Episode 500 | Rapplebee's

Summary

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New Rory & MAL – Episode 500: "Rapplebee's"

Release Date: May 29, 2026
Hosts: Rory, Mal, and Damaris
Podcast: iHeartPodcasts and The Volume

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Overview

The 500th episode of New Rory & MAL, titled "Rapplebee's," delivers a highly engaging, off-the-cuff session full of playful banter, music and festival talk, relationship debates, and signature unfiltered takes on cultural happenings. The trio spend most of the episode trading personal anecdotes, breaking down hip-hop news (including Drake breaking a Michael Jackson chart record), discussing the NYC energy around the Knicks reaching the NBA finals, and debating food chains like Chili’s versus Applebee’s. The episode also includes listener voicemails, including a light-hearted but insightful Wale vs. Big Sean Versus battle fantasy.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Foot Charts, Pride & Ego, and Setting the Vibe

Timestamps: 03:07 – 08:44

• The crew riffs on Damaris’s choice of shoes and the concept of the “toe chart,” comparing different foot shapes by nationalities and what shoes suit them.
  • "You got African feet there you go." – Rory (05:34)
  • "People with Egyptian feet scare me." – Damaris (04:55)
• They reflect on their own egos and pride, teasing each other’s personalities.
  • "I have the most pride. Yeah, I think so." – Rory (07:10)
  • "My ego's disgusting." – Damaris (07:01)

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2. Roots Picnic Plans and Festival Guest Lists

Timestamps: 07:49 – 13:32

• Mal previews his plans for Roots Picnic, discussing the possibility of state property and which Philly stars (Beanie Sigel, Freeway, Eve, etc.) might show up.
  • "I assume Oscino is not going to be on it… I just don’t think he will be invited." – Mall (08:31)
  • "Eve is filthy rich. Wants nothing to do with hip-hop." – Rory (09:00)
• Damaris retells a story about being left off a concert’s guest list and the awkwardness of “Will call” situations.
  • "That's always awkward when you get to Will call and you think you're on the list and you're not." – Mall (11:24)
  • "No, I'm literally, no one's coming with me to Philly." – Mall (12:41)

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3. Global Entry, Real ID, and Airport Anxieties

Timestamps: 15:34 – 17:20

• Rory raves about his first experience using Global Entry to skip airport lines, and they all commiserate about real IDs and bureaucracy:
  • "It's going to go all digital." – Rory (16:39)
  • "Waste the money, bro." – Damaris (17:20)

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4. Crashing Dates & Dating Dynamics

Timestamps: 17:21 – 24:38

• The crew dives into crashing friends' dates, double dates, and the “platonic double date” concept, with Rory joking about causing jealousy and the dangers of setting up friends romantically:
  • "What if we do that? Right? …I'm making everybody laugh… her friend is there with homie getting rhythm… I'm talking my shit… what if she starts having more conversation with me than her date?" – Rory (18:12)
  • "I've never failed, baby." – Damaris (19:44)
  • "But you don't deserve an ain't shit nigga though." – Rory (19:54)

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5. On Passes, Friends, and Relationship Boundaries

Timestamps: 24:39 – 29:02

• The group explores the awkwardness of introducing friends, blocking would-be setups, and the importance of protecting friends’ interests.
  • "I know my dirtbag friends." – Mall (22:22)
  • "I'm not suggesting that at all. I don't know what they got going on with they coochies, but I'm just saying, you never know. It's 2026." – Damaris (24:29)

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6. The Breakfast Club's Netflix Deal & The Fear of Going Live

Timestamps: 29:42 – 32:03

• Discussion around The Breakfast Club's move to stream live on Netflix, with reflections on whether Rory & MAL could go live without getting canceled.
  • "We can’t be live… it’d be grand opening, grand closing." – Rory (25:01)
  • "Once I know it's live, I could censor myself. Really?" – Rory (26:37)

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7. Dame Dash vs. Jason Lee, and Vlad’s $15 Million Offer

Timestamps: 33:32 – 44:03

• Mal and Rory recap a wild Jason Lee x Dame Dash interview, highlighting Dame’s inability to understand Lee’s sexuality, and then pivot to Vlad TV’s bizarre comments about selling his “anal virginity” for $15M.
  • "Dame literally sits there… and tries to understand why Jason Lee sucks dick." – Mall (34:01)
  • "That's not even blood money. That's butt money." – Mall (38:33)
  • On Vlad: "Even if I was poor, I’m not letting a man penetrate me with his dick into my ass." – Mall (44:44)

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8. Sex, OnlyFans, and the Value of Virginity

Timestamps: 39:33 – 45:05

• Extended, comedic but real debate regarding an OnlyFans star supposedly turning down $15M to lose her virginity, gender and social perspectives on the “value of virginity.”
  • "Not worth more than 15 million, I tell you that." – Rory (42:58)
  • "People who just want to have sex with people for their virgin because they're virgins are sick people." – Damaris (43:45)

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9. Drake Breaks a Michael Jackson Billboard Record & Thoughts on Features

Timestamps: 45:13 – 48:33

• The hosts react to Drake breaking MJ’s No.1 record, but note how collaborations and features make comparisons tricky.
  • "Drake comes from the generation where A-listers collaborate. Like, that’s the era of music now." – Mall (47:20)

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10. Chili’s vs. Applebee’s & the Rapplebee’s Origin

Timestamps: 48:34 – 51:53

• Lizzo’s new partnership with Chili’s has the crew ranking casual chain restaurants and joking about the Applebee’s “Don Pulio” pool-sized margarita, and coining “Rapplebee’s.”
  • "Chili’s definitely has better food than Applebee(s)." – Rory (49:38)
  • "Applebee’s food sucks. …If you’re gonna feed me some dog, feed me hot dog. Don’t feed me mid, lukewarm dog." – Damaris (49:54)

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11. Knicks in the NBA Finals & New York City Energy

Timestamps: 52:12 – 59:06

• Deep dive into the Knicks’ finals run, where to watch games, the possibility of a championship parade, and what this means for NYC culture.
  • "Listen, now that it's finally here, I'm not gonna lie… the Knicks are in the finals. We may not ever see this again." – Rory (54:45)
  • "New Yorkers are crying." – Rory (58:08)
  • "That New York energy is back, man. The Knicks is up. It's a good energy in New York." – Damaris (58:55)

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12. Listener Voicemails – Wale vs. Big Sean, and Ghosting in Dating

Timestamps: 64:45 – 86:13

• Voicemail 1: Which artist wins a Versus, Wale or Big Sean?
  • “I feel like Wale's hits ring off a little bit harder…” (Caller, 66:14)
  • Hosts mostly side with Wale, especially when considering R&B hit records aimed at women.
    • "When you have a song that people can get married to, that's a win in Versus." – Mall (70:25)
• Voicemail 2: Caller describes frustrations with a girl who ghosts while out partying.
  • "If a girl goes out and she's drunk and she doesn't text you, she's texting somebody else." – Mall (74:48)
  • "If you've complained about it and she hasn't changed it, she don't respect you." – Damaris (76:39)
  • Extended, hilarious back-and-forth on the rules and hypocrisies of modern dating.

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13. New Music Releases & Closing Remarks

Timestamps: 87:00 – 91:23

• Shout-outs to music releases from Rory, Lotto, Mariah the Scientist, Anderson .Paak, 38 Spesh, Cherry, Freddie Gibbs, and others.
• Quick preview of their complex 50 Greatest NYC Rappers discussion on Patreon.
  • "On Patreon right now you can hear our breakdown of The Complex Top 50 New York City rappers…" – Mall (91:23)

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Notable / Memorable Quotes (with Timestamps)

• “You got African feet there you go.” — Rory (05:34)
• “My ego's disgusting.” — Damaris (07:01)
• “That's always awkward when you get to Will call and you think you're on the list and you're not.” — Mall (11:24)
• “That's not even blood money. That's butt money.” — Mall (38:33)
• “If a girl goes out and she's drunk and she doesn't text you, she's texting somebody else.” — Mall (74:48)
• “That New York energy is back, man. The Knicks is up. It's a good energy in New York.” — Damaris (58:55)
• “When you have a song that people can get married to, that's a win in Versus.” — Mall (70:25)

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Memorable Moments

• The "Rapplebee's" running joke about Applebee’s and Chili’s rivalry, and the invention of the drink “Don Pulio.”
• The heated but playful debate about what it would cost for a man to sell his “anal virginity” for $15 million.
• The "Wale vs Big Sean" Versus discussion, breaking down R&B hits vs. white-people anthems.
• Emotional anticipation for a Knicks championship and how NYC would respond.
• Candid breakdown of relationship double standards and modern dating “apply pressure” memes.

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Episode Flow & Tone

The episode is classic Rory & MAL — irreverent, self-effacing, sharp (sometimes wild) in their references, deeply New York, culturally current, while weaving in personal vulnerability and community. Language is playful but real, jumping from jokes and loud laughter to honest life and music insights. The banter is quick-fire, making it always engaging for both regular fans and curious newcomers.

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Suggested Essential Listening Segments

• Roots Picnic & Festival Stories: 07:49 – 13:32
• Relationship/Ego Talk: 17:21 – 24:38 & 76:31 – 86:13
• Dame Dash x Jason Lee Recap & Vlad Sexuality Debate: 33:32 – 44:03
• Wale vs Big Sean Versus Fantasy: 64:45 – 72:55
• Knicks in the Finals / New York Energy: 52:12 – 59:06
• Food Chains & Rapplebee’s Riff: 48:34 – 51:53

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Final Thoughts

Episode 500 is a celebratory, chemistry-rich ride from the trio, exploring everything from the mundane (feet and chain restaurants) to the most intimate taboos and headline music news. The episode reads like a love letter to New York, music, and the evolving chaos of modern adulthood — with the kind of hilarity and honesty only New Rory & MAL can deliver.

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Transcript

[Damaris]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.

[Kalpen (Cal Penn)]

Hey, everyone, it's Kalpen. I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Hearsay, The Audible, and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Irsay, the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Ray Porter]

What's up, y'?

[Rory]

All?

[Ray Porter]

Summer's got a different tempo. Everything's a little looser, brighter. One plan turns into another. You hear something, you stay a little longer. Next thing you know, you're somewhere you didn't plan to be. It's those in between moments. That's where the ideas hit. Conversations stretch out. Little memories sneak up on you. Sometimes it's just about what's in your hand. That color, that chill. The new Tropical Butterfly Refresher from Starbucks. Guava and passion fruit flavors with mango pineapple flavored pearls. Yeah, that feels like summer before you even taste it. Funny how one small stop becomes the best part of the day. Start your summer rhythm with Starbucks. Try the new Tropical Butterfly Refresher from Starbucks.

[Reese Witherspoon (advertisement)]

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[Mall]

Visit Wells Fargo.com autographjourney.

[Kalpen (Cal Penn)]

Terms apply.

[Mall]

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[Damaris]

No worry enough. Yeah.

[Rory]

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Welcome back to another.

[Mall]

Just cuz he was the only one not clapping.

[Rory]

Oh, my bad eyes. Thank y'. All. Appreciate that, man. Welcome back to Another episode.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Of the new Rory and Mall podcast. I am sipping my tea. Baby D has made a special licks over there.

[Mall]

She's got the toes out.

[Rory]

Friday. Friday.

[Mall]

This is what everyone misses.

[Rory]

When she know that. Yeah.

[Mall]

No, I didn't know. I didn't get petty.

[Damaris]

Friday had them patent leather funeral shoes on.

[Mall]

I had to.

[Rory]

You had the what?

[Damaris]

Them patent leather funeral.

[Rory]

You had them Patty labelles on.

[Mall]

She had the grease on.

[Damaris]

You know them. I have more than one. That is for people with one toe. Yo, I had to take them shits off.

[Rory]

You got to look at your toe chart, baby. Then they show you exactly which shoes not supposed to wear.

[Damaris]

What taught you that?

[Rory]

No, it's a tow tr. If your toes are like. They have like the Greek feet, the Roman feet. You never saw that. Pull it up, Ryan. They have it. It's the.

[Mall]

If you're a lot of hoes, man.

[Rory]

Yeah. If your feet are shaped a certain way to me. Yeah. If your feet is. Yeah.

[Mall]

See which is your favorite. What's a big red flag for you? I know you have a theory about this. There's no way you don't.

[Rory]

The Celtic toe and the Greek toe is crazy. The second long toe is wild. The second long toe is crazy.

[Mall]

That's pretty common, though.

[Damaris]

Whatever one is the second, second one. First run of the second first one or the second row is whatever is the one I have.

[Mall]

Africa.

[Damaris]

No, before African. Yeah, Orient. Yeah, I have my. My toes go straight across.

[Rory]

That's what you see.

[Damaris]

They're almost all the same length.

[Rory]

No, you like this, baby D, you got African feet.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Rory]

You're not straight across. Oh, your pinky toe ain't the same length as your big toe.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Now you more African. You from Africa, girl.

[Damaris]

Oh, that is Africa. Kind of. Yeah. I am African.

[Mall]

Ironically, out of this foot chart, African would be the closest that I would have to.

[Rory]

There you go.

[Mall]

See where we all originated.

[Rory]

Yeah, I'm Africa.

[Damaris]

People with Egyptian feet scare me.

[Mall]

Which one is that?

[Damaris]

The one with the big toe.

[Mall]

Oh, yes.

[Rory]

They just staircase.

[Damaris]

Yeah. I don't like staircase toes.

