Episode 495 | Ran to Toronto

Summary

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New Rory & MAL – Episode 495 | "Ran to Toronto"

Date: May 19, 2026
Podcast Hosts: Rory, Mal, Damaris
Episode Theme: Toronto adventures, Drake’s “Iceman” album drop, NYC summer energy, and some candid hip-hop industry analysis and laughs.

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EPISODE OVERVIEW

The crew reunites after Mal’s trip to Toronto for a weekend packed with OVO family gatherings and celebrations around Drake’s new three-album release, “Iceman,” “Maid of Honor,” and “Habibti.” The episode centers on their reactions to the albums, the shifting music industry, the art of the rollout, and wild post-release parties. Of course, the convo meanders into relationship talk, therapist “doctoring,” classic talk shows, and debates about music, money, and authenticity.

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KEY DISCUSSION POINTS & INSIGHTS

Mal’s Toronto Recap and OVO Family Energy

• Mal shares stories from his trip to Toronto, OVO’s “Iceman” release celebrations, and reconnecting with friends.
  • (03:36) “I'm Paul Ripken. I'm the iron man of this podcast and shit, man.” – Mal
• Fireworks, lavish afterparties at Hotel X, and Drake's signature style set the backdrop for a weekend immersed in Toronto's creative scene.

The NYC Crew’s Weekend: Hookah, Baddies & Drake Album Release

• Rory & Damaris recount a Friday night of streaming the Drake album; Damaris jokes about "throwing ass" as they test “Maid of Honor” at a hookah lounge.
  • (06:48) "I want to let y’all know that my ass is gonna fall off...gonna detach from my hips..." – Damaris
• Zip (their friend) is fresh home after a long stint and enjoys the hookah scene and celebratory mood.

Black's Album Listening (6lack) & New Music Drops

• Rory attends 6lack’s Bowery event where 6lack performed the whole album live – a unique way to debut a record.
  • (11:09) "He performed the entire album. Fire...the way we heard the album for the first time was a live performance." – Rory

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DEEP DIVE: DRAKE’S “ICEMAN” TRILOGY

Album Review – The Crew’s First Takes & Standout Tracks

• Best Produced Since “Views”?

  • (13:54) "To me, this is the best music that I've heard since Views..." – Rory
  • Not about lyrical content, but pure musicality and production.

• Drake’s Lyricism & Evolution

  • (14:26) “Some of the best rapping he's ever done...up there for sure...solidifies Drake as the best intro rap artist.” – Rory
  • (17:57) "Make them pay. Make them cry. I think that's some of the best rapping Drake has ever done.” – Mal

• Favorites & Replay Value

  • Damaris: Can’t pick favorites yet, but “Maid of Honor” has been played the most (“Make Them Cry”, “Too Hard for the Radio,” "Hoface," "True Bestie.")
  • Rory: Favors "Classic" off ... still needs to hear Maid of Honor outside/with women.
  • Mal: “Janice,” “Shebang,” “Make Them Pay,” “Make Them Cry.”
  • (18:13) “The Aiden Ross...that bar is one of the slickest bars in rap history...the universe wrote that bar.” – Mal

• Three-Album Format Sets a New Bar

  • Drake’s ability to divide the project into rap, R&B, and experimental/international vibes impresses all.
  • Damaris: “It kind of takes a weight off your shoulder. Like I can say whatever the fuck I want to say because I have something for them. This is for the rap fans.” (41:34)

Album Rollout & Industry Impact

• Changing the Game for Big Artist Rollouts
  • (24:13) “You have to be more creative in your rollout...the days of just saying 'Hey, my release date is ____'...that's going to feel a little bland now at this point.” – Mal
  • Rory notes rollouts must be authentic to the artist (shouts out J. Cole's “The Fall Off” rollout for being true to him).
• Drake’s Influence & Consistency
  • Mal: “If you're a Drake fan, if you've ever been a fan of Drake, I don't Know how this is not already one of your favorite Drake albums ever...from top to bottom.” (22:16)
  • On serving different fan bases by splitting albums by style.

Discussion on Drake’s Industry Power & $5 Billion Deal Rumors

• Speculation on Label Bidding War, Independence, & Private Equity

  • Rory asks if Drake would get $5B from UMG or take a private equity route now that he's allegedly done with his previous label.
  • Mal: “If they'll give you 3 billion, they'll give you 5 billion...at that level, there's no difference. It's just called dragging your nuts.” (59:03)
  • Damaris and Rory bring up the scale of such offers and the precedent it could set.

• What Happens Next to Major Labels If Drake Goes Independent?

  • (62:27) "It would be the first time an artist of that level would not be under a major. And I'm very curious what that would do to the music industry." – Rory
  • Mal: “A lot of things changed Thursday night. I think...all the artists...were inspired in some form of fashion.” (63:55)

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MEMORABLE QUOTES & MOMENTS

• (06:48, Damaris): "I want to let y’all know that my ass is gonna fall off...gonna detach from my hips..."
• (13:54, Rory): "This is the best produced Drake album since Views, music wise."
• (17:54, Mal): "Janice today...and Shebang obviously. Make them pay, make them cry..."
• (18:13, Mal): "That bar, the Aiden Ross… the universe wrote that bar."
• (22:16, Mal): "If you're a Drake fan...I don't know how this is not already one of your favorite Drake albums ever."
• (41:34, Damaris): "It kind of takes a weight off your shoulder..."
• (59:03, Mal): "At that level, there's no difference [between 3 and 5 billion]. It's just called dragging your nuts."

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CULTURE, SOCIAL, & LOL SEGMENTS

Therapist “Doctor” Scandal

• Discussion about Dr. Cheyenne Bryant being exposed for not being able to show her doctorate; the conversation covers credential inflation and online personalities faking expertise.
  • (71:51, Rory): “[She said] ‘I only answer to God. I don't. I don't need to answer to humans about my degree.’ …I feel like you owe God and us your degree.”
  • Damaris: “Putting the doctor before your name...gives people a sense of credibility.”

Talk Shows & Old TV Nostalgia

• Throwback convo about Ricky Lake, Scared Straight, and who they'd have been on classic shows. Jason Lee’s old reality TV appearance comes up with wild, now-viral stories.
  • (91:13, Damaris): "Jason Lee was fine. That was one. He was real fine. That's a straight man. That was first thing..."

Makeup “Catfish” Debate

• Mal complains about makeup contouring being modern-day catfishing and jokes about wanting to sue for damages.
  • (99:59, Mal): "I've been a victim. I've been a victim!"

Music Biz and Hip-Hop Scene Comments

• 6lack, Gunna, Don Toliver, Nick Grant, Giveon, and their recent projects get quick shoutouts.
• Basketball talk: Knicks’ playoff hopes, what a summer in NYC could look like if the city wins and FIFA is in town.

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TIMESTAMPS FOR IMPORTANT SEGMENTS

• Mal returns and Toronto trip stories: (03:14 – 05:23)
• NYC crew Friday night / Hookah / Drake stream: (06:06 – 09:45)
• First reactions to “Iceman” & the trilogy: (13:54 – 22:51)
• The Aiden Ross bar & lyrical highlights: (17:54 – 19:15)
• Rollout, impact, and music industry talk: (24:13 – 27:01, 59:03 – 65:21)
• Speculation on Drake’s label future & money: (56:44 – 65:21)
• Ricky Lake, Jason Lee nostalgia: (90:09 – 91:54)
• Therapist/Doctor degree scandal commentary: (70:16 – 81:39)
• Makeup “catfish” debates: (99:43 – 102:26)
• Basketball / Knicks playoff conversation: (104:22 – 106:34)

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FINAL THOUGHTS

The episode is a full-circle celebration of Drake's latest work, a critical look at how major artists can shift the culture both through their music and their business decisions, and a reminder that the best podcast moments are both random and real. Whether they're breaking down triple album rollouts, recounting wild Toronto parties, or debating the Authenticity of “doctors” in the Instagram age, New Rory & MAL keep it complicated, hilarious, and always entertaining.

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“Salute to Drake for doing everything he said he would and, you know, creating something, a moment that I don’t think we’ll forget. And music that I think will age gracefully as well. I think the music is only...These three albums are only going to sound better as time goes on."

• Mal (52:49)

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For more behind-the-scenes, jokes, and live streams (including Damaris “twerking to Iceman”), check out their Patreon.

Transcript

[Damaris]

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[Mal]

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[Rory]

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[Mal]

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[Rory]

Welcome back. Top of the week. A beautiful, beautiful day in New York City. It is very hot. The weather has officially turned. I mean, we may go back to 30 degrees by the end of the week.

[Damaris]

Who knows?

[Rory]

But we are back. It is a lovely, lovely Monday. We have our brother in Arms Mall back from the North International Mall. We missed you so much.

[Damaris]

Missed you so much. You never take. You've never taken an episode off. So, yeah, we missed you. Or one, I think when you were sick.

[Rory]

A well deserved break.

[Mal]

I'm like the Cal Ripken of podcast.

[Rory]

You are definitely the Cal Ripken of podcast.

[Mal]

I don't even know that about me, Roy. I'm the Cal Ripken of this shit right here.

[Rory]

Cal Ripken iii. Yeah, you're definitely Cal Ripke. You're definitely Maul Ripken.

[Mal]

I'm Paul Ripken. I'm the iron man of this podcast and shit, man. Yeah.

[Rory]

Well, we are happy to have you back. Your presence was definitely missed, but it was definitely for, for, for good measure that you were gone at the end of the week. How was your. How was your trip to the native land of Toronto?

[Mal]

Well, first of all, I do want to start by saying shout out to D Dot. I was mad I couldn't.

[Rory]

Yeah, it was a great episode.

[Mal]

I'm mad I wasn't here to kick it with D dot. That's one of, you know, the OGs and one of the people that like, enjoy seeing and talking to. So Matt. I missed him, but, you know, shout out to D. Dot. Shout out to Trey Lee.

[Rory]

Tracy Lee.

[Mal]

Yeah, coming through as well. And we are sponsored by Boost Mobile, unlimited talk, text and data.

[Rory]

Nah, you sponsored by Rogers today?

[Mal]

Well, no, I'm back. I'm back in America now.

[Rory]

You got your Boost service back?

[Mal]

Yeah, I'm back in America. They gave me my Boost Mobile back, man. Yeah.

[Rory]

So you touched down, what, this morning? Yesterday.

[Mal]

Yeah, yesterday.

[Rory]

So full, full weekend in Toronto. What. What did you do while you were up there? Was it just coincidence?

[Mal]

Coincidence that you were up in Toronto? What do you mean was it?

[Damaris]

He's doing the thing. He's doing the thing.

[Rory]

I'm just asking about his trip, you know.

[Mal]

Oh. Oh, he's making a joke.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah, my bad, Rory.

[Mal]

Ah, he is.

[Rory]

Thanks, man.

[Mal]

No, well, well, Iceman came out last, what, Last Thursday. So I went up to support my guy, to see you, see the crew, man. I haven't seen my guys in a minute, so it was good to see. See my guy. Shout out my guy, Nico. I see my boy Nico in a minute, man. So it was good seeing him shout out to the whole OVO family, man. It was, it was a great time. Great weekend.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

Major weekend for them. So just went up to support, man.

[Rory]

So Thursday night looked like there was a fireworks show. Looked like you guys were like in some type of hotel overlooking the water. Like. What. What was the Thursday night event?

[Mal]

Oh, we was at our. Our spot, Hotel X. It was at the rooftop.

[Rory]

Oh, great. Oh, yeah, I love that place. Yeah.

[Mal]

So we was at the rooftop of Hotel X and. Yeah, just watch. Just to watch the stream and, you know, have some drinks and laughs and kick it. Talk shit, man. It was a good time, man. That was it. Okay.

[Rory]

No, I just.

[Mal]

What are you digging for? Like, what are you talking.

[Rory]

I'm just asking what happened, that's all.

[Mal]

No, that was it. Literally. Watch the stream like everybody else. Okay.

[Rory]

That's all.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

What about the rest of the weekend? It was also a nice weekend in Toronto, weather wise.

[Mal]

Yeah, I just. I chilled though. I saw some of my family, some of my friends up there and shit. That was it, though. It was. It wasn't nothing like too, you know, I wasn't like outside in the clubs running around. I wasn't doing none of that. No, I wasn't that.

[Rory]

Gotcha. Okay, well, yeah, me and Damaris did a stream. That was Friday, right? Was it?

[Damaris]

It was Friday, my day off.

[Rory]

We had. We had to do a little. Little Iceman stream.

[Damaris]

Yeah, we did.

[Mal]

What was it? Well, I called him.

[Rory]

Yeah, you called him For a little bit. It was fun. It was a good time. And, you know, I didn't want to do Thursday night because I wanted to actually listen to the album at least once before we start reviewing stuff, but it was cool. Then we went out afterwards, you know, gave it a card test that I think Damaris seemed to pass.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Oh, no, they played it. We went to the one Hookah lounge. We knew we'd be playing it. Yeah, I just. I want to let y' all know that my ass is gonna fall off. From True Bestie. My ass is gonna fall off. Just wanna let y' all know I'm gonna throw so much ass that my ass is gonna detach from my hips and wherever it was, it's just gonna be on the ground there. I'm gonna throw my ass to that. Just thought I'd let you know.

[Mal]

It was so interesting because I saw the clip, but I had it on mute. Yeah, I thought y' all was playing. Well, we survived the let out. Maris was standing outside.

[Damaris]

See, we not doing this. I just said I missed you.

[Rory]

We were celebrating.

[Mal]

It was on mute. The video was on mute.

[Damaris]

I just said I missed you.

[Mal]

And I couldn't tell. I was like, maybe they listening to Maybe like, they riding around the city going crazy with Cole.

[Damaris]

Don't piss me off.

[Mal]

And then I'm just saying. I just saw the clip. I saw the clip, and I was like, oh, shit. I said, what they doing riding around like, okay. I said, oh, Damaris hanging out the sunroof. She on her cold shit. She letting the streets know Cole is outside. And then I, like, tapped the unmute button.

[Rory]

That's what you think she was doing.

[Mal]

That's what I thought. I thought y' all was riding around on y' all cold. Cold was in a Honda. Y' all was in the whip. I was like, okay, baby D out the sunroof on a Friday night. I was like, okay, it's lit.

