← Noche de Pendejadas with Alannized
Noche de Pendejadas with Alannized
Tessa Talks All: Childhood, Parent's Divorce, Passport Drama, CHISME & MORE!!!
01:41:58
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- [00:00]
Sponsor Announcer
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- [02:06]
Tessa Ortega
My whole for you page was just filled with like bashing me and I just didn't like I ended up filtering my for your page but it was literally a trend to just hate on me.
- [02:32]
Alanized
What is up everyone?
- [02:33]
I'm your host Alanized and this is Noche de Fin Dejadas, your favorite podcast turned talk show. And on the Yo Trigo atus influencers. Super emotional. That's four. So without further ado, please help me welcome my guest tonight, Tessa Ortega.
- [02:58]
Hello.
- [02:58]
Hello friend. How are you? Good, how are you? Let me just go ahead and say really quick amigas. The amount of times I've had to reschedule Tessa, like I should be canceled at this point. Amigas canceling Portol Internet. The first time we were supposed to film Amigas. And I told you maybe, like, two days ahead. And I rescheduled her for yesterday. I scheduled anything for the Monday after we came back.
- [03:39]
Tessa Ortega
I saw you post in Vegas. I'm like, you know how.
- [03:42]
Alanized
Yes.
- [03:43]
Tessa Ortega
I was like, he's gonna lag. You know how there's people that I, like, set their nail appointments and they see their nail tech out the night before, they're like, like, I just should prep.
- [03:51]
Alanized
Just say, literally, you guys. And I'm super excited. She is somewhere out and about.
- [04:21]
Tessa Ortega
Every time I'm out and about, it's always with, like, my family or, like, close friends of mine. But I think this weekend I kind of just went to San Diego for, like, my mom's cousin's basketball game out there. It was a college game. It was really fun. I loved it. Just took pictures out there with that being. I'm tessa ortega. I'm 16 years old. Basically, who I am as a person, I'm kind of always just to myself, like, when it comes to, like, my friends, like, or meeting new people, like, I'm very extroverted as well. So when it comes to meeting me, I'm not going to, like, give you guys, like, a hard time to, like, make or not have a conversation or. But I'm very outgoing. But I also am to myself as, like, a person.
- [05:15]
Alanized
And I'm going to go ahead and start off with the question I always love starting with about your upbringing and how you were raised. How was Tessa growing up?
- [05:33]
Tessa Ortega
I think I was always an extroverted person. I think as I grew up, though, I kind of, like, calmed down. But definitely, like, during elementary time, I was very outgoing and, like, thinking I was the boss and just. I don't know, I was. That's just how I was. How I. I think it's also because I got it from my mom because that's how she is as, like, a person. I think I was a little left out because my sister would, like, be with her friends, and my brother was always occupied with, like, doing baseball. So I would call. I would, like, always try to, like, since my brother was busy with baseball and, like, already gone, like, out of the house. My sister was home with all her friends, so I would just try to, like, hang out with all of them, and I would just try to fit in. But she would always like, my mom. She wouldn't even, like, my mom would not like me trying to hang out with my sister's friends. At the time, she would just be like, stay in your room. Or just like this and that. Because obviously I was younger than all of them, so she didn't like it. But I don't know.
- [06:28]
Alanized
Do you feel like that was a big reason why you became an introverted child because you almost felt like your sister was too busy with her friends on your own? Do you feel like that was a big reason why you kind of closed off a little bit as a child?
- [06:43]
Tessa Ortega
I don't think that was the case because I feel like I became more introverted now than how I was back then. Because back then I didn't care. I wouldn't care what my mom said at all. I would still go to her room if even if all her friends are over, I would still try to go and my sister would try to kick me out or this, this and that. But I feel like what closed me off now was probably just like having trust issues with people and like all that stuff, which is we'll talk about later. But as of right now, that's the only reason why I'm kind of like more closed off into myself.
- [07:09]
Alanized
Do you feel like you and your siblings got along growing up?
- [07:12]
Tessa Ortega
No, we definitely did get along. If anything, we're like beaming with each other now. I'm just kidding. No. Every time we would get along, our parents would always think we're fighting. Like, I don't know why. Every time we're getting along, my mom would always go in the room and like yell at us, like thinking we're arguing or something. And we're like, we're just. We're bonding. We're actually bonding for the first time. And you're. You're getting mad at us. Like, for what? No one ever knows this. I was actually closer to my brother growing up instead of my sister. Like, I would literally have sleepovers in. My brother had a bunk bed and I would always sleep over in his room and we would always just like play Minecraft split screen. Like, I was way closer to him because my sister was like doing busy during that was. She was also doing social media at the time, so she was busy. Like, so I wouldn't really have time to spend with her. So I would just like stay in my brother's room with him playing on the like PS4, PS3. Just playing games with him. We don't really show him anymore because he kind of stopped posting. And not that it's bad or anything, it's just he does. He still does post to this day. But I definitely did get Closer to my sister because of social media, because we do get invited to, like, the same events. So usually when my sister gets invited somewhere, then she will have, like, me and my mom as a plus two. It does make up for, like, the past of, like, us not really being, like, as close as we are now. But definitely, I would say that's a. That it was a big help for, like, us to be able to bond. It's because my sister's always tried to, like, put us into social media, like, me and my brother. Shoot. Oh, my God. If you guys look at her old YouTube videos or her old content is literally just.
- [08:46]
Alanized
She's been doing this since she was born. Yeah, right. Like, she came out with the camera.
- [08:50]
Tessa Ortega
And literally in our faces, and we'll record us. We would get so mad at her, and she would just try to, like, push it, like, for us to do social media as well. And my brother started doing it, but then he kind of, like, stopped, but now he's trying to do it again. But then me, oh, my God, I'd be so mad if she tried to get me on the camera. I would literally. It would literally start family arguments because of that. Because I would go to my mom and dad and be like, look, you're letting her record me. You're letting her do.
- [09:13]
Alanized
Why didn't you like it?
- [09:15]
Tessa Ortega
Honestly, I don't know. To this day, I don't know why. I think it's because I was, like, insecure because of how the way I looked.
- [09:21]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [09:22]
Tessa Ortega
And that's the only reason I could think of.
- [09:25]
Alanized
Would people at school bring up your sister's videos? And you'd be like, I know.
- [09:30]
Tessa Ortega
During the time of quarantine, I think when I. Like when I hated it the most. So no one was really able to say anything. But I think that's why I didn't like it, because I didn't. Because quarantine, I was kind of, like, not posting or posting anything at all. So her posting what I look like, what I'm doing, I was like, okay, stop now.
- [09:47]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [09:47]
Tessa Ortega
Like, you know, so it's crazy to think back, like, that's how I was. And then this is how I am now, my freshman year. That's when I started getting into it more and posting myself and being more confident with myself. And I think that's like, the time I was just like, I don't know. That's when I was like, okay, I can actually do this. When there's people, like, that used to comment under my videos or, like, say, oh, my God, you're so pretty. Because remember, I was an insecure person. So once I started getting those compliments, like just flush my comments, I was like, oh my God. I was like, really? I think I'm pretty. I'm like, okay, what do you think.
- [10:20]
Alanized
Led to you having these insecurities as a kid? Do you feel like there was like a moment or just like anything about yourself that you hated growing up?
- [10:28]
Tessa Ortega
Matter of fact, there's only one time that I don't really think that's the reason why it affected me. But I think in elementary there is like a group of like obviously elementary boys. Yeah, there was like a time of them just like body shaming, me being like, oh, you're gonna need plastic surgery, you're flat. I'm like, I'm thinking back on that now. I'm just like, why was little boys worried about what, what, like how you look a 10 year old looks? I'm like, honestly, I don't Even know if 10 year, 10 year old is the right age to say. But I'm just like, that's the only thing I could think of. But I don't think that affected me as much, like to make me insecure. But I think I was just always hard on myself. I'm all like, I think I will forever be like that at the end of the day because, like, even though I have hate comments now, I feel like at the end of day I'm always going to be like my own biggest critic. Yeah, I mean, critic at the end of the day because I don't know.
- [11:23]
Alanized
And I feel like that's so normal. Pork as the baddest of the baddest amigas have insecurities. And I feel like that just comes with being a human. Omegas, we're always going to be like our hardest critics. So I'm glad. Growing up, what was that like? Do you feel like you were more of a daddy's girl or a mommy's girl?
- [11:48]
Tessa Ortega
Not in a bad way or anything. I wasn't really either because I feel like my mom was busy with like my sister taking her to events because this was like obviously before I started doing social media. So my mom was busy with my sister taking to her events. And then my brother was with my dad all the time. Like my dad was there, like taking him to his baseball games. I feel like that helped me be a very independent person. But definitely now a mommy's girl. But during that time I think I was just like by myself. I think definitely not jealous of my brother because I saw him. He was a boy. I was like, I don't really care, like, whatever. But probably my sister, in a way. I would just be like, damn, they're over here doing this and this and this without me, you know? But it was never. It was just, like, saying that and then just like, okay, whatever. Like, let me just do whatever I got to do. Let me go. Because I would play video games at the time. I'm going to go play video games. I don't care.
- [12:36]
Alanized
You're like, I have more free time. You're like, yeah.
- [12:39]
Tessa Ortega
So it wasn't like, that deep for me to be, like, all butthurt about it or, like, if they were to come home after, like, coming from an event, like, sneak dissing them or anything. It was kind of just like that, though.
- [12:49]
Alanized
Did you understand that at the time? Manager?
- [12:56]
Tessa Ortega
I think I didn't understand at the time, so I was a little butt hurt. But definitely now I understand, and I feel like that's okay. You know how there's some parents that say, like, oh, you understand when you're older, or like, this and this and that. It's just like, you don't understand literally until you're.
- [13:13]
Alanized
Until you're older.
- [13:14]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah. I feel like that's the main part of it, though. I'm just like, that. I'm just like, okay, like, whatever. Like, I'll do my own thing.
- [13:21]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [13:22]
Tessa Ortega
I used to think about things like that, actually. I'm just like, oh, my God, I can't wait for one day. Like, I'm gonna be doing things on my own. I'm like, do a little dinner. Like, going to dinner by myself, like, driving, like, just by myself in my car. Or, like, just think about stuff like that. Like, I feel like other people wouldn't. They always have, like, a person next to them. But I always think of doing things, like, on my own. And that's what my mom and sister say all the time. Like, why do you always think like that? If you're gonna move out, then move out. But if it ever came out, do, like. If it ever came down to it, they probably would be like, girl, where are you going?
- [13:54]
Alanized
Wait, do you want to move out when you're, like, 18? Like, what are your, like, plans when it comes to moving? Now she's looking at mama.
