Episode 288 | The Edible Episode

Summary

Podcast Summary: New Rory & MAL – Episode 288 | The Edible Episode

Release Date: July 26, 2024

In Episode 288 of New Rory & MAL, titled "The Edible Episode," hosts Rory and Mal delve into a variety of engaging and humorous topics, ranging from personal grooming tales and clubbing habits to discussions about the Olympics, modern music trends, and relationship advice. This episode offers listeners a blend of candid conversations, insightful commentary, and lighthearted banter, all peppered with memorable quotes and timestamps for easy reference.

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1. Beard Shaving Stories and Personal Appearances

The episode kicks off with a lively discussion about personal grooming, specifically focusing on Julian's experience with shaving his beard for a photoshoot. The hosts share anecdotes about the emotional and physical challenges of altering one's appearance.

• Julian’s Shaving Experience:

  • Julian recounts: "I was shaving from 10am until 6pm... I looked like Freddie Mercury without the AIDS" (02:18).

• Reaction to Shaving:

  • Mal adds: "He's a biker. Yeah." (02:23)
  • The group humorously debates the necessity and impact of facial hair on personal and professional life.

2. The Impact of Edibles: Gummies and Their Effects

Rory introduces the episode's central theme by sharing his experience with gummies, leading to a candid conversation about the effects of edibles on their podcast recording.

• Rory’s Edible Intake:

  • Rory admits: "I took the focus one and I'm really unfocused... I'm built for the gummies" (07:12).

• Hosts’ Reactions:

  • Mal requests: "Damaris. Give me one, please." (07:15)
  • The trio navigates the challenges of maintaining coherence while under the influence, adding humor and relatability to the discussion.

3. Clubbing and Beverage Choices

Transitioning from their edible experiences, Rory and Mal delve into their preferences for beverages in club settings, debating the merits of ordering red wine versus other alcoholic drinks.

• Ordering Wine in Clubs:

  • Rory jokes: "I don't stick my nose up to you Ciroc drinkers." (11:32)
  • Mal comments: "I'm not doing that." (11:05)

• Discussion Points:

  • The hosts explore the social perceptions of ordering wine in clubs, the practicality of different drinks, and the associated costs.

4. City Transportation: Bikes, Scooters, and Hoverboards

The conversation shifts to urban transportation, where the hosts critique the proliferation of bikes, scooters, and hoverboards in New York City, emphasizing safety and practicality.

• Critique of City Bikes and Scooters:

  • Mal states: "It's insane. We have to. It's just..." (14:43)
  • Julian adds: "I want a scooter so bad..." (15:09)

• Personal Preferences:

  • The hosts share their experiences and frustrations with navigating crowded city streets on various personal transportation devices.

5. Fashion Trends and Underwear Discussions

A humorous segment ensues as Rory and Mal discuss the trend inspired by Rihanna of matching shoes to panties, seamlessly transitioning into a broader conversation about underwear preferences and styles.

• Matching Shoes to Panties:

  • Julian quips: "I always thought no girls ever asked me... So I don't plan on saying shaved." (03:40)

• Underwear Preferences:

  • The hosts debate the merits of different underwear styles, sharing personal preferences and funny anecdotes about laundry mishaps.

6. Olympics and Flag Bearers

In a more insightful segment, Rory and Mal discuss the upcoming Olympics, highlighting notable athletes like LeBron James and Coco Gauff as flag bearers for Team USA.

• Flag Bearers Discussion:

  • Mal remarks: "This is a dope moment for LeBron to be a flag bearer." (32:10)
  • Rory questions: "Who's your top five? Dead or alive? Flag bearers." (32:50)

• Team USA’s Prospects:

  • The hosts analyze the strengths and challenges of the USA Olympic team, considering the impact of key players' participation.

7. Modern Music Trends: Eminem, Drake, and Doja Cat

A substantial portion of the episode is dedicated to dissecting current trends in the music industry, with a focus on Eminem's latest album, Drake's collaborations, and Doja Cat's artistry.

• Eminem’s New Album:

  • Julian critiques: "Pitchfork gave it a 4.8. The needle drop. Anthony gave it a 5 out of 10." (46:55)
  • Mal comments on reception: "I haven’t heard nobody posting videos to it on social media." (48:45)

• Drake’s Musical Direction:

  • Rory observes: "I think he's on some y'all. Like, I'm really about to change my career..." (44:30)
  • Mal predicts: "I think we're gonna hear a different Drake when it comes to just rapping." (44:07)

• Doja Cat’s Underrated Talent:

  • Mal praises: "I still think she’s underrated as a rapper." (58:27)
  • Julian shares personal experience: "She was spitting. It was great." (60:37)

• Overall Music Industry Insights:

  • The hosts discuss the evolving nature of music consumption, artist legacy, and the challenges contemporary artists face in shaping music trends.

8. Caller Voicemails: Relationship and Financial Advice

Throughout the episode, Rory and Mal interact with voicemails from listeners seeking advice on relationship dynamics and financial strains.

• Caller 1’s Dilemma:

  • A caller named Josh from Texas seeks guidance on discussing financial constraints with his girlfriend due to child support obligations.

• Hosts’ Advice:

  • Mal advises: "Sit your girl down and say, babe, listen, you know, things right now have changed." (65:19)
  • Rory suggests humorously: "He should just record you saying this and then play it to her." (65:22)

• Discussion Points:

  • The hosts explore the balance between honesty and discretion in relationships, the importance of communication, and the impact of financial responsibilities on personal relationships.

9. Whales and Oceanic Encounters

In a lighter, more imaginative segment, the conversation takes a whimsical turn as the hosts discuss hypothetical encounters with whales, blending humor with surreal scenarios.

• Hypothetical Whale Encounters:

  • Rory muses: "Imagine you're chilling on Broadway and an orca with legs starts running at you." (83:18)
  • Mal expresses interest: "I want to see that. But not that close." (84:32)

• Humorous Scenarios:

  • The hosts entertain funny and exaggerated situations involving whales interacting with humans, showcasing their playful chemistry.

10. Conclusion and Upcoming Shows

As the episode wraps up, Rory and Mal promote their upcoming shows in Detroit and Chicago, inviting listeners to attend and engage with them in person.

• Show Promotions:
  • Mal announces: "We will be in Detroit at the St. Andrews Hall... and August 25th, we are at the City Winery in Chicago." (86:24)
  • Final Remarks: The hosts encourage listeners to attend their shows and express gratitude for their audience's support.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Julian on Shaving: "I looked like Freddie Mercury without the AIDS." (02:18)
• Rory on Edibles: "I'm built for the gummies." (07:12)
• Mal on Club Beverages: "I'm not doing that." (11:05)
• Rory on Heathrow's Impact: "Ironically, we are very trusting as a society that we just allow people with no experience that here's a bike." (14:41)
• Mal on Olympic Flag Bearers: "This is a dope moment for LeBron to be a flag bearer." (32:10)
• Mal on Eminem’s Album: "I have not heard any of the music anywhere." (48:45)
• Julian on Doja Cat: "I saw her right when the Moo song came out...she was spitting. It was great." (60:37)
• Mal on Relationship Advice: "Sit your girl down and say, babe, listen, you know, things right now have changed." (65:19)
• Rory on Whale Encounters: "Imagine you're chilling on Broadway and an orca with legs starts running at you." (83:18)

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Conclusion

Episode 288 of New Rory & MAL offers a tapestry of relatable and entertaining conversations that resonate with a wide audience. From personal grooming adventures and the nuanced effects of edibles to insightful takes on sports, music, and personal relationships, Rory and Mal deliver an episode that is both entertaining and thought-provoking. Whether you're a long-time listener or new to the podcast, "The Edible Episode" provides a comprehensive and engaging listen that captures the essence of what makes New Rory & MAL a favorite among comedy podcast enthusiasts.

Transcript

[Rory]

With gloves is insane. Well, like, it's not in like, some doctor cosplay porno.

[Mal]

What kind of gloves, though?

[Julian]

Like, black wide receiver gloves.

[Mal]

Yeah, like boxing gloves.

[Rory]

Chicken boxing gloves would be the funniest.

[Mal]

You keep it like this. He's just hitting it with the Saudi.

[Rory]

Getting behind it. You shadow boxing behind her.

[Mal]

No warrior now. I was gonna clean my room until I got high. I was gonna get up and find the broom, but then I got high. My room is still messed up. And I know why. Why, man?

[Rory]

Silly boy. Was that fun. How crazy was that Philly show last night? We're not pre recording this episode. Listen, I'm so Philly that one time when the whole thing happened during the.

[Mal]

Show, that one girl crazy.

[Julian]

Mal throated a cheesesteak.

[Mal]

First of all. See, you see how there's always got to be one in the room that just.

[Rory]

And his comments are a little weirder now, judging by his face. Like, they're not as funny anymore. They're a little bit more up.

[Julian]

How.

[Rory]

Because, like, you might mean it.

[Julian]

What?

[Rory]

You look like you touched me in 1995.

[Mal]

That's wild.

[Rory]

He doesn't look like a pedophile now.

[Mal]

It's. Yeah. That's only because we've seen the bed for so long.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Mal]

So for now for it to be, like, completely gone.

[Julian]

Yeah. It's weird. I'm not gonna lie.

[Mal]

You didn't cry a little bit though, like. Or you didn't, like, feel hurt just a little bit?

[Rory]

Like, just rip the mic up.

[Julian]

I told the. The production crew that I was like, I'm not going to cry. But I was like, this is an emotional thing. And the fact that there's like, you know, a full crew camera, like, just a lot happening in the room where I'm.

[Mal]

Couldn't really be emotional too.

[Julian]

I wouldn't cry regardless.

[Mal]

You felt some type of way. Yeah.

[Julian]

I was like, but this is like a big deal. And they're like, no, we get it. Because, you know, they're a beard company. They deal with hair all the time. Like. Yeah, it's like, you know, you've been growing something that's been a part of you for so long. I was like, plus, I'm shaving a beard on camera. So you only get, like, one shot at it.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Like, I was shaving from 10am until 6pm we did multiple things throughout.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

But there's only one shot to get, like, certain, you know, goes at it. And I was like, you guys better get the right shot.

[Rory]

So that's what you told the director.

[Julian]

That's.

[Rory]

Yes, I'm sure that went great.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Well, you got. You like to let your face breathe now a little bit.

[Julian]

Molly would have loved the one joke. We might have to cut this. We were doing different phases. I had like a what a goatee. And then from there I did a mustache where I looked like just your like Hitler Uber driver. Well they said like after the mustache there's no, there's nowhere left to go. You can take it off. And I just gave one big like whoop and I was like, if I just do the other side and just let it rock for like a half a second footage. In the middle of that, when I was thinking to myself and laughing in my head is when I nicked my lip and cut my lip and I was like, that's probably just instant.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Karma from.

[Rory]

From the man himself.

[Mal]

Yeah, I'll teach you.

[Rory]

Is your dating app profiles have your beard for the most part with photos.

[Julian]

You know it's funny, after I did this shoot, I looked back on my stuff and I was like, cuz it's a mix. There's some photos where I'm, I'm. It's shorter and others where it's longer. And I always thought no woman has ever or like no girls ever asked me like hey like what. What's your beard situation look like beforehand? So. So hasn't gotten me in, you know, any situation in the past. So I don't plan on saying shaved.

[Rory]

Like not doing that for my own amusement. Can you just put like just beard photos and then. And then pull up, swipe right tonight and like go on a date and I'll just sit at a table like two tables down. Cause I just want to see what her reaction would be.

[Julian]

Like that would be funny. They also had to. There was a kiddie pool scene. I stood like in a, in a shower. Well, there was a scene.

[Rory]

These guys get into Hollywood, first thing they do.

[Julian]

Yeah, I woke up with a sore lower back. No, it was like because it was in a real studio. So they have the makeshift bathroom, makeshift shower, and there's a kiddie pool that I'm standing in. And there's a shower scene because I'm shaving. I had to shave my chest, which I wasn't thrilled about. I was like, I don't now I look like a 12 year old boy. Yeah, like it's weird.

[Rory]

So was this your humiliation ritual? Is this to get you in into the naughty?

[Julian]

No, they were very professional. It was, it was actually a good time. A lot of podcast Fans. Not of this podcast, but just, like, comedy podcast fans. So we just swapped, you know, a.

[Rory]

Lot of podcast fans. Not this pod, not this one, but a lot of podcasts.

[Julian]

The whole crew was white. So, you know, they're like, you know.

[Rory]

A lot of people. Fans of listening to things.

[Mal]

Not this one.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Your lips look so different. I'm over here, like, staring at you. I feel like a cat that's like coming home to a new owner, and you just look different. Like, it's weird. Like, I feel estranged from you. Like, I don't. Like, I don't know.

[Mal]

My boy had a bed, like, crazy long. Like, I don't even. It's. It was obnoxiously long, and he shaved it completely, like, bald face. And he went to pick up his son from daycare, and when his son turned around and looked at him, he started crying.

[Rory]

So I don't remember this, but this story has been told to me at every family function. My mom loves to tell this. She got her. She cut her hair and went to pick me up at daycare, and I refused to go with her for hours. Refused to get in the car. Like, sat there, would not budge. That's not my mom. I'm not getting in that car. Nice fucking try.

