Episode 455 | Unhappy Valentine's Day

Summary

New Rory & MAL – Episode 455 | “Unhappy Valentine's Day”

Release Date: February 13, 2026

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Overview

This lively episode of New Rory & MAL, subtitled “Unhappy Valentine's Day,” dives deep into the chaos, comedy, and emotional intricacies of Valentine’s Day. Hosts Mall, Damaris, and Baby D exchange stories, take hot takes, break down relationship dynamics, and answer hilarious and heartwarming listener voicemails about love, dating, and all the complications around V-Day. Expect plenty of jokes about holiday pressures, gendered expectations, pet gifting, and some unexpected discussions about reptiles and goth Puerto Ricans.

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Main Topics & Discussions

1. Valentine’s Day & Its Pressures

[03:10 – 11:36]

• Red Rose, White Ceiling

  • The crew jokes about being alone on Valentine’s Day with a “red rose and a plain white ceiling.”
  • Mall: "It's my Valentine's Day, yo." [03:17]
  • They poke fun at last-minute Valentine's runs at the drug store and the symbolic sadness of lonely celebrations.
  • Memorable Moment: Playful roasting about buying discount roses at Duane Reade and staring at the ceiling.

• Palentine's & Galentine's

  • Discussion of men gathering for “Palentine’s,” unity vs. individual goals, and women’s “Galentine’s” rituals.
  • Baby D: “At the Gallantine’s, there’s no boys allowed.” [05:10]
  • The group agrees: Galentine’s can be emotional, but not necessarily a cry fest. “Waiting to Exhale” references abound.

• Valentine’s Day Standards

  • Is it OK to reschedule V-Day with your partner? When is postponement acceptable, and what are good “excuses”?
  • Damaris: "If you had a boyfriend and he couldn’t hang out on Valentine’s Day, honestly, would you be upset?" [08:26]
  • Baby D: “Bring me to London,” joking about not taking no for an answer.
  • Mall: "What do you do for work, unless you're playing in the All-Star Game?"

• Situationships & Testing Commitment

  • Valentine’s as a “litmus test”: people start acting weird in early February, picking fights, or “breadcrumbing” to avoid making plans.
  • Damaris: “You find out how much people really like you around Valentine's Day.” [11:27]
  • Mall: "Arguing February 2nd, that means he putting your relationship in the crock pot for sure." [11:55]

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2. Being the “World’s Best Ex” & Relationship Self-Reflection

[12:18 – 14:54]

• Baby D sports a “World’s Best Ex-Girlfriend” shirt and shares stories of breakups, forgiveness, and youthful mistakes.
• Baby D: “… it was your fault. Like, you did something. And he was like, nah. Like, I'm off set.” [12:57]
• Recounts of messy teenage relationships (“You ever just send the same text to seven different people?”) and lessons learned.

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3. Toxic Love Music & New Album Releases

[15:10 – 19:25]

• Celebrating new albums dropping for Valentine’s:
  • Brent Faiyaz’s “toxic” music, produced by Rafael Saadiq, Mike Dean, Benny Blanco, and others.
  • Jill Scott’s “To Whom It May Concern” with features from JID, Too Short, Tierra Whack, and more: “I love a good toxic Jilly from Philly album.” [16:40]
  • Debate about “toxic” artists by star sign (Aries women, Gemini men).
    • Baby D: "Aries women make the best, like, toxic music. Her, Summer Walker, Ari Lennox, Jasmine Sullivan." [17:55]

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4. Valentine’s Gifts: What Do Men Want?

[21:18 – 23:45]

• Women’s go-to gifts: personalized robes, cologne, silk sheets/robes—met with comical skepticism.
  • Mall: “The only thing silk in my house is my do rags.” [22:06]
  • Sex on silk sheets felt to be a “safety hazard.” [22:39]
• Hilarious riffs on classic and quirky gift ideas, including hotel waterbeds and nostalgia.

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5. Pet Gifting (and Critter Tangents!)

[29:02 – 35:56]

• Giving puppies, goldfish, and (tragically) carnival fish as Valentine’s gifts.
• Mall: "How many puppies do you think get abandoned by February 18th?" [29:02]
• The group goes down memory lane with stories of childhood pets dying, custody battles over fish post-breakup, and the responsibility of pet ownership.
• Slippery slopes: “Don't bring no dog that's gonna be knocking over like…” [30:13]
• Strong anti-snake and anti-lizard pet opinions, leading to comedic takes on the real-life and “vibes” of exotic pet owners.

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6. Goth Puerto Ricans, Snakes, and Subcultures

[39:31 – 43:14]

• Nostalgic and hilarious discussion about the unique subculture of “goth Puerto Ricans” in NYC.
  • Mall: “Is there still goth Puerto Ricans in the Bronx? ... they were running the Bronx.” [39:30]
  • Discussion moves from snakes and reptiles to trench coats and quirky urban folklore.

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7. Listener Voicemails: V-Day Dilemmas & Solutions

[44:03 – 59:19]

Voicemail #1: Rescheduling Valentine’s Day

[44:03 – 52:18]

• Caller frustrated over V-Day dinner crowds and proposes celebrating on Sunday instead; his girl isn’t happy about it.
  • Mall: (on the logic) “To me that’s proper logic. I’m not gonna say man logic, because man logic is just actual logic.” [45:20]
  • Damaris & Baby D stress creativity—do something special at home if you want to avoid restaurants (decor, chef, thoughtful gestures).
  • Key Takeaway: Effort and originality count more than a crowded dinner or a postpone. “A projector is a cheat code,” says Mall, suggesting home movie nights with photos or love letters.

Voicemail #2: Dating Multiple People on Valentine's Day

[52:19 – 59:09]

• Taylor calls in: If you’re seeing two people, which one gets the day?
  • Damaris (53:05): “Whoever’s not on their period.”
  • Mall (53:06): “Choose neither. Kill a grandparent and then spread it out next week.”
  • Jokes on scheduling, priorities (“Split the day is sicker”), and scheduling woes.
  • Damaris (54:19): “You don’t even love your kids equally...”
  • Ultimately, you “pick the one you like more,” though group dissects all the messy ways to maneuver it.

Voicemail #3: Romantic Poetry

[60:07 – 62:45]

• Listener “Josh” delivers an elaborate love poem. Panel jokes that he's secretly rapper Vic Mensa.
  • Baby D: “Can you type out the words for that and send it to me?”
  • The hosts riff on poetic love notes and the challenges of two poets dating: “Arguments would be all fridge notes and rhymes.”

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8. Bisexuality & Relationship Insecurities

[77:14 – 85:01]

• Caller expresses mistrust of dating bisexual women, fearing he isn’t “enough.”
  • Baby D relates: She’s more attracted to women but prefers men for non-physical traits.
  • Mall: “It doesn’t matter. You would cheat on me no matter what your sexual preference was, if you wanted to cheat.” [79:54]
  • Debate on logical emotions, gender expectations, and whether you can feel emotional “logically.”

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9. Petty Bets & Hip-Hop Challenges

[87:11–91:30]

• Closing bit: Playful bet about naming 100 rappers in 20 minutes.
  • Baby D: “I bet my next month's salary that you cannot name a 100 rappers in 20 minutes!”
• Strategic approaches abound, regionally mapping rapper names.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Mall (03:17): “It’s my Valentine’s Day, yo.”
• Baby D (11:32): "Start getting weird around February 2nd."
• Damaris (16:53): “She’ll be mean to you or break up with you and be like, well, now why’d you make me do that?”
• Mall (22:06): "The only thing silk in my house is my do rags."
• Damaris (29:18): “When the summer come, they don’t want that damn dog.”
• Mall (39:30): “Is there still goth Puerto Ricans in the Bronx?...they was running the Bronx.”
• Damaris (54:19): "You don’t even like your kids equally."
• Mall (79:54): “You would cheat on me no matter what your sexual preference was, if you wanted to cheat.”
• Baby D (91:13): "It’s the thinking in the moment and the pressure for all of those rappers."
• Damaris (16:45): "Jill’ll break your heart, make you tea, and like some incense as you pack your shit and get out her house."
• Baby D (22:39): "Having sex on silk sheets is literally a safety hazard. You just slipping and slide. Ain’t no grip."

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Tone & Style

The vibe is candid, irreverent, and full of inside jokes, but with moments of sincerity when discussing love, relationships, and insecurities. Bollywood-level advice sits side-by-side with tongue-in-cheek commentary and warm encouragement.

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Segment Timestamps

• [03:10] – Show kicks off with V-Day “red rose, white ceiling” jokes
• [05:10] – Galentine’s Day breakdown
• [11:27] – “You find out how much people really like you around Valentine’s”
• [12:18] – “World’s Best Ex” stories
• [15:10] – Brent & Jill Scott Toxic Album Discussion
• [22:06] – Robe/Cologne/Gift Slander
• [29:02] – Gifting & Abandonment of Pets
• [39:31] – Reptiles, Subcultures, & NYC memories
• [44:03] – Voicemails: V-Day plans and dilemmas start
• [53:05] – Multiple partners on V-Day
• [60:07] – Listener Love Poem
• [77:14] – Bisexuality and Relationship Security
• [87:11] – 100 Rappers Bet

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Summary Takeaway

“Unhappy Valentine's Day” is a sprawling, comical ode to the realities and absurdities of modern love. Whether you’re single, coupled, or somewhere in between, Rory, MAL, and company have a story, hot take, or hilarious roast for you—along with genuinely practical and creative advice for holiday relationship headaches. Oh, and they can probably name 100 rappers faster than you think.

Transcript

[Baby D]

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[Mall]

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[Damaris]

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[Baby D]

No worry and ma.

[Mall]

No conductor.

[Baby D]

White roses and also peonies.

[Damaris]

White rose, red ceiling. Red rose, white ceiling.

[Mall]

It's my Valentine's Day, yo.

[Damaris]

That is my valentine. Red rose and white ceiling, Yo.

[Baby D]

It's a lot of people. Valentine's. The red rose, not the rose. The red rose, white ceiling. You looking up at that alone.

[Mall]

That was actually really funny. Just alone. That was actually very.

[Baby D]

Turning your house into a barbershop.

[Mall]

Plain old white eggshell paint ceiling.

[Baby D]

Yep. Red rose, white ceiling.

[Mall]

Right from Duane. Read those roses. 13.99 right there. And you. You went in Dwayne Reed to get something else, so you forgot what day it was. He's like, you know what? Let me just grab these.

[Baby D]

Oh, you somebody. The wrong rose. Boo. That's why I said, that's a lot of people. Valentine's Day. Red rose, white ceiling.

[Damaris]

Yeah, you missed.

[Baby D]

You missed that.

[Mall]

Maybe it's another entendre. Yeah, I was speaking from my perspective from Palatine.

[Baby D]

Are you guys celebrating Palantine's Day?

[Damaris]

Damaris, I would never in my life celebrate anything with a bunch of other single men. Like, you think I would get together with other single men in, like, unity.

[Baby D]

You've definitely been in unity with other single men before. And y' all don't went out to find women.

[Damaris]

I mean, as a younger. Yeah, as a. As a teen or as a younger man. Yeah. As a grown adult.

[Mall]

I don't know if that was unity. That was more just a common goal.

[Damaris]

Yeah, that was just. We didn't. We had no other choice. That was just. It.

[Mall]

It wasn't like a unity where if one person couldn't get the rest of us, wouldn't it. We'd all go, and then we'd venture off on whoever won that day.

[Damaris]

Exactly.

[Mall]

There was no unity. Everyone was leaving each other once we went together.

[Damaris]

But we all had our own agenda.

[Mall]

GPS is the only thing we had in common at that point.

[Baby D]

Well, it's supposed to be like. Like, if a girl hitting on you, like, you know, you get her number and stuff like that and be like, oh, I can't leave with you. Like, I'm with the guys tonight.

[Damaris]

Who said that?

[Baby D]

That's how we do on Galentine's.

[Damaris]

Y' all say y' all can't leave with y'.

[Caller]

All.

[Damaris]

With the girls.

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Y' all do not say that.

[Mall]

Only on Galentine's day.

[Baby D]

Only on Galentine's day. Yeah, we're gathering together. Like, there's no boys allowed, y'.

[Damaris]

All. Okay. At the gallon times. There's no boys allowed.

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Y' all leave there and go meet up with. With a man that is y'. All. Y' all don't spend the night with each other on Galentine's, y'. All.

[Baby D]

Sometimes girls do. Yeah, not always.

[Damaris]

But that's not the point of Galentine's. It's not a sleepover.

[Baby D]

Well, it doesn't have to be a sleepover. No. But a lot of us just leave and then go home alone.

[Mall]

No, a lot of women go to Galentine's day and think in their head, I don't want to spend time with these single. I want to be with my man.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Final show face.

[Damaris]

And what does a single woman do at Galentine's? Like, if all other friends are, like, in a relationship, like, what is this?

[Baby D]

We're at Galentine's. They're talking, drinking, catching up. You know, women, community. There's no crying. Who the is crying at Galentine's Day?

[Damaris]

Somebody cried at Galentine.

[Baby D]

Oh, my Lord.

[Mall]

It's been a bad one. Oh, my God. I love my support system. No, I found my tribe.

[Baby D]

We're there. Waiting to exhale.