- [14:00]
Tessa Ortega
No, because I actually talked about this with my mom before because I was like, I was considering it, like, a little bit, but she was just like, girl, you're not moving out till you're 18. And I'm like, okay, valid Because I always ask her hypothetical questions, like, would you still love me if I did this? Or like, I was asking her, like, a hypothetical question, and I was just like, oh, what would you do if I wanted to move out right now? And she's like, call the cops. Like, if you tried moving out right now, I'd call the cops. Because you're not 18. But I don't think. Honestly, I don't think I would. Unless I'm just like, no, I don't think I would.
- [14:34]
Alanized
I feel like it's just, like, a typical of a child's mindset growing up. I remember growing up hating all the house rules. Quillo empredicia yo mera los diciocho anos. Which I did. But I'm not gonna lie, you guys. I moved out to my sue grass house in Danny's little bedroom. Sovia mente. I didn't really moved out having all my shit together, But I do remember growing up. Yo siempre migas. Siempre, siempre, siempre. My mom would tell me I would be like, but it's so much harder than you actually think, moving out.
- [15:05]
Tessa Ortega
I think that's the only reason why I would want to move out is for, like, I think more freedom, honestly, because my mom. People don't know this, but literally, my mom is the strictest person ever. Like, if I. If I try to go out on my own, there's not one moment that I'm not out with my mom or, like, a security. And the only reason why I have a security, it's not because, oh, she thinks she's this or she thinks she's that. It's because I don't have a male figure in my life anymore. Like, my. Like, my dad is obviously still in my life, but, like, to go to these type of events, it's not like, I could just call up my dad and be like, hey, can you come with me to this event? This and that. Like, he's working. Yeah, he lives on his own now. Like, I can't just do that, you know? That's the only times, like, I'm able to go out by myself is like, if I'm with my mom or my security, when people get, like, all, like, in the comments, they're like, oh, why is the mom. She's too old. She said, no, my mom's 39. I do not think that's old at all.
- [15:54]
Alanized
If that's old and she don't even look 39. About wanting to move out and the strict house rules. Que to mama les tiene. What are two rules that you always are? Like oh my God. Mome gusta nes arreglas.
- [16:10]
Tessa Ortega
Oh my God. It's probably just like I think, hey.
- [16:14]
Alanized
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- [19:02]
Tessa Ortega
I have fomo, you know, right? Like, and I have a friend group, so every time, like, they hang out with each other or, like, invite me to go somewhere, even if it's like a birthday party, my mom will be like, you're not going. I'm like, that's the. I hate the feeling of having, like. I'm like, what?
- [19:19]
Alanized
You're like, what do you mean?
- [19:21]
Tessa Ortega
I want to go though. Like, what are you talking about? I think it would just be like the going out and which is just like an average strict rule. I don't think it's like, anything big. Oh, my God, I hate this so much. Like, I hate having a curfew. She, like, every time, even. It's just to go, like, get ice cream or something with my friends. Be home by 10, not leave by 10. Get home by.
- [19:42]
Alanized
What happens if you're not home by 10?
- [19:43]
Tessa Ortega
Oh, my God, my phone, my iPad, my Instagram account, everything. That's why I just. And I know she doesn't play. Like, it's not like, oh, let me test it. Let me see if she's really gonna do it because she's done it before. I've been grounded for a year before. A year? Yeah, because of my. Oh, my God.
- [19:59]
Alanized
Okay.
- [19:59]
Tessa Ortega
Another strict thing is my grades. If my grades are good, that's. That's it. That's. Everything's gone. And she's just gonna. Oh, my God, that would be so bad if my grades, which I feel.
- [20:09]
Alanized
Like those are like, very standard.
- [20:11]
Tessa Ortega
It's very standard. And I just feel like. I feel like it's not crazy, but it's just like, those are rules. Like, I hate. I do not play about my curfew at all. Because once it hits, like, a certain time and I'm still out, she'll text me and be like, oh, you're on your way already, right? Like, you better be or something like that. Like. Or I would just get like a bunch of threat messages from my mom or something and I'd be like, okay.
- [20:33]
Alanized
You'Re like, when you walk in, please le phone on the table.
- [20:37]
Tessa Ortega
No, she's the type to be standing at the door and be ready, like, have her hand out and everything and be like, put it here.
- [20:42]
Alanized
That's good, that's good.
- [20:45]
Tessa Ortega
Though.
- [20:45]
Alanized
Have you ever sneaked out?
- [20:46]
Tessa Ortega
I wouldn't necessarily say it was sneaking out, but I was very young and I was at my cousin's house, and literally we went. I'm not even lying. We went on a walk. It was, like, right here to all the way to the end of the road. Like, technically to the end of the room, but, like, it was the sidewalk. We were with my cousin, and we were with, like, her friends. And her friends recorded a video and posted it on Instagram. And it was like. I forgot what time it was. It was like 1am I think my mom didn't see it. She would have never even figured out. But it was actually my cousin. My cousin told her mom and. Which is my Nina. And my Nina told my mom. If she sees this, I'm sorry. I still don't even get along with her to this day because I could never forgive her for that because of the way I'm so traumatized of being in trouble for that day. Literally, the whole day passed by and. Oh, my God, the whole day passed by. As soon as we get home, I'm going to sleep. I was over here thinking, I gotta wait with it. Whatever. As soon as, like, I'm asleep, literally my eyes are closed. I'm, like, halfway asleep. My dad opens my door and he grabs me. We go to my mom's room, and my mom's over here with the phone like this, and she's showing me the video, and my whole outfit is showing and everything. And then she said, who's this? I said, I was like. At first, I was denying. I was denying effort. That's not me. That's not me. She said, tessa, we were literally just there yesterday, and you're wearing that same outfit, like, to the. I remember I saw that shirt before. Like, we moved out to. From our old house or, like, from our old, old house. And I remember her seeing that shirt, and she was like, I could never see that shirt. The same. She shows me the video. I'm looking at it. I'm trying to deny it. My mind. It's like those movie scenes where you're just, like, blanked out, but you're just hearing screaming at you. And I'm just looking at the video, and I'm like, wow, there's no way this is for real right now. My punishment was getting beat, that's for sure, because it happened in San Bernardino. So she just wanted to traumatize me. Because during the time, I guess that she heard that there was kidnappings, this and this and that, she oh, my God. I remember the next day, after I got beat, she was just like, you know that was suicide, right? I was like. I looked at her. I was like, suicide? I was like, what? I was like, what are you talking about, suicide? And she was like, you basically just try to kill yourself by walking in the streets of San Bernardino at that time by yourself. Being a little girl, and, like, looking at it now, I'm just like, okay, that's kind of understandable because it makes sense. I was a little girl, like, in. Well, it does. It doesn't really make sense because I literally went down the street. Yeah, definitely. I've never done since a hundred percent. Never tried it. I'll just ask. If I can't go, I can't go. I'm not gonna. Definitely not gonna try it.
- [23:35]
Alanized
Sneaking out for every teen is like something que todo squier in a ser. I don't think I've ever told this story. Pero yo con dostava in her high school. Amigas. When my mom started letting me sleep over at my friend's house, amigas that my mom would only let me sleepover at their house. Whenever I would go sleep at my friend Dalia's house, shout out to Dalia, I would go sleep over. I sneaked out to go meet up with this guy that at the time I was talking to was like, oh, my family's out of town. Like, don't worry, but tell me why I get there. And maybe, like, 20 minutes after I get there, we start, like, kissing. And it's funny because, like, my friend's house was super far from where I was at, and it wasn't, like, the ghetto. And I remember I slept over at someone's house that I was with. And I remember I got there to their house. I really didn't know the girls, you guys. Funny story. I actually just ran into them. I think it was, like, at the besame Muncho festival. I literally bought them a shot because I was like, y'all were a real one for letting a stranger dormiren su casa, pero ques muy normal that every almost teenager wants to sneak out out. But it is very scary, her being my mom.
- [25:22]
Tessa Ortega
I see it, like, if I were to have a daughter, like, anything that young, like, if you know how San Bernardino is, they kind of just wouldn't like to traumatize me to know to never do that again. And I definitely never did it again.
- [25:33]
Alanized
And she learned her lesson, you know, aside from all the personal hate you get, talk to us a little bit about that.
- [25:53]
Tessa Ortega
That's the only, like, hate comments. Don't really like as gets me as much, but, like, when they talk about my mom, it's just like, I wish, like, we had, like, a reality TV show so you guys could see what really goes on. Because my mom is not like that at all. The only reason why she's going to these events is because at the end of the day, she has two roles. She's our mom and our manager. So while we're there at the event, she's also networking. So it's not just like she's there for no reason. I think it's very helpful because it's good to know in the back of my mind that at least it's my mom doing it.
- [26:22]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [26:22]
Tessa Ortega
If it was someone else, like, I've heard so many other influencers and other people talk about how they get over like, all these contracts, this and this and that. And I'm just like, I have my mom, my mom, at the end of the day, I live with her. She's not gonna do me like that. Like, obviously, like, she does deserve her part at the end of the day because she is her mission. Yeah. And it's just like, I don't know. I just know for sure, like, I'm grateful to have her as my manager more than anyone else. Like, for. To manage me, especially because I am underage and they think that I'm naive so they could, like, take advantage. Yeah. Like, just take advantage of that. So I'm just grateful that she's my manager, if anything.
- [27:00]
Alanized
Quiero flaticarde algo un poquito mace serio elano pasado from the months of July to August. Pasas por algo super difficile. And I want to talk about it. Parents divorce and it quickly got clipped and it was all over TikTok. How did you react to the news during the time?
- [27:29]
Tessa Ortega
They were basically just living in the same house but not talking to each other. So it was kind of just like we thought, like, me, my brother and sister, we all thought it was just like, oh, a little argument that they're having. But it was kind of off for a while. And I think I was very nonchalant to it at the time because I was distracted. I had. I started meeting these friends, this and this and that. But I remember the night that it first that I figured out was when my mom ended up telling me that before my dad left to Arizona with my brother, that he said he's gonna. When they come back from Arizona. That he was gonna grab. Grab all his things and just leave. And I was like. When she told me that, I was like, damn, this is, like, for real now. I was still kind of like, no, he's not. He's just gonna come back, and everything's gonna. Like, y'all are gonna make up. Everything's gonna be fine. This and this. Not whatever. But I would say. And at first, I think it barely affected me. Obviously, during the time of the live stream, that's when it did affect me. Because when everything was going on because I was distracted by a lot, I started making. As I was saying, I did make a group of friends. So I would go out, I would do this and that. Like, I would just try to, like, get my mind, like, off of it, you know? And once. Once I. Once I actually was able to, like, sit down in my room, and when things were, like, for real happening, like my dad selling the house and everything, I was just like, what is going on? Like, he's really gonna do this to us, you know, like, obviously my relationship with him now is kind of different, but I think it's just like, why? Why would you do that, knowing that? Like, because during this time, my brother still lived with us, too. And I was like, all your kids are, like, in the house, and you're just gonna, like, throw us out like that? Like, that's all we meant to you, you know? Oh, my God, stop. I was just like, damn, that kind of hurt, you know?
