Moment 162. Small Steps Build Big Confidence - No Bullsh!t Leadership

Summary4 min read

No Bullsh!t Leadership: Moment 162. Small Steps Build Big Confidence

Host: Martin G Moore
Date: March 1, 2026

Episode Overview

In this short "Moments with Marty" episode, Martin G Moore tackles the pervasive issue of confidence gaps in leadership. He encourages leaders to confront their weaknesses head-on, explaining why small, deliberate steps are the key to building lasting confidence. Moore dispels common advice to "just focus on your strengths," sharing candid insights from his own leadership journey and offering tangible steps for listeners facing their own performance gaps.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Reality of Leadership Weak Spots

Almost Every Leader Has Them: Moore opens by normalizing the experience of feeling out of one's depth, and the confidence drain that follows.
The Cost of Hiding Weaknesses: Rather than addressing shortcomings, some leaders opt for bravado or defensiveness, which ultimately consumes energy and worsens the problem.
- "It takes a huge amount of energy to present an image to the world that's inconsistent with what's really happening on the inside." (01:29)

Three Problems with Only Focusing on Strengths

Moore counters the popular "just build on your strengths" mantra, identifying three critical flaws:

Career-Limiting Weaknesses:
- "What if that weakness is actually preventing you from advancing in your career?... You'll just get bitter and twisted when you're constantly overlooked for promotion and can't understand why." (02:36)
Unknown Blind Spots:
- Leaders may have damaging weaknesses they're unaware of — and no opportunity to fix unless they're told.
- "If you're unaware of something, you don't have an opportunity to fix it. And in the meantime, the negative impact you have on your team could be devastating." (03:02)
Confidence Erosion:
- Ignoring known weaknesses undermines self-confidence and can affect overall performance.
- "If you know you have a failure in performance or behavior, it's going to dent your confidence... it flows through to every other area of your performance." (03:20)

Building Confidence: The Simple Process

Start Small:
- Moore encourages leaders to focus on a single, manageable first step rather than being daunted by the distance to mastery.
- "Identify your first step. No more than that... If you think about how far away you are from mastery, you will never even begin." (04:02)
Consistency Over Time:
- Take the first step, then repeat the process — each small success builds momentum.
- "Commit to taking that first small step and then rinse and repeat. Your confidence will grow and as it does, you'll be motivated to do more." (04:40)
Immediate Psychological Benefits:
- Confidence starts to build even before major results are seen, reinforcing a positive feedback loop.

Personal Example: Mastering Critical Skills

Moore relates his own experience:
- Skills like negotiation and feedback conversations weren't innate; he developed them incrementally.
- "I use this technique to attain mastery in negotiation, in feedback conversations, in dozens of critical leadership disciplines. I wasn't born with these skills and no one coached me through the process. I just committed to doing the reps." (05:05)

Classic Wisdom

Martin shares a famous quote:
- "As Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu said, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." (05:22)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

"It takes a huge amount of energy to present an image to the world that's inconsistent with what's really happening on the inside." — Martin G Moore (01:29)
"If you're unaware of something, you don't have an opportunity to fix it. And in the meantime, the negative impact you have on your team could be devastating." — Martin G Moore (03:02)
"If you think about how far away you are from mastery, you will never even begin." — Martin G Moore (04:02)
"The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." — Lao Tzu, quoted by Martin G Moore (05:22)

Timestamps for Important Segments

00:25 — Introduction to “Moments with Marty” and the week’s focus on confidence gaps
00:50 — Why bravado and defensiveness are counterproductive
02:20 — Problems with only building on strengths
04:00 — The process: Identify and take the first achievable step
05:05 — Moore’s personal testimonial of building confidence and skills
05:22 — Lao Tzu's wisdom on beginnings

Further Resources

Episode Mention: For specific scripts and practical tools on leadership confidence, see [Episode 276: Building Leadership Confidence]. (Link in show notes.)

Takeaway

Martin G Moore delivers a practical, energizing message: Leadership confidence is not innate; it’s built, step by small step. The hardest part is starting — and once the first little win is achieved, bigger wins soon follow. Moore’s advice: Drop the facade, confront your weak spots, and lean into incremental improvement for career-changing confidence.

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Transcript2 lines

[00:02]
A
Welcome to the no Bullshit Leadership Podcast. In a world where knowledge has become a commodity, this podcast is designed to give you something more access to the experience of a successful CEO who has already walked the path. So join your host, Martin Moore, who will unlock and bring to life your own leadership experiences and accelerate your journey to leadership excellence.
[00:25]
B
Welcome to Moments with Marty, your short, sharp shot of leadership insight to help you to stay on track between our weekly episodes of the no Bullshit Leadership Podcast. Every leader has at least some weak spots and performance gaps. You've probably experienced this yourself, and if you have, you'd know that when you're out of your depth, it saps your confidence no matter how deeply you try to bury it. There's a bunch of ways you can deal with a weak spot, but pretending it's not an issue by doubling down on your arrogance or bravado is not the way to do doesn't help anyone, least of all you. It actually makes matters worse. It takes a huge amount of energy to present an image to the world that's inconsistent with what's really happening on the inside. And the longer you try to keep up the facade, the more intently you're going to focus on protecting it. I'm sure you've all come across leaders who are extremely sensitive to criticism. Often it's because you've unintentionally exposed one of their weaknesses, one that they may have been trying to hide for years. If you don't face your blind spots, then eventually they'll become a source of fear and paranoia. This is why I can't encourage you strongly enough to focus on improving your confidence. Now, I know a few people who are going to tell you not to focus on fixing your weaknesses, but instead to to focus on building your strengths. Well, you know, that's not terrible advice, but it does neglect three critical but inconvenient truths. The first problem is what if that weakness is actually preventing you from advancing in your career? Focusing on your strengths alone is not going to mitigate that. You'll just get bitter and twisted when you're constantly overlooked for promotion and can't understand why. The second problem what if your weakness is a blind spot that no one's bothered to tell you about? If you're unaware of something, you don't have an opportunity to fix it. And in the meantime, the negative impact you have on your team could be devastating. And the third problem is if you know you have a failure in performance or behavior, it's going to dent your confidence. Even if you do your best to Ignore it and unbeknownst to you, it flows through to every other area of your performance. If you aren't confident in a critical area of leadership or business, it's going to rob you of your professional enjoyment and it will most likely limit your career opportunities. So I would really encourage you to commit to improving. How you approach it is going to be different for everyone, but the process is pretty simple. Identify your first step. No more than that. If you think about how far away you are from mastery, you will never even begin. It's going to feel too daunting, maybe even unattainable. You've got to start in a place that's within reach by doing something you can get your head around and then build on from there. Commit to taking that first small step and then rinse and repeat. Your confidence will grow and as it does, you'll be motivated to do more. You'll become more positive and optimistic even before you see results. And each little success is going to reinforce your commitment. That is how you build confidence. I use this technique to attain mastery in negotiation, in feedback conversations, in dozens of critical leadership disciplines. I wasn't born with these skills and no one coached me through the process. I just committed to doing the reps. As Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu said, the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. I really hope you commit to taking whatever that first step is for you. If you want to get your hands on some specific scripts to help you build your confidence in key leadership scenarios, have a listen to episode 276 of the no Bullshit Leadership podcast, Building Leadership Confidence. We'll leave a link in the show notes. I really hope you enjoyed this moment and that it gives you that extra little spark to be a no Bullshit.