[Damaris]

Yeah, they cried at one.

[Mall]

Waiting to exhale, trying to slip in, waiting tax out.

[Damaris]

Like, they actually cried. Did you see that movie?

[Baby D]

We exhaled? Yeah, we exhaled together.

[Damaris]

You have a Galentine's? You going to?

[Baby D]

Not this year, no. I don't have any. I'm going to this year. I wasn't invited, and I didn't throw one.

[Damaris]

So do I ask the other question, though, since you're not going to Galentine's, are you doing you can you.

[Baby D]

There's plenty of people who do Valentine's who also do Galentine's. It's not Valentine's. Dependent.

[Damaris]

Okay. All right. So is love in your face this Valentine's Day?

[Baby D]

I have. I have Valentine's Day plans. Yes, I do.

[Damaris]

Round of applause for baby. My round of applause. Baby D Valentine's Day.

[Baby D]

The is having a date is nothing to clap over. That's regular.

[Damaris]

No.

[Baby D]

Valentine have a Valentine's Day.

[Damaris]

No, I don't. Oh, right. Round of applause from all.

[Mall]

He does not have Jesus. This is Valentine.

[Damaris]

See how simple that was? No, I don't. I don't have a Valentine's Day.

[Mall]

Why?

[Damaris]

Why?

[Baby D]

Why?

[Damaris]

I don't know. I just don't have a Valentine's. It's no, like, real theory or anything behind it.

[Baby D]

Just don't have a Vale chilling.

[Damaris]

What about next weekend. Like, what if you have, like, a date next weekend? What does that consider that would be.

[Baby D]

If you have a date next weekend, it's just a date. Yeah.

[Damaris]

Just a date.

[Baby D]

Yeah, if you have a date next weekend. But you can also. Sometimes people are busy on Valentine's Day, so you can reschedule and be like, hey, we'll celebrate next weekend.

[Damaris]

Valentine's Day is every day when you love who you're with. That's.

[Mall]

That's true.

[Damaris]

Yeah. You get white. White lotus. What's your favorite? White roses.

[Mall]

White roses.

[Damaris]

On a Wednesday. On a random Wednesday. White roses for Baby D. Yes.

[Baby D]

But, you know, sometimes it's nice to feel like, you know, like a Valentine. Like, cup. Cupid shot you again. It's like renewing your vows.

[Damaris]

I don't think it's anything like renewing your vows.

[Baby D]

No, it's like a rem. Like, okay, yes, you love me every day. But, you know, prove to me. Remind. Just a reminder. Just a special reminder. I hate that men try to.

[Damaris]

Special reminders are good.

[Baby D]

Valentine's Day doesn't mean anything. Like, oh, it's just.

[Damaris]

I never. I would never say that. I think Valentine's Day is important, especially in relationships. I think it's a day to profess your love with the rest of the world on the same day. Like, let me see if I could outdo my homeboy and what he did for his lady today. You know, I mean, it's just a com to me.

[Mall]

That's what I don't like about Valentine's Day. I think Valentine's Day is important and should be celebrated, but it shouldn't be the pressure of what everyone else is doing. Like, do what works for you.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Even if that means, yo, can we do it next Saturday? Like, I do think it's important to set aside a day to celebrate those things, but we can get into the Hallmark conspiracy. But other than that. Yeah, it's important, but not because of Instagram.

[Damaris]

Baby D, if you had. If you. If you had a boyfriend and he couldn't hang out on Valentine's Day, honestly, would you be upset? Like, say, work? He had to travel. He had to do something.

[Baby D]

Like, it would depend on the day. It would depend on the. On why you couldn't do it.

[Damaris]

Like, work or something. Like, he had to, like, fly to London for a company.

[Baby D]

He had to fly to London for a conference. A conference?

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Baby D]

Okay. Why am I. To bring me to London.

[Damaris]

Bring you to work with him.

[Mall]

I mean, if. If you're gonna be at work for.

[Baby D]

You'Re gonna be at the conference for maybe five hours out of the day. It's 19 hours left of the day.

[Damaris]

Okay, so go. So fly with. Fly me to you. But you want to be together no matter what on Valentine's Day?

[Baby D]

Not no matter what, but if. If possible. Like, if someone's dying in the hospital.

[Damaris]

Like, it has to be drastic like that, or.

[Baby D]

Yeah, something like that.

[Mall]

Stage. Stage three. No. Stage four. Acceptable.

[Damaris]

But you can't. It can't be work like, keeping you from.

[Baby D]

What do you do for work. What do you do for work? Unless you're playing in, like, the All Star Game. What do you do for work?

[Mall]

Look at the bar. It has to be, like, saying, like.

[Baby D]

What do you do for work? That you.

[Mall]

Have to go to London.

[Baby D]

He's a.

[Mall]

What, like a trader? Like a Wall street guy?

[Baby D]

Wall street guys don't have to go to London on.

[Mall]

I've seen the Wall street movie. They were in London for one scene.

[Damaris]

Okay, what if he works the lighting rig for, like, a group that's on tour and they're, like, on the road during Valentine's Day and it's like a concert that night?

[Baby D]

Where are we at? Fly me out there.

[Damaris]

Okay, so it's like you have. You want to be there, though?

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Okay, but if he's playing an All Star game, you don't mind staying home?

[Baby D]

No, I'll just be in the stands. But technically, we're not spinning it together. You're on the court.

[Mall]

It's. I mean, I feel like those friends and family tickets are tough at Valentine's Day.

[Damaris]

Oh, really?

[Baby D]

Okay. You don't need to do anything to avoid spending time with y' all bitch.

[Mall]

Well, first of all, if you're comparing to gentlemen like me, I think it was two Valentine's days ago we were in LA to shoot all those. My karma's beautiful. I flew her out. Still did the whole Valentine's Day thing while we did. While we were working in la. We were there for the whole week. My honorable still did the. Got the. My favorite masseuse in la.

[Damaris]

It's a good man, right?

[Mall]

Got a private chef. I did the whole Valentine's Day thing. He did and still got to record boss.

[Baby D]

I just feel like Valentine's Day is the same day every year. It doesn't change. It's not like Thanksgiving. It's the same day every year. You know when it's going to be.

[Mall]

The same day of the week, though?

[Baby D]

Okay, That's.

[Mall]

That changes things. Everybody's off for Christmas. Okay, maybe I Have something to do on a Wednesday.

[Baby D]

Okay, what do you have to do on. If you have to. If you have to work on a Wednesday, what time do you get off? You get off at some point.

[Damaris]

I'm doing a double.

[Baby D]

You do it.

[Damaris]

You doing it.

[Baby D]

That was the day you picked to do a devil.

[Mall]

That's what's been on the calendar for a year.

[Damaris]

I'm doing a double. Somebody called out, I had to cover.

[Baby D]

Like I feel like stuff like that is understandable. Like if your partner can't be with you for Valentine's Day, as long as they have a good reason, like that makes sense. It's more. It's never the partner. Like it's never the person you're in a relationship with. It's when you're dating or in like a situationship or you're. You find out how much people really like you around Valentine's Day. That's when you're like dating. It's like, ah. Hold on.

[Damaris]

You find out how much people really like you around Valentine's Day.

[Mall]

So much pressure.

[Baby D]

Start getting weird around February 2nd.

[Damaris]

What they start doing?

[Baby D]

Pick. I don't see men pick fights.

[Mall]

February 2nd, that's the long game. Yeah, usually I remember that on the 13th, like, oh, tomorrow's Valentine's Day.

[Damaris]

Yeah. He's slow walking that the 12. The second he start arguing.

[Mall]

That's honorable actually.

[Baby D]

You gotta drop you got breadcrumbed argument. You gotta point out what you're gonna be pissed about later.

[Damaris]

Arguing. February 2nd, that means he putting your relationship in the crock pot for sure.

[Mall]

He's slow cooking 10 hour setting too.

[Damaris]

He wouldn't.

[Mall]

Not even on high.

[Damaris]

He putting you right in the crock pot. I'm gonna put in on the 2nd and let it slow marinate to the 12th. And then we're gonna call it like we need some space.

[Mall]

And then March 1st to be like, things were weird. I was, I'm sorry.

[Damaris]

I was just a weird and I was depressed.

[Baby D]

People, people. Deal with it. People. Deal with it. People.

[Damaris]

What does your shirt say?

[Baby D]

World's best ex girlfriend.

[Damaris]

Yo, what's. You like the Grinch that stole love? Like you like the Grinch? You like the Grinch of Valentine's Day? Like that's what's wrong with you. Yo.

[Baby D]

I figured it was Valentine's Day theme, so I wore it.

[Damaris]

World's best ex girlfriend. I like that. There's something nobody would.

[Baby D]

None of my exes would disagree.

[Damaris]

So it's one of your exes that's like she lying.

[Mall]

What does it Entail to be the world's best ex. And is that something that someone currently dating you should feel away baby do.

[Damaris]

You've never been the reason, like, you and somebody didn't, like, work out or broke up.

[Baby D]

Been the reason, Like, I did something wrong.

[Damaris]

Like, yeah, you did. Like, it was your fault. Like, you did something. And he was like, nah. Like, I'm offset.

[Baby D]

I got broken up with before, but that was cause, like, he. He cheated on me and I forgave him. But then, like. Like when I. When I. He forgave me, like, he went through my phone and I ain't really forgive him. So.

[Damaris]

Wait, wait, what does that mean? You didn't forgive him?

[Baby D]

Because I ain't really forget. He pissed me off. He pissed me off. So I started like I was. He caught me on a bad. He caught my phone on a bad day. Like, you ever just get.

[Damaris]

No, no, no, wait. Don't let Baby D just gloss. What does caught my phone on a bad day mean?

[Mall]

You didn't delete everything?

[Damaris]

Like, what does that mean?

[Baby D]

At the time I was around 18. I was around 18. 19.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Baby D]

And you know when you. When a nigga, like, or just period. When you get pissed off and your ego gets hurt and you just. It's like you send the same text to seven different people. I was 18, so I had like seven different niggas on my phone. Right?

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Baby D]

Was in a relationship, but I hadn't talked to none of them. But he caught me on that one day when I text them all like, hey, how you doing? Because he had pissed me off so bad. So it was niggas that hadn't heard from me in years. But he. I sent them all the same text message. Boy, he caught. He the raw. When he asked for my phone, I just naturally was like, here. And I was like, wait, never mind. He's like, nah, shorty.

[Damaris]

So he didn't see it.

[Baby D]

He saw it.

[Damaris]

Oh, okay. He saw.

[Baby D]

I tried to take it back. He grabbed it, kicked me out his house. I was crying.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but 18, that's understandable.

[Baby D]

Yeah, I was 18.

[Mall]

I don't even. I don't even count that as you being broken up with, because in that forgiving, cheating gray area, who really knows what's going on? The relationship is all.

[Damaris]

She knew what was going on. She knew exactly what was going on. So that was the only time that you ever got broken up with and any other time after that and in your relationships, it's been you doing the breaking.

[Baby D]

Oh, no, my ex broke up with me. But not because I did anything wrong. He broke up with me because he knew he was making me miserable.

[Mall]

That's nice.

[Damaris]

He knew he was making you miserable, so why not make you unmiserable? Why just leave you?

[Baby D]

The world may never know the world may never know but yeah, he knew he was making me miserable, so he left me.

[Damaris]

All right, well, happy Valentine's Day to all the lovers out there.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

If you were recording this on Thursday, tonight at midnight we get some toxic love music from one of our favorite. Brent Fyres is dropping some of his best toxicity tonight.

[Mall]

And Peach was telling me I didn't see. So if I get this wrong, please blame Peach and not me. I saw some of the producers were Rafael, Sadiq, Mike Dean. Who else did you say? Benny Blanco.

[Damaris]

I mean, Rafael Sadiq and Brent is an interesting. I like it, I like it.

[Mall]

I like Brent and Benny too. Give me a little pop bop.

[Baby D]

Pop bop is very funny.

[Mall]

I'm not mad at that at all, Brendan. And when Mike Dean get in some of his dark bag. Yeah, I'm with that. Like, I. I love to hear that. Those. Those are the three. Oh, Chad Hugo is on there. Tommy Richmond is funny, but no, I think Tommy Richmond does actually, like, produce, though. No, this looks great. Fave. I know. Fave is dope. Yeah, these. These are all great.

[Damaris]

It's Berg. Is that hit Mega.

[Mall]

No, I think that's probably just a different bird. I'm sure it would. I'm sure it's a hit maker.

[Baby D]

They would have put young in front of it. This must be Oldberg.

[Mall]

Okay. Mastering and engineering, Mike Dean. But when Mike Dean does that, he usually produces as well. So don't. Don't flame Peach. Mike Dean is still. Still somewhat of a producer if he's engineering the entire project. I'm excited for this. We talked about our last episode. Now I'd say we get the Jill Scott To Whom It May Concern album as well at midnight to balance out some of that toxicity. But some of y' all be forgetting that just Jill Scott is over a Neo soul beat. She getting her toxic bag too.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I love.

[Mall]

I think y' all have Jill. Like, none of y' all are really listening to Jill Scott.

[Damaris]

Jilly from no.

[Mall]

J from Philly.