- [29:22]
Alanized
Arizona Y REGRESA NIEMPIES what was that moment like for you?
- [29:28]
Tessa Ortega
I never saw him get his stuff together. I kind of just. I would just see the, like, arguments that would break out in our household, and I would just, like, be in my room. But I remember when there was, like, one time when I was just, like, in my room, and my mom and dad were just arguing, and I was just like, why did things have to be this way? You know? I was just like, we were literally just like, the perfect family. The perfect family. And I was just like, oh, my God, that's so amazing. I. But, yeah, it kind of hurt because I was like, damn. We were really just, like, the perfect five of family. Like, when my sister would record videos and stuff, looking back at it, I was just like, why did he have to really mess this up for us? Like, this is the life he chose. Like, he wanted to do this and that with other people. Like, he chose that life. Like, he. Him choosing, like, leaving us. That's what he really wanted. And don't, like, I don't know how to really, like, say it, but it kind of just hurt in that way.
- [30:27]
Alanized
Because I was just like, Nosquintas was the one that broke down the news to you. Did your dad ever have a convo with you guys, like, explaining what was going on on his end?
- [30:38]
Tessa Ortega
We still haven't had that conversation, but it's obviously, like, we did talk about it, and I know that my mom was already mentally checked out of the marriage because of everything he was doing. I would see it. My dad, he was like the angry man in the household. He would just be like, the only days we had with him were Sundays because that's when he didn't have work. And it was very like, how do I say it? And even some. The Sundays that we would have with him weren't even, like, they weren't good Sunday. They weren't good Sundays. Like, it would be rare for us to have, like, an actual good day with him, But I think he was just physically there, but not there. And that's what kind of like. I think that's the reason why I was kind of okay, because it's just like, oh. But I didn't really lose anything because he. It was never there. But realizing that it was kind of. That it was like a big change because we were just a family. That's when I was just like, oh, wait, this is kind of a big thing.
- [31:45]
Alanized
You guys had to move out of your house, right? Did he stay in that home?
- [31:49]
Tessa Ortega
No, he ended up. At first, he started. He got it. My mom got him an apartment. He didn't want it anymore because he didn't want her to pay for it, I guess. And we were like, okay, like, we're able to pay off the house that we were living in. Like, that was. That was my mom's dream home. So we literally. It was built. We would always just, like, drive past the house and just see our house getting built. So that was her dream home. We didn't want to leave it. Like, it was me, my sister and brother. Like, we didn't want to leave the house. So we were just like, oh, we're just going to stay. Like, can we just pay for it? Like, and he was like, no, we don't want you to stay, or I don't want you to stay in it.
- [32:25]
Alanized
Your dad?
- [32:26]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah. He was like, you guys are going to move. I don't want you to. And we were like, but why? We'll just pay for it. Like, we got this, this and this and that. And then he ended up just like, Literally making us move out of it, out of the house. And we were kind of scared at first because we were like, where do we go? Like, and it was, like, a short amount of time for us to, like, look for houses, too. We were like. We were kind of scared. We were like, damn, Are we probably, like, left on the street right now? Like, that's.
- [32:52]
Alanized
I don't know, like, break the lease or. Why was he, like, kicking you guys out?
- [32:56]
Tessa Ortega
We don't know. Like, he just didn't want us to have the house anymore at all. There is, like, everything was fine. The mortgage was paid. Like, there was nothing. He just didn't want us to live there anymore because we don't know why either. Maybe because he felt like that was our home. Yeah, like, maybe he was like, oh, this is our home. I don't want you guys to stay there either. But it's just like, you don't care where we were going to be left. Like, we were almost just left, like, on the streets. What else were we going to do?
- [33:23]
Alanized
Did you have a moment where the divorce actually finally hit you? Por quenos cuentas que en el momento quesad pasando todo super distraida con toa pasando ati entubida personal. Was there a moment where it finally synced in, like, oh, my God, my parents are divorcing. It's for reals.
- [33:42]
Tessa Ortega
The thing that actually hit me was literally, and it's probably embarrassing for the first thing to do was pick up my phone and just go live. I think when it actually hit me is when I was on live doing that live stream, and, like, I saw comments of it, like, because everything was still kind of fresh, and I was just seeing comments over and over, and I was reading it and I was trying to explain the situation on why we were moving, and I was like, like, damn, this is real. This is my life now. Like, everything really did alter in a way. I didn't want it to be. I didn't talk to my dad for. I would. I would say, like, about a year. Like, it's very. Everything's still fresh. Like, I just started getting along with my dad recently, and everything's good. Before, I didn't really have, like, again, I told you, I didn't really have a relationship with my mom and dad, but I now I have a relationship with him. Like, I feel like after he kind of trying to prove that he's there for us, because that's one thing. When they were going through the divorce, we would tell him, you were never there for us. You were. You were here for, like, I would tell him. I'm like, you weren't there for any of my school assemblies. Like, my mom was always there. You were never there. This and this and that. And that's when I feel like he's just trying to make it up now by taking us, like, on these day, like on these, like, dinner dates and all this stuff. So I was like, like, so it's a little better now, I would say, I think the beginning. Then again, even when all this was going down, like my parents divorce, like, he was still there. Like my. My quinceanera. He was there, but my mind wasn't on my parents. Then again, because I was more focused on, like, my. My social media, like, and all this stuff. So I didn't really pay attention that I didn't have a relationship with him.
- [35:20]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [35:20]
Tessa Ortega
But he would try during that time. And once, once. Once I stopped talking to him was after he could. He kicked us out. And that's when I just completely stopped talking to him. And the only time I recently started talking to him is after my parents went to court. He came to, like, drop off a child support check, and my mom and sister were talking to him downstairs, and I didn't want to go downstairs. I was like, I'm not talking to him. Like, I would be so, like, like stuck up on the fact that I didn't want to talk to him. So he ended up going upstairs on his own and coming to my room. And I was just like. Like, I was like. He was like, hugging me. He was giving my side, like a side cheek kiss. And then I was just like, whatever, you know. But eventually we did end up, like, hanging out, like, me, my sister and brother. So I feel like definitely things are like, okay right now, but not like the best, you know, like the best in the world. Like, we have everything back to normal. I feel bad for being so selfish because during the time, like, you know how I told you I was distracted, so I didn't really, like, care about, like, what anyone's doing. Not that I. Since I didn't have that relationship with my dad, I wasn't there for my mom. And my mom is the one that, like, completely fell into, like, depression, like, bad. So me not being there for her and being distracted with all this other stuff, I like, it's kind of. I kind of like, I'm on. I'm hard on myself for that because it's just like, damn, you wish you.
- [36:45]
Alanized
Could have been there.
- [36:46]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah, I wish I could have been there for her because I wasn't. You know, I think it was also because me being distracted with all that friend stuff during the time of my parents divorce was also during the time of the drama. So I. I felt like I had my own things to worry about and wasn't being considerate of like, real problems because drama that was. That was social media. Like, that doesn't matter. I have real life problems at home with my, my, like my mom and my dad. I don't know why I was more concerned about that at the time when it didn't mean anything. Like, that was literally just like little girl drama that was just put onto social media. You know, it was like high school drama.
- [37:21]
Alanized
We'll talk a little bit about the drama later on. But do you feel like having gone through that and then also having, you know, this real life problem going on, do you feel like it almost made it harder for you?
- [37:31]
Tessa Ortega
I think, yeah, it definitely did because I felt like I had two things going on inside of my head, and I felt like that was too much for me to process. So I was just like, I don't know, I was just like, I didn't know what to do with myself in a way.
- [37:43]
Alanized
How was your relationship with your siblings throughout the whole process? Do you feel like you guys almost had to divide and pick sides between your mom and your dad?
- [37:52]
Tessa Ortega
I think my. Me and my sister closer, but my brother, no, not like in a bad thing or anything. I feel like my brother, it's kind of just like on his own, not choosing sides as well. He's kind of just like doing his own thing. Like he's with his girlfriend. Like, they're practically married at this point. Like, you know, so I feel like him, he had his own life going on, and at the end of the day, it was just like me and my sister and my mom. So I feel like it's not like it. It didn't separate us to be like, oh, you're. You're choosing dad. Like, oh, that's messed up. This and this and that. I think it's just like kind of.
- [38:27]
Alanized
Divided the family a little bit about the change of, you know, family dynamics, Mama casa to live in. And then your brother went with your dad. What was that like going from having your whole family together in one home to now living separately?
- [38:46]
Tessa Ortega
Honestly, it. It kind of did. But then again, like I already told you, I said it, like, for my dad, he was a physical but absent father. So I didn't really notice at the time that he was ever gone. But with. That's the same thing for my brother. My brother was always in his room or, like, always at his girlfriend's house, which. Nothing wrong. That's perfectly fine. So the only ones that were home was always me, my mom, and sister. So I feel like the only difference that it made was just a new home. That's it, literally. But it's not like a. Like a. Something that was just, like, drastic or anything. It was literally just us in a new home. Like, it sucks that it had to be like that, because now we are all on our own. But I don't think it was anything like, oh, you're betraying us, or you choose dad over mom after everything he's done, you know, because my. At the end of the day, my brother, he lives with my dad, but he's never, like, really there. He's always at his.
- [39:35]
Alanized
You think he does it more for the freedom?
- [39:37]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah, definitely. Like, I'm not even going to lie. Like, Nate, if you see this, you know damn well. But it is for the freedom, definitely. Because I know if I lived with my dad, I would be getting that same treatment as well. And I remember there's actually one time when there was a fight between me and my mom. I was trying to go to Seafood Boil with my friends, and I was getting ready, and she's like, you didn't even ask and you're getting ready? And I was like, but I was going to ask after. I just wanted to get ready. And she was like, no, Tessa, when I get home, we're gonna have a talk. I'm tired of you doing this. You just don't ask, and you go this and this and that. And then I'm like, you know what? I don't feel like arguing right now. I'm gonna go to my dad's. And once I said that, because I didn't even talk to my dad at the time, like, at all. I just said that because I was mad at her at the moment that she didn't let me go. When she said that, she said, oh, you want to go to your dad's? Okay, Pack your things. Go. I packed my things. I went to my dad's. And then I was just, like, crying there the whole time. I was like, I fucked up. But my dad was, like, comforting me. He was like. Like he was a good sport. He was like, do you still want me to take you to Seafood World? I was like, no, it's okay. I was at my dad's, only just for the night. Like, I Just spent the night and I went back home.
