No Dunks – October 3, 2025

Episode Title: Kuminga Stalemate Ends, Grimes Signs QO & NBA Nickname Alignment Chart
Hosts: Trey Kirby & Tas Melis

Episode Overview

This episode of No Dunks dives into several late-preseason NBA headlines and wraps up the offseason with a bit of fun: a live-building of the definitive NBA Nickname Alignment Chart. Trey and Tas, holding down the Classic Factory as studio renovations wind down, break down Jonathan Kuminga’s new contract and imminent trade rumors, Quentin Grimes betting on himself, and key signings for the Warriors and Heat. Then, the hosts, along with the vibrant Stream Team chat, build a fun matrix of legendary and iconic NBA nicknames by tier and career type.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Studio & Host Updates (00:07–03:09)

• No Skeets, but good news: Skeets and Nora’s green cards approved; season previews and a revamped studio are imminent.
• “People were already pouring one out...for the old purple walls.” - Trey Kirby (00:34)
• Light banter about paint jobs, color names, and “best jobs” leads into season news.

2. Jonathan Kuminga’s Contract Stalemate Ends (03:09–17:49)

The Deal

• 2 years, $48.5 million with Warriors; team option on second year (03:09)
• Designed for flexibility: can be “ripped up” and renegotiated next summer; eligible for trade Jan 15.
• “It’s hard to see this working...” - Tas Melis (03:50)

Immediate Take

• Tas: Warriors want Kuminga to fill an Andrew Wiggins-like role (ball-mover, defender, not a #1 guy), but Kuminga still sees himself as a star. (03:50–05:49)
• Trey: Both sides expect a trade; the contract serves almost as “a human trade exception.” “It makes the contract into sort of like a human trade exception.” (05:49)
• Kuminga’s future: Likely tradable and likely traded, but contract does maximize his value and flexibility for both player and team.

Team Fit and Market

• Warriors want to preserve cap flexibility; could flip Kuminga for depth/size.
• Possible trade fits: Bucks, Kings, Suns, Wizards (e.g., Kuzma discussed as a fit, 14:08).
• Both hosts agree: Kuminga will get some “trial runs” and minutes but will almost certainly be showcased for a trade.

Notable Quotes

• "He's too much of a ball stopper... I just don't see how Jonathan Kuminga becomes that Andrew Wiggins-esque type of player ever for this team.” – Tas Melis (04:48)
• “I will be shocked if Kumingais on the Warriors after the trade deadline.” – Trey Kirby (12:32)
• Pitbull wisdom: “There are no failures, there's just learning.” – Tas Melis, quoting Pitbull (11:50)

3. Warriors Roster Moves: Seth Curry Signs; Depth Questions (17:49–24:02)

Seth Curry Joins Warriors (17:49)

• Signed on an Exhibit 9 contract for camp; will likely be cut then re-signed mid-November for cap reasons (19:06).
• Trey: Move is “basically a Vibes move”; team has too many guards, but Steph always wanted to play with his brother.
• Tas notes “everyone in the Curry family but Steph has a podcast” (20:13).

Playing Time & Chemistry

• Seth will get practice reps, may eat minutes as injuries crop up (21:16–22:12).
• Fun family moments: Seth tried to buy #30 from Steph; family happy to cheer for one team (22:54).
• Depth remains a concern, particularly up front with the 35+ club—who is the fifth starter?

4. Quentin Grimes Signs Qualifying Offer with Sixers (24:02–32:47)

The Deal

• 1-year, $8.7M qualifying offer; gets veto power over trades (24:02)
• Grimes turned down reported 4-yr, $39M extension. (24:38)

Implications

• Tas: It’s a “contract year” bet for Grimes—he sees himself as worth more.
• Trey: Both sides mismanaged negotiations; likely Grimes' last year with Sixers as they can’t offer much more due to the cap/tax (26:28).
• Sixers’ cap situation is dire: Embiid, Paul George, Maxey take up $160M/year starting soon.

Roster Outlook

• Minutes up for grabs with thin wing depth, injuries to Paul George and Jared McCain, and limited alternatives.
• A season of experimentation and likely struggles, per both hosts.

