summer. We need a. Like that. Yeah, go in there, choke somebody.

[Damaris]

Rough week for him.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Yo, that spin was so crazy.

[Rory]

Is God, like.

[Damaris]

To me. That's.

[Mall]

Yeah, that's. That's.

[Damaris]

That's.

[Mall]

That's probably. To me, that might be the worst of his career. That.

[Damaris]

That play on Nurkic snuffing your. Your teammate at practice, I think is kind of up there, too.

[Mall]

Well, what did he say?

[Julian]

Did he earn the snuff?

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mall]

Sometimes you got to take it back. What did he say?

[Damaris]

Are you victim blaming?

[Mall]

No, I'm just saying. What. I just want to know what he said, that's all.

[Damaris]

What was.

[Mall]

Tell me what. Tell me what was he wearing? What jersey did he have?

[Rory]

The same thing you're wearing.

[Mall]

What was he. What was he wearing? How much did he have to drink?

[Damaris]

That was a different type of punch, though, in practice.

[Mall]

Yeah, but, you know, sometimes somebody say something. Man, listen, I don't care whether we practice or not. You gotta get punched in your face.

[Damaris]

You're the same guy that said we should pull off while my girl is sucking dick at a red light.

[Mall]

Well, you already knew she was. She was cheating on you, so. So, you know, I already know.

[Damaris]

That's my teammate.

[Julian]

Yeah, but him, Yo.

[Mall]

Yeah, Sometimes your teammate need to get punched in the face. It's all good.

[Damaris]

This is crazy. More.

[Mall]

What was he saying? What was Jordan Poole saying? We still don't know what he said. That's all I'm saying. And if you push me first and if you put your hands on me.

[Damaris]

First, I get it.

[Rory]

Yeah, Draymond threw his weight behind that punch. Yeah, he jumped into it.

[Mall]

Now. Now it's a fight when you put your hands on me. So the fact that you stood there and act like I wasn't gonna swing, that's your fault.

[Damaris]

Shout out to Pool. Cause I know that that punch would.

[Rory]

Have put me sleep.

[Damaris]

Clean out.

[Rory]

I mean, he did fall.

[Damaris]

He fell when Draymond, like, went into the punch after.

[Rory]

Watch his legs.

[Mall]

Yeah, he turned his computer off.

[Rory]

Those knees were going forward.

[Mall]

Yeah, he actually.

[Damaris]

Never mind. Draymond actually kind of held him up.

[Mall]

Yeah, he did.

[Rory]

He did. Because watch Jordan Pool's legs both buckled forward.

[Damaris]

Yeah, that would put me clean. I could see how crazy that punch is.

[Mall]

Nah, he unplugged for sure. He unplugged his router.

[Julian]

Before, but I'm definitely gonna use that.

[Mall]

WI fi went out. Jordan Pool's WI fi. Definitely. For sure. All right, man. Well, happy Memorial Day. Wherever y'all at.

[Damaris]

Look at the coaches sitting there like this.

[Mall]

Yeah, man, they've seen. Listen, coaches have seen it all man, that's. We just. We just saw the tape. That happens in practices.

[Damaris]

Oh, no. He put his hands on his hips, like, here we go again.

[Mall]

Yeah. This is. This is nothing. We just happen to see this clip. But this is. Fights happen in pro sports locker rooms, practices every day. I can promise you that. So we just happen to see that. But it is what it is. Happy Memorial Day. Wherever you are, wherever you're headed, wherever you're heading from, travel safely, and we'll be back in a couple days to kick it with y'all. We got some live show announcements coming up this week. Merch is now available. Newroymal.com Excuse me. Live shows next week. Announcing next week. I'm sorry. My bad. Thank you, Baby D. Next week, we will be announcing live shows. Merch is now. Now. And still available. New. New merch will be available sometime soon.

[Damaris]

But you sound like me trying to read ads right now.

[Mall]

Do I? You want me to just do that over? Fuck it.

[Damaris]

I don't know. Leave it. We keep my bullshit. Nah, let's.

[Mall]

No, we don't.

[Damaris]

We'll do it over again.

[Mall]

We don't. Keep his head.

[Damaris]

It's on a hard drive somewhere.

[Rory]

The ads would pull out if they saw Rory. If we ran those.

[Mall]

No, we would. I would start getting Tourette's ads for, like, Tourette's medicine and like that. But yes.

[Damaris]

Newroymall.com we should make a Patreon tier. When we had the lunch with Hove1, we should do a wild tier of just throwing me butchering ads just to unload it.

[Mall]

Nah. Because then they'll feel sorry for you. They might be like, oh, get some.

[Damaris]

They didn't feel sorry for Floyd Mayweather when Breakfast Club leaked him trying to read ads. We all laughed at him.

[Mall]

We already knew that.

[Rory]

Give a Harry Potter book.

[Damaris]

But I talk to Jimmy Kimmel. You could read Cat in the Hat.

[Mall]

New Rory and Mall dot com. Everything available there. Get what you need to get.

[Rory]

Man.

[Mall]

Bye, IT man. We out. We'll talk to y'all later. Be safe. Be blessed. I'm that nigga. He's just ginger. Peace. New warrior mouth.