[Damaris]

That's Jilly from Philly. Yeah. I love a good toxic Jilly from Philly album.

[Baby D]

Aries. Aries Women.

[Damaris]

Cuz Jilia break your heart and then she'll like, make you tea and like some incense and try to make you feel better as you pack your. And get out her house.

[Mall]

She's one of those that she'll be mean to you or break up with you and be like, well, now, why'd you make me do that?

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Look what you turned me into.

[Mall]

Look what you made me do.

[Damaris]

Look what you made me do. You made me throw all your shit out the window. See you. Maybe I didn't want to do that.

[Mall]

The whole house is ashes.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Now all the neighbors know.

[Mall]

Now you have nowhere to live.

[Damaris]

The neighbors know all our business. Now because of you, I'm here for it.

[Mall]

Features on it are Jid. Too short.

[Damaris]

Too short.

[Mall]

We're gonna get some time.

[Damaris]

Oh, my God. Okay.

[Mall]

Absol. Tierra Whack and Trombone Shorty. I love that Tierra Whack is on it. You guys already know how I feel about her. Both. Philadelphia. I think that's great.

[Damaris]

A.B.

[Mall]

Too short. J. That's all right. We're gonna get some rapping on here. Yeah, but I like what she did with Conway. Like, Jill is always good, even with the. The newer rappers. Yeah, but I don't know, man. I can tell just by how she's smiling on this album cover that she's been. Yeah. That's the way men, we're not safe.

[Damaris]

That's the way Baby D smile after she did some fuck shit. 100% same smile.

[Baby D]

I'm telling you. I said Aries. Aries women make the best, like, toxic music. Her Summer Walker, Ari, Lennox, Jasmine Sullivan. All Aries women.

[Damaris]

I would have never known all of those women with Aries.

[Mall]

See the things that pay attention to y'.

[Damaris]

All. Pay attention to those small little details. Like, y' all will hear a verse and be like, yo, what's her birthday? That's what women do. When was Jill Scott born?

[Mall]

Are Aries women in music to Gemini men?

[Baby D]

Who are the Gemini men in music? Let me see.

[Mall]

Kanye, Pac. It's. It's like a weird. It's a weird list of Gemini men artists that. It does make sense. It's. It's psychos. In a good way. I'm not saying in a bad way, but there are a lot of. Was that Paul McCartney that came up first?

[Baby D]

Tupac, Kanye West, Kendrick Lamar, Paul McCartney, Prince, Bob Dylan, CeeLo Green, G, Eazy, Fetty Wap, Big 100,000, Ice Cube. Damn.

[Mall]

Yeah, there's. There's a wild Gemini list, for sure.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Mall]

I love that they listed g, Eazy before 3,000, but, you know, maybe it was alphabetical order before Andre or three.

[Damaris]

No matter which way you slice it.

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Mall]

I never knew that about all them that, that does check out with R B women with Aries. But I'm very excited. I know there was always rumors that her and Premiere were working on an album together. I don't know if some of that made this or. But they didn't put production stuff. I only saw the. The features. But I. I don't know which one. I gotta see what mood I'm in or even if I'm awake at midnight tonight to which one I'm gonna throw on first.

[Damaris]

You be sleep before midnight sometimes.

[Mall]

Most nights.

[Baby D]

Most nights? Yeah. Yeah, I wish mall text me. You text me at 12:30 last night I woke up. Like why the I got a text message from mall.

[Damaris]

Maybe I sleep at 12:30.

[Baby D]

I had been sleep for two hours already.

[Damaris]

Damn, I envy people that can be sleep before the news goes off.

[Mall]

It's 24 hour news cycle. It's 9 11. It's never gone off.

[Baby D]

I can wake up. I'll wake up at 7am it was. It'll still be on? Well, yeah. You was asking me my sizes. What's up? You was buying me a gift for Valentine's Day?

[Damaris]

No, it was the same question I asked you earlier, but I wasn't sure if that was in men's or women's.

[Baby D]

Oh, okay.

[Damaris]

So I just had to make sure.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Baby D]

Thought I thought I was gonna wake up to a gift from all. You know, since he don't have a valentine, I thought he was gonna ask me.

[Damaris]

I do respect that you like answered it. And I didn't send me like European size because, you know, women love to do that. I'm a 36. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Baby D]

Oh, I stayed. I send the list.

[Damaris]

No, no, no, baby, no, no, no.

[Baby D]

You gotta send a list when you first start dating somebody. I send a list. Or European sizes, regular sizes, everything.

[Damaris]

You send a list of your size?

[Baby D]

Of your sizes.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Baby D]

Women don't do that to you.

[Damaris]

Send me a list of their sizes. Yeah, no, like just off. Just like if I didn't ask, they just send it.

[Baby D]

Well, if you ask for one size, they give you all the sizes. Like if you ask for my sneaker size, I give you like the European shoe.

[Damaris]

Your waist size.

[Baby D]

Waist size.

[Mall]

All that that is gotta do with your feet.

[Damaris]

What your waist gotta do with your.

[Baby D]

Feet because you're eventually gonna need it again. So you could just copy and paste it and put it into my notes and put it into the notes underneath my contact so that you never have to ask me again.

[Damaris]

Got it. Very prepared. You're very. You played a long game. I like your style. Like you very. You like. We gonna get this all out the way now.

[Mall]

When she sends you that note, go up to the and see how many other people in that shared note move, man. Why you trying to ruin the last person that edited that? Like, all right, man, if she lost.

[Damaris]

Weight, she had to make adjustments. I'm not that size anymore. Last time I said this, I was that size. I'm not that size anymore.

[Mall]

Have you ever done anything nice for a man on Valentine's Day? I'm not. I'm here. I'm not here to make this. Women don't do on Valentine's Day. I know women that do things, but it's not just because men don't. Don't post it on social media the way women do. But what's something nice you've done?

[Baby D]

I feel like, why is it that. I don't know. I feel like Valentine's Day is for lovers, but I don't like. What would y' all want on Valentine's Day? Y' all don't like the robes with your name printed on them?

[Mall]

No, thanks.

[Damaris]

I got one for my birthday.

[Baby D]

I know you got a couple of them.

[Damaris]

I never wore it, though.

[Baby D]

But you don't want cologne. Y' all have all the colognes.

[Mall]

I'll pull out the robes like Mr. Rogers, just different colors. Same one every single time.

[Damaris]

I got mad robes. Every birthday, I got like, seven robes, and I only wear one.

[Baby D]

You got a silk one?

[Mall]

Hell.

[Damaris]

What type of kinky old man do you think I am? A silk robe? Hell, no.

[Baby D]

I bought a man a silk robe.

[Damaris]

The only thing silk in my house is my do rags. That's it. A silk robe? No, I don't have a silk robe.

[Mall]

To match the durag.

[Damaris]

No, that's too much silk.

[Mall]

Silk on silk sheets?

[Damaris]

Silk. Silk on silk is crazy.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

I'm not mad at you.

[Mall]

I know I get them, but, like, as a full time sheet, like, maybe for one night we could throw some silk sheets on, but for, like, your regular sheets.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

That's crazy.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Last time it was on silk sheets, I was like, listen, I run hot, baby. I got to take these shits off the bed. I run too hot to lay on silk sheets. Like, silk sheets. That shit will make you sweat all night.

[Baby D]

Having sex on silk sheets is literally a safety hazard. You just slipping and slide. Ain't no grip. Knee don't got no grip.

[Damaris]

That's all right. I'm right behind you, though. I'm right but so you fall off the bed. I'm right behind you. We can finish down there. Don't worry about it. Right off the bat with you. Yeah.

[Mall]

That's funny. I feel like Maul. I could see mall, like, renting a hotel that specializes in water beds for Valentine's Day. I can see him. I'm not some like that.

[Baby D]

You are kind of old, though.

[Mall]

I'm not that older.

[Baby D]

Bed before.

[Damaris]

I don't think I've ever had sex on the waterbed.

[Baby D]

Really?

[Damaris]

I've slept on a waterbed before, but I don't think I've ever had sex. Who.

[Baby D]

Where were you at that you were sleeping on the water bed?

[Damaris]

I forgot somebody. Somebody I know had a waterbed and spent the night. I was young. I was, like, probably, like, 16, 17.

[Baby D]

Oh, okay.

[Damaris]

And I was like, that was the first time I laid on the waterbed. It doesn't. It's not as crazy as people think it is. Like, I don't know if y'. All. Have you ever laid on the waterbed?

[Mall]

I have.

[Baby D]

Yeah. I haven't.

[Damaris]

It doesn't move, like, as much as you probably think it does.

[Mall]

Okay, then maybe we're on different waterbeds. My friend's mom had a waterbed, and, yeah, I had. Like, we would play on the waterbed as fun because the would move constantly.

[Damaris]

It moves, but I think people think it moves.

[Mall]

Sleeping on that would have been insane. We used it as, like, a toy.

[Damaris]

Like, it definitely moves.

[Mall]

This was, like, the night, like, mid-90s to late 90s. So I don't know if they improved.

[Baby D]

I never understood the purpose. What was the purpose? Like, is it comfortable?

[Damaris]

It's just like a. Is this like a. Air, Like. Like a. Like the kind of soft. The foam mattresses, the memory foam, it's just kind of the same. The same concept of when you lay down, the mattress just moves to your contours, to your body.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Damaris]

It's kind of the same thing. Thing. But it's like, it definitely moves more than a.

[Baby D]

Regular bed.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Like a memory font definitely moves more than that. Like, my mattress is like. It's like. The whole mattress is like memory foam, but it's not like a waterbed. It's gonna. You're gonna. It's gonna move. Like you feel yourself moving. It's gonna rock a little bit. But I remember the first time I laid on it, I was expecting to be like, feel like I was on a boat. It wasn't.

[Baby D]

It wasn't.

[Mall]

Mal finally got the most powerful iPhone ever. He got the 17 finally so we can move on. It took forever to get him to do that, but thank God Boost Mobile is proving that you don't have to overpay for great wireless. He knows that now with his iPhone. 17 Unlock the savings with $25 a month Forever Unlimited plan Forever permanent price, no grandfathering in all that other contract weird price hiking nonsense. You can keep your phone and your number but you save up $600 a year compared to the major carriers mall. I can't even tell you what I could do with the extra $600.

[Damaris]

We need that extra 600. Listen, stop overpaying and switch to a fair [e-mail] today based on average annual single line payment of AT&T Verizon to T Mobile customers compared to 12 months on the Boost Mobile Unlimited plan as of January 2026. For full offer details visit boostmobile.com.

[Baby D]

This.

[Mall]

Episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. I know it can feel like when you're scrolling through your Instagram that everybody is in love. They're doing gender reveals, engagements, they're going on dates. I know it can get very very tough when you look online. You think everybody is in love. But therapy can also help you find your way and see more clearly where you want to be, especially around the Valentine's Day season. BetterHelp therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the US BetterHelp does the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goals. A short questionnaire helps you identify your needs and preferences and with their 12 plus years of experience, an industry leading match fulfillment rate means they typically get it right the first time, unlike the date that you probably just went on. There are 30,000 therapists waiting for you right now. BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform having served over 6 million people globally. Sign up and get 10% [e-mail] Ross Rory Mole that's better H E L P.com Rorymal support for the show comes.

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[Mall]

That's loseweightnow Co. Every Lenovo is built to let them go. Let them work and rework. Let them animate a dinosaur. No. A toaster.

[Sponsor Announcer]

No.

[Mall]

A hamster and a jetpack.

[Damaris]

Fun.

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Let them put golden wings on a dog.

[Damaris]

Good boy.

[Mall]

Them color correct anywhere and everywhere. Let them make Powered by Intel Core.

[Sponsor Announcer]

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[Damaris]

Lenovo.

[Mall]

How many. How many puppies do you think get abandoned by February? I'll give it 18th. Not even 17?

[Baby D]

You are a terrible person.

[Mall]

I'm. I'm a terrible person. How many dogs do we think are gonna be on the market? We may need to rescue some pups.

[Damaris]

Let's look back in March, though. Let's check in March 5th.

[Mall]

Okay.

[Damaris]

I'm not gonna say fair. I don't think people are that sick. It's June.

[Baby D]

It's. When the summer come, they don't want that damn dog.

[Damaris]

Y' all don't want that responsibility.

[Baby D]

If my Valentine is listening, I would like a puppy for Valentine's Day.

[Damaris]

You would? For real?

[Mall]

It's a lot of responsibility.

[Damaris]

Yeah, baby. Have you owned a dog before?

[Baby D]

I have had a dog every stage of my life. This is my first time not having a dog. Cause my dog died in jail. No.

[Damaris]

Oh, sorry to hear that. I'm talking about, like, your own, though, not the. The family dog. Like, you're crazy.

[Baby D]

I've been living alone.

[Damaris]

Yes.

[Baby D]

No, I haven't had A dog.

[Damaris]

Okay, this. That responsibility is.

[Baby D]

Sorry, go ahead.

[Damaris]

What we saying that responsibility is.

[Mall]

I'm not saying to take your shirt off because that goes against HR but contradicting your shirt right now.

[Baby D]

Anyway, that goes. You said it was a lot of responsibility. Yes, I couldn't bring it here.