- [40:39]
Alanized
Mom, I missed you. Literally.
- [40:42]
Tessa Ortega
Well, I literally, I didn't have my phone. She took my phone. She's like, you're not taking your phone with you. If I pay the bill and you're trying to go to your dad's. I was like, you know what, whatever, take my phone. I didn't have anything like, to do, so I was just watching like YouTube in my dad living room, like eating. But I ended up texting him off of like an iPad that my dad had. So I texted her off of that and I was like, can you pick me up, up? And she's like, I forgot what she said. But she was just saying something. And then when we got to the house, she was like, is that really how you're gonna do things now? Because if that's how you're gonna do things and just say that you're gonna pick up and go to your dad's, then live there. And I was like, I was like, no. And I feel like with my dad, he just like, he obviously wants to make up for everything else. So me going to like, he's gonna let me do whatever because he wants to make up for what he lost.
- [41:25]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [41:25]
Tessa Ortega
So I feel like with my mom, she has nothing to lose. So she's kind of more like disciplined on me. And even though I hate it, I say I hate it. Like at the end of the day, I know it's good like, that she does do all these, like, things for me. Being strict on me, this and that. Like, I. It. I always tell her when there's times like my friends invite me to go out or anything and then something happens, I'm like, damn, I'm. Look, I'm glad I didn't go. I'm like, mom, thank you for saying that I couldn't go because.
- [41:52]
Alanized
Yeah, you saved me. No, another cancellation. Do you feel like you're pretty perspective on love changed because of everything you saw with your parents? Almost like you're like, oh my God, there is no way I can find true love. Because what you did think was true love only lasted for 20 years.
- [42:09]
Tessa Ortega
Definitely. Yes, it did change my perspective a lot because I don't know, after 20 years of them being together and knowing that it just went like, like that, like, okay, bye, we're going to live on or like, do our own thing now. It's just like, that's so scary to me to feel like that, that it could happen to me. So in my heart, I am a lover girl and I do still have a little bit of hope that there is like one person out there for me that, like, I know I'm young and I probably. People are gonna be like, oh, you don't even know what love is. This and that. But I know definitely it probably will be there out for me one day. But it does scare me. And I feel like I would have. Have major trust issues and I would. Being in that relationship, I would probably self, like, self reflect and use my past trauma.
- [42:57]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [42:57]
Tessa Ortega
And probably be a little toxic in it because of that reason. But I would say definitely did change. Like, I feel like, not that it doesn't exist. I just feel like everyone is unloyal to each other after. I'm just like, there's not one person in the world that is. Is loyal. Actually, maybe. No, because I feel like at the end of the day, I know I am. So maybe there's someone out there like me. So that's the only. That is the only hope that I have in my heart to. To be able to know that there is, like, true love out there. Because I know in my heart that I am loyal. So I wouldn't do that to someone because I always think this. Like, I feel like it's a domino effect in this generation that people, once someone gets hurt, they.
- [43:42]
Alanized
They hurt people.
- [43:43]
Tessa Ortega
They hurt people. Like, hurt people hurt people at the end of the day. So after they get hurt, they just have trust issues and they close everyone out. So once someone else, like, tries genuinely coming into their life to, like, love them, they just. No, no, thank you. I don't want it. I don't want it. I don't want to try it.
- [43:58]
Alanized
I think it is very valid the way you think, because obia mente, you grew up with this idea of your parents loving each other. You know, they were showing you what their type of love was. Y alberque pues ovia mente la relacion fracas. Obviously it's going to discourage you or almost sometimes make you feel like you can't ever find true love. Pero ques? When you start dating, I feel like if you find the right man about your parents dating, what is that? Like, are you and your siblings for it or are you guys, like.
- [44:40]
Tessa Ortega
Honestly, people don't see what happens behind cameras. It already has happened. My mom and dad, matter of fact, have both moved on. And honestly, I don't like at first, it's obviously it's gonna be weird seeing your parents with someone else after growing up your whole life, like, seeing them together. It's Gonna be like, what the. Like, I'm not used to seeing you with it, like, with my dad or, like, with my mom. With my mom. So it's like, what? But honestly, I know both of them, they were not happy in the marriage. So for them to genuinely be happy afterwards, that's all that matters to me. Like, I don't. Like, I don't really, like. Then again, I'm in my own world. I'm in my own little bubble. Like, if you're doing good, that's all that matters. I'm gonna let you do whatever you got to do. If you guys have, like, relationship problems, this and this and that, like, I hope you guys solve it, but if you're happy, that's okay. My sister, she doesn't want to see my mom with anyone else. She doesn't want to. She. She's, like, in denial. She even brings it up sometimes. She's like, mom, imagine you and dad get back together or something like that. And we're. I just look at her. I'm like, girl, just. I can't necessarily say I even have hope for it because I don't see it happening at all. Yeah, Like, I. I just can't. Like, after everything happening, I just can't see my mom and dad get back together. And I think if they were to. I'd be really mad at them. I'd be like, so we. First of all, we lost the house for this all because of, like, for what? All these arguments. All of this and this and that. I'd be like, I would be mad if they got back together. I'd be like, like, you're like, just.
- [46:02]
Alanized
Move on, please, with your lives.
- [46:04]
Tessa Ortega
I would have been like, this was such a waste of time. Like, no matter how much I would love for them to, like, like my childhood self to be. For them to be back together. I think it's better off that they're.
- [46:13]
Alanized
Not said realistic because. And my parents would, like, argue or the talks and convos of, like, divorce would ever get brought up. Yo me, cuerdo que yo me. No, just with the thought of thinking of my parents, like, redoing their life with, like, somebody else that isn't, you know, my parent, you know, we're going to create our life. We're going to, like, you know, get a partner, get. Have kids, have a home, and that's going to be like, our new family. And it sucks to say, even though we're not going to abandon our parents, they're not going to be in our everyday life unless they're living with you. You know what I mean? But that's what I mean. Like, I think it's nice that you're not selfish and you're like, you know what? Yo quiero que mis papas and cuente para que 10.
- [47:07]
Tessa Ortega
That is actually one thing I was bringing up to my mom because she was like having her own little like she was having like an argument with one of her like her boyfriend. And I was like, mom, at the end of the day, like, who do you go to the grave with? And then I was like, yourself, we're all like, you're gonna be by yourself at the end of the day. So I want you to know that you're gonna be okay by yourself. You know? And I was like, you just have to take that into consideration every day. Because then again, she's still like, was obviously you don't, you don't just get over a 20 year marriage just like that. So her still feeling the way she did and like being depressed and all this and this and that. I was like, you, you have the negative mindset right now, but you're gonna be okay. Just live like you're like gonna die tomorrow. Like I, I always try to say that so she could just feel better, you know. And at the end of the day it's just like, even if things don't work out with who you're with right now, you're gonna be okay.
- [48:03]
Alanized
Live your life.
- [48:04]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah, just live your life. Cuz she's very like when she's in a relationship, she was like this with my dad too. When she's in a relationship, all she does stay in her room and stay to herself. Like, obviously she's coming like downstairs talking to me and my sister, doing this and this and that in the house. But then at the like thing, she goes to her room like that's it. And it's just like, you gotta live your life like, and like all what everyone has to say about you being 39, going out. But at the end of the day, like, that's the age you should be going out. Like, I, I shouldn't be going out to this, this and that at 16.
- [48:38]
Alanized
But you should.
- [48:39]
Tessa Ortega
But you should because you're old enough. Like people say this, oh, why is Tessa wearing this? She's too young to be wearing it. And then when someone says, when my mom wears something like that, they're like, oh, why is she trying to act younger? This and this. Not. I'm like, my mom is the appropriate age to wear that type of stuff. Yeah, like Maybe people don't think that about me, but it's what I feel comfortable with. I feel pretty in, I feel confident in because I used to not be a confident girl. So it's just like people just pick and choose and it's hard. One thing I did wanted to touch on is like, even though me and my siblings went through like my parents divorce and like everything, it did hit my mom more because not did she just lose like her person of 20 years. Like my dad was financially supporting us and the family as well. Like my sister was too. Like, obviously because of social media and money, but he actually had like a consistent job. Like people don't understand social. Social media money is like there and it's not reliable. But losing that, it kind of was scary for all of us. And we were just like, what are we gonna do now? Like, it literally was a whole drastic change in our life to like, you know, settle or be good, you know.
- [49:43]
Alanized
Yo bia mente que les vado lera tia tu sermanos. But I feel like it's nice that you know, you're being there for your because alfindel dia the people that are going through a heartbreak are, you know, your mom and dad, orita to mama pienso, you know, because she did have to leave a 20 year relationship and she's trying to put back together the pieces of this broken life that she was left with.
- [50:10]
Tessa Ortega
Like me, I just got over like a six month situationship and I'm like, oh my God. Like I've been going through, I've been crashing out late, like, and just so I couldn't imagine, imagine like going through what my mom went through like all those years. Like I already know. She told me she was like mentally checked out of like the marriage five years prior. So she was like, not. It wasn't like as bad when the divorce actually like the written paper and everything actually happened. But I couldn't imagine like her pain that she was going through spending that much time and memories having kids with that person, you know, so it was just like, you're strong. Like she's the strongest woman I ever know, you know, I think it is.
- [50:46]
Alanized
A very tough situation to be in because to my mind, not only is she trying to put back the pieces to her broken heart, but that means she's trying to get it together for her kids. You know what I mean about the co parenting? How is that like, you know, do you guys divide days between your dad and your mom or what's the co parenting?
- [51:05]
Tessa Ortega
Not necessarily because on court paper, it is like 95, 95 me, like, my mom with me, and then 5% with my dad, because during the time, I did not talk to him at all. But now it's just like, whenever my dad texts me, like, hey, you want to go out to eat? You want to do this and this and that? It's just like, oh, yeah, I'll go. Like, if I have the time, I'll go, you know? But I don't really, like, push it as much because in the beginning is when it was pushed, and then it kind of, like, made us, like, it kind of pushed us away from him instead of helping. But now him not pushing it and, like, consistently, like, being overwhelming with it, like trying to basically kiss ass to us because of the situation. I think it's better that he's. We're doing that instead of like, oh, you have to hang out with him or you have to do this. This slowly. Yeah, it's like, it's just happening in the all matter of time, you know? So I think that's what matters the most. And I'm glad that it's not like, we're little kids and we have to do like, oh, him have me on the weekends or my mom having dinner this time, you know, so I'm just. I think it's just cool like that.
