Loading summary
Damaris
This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.
Kalpen (Cal Penn)
Hey, everyone, it's Kalpen. I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Hearsay, The Audible, and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Irsay, the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Ray Porter
What's up, y'?
Rory
All?
Ray Porter
Summer's got a different tempo. Everything's a little looser, brighter. One plan turns into another. You hear something, you stay a little longer. Next thing you know, you're somewhere you didn't plan to be. It's those in between moments. That's where the ideas hit. Conversations stretch out. Little memories sneak up on you. Sometimes it's just about what's in your hand. That color, that chill. The new Tropical Butterfly Refresher from Starbucks. Guava and passion fruit flavors with mango pineapple flavored pearls. Yeah, that feels like summer before you even taste it. Funny how one small stop becomes the best part of the day. Start your summer rhythm with Starbucks. Try the new Tropical Butterfly Refresher from Starbucks.
Reese Witherspoon (advertisement)
Picture this. Me, Reese Witherspoon in London, ordering fish and chips so often they might start wrapping me in paper. I'm traveling with my Wells Fargo Autograph Journey card. So I earn rewards wherever I book. Travel five times points with hotels, four times with airlines, three times on restaurants and other travel, and one point on other purchases. Imagine getting rewarded for eating a toad in the hole. Wait, what is a toad in a hole?
Mall
Visit Wells Fargo.com autographjourney.
Kalpen (Cal Penn)
Terms apply.
Mall
This is Daniel Cormier from the Daniel Cormier Show. This podcast is sponsored by Total Wireless, the official wireless partner of ufc. Power doesn't wait in the octagon or outside of it. You either make the move or you miss the moment. That's why you need a network that's just as powerful as you are. With Total Wireless, you get unlimited 5G data keeping you in the action from the walkouts to the knockouts. Now that's a total power move. Make your total power move today. Visit totalwireless.com or stop by your neighborhood Total Wireless store. Additional terms apply. See totalwireless.com for details.
Damaris
No worry enough. Yeah.
Rory
Thank you, thank you, thank you. Welcome back to another.
Mall
Just cuz he was the only one not clapping.
Rory
Oh, my bad eyes. Thank y'. All. Appreciate that, man. Welcome back to Another episode.
Mall
Yeah.
Rory
Of the new Rory and Mall podcast. I am sipping my tea. Baby D has made a special licks over there.
Mall
She's got the toes out.
Rory
Friday. Friday.
Mall
This is what everyone misses.
Rory
When she know that. Yeah.
Mall
No, I didn't know. I didn't get petty.
Damaris
Friday had them patent leather funeral shoes on.
Mall
I had to.
Rory
You had the what?
Damaris
Them patent leather funeral.
Rory
You had them Patty labelles on.
Mall
She had the grease on.
Damaris
You know them. I have more than one. That is for people with one toe. Yo, I had to take them shits off.
Rory
You got to look at your toe chart, baby. Then they show you exactly which shoes not supposed to wear.
Damaris
What taught you that?
Rory
No, it's a tow tr. If your toes are like. They have like the Greek feet, the Roman feet. You never saw that. Pull it up, Ryan. They have it. It's the.
Mall
If you're a lot of hoes, man.
Rory
Yeah. If your feet are shaped a certain way to me. Yeah. If your feet is. Yeah.
Mall
See which is your favorite. What's a big red flag for you? I know you have a theory about this. There's no way you don't.
Rory
The Celtic toe and the Greek toe is crazy. The second long toe is wild. The second long toe is crazy.
Mall
That's pretty common, though.
Damaris
Whatever one is the second, second one. First run of the second first one or the second row is whatever is the one I have.
Mall
Africa.
Damaris
No, before African. Yeah, Orient. Yeah, I have my. My toes go straight across.
Rory
That's what you see.
Damaris
They're almost all the same length.
Rory
No, you like this, baby D, you got African feet.
Caller
Yeah.
Rory
You're not straight across. Oh, your pinky toe ain't the same length as your big toe.
Mall
Yeah.
Rory
Now you more African. You from Africa, girl.
Damaris
Oh, that is Africa. Kind of. Yeah. I am African.
Mall
Ironically, out of this foot chart, African would be the closest that I would have to.
Rory
There you go.
Mall
See where we all originated.
Rory
Yeah, I'm Africa.
Damaris
People with Egyptian feet scare me.
Mall
Which one is that?
Damaris
The one with the big toe.
Mall
Oh, yes.
Rory
They just staircase.
Damaris
Yeah. I don't like staircase toes.
Mall
Yeah, they might be good at soccer, though.
Rory
German feet is crazy. The big toe and all the rest
Mall
of the
Rory
German feet is crazy.
Mall
But the German foot in your mouth?
Rory
Nah. Hell no. But then you. You. They have this baby DNA sh. The other one where they show you which type of shoes you. You should not be wearing.
Damaris
Okay, I'm going have to check that out.
Rory
Yeah, those right there. That mean for you? No, that mean African European shoes right there. You got to Go to Africa.
Mall
Yeah.
Rory
You know what I'm saying?
Damaris
Whenever I buy European shoes, I have to buy like 2 sizes up cuz they make like tiny ass.
Rory
You got African feet there you go.
Mall
See Long Island. Steve Madden.
Damaris
Yeah.
Rory
Come on now.
Mall
Can't do that. I think so
Damaris
Long island on people.
Mall
No, I just feel like in Wolf of Wall Street. Didn't they do the IPO for Steve Madden?
Rory
Yeah, him and what's the name? Went to school together.
Mall
Yeah, I thought. Aren't they from Long? I don't know.
Damaris
Yeah. Yeah.
Mall
Well, either way, we are back. Sponsored by Boost Unlimited talk text and data. And currently right now, my single Still Be Mine featuring Lucky Day.
Rory
Yes.
Mall
Odyssey is out right now on all DSPs.
Rory
On all DSPs.
Mall
Rory, let them know it's on YouTube. Also, if you're watching this on Netflix, after you finish watching this episode, just scroll the video on Netflix.
Rory
There you go.
Mall
Found a loophole.
Rory
Everybody get their music videos on Netflix. You know what I'm saying?
Mall
Yeah, sometimes. Sometimes you got a lot of Netflix too. And say it's a sketch.
Rory
Yes, sir.
Mall
So it's. If it's not on Netflix when you're hearing this. It was taken down.
Rory
It was taken down. But Netflix don't take our down though. Let it rock.
Damaris
That's so cool.
Mall
Yeah, no, I thought that was a cool, cool stat.
Rory
Yeah, man.
Mall
I had the first music video up there.
Rory
There you go.
Mall
So we'll see how long it lasts.
Rory
We got a lot of. First, we ain't going to talk about our number ones.
Damaris
What's our number ones? One.
Rory
Come on. We got a lot of number ones. B.
Damaris
Okay.
Rory
We the first to do A.
Mall
It's true.
Rory
You know what I'm saying? It's all good though we get to another time because sometimes you can't pat yourself on the back.
Damaris
All right, cool.
Rory
You know what I'm saying? They call that egotistic. We ain't egotistical over here. We ain't gonna do that.
Mall
We're not.
Damaris
Nah. I thought this was the egotistical cast.
Rory
Oh, hell, you probably have the biggest
Mall
ego out of the whole crew.
Damaris
Oh yeah, my ego's disgusting.
Mall
Yeah, by far.
Damaris
Yeah.
Mall
Other than that at the end, I are pretty.
Damaris
Got the most pride though.
Mall
That's a fact.
Damaris
Ma has the most pride. I have the biggest ego.
Rory
I have the most pride. Yeah, I think so. Yeah. There certain.
Mall
I just ain't doing mall balances because a lot of times it is healthy pride. Like sometimes I have unhealthy pride, which is like bad for everybody. But healthy pride is a good thing if you can channel it correctly.
Damaris
What's the differences between the two? Like, give me some examples.
Mall
Standing on certain things for reasons like setting boundaries and things like that. I'll just have like ego pride on. Like I'm not doing that just to spite somebody, even though I may spite myself in the process of doing it. Yeah, like nobody's getting that off on me.
Rory
Yeah.
Mall
I don't care if I have to sit in silence and everything up. Okay.
Rory
Yeah, definitely. That's definitely Rory. 100% for sure.
Damaris
That makes sense.
Mall
But what's everyone doing this weekend? I'm going to head down to the Roots picnic.
Damaris
Can't believe you didn't invite me. What a weirdo.
Mall
What? Tomorrow I'm going to go get my passes. I don't know how many I have. They didn't say in the email. So if I have.
Rory
Keep your sneakers ready. Keep. Lay your outfit out train. Lay your outfit out tonight, baby D. Cuz if he call you got to be ready to fly out the door.
Damaris
Okay.
Mall
Cuz HOV is on Saturday, so I'm go down Friday and just. Just get the past thing situated and I'll let you know.
Damaris
Okay, let me know.
Mall
Because I. I mean I assume just because Guru and Bleak have been with all estate property, I'd assume we're getting a state property reunion. Like I'm. I know I'm feeling naturally, but I don't know like. Well, I assume Oscino is not going to be on it.
Rory
Well, I can promise you Osino won't be a part of.
Mall
And no disrespect to skin. I'm just. I watch his content and I just don't think he will be invited.
Rory
Unfortunately Oscino won't be a part of it. But you know, it is what it is. Yeah.
Mall
So I saw beans. I mean we assume Free will be there Young guns. Do we think as well?
Rory
For sure.
Mall
Okay. Peter Crack.
Rory
I could see. I could see Petey in there.
Mall
Okay.
Rory
I think he's still in good standards with everybody. Yeah.
Mall
Has. Has Eve ever been on the lineup for Rich Picnic?
Rory
Eve is filthy rich. Wants nothing to do with hip hop.
Mall
She do.
Rory
Wants nothing to do with festival.
Damaris
She do it for free.
Rory
Like charity Eve. Eve doesn't even remember her raps. She does not want to do.
Damaris
She performed at Roots.
Mall
She did. Okay.
Rory
What year was that? The first one.
Damaris
The first one is so funny that.
Mall
Yeah look that for your post Billionaire husband. 2023. Oh and I was probably there. I just have a bad memory. I Don't just seeing her do. You got me. And then just all the hits she has in Philly would be cool. Yeah, but if she already did it, I mean, and I know her and Hope don't really have, like, a connection, but I would like to see Hope Eve on stage. Both in Philly.
Rory
That'd be dope, I think.
Damaris
Damn.
Rory
Yeah. What about. What about Hoving Black Thought?
Mall
I assume he'll be on stage anytime. The Roots back the headliner. Black Thoughts. Like when I saw Usher, Black Thought was on stage.
Rory
Yeah, but I'm saying you think like, Black Thought and. And Jay got some new verse. Well, Black Thought definitely has verses we didn't hear, but.
Mall
Well, he has that. He has my favorite series in all of festival history, the J period mixtape, where he. He legitimately makes a new. Brand new mixtape on other people's. Who's he doing it with this year? They always pick somebody good. This year he's doing it with Wale. So Wale will perform all his hits and Black Thought will put original verses on each one of those Wallet hits. But I assume he's gonna be on stage. It's Jay Z in the Roots.
Rory
Yeah.
Mall
So. And I mean, with Erykah Badu, we will get. Yeah, you gotta bring Eve if you're gonna do you got me live. You have to bring out Jill Scott and Eve with Erykah Badu. I feel like, yeah, it's all Philly. Yeah, I think that they'll probably try to make that happen. Jermaine Dupree and Friends.
Rory
That's gonna be fire.
Mall
Oh, yeah. We could probably go through JD If I don't have enough passes.
Rory
Yeah, hit JD I'm.
Damaris
I'm wary about the past situation. I was supposed to have passes to a concert yesterday, and I got there. I will call. They was like, yeah, you. You not on a list.
Rory
What concert was this?
Damaris
Ari. But it wasn't Ari that was giving me passes. But, yeah, I was supposed to.
Rory
Who was supposed to get you lead of passes?
Damaris
You know, but yeah, I got there.
Rory
They were like, no, no, no, we ain't doing that. Who's supposed to leave you passes? And they left you out there looking crazy.
Damaris
So they did put me on the list, but their list got there late. There's multiple lists when you, you know, when you go to concerts, there's multiple lists that come out. I was there early and I. The list hadn't got there yet. It didn't get there to, like, after the openers, but I had already went to Fogo de Chow and, like, started sipping on the happy hour.
Mall
So that's always awkward when you get to Will call and you think you're on the list and you're not. And then you just got to stand there like this.
Rory
You gotta stand to the side.
Damaris
Yeah.
Rory
And act like you're a publicist.
Damaris
She was like. She's like, excuse me, there's people on. And then people keep asking.
Rory
There's people that's actually on the list.