[Damaris]

Yeah, sure. Of course you bring a dog here. Wait, what kind of dog is it, though? Is it like a lap dog? Cause don't bring no dog, and it's gonna be knocking over like.

[Baby D]

No, I can't get, like, a golden retriever.

[Damaris]

Hell, no. You ever seen golden retrievers in the house? Them niggas don't know how to sit still for nothing. A golden. They find shit that you didn't even like. They retrieve. They're designed to retrieve and go find shit. You can't have no fucking golden retriever in here.

[Mall]

I think I've seen everything that you could possibly think of in Manhattan in my entire life. I don't think I've ever seen a golden retriever just walking around.

[Damaris]

Hell, no. They need.

[Mall]

Not once have I ever seen a golden retriever just chilling in the city.

[Damaris]

Yeah, no, they need outdoor space. Like, you need to have a house and backyard and. Because they gonna get into some.

[Baby D]

I want a husky, but they talk too much.

[Damaris]

And I said, vacuuming everything every day.

[Baby D]

Damn.

[Damaris]

Yeah, you don't want the husky.

[Baby D]

Ma, you never bought a girl a puppy? No, a fish. Like, in.

[Mall]

Like a fish is crazy. It's gonna die as quick as our relationship.

[Damaris]

But I got short up to her crib with the bat, with the bag, the carnival bag. Showing up to shorty crib with roses and a goldfish in the back.

[Baby D]

At least bring the tank. You gotta at least bring the tank. You can't just put it in a bag. You gotta bring the tank.

[Mall]

That's actually not a bad idea. I might do that. I might get a fish tank and some fish.

[Damaris]

Wait, because I got questions. Do I show up to your door with water in the tank?

[Mall]

No, the tank got to be in the box. You have to be holding the fish in the bag.

[Damaris]

Like, okay, so put the fish that's in the bag in the tank and carry the tank to your door.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

No.

[Baby D]

Fish. Fish in bag. Flowers, one hand tank, other hand tank.

[Damaris]

Like the little bowl?

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

No, you gotta get. That's like solitary confinement for a fish.

[Mall]

There's a reason why bothers die in a day. There's no filter in it.

[Baby D]

It's just as big as the fish.

[Damaris]

Not. It's like you want to have. You want to have, like, enough.

[Mall]

A grouper, a girl, a grouper.

[Damaris]

Yo, but no, but you need to take at least the size of the table, right? Like, so.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

So the fish.

[Baby D]

But I thought you said.

[Mall]

No, but the gift. You could continue to give more to more fish.

[Baby D]

So now every. Every holiday, he buy me another fish. Like a Pandora bracelet.

[Mall]

Yeah, that's kind of cute.

[Damaris]

I didn't know, like, this girl I was dating, she had turtles, and I didn't know that turtles, like, eat goldfish.

[Mall]

Really?

[Baby D]

What?

[Mall]

They only have, like, six hours to do it.

[Damaris]

Turtle was in there. It was. It was flakes all in that. I was like, yo, I didn't know turtles do that.

[Mall]

When I was really young. This was around. I think the soda was surge. So just to put in place what year it was party favors at a friend's birthday party were goldfish in. In a bag. This died before I could get home. Someone just gave a bunch of kids goldfish in a bag.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Somebody else did that. Yeah, it was like a fish. Fish.

[Mall]

Oh, they gave a little bowl, too.

[Damaris]

But they gave it in back. The, like. What do they call the table when it's on the tables?

[Baby D]

Party. Like. I know what you're talking about. Settings.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Whatever the those are called. Yeah. Like, and it was letting people. You could take it home if you wanted to.

[Baby D]

I did that from. For a baby shower. And I kept my fish for, like, a good, like, five, six months. And then my dad told me he was like. Like, one day, he was like, baby, I'm sorry. I went to go check on him, and he was floating on his back. I was so sad.

[Damaris]

Yeah. My nephew had a goldfish that was like. Like, almost lived for two years.

[Mall]

Oh, that's. Submit that.

[Damaris]

That's a record. Yeah. Submit that. It only died when my sister moved to Virginia. Like, she bought the fish from New York to Virginia. Then she got to Virginia.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

She was changing the tank and it died because I guess the water is different. She was like, yo, she put the water, the fish back in the tank, and she was like, it just started going crazy and died.

[Baby D]

How did she, like, explain that to him? Like, how you explain the death of the fish to your child?

[Damaris]

It was like, yo, I don't know. It's. This is time. Can't get in the way with God. I guess just put everything on God. With kids, like, God, you know, he needed a goldfish up there in heaven.

[Mall]

All goldfish go to heaven.

[Damaris]

All goldfish go to heaven. I will say he needed a goldfish.

[Mall]

The. The fish Tank and fish gift could backfire though. Especially if you start buying more of them. Because like, if you guys break up, get this fish out of my house. Like that's a process. That's not just like picking up your shit. I have to take a whole tank out and then I gotta figure out how to transfer this fish. Like, no, I'm not doing that. Even if you give a cat or a dog that's easy to just get in the car. Come on. She doesn't like us anymore.

[Damaris]

That's a lot easier than water transferring water to your ex's house.

[Mall]

Get these fish out my house. I be like, yo, can you give me the weekend? I have to prepare for this.

[Baby D]

Yeah, cuz people don't really become attached to fish like that. For real. Like, I don't know if like my ex give me a fish, I'm going be fighting with him for custody of the fish. Take the fish.

[Damaris]

Fighting over the fish.

[Mall]

That's hilarious.

[Damaris]

Girl called me, like, can I have my fish? You can definitely come get this fish. I don't give a about this fish.

[Mall]

But if you're in an argument, like you can in anger just grab your hoodies. Like I'm getting the out here. Imagine trying to with the net. Like trying to pissed off, trying to catch and then the fish swimming away. Yo, that would be just sitting there.

[Damaris]

Like.

[Baby D]

That would piss me clean the off, bro.

[Mall]

You just sitting there like an idiot, all angry. She's just looking at you, trying to.

[Damaris]

Take your fish back as well. Keep the fish, man. Let that girl have it.

[Baby D]

Or if we live together and you got some like a snake. But I ain't even with nobody that.

[Damaris]

Own like snakes and shit like that. Like, is it time they want attention? What's wrong with people that own snakes? Like, what's like, what's up with those people? Why do you own a snake? Like, what you doing? Your house smell funny all the time. Cause you go in somebody's crib, you know when they own like an exotic pet, you can smell it from the door.

[Mall]

And I don't really feel like you're an animal lover like that. Like, fish are kind of retarded. So if you put them in a good sized tank, they're none the wiser. A snake isn't that dumb. You put them in a little ass. That's abuse to me.

[Damaris]

Why do you own a who a snake?

[Baby D]

I know, like, you can't even play with that. It don't fetch, it don't do nothing. The you got a snake for that's.

[Damaris]

Just weird owner snakes like that. That. That whole. The lizards, those people. And they all got the same aesthetic. People that own snakes and lizards and like that. They all look alike.

[Mall]

There's one bad bitch that we both know that that threw me off when I found out she had a snake. Because she didn't have any. She wasn't a snake with traits. Like. She didn't have any of the traits. You would think.

[Baby D]

She didn't have gauges. She didn't. Nope.

[Mall]

None of that shit. It threw me off. But then, like, the more I got to know her, I was like, oh, your personality is like this. Because I'm with. I'm with Damaris of the one attention thing. Because I never even understood the people that stood in Times Square in the summer with a snake. Everyone that's out there doing shit to get attention from tourists is bared for months money. The snake guy just there, like, you just there, like. They not, you know, it's a dollar to hold the snake. Nah, they just be standing there with a sleeveless leather vest on and just like, going like this and shit.

[Damaris]

Yeah. And everybody that owns a snake got their tongue pissed. You ever noticed that? That's like a telltale sign a girl got a tongue pierced. She definitely owns a snake. In 2026, she owns a snake or lizard. One of the other little. Whatever you want to call it. Komodo dragon.

[Baby D]

Komodo dragons.

[Damaris]

She owns one of those.

[Baby D]

The little Komodo dragons are cute. I don't. With reptiles. Don't bring no reptile around me, but the Komodo dragons are cute.

[Damaris]

You know what a Komodo dragon is?

[Baby D]

Oh, no.

[Damaris]

Pull up a Komodo dragon.

[Caller]

No, no.

[Damaris]

Pull up a Komodo dragon. Let me know.

[Mall]

It's what inspired Godzilla.

[Damaris]

Let me know if you walked in somebody's house and they had a Komodo dragon.

[Mall]

Dragons have done to the Asian population.

[Baby D]

The little dragons. What are they called?

[Damaris]

No, dragonflies.

[Mall]

Gecko.

[Baby D]

Whatever. I'm gonna look it up, you guys.

[Damaris]

A lizard.

[Mall]

A chameleon little lizard. I think you're thinking of the Camille. The one that can, like, look everywhere.

[Baby D]

No, the one that can look everywhere is. But they have, like, little pet, like, dragons, because my friend had one and they're called dragons, but they're not. Obviously not the Komodo dragons, but whatever.

[Damaris]

I think you just saw a gecko.

[Mall]

Nobody has a pet Komodo dragon.

[Damaris]

No.

[Mall]

They're literally, I think, on one island in the whole world.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

And it's illegal to go there.

[Baby D]

Whatever. It's Fine. But, yeah, those people are. Oh, Chinese water dragons. That's what they're called.

[Damaris]

Chinese water dragons.

[Mall]

That's what brought covert over here.

[Damaris]

That's it. Yeah, Yeah. I would just call that a lizard. Yeah, yeah, that's a lizard.

[Mall]

More or less.

[Damaris]

I don't know. I'm not the amphibian fam. I don't know about the amphibians like.

[Mall]

That, but you could find those.

[Damaris]

You could catch those or the reptiles.

[Mall]

Fort Lauderdale by yourself if you want.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah, Those.

[Mall]

They run in the parking lot.

[Damaris]

They've been falling out the trees because it was so cold in Florida.

[Baby D]

Really?

[Damaris]

Yeah. You didn't see that? People were just collecting. They are falling out the trees. Peace.

[Baby D]

Yeah, but mall, I agree with you. Frogs, turtles, all that. Like.

[Damaris]

Like, who owns a frog?

[Baby D]

Be having frogs?

[Damaris]

Nobody owns no frog before.

[Baby D]

Huh? Peach look like he had a.

[Damaris]

You had a turtle. Peach. Peach would own a turtle.

[Mall]

What was his name?

[Damaris]

He didn't even love his turtle. Leonardo. It definitely was Leonardo.

[Mall]

I was watching Tires with Shane Gillis, and he had a turtle named Jerome Bettis.

[Damaris]

Holding a turtle is wild.

[Baby D]

Never understood that. I used to think people just wanted attention, but then I realized people want something that they don't really have to pay that much attention to.

[Mall]

Well, snakes you can bring outside to scare people, and that's where you can get your attention. Like, oh, I'm a snake guy. A turtle. You like. You just bring a turtle out in the street. Yo, what you doing with a turtle?

[Damaris]

Only Puerto Ricans bring their snakes outside, like, during a parade, and they take pictures. Yeah, that's like a Puerto Rican thing. Puerto Ricans love that.

[Mall]

All right. Did the goth Puerto Rico surprised Bad.

[Damaris]

Bunny didn't come out with a turtle snake around his neck for the Super Bowl?

[Mall]

That it would check out, though.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Everyone be like, that's culture.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Come on, man.

[Mall]

Is there still goth Puerto Ricans in the Bronx? Because that was absolutely. In, like, the early 2010s, that was like they was running the Bronx.

[Damaris]

Absolutely. They keep. They. They keep swords on them and like.

[Mall]

Yes, exactly.

[Damaris]

Trench coat in the summer, it's like, who is this man? This.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Going this crib straight Puerto Rican. Like, I thought she was white all this time.

[Mall]

Like, yo, when I would be on Christopher street, like, at the Tattoo Spy, be nothing but Puerto Rican goths from the Bronx.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mall]

Like, yo, what you doing this far downtown, dog? Only when the sun is down.

[Damaris]

They'Re night walkers. Only when the sun goes down.

[Mall]

They have to be back to the Bronx by Sunrise or they melt. Yo, the Puerto Rican God epidemic in New York City. They be back to the Bronx by.

[Damaris]

Sunrise, or else they turn back into a Puerto Rican.

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Mall]

They used to terrorize. They walk around with, like, tasers. Not for safety or anything.

[Damaris]

Ah.

[Mall]

Just. Just.

[Damaris]

They tase themselves. They listen to that music. You know, they getting up together in the park, and they just tase each other.

[Baby D]

They tase each other.

[Damaris]

They be in the park.

[Mall]

Tase each other.

[Damaris]

It's definitely.

[Mall]

It's like the intense kids that play Quidditch in the park. Like, that's. That's the gang version of it. Yo.

[Damaris]

And. And those group of Puerto Ricans, the God Puerto Rican, they do everything in the same shoes. They play ball. They go to the club, they go to on a date with the same boots on. Like, they don't give a. And it was, like, awesome Rebounders, like, the God Puerto Ricans, they led the Bronx. Oh, they led the Bronx to rebound.

[Mall]

That's such a good point. They were talented at pretty much everything.

[Damaris]

Hell, yeah.