[Mall]

Yeah, they might be good at soccer, though.

[Rory]

German feet is crazy. The big toe and all the rest

[Mall]

of the

[Rory]

German feet is crazy.

[Mall]

But the German foot in your mouth?

[Rory]

Nah. Hell no. But then you. You. They have this baby DNA sh. The other one where they show you which type of shoes you. You should not be wearing.

[Damaris]

Okay, I'm going have to check that out.

[Rory]

Yeah, those right there. That mean for you? No, that mean African European shoes right there. You got to Go to Africa.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

You know what I'm saying?

[Damaris]

Whenever I buy European shoes, I have to buy like 2 sizes up cuz they make like tiny ass.

[Rory]

You got African feet there you go.

[Mall]

See Long Island. Steve Madden.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Come on now.

[Mall]

Can't do that. I think so

[Damaris]

Long island on people.

[Mall]

No, I just feel like in Wolf of Wall Street. Didn't they do the IPO for Steve Madden?

[Rory]

Yeah, him and what's the name? Went to school together.

[Mall]

Yeah, I thought. Aren't they from Long? I don't know.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mall]

Well, either way, we are back. Sponsored by Boost Unlimited talk text and data. And currently right now, my single Still Be Mine featuring Lucky Day.

[Rory]

Yes.

[Mall]

Odyssey is out right now on all DSPs.

[Rory]

On all DSPs.

[Mall]

Rory, let them know it's on YouTube. Also, if you're watching this on Netflix, after you finish watching this episode, just scroll the video on Netflix.

[Rory]

There you go.

[Mall]

Found a loophole.

[Rory]

Everybody get their music videos on Netflix. You know what I'm saying?

[Mall]

Yeah, sometimes. Sometimes you got a lot of Netflix too. And say it's a sketch.

[Rory]

Yes, sir.

[Mall]

So it's. If it's not on Netflix when you're hearing this. It was taken down.

[Rory]

It was taken down. But Netflix don't take our down though. Let it rock.

[Damaris]

That's so cool.

[Mall]

Yeah, no, I thought that was a cool, cool stat.

[Rory]

Yeah, man.

[Mall]

I had the first music video up there.

[Rory]

There you go.

[Mall]

So we'll see how long it lasts.

[Rory]

We got a lot of. First, we ain't going to talk about our number ones.

[Damaris]

What's our number ones? One.

[Rory]

Come on. We got a lot of number ones. B.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Rory]

We the first to do A.

[Mall]

It's true.

[Rory]

You know what I'm saying? It's all good though we get to another time because sometimes you can't pat yourself on the back.

[Damaris]

All right, cool.

[Rory]

You know what I'm saying? They call that egotistic. We ain't egotistical over here. We ain't gonna do that.

[Mall]

We're not.

[Damaris]

Nah. I thought this was the egotistical cast.

[Rory]

Oh, hell, you probably have the biggest

[Mall]

ego out of the whole crew.

[Damaris]

Oh yeah, my ego's disgusting.

[Mall]

Yeah, by far.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Other than that at the end, I are pretty.

[Damaris]

Got the most pride though.

[Mall]

That's a fact.

[Damaris]

Ma has the most pride. I have the biggest ego.

[Rory]

I have the most pride. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. There certain.

[Mall]

I just ain't doing mall balances because a lot of times it is healthy pride. Like sometimes I have unhealthy pride, which is like bad for everybody. But healthy pride is a good thing if you can channel it correctly.

[Damaris]

What's the differences between the two? Like, give me some examples.

[Mall]

Standing on certain things for reasons like setting boundaries and things like that. I'll just have like ego pride on. Like I'm not doing that just to spite somebody, even though I may spite myself in the process of doing it. Yeah, like nobody's getting that off on me.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

I don't care if I have to sit in silence and everything up. Okay.

[Rory]

Yeah, definitely. That's definitely Rory. 100% for sure.

[Damaris]

That makes sense.

[Mall]

But what's everyone doing this weekend? I'm going to head down to the Roots picnic.

[Damaris]

Can't believe you didn't invite me. What a weirdo.

[Mall]

What? Tomorrow I'm going to go get my passes. I don't know how many I have. They didn't say in the email. So if I have.

[Rory]

Keep your sneakers ready. Keep. Lay your outfit out train. Lay your outfit out tonight, baby D. Cuz if he call you got to be ready to fly out the door.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Mall]

Cuz HOV is on Saturday, so I'm go down Friday and just. Just get the past thing situated and I'll let you know.

[Damaris]

Okay, let me know.

[Mall]

Because I. I mean I assume just because Guru and Bleak have been with all estate property, I'd assume we're getting a state property reunion. Like I'm. I know I'm feeling naturally, but I don't know like. Well, I assume Oscino is not going to be on it.

[Rory]

Well, I can promise you Osino won't be a part of.

[Mall]

And no disrespect to skin. I'm just. I watch his content and I just don't think he will be invited.

[Rory]

Unfortunately Oscino won't be a part of it. But you know, it is what it is. Yeah.

[Mall]

So I saw beans. I mean we assume Free will be there Young guns. Do we think as well?

[Rory]

For sure.

[Mall]

Okay. Peter Crack.

[Rory]

I could see. I could see Petey in there.

[Mall]

Okay.

[Rory]

I think he's still in good standards with everybody. Yeah.

[Mall]

Has. Has Eve ever been on the lineup for Rich Picnic?

[Rory]

Eve is filthy rich. Wants nothing to do with hip hop.

[Mall]

She do.

[Rory]

Wants nothing to do with festival.

[Damaris]

She do it for free.

[Rory]

Like charity Eve. Eve doesn't even remember her raps. She does not want to do.

[Damaris]

She performed at Roots.

[Mall]

She did. Okay.

[Rory]

What year was that? The first one.

[Damaris]

The first one is so funny that.

[Mall]

Yeah look that for your post Billionaire husband. 2023. Oh and I was probably there. I just have a bad memory. I Don't just seeing her do. You got me. And then just all the hits she has in Philly would be cool. Yeah, but if she already did it, I mean, and I know her and Hope don't really have, like, a connection, but I would like to see Hope Eve on stage. Both in Philly.

[Rory]

That'd be dope, I think.

[Damaris]

Damn.

[Rory]

Yeah. What about. What about Hoving Black Thought?

[Mall]

I assume he'll be on stage anytime. The Roots back the headliner. Black Thoughts. Like when I saw Usher, Black Thought was on stage.

[Rory]

Yeah, but I'm saying you think like, Black Thought and. And Jay got some new verse. Well, Black Thought definitely has verses we didn't hear, but.

[Mall]

Well, he has that. He has my favorite series in all of festival history, the J period mixtape, where he. He legitimately makes a new. Brand new mixtape on other people's. Who's he doing it with this year? They always pick somebody good. This year he's doing it with Wale. So Wale will perform all his hits and Black Thought will put original verses on each one of those Wallet hits. But I assume he's gonna be on stage. It's Jay Z in the Roots.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

So. And I mean, with Erykah Badu, we will get. Yeah, you gotta bring Eve if you're gonna do you got me live. You have to bring out Jill Scott and Eve with Erykah Badu. I feel like, yeah, it's all Philly. Yeah, I think that they'll probably try to make that happen. Jermaine Dupree and Friends.

[Rory]

That's gonna be fire.

[Mall]

Oh, yeah. We could probably go through JD If I don't have enough passes.

[Rory]

Yeah, hit JD I'm.

[Damaris]

I'm wary about the past situation. I was supposed to have passes to a concert yesterday, and I got there. I will call. They was like, yeah, you. You not on a list.

[Rory]

What concert was this?

[Damaris]

Ari. But it wasn't Ari that was giving me passes. But, yeah, I was supposed to.

[Rory]

Who was supposed to get you lead of passes?

[Damaris]

You know, but yeah, I got there.

[Rory]

They were like, no, no, no, we ain't doing that. Who's supposed to leave you passes? And they left you out there looking crazy.

[Damaris]

So they did put me on the list, but their list got there late. There's multiple lists when you, you know, when you go to concerts, there's multiple lists that come out. I was there early and I. The list hadn't got there yet. It didn't get there to, like, after the openers, but I had already went to Fogo de Chow and, like, started sipping on the happy hour.

[Mall]

So that's always awkward when you get to Will call and you think you're on the list and you're not. And then you just got to stand there like this.

[Rory]

You gotta stand to the side.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

And act like you're a publicist.

[Damaris]

She was like. She's like, excuse me, there's people on. And then people keep asking.

[Rory]

There's people that's actually on the list.

[Damaris]

Like, people keep asking you, like, are you in line? I'm like, no. Like, go ahead.

[Mall]

Like, questions like, hey, did they bring it? Did they bring the Passover, right? I'm like, you've been sitting here the whole time?

[Damaris]

No. Mind you, I'm standing out front of Wilco and I'm taking photos. Like, Alex is taking photos of me. So the will call lady is watching me take photos. And she did, like, the clock. It motioned. So I was like, oh, I'm on the list. She said, no, no, no, you just look good.

[Rory]

Nah, you're not on the list, but you look good. Every time they bring an envelope to the back, the keep looking like this. Every time an envelope come to the

[Damaris]

back, yo, then hit me like, yo, like, the list got down. Like, are you there? I am back around the corner from my house with Peach, drinking like, I'm gone. But I heard the show was amazing. Show.

[Mall]

Yeah. The footage looks good at all the Ari Lennox shows, so definitely suggest people go when she's in your city. But I'm excited for respecting this. You need. You need to come down with us.

[Damaris]

Who is us? You keep saying who's us?

[Mall]

The. The crew.

[Damaris]

What do you mean?

[Mall]

Everybody, Just everyone in New York is going.

[Damaris]

Oh, everybody in New York is going. Cuz, he like, he. I got to see how many passes I got.

[Mall]

Who else going with you, right? Oh, no, I'm. I'm Literally no one's coming with me to Philly. I. I'm sure people I know will be at the show. Okay, but I'm not getting anyone a pass.

[Damaris]

Oh, okay. I wonder.

[Mall]

But if I have extra ones, I mean, I will be charitable and pass them around, but, yo, you look good. And then here's a pass.

[Damaris]

Next thing you know, she walking up to Jay Z asking for a picture, and now you embarrassed, like, who you with?

[Rory]

I'm with him. Pointer Rory.

[Mall]

I don't know if I'm in good standing with the Carter family, so I'm gonna be far, far away from any backstage Jay Z situation.

[Damaris]

Oh, yeah. I don't know if I want to Go with you?

[Mall]

Well, I want to watch the show, like, for the whole set. Like, I want to be in general popular. Like, I want to watch the actual show.

[Rory]

Yeah. You want to be out front.

[Mall]

I don't want to be, like, behind the stage.

[Damaris]

I don't know about gin pop, maybe, like, the Doucet riser.

[Mall]

I'm sure there's probably something. Do you say related there?

[Rory]

Oh, for sure, but gotta be.

[Mall]

But yes, I am excited and anyone out there. I'll. I'll see you on the fairgrounds.

[Rory]

On the fairgrounds.

[Damaris]

Festival grounds.

[Rory]

On the fairgrounds. I'll see you on the fairgrounds.

[Damaris]

If y' all see Rory, walk up them and ask for a picture. He's not shy at all.

[Mall]

I don't mind taking photos at. At festivals.

[Rory]

That's why I don't go a. You don't.

[Damaris]

You don't like taking photos?

[Rory]

Why at a festival? I'm sweating. Hot, is yo. Come on, fam.

[Damaris]

The pictures never come out cute. Whenever I take a photo with, like, a supporter, it's always the ugliest photo I've ever taken in my life.

[Rory]

We. We go smoke and have a drink together maybe.

[Mall]

But last time we used security was at. I think it was at Roots, right.

[Rory]

First of all.

[Mall]

Yeah, yeah. Ma had the whole part, like, the Red Sea for him to come through.

[Damaris]

I stole.

[Rory]

That was out of love, though. It's out of love. That's all me love Philly me.

[Damaris]

And I think it might have been Armani. Stole, like, one of the. We were on the back of the little golf courts. Golf course.

[Rory]

Golf course. He was on the what? The golf course. I've never been on a golf court before. You've been on the golf court before, Peach? Never been on the golf court. What's a golf court?

[Damaris]

Golf carts. And we were, like, driving through the crowd and shit, like, beeping the horn

[Mall]

where they gave you, like you had the keys or somebody was driving you.

[Damaris]

I think we still. Somebody was driving us, but we like, okay. We ended up driving.

[Mall]

Gotcha.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Just being idiots.

[Rory]

I did that the last time I went to. When I was going to Toronto in the airport. You know how they. Sometimes they come through. I just jumped on the back with somebody.

[Caller]

Just.

[Rory]

I ain't feel like walking. I was like, which gate y' all going to? And it was, like, near mine. I was like, oh, perfect.

[Mall]

Yeah. One time a POD listener was driving one of those and said to hop on that airport.

[Rory]

Jump right on. Yeah.

[Damaris]

Oh, yeah.

[Mall]

But then it was like, you literally pass like old people Disabled people like you start to feel like a dick at that point. Yeah, no, no, no, not at all.

[Damaris]

Okay, If I'm running late to my flight, I don't give a. Get me there pronto.

[Rory]

Get me to the gate.

[Mall]

Oh, no, I was like, two hours early. There's no reason for me to do it.

[Damaris]

Oh, that was. Not as well as that. That's crazy.

[Rory]

But I used my Global Entry. Coming back into the US for the first time.