[Damaris]

I just said, I missed this N A. And he on his way to pissed me off already. Number one, I've done it. Nicole do it to Cole plenty of times. That's number one. Number two, let Drake enjoy his motherfucking moment.

[Mal]

He did it on the bicycle. City bike. She was standing on the seat on the city. Imagine you in the car. You see Damaris go by you on the seat, on the seat by standing

[Rory]

up like this, like. Like biker boys. So what? What if I was riding? She was on the. The handlebars. That's. Come on, let's do it.

[Mal]

Let's see if we can do it

[Damaris]

when we leave the studio today.

[Mal]

That would be hilarious, man. Oh, man. I was dying looking at that, though. I said, look at Damaris, man.

[Damaris]

Oh, we had. We had baddies with us.

[Rory]

Yeah, you can see the baddies.

[Damaris]

Hookah liquor. Yeah, you can't see the baddies. They sitting behind the seats, but baddies. Hookah liquor. New Drake album. We throwing ass. We had a ball.

[Rory]

We was kind of outside. Outside. Maybe back together.

[Damaris]

No, wait. Why? I had one of them moments, yo. You know, N start drinking, they get emotional. So it's me, Rory, my two friends, and Zip at the table hookah lounge. So I look at Zip, right? Mind you. Drake going off hookah flowing. Bitches bad. Bitches blowing smoke. We got liquor. I look at Zip. Zip just looking around. I say, yo, Zip, yo, I'm emotional, yo. I'm so happy you get to experience this. My did 18 years, yo. He home his around Drake playing hookah like he look. That nigga's upset. Yeah, man. Word feel good being home.

[Mal]

He been home for six years. Like, marriage, like, y' all picked him up from the gate just now. Like, he been home six years. Like the you talking about.

[Rory]

He did look like he was reflecting.

[Damaris]

He Was though. He was, he was like, I don't even want Drake no more. I'm just like vibing. I'm like, that's my boy Zip man. We showed him.

[Mal]

Shoot everybody in this. That's what he was.

[Damaris]

No, wait. Rory got up to go to the bathroom mall. Oh my God. This why you can't take institutionalized hood nowhere. Rory got up to go to the bathroom. So zip stand and then like, you know, people were coming in and out the hookah lounge. We sitting at the front door. You know how Sarah is. Zip stand up. When Rory goes to the bathroom and he's standing in front of the door like, like in front of our table like this. No lie. Zip standing just like this.

[Mal]

Did he have a phone book strapped to his stomach?

[Damaris]

I said, zip, sit down. Like we good. I promise you. Like, we good here. He like, you know, I don't know these. I was like, all right, man.

[Mal]

It's a hookah lounge. Like you ain't supposed to notice we're out in public.

[Rory]

This isn't a buyout.

[Mal]

We're in a public place. Like, yeah, I hope you know, don't know these. Yeah.

[Rory]

The only thing he didn't do was make his own wine.

[Mal]

Oh my God, man. Shout out to Zip man.

[Rory]

Yeah, love Zip. Do you anything else over the weekend?

[Damaris]

Nah. After that night we left. You went back to my house, changed shoes. We just spot hopped. I ended up in Riviera strip club with two light skinned. I don't know them two light skinned was in Rivieras.

[Rory]

Were they spending at least? Oh, okay.

[Damaris]

You thought I was there since. Anyway. Yeah, I just went home. I got home 5:35 that morning.

[Mal]

5:35. What a time.

[Damaris]

Jesus.

[Rory]

You were outside, outside?

[Damaris]

I was outside outside.

[Rory]

I went to Black had a listening event 6 lack for those that call him that at Bowery last night. I thought it was like a playback. Like he was just going to play the album for everybody. He performed the entire album Fire. Like I. I'd never seen an artist do that before. Like it was really a show and like he let the feature verses just play. But yeah, he, he put on a whole performance. The, the way we heard the album for the first time was a live performance, which I thought was the coolest ever.

[Mal]

That's dope.

[Rory]

And, and the album sounds incredible too. I'm not just saying that. I don't want to like make black fans think it's a rap album. But Black is rapping more than he's ever raped before.

[Mal]

He's rapping on this dope.

[Rory]

Yeah. So I'm excited. I'm excited for Friday. He said. He said he'd come on the pod as well. Yeah, that he wanted to.

[Mal]

Yeah. Is that like industry talk?

[Rory]

No, no, he brought it up. No, he said he already talked to his people. I didn't ask him.

[Mal]

Don't corner me. Don't corner me and press.

[Rory]

He invited me to the pod. Okay. All right.

[Mal]

All right, cool. Shout out to Black, man. I. With Black.

[Rory]

Yeah, no, he's a good guy. And the album sounds incredible. Out this Friday, I believe, right? Yeah.

[Mal]

And that's lvrn, right? Oh, that's family. Come on, man. Shout out Black. Shout out Justice. Shout out everybody lvrn.

[Rory]

Yeah. Hopefully he'll be on the show soon, but I. You guys are definitely gonna.

[Mal]

With the project. I like Black. I mean, he's always.

[Rory]

He's always.

[Mal]

He always puts out good music, great projects. He takes his time. He's not somebody that's always, you know, in the space, flooding us with music. He always takes a break, lives life, and then comes back and updates us through the music. So I fuck with Black. I'm looking forward to that.

[Rory]

All right, now that we got the weekend out of the way, you can go to our Patreon to see if Mal did in fact get an OVO chain. The answer is revealed there. We don't need to get into that. It may be under the shirt right now. We don't know. But let's get to the actual project. Let's start with Iceman. I think this is the best produced Drake album sends views music wise. Production wise. I think Iceman is the best. I did not. I didn't make. I was gonna say, why are we clapping? I didn't make the project. But no, to me, this. This is the best music that I've heard since Views. People can have their opinions on the lyrical content, what he's talking about, this and that. But the pure music of it, to me is. Is right there. It's. It's really, really good. I really. With Iceman, I think he checked all the boxes too. I think we got some of the. The version of mature Drake that we were looking for. Not the 444 Drake, but the. Hey, I'm battling being 40 Drake. I. I think that's in there. I think we got the outside songs. I. I think he checked the boxes we were looking for. And I don't. I really don't think he was complaining the way some people are making it out to see you. He's just Explaining what the happened.

[Mal]

People saying he was complaining.

[Rory]

Yeah. And whining.

[Damaris]

What I always said I drink wines.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Like he's not gonna whine now.

[Mal]

Whining. That's funny.

[Rory]

But make them cry.

[Damaris]

It's.

[Rory]

It's up there with Tuscan leather. I don't think that's a crazy.

[Mal]

I take that's one of the songs that I heard. He was like, all right, I'm gonna ask you if this was one of the songs, and if it is. Oh, if it's bad, I want to know if that's one of the songs you heard.

[Rory]

Oh, yeah. What was your take again, that you had told me this is some of

[Mal]

the best rapping he's ever done.

[Rory]

Oh, yeah. It's definitely up there for sure. And I think this kind of solidifies Drake is the best intro rap artist.

[Mal]

Oh, yeah.

[Rory]

I think that kind of goes without saying.

[Mal]

No, easily. Definitely.

[Rory]

Yeah. That. That was a stamp for me. But Damaris, we got to listen to this in real time. Well, I listened to it a few times.

[Damaris]

No, I had heard it for the first time on the stream.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

I was kind of surprised at your reaction to what.

[Damaris]

Why would you.

[Rory]

To how much you loved it.

[Damaris]

Why would you be surprised at how much I loved it?

[Mal]

I just.

[Damaris]

Has there ever been a Drake album that came out that I didn't love?

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

For all the Dogs. We can pull the clip up. Let's know.

[Damaris]

You can put a clip up. Me and Maul loved. For all the Dogs. You.

[Rory]

Oh, yeah. No, I don't.

[Damaris]

For all the Dogs. Me and Ma loved it.

[Rory]

Yeah. I don't like roller dogs, but with that said, yeah, I was shocked that you had the same align with me. Went fucking seven for seven for the first ones. What are some of your favorites on here?

[Damaris]

So, to be fair, it's. I don't even feel comfortable rating this album or really even picking out favorites yet, because it's a lot of fucking music, and I haven't given. I've heard Maid of Honor the most. So out of the three albums, I have played Maid of Honor the most. But that's just because I was outside this weekend. I was cleaning my house this weekend. Iceman is me putting in my headphones in, like, commuting or driving or that kind of thing. So I haven't had the chance to really fully listen to it. But so far, all of my favorites are on Made of Honor. Outside of the first two songs, I'm terrible with names like Maul. Make Them Remember, Make Them Cry, and Make them Cry. And Dust. Yeah, I love. And there's also the Mac Dre song on there that I really, really, really, really love.

[Rory]

Too Hard for the Radio.

[Damaris]

Yes, that one. And then the Ass Shaking songs from Maid of Honor. My favorite ones would be Hoface True Bestie. I don't remember the exact names of them. I love Classic Off Habiti. It's a lot of fucking music. So I'm still throughout time. I will be coming back to y' all like, ah, this one might be my favorite now, but yeah, I told y' all my ass gonna fall off.

[Rory]

Yeah, same page. I mean I listen to Iceman the most because again, the other two I need to hear outside or like around some women, but out the gate.

[Damaris]

Yes.

[Rory]

Classic is my. My favorite off that one for sure. And Made of Honor. I need to hear that like outside for real. I can't sit in my crib and just listen to that and fairly judge anything.

[Damaris]

But we were throwing ass to it on the stream and in. In Sahara.

[Rory]

Yeah, well, we were outside. But I'm saying like fully, I need to be at Burgers and Bottles to hear that. That type of. Yeah, but I would say obviously make them Cry. Janice, Shut the Up. Ran to Atlanta. National Treasure. Too hard for the radio. I think all those are going to play outside. I think Little Birdie would even play outside. I think he has the good mix of those type of records. And then the Make Them series, which is for people like me. Make them cry. What is it?

[Damaris]

Make them.

[Rory]

Make them remember. Make them know. Firm Friends is one of my favorite conductor beats in a while like that. I. I love the Firm Friends beat. Yeah.

[Damaris]

Pause. I'm thinking Friends though. Drake, that's Chris. A crazy name for a song.

[Rory]

Firm Friends.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

You got a nasty brain.

[Damaris]

I do.

[Rory]

That's. That's weird. That's where my one. I know you've had some of this album for quite some time, so you've lived with it more than we have. What. What are your favorites on Iceman?

[Mal]

Probably Janice today.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

And Shebang, obviously. Make them pay. Make them cry. I think that's some of the best rapping Drake has ever done. Drake has one of the craziest bars, I think in rap. One of the slickest bars in rap history. I make them pay for sure.

[Damaris]

Which bar would it be?

[Mal]

The Aiden Ross.

[Rory]

Yeah, we're talking about that on stream.

[Mal]

No, seriously, that's one of the slickest bars in rap history. You know, first of all, Drake didn't write that. The universe wrote that. You know what had to Happen for that bar to, like. Just think about that. You know what had to happen for that bar to happen?

[Damaris]

What had to happen?

[Mal]

Okay, so two people had to meet up and make love and have a kid named Aiden Ross.

[Rory]

You think he was made up?

[Mal]

And then that kid, Kid Aiden Ross had to grow up. That kid, Aiden Ross had to grow up and become a streamer. Right?

[Rory]

And then he had to get a steak deal and meet Drake.

[Mal]

It's a lot of things that had to happen for that bar to happen, which is why that bar is one of the slickest bars in. Listen, when Drake played that, imagine. Imagine hearing that song and then you can't tell nobody about that song.

[Rory]

Yeah, no, it's. It's crazy.

[Mal]

Like, when I heard that song and I heard that bar, I was just like, all right, man. Like, I. How am I supposed to, like, just keep this, like, under wrap? Like, I just heard some of the greatest raps from one of the greatest artists in the history of music, and I can't tell nobody about this shit.

[Rory]

But also, you forgot the other side of that. You told the Aiden Ross life story. I think some other medical help needs to happen as well to bring that bar together. Someone needs aid.

[Mal]

Someone. Well, yes. I mean, that's what I'm saying. The universe had to. Had to. The universe wrote that bar. It was the universe. It wasn't Drake. Drake didn't write that bar. It was the universe. But, yeah, to me, I'm. I'm again. I'm still living with the album. It's, again, a lot of music. I think these albums, all three of them, are gonna sound better as time goes on. As time passes, I think the music is gonna sound better, especially Maid of Honor and Habibti. I think those two albums are gonna sound better. The Iceman album, I think people already get it and understand. Yeah.

[Rory]

Straight to the point.

[Mal]

I think people feel that that music already. Maid of Honor, Habibti. By the time people look up and they kind of like, oh, shit. Like, you outside moving around and you start seeing, like, at the. At the after party, Shout Out Noelle and Mark Noel was playing. I think whole phase. And at first, because. Because it's like. You gotta shout out to Gordo, too.

[Rory]

Gordo's very talented.

[Mal]

Because at first you gotta kind of like catch the beat. And it's like the way it starts and then the way what it goes into is something totally different. But you can see the women, like, because. Because Noel played it. He brought it back a couple times. So you can see the women Catching it, like. And they kind of giving each other that look like, oh, this is gonna go crazy.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

And that's what I think a lot of people gonna do with those albums. Once you start moving around and, you know, outside and get to live with the music a little bit, I think those songs are gonna start to land and hit you, you know, once again, you just kind of get the Iceman. I think everybody. Unanimously. Again. There's people that hate it, but that's part of it, you know? I mean, that's even. That. Even people that, hey, you know what I'm start doing what I think we gotta start. Because again, all of this is preference and taste, right? When people be like, I don't like this. I don't like that. And sometimes we don't understand it. Cause some of us are just unanimously sometimes, like, this is incredible. I want to start asking people when it's like, undeniable great dope shit in front of them. And they'd be like, nah, I don't like that. We got to dig deep and ask other questions. Like, yo, what's your favorite restaurant?

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

Like, what's your house smell like? Oh, what's your favorite cologne? What's your favorite scent? What's your favorite. You got to get more into the person. And then you'll start to understand why this doesn't. Whatever it is, whether it's Iceman or whatever. You know what I mean? Like, why this doesn't land with them. Like, why don't you like this? How can you not appreciate this music and this level of artistry? How does this not resonate with you?