[Mal]

That's funny, though. Yeah.

[Rory]

I've been. Been this way for quite some time.

[Mal]

Well, it's all right, Julie, you know, let you let your face breathe a little bit. You know, hot out, humid out. Yeah.

[Julian]

I mean, your hair be bad.

[Mal]

It'll be back in no time.

[Julian]

I don't know how long I want to go. Moving forward. I got my first compliment from my agent after I sent her these photos. She really liked them, and I was like, oh, that's all it takes is just shave my face.

[Mal]

Oh, so you can.

[Rory]

Your agent, or. What do you mean?

[Julian]

Well, she just wasn't a fan of the beard. This was my favorite phase from the shoot. The. Right.

[Mal]

You look like you was trying to hide out in Germany.

[Julian]

Right.

[Mal]

Act like you were part of the gang. Gang. And you weren't.

[Rory]

Walk to some kids. You know where to find the fentanyl.

[Julian]

As soon as I did this, I was like, I look like Freddie Mercury. This is.

[Rory]

Rest in peace.

[Julian]

Yeah, Freddie Mercury without the aids. That. And then this is. This is like, the homoerotic chest shave portion.

[Rory]

I don't want to see what is.

[Julian]

Yeah, that was a part of the shoot.

[Rory]

Make sure that's blurred.

[Damaris]

We didn't have to see it.

[Mal]

Yeah, we didn't have to see that part.

[Julian]

But, yeah, it Was fun. It was cool. This will come out at some point. It's for Conair. And some point in August. Probably a week or two into August. So keep an eye out.

[Rory]

Check your local listings.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

If you're in the market for a new trimmer that works.

[Mal]

It works. It definitely's gone.

[Rory]

So I may or may not have taken a gummy before this podcast.

[Mal]

Yes.

[Julian]

Really.

[Rory]

And I'm already feeling it.

[Mal]

Damaris. Give me one, please.

[Damaris]

I got you.

[Rory]

Please give me gummy me?

[Mal]

Yes. I want to not feel my feet in 17 minutes.

[Rory]

I will say. And this is not an ad. I. I'm not built for the gummies.

[Julian]

Why you're gonna be.

[Rory]

I don't have the tolerance.

[Mal]

Which one you have.

[Rory]

I took the focus one and I'm really unfocused, so I have no. I feel amazing.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. You feel so.

[Rory]

Everything feel really good.

[Mal]

You're focused.

[Rory]

I'm focused on not dying. But we're recording episodes. I didn't think because I have no tolerance to THC or weed.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

So this hits me a little different. The way alcohol hits you.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Is how weed hits me.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

And I am ever cleared out right now.

[Mal]

Half a glass of wine. A woman. She could take me straight home. I put up no fight after.

[Rory]

Whatever with you have her way.

[Mal]

Oh, man. Half a glass and I'm just no good after that.

[Rory]

Julian still has himself up on the.

[Julian]

Do you like the goatee? I found the goatee.

[Mal]

I thought you was about to feed me like a little baby bird. Baby D Like communion. Okay, sexy red, I see you now. All right. Don't hurt nobody.

[Rory]

Wait, so, Damaris, is this the D.C. hair? And we're back. Sorry, I'm still. The gummy's still kicking in a little.

[Mal]

Bit or just minor. Minor hiccup.

[Rory]

Yeah. Technical difficulties. But I'm here. I exist. How's everyone feeling? It's been, what, two days, three days?

[Mal]

No, I saw you yesterday and the day before that and last night.

[Rory]

It's been a minute, man. I missed you.

[Mal]

No, it's not. Yeah, literally. Literally been 17 minutes since the last time I saw you.

[Rory]

Well, yes. We are back now. We're not in Philly. I'm off a gummy. So I'm gonna do my best to participate in this here episode, man.

[Mal]

I'm here to walk me through. Just keep listening to my voice.

[Rory]

Made a mistake, man.

[Mal]

No, it's okay. I should have done it after the episode, man.

[Rory]

It said focus.

[Mal]

Okay, I got you. I got you. This is. This is. This is the time where you should trust your partner. All right, I got you.

[Rory]

Cool.

[Mal]

Your therapist will say, trust your partner, right? No, no, your therapist doesn't say that. You gotta get your money back. Gotta get it back. Well, we're back. Julian, good to see you. Look at Sexy Red over there. I'll tell you what. I'll tell you one thing.

[Damaris]

Why are you like this?

[Mal]

What?

[Damaris]

Why are you like.

[Mal]

You look. You look good. I'm just saying you look good, Baby D. That's all I'm saying. You look. You look great.

[Damaris]

So both of y'all are off gummies.

[Mal]

This episode, but mine ain't really kicking.

[Rory]

You look like a Fonta Girl.

[Mal]

Yeah, you look great.

[Julian]

Don't you wanna.

[Mal]

You look like a great. Like, I'm going to a great brunch, and you're sitting there waiting for your girls to show up, and I just send you a bottle of your favorite wine and just leave you alone for the rest of the night.

[Rory]

Little Sutter Home.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's all I do. Send the cinnamon wine. Cinnamon wine to the pretty lady with the wine.

[Damaris]

Send me Sutter Home and I'll bust you upside your head with a bottle.

[Mal]

What's wrong with Sutter Home?

[Rory]

Sutter Home at the club is like $80.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but if you're saying the fact that knows that. The fact that Rory knows the price of Sutter Home at the club.

[Rory]

Well, typically a stereotypical club, they don't have good wine. They have shitty wine that they overcharge. So, yeah, they'll sell, like, a barefoot bottle. That was $60.

[Mal]

That was one of the main reasons why I stopped clubbing years ago is because once I stopped drinking, I was like, well, I only drink wine if I go to the club. I can't order a bottle of wine to the table like you can.

[Rory]

It's just gonna be shitty wine. Yeah.

[Mal]

Like, you know, but who wants to drink shitty wine? You have a crazy headache.

[Damaris]

Who wants that drink wine at the.

[Mal]

Club other than I do? Like, what's wrong with that? What's wrong with what's wrong? If you see a guy at a table and he orders a bottle of red wine, like, what's wrong with that? That's not. That's not.

[Damaris]

I gotta be drinking, like, wine in the club is super crazy.

[Julian]

That's. That's a dangerous game. That's wild red wine. That's just one walking stain.

[Mal]

I'm a walking stain.

[Damaris]

That's like someone old fashioned.

[Julian]

Well, yeah, you'll bump some. Yeah, you're gonna. That's. Yes. What do you guys think if I.

[Mal]

Bump somebody and they drinking something with cranberry? It's the same. I don't care.

[Rory]

Nah, red wine's a little.

[Julian]

Red wine is way worse, but who cares?

[Damaris]

Cranberry, you gonna have like a little light pink.

[Mal]

And I'm not walking around a club with a glass of wine.

[Rory]

Like, they're just holding it up.

[Mal]

Yeah, I'm not doing that.

[Damaris]

I'm with the bathroom with the glasses.

[Mal]

I'm definitely not doing that.

[Julian]

Sleepy wine, though.

[Damaris]

That's what I. That's what I was saying. It's either a sleepy wine.

[Mal]

As soon as I leave here. As soon as I leave here, I'm going home to shower and sleep. Yes. So while I'm here from 12 to 1:32 o'clock, I would like to drink a couple glasses of red wine and leave.

[Rory]

Well, I'll just.

[Julian]

Red wine over.

[Rory]

Like, I'm not like those other guys. That's what you try to do at the club.

[Mal]

I just drink wine.

[Rory]

I don't stick my nose up to you Ciroc drinkers.

[Julian]

I just don't drink tequila drinkers.

[Mal]

I don't drink vodka. I don't drink cognac. It's like, can I get a bottle of red. Red wine and chill with the homies? Like, we just kick it for a few hours.

[Damaris]

No, my favorite, I don't think, is when we force you to take like, a tequila shot for, like, someone's birthday.

[Julian]

My shot face is hilarious because I.

[Mal]

Don'T know how you drink that shit. That's like poison.

[Rory]

Yeah. No, it is.

[Mal]

Like, why?

[Julian]

That's the point.

[Rory]

We doing, like, alcohol poisoning when you have too much of the poison and you od.

[Mal]

But people actually.

[Rory]

That's like the definition of it.

[Mal]

But people actually, like, love to take shot. I was watching baddies. You know, I'm watching. I'm a baddies. I'm a baddie now.

[Rory]

I'd love to see how these two things connect.

[Mal]

Yo, I'm watching it. And they had got on the flight to go, I guess, the Dominican Republic or something. You could tell it was early in the morning. Girls were still yawning, you know, just.

[Julian]

Woke up, it's three in the afternoon.

[Mal]

And here come Natalie nuts. Let's take a shot. I'm like, it can't be. No, it's no later than 11 in the morning. How are y'all taking shots at 11am.

[Rory]

Damaris and I have a friend like that.

[Mal]

11Am Taking a shot. Nah, bro, we gotta have a talk. We gotta talk. We gotta have what y'all going through. There's no way you taking shots at 11 in the morning.

[Julian]

I took a bunch of shots.

[Mal]

It's not vacation. I don't want to hear about vacation.

[Damaris]

I have to do that every time we're in la. When we you guys last LA show, I had been drinking since 11 in the morning.

[Rory]

That's because you were with that friend.

[Julian]

That friend was there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember.

[Rory]

There's a common denominator in that whole thing. You've been to LA and not drank at 11am but you were without that person.

[Mal]

It's okay for us to notice that our friends are going through something and are crying out for help.

[Rory]

Yeah, sure.

[Mal]

If any of my friends say, yo, let's take a shot and it's 11 in the morning, I'm gonna take him to the side by. What you going through? Seriously, like, what are you going through? What happened?

[Julian]

I took a bunch of shrooms on Saturday night. It was a lot of fun.

[Rory]

Are you still on them?

[Julian]

No, I wish I was. I honestly, I took a really long break from shrooms because. Not that I was like going overboard, it's just. They just. Just too much. And I took some for the first time in a while and it was so fucking fun. I was up till like 8am because I ended up taking like more pretty late in the. In the evening. And I city biked from Brooklyn home with my friend. It was so funny. We were so funny.

[Rory]

Eric Adams needs to crack down on his city.

[Julian]

It was so.

[Rory]

We got kids on shrooms on city bikes, around pedestrians. Yeah, lock them up.

[Mal]

We need to get rid of all them damn city bikes.

[Julian]

No, they're incredible.

[Mal]

No, they're not.

[Damaris]

They're incredible.

[Mal]

They not.

[Rory]

They think the fast ones, they think.

[Mal]

That they have the same rights as drivers.

[Julian]

We have better rides.

[Mal]

Yeah, I'm tired of them, like, get the. Get out the way.

[Rory]

Yeah. And the city bikers aren't advanced bikers. I am like the guy that has like the whole get up and the tights and the whole thing, like, understands.

[Mal]

He's a biker. Yeah.

[Rory]

And he understands.

[Mal]

He knows how to the rules of the road. I'm talking about the casual person that's just trying to get to their next meeting in Slack across town. And they have a whole suit on on the bike and they just like, yo, I don't want.

[Julian]

Oh, yeah, no, that's scary.

[Mal]

It's like, bro, get out the wave. You can't even stop you falling when you got to slow down. You can't put your foot on the. It's like, what are you doing now? You about to fall into the lane of the car and now get hit by a car. Now nobody can move.

[Rory]

Ironically, we are very trusting as a society that we just allow people with no experience that here's a bike. If you have two bucks and just ride through midtown.

[Mal]

It's insane. We have to. It's just.

[Rory]

That's dangerous.

[Mal]

It's too many bikes in New York City now. The mopeds, the bikes, the scooters. It's just. What. What are we doing? What are we doing?

[Julian]

I really.

[Mal]

Nobody's noticing how. It's just like, you seem. Scooters and bikes everywhere.

[Julian]

I want a scooter so bad. I've always, as a kid, wanted an electric scooter. My parents never said. They never would let me get one. I've always wanted a scooter that's like my. I really want one.

[Mal]

You know, those are like super inexpensive. Like, you can get one today if you want.

[Julian]

Nah.

[Rory]

Well, it's like, especially in this neighborhood.

[Julian]

Thousand bucks.

[Mal]

No, it's not.

[Julian]

From like 500,000 electric ones the night. I'm not getting like a. Like, not the.

[Damaris]

Not the razors.

[Julian]

Yeah. I'm not getting like a kick push scooter.

[Rory]

Not the doordash ones.

[Julian]

No, no. But I really want one. That's. That's just something I've always wanted. It never happens.

[Mal]

I wanted one of those. Those Ray J scooty bikes. Yeah, I remember I wanted one of those, like, really bad.

[Rory]

I rode one around Hoboken for like three hours, but I just didn't have enough money to buy it.

[Mal]

But you had it for three hours?

[Rory]

Yeah, it was Billy and Ray J. We're at Hoboken, and let's see somebody.

[Mal]

Jump me and just took it home.

[Rory]

Go back to Ray and Billy, like in Hoboken. It was crazy.

[Mal]

They got me.

[Damaris]

Remember that era of the hover bikes? The hover.