[Mall]

What's that like?

[Rory]

Oh, my God. It's the best. It's the greatest ever.

[Mall]

What? Like, what do you do? Just walk?

[Rory]

Literally just walk up, you show them your Global Entry card, and they just, like, wave you through.

[Mall]

I just don't fly international enough. I feel like, to use.

[Rory]

Well, that's the thing. You gotta be coming through customs in order to, you know. Otherwise it's just tsa. Preach. But if it's like, Global Entry, like, you have to go through customs, show your card. The wavy right there.

[Damaris]

You don't get a stamp.

[Rory]

If you want one. I mean, you can ask for one, but. Okay, I don't need a stamp from Toronto. I've been to Toronto plenty of times. Like, I didn't need it.

[Mall]

I want to collect it.

[Damaris]

Asking for a stamp. Like, when you like, can I get my Toronto.

[Rory]

I don't need another Toronto stamp. Like, I have plenty of Toronto stamps.

[Mall]

Well, I was mad. I think it was the second time we were in London. Or was it the first? They didn't stamp my shit. I was kind of, like, upset about it. Yeah, I remember I wanted my stamp. Like, I hate modern technology where I could just walk through. And now I'm in the country. Like, nah, yeah, stamp my shit

[Rory]

passwords. That's going to be a thing of the past soon, though.

[Mall]

I'm sure they're gonna find some type of digital.

[Rory]

It's gonna go all digital. All digital.

[Mall]

I mean, the racket they're running with the real ID is still blowing. My. I got my Jersey ID and they had that option to pay. I paid for it. But why? What if I get pulled over? Is a real ID or not, right?

[Damaris]

Bro, when I was flying.

[Mall]

What's the difference?

[Damaris]

I forgot my passport and I didn't have. I don't have a real ID and them charged me $40.

[Mall]

Yeah, you can't get through. You just got to pay 40. Oh, it's just. It's a shake.

[Rory]

$40 for what?

[Mall]

It's not for safety because I don't

[Damaris]

have a real id and I didn't have my passport. You have to have a real ID or your passport. And mind you, I was just flying to Atlanta and they were like, 40.

[Rory]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You need a real ID or passport now. Like, your state ID is not.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Valid anymore.

[Damaris]

Waste the money, bro.

[Mall]

Well, if you guys don't do roots, what's. What's the plans for the weekend? Supposed to be nice.

[Damaris]

One of my homegirls is going on a date with one of my homeboys, and I think I might crash.

[Mall]

Is it a first date?

[Rory]

No.

[Mall]

Okay, so they, like, like each other.

[Damaris]

They with each other. They cool. But, yeah, I crash. I crash people's dates. Get me a free drink, puff a little hookah, go home.

[Mall]

Okay, but, like, you should crash on double. Like, platonic double.

[Damaris]

That'd be cool.

[Rory]

Platonic double date?

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

I've never heard of such a malarkey.

[Mall]

You just be going with the marriage to crash the date.

[Damaris]

Like two. Like. Yeah. Like, you buy plus one as a plus one.

[Rory]

But what if I. Okay, so what if. What if we do that? Right? But then, like, we on a date and, like. Like your friends start feeling me, though.

[Mall]

Oh, no.

[Rory]

Ego, Right? No, I'm just saying pain, a scenario. Like, what's.

[Mall]

On a date with a guy she likes, but then you show up.

[Rory]

No, no, I'm just saying, like, because

[Mall]

she can't even contain herself.

[Rory]

It's platonic, right? So it's like, all right, we all chilling, vibing. But then it's like, her friend is there with homie getting r you giving rhythm. But, like, you know what I'm saying? I'm. I'm talking my shit. I'm making everybody laugh. It's a. Ah. Ah. You know, what if she start, like, having more conversation with me than her date?

[Mall]

I'd be so livid if the funny guy crashed my date. I think I'm going out with a girl I like, and then the funny guy shows up.

[Rory]

Oh, that's what I'm saying. Me and her start having more conversation than her and her date.

[Damaris]

Now I gotta distract homie.

[Rory]

You see, he getting tight.

[Damaris]

Yeah. I gotta distract him from the energy. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

[Rory]

Like, that could just, you know. I don't know, man. I don't know if I want to do that.

[Damaris]

No.

[Mall]

I kind of want to be so irresistible.

[Rory]

No, I'm not. See, Roy, don't do that. That's not that.

[Mall]

I like the confidence just at the pict know these people, but you just know if you get there.

[Rory]

I said, what if I let. What if I Led with what? If that's all I was just trying to paint.

[Damaris]

That's a homegirl you done mentioned before, too, so.

[Mall]

Yeah,

[Rory]

Okay. I like that.

[Mall]

Letting her date other people, that's crazy, right? I mean, right here.

[Rory]

You ain't even holding me down. That's what I'm saying. The baby they be doing out here,

[Damaris]

man, you have not. Yo, this got 10 siblings. I'm bisexual. I could date any of them. He has handed me not one handed me, just.

[Rory]

He just handed you.

[Damaris]

He got homeboys in jail. Homeboys that play international basketball, homeboys that play in the NBA. Nobody ain't here to be nobody, bro.

[Rory]

Cause I don't want to set you up for failure.

[Damaris]

I've never failed, baby.

[Rory]

Not you, but I'm just saying, like, the relationship might fail because a lot of my homies, ain't they cool.

[Damaris]

But don't they deserve someone like me if they ain't shit?

[Rory]

But you don't deserve an ain't shit nigga, though. I don't like he. You know, he be humping on you. You fall in love, and then you see this nigga humping on the next chick, then you gonna be in here throwing attitude my way. Cause I put you on with an ain't, Ma.

[Damaris]

You think that's what's gonna happen?

[Rory]

Yes. It's happened before. I've done it plenty of times with my homegirls. They'd be like, yo, yo, homie. I'm like, what happened? Play with somebody else. I'm like. I'm like, what?

[Damaris]

They do more what they do.

[Rory]

Play with somebody else. I'm like, what happened? Like, I thought everything was cool. Like, wrong. I'm like, yo, what happened?

[Mall]

The right.

[Rory]

Yeah, I thought y' all was cool. Yeah, y' all went on. Y' all took a little trip together or vacay on the island. Everything was cool. Like, you know, two months later, he was something else. Now you tight, like, ah. Y' all have fun for the moment. Oh, no.

[Damaris]

Right cat. Wrong litter box.

[Rory]

Right? See, so that's why I used to

[Mall]

be on that time. But now in my 30s, we're all grown enough. If you fall for it, that's your fault. I got nothing to do with it.

[Damaris]

Yeah, like, if.

[Mall]

Baby, before, I was more protective of,

[Rory]

like, if you somewhere and one of my homies and you. And you, my homie. Hit it off, y'. All. I'm not in that.

[Mall]

We in our 30s, though. Like, if you fell for it, like, that's your. That's your point.

[Rory]

But if I'm bringing you like, yo, my homie wanna hot. Now I'm. I'm lining it up. Yeah, I don't wanna.

[Damaris]

That's a recommendation.

[Rory]

Yeah, I don't want to do that. Now, if we just out somewhere and one of my homies start talking to you, then it's all, you know, that's like, yo, y' all grow. Don't call me when they go sour.

[Damaris]

Now, are you gonna tell him not to call you when I'm not answering?

[Rory]

Oh, no, he better not call me. I'm a clown that. I'm like, baby did what? She ain't answering you. What you calling me for? Yo, she at work today, mind you.

[Damaris]

We had a podcast.

[Rory]

Yo, tell me your Baby D there. Yo, fan, fan, fan, man. We're not doing that. We're not doing that.

[Mall]

Call like a house phone.

[Rory]

We're not doing that. Don't hit my phone looking for Damaris. Don't do that.

[Mall]

The amount of. I won't say friends, but, like, friendly associates in. In our world. The amount of them that hit me up to put them on with Damaris, and I'm like, what would you like me to do? Put y' all in a group chat. Like what? Like, I don't. That's weird.

[Rory]

That's what they want, though.

[Mall]

There's somebody you don't know. Now we're in a group chat. Yeah, hit it off. Yeah.

[Rory]

Maybe you don't mind. She'll have conversation.

[Mall]

No, the.

[Rory]

I won't maybe do you go, I

[Mall]

got, like, a lot with the Maris, though. I already be like.

[Damaris]

And, you know, so crazy. Every time he block, it proves why he should have blocked.

[Rory]

Why?

[Damaris]

Because he blocked some. And then we went around the block, and it. I was like, oh, you. You were right to block that.

[Rory]

Oh, so then. Yeah, that's a good point.

[Mall]

I know my dirt bag friends.

[Rory]

Yeah, he was trying to save you for some. For some. And here you go, dilly dallying. All right, go ahead. Go dilly dally, then. Yeah, go dilly. Go dilly dally.

[Mall]

Go do what you want. He blocked now. I'm like, well, I gotta see him tomorrow.

[Rory]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Damaris]

Huh? I ain't give up no coochie. That's all that matters.

[Rory]

That's all that matters, baby. As long as you don't give up the cat.

[Mall]

Yo, but you. You blocked. You posted old girl on your finster. And I replied and, dmg, where y' all at? No, no reply to this day,

[Damaris]

because

[Rory]

Baby D was probably.

[Mall]

You know, she was.

[Rory]

That's probably one of her pieces.

[Mall]

I know you. No, I brought that up in person with them, and they got really mad at me.

[Damaris]

Yeah, I know you way too well. I'm not.

[Rory]

You can't share no cat with him.

[Damaris]

No, no. I don't want that.

[Mall]

Even though we was in this together.

[Damaris]

This has been through enough.

[Rory]

She's been through it now.

[Mall]

She met a real one.

[Rory]

All right.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

You drop that zero, get with a hero, right?

[Rory]

Pop it.

[Mall]

Yeah, with a real man now.

[Rory]

With a real man. Not a strap on.

[Mall]

You don't think we'd hit it off?

[Damaris]

No.

[Rory]

My baby do. You hate.

[Damaris]

But now we talking about stuff that the listeners don't know about, so, you know, we.

[Mall]

But this isn't anything they can like, tie.

[Damaris]

No, they don't care because they don't know who it is. Peach yells at us about that all the time.

[Mall]

Fair. But I do think. I think our listeners should know how stingy you are with your friends. Yeah, I think that's a very important. That's a very important thing.

[Damaris]

So protective of them.

[Rory]

That's good, though. Baby, I'm gonna go.

[Mall]

I'm gonna go around the way the marriage has been going around.

[Damaris]

That's fine. Good luck with that.

[Rory]

Good luck.

[Damaris]

When them burn, you don't say none of me.

[Rory]

You can't say nothing. When they burn you, you can't say nothing. You can't call baby like your wife. Well, you tell me her friend was burning.

[Mall]

Knew I matter.

[Rory]

No.

[Damaris]

Because it's my all. It's my job to say, hey, stay away from my friends. Don't touch my friends. Leave them alone. You hit me up. Yo, what's good with Shorty? Nah, she cool. And you go and go around me and anybody.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's.

[Damaris]

You want me to tell you her business? I'm not going to do that, but if you don't listen to me.

[Mall]

So you're suggesting that a lot of your friends are burned?

[Damaris]

No, I'm not suggesting that at all. I don't know what they got going on with they coochies, but I'm just saying you never. You never know. It's 2026.

[Mall]

I know. I got the antibodies.

[Rory]

All right? That's what's up.

[Mall]

Been there, done that. My body's accustomed to it.

[Rory]

Netflix announces that the Breakfast Club will stream live on Netflix every weekday starting June 1st. What do y' all feel about that? I like that. Rory. I ain't gonna lie. I think that's dope.

[Mall]

When they were on revolt, they did the same thing. Yeah, it's a morning show. You should be able to watch it live. I think that's great.

[Damaris]

Why didn't offer that does every day

[Rory]

like that we can't be live.

[Damaris]

We can't be live.

[Rory]

No, man, not the we be talking. No, no, no, no. It'd be grand opening, grand closing.

[Damaris]

Once I have one live show.

[Rory]

You know how we like to tell P. Joe edit that.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

Ain't none of that when we go live. Like it's no edit that. It's just straight up like, oh, it's out there now.

[Mall]

Do you think we'd be more conscious of it though? Probably not.

[Damaris]

I think so.

[Mall]

Maybe on the first one. Then we start to get used to it. Yes, then we get used to it.

[Rory]

The second week is over. Somebody gonna say something that's just gonna be out there now and it's just gonna be like, oh, well, we getting an email tonight for sure.

[Damaris]

Who do you think would be the one to get us canceled out of the three of us?

[Rory]

Rory, for sure.

[Mall]

Can we pull the whole entire room, starting with Peach.

[Damaris]

Can we pull?

[Mall]

Who do you think would get us canceled first?

[Rory]

He says zip. Definitely zip.

[Mall]

Okay, Ryan, what do you think? Well, I'm saying on microphone, it definitely more.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Hell yeah.

[Damaris]

I feel like we're live. Mall is very aware of us being live.

[Rory]

Yeah, like if we live, it's searching

[Damaris]

when we go when we live stream. Mall is very aware of us being live streaming. When we're live streaming, you sometimes like just have your intrusive thoughts that just come out true. And like I. It's like, oh, I was joking. It's too late. You can't take it back when you're live.

[Mall]

Okay, But I know for the most part everyone's cancelable thoughts in this room that we've said off Mike. And I think because we have more of a left leaning audience, Mall would be the one to get us clipped of all of our egregious cancelable things that we think and say.