Damaris
Like, people keep asking you, like, are you in line? I'm like, no. Like, go ahead.
Mall
Like, questions like, hey, did they bring it? Did they bring the Passover, right? I'm like, you've been sitting here the whole time?
Damaris
No. Mind you, I'm standing out front of Wilco and I'm taking photos. Like, Alex is taking photos of me. So the will call lady is watching me take photos. And she did, like, the clock. It motioned. So I was like, oh, I'm on the list. She said, no, no, no, you just look good.
Rory
Nah, you're not on the list, but you look good. Every time they bring an envelope to the back, the keep looking like this. Every time an envelope come to the
Damaris
back, yo, then hit me like, yo, like, the list got down. Like, are you there? I am back around the corner from my house with Peach, drinking like, I'm gone. But I heard the show was amazing. Show.
Mall
Yeah. The footage looks good at all the Ari Lennox shows, so definitely suggest people go when she's in your city. But I'm excited for respecting this. You need. You need to come down with us.
Damaris
Who is us? You keep saying who's us?
Mall
The. The crew.
Damaris
What do you mean?
Mall
Everybody, Just everyone in New York is going.
Damaris
Oh, everybody in New York is going. Cuz, he like, he. I got to see how many passes I got.
Mall
Who else going with you, right? Oh, no, I'm. I'm Literally no one's coming with me to Philly. I. I'm sure people I know will be at the show. Okay, but I'm not getting anyone a pass.
Damaris
Oh, okay. I wonder.
Mall
But if I have extra ones, I mean, I will be charitable and pass them around, but, yo, you look good. And then here's a pass.
Damaris
Next thing you know, she walking up to Jay Z asking for a picture, and now you embarrassed, like, who you with?
Rory
I'm with him. Pointer Rory.
Mall
I don't know if I'm in good standing with the Carter family, so I'm gonna be far, far away from any backstage Jay Z situation.
Damaris
Oh, yeah. I don't know if I want to Go with you?
Mall
Well, I want to watch the show, like, for the whole set. Like, I want to be in general popular. Like, I want to watch the actual show.
Rory
Yeah. You want to be out front.
Mall
I don't want to be, like, behind the stage.
Damaris
I don't know about gin pop, maybe, like, the Doucet riser.
Mall
I'm sure there's probably something. Do you say related there?
Rory
Oh, for sure, but gotta be.
Mall
But yes, I am excited and anyone out there. I'll. I'll see you on the fairgrounds.
Rory
On the fairgrounds.
Damaris
Festival grounds.
Rory
On the fairgrounds. I'll see you on the fairgrounds.
Damaris
If y' all see Rory, walk up them and ask for a picture. He's not shy at all.
Mall
I don't mind taking photos at. At festivals.
Rory
That's why I don't go a. You don't.
Damaris
You don't like taking photos?
Rory
Why at a festival? I'm sweating. Hot, is yo. Come on, fam.
Damaris
The pictures never come out cute. Whenever I take a photo with, like, a supporter, it's always the ugliest photo I've ever taken in my life.
Rory
We. We go smoke and have a drink together maybe.
Mall
But last time we used security was at. I think it was at Roots, right.
Rory
First of all.
Mall
Yeah, yeah. Ma had the whole part, like, the Red Sea for him to come through.
Damaris
I stole.
Rory
That was out of love, though. It's out of love. That's all me love Philly me.
Damaris
And I think it might have been Armani. Stole, like, one of the. We were on the back of the little golf courts. Golf course.
Rory
Golf course. He was on the what? The golf course. I've never been on a golf court before. You've been on the golf court before, Peach? Never been on the golf court. What's a golf court?
Damaris
Golf carts. And we were, like, driving through the crowd and shit, like, beeping the horn
Mall
where they gave you, like you had the keys or somebody was driving you.
Damaris
I think we still. Somebody was driving us, but we like, okay. We ended up driving.
Mall
Gotcha.
Damaris
Yeah. Just being idiots.
Rory
I did that the last time I went to. When I was going to Toronto in the airport. You know how they. Sometimes they come through. I just jumped on the back with somebody.
Caller
Just.
Rory
I ain't feel like walking. I was like, which gate y' all going to? And it was, like, near mine. I was like, oh, perfect.
Mall
Yeah. One time a POD listener was driving one of those and said to hop on that airport.
Rory
Jump right on. Yeah.
Damaris
Oh, yeah.
Mall
But then it was like, you literally pass like old people Disabled people like you start to feel like a dick at that point. Yeah, no, no, no, not at all.
Damaris
Okay, If I'm running late to my flight, I don't give a. Get me there pronto.
Rory
Get me to the gate.
Mall
Oh, no, I was like, two hours early. There's no reason for me to do it.
Damaris
Oh, that was. Not as well as that. That's crazy.
Rory
But I used my Global Entry. Coming back into the US for the first time.
Mall
What's that like?
Rory
Oh, my God. It's the best. It's the greatest ever.
Mall
What? Like, what do you do? Just walk?
Rory
Literally just walk up, you show them your Global Entry card, and they just, like, wave you through.
Mall
I just don't fly international enough. I feel like, to use.
Rory
Well, that's the thing. You gotta be coming through customs in order to, you know. Otherwise it's just tsa. Preach. But if it's like, Global Entry, like, you have to go through customs, show your card. The wavy right there.
Damaris
You don't get a stamp.
Rory
If you want one. I mean, you can ask for one, but. Okay, I don't need a stamp from Toronto. I've been to Toronto plenty of times. Like, I didn't need it.
Mall
I want to collect it.
Damaris
Asking for a stamp. Like, when you like, can I get my Toronto.
Rory
I don't need another Toronto stamp. Like, I have plenty of Toronto stamps.
Mall
Well, I was mad. I think it was the second time we were in London. Or was it the first? They didn't stamp my shit. I was kind of, like, upset about it. Yeah, I remember I wanted my stamp. Like, I hate modern technology where I could just walk through. And now I'm in the country. Like, nah, yeah, stamp my shit
Rory
passwords. That's going to be a thing of the past soon, though.
Mall
I'm sure they're gonna find some type of digital.
Rory
It's gonna go all digital. All digital.
Mall
I mean, the racket they're running with the real ID is still blowing. My. I got my Jersey ID and they had that option to pay. I paid for it. But why? What if I get pulled over? Is a real ID or not, right?
Damaris
Bro, when I was flying.
Mall
What's the difference?
Damaris
I forgot my passport and I didn't have. I don't have a real ID and them charged me $40.
Mall
Yeah, you can't get through. You just got to pay 40. Oh, it's just. It's a shake.
Rory
$40 for what?
Mall
It's not for safety because I don't
Damaris
have a real id and I didn't have my passport. You have to have a real ID or your passport. And mind you, I was just flying to Atlanta and they were like, 40.
Rory
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You need a real ID or passport now. Like, your state ID is not.
Damaris
Yeah.
Rory
Valid anymore.
Damaris
Waste the money, bro.
Mall
Well, if you guys don't do roots, what's. What's the plans for the weekend? Supposed to be nice.
Damaris
One of my homegirls is going on a date with one of my homeboys, and I think I might crash.
Mall
Is it a first date?
Rory
No.
Mall
Okay, so they, like, like each other.
Damaris
They with each other. They cool. But, yeah, I crash. I crash people's dates. Get me a free drink, puff a little hookah, go home.
Mall
Okay, but, like, you should crash on double. Like, platonic double.
Damaris
That'd be cool.
Rory
Platonic double date?
Mall
Yeah.
Rory
I've never heard of such a malarkey.
Mall
You just be going with the marriage to crash the date.
Damaris
Like two. Like. Yeah. Like, you buy plus one as a plus one.
Rory
But what if I. Okay, so what if. What if we do that? Right? But then, like, we on a date and, like. Like your friends start feeling me, though.
Mall
Oh, no.
Rory
Ego, Right? No, I'm just saying pain, a scenario. Like, what's.
Mall
On a date with a guy she likes, but then you show up.
Rory
No, no, I'm just saying, like, because
Mall
she can't even contain herself.
Rory
It's platonic, right? So it's like, all right, we all chilling, vibing. But then it's like, her friend is there with homie getting r you giving rhythm. But, like, you know what I'm saying? I'm. I'm talking my shit. I'm making everybody laugh. It's a. Ah. Ah. You know, what if she start, like, having more conversation with me than her date?
Mall
I'd be so livid if the funny guy crashed my date. I think I'm going out with a girl I like, and then the funny guy shows up.
Rory
Oh, that's what I'm saying. Me and her start having more conversation than her and her date.
Damaris
Now I gotta distract homie.
Rory
You see, he getting tight.
Damaris
Yeah. I gotta distract him from the energy. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Rory
Like, that could just, you know. I don't know, man. I don't know if I want to do that.
Damaris
No.
Mall
I kind of want to be so irresistible.
Rory
No, I'm not. See, Roy, don't do that. That's not that.
Mall
I like the confidence just at the pict know these people, but you just know if you get there.
Rory
I said, what if I let. What if I Led with what? If that's all I was just trying to paint.
Damaris
That's a homegirl you done mentioned before, too, so.
Mall
Yeah,
Rory
Okay. I like that.
Mall
Letting her date other people, that's crazy, right? I mean, right here.
Rory
You ain't even holding me down. That's what I'm saying. The baby they be doing out here,
Damaris
man, you have not. Yo, this got 10 siblings. I'm bisexual. I could date any of them. He has handed me not one handed me, just.
Rory
He just handed you.
Damaris
He got homeboys in jail. Homeboys that play international basketball, homeboys that play in the NBA. Nobody ain't here to be nobody, bro.
Rory
Cause I don't want to set you up for failure.
Damaris
I've never failed, baby.
Rory
Not you, but I'm just saying, like, the relationship might fail because a lot of my homies, ain't they cool.
Damaris
But don't they deserve someone like me if they ain't shit?
Rory
But you don't deserve an ain't shit nigga, though. I don't like he. You know, he be humping on you. You fall in love, and then you see this nigga humping on the next chick, then you gonna be in here throwing attitude my way. Cause I put you on with an ain't, Ma.
Damaris
You think that's what's gonna happen?
Rory
Yes. It's happened before. I've done it plenty of times with my homegirls. They'd be like, yo, yo, homie. I'm like, what happened? Play with somebody else. I'm like. I'm like, what?
Damaris
They do more what they do.
Rory
Play with somebody else. I'm like, what happened? Like, I thought everything was cool. Like, wrong. I'm like, yo, what happened?
Mall
The right.
Rory
Yeah, I thought y' all was cool. Yeah, y' all went on. Y' all took a little trip together or vacay on the island. Everything was cool. Like, you know, two months later, he was something else. Now you tight, like, ah. Y' all have fun for the moment. Oh, no.
Damaris
Right cat. Wrong litter box.
Rory
Right? See, so that's why I used to
Mall
be on that time. But now in my 30s, we're all grown enough. If you fall for it, that's your fault. I got nothing to do with it.
Damaris
Yeah, like, if.
Mall
Baby, before, I was more protective of,
Rory
like, if you somewhere and one of my homies and you. And you, my homie. Hit it off, y'. All. I'm not in that.
Mall
We in our 30s, though. Like, if you fell for it, like, that's your. That's your point.
Rory
But if I'm bringing you like, yo, my homie wanna hot. Now I'm. I'm lining it up. Yeah, I don't wanna.
Damaris
That's a recommendation.
Rory
Yeah, I don't want to do that. Now, if we just out somewhere and one of my homies start talking to you, then it's all, you know, that's like, yo, y' all grow. Don't call me when they go sour.
Damaris
Now, are you gonna tell him not to call you when I'm not answering?
Rory
Oh, no, he better not call me. I'm a clown that. I'm like, baby did what? She ain't answering you. What you calling me for? Yo, she at work today, mind you.
Damaris
We had a podcast.
Rory
Yo, tell me your Baby D there. Yo, fan, fan, fan, man. We're not doing that. We're not doing that.
Mall
Call like a house phone.
Rory
We're not doing that. Don't hit my phone looking for Damaris. Don't do that.
Mall
The amount of. I won't say friends, but, like, friendly associates in. In our world. The amount of them that hit me up to put them on with Damaris, and I'm like, what would you like me to do? Put y' all in a group chat. Like what? Like, I don't. That's weird.
Rory
That's what they want, though.
Mall
There's somebody you don't know. Now we're in a group chat. Yeah, hit it off. Yeah.
Rory
Maybe you don't mind. She'll have conversation.
Mall
No, the.
Rory
I won't maybe do you go, I
Mall
got, like, a lot with the Maris, though. I already be like.
Damaris
And, you know, so crazy. Every time he block, it proves why he should have blocked.
Rory
Why?