[Rory]

Hover Hoverboards.

[Damaris]

Hoverboards, yes.

[Rory]

Oh, thank God. Those things caught on fire. They were so annoying.

[Damaris]

Oh, that is what happened. They started.

[Rory]

Yeah. They banned them from the trains everywhere. Aren't they still around even going to a bank with those things?

[Mal]

We had them one time at. We went through the airport, I think in la. We had them. We was like. When they first came out and we was like. It was. It was so gay of us. We're on hoverboards going through lax.

[Damaris]

You and Rory?

[Mal]

No. Oh, and we've been going through la.

[Rory]

I think Me and Maul was on hoverboards going through la.

[Mal]

That would have been insane.

[Julian]

That's in that TMZ clip. You guys are riding hoverboards.

[Rory]

Which TMZ clip is this? Oh, there's video footage of mall doing this.

[Mal]

No, no, absolutely not.

[Rory]

Why?

[Mal]

He could.

[Rory]

You could have been with someone high profile. I don't know. TMZ just chills at lax.

[Mal]

Definitely not. But I like the hoverboards. I'm not mad at it, but I'm glad that that did like go out, go out of style.

[Damaris]

People had them everywhere. They were in the clubs, the, the supermarket. They were everywhere.

[Rory]

We did a palooza photo shoot with one.

[Damaris]

I'm sorry, that's sick.

[Julian]

It's cool.

[Rory]

Never came out.

[Julian]

Oh, that's Mike Tyson, by the way.

[Rory]

Yeah. Oh, he didn't feel that.

[Mal]

Oh, right on his back. My back is broken.

[Damaris]

You know when you fall and you don't bounce like, you just fall like splat.

[Mal]

That means you hurt.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

You gotta take a second, gather your soul and your, your blood get to.

[Rory]

Flowing again, you know, I had no issue with the hoverboards. It was just in like small areas, public places. Like, I don't want to be waiting in line and there's someone on a hoverboard literally doing the I am legend behind me. I. I hated them.

[Julian]

What do you guys think about the. The Big Wheel? Just the one wheel that people ride.

[Mal]

I like that one.

[Julian]

Those scare the out of me.

[Rory]

But that guy's always dressed in a full suit.

[Mal]

Yeah, you have to that.

[Rory]

Yeah, you can't wear casual clothes.

[Julian]

And they wear like helmets. Cuz those things cook. Yeah, they move.

[Rory]

Are they easy to ride though?

[Damaris]

Oh, yeah.

[Rory]

They terrify me.

[Julian]

This is the one I'm talking about.

[Rory]

Yeah, those are.

[Mal]

I like those.

[Julian]

Look at that. He's flying. And yeah, you wear like a bike helmet, like a motorcycle helmet.

[Rory]

The guys in the city are like Wall street guys in full suits that I see same.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Any way to maneuver around the city.

[Damaris]

Because they're the only ones that can afford that.

[Rory]

And they're in, they're in the bike lanes. Like they're not going 45 miles an hour. Like get in the road.

[Julian]

This photo, this guy's on the FDR with those.

[Mal]

Yeah, they be on the street with those. They. Not in the B lane with those.

[Julian]

No. Yeah, they. They go.

[Rory]

FDR is crazy.

[Julian]

FDR is nuts.

[Mal]

So a video that I guess Rihanna posted of her in Manhattan.

[Rory]

Yeah. That's why I need a scooter. Because if someone tell me, Rihanna showing ass in Harlem, I'm getting right on. Right on the scoot.

[Mal]

But why we don't never. Like, as many times as I've walked that exact block.

[Rory]

Never. Never happened to you?

[Mal]

Never seen. I've probably been robbed on that block. Never seen Rihanna just standing on the block, having an impromptu photo session.

[Rory]

Stars weren't. Weren't aligned for you.

[Julian]

I would crash my city bike if I saw Rihanna do this.

[Mal]

But she almost doesn't, because New York City, obviously, we know, is a city of fashion and beautiful women. I felt like if Rihanna was walking down the street dressed like that, exactly like that, with no security, nothing, no cameras, most people, obviously some people would recognize that that's Rihanna, but most people would probably walk right past her.

[Rory]

Yeah, absolutely. Everyone's in their phones anyways.

[Mal]

Everyone's in their phones. It's New York. It's like, oh, that's Rihanna. Who cares?

[Rory]

Just like that.

[Mal]

New York is at it.

[Rory]

But not even that. I just feel like they wouldn't even recognize her. They'd just be focused on their phone in the street. And maybe one person. Is that Rihanna? Yeah.

[Mal]

Then it's.

[Rory]

Because unless you have, like, all the bodyguards and everything, it's like, it was that Rihanna.

[Mal]

Then it's like, nah, that can't be Rihanna. Like, she would have a bunch of bodyguards.

[Rory]

Your friend tells you to shut up.

[Mal]

And, yeah, she just looked like a cute. A cute girl walking down the street. But where were we at, though? Because I felt like we had a photo shoot on that same block. I feel like we walked that block at least 30 times.

[Julian]

Never seen Rihanna Damaris. So Rihanna's message here is she seems like she's shelfing the six pack till next summer, but her summer goal is matching her shoes to her panties. Are you. Are you jumping on board with this trend?

[Damaris]

You want to see?

[Julian]

I mean, I saw matching her shoes. That's what she's saying. That's what she's. Yeah, that's her message here.

[Rory]

That's the new trend now. So if you see whatever shoe she got on, that's what color the Maris.

[Julian]

Has green underwear on, according to this trend.

[Rory]

Green New balance underwear.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

She would always match the brand.

[Damaris]

She would never actually do, though, but yeah.

[Julian]

Really?

[Mal]

You have green right now with your green sneakers. You did that on purpose, or was.

[Julian]

That, like, in the name of Rihanna?

[Damaris]

Just fashion, like, you know.

[Rory]

You know, just comes to you. Comes to you. You wake up in the morning, that's what you're doing.

[Mal]

Do you try to match Your panties. You like your underwear to your. Your footwear?

[Damaris]

No, I don't. Actively thinking. Think about it. No, but it goes all together because you usually got to match the underwear in some shape or form to what you have on.

[Mal]

So I guess.

[Damaris]

So, like, you're not going to wear white drawers with black sweats. You got white drawers on right now.

[Mal]

I have on white drawers right now.

[Julian]

Really?

[Rory]

Is that something you can't do, white drawers with black pants?

[Damaris]

Well, I would. I would just think that sometimes it might show through. For example, if he had. Well, it will show. If he had.

[Rory]

If I had on white pants, black drawers would be funny.

[Damaris]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. White pants with black Marquis Houston of sweats.

[Mal]

You think I got on that my underwear was show?

[Damaris]

No, I mean, like, when you go.

[Rory]

You got a nice little yoga pant.

[Julian]

Could be linen.

[Mal]

I'm never wearing linen pants.

[Damaris]

Never? Not even.

[Rory]

You got the Russell Simmons.

[Damaris]

In Puerto Rico, you don't wear linen pants.

[Julian]

You're wearing, like, triple six cotton sweatpants.

[Damaris]

On in Puerto Rico. Swimming trunks, like, shorts, like, the entire time. Like, you didn't go to the grocery store with trunks.

[Mal]

I can't go to the grocery store with some with trunks on.

[Damaris]

Oh, I don't.

[Julian]

I don't own white under, like, white boxer briefs.

[Mal]

You don't own white boxer briefs? No, because you don't white, probably.

[Damaris]

Little skid mark over here ain't doing that.

[Mal]

He gonna take those off and there'd be a surprise in there. Little KitKat sitting in there for you.

[Julian]

No, just Halloween.

[Mal]

Little Halloween Kit Kat. The little ones. You know, the little Halloween Kit Kats. You don't want to wear white. He don't want to wear white underwear. Have a surprise. He take it off. He might be cooking up with a girl. Definitely. Whoa. Can't show those.

[Damaris]

You know, you. They bought an underwear up.

[Mal]

Nah, that's.

[Damaris]

Take your draws. The more you moment you take them off, you ball them up, throw them under the bed.

[Mal]

You can't have skid marks after a certain age. Like, come on, man, what are you doing?

[Rory]

Well, if you know you're about to hit a chick for the first time and you've been waiting for a while, like, do you put a special pair of draws on? Like, when you know you're gonna get some?

[Mal]

It's one with no commando, actually.

[Rory]

With denim.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Shorter craving. Jeans.

[Mal]

Jeans and nothing underneath. Fuck it.

[Rory]

You don't have your special drawers, like, the ones that, you know, like, I'm going out Saturday. I'm getting Some pussy. I'm aware these.

[Mal]

No, I do have the drawers that are, like. They're a little. Like, the cotton is a little more breathable, not gives you a better. I guess, like, certain polo underwear that I have is like, the cotton is a little thinner. So, like, when you're going out, you know, it kind of feels like you have on, like, Italian underwear. You know what I mean? Like, you have a nice shirt on, a nice pair of jeans feels like.

[Rory]

An Italian is wrapped around you.

[Mal]

You can't put jeans. Put Hanes on when you going out to dinner.

[Julian]

Like, I definitely can't.

[Rory]

I definitely put on Hanes to go out to.

[Mal]

Oh, no, come on, man. That's. That's.

[Julian]

I have certain underwear that I wear when I go to castings.

[Rory]

Why is that?

[Julian]

Cuz, like, during a casting, they. They pretty much not castings, fit castings. It's like they. You have to be. It's nice to meet you. And then two minutes later, you're in nothing but underwear and they're measuring you. So I don't want to pull up with, like, you know, old underwear on.

[Mal]

You should probably just throw those out.

[Damaris]

Whichever ones you thinking about.

[Julian]

When you say old, I keep. I keep the old ones around. Like it's. It's not like in case of emergency, but, like, if I'm going to play basketball or, like, go to the gym, then, like, I don't. I'll wear some raggedy. I don't care about that. I'm not like, wearing the old stuff in public for a day. Yeah, it's like, go work out, play basketball.

[Damaris]

So that's like y'all guys version of, like, period panties. I didn't know y'all had, like, period panties.

[Julian]

Oh, yeah, I got a few. Yeah, you got a few. The nice thing is when the. When the nice pair, like, the quality pairs start to wear down, then like, you kind of upgrade. Like, my. My new period panties are quite nice.

[Rory]

Because they were the. Because they were nice.

[Julian]

Yeah. Premium. And now they're.

[Rory]

Yeah, I've designer. That is, like, moved into walk to the supermarket pants.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

It's weird how that works.

[Mal]

I had a pair of underwear on one time, and I sat down and used to use the bathroom, and I noticed I had, like, holes on the side of them.

[Rory]

Oh, yeah. Ooh.

[Mal]

I said, why am I living like this?

[Damaris]

Thick ass thighs.

[Mal]

I threw them shits right in the garbage. I was like, why. Why am I living like this? Because you don't notice the hole in it. Like, when you wash and dry them.

[Damaris]

Until you put them on.

[Mal]

Till you put them on. You sitting down on the toilet, you look, you see, like, the floor through your drawers, you're like, that's it.

[Julian]

Cause that's.

[Rory]

You. Like, yo, my nuts have been exposed this entire class.

[Julian]

I don't know if it's the same for women underwear, but that's where the men. The hole in boxer briefs usually manifest.

[Damaris]

In the thought in the thigh part.

[Julian]

No, like, in the whole. Like, your balls can kind of hang through.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's not that. Like, mine's just, like, on the leg.

[Julian]

Oh, really? Mine's always, like, literally underneath. Underneath the marriage.

[Mal]

This. All right, listen, we do.

[Damaris]

We think we got. I know, because I wear boxer briefs.

[Mal]

Not thick.

[Damaris]

Okay, I'm sorry. I wear men's boxer briefs.

[Rory]

You know, the hip ratio can stretch out the bands.

[Damaris]

No, it's literally the thigh. Like, the inner part of the thigh.

[Mal]

It's like when you pull them up, you put them on, it's like.

[Rory]

Well, I mean, it's two stress points from the side of your hip to there. So it's being stretched more based off your hip ratios.

[Mal]

Stop talking about my hip.

[Rory]

When I dip, you dip. We dip.

[Mal]

No, I don't want.

[Damaris]

But your balls hanging out your drawers. You gotta. I ain't never seen it.

[Mal]

Yeah, I don't know what that is.

[Julian]

Yeah, but the pair that it happened to, I think I wore them a few days ago. They're great. I still like them. And you can't see them. So if, like, I'm say I'm with a girl or whatever, this really would be the only time anyone else would see them. Like, face. Face on. You can't see the hole.

[Damaris]

But when you turn around.

[Julian]

Why would I. I'm not turning around. I'm bending over. Like, I'm not.

[Mal]

No, but you have a hole in the enemy. You should just throw those out.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

That's what I'm talking about.

[Julian]

Then they just become basketball ones.

[Mal]

You have other ones that are basketball ones.

[Damaris]

Your draw should not have holes in them. Like, they can be loose, Julian. They could be faded. They don't need.

[Julian]

I'd rather have there be a little hole than. Than loose. Loose sucks because then that's when they start riding. And it's like you're always tugging and adjusting stomach.

[Mal]

When the last time y'all wore box, like, boxers?