[Damaris]

I can understand how things cannot resonate with people, but.

[Mal]

Me, too. No, I get it.

[Damaris]

What people have to learn to say is that things aren't like, this isn't bad just because you don't resonate with it. Just say it's not for you, and that's okay. Sometimes shit just ain't for you.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Like, I do that all the time with Cardi. Play with Cardi.

[Rory]

I don't.

[Mal]

I don't understand. It doesn't resonate with me. I get that he's a star. I get that he has a insane following. It's just that I. It doesn't resonate with me. I'm not saying it's bad. It's terrible. Just for me. It just doesn't. That. That's not where I am now with this Drake album, though. If you're a Drake fan, if you've ever been a fan of Drake, I don't Know how this is not already one of your favorite Drake albums ever? I don't. I don't understand it like this from top to bottom, like Roy said.

[Damaris]

Which one, though? It's three hours. It's three hours, so I don't. I don't. I was gonna say. I don't want to talk about off.

[Mal]

No, no, no. I'm talking about Iceman. I'm talking about Iceman.

[Damaris]

Okay?

[Mal]

Iceman to me is easily like maid of honor. And habibti is just Drake showing off, showing his range of the type of music and the sound and the energy that he can create. That. That's just him. He didn't have to throw the pass behind his back, but he did. You know what I'm saying? It's like you could have just handed it off, but that's him just styling and showing you. Oh, I can do all of that. Let me see what y' all gonna say now. I'm checking all the boxes like you said, Rory. I'm giving you some of this. I'm giving you some of that. I'm being vulnerable. You know, the production is better than it's ever been. You know, Like, I can still dominate the charts whenever I drop. Clearly, the last two years, you see what the culture sounded like without me. Like, okay, let me fill this space for you again, and let me give you all of this music so that no matter where you go, you're gonna hear me somewhere. Whether it's something off a bt, whether it's something off Iceman, whether it's something off maid of honor, wherever you move forward now, where you're traveling, vacationing, partying, whatever you're doing, you are going to hear Drake, and that's what he's showed with this release. Like, I'm gonna do everything with this release. I think that everything with rollouts change after this. If you're one of those artists, the top artists, you now have to completely change the way you roll out and present music.

[Rory]

You have to.

[Damaris]

And what? Change in what way? Be specific about that.

[Mal]

You have to be more creative in your rollout. You have to do things that kind of like, you know, create a new way. Like, you have to. Otherwise, it's not gonna be as entertaining, it's not gonna be as fulfilling. It's gonna just feel like, oh, your album, okay, you recorded the album, you released it, okay? But entertain us, even through the release. Give us something that we never got from you. Show us a different thing like that. This is just. Again, everybody can't afford to do What Drake did, obviously, but the big dogs, the top artists, I think the days of just creating the album and saying, hey, my release date is this, and just releasing it at midnight, I just think that that's, it's going to feel a little bland now at this point.

[Rory]

I, I, I do hear you, but I think the artists at his level still need to reflect who they are. Like Cole, for example. And it's not the tit for tat or anything to do with the battle. Cole, to me, his rollout for falloff was incredible because it was true to him and his story. If he did some over the top shit, and I'm not saying that a bad way because I thought Drake's rollout was incredible. If he did some super over the top thing, it wouldn't feel like Cole. Like, it'd feel like he's trying too hard. Like, this isn't even you. You don't even do this type of shit. I think rollouts still need to be authentic to who you are.

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[Mal]

You know what I'm saying?

[Rory]

And Drake is a moment guy where it needs to be a spectacle. It needs to feel like with him

[Mal]

it was something totally different because of everything that had happened. Obviously everything. Like things were different this time around. But I'm saying if you're one of the top artists in the world, I think the days of just announcing a release date and then your album being available for streaming at midnight, I just think that it kind of is just like, where's the effort in it now? It has to be something different now. I think that's what Drake, he made this moment. Like there has to be, we have to change things. Things have to change. It's the same run of the mill over and over and over, which is why music started to feel boring, which is why the energy was lacking, which is why, you know, you need moments, you need things to kind of remember that time of when, okay, we got this. Like, you need something. Like, again, like Rory said, be true to who you are as an artist. Like, you know, don't do nothing that's outside of your wheelhouse. But there has to be something. It, it has to be. The entertainment level has to, has to rise a little bit more.

[Damaris]

I mean, I, I hear you, but I.

[Mal]

Which is why we get albums and they come and go.

[Damaris]

But no, but no, we get albums and they come and go because they're not always the greatest albums. I feel like I hear you, but like we always say, the musical speak for itself. I feel like with these three albums, the music does speak for itself. I appreciate the spectacle. I'm a spectacle ass bitch. But I don't think that it's necessary. I think him and other artists that follow after him, if the music can stand on its own, the music can stand on its own.

[Mal]

Well, first and foremost, the music has to be good. You can't have an amazing rollout and the music be trash.

[Damaris]

But an amazing rollout will help a lot of trash music stay relevant.

[Mal]

We sat here and praised. We sat here and praised the clips for their rollout. And like Rory and I said they just did the traditional rollout, but it was like, it was so. Everybody was like, oh, my God, it was so amazing. It was like, bro, you know, this is how things used to be. Like, it used to be this. You get what I'm saying? So now, obviously, with the Iceman release, it was different because one Drake is different and the circumstances are different and the moment is different and things like that. The energy is different. So it doesn't have to be on that level. I'm just saying that there has to be more attention to detail because again, we sat back for the last year and a half, two years, no Drake. Everybody's saying music is boring. These are artists saying it's music is boring. We missing this energy. We need this. We need this. Like Drake and Future being back together. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, it's like those things, it's part of what the gap was. And why is there a gap when only one artist decides to fall back and lock in and go in his Batcave and create an amazing piece of art? Like, why is it. Why does music suffer so much when just one person decides that he's gonna fall back and create something and give everybody else time to do their thing? Why does music feel like it's missing so much just because one person decided to fall back for two years?

[Rory]

I mean, I think it's probably because his peers don't make the outside type music that Drake does. So that's where the gap was. I think plenty of rap fans felt like music wasn't missing when they had GNX and fall off. There was just a specific part, which is a huge part of hip hop, which is, what am I listening to outside? And Drake at a way higher clip, makes that type of music amongst his peers better than anyone else at the volume that he does it. So, yeah, there was definitely a part missing. But I wouldn't say music completely felt like it was off.

[Damaris]

No, because that would.

[Rory]

That was album again. We praised, like, there was still stuff. But you did see the gap as far as those moments where, like, we need to hear this song around people. That kind of was missing.

[Mal]

Music was boring.

[Rory]

It was, it was getting there.

[Mal]

Yeah, it was very boring. Rap in particular was very boring.

[Damaris]

Well, you can praise the Don Toliver album the way that y' all did and say that everybody hears it outside.

[Mal]

Thank God Don Toliver released that. Imagine if he didn't release the album.

[Damaris]

But you have Don Toliver. You have gonna. Granted, Drake makes music. I feel like stuff is missing because Drake makes music for the women. So I hear you on that. But y' all praised Don Toliver. Y' all praised Gunna. There were a couple albums that the clips. Like, there were a couple rap albums in past year.

[Rory]

Yeah, like.

[Damaris]

Like as far as outside music. Well, not the clips. The clips is not outside music.

[Rory]

I mean, a lot of. A lot of the projects I loved last year and I even said I thought 2025 was an incredible year for rap. And I think. I think boring is maybe the wrong word because, like, I love the clips. Chance Wale, Larry June, Two Chains, Mob, Deep, Freddie Gibbs, Mac Miller, Jid the Grant. Like, there was plenty of great projects. Everything Mass Appeal did. But as far as, like, what Damaris and I did on Friday night. Yeah, it was. There was no music playing.

[Damaris]

There was no music playing. Shake Ass.

[Rory]

Just the energy.

[Mal]

It was just the energy.

[Rory]

There was a specific part of life that got very boring.

[Mal]

Listen, we both just.

[Rory]

We.

[Mal]

We all sat back the last two years and we lived it, and we were together most of the last two years amongst each other. And it is what it is.

[Rory]

You, you. You only heard music that was a couple years old when you were outside. That is very much a fact.

[Mal]

It's just, you know, it is what it is. Like, you know, we just gotta face the. Face the facts and speak to the facts. And the fact of the matter is, an artist like Drake is absolutely the one artist that dominates the space.

[Rory]

Yeah, and I hear you on the rollout thing. I would just. I'd be scared for artists to do a rollout like that in the music.

[Mal]

No, no, no. Why imagine keep saying a rollout like that. I don't want nobody to try to do this. I'm just saying there has to be something else other than my album at Midnight. Here's the link. It has to be something else. It has to be.

[Rory]

Yeah, but you have to rely on the music being good.

[Mal]

If you're going, oh, the music first and foremost always has.

[Rory]

Like, imagine if Drake did all of that and it's an.

[Mal]

Iceman. Wasn't dope. You know what I'm saying? But the fact that he rolled it out the way he did and then did what he did with the three albums.

[Damaris]

Now I got a question, you bum ass. You knew it was three albums this whole time?

[Mal]

Of course I did.

[Damaris]

That's. Wow. You see, I ain't. You can't trust him.

[Mal]

You can't. Obviously, you can.

[Rory]

Actually, kind of the opposite.

[Mal]

Obviously, you can trust you, obviously.

[Rory]

When. What you mean was that the idea the whole time, like, from inception of.

[Mal]

I don't. I'm not gonna speak to that. I don't know that.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

I just. I just know that for a while, like I said, he. He recorded a lot. You know, I mean, like, he was going obviously for that. Didn't mean he wasn't creating and wasn't working. But, you know, he was. He was gone for a while and he was just recording, recording, recording. And I guess at some point he. He looked up, 40 looked up, and probably future looked up and was like,

[Rory]

dog, like, we have 50 records.

[Mal]

Like, we can do. We can. We can do, like, something incredible with all of this music. Like, we just gotta figure out how we do it.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

But, yeah, I mean, why not? He's given us those sounds before. And again, I just think that it's. It just speaks to, you know, his creative team. It speaks to Drake's work ethic. It speaks to his artistry and his craft, his attention to detail, I think. And he even said on the album that one line, I think he said what he said, isolate me was the worst decision or some shit that he said. Like, I like the fact that he said that because it's real. It's like, here's the thing where I used to give out so much music to other people. Imagine now I become selfish and I keep all of this for myself. There's only three features on Iceman.

[Damaris]

Iceman.

[Rory]

Iceman.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mal]

You get what I'm saying? There's only three future Molly, Santana and 21.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mal]

Quavo. Quavo got the ad libs on Shebang. But, like, this is not a. A feature. Heavy. Like, so now imagine the guy that was once giving out his favorite body else decides, I'm going to keep all of these for myself now, and I'm going to create this. This piece of art that is going to shake the entire industry up.

[Damaris]

Go ahead, Rory.

[Rory]

I'm definitely one of those fans that are selfish that, like, if my favorite artist makes heartbreak music, sometimes when I see them in a happy relationship, I'm like, damn, whatever. As much as a human being, I could say a lot of things that happened to Drake were kind of fucked up. As a person, this and that. As a fan, I'm sort of glad it all happened because he sounded inspired. He sounded. That was my issue with for all the Dogs. Didn't really sound like he was just in autopilot making an album to make it, but it's Drake, so it's going to be at a high level. But comparing him to him, I felt like it was an uninspired Drake up. This felt inspired.

[Mal]

Well, I said that, like, he needed

[Rory]

to get pissed off again. They're calling it whining. He just. I think he needed to get pissed off and need to prove something again. Because when for all the Dogs came out, what the fuck did Drake need to prove? He's a legend. The numbers, everything.

[Mal]

Do it again. That he could keep doing it, that he could be consistent.

[Damaris]

Yeah, that's. I literally said that during the stream where Rory tried to troll me. Like, oh, so you saying like, no, like I'm happy that niggas pissed him off because he was uninspired. I like, I like inspired.

[Mal]

Well, that's what I said. I don't know where we was at, but I said it was a necessary evil. I think I said that here.

[Damaris]

Everything happens for a reason.

[Mal]

Everything happens for a reason. And I think that Drake took his time to identify what that reason was. Because by nature, right, by nature, Drake is a nice guy. And I think in this fuck ass industry, you know, the thing about Drake being a nice guy is he also happens to be probably the most talented artist of his generation. So when you're a nice guy by nature and you're the most talented guy in the room, the room being the industry, you know, sometimes, you know, you think that, you know, people appreciate you and respect you and then one day you look up and realize that, oh no, they were just using you.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

But then once that light bulb goes off and, you know, now you no longer are this nice guy anymore and decide that you're gonna isolate yourself and, you know, keep everything in house, possibly go independent. It's going to be tough for a lot of people from this point on.

[Rory]

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[Mal]

Prove it to me.

[Rory]

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[Mal]

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[Rory]

this episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. May is mental Health Awareness Month, so this is a reminder that whatever you're going through, you don't have to go through it alone. Life is a journey. Some days feel good and others feel overwhelming. Whatever's keeping you up at night, it's easy to feel like you have to figure it all out on your own. But the truth is no one has all of the answers and no journey should be alone. Having someone with you to listen to, understand and support you can make all the difference. If you've been feeling overwhelmed, stuck, anxious or unsure, those feelings are more common than you think. BetterHelp therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the US. BetterHelp does the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goals. A short questionnaire helps you identify your needs and preferences and their 12 plus years of experience and industry leading match fulfillment rate means they typically get it right the first time. If you aren't happy with your match, switch to a different therapist at any time from their tailored recommendations. You don't have to do this journey alone. Find support and have someone with you in therapy. Sign up and get 10% [e-mail] Rorymal that's betterhelp.com Rorymal Support for the show

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[Rory]

Visit wells fargo.com autographjourney Terms apply Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same Premium Wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities. So do like I did and have one of your assistant's assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to [e-mail] Switch upfront payment of $45 for 3

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[Rory]

and I do want to get to the rumors of that private equity firm offering him $2 billion or whatever for his contract and we'll get to that. But before we do, do you think this was a better executed Scorpion? Because I look at the time he's in now and the time coming off the push, a T shirt coming off the shop, people saying that he lost the push and he didn't keep going. The first half of Scorpion I wouldn't say has similar content to Iceman, but it is the hey I'm replying to everyone that I saw say crazy shit about me and then tried to give us the R B side as well. And I like Scorpion. It's not like super super high in my Drake discography, but I do like it. To me this was the better executed, more well thought out Scorpion with with doing the different sounds, separating them, replying to people while making records that will be outside. It's it's Scorpion on steroids. To me it's a more more well executed one I feel like. And you just get the third one. You get the. Honestly, Nevermind part two out of it as well. This the way people say CLB was like the quintessential. This is every Drake sound. I think these three represent that more than anything in this catalog. You get every single bit of Drake out of these. In. In my opinion.