[Mall]

And for some reason, especially in that era, they would pull bitches. Yeah. Like they always had. They were always with a girl that had no business being with them. Like, you would never assume that girl would be with him.

[Damaris]

You could tell when a guy Puerto Rican had a date. All he did was slick his hair back.

[Mall]

Oh, 100%. He just turned into a greaser.

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Mall]

That's all you would do. He be. He'd be pony boy for the day. You like, where you going?

[Damaris]

He got his hair slick. He's on a date. Yeah.

[Mall]

He getting his west side Story bag.

[Damaris]

He let his head down when it was time to play handball. Hey, I'm Puerto Rican, so I could talk this. I don't give a. I get my.

[Mall]

Off and I'm racist.

[Damaris]

Oh, my God.

[Mall]

Anyways, where are we at with Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day plans?

[Damaris]

Peas, Goth Puerto Ricans gift for Valentine. They buy you a snake. Yo. They show up with a little ass snake wrapped around their wrist.

[Mall]

They'd be at the altar with that snake around their wrist for sure.

[Damaris]

Oh, my God. Wow. I didn't know we was gonna talk about goth Puerto Ricans today. That's hilarious.

[Mall]

Epidemic.

[Baby D]

That.

[Mall]

That isn't. And I don't see them anymore.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Like, did Bloomberg get rid of them? Who got rid of the Puerto Rican?

[Damaris]

Didn't, Mom? Donnie sure will.

[Baby D]

Yep.

[Mall]

No, he might bring him back.

[Damaris]

My bad. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

[Mall]

Or do we think, like, the popping Dominicans just. Just took Over. Because I. I just. I stopped seeing after 2013. I didn't see Puerto Rican cops.

[Damaris]

You don't see Dominican Goths?

[Mall]

No.

[Damaris]

God, I've never seen a Dominican Goth. That's not a thing. Puerto rican gods, 100 dominicans down.

[Mall]

Give it some time, though. Because Puerto Ricans were in New York for so long that they had to start to evolve.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mall]

And other things. Give Dominicans a few more years, they.

[Damaris]

Might get there, they might catch on.

[Mall]

They'll be sick of La Marina and start to figure out what the Lower east side is like.

[Damaris]

Yeah, it's no Goth's indictment. No, no. That sound like a movie. No Goth's indictment.

[Baby D]

Yo, what is wrong with y'?

[Damaris]

All?

[Mall]

The name of Fab's next mixtape that he puts out on Halloween.

[Damaris]

No Goths and Dyman now playing.

[Mall]

Oh, all right. Anyways, Jill Scott Print. That's. That's our Valentine's Day plans. Well, Damaris won't tell us hers, so.

[Damaris]

Well, I'm gonna check in with you abd tomorrow just to make sure you're having a good day.

[Baby D]

Well, tomorrow's okay. Yeah. Yeah.

[Damaris]

You know what I'm saying.

[Baby D]

You could check in with me Sunday.

[Mall]

Nah.

[Damaris]

Cause Sunday you might be. You know, that might be recovery day for you. Yeah, you might add a long night stretching. No, no, because Sunday is like an easy. Sunday's an easy going. You chill, everybody, relax.

[Baby D]

I don't wanna hear from my boss on Sunday. I'll see you Monday when I come into work.

[Damaris]

All right, cool. That's a bet. All right, bet. All right. Well, we got some Valentine's Day voicemails.

[Baby D]

Baby D. We do.

[Damaris]

You've got mail.

[Mall]

And of course, this is sponsored by Boost Mobile, the phone line for lovers and friends. Everybody knows that you can have your ring back to be lovers and friends for free right now. Use code Rory and Moost mobile dot com.

[Damaris]

Yo, what up, Damaris Mall. Rory, I want everybody opinion on this. So I'm beefing with my girl about going out on Valentine's today. King, I'm nothing. I don't want to be outside amongst all these people fighting and competing for the same type of shit, right? We going out to dinner, everybody trying to get the same meal. We all fighting with our servers and shit. I feel like every time I've gone on a Valentine's Day, it's ended in an argument or it's ended with me being upset at my service at dinner. Or, you know, there's also little events out here in the west side in Cali. You can do some stuff. But man, I've never had an experience that I felt like was worth my money. Another thing, on the day, it's Saturday, they gonna be taxing hella. So I'm gonna get to the point. My whole suggestion was, yo, let's just go out on Sunday. Saturday we could, you know, we could kick back, do the thing in the crib. And then Sunday, let's. You know what I'm saying? Let's enjoy the day. Let's enjoy each other. She not fucking with that at all. And I'm like, from a woman's perspective, what the fuck is the difference? I'm gonna keep it just to that peace.

[Mall]

To me, that's proper logic. I'm not gonna say man logic, because man logic is just actual logic. Female logic is we have to do it the same day as all the mother hoes.

[Baby D]

I mean, it's Valentine's Day. Not the day after Valentine's Day.

[Damaris]

It's not Valentine's weekend. It could be.

[Baby D]

It could be.

[Damaris]

Should be.

[Baby D]

It should be.

[Mall]

I'm with him. The only way to escape this is try to find something creative where a bunch of people are not going to be. But if you want to do the dinner date shit, that is a real thing though, I agree. Especially if you're in a major city. Like, dog, nobody's trying to go out and do this for what. It's not even an enjoyable experience when you're on top of everybody.

[Damaris]

I tell people all the time, Valentine's Day and Mother's Day are probably the worst days to try to go out and get dinner reservations. And this, that it's just everybody. We love moms, we love our partners and all of that. But especially if you're in a major city, it is a lot to be moving around in that type of traffic. You go to a restaurant, you could have reservations. But it's like, you get there, your table might not be ready on time for your reservation. You have to wait. Then when you do get your table, the server is packed. So the server is like, you gotta know, get everything in now, order everything now. Don't keep calling for the server. Cause she's working 10 other tables. Like, then the traffic, like driving it is a lot to move around on those days. So. But how do we get around that? How do we say, babe, look, all right, we don't want to be out with the rush. Can we do the day before Valentine's Day? Can we do the day after Valentine's Day? Like, there has to be, you know, we don't have to go out for Valentine's Day, but we'll do something nice at home. Whether it's flowers or, you know, maybe even try to go get a massage somewhere. Even though that might be another thing too, another headache. But like, dinner restaurants, we gotta find an alternative to kind of try to avoid that rush and having to sit and deal with that traffic on Valentine's Day.

[Baby D]

So what I told my homeboy, because me and my homeboy had this conversation when he was talking about doing something special for Valentine's Day. He had the same issue as him. The day after is going to be just as busy and so is the day before. Like, let's just be honest. So that's not avoiding anything. If you want to do something at home, you got to make it special. And this is where men's creativity, or lack thereof can fail them. Because women love super cute shit. If she knew that in the house, you were gonna decorate the house and make it look all types of crazy. And then like, you guys go and you go and pick up her favorite food or hire a chef to come and make her favorite food. There's ways around that. There's ways to make it special, but you have to put a lot of effort and like, creativity into it. And not just, we'll go to dinner tomorrow.

[Mall]

Like, okay, this sounds like a really respectable and amazing man. Man. Speaking as one as well. Sometimes it's tough when you do that on the regular. Because now it's just another day. Like, I've set up the house, I've cooked. I've done all that. Like just on a Tuesday.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Now it's Valentine's. Like, now it's definitely my bad.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

And it's only for selfish reasons. So we don't need to leave.

[Baby D]

Pick me.

[Mall]

Pick me. I'm. I'm. I can't be picked.

[Baby D]

That's like, you know, I do that on the regular. You know, I do.

[Mall]

You know, that's light work for me.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

So that's where it gets tough when you know, you're somebody as incredible as I am that it's hard to top just a regular day. Yeah. So, you know, it's either. It's either Turks or. Or this. I don't even know. Yeah.

[Baby D]

Yeah. Sir. Feel that.

[Mall]

No, but I'm dead ass. I really have done, like the set up the whole house cook. Like, I do that. Not. Not on some pick me show. Some regular. Like when I'm in a relationship and someone's coming home from work. Like, you know what? Let Me. Let me set up the house. Let me. Let me get the. The Nerf guns together. Let me do like, we did the Naughty Elf for Christmas, where you do all the. The funny scenario. Like, I'd like to do that type of stuff in general in the house. Especially when you have a kid, there's only so much you can do. Yeah. So that makes it even tougher when you have to get creative for the in the house setup type of thing. Like. Like, I built a fort for Amar's birthday just for, you know, because we built forts.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Can't build a fort for Valentine's Day.

[Damaris]

You can, sir.

[Baby D]

If you're thinking of what to do, Phil, fill the. Fill the bedroom with balloons. And when I say fill it, I don't mean four balloons. I don't mean ten balloons. Fill the bedroom with balloons. Like, you know when you walk in a balloon section at Dollar Tree and it's on balloons. Balloons floating to the ceiling. Do that. Put roses all over the house.

[Mall]

Like, go now.

[Baby D]

Make it. Yeah, go now. All over. Make it a thing. Like, make it. What would look extra to y' all is the type that girls like. Make it a thing. Then put her gifts in the middle of the bed around the rose petals, and buy her her favorite food. Go pick it up. Or make it. Like, there's a way to do it without just. Yeah, we'll just go to dinner tomorrow.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Baby D]

There's no creativity in that.

[Mall]

Sometimes a staycation, like, you could get a nice hotel for a reasonable price just for one night.

[Baby D]

Not on Val. That one night is not going to be Valentine's Day.

[Mall]

I don't know if he's in the. Like, I don't know where he's at, but, yeah, for some places. Yeah, you do. Like a staycation.

[Damaris]

And he's in Cali.

[Mall]

Well, I mean, it's like, what, the third biggest state? I don't know.

[Damaris]

Yeah, you got to go.

[Mall]

I don't know what that means.

[Damaris]

You got to go further out. You got to go further out. Just find a hotel further out.

[Mall]

Is he in Barstow or in West Hollywood?

[Damaris]

Yeah, no, West Hollywood. You can forget about it.

[Mall]

Yeah, no, for sure. And at that point, a staycation doesn't even mean anything. But if you're in, like, a certain small town and want to drive 30 minutes, like, I think that's kind of cool.

[Damaris]

Yeah, that could be cool.

[Mall]

Find a hotel with. With a bathtub. You may trust dust and, you know, get some rose petals and that. That could only run you 300 bucks.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Get some Nice takeout. I think that's a cool way.

[Damaris]

Yeah, it's a cool substitute. I'm not mad at that.

[Baby D]

And if you want to go to dinner the next day, just make sure for Valentine's Day, do something. Like, however many years y' all been together, write her a love letter for each year y' all been together, like, or something like that.

[Mall]

Get.

[Baby D]

Create. Like, just get creative. Like, girls just want the effort. The dinner is not. If you think that that food is. What the fuck she gives a fuck about on Valentine's Day. It's not.

[Damaris]

Not.

[Baby D]

It's the effort.

[Mall]

She's one of those that likes to Instagram the plate. Then you got to focus on that.

[Damaris]

And Chanel never hurt. So if you can.

[Baby D]

I don't think that he's talking about that type of girl.

[Damaris]

I'm just saying you get something. You get a perfume from Chanel. You get something. Just the box. Once they see this, the box, the Chanel box, like, you know, all is forgiven no matter what. It is just Chanel. He went to Chanel for me.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Mall]

All men should. Should invest in a projector. That's the cheat code. They're that are affordable. You can bring them to random locations and you can watch and it becomes a whole romantic date. If you can find an outlet and a projector and a space that it can project on. The sky is the fucking limit.

[Damaris]

Just have all your pictures together and memories.

[Mall]

Flip it right over to whatever you want to watch. Projector is a cheat code.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

It gives you so many options to be creative.

[Baby D]

Make her a playlist full of all the songs that remind you of her, even if you lying am. Let's make our playlist for all the songs.

[Mall]

You really thinking of Eminem, Puke. But you put something else.

[Baby D]

You cool.

[Damaris]

We have another voicemail.

[Baby D]

We do. Hey, what's up, y'?

[Mall]

All?

[Baby D]

It's Taylor. I have a question. What do you do? It's Valentine's Day. You're dating multiple women.

[Mall]

I was.

[Sponsor Announcer]

How.

[Mall]

I was just about to say. Taylor's going to say this.

[Baby D]

Yeah. Let's just say two. You feeling both of them? You've been talking to them, both of them about maybe equal amount of time. Which one do you choose to do Valentin Valentine's Day with?

[Mall]

Do you split the day up?

[Baby D]

That's do like, which one will get, like, the side chick Valentine's Day. How do you determine who gets the day? If you pretty. You like them both equally. But how do you figure this out? Let me know.

[Damaris]

Oh, that's easy. Whoever's not on their period. I'm sorry, Baby D. I didn't mean to.

[Baby D]

It's okay. It's okay.

[Mall]

Choose neither. Kill a grandparent and then spread it out next week.

[Baby D]

Split the day.

[Mall]

Split the day Is the sick. That's sicker than what Mole said and what I said.

[Damaris]

Whoever has the best sex.

[Baby D]

Jesus. That's what I said. Is sicker than what he said.

[Mall]

Splitting the day is nuts. Cause you're gonna fuck both of them.