5. Miami Heat Re-sign Nikola Jovic (33:19–37:47)

• 4-yr, $62.4M extension (33:19).
• Jovic: performed well for Serbia, only 22, strong playmaking and shooting (35:38).
• Debate: Should he start over Khalil Ware at PF? Both think yes, at least to start, due to shooting/passing versatility.
• “He, at the very least, is going to be a solid role player for Miami with a chance to outplay this deal and make it look like a bargain for Miami.” – Trey Kirby (34:26)

6. NBA Nickname Alignment Chart: The Ultimate Bracket (38:18–66:24)

Gameplan

• Inspired by Reddit alignment charts: cross NBA player career tiers (Hall of Fame, All-Star, Starter, Role Player) with nickname tiers (Legendary, Good, Solid, Basic).
• Built live with listener input; a rapid-fire, laughter-filled exercise full of nostalgic and deep-cut references.

Select Chart Entries

| Career \ Nickname | Hall of Fame | All-Star | Starter | Role Player | |-------------------|-------------------|------------------|--------------|---------------| | Hall of Fame | Kobe “Black Mamba” Bryant (39:34) | Sean “The Matrix” Marion (41:53) | Andre “AK47” Kirilenko (43:33) | Rafer “Skip To My Lou” Alston (45:41) | | All-Star | Giannis “Greek Freak” Antetokounmpo (47:23) | Glenn “Big Dog” Robinson (48:59) | Jason “White Chocolate” Williams (49:53) | Chris “Birdman” Andersen (50:10) | | Starter | Allen “The Answer” Iverson (51:58) | Luka “Luka Magic” Doncic (53:40) | Dennis “3D” Scott (55:55) | Daniel “Booby” Gibson (56:47) | | Role Player | Tracy “T-Mac” McGrady (58:39) | Damian “Dame D.O.L.L.A.” Lillard (60:30) | Kyle “Slow Mo” Anderson (63:28) | Brian “White Mamba” Scalabrine (65:27) |

• Notable runner-ups discussed: “Big Shot Bob,” “The Glove,” “Jesus Shuttlesworth,” “Big Country,” “Manimal,” “The Bald Mamba,” among others.
• Discussion of why certain nicknames fit/don't fit, and generational trends (e.g., the “The ___” era, initials era).
• “There are no failures, there’s just learning.” – Tas Melis quoting Pitbull, reflecting on both contracts and nicknames (11:50)
• “Old Mud” is revealed as Trey’s men’s league nickname—originating from his daughters roasting him (66:27).

Timestamp Highlights

• 03:09: Kuminga’s contract drama breakdown begins
• 05:49: Kuminga as “human trade exception”
• 14:08: Discussion of hypothetical Kuzma-for-Kuminga trade
• 19:06: Seth Curry’s contract maneuver explained
• 24:02: Quentin Grimes’ qualifying offer and Sixers’ situation
• 33:19: Jovic extension and Miami’s frontcourt debate
• 38:18: Nickname Alignment Chart segment starts
• 66:27: Trey’s nickname “Old Mud” story

Memorable Quotes & Banter

• "I just don't see how Jonathan Kuminga becomes that Andrew Wiggins-esque type of player ever for this team." – Tas Melis (04:48)
• “It makes the contract into sort of like a human trade exception. Like they do have $22.5 million to trade come deadline time, but in the meantime it's good for everybody.” – Trey Kirby (05:49)
• “Both sides, kind of foresee Kuminga being elsewhere… I think this worked out the best way it possibly could.” – Trey Kirby (05:49)
• “Ever have a nickname?” – Trey Kirby | “Not really...My daughter yesterday started saying molasses...People called me Tassis Molasses.” – Tas Melis (66:22)
• “He becomes the Birdman.” – Trey (50:24)
• “Man, we made a nice chart.” – Trey, after finishing the nickname matrix (65:34)

Overall Tone & Takeaway

The show delivers a blend of deep roster insight, fun hypotheticals, and irreverent nostalgia. The hosts’ tone is breezy and quick-witted; both are unafraid to call out front office blunders, overplay contract drama, or poke gentle fun at NBA culture. Listener interaction is heavy and shapes the entire Nickname Chart segment.

This episode is a perfect listen for fans wanting a comprehensive off-season wrap-up and a reminder of why NBA culture—on and off the floor—remains endlessly entertaining.

Find the full Nickname Alignment Chart on @NoDunksInc social channels or stream the full episode for hilarious side tangents and even deeper cut nickname lore.