[Julian]

She does. I. I don't know.

[Damaris]

I wear boxer briefs, not boxers.

[Julian]

Oh, I thought you stole boxers.

[Rory]

High school, maybe.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

Yeah, high school.

[Rory]

High school.

[Damaris]

The plaid ones.

[Mal]

I don't know. Where they was trying to take us.

[Rory]

With those maybe for freshman year of college.

[Julian]

And they would go down to, like, my knee, my front of my.

[Mal]

Like, they were so long, so disgusting. Like, it's crazy that we was really going to school.

[Julian]

So much fabric.

[Mal]

Like, think about what box. It's just the elastic on the waistband, and that's it. Curtains. Just elastic up here. Curtains. What is that? Like, who told us that was cool to. To put those on?

[Rory]

Well, you get a lot of cool designs, and I don't know.

[Julian]

Well, then there was the whole thing. If it's tight, it's gay. Yeah, that was always that. You want to get to the root of it. And when we were in middle school.

[Mal]

It was the tidy whiteies. The ones that don't have, like, no leg. It was like, the ones that are, like, the. The rest.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Like, those was, like, unacceptable.

[Rory]

I do. I went even worse. I used to wear basketball shorts under my jeans sometimes.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Oh, damn, y'all.

[Julian]

I never.

[Rory]

And then boxers under that.

[Mal]

Yeah, we was heathens. Ass stinking. Just heathens outside all day. Jeans and basketball shorts. Where are you going?

[Julian]

What was the point?

[Mal]

Excuse used to be, yo, if I spend a night in my man crib.

[Damaris]

Oh, no. What if I hoop after school?

[Rory]

If you hoop.

[Julian]

That's my question. And it was.

[Rory]

Sometimes it was cold in the morning and, like, started to warm up, and you just wanted, you know.

[Julian]

Yeah, but you had a locker.

[Rory]

Yeah, but that was like.

[Julian]

Just put them in the. No.

[Damaris]

Or long johns. Remember long johns.

[Rory]

Of course.

[Mal]

I want to say just wear some long johns. Like, basketball shorts was nasty.

[Damaris]

Do y'all still wear long johns?

[Mal]

Hell, yeah.

[Damaris]

Yeah, like, during the winter time.

[Julian]

I don't, but I should.

[Rory]

Thanks.

[Julian]

I'm on board. No, I'm not here to show you guys. It sounds like a good idea.

[Mal]

I wouldn't around the house, though. Like, that's like my. Like my pajamas. Sometimes, like, I'll put on long johns and just chill in the grip.

[Damaris]

I want one.

[Mal]

I love seeing girls in long johns.

[Rory]

Oh, you definitely slip into something more comfortable and come back out with your long time.

[Mal]

That's my. Yo, I'm gonna go change. I'll be right back.

[Rory]

Commando with the long john.

[Mal]

Just.

[Rory]

Just absolutely having to go everywhere.

[Mal]

You gotta show her the goods a little bit.

[Damaris]

Women need to bring back slips because I'm tired of these women walking around, nipples out, ass out. I could see through everything. Bring the slip back. Remember slip? Like, used to have to wear that. Well, y'all don't, but you have to wear that underneath a dress. My grandmother wouldn't let me go anywhere without a slip.

[Julian]

Yeah, it's like a wife beater, but for women.

[Rory]

I mean, they want to show nipple and ass.

[Damaris]

It's. It's kind of like a wife beater, but it's usually, like, made of satin or silk because your nipples can't poke through. Like, you can't see the color of your underwear. Like, now girls are wearing skims, which is technically boxer briefs.

[Mal]

Skims they wearing with outside. Kanye's wife is wearing see through.

[Damaris]

Nothing Left to the imagination nothing.

[Mal]

I love it. What a time to be alone.

[Julian]

Yeah, I do miss that. Like, you're spoiled. Everything's out in the open. What's the point of getting you all these drinks and talking to you for hours if I'm literally staring at your nipples?

[Rory]

Go home and beat off.

[Julian]

That should have been the surprise. Like, why are we. You're led with the nipple. It's like we just sat down and my dick is just on the chair.

[Damaris]

Like, it would. Oh, it would save us all so much time.

[Julian]

Yeah, we could just go to. Back to mine.

[Mal]

Go back to mine.

[Rory]

Okay. If we did see Rihanna, would you guys stop and watch her do her Tick tock.

[Julian]

If what you have to.

[Mal]

It's Rihanna.

[Rory]

I feel like you would have way time.

[Julian]

He just processed the video.

[Damaris]

Why would you take.

[Rory]

There was obviously a bunch of security guards and it took a while to shoot. Would you guys stop?

[Julian]

Yes.

[Rory]

Like, would you form. Okay. I didn't know if you guys too cool. Like, because that has to be weird.

[Damaris]

To do in front of a crowd. I will say, hey, you look good and keep walking.

[Julian]

You call Rihanna bitch.

[Rory]

You would just say, hey, you look good and keep walking.

[Damaris]

Like, not a but like a. Like that.

[Mal]

The marriage is lying. She's definitely trying to get a picture in the video.

[Damaris]

I'm not.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Who do y'all.

[Rory]

She'd be next to reality.

[Damaris]

There's no way y'all know me. Y'all don't know me.

[Mal]

Oh, wait, listen. We're not talking about just the average.

[Damaris]

I even more so. I'm not into Rihanna's doing something. She's working. I'm never interrupting.

[Mal]

She ain't working. She just going where she going, taking videos.

[Damaris]

The shoes she has on her feet are part of a brand that she's collaborating with. Rihanna is always working.

[Julian]

You ain't even peep.

[Mal]

She's not always. I'm just saying right there. That's not like, if you was walking down that street, you would say, she would. You spoke to her. She would speak back. There's nobody else out there.

[Rory]

That's at the Eiffel Tower. That street?

[Mal]

No, not that street.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

Why they did that to Rocky? Why they put the.

[Damaris]

No, that's her lip gloss. She's partnering with the Olympics with Paris.

[Mal]

But in the original picture, that's Rocky, not her lip.

[Damaris]

Oh, I didn't know that. That was originally Rocky.

[Rory]

These chicks are putting emojis over our faces. I'll take that.

[Mal]

Well, that's her branch. That's her product, and you promote that.

[Rory]

At least Rocky got replaced with that.

[Julian]

How's that?

[Rory]

We take a girl out and she put an emoji.

[Mal]

I want to try the Fenty. The men's underwear. I want to try them.

[Damaris]

I'll buy you some.

[Julian]

I want the skims. Men underwear.

[Mal]

Yeah, I want those two.

[Julian]

I heard that looks great.

[Mal]

Yeah, we need under. We need. I'm glad that these women brands are, like, including y'all. Yeah. Give us something to, like, you know, y'all women understand texture and feel and things. Y'all pay attention to the details. So it's good to see Rihanna and Kim. Like, listen, like, we feel good and look good in our underwear. Let's do something for the men, too. Cause what we got? Hanes, Polo, Hilfiger, Ethica, Calvin Klein Ethica. I don't like those. Those silk ethicals. I can't wear like that.

[Rory]

Silk doesn't sit well with you?

[Mal]

Nah, I can't wear silk underwear. I can't do it.

[Damaris]

Balls.

[Rory]

Just sweaty basketball shorts. Much better, right?

[Mal]

I don't wear basketball shorts with no underwear.

[Rory]

It was a callback to when we used to. Never mind.

[Mal]

Oh, yeah. Nasty times. Yeah. Remember that? Listen, we both high, man. It's okay, Peach.

[Rory]

Just edit. Let's chop it up.

[Damaris]

Rory, you didn't look and see that it said THC on the bottle when you took them.

[Rory]

Yeah, no, I know it had thc.

[Damaris]

Oh, you. Oh, I didn't. I thought. You thought.

[Mal]

He's going through the motions right now. He's fine. Just breathe. You'll be okay. I got you. Speaking of breathing. LeBron and Coco Golf. That. He said last name?

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Yes.

[Julian]

I don't get the breathing connection, but.

[Mal]

Okay, well, they athletes, they have to got to control your breathing when you. Some of the greatest athletes, you have to know how to, you know, reserve your tanks. They are selected as the official flag bearers for the USA Olympics. I think LeBron is going to be a flag bearer for a few years to come. Even after he's finished playing. He's probably the biggest athlete at Nike. Obviously, Nike is sponsoring the Olympic games, but this is a dope moment for LeBron to be a flag bearer. Coco Gauff, one of the young, great tennis players that we have. Two African Americans. This is dope. This is dope.

[Rory]

Who's your top five? Dead or alive? Flag bearers.

[Mal]

Flag bearers? I'm not sure. I'm. No. Subir was one.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

Outside of that, I don't know who. Who held the flag in 2020. I don't know who the flag bearers were in 2020. Well, Simone Biles in the closing ceremony.

[Rory]

So we think this is just the LeBron racket now moving forward. No more other.

[Mal]

Well, because it's Nike. It's Nike.

[Rory]

They have other athletes.

[Mal]

Yeah, but Nike. LeBron is probably the biggest Nike.

[Rory]

I feel like Bronnie Jr. Should have done it. My opinion.

[Mal]

See, why you gotta.

[Rory]

What?

[Mal]

Why what?

[Rory]

He's. He's a. A young athlete.

[Mal]

He's a young athlete with so much potential. Who has so drafted him. Exactly. Michael Phelps did. See, Michael Phelps was a flag.

[Julian]

Yeah. So 2016, Michael Phelps, Rio.

[Rory]

Yo, we had a flag bearer that was a cross country skier.

[Julian]

I was gonna say a lot. I'm not gonna lie. A lot of the names on these lists are from some. Like, non. Like, not from the major sports. Like last in Beijing, curling and speed skating were our two representatives. And then bobsled on the closing ceremony.

[Rory]

You know, we had, like, asked the question, if you weren't a podcaster, what's another dream of yours? I would love to do the curling thing. I think the way I mop at the crib, I really feel like I could smoke that sport. I even went to the American mall in Jersey to watch curling because I'm that weird.

[Mal]

Like, you really?

[Julian]

You do that Dolo?

[Rory]

Yeah, I took Amara.

[Mal]

Yo, stop doing that. Because whenever you say that, I can't argue with you because you got your daughter with you. So then it's like you try to make it cool, like, oh, you took your daughter.

[Rory]

She needs to experience curling.

[Mal]

Amara didn't know where the hell she was. Didn't make her no difference whether they were curling.

[Rory]

You don't. I'm laying the seeds now, okay?

[Mal]

Exposing it to the sport.

[Rory]

And then when she does her curling MVP award speech, she'll be like, yeah, my first memory was my dad showing me curling.

[Mal]

I watched the Simone B's documentary on Netflix.

[Damaris]

Oh, you did?

[Mal]

They're following her now. Current. I guess they're still filming for the. The Olympics in. In Paris. I forgot that that happened to her at the last Olympics where she. She pulled out of the competition because she had what they call the twisties.

[Damaris]

Twisties? Yeah.

[Mal]

I didn't know that that's what it was. I always thought it was like an injury or something.

[Julian]

What is it? What are the twisties?

[Damaris]

So the twisties are basically when you can't make your mind and your body connect. So she would flip and be in the air and have no idea where she was in the air, which is extremely dangerous considering she goes up 12ft. So it means you don't know what you're landing on, whether it be your head, your neck, your feet. So she had to pull out. It's a mental thing. And she, to this day, gets slammed by so many analysts and they, they. They basically said she pulled out on her team and they just.

[Julian]

Yeah, I mean, but that's not anything.

[Rory]

Go jump on that trampoline with the twisties, bro. Let me know how you do.

[Mal]

But good luck to Simone Biles and the rest of the gymnasts for Team usa. Hopefully they. They come back with another gold medal. Simone Biles is already, like, the most decorated gymnast of all times. I thought it was Michael Phelps, but obviously it's Samoan now, so. Shout out to Team USA gymnast.

[Rory]

Team August, right? Olympic start.

[Julian]

No, this Friday.

[Mal]

This Friday.

[Julian]

Today, when this comes out.

[Rory]

Jesus Christ.

[Mal]

Yeah, this week.

[Rory]

What are we doing recording Then we should be. We have to see archery.

[Mal]

Yeah. We have to look at our country. We have to support our country as.

[Rory]

Much as we don't like wearing flagship anytime Olympic year happens. I feel like all the USA shit goes crazy.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Like, we put aside our hate for this country when Kith does a collab, all the USA shit looks amazing because.

[Mal]

It'S only, what, every, what, four. Four years?

[Rory]

Yeah, four years.

[Mal]

You know, you get a chance to get some of your favorite brands. Nike obviously does some dope releases around the Olympics. I see Kith has a dope one that they're dropping as well.

[Rory]

Yeah, but I like it, though, because.

[Mal]

You get to, you know, your country, usa, and then you get to have these pieces for. Until the next Olympics. I got some sneakers from the last Olympics I think I never wore. I'll probably wear them this year.

[Rory]

You rooting for Canada through a lot of this, though. How are you balancing that?

[Mal]

Well, can those. Those are our neighbors to the north.

[Rory]

Friendly neighbors.

[Mal]

Friendly neighbors.

[Rory]

Part of the culture, in my opinion.