[Mal]

I'm not gonna say it yet, but this might be my favorite Drake album.

[Damaris]

Which one?

[Mal]

Iceman.

[Damaris]

Okay. I'm like, the three came out. I just need us to start gaming.

[Mal]

I'm talking about rap. The other two is just like him just showing like I can make all kind of like there's nothing I can.

[Damaris]

It'll be your favorite Drake rap album or your favorite Drake album. Because I seen how many hours you listen to some sexy songs for you on your. On your wrap up.

[Rory]

But that's just.

[Mal]

Cause that's a R and B. That's like R and B. I'm talking about. When I'm talking about rap.

[Damaris]

Rap.

[Mal]

Like I said, this is some of the best rapping Drake has ever done. Easily. Yeah, make them cry, make them pay. Those are some of the best bars he's ever written, ever recorded. Easily. Like, I don't even think it's close. I think that he was on another level with his lyricism.

[Damaris]

And I also think that releasing three albums takes him away from the constraint of. Like we've said before, Drake tries to please. He has a wide plethora of fans and he tries to please his entire array of fans, usually within a 20 track album. So when you release yourself from the shackles of that and you put three folders and it's like, no, I can rap as much as I want to without having to please the R and B, the R and B crowd, because I have an album for them, or trying to please the doing Coke and Ibiza crowd because I have an album for them. Like, I feel like it kind of takes a weight off your shoulder. Like I can say whatever the fuck I want to say because I have something for them. This. This is for the rap fans. So I think that that helps too.

[Rory]

Do we think outside tweaking was a. A little petty dig at. At Ice Spice? I never knew what the Ice Spice and Drake beef was or the beef. There was. There was some. Something that was kind of unclear. But I mean, we're stunning. Sandy people have, you know, obviously accused her of sounding exactly like Ice Spice and kind of doing like a carbon copy of it. I. That it was the first thing that popped in my. My Mind not to say that stunned Sandy doesn't, you know, have her own fans and make her own music for the people that like that. I'm not taking away her talent, but I think it. I think it was a little ice spice dick, that's all.

[Damaris]

I don't think he thinks that much into it. I think Drake has always. I see where you're coming from, but I think Drake has always ran to what was the newest. Like, Drake doesn't want the people who are already put on. He prefers to get people before they become popular or cool. That's been him his whole career, and I think that just might be. Might be part of it.

[Mal]

You didn't listen to Habib T yet.

[Damaris]

I haven't. That's the one I've listened to the least.

[Rory]

All right. Because that on that joint Fair Maid of honor is ones I've listened to the least. PT WNBA, Slap the City Classic, Gen 5, Fort Worth. He was growing on me. I didn't know where Drake was taking us when he said he was lonely in America, but he landed the song. Like, when he first came on, I was a little like, okay, yo, niggas

[Mal]

can't with Drake, man.

[Rory]

I'm telling you, he's lonely in America.

[Mal]

This is like, for this. For this to all be the same artist making all of this music, this is fucking insane, bro. This is like, in. Even if. Even if you put an artist in a room with a bunch of producers and they're like, okay, this is the song we're gonna record, like, to be able to execute it is like, bro, this is un. We've never seen this before from one artist. These, like, three different sounds like this, and they're all at a high level. It's not like, oh, he kind of struggled on this one. Yeah, he didn't really like. No, he really. You really would believe that this is the type of music he makes all the time. It doesn't sound like an experiment. Like, he really sounds like he lives in those worlds.

[Damaris]

I'm queen of. Like, when I saw the sexy red features or heard about the sexy red features, I was like, please, God, I don't know what it is with his. His sexy red is his emotional attachment dog. Like, I don't. Not calling her a dog, but you know what I mean? But when I heard her on the songs, when I heard him on. When I heard her on the songs, I said, I can't think of anybody else that could have executed that the way that this is. Like, this makes sense. Like, she makes sense. Where she is placed here. What was I going to say? Made her honor or. Honestly, Never mind, Ma, because I know you like. Honestly, nevermind.

[Mal]

I love Honestly Never mind. That album is incredible. I got. I gotta. I gotta listen to. I gotta move around with Maidavan a little more.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mal]

Habibt is more R B. So it's like, you know, I get that. I get that right away. Maid of honor is like. But I saw it. I saw glimpses of it. I saw glimpses of it. I know what it's gonna do.

[Damaris]

So Ma, how about you go outside with me and my friends? Come outside with me and my friends and play maid of honor. Oh, man, let's get the Sprinter.

[Mal]

It sound like I'm gonna need fucking BC powder.

[Rory]

They're making you the maid of honor. You're gonna be the bell of the ball.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah. That just sounds that just. You just scared me with that one. Going outside with a bunch of like 20 something year olds.

[Damaris]

Oh, thank you.

[Mal]

Well, early 30 year olds. It's all the same. Trust me. It's just a number.

[Rory]

Yeah. Damaris, she had him with him Friday night.

[Mal]

Yeah. Can I think about it? Because I'm tempting you. Tempting A. I ain't gonna lie. I'm tempted to do it, but it's just like. Woo. I know what that comes with.

[Damaris]

Oh, wait. I'm Major and Mitch. Me, Major and Mitch and the bad bitches with Made an honor playing in a Sprinter.

[Mal]

No, that's too much. It's too much. It's just too much going on.

[Damaris]

You had a time of your life.

[Rory]

Three Red Bulls. You might need some coke.

[Mal]

Yeah, it's just too much happening. Like. I just wanted.

[Damaris]

No, I'm gonna hit Mitch. I'm gonna hit Mitch.

[Mal]

We're gonna set that up, take a shower and watch First 48, man. That's what I want to do. Man.

[Damaris]

You wasn't doing. Now, I don't do that. Cause you was over there screaming for the fireworks and when you was with Drake. Scream for me, Mitchell. Major.

[Mal]

Yeah, that was. That's my guy. I was happy for my guy. See, why would I. Why would. Why would I show him happy for a friend. Like, see, it's. It's a problem. But if I'm sitting there and I ain't say, it's like, oh, this hating, it's. It's either. It's one way or another, either.

[Damaris]

Yo, there's a middle ground and you win.

[Mal]

Ain't no middle ground. Would you tell her the middle ground doesn't exist? You're either glazing. You're either glazing or hating.

[Damaris]

The middle ground exists.

[Mal]

There's no middle ground.

[Damaris]

It was the reverb on the laugh. It was the reverb on the.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Echo. You can physically see the echo moving.

[Mal]

It was a lot behind that. It was a lot behind that C

[Rory]

note on that one.

[Mal]

Yeah, it was a lot behind that. Yeah. You gotta understand what was going on, everything that happened for that moment to happen. Yeah.

[Rory]

You're enamored by the fireworks.

[Mal]

No, I was happy for my guy, man. You know what I'm saying? I was happy for him. Anytime you're a creative and you know, obviously we're creatives and to think of something and be able to put it together and execute it and it goes the way you. That's not easy to do, especially on that scale. So to see it happen and to see, you know, somebody you respect and somebody you fuck with execute something that they've worked on for a long time and like, for it to finally be done. And it was like that laugh was a lot of things that we spoke about in private. Like. You know what I'm saying? It was like, all right.

[Damaris]

It was a victory laugh.

[Mal]

He kept telling. He kept saying, like, yo, this you not. You don't even understand what's about to happen.

[Damaris]

Ryan, can you play the laugh for me?

[Mal]

Okay, cool.

[Damaris]

Never giggled as hard when he was with me. It was that part.

[Rory]

It was that.

[Damaris]

It was that.

[Rory]

There's a lot of wise on the. Yeah, I was.

[Damaris]

Yeah, stop it.

[Rory]

Like, if you were to text that. Yeah. How many wise do you think of

[Damaris]

the yo, like, I like you. I thought when I first saw the video, I was playing it on mute. I was like, oh, mall. Hanging with Drake, whatever. And then the second time I played it and I just heard the yeah. And I'm like, all right. That too excited. It was when I let it play and I heard that echo and laugh. I said, all right. That's why they called.

[Mal]

Happy for your friends.

[Damaris]

This why they killing my man.

[Mal]

Like, you can't be happy for your friends no more.

[Damaris]

More.

[Rory]

It was a double year. I mean, I guess cuz it's three albums you wanted to give extra year.

[Damaris]

But ma, you heard Rory with them. Laughs. You would tear Rory up for at least a week.

[Rory]

You kind.

[Mal]

Yeah, of course you tear me up. I'm not.

[Rory]

Which we did on Patreon. That's why I'm chilling now.

[Damaris]

I already got.

[Rory]

I got all my jokes on.

[Mal]

Yeah. I'm not saying I'm not Saying that you ain't what to tear me up.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Okay, good. As long as you don't love.

[Mal]

But yeah, n. Just know it was a lot behind that, like.

[Damaris]

Yeah, for sure.

[Mal]

Yeah. Congrats on doing exactly what you said you was going to do and being exactly who you said you are. Salute to that. Yeah. Every time.

[Rory]

And. And I. I wanted to kill Maul again, which we did on Patreon. But I was secretly jealous that you got to hang out with Shane Gillis.

[Mal]

Shane. Shout out to Shane Gillis.

[Rory]

I was. I was kind of hating on the low, like, damn, Morgan's. Hang out with Shane.

[Mal]

Shout out to Shane Gillis, man. Cool, dude, man. Shout out to Shane. Shane is like, he's peach, bro.

[Rory]

That's why we were talking on the phone.

[Mal]

I say the same, yo. Same demeanor, same like, you know, when you. You and somebody only like, catch something and it's like he just happens to be one of the funniest guys in the world right now. So. Shout out to Mark. Mark was trying to introduce Shane to Noel. I think Noel was DJing, right? So, you know, Shane was going over saying what's up to the guys? And so me and him was talking. So then, like, Mark was trying to get Noel's attention to say, what's up to Shane. But Mark was in his own kind of twisted, still DJing. So did Shay. Shay was standing there like this with his cup, right? And he just looked at me. He was like, I don't think this gu guys interested in meeting me, Yo. But I knew he was feeling it. Cause I'm looking, I'm like, yo, Noel don't want to meet nobody. He drunk, he DJing, he partying. It's like, this ain't the time to meet nobody and shake hands.

[Rory]

And what time do you get your self respect back? Like after the third, like, ew. Yeah, yeah. Like.

[Mal]

And I'm just standing there.

[Rory]

I'm just like, all right, I want to turn around. Yeah.

[Mal]

It's like, I'm not that important of a person to meet. I guess it's a party. Like, let him, you know, have his fun. But nah, Shane was cool. Shout out to Shane Gillisman. Shout out to KD too. KD was there. Katie said he gonna come on the POD and talk some shit. We had some. Some interesting conversations.

[Rory]

Yeah. The fans are owed a good Rory Maul Katy rap debate. I don't want to talk about basketball, nothing. All I like to do is argue with KD about music.

[Mal]

Yeah, no, we was talking, man. KD has some Interesting things to say to me. Like, it's interesting, but I fuck with kd. That's my nigga, man. But he said he gonna come kick with us, so.

[Rory]

So it was K. It was just pretty much his crew, kd. Shane.

[Mal]

It was just the crew, man. It was just, you know, his home team, you know, Again, I think this era, Drake is very isolated with just the people he loves and trusts and, you know, family. I think that's what this. This era of Drake is.

[Rory]

Well, Toronto being, you know, the capital of beautiful women. I'll say Toronto is one of my

[Mal]

favorite cities in the world, man.

[Rory]

Most beautiful women I've ever seen. What a lot of cultures. What was the ratio? Like that. And of course, you know, women like Drake. And it's a party and it's Toronto.

[Mal]

Oh, the after party was cool. It was a nice vibe in there. Good vibe in there, man.

[Rory]

You shot shots.

[Mal]

Drake gave away a bunch of Chanel bags and like that, you know, just. Just Drake just. Ladies, take a raffle ticket. And if. If Noel calls your number, you got a new Chanel. It's just a regular night with ovo. You know how that go, man. That giving out Chanel's like napkins.

[Rory]

Rich people get so bored.

[Mal]

Oh, man, crazy. She got. She won that. Now she started crying and I was

[Damaris]

like, God, that's embarrassing, bro.

[Mal]

I mean, you know. Is it?

[Damaris]

Yes. I mean, you know, that's embarrassing. Like, come on now, go in the bathroom and cry. Should nobody see you crying?

[Mal]

She was crying right there. She ain't give a. I gotta ask that.

[Rory]

Were any men in the line to get the Chanel raffle?

[Mal]

Oh, you know, they see, no man could get no raffle ticket.

[Rory]

Yo, imagine if a guy went up to the table.

[Mal]

That's not happening, bro. But shot. It was a good night, though, man. Good vibes, good energy. It's a lot of love. And again, shout out to the OVO family, man, it's always good seeing them and it's always love and respect whenever I get to see those guys. So salute to the man. Congrats to them, man on, you know, again, something major. Salute to Drake for doing everything he said he would and, you know, creating something, a moment that I don't think we'll forget. And music that I think will be. Will age as. Age gracefully as well. I think the music is only. These three albums are only going to sound better as time goes on.

[Rory]

How do we think he's going to do the tour? And we will move on? But it was, you know, Obviously a big moment.

[Mal]

It's a big moment. It's the biggest moment.

[Rory]

How do we think he does this, this tour? I almost feel like he needs to split it up. The way he split the albums up. Like, I'm not saying straight blueprint, reasonable doubt, different nights at Yankee Stadium. But you could do the rap night. You could do the R B night, you could do international music night.