- [52:06]
Alanized
What piece of advice can you give to anyone watching right now that is maybe going through their parents divorce?
- [52:12]
Tessa Ortega
I think I would just say it will be okay no matter how hard the situation is. It, like, it. It's always gonna be okay no matter what. Like, time heals everything. And I think obviously you just need to let yourself feel that everything is happening, because I feel like a lot of people are in denial with the situation and just like, oh, I don't, like, I don't want this to happen like this and this not. But I think it's gonna be okay no matter what. At the end of the day, like, you guys are all gonna move on. You're gonna get older, you're gonna live your own life. Your parents are as well. Like, things happen for a reason, and if they weren't meant to be, it wasn't meant to be. And I think that's all I would say to, like, if I were to get advice to myself, that's all I would want to hear from anyone, if anything.
- [53:00]
Alanized
Yes. Muy Sierra. You know, I feel like time really does heal, and as you get older, you start realizing que si pues la relaciono trabajo. It's for the best.
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Tessa Ortega
Today.
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Alanized
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- [54:27]
You in school, Tessa. In school. Were you shy? Were you popular? Peloneta. How were you in school, amiga?
- [54:35]
Tessa Ortega
In school? Oh my God. I actually used to love school. Like going to like in person school because I was. Was. I would love hanging out with my friends. I love school. Hated the school part. I feel like that's everyone Love school. Hated the school part. Love lunchtime. I liked hanging out with my friends, getting lunch, going to the vending machine. Used to asking my parents for money for the vending machine. I think I was very. Since I was extroverted. I would see someone random and like be friends with them or talk to them. Like, I would push it too. I would just. I would say I was kind of the popular girl in a way. I wouldn't say popular. I was just very like, people knew who you were. Yeah. Who I was. Like, I wasn't like quiet. If anything, I love spending time with my teachers. Like, I would. Oh my God. I loved having a bond with my teachers. 100 like, I still have. Like, I literally still sometimes check up and email my. My other. My older teachers. My older teachers. Wait. My other teachers and would be like, hey, how are you doing? Like, I'm doing this and this and this is an update on my life. Like Social media has been doing well for me. Online school has been doing well for me. This and this and that. Like, it was literally not even on nothing weird or anything like that. I feel like some teachers, really, not even some teachers have an impact on your life forever. So if you had a good bond with that teacher, you're always gonna remember them. Everyone has that one teacher you're gonna remember. And that they mean a lot to you, too.
- [55:58]
Alanized
Do you feel like as soon as you started getting a following, do you feel like girls try to start problems with you or just in general people started treating you differently because of the following online?
- [56:08]
Tessa Ortega
I wouldn't say. I don't want to say, like, oh, everyone changed, started acting different towards me, like, you know, or anything like that. I think they would just. There'd be people just throwing on the word, okay, Miss famous, or like, stuff like that. Like, and I'd be like, you're like, no, it's not even like that or anything. So I feel like it was just like, small things like that, but nothing like, oh, I think I'm this, like, I think I'm the type. You know, I'm. It wasn't like that. If anything, no one treated me weirdly in the high school that I went to before I moved. Moved? Yeah, like, to my new house as of right now. Because I grew up with those people. Like, all those people that went to that high school went to the same elementary as me and my sister went. My sister and brother also went to that same high school too. So they already, like, it was a norm. It was like, oh, it wasn't nothing new to, like, oh, she's famous girl.
- [56:54]
Alanized
We've been knowing, like, something like, it wasn't like a big new deal.
- [56:58]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah, it wasn't like a big deal to them because they, like, it was kind of like a norm to, like, see, like, my sister and brother. So me not any different, but I think going to, like, the new, new high school that I went to as soon as I moved. People weren't like, like, used to that. I don't know, to be honest, because it was me and my brother, because my sister already graduated. And there was one time when we went to this new school and the first day that me and my brother went because it was like the end of the school year.
- [57:25]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [57:26]
Tessa Ortega
And as soon as we got there, there was like, people just, like, staring, and we were like, huh? Like, who? I don't think it's that big of a deal. Tick Tockers, if anything. And then there was like, people like in a class, like, recording us from the outside, and we were like, okay, that's doing too much. We ain't celebrities now. I'm just like, I'm trying to get my education. But I think with me, that had nothing to do with me going online. If anything, with me going online, that was just for myself because I. I did good in school. Like, I didn't do bad in public school, but I feel like I'm just like, better online because. Because I don't. Like I said before, I loved school, but I hated the school part. So being able to just like, be stuck in the school part kind of forces me to actually do it without being distracted. My old high school, I would just like, sit me next to anyone. I would chat up with them. Like, I don't care. I'm gonna make friends no matter what. So I'm not bored in class because I just, I was just like that. Unless it was like, like a table full of like, quiet kids. Then I'll. There was like one person at the table. I'll talk to them, you know, because I don't want to disturb the other people that don't want to be talked to because, you know, I' like, I'm not gonna be like that one girl. Why are you so quiet? You know, I was just gonna do like, whoever wants to talk to me, I'll talk to you too. Like, I could easily just like, read the energy in the room.
- [58:39]
Alanized
What was online school like? You know, how many days a week IBAs and did you ever feel like you were kind of falling behind? Because the only time I was falling.
- [58:49]
Tessa Ortega
Behind was obviously like, when I was going through everything. Because as soon as I switched to online school is when then my parents divorce and then like, all my drama stuff on Tick Tock was going on. So I didn't have like, them. Like, school wasn't my priority at the time. And my mom didn't like, have the energy to be able to tell me to get on my about school because she was obviously dealing with her own things, like with my, obviously with my dad. So it was kind of harder. But definitely now. Now is like, no excuses. My mom's like, this year you have no excuses. You, like, you're gonna be on it. Like this year you're not. I'm not going to hear anything. No absences. Like, because basically what I have to do, I have to join like a Google Meet. It's like 8:30 and it ends at 2:30. Yeah. And I. No. Yeah. I wake up like it's literally like a school day basically.
- [59:37]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [59:37]
Tessa Ortega
But I have to wake up at 8:30. Go to sleep or go to sleep, sorry, go to sleep early technically. But I sometimes slack on doing that too. But wake up for my classes, I have six period so I have to join six Google Meets. And then after I have to do edgenuity, which is like I log in and I basically they assign like three assignments every single day. So it's kind of hard because like if I don't do the three assignments every single day then I would fall behind. Which is why I try to keep up with it the best I could, you know. So I feel like that's the only thing. Nothing bad out of online school though. I would definitely recommend with people that. Two people that want to do online school because it's the best decision I've ever made. Like if you want to do stuff throughout the day, like go to the gym in the morning but you have school. But no, I could just join class on my phone and just do my online work later.
- [60:25]
Alanized
And then show your face sometimes you're like, no. So literally you can clock in and go to sleep.
- [60:30]
Tessa Ortega
Literally. Right. You know how we had our thing at school? My class started at 2:05. I clocked in right now.
- [60:35]
Alanized
Me, I'm like the teacher.
- [60:37]
Tessa Ortega
I had my phone right here.
- [60:38]
Alanized
I'm in class right now, baby.
- [60:40]
Tessa Ortega
No, they do know what I do though. And I like it's because sometimes like if I do fall behind and they email me that I if I fall behind, not like I'll explain, I'll be like, oh, I'm so sorry, I apologize. I was busy doing this and this or filming this and this and that. And they're like, okay, no worries, just catch back up.
- [60:53]
Alanized
Do they know that you do social media?
- [60:54]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah, actually one time there was one person that commented on my tick tock. They're like, because I don't go by my. They're probably gonna know now. But they. I don't go by like. Obviously it's my legal name, my school name, it's Natalie. So no one, I didn't really like think anyone was gonna notice that I was in class because I go by Natalie. I'm not known on social media for like Natalie. I'm known as Tessa. And there was one person that commented, hey, are you like, are you on like program? I don't want to say it because like the scary. But on the this program for online school because I think you're in my class. And I'm like, oh, My God. I was like, there's no way that I just, like, got recognized for being in the same class as this person without even showing my face or anything. But it makes sense because they probably put two and two together that I do online school. Like, my area codes. No, I do.
- [61:47]
Alanized
Oh, you don't even talk.
- [61:48]
Tessa Ortega
You don't have to talk either.
- [61:50]
Alanized
So you don't have to do anything.
- [61:53]
Tessa Ortega
Show up and have to do your work. That's why my mom gets on me so much, because I don't have to do that much. So if I. If I don't have to do that much, like, why am I falling?
- [62:01]
Alanized
Like, it's the bare minimum.
- [62:02]
Tessa Ortega
Bare minimum? Yeah.
- [62:03]
Alanized
So what is that? Like, you know, does it ever get hard to try to balance, you know, your busy lifestyle with school?
- [62:10]
Tessa Ortega
Like, a little bit. And especially since I'm a procrastinator, I'm like, I'll do this later. I'll do this later. I am a big procrastinator. But once, like, I get, like, in my mindset, I'm like, okay, I'm a lock in. Like, if I have this, like, if I get missing assignments, if I have this many assignments, I'm going to get it done tonight. Like, I'm going to get it done because I can't, like, because they'll kick me out. They'll put me right back into school. Like, I like the way I'm able to live because I'm able to, like, go to the gym in the morning if I want to go shopping throughout the day. I could just have my phone in my pocket and be logged into school class and then do my schoolwork later. Like, it's. It's an easy, simple life. It's not anything hard either. My favorite subject has always, always, always been. Even in person, school has been language and English arts because it was like, I don't know, like, writing stories and doing this and this, not, like, I love doing that. I don't know why, like, that would. That would be the only class I would be like, okay, locked in on. Like, no one's talking to me or anything. I used to love reading books, actually, but then I stopped because then I was just like. I don't know. I kind of got bored of it a little bit, and I wouldn't have time to, like, just read a book.
- [63:08]
Alanized
Like, it is boring, though. Like, I'm not gonna lie.
- [63:12]
Tessa Ortega
I feel like the only reason why it's not as boring is because you're literally able to create your own movie in your own Head while reading. So I feel like that's the only really cool thing about reading. And it helps with your grammar and stuff. Like the way you talk too, as well. And your knowledge.
- [63:35]
Alanized
Mas. What was the planning process like? What made you choose the color dress that you chose?
- [63:41]
Tessa Ortega
Oh, my gosh. It was actually very last minute. I do own my things last minute. Like my current birthday. Oh, my gosh. It was very last minute. I planned it in a week. I know it was such a mess, but that I. My quinceanera, I had planned like, for a month because I've always wanted one, but I didn't think I was gonna do it.