[Mal]

I would like to see who's playing for the definitely part of the culture. I would like to. But some. A lot of the guys that are in the NBA are Canadian. So the Canadian national team is going to be pretty good.

[Rory]

Yeah. We were talking. Was it on last episode or just off mic of that? This year is going to be drastically different.

[Mal]

It's going to be tough. It's going to be tough. That Canadian team, they got some pretty good guys on that team this year. So it's going to be tough for usa. I didn't realize that Kevin Durant wasn't playing yet. And a lot in these games, like, these games have been kind of close, like almost too close, but obviously it doesn't really count right now. But when Kevin Durant comes back, I think it's going to be drastically different. Drastically different.

[Julian]

You think so?

[Mal]

Yeah. I mean, he makes. Kd makes a difference.

[Julian]

I've been watching these games, these exhibition games. I just. I think that they're running into the issue where there's not enough basketball, like, to go around.

[Mal]

Well, people have to kind of. That is the thing with a team with so much talent. A lot of people are going to have to tuck their egos.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Mal]

And take on different roles, whether it just be, you know, specifically playing defense, rebounding. But I think that. I think these guys, they have the right people that you can kind of tell don't have a problem doing that as far as putting their ego to the side. But I just think the talent obviously around the world, on every other team is so good at this point. I don't know if this USA team can get gold. They should, especially when KD comes back. But it's going to be tough, though. This is going to be a tough year. Shout out to Luol Dang, too. What he's been able to do with the South Sudan team, he went over and went back to his homeland and completely built that program from the ground up. I mean, it didn't even exist. He had to build like literally out of his pocket facilities and everything to get the team together. And what he's been able to do over the last few years as far as having them at this level of competition and taking the USA team down to the last, what, minute. I mean, I think that's pretty impressive. So shout out to Lu Odang and everything that he's doing over there back in Sudan.

[Rory]

Maul, who is responsible for this Drake leak? Whose crib are we going to this weekend? Me, you and Chubs?

[Mal]

I think Drake is responsible.

[Rory]

Oh, he leaked it. Oh, so he out to his Crib. What's up?

[Mal]

Because he leaked his record.

[Rory]

Who's showing up to whose ever house leaked it?

[Mal]

Drake's house?

[Rory]

No, me, you and shows. All right, never mind. Forget it. There goes my.

[Mal]

I didn't even hear this record until y'all played it.

[Rory]

You've had it for months. That's why. No, really, you're definitely gonna tweet when this comes out. Oh, this. Oh, finally y'all hearing this. This old thing. Yo, glad y'all finally getting to.

[Mal]

No, I never. I never heard it. I heard it when we played it earlier in the studio, but we could play I give some of it now a little taste.

[Rory]

Oh, a little taste. Sod. Super.

[Mal]

So rainy days, his and hers matching coat.

[Rory]

I feel like that's already too much.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

You know, he really took a risk on this one.

[Rory]

Yeah, regular Drake formula sounds good. Cool. I listen to it.

[Mal]

Get it on the first listen. Get the bars. Captions.

[Rory]

Yeah. Pacify them.

[Mal]

Nice bounce. Nice groove to it.

[Rory]

I hope this is a leak and, like, not the final version, because I was not a fan of Yachty's verse whatsoever on this.

[Mal]

I didn't even understand what Yachty was saying first when he first came.

[Rory]

Like, that's why I hope it's like a reference. Really, the final. Because that's worse than that last Playboi Carti verse where I don't understand a one word he says.

[Mal]

But that's called, like, sauce. Like, you gotta kind of.

[Rory]

There's no sauce.

[Mal]

It's just gibberish and you get lost in the sauce. I'm saying you got lost in the sauce.

[Rory]

You couldn't really not like Ryan Leslie gibberish where there's sauce.

[Julian]

It's.

[Mal]

Yeah, it was gibberish.

[Rory]

He was just making noises.

[Mal]

That's sauce. That's style. I don't even know what I'm saying. I'm just here.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

I'm in the booth having a good time. Get with it.

[Rory]

If you get the vibe.

[Mal]

If you get the vibe, you get it. If not, go listen to something else.

[Rory]

I don't know. Yeah. Safe, Cool. Regular Drake song.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

I don't know what people really want in this. He's clearly chosen aside, he's going to continue to feed the core fan base that loves every last thing he does and not listen to any of us idiots on Twitter. They're like, rap more music.

[Mal]

Making music.

[Rory]

He doesn't care about us guys.

[Mal]

Summertime, let's have a good time. Let's dance. Making music.

[Julian]

Yeah, but what do you want from him? Like, that's my question.

[Mal]

Get back to this.

[Julian]

That's what I'm saying. Like I Look, this is just. This is like one of 100 Drake songs that sound like this. But that's what he should do. Just make shit, you know, is just like.

[Mal]

Get back to the music. Get back to the grooves. Get back to, you know, being a soundtrack of a good time and having fun. Just get back to that.

[Julian]

I just wish he wasn't doing everything with Yachty. That's my only criticism.

[Mal]

You don't. You're not. You're not. You kind of done with the Drake and.

[Julian]

Yeah, I'm good on that collab for the time being. Her loss was fantastic. I know Yachty had a lot to do with that. He also.

[Rory]

How much did he have to. I'm not here to hate, but how much did he really have to do with it?

[Julian]

He was credited for kind of like a ring and taking over that whole project and doing like background vocals and which he smoked. And I think for that project they took time and really leaned into it. Everything else since her loss, at least on my. From my point of view, when he collaborates with Yachty just seems like. It just. It just seems.

[Mal]

But this is probably not new. They probably didn't record this. Probably something they had.

[Julian]

No. Yeah.

[Mal]

Probably not in the files.

[Rory]

Yes.

[Mal]

You know what I'm saying? Decided to just because who. Who. Who played it? Was it Kai?

[Julian]

Kai. Yeah. Premiered this on a stream.

[Mal]

Kai premiering a record is hilarious.

[Rory]

He's done it before.

[Mal]

No, but I'm just saying just think about that for a second. Like a streamer is premiering a record from arguably one of the biggest artists in the world on his live on his stream. Like, times are so different, man.

[Rory]

But I'm with Julian. I don't know if Yachty has been my favorite sidekick. I mean that respectfully of Drake making music. I'm definitely more of a Drake and 40 guy than I ever will be of a new era. Drake and Yachty. Well, because it just sounds like Yachty's experimenting and working on new. That's not flushed out. And then Drake being the older person is like, well, if that's what you're on, let's do it. And they put out half ass music.

[Julian]

Yeah. And don't want to sound like a criticism towards Yachty. I like Yachty's music. I really like that Experience experimental album he did. That to me is a great sound for him.

[Mal]

But Yachty's album.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Love this album.

[Mal]

But that.

[Julian]

It's just. I Don't know the rapping side of Yachty. It's hit or miss for me. And when him and Drake seem to do it together, it just kind of, more often than not, is a miss for me.

[Mal]

I do think that at the end of, you know, obviously, all of this is kind of tapering off as far as the battle goes. I do think at some point when Drake decides to get to, like, just straight rapping, like, not the grooves, not the partying, like just straight bars. I do think we're gonna hear a different. A new Drake when it comes to just rapping.

[Rory]

I mean, I think, like I was saying before, I think he's focused on the other half of his fan base as of recent. Right now, and think he's gonna stick that way for quite some time. I think he's on some y'all. Like, I'm really about to change my career for the haters that love real hip hop on the Internet. Or should I just feed my fan base that loves this? Yeah, that's just what I personally think. Where Drake is at right now.

[Damaris]

After y'all paid Family Matt, not y'all, everybody in this room loved it. But after they paid Family Matters Dust, I. I think he's. He's good.

[Rory]

Yeah. I don't know if he's.

[Mal]

You said.

[Rory]

I don't know if he's in this revenge. I want to show y'all how much I can rap anymore. No, I think he was during the scary hours to Deluxe and into this battle to some degree. And I think he's now just like, yo, yo. Like, no, I'm just gonna keep doing what I know my core fan base loves. And it's this leak right here.

[Mal]

Yeah, obviously. Yeah. But I do think, though, once he gets into the bars and rapping, I do think we're going to sense a different tone and a different energy in those type of bars. Like the timestamp type of records, intros to the album. Like, when it's just time for him to just go off. I do think it's going to be a different version of Drake around this time, only because coming out of everything that just happened, I do think that his approach and his mind is a little different and a little probably more aggressive in his bars.

[Rory]

He's rapped.

[Mal]

Cause this is a groove record. We know what that is.

[Rory]

He's rapped extremely well about everyone being against him for years when they weren't against him. I can only imagine how he's actually gonna rap now that they are. Cause he's pretended to be hated for like his whole career now it finally happened. So now I'm really wanting to see.

[Mal]

Or he's rapping or knew that he was hated. Or he knew that he was hated. He knew that it was fake.

[Rory]

He checked his request DMs.

[Mal]

I'm just saying, you know, he probably knew all of this would happen at one point. But I do.

[Rory]

Eminem told him.

[Mal]

Well, yeah, Most of those MCs back then told him what was gonna happen. But yeah, I do think that he's approaching the bars different this time around. I think he's gonna sound a lot different than. Cause if you listen to early Drake and listen to Drake now, the rapping, the style, everything, the cadences totally different. His tone is different. I think coming out of this battle, the same thing is true. His tone is gonna be different. His approach to the bars and metaphors are gonna be different. I think that it definitely changed him as an artist. I think for the better. Some people feel like it's gonna affect his career. His career is affected. He's not gonna be the same. I do think he's not gonna be the same, but I think it's gonna be a better.

[Rory]

What's. Cause nothing was Thought it'd be different.

[Mal]

The harmony.

[Rory]

Do you think he'll outsell Eminem? Was it 2. 287 first week.

[Mal]

That's what the death of some slim.

[Damaris]

Shady did.287 big slim.

[Mal]

Just where big problem. I don't like y'all telling me I.

[Rory]

Don'T the you're not buying these numbers is what you're saying.

[Mal]

I just.287 and I don't. And again, maybe y'all like y'all said, it's not my algorithms. I just. I don't hear in moving around outside. I don't hear the music. And I know Eminem's music is not playing. Eminem's music is playing in stadiums and arenas and things like that.

[Rory]

Me and Peach Crib.

[Mal]

You and Peach's house. I know that. But I'm just saying it. When you say 287 now I should feel some of that music is all I'm saying.

[Damaris]

Well, Ma, what do you hear?

[Mal]

No, what.

[Damaris]

What do you hear?

[Rory]

There's songs with a billion streams that you've never heard. Like it's just outside of your bubble.

[Mal]

No.

[Damaris]

Have you ever heard Think about you? Think about me. Is that me? Espresso. Have you heard it?

[Julian]

Oh, that's that.

[Mal]

I feel like I heard that in.

[Julian]

Zara the New White, the Sabrina Carpenter.

[Damaris]

That was just so unnecessary.

[Julian]

What they're propping her up to be like this thing. She's so mid. She's just. There's nothing special about that girl.

[Damaris]

My point in singing that, I think.

[Mal]

I heard that in Zara.

[Damaris]

It's been on the top of the charts for forever. Have you heard Shaboozies Tipsy?

[Julian]

That song's hard.

[Mal]

Okay, I heard that.

[Damaris]

Well, Houdini is number seven on Billboard right now. I'm trying to think of what else. My point is half the songs on Billboard you've never heard because you're not the demographic.

[Mal]

No, I. I've heard. I've heard the music. I'm just saying, like, for an emcee and artist like Eminem, he just dropped an album and then you say, yo, it debuted at number one, which we probably guessed it would then say, yo, it did 287,000 first week. I'm just saying. I think I didn't. I don't even feel like I haven't heard any of the music anywhere. I haven't seen nobody posting videos to it on social media. Like, I just haven't felt the Eminem album yet.

[Julian]

Yeah, what would an Eminem tick tock trend?

[Damaris]

I'm saying, anybody gonna do a walk away video to.

[Julian]

Yeah. Kill your mom.

[Rory]

Yeah, but I mean.

[Mal]

No, but you know how some of the girls do the makeup tutorials and Eminem has that animated those animated bars where if you're doing like a makeup tutorial type of thing or the makeup videos, you would. You would think that somebody. I would hear that music somewhere.

[Damaris]

Okay, well, first, the type of music that Eminem makes and is risky and the type of shit that he says, especially on this album. No brand creator is ever going to do anything to Eminem. Especially big brand creators to Eminem music.

[Rory]

Yes, it's.

[Damaris]

You're asking to be canceled.

[Rory]

No way.

[Damaris]

He's on there saying all types of things.

[Mal]

So the makeup artist, they ain't taking risks.

[Rory]

No.

[Damaris]

Nah. They not risking two, three million dollars a year. They're not doing that.

[Rory]

Also, Brand's not letting them post that.

[Damaris]

Yeah, exactly.

[Rory]

Eminem song at all. And they're not clearing it.

[Mal]

Yeah, but I'm. I have not heard. I have not felt like an Eminem album drop is what I'm saying.

[Rory]

When Eminem relapse dropped, did you feel that in the streets? And that's when it was CDs and iTunes.

[Mal]

Of course you were.

[Rory]

Name one song from that album.