[Rory]

I don't think so. I think y' all underestimate me. Once I know it's live, I could censor myself. Really?

[Damaris]

Well, you gonna make a joke on a certain demographic of people and you're gonna be the one to get us canceled. Mall just be talking about black people and gays. Nobody cares. You.

[Mall]

Yeah, I don't. But I don't make fun of gays.

[Rory]

Neither do I. I've never made fun of gay people. Made fun. I've never made fun of gay people before. Don't do that.

[Damaris]

So what do You. What would you say it is?

[Rory]

Made fun. I may have laughed at something gay people have done or said. I didn't make fun of them. There's a difference. Okay, it's a difference.

[Damaris]

You didn't make fun of them for being gay. You just made fun of them. And they happen to be gay.

[Rory]

I may. Exactly.

[Mall]

But point it out a specific part.

[Rory]

If they were gay, that means, you know, lifestyle.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

I don't know if they're gay. I don't care about that. If they do something funny and they say something funny, it's like, what the fuck is that?

[Damaris]

Like, what's funny that a gay person has said that made you laugh? Not at them, but with them.

[Rory]

Damn. I can't really remember. Peach. Something a gay person has said that I made fun of. I can't remember. And I always.

[Mall]

We made fun of Charlamagne a lot.

[Rory]

What?

[Damaris]

It'd be stuff like that.

[Rory]

See, if we was live, it'd be out there.

[Mall]

Ma had to have a heart to heart with Damaris, man. I found out she was overpaying for great wireless.

[Rory]

Not. Not Damaris, too.

[Mall]

I told her to unlock the savings. $25 a month for the Forever Unlimited plan. It's a permanent price, Damaris, with no contracts, no price hikes. You can keep the phone you have in your hand right now, but you can save up to $600 a year. I wish you would listen to me more.

[Rory]

It's not listen to.

[Mall]

It's crazy. Stop overpaying.

[Rory]

Based on average annual single line payment of AT&T Verizon to T Mobile customers compared to 12 months on the Boost Mobile Unlimited plan as of January 2026. For full offer details, visit boost mobile.com

[Mall]

mall Today's show is brought to you by our presenting sponsor, Hard Rock bet, which is Florida's sportsbook, which everybody knows. And we are in the Eastern and Western Conference finals, NBA playoffs. Hopefully our Knicks are going to get there. But in the meantime, you can go to Hard Rock Bet every single night, right? And you can do same game parlays. Even if you show up to the game late, you can bet every single quarter. You could bet ON Somebody dropping 30, somebody getting at least 10 rebounds. Hard Rock gives you tons of ways to stick your picks into same game parlay built for the playoffs. Try your first bet on Hard Rock. Bet today and you can score $150 in bonus bets. If you win. Mall Place a $5 bet. And if it hits, not only do you get your winnings, but you also get an extra $150. Who knows what you could do with that?

[Rory]

Show it to me.

[Mall]

I already know you go crazy with that.

[Rory]

You know it. Download the Hard Rock Bet app today and let's get the party started.

[Damaris]

Woo.

[Rory]

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[Kalpen (Cal Penn)]

Hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm the host of Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I am sitting down with Ray Porter, the narrator of Andy Weir's audiobook project, Hail Mary Massive sci fi adventure about survival and science and what happens when you wake up alone, very far from Earth.

[Ray Porter]

I really had to make a decision because I caught myself getting that frog in my throat and starting to get teary as I'm narrating some of these sections. And it's like, okay, yo yo, yo, is this indulgence? And I really thought about it.

[Rory]

I was like, no.

[Ray Porter]

At this point, it would kind of be betraying the trust the author and the listener have in telling this story if I don't go through it. But there's places in this book that deeply, emotionally affected me. And I left it on the mic. That's great because it served the story. People will say like, oh my God, I cried at the end. It's like, yeah, dude, me too.

[Kalpen (Cal Penn)]

Listen to Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Book Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

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[Mall]

Visit Wells Fargo.com autographjourney Terms apply.

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[Mall]

Can't take it back. I was using that as a segue to tell you I got through that Jason Lee and Dame Dash interview, and I'm glad I did, because there's a point in there. Of course, he's taking shots at Charlemagne the whole time, saying him and Jason Lee are both gay. But it's not offensive to Jason Lee because he is gay. Dame.

[Rory]

Wait, what was Jason Lee's response to that?

[Mall]

He says, charlemagne is the straightest man in radio and the whole room left.

[Rory]

Okay, Jason, I get it.

[Mall]

But in the middle of the interview, Dame literally sits there in a serious way and tries to understand why Jason Lee sucks dick.

[Damaris]

Are you serious?

[Mall]

Like, he's literally. He's explaining how godly women are. He's like, why do you like dick? It's the funniest fucking thing of all time, trying to understand why somebody is gay and pressing them like, nah, you. You definitely not gay, though. And he's like, I'm gay.

[Rory]

I can assure you that I am.

[Mall]

And Dane, just not grasping the thought that somebody could be gay is the funniest fucking thing.

[Damaris]

Oh, my Lord.

[Rory]

I got now I gotta watch. Dude was telling me it was his suffering.

[Mall]

The beginning is. Is really rough to get through because they're arguing out the gate, and then it turns into a very funny conversation.

[Rory]

Cool. I got to watch.

[Mall]

But not trying to understand why somebody's gay is. That's your generation to a te. Like, I can't even fathom why you there's right here. Why are you sucking dick?

[Damaris]

And Jason Le had both.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

He made his choice.

[Mall]

We're not live.

[Damaris]

Why look at me like that? He. He had both. He made his choice.

[Rory]

But you said he made his choice. Like, why you got to say it like that, though? Jason, what's up? Jason Lee was supposed to come on. Come up here probably two or three times.

[Mall]

Three times. We're big supporters of Jason Lee. He just keeps dancing on us.

[Rory]

Yo, Jason, what's up?

[Damaris]

He's not a big supporter of you, obviously.

[Rory]

Nah, Jason's a busy guy. That's my guy, man. I fuck with Jason Lee, man. Like, Jason, what's up? Next time. What we doing, bro? I thought you was coming by to kick it, man. I talk some shit with Jason Lee. Good dude. I like Jason Lee.

[Damaris]

You understand why he's gay, though. You wouldn't ask him the same questions Dame did, right?

[Rory]

Do I understand why he's gay? That's what he likes.

[Damaris]

Okay, I'm just making.

[Mall]

I understand that people are gay. I don't. I can't unders. Like, I'm not trying to connect with it, but I understand that people are gay.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Rory]

If you're attracted to what you're attracted to, I understand.

[Damaris]

But I understand why y'. All.

[Caller]

Yeah, yeah.

[Rory]

But I. With Jason Lee, though. Good dude, man. And like I said, met him in LA and exchange was. Was cool. Mutual respect. And he said even though he definitely wanted to come. Come on the show. So. Jason, what's up, bro? We waiting for you, man.

[Mall]

I think I kind of want Jason Lee to interview Vlad since we're. Since we're on this. This subject.

[Damaris]

Oh, God.

[Mall]

Because the same way Dane was trying to figure out why Jason Lee is gay, I would like Jason to ask Vlad why he wants his penetrated, but he's not gay.

[Rory]

Who wants to penetrate?

[Mall]

All right, so.

[Damaris]

Oh, that's what he looks like.

[Rory]

Come on.

[Mall]

No, I'm all right. So who's that onlyfans chick? The white girl?

[Rory]

That Sophie Raines?

[Mall]

Yeah. Sophie Raines claimed that an NBA player offered $15 million to take her virginity, which she declined. And Vlad said, I'll take him up on that offer for My anal virginity. No LOLs either. No psyche. I was just playing around. And then he did a poll on Twitter because for some reason he didn't understand that the rest of us don't want to have our assholes penetrated by men. And he did a poll on Twitter and said, see. See, guys. 30 of people want their asshole taken for $15 million. So I want Jason to get to the bottom of that. It's not my world. It's not my. My thing.

[Damaris]

No.

[Mall]

Unless your freak flag fried nothing wrong if that's your journey, Vlad. I just, you know, I don't understand how you don't understand that the rest of us are not on that type job.

[Damaris]

15 million ain't a bad number.

[Rory]

It's definitely not to lose your virginity. I don't know about a man wanting to lose his anal virginity for 15 years. I'm not even speaking to that. But Sophie Rain makes a lot of money on OnlyFans.

[Damaris]

I feel like Vlad probably makes a lot of money, too. I feel like if his number was higher, more people would understand him.

[Mall]

Vlad is definitely rich.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

But even if I was poor, I'm not letting a man penetrate me with his dick into my ass.

[Damaris]

What would you do?

[Mall]

No, I just, like, want to make that very clear.

[Damaris]

What would you do if your son was at home crying alone in the bedroom and forth. Cause he's hungry.

[Mall]

Keep smoking crack. You will.

[Rory]

Nah, you better put on his shy and get with me. Come out here and get it in the streets with me.

[Mall]

You mean everyone got to pull their

[Rory]

own weight around here? Yeah. What?

[Damaris]

That's crazy. You want to take a little tickle? That's crazy as tickle. Yeah, a little tickle for your child to eat.

[Rory]

You crazy as hell. No, I can never look at my child the same, knowing I let a man anally penetrate me while he eating steak. What I had to do for that steak. You crazy as hell. No, I could never sleep again.

[Mall]

Like, it's not even. That's not even blood money.

[Rory]

That's just shitty. Yeah, that's butt money.

[Mall]

That's butt money. Yeah.

[Rory]

Like, I gotta sit with the little. You know when you got a hemorrhoid and you can't sit on. Sit down all the way, get the little.

[Damaris]

It's not that bad. Like, it's this.

[Rory]

How you know.

[Mall]

Wait, wait. Oh, I didn't want to go there. Whoa. That's why when Demerit's like, I take the 15.

[Rory]

I'm like, like, how you hot, baby D?

[Damaris]

I was.

[Rory]

How do you know?

[Damaris]

I Was literally about to say, I have gay friends. They have never.

[Rory]

Nah, we're not putting this on the gay friends. You the gay friend again.

[Damaris]

They have never complained, like, especially for your first time. Like, I'm. It's fine.

[Mall]

Okay.

[Damaris]

And most of these dicks is little anyway. You've taken shits bigger than that, you'll be all right.

[Mall]

But typically, a gay person wants a dick in their ass. That's probably why. It's not that bad. It would be rape with me.

[Damaris]

Well, yeah, but not if they're paying. Accept the money is not rape, man.

[Rory]

Listen, where's Pride? We were just talking about. We started the top of the show with Pride.

[Damaris]

Pride is the devil. Pride is the devil.

[Rory]

Sophie rain turning out 15 million to lose her virginity. Now I get it. Sophie Rain is probably the top five earner on OnlyFans, so she's making. She's made well, more than $15 million on OnlyFans. She's made over 100 million on it on OnlyFans, according to AI. 15 million to just lose your virginity.

[Mall]

Also, paying 15 million is to have shitty sex is weird, too.

[Rory]

Yeah, like, I want to know who the player was.

[Damaris]

A sick person who likes. Probably likes kids, but, you know, there's that.

[Rory]

Paying 15 million to have sex with a virgin is crazy. Just offering that is crazy. 15 million. Like, what are you going. It's not going to be enjoyable for you. 1500. Didn't have the best sex of your life? Go to college?

[Mall]

Or is she just, like. Is she one of those that, like, just has bikini pics on there?

[Rory]

She gets topless? No, I think she shows. She gets naked, but I don't think she, like, is.

[Mall]

Nothing's inserted.

[Rory]

Yeah, I don't think she's doing that. I don't think she does that.

[Mall]

Okay.

[Rory]

She gets naked on Only Fans, but, Yeah, I don't. 15 million. I mean, listen, she popping her because we had to turn that down. That just speaks to the amount of money she's making.

[Mall]

Or unlike Vlad, she's setting a precedent, and it needs to be more than $50 million. She said no to 15. Oh, she didn't say no.

[Rory]

She's at the auction.

[Mall]

I think she just put that price out there just to set.

[Rory]

This is.

[Mall]

This is the.

[Rory]

Or 30 maybe.

[Damaris]

Maybe she values her virginity and wants to lose it to somebody she likes and not just.

[Rory]

Maybe that can be a thing, too. Yes, but come on. Yeah. 15 million for your virginity. You ain't gonna be like, I am sacred. I am keeping it. I mean, you would have Put your ankle on your earlobe so fast.

[Damaris]

Not if you can make 101 and 1 million from not anybody.

[Rory]

I'm saying if you didn't. If you weren't making 100 million on OnlyFans, and the NBA player deemed you. He knew you was a virgin. He said, yo, I'll give you. I'll buy you $15 million in the morning.

[Damaris]

To take my virginity?

[Rory]

Yes.

[Damaris]

You saying no as an adult now that I know what I know?

[Rory]

No, you don't know nothing.

[Damaris]

Oh, because I'm a virgin? No. No.

[Rory]

You saying no?

[Damaris]

No. But now that I'm a woman, I've been dealing with men for free for so long.

[Rory]

I'm saying, you, you, you. You just a woman. You never had sex.

[Damaris]

I would say no.

[Rory]

I don't believe that I would.

[Damaris]

Because women, we're taught when we're growing up, we're taught that virginity is some, like, sacred Beau taught that. So losing it in a prostitution way is just like. As someone who knows nothing.

[Mall]

She's a prostitute.

