Nonprofit Lowdown #360 – What K-Pop Demon Hunters Taught Me About Fundraising

Host: Rhea Wong
Date: October 20, 2025

Episode Overview

In this episode, Rhea Wong draws an entertaining and insightful parallel between the communal magic of a K-Pop Demon Hunter sing-along and the process of donor stewardship in nonprofit fundraising. As the high-stakes season of year-end giving approaches, she invites nonprofit professionals to move beyond transactional asks and cultivate genuinely meaningful, connecting “magic moments” for their donors. With storytelling, personal anecdotes, and heartfelt advice, Rhea encourages fundraisers to see themselves as facilitators of meaning and connection—both for donors and for themselves.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

The K-Pop Demon Hunter Sing-Along: A Metaphor for Connection (01:35–06:40)

• Story: Rhea shares her late discovery of the "K-Pop Demon Hunters" phenomenon, prompted by her neighbor Sid and the movie’s signature song, ‘Golden.’
• Sing-Along Experience: Rhea joins a Brooklyn K-Pop Demon Hunter sing-along (hosted by Gaia Music), despite her limited singing skills. She describes the remarkable transformation as 250 strangers become a unified, joyful chorus within three hours.
  • Memorable Moment: “Within three hours, a group of 250 strangers had created beautiful music...we came together...and created this beautiful acapella version of ‘Golden’. It was connecting. It was magical.” (05:40)
• Key Takeaway: The spontaneous, authentic magic of this event illustrates the power of shared experiences to build community—something fundraisers should aspire to create with (and for) their donors.

Shifting the Fundraising Mindset: Donors as Partners, Not Transactions (06:45–12:50)

• Problem: Too many fundraisers focus on the "bottom line" and treat donors transactionally, missing the human element.
  • “So many of us are thinking about the bottom line that we forget that there are people behind those checks, people behind those credit cards.” (02:22)
• Rhea’s Philosophy: Fundraisers should see themselves as facilitators of meaning, helping donors realize their own visions for a better world.
  • “When we are at our absolute best as fundraisers, we are not extracting resources...We are facilitators of meaning, not extractors of resources. That is when we unlock the real generosity. That is where joy lives.” (08:15)
• Danger of Generic Communication: Donors feel unappreciated and leave (“ghost”) when nonprofits use bland, untailored messages or only reach out when asking for money.
  • “When donors don't feel like they're important, when donors don't feel like their gift made a difference...that's when they quietly slip away.” (09:43)

The Disconnection Crisis in Philanthropy (13:00–17:17)

• Rhea references client Jacob Adams of Inner Spark, who identifies a broader "disconnection crisis" in society and philanthropy.
• Root Cause: Lack of trust and authentic relationship-building leads donors to ignore outreach and feel unsure about the nonprofit’s intentions.
  • “People don’t trust you and your intentions. And the truth of the matter is, they’re right not to, because so many of us are trained to be in this transactional mindset.” (15:09)
• Missed Opportunity: Instead of seeking a “magic bullet” technique, fundraisers must embrace authentic conversations—learning what truly motivates and drives their donors.

From Transactional to Transformational: The Fundraiser’s Privilege (17:18–24:12)

• Personal Story: Rhea shares her Chinese immigrant family’s background, where philanthropy wasn’t part of the language or tradition, but giving within the community always occurred.
• She recounts a poignant moment when her parents, due to required charitable distributions, seek her advice on where to give for the first time.
  • “For literally the first time in my life, we were having a conversation about purpose and meaning, which again, in my immigrant family, that is not a thing that happens.” (21:12)
• Insight: Facilitating conversations about meaning and values is a rare and privileged opportunity for fundraisers; often donors haven’t considered these questions themselves.

Embracing “Leadership in Public”: The Fundraiser’s Role (12:51–14:45, 22:00–23:20)

• Leadership in Public: Rhea positions fundraising as a form of leadership—a chance to demonstrate values in action, witness generosity, and foster real connection.
  • “When I think about fundraising...I think of it as leadership in public...you have an opportunity every single day to demonstrate your values in action.” (13:22)
• Fundraisers can unlock not just financial contributions, but deeper community and purpose for their donors.

Final Advice: Make Every Interaction Special (24:13–end)

• Call to Action: Before interacting with donors, pause and consider how to make the moment meaningful—not just for the nonprofit, but for the donor’s sense of belonging and purpose.
  • “When we bring the kind of energy and the kind of intention to an interaction, with the goal and with the purpose of genuinely connecting and genuinely wanting to create something good in the world, how might it change our interactions?” (25:40)
• Lasting Takeaway: Shifting mindset from transactional to meaningful, purposeful stewardship pays long-term dividends in fundraising and in personal fulfillment.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• K-Pop Sing-Along Magic:
  “Within three hours, a group of 250 strangers had created beautiful music...It was connecting. It was magical.” – Rhea Wong (05:40)

• Stewardship Beyond Transactions:
  “When we as fundraisers aren’t conscious about creating those moments for people...we miss an opportunity.” – Rhea Wong (06:55)

• Facilitators of Meaning:
  “We are not extracting resources...We are facilitators of meaning, not extractors of resources.” – Rhea Wong (08:15)

• On Donor Disconnection:
  “When donors don't feel like they're important, ...that's when they quietly slip away.” – Rhea Wong (09:43)

• On Transactional Mindset:
  “Frankly, most people don’t like to feel transactional...that’s why we have such a high level of burnout in our field.” – Rhea Wong (17:07)

• Privilege of the Fundraiser’s Role:
  “It is a privilege...we are so often afforded the opportunity