[Mal]

I'm terrible with titles. You know that. Why you keep attacking my Weaknesses.

[Damaris]

Oh, damn.

[Rory]

You don't remember my mom or Insane or Tanya or Bagpipes.

[Julian]

Damn, what Tanya do.

[Rory]

That was. Those were humming in the street Small.

[Mal]

When Relapse dropped, you knew Relapse. The album dropped. Like you felt that album that Eminem had.

[Rory]

I remember when it dropped, nobody talked about it. And it sold 600000 in the first week.

[Mal]

People were talking about Relapse, bro. What are you talking.

[Rory]

They definitely were not.

[Mal]

Yes, they were.

[Rory]

It didn't even have like a real single.

[Mal]

It don't have to have a real single. I'm saying when. When Eminem.

[Rory]

Prove my point.

[Mal]

When Eminem put that album out, people knew an Eminem album had just dropped. Like people were talking about the album.

[Julian]

Yeah, but that's always been the case with M. Like, even here.

[Mal]

I'm just saying right now it doesn't feel like anybody's talking.

[Julian]

So that in this write up. Well, this kind of goes against what you're saying, but like this is always the case with Eminem. Commercially, the project has undoubtedly been a success. Right. 287. Whatever. Critically. Like people that actually know music and talk about it for a living. Cough, cough. It sucks. Pitchfork gave it a 4.8. The needle drop. Anthony gave it a 5 out of 10. This metacritic gave it a 48 out of 100. So that's always been the case with Eminem. He's like counterculture, me against the world. But he'll still do stupid numbers. Just. It's dog shit music.

[Mal]

We know he's gonna do numbers because he's as. As big of an artist as he is. What I'm just saying is, I'm just comparing the times now, how an artist like Eminem can drop an album and it doesn't feel like he dropped an album.

[Rory]

I mean, I don't know. Candace Owens did a whole two hour segment about it. Like every media person was talking about it. I felt like people knew when Eminem album came out. I'm not saying anyone replied back and was like, yo, it sounds great. But they knew it existed and people clicked it. So yeah, 287 makes sense to me. He's Eminem.

[Mal]

No, he's definitely Eminem. I'm just saying the music to me is just. I don't know, man. It's. I can kind of see why artists are now hesitant with putting out music. I get it.

[Rory]

Because of em.

[Mal]

Not because of Em. But it's like when you're an artist like Eminem, right, Your legacy is already cemented. You have nothing to Prove you. Putting out a new project is strictly for, you know, creative. You just want to get this energy out, put something into the world, whatever. I don't. Eminem probably doesn't even care about numbers. Cause at this point, it's in autopilot. He knows what he's gonna do. I'm just talking about the way people hold on. How long do we hold on to art and music now? It's like we move past it after we listen for the first two hours, three hours. If it's not like, we don't even talk about it, don't go back to it. You don't feel the music when you're moving around.

[Damaris]

It's like, if it's good music, you do.

[Mal]

If it's good music. Yes, obviously. If it's like, the music that is, I guess people are gravitating towards now, the sound, the energy. If you are able to touch all of those bases and people are like, this is it. This shit is hard. Then, yes, naturally. But I'm just saying, when you're somebody like an Eminem at this level, should you even put out music in this type of environment?

[Rory]

I think he has, like, the least amount of stress or worry, because it doesn't matter. He's gonna be fine regardless. He's cemented. He's a legend. He can just put out whatever the fuck he wants. Meanwhile, other artists that are up and coming, that don't have that. That luxury. Not to say M didn't earn that luxury, but have that luxury. Every last move they make could make or break their entire career. Yeah, that, to me, is more scary. Like, I'm scared to put music out, because if I put out the wrong thing, this could. My entire career.

[Damaris]

Up Ice Spice. One bad song. And yeah, putting clocks on her. Cardi B. Cardi terrified. She's terrified.

[Rory]

I think M. Is it right.

[Mal]

I get it.

[Rory]

Whatever the he wants.

[Mal]

I. I can understand why somebody like Cardi would be hesitant. Like, even though it's been five years, six years.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

That's a long time. Especially having the success that you had on your album. That's a long time to not drop another album.

[Damaris]

Eight years, I think.

[Julian]

Actually, I thought that was 2018.

[Damaris]

Oh, it was. I'm sorry. I thought 2016. It was 2018.

[Mal]

That's a long time. Like, I'm not saying, but I can understand it, because maybe when she has the album done. Cause this is a real thing. Like, you've made music when you have the album done in your mind. The pulse and the energy that's out there now can completely change. You'd be like, my album is not serving that. It's not gonna contribute to that.

[Damaris]

Rory did that, like seven times.

[Mal]

But the great artists are the ones that can dictate the change and kind of manipulate the change.

[Damaris]

And Beyonce, for example, released a dance album, and then everybody started releasing dance albums shortly after.

[Mal]

You see what I'm saying? You got to be able to, you know, influence what's going on. Like, yo, listen, that's cool. But this is what we doing now. Let's do this, let's do that. But a lot of artists don't have that ability. And then they sit in the studio, make an album, think that they got the album done, and they like, yo, like, nobody's gonna even.

[Rory]

But that.

[Mal]

I mean, that's next to that sound.

[Rory]

Longevity amongst fans to be able to have that type of power to change the sound where enough people would hear it. Because there's plenty of talented artists that have a completely different sound that could dictate and shift everything. But only 10,000 people heard it. So you need. You need to be an artist like Beyonce to really do that these days. I don't know if there's. I mean, Frank coming out with Nostalgia was the last time I can kind of remember, like, an unknown changing a genre a bit. That has to come after album four or five.

[Damaris]

I feel like I would go. I might be reaching. I think what Cash Cobain is doing with Sexy Drill is changing the sound of the drill scene right now. The Sexy Drill, which is more about women and sex, and I look good and kind of that kind of thing. It's like change. It's not so much shoot em up anymore. Like, when you go out in New. I can only speak for New York and the type of places that play those types of music. I'm not hearing the hard drill anymore. I'm here hearing the sexy drill, and a bunch of New York artists are now copying that. Just talking about recent.

[Rory]

Yeah, no, I meant to a smaller degree. I definitely.

[Damaris]

Yes, to a smaller degree, yes.

[Rory]

But I mean, I'm saying more like. I mean, 808s would be like, the.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Biggest example of this. But even, like, the love below, things shifted. But had Andre done that on Southern playlistic Cadillac funky music, it wouldn't have shifted because he didn't have the reach that he had at the time. And I think that's especially harder now for someone to come in. I think Tizo came in and did a pretty good job. Yeah, but I don't I don't know if I've heard like any real shift amongst everyone because of it. I just don't know if that happens anymore.

[Mal]

It's. It's. I think we are gonna start to see a change in the type of artists that are pushed though. I think we get into that point.

[Rory]

Like when Future came out, things changed for sure.

[Mal]

For sure.

[Rory]

I don't know if that. That artist exists the way it used to.

[Julian]

I feel like it just exists for the person. Like the person is just known for that sound. So we always talk about, like Anderson Paak every time he, you know, with. When it's one of his records, whether it's his song or he's featured on it, there's just a sound that comes with that. But I don't think that changed the scope of the way drums are laid or the way songs sound in general. Like, Tommy Richmond is another example of that.

[Rory]

Like, I feel like Anderson added a bop to certain hip hop now. I mean, like when him and Mac was the name of Dang Bang. Like when that came out, when Mac was one of the first rappers to take that, that pack sound and put it on hip hop. I saw a lot of artists start doing that type of shit. What we used to call barefoot music like that. Definitely. I feel like Anderson Paak did change hip hop a lot. Everyone kind of has that certain bop record. I hear Meg do it a lot now too. Like even more of the ratchet side takes pack sound, Lotto Records. I've heard sound that way. He added that and then Doja Cat, you know, took it to the next level.

[Mal]

That album is still hard.

[Julian]

Scarlet.

[Damaris]

Why you look at me and say it?

[Julian]

It is.

[Damaris]

I believe.

[Mal]

I know because I know you with it. But that album, I was listening to that Doja Cat album the other day. Like, Doja to me is like, she might be underrated. That's how good I think Doja Cat is.

[Damaris]

Like, she might pop stars ever.

[Mal]

I still, I still think she's underrated.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mal]

I still don't think as a rapper.

[Damaris]

You think she's underrated.

[Mal]

As a rapper, 100.

[Damaris]

I agree.

[Mal]

No, as an artist, I'm talking about the full package, really, visually, musically, performance. I think Doja is like, she's super underrated. As big as she is, as. As much, you know, as tickets she sells. People don't talk about Doja Cat enough for me.

[Julian]

I think if she didn't go as weird because her ascension after, what was that album that just took her put on a whole nother planet? Planet her planet, her. She was in it, like, the zeitgeist of superstardom. She's the face of pop. And then all, like, the weird, the foot, her dating history, all that. If all that stuff stayed in the dark and never, like, came to light, I think she'd still be in that because she was. She had that crown. She was heralded as, like, the. The pop star.

[Damaris]

She started running from the limelight too.

[Julian]

But, I mean, yeah, I think she just leaned into the person that she always is. I'm not saying I'm not faulting her for that. She. That's just. She is a, you know, left of center. Like, she's into weird shit. That's fine. She still has an amazing career. But if she really wanted to be that, like, mega, mega star, she would have had to, you know, hide that part of herself. But she could. I mean, she'll do festival.

[Mal]

I'm so mad I didn't catch her show in L. A. I think we landed the day after her show.

[Damaris]

Really?

[Mal]

I was so mad about that, because that's the one person that I haven't seen live that I want to see live is Doja Cat. Like, to me, she's like, I would.

[Damaris]

Love to see Doja.

[Mal]

She's one of those, you know, artists that we gonna look back on and be like, yo, she was amazing for years.

[Rory]

Are you gonna draft her in the vocalist competition on Patreon?

[Mal]

Not as a vocalist, no.

[Rory]

We got in your top five of all time.

[Mal]

No, not vocalist.

[Julian]

I saw her on tour at the Williamsburg Music hall years ago, 2019. I saw her right when the Moo song came out. The Macau and the Macau and the first half. I mean, the majority of the show was her just barring, like, rapping her ass off, which I did not. I wasn't aware.

[Mal]

I'm saying she's underrated as a rap.

[Julian]

And then she ended, obviously. She ended. She changed, put on the cow suit, did, like, this whole dance and charade. It was hilarious. Had, like, all these people come out with her, and that was the end of the show. But that for, like, 40 minutes, I was like, oh, she can rap. Like, I had no idea.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

And she was spitting. It was great.

[Mal]

Yeah. Her album is still. It still gets rotations in my. In my phone, for sure.

[Damaris]

Are you still playing Nikki's album?

[Mal]

I haven't played it in a while. Certain songs, but not, like Doja's album. I play from top to bottom. Just let it run.

[Damaris]

Okay. I was just checking to see if you were still a Barbara.

[Mal]

Oh, yeah, definitely. Still a boss forever. It's tatted.

[Rory]

But there is a little tension between Doja and Nikki now, right?

[Mal]

Is it?

[Damaris]

I think that's just stand Twitter.

[Rory]

You sure? Because I don't want to. You have to retract your statements if that is the case.

[Damaris]

I think it's just.

[Mal]

Nah, come on, man. Y'all can't be creating a beef between Nikki and Doja. Like what? Come on, stop there. What the.

[Rory]

There was rumors.

[Mal]

Come on. We're not gonna pay those rumors no more. I. I would. I def. I want to see them collaboration. Like, I think a project with them two would be crazy.

[Rory]

Yeah, that would be. Haven't they done a record together?

[Damaris]

I don't think so.

[Rory]

Or is that what the beef came from?

[Damaris]

Supposed to, but it didn't.

[Mal]

I would like a full project from Nicki and Doja.

[Damaris]

I think Nicki knows that saves so.

[Julian]

Has a Nikki feature.

[Damaris]

It does, Yeah.

[Rory]

I think it was on the remix.

[Julian]

The remix?

[Rory]

Do we have voicemails?

[Mal]

You've got mail.

[Julian]

Jesus.

[Mal]

Breathe.

[Julian]

Just breathe. Yeah, let's do this one. This is actually a good one.

[Mal]

Here you go.

[Rory]

What's going on?

[Julian]

Rory Mall.

[Josh]

My name is Josh from Texas. Huge fan of the pod. Listening since day one. Just hoping to get your advice on something. Been dating this chick for about six, seven months. Everything's been going great. At the beginning of the relationship, everything is cool. You know, we take trips every other weekend. We go out on a road trip or we fly out to Vegas for the weekend and things like that. Everything was cool. But then in March, I finally set up child support with my baby mama and they started docking my check. Now between child support, insurance and taxes, I'm paying about a thousand dollars of every week. So right now, money's a little tighter than it used to be. My girl, now she still tries to do things how we used to in the beginning, you know, taking pre long winded here and there, planning trips. And right now, you know, I've got to be a little smarter with my money and try to pay off some debt that I got, you know, trying to save up to buy a house and everything. So just hoping to get y'all advice, like, what's the best way to tell her without, you know, coming off sounding like a bum or something like that, you know, because at the end of the day, I gotta pay child support. I gotta make sure my kids are straight. But, you know, I don't want to hold her back from doing things she wants to because of me. So I was hoping to Get y advice, you know.