Damaris
Because he blocked some. And then we went around the block, and it. I was like, oh, you. You were right to block that.
Rory
Oh, so then. Yeah, that's a good point.
Mall
I know my dirt bag friends.
Rory
Yeah, he was trying to save you for some. For some. And here you go, dilly dallying. All right, go ahead. Go dilly dally, then. Yeah, go dilly. Go dilly dally.
Mall
Go do what you want. He blocked now. I'm like, well, I gotta see him tomorrow.
Rory
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Damaris
Huh? I ain't give up no coochie. That's all that matters.
Rory
That's all that matters, baby. As long as you don't give up the cat.
Mall
Yo, but you. You blocked. You posted old girl on your finster. And I replied and, dmg, where y' all at? No, no reply to this day,
Damaris
because
Rory
Baby D was probably.
Mall
You know, she was.
Rory
That's probably one of her pieces.
Mall
I know you. No, I brought that up in person with them, and they got really mad at me.
Damaris
Yeah, I know you way too well. I'm not.
Rory
You can't share no cat with him.
Damaris
No, no. I don't want that.
Mall
Even though we was in this together.
Damaris
This has been through enough.
Rory
She's been through it now.
Mall
She met a real one.
Rory
All right.
Mall
Yeah.
Damaris
You drop that zero, get with a hero, right?
Rory
Pop it.
Mall
Yeah, with a real man now.
Rory
With a real man. Not a strap on.
Mall
You don't think we'd hit it off?
Damaris
No.
Rory
My baby do. You hate.
Damaris
But now we talking about stuff that the listeners don't know about, so, you know, we.
Mall
But this isn't anything they can like, tie.
Damaris
No, they don't care because they don't know who it is. Peach yells at us about that all the time.
Mall
Fair. But I do think. I think our listeners should know how stingy you are with your friends. Yeah, I think that's a very important. That's a very important thing.
Damaris
So protective of them.
Rory
That's good, though. Baby, I'm gonna go.
Mall
I'm gonna go around the way the marriage has been going around.
Damaris
That's fine. Good luck with that.
Rory
Good luck.
Damaris
When them burn, you don't say none of me.
Rory
You can't say nothing. When they burn you, you can't say nothing. You can't call baby like your wife. Well, you tell me her friend was burning.
Mall
Knew I matter.
Rory
No.
Damaris
Because it's my all. It's my job to say, hey, stay away from my friends. Don't touch my friends. Leave them alone. You hit me up. Yo, what's good with Shorty? Nah, she cool. And you go and go around me and anybody.
Rory
Yeah, that's.
Damaris
You want me to tell you her business? I'm not going to do that, but if you don't listen to me.
Mall
So you're suggesting that a lot of your friends are burned?
Damaris
No, I'm not suggesting that at all. I don't know what they got going on with they coochies, but I'm just saying you never. You never know. It's 2026.
Mall
I know. I got the antibodies.
Rory
All right? That's what's up.
Mall
Been there, done that. My body's accustomed to it.
Rory
Netflix announces that the Breakfast Club will stream live on Netflix every weekday starting June 1st. What do y' all feel about that? I like that. Rory. I ain't gonna lie. I think that's dope.
Mall
When they were on revolt, they did the same thing. Yeah, it's a morning show. You should be able to watch it live. I think that's great.
Damaris
Why didn't offer that does every day
Rory
like that we can't be live.
Damaris
We can't be live.
Rory
No, man, not the we be talking. No, no, no, no. It'd be grand opening, grand closing.
Damaris
Once I have one live show.
Rory
You know how we like to tell P. Joe edit that.
Mall
Yeah.
Rory
Ain't none of that when we go live. Like it's no edit that. It's just straight up like, oh, it's out there now.
Mall
Do you think we'd be more conscious of it though? Probably not.
Damaris
I think so.
Mall
Maybe on the first one. Then we start to get used to it. Yes, then we get used to it.
Rory
The second week is over. Somebody gonna say something that's just gonna be out there now and it's just gonna be like, oh, well, we getting an email tonight for sure.
Damaris
Who do you think would be the one to get us canceled out of the three of us?
Rory
Rory, for sure.
Mall
Can we pull the whole entire room, starting with Peach.
Damaris
Can we pull?
Mall
Who do you think would get us canceled first?
Rory
He says zip. Definitely zip.
Mall
Okay, Ryan, what do you think? Well, I'm saying on microphone, it definitely more.
Damaris
Yeah.
Mall
Hell yeah.
Damaris
I feel like we're live. Mall is very aware of us being live.
Rory
Yeah, like if we live, it's searching
Damaris
when we go when we live stream. Mall is very aware of us being live streaming. When we're live streaming, you sometimes like just have your intrusive thoughts that just come out true. And like I. It's like, oh, I was joking. It's too late. You can't take it back when you're live.
Mall
Okay, But I know for the most part everyone's cancelable thoughts in this room that we've said off Mike. And I think because we have more of a left leaning audience, Mall would be the one to get us clipped of all of our egregious cancelable things that we think and say.
Rory
I don't think so. I think y' all underestimate me. Once I know it's live, I could censor myself. Really?
Damaris
Well, you gonna make a joke on a certain demographic of people and you're gonna be the one to get us canceled. Mall just be talking about black people and gays. Nobody cares. You.
Mall
Yeah, I don't. But I don't make fun of gays.
Rory
Neither do I. I've never made fun of gay people. Made fun. I've never made fun of gay people before. Don't do that.
Damaris
So what do You. What would you say it is?
Rory
Made fun. I may have laughed at something gay people have done or said. I didn't make fun of them. There's a difference. Okay, it's a difference.
Damaris
You didn't make fun of them for being gay. You just made fun of them. And they happen to be gay.
Rory
I may. Exactly.
Mall
But point it out a specific part.
Rory
If they were gay, that means, you know, lifestyle.
Damaris
Yeah.
Rory
I don't know if they're gay. I don't care about that. If they do something funny and they say something funny, it's like, what the fuck is that?
Damaris
Like, what's funny that a gay person has said that made you laugh? Not at them, but with them.
Rory
Damn. I can't really remember. Peach. Something a gay person has said that I made fun of. I can't remember. And I always.
Mall
We made fun of Charlamagne a lot.
Rory
What?
Damaris
It'd be stuff like that.
Rory
See, if we was live, it'd be out there.
Mall
Ma had to have a heart to heart with Damaris, man. I found out she was overpaying for great wireless.
Rory
Not. Not Damaris, too.
Mall
I told her to unlock the savings. $25 a month for the Forever Unlimited plan. It's a permanent price, Damaris, with no contracts, no price hikes. You can keep the phone you have in your hand right now, but you can save up to $600 a year. I wish you would listen to me more.
Rory
It's not listen to.
Mall
It's crazy. Stop overpaying.
Rory
Based on average annual single line payment of AT&T Verizon to T Mobile customers compared to 12 months on the Boost Mobile Unlimited plan as of January 2026. For full offer details, visit boost mobile.com
Mall
mall Today's show is brought to you by our presenting sponsor, Hard Rock bet, which is Florida's sportsbook, which everybody knows. And we are in the Eastern and Western Conference finals, NBA playoffs. Hopefully our Knicks are going to get there. But in the meantime, you can go to Hard Rock Bet every single night, right? And you can do same game parlays. Even if you show up to the game late, you can bet every single quarter. You could bet ON Somebody dropping 30, somebody getting at least 10 rebounds. Hard Rock gives you tons of ways to stick your picks into same game parlay built for the playoffs. Try your first bet on Hard Rock. Bet today and you can score $150 in bonus bets. If you win. Mall Place a $5 bet. And if it hits, not only do you get your winnings, but you also get an extra $150. Who knows what you could do with that?
Rory
Show it to me.
Mall
I already know you go crazy with that.
Rory
You know it. Download the Hard Rock Bet app today and let's get the party started.
Damaris
Woo.
Rory
Pairborn Bonus bets Not a cash offer offered by the Seminole Tribe of Florida in Florida. Offered by Seminole Hard Rock Digital LLC in all other states. Must be 21 plus and physically present in Arizona, Colorado, Florida, Illinois, Indiana, Michigan, New Jersey, Ohio, Tennessee or Virgin. Terms and conditions apply. Concerned about gambling in Florida, you call 1-833-play- wise in Indiana. If you or someone you know has a gambling problem wants help, call 1-800-9 with it gambling problem, call 1-800- gambler Arizona, Colorado, Illinois, Michigan, New Jersey, Ohio, Tennessee and Virginia.
Kalpen (Cal Penn)
Hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm the host of Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I am sitting down with Ray Porter, the narrator of Andy Weir's audiobook project, Hail Mary Massive sci fi adventure about survival and science and what happens when you wake up alone, very far from Earth.
Ray Porter
I really had to make a decision because I caught myself getting that frog in my throat and starting to get teary as I'm narrating some of these sections. And it's like, okay, yo yo, yo, is this indulgence? And I really thought about it.
Rory
I was like, no.
Ray Porter
At this point, it would kind of be betraying the trust the author and the listener have in telling this story if I don't go through it. But there's places in this book that deeply, emotionally affected me. And I left it on the mic. That's great because it served the story. People will say like, oh my God, I cried at the end. It's like, yeah, dude, me too.
Kalpen (Cal Penn)
Listen to Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Book Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Martha Stewart (advertisement)
This is Martha Stewart from the Martha Stewart Podcast. Ever wonder how to make hosting look effortless? Here's a secret Getting ahead of the mess with new Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep paper. Just lightly wet the counter beforehand so the paper grips and stays in place. Then lay down the Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep paper so drips and spills stay on the paper, not all over your kitchen counter. You can roll out dough, prep a party spread, or cook alongside family. When you're done, cleanup is as simple as lifting the paper and revealing that clean counter underneath. Effortless. You can use it for cooking and baking prep and even crafting, especially when you need extra working space because when the mess is already handled, you can focus on what matters. The food, the people, and the moment. It may look effortless, but now you know. It's Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep paper. Take a tip from me. Wet it, set it, prep it, done. Make it easy. Make it with Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep paper available now in the Reynolds wrap aisle and Walmart, Target, Amazon, and Costco.
Reese Witherspoon (advertisement)
Picture this. Me, Reese Witherspoon in London ordering fish and chips so often they might start wrapping me in paper. I'm traveling with my Wells Fargo Autograph Journey card, so I earn rewards wherever I book. Travel five times points with hotels, four times with airlines, three times on restaurants and other travel, and one point on other purchases. Imagine getting rewarded for eating a toad in the hole. Wait, what is a toad in a hole?
Mall
Visit Wells Fargo.com autographjourney Terms apply.
Sonesta Travel Pass (advertisement)
Sonesta Travel Pass is the most rewarding way to travel, designed to help you get more out of every stay. Sign up@sonesta.com to enjoy instant savings, bonus points, and valuable perks like early check in, late checkout room upgrades and free stays. Over time. With Sonesta Travel Pass, every stay brings you closer to your next reward. Choose from more than 1100 hotels across 13 distinctive brands and unlock the best available rates when you book direct with Sonesta Travel Pass. Here today, Rome tomorrow. Join now@sonesta.com Terms and conditions apply.
Mall
Can't take it back. I was using that as a segue to tell you I got through that Jason Lee and Dame Dash interview, and I'm glad I did, because there's a point in there. Of course, he's taking shots at Charlemagne the whole time, saying him and Jason Lee are both gay. But it's not offensive to Jason Lee because he is gay. Dame.
Rory
Wait, what was Jason Lee's response to that?
Mall
He says, charlemagne is the straightest man in radio and the whole room left.
Rory
Okay, Jason, I get it.
Mall
But in the middle of the interview, Dame literally sits there in a serious way and tries to understand why Jason Lee sucks dick.
Damaris
Are you serious?
Mall
Like, he's literally. He's explaining how godly women are. He's like, why do you like dick? It's the funniest fucking thing of all time, trying to understand why somebody is gay and pressing them like, nah, you. You definitely not gay, though. And he's like, I'm gay.
Rory
I can assure you that I am.
Mall
And Dane, just not grasping the thought that somebody could be gay is the funniest fucking thing.
Damaris
Oh, my Lord.
Rory
I got now I gotta watch. Dude was telling me it was his suffering.
Mall
The beginning is. Is really rough to get through because they're arguing out the gate, and then it turns into a very funny conversation.
Rory
Cool. I got to watch.
Mall
But not trying to understand why somebody's gay is. That's your generation to a te. Like, I can't even fathom why you there's right here. Why are you sucking dick?
Damaris
And Jason Le had both.
Mall
Yeah.
Damaris
He made his choice.
Mall
We're not live.
Damaris
Why look at me like that? He. He had both. He made his choice.