- [63:57]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [63:58]
Tessa Ortega
But with my parents divorce, they were kind of just like, I don't know what made them think, like, yes, let's go spend this much money on a dress. Even though we're doing all, like, we're going through all this stuff.
- [64:06]
Alanized
So it was happening during that time.
- [64:08]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah. So I was like, I don't know why we're doing this, but let's just do it. Whatever. So while looking for dresses, I actually was between the emerald, because an emerald is like. I don't know why I chose emerald. I forgot because my birthstone is ruby. So I don't know why I chose emerald. But I think I just like the color on me.
- [64:24]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [64:24]
Tessa Ortega
But I was between emerald or like this black dress. And to this day, I regret not getting the black dress because it was so pretty. But the emerald dress was also pretty as well. But everything was planned in like a month, so it didn't go the way I wanted it to do. We didn't do any dances, no photography, no nothing. I have nothing, like, no pictures in the dress besides that one picture I have posted or like, videos and tiktoks and stuff. So it kind of sucks. It wasn't exactly what, like, the dream quinceanera I've always wanted, you know? So I. I just feel like it was the worst time to like, like, planning. Planning.
- [64:57]
Alanized
Yeah. And I feel like you're also going through so much.
- [64:59]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah. So I feel like I shouldn't have just done anything and just did like a small little, like, get together with my friends and stuff instead of doing that. But, I mean, I don't regret it. I had a fun time. It was like, I gotta spend time with, like, my friends and my family. And like, I know for sure. I'm glad that, like, it. It did have to bring my parents together that night. It was kind of awkward, to be honest, because they were still, like, beefing with Each other. They had a little tension towards each other. They were like. But they put up with it for the night. So I'm grateful they did that for me. But besides that, it was okay. What I would change is definitely, probably I would get a whole venue. I would get a venue. I would change my dress. I'm like, oh, everything.
- [65:39]
Alanized
The whole thing.
- [65:40]
Tessa Ortega
I wish I could have waited at least a little bit, because I know people do wait after they're 15, and I should have done that. But honestly, I don't regret it. It was still cute. It was like, a little something for my 15. I did it. It was better than nothing.
- [66:00]
Alanized
But it wasn't always like that. Platos, what made you start wanting to do social media? And what was like, your first moment where you're like, you know what?
- [66:10]
Tessa Ortega
I didn't really, like, hop on social media like that. The owner, well, obviously the one, whoever started it, everything is my sister. She's the one that started everything. And I'm not ashamed to say that people are all like, aren't you sad? Like, your sister's the one that started you off this and this and that? And I'm like, why would I be sad that my sister started me off? Like, I'm grateful for. Yeah, I'm grateful. Like, if it weren't for her, then I wouldn't even be here, like, sitting in this chair right now. If anything, like, I'm glad I got to, like, have the opportunity, because not many do, you know? So if anything, obviously, she's the one that started it off. And as I told you, like, I'm not. I didn't. I didn't want to be on camera at all. I was very insecure. I didn't want to show my face or anything thing. I kind of just warmed up to it on my own because I think my middle school, because obviously covet is when I was, like, the most insecure, and that's when she was, like, pushing it the most. But after quarantine, being going to, like, middle school, like, knowing that people are gonna see my face no matter what, in person, I'm just like, might as well show people online, too, because, like, it's who I am, you know, My.
- [67:10]
Alanized
Sister'S gonna do it regardless.
- [67:11]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah, my sister's gonna do it regardless. I might as well just do it on my own. So I started posting myself. And then I think after that, I think it just started consistently just like, me posting and then me getting into that, this one online relationship. And then after doing my atm, like, and then after Doing my own thing. It just. I feel like everything was just all aligned and was a plan for me to be who I am today and how, like, how I am gonna be in the future to help me out. So I'm glad that I did decide to choose to continue and pursue social media just like how my sister did. And I'm glad I was able to have that opportunity that she gave me. Honestly, I never really had an aha moment until looking back and being like, damn, I had that because looking. I was looking at my old videos even before, like, I got into my trio and got into that relationship online, and I was like, damn. Like, I was pulling numbers without even knowing I was pulling numbers. And I was just. Just like, I didn't know. Like, that's so crazy that I was never. Because I would just post the, like, a video, see the comments sometimes and just like, whatever, I'm gonna scroll in my for you page. Like, I never thought about it like that because I was never used to it. So I think looking at it now, I'm just like, wow, I'm really glad I did what I did, you know? But I think during the summer, like, July 2023 is when I noticed that I was making money from it. And obviously a young kid, kid getting that much money in their hands, I was splurging and I was like, looking back at it now, I'm like, damn, I wish I never did that because I was making a good amount of money. So for me, like, for someone that has never been, like, had that money before, getting it would. And being like, oh, I could buy this, I could buy that. Like, I have the money now. Yeah, no, yeah, Literally. I think that's something that people did take advantage of me for, is me being as generous as I was, like, being like, oh, I got you. I'll pay for it. Or I'll, like, I'll do this. It's okay. I, like, I'm good. Like, I don't have no bills to pay, like, how you guys do or this and this and that. Like, you know, because I was friends with, like, older people, so I was like. I was like, I got you guys. Don't worry. Like, bills, as in, like, car payments or anything like that. So I was like, what's the most.
- [69:25]
Alanized
You'Ve ever spent in a week going out with your friends?
- [69:28]
Tessa Ortega
I try not to keep track of that, to be honest. I try not to too. But definitely, I don't know, like, during that time that I told you, honestly, I would spend, like, literally, I Remember, there's one moment I was at the Prada store, and I bought, like, the white product glasses that I have now, and I was like, okay, I'm gonna buy this. I bought it. And then after, I was like, let me just post this promo real quick. And then I posted it because I had the mentality of money always comes back. Yeah, I just posted it's gonna come back. And I wish I never had that, because that's the worst mentality you could ever have have. Like, for one thing, if you guys start getting money, never think that way ever, because money does eventually come back into your life. But it's better to just save the money off to the side instead of splurging, because that's the worst thing you could ever do. Like, you don't need designer. You don't need this. You don't need, like, all this stuff to make yourself look good, you know? I remember going into, like, the. I think it was the LV store recently, and I remember there was this sweater that literally looked like something that you could buy at like. Like, Ross or the mall. Forever 21.
- [70:30]
Alanized
Like, it's not always the cutest.
- [70:32]
Tessa Ortega
And I'm like, it's just for the name or the label for the shirt and that. I was like, that's so crazy for everything to be like that. Now I'm just like, it's not worth it at all. It's not worth that $2,000. Like, I still have, like, all my stuff. And I'm like, damn, should I have bought it? No, I'm. I'm glad I have it, though.
- [70:51]
Alanized
It is very much like that, though.
- [70:53]
Tessa Ortega
I'm like, over here giving all this advice, and I'm still that way. I think I was just thinking of, like, imagine if I had that right now. Know that's the only reason why I'm, like, saying, oh, I wish I didn't do this, this, and that, because I know I'm stable enough to know that I would if I were to get it.
- [71:04]
Alanized
Like, it's okay, because when I first started doing social media, I grew up. So when I started making my Money, when those YouTube checks started coming in the 21st of every month, but it was just more of, like, oh, I want to prove to my stuff that, like, all my life. But I feel like as I started getting older, I feel like the last time I got, like, a designer item was at all last week. It wasn't, like, recently. I think it's been a while since I've bought in, like, a designer bag. For myself.
- [71:54]
Tessa Ortega
Literally, I've hung out with, like, people that actually have, like, money, money. And those are, like, not even this. I'm not even trying to be like that. Those are the most stingiest people with their money ever. Because they are not ones to be like, oh, I'll pay for it or I'll do this. They're the most stingiest people with their money. And it's something that. It's just like, okay, I need to start. I see. I see why you got money. Like, I'm gonna be just like you.
- [72:15]
Alanized
You know, you and your family are known to always get hate. How do you feel when you get comments? For example, you know, mommy shaming your mom and how she parents that you dress too old for your age?
- [72:32]
Tessa Ortega
Honestly, I feel like. I don't know. It used to get to me, like, a very long time ago. I remember when I wasn't on social media, it used to get to me. And I remember seeing my sister take comments because I remember this one time, like, again, I was still developing, and my sister did a video with me, and she obviously, my sister has big boobs, and I'm over here. Like, I had a smaller chest than I do now, now. And we did a video together on her page before I was on social media. And I remember seeing all the hate comments and being like, oh, get her out of the video, or, oh, she looks ugly like this and this and that. I'm like, I think that's the only time the hate has affected me, like, the way I felt that day. But now I just again, like, I'm my only. Like, I'm my only critic.
- [73:14]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [73:14]
Tessa Ortega
No one could get on me the way I get on myself every day. Like, obviously, hate comments, they do. Sometimes they little. Like, they stab me in the heart a little bit. But at the end of the day, I think it's myself that gets on me more than anything. But I do the heat comments, like, kind of help me overthink more.
- [73:31]
Alanized
Yeah.
- [73:31]
Tessa Ortega
But I do know some hate comments actually genuinely want to help me. Like, I remember when I got my lips done the first time, it was so bad. Like, they look good at first until they literally look like. Like, bad. And I remember people making fun of me, and I'm like, oh, they're just hating. The only thing with that is, is, like, sometimes I think they're just hating to hate. But those people were genuinely wanting to, like, tell me to dissolve my lips, and I'm like, okay. And once I did do it, I was like, damn, that's What I used.
- [73:56]
Alanized
To look like was that process, like, super painful. Because I've heard that getting your lips dissolved is more painful than getting them done.