[Damaris]

That's insane.

[Mal]

I said years ago, Drake should do a woman only tour. Ladies only.

[Rory]

That would be good. Definitely stir up Fox News of. Of, you know, is this equal? Is this allowed? At least a lot of people.

[Mal]

He's the only artist, I think, that could pull that off.

[Damaris]

Chris Brown could pull it off too.

[Rory]

Chris Brown could definitely pull it off.

[Mal]

Well, I'm talking to my rap.

[Damaris]

Oh, okay.

[Mal]

Talking about rap. Yeah, I think. I think that that should be. That's like a. A different type of flex. Like women only at the shows.

[Rory]

But then it gets confusing with that community. That's when you got to tell me how we check. That's what I'm saying. In theory, it's a great idea, but there's just so many factors in it that is just gonna get somebody in trouble and maybe just leave it alone. But there could be a cool way for him to split up. But maybe like in the major cities, like Barclays is the R and B shit, that rap for the Garden. Like, it could be cool for something like that.

[Mal]

I feel like live stream it. Like him leaving one stadium, that would be hard. Going to the other, like for the Iceman.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

And then go there for Habib teasers, Women only.

[Rory]

That would be cool. I think he has an opportunity to do something very creative with the story.

[Mal]

No, for sure. I mean, I think that's the zone he's in. I think he's just another level of creativity, another level of entertainment. I think that's where he's at.

[Damaris]

You're gonna actually ask for my tickets this time? You ain't asked last time. I get it was a tense time. Like, you actually gonna ask this time.

[Mal]

Sending me that aisle emoji and my DM ain't gonna meant nothing.

[Damaris]

Yo, they said Rory, the one I sent it.

[Mal]

That's hilarious.

[Rory]

I have never sent Drake and I. I will let you guys go through my DMs with Drake. You could scroll through the years of them. I promise you there's not an hour. Promise you there's not an hour. There's some art, but there's no.

[Mal]

It's not an owl. You know what it is? You know, the little egg with the chicken that's about to hatch. That's what he said.

[Damaris]

That's his birth as owl.

[Mal]

That's what he said.

[Damaris]

Nurturing our nature.

[Mal]

Oh, my God.

[Rory]

No, I have not. But hatching.

[Mal]

Oh, and everybody was killing me. I'm here for my flowers. I told y' all this. Did not speak to J. Cole. Y' all like, Nah, Cole said they spoke. He went on. He went on so and so and said. I mean, I will say, why would I get hit? Why would I sit up here? A lot of people, like, just. I wouldn't do.

[Damaris]

You lied before.

[Mal]

Lie. I may have been wrong about something. I've never lied.

[Damaris]

Okay, all right. You're right.

[Mal]

Lying is good. Me sitting up here knowing I'm lying is crazy. I've never done. That's.

[Damaris]

That's all right. Don't mar. There's been some weekends you told us you was alone. You wasn't alone. We've all lied on this podcast before.

[Mal]

Oh, about my dick game? Yeah. I'm lying about that. I'm talking about, like, that people really care about. Like, y' all just be nosy trying to know what I'm saying. I'm not telling y'.

[Damaris]

All.

[Rory]

Yeah, I don't think you left that after party alone, I'll tell you that.

[Damaris]

Oh, for a show.

[Mal]

No, no, I definitely did. For sure.

[Rory]

Okay, but then they just met you at the hotel.

[Mal]

No.

[Rory]

You left them.

[Mal]

No, I went. I went back to the room and I ordered some room service and went to sleep. Yeah, for sure.

[Rory]

Well, I will give you your flowers. That pretty much everything that you did say on this pod that you did get killed for turned out to be 100, right? So.

[Mal]

Nah.

[Damaris]

But.

[Rory]

But they're not. But, no, they don't care. But they don't care about that. At this point, they're still going to be.

[Mal]

I don't want those flowers. Don them. Send that extra dollar when you check out a CVS to starving children around the world. St. Jude's yeah, St. Jude. I don't want no flowers like your flowers. That's. That's the mode. I'm in dragging this Iceman mode. I'm in my. Them flowers. I don't want them flowers. That.

[Rory]

Okay. Is there any truth that you're aware of. Of this private equity move now that he's out of his deal? Allegedly.

[Mal]

I don't know nothing about that.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mal]

Because I know that whatever he end up getting, he going to shake the world, nigga. I know that. Everything changes.

[Rory]

There was no like, reputable source that

[Mal]

was putting this out, but it's never a reputable source. If it didn't come from him.

[Rory]

Allegedly, he is now completely done with his UMG obligations. I don't know that if that's true.

[Mal]

I don't know if that's true either.

[Rory]

But I can definitely see a bunch of private equity firms obviously wanting to invest in the future career of Drake.

[Mal]

UMG is going to do everything in their powers to make Drake happy and not lose him.

[Rory]

That's if.

[Mal]

That means if Drake. If Drake holds up five fingers and says that's what. That's all he got. That's his negotiation five. We know what letter is after the five. We don't even have to talk about that. Just hold up five fingers. And I think Universal says done.

[Rory]

You think Universal would give artists $5 billion?

[Mal]

I think they will give Drake $5 billion.

[Rory]

5 billion.

[Mal]

I think they will give Drake 5 billion. Because if they'll give you 2 or 3, what's the difference?

[Rory]

2 or 3?

[Mal]

It's a lot of. No, it's not at that level. No, it's not. You give me 3 billion, you can give me 5 billion.

[Rory]

I. I don't know how big.

[Mal]

Then they don't have it. Then they're like, ah, that's a little stretch.

[Rory]

No, Universal, how much money do you

[Mal]

think Drake has generated for UMG over the years?

[Rory]

Over 5 billion.

[Mal]

Exactly. So what are we talking about? We sitting here acting like what I'm saying is crazy. Oh. Because we've never seen one artist get that. I understand that part of it. Yes.

[Rory]

I think you're missing what we're saying,

[Damaris]

but I think y' all are.

[Rory]

We think that Universal has 5 billion.

[Damaris]

I don't. I need. Okay, hold on. What? No, no, wait. Okay, I. I hear y'. All right. But the difference between 2 and 3 million is completely different from. Is. Than the difference between 1 and 2 billion.

[Mal]

Like 2 and 3 million.

[Damaris]

Like, they're like. What I'm saying is the difference. So when we hear like, oh, if they could give me 5 million, they could give me 7 million for sure, right? There's. There's not that big of a difference between 5 and 7 million. There is a very big difference between 3 and. I just.

[Mal]

No, it's not at that level. If you at that level at the negotiating table, and they put three on the table, they got five. It's called negotiation.

[Rory]

What they have and what they'll give, they got.

[Mal]

They're going in there like, yo, we gonna give them five but let's shoot the three. Your. Your job is to negotiate up to the five. That's the. That's called negotiation. They got it. They got it.

[Damaris]

No, I'm not saying. What I'm saying is. There's just. Let's not say there's not a big difference.

[Mal]

There's a. I'm saying at that level.

[Damaris]

Humongous.

[Mal]

There's a humongous difference between 100 million and. Yes, but if you're offering me 3 billion and I want 5, we already having a billion dollar conversation. Like, what's the difference? I hear you now. Trillion. Oh, yeah, now we. In a whole nother ballpark.

[Rory]

But all right. I mean, AI says that UMG is worth 45 billion, so we're not saying.

[Mal]

So now I say to you, Damaris, if Drake walks in and you are in danger of losing this artist, to go independent and make all of this money, and he wants 5 billion, and you're worth 45 billion, you don't give him 5 billion.

[Damaris]

Oh, I'm not saying that. I'm just saying there's a billion. I just want the shirty numbers of. I just want us to.

[Mal]

At that level, there's no difference. It's just called dragging your nuts. There's no difference. There's no difference at that level between 3 billion and 5 billion. We already having a billion dollar conversation. There's no difference. Now, if you're walking in there with 100 million and somebody coming there with a billion. Yeah, you gonna. It's a difference there, but we're. We're already negotiating billions of dollars. My ego says I want five. What you gonna do? Let me walk out of here?

[Rory]

I'd prefer for him to take the three with a private equity and see where that goes. I think he'd probably make more money with a private equity company.

[Mal]

I mean, then you're getting into the nuances of just business. I'm just saying.

[Rory]

To see what. What, an artist like Drake leaving. Yeah, but sometimes.

[Mal]

Sometimes you got to sit down at the table where, you know, people pulled a little funny move and, you know, you just got to watch them sweat a little bit. You know what I'm saying? That's just. That's called negotiation, Rory. Sit at the table with the people that did some dirty and pulled up, pulled a funny style move and just watch them beg. Sometimes you got to do that.

[Rory]

It'd be so cool to be Drake's lawyer right now. I get 5% or whatever you pick.

[Damaris]

It would be so cool to be Drake's lawyer. On any day, like, just keep me on retainer.

[Rory]

Yeah. I don't even know what if 5% or whatever the. That level of lawyering is. I don't even know what those deals look like.

[Mal]

I think he gets it.

[Rory]

I mean, we'll see. I'm. I'm very interested, just as a music nerd, where. Where that goes, because it is as

[Mal]

far as he goes, what he chooses.

[Rory]

Yeah. Because either way, he's going to make more money than he needs. But I. I think it. What that looks like if he's independent with just private equity backing him. I. I want to know what that looks like in this day and age.

[Mal]

See, and that's the thing, like, and that's what I was trying to explain to Damaris in so many words is at this point, it's just all about, you know, the number is the number he can already afford himself a life of luxury forever. It's not even about now. It's just about the status. Yeah, but see, now everybody knows the deal and sees it and sees it happen. And I'm the first, you know, artist to ever receive a deal like this. It's that it's not about. Yes, the money obviously is. Come on, we talking about billions of dollars. We know that, but what I'm saying is, to your point, Rory, what can he do with that deal that he hasn't already done?

[Rory]

It would be the first time an artist of that level would not be under a major. And I'm very curious what that would do to the music industry.

[Mal]

Oh, no, you told me. I'm saying, as far as if. If the UMG deal, if they give him.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mal]

That money, that's just a stat.

[Rory]

Oh, for sure. And. But I'm not. I'm not one of those people. I'm a capitalist in that regard. If a rich person has this type of market value, and we're looking like, does he need any more money? Not that you should get what you're owed for what you do. I don't care if you have A billion dollars.

[Mal]

One million.

[Rory]

If you're bringing in 10, 15 of UMGS, and please don't quote me on that stat. I'm really just talking right now. If you're bringing in 10, 15 of an entire company's rep, like revenue stream, and then you crunch those numbers. Yeah, I. You need to be paid that. I don't care if you're a billionaire already.

[Mal]

Exactly.

[Rory]

You're owed that.

[Mal]

That's.

[Rory]

And I don't know if that's like capitalism, but. No, that's how it works. Pay us what you owe us.

[Mal]

Like, pay us what you owe us. You got it. I generated it and I want some of it back.

[Rory]

Yeah. And what else? Have a sob story for UMG that's worth 45 billion. I think they need to pay everybody more, but, you know, we'll see where that goes.

[Mal]

That.

[Rory]

That is going to be one of the biggest deals. I don't mean money wise. I just mean in general for the music business. Then I think Mike Versoni, like, this is like industry changing shit depending on where this goes.

[Mal]

Absolutely. This. This changes everything, but, like, not even. And that's just on the business side. Yeah. I'm saying all around. I think what he's doing is changing everything. It's changing music. It's changing the way, you know, artists create and, you know, the way you roll out your music. And it's all of those things, man. I think it's all. I think a lot of. A lot of things changed Thursday night. I think that everybody. All, you know, all the artists that are, you know, the artists that we all look to and like, that's the biggest artist in the world. I think every one of them were inspired in some form of fashion. And all of them sat down with their creative circle and started thinking after that. And then once, you know, the deal happens or whatever after that, then it's a whole nother part of the think tank. Like, holy shit. That's gonna set off a. You know, that's a domino effect after that, for sure. You gotta think about with artists like a bad Bunny or somebody, when they come to the table now, what they gonna negotiate.

[Rory]

Well, I mean, I think some of the majors are already a little nervous by all of private equity buying up the artist. The artist portion of their publishing.

[Mal]

Right.

[Rory]

Because private equity sees the value in owning a catalog now that things can be streamed and up to different places. And.

[Mal]

Right.

[Rory]

There's a dollar value every time it's played somewhere. It's part of content. So that's why I'm saying if Drake is backed by private equity, where he doesn't have to live within the major label rules, everything changes. That's a. That's why I'd rather him do that than get 5 billion from UMG and everything kind of just stays the same.

[Mal]

That's all you want. You want to see the shift happen?

[Rory]

Hell, yeah.

[Mal]

I agree. I like that.

[Rory]

Yeah. Absolutely. Mall Today's show is brought to you by our presenting sponsor, Hard Rock BET Florida Sportsbook. I was going crazy over the weekend with Preakness and I turned out.

[Mal]

I did.

[Rory]

I did all right, man.

[Mal]

Made a little coin.

[Rory]

Yeah, it was my first time betting on the ponies. Yeah, and I had fun doing it. But also we have Eastern Conference finals are here. The lights are brighter, the pressure is

[Mal]

higher, the city is buzzing.

[Rory]

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[Mal]

You know what you gotta do first though, right, Rory?

[Rory]

What's that?

[Mal]

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[Rory]

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[Damaris]

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[Rory]

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[Rory]

Doctor Cheyenne Bryant went on the Breakfast Club and a couple other platforms that I saw the clips. I'll be truthful with you guys, I did not know who this was until all of this has been going viral. People been asking her to show her doctorate degree degrees degrees. I'm Sorry, my apologies. And if there was any legitimacy to them, and we don't even know that because she can't even provide them. She went on the Breakfast Club and gave a little bit more insight because the other clips I saw, people would interview her and be like, hey, can you just, like, show people a degree? What's the big deal with that? And she'd say things like, I only answer to God. I don't. I don't need to answer to humans about my degree. Which, I mean, if I'm going into a doctor's office, I don't care what the practice is. I feel like you owe God and us your degree. That's a pretty fair ask. But she explained on the Breakfast Club that the school that she went to just disappeared. They ran out of funding. And then some other company kept the records of her degree, but only for two years. And it was past the limitations, so that no longer exists, so she can't pull her. Her degree. And they even offered in the financial aid office to give her her money back for her degree. So all of this really seems like it's checking out the third.