[Damaris]

Well, yeah, that's her. He's asking me.

[Mall]

Okay.

[Damaris]

Losing it, like, in such a prostituting way, like, we would be like, oh, my God, no. We would feel so dirty. But women who have been having sex for a long time and realize that dealing with men for free is not it.

[Rory]

Yeah, of course, baby D. If A had 15 million sitting in your account and it said pending, and all you had to do was let that hit, and that 15 is in your.

[Damaris]

You're asking me with my knowledge that I have now I'm saying, yeah. You're asking someone who's a virgin and didn't know, doesn't know any better.

[Martha Stewart (advertisement)]

No.

[Damaris]

Me as a.

[Sonesta Travel Pass (advertisement)]

No.

[Mall]

Does she have $100 million?

[Rory]

No. She got a hundred dollars to her name in her savings.

[Damaris]

Oh, that's just. Come on now.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

And I'm saying a woman like that, that has. She ain't. She got to work. She's living check to check.

[Mall]

Oh, yeah.

[Rory]

She's And a just be like, y. 15 million I'm tomorrow.

[Damaris]

But people think virginity is worth so much more than it is.

[Rory]

I agree.

[Damaris]

Women, it ain't that big a deal. They think that virginity is worth so

[Rory]

much more than it not worth more than 15 million. I tell you that 15m.

[Mall]

See how much mine cost. A girl brought a $12 bottle of Be Grape over.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

That's all. That's all it took. For me, that's what. That's what got me out of my draws.

[Rory]

15 million. I wish I was a virgin and a Only fans model was like, yo, I ain't going to lie right now. 15 million for me to sit on it. And I'm like, no, I'm. I could never.

[Damaris]

But you're a boy. You're not. You're not raised in the same way. Your. Your virginity is not like, valued. You're a.

[Rory]

My virginity is not value. Are you telling me my virginity is not valued? I value my virginity.

[Mall]

Glad was raised better than.

[Damaris]

Than us.

[Mall]

That's what you're saying.

[Damaris]

His ass still intact.

[Rory]

Wait, wait, I'm not saying like ass play. I'm talking about like a. A woman just wanted to have sex with me because I was a virgin.

[Damaris]

Yeah, no, that and she's sick too. People who just want to have sex with people for virgin because they're virgins are sick people.

[Rory]

I believe that.

[Mall]

I believe that's weird.

[Damaris]

You want to have sex to the closest thing you can to a child without it being illegal.

[Rory]

There's something weird there for sure.

[Damaris]

Who search up barely 18 on Pornhub pedophiles.

[Rory]

Barely 18.

[Mall]

That's a. I think anyone that names porn period has a little weird going on. Like Busty Barely Legal on every videos. Like, why does. Why is Barely Legal the number one thing right here?

[Damaris]

Well, they just knows the. They know the algorithm. Yeah, we title YouTube not because we will watch it, but we know what people will watch. That's how we title our.

[Rory]

It's no.

[Damaris]

An algorithm.

[Rory]

We gotta. We gotta name this episode Barely Pot. Barely Pardon? Just to get the Barely the Barely crowd. It is Busty Barely Pardon.

[Mall]

It is funny too, when you've seen like a porn star that you have watched for years and like three years pass and it's. The video is like, yeah, I just turned 18. I've been watching you for five years.

[Rory]

Yeah, cut it out.

[Damaris]

Hey, man, people falling for it.

[Rory]

They do. Another one is when they be saying that it's their stepmom.

[Mall]

I'm like, that's sick.

[Rory]

Like, what is it?

[Mall]

That whole genre.

[Rory]

Even I know it's not real.

[Damaris]

It's like my brother Step all the. Yeah, because people. And they only put step because incest is illegal. Cuz if they could title my mom, people would watch Sickos. People are sick, y'. All.

[Rory]

Why y.

[Damaris]

Why y' all be surprised? Did you call your boy and yell in his ear for breaking the record? Like, did you like FaceTime him and scream?

[Rory]

Nah, he said to make that. He said to make that a sound. Put that on the soundboard, though. You got to put that on the

[Damaris]

soundboard the year or the echo Last peach got that down pack. He could like, mimic it perfectly. He sounds just like you.

[Rory]

Yeah, we got to get the year on the. On the soundboard. But no, I did congratulate him on. On, you know, obviously breaking the record and having 12 albums charting this week. It was just a, you know, just quick conversation of congrats on everything, man.

[Mall]

And which was the Michael Jackson record that he broke?

[Rory]

Most solo artists with the most number one has a Hot 100.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Most Billboard hits.

[Mall]

Oh, well, congrats. I mean. Yeah.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

That's crazy. Congrats to him.

[Rory]

Should have broke it last year when he. When he dropped what did I Miss? But, you know, they did some funny shit with it debuted at number two, I think. What did I miss last year? Wrestling radio was.

[Mall]

But wasn't it, like. Wasn't Taylor doing something that week or something?

[Rory]

No, they did something because I think he released it on a Friday. He released it on the 4th of July. I don't know what day that was. What day that was last year.

[Damaris]

Okay.

[Rory]

But radio did some funny shit saying when he, you know, debuted, it was. I don't know. It was some funny shit. So it debuted at number two last year.

[Mall]

But yeah, I think that's. That's great for him and that's a crazy, crazy stat for an artist. But I don't know, maybe it's more the Internet's reaction that I just don't care. Like, people dissecting which. What had collabs and like, is this a true number? Like, I. I don't.

[Damaris]

I don't.

[Mall]

I don't care that much because congrats.

[Damaris]

So that people know. They were saying. Because the majority of Drake's number ones have features. Either he's a feature or somebody else is a feature and he's the lead artist. And then Michaels are like damn near all of them, I think. I think except for. I think one or two.

[Mall]

Maybe Paul McCartney or just.

[Damaris]

Yeah. Are just him. So they're saying, that's not fair. I'm like, it doesn't matter. People. Like, I'm like, if you want to

[Rory]

look at it, I mean, yeah, he's still gonna.

[Mall]

Drake comes from the generation where a listers collaborate. Like, that's the era of music now.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Jay Z's first number one was Alicia Keys singing on the hook, which is ridiculous to me. But yeah, Beyonce has collab number one. Like it's we're era of collabing. Whereas Mike, those pop stars typically didn't do that. So I Don't.

[Damaris]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Matters.

[Rory]

Yeah. I don't. You know, however you want to dissect and break it down, I don't really care. I think the fact that he has 12 albums that are charting this week, to me, is. Is what I really look at. Like, that's fucking insane. He released 43 songs, 42 of them in the top hot 100. Insane. Like, shit like that is what I'm looking at. Like, that's just. We've never seen that before, especially from an artist that is a. A. A rapper first. Yeah. We obviously know Drake makes more than just rap music, but he's a rapper first, and we've never seen a rapper be able to do that. And we probably won't ever see that again.

[Mall]

Yeah. I mean, again. Happy for him. Congrats. I was a little more stoked for the Lizzo Chili's collab. I thought that was a cooler stat.

[Damaris]

They're collabing.

[Mall]

She's now the face of Chili's.

[Damaris]

That's fire.

[Mall]

Get your. They needed the rebrand because they were smoking back in the day with Chili's baby back ribs. Then they did the Austin Powers collab. Like, Chili's does good brand partnerships, but it's been a while. Lizzo's got to bring Chili's back.

[Damaris]

I think that's fire.

[Rory]

Chili's had a great fried ice cream they used to do. I don't know if they still do it.

[Damaris]

That's big bag this morning.

[Rory]

It's Chili's. That's what we're here for. We think we here to eat healthy.

[Damaris]

I've never been to a Chili's.

[Rory]

You've never been to Chili's?

[Damaris]

I've never been to a Chili's.

[Rory]

How you never been to Chili?

[Damaris]

I've just never been to one.

[Rory]

You gotta, Baby D. We gotta go to Chili's.

[Mall]

Do we?

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Peach is forcing me to go to Applebee's for the Don Pulio.

[Rory]

I think you got to get the Don Pulio.

[Mall]

I think Chili's has Lizzo. Applebee's has to get Peach.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Like, for sure. Peach has to be the face. Applebee.

[Rory]

You're not gonna get the Don Pullio.

[Damaris]

He's making me go with him.

[Rory]

Yeah, come.

[Damaris]

You gotta get him and Alex. They're making me go to get a Don Julio, which is an inflatable pool full of Don Julio Margarita or something.

[Mall]

Going to the one across from Barclays. Like, that one's lit. Like, they be hoes in there.

[Damaris]

Yeah, but they be young. They all from Liu. I know Cuz when I was a young ho from Liu, that's where you was at.

[Mall]

No, but Chili's, food wise, I think it's better than. Than Applebee's. I think Lizzo's gonna whip them back in shape and that's going to be the spot.

[Rory]

Now, Chili's definitely has better food than Applebee. Really? Yeah.

[Damaris]

I mean, Applebee's food sucks. He got mad at me for sending it back, but it sucks.

[Rory]

It depends.

[Mall]

You're just sending something back that they're just gonna put back in a microwave.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

And they're not gonna. They're not gonna make it any better.

[Damaris]

But it'll be hot. That's. And that's fine. If you're gonna feed me some. Some dog, feed me hot dog. Don't feed me mid lukewarm dog.

[Rory]

There's nothing worse than biting into something you think is hot and it's cold in the middle. Oh, yeah, that's the worst.

[Mall]

Every Hot pocket, I'll be feeling like

[Rory]

somebody ordered that at another table and they sent it back back. Yeah. And then you order right after that person, you're like, oh, no, it's right there. He ain't even touch it. And they just send it to you like, nah, I don't want that. Yeah, my food got to be hot.

[Mall]

I know, man. We might need to do the Don pulios for Game 1, NBA Finals at Applebee's across from the Barclays, so we could really on them.

[Rory]

NBA Finals at Applebee's?

[Mall]

Yeah. Get us a couple Tom Pullios.

[Damaris]

Sounds like hell, yeah.

[Rory]

That sounds wild.

[Mall]

You wouldn't watch the game at Applebee's?

[Rory]

No. Oh, I wouldn't.

[Mall]

Peach. I'm with you, man. That's my type of environment for a game.

[Rory]

It's just gonna be two. It's gonna be two packed. Yeah, it's gonna be two packed at Applebee's. Two packed.

[Damaris]

I keep trying to get my.

[Mall]

That's a sick spot, though, for everyone.

[Rory]

You gotta get there early.

[Mall]

Like, is it gonna be packed?

[Damaris]

Yeah, it's packed every time.

[Mall]

With the amount of bars I'm trying to think. There's Applebee's on Jamaica Aven and by Barclays Center. I don't know if there's other ones. There's so many bars that people would go to before they go to Applebee's in that area, fam.

[Rory]

I was in Toronto for one of the games when they was in the finals, and I was at a restaurant that it was. It was a nicer restaurant than Applebee's. And that shit was packed. I paid the bartender to hold a seat at the bar for me. Like that's how packed. So Applebee's, New York, the Knicks in the finals. Definitely gonna be packed.

[Mall]

Can you imagine if BBQs was still open in the Bronx and we were in the finals?

[Rory]

Oh, hell no. I think that's why they closed BBQs

[Mall]

in the Bronx for a regular season game.

[Rory]

Yeah, they knew Jalen was going to. They was like, you know what? This is the year we got to shut this shit down.

[Damaris]

Now are they still open in Times Square?

[Mall]

I think so. And The 1 on 23rd I think is still open. Pardon the local right now, but all of that.

[Damaris]

Oh, BBQ.

[Mall]

No, BBQs for the games is going to be crazy.

[Damaris]

That's insane. Yeah, but I like that energy, though. Like where me and Peach go to watch the game. Like, it don't be too packed, but it be. You know, it's energy.

[Rory]

I'm saying that. But I'm going uptown to Harlem to one of the handball courts to watch it. And that's probably gonna be the same type of environment. It's gonna be packed a bunch of in there, like in the park. But that environment is kind of cool outside in the park at dark. And the handball court is the projector. Like, that's a cool environment for the playoffs. Yes.

[Mall]

For the finals. I think I'll be too nervous. I'm gonna be a nervous wreck. I might need to be in my house with the lights off by myself. Not even in my living room. Like my bedroom tv, definitely doing a

[Rory]

seance around a candle seance around the tv. Like, what are you doing?

[Mall]

You know, in the beginning of Belly, when young DMX does his seance shit,

[Rory]

you gotta do that.

[Mall]

I'm gonna do the same thing with Josh Hart in the.

[Rory]

I think if we go back to. I don't know when we. We spoke about it. Peas. But I did say I had the Knicks walk into the finals this year.

[Mall]

You did.

[Rory]

Cause everybody was hurt. Like Indiana was hurt.

[Mall]

We were saying, yeah, we should have, and thank God we did. But I don't know, man, I'm excited. I just want to leave it at that.

[Rory]

Listen, now that it's finally here, I'm not gonna lie. Like, it's like, oh, shit, the Knicks are in the finals. We may not ever see this again. It's been 27 years since the last. Ryan wasn't even born.

[Mall]

Solar eclipse.

[Rory]

The last time the Knicks were in the finals. Finals.

[Mall]

None of us were born the last Time they won it.

[Rory]

Well, yeah, last time they won it, none of us were born. But now that they're back, the Knicks are back in the finals. How are we feeling? Do we want OKC or do we want San Antonio?

[Mall]

I don't. This series because we're recording this on a Thursday. Right now it's three.

[Rory]

The answer is okc.