- [74:03]
Tessa Ortega
Honestly, I don't know. It did hurt, though. It did hurt a lot. And I remember being swollen. It was. I looked so it was not cute. Yeah, it was. Not it at all. I did not like it. But overall, though, I feel like the heat. Compliments, comments. I don't know, it kind of just pushes me more to be more critical on myself, if anything, because at the end of the day, I know I'm not perfect. And I feel like being on social media, I have to fit up to a standard. So with people saying, like, oh, she's so young, she's doing this and this. The only thing I've done is, like, nose filler on my nose and lips. And my nose is the only. Only because I've been insecure about my nose before I even got on social media. Like, I've always hated it. My parents, like, my dad. Dad. My dad could. Like, he. He wasn't even that close to me and he knew that I hated my nose. I think the only thing is I just tried fitting up to the standards. And no matter what people say, like, oh, just don't listen to the haters. Like, just be confident in yourself. It's hard when you're getting reminded every single day and you're on that platform. Like, I can't just put my phone down and just not think about what people have said to me because, like, this is my lifestyle at the end of the day. Like, this is what I do. Like, I know people will say, like, oh, if you can't handle it, then just get off. Like, I can handle it, but at the end of the day, I want to know, like, be confident in myself while being on the screen. You know, I know I just get a lot of, like, criticism of, like, me being young and doing these things at my age. Like, me putting up to a standard on social media. It feels like I have to keep, like. Like I have to keep up with it and people don't understand that. Like, I will always hold this. People will never understand how you feel unless they're in your position. So no one will understand, like, why I do what I do or how I live my life until they're in my position. At the end of the day, like, people could criticize me and say this and this and that, but no one will ever know, like, why I am like this until you're in my position and see why I Do the things I do because I'm not like a, like a horrible person to be dressing the way I do. I feel like there's just bigger problems in life for people to worry about. Instead of just me doing like dressing how, dressing how I want to dress and like doing what I want to do do, like to like my nose or my lips to just make me feel more confident about myself. Like, I don't think it's that big of a deal at all. I don't know why people get mad about it either. Because I mean anyone could get it if they want. Like it's the age of consent. Like I feel like if some a 16 year old girl wanted to do it, not pushing it on anyone because I don't think anyone should do it because it is a young age to do it at, but I just feel like I should not. I feel like anyone else in the industry will understand what I'm trying to say say, but me trying to put up with the standard. And there is times like where my mom tells me like, oh, you don't need to do this to the, like, you're already beautiful, you're already this and that. Like, you don't need to wear that. Like that's too much like, but again, I am a stuck up teenager where I'm just like, makes me feel good. I'm aware. I don't care what you have to say. This and this and that, like, and yes, like that is bratty. She still gets mad at me for it and she's just like, like, no tested this. And then I'm like, I hate the feeling of feeling control, controlled. So I'm just like, I'm gonna do it. And once people, like, even parents, like, I realized this with like other topics too. Like they get tired of it where they're just like, whatever. Because they're humans too. At the end of the day they're like, okay, whatever. I'm not gonna like try to change like what you're trying to do because I'm gonna do what I'm gonna do.
- [77:15]
Alanized
At the end of the day about standards and you know, obviously tu Cristes online, you've been in your sister's videos. Is the muy chiquita that do you feel like because of that you almost felt like you had to grow up faster to fit into like the social media standards.
- [77:31]
Tessa Ortega
I feel like the one that really, that video that I was telling you about about me developing like, obviously because I was little compared to my sister, I feel like that made me like I don't know, like, want to fit in or be older. Just do this and this and that. Not be older necessarily, but, like, just look good. For people to say, she's so pretty, she's like, she actually looks good, or, like, you know, stuff like that. So it's not necessarily me trying to act older. It's just, like, I need that reassurance. I need that reassurance within myself, too, because if I don't look in the mirror and think I'm pretty, I'm not gonna have a good day. Like, if your makeup doesn't look good, you're not gonna have a good day. Like, if your hair doesn't look good, you're not gonna have a day. Like, everything put together in one is just like, if I'm not the way I want to look, look, I'm not gonna live a good life, you know? Like, I'm not gonna be confident within myself, which if I'm not confident within myself, then I'm not gonna be happy.
- [78:29]
Alanized
Does tell you that you don't need all of this, you know, the makeup, the hair, the outfit to look beautiful, you know? Do you guys ever have combos, like, in person about stuff like that?
- [78:42]
Tessa Ortega
I think sometimes I feel bad because. Because majority of the times, it's my decision. Like, it's like, obviously, you need a parent to sign off, but I'm a bugaboo. Like, I'm like, mom, please, just this. Just, like, this is it. Like, this is all I want. Like, please, please, please, please. And that's. I feel like when you have someone just begging, like, multiple times, then that's when you kind of give in. And that's how she is with me. Because I, like, I even. I, like, cry sometimes and be like, please. Like, I feel ugly. Like, I just don't. This and this and that. Like, obviously. Obviously, she's always like, you shouldn't. But my mom wants me to be confident with my. Within myself. Like, I genuinely, like, don't. Like, if I tell her I don't feel pretty, then she's gonna, like, be like, okay. Like, because it's not like I'm getting any surgery done, but it's enhancing, if anything. And one thing about filler, it's able to be dissolved. So it's not, like, a big change in me. Majority, like, is my choice, and it is legal to do it. Like, anyone could do it if they wanted to. To, like, at my age. But it's just, like, people don't understand that, and it makes it come off. Like, they make it come off bad on my mom. But it's my decision. It's definitely something people like are okay with a criticize on because they're just like, I don't know, it's kind of hard to like even say because people are, no matter what, they're gonna say something about someone. And no matter what I do or say or whatever my mom is okay with or not okay with, like people are always gonna just be like talking, talk on it. And it's just like, okay, we can't do anything at the end of the day. So whatever you guys are happy or not happy with, then it's not like I'm not gonna care anymore because I'm gonna do what makes me happy. And as long as my mom is okay with it, then that's all that matters. I don't think anyone else should be concerned with it but me and my family. And my dad is okay with it too. My dad, he's perfectly fine with it. Actually. He does the same thing that my mom does. He tells me, you don't even need it. And I'm, I'm. Because I was telling him I wanted like a nose job cuz I'm tired of like once you get filler over and over on the nose, it makes your nose look bigger than what it is. So I was telling him I just want to get a nose job. Like I'm tired of like just feeling like having filler in my nose. Cuz you know, I've been insecure about it since I was like 10. And he was like, man, you don't even need it. This and this and that. And then he was like, oh, but you could go to like tj And I'm like, if you were to do it, there's like tj, turkey. And I'm like, okay. I also think it's because they grew up with me so they know how I am and they know I was very unhappy with that. And for him to know that it's like he was okay with it is only because he knows I'll be happy. Like. And I feel like that's how parents are at the end of the day because they just want you to be happy within yourself and like obviously you as a person. So I don't think it's anything like crazy like how the Internet makes it.
- [81:29]
Alanized
Seem name to be honest about social media, you know. Que paso El ano pasado. August of 2023 was a super hard year. Not just with everything that you were going through with your family problems, but Also online, I want to talk about the passport incident. Can you walk us through with what happened in your perspective?
- [81:53]
Tessa Ortega
I think immediately when everything happened, I was kind of of just like, freaking out in a way, and I had a whole bunch of emotions, like, going through my head. I didn't know how to handle it. Like, it was just a lot for me to control. So definitely I just, like, did some things that I regret, honestly. Like, if this were to come, like, to happen now, like, if that situation were to happen now, I would definitely handle it way different than I did during that time because I was definitely an immature thing to do. And I regret it so much. Like, till this day, I am so sorry for the whole thing. Like, I feel like the way things were handled shouldn't have been handled that way. And I wish I could turn back time and change how things went down, but obviously I can't. And the only thing I can do is just make up for it and learn from it and just become a better person at the end of the day because that's the only thing I can do. I have no control over time, so. So I think with that incident, it's just something that should have just never happened. And I, till this day, still regret having anything to, like, do with it. My whole for your page was just filled with, like, bashing me, and I just didn't. Like, I ended up filtering my for you page. But it was literally a trend to just hate on me. Like, if you want your video to do good, like, or to go viral or blow up, you just talk about it and then it just put caption on it, word it, anything. Like, the video would end up going viral because that's what everyone was talking about. Because to this day, there's people, like, I remember there's content creators before I met and now I met them that used to, like, hate on me for the drama and that are perfectly cool with me now. And I'm just like, wow, I remember during that time you guys were hating on me. But I. At the end of the day, I. When I see them and I meet them and I think about them, that I'm like, I understand. Like, I can't even be mad at them because it was a trend. Like, it was not necessarily like a trend to hate on me because at the end of the day, what I did was wrong and I think I didn't deserve as much backlash as I did, but it was a bad thing to do. The reason why I even took it is because me and my friend were curious about, like, if she was genuinely, like, the age that she was telling us, because we didn't know if she was the age that she was telling us or the other age. Age, which was a completely stupid and impulsive decision for me to even take a picture of. And I take accountability of that because I should have never done that even if I was curious or what not. Like, that's someone's personal information. I should have never even invaded it in the first place. And I feel like now, if I was ever, like, put in that position ever again, like, that's something I would handle way better than I did that day. And that's something I have learned from, and I will, like, that I've matured from. Like, at the end of the day, I am. I was a little girl when that happens. It was definitely a petty little kid thing. Like, at the end of the day, I still am a little girl, but I was not as matured as I am now. If, like, definitely, like, not as matured as I am now because I'm glad it everything happens for a reason. Because it did help me become the person I am today. To know. To never, like, react based off of my emotions and just do an impulsive decision and think before I do something else.
- [85:03]
Alanized
Ways nos that at the time, you know, when you did take the passport picture to be like, oh, you know what? Like, I'm gonna kind of blackmail you with it. Like, where your mind space was during that time.
- [85:20]
Tessa Ortega
I didn't even see any of the drama ever happening to me or anything. Like, I didn't see that all. Like, I think that was just like a done and did. Like, that's it. Like, nothing I did. I didn't expect that to expand or be anything further than what it was, you know, so definitely my intent was not to be like, oh, I'm gonna use this against you. I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna leak it. I'm gonna take it. You know, it was literally just the picture. That's that I wanted to genuinely know, like, if she was actually the age she was telling me because she was telling other people that she was 18, which, nothing wrong. I understand why she did what she did. Whatever. Like, that's out of the way. But I do 100% know that it was an impulsive decision to do and should have never even happened to begin with. But at the. It's just. I don't know.
- [86:06]
Alanized
And I feel like it's so important. And I love the fact that, you know, you're sitting down here with us and really taking accountability because. And they still don't take accountability. So it really does show a lot of how much you've matured and how much you've learned from the situation. That when you first uploaded, you know, the passport, you didn't really think it was going to like blow up and be as big as it was, you know, when you start seeing those TikToks, when you start seeing all those comments, all those posts, what was your headspace then?
- [86:42]
Tessa Ortega
I think at that moment I was just like. I don't know, I was kind of just like, oh my God, I don't know how to feel right now. Like, this is so crazy because then again, I had real life things to worry about because after I put the phone down or just get off my phone, I have another situation to worry about. So I feel like it did obviously like affect me because I was getting comments every day, like just being like, oh, Bob, this, this and that, like passport stealer. And it's just like, I wish you guys knew, like, that that's not who I am. That's not like what my intention was to be, you know. So I feel like you guys are like thinking of me wrong. Like, that's the only thing that kind of, kind of sucked about it is because people didn't really get to know me, you know, and it was just based off of that piece of information. So especially with people not knowing who I was and getting that idea of me is the thing that sucked even more that I hated. Because I hate when like, say if someone makes a rumor at you, the rumor of you at school and it's not even true. Well, obviously my stuff is true, but like, it just sucks that they didn't actually get to know you.