[Damaris]

Mind you, they sent the records to a third party. She's saying that the third party offered her her money back because they didn't have her records. That makes no fucking sense to me. No disrespect to Dr. Cheyenne Bryant, but that makes no sense.

[Rory]

I'm just reporting what she said on. On the Breakfast Club.

[Mal]

I have no idea what the y' all are talking about. I'm learning. I'm hearing all in real time.

[Rory]

I'm just telling you that financial aid, if there's one thing they're never gonna do, even if they're wrong, is give you your money back. Number two, if you finish a program and get a degree and they don't have the degree, they don't. They don't pay you back. This is not really how things work. I mean, I can laugh at her just tripling down on all of this and. And continuing on that. She is. She has multiple degrees and she only answers to God. But, I mean, she even said, you've seen my sessions live, bro. You was talking to Shannon Sharp about, like, being choked during sex. I don't know what sessions we're talking about here.

[Damaris]

Here's the thing about media, and I just don't even want to make this about her, because we're in this. This world of being media personalities, too. You. You can't lie about your credentials or falsely lead people to a promised land. That's not there. We say all the time, we're just people who like music. We don't know everything. We don't have all the inside knowledge. We have some, but there's plenty of shit we don't know. And sometimes it's okay just to give your opinion. I'm not going to present my opinion like it's a fact.

[Rory]

And even if I present my opinion about an album, it's not going to affect anyone's life. If I go see a doctor, I'm there for a reason that could actually directly affect my life. If you are not who you say you are.

[Mal]

Yeah. I think that's a fair, like a fair assessment. Yeah. I need you to be who you say you are. Yeah.

[Rory]

And I mean, of course that goes without saying with medical doctors, but even with therapists. Like, like she claims to do child and family therapist and like, has clients and runs a. Like that's, that's illegal. Like you're with people's lives.

[Damaris]

Well, to be fair, you don't need, you don't need a doctorate to do that. Like, true.

[Rory]

You can do.

[Damaris]

Honestly, you could be do that with a two year degree, maybe even a four year. You don't need a doctorate to do that. But the putting the doctor before your name, and this is all alleged because like I said, I do not know that beautiful woman. This could be true. But putting the doctor before your name, you lead with that as your tag name, as your main name because you know that it gives people a sense of credibility when it comes towards you. Like, it gives you a sense of credibility when it comes to people. So they're more likely to listen to what you're saying because you're showing yourself

[Rory]

to be that you don't have the same energy for Dre.

[Damaris]

Who.

[Rory]

Dr. Dre. Like, where's your energy for him?

[Damaris]

I have no energy for Dr. Dre or Dr. J.

[Mal]

Like, none of us remember, oh, he was play basketball.

[Rory]

So like, I hear you, but I mean, why are we giving this woman all this flack when I know plenty of doctors that. That their personalities. Yeah, maybe she's a personality playing a doctor.

[Damaris]

Okay, wouldn't say that then. I don't think Dr. Dre would ever look me in my face and be like, nah, I got degrees. You don't know about them. No.

[Rory]

You think I would if I ever saw Dr. Umar? Would not refer to him as Dr. Umar.

[Mal]

You got me.

[Rory]

I would 100%. So Dr. Umar, hello.

[Damaris]

Dr. Umar is. Is. Has his doctorate.

[Rory]

I don't know.

[Damaris]

I don't he's provided all the. The. He has his doctorate.

[Mal]

Oh, if he. If he didn't, they would have exposed that. No.

[Damaris]

Yeah, he has his doctor now. They say he scammed in other ways. They say he collect.

[Rory]

Maybe. That's what I'm thinking. But at school.

[Damaris]

That school was never built. That's another thing. But no, Dr. Umar has a doctorate in psychology.

[Rory]

Oh, then, yeah, she looks crazy.

[Mal]

I mean, what was my man name? The. The. The. The young boy that. That said he was a doctor.

[Rory]

Oh, I can see. I can see his.

[Damaris]

He got the picture like this.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Rory]

He got the glasses.

[Mal]

He got. He got the sickest off in history.

[Rory]

Probably, though, he put on, like, it was a legit, like, Halloween costume that he put on. Can you type in Dr. Skillet?

[Damaris]

That shit was fake black Dr.

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[Mal]

As a white man, you typed in fake black doctor.

[Rory]

Dr. Umar would not be happy about that. Yeah. This guy, fake teen doctor.

[Mal]

What was his name?

[Damaris]

Malachi Love Robinson.

[Rory]

Of course.

[Mal]

His middle name is Love Malachi Love.

[Damaris]

Well, Love Robinson is hyphenated, so it sounds like those are his two last names.

[Rory]

Yeah, but, yeah, he was arrested for this, but he was really taking, like, payments.

[Mal]

Yeah, he was taking money. He was arrested for fraud and larceny after he was accused of using one of his clients checking accounts to pay off 34,000 in car payments. Oh, yeah.

[Damaris]

Damn. They didn't even catch him for the fake doctor shit. He did some fraud, and then they was like, oh, you a fake doctor, too?

[Mal]

No, no, that was. He was arrested again for that.

[Damaris]

That was another charge.

[Rory]

Repeat offender.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

No, he's. He's. He's the real life Catch me if you can.

[Mal]

He was sentenced to five years in prison with four of those being suspended.

[Damaris]

That's crazy.

[Rory]

Well, the Catch Me if youf Can. I know. The movie dramatized that real story a bit. That is a real guy. But he's also a scammer in himself. So he may be scamming about his scam store story. Oh, yeah, But I mean, in the movie, he was a doctor at one point, but all he did was, like, run the schedule. But not still. Like, if I come in with a stab wound, let me see a degree. Like, I need to know that this is a legitimate place.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Hey, man, she getting her money. And let's be honest, this is gonna sound nasty, but I don't give a. If y' all are so easily tricked by slick words from people who speak on mics, us included, then that's on you. If you are taking life advice.

[Rory]

You're not scamming anyone.

[Damaris]

I know we're not, but she's also not taking money. Like, she. She's just going around. She's a media personality, so it's not like she out here, like, really, like, grifting. Grifting. She's a media person.

[Rory]

I'm sure.

[Damaris]

I'm sure she has some type of paid platform or a patreon. I'm sure she has something like that. But if you are taking life advice from people on the Internet who you do not have, have their degree, are paying them anything, that's who you're taking life advice from, and you're taking it seriously, then I'm not mad at them, and you shouldn't be mad at them either. Let's speak.

[Rory]

Yeah, I'm not here to debate who people get their advice from on the Internet because we could go in circles about that. But, I mean, Kevin Samuels never said he was a doctor. Like, that's the difference.

[Damaris]

Yeah, for sure.

[Rory]

She doesn't need that doctrine. Like, is that the allure? Because I think people are easily persuaded to your point when you can talk very well and especially if you're leaning in the mental health world. Yes. You could easily get people to subscribe to. When you're pretty and you subscribe to without you saying you're a doctor. Like, you could still do that.

[Damaris]

You're a pretty woman. Woman who knows how to use her. Well, that was about to sound crazy. You're a pretty woman who knows how to use her words, and you do have some type of education. People will listen to you. The doctor is unnecessary.

[Rory]

Where's our Argosy University?

[Damaris]

Argosy. I don't know. California.

[Rory]

Yeah, that should look like a Chipotle instead of Seattle. There's one in.

[Mal]

Oh, so multiple.

[Rory]

Multiple locations. Yes. She went to this. The main one is.

[Mal]

Okay, well, that one in Seattle is permanently closed.

[Rory]

No, they're all permanently closed. Is there any other doctors, though, that, like, do we know, like, go to notable alumni. Can we scroll down to that on Wikipedia, please? Every school has notable alumni on their Wikipedia. I need to know who else went here.

[Mal]

Malachi loves.

[Rory]

Definitely went there.

[Damaris]

Oh, they had mad. They had mad campus. First of all, I'm not. I'm not gonna hold you. Even if she did get her doctor doctor, I don't want no therapist who went to a chain school. Like, they got Red Lobster locations, like, online Phoenix, Pittsburgh, Art Institute of Hollywood, Art institute.

[Mal]

There's like, 15 alma mater. Don't do that.

[Damaris]

Huh?

[Mal]

You said what you hating on Alma mater? Don't do that.

[Damaris]

That's crazy.

[Rory]

I go to their homecoming every October.

[Damaris]

Why the. They got so many campuses.

[Rory]

I love the noofs over there. Yo, we got a. The noofs are heavy over there.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Yo, and I'm sure half those locations, like, you know how some people use PO boxes for, like, their LLCs and their business? Like, it's not a real location. You just got a mailbox there. Yeah, that's my guess. With. With all those locations.

[Damaris]

What the.

[Mal]

Listen, man.

[Damaris]

To take it all the way to Dr. Or some like, that is crazy. And now I believe her that they only held her records for two years.

[Rory]

But don't you have your degree? Granted, I didn't graduate college, so I. I have no reason to even laugh at this, but you. You don't. You get a degree?

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Like, would. You misplaced it.

[Damaris]

They mail it to your house, and it's, like, legit.

[Rory]

Like, they can look at it and be like, this is a degree.

[Damaris]

Yeah. If I went to school for that long to the point where I had a doctorate, I'm gonna make sure I have my degree. I'm not gonna wait.

[Mal]

Especially if you buy social media and, you know, you're becoming a personality. Like, you got to understand that people are going to look for those things at some point and be like, yo, what? You went to school at doctorate?

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mal]

That's where you got to know. People gonna dig. They're gonna look for it. So, you know.

[Rory]

But I saw one tweet.

[Mal]

This was.

[Rory]

She was on Basketball Wives before she was a doctor. Is that how people know her?

[Damaris]

Oh, I don't.

[Rory]

I'm out the loop.

[Damaris]

I have no clue. I. The first time I saw her was talking to. It had to be some. Some man. It was some. Some man with a mic. No, I don't know who it was.

[Rory]

Yeah, she appeared on Basketball Wives while she provides mental health commentary and life coaching. Listen, anyone can be a life coach. And. Cool. Cool if. If you can get people to coach, great. Yeah. We're just landing on the doctor part. But that's not like you can't dance this much with something you could just provide, like, that's. That's kind of crazy.

[Damaris]

Yeah. But she has come out and says she's not a licensed therapist. She has come out plenty of times, say, I'm not licensed because I can work differently without a license that I can with. When you have a license, you're held to certain ethical standards.

[Rory]

Yeah, I should. I know therapists like that as well. And I've been to a bunch of different therapists and of course go to better help. But yeah, some. Some people prefer that. Outside of the realm of filling out a bunch of stuff and just meet with somebody you feel could guide you. That's okay.

[Damaris]

Amen. Don't get the free world. Don't get your life advice from podcasters.

[Mal]

No, don't do that.

[Damaris]

Us included. Just go get help.

[Mal]

Unless they are qualified to get real help. Yeah, yeah.

[Damaris]

I mean, but that's. Even with the people who. People be like, I see so many people. It's like, yo, this is how you do forex. Or this is how you do social media. This is how you do. And they sell you a course and they're. You see them driving around in a nice car and it's. They didn't get that from getting rich off what they're telling you. They. They got that off you buying their course.

[Mal]

Yeah, I love when you buy the course and they'd be like, yo, but the, the next course, part two, part.

[Rory]

You need part two. Part. Part one was part two.

[Damaris]

This was just 101.

[Rory]

And they'll say things like, I don't want to scam you, so I would advise you to get part two. Because if you do part you. You bought part one, you might as well get part two now.

[Mal]

You have to.

[Rory]

But that, that's that whole like, red pill society. It's just all scammers that they don't. They're worse and don't call themselves doctors. Their version of doctorate is. Is riding in a Lamborghini and doing push ups and being like, change your life. And people buy into it. And that's how they got rich. They didn't get rich from something else. They got rich from doing that. So if you really want to follow their lead, start working out and calling people and then sell your course.

[Mal]

Right, yeah. Great advice for that.

[Damaris]

Yes, Ma. You got beef with the Internet this, this weekend?

[Mal]

I got beef with the Internet.

[Damaris]

I was asking, you got beef with the Internet this weekend?

[Mal]

No. When do I ever have beef with the Internet?

[Damaris]

I don't know. Sometimes the Internet be beefing with you. You might not beef back.

[Mal]

I never. I'm. I'm vegan, bro. I don't beef back. You know that.

[Rory]

That was a bar for my eight mile freestyle.

[Mal]

Yeah, okay. It's a call. It's called a call back.

[Rory]

No, I'm happy. I'm finally getting my flowers for my. For my line.

[Mal]

Them flowers.

[Damaris]

Me and Rory said we go rap Battle. Like how we did the pushing one, but we got to do it, like, in Drake voice.

[Rory]

But we.

[Damaris]

We got to pick which flow. You want R and B flow or you want the time stamp flow.

[Mal]

But to Mar. She acts that so sincerely.

[Rory]

Like.

[Mal]

Like how you want it.

[Rory]

That's why it made me laugh.

[Mal]

She.

[Rory]

She wasn't even joking.

[Mal]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, yo, what you want me to do? You want me to go, right? You want me to go. Honestly, never mind no more. You want me to go Scorpio,

[Damaris]

Y'

[Rory]

all make them cry. Or classic? Like, how you want to.

[Mal]

You want me to pay?

[Damaris]

Make them pay more or make them pay more?

[Rory]

Like, who's out there for me? Like, you want to get in that pocket?

[Mal]

Yo, who's out there for D ass? Oh, my God, Maris is crazy, man.

[Rory]

No, doing a Drake one would be funny. But I'm with you. We got. We have to find a specific flow. R and B, rappy. R and B would be fun. I think that'd be more fun than.

[Damaris]

I would tear your ass up.

[Rory]

You probably would.

[Damaris]

I would tear you up at a time stamp record zoo.

[Rory]

You know, I'm confident in my. I wanted to do another Pusha T1, cuz I'm confident in that. That world. Yeah, I think you. I'll do it, but you'll probably smoke me in the R and B world. That's going to be

[Damaris]

now.

[Rory]

You know what? Yeah, let's stay right there.

[Damaris]

Said keep it right there. Right there.