[Damaris]

Rory.

[Rory]

We want okc. We don't want.

[Mall]

They both looked amazing and they both look shitty. I don't know.

[Rory]

You do not want to see Wimby come into the Garden, bro.

[Mall]

We did okay against the spurs this season.

[Rory]

I don't give a fuck what they did during the regular season. Season. The Knicks do not want Wimy to walk into the Garden for the finals. You don't want that. You don't want.

[Mall]

Just let Mitch step on his toe one time. Just step on to.

[Rory]

I take my chances with okc, you know, I think we throw some guys at Shay.

[Mall]

Well, he kind of looks like shit

[Rory]

right now, so throw Josh at him, you know, og. You know, put some bodies on him. I think Jalen fares better, you know, against OKC than. And having to deal with de' Aaron Fox and Stephon Castle and those guys over in San Antonio. I just think that it's a. I wanna see a great series, though. So I don't want it to be easy for the Knicks. I don't want it to sound like that. I don't want it to be easy. I wanna see a great finals. I hope it goes seven games.

[Mall]

I hope it doesn't.

[Rory]

I hope it goes seven. I want it to go seven.

[Mall]

That's fine. I hope it goes four.

[Rory]

No, I want the Knicks to win, but I want it to be like a seven game. Like, I want us every day to come in here, like, what the fuck? Like, I want it to be one of those series. I want the Knicks to win, but I just don't think that. I don't. I don't think we want to see Wimby come into New York for a championship.

[Mall]

I'm 36. Blood pressure is now a thing. Because I'm at this age. I don't need seven games. Give me an easy four.

[Rory]

Nah, that's.

[Mall]

And let's go right to the parade.

[Rory]

That's too easy. Set for another four game sweep. It's not. It's no fun in that. I wanted to go seven and we sitting down like, what the fuck?

[Mall]

But what if we win?

[Rory]

If the Knicks win?

[Damaris]

Scared of New York, bro.

[Mall]

What if we win?

[Rory]

I'm going to the parade.

[Mall]

What?

[Rory]

I'm going to the parade.

[Mall]

The parade? That night? Yeah.

[Rory]

I'm going to the parade. You gotta go like Juve.

[Mall]

Yes.

[Rory]

You gotta go to the Knicks parade. Like I said, we may not. We may not ever see this again. I'm scared in our lifetime, we may not have. Amara might be at three Knicks parades in her lifetime. Like you and I, Roy, you may not ever see the same.

[Mall]

But it could shift. It could shift the Knicks culture. We could be a winning franchise now.

[Rory]

I mean, I hope so. I hope so. Definitely a playoff. A playoff contender team every year now. But getting to the finals, you know, with healthy teams in the east, and you know how much it takes to get to the final. Everybody has to stay healthy. Everybody. You know, it's a lot that goes into a team making the finals. So for the Knicks to be in the Finals, days of rest. Because the west is not settled yet. So they got days to rest, no injuries. As a Knicks fan, this is like the perfect scene.

[Mall]

That's why I've been so scared. The whole playoffs. Everything's been perfect.

[Rory]

Yeah, exactly. So, you know, it's like that. It's that. It's the. It's the nick trauma and, like, I

[Mall]

don't even mind the idol time. I used to be scared of idle time because we have people like JR Smith who's gonna be drunk every fucking night in New York City. Like, they're all at home with their wives, chilling.

[Rory]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mall]

It's nerve wracking.

[Rory]

It's the nick trauma, man. It's like we all collectively feel like something has to happen, something has to go wrong.

[Mall]

Cat is really playing for his job. I mean, he's had a great playoff series. You think if we lose, they try to break up the team for Greek freak.

[Rory]

I mean, anytime you can get Giannis, you do what you gotta do. But I don't see the Knicks. I don't see the necessity in it. They got to the like, what can you like, you know what I'm saying? They got there, this team got to the Finals. Like, you get Giannis and get back to the finals. And then what? You know what I'm saying? It's like, all right, y' all just did that. Like. So I don't know if the Knicks break. I think that the culture that they have now, the camaraderie, you know, Giannis is the league MVP champion. I think you bring him in. We start at the top of the episode with this ego. Does him and Jalen get along, you know what I'm saying? I think it's just so many different dynamics that you have to think about going after a guy like Giannis. I just don't know if it's necessary for the Knicks to make that move. Think what they got right now. If it ain't broke, don't fix it, man.

[Mall]

Man, I think I would actually cry if they won. I'm not even joking.

[Rory]

Cry if they win.

[Mall]

Like, if they lose, you gonna cry? No, Used to. I'm. I'm numb to them losing. That's.

[Rory]

That's another day to me if they win. Like, if the clock is running down and the knicks are up 10 with like 30 seconds left and it's like for the. Is crying.

[Mall]

I've never cried cuz of a sp. I, like, like, really would think I'm gonna cry.

[Rory]

What? You have to cry as a New Yorker, you have to cry. We're watching the Knicks. Like, I'm not even a die hard Knicks fan like that. And I know I'll cry like, yo, they about to do it. Like, the Knicks have won a championship. That's insane. Like, that is something that every Knick fan is like, this is like, nah, this can't be happening. This is crazy. No, it's insane. So if they up like, yes. And it's like the game like this is. They won 3, 10 seconds and they're up. It's like, bro, the Knicks won the championship is. Grown men are crying. Yeah, that's a fact. New Yorkers are crying.

[Mall]

They had. It has to be a national holiday for that parade, though. Like, there's no way people can go to work that day.

[Rory]

No, no, no, no. You can't go to work on in the Knicks parade. No Yankees like we used to. That we used to. The Yankees winning, even though it's been some years, but it's like the Knicks win a championship.

[Mall]

Come on.

[Rory]

It's been.

[Mall]

We got to do the parade on the FDR. Like, not even on 8th AB or anything.

[Rory]

52 years. Like, come on, man. You got to celebrate that. Definitely.

[Damaris]

Mom Donna Stan.

[Rory]

Who? Mom Donna. What?

[Damaris]

Mom Donna Stand. You ever heard of that?

[Rory]

No. What is that?

[Damaris]

They saying it's Mom Donnie, like, but we Stan him.

[Mall]

Is that what you're saying?

[Damaris]

Like, Afghanistan, like, it's mom.

[Rory]

They call New York Mom. Donna. Stan. Oh, my God. I gotta move. I gotta move out of New York. I gotta get out of here.

[Damaris]

That New York Energy is back, man. The Knicks is up. Up is good. It's a good energy in New York. Well, I know you don't really Go outside like that. But the energy is. The energy is good, man. I think this gonna be one of them New York summers.

[Mall]

If we win, I promise you every supermarket not by choice is going to be free that night. Looting will be happening in the happiest of ways.

[Damaris]

Who's. Why would y' all do that?

[Mall]

To celebrate my D said everything's free.

[Damaris]

He didn't say that.

[Rory]

I think he ran on that.

[Mall]

Ran on it.

[Rory]

I think he almost bought his campaign.

[Mall]

I got on the bus and they was like 275. What? No.

[Rory]

I voted for Mom Donnie. I'm good.

[Mall]

The back door.

[Rory]

Yeah, back. Back door. I voted for Mom Donnie.

[Mall]

Mall summer is here and it's time to have my beard shimmering in the sunlight. I don't know if you can notice now. I know you noticed, but it's cool. You can play koi. I have the Baskin Lather growth oil in as far as the beard softener. I'm ready to be outside at the festivals. I don't have a care in the world at this point. Look, look, look at this.

[Rory]

You ready to shut your head off?

[Mall]

Look at the growth. Yeah, look at the inches.

[Rory]

I see you.

[Mall]

That is because I have the bask and lather in right now. Natural beard growth oil for fuller, thicker facial hair. A blend of vital nutrients to help nourish and increase the blood circulation right to the hair follicles. So you could have this right here. Mo, you could have my red beard if you wanted to.

[Rory]

Yeah, I gotta start using that.

[Mall]

Yeah, man. It promotes softening of beard and dandruff reduction. So you could wear a black T shirt and feel completely fine that you're not just gonna be flaky when you walk outside.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's nasty. That's bad business. We don't need that.

[Mall]

It's wild.

[Rory]

And this is also a black owned and family operated brand. Shout out to the CEO, Shayna and her mother. They researched and formulated their own scalp and hair oil to stimulate growth and to retain length. So we want to keep using this product because it is black owned and we appreciate that.

[Mall]

And no, I use it daily. It's been great. I've struggled with certain beard products. They don't work on my skin with my hair. This has been. It's definitely my favorite beard oil right now for sure.

[Rory]

Explore viral bestsellers and products of healthier hair of all types from Baskin lather. Go to baskinlathercode.com and use code Rory Mall for 20% off. That's 20% off at bask and lather co.com code Rory Mall

[Kalpen (Cal Penn)]

hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm the host of Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I am sitting down with Ray Porter, the narrator of Andy Weir's audiobook project, Hail Mary Massive sci fi adventure about survival and science and what happens when you wake up alone, very far from Earth.

[Ray Porter]

I really had to make a decision because I caught myself getting that frog in my throat and starting to get teary as I'm narrating some of these sections and it's like, okay, yo yo yo, is this it? Indulgent. And I really thought about it. I was like, no. At this point it would kind of be betraying the trust the author and the listener have in telling this story if I don't go through it. But there's places in this book that that deeply, emotionally affected me and I left it on the mic. That's great cuz it served the story. People will say like oh my God, I cried at the end. It's like, yeah dude, me too.

[Kalpen (Cal Penn)]

Listen to Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

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[Mall]

Visit wells fargo.com autographjourney Terms apply

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[Damaris]

Trip.

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[Mall]

Before we get out of here. Do we have voicemails?

[Rory]

You've got mail.

[Caller]

What's happening? Rory Mo demeris Shout out to y' all Just coming off of listening to the latest Reason episode Shadow Reason. That was an amazing project he put out. Definitely one of my favorites of the year. But let's get into it. You guys brought up Wale in the latest episode and how he was wrongfully left off the hottest one hottest 100 rappers list and you know, it just had me thinking. Obviously it's well documented. Your guys love for Wale and his discography. I'm of that same belief too. Came up listening to him in the blog area and all that, but had me think about how do we feel about a Wale Big Sean versus you know, this is just speculating but you know, obviously they are both contemporaries coming up in the blog area at the same time. Both have phenomenal discographies, commercial and critical success and hits and stuff like that. They definitely both have like at least 20 hits as well as a deep catalog, mixtape catalog to to reach into and features. But how do we feel about that? I'm kind of leaning with Wale taking the W on that. No disrespect to Sean, but you know I've seen both of them live. I feel like Wale's hits ring off a little bit harder and you know, especially when it comes to his features, the R and B back that he can get into. I feel like I see him kind of coming out on top on that. But yeah, let me know what your thoughts are. Peace and love and blessings.

[Mall]

That's a good question. I mean I think both Wale and Big Sean are underrated as far as hit makers like they do. Both have big hits that I Think people forget about. I'm not saying Wale would wash him, but I don't know if it'd be that close. And I love Sean and I think Sean has crazy record. I think Click will go crazy guap. Bounce back. Like he's got joints that would do really well in A versus Blessings would go up. But Wally has always kept a hit record. Every time he's put out all 12 of his albums. Yeah, like.

[Damaris]

And they can play songs that their features on, right? Yeah, because I think, I mean like that might be where Click is a good music moves up. Not pass Wally, but he moves up a little bit because Big Sean has a lot of big features.

[Mall]

He does. And, and not for nothing, like on Click he has a great verse with two of the other greatest rappers of all time. Like he keeps up. I just don't. Those moments, I don't know how crazy they'll be if it's just one quick verse when Wale can do that with no hands. Like Click would go nuts. But if, if w replies with Waka Rosco Dash, no hands and you have. Have 10 other records like that, just chilling.

[Damaris]

What would be your. Your first 10 if you were Wale?

[Mall]

That's a good question. Out the gate I would probably. I would maybe even in start with Bad Lotus Flower Bomb Dice, Pineapples. I might do a whole girl set to start the. Before we even get to any of the. The harder records.

[Rory]

Valet is being shown in a version.

[Mall]

Well, he is.

[Damaris]

Wale is. Yes.

[Rory]

And I fuck with Shawn. But Wale has like those, those records that Rory just named. I think that that's the, you know, that's what separates them. Sean got some dope verses and features too, and big records. But I think when you start getting into that set of just the, the women records, the records that the girls love, I think that Wale separates himself.

[Mall]

You got got 12 out the gate of just, just those.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

And I mean even recently, like Poke it out with J. Cole was a really big record years ago. Like I think that does really well in. In Versus. And I mean if they go back to older shit like Nike Boots, I don't know who's listening, how old they are, but Nike Boots was a huge record as well that I think would work in a Versus. Pretty Girls with Gucci Mane was crazy. Like. Yeah. I think Wale gives a lot of artists a hard night.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Mall]

Pause. You got records and that's no slight to Sean, but I'm saying I think Wiley could go up against artists that we say Would do better in versus than a Big Sean would. I think while it gives them a. A very, very long, long versus.

[Damaris]

I think Big Sean has a bigger advantage if the crowd is full of white people.

[Mall]

You think so you don't think the whites love Lotus Flower Bomb?

[Damaris]

I'm not talking about though. I'm not talking about whites love. No, I'm not talking about like your type of white white. I'm talking about like the hip hop whites.

[Rory]

The 7 11.

[Mall]

Yeah, but did they. Do they like Bigon or like the.