[Damaris]

Splitting the day is crazy.

[Baby D]

Not everybody fucks their Valentines.

[Damaris]

Oh, you fucking on who?

[Mall]

It's the point of the day.

[Damaris]

Who ain't getting sex on Valentine's Day?

[Baby D]

You don't know if Taylor is sleeping with both of these people.

[Damaris]

I know Taylor.

[Mall]

I know her personally.

[Damaris]

Yeah, you don't know Taylor like I know she's.

[Mall]

You don't know Baby D. You don't.

[Damaris]

Know Baby D. She's having sex on Valentine's Day. Yeah. No, you go with the one I guess that has cuz you like one of them more. Let's just be clear.

[Baby D]

She said this equal.

[Damaris]

We have to go like, you don't like. No, you don't even like your kids equally.

[Baby D]

Y.

[Damaris]

Let's just be real. Let's just keep it real. You don't even love your kids. You got multiple kids. It's so you be like, yo, he going to be the one that's going to piss you me off the most. He gonna go to prison. He's gonna make it. She gonna be a hoe. You know, your kids like whoever you like more, whoever you have more of an attraction to, whoever you have more fun with, Whoever like, you enjoy the time with more. That's who you pick on Valentine's Day.

[Mall]

Because I know Taylor very well. I think she's saying she likes them equally because she knows which one she likes more and that's the one she shouldn't be liking more.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mall]

She's keeping the other one around because that's probably the best, better one for long term.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mall]

Taylor liked the one she shouldn't be with.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mall]

So she just said, equal. N. Go. Go be with the demon, Taylor.

[Damaris]

Yeah. You know who got the best head.

[Baby D]

If you not gonna split the day, then you just gotta make yourself unavailable and then do something honest.

[Mall]

How do you split a the whole. All right, so what split the day?

[Damaris]

We doing breakfast, dinner with the other one.

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Yo, if I go. If a girl told my shoes, I actually be my Valentine's. And she said, yeah, but we can only do something for breakfast?

[Baby D]

No, you just say, you know, hey, okay. I actually, I have to go hang out with my mom. She said, you know, it's my grandmother's birthday on Valentine's Day.

[Damaris]

Who is that working on?

[Baby D]

I'm only available until five o'. Clock. I feel like from. From five. Oh, Taylor, that's what you do the 13th. Spend the night with the one that's for the day. Because then you can start on the 13th night, you could do dinner. Y' all wake up together. Y' all wake up together on Valentine's Day.

[Mall]

Y' all wait till midnight and y' all good.

[Baby D]

Wait till exactly.

[Damaris]

And you're gonna leave on Valentine's Day.

[Baby D]

We spent. We've been together all night.

[Damaris]

We wake up just working on.

[Mall]

And then 5pm on Valentine's Day.

[Damaris]

What do you have to do?

[Baby D]

I gotta work.

[Damaris]

I just at the top of the show, I said I gotta go to. I'm light them lighting the show for you.

[Baby D]

I don't feel like a woman will complain if she was with you the night of the 13th. Woke up with you on the 14th.

[Damaris]

Baby, you're a woman. You ain't going for that.

[Baby D]

Well, I'm a little different.

[Damaris]

No, you're just a woman. Like, ain't no woman. Your man spent the night with you on the 13th. The day of the 14th. My. Yo, I gotta 5 o'.

[Mall]

Clock.

[Damaris]

I gotta be out of here. God ain't working. That's your baby. Don't sit tail up. That's not work. That is terrible.

[Baby D]

Make it special. Well, first of all, that's not her girlfriend. This is the thing. She's dating these people a girlfriend, that's different. There's certain expectations.

[Damaris]

So this is dating.

[Baby D]

You dating two people. You a person who likes you, who you're just dating will be happy to wake up with you on the 14th. Y' all went to dinner the 13th, wake up on the 14th. Y' All Together all day and then she leaves later. Is she probably leaving to go link another? Yes, right? We all this is in our head. But that's not my girl. I can't say nothing about it. And on top of that, she made my last day and my day so perfect. Everything is so perfect. Then what can I do? You tell you I give really good.

[Damaris]

Gifts, baby D Leaving on Valentine's Day is never the option. Option. That's never the option. I don't care if you spent the night with me on the 13th. It's the 14th. Where are you going? We got mad to do today. Like we Got mad to do like, we got a what? You're not leaving on the 4th. That's Valentine's Day at like 8pm that's even worse. 8pm restaurants are still open. This got a neck full of cologne waiting on you. The other. You're not going nowhere at 8 o' clock on Valentine.

[Baby D]

Full of cologne. So funny.

[Mall]

You nasty. If you leave at 8 to go link someone else. No time for a shower.

[Baby D]

You have mad time for a shower. You could make dinner plans at 10pm in New York.

[Damaris]

See Baby D. No.

[Mall]

And picturing. I don't care if that's your queen. Somebody you just picturing that person running to their house to shower to change into. Redo her makeup. Just to go.

[Baby D]

Taylor's not redoing her makeup. Taylor is. Taylor. Taylor is changing out straps and going to the next.

[Damaris]

She got the other strap on in the crock pot.

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Baby D]

Brush your teeth. Change Dixies and. And change dickies.

[Damaris]

Dickies is crazy. Change dickies.

[Mall]

Don't put that on.

[Damaris]

Change. Change your dicky. Swap your dickies out and change your.

[Mall]

Jersey from home to away.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Change your jersey and they go link the other dude. That's crazy.

[Baby D]

Other girl, but.

[Damaris]

Yeah, other girl. I'm sorry.

[Baby D]

Yeah, I felt. Taylor, if. If that's what you want to do. If not, just say you're not available and don't do nothing for neither. Buy gifts, man.

[Damaris]

Taylor, who got the better set sex. That's who you roll with. The Valentine's Day is made for good sex. If your sex whack, you probably home watching reruns of I don't know if you ain't got no good box. Let's just keep real on Valentine's Day. Valentine's Day show with a box of chocolate sweets. Who got the sweetest box?

[Baby D]

That was a crazy cor. Okay.

[Damaris]

Who got the sweetest box?

[Mall]

I was just laughing at you, trying to think of what shows watch.

[Damaris]

You know what show they watch in. No. They watch West Coast Customs. And. You know, they got to know how to swap out the carburetor.

[Mall]

Oh, my God.

[Damaris]

Deadliest Cat. Yeah. Deadliest Catch. They watch like that, man. Come on, man. You know what they watch. That's what they said.

[Baby D]

West Coast.

[Damaris]

You know what dykes watch, man.

[Baby D]

All right. I feel like we help Taylor. Taylor, we gave you a couple options. If you're not gonna spend it with either of them because you want to play it safe, you better spend some money on some good gifts. I feel like that's always safe.

[Mall]

Just spread it out don't 14th show both of them. You're not doing nothing but that updated send them for y'. All. I'm doing this show that you're not with nobody doing nothing and then spread it out.

[Baby D]

But that shows that you don't like me.

[Mall]

No, you I'm busy. You just said to show the construction site. I don't know. I had to work today.

[Damaris]

Taylor, listen. Just do what all single do on Valentine's Day. Stay home and binge watch dog the mout hunter. You'll be fine. Watch this darkness all around you. The criminals are on the road.

[Mall]

Did you know Taylor was definitely, definitely doing for the dog?

[Damaris]

The big bad dog, the bounty hunter. That's what all dykes the single dice do.

[Baby D]

Oh my God.

[Damaris]

They binge dog the bounty hunter, man. Come on, man. Rest in peace to Beth, man.

[Mall]

And for anybody offended, I'm sure Taylor thought that joke was hilarious.

[Damaris]

Taylor know I love her. She knows I love her. That's hilarious. As do y.

[Mall]

One more.

[Baby D]

Yes, we do.

[Damaris]

I don't know if we need it, but let's do it.

[Baby D]

Oh my God, bro.

[Damaris]

Yo, this is Josh from all over. All right, Josh.

[Mall]

I'm always on the road until I.

[Damaris]

Find a reason to call someplace my hometown type. I'mma just get into it though.

[Baby D]

Josh was a rolling stone.

[Damaris]

Clearly sickening. Beauty the hole in your stomach. Cuz you're not the one holding her beauty. The wicked beauty that bewitches knowing the headaches caused with numerous hypothetical thoughts that now run through it. Damn. And beauty because you were a follower of Christ now hurling curses to the father. Why is this blessing so far and now to preach? And why the am I not favored to be up under her deathly beautiful? Because life without is bland and abysmal. And I didn't see true light until I was blinded by you. And yet you're all I see. Profound beauty. Because only amused can arouse, stimulate and amuse such abstractly unique praises from within. As if she were my nervous system itself. Forming these involuntary movements that move me beyond recognition.

[Baby D]

Mission.

[Damaris]

She is truly beautiful. Happy Valentine's Day, baby.

[Baby D]

D.

[Damaris]

Hey, Vic. Men, if you don't get the out of here.

[Mall]

You know he picked an orange before he started that.

[Damaris]

I heard you peeling that orange, Vic. Don't be calling here under the name Josh. That's Vic. Men. Get the out of here with this man.

[Baby D]

Oh my God, Josh. Thank you. Thank you for that. Wonderful.

[Mall]

Now you, Taylor, you juggling too? This is second Valentine's Day.

[Damaris]

You guys.

[Mall]

A poem.

[Damaris]

Damn, Josh.

[Mall]

Kind of ate, too.

[Damaris]

He ate.

[Mall]

What was homie's name last year?

[Baby D]

I don't remember. There was a couple last year. And then the dude that we played on Halloween too, That's Vic.

[Damaris]

Men that just called in him. I ain't no Josh. I know Vic.

[Mall]

He went kind of crazy.

[Baby D]

Josh went kind of crazy. Josh, can you do me a favor? Can you type out the lyrics for that or. Type out.

[Damaris]

Type out the lyrics.

[Baby D]

Type out the words for that and send it to me just so I can make sure I catch every word.

[Mall]

That was off the dome. He don't write his rhymes.

[Damaris]

Come on, man. Vic don't do that.

[Mall]

He blacked out. That left him. He didn't.

[Damaris]

That left him.

[Mall]

You know that.

[Damaris]

Just. You know, we can't repeat that, baby. That cannot. That'll never be done again. That'll. You'll never hear that again.

[Baby D]

Well, I appreciate you, Josh, but yeah, I would love to see that written out on paper. So if you can please DM it me.

[Damaris]

I mean, that's how I feel about a lot of Ghostface raps. I need to see them shits written down.

[Mall]

Never have. All right. I mean, with how beautiful that was. He did start by saying that he's. He's always on the road. Sounds like he can't really commit. Is this something you would want to take seriously?

[Baby D]

Who said that he can't commit? I don't require a lot of in person time.

[Damaris]

Baby D. Make him commit and submit.

[Mall]

I don't require a lot of personal time. You just said he had to fly you to London cuz he was changing.

[Damaris]

Y' all still listening to Baby D? Cuz I don't.

[Baby D]

I know.

[Mall]

World's best ex boyfriend and then called him a dog on this episode.

[Baby D]

Listen, I don't require a lot of personal time. So, Josh, if you're always on the road, you know, if you're interested in courting me, it's going to cost you.

[Damaris]

More than people that Vic M. All that does is give Baby D more time to be with the next. That's all I do.

[Baby D]

Oh, my God. Why are you painting me out to be like that? That's crazy. Don't do that.

[Damaris]

There's a lot of people listen to this podcast when they. When girls do that. Lying. Yeah, cuz lies, lies. You got to go to another octave.

[Mall]

What would you think two poets being in the same house, would you guys battle a lot? Like, how would. How would. Arguments.

[Damaris]

All they going to do is leave notes on the fridge once they leave. Baby D definitely leave notes on the fridge.

[Baby D]

No, I send. I send text message notes. And by the way, I just find it funny how the. The door ain't even locked. I just find it funny how.

[Damaris]

Yo dating Baby D. Got to be hell, I don't care what none of y' all say Gotta be. You know, I just find it funn. I just woke up. The first words I got to read for my girl is I find it funny how.

[Mall]

Yeah. Oh, my God, no. And then it rhymes.

[Baby D]

I'm definitely not. No, don't worry about. Nothing's wrong.

[Damaris]

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Baby D]

Nothing's wrong.

[Damaris]

Men know better than that. You hear there's nothing wrong. Everything is wrong. You better start checking, double checking it.

[Baby D]

Don't worry about it.

[Damaris]

Don't worry about it. It's cool. Don't worry about it. It's never been cool.

[Baby D]

Hotter than a spoon in a crackhouse.

[Damaris]

It's cool. No, it ain't no worry.

[Mall]

And today's show is brought to you by our presenting sponsor, Hard Rock bet. Florida Sportsbook Mall. The big game has passed. There is no more. NFL season's over, but still we rise. We rise. Still. I rise every single time. Because we still have hoops. We got college hoops. We got hockey. Because I know you're a huge Rangers fan. We will be just fine. And did you know Hard Rock Bet is the official sports betting part partner of the Miami Heat and the Orlando Magic.

[Damaris]

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[Mall]

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[Damaris]

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[Mall]

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[Mall]

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[Baby D]

See Terms. We have another. We have another voice mode. Do you guys want to hear?

[Damaris]

Of course.