[Mal]

Yeah, right there, right there, right there, right there, right there, right there.

[Rory]

In the. Like, the. Days in the east flow, I'm getting you. Days in the east flow, I'm smoking you.

[Damaris]

All right, that's fine, but put on a Jada instrumental. I'm a tilt boy. Boy, no.

[Rory]

Somebody was already torn apart on that song. She put out a record on Friday, unfortunately. Yeah, we'll pick one off Mike and figure out. We have to pick a topic, too, though. Yeah, because you ducked me on the. The turtle.

[Damaris]

Yeah, because we did that already, so. But with Drake, you don't really got to pick a topic. You could diss A and your ex in the same song.

[Rory]

Yeah, but I like. I like that we pick something in the news. We'll think on it. Maybe. Maybe they give us suggestions in Discord or Patreon or whatever.

[Damaris]

Yo, until. Oh, yo, everybody with all these. All these. Yo, she back on that side. Stay on that side. Comments. And I'm not gonna hold you like blow dick.

[Mal]

Oh, they was on you.

[Damaris]

That is so cool. It's So I just be sitting up there like, what are y' all doing?

[Mal]

You had to know that was going.

[Damaris]

But it doesn't make any. It doesn't make any sense to, like,

[Mal]

there's nothing on the Internet makes sense. Why are you trying to make something on the Internet make sense? It ain't gonna make sense.

[Rory]

Well, that's why I was confused, cuz I showed Damaris that clip that I posted of her in the car to see if she was okay with me posting it. And she not only was okay, she said, oh, do a collab with me. Yeah, I'm like thinking why I even asked her is because I know, like, those were gonna be the comments, of course. And then she was just going back and forth. Everyone in the comments was like, this is about to happen.

[Damaris]

Shaking ass and cussing everybody out in the comments drunk. And Rory was like, I don't know why you keep responding to these. I'm like, I got time today. I'm sitting here hookah flowing like I'm

[Mal]

comfortable shaking ass to the culture vulture.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but see, don't do. Don't do that. Cuz you further. Don't do that. Don't do that.

[Mal]

I'm just saying.

[Damaris]

But that's not what I said, so don't.

[Mal]

I'm not saying you said you was like, they speaking to his culture vulture ways. That's all.

[Damaris]

Yes, that's all I'm saying.

[Mal]

I didn't say you called him a culture vulture. I'm saying.

[Damaris]

No, but that's. That's. They like, I thought he was a culture vulture, so I didn't say that. Kendrick said it. Why the are y'. All.

[Mal]

No, but you was like, you were saying it like.

[Damaris]

No, I was saying

[Rory]

to him.

[Damaris]

I was yelling to you because you was like, yeah, all he said was this. And it. Because you have a Drake bias. So when I'm talking to you, it's like, that's not what the. That's not the only thing that he said. He didn't just say this. He said this, this, this, this, and this. And that's why I was yelling. It wasn't because I'm passionate about that. I don't give a about neither one of them. They don't pay my bills. But I'm not gonna let you sit up here and say, oh, well, he just said that one little line. No, he said this, this, this, this, and this. And we're not gonna walk past it. But Peach, our greatest clipper of all time, clipped it up the way he did, and it is what it is. But niggas is not about to sit up here and try to like, oh, you back on this side. I have. I have been listening to Drake for longer than y' all have been beating y' all dicks. My nigga been listening to Drake. Never stopped. Never said I would stop. Never said I didn't like Drake's music.

[Mal]

Nah, you gotta stay over there, though. You know that? It is what it is, baby.

[Rory]

Once I saw Boy Wonder like the post, I was like, oh, yeah, it's over.

[Mal]

Gotta stay over there, man, I don't

[Damaris]

give a fuck about none of that shit.

[Mal]

You gotta stay over there.

[Rory]

Don't give a fuck about Boy Wonder.

[Damaris]

I don't know that. Shout out to him. I mean, that's what's up. You're a great producer. I don't know him.

[Mal]

That's my guy. That's my. Right there.

[Damaris]

That's what's up.

[Mal]

Yeah, but you gotta stay over there. It's all good, though.

[Damaris]

Wait, but what side am I? Cause Kendrick and them fans kick me off for saying I don't like Kendrick, so I can't be biased against Drake.

[Mal]

But Cole, you. You at Dreamville. You have.

[Damaris]

So Drake and Cole have beef. Cause when that was happening, when I was yelling. When I was yelling at you. Wait, hold on. When I was yelling at you? When y' all was telling me. Y' all was telling me to stay on that side. Cole and Drake was still on the same side. So what side am I on? What side I gotta stay on?

[Mal]

2014 Forest Hills Drive.

[Damaris]

Always outlit there. I got a bedroom.

[Mal]

There you go. That's what I'm saying. Stand on it.

[Rory]

I'm the lonely one. Ovo, tde, PG Lang and Dream, though, all the fans have kicked me up.

[Mal]

No, you know what?

[Damaris]

That's called objectivity. It's called objectivity.

[Rory]

I'm just hoping, like, Don Tolliver's crew will take me in.

[Damaris]

What's Don Toliver's crew name? Ryan. Look that up.

[Rory]

Yeah, even some of the cactus guys don't like me, so. Yeah. Damn, cuz. I said one thing bad about Travis Scott. Out of the thousand amazing things I've said about him.

[Damaris]

You a whole avenger. That's all. That's all that's left.

[Rory]

Kick me out.

[Damaris]

They kicked you out of there, too? God damn.

[Mal]

Damn, man.

[Rory]

Yeah, maybe I gotta go join mmg.

[Damaris]

They took all your flags just walking around. A white T shirt.

[Mal]

Damn, man.

[Damaris]

That's crazy.

[Rory]

No, I'm get one of these young kids, like Lucky or someone yeah, I'm go. I'll be the old man in the club.

[Damaris]

And that's L U C K I Not because you gotta some people.

[Rory]

No, no, not Lucky. Lucky the rapper. So I still have to listen to his album. I was just listening to Drake for the weekend.

[Damaris]

We're gonna be looking into Drake for the next three weekends. That's mad music.

[Rory]

Yeah, it definitely is. The only other thing I actually watched over the weekend was Jason Lee on Ricky Lake.

[Mal]

Oh, you saw that viral clip. That's your first time seeing it?

[Rory]

Yeah. And, I mean, we've always said kind things about Jason Lee, but I wouldn't say that. Like, I. I pay attention to everything going on in Jason Lee's world. So, no, I didn't see that. That might be better than Game on, that Heartbreak show that's up there.

[Mal]

I just like watching, like, the old, like, talk shows and how they used to do things. Like they had Jason Lee acting like he was calling a bunch of girls off the house phone, like the landline.

[Rory]

That was the funniest part.

[Mal]

Oh, my God.

[Rory]

Yo, I need you to get here Sunday.

[Mal]

Yo, that is hilarious, man. That was real tv.

[Damaris]

So the first thing I thought when I saw this is, God damn. Jason Lee was fine. That was one. He was real fine. That's a straight man. That was first thing. I don't know if y' all thought that, but that's what I thought.

[Rory]

I didn't cross my mind.

[Damaris]

And then he called the alleged friend of his alleged girlfriend. Cuz all of this is obviously somewhat staged. Called her a. And then called Shorty in the audience a. And we love Jason Lee. He's a friend of the show. But the first thing I thought was, see, when we tell y' all that niggas that be violating women are gay, y' all think we making this shit up. That's the first thing I thought about this.

[Rory]

There's. There's straight men that violate women, but. No, I. I hear you. I get it. Because you. You could hear some of the gayness coming out every now and then now that we know he's gay. And you listen back to that, you catch the gay tendency.

[Damaris]

He sound like.

[Rory]

And they're usually when it's disrespect and when it's.

[Damaris]

He said he sound like these. On the Internet, you don't like women.

[Rory]

Oh, I agree there.

[Damaris]

If you liked women, there's no way you could treat women like that.

[Rory]

Yeah, a lot of guys on the Internet hate Meg so much because they just hate women in general or they

[Damaris]

want to be women.

[Rory]

But he started talking about her hair.

[Damaris]

And Jason, this is old. Like, this is no disrespect to you. He's never talking about her hair. Like, you could do it better, like, if I. You know what I'm saying? Like, you still weird.

[Rory]

That's feeling his. His mutton chops.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Those was crazy.

[Rory]

It was the times.

[Damaris]

Those was crazy. But shout out to him. He's created. You know, I'm happy he's living in his truth and become a much better person from what this seems. Cause this was. That was crazy.

[Rory]

Well, did you see him on Breakfast Club again right after this went viral again?

[Damaris]

No.

[Rory]

He was saying that he was trying to obviously front as a straight person and did have those girlfriends that wasn't staged. But he said the boyfriend of one of them he met and then they started. They. The day of this show in the hotel. No, it was a crazy interview.

[Mal]

Wait, what?

[Rory]

So one of the other chicks had a boyfriend, and they, like, all knew each other.

[Mal]

Okay.

[Rory]

He was also the boyfriend because they were both on the door. He said they. That night, him and the dude.

[Mal]

All right, okay. Thoroughbred, man.

[Rory]

Anybody could get.

[Mal]

Anybody can get it.

[Rory]

Anyone on this panel could.

[Mal]

Jason Lee was over anybody.

[Damaris]

I think it said dick everywhere. Equal opportunity dick.

[Mal]

Yeah, I love that.

[Rory]

But I mean, you know, this is gonna pop up because he's running something political in his hometown, I believe. Right.

[Mal]

I think he won.

[Rory]

Or he did win.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

My apologies for. Not again. I don't keep up with. With everything, I think. But yeah, now, once. Once. But Jason Lee is a tough person to go against politically because there's not really anything Jason Lee hasn't talked about. Like, if you say something about Jason, he's gonna say, okay, so what? Like, it won't be, like, detrimental to his reputation.

[Mal]

Right.

[Damaris]

He's the vice mayor and District 6 City Council member in Stockton, California. So he's a council member and a vice mayor.

[Mal]

Oh, give him shout out to Jason Lee, man.

[Rory]

But no, that's. That's funny. Where do you rank it against the game changer?

[Mal]

Nah, Jason Lee, if he had sex with Shorty's a boyfriend that was on the panel. He. Oh, he the legend.

[Rory]

Yeah, man.

[Mal]

He the legend of legends.

[Rory]

And unfortunately, she had a change of heart for Game that day.

[Damaris]

Day.

[Rory]

He lost the show. Jason Lee won the show.

[Mal]

He won the show. He definitely won the show. He. Everybody on the panel.

[Damaris]

But what show y' all think y' all would have been on? Like, if back in the day, we were old enough like, you know what I'm saying? And we were getting into that type of.

[Mal]

I was old enough to go on Ricky Lake, but I just wasn't in the suburbs claiming to be a blood. Oh, my story wasn't like, if I just said, I'm a blood from Harlem, made him lane of 10,000 of y'.

[Damaris]

All.

[Rory]

Get in line.

[Mal]

Yeah, get in line. But if I'm living in the suburbs and it's like, oh, we gotta get him on the show, like, he's terrorizing the neighborhood in the suburbs, like. No, but I was old enough because. What was that? 95.

[Damaris]

Jesus.

[Mal]

96. Ricky Lake, maybe. Because that was. I don't know what year that was that Jason Lee was on there. But, yeah, Jason Lee's a little older than me, so, yeah, I could. I could have.

[Damaris]

Jason Lee is 48 years old. First of all, you look good, Jason.

[Rory]

He's 48.

[Damaris]

Good. 48.

[Rory]

Oh, he looked great for 48.

[Damaris]

He looks amazing. That was 94. Oh, my God.

[Mal]

I mean, I was young. I was 13.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

I wasn't born. I was born a year.

[Rory]

I think being on Scared Straight in retrospect would be funny. Probably not at the moment.

[Damaris]

Oh, they definitely should have scared your ass straight.

[Rory]

But I don't. I wouldn't have been on a regular. I probably would have been on a Dr. Phil of, like, just to an angry little Irish boy, like, we need to get through to you. But Scared Straight maybe would have helped Rory on. I would have been scared. These young kids now, I don't think would be scared of Scared Straight at all. They'd probably try to sneak a extendo in there. I'd be petrified. On Scared Straight, they had called you

[Damaris]

a pretty little redhead and stroke the side of your face and ask you if the curtain matched the drapes. Your ass would have straightened up so quick.

[Rory]

I would never. I would never commit a crime again. No illegal parking, no speeding.

[Mal]

He went home and did homework. Remember, you got in trouble, first thing you do.

[Rory]

I'd be Dr. Roy.

[Mal]

No, yo, Roy went home and did. Went straight to his homework, bro.

[Rory]

Scared Straight. That there was even ones that they had to, like, take off the. The Internet because they were so intense that, like, this day and age, it looks like child abuse things.

[Mal]

Yeah. These young dudes, they don't care about jail. Jail?

[Rory]

Not at all.

[Mal]

They want to go.

[Rory]

But, I mean, if you're asking, all those shows, I would have had, like, five baby mothers or, like, not sure if my kid is mine. I wouldn't have wanted been on any of those shows, there's no, like, good. No, I'm saying all like, the. The daytime.

[Mal]

Oh, Ricky Lake.

[Rory]

Yeah. Because either way, it's the kids. Either not yours or the girl's not yours. No one really wins in any.

[Damaris]

I definitely would have been the homegirl. Like, I'm telling you, he's cheating on you and Ricky. Be like, we're gonna bring out the proof that have been me. I'd have been the hating ass homegirl for sure. That cheating on you.

[Mal]

Yeah, that's how I usually go. But you don't want cheating. Yeah, because when you gonna do a Ricky, bring out the homeboy that you've been texting out from the back. You know she was good for that. Well, we have Daryl here and he seems to have a word to say.

[Damaris]

Yo, mouth just dropped.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Nah, I would have been on like Judge Judy or some like that. But that one.

[Mal]

Who you suing?

[Damaris]

I don't know. Suing a for wasting my time.

[Mal]

I could definitely see Damaris taking the to court for wasting my time.

[Damaris]

Taking.

[Rory]

Wasting my Judge Judy cursing you out for wasting her time.

[Mal]

Exactly.

[Damaris]

Now I don't want. I take it to Joe Brown. I'm going to Joe Brown and Batmobile.