[Rory]

All right, break that one down.

[Julian]

So, yeah, the audio is ass. So he's just.

[Mal]

He's in the financial crisis, like most of the country right now. Money is tight.

[Julian]

Well, no, but you got to explain why.

[Mal]

Well, he has child support.

[Julian]

He has a girlfriend.

[Mal]

He has, you know, things. He has bills. He has things he has to pay. On top of his child support, which.

[Julian]

Is a bill, he has a girlfriend. They were doing all these things together, going on trips, taking her into nice dinners, spending money, Spending money on his girl.

[Mal]

He had more funds at one point to have a good time, but now he has responsibilities and things that, you know, he has debt that he wants to pay off. He's thinking about, say he's trying to save so he can buy a house, being a responsible adult. And he doesn't know how to tell his girlfriend because she's still spending, as if things didn't change financially in his life. So he's trying to figure out how to tell his girl, like, hey, we have to stop because of my child spending some. Well, dad, taxes and, you know, just other things that he has to pay. We have to stop spending so much because I eventually wanna buy a house and, you know, be responsible. So he's trying to figure out how to tell his girl without sounding like a bum or like he's broke. What's the best way to approach it?

[Rory]

The way he described it, to be.

[Mal]

Honest, I was about to say simple as that. The same way you called and left us that voicemail. Sit your girl down and say, babe, listen, you know, things right now have changed. Things are going on. You know, money is. Has to go different places, and I wanna save to buy a house. So we're gonna have to kind of grind and, you know, miss out on a few things. A few trips, a few, you know, fun things that couples do for a few months so that we can stack and save.

[Rory]

He should just record you saying this and then play it to her.

[Mal]

Well, that would be smart. Hey, babe, listen. Stop spending.

[Rory]

Hey, babe, it's mall.

[Mal]

Start saving. Because I don't want to be homeless. I want to buy a house. Simple as that. I don't think that's hard, and I think she would respect that.

[Rory]

You think she'll show her ass?

[Mal]

Nah. Well, I don't know. I don't know how his woman. I don't know what type of woman he got, but most women that are in relationships that would care about their significant other would appreciate him trying to be responsible and wanting to save to buy A house. So I think it'll go pretty good for him. I think his girl understands and like.

[Julian]

His expense is his kid. It's not like he has to put this money towards some bullshit.

[Rory]

Wasn't the kid around like before?

[Mal]

But not his or the trips and all that. I think she just put him on child support.

[Julian]

Gotcha.

[Mal]

Yeah, so that's something that kicked in where he's.

[Julian]

And if the girl you're dating really, you know, cares for your loves you, I'm sure she probably at some has a relationship with your kid. Maybe not six, seven months. I don't know. How do you. How would you guys do that? Six, seven months in, would you have your girlfriend meet your kid?

[Rory]

No.

[Mal]

Seven months in?

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Rory]

No.

[Julian]

No.

[Rory]

Probably have to pass the year. Year mark at least.

[Julian]

What do you think?

[Mal]

I could see people seven, seven months introducing their. Because I think, I mean, if you with somebody for seven months and you have a kid, you would have to actively, you know, go out of your way to make sure or keep your kid away from meeting your significant other. Seven months is a long time to be dating or be with somebody in a relationship and you have a kid and they never met your kid. That's a long time. Seven months is a long time.

[Damaris]

That's a long time, right.

[Rory]

Why is that a long time?

[Damaris]

That's a long time.

[Mal]

I mean, I'm not mad at waiting a year. If you want to just make that the number that you feel like is comfortable to like. Okay.

[Rory]

How many times in life have you dated someone for three months? I'm sure a lot of times. Not just gonna. Then I'm just bringing people in and out for my kid to see.

[Mal]

That's what I said. Seven months. It's. That's a. I'm not mad at seven months. I'm not mad.

[Rory]

I would compromise at seven. I'm not mad I said the year.

[Mal]

But I'm not mad at a year. But I think that if it's seven months and you feel like this person is somebody I see in my life.

[Rory]

Or the marriage looking like two weeks.

[Damaris]

No, it's not even that. I just think. I just think you're being a little unrealistic. I'm not saying that you can bring this person. That you should bring this person in and say, hey, this is daddy's girlfriend, or this is mommy's boyfriend, or let them see you kissing or anything like that, but meeting your child, you could just say, oh, this is mommy's friend. It doesn't mean that they're staying the night when they're staying night or whatever. You know what I'm saying? Like, I just feel like a year without you, because then you've been with this person for a year, and you don't even know if they know how to handle kids at this point. You don't even know if they get along with your kid, and you done been with them for a year now. Like, I just feel like that's. I feel like it's unrealistic, and it's just not. Probably not the best way to handle that. I don't have kids. I've only dated people with kids and had to go through this myself. I'm. I'm not mad at four, five months just to meet. Like, just to meet them. Not a big introduction, but just to be in the same room with them. Then if you want to have the big introduction of, oh, this is obviously serious at 9 months, 10 months, 11 months, 12 months. And I only see that really be in a conversation if this kid is, what, four or older? If they're younger, then they don't know. Really know the difference anyway. They just know it's somebody that's around. They don't know, oh, my parents are broken up, and this is the new you, know what I'm saying? Like, I just. I don't know.

[Mal]

We was having a conversation earlier.

[Rory]

Ever brought a guy she was dating for two months around tomorrow? I'm gonna need another focus gummy.

[Mal]

White boys be ready to lose. Like, y'all can't wait.

[Rory]

Oh, I didn't say that. A joyful tone.

[Mal]

Yo, they say black people live by the wish factor. I think white people live by the a wish factor.

[Damaris]

Way more old. What. What the does that even mean, the wish factor?

[Rory]

Like, old Southern riddle.

[Mal]

No, you wish it. You wish. I wish my girl would bring some new dude around my.

[Damaris]

Oh, no, no.

[Mal]

White people live.

[Rory]

Y'all can't wait for a. Yeah, it's called a manifesto.

[Mal]

Y'all can't wait. We was having a conversation earlier. Not gonna say who said it, but I asked somebody. I said, yo, you thought about cheating before? And they said, yeah, I thought about it. Y'all don't feel like if your significant other thought about cheating on you, like, that's like kind of like you kind of sort of cheated on me if you're thinking about cheating on me?

[Julian]

No.

[Mal]

You didn't like you thinking about cheating on me?

[Damaris]

No.

[Mal]

Like, if a nigga be like, yo, I ain't gonna lie. I thought about robbing you the other day. Like, I was gonna put the gun to you and, like, take all your jewelry. Like you gonna feel comfortable being around that person again.

[Rory]

He didn't do it.

[Mal]

So if your man say, you almost cheated on you last night, I ain't gonna hold you. You ain't gonna trust him again.

[Rory]

Wild sentence.

[Julian]

No, no.

[Damaris]

There's a difference between I almost and I thought about you.

[Mal]

Okay? If your boyfriend says, yo, babe, I thought about cheating on you last night.

[Damaris]

I. I think that he thinks that I'm not. Because he had the thought.

[Mal]

I'm just saying, would you ever. Would you ever really trust him, like, to. That he's not?

[Damaris]

No, because I think that you're a lunatic for coming up to. I don't trust, like, the type of person you are. I think you're crazy. You came up to me and you said that, and you thought you were gonna live to tell the tale. You thought you was gonna walk out the door and was gonna be cool.

[Mal]

I'm just saying, though.

[Rory]

So I wish I would.

[Mal]

Yeah, exactly.

[Damaris]

No, I really wish a would like a tree.

[Mal]

But so. So you look at that like, it's kind of like you did cheat.

[Damaris]

No, I don't look at it as if you did cheat, but you getting.

[Mal]

You having the same reaction as if he did, though.

[Damaris]

No, that's not the reaction I would have.

[Rory]

They have dreams of us cheating and get mad at us.

[Julian]

I was gonna say, what about a dream? If you wake up, you're like, oh, my God, this bad? Was like, on my.

[Damaris]

Why would someone say that in a dream one time?

[Julian]

Oh, why would you say, I don't know. Know why anyone?

[Mal]

You don't have to offer that dream. Like, that's a dream deferred.

[Julian]

Well, that's what you.

[Rory]

It's just you and your brain. No one needs to know.

[Julian]

What you just said to Maris is more or less the same thing. Why would you come home, be like, babe, I almost cheated on you? That's worse. That actually almost happened.

[Mal]

No, I said, he thought, like, you got to keep him hate, I'd make some love last night. You know, Like, I was drinking wine in the club.

[Rory]

Like, red wine.

[Julian]

It was red wine.

[Mal]

And, like, you know, I saw somebody and we just had, like, a conversation, you know, normal, regular, just adults. And I ain't gonna lie. Like, I thought about cheating on you.

[Damaris]

I think most people. Well, you mal. That's just such a deeper, darker, criminal link. Because I feel like if you come to me and tell me that you thought about that, it's you probably asking me permission to open up this relationship. There's a reason why you're telling me that everything you do is for a reason. You having the thought. I'm not. I feel like everybody who's ever been in a relationship has had that thought. The part that makes you a faithful partner is the part that makes you a loyal partner is not doing it. You didn't do it. You had the opportunity to do it, but you didn't do it. You had the thought. Everybody else, we're all attracted.

[Rory]

I don't think there's one relationship either. Either person hasn't thought about cheating.

[Julian]

It's human nature to think about. Like, that's not. You're a lying piece of shit. Like the people that say, I don't see race, Rory, I don't see color. See color or race.

[Damaris]

Rory sees color.

[Mal]

He's seen a bunch of color or religion. I can tell you that. I don't know, man. I just think that if. If. If your girl said, I thought about. Or your significant other say, I thought about cheating on you.

[Rory]

But that's why some things you don't say that.

[Julian]

That's not something you say.

[Damaris]

You never been. Been with a girl and thought about a bad. That you saw. Of course you have.

[Julian]

It's like you meet your girl, you're. You're with your girl, and she brings her. Her friend, who is also just beautiful. Oh, no, obviously you're not gonna be.

[Damaris]

Like, he's a piece of.

[Julian]

I would. I would love to. Your friend. You don't say that to her. You just think, how's that a piece of Jul.

[Mal]

Your friend.

[Rory]

But that's what. That's what human stops you from saying things out loud of like, oh, wow, I really want to. Your friend. Wow, your friend's prettier than you.

[Julian]

Which is. That's always a tough one when that happens.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Because women don't have any other value other than the way they look, right?

[Julian]

No, not amongst their friends.

[Rory]

That's true.

[Mal]

Never thought about it like that.

[Julian]

Yeah.

[Mal]

I don't know, man. But Justin. Justino. What is his name? Justin.

[Julian]

You love saying the names when they don't introduce themselves.

[Mal]

I thought he did say his name was Justin. Did he?

[Rory]

I couldn't hear shit.

[Julian]

No, no, the audio on that was awful.

[Mal]

Well, listen, man, just have that conversation with your girl.

[Julian]

Oh, Joshua. This was Joshua.

[Mal]

Oh, Joshua. I'm sorry. I'll get Justin from Joshua. Just have the conversation with your girl. I don't think that if she, you know, she's the girl that's meant for you. She'll understand. And she would not be mad at her man trying to be responsible and save up to get a house. I think that's an honorable thing to do. So just have the conversation. There's nothing to try to avoid or, you know, walk on eggshells about.

[Rory]

What would you do if your girl said, I thought about cheating last night?

[Mal]

Cheat what I do.

[Rory]

Yeah. And also, it's not like y'all were in, like, middle of a fight or there was anything spiteful. Like, you guys were great. She just came back and was like, you know, thought crossed my mind. I didn't act on it.

[Mal]

I'm like, yo, you got some balls.

[Rory]

Is this another wish I would.

[Mal]

Nah. I mean, what can you do at that point? Like, just. I don't know, man.

[Rory]

I don't want that type of honesty. People want honesty. That's like. I draw the line on honesty there. Keep that to yourself.

[Mal]

There's such thing as being too honest.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Julian]

I don't.

[Rory]

I don't need to know that. Like, the human nature factor that we all have. I don't need to hear yours. Keep that to yourself.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

If you cheat and want to admit it, to me, that's different. Just certain thoughts keep to you.

[Julian]

I wouldn't even call it being honest.

[Rory]

We're all weird.

[Julian]

Like, irrational. Like, you're doing more damage than yes. Like, it's not. It's. It's just dumb. Like, there's no value add to. To going up to your partner and be like, would love to hit this girl on the train. Oh, my God.

[Rory]

I would love to.

[Mal]

That girl. Not like that, man.

[Rory]

You'd rightfully so. Be me, too, in a minute. If you just started saying the things that were actually on your mind.

[Julian]

Yeah. Psychology 101. Your id, ego and superego. Yes. Yeah. You gotta. There's a gentle balance between those three.

[Rory]

What if you were in a relationship now, Julian, you came home from your, you know, Beard.

[Julian]

Yep.

[Rory]

Trimming.

[Julian]

Where are we going with this?

[Rory]

And your girl went out that night and then came home and asked that question.

[Julian]

What do you mean? She asked me that she thought about cheating.