[Damaris]

The. The. The whites who go and see ludicrous at the fair?

[Mall]

Okay, yeah, those.

[Damaris]

But I think while you might not play, I don't with you.

[Mall]

If you play that would go crazy

[Damaris]

if you play that for that's white people's like that.

[Mall]

That's a hit record.

[Rory]

That's white people's dreams and nightmares.

[Damaris]

Yeah, yeah. No dead ass though. Like so.

[Mall]

I thought Journey was. But never mind.

[Damaris]

No, that might be white people's nightmares.

[Rory]

Holy.

[Damaris]

Oh, no.

[Mall]

Sweet Caroline. No, the whites, we. We do love. I don't with you. That would go crazy. No matter what. That's going crazy at a versus.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Yeah. And I think.

[Mall]

I think Blessings would do. Do really good as well. That's a good versus record.

[Damaris]

Long story short, Wale, when you have a song that people can get married to.

[Mall]

Yeah. Matrimony, like, like Plano Games should be a. A win for Sean. But if you follow that up with Usher, Matrimony, I don't really know. Yeah, I don't know what we doing there.

[Rory]

Where's that? Not that I really care, but I just want to see what that record is doing. The record with him and Leon Thomas. Where's that at right now?

[Mall]

Yeah, watching us with. With Wale and Leon Thomas on rhythmic airplay, Billboard, it's number one hot R B and hip hop, it's at number 14. And then overall it's at 76.

[Rory]

Okay.

[Mall]

But again, with pretty much every Wiley single for the last decade, it's like a slow, slow burn. Like they work the record and it takes a few months, but he gets the top 10.

[Damaris]

It's also very hard for. For the past couple years for. For black music to be in that top three. Them top three top five spots just doesn't happen that often.

[Rory]

Yeah, but I just want to see. Because that record is. Is incredible. Yeah, I just want to see what it was doing. That's all.

[Mall]

Yeah, well, yeah, I'm taking Wale in that. That matchup, but I also think Sean gives a lot of people A hard time, too. I don't think Sean's the easiest versus.

[Rory]

No, not at all.

[Mall]

At all.

[Rory]

That's actually a great matchup.

[Damaris]

I don't think so. So really, I think it's a good matchup because we consider them peers.

[Mall]

Yeah. Same era, I think.

[Damaris]

Same era, kind of. And people would assume that they have the same level of success. But that reaches into when we say that W is not as big as he should be because his records, like, be big, but he's not as big as he should be. W has better records, and that's no dis to Sean, because I love Sean song. But, yeah, been more consistent.

[Mall]

The good music thing, I mean, not to say W didn't have mmg. That wasn't big, but the good music definitely did help and put Sean in rooms and certain opportunities that probably W didn't get with certain records. But also, W's been way more consistent than Sean. Yeah, Sean takes, like, four years off in between albums. W's every year or every other year at minimum. So that's where it's kind of also not fair, too. Like, if you were just doing 2011 versus then. Okay, cool. But their whole career. Yeah. Wiley's just been way more consistent. Let my love with whiz kid go off like, that's. That's a point in verses. Yeah, but no, that was a good question. We have any more voicemails?

[Caller]

Yo, what's up with the pie? But I got a question for y'.

[Rory]

All.

[Caller]

So I miss Shorty for, like, six months, right?

[Damaris]

Right.

[Caller]

And whenever she go outside, like, she go ghost. And I don't fuck with that for, like, to me, like, when we're outside, like, talking, it's, like, important to me. But I'm not. I'm not saying, you know, she got to text me for, like, 30 seconds or nothing, you know, it's a little like, oh, I'm going out to this bar. Just made it f. To leave on the way home. Shit like that. Right? Just.

[Rory]

Just.

[Caller]

Just something instead of her, you know, going out, not saying she going out. Get into the crib. That mean, like, oh, I was outside. My bad. And like, now, like, we arguing about it. I'm just saying, like, bro, like, I don't want you to tell me everything. Like, just, like, you know what I'm saying? Just, like, let know something, you know, like, you going out, and for the whole night, I don't hear until you at the crib or the next day that that bothered the out of me. Like, I'm probably gonna Say, oh, she, she off on when she outside, which could be true.

[Rory]

Could be true.

[Caller]

I don't know. I don't know what she do outside. But like, I'm asking her, like, you know, just meet me halfway. You ain't got to. You ain't gotta. You gotta be in your phone the whole night. Just let. Let know something. You know what I'm saying? So what y' all think? What should I do?

[Rory]

So who's gonna drag your nuts a little bit, homie?

[Mall]

Who's gonna tell him?

[Rory]

Go outside and don't hit her phone. Just go outside. Like if that's how she playing it, all right, let her know this is, this is one on one. Like, it's all right. My ball, nigga.

[Mall]

Now, I. I don't care if you're in your 20s, 30s, 40s, if a girl goes out and especially if she's drinking and she doesn't text you, you're not the one for her, bro. No, I don't care what age it is. I don't care what age it is. If she's out and she's drunk and she doesn't text you, she's texting somebody else.

[Damaris]

That's not always true.

[Rory]

I. Okay, you know what? I like the fact that baby put always.

[Damaris]

That's not always true.

[Rory]

It's not always true.

[Damaris]

Often true.

[Rory]

It's not always true. True, true, but it's true.

[Damaris]

Sometimes I only drunk call people who I don't have health, the healthiest relationship with. If we talk all day, every day, and or we see each other all the time. When I walk out with my friends, I'm not talking to you. I talk to you all the time. So when I'm out with my friends, me and my friends are having a ball. The only stipulation that I usually have is that I have to let you know when I get home. I'll let you know. I'm home, I'm safe. You know what I'm saying?

[Rory]

But other than what if you text, I'm home and it's 5:30 in the morning.

[Damaris]

Sometimes you get home at 5:30 in

[Rory]

the morning and sometimes you single too.

[Damaris]

That also is true.

[Rory]

Yeah, sometimes you single.

[Mall]

99% of the time when you get home at 5:30, you're not single.

[Damaris]

I'm not gonna hold you. But lo, I'm not gonna hold you. Don't you know the craziest thing is, is the nights when I got home at 5:30 in the morning was the most innocent nights that, like, when you get home at 2 o', clock, it's. Cause usually you rushing home to sleep. Something like, are you rushing a yo. Club just closed. We about to 5:30 in the morning. You and your home girls was just doing stupid. Like, you weren't, like, you know, you weren't hoeing. Like, if you hoeing, you don't text. I'm home at 5:30 in the morning. You text you home at 2:00 clock with your bonnet on. Sleep. And then you hang up. All right, babe, get some sleep. Snatch the bonnet off and do what you was about to do. Hypothetically, if you're a cheater, I wouldn't know. I'm not a cheater, but 5:30 in the morning, I was at Sahara one time. 5:30 in the morning, me and Alex go home. 5:30 in the morning,. Sun coming up, we at Sahara listening to unreleased Jay Z and smoking hookah. Do a split to the middle of the floor, fam.

[Rory]

Go outside, have fun. Act like you single, dog. Like, if that's a constant thing, every time she go out.

[Damaris]

Yeah, if she, if you've complained about it and she hasn't changed it, she don't respect you. It's a respect thing. Not saying she's doing anything, but she don't respect you. If you're complaining about something and she's, she's not apologizing for it. Like, babe, I really just forgot we were having a time. Yeah. Or because if that's the case, she would be like, well, here, here's my location. You have my location. So I'm not gonna text you because I'm having too much fun, but you have my location.

[Mall]

So you think the girl that doesn't text him is going to give her location to him?

[Damaris]

I would do that. But yeah, I don't know about her.

[Rory]

Imagine having a boyfriend and you like, yo, nod and text you because I was having too much fun. It takes, it takes three seconds to be like, yo, babe, we here, there. Just got to this spot, about to get some drinks and eat.

[Damaris]

I think that that's corny. Like, if we in. Let's say we live in New York. If we spot hopping, I gotta text you every time I get to a new spot.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Hear my location, track me, watch me. Like a little sim.

[Mall]

Not necessarily every time you go to a new spot, but a check in. If you leave the house at 8 and it's past midnight, like, yeah, a check in is.

[Damaris]

Yeah, a check in is fine.

[Mall]

But I'm not saying every time you go to a new bar, it's like, just got to this location. Like, no, just.

[Rory]

Yeah, let me let. I need to know where my. Where my woman is at.

[Damaris]

But he didn't say that that was his girlfri. That he's been dating this girl. When people say that,

[Rory]

is she dating somebody else? You wanted to date us, that's why.

[Mall]

Yeah, I think he's just part of the options, that's all.

[Damaris]

Yeah, you wanted the dates.

[Rory]

It's tough being in a relationship, man, because you sound like a guy that really like her. He trying to, you know, me. She out.

[Mall]

I think it's tough. Tougher dating in these situations and being a relationship hypothetically, in the best way. You don't have to worry about that stuff in a relationship because no one's cheating. Cheating when you're dating now. And the access that people have to people. Yeah, bro.

[Rory]

No one's cheating in a relationship saying

[Mall]

in the best possible scenario.

[Rory]

Have you been living the last.

[Mall]

No, no. I said in the highest form, no one is cheating. So you don't have to worry about that. Dating now there's going to be a 99 chance that the person you're dating is probably talking to three or four other people, which is fine. There's nothing wrong with that.

[Damaris]

She can't text you because the person footing the bill said next to her words.

[Mall]

And he. And he already got the night mapped out. Yeah, but that's why dating to me is tougher than the relationship. Because like, you. You have to pretend like you don't like someone too much. Where, like, it's. You're not allowed to say, yo, you can't do that because that's not your girl. But you still feel like that still hurts.

[Rory]

But you gotta date to get to a relationship. I know.

[Mall]

I'm just saying that's why the dating process.

[Rory]

So if he's dating her and she's doing this, how you gonna get to the relationship?

[Mall]

Yeah. Well, she probably would say, you have to step up.

[Rory]

Up, step up.

[Mall]

Women just. Women just say words.

[Damaris]

Apply pressure.

[Rory]

Apply. So now when this walk into the spot that you in.

[Damaris]

My favorite thing. I love that.

[Rory]

And he choke you.

[Mall]

That's not what depression.

[Damaris]

I didn't say apply pressure to my vocal cords. Theoretically. Apply pressure.

[Mall]

Like I said, he'll get us canceled first.

[Rory]

Yeah, no, women like that.

[Mall]

So you inter.

[Rory]

Women like that. Women like when a.

[Mall]

In a consensual sexual way. Yes, women do.

[Rory]

Women like to see their pop up in the spy know. He mad that.

[Mall]

Oh, that's true.

[Rory]

Yeah.

[Damaris]

Depends.

[Mall]

No, that's true.

[Rory]

Depends it don't depends. You like that? That's why you giggling.

[Mall]

Definitely.

[Damaris]

Like, it depends.

[Rory]

Like, girl, this just.

[Mall]

That ego gets fed right away.

[Damaris]

No, look, I got.

[Mall]

I got. I got him off his square.

[Rory]

What it depend on if you popping

[Damaris]

up, cuz I started an argument with you and you know for sure that I'm just out with my home girls. Fine. If you popping up, cuz I ain't answering and you found me when I wasn't trying to be found. Yeah, that I don't find. No, no, no, that's bad.

[Rory]

No, it ain't. Why you ain't answering your phone?

[Damaris]

Don't do that, cuz. Especially if we're not in a relationship. Cuz if we're not in a relationship and you just like, you know we in a relationship. Oh, we in a relationship.

[Rory]

You ain't answer your phone, cuz, I'm pissed. I'm. I'm pulling up.

[Damaris]

I mean, that's fine.

[Mall]

He's applying pressure.

[Damaris]

But like, if we. If. But you. If we're in a relationship. You applied enough pressure. That's why we're in a relationship.

[Mall]

But if we're just clearly not enough.

[Damaris]

If we're just dating, like, if we're just dating. Don't do that. Don't pop up on if. I don't want to be found, don't find me. Me. See, if we're just dating, don't find me.

[Rory]

Nah, see, I'm.

[Damaris]

Cuz you might see some you don't want to see, yo.

[Mall]

Not wanting to be found in some

[Rory]

you don't want to see, like, me walking through that door while you with that.

[Damaris]

You.

[Rory]

Yeah, I walk through. Sit right next to y'.

[Damaris]

All.

[Rory]

What's up? Who this?

[Mall]

Oh, my God.

[Rory]

Who you from? You from Brooklyn? You got your cousin? Yeah, those my.

[Damaris]

Don't do that.

[Rory]

Don't do that.

[Damaris]

Don't do that with me.

[Rory]

Yeah, I walk right up. Play with me. Me. You was just in my crib last night.

[Damaris]

Oh, you hating ass. Don't do that. Don't you a hater. Word about don't do that.

[Rory]

You got in my crib right now.

[Damaris]

Don't do that. That's some OD hating. If we not in a relationship, don't come like, nah, she was just with me.

[Mall]

You old.

[Rory]

I'm not. I'm not talking to the.

[Damaris]

Talking to you.

[Rory]

Yo, you got your. Is in my crib right now. Send that.

[Damaris]

Send that in. Invisible ink. Don't text me. Don't. Don't say that out loud.

[Rory]

You bugging. I wish A girl would be in my crib the night before, and if she get dressed, leave, go out with her girl girls and be with another.

[Mall]

Probably happened before. Probably happened to everyone in this room.