[Rory]

You might have a better shot there.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I take it to Judge Joe Brown.

[Rory]

What will be your case, though? Like, how would you even pitch that one?

[Mal]

One?

[Rory]

Like, what. What's the damages versus the time ratio?

[Damaris]

I was investing money into living in a certain place, doing certain things. All of this because you told me that we would get married and have a family. So I went to IV. I went to IVF. I invested money in that. I'm in my 30s. I wasted time. Now I can't have kids. And you decided you don't want me. You wasted my time. All I got to do is prove that you have been wasting my time the whole time. So all I gotta do is have evidence that when you were telling me that you were planning this future with me, that you actually did not mean that. And you were leading me to falsely believe things.

[Rory]

Got you. Your honor. I told you this bitch was crazy, right?

[Mal]

Can men take women to court for, like, if they don't look to. All right, never mind.

[Damaris]

Thank you. I knew you was about to go somewhere dark with it. I just.

[Mal]

They don't ever want me to get my shit over.

[Damaris]

And they be getting so mad at me. Like, why she always stopping, Ma? Because I like having a job. I want to continue to have a job. I want us to continue to have

[Mal]

sponsors I'm just saying the women could do that. We should be able to take them to court for like, you know, she don't. You don't really look like that though. Like if you wash your face like you wash that makeup off and it ain't that. Can I get my money back from the date, Ma?

[Damaris]

You can tell what people really look like through makeup?

[Mal]

Shit. Hell, not all the time.

[Damaris]

What feature can. What feature that will make a woman ugly? Can you not tell through makeup?

[Mal]

Look, that nose don't be like the contour game is crazy. Crazy. The contour, like when they make it look like the. Like the nose is like symmetric. You know what I mean? Like right there. When that makeup come off, that should be like right here.

[Damaris]

That's anti black mall.

[Mal]

No, it's not. Why you go right to that.

[Damaris]

It's not just black people that have big.

[Mal]

No, it's not. So you don't do that. You making it that. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying sometimes that makeup, it changes your face.

[Damaris]

But if you.

[Mal]

I'm speaking from a victim.

[Damaris]

Oh, you're a victim.

[Mal]

I've been a victim.

[Damaris]

If you're sitting in somebody's face though mall, you can see like makeup pictures. Yes. Right. Because if you take a picture and you have a face full of makeup, it can kind of alter. It can hide things. That's the whole purpose of contouring. But if you sit in, like I have my nose contour right now. If you're sitting in my face, you can still see the shape of my nose. Like the texture in 3D through the makeup.

[Mal]

Now imagine if you was to wipe all of that off.

[Damaris]

Off.

[Mal]

No brows. Skin is just not, you know, glowing like that. Dry a little bit. Like you not hydrated really.

[Damaris]

But you can also see that through makeup. Makeup be patchy and ashy when women dry.

[Mal]

We met online. So it's pictures first.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mal]

Videos first. And then we get on a date.

[Damaris]

Because you don't take her on the daytime, only nighttime, harsh lighting.

[Mal]

But she works. So she can only. She can only do dinner at like 7:30, 8 o'. Clock. Right. It's not my fault.

[Damaris]

So.

[Mal]

Okay, can we go to dinner? Say we hit it off back at her place. Cool. Wake up in the morning, spend the night. Not saying we had sex, but, you know, just I ended up staying over. Whatever. Cool. Or my place. You come to my place, you end up staying over with no sex. No, I mean just chill, fall asleep. You gotta get comfortable side. Morning come. How you Getting who. Who let you in?

[Rory]

So. So you're adding up Uber receipts?

[Mal]

Yeah, like, I'm just saying, like, who lets you win?

[Rory]

It's funny. Yeah.

[Mal]

This is not the moment I laid down and went to sleep in my crib.

[Rory]

I'm just saying, I asked myself, who is this?

[Mal]

Yeah, who is this person? Who are you?

[Damaris]

Has that happened to you often? Because I feel like most women, you can tell if they're ugly. Like, there's some celebrities that we know and we see them in makeup. Like, it's like, I know you ugly up underneath that makeup. You can still tell you've really been tricked before.

[Rory]

I've been catfish.

[Mal]

Like, I've been tricked before, but not like it.

[Rory]

She.

[Mal]

Yeah, she didn't look nothing. Like, the makeup was a big difference, but she wasn't ugly, though. The makeup did make a big difference, though, but she wasn't an ugly girl.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's definitely happened, but I haven't been, like, flat out catfish. Like, show up to the spot and you a different person. Like, or you just did the shoulder up and. Yeah, that's never happened to me, but. But I've definitely been a victim of. Oh, you're great at taking photos. You're really good at angles, you know, your lighting.

[Damaris]

I've been a victim of that.

[Rory]

Like, you. Yeah, you. You don't look like that in person at all.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Outside of just the makeup one. Like, you just don't even look like that.

[Mal]

So.

[Rory]

I've been there, but at that point, you know, charge the game.

[Mal]

You still going to beat.

[Damaris]

Still going to beat. Raw.

[Mal]

Talking about in it.

[Damaris]

Talking about in it.

[Mal]

Do we have voicemails?

[Damaris]

We don't.

[Rory]

Not today. But the Cavs have beat the Pistons.

[Mal]

All right, baby D, your team still holding on?

[Damaris]

Let's go.

[Mal]

Minnesota went home. Minnesota went home. But Cavs, your Cavs are going to the Eastern Conference finals, so salute to the Cavs.

[Rory]

And then spurs and okc. I'm nervous, man, because I wanted to play the Cavs. No, no disrespect to James Harden. He just doesn't show off and show up in the playoffs typically.

[Mal]

So I would even play.

[Rory]

I know. That's what's. That's what scares me. It would be the Knicks luck that this was the year that James Harden shows up.

[Mal]

Listen, man, this is all that has to happen. Pagola, do what y' all do best.

[Damaris]

Yo, I'm screaming.

[Rory]

Oh, my God. I didn't even put that in perspective.

[Mal]

Yeah, Pagola.

[Rory]

James has to come to New York.

[Mal]

All Right, Pagola. Do what you do best.

[Rory]

Wait, James has to come to New York with a new Drake album? Oh, yeah.

[Damaris]

Oh, it's over.

[Rory]

No, we winning.

[Damaris]

N. I got you. I got you. I got you.

[Mal]

Who we got you, Perola. Do what y' all do best.

[Damaris]

I'm about to call Major and Mitch, like, line that nigga, bro. Get him drunk.

[Mal]

Pack that hookah with a little something extra. That's gonna have him a little woozy, little drowsy for the game, man. Have him seeing three hoops out there.

[Rory]

What's. What's that movie where they kidnap. It was one of the Wayans brothers that played for the Celtics.

[Mal]

Oh, yeah, that was.

[Rory]

Oh, that movie was great. We're showing our age. Celtic pride. Celtic.

[Mal]

There you go.

[Rory]

Peach. You know how easy they could do that with James Harden? Just with two chicks from starless.

[Mal]

Oh, man.

[Rory]

Like, you don't even. You don't even kidnap them, do anything. Yeah, and he's not even showing up.

[Mal]

It's gonna be a good series, though.

[Rory]

But no, I'm very proud of my Knicks. I'm a very nervous Knicks fan because everything is going on.

[Mal]

Great shout out to the Knicks, man.

[Rory]

Everything's going good. Everything's looking in our favor, and I've never seen that before, so it makes me nervous. Makes me very, like, oh, gee, got the proper rest. I'm terrified. Everything going the way it's going.

[Mal]

This is going to be a good. It's going to be a good conference finals on both. On both ends. Spurs and okc, obviously, they went back and forth all year. Obviously, the Spurs, I think, won the season series, but it's probably the two best teams in the west that you know are in the Western Conference finals.

[Rory]

Yeah, I did not see the Cavs getting to the Eastern Conference finals at all, so. The rest of them as well. But if the Knicks have played like they did last round against Philly, then I think we'll be okay.

[Mal]

Yeah, man. It's going to be an exciting time in New York. The energy summer, you know what I'm saying?

[Rory]

I was looking up tickets.

[Mal]

I hear it already. I hear the ass clapping in the sundress. I hear it.

[Rory]

Just do it in front of James.

[Damaris]

Do it in front of James. Throw him off his pivot.

[Rory]

I was looking up tickets. If the Knicks make it to the finals. Not Eastern Conference, just if they make it to the finals. Damn. Was like some of them were, like, 100 grand.

[Mal]

Oh, yeah, That's a regular ticket during the season. Sometimes.

[Rory]

It's crazy.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

But, I mean, I would love to go to some of these Eastern Conference finals games. But even last round on my birthday, I was looking up tickets, and she was, like, four grand. Like, I watch it.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Like, I'm. I'm. Of course I want to be in the building and feel that energy, but I. I think I'll just watch.

[Mal]

Are they bringing the towels out? They bring the towels out for the Easter Conference final?

[Rory]

I would hope so.

[Mal]

You got to bring the towels out, man.

[Rory]

I would hope so. But if. If the Knicks. This is how my, like, adult brain works now. If the Knicks make the finals and FIFA starts, this city is going to be a nightmare.

[Mal]

Oh, yeah.

[Rory]

Like. Like, we may need to do the POD from Zoom. Yeah, I don't think we'll be able to move around at all.

[Mal]

Like, way too much going on.

[Rory]

There's gonna be so much traffic if they make it. But I'm. I'm excited for them. So shout out to all my real Nick fans that have been holding us down for this long.

[Mal]

Yes, sir.

[Rory]

Sure. A lot of heartbreak, but maybe this. This could be our year.

[Mal]

What happened, P. Just see that look in y'.

[Rory]

All.

[Mal]

He got that twinkling. Yeah, Like, real. The B.

[Rory]

You guys can keep up. That's really where you guys thought I was going.

[Damaris]

When you got a white friend. White friend.

[Rory]

When you got a white.

[Damaris]

You always just, like, you kind of waiting for. For them to say, like, you just kind of waiting, like. I know you don't say it.

[Mal]

Knicks.

[Rory]

The Knicks.

[Mal]

Knicks. Not the.

[Rory]

I don't even want to say the full Knicks name because it scares him. The New York Knicks.

[Mal]

The New York Knickerbockers Mall.

[Damaris]

Let me tell you about Rory. Awkward ass.

[Mal]

Let me tell you about my brother, though.

[Rory]

Good Drake song.

[Damaris]

That was good. Yeah, he. We at the table. Told you we went to baddies. He gonna look at the baddies like, yo, so did Maris ever try to, like, one of y' all swag?

[Mal]

That's Rory. I'm like, he always asks the inappropriate question. He always want to know who you. And then be lying about who he.

[Rory]

I'm not anyone.

[Mal]

I know. I know. Iceman in stores now, but that's just a you thing.

[Rory]

Damaris and I, if. If we are actively sleeping with somebody, we know who the other person is.

[Damaris]

You don't have no idea who I'm actively sleeping with. Oh.

[Rory]

Iceman in stores.

[Mal]

Iceman in stores now. A BT in stores now. Made of Honor in stores now. Lucky Drugs Are Bad album out now. Tone Stiff the Edge album out Now G. Stiff man.

[Rory]

Yeah, I. With tone.

[Mal]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Giveon beloved Act 2 is coming out or that's out.

[Rory]

It's out. I need it came out on Friday. I just didn't have time to give you. I'm definitely going to listen to that.

[Mal]

That.

[Rory]

But don't. Don't even try to angle that. Like it would scare the hoes time. They were into the question.

[Damaris]

They were into the question.

[Rory]

It was good conversation at the table. Like it didn't scare the hoes. It. It, it was sometimes fun.

[Damaris]

They just giggled. Giggled awkwardly cuz I did. But like they just gig.

[Rory]

Giggle.

[Daniel Cormier (Ad)]

Awkward.

[Damaris]

But like you ain't got to bring that up.

[Rory]

No, I don't. I agree with you.

[Mal]

Like I.

[Rory]

They were both beautiful.

[Mal]

I didn't think you did anything wrong.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I know my home girl. So I did when I met them, I was trying to beat but then I was like, oh no. Y' all like actually cool. So like so they're my friend.

[Rory]

So women also can't be platonic friends too, huh? We can't be turned.

[Damaris]

We are platonic friends because unlike, you know, men, I saw that these women had crazy value as friends. I was like, I would never want to that up. So they are my dogs.

[Mal]

Got it. Shout out to Nick Grant. Smile available now.

[Rory]

Yes. Shout out to Nick.

[Damaris]

Shout out to them.

[Rory]

Absolutely.

[Damaris]

Nick gotta come back to New York and visit us.

[Mal]

He coming back? He'll be back.

[Rory]

Is he doing a tour for this project?

[Mal]

I'm not sure yet.

[Rory]

Yeah, I gotta live with that one as well. We definitely need to give a proper Nick Grant review for the album. But yeah, I want to see. I saw Nick perform live once when we went to Marlon's residency. But I want to see a full Nick show.

[Mal]

No, Nick put on a good show.

[Rory]

Yeah, absolutely. All right, well we will see you a couple times this week. Patreon is available patreon.com/new royal Mall.

[Mal]

Yes sir.

[Damaris]

March is there International is available now. We need to put that at the top of that.

[Rory]

So we will be back very soon. Thank you to everyone that listened this far into the episode.

[Damaris]

If you want to see me twerking to Iceman, go to our Patreon. Our live stream is available now for the 20 and up tier twerking the Iceman. Well, technically to made honor, but yeah,

[Mal]

turking a maid on. All right. Twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk something. All right, we'll talk to y' all soon. Be safe, be blessed. I'm the nigga. He's just Ginger Peace.

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[Damaris]

Okay, laundry stinks. Literally. I mean, you could just keep buying new underwear. Not that I've ever done that. Or maybe sort your clothes into piles based on how replaced, wearable or filthy they are. Or just use Arm and Hammer Deep Clean. It's made for real life stinks and stains. So even if you don't do laundry, the quote right way Deep Clean will knock it out. I mean, it is from the number one liquid detergent brand that tackles more loads than any other. Come clean with Arm and Hammer Deep Clean Number one claim based on Total Wash loads sold.

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[Rory]

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[Damaris]

Yep, you needed that.

[Rory]

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[Damaris]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.