- [87:43]
Alanized
Yes.
- [87:44]
Tessa Ortega
Like, that's the only thing that sucked about it. I was just like, damn, all these people making videos and just like making fun of me. It's just like.
- [87:50]
Alanized
And I think a big part of that is because, you know, a lot of people for the first time were seeing you because of the drama.
- [87:56]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah. And I'm not like that at all. Like, that's why it sucked because I was just like, please, like, get the chance like me. Those. There's literally people in person that have met me and came up to me in person. That was all like, oh my God, you're actually like, you're genuinely so nice. I didn't expect that from you. And I be like, please, like again, take the time to actually get to know me and I'll like, be more Than, like, thankful for you guys to be, like, to even take that opportunity to get to know me. Because I promise, I'm like, it's not like that all, like, people think I'm a boyfriend stealer, password stealer. Like, all of that. Like, it's not. That's not how I am at all. Like, I promise.
- [88:33]
Alanized
Did the scandal affect, you know, your relationship with your friends, you know, family or even other influencers in your circle? Did, you know, notice anyone that you felt like you guys had a good friendship, kind of distance themselves because they didn't want to get the heat that was coming with the scandal?
- [88:50]
Tessa Ortega
Definitely. It was an eye opener and I'm glad it happened again because I'm glad everything does happen for a reason. Because it did show, like, a lot of people are there only for the numbers. And it showed, like, who was really there for me and who believes me, who actually got to know me, because there was other content creators, creators that have left my life or, like, have left in general and didn't want to film with me, do this and this not, or like, just all that in general because of that. And it was just like, okay, I see that you didn't really, like, you didn't with me. You didn't with me because of who I was as a person. You with me because of social media. And I know that because I know I'm a good person. And for you to not be cool with me and act like you weren't friends with me on social media is because. Because you were there for social media and because they know how I am as a person. So if they left my life because of that, then I knew their intentions with me in general.
- [89:48]
Alanized
With the people involved. Do you feel like you guys were able to, like, have off camera conversations and really, like, get past it, or is there still tension, you know, with the people involved?
- [90:00]
Tessa Ortega
Definitely. Like, your podcast is exclusive for this because people don't even know. Like, the Internet hasn't even forgave me. But she has. Like, literally she was over not even like a couple months ago, like, slept over and everything. And people are, like, so clueless to it because, like, we're cool, we're good, and people are still hating on me for that situation and like, anything like that. And it's just like, we're good over here. Like, you know, I forgot how it went. I. I think, I think it first started off because we were talking about something else. Like, it got. I think our names both got brought up in a different situation and I wanted to Clarify. I called her. I was like, look, I'm just letting you know now, like, we already know how the other last situation went. And I don't want it to be like that again, you know, because I know you know my true intentions. And then we ended up talking about everything in the past. We both, like, apologized to each other for, like, other significant things that has happened in the drama. Drama. And we just came like, it was genuinely little girl drama. And it was little girl drama that shouldn't have even been, like, brought onto the Internet. And it did, unfortunately. But it. We. I think I knew already that we were gonna be good because we were close. At the end of the day, me and her were, like, very, very, very close. Even though it did feel or it was put on social media, like, as us being friends, it didn't just feel like a social media friendship. Like, it felt like a genuine, real friendship attention. So I feel like people don't understand. Like. Like, just because all this drama happened, we did have, like, a real connect, you know, so it was. I knew we were eventually gonna, like, rekindle, you know, But I think I made my mistakes. I take accountability for it. She has, like, accepted my apology. We're good friends. Like, it's not anything too bad. That's why I feel like no one is. No one. No one understands that until you're in the situation. You're in the situation.
- [91:55]
Alanized
Do you feel like the part public judgment made it hard for you guys to have that genuine conversation? Because ob Internet, you kind of almost get influenced and you're like, you know what? You. I'm not even trying to talk to you because me and the Internet hates you too.
- [92:12]
Tessa Ortega
I think definitely now we know. Like, now we know how the social media is and how it works. Like, like, if anyone were to say anything like, oh, this, like, this and that, like, we know it's not true. But then again, before, when the drama was happening, I think definitely, like, the Internet had us against each other, so it was definitely harder. But now we know and we're both, like, we're. We both have some knowledge on how social media works with people and how they do things. Because there'd be like, clip, like Cheeseman page or clipping accounts that literally be putting like, they make you look bad on purpose. Literally intentionally. And probably going to happen with this podcast. Literally, it's probably going to happen, happen, but it's just they make things look bad on purpose to make that person look bad.
- [92:56]
Alanized
So they're to get more views.
- [92:58]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah. Or to get Reviews to make. And there would be people doing that with me saying that I was saying this and this even after the drama was done. And I'd be like, I could even reach out during the time I was like, I'm not even, like, what? I wouldn't even say that. Like, why would I say that? It's done and over with. Like, you know, I was just like.
- [93:12]
Alanized
How long after the situation did you guys have, like, a genuine conversation where you guys were able to, like, really sit down or even get on a call and talk about everything that happened and where you guys decided to, like, move forward?
- [93:26]
Tessa Ortega
I think it was this year, March 2024, like, came over and we talked about everything, and, like, yeah, it was just. It was just nothing, like, all bad or anything like that, or it was just cordial. Like, I don't think there was any hatred or anger or anything. It just felt like how we were. Like. It's kind of like when you, like, get back with an ex. Like, it just felt like how we were before.
- [93:49]
Alanized
Like, just pick up.
- [93:50]
Tessa Ortega
Picked up where we left off, you know, so it wasn't anything, like, bad or any animosity or anything like that either. Like, it felt, like, cool.
- [93:58]
Alanized
How was it like, when you guys would see each other in person? You know, when you've gone to an event that anyone else involved is gonna be at Siem Premiero TikToks, like, oh, my God. Or this person at and this person are in the same room together. What does it feel like when you guys are, you know, in the same room together? Is it awkward, or do you guys kind of just avoid each other? Because even though San Perdonado.
- [94:24]
Tessa Ortega
I think we're just, like, from a distance, we're like, hey, but, like. Because you know how cameras are and everything. But now I feel like I don't think it's anything bad. We're just like, hey, like, you guys.
- [94:36]
Alanized
Were both able to, like, grow from that.
- [94:38]
Tessa Ortega
Yeah, it's not like any beef. We're like, oh, when we see each other, that's it, you know? Know. But it's just like, do you ever.
- [94:45]
Alanized
Miss ATM and the friendship you guys have? And do you feel like if this wouldn't have been a public situation, you guys would still have been good friends till this day?
- [94:54]
Tessa Ortega
Definitely, yes. Like, I do, like, reminisce the bond that we all have had, and I think if it wasn't put onto social media, it would have lasted. But unfortunately, everything happens for a reason, and I'm not. I feel like we are good where we are now. Like, I do miss it, but I think we're good. Where we are now, like, all. Like, all of us. I know Mech is doing good in life. Like, she has her own things going on. I have my own things going on. Amanda does, too. Like, I think it was a good little moment we had with each other, but definitely now we're all living our own lives, and I think it's going to be like that for a little while.
- [95:31]
Alanized
Is there anything you'd like to say publicly to the people involved?
- [95:34]
Tessa Ortega
One thing I would say is definitely I would. I would like to publicly apologize, because I don't think I'm, like, put it out there yet, and I know this will be, like, more out there. I would like to publicly apologize and take, like, accountability for what I did, because I know it's wrong, and I know the people around me, we have already apologized to each other, and I just want to move past it, because at the end of the day, like, I know it was just, like, little kid drama, and it was. Everything I have done was probably not the best thing I have ever done, and it was very impulsive and stupid of me, but definitely will have learned from it and won't be doing that ever again or ever put myself through that ever again. Because I know I'm not like that, and I know it was my decision to do so, but it wasn't. Okay. And I just don't want to let this, like, one event criticize, like, who I am as a person, because I'm genuinely, like, not like that at all. And I just want you guys to take the chance to, like, know me as a person instead of going based off of that, because I probably promise one little thing in my life or in your guys's life doesn't define who you are.
- [96:38]
Alanized
So, yeah, I am really happy that you were able to sit down here with us and publicly admit, you know, because I think it is a big part of, you know, the moving forward process. You could have not taken accountability publicly, but the fact that you did it really shows a lot about your maturity, your growth. Y todo casa prendil des de esse momento. Yo se que, you know, comomano la vaza segur cagano, pero que, because we're all human. Accept your wrongdoings and apologize for them. And I'm glad that you were able to do that. Rumors, misconceptions, and a lot of talking, you know, when it comes to you, what is a misconception, rumor, or just a chisme you've heard about yourself.
- [97:40]
Tessa Ortega
There was one where it was like, this is all, like, a while ago, but there was a pregnancy rumor. And I was like, what? Like, literally there was like, I think it was Lalo. He is always trolling on the Internet and I don't even get mad at him for it because I just clap back and I'm just like. I remember making a video. I'm like, oh, being an old man, like, posting about a child, like, being pregnant. I was just playing along with it, to be honest, because I don't even know how that even came up, but I was just going along. I was like, okay, let you think what you whatever you want to think. And then people were like, you're pregnant. And I was like, no. Another thing is, like, BBL allegations. And I'm like, first of all, I wish. But the only thing is, is, like, I've been wearing a faja. And people. People have even said, damn. So you, like, sleep, eat and shower in that baham. Like, it's genuinely just the faja. Like, if you guys know Soul, Soul and Beauty care, not even sponsored, by the way. Like, it snatches you up so good and it genuinely gives that illusion of, like, making your body look like, oh, whole, like, BBL look. But no, I do not have any body surgery. I'm never secretive of, like, if I were to say I got something done, like, I wouldn't.
- [98:43]
Alanized
I wouldn't be like, no, you guys. Okay. I always love finishing with, where do you see yourself then, career wise? And just personally, I would say I.
- [99:06]
Tessa Ortega
See myself in five years doing better than what I am now. Obviously. Like, I want to still do social media, but I want to do more. Like, I want to put myself more out there, collab with more creators, like, hang out with, like, more on the other side of, like, you know how there's, like, two sides of tik tok, like Mexican tik Tok, and there's like, Whiteside tik tok. I want to. I want to go, like, in both worlds, like, and just put myself out there more. If anything, that's how I see myself being. Like, more. More up.
- [99:37]
Alanized
With that being said, Amigas, her social medias linked down below as well as on the screen so you guys won't miss any future episodes. And with that being said, thank you so much for being here and thank you guys so much for watching. And we'll see you guys in the next one. Bye, guys.
- [100:10]
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