[Baby D]

Let's see.

[Caller]

Good morning. It's your boy Dribble. Live in the Bahamas. So, long story short, I met this girl on Facebook. We chatting it up, matching it up.

[Baby D]

Cool.

[Caller]

I asked us like, how old are you? She's like 23. At the time, I was 29. I just turned 30. So it's like a six, seven year gap. I got a number when we text, and I'm like, you know what? Let me take you on a date on Friday. You know, we got to eat. You can go down tonight. It was a club bar or something. You know, something like. She's like, all right, cool. So Friday, come. We've been texting all day. She went. She went ghost for like, a couple hours. And, like, I'll. Before the day, she like, yo, yo, you know, I want to bring my friend on a date and like, does she have her own boyfriend? It's gonna be like a double date. She beating us there. Like, what type of. Type of situation? She's like, nah, just a come.

[Damaris]

Just to come.

[Caller]

She got just to come money. Like, who gonna be paying for this extra mouth? I ain't really equipped for this. So I end up dead. Not because I was like. I felt like they were trying to get a free meal out of me, and I was like nine. So I texted back. I. It's like, I don't really feel comfortable with your friend being about. We trying to get to know each other, you know, our first. Really first meet up, you know, thought it was going to be kind of intimate. Mind you, I wasn't trying to smash none of that.

[Mall]

Yeah, you were.

[Caller]

And I just talked to my sisters and some of my homegirls. I like this got to be a young ho situation. Like, there's got to be that the young hoes do the way they want to bring their friend everywhere with them. It's like how they say smokers got to smoke before they do everything. Young hoes got to bring their friend with them everywhere. So my question to y' all is, what age? What younger age y' all comfortable dating legally?

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Mall]

How he get there?

[Damaris]

He said all of that to get.

[Mall]

Back to wrapping up that whole story.

[Damaris]

Well, I think he fumbled.

[Mall]

That's what I thought.

[Damaris]

That might have been a Tracy waiting to happen.

[Mall]

That's what I thought.

[Baby D]

Tracy.

[Mall]

I thought the tricycle was wheeling its way down.

[Damaris]

I think you might have, bro. He might have fumbled that. That might have been the Tracy waiting to Happen or you know, it's a thing where women. First time meeting you, she's. She does not comfortable being alone. She want to have a friend there with her. Like y' all could have did something light. You could have went to like a nice little lounge or something.

[Mall]

So maybe I misunderstood. It sounded like they had went on a date to eat in a club.

[Baby D]

Club.

[Mall]

And then there was the restaurant with the friends.

[Baby D]

No, he's saying, he's saying that that's the plan.

[Damaris]

This was a first hand. This was their first link.

[Mall]

So I feel him though I, I would be fine with it, but I see his perspective. I'd kind of be like, I mean, all right, whatever. It's our first date. It's not like we have any type of label or any real understanding. If your friend want to come, then we just link it.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but he, he didn't want to do that.

[Mall]

No, I understand why he wouldn't.

[Baby D]

It seems like a money thing for him. Which I could. Which I understand it. It is kind of like to just ask somebody to like pay for you and your friend is, you know, that can be a. That's extra.

[Damaris]

You live in the Bahamas. All you got to do is go to the beach, grab three coconuts and it's lit. What are you talking about? Mall that don't come if you don't.

[Baby D]

Reach in there and pull out a fish.

[Damaris]

If you don't climb that tree and get them three coconuts right there. Have a good time.

[Mall]

But a walk on the beach to them isn't the same as it is to us.

[Damaris]

Yeah, no, walk on the beach is like a walk on the subway platform. Yeah. It's like, bro, we do this every day. Like this is nothing special.

[Mall]

I be money aside there. Like let's take the money factor out of it. If I was had met a girl on Facebook, he said, right? And I was like, yo, let's, let's get to know each other or do you want to go out to eat or something? And we started texting. She was like, oh, I'm with my friend. She's going to come too. I really wouldn't think nothing of it. Like we literally just all we've has exchanged messages. We have never met. Like, if your friend want to come, come. Cool. I don't even know if you even interested in me. Like I wouldn't think.

[Damaris]

No, just do something light. Go to coffee shop.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Like, you know what I mean? Just sit there, have some coffee, tea, whatever. Bust it up a little bit.

[Mall]

The dinner and club date ready yeah.

[Damaris]

He was ready to go in.

[Mall]

Why he full of. Is he like, y. What? Trying to smash.

[Baby D]

Why you even thinking that?

[Damaris]

Like, you know, I wasn't trying to smash, you know. No, you trying to smash. That Bahamian accent ain't fooling me. You was trying to. I knew exactly what you was to trying to do.

[Baby D]

Yeah, I. I don't know. I bring Alex on my. On my. Either first or second dates. So I can't. I can't speak on that.

[Damaris]

I bring her, you don't bring Alex on.

[Baby D]

I promise you. I came in here before, after a date and told y', all I just brought Alex on a date. Like, me and Alex.

[Damaris]

All your first dates?

[Baby D]

Not all of them, but a few of them.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but what's the difference between going on some of them and all of them? Like, what is. Is it something about availability? Oh, okay.

[Baby D]

Like, Alex will be with me for V day if, like, she ain't like, have her own man. Like, I would have just put her.

[Damaris]

No, but I mean, like, if you're going on a date with a guy, like, what makes you feel like, nah, let me bring Alex on this one. Ver versus like, nah.

[Baby D]

Because if. Okay, so a first date, no. Right. But the second day, you gotta. You gotta see if you mixing with the family. If you. If you can't. You know what I'm saying? If you want to be my date mixing with the family, you gotta get with my friends. That's what the Spice Girl.

[Mall]

At this point in my life, I'm not mad at a friend coming on the second date. Yeah, you listen, man. Birds of a feather, I've been burnt that way before. Nah, let me see your friend group, because that's really who you are. You trying to trick. You trying to trick me on this first date. And now I'm looking at somebody, a representation of you that's not you. Then I meet all your friends, and I'm like, I should have known.

[Damaris]

N. I don't mind you bringing a friend to meet up with me. If we, like, first time, hooking up, linking up type of thing. I ain't mad at that second date. Come on, shorty. Like, we. Because in a minute I'm like, all right, so what's she gonna do when we get intimate? She gonna be in the bedroom too, cuz she trying to.

[Mall]

But you've. You've never been like. I wouldn't even call it a date, but been out with a girl, you're talking to her friend. Friend, or friends come and then they leave and go. Do their own. And then you two go and leave.

[Damaris]

Like, yeah, I've definitely done that. But I'm saying the second date, like, date. Not like, yo, I'm going here tonight. Like, yo, like, you should pull up. Because then it's like. It's like, yeah, if you got your girls with you, yeah, y' all come out. But it date is like, me and you like, to be.

[Baby D]

To be fair, it is from the very jump. It's like, he, like, the last one I went on, he planned the date, like, for, like, I'm taking you in. I want to meet Alex. Me. You and Alex are going here? This is the first second date. Me. Me. Him and Alex went to a steakhouse, and then we went to the strip club after.

[Damaris]

Ooh, I like his style. I like his game. I know what he was trying to do. No, he was just trying to see. He was just trying to see. He was filling it out. He was reading. Reading the play. You got to read the defense.

[Mall]

If they sitting back, there's nothing wrong with doing that. That doesn't make you sleazy. Or he was trying to do something. Or he was trying to set something up. Sometimes you just have to check the temperature. Sometimes you don't even know.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Sometimes you're getting plotted on. You have no idea.

[Damaris]

Take them to the strip club.

[Sponsor Announcer 2]

Club.

[Damaris]

Beautiful women around. Cool. Let me see how they interact with women. Cool. She didn't lap dance. She's smacking some ass. Okay. She might be into women a little bit. Okay. You just learn. You gauging things about the girl. Like, okay, you watching it. Like, all right. She comfortable with women. She likes beautiful women. Just, like, we got some things in common. That's all. Not saying I'm trying to take you and your friend and go do something nasty, but, you know, the opportunity might present itself as long.

[Baby D]

Not over here.

[Damaris]

Not over here. But it may in other cases. That's right.

[Mall]

And if she got. Got, like, cool homegirls, that's always a fun day to begin with.

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Like, I prefer that type.

[Baby D]

But I also think you got to know who your home girl. A lot of people think that their homegirls are fun and they. Homegirls ain't fun.

[Mall]

Like, yeah, they're. They're fucking misery.

[Baby D]

I have the best homegirls in the world. Like, I know I can.

[Mall]

You have a good group.

[Baby D]

Yeah.

[Mall]

It's always fun.

[Baby D]

Yeah. So it's fun. But he. Yeah, he. He probably fumbled. He probably fumbled. If you feel like she's the type of girl who would Just want a free meal. Why you even try to date her?

[Mall]

Well, first of all, I think we were joking with the Fumble. I don't think. Unless he's really the man in the Bahamas. I don't think the. The Tracy was just coming in without nobody even meeting him. Just off Facebook. It was too, like, nah, we gonna. We both gonna fuck him.

[Baby D]

It happens, though. It happens. It's bitches like that.

[Mall]

I'm not saying there isn't.

[Damaris]

I'm just. My favorites. Put them in a special group on Facebook.

[Baby D]

Yeah, them.

[Damaris]

The girls you could put in a group chat together. They cool. They know what this is.

[Mall]

Y' all have killed me for doing that type of shit before.

[Damaris]

You put all your girls in a group chat before?

[Caller]

No.

[Mall]

Oh, but I. I put women that I've had group sex with and group chats the next day, and y' all called me sick and crazy for that.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but you was doing that. You just trying to talk about the Kennedy, like, conspiracy. That's all. You wasn't trying to have sex. You was like, yo, so do you really think that the CIA didn't kill Kennedy?

[Mall]

To me, that's like a very gallant move, that. After you do that, then we're all in a group chat talking about things we have in common. All right.

[Damaris]

I'm not mad at that.

[Baby D]

He left another one. I don't know. I don't.

[Mall]

Is it a follow up?

[Baby D]

Yeah, I don't know if he has a follow up.

[Mall]

We can cut it out if. If. If it's. If it's weird.

[Baby D]

Okay, let's see.

[Caller]

I feel like today being Valentine's Day, it's the perfect dated for me to tell y', all, but I don't trust bisexual women, but bisexuals in general.

[Mall]

I had an ex.

[Caller]

We were together for about two years. And, you know, it's great. She was bisexual when I met her. It was no secret, but I always had, like, this underlining thought. Like, you know, she's not fully 100 attracted to me. It's like a right now type of situation, baby. D, I'm not sure if you fully identify as a bisexual lesbian. Whatever.

[Mall]

She's gay.

[Caller]

I know you mess well. You say you messed with. How does that go? Is it like a switch? Because I feel like, you know, when we out, she's more attracted to women some days and Sundays then, you know, she showed me a little more than connection. But I always had this thought, like, I don't really think she. Well, I mean, you know, mind you, granted, we were genuinely in love and all that, but it's just like a me thing. Like I just couldn't put the. Put that footy behind my mind. Like, I don't know if it's like the switch or anything. I don't want to, you know, because I don't want to lose my S.O. a. That'd be crazy. Yeah, that's it. I just want to know how y' all feel about that. That y.

[Mall]

That this is y' all wheelhouse. Cuz you guys have issues with bisexual women. Not me.

[Damaris]

I have an issue with bisexual women.

[Baby D]

I. His reason. He has sound reasoning because that's the reason why I don't date bisexual men. And they were calling me like, they were calling me homophobic. And I'm like, I'm not a homophobic gay. I just, I. I would always think that. I would always wonder if you were more attracted to men than me. And that will bother me. That's why I don't date bisexual men.

[Mall]

Okay. I mean. All right, with, with that said, with that reasoning, if you're dating somebody that's straight, they would still lust for the other sex. So what's the difference there? They're either lust for other people or they don't. They either just want to be with you or not. I don't think bisexual or your. I don't see how that correlates at all.

[Baby D]

But he didn't say.

[Mall]

Just because they have the whole population of lust for doesn't mean. Mean that they wouldn't be faithful.

[Baby D]

But it hasn't. I don't even think it has anything. Well, he did mention faithful, but he said attracted. Like are you really, really attracted to me or are like. You can want to be with somebody but be attracted to somebody else more? That happens in relationships all the time.

[Mall]

Now you. We've had the con. I have no issue dating a bisexual woman. Now would I probably prefer the bisexual woman that dates men and just women? Probably, probably. But it also wouldn't matter that much because you cheat on me no matter what your sexual preference was. If you wanted to cheat.

[Baby D]

If you're a cheater. Yeah.

[Mall]

Like that. That doesn't. You would lust for whoever at that point.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mall]

So I don't even get that potential treating pool doubles. It does double. And women.

[Damaris]

It does.

[Mall]

Are way more convincing than men could ever be when it comes to a woman that's attracted to women.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

So I, I get it. But that's confidence you just need to have in your relationship. You haven't even met this girl yet.

[Baby D]

Well, he said no, this is somebody different. He's on his ex. This is. He split it up. But. So the question that he asked me was, is there a switch that turns on, right, or a switch that goes off? What I will say with me is, there is no switch. But I am more attracted physically to women than I am to men. The difference is the things that attract me to men are not physical things. So, like, I'm all about a man's attitude, the way he carries himself, his demeanor. Like, that's what attracts me to men. But women is purely physical, so it can be different. She can find different things attractive in women. Like, I think women are just naturally better people. And I Like, that's more attractive to me. Men.