Rory
But you said he made his choice. Like, why you got to say it like that, though? Jason, what's up? Jason Lee was supposed to come on. Come up here probably two or three times.
Mall
Three times. We're big supporters of Jason Lee. He just keeps dancing on us.
Rory
Yo, Jason, what's up?
Damaris
He's not a big supporter of you, obviously.
Rory
Nah, Jason's a busy guy. That's my guy, man. I fuck with Jason Lee, man. Like, Jason, what's up? Next time. What we doing, bro? I thought you was coming by to kick it, man. I talk some shit with Jason Lee. Good dude. I like Jason Lee.
Damaris
You understand why he's gay, though. You wouldn't ask him the same questions Dame did, right?
Rory
Do I understand why he's gay? That's what he likes.
Damaris
Okay, I'm just making.
Mall
I understand that people are gay. I don't. I can't unders. Like, I'm not trying to connect with it, but I understand that people are gay.
Damaris
Yeah.
Rory
If you're attracted to what you're attracted to, I understand.
Damaris
But I understand why y'. All.
Caller
Yeah, yeah.
Rory
But I. With Jason Lee, though. Good dude, man. And like I said, met him in LA and exchange was. Was cool. Mutual respect. And he said even though he definitely wanted to come. Come on the show. So. Jason, what's up, bro? We waiting for you, man.
Mall
I think I kind of want Jason Lee to interview Vlad since we're. Since we're on this. This subject.
Damaris
Oh, God.
Mall
Because the same way Dane was trying to figure out why Jason Lee is gay, I would like Jason to ask Vlad why he wants his penetrated, but he's not gay.
Rory
Who wants to penetrate?
Mall
All right, so.
Damaris
Oh, that's what he looks like.
Rory
Come on.
Mall
No, I'm all right. So who's that onlyfans chick? The white girl?
Rory
That Sophie Raines?
Mall
Yeah. Sophie Raines claimed that an NBA player offered $15 million to take her virginity, which she declined. And Vlad said, I'll take him up on that offer for My anal virginity. No LOLs either. No psyche. I was just playing around. And then he did a poll on Twitter because for some reason he didn't understand that the rest of us don't want to have our assholes penetrated by men. And he did a poll on Twitter and said, see. See, guys. 30 of people want their asshole taken for $15 million. So I want Jason to get to the bottom of that. It's not my world. It's not my. My thing.
Damaris
No.
Mall
Unless your freak flag fried nothing wrong if that's your journey, Vlad. I just, you know, I don't understand how you don't understand that the rest of us are not on that type job.
Damaris
15 million ain't a bad number.
Rory
It's definitely not to lose your virginity. I don't know about a man wanting to lose his anal virginity for 15 years. I'm not even speaking to that. But Sophie Rain makes a lot of money on OnlyFans.
Damaris
I feel like Vlad probably makes a lot of money, too. I feel like if his number was higher, more people would understand him.
Mall
Vlad is definitely rich.
Damaris
Yeah.
Mall
But even if I was poor, I'm not letting a man penetrate me with his dick into my ass.
Damaris
What would you do?
Mall
No, I just, like, want to make that very clear.
Damaris
What would you do if your son was at home crying alone in the bedroom and forth. Cause he's hungry.
Mall
Keep smoking crack. You will.
Rory
Nah, you better put on his shy and get with me. Come out here and get it in the streets with me.
Mall
You mean everyone got to pull their
Rory
own weight around here? Yeah. What?
Damaris
That's crazy. You want to take a little tickle? That's crazy as tickle. Yeah, a little tickle for your child to eat.
Rory
You crazy as hell. No, I can never look at my child the same, knowing I let a man anally penetrate me while he eating steak. What I had to do for that steak. You crazy as hell. No, I could never sleep again.
Mall
Like, it's not even. That's not even blood money.
Rory
That's just shitty. Yeah, that's butt money.
Mall
That's butt money. Yeah.
Rory
Like, I gotta sit with the little. You know when you got a hemorrhoid and you can't sit on. Sit down all the way, get the little.
Damaris
It's not that bad. Like, it's this.
Rory
How you know.
Mall
Wait, wait. Oh, I didn't want to go there. Whoa. That's why when Demerit's like, I take the 15.
Rory
I'm like, like, how you hot, baby D?
Damaris
I was.
Rory
How do you know?
Damaris
I Was literally about to say, I have gay friends. They have never.
Rory
Nah, we're not putting this on the gay friends. You the gay friend again.
Damaris
They have never complained, like, especially for your first time. Like, I'm. It's fine.
Mall
Okay.
Damaris
And most of these dicks is little anyway. You've taken shits bigger than that, you'll be all right.
Mall
But typically, a gay person wants a dick in their ass. That's probably why. It's not that bad. It would be rape with me.
Damaris
Well, yeah, but not if they're paying. Accept the money is not rape, man.
Rory
Listen, where's Pride? We were just talking about. We started the top of the show with Pride.
Damaris
Pride is the devil. Pride is the devil.
Rory
Sophie rain turning out 15 million to lose her virginity. Now I get it. Sophie Rain is probably the top five earner on OnlyFans, so she's making. She's made well, more than $15 million on OnlyFans. She's made over 100 million on it on OnlyFans, according to AI. 15 million to just lose your virginity.
Mall
Also, paying 15 million is to have shitty sex is weird, too.
Rory
Yeah, like, I want to know who the player was.
Damaris
A sick person who likes. Probably likes kids, but, you know, there's that.
Rory
Paying 15 million to have sex with a virgin is crazy. Just offering that is crazy. 15 million. Like, what are you going. It's not going to be enjoyable for you. 1500. Didn't have the best sex of your life? Go to college?
Mall
Or is she just, like. Is she one of those that, like, just has bikini pics on there?
Rory
She gets topless? No, I think she shows. She gets naked, but I don't think she, like, is.
Mall
Nothing's inserted.
Rory
Yeah, I don't think she's doing that. I don't think she does that.
Mall
Okay.
Rory
She gets naked on Only Fans, but, Yeah, I don't. 15 million. I mean, listen, she popping her because we had to turn that down. That just speaks to the amount of money she's making.
Mall
Or unlike Vlad, she's setting a precedent, and it needs to be more than $50 million. She said no to 15. Oh, she didn't say no.
Rory
She's at the auction.
Mall
I think she just put that price out there just to set.
Rory
This is.
Mall
This is the.
Rory
Or 30 maybe.
Damaris
Maybe she values her virginity and wants to lose it to somebody she likes and not just.
Rory
Maybe that can be a thing, too. Yes, but come on. Yeah. 15 million for your virginity. You ain't gonna be like, I am sacred. I am keeping it. I mean, you would have Put your ankle on your earlobe so fast.
Damaris
Not if you can make 101 and 1 million from not anybody.
Rory
I'm saying if you didn't. If you weren't making 100 million on OnlyFans, and the NBA player deemed you. He knew you was a virgin. He said, yo, I'll give you. I'll buy you $15 million in the morning.
Damaris
To take my virginity?
Rory
Yes.
Damaris
You saying no as an adult now that I know what I know?
Rory
No, you don't know nothing.
Damaris
Oh, because I'm a virgin? No. No.
Rory
You saying no?
Damaris
No. But now that I'm a woman, I've been dealing with men for free for so long.
Rory
I'm saying, you, you, you. You just a woman. You never had sex.
Damaris
I would say no.
Rory
I don't believe that I would.
Damaris
Because women, we're taught when we're growing up, we're taught that virginity is some, like, sacred Beau taught that. So losing it in a prostitution way is just like. As someone who knows nothing.
Mall
She's a prostitute.
Damaris
Well, yeah, that's her. He's asking me.
Mall
Okay.
Damaris
Losing it, like, in such a prostituting way, like, we would be like, oh, my God, no. We would feel so dirty. But women who have been having sex for a long time and realize that dealing with men for free is not it.
Rory
Yeah, of course, baby D. If A had 15 million sitting in your account and it said pending, and all you had to do was let that hit, and that 15 is in your.
Damaris
You're asking me with my knowledge that I have now I'm saying, yeah. You're asking someone who's a virgin and didn't know, doesn't know any better.
Martha Stewart (advertisement)
No.
Damaris
Me as a.
Sonesta Travel Pass (advertisement)
No.
Mall
Does she have $100 million?
Rory
No. She got a hundred dollars to her name in her savings.
Damaris
Oh, that's just. Come on now.
Mall
Yeah.
Rory
And I'm saying a woman like that, that has. She ain't. She got to work. She's living check to check.
Mall
Oh, yeah.
Rory
She's And a just be like, y. 15 million I'm tomorrow.
Damaris
But people think virginity is worth so much more than it is.
Rory
I agree.
Damaris
Women, it ain't that big a deal. They think that virginity is worth so
Rory
much more than it not worth more than 15 million. I tell you that 15m.
Mall
See how much mine cost. A girl brought a $12 bottle of Be Grape over.
Rory
Yeah.
Mall
That's all. That's all it took. For me, that's what. That's what got me out of my draws.
Rory
15 million. I wish I was a virgin and a Only fans model was like, yo, I ain't going to lie right now. 15 million for me to sit on it. And I'm like, no, I'm. I could never.
Damaris
But you're a boy. You're not. You're not raised in the same way. Your. Your virginity is not like, valued. You're a.
Rory
My virginity is not value. Are you telling me my virginity is not valued? I value my virginity.
Mall
Glad was raised better than.
Damaris
Than us.
Mall
That's what you're saying.
Damaris
His ass still intact.
Rory
Wait, wait, I'm not saying like ass play. I'm talking about like a. A woman just wanted to have sex with me because I was a virgin.
Damaris
Yeah, no, that and she's sick too. People who just want to have sex with people for virgin because they're virgins are sick people.
Rory
I believe that.
Mall
I believe that's weird.
Damaris
You want to have sex to the closest thing you can to a child without it being illegal.
Rory
There's something weird there for sure.
Damaris
Who search up barely 18 on Pornhub pedophiles.
Rory
Barely 18.
Mall
That's a. I think anyone that names porn period has a little weird going on. Like Busty Barely Legal on every videos. Like, why does. Why is Barely Legal the number one thing right here?
Damaris
Well, they just knows the. They know the algorithm. Yeah, we title YouTube not because we will watch it, but we know what people will watch. That's how we title our.
Rory
It's no.
Damaris
An algorithm.
Rory
We gotta. We gotta name this episode Barely Pot. Barely Pardon? Just to get the Barely the Barely crowd. It is Busty Barely Pardon.
Mall
It is funny too, when you've seen like a porn star that you have watched for years and like three years pass and it's. The video is like, yeah, I just turned 18. I've been watching you for five years.
Rory
Yeah, cut it out.
Damaris
Hey, man, people falling for it.
Rory
They do. Another one is when they be saying that it's their stepmom.
Mall
I'm like, that's sick.
Rory
Like, what is it?
Mall
That whole genre.
Rory
Even I know it's not real.
Damaris
It's like my brother Step all the. Yeah, because people. And they only put step because incest is illegal. Cuz if they could title my mom, people would watch Sickos. People are sick, y'. All.
Rory
Why y.
Damaris
Why y' all be surprised? Did you call your boy and yell in his ear for breaking the record? Like, did you like FaceTime him and scream?
Rory
Nah, he said to make that. He said to make that a sound. Put that on the soundboard, though. You got to put that on the
Damaris
soundboard the year or the echo Last peach got that down pack. He could like, mimic it perfectly. He sounds just like you.
Rory
Yeah, we got to get the year on the. On the soundboard. But no, I did congratulate him on. On, you know, obviously breaking the record and having 12 albums charting this week. It was just a, you know, just quick conversation of congrats on everything, man.
Mall
And which was the Michael Jackson record that he broke?
Rory
Most solo artists with the most number one has a Hot 100.
Damaris
Yeah. Most Billboard hits.
Mall
Oh, well, congrats. I mean. Yeah.
Damaris
Yeah.
Mall
That's crazy. Congrats to him.
Rory
Should have broke it last year when he. When he dropped what did I Miss? But, you know, they did some funny shit with it debuted at number two, I think. What did I miss last year? Wrestling radio was.
Mall
But wasn't it, like. Wasn't Taylor doing something that week or something?
Rory
No, they did something because I think he released it on a Friday. He released it on the 4th of July. I don't know what day that was. What day that was last year.
Damaris
Okay.
Rory
But radio did some funny shit saying when he, you know, debuted, it was. I don't know. It was some funny shit. So it debuted at number two last year.
Mall
But yeah, I think that's. That's great for him and that's a crazy, crazy stat for an artist. But I don't know, maybe it's more the Internet's reaction that I just don't care. Like, people dissecting which. What had collabs and like, is this a true number? Like, I. I don't.
Damaris
I don't.
Mall
I don't care that much because congrats.