[Rory]

And then you put two and two together. No. 1. It was because you don't have your beard anymore. I mean, that's the only factor.

[Damaris]

Listen, I. It's. I feel like if you're in a relationship, you should have asked your girl. Like me. You didn't ask me before you cut your beard. And I feel like you knew. Yeah, but, you know, we didn't really have that discussion because now I'm looking at you and it ain't hitting the same. You don't like it because some girls are beard girls. Like, some girls really, really like guys with beer. I'm with you. You're beautiful no matter what you look like. But some girls beautiful no matter what you look like.

[Julian]

Yeah, that, that Bruno Mars.

[Damaris]

I'm uplifting my partner. But some people really, really like beards. And if you were to cut it down. Same thing with women in here. Some men don't play that cutting your hair shit.

[Julian]

I've had some women message me out the woodwork about me since I cut the beard last two days.

[Rory]

Like shallow, positive, positive vibes.

[Julian]

Yeah, like, let me see it. No, bitch.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Now you can eat their. Without giving them an infection.

[Julian]

Telling you that's what people think.

[Rory]

This is like the five o'clock shadow would hurt your thigh.

[Julian]

This hurts way more. This is like you, that it's sandpage, like, it's sandy. It's not pleasant. This in between some thighs would that you leave. Rub your raw, you leave with a rash. For sure you would. It's not. It's not fun. And I can't. I can't oil this. It's too short to oil.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

You know, I do want to get a facial though. If you guys want to go get a group facial, we can group on it.

[Mal]

Group facial. Jul.

[Damaris]

Yo, that's a pornhub category.

[Mal]

What make Julian think that I would be like, yeah, no, let's go get a fac.

[Julian]

You never got a facial mic.

[Mal]

Yes, I've got. I'm not going with you to get a facial.

[Julian]

But if we groupon, like, it's. It's fiscally responsible. This gentleman should do more things with a groupon with his girl.

[Mal]

Well, yeah, that's true.

[Rory]

He can bring his kids.

[Julian]

See, now you got it.

[Mal]

We got another voicemail.

[Julian]

Yeah, let's do this. This is a. This one happened this morning or yesterday.

[Caller 1]

Yo, what's good?

[Mal]

Rory and Ma.

[Caller 1]

Baby D. Julian, hope all is well. I shot your last show in Toronto, which is kind of irrelevant, but not really, though. Firstly, I know Rory has his opinions on photographers and guys with cameras. Was I looking for anything? So not too long ago, I met this girl off of Twitter, which was my first freak encounter in my life.

[Rory]

Swag.

[Caller 1]

Turned out she had a little bit of a side only fans account.

[Rory]

Nice.

[Caller 1]

Soon came the questions regarding a little bit of a business proposal from her. And off the first link, we made a movie which was absolutely insane to me because I ain't never done anything like this. Nothing. Relationships.

[Rory]

He reading a script.

[Damaris]

And didn't we already have a caller who said this exact same thing?

[Julian]

No, he made a Zoovie.

[Rory]

No, I don't think so.

[Damaris]

No way. I got deja vu. We had a caller that was a photographer that said they made a porno off the first link, remember? And that's when we started talking about photographers and calling the nasty.

[Julian]

I don't.

[Damaris]

It's just this.

[Julian]

This call just came in. This is new.

[Rory]

Well, bring it back a little bit.

[Caller 1]

Business proposal from her. And off the first link, we made a movie, which is absolutely insane to me because I ain't never done anything like this. Not in relationships, my majority of my life. Now, I do have some career aspirations that may involve propelling myself into the public light with YouTube, Twitch and all that. So what I'm trying to ask is, should I Adam 22 the situation and see things as a new avenue in content creating, or should I just run and focus on keeping a squeaky clean image? Thank you.

[Rory]

Even the thank you felt like it was read off a piece of paper. Yeah, he definitely wrote all that down and read it back. But I. I mean, I think he should lean into what's. What's getting the most traffic. Keep that girl, bro. It could be a whole lane.

[Mal]

But why did he sound like he was reading, like somebody's like, voicemail. But you know when somebody leaves your voice note and you can read it?

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Why do you sound like that?

[Rory]

Because I think he wrote it all out and just read it back.

[Mal]

Writing out what you about to leave us?

[Damaris]

Yeah, no more of them. More of them need to do that so they're not sitting there. Like, why they driving?

[Rory]

I was at the edge of my seat. Even his narrating was great.

[Mal]

Yeah. Great voice.

[Julian]

My initial question is if you're the. Say he gets some money off this only fans, which let's assume it's. There's some money coming in. Would. Would you want to be. Could you guys be the unrecognizable, like, dick in an only fans account? Like, your face is never in. You're just the dick. Sure, I could do that.

[Rory]

Yeah. I have no issue with that.

[Julian]

I could definitely do that.

[Rory]

Hypothetically. I'm not going to do that.

[Mal]

But.

[Damaris]

But never just a dick. Your asshole is there, like, as long.

[Julian]

As my face is fine.

[Rory]

I got manscape.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

No, no identifiable. Like, no tattoos, no face. Like, nothing that would identify me.

[Rory]

This is why I can't take gummies and have this conversation. I didn't think about that.

[Mal]

You touched.

[Rory]

Yeah, I'd be caught.

[Mal]

Right.

[Julian]

But like you got mad with my hand.

[Mal]

And you could have a long sleeve T shirt on.

[Rory]

Yeah, this in a long sleeve T shirt is crazy. I'm not in a long sleeve.

[Julian]

Wait for you to catch it straight from the pool to the.

[Mal]

Being ass naked from the waist down with a long sleeve tee.

[Rory]

Look like Winnie the Pooh.

[Julian]

Long sleeve is crazy.

[Damaris]

I love long sleeves.

[Mal]

Yo. In a long sleeve, tea with nothing else on is. Wow.

[Damaris]

Just sweat stains.

[Rory]

I feel like when I was young though, I probably in a hoodie a few times.

[Mal]

Oh, you gotta get.

[Rory]

Because you only had so much time in the place you was at.

[Mal]

Or if you don't want to use the long sleeve tee, get the like the copper fit sleeves.

[Rory]

Just like Iverson put the sweat finger the fans on.

[Julian]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mal]

The copperfish sleeves. Why not? It man. Get that.

[Rory]

Yeah, I feel like. But it'd be creepy because I have to wear gloves too. With gloves is insane. Well, like it's not in like some doctor cosplay porno.

[Julian]

Like wide receiver gloves.

[Mal]

Yeah, like boxing gloves.

[Rory]

A chicken boxing would be the funniest.

[Mal]

You keep her like this. You just sitting over the side of.

[Rory]

Your getting behind it. You shadow boxing behind her.

[Mal]

I might try.

[Rory]

Then you can have a robe too.

[Mal]

I might try that. I might try to get that off. Put on. Put on my boxing gloves and have sex. I might try that.

[Damaris]

That's role play. You beating the pussy up.

[Mal]

Exactly on, baby. Dude, see sexy red over there do.

[Rory]

A whole scene of just catching you at the boxing gym sparring.

[Mal]

Y'all keep telling.

[Rory]

I got this sex like a speed jaw is hilarious.

[Mal]

South jaw.

[Rory]

That'd be the name of the part.

[Damaris]

That'd be the name of the porno.

[Julian]

She could be on all fours and you could hit her clit like a speed bag.

[Rory]

It's a big clip. I believe that's a dick. I believe you're referring to a penis.

[Mal]

Yeah, Julia. That ain't a click. I don't know what he told you.

[Damaris]

I don't know what you what.

[Mal]

She told me that a clip. You might. You might have some more questions you need to ask.

[Rory]

The had some balls under it too.

[Mal]

All right, let's get some more.

[Julian]

Looks like snuffle up against his nose.

[Mal]

Come on, Julian.

[Rory]

All right, man.

[Julian]

All right. Now you guys don't know Sesame Street.

[Mal]

This is where you. This lose me.

[Damaris]

You know, thug.

[Rory]

Do we have another voicemail?

[Julian]

Do we want to do another. We flew through that one. What do you Think. Should he do it or not?

[Rory]

What's. What was the question? Oh, yeah, no. Keep that girl on only fans. And also do your twitch thing. You have to keep a squeaky clean image anymore.

[Damaris]

Be careful because you might have kids one day.

[Rory]

A president's a felon. You don't need a squeaky clean twitch image. You'll be fine.

[Damaris]

Don't do anything that you think you might regret when you're 50.

[Rory]

If you don't have one, then just go sign with Rumble. They'll let anything go.

[Damaris]

You be on Rumble.

[Rory]

I've never been on Rumble. I just know all the people that do nasty end up on Rumble.

[Mal]

But the whales are beefing.

[Rory]

This is a one sided beef. We've only been living.

[Mal]

Did you talk about how the whales are one day gonna all come together and attack us?

[Rory]

And when did I spew that theory?

[Mal]

Yeah, he said one day. He's like, y'all don't think the orcas are getting together and gonna.

[Rory]

Well, they have been.

[Mal]

Yeah, because they move in pods.

[Rory]

Yeah, they've had meetings, but the same way whales did. They did walk on earth. We move in and then they adapted into the ocean. Who's to say that that can't reverse?

[Mal]

They still don't have their land legs. Yeah, yeah, I see what you're saying.

[Rory]

As time goes, imagine you're chilling on Broadway and an orca with legs starts running at you.

[Mal]

Also, I know that gentleman.

[Rory]

We call him orca too.

[Mal]

I know that gentleman.

[Rory]

But yeah, the whales are pissed off.

[Mal]

The funniest part of this video is the dude that jumps off last minute at the front. Like, you saw him dust. Like he, he thought he was gonna be able to like, hold on. Like, all right, it's not gonna flip over. Just imagine how fucking scary that is though.

[Rory]

And you landed on a whale.

[Mal]

Like a whale jumps on top, the back of your boat, flips it over, and now you have to jump in the water with that whale.

[Rory]

If we were all together on a boat and that happened, you guys would have to swear to secrecy to not tell the world the sound that came out of me. If that happened, you would Yelp? Yes. Highest pitch.

[Mal]

I'd.

[Rory]

My arms would be going like this. If a fucking whale jumped on our boat.

[Julian]

I mean, that's justified in this moment.

[Mal]

I want to go whale watching, but like, this makes me like. I don't know, man.

[Damaris]

Yeah, like my, my land ass business.

[Mal]

I want. I wanna. I wanna experience that. I want to experience being in the water that close to Wales. But like, this is like, nah, I think we should just watch National Geographics.

[Rory]

There was another humpback whale. I think it was in Australia during, like, one of the Americas cups or something, and it smashed onto one of the boats.

[Mal]

It's like an iconic photo now, but nobody died, so.

[Damaris]

Oh, that's lucky. They could swim.

[Mal]

Yeah, well, I don't think nobody died. I hope nobody died. I don't think whales are. Those aren't killer whales.

[Rory]

Not humpback.

[Mal]

Humpback whales.

[Rory]

The killer whales move in pods and they are plotting on us. This, I think, was just a, you know, misjudgment.

[Damaris]

Damn. Are we killer wells?

[Mal]

Are we killer whales?

[Damaris]

You said the killer whales move in pods.

[Rory]

Are we like, humans?

[Julian]

No odds.

[Mal]

Yes.

[Damaris]

Gummy. It's okay. It's.

[Mal]

Nope.

[Damaris]

It's cool.

[Mal]

No way. Look at that. Look at that picture.

[Julian]

They're huge.

[Mal]

See, I want to see that. But not that close.

[Julian]

Not that close.

[Damaris]

I'm good.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Julian]

What do you do in that situation?

[Damaris]

Die? I don't.

[Julian]

Like. I'm more so like the boat. Like, you can't flip the boat as.

[Mal]

The boat is just finished. Yeah, the boat.

[Julian]

You just go. You just swim to the. This other boat, one of these other.

[Mal]

One of the other boats.

[Julian]

Because it doesn't look like this kid here is looking like he's trying to wait for them. He's put that in drive and it's about to take off.

[Damaris]

And he not driving fast enough, sitting up there watching that happen. I'm good.

[Mal]

He probably was scared and hope it was maybe like, let's get the out of this water or out of this way before he come over here and do the same.

[Julian]

No injuries were reported, so.

[Mal]

All right, well, there you go.

[Julian]

It's safer to do this and go to a Chris Brown show.

[Rory]

All right, let's wrap up.

[Mal]

You all right, man?

[Rory]

Yeah, I'm cool.

[Mal]

You good?

[Rory]

Wonderful.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Feel better now.

[Mal]

All right, well, tickets available now for Detroit.

[Rory]

Thank you, Philly. You guys were amazing.

[Mal]

Thank you, Philadelphia. August 22nd, we will be in Detroit at the St. Andrews Hall. Just tickets now. And then August 25th, we are at the City Winery in Chicago. Tickets available for both shows now. Tickets [e-mail] Hope to see y'all there. Rory, you made it through Gummy kicking your ass, but it's okay.

[Rory]

What? I was weird this episode.

[Mal]

Nah, he was all right. Didn't even notice you. We'll get back to y'all soon. Be safe, be blessed. Have a great weekend. I'm that he's just ginger peace. New warrior now.