[Damaris]

It's just like, women are naturally better people than men. That is a crazy statement.

[Baby D]

I do.

[Mall]

I do think that we've never started a war.

[Damaris]

Women are just naturally better people than men.

[Baby D]

Not all. Not all women. Not all men, but naturally. You know what I mean?

[Mall]

I'll be honest. I have gotten along better with bisexual women that have actually dated women. Not just fucked women and threesomes or just fucked a woman, like, dated a woman. It's something that I can relate to with them because they know how crazy women are, and they do appreciate men, I think, a bit more. She tried to hit me with the. I was.

[Damaris]

Her taking in what you were saying.

[Baby D]

Yeah, I was listening. Comprehend him.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Baby D]

Digest him.

[Mall]

She's trying to call me stupid. No, but for real, I've had those conversations. Women that have actually dated women and are like, no, I see what y' all go through. That's why I'm not dating women anymore. And that's why I'm fully on men. Like, so there's. There's pros and cons. Yeah, but, yeah, just find a straight chick that likes to eat.

[Baby D]

She could be. She could be 100. If you like to eat pussy, you're not straight. She can be 100, but she can want to be with you. But just, she could find women more attractive than you. Women are beautiful. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, you can't. The same reasons you attracted to women is the same reason she attracted to women. But men have, like, money and, like, biceps and, like, strength.

[Damaris]

Like that. Money, biceps and strength. Yeah.

[Baby D]

Like, you know, they can, like, fix things and like, they're like, you know, problem solvers. Like, when I date women, I don't want women to do anything. Like, I just want. I want you to just be beautiful. I don't want you to do anything mentioned men. It's like, what are you here for?

[Damaris]

Right. No, I get it.

[Baby D]

Be.

[Damaris]

I say the same thing to the homies. What y' all here for? Some. Some women around here. We need some women.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Need some soft legs in here. Yeah.

[Mall]

And you wonder why men kill themselves at a way higher rate than any other gender. Cuz sh.

[Baby D]

Y' all are hard on each other. Y' all are really hard on each.

[Mall]

We're hard on each other.

[Damaris]

What did you just say? It's us.

[Mall]

Can we reverse. Just reverse the tape in the edit and then go through what she just said.

[Baby D]

I do know that I tell y' all all the time the patriarchy was set up by men. We just adhere to it. Y' all can't be mad that y' all to it.

[Mall]

You just set on a public platform.

[Sponsor Announcer 2]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Because that's what I'm up and be useful.

[Baby D]

Yeah. That y' all are to y. Remember, y' all don't have emotions. Y' all are all logic. There's no emotions. It's all logic and we're providers.

[Mall]

There's logic and emotions.

[Baby D]

Who.

[Mall]

Who said otherwise? Twitter said otherwise. No, there's logic and emotion.

[Damaris]

Absolutely.

[Mall]

You can have logical emotions.

[Baby D]

No, you. You.

[Damaris]

You can. You can.

[Baby D]

You cannot have logical emotions. Logic and emotions are two completely different things.

[Damaris]

You can.

[Baby D]

You can.

[Mall]

You can have emotion. That's illogical. And it's okay because you're emotional. I'm not saying it's okay to be illogical sometimes because emotions are part of being human. But to say that there's not logical emotions is crazy.

[Damaris]

There's logical emotions.

[Baby D]

You can have logical actions. You feel emotions. Yeah. You can't feel logical. That's not. It doesn't work like that. So you can be. You can have emotions and still act logically or. Or still think logically, but emotions are completely separate. You can't have logical emotions. That doesn't even make sense.

[Damaris]

Let me ask Chad.

[Baby D]

That's like having emotions that make sense. Like it doesn't. No.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

You think the more you learn about your own emotions and certain things happen to you, whereas you may have had erratic emotions and still did logical actions.

[Damaris]

Logical emotions describe the interplay where logic helps process and regulate feelings, while emotions provide essential value and context for logical thought, creating a necessary balance for effective decision making and a holistic understanding. Men of human intelligence, rather than seeing them as opposing forces, they can be.

[Baby D]

Like you can together with.

[Mall]

With experience. You can teach your emotions to be more logical. As if you were to get mad at Somebody that you were talking to that weren't really dating and they went and did some. The immature emotions can take over and say, yo, what the. I feel for that girl. So now I'm mad. I didn't act on it, but I'm still mad because I'm human. But the more you teach your own emotions and become mature, you could see that and go, sama, girl.

[Damaris]

Very true.

[Mall]

I can feel like saw my girl.

[Damaris]

Well, for this Valentine's Day, hopefully everyone is having a great time and using their logical emotions. Health in a healthy way.

[Mall]

Yes.

[Damaris]

Not in a toxic way. And to keep having these healthy conversations and keep making wise decisions for Valentine's Day, be with the one you love. Love the one you you're with. And continue to, you know, have fun in your relationship and be creative.

[Baby D]

Okay, we have one more. And from this. This sounds like it might be a Riz. Another Riz poem. So let's see.

[Damaris]

Oh, shit.

[Mall]

You getting them all.

[Damaris]

All right. I just want to dedicate this one to a special somebody in that room. You know, he knows who he is. My heart started racing the day I met Mall. Didn't plan out forever, but look at us now. Mall, you smiled one time. And that was my downfall. Now loving you feel natural, Mole. They say love can rise and sometimes. Stop playing with me, dog.

[Baby D]

Let him finish. Let him finish. Yo.

[Damaris]

Oh, the wintertime chills or springtime rainfall. I'll stand 10 toes down for you, Maul. No need for a kingdom, no castle, no ball. You already me make me feel 10ft tall. If life throws a curve and we stumble or stall. I'm over it all.

[Mall]

Mall.

[Baby D]

Oh, Maul.

[Damaris]

Here's the laughs and the late night calls. The way you turn simple moments into all this. Valentine's Day, I'm giving you my all. Because loving you is the sweetest call moment.

[Mall]

You didn't even understand the mall call.

[Damaris]

Eden is so gay.

[Mall]

Can you tell us about the late night calls? He does leave you sticky notes on.

[Damaris]

Your channel every time he comes in here, Ed. And always leave me sticky notes like, yo, Eden, I'm not gay, bro. Leave me alone, man. But thank you, Eddie, for that beautiful poem.

[Baby D]

Wait, let me. I wonder if I call him if.

[Mall]

He'Ll answer the phone before we get out of here. What are we doing with Spread him. Let's. Let's have real pre production in real time stuff. Thursday we have to wrap up. Spread them. Sponsored by Hard Rock. Bet.

[Damaris]

Yep.

[Mall]

Our guys over at Hard Rock spread them all. I. I cleaned you up like 15 to 2 you did in. In our. Our spread.

[Damaris]

Listen, man, the Patriots. Whatever, man.

[Mall]

But as. I mean, as a friend, for this live stream that we have to do.

[Damaris]

I had to name a thousand rappers.

[Mall]

I'll take 500.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mall]

No, and I'm saying I'll take 500. You take 500.

[Damaris]

Oh, split them. So we're gonna split the spread them.

[Mall]

Can m. Maybe we do again this pre production real time. Do we do a split live stream and Whoever gets a 500 first, even with repeats. But maybe we can't hear each other.

[Damaris]

Like maybe put the clock sound like it'd be crazy.

[Baby D]

Yes, too over stimulating for the audience.

[Mall]

No, not at. Like, we'll shoot mall live stream one day. Me live stream the other with the clock and see who gets it. Okay, get that first. Maybe. Maybe the listeners can give us suggestions. But. Okay, we'll figure something out with this.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

This spread them.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Segment for sure.

[Baby D]

Do y' all know how many rappers a thousand is?

[Damaris]

There's a lot of rappers.

[Mall]

I think I could do it.

[Damaris]

I think you underestimate how many rappers there are, though.

[Mall]

I think I could do it either.

[Baby D]

I really think y' all should just.

[Mall]

I was hoping to lose a hundred.

[Damaris]

A hundred is way too easy. I could do that in five minutes.

[Baby D]

I bet a million dollars. I would bet all the. You know what? I bet my next month salary that you cannot. That you cannot name a hundred rappers in 20 minutes. I bet my month's salary that you cannot. That you cannot.

[Mall]

Damaris, I love you way too much.

[Damaris]

I'm six years younger than hip hop. Like, what are you talking about?

[Mall]

I love you way too much to accept that bet.

[Damaris]

What? You're crazy if you think. You don't think. You don't think I can name 100 rappers in 20 minutes. In 20 minutes.

[Mall]

In 20 minutes.

[Damaris]

I might be able to. I might be able to name 100 rappers in 10 minutes.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Damaris]

But less than that, probably.

[Baby D]

Let's do that spread. Can I make my own if I.

[Damaris]

Name the entire Wu Tang? I'm already at 12, so I got 88 more to go. You think it's going to take me a minute to name all the members of Wuang?

[Mall]

Okay, you could name.

[Damaris]

I can name everybody.

[Mall]

Get out of the five birds.

[Damaris]

I can name everybody in Wuang. I can name everybody.

[Mall]

Death Row, Bad Boy Rockefeller.

[Damaris]

I'm at like 20 minutes.

[Mall]

I'm at like 35 at that point.

[Damaris]

Yeah, that's easy. That's way too 100 is easy.

[Baby D]

I think once y' all get to 60 is where you going to have an issue? I think 60. 70 is 60 came.

[Damaris]

60 albums came out. This like, we only in February. I could definitely name 60 rappers.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Hell, yeah. That's way too easy.

[Mall]

Oh, yeah. I was thinking a thousand. Like 100.

[Baby D]

No computer in front of you.

[Damaris]

Just.

[Mall]

No, of course. No, no. We were saying. No. Yeah. No. No computer.

[Baby D]

Because I want exact names. I don't want that one from Bad boy. I name it.

[Damaris]

I can give you names.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Damaris]

Because all I'm gonna do is go by City. That's it.

[Mall]

He could probably name every member of the band. Yeah, that's another 12.

[Damaris]

Like, every season. Every season.

[Mall]

Peach can name everyone in St. Lunatics. That's another 12. Now we're at 70.

[Baby D]

So what's the definition of a rapper? Because if a got one song, if that's the case, y' all can name me. Like, that's not.

[Mall]

If I was doing a thousand, you would have been named.

[Damaris]

Yeah. You have to have like a. You have to have a song or an album.

[Mall]

You have to have an album on dsp.

[Damaris]

You can't. An album?

[Baby D]

An album.

[Mall]

No, that's crazy.

[Damaris]

You gotta at least be on a song featured on the. A song that was out, not an album.

[Baby D]

All right. I gotta be able to look you up in Apple Music.

[Mall]

I'm fine with that.

[Damaris]

Oh, yeah. The song will be on Apple Music. Yeah. Okay. Absolutely. We could do that. Yeah.

[Baby D]

And they can't be a singer.

[Mall]

I got homies from high school that are on Apple Music.

[Baby D]

You can't. You can't be a singer that made a rap song. Like. You can't name Jill Scott just because she was on the Conway song.

[Mall]

She didn't rap on the Conway.

[Damaris]

So you think I would name Jill Scott as one of my hundred rappers?

[Baby D]

Huh?

[Damaris]

You think I would?

[Baby D]

No, I don't think so. But I'm just saying. Just that. You know what I'm saying?

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

I could do it, though.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Damaris]

500 is tough. 100 is way too easy.

[Mall]

Peach had the best strategy. If you just think regions and focus on that.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Per five minutes.

[Damaris]

If I name every rapper in New York, you know where I'm at?

[Mall]

Just Long island. You got 15.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Baby D]

Okay.

[Damaris]

It's not as tough. It's not. It's more rappers than you think. That's what I'm thinking. Underestimating is how many rappers.

[Baby D]

I know that there's a lot of rappers. It's the thinking in the moment and the pressure. Pressure of all of those rappers.

[Damaris]

No. Pressure where Pressure.

[Baby D]

Who oh my bad baby.

[Damaris]

Pressure me or pressure you? We'll talk to y' all soon. Be safe. Be blessed. I'm that he's just ginger. Peace.

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[Mall]

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[Damaris]

Fraud paying American is something no American.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Should have to claim.

[Mall]

Save up to 40% your first year. Visit lifelock.com iheart Terms apply a better Help ad We get it. February is full of flowers, candy and.

[Baby D]

Of course lots of talk about relations.

[Mall]

It can feel like everyone else has it all together in their love lives, but the truth is, we're all still figuring it out. Whether you're working on your marriage, navigating the dating apps, or prioritizing staying single no matter where you are, you're right on time. Therapy can help you find your way and take some of the pressure off yourself so you can determine what you want, what feels heavy, and how you can feel light, lighter. Just a little bit of outside perspective from a professional can lead to new understanding and a lot of progress. So the next time you're feeling iffy about your love life, try therapy with BetterHelp and see where it takes you. And remember, you're right on time. Visit betterhelp.com for 10% off. That's betterhelp.com ready to feel healthy this year?

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[Damaris]

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[Damaris]

Co.

[Baby D]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.