[Damaris]

Yes, I know what's happened to me.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

And I. But I ain't never find out.

[Mall]

No, for sure. I'm just saying it's probably. It's probably happened.

[Rory]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. But then if I pop up and

[Damaris]

I see that, well, then why didn't you make an honest woman out of her? If you like her that much, why you ain't make an honest woman, why you ain't ask her to be yours?

[Mall]

If you like her, put a ring on it. Not even love. If you like her, yes, no maybe.

[Rory]

Ring on it.

[Damaris]

Yes, no, maybe box.

[Rory]

Put a ring around your eye. If you don't get about this restaurant

[Mall]

right now, like I said, he's gonna get this guest. He's joking, everyone. He's jok.

[Damaris]

I don't know. That's. That the dating thing that men do where it's like they feel like you're yours, but they still want to be able to date other people. So it's like, I ain't put no title on it, but. But like, you still belong to me. Yeah. Get the. If we're not in a relationship, it's not signed, sealed, and delivered that we're in a relationship. Please know I'm dating other people. Please know that even when I'm not. Just assume that I am.

[Rory]

See, with the marriage, you'll be talking all this tough willie. Gangster, right? And the moment you find out a. With another ch. Chick, that's when you start changing your hair color. You start acting like a whole new chick. You come in here, it's like today, but I thought she was like, yo, we in a relationship.

[Damaris]

If we're in a relationship. If we. If we're in a relationship and I find out they're cheating on me, then

[Rory]

they're not in a relationship.

[Damaris]

If we. They're.

[Rory]

Okay, but even if you're not in a relationship and you find out he talking to another girl, you're gonna be mad.

[Damaris]

If we're not in a relationship, I'm assuming that you're talking to.

[Rory]

I assume that, and you still gonna be mad.

[Damaris]

I'm only mad if I see you spending too much money on him.

[Mall]

Yeah, it's his money.

[Damaris]

It's a hierarchy thing. Even when we're dating, I still need to be number one in the hierarchy. If we're just dating, I can't just date you and you got a different favorite. Oh, no, no, no. I can't do that. Even if we're just dating

[Mall]

number one in his MySpace top eight.

[Damaris]

Well, if. If I'm brand new, then I can move her over. But if I've been here for a while and I'm not treated and there's a favorite, then I go, I can't, I can't.

[Mall]

What if she ill?

[Damaris]

That's ego. I have an ego thing. You said what?

[Mall]

Like, what if she's ill?

[Damaris]

That's what's up.

[Mall]

Okay.

[Damaris]

It's me though.

[Mall]

You.

[Damaris]

Good luck, Charlie.

[Mall]

When you're dating and you go on another date, do you tell the guy that you're going on a date or you just say you're going out?

[Damaris]

I said I'm going out. And I. I keep. I don't lie, but I keep dancing around it, so. But if you. If you are hard pressed to know, yeah, I'm going on a date, but I don't. They usually don't do that. Men don't usually want to know certain like that they ask, where you going? I'm going to going out. If I don't say I'm going out with Alex, I'm going out with Alexa, I'm going out with Allison, I'm going out with Rory.

[Mall]

I'm going.

[Damaris]

If I don't say who I'm going out with, I just say I'm going out. Heard you. Let me know when you get home.

[Rory]

Hell, make like they used to, boy, I'll be damn. I'll be damn. You doing what? Sit down.

[Damaris]

But that's corny. That's corny, ma.

[Rory]

That's corny. You can't do that. I'm trying to save you from your demise. You gonna go out here and one

[Damaris]

of these wouldn't be in a relationship with me. If you're trying to save me from my demise.

[Rory]

Yeah, we're in a relationship.

[Mall]

He's just trying to give you a large picture.

[Damaris]

How many you in a relationship with currently?

[Rory]

Now you going into other.

[Damaris]

Yeah, exactly. That's how they don't make like me.

[Rory]

No, sit down, sit down. Have some focus.

[Damaris]

I'm on with you on twin.

[Rory]

You ain't got no focus. That's the problem. Your energy, you spreading it too thin.

[Damaris]

So are you.

[Rory]

How you don't know that all my focus is right here. No, it's not. How what you missing when I'm lacking? What we lacking in our relationship?

[Mall]

What you feel like is. Marco.

[Rory]

What you feel like is lacking.

[Damaris]

Loyalty is loyalty.

[Rory]

You don't feel no loyal. Ain't no. Ain't no woman coming to you as a woman. She ain't coming. Ain't no woman coming to you.

[Damaris]

Just because she ain't coming to me means that she's loyal to you.

[Rory]

Loyal to you. Don't feel like you lesser than you ain't never been with with me and felt like you lesser than you have

[Damaris]

never been with me and felt like you was lesser than.

[Mall]

That's a fact.

[Damaris]

You wouldn't even know about that if you ain't asked me about. Stop asking me questions.

[Rory]

No, I'm not asking you nothing. I'm telling you to sit down and relax yourself and focus.

[Damaris]

Me and him are relaxing. Why would I focus?

[Rory]

All right, so then go ahead, get your and go with that. And that's how we gonna do that. We gonna do that real easy. You know what? Too much back and forth. Pack your up, get up out of here.

[Damaris]

Too much back and forth.

[Rory]

It's too much back and forth. We ain't doing all that. Pack your up, go be free. I want them to go be free. I don't hold nobody against their will. Go be free. Go ahead.

[Damaris]

But every action is an equal and opposite reaction.

[Rory]

That's a fact.

[Damaris]

If I go to call you and you with shorty and you can't answer the phone, guess what? But no, I needed you and you weren't there for me.

[Rory]

Okay, that's. That's.

[Mall]

Yeah, but what did you need? Because I hate that. Like what you need at that moment I needed you. Yeah, but like for what?

[Damaris]

I felt like I wanted to kill myself and use with another bitch.

[Rory]

Well, if you're going for that, you

[Mall]

call 1-800-better-HELP LOGIC LOGIC. I got logic number I got you.

[Rory]

If that you call 1-800- Better-HELP CODE RORY. That's what you do.

[Damaris]

Yo wanting to kill yourself and you call your. He don't answer. You think, oh my God, now I gotta take everybody with me like a middle aged white man.

[Mall]

Yeah, back in respect. It's like when women say I needed you and they're like, yo, what? What did you need? My bad. My bad. I need to know the capital of West Virginia.

[Damaris]

Like if I need the. Are we doing if I need to know the capital of West Virginia. You in your head and another I feel like you disloyal. It don't matter. I needed that game show. Maybe wrote the wrong answer on the mirror the I needed you.

[Mall]

I was your phone. A friend with who wants to Be a Millionaire Yeah, and you would have.

[Rory]

She's having game night the crib. And you was her phone friend.

[Damaris]

Piss me the off with a. Oh,

[Mall]

well, to that gentleman, I don't mean to be morbid, but yeah, she's probably.

[Damaris]

She don't like you like that.

[Mall]

Or she's not girlfriend.

[Damaris]

But either she do like you like that, but she really just does not know how to compromise. Or she's not girlfriend material. Or she don't like you like that. She texting somebody else. So either way, what you say, Ma?

[Rory]

Get up out of here. Take your dump her.

[Mall]

Dump her dumper. Well, new music out right now. An artist I love, Rory Still Be Mine, featuring Black Odyssey and Lucky Day, Available now. Shout out to Tao and Jessica and the entire Tao staff that let us shoot the video there. And Damaris's North Star has an album out right now. Yeah, I can't wait to hear that, big mama.

[Rory]

Shout out to Lotto postpartum.

[Mall]

Lotto.

[Damaris]

Lotto and Mariah, the scientists on the same album. I might explode.

[Mall]

Nah, but. But they're both in love. Love.

[Damaris]

Now, Mariah, scientist is always in love, and Lotto has always been in love.

[Mall]

Yeah, actually, that's true.

[Damaris]

I'm like, what are you talking about? Her whole entire last album was about being in love. That's why I liked it so much. I'm very interested to hear, I think this next single or the single that comes out, they'll have heard it by now, but that comes out tonight is Lotto and Doja Cat. And I'm actually very interested to hear what that sounds like.

[Mall]

Yeah.

[Rory]

When is Doja coming to New York? I think the end of the year. Going tour.

[Mall]

She's on tour for which album? I thought she already tore that album.

[Damaris]

She didn't. She took la?

[Rory]

No, she come to New York the end of this year, I think.

[Damaris]

Oh, wow.

[Rory]

Oh, trust me, I know. I marked it on my calendar. I know. I've been wanting to see DOA live.

[Damaris]

I just need to hear a Tia Tamara live. I want to hear that live so bad.

[Mall]

But yeah, I'm not mad at Lotto and Sexy Red either.

[Rory]

That should be good.

[Damaris]

I am. We heard it already.

[Mall]

Oh, we did? Yeah, that record came.

[Damaris]

Oh, no, I'm sorry. That was Glorilla, not sexy. Yeah, I'm sorry.

[Rory]

Album.

[Mall]

But I mean, I like. I like the features od Whiz kid

[Rory]

Tiana on that album.

[Damaris]

Jelly Roll is going to be interesting.

[Rory]

Jelly Roll? Jelly Roll.

[Mall]

But yeah, this is her retirement now.

[Rory]

This.

[Mall]

This is her black album, so. Okay, she Bet. What's her birthday?

[Rory]

Lotto's. I don't know. You think I know Lotto's birthday?

[Mall]

Well, I mean, we got December 4th to start our black album. I need to know where her is.

[Rory]

Yeah, December 22nd.

[Mall]

All right, December 22nd. Second. That better be the intro.

[Rory]

She got to start with that.

[Mall]

Yeah, and her mom better be be on the interludes.

[Rory]

38 special out to 38 special, eight shots. Met the man, Red met the man. I said, I say red man met the man. Dave East Ransom, Busta Rhymes. Some good features on here, man.

[Mall]

Shout out to Special Anderson pack K Pop's album. I was not aware of that until Ryan put that up there. I did not know we were getting Anderson paak album today. Yeah, but yeah, I'm always here for it. Young Ma Queen the album fire. Freddie Gibbs is putting out an ep. Three songs. I know he's been. He was going to do a deluxe. He's been sitting on record, so I'm happy he's putting out some joints. So RBT Freddy Gibbs EP is out as well. Yeah, this is. This a good music. Oh, Cherry from Toronto. Shout out to Cherry. Love Cherry. She has Mariah Scientist on there as well. Cashco Bing. Cherry's dope. She's. She's definitely one of my. My new favorite R B girlies.

[Damaris]

Like, she's.

[Mall]

She's dope.

[Damaris]

Who you run into first?

[Mall]

Probably that Rory for sure.

[Damaris]

Who next?

[Mall]

Probably Gibbs, then Anderson, then 38, then Lotto.

[Damaris]

Okay, I'm probably gonna do Rory lotto Young Ma, then probably Anderson.

[Mall]

Oh, we also get the future in Tyler Record, which I think is a perfect pairing. Supposed to be the World cup theme song. So it's already, you know, I'm sure been tested through the roof.

[Damaris]

Say hi to Netflix, Zip. Come say hi to Netflix or zip here.

[Rory]

What's up, you fly bum ass? What's the problem? Mad traffic.

[Mall]

Yeah, yeah, it was extra traffic. Is something going on in the city? It took me forever to get here. It's mad long just now.

[Rory]

Like a whole life out, that's what. Should never take that long. It's nice out this thing. Weather.

[Damaris]

Don't look at my purse. Yo.

[Rory]

Think it's outside. What you got in there, baby D?

[Damaris]

Don't worry about it.

[Mall]

All right, well, we're gonna get out of here. About to have zip on Patreon, where we're going to discuss the complex 50 greatest New York City rappers. I have so much to say, so many questions. Shout out to our guy Jordan over at complex. He is one of the credited writers on that. And boy, did we have a back and forth.

[Rory]

Jordan, I need to know how much how much arguing you did on the during the compilation of this list.

[Mall]

No, I know how much arguing I did with him yesterday.

[Rory]

Yeah, this list is absolutely crazy.

[Mall]

Yeah. So on Patreon right now you can hear our breakdown of The Complex Top 50 New York City rappers where they have Foxy Brown like over Jadakiss or something.

[Rory]

All right, we'll talk to y' all soon. Be safe, be blessed. I'm that he's just Ginger. That's Baby D.

[Kalpen (Cal Penn)]

Hey everyone, it's Kel Penn. I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Hearsay, The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Earsay, The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Mall]

Paramount plus is now the home of all your BET favorites.

[Damaris]

What? Yes.

[Caller]

With all new episodes of Tyler Perry's Divorce.

[Damaris]

Sisters you've always liked, a little drama,

[Mall]

plus a whole new world of movies like Gladiator 2.

[Rory]

Now I will control an empire original

[Mall]

series like the Shy.

[Damaris]

Just make sure we protect each other.

[Mall]

And live sports like ufc. Welcome to the history books. New home, same family.

[Caller]

Your BET favorites are now on Paramount. Subscribe now.

[Damaris]

Okay. Laundry stinks. Literally. I mean, you could just keep buying new under underwear. Not that I've ever done that. Or maybe sort your clothes into piles based on how re wearable or filthy they are. Or just use arm and hammer Deep clean. It's made for real life stinks and stains. So even if you don't do laundry, the quote right way deep clean will knock it out. I mean it is from the number one liquid detergent brand that tackles more loads than any other. Come clean with arm and hammer. Deep clean. Number one claim based on total wash loads sold.

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[Damaris]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.