Damaris
So that people know. They were saying. Because the majority of Drake's number ones have features. Either he's a feature or somebody else is a feature and he's the lead artist. And then Michaels are like damn near all of them, I think. I think except for. I think one or two.
Mall
Maybe Paul McCartney or just.
Damaris
Yeah. Are just him. So they're saying, that's not fair. I'm like, it doesn't matter. People. Like, I'm like, if you want to
Rory
look at it, I mean, yeah, he's still gonna.
Mall
Drake comes from the generation where a listers collaborate. Like, that's the era of music now.
Rory
Yeah.
Mall
Jay Z's first number one was Alicia Keys singing on the hook, which is ridiculous to me. But yeah, Beyonce has collab number one. Like it's we're era of collabing. Whereas Mike, those pop stars typically didn't do that. So I Don't.
Damaris
Yeah.
Mall
Matters.
Rory
Yeah. I don't. You know, however you want to dissect and break it down, I don't really care. I think the fact that he has 12 albums that are charting this week, to me, is. Is what I really look at. Like, that's fucking insane. He released 43 songs, 42 of them in the top hot 100. Insane. Like, shit like that is what I'm looking at. Like, that's just. We've never seen that before, especially from an artist that is a. A. A rapper first. Yeah. We obviously know Drake makes more than just rap music, but he's a rapper first, and we've never seen a rapper be able to do that. And we probably won't ever see that again.
Mall
Yeah. I mean, again. Happy for him. Congrats. I was a little more stoked for the Lizzo Chili's collab. I thought that was a cooler stat.
Damaris
They're collabing.
Mall
She's now the face of Chili's.
Damaris
That's fire.
Mall
Get your. They needed the rebrand because they were smoking back in the day with Chili's baby back ribs. Then they did the Austin Powers collab. Like, Chili's does good brand partnerships, but it's been a while. Lizzo's got to bring Chili's back.
Damaris
I think that's fire.
Rory
Chili's had a great fried ice cream they used to do. I don't know if they still do it.
Damaris
That's big bag this morning.
Rory
It's Chili's. That's what we're here for. We think we here to eat healthy.
Damaris
I've never been to a Chili's.
Rory
You've never been to Chili's?
Damaris
I've never been to a Chili's.
Rory
How you never been to Chili?
Damaris
I've just never been to one.
Rory
You gotta, Baby D. We gotta go to Chili's.
Mall
Do we?
Rory
Yeah.
Damaris
Peach is forcing me to go to Applebee's for the Don Pulio.
Rory
I think you got to get the Don Pulio.
Mall
I think Chili's has Lizzo. Applebee's has to get Peach.
Rory
Yeah.
Mall
Like, for sure. Peach has to be the face. Applebee.
Rory
You're not gonna get the Don Pullio.
Damaris
He's making me go with him.
Rory
Yeah, come.
Damaris
You gotta get him and Alex. They're making me go to get a Don Julio, which is an inflatable pool full of Don Julio Margarita or something.
Mall
Going to the one across from Barclays. Like, that one's lit. Like, they be hoes in there.
Damaris
Yeah, but they be young. They all from Liu. I know Cuz when I was a young ho from Liu, that's where you was at.
Mall
No, but Chili's, food wise, I think it's better than. Than Applebee's. I think Lizzo's gonna whip them back in shape and that's going to be the spot.
Rory
Now, Chili's definitely has better food than Applebee. Really? Yeah.
Damaris
I mean, Applebee's food sucks. He got mad at me for sending it back, but it sucks.
Rory
It depends.
Mall
You're just sending something back that they're just gonna put back in a microwave.
Rory
Yeah.
Mall
And they're not gonna. They're not gonna make it any better.
Damaris
But it'll be hot. That's. And that's fine. If you're gonna feed me some. Some dog, feed me hot dog. Don't feed me mid lukewarm dog.
Rory
There's nothing worse than biting into something you think is hot and it's cold in the middle. Oh, yeah, that's the worst.
Mall
Every Hot pocket, I'll be feeling like
Rory
somebody ordered that at another table and they sent it back back. Yeah. And then you order right after that person, you're like, oh, no, it's right there. He ain't even touch it. And they just send it to you like, nah, I don't want that. Yeah, my food got to be hot.
Mall
I know, man. We might need to do the Don pulios for Game 1, NBA Finals at Applebee's across from the Barclays, so we could really on them.
Rory
NBA Finals at Applebee's?
Mall
Yeah. Get us a couple Tom Pullios.
Damaris
Sounds like hell, yeah.
Rory
That sounds wild.
Mall
You wouldn't watch the game at Applebee's?
Rory
No. Oh, I wouldn't.
Mall
Peach. I'm with you, man. That's my type of environment for a game.
Rory
It's just gonna be two. It's gonna be two packed. Yeah, it's gonna be two packed at Applebee's. Two packed.
Damaris
I keep trying to get my.
Mall
That's a sick spot, though, for everyone.
Rory
You gotta get there early.
Mall
Like, is it gonna be packed?
Damaris
Yeah, it's packed every time.
Mall
With the amount of bars I'm trying to think. There's Applebee's on Jamaica Aven and by Barclays Center. I don't know if there's other ones. There's so many bars that people would go to before they go to Applebee's in that area, fam.
Rory
I was in Toronto for one of the games when they was in the finals, and I was at a restaurant that it was. It was a nicer restaurant than Applebee's. And that shit was packed. I paid the bartender to hold a seat at the bar for me. Like that's how packed. So Applebee's, New York, the Knicks in the finals. Definitely gonna be packed.
Mall
Can you imagine if BBQs was still open in the Bronx and we were in the finals?
Rory
Oh, hell no. I think that's why they closed BBQs
Mall
in the Bronx for a regular season game.
Rory
Yeah, they knew Jalen was going to. They was like, you know what? This is the year we got to shut this shit down.
Damaris
Now are they still open in Times Square?
Mall
I think so. And The 1 on 23rd I think is still open. Pardon the local right now, but all of that.
Damaris
Oh, BBQ.
Mall
No, BBQs for the games is going to be crazy.
Damaris
That's insane. Yeah, but I like that energy, though. Like where me and Peach go to watch the game. Like, it don't be too packed, but it be. You know, it's energy.
Rory
I'm saying that. But I'm going uptown to Harlem to one of the handball courts to watch it. And that's probably gonna be the same type of environment. It's gonna be packed a bunch of in there, like in the park. But that environment is kind of cool outside in the park at dark. And the handball court is the projector. Like, that's a cool environment for the playoffs. Yes.
Mall
For the finals. I think I'll be too nervous. I'm gonna be a nervous wreck. I might need to be in my house with the lights off by myself. Not even in my living room. Like my bedroom tv, definitely doing a
Rory
seance around a candle seance around the tv. Like, what are you doing?
Mall
You know, in the beginning of Belly, when young DMX does his seance shit,
Rory
you gotta do that.
Mall
I'm gonna do the same thing with Josh Hart in the.
Rory
I think if we go back to. I don't know when we. We spoke about it. Peas. But I did say I had the Knicks walk into the finals this year.
Mall
You did.
Rory
Cause everybody was hurt. Like Indiana was hurt.
Mall
We were saying, yeah, we should have, and thank God we did. But I don't know, man, I'm excited. I just want to leave it at that.
Rory
Listen, now that it's finally here, I'm not gonna lie. Like, it's like, oh, shit, the Knicks are in the finals. We may not ever see this again. It's been 27 years since the last. Ryan wasn't even born.
Mall
Solar eclipse.
Rory
The last time the Knicks were in the finals. Finals.
Mall
None of us were born the last Time they won it.
Rory
Well, yeah, last time they won it, none of us were born. But now that they're back, the Knicks are back in the finals. How are we feeling? Do we want OKC or do we want San Antonio?
Mall
I don't. This series because we're recording this on a Thursday. Right now it's three.
Rory
The answer is okc.
Damaris
Rory.
Rory
We want okc. We don't want.
Mall
They both looked amazing and they both look shitty. I don't know.
Rory
You do not want to see Wimby come into the Garden, bro.
Mall
We did okay against the spurs this season.
Rory
I don't give a fuck what they did during the regular season. Season. The Knicks do not want Wimy to walk into the Garden for the finals. You don't want that. You don't want.
Mall
Just let Mitch step on his toe one time. Just step on to.
Rory
I take my chances with okc, you know, I think we throw some guys at Shay.
Mall
Well, he kind of looks like shit
Rory
right now, so throw Josh at him, you know, og. You know, put some bodies on him. I think Jalen fares better, you know, against OKC than. And having to deal with de' Aaron Fox and Stephon Castle and those guys over in San Antonio. I just think that it's a. I wanna see a great series, though. So I don't want it to be easy for the Knicks. I don't want it to sound like that. I don't want it to be easy. I wanna see a great finals. I hope it goes seven games.
Mall
I hope it doesn't.
Rory
I hope it goes seven. I want it to go seven.
Mall
That's fine. I hope it goes four.
Rory
No, I want the Knicks to win, but I want it to be like a seven game. Like, I want us every day to come in here, like, what the fuck? Like, I want it to be one of those series. I want the Knicks to win, but I just don't think that. I don't. I don't think we want to see Wimby come into New York for a championship.
Mall
I'm 36. Blood pressure is now a thing. Because I'm at this age. I don't need seven games. Give me an easy four.
Rory
Nah, that's.
Mall
And let's go right to the parade.
Rory
That's too easy. Set for another four game sweep. It's not. It's no fun in that. I wanted to go seven and we sitting down like, what the fuck?
Mall
But what if we win?
Rory
If the Knicks win?
Damaris
Scared of New York, bro.
Mall
What if we win?
Rory
I'm going to the parade.
Mall
What?
Rory
I'm going to the parade.
Mall
The parade? That night? Yeah.
Rory
I'm going to the parade. You gotta go like Juve.
Mall
Yes.
Rory
You gotta go to the Knicks parade. Like I said, we may not. We may not ever see this again. I'm scared in our lifetime, we may not have. Amara might be at three Knicks parades in her lifetime. Like you and I, Roy, you may not ever see the same.
Mall
But it could shift. It could shift the Knicks culture. We could be a winning franchise now.
Rory
I mean, I hope so. I hope so. Definitely a playoff. A playoff contender team every year now. But getting to the finals, you know, with healthy teams in the east, and you know how much it takes to get to the final. Everybody has to stay healthy. Everybody. You know, it's a lot that goes into a team making the finals. So for the Knicks to be in the Finals, days of rest. Because the west is not settled yet. So they got days to rest, no injuries. As a Knicks fan, this is like the perfect scene.
Mall
That's why I've been so scared. The whole playoffs. Everything's been perfect.
Rory
Yeah, exactly. So, you know, it's like that. It's that. It's the. It's the nick trauma and, like, I
Mall
don't even mind the idol time. I used to be scared of idle time because we have people like JR Smith who's gonna be drunk every fucking night in New York City. Like, they're all at home with their wives, chilling.
Rory
Yeah, yeah.
Mall
It's nerve wracking.
Rory
It's the nick trauma, man. It's like we all collectively feel like something has to happen, something has to go wrong.
Mall
Cat is really playing for his job. I mean, he's had a great playoff series. You think if we lose, they try to break up the team for Greek freak.
Rory
I mean, anytime you can get Giannis, you do what you gotta do. But I don't see the Knicks. I don't see the necessity in it. They got to the like, what can you like, you know what I'm saying? They got there, this team got to the Finals. Like, you get Giannis and get back to the finals. And then what? You know what I'm saying? It's like, all right, y' all just did that. Like. So I don't know if the Knicks break. I think that the culture that they have now, the camaraderie, you know, Giannis is the league MVP champion. I think you bring him in. We start at the top of the episode with this ego. Does him and Jalen get along, you know what I'm saying? I think it's just so many different dynamics that you have to think about going after a guy like Giannis. I just don't know if it's necessary for the Knicks to make that move. Think what they got right now. If it ain't broke, don't fix it, man.
Mall
Man, I think I would actually cry if they won. I'm not even joking.
Rory
Cry if they win.
Mall
Like, if they lose, you gonna cry? No, Used to. I'm. I'm numb to them losing. That's.
Rory
That's another day to me if they win. Like, if the clock is running down and the knicks are up 10 with like 30 seconds left and it's like for the. Is crying.
Mall
I've never cried cuz of a sp. I, like, like, really would think I'm gonna cry.
Rory
What? You have to cry as a New Yorker, you have to cry. We're watching the Knicks. Like, I'm not even a die hard Knicks fan like that. And I know I'll cry like, yo, they about to do it. Like, the Knicks have won a championship. That's insane. Like, that is something that every Knick fan is like, this is like, nah, this can't be happening. This is crazy. No, it's insane. So if they up like, yes. And it's like the game like this is. They won 3, 10 seconds and they're up. It's like, bro, the Knicks won the championship is. Grown men are crying. Yeah, that's a fact. New Yorkers are crying.
Mall
They had. It has to be a national holiday for that parade, though. Like, there's no way people can go to work that day.
Rory
No, no, no, no. You can't go to work on in the Knicks parade. No Yankees like we used to. That we used to. The Yankees winning, even though it's been some years, but it's like the Knicks win a championship.
Mall
Come on.
Rory
It's been.
Mall
We got to do the parade on the FDR. Like, not even on 8th AB or anything.
Rory
52 years. Like, come on, man. You got to celebrate that. Definitely.
Damaris
Mom Donna Stan.
Rory
Who? Mom Donna. What?
Damaris
Mom Donna Stand. You ever heard of that?
Rory
No. What is that?
Damaris
They saying it's Mom Donnie, like, but we Stan him.
Mall
Is that what you're saying?
Damaris
Like, Afghanistan, like, it's mom.
Rory
They call New York Mom. Donna. Stan. Oh, my God. I gotta move. I gotta move out of New York. I gotta get out of here.
Damaris
That New York Energy is back, man. The Knicks is up. Up is good. It's a good energy in New York. Well, I know you don't really Go outside like that. But the energy is. The energy is good, man. I think this gonna be one of them New York summers.
Mall
If we win, I promise you every supermarket not by choice is going to be free that night. Looting will be happening in the happiest of ways.
Damaris
Who's. Why would y' all do that?
Mall
To celebrate my D said everything's free.
Damaris
He didn't say that.
Rory
I think he ran on that.
Mall
Ran on it.
Rory
I think he almost bought his campaign.
Mall
I got on the bus and they was like 275. What? No.
Rory
I voted for Mom Donnie. I'm good.
Mall
The back door.
Rory
Yeah, back. Back door. I voted for Mom Donnie.
Mall
Mall summer is here and it's time to have my beard shimmering in the sunlight. I don't know if you can notice now. I know you noticed, but it's cool. You can play koi. I have the Baskin Lather growth oil in as far as the beard softener. I'm ready to be outside at the festivals. I don't have a care in the world at this point. Look, look, look at this.
Rory
You ready to shut your head off?
Mall
Look at the growth. Yeah, look at the inches.
Rory
I see you.
Mall
That is because I have the bask and lather in right now. Natural beard growth oil for fuller, thicker facial hair. A blend of vital nutrients to help nourish and increase the blood circulation right to the hair follicles. So you could have this right here. Mo, you could have my red beard if you wanted to.
Rory
Yeah, I gotta start using that.
Mall
Yeah, man. It promotes softening of beard and dandruff reduction. So you could wear a black T shirt and feel completely fine that you're not just gonna be flaky when you walk outside.
Rory
Yeah, that's nasty. That's bad business. We don't need that.
Mall
It's wild.
Rory
And this is also a black owned and family operated brand. Shout out to the CEO, Shayna and her mother. They researched and formulated their own scalp and hair oil to stimulate growth and to retain length. So we want to keep using this product because it is black owned and we appreciate that.
Mall
And no, I use it daily. It's been great. I've struggled with certain beard products. They don't work on my skin with my hair. This has been. It's definitely my favorite beard oil right now for sure.
Rory
Explore viral bestsellers and products of healthier hair of all types from Baskin lather. Go to baskinlathercode.com and use code Rory Mall for 20% off. That's 20% off at bask and lather co.com code Rory Mall
Kalpen (Cal Penn)
hey everyone, it's Cal Penn. I'm the host of Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I am sitting down with Ray Porter, the narrator of Andy Weir's audiobook project, Hail Mary Massive sci fi adventure about survival and science and what happens when you wake up alone, very far from Earth.
Ray Porter
I really had to make a decision because I caught myself getting that frog in my throat and starting to get teary as I'm narrating some of these sections and it's like, okay, yo yo yo, is this it? Indulgent. And I really thought about it. I was like, no. At this point it would kind of be betraying the trust the author and the listener have in telling this story if I don't go through it. But there's places in this book that that deeply, emotionally affected me and I left it on the mic. That's great cuz it served the story. People will say like oh my God, I cried at the end. It's like, yeah dude, me too.
Kalpen (Cal Penn)
Listen to Irsay the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Martha Stewart (advertisement)
This is Martha Stewart from the Martha Stewart Podcast. Ever wonder how to make hosting look effortless? Here's a secret Getting ahead of the mess with new Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep Paper Just lightly wet the counter beforehand so the paper grips and stays in place. Then lay down the Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep paper so drips and spills stay on the paper, not all over your kitchen counter. You can roll out dough, prep a party spread, or cook alongside family. When you're done, cleanup is as simple as lifting the paper and revealing that clean counter underneath. Effortless. You can use it for cooking and baking, prep and even crafting, especially when you need extra working space. Because when the mess is already handled, you can focus on what matters. The food, the people, and the moment. It may look effortless, but now you know. It's Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep paper. Take a tip from me. Wet it, set it, prep it. Done. Make it easy. Make it with Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep paper, available now in the Reynolds scrap aisle and Walmart, Target, Amazon, and Costco.
Reese Witherspoon (advertisement)
Picture this. Me, Reese Witherspoon in London, ordering fish and chips so often they might start wrapping me in paper. I'm traveling with my Wells Fargo Autograph Journey card, so I earn rewards wherever I book. Travel five times points with hotels four times with airlines three times on restaurants and other travel and one point on other purchases. Imagine getting rewarded for eating a toad in the hole. Wait, what is a toad in the hole?
Mall
Visit wells fargo.com autographjourney Terms apply
Sonesta Travel Pass (advertisement)
from coast to coast. Unlock adventure at Red Lion Hotels by Sinesta, where restful, sleep, friendly service and trusted local knowledge are part of every stay. Red lion makes it easy to feel welcomed, comfortable and connected wherever the road takes you. Whether you're traveling for business or pleasure, you can spend less and make more of every trip.
Damaris
Trip.
Sonesta Travel Pass (advertisement)
When you sign up for Sonesta Travel Pass, you'll get our best rates instantly. Go to sinesta.com to book your stay and unlock the best rates with Sonesta Travel Pass. Here today, Rome tomorrow. Join now@sinesta.com terms and conditions apply.
Mall
Before we get out of here. Do we have voicemails?
Rory
You've got mail.
Caller
What's happening? Rory Mo demeris Shout out to y' all Just coming off of listening to the latest Reason episode Shadow Reason. That was an amazing project he put out. Definitely one of my favorites of the year. But let's get into it. You guys brought up Wale in the latest episode and how he was wrongfully left off the hottest one hottest 100 rappers list and you know, it just had me thinking. Obviously it's well documented. Your guys love for Wale and his discography. I'm of that same belief too. Came up listening to him in the blog area and all that, but had me think about how do we feel about a Wale Big Sean versus you know, this is just speculating but you know, obviously they are both contemporaries coming up in the blog area at the same time. Both have phenomenal discographies, commercial and critical success and hits and stuff like that. They definitely both have like at least 20 hits as well as a deep catalog, mixtape catalog to to reach into and features. But how do we feel about that? I'm kind of leaning with Wale taking the W on that. No disrespect to Sean, but you know I've seen both of them live. I feel like Wale's hits ring off a little bit harder and you know, especially when it comes to his features, the R and B back that he can get into. I feel like I see him kind of coming out on top on that. But yeah, let me know what your thoughts are. Peace and love and blessings.
Mall
That's a good question. I mean I think both Wale and Big Sean are underrated as far as hit makers like they do. Both have big hits that I Think people forget about. I'm not saying Wale would wash him, but I don't know if it'd be that close. And I love Sean and I think Sean has crazy record. I think Click will go crazy guap. Bounce back. Like he's got joints that would do really well in A versus Blessings would go up. But Wally has always kept a hit record. Every time he's put out all 12 of his albums. Yeah, like.
Damaris
And they can play songs that their features on, right? Yeah, because I think, I mean like that might be where Click is a good music moves up. Not pass Wally, but he moves up a little bit because Big Sean has a lot of big features.
Mall
He does. And, and not for nothing, like on Click he has a great verse with two of the other greatest rappers of all time. Like he keeps up. I just don't. Those moments, I don't know how crazy they'll be if it's just one quick verse when Wale can do that with no hands. Like Click would go nuts. But if, if w replies with Waka Rosco Dash, no hands and you have. Have 10 other records like that, just chilling.
Damaris
What would be your. Your first 10 if you were Wale?
Mall
That's a good question. Out the gate I would probably. I would maybe even in start with Bad Lotus Flower Bomb Dice, Pineapples. I might do a whole girl set to start the. Before we even get to any of the. The harder records.
Rory
Valet is being shown in a version.
Mall
Well, he is.
Damaris
Wale is. Yes.
Rory
And I fuck with Shawn. But Wale has like those, those records that Rory just named. I think that that's the, you know, that's what separates them. Sean got some dope verses and features too, and big records. But I think when you start getting into that set of just the, the women records, the records that the girls love, I think that Wale separates himself.
Mall
You got got 12 out the gate of just, just those.
Rory
Yeah.
Mall
And I mean even recently, like Poke it out with J. Cole was a really big record years ago. Like I think that does really well in. In Versus. And I mean if they go back to older shit like Nike Boots, I don't know who's listening, how old they are, but Nike Boots was a huge record as well that I think would work in a Versus. Pretty Girls with Gucci Mane was crazy. Like. Yeah. I think Wale gives a lot of artists a hard night.
Rory
Yeah.
Mall
Pause. You got records and that's no slight to Sean, but I'm saying I think Wiley could go up against artists that we say Would do better in versus than a Big Sean would. I think while it gives them a. A very, very long, long versus.
Damaris
I think Big Sean has a bigger advantage if the crowd is full of white people.
Mall
You think so you don't think the whites love Lotus Flower Bomb?
Damaris
I'm not talking about though. I'm not talking about whites love. No, I'm not talking about like your type of white white. I'm talking about like the hip hop whites.
Rory
The 7 11.
Mall
Yeah, but did they. Do they like Bigon or like the.
Damaris
The. The. The whites who go and see ludicrous at the fair?
Mall
Okay, yeah, those.
Damaris
But I think while you might not play, I don't with you.
Mall
If you play that would go crazy
Damaris
if you play that for that's white people's like that.
Mall
That's a hit record.
Rory
That's white people's dreams and nightmares.
Damaris
Yeah, yeah. No dead ass though. Like so.
Mall
I thought Journey was. But never mind.
Damaris
No, that might be white people's nightmares.
Rory
Holy.
Damaris
Oh, no.
Mall
Sweet Caroline. No, the whites, we. We do love. I don't with you. That would go crazy. No matter what. That's going crazy at a versus.
Rory
Yeah.
Damaris
Yeah. And I think.
Mall
I think Blessings would do. Do really good as well. That's a good versus record.
Damaris
Long story short, Wale, when you have a song that people can get married to.
Mall
Yeah. Matrimony, like, like Plano Games should be a. A win for Sean. But if you follow that up with Usher, Matrimony, I don't really know. Yeah, I don't know what we doing there.
Rory
Where's that? Not that I really care, but I just want to see what that record is doing. The record with him and Leon Thomas. Where's that at right now?
Mall
Yeah, watching us with. With Wale and Leon Thomas on rhythmic airplay, Billboard, it's number one hot R B and hip hop, it's at number 14. And then overall it's at 76.
Rory
Okay.
Mall
But again, with pretty much every Wiley single for the last decade, it's like a slow, slow burn. Like they work the record and it takes a few months, but he gets the top 10.
Damaris
It's also very hard for. For the past couple years for. For black music to be in that top three. Them top three top five spots just doesn't happen that often.
Rory
Yeah, but I just want to see. Because that record is. Is incredible. Yeah, I just want to see what it was doing. That's all.
Mall
Yeah, well, yeah, I'm taking Wale in that. That matchup, but I also think Sean gives a lot of people A hard time, too. I don't think Sean's the easiest versus.
Rory
No, not at all.
Mall
At all.
Rory
That's actually a great matchup.
Damaris
I don't think so. So really, I think it's a good matchup because we consider them peers.
Mall
Yeah. Same era, I think.
Damaris
Same era, kind of. And people would assume that they have the same level of success. But that reaches into when we say that W is not as big as he should be because his records, like, be big, but he's not as big as he should be. W has better records, and that's no dis to Sean, because I love Sean song. But, yeah, been more consistent.
Mall
The good music thing, I mean, not to say W didn't have mmg. That wasn't big, but the good music definitely did help and put Sean in rooms and certain opportunities that probably W didn't get with certain records. But also, W's been way more consistent than Sean. Yeah, Sean takes, like, four years off in between albums. W's every year or every other year at minimum. So that's where it's kind of also not fair, too. Like, if you were just doing 2011 versus then. Okay, cool. But their whole career. Yeah. Wiley's just been way more consistent. Let my love with whiz kid go off like, that's. That's a point in verses. Yeah, but no, that was a good question. We have any more voicemails?
Caller
Yo, what's up with the pie? But I got a question for y'.
Rory
All.
Caller
So I miss Shorty for, like, six months, right?
Damaris
Right.
Caller
And whenever she go outside, like, she go ghost. And I don't fuck with that for, like, to me, like, when we're outside, like, talking, it's, like, important to me. But I'm not. I'm not saying, you know, she got to text me for, like, 30 seconds or nothing, you know, it's a little like, oh, I'm going out to this bar. Just made it f. To leave on the way home. Shit like that. Right? Just.
Rory
Just.
Caller
Just something instead of her, you know, going out, not saying she going out. Get into the crib. That mean, like, oh, I was outside. My bad. And like, now, like, we arguing about it. I'm just saying, like, bro, like, I don't want you to tell me everything. Like, just, like, you know what I'm saying? Just, like, let know something, you know, like, you going out, and for the whole night, I don't hear until you at the crib or the next day that that bothered the out of me. Like, I'm probably gonna Say, oh, she, she off on when she outside, which could be true.
Rory
Could be true.
Caller
I don't know. I don't know what she do outside. But like, I'm asking her, like, you know, just meet me halfway. You ain't got to. You ain't gotta. You gotta be in your phone the whole night. Just let. Let know something. You know what I'm saying? So what y' all think? What should I do?
Rory
So who's gonna drag your nuts a little bit, homie?
Mall
Who's gonna tell him?
Rory
Go outside and don't hit her phone. Just go outside. Like if that's how she playing it, all right, let her know this is, this is one on one. Like, it's all right. My ball, nigga.
Mall
Now, I. I don't care if you're in your 20s, 30s, 40s, if a girl goes out and especially if she's drinking and she doesn't text you, you're not the one for her, bro. No, I don't care what age it is. I don't care what age it is. If she's out and she's drunk and she doesn't text you, she's texting somebody else.
Damaris
That's not always true.
Rory
I. Okay, you know what? I like the fact that baby put always.
Damaris
That's not always true.
Rory
It's not always true.
Damaris
Often true.
Rory
It's not always true. True, true, but it's true.
Damaris
Sometimes I only drunk call people who I don't have health, the healthiest relationship with. If we talk all day, every day, and or we see each other all the time. When I walk out with my friends, I'm not talking to you. I talk to you all the time. So when I'm out with my friends, me and my friends are having a ball. The only stipulation that I usually have is that I have to let you know when I get home. I'll let you know. I'm home, I'm safe. You know what I'm saying?
Rory
But other than what if you text, I'm home and it's 5:30 in the morning.
Damaris
Sometimes you get home at 5:30 in
Rory
the morning and sometimes you single too.
Damaris
That also is true.
Rory
Yeah, sometimes you single.
Mall
99% of the time when you get home at 5:30, you're not single.
Damaris
I'm not gonna hold you. But lo, I'm not gonna hold you. Don't you know the craziest thing is, is the nights when I got home at 5:30 in the morning was the most innocent nights that, like, when you get home at 2 o', clock, it's. Cause usually you rushing home to sleep. Something like, are you rushing a yo. Club just closed. We about to 5:30 in the morning. You and your home girls was just doing stupid. Like, you weren't, like, you know, you weren't hoeing. Like, if you hoeing, you don't text. I'm home at 5:30 in the morning. You text you home at 2:00 clock with your bonnet on. Sleep. And then you hang up. All right, babe, get some sleep. Snatch the bonnet off and do what you was about to do. Hypothetically, if you're a cheater, I wouldn't know. I'm not a cheater, but 5:30 in the morning, I was at Sahara one time. 5:30 in the morning, me and Alex go home. 5:30 in the morning,. Sun coming up, we at Sahara listening to unreleased Jay Z and smoking hookah. Do a split to the middle of the floor, fam.
Rory
Go outside, have fun. Act like you single, dog. Like, if that's a constant thing, every time she go out.
Damaris
Yeah, if she, if you've complained about it and she hasn't changed it, she don't respect you. It's a respect thing. Not saying she's doing anything, but she don't respect you. If you're complaining about something and she's, she's not apologizing for it. Like, babe, I really just forgot we were having a time. Yeah. Or because if that's the case, she would be like, well, here, here's my location. You have my location. So I'm not gonna text you because I'm having too much fun, but you have my location.
Mall
So you think the girl that doesn't text him is going to give her location to him?
Damaris
I would do that. But yeah, I don't know about her.
Rory
Imagine having a boyfriend and you like, yo, nod and text you because I was having too much fun. It takes, it takes three seconds to be like, yo, babe, we here, there. Just got to this spot, about to get some drinks and eat.
Damaris
I think that that's corny. Like, if we in. Let's say we live in New York. If we spot hopping, I gotta text you every time I get to a new spot.
Rory
Yeah.
Damaris
Hear my location, track me, watch me. Like a little sim.
Mall
Not necessarily every time you go to a new spot, but a check in. If you leave the house at 8 and it's past midnight, like, yeah, a check in is.
Damaris
Yeah, a check in is fine.
Mall
But I'm not saying every time you go to a new bar, it's like, just got to this location. Like, no, just.
Rory
Yeah, let me let. I need to know where my. Where my woman is at.
Damaris
But he didn't say that that was his girlfri. That he's been dating this girl. When people say that,
Rory
is she dating somebody else? You wanted to date us, that's why.
Mall
Yeah, I think he's just part of the options, that's all.
Damaris
Yeah, you wanted the dates.
Rory
It's tough being in a relationship, man, because you sound like a guy that really like her. He trying to, you know, me. She out.
Mall
I think it's tough. Tougher dating in these situations and being a relationship hypothetically, in the best way. You don't have to worry about that stuff in a relationship because no one's cheating. Cheating when you're dating now. And the access that people have to people. Yeah, bro.
Rory
No one's cheating in a relationship saying
Mall
in the best possible scenario.
Rory
Have you been living the last.
Mall
No, no. I said in the highest form, no one is cheating. So you don't have to worry about that. Dating now there's going to be a 99 chance that the person you're dating is probably talking to three or four other people, which is fine. There's nothing wrong with that.
Damaris
She can't text you because the person footing the bill said next to her words.
Mall
And he. And he already got the night mapped out. Yeah, but that's why dating to me is tougher than the relationship. Because like, you. You have to pretend like you don't like someone too much. Where, like, it's. You're not allowed to say, yo, you can't do that because that's not your girl. But you still feel like that still hurts.
Rory
But you gotta date to get to a relationship. I know.
Mall
I'm just saying that's why the dating process.
Rory
So if he's dating her and she's doing this, how you gonna get to the relationship?
Mall
Yeah. Well, she probably would say, you have to step up.
Rory
Up, step up.
Mall
Women just. Women just say words.
Damaris
Apply pressure.
Rory
Apply. So now when this walk into the spot that you in.
Damaris
My favorite thing. I love that.
Rory
And he choke you.
Mall
That's not what depression.
Damaris
I didn't say apply pressure to my vocal cords. Theoretically. Apply pressure.
Mall
Like I said, he'll get us canceled first.
Rory
Yeah, no, women like that.
Mall
So you inter.
Rory
Women like that. Women like when a.
Mall
In a consensual sexual way. Yes, women do.
Rory
Women like to see their pop up in the spy know. He mad that.
Mall
Oh, that's true.
Rory
Yeah.
Damaris
Depends.
Mall
No, that's true.
Rory
Depends it don't depends. You like that? That's why you giggling.
Mall
Definitely.
Damaris
Like, it depends.
Rory
Like, girl, this just.
Mall
That ego gets fed right away.
Damaris
No, look, I got.
Mall
I got. I got him off his square.
Rory
What it depend on if you popping
Damaris
up, cuz I started an argument with you and you know for sure that I'm just out with my home girls. Fine. If you popping up, cuz I ain't answering and you found me when I wasn't trying to be found. Yeah, that I don't find. No, no, no, that's bad.
Rory
No, it ain't. Why you ain't answering your phone?
Damaris
Don't do that, cuz. Especially if we're not in a relationship. Cuz if we're not in a relationship and you just like, you know we in a relationship. Oh, we in a relationship.
Rory
You ain't answer your phone, cuz, I'm pissed. I'm. I'm pulling up.
Damaris
I mean, that's fine.
Mall
He's applying pressure.
Damaris
But like, if we. If. But you. If we're in a relationship. You applied enough pressure. That's why we're in a relationship.
Mall
But if we're just clearly not enough.
Damaris
If we're just dating, like, if we're just dating. Don't do that. Don't pop up on if. I don't want to be found, don't find me. Me. See, if we're just dating, don't find me.
Rory
Nah, see, I'm.
Damaris
Cuz you might see some you don't want to see, yo.
Mall
Not wanting to be found in some
Rory
you don't want to see, like, me walking through that door while you with that.
Damaris
You.
Rory
Yeah, I walk through. Sit right next to y'.
Damaris
All.
Rory
What's up? Who this?
Mall
Oh, my God.
Rory
Who you from? You from Brooklyn? You got your cousin? Yeah, those my.
Damaris
Don't do that.
Rory
Don't do that.
Damaris
Don't do that with me.
Rory
Yeah, I walk right up. Play with me. Me. You was just in my crib last night.
Damaris
Oh, you hating ass. Don't do that. Don't you a hater. Word about don't do that.
Rory
You got in my crib right now.
Damaris
Don't do that. That's some OD hating. If we not in a relationship, don't come like, nah, she was just with me.
Mall
You old.
Rory
I'm not. I'm not talking to the.
Damaris
Talking to you.
Rory
Yo, you got your. Is in my crib right now. Send that.
Damaris
Send that in. Invisible ink. Don't text me. Don't. Don't say that out loud.
Rory
You bugging. I wish A girl would be in my crib the night before, and if she get dressed, leave, go out with her girl girls and be with another.
Mall
Probably happened before. Probably happened to everyone in this room.
Damaris
Yes, I know what's happened to me.
Mall
Yeah.
Rory
And I. But I ain't never find out.
Mall
No, for sure. I'm just saying it's probably. It's probably happened.
Rory
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. But then if I pop up and
Damaris
I see that, well, then why didn't you make an honest woman out of her? If you like her that much, why you ain't make an honest woman, why you ain't ask her to be yours?
Mall
If you like her, put a ring on it. Not even love. If you like her, yes, no maybe.
Rory
Ring on it.
Damaris
Yes, no, maybe box.
Rory
Put a ring around your eye. If you don't get about this restaurant
Mall
right now, like I said, he's gonna get this guest. He's joking, everyone. He's jok.
Damaris
I don't know. That's. That the dating thing that men do where it's like they feel like you're yours, but they still want to be able to date other people. So it's like, I ain't put no title on it, but. But like, you still belong to me. Yeah. Get the. If we're not in a relationship, it's not signed, sealed, and delivered that we're in a relationship. Please know I'm dating other people. Please know that even when I'm not. Just assume that I am.
Rory
See, with the marriage, you'll be talking all this tough willie. Gangster, right? And the moment you find out a. With another ch. Chick, that's when you start changing your hair color. You start acting like a whole new chick. You come in here, it's like today, but I thought she was like, yo, we in a relationship.
Damaris
If we're in a relationship. If we. If we're in a relationship and I find out they're cheating on me, then
Rory
they're not in a relationship.
Damaris
If we. They're.
Rory
Okay, but even if you're not in a relationship and you find out he talking to another girl, you're gonna be mad.
Damaris
If we're not in a relationship, I'm assuming that you're talking to.
Rory
I assume that, and you still gonna be mad.
Damaris
I'm only mad if I see you spending too much money on him.
Mall
Yeah, it's his money.
Damaris
It's a hierarchy thing. Even when we're dating, I still need to be number one in the hierarchy. If we're just dating, I can't just date you and you got a different favorite. Oh, no, no, no. I can't do that. Even if we're just dating
Mall
number one in his MySpace top eight.
Damaris
Well, if. If I'm brand new, then I can move her over. But if I've been here for a while and I'm not treated and there's a favorite, then I go, I can't, I can't.
Mall
What if she ill?
Damaris
That's ego. I have an ego thing. You said what?
Mall
Like, what if she's ill?
Damaris
That's what's up.
Mall
Okay.
Damaris
It's me though.
Mall
You.
Damaris
Good luck, Charlie.
Mall
When you're dating and you go on another date, do you tell the guy that you're going on a date or you just say you're going out?
Damaris
I said I'm going out. And I. I keep. I don't lie, but I keep dancing around it, so. But if you. If you are hard pressed to know, yeah, I'm going on a date, but I don't. They usually don't do that. Men don't usually want to know certain like that they ask, where you going? I'm going to going out. If I don't say I'm going out with Alex, I'm going out with Alexa, I'm going out with Allison, I'm going out with Rory.
Mall
I'm going.
Damaris
If I don't say who I'm going out with, I just say I'm going out. Heard you. Let me know when you get home.
Rory
Hell, make like they used to, boy, I'll be damn. I'll be damn. You doing what? Sit down.
Damaris
But that's corny. That's corny, ma.
Rory
That's corny. You can't do that. I'm trying to save you from your demise. You gonna go out here and one
Damaris
of these wouldn't be in a relationship with me. If you're trying to save me from my demise.
Rory
Yeah, we're in a relationship.
Mall
He's just trying to give you a large picture.
Damaris
How many you in a relationship with currently?
Rory
Now you going into other.
Damaris
Yeah, exactly. That's how they don't make like me.
Rory
No, sit down, sit down. Have some focus.
Damaris
I'm on with you on twin.
Rory
You ain't got no focus. That's the problem. Your energy, you spreading it too thin.
Damaris
So are you.
Rory
How you don't know that all my focus is right here. No, it's not. How what you missing when I'm lacking? What we lacking in our relationship?
Mall
What you feel like is. Marco.
Rory
What you feel like is lacking.
Damaris
Loyalty is loyalty.
Rory
You don't feel no loyal. Ain't no. Ain't no woman coming to you as a woman. She ain't coming. Ain't no woman coming to you.
Damaris
Just because she ain't coming to me means that she's loyal to you.
Rory
Loyal to you. Don't feel like you lesser than you ain't never been with with me and felt like you lesser than you have
Damaris
never been with me and felt like you was lesser than.
Mall
That's a fact.
Damaris
You wouldn't even know about that if you ain't asked me about. Stop asking me questions.
Rory
No, I'm not asking you nothing. I'm telling you to sit down and relax yourself and focus.
Damaris
Me and him are relaxing. Why would I focus?
Rory
All right, so then go ahead, get your and go with that. And that's how we gonna do that. We gonna do that real easy. You know what? Too much back and forth. Pack your up, get up out of here.
Damaris
Too much back and forth.
Rory
It's too much back and forth. We ain't doing all that. Pack your up, go be free. I want them to go be free. I don't hold nobody against their will. Go be free. Go ahead.
Damaris
But every action is an equal and opposite reaction.
Rory
That's a fact.
Damaris
If I go to call you and you with shorty and you can't answer the phone, guess what? But no, I needed you and you weren't there for me.
Rory
Okay, that's. That's.
Mall
Yeah, but what did you need? Because I hate that. Like what you need at that moment I needed you. Yeah, but like for what?
Damaris
I felt like I wanted to kill myself and use with another bitch.
Rory
Well, if you're going for that, you
Mall
call 1-800-better-HELP LOGIC LOGIC. I got logic number I got you.
Rory
If that you call 1-800- Better-HELP CODE RORY. That's what you do.
Damaris
Yo wanting to kill yourself and you call your. He don't answer. You think, oh my God, now I gotta take everybody with me like a middle aged white man.
Mall
Yeah, back in respect. It's like when women say I needed you and they're like, yo, what? What did you need? My bad. My bad. I need to know the capital of West Virginia.
Damaris
Like if I need the. Are we doing if I need to know the capital of West Virginia. You in your head and another I feel like you disloyal. It don't matter. I needed that game show. Maybe wrote the wrong answer on the mirror the I needed you.
Mall
I was your phone. A friend with who wants to Be a Millionaire Yeah, and you would have.
Rory
She's having game night the crib. And you was her phone friend.
Damaris
Piss me the off with a. Oh,
Mall
well, to that gentleman, I don't mean to be morbid, but yeah, she's probably.
Damaris
She don't like you like that.
Mall
Or she's not girlfriend.
Damaris
But either she do like you like that, but she really just does not know how to compromise. Or she's not girlfriend material. Or she don't like you like that. She texting somebody else. So either way, what you say, Ma?
Rory
Get up out of here. Take your dump her.
Mall
Dump her dumper. Well, new music out right now. An artist I love, Rory Still Be Mine, featuring Black Odyssey and Lucky Day, Available now. Shout out to Tao and Jessica and the entire Tao staff that let us shoot the video there. And Damaris's North Star has an album out right now. Yeah, I can't wait to hear that, big mama.
Rory
Shout out to Lotto postpartum.
Mall
Lotto.
Damaris
Lotto and Mariah, the scientists on the same album. I might explode.
Mall
Nah, but. But they're both in love. Love.
Damaris
Now, Mariah, scientist is always in love, and Lotto has always been in love.
Mall
Yeah, actually, that's true.
Damaris
I'm like, what are you talking about? Her whole entire last album was about being in love. That's why I liked it so much. I'm very interested to hear, I think this next single or the single that comes out, they'll have heard it by now, but that comes out tonight is Lotto and Doja Cat. And I'm actually very interested to hear what that sounds like.
Mall
Yeah.
Rory
When is Doja coming to New York? I think the end of the year. Going tour.
Mall
She's on tour for which album? I thought she already tore that album.
Damaris
She didn't. She took la?
Rory
No, she come to New York the end of this year, I think.
Damaris
Oh, wow.
Rory
Oh, trust me, I know. I marked it on my calendar. I know. I've been wanting to see DOA live.
Damaris
I just need to hear a Tia Tamara live. I want to hear that live so bad.
Mall
But yeah, I'm not mad at Lotto and Sexy Red either.
Rory
That should be good.
Damaris
I am. We heard it already.
Mall
Oh, we did? Yeah, that record came.
Damaris
Oh, no, I'm sorry. That was Glorilla, not sexy. Yeah, I'm sorry.
Rory
Album.
Mall
But I mean, I like. I like the features od Whiz kid
Rory
Tiana on that album.
Damaris
Jelly Roll is going to be interesting.
Rory
Jelly Roll? Jelly Roll.
Mall
But yeah, this is her retirement now.
Rory
This.
Mall
This is her black album, so. Okay, she Bet. What's her birthday?
Rory
Lotto's. I don't know. You think I know Lotto's birthday?
Mall
Well, I mean, we got December 4th to start our black album. I need to know where her is.
Rory
Yeah, December 22nd.
Mall
All right, December 22nd. Second. That better be the intro.
Rory
She got to start with that.
Mall
Yeah, and her mom better be be on the interludes.
Rory
38 special out to 38 special, eight shots. Met the man, Red met the man. I said, I say red man met the man. Dave East Ransom, Busta Rhymes. Some good features on here, man.
Mall
Shout out to Special Anderson pack K Pop's album. I was not aware of that until Ryan put that up there. I did not know we were getting Anderson paak album today. Yeah, but yeah, I'm always here for it. Young Ma Queen the album fire. Freddie Gibbs is putting out an ep. Three songs. I know he's been. He was going to do a deluxe. He's been sitting on record, so I'm happy he's putting out some joints. So RBT Freddy Gibbs EP is out as well. Yeah, this is. This a good music. Oh, Cherry from Toronto. Shout out to Cherry. Love Cherry. She has Mariah Scientist on there as well. Cashco Bing. Cherry's dope. She's. She's definitely one of my. My new favorite R B girlies.
Damaris
Like, she's.
Mall
She's dope.
Damaris
Who you run into first?
Mall
Probably that Rory for sure.
Damaris
Who next?
Mall
Probably Gibbs, then Anderson, then 38, then Lotto.
Damaris
Okay, I'm probably gonna do Rory lotto Young Ma, then probably Anderson.
Mall
Oh, we also get the future in Tyler Record, which I think is a perfect pairing. Supposed to be the World cup theme song. So it's already, you know, I'm sure been tested through the roof.
Damaris
Say hi to Netflix, Zip. Come say hi to Netflix or zip here.
Rory
What's up, you fly bum ass? What's the problem? Mad traffic.
Mall
Yeah, yeah, it was extra traffic. Is something going on in the city? It took me forever to get here. It's mad long just now.
Rory
Like a whole life out, that's what. Should never take that long. It's nice out this thing. Weather.
Damaris
Don't look at my purse. Yo.
Rory
Think it's outside. What you got in there, baby D?
Damaris
Don't worry about it.
Mall
All right, well, we're gonna get out of here. About to have zip on Patreon, where we're going to discuss the complex 50 greatest New York City rappers. I have so much to say, so many questions. Shout out to our guy Jordan over at complex. He is one of the credited writers on that. And boy, did we have a back and forth.
Rory
Jordan, I need to know how much how much arguing you did on the during the compilation of this list.
Mall
No, I know how much arguing I did with him yesterday.
Rory
Yeah, this list is absolutely crazy.
Mall
Yeah. So on Patreon right now you can hear our breakdown of The Complex Top 50 New York City rappers where they have Foxy Brown like over Jadakiss or something.
Rory
All right, we'll talk to y' all soon. Be safe, be blessed. I'm that he's just Ginger. That's Baby D.
Kalpen (Cal Penn)
Hey everyone, it's Kel Penn. I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast, Hearsay, The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode, I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears. Listen to Earsay, The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.
Mall
Paramount plus is now the home of all your BET favorites.
Damaris
What? Yes.
Caller
With all new episodes of Tyler Perry's Divorce.
Damaris
Sisters you've always liked, a little drama,
Mall
plus a whole new world of movies like Gladiator 2.
Rory
Now I will control an empire original
Mall
series like the Shy.
Damaris
Just make sure we protect each other.
Mall
And live sports like ufc. Welcome to the history books. New home, same family.
Caller
Your BET favorites are now on Paramount. Subscribe now.
Damaris
Okay. Laundry stinks. Literally. I mean, you could just keep buying new under underwear. Not that I've ever done that. Or maybe sort your clothes into piles based on how re wearable or filthy they are. Or just use arm and hammer Deep clean. It's made for real life stinks and stains. So even if you don't do laundry, the quote right way deep clean will knock it out. I mean it is from the number one liquid detergent brand that tackles more loads than any other. Come clean with arm and hammer. Deep clean. Number one claim based on total wash loads sold.
Martha Stewart (advertisement)
This is Martha Stewart from the Martha Stewart Podcast. Ever wonder how to make hosting look effortless? Here's a secret. When prepping for cooking and baking, get ahead of the mess with new Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep paper. Just lightly wet the counter so the paper grips lay it down and drips and spills stay on the paper paper, not on your counter. Cleanup is as simple as lifting it away to reveal clean counters. Effortless it is thanks to Reynolds Kitchens countertop prep paper. Wet it, set it, prep it, done available in the Reynolds Wrap aisle at Walmart, Target, Amazon and Costco.
Damaris
This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.
Release Date: May 29, 2026
Hosts: Rory, Mal, and Damaris
Podcast: iHeartPodcasts and The Volume
The 500th episode of New Rory & MAL, titled "Rapplebee's," delivers a highly engaging, off-the-cuff session full of playful banter, music and festival talk, relationship debates, and signature unfiltered takes on cultural happenings. The trio spend most of the episode trading personal anecdotes, breaking down hip-hop news (including Drake breaking a Michael Jackson chart record), discussing the NYC energy around the Knicks reaching the NBA finals, and debating food chains like Chili’s versus Applebee’s. The episode also includes listener voicemails, including a light-hearted but insightful Wale vs. Big Sean Versus battle fantasy.
Timestamps: 03:07 – 08:44
Timestamps: 07:49 – 13:32
Timestamps: 15:34 – 17:20
Timestamps: 17:21 – 24:38
Timestamps: 24:39 – 29:02
Timestamps: 29:42 – 32:03
Timestamps: 33:32 – 44:03
Timestamps: 39:33 – 45:05
Timestamps: 45:13 – 48:33
Timestamps: 48:34 – 51:53
Timestamps: 52:12 – 59:06
Timestamps: 64:45 – 86:13
Timestamps: 87:00 – 91:23
The episode is classic Rory & MAL — irreverent, self-effacing, sharp (sometimes wild) in their references, deeply New York, culturally current, while weaving in personal vulnerability and community. Language is playful but real, jumping from jokes and loud laughter to honest life and music insights. The banter is quick-fire, making it always engaging for both regular fans and curious newcomers.
Episode 500 is a celebratory, chemistry-rich ride from the trio, exploring everything from the mundane (feet and chain restaurants) to the most intimate taboos and headline music news. The episode reads like a love letter to New York, music, and the evolving chaos of modern adulthood — with the kind of hilarity and honesty only New Rory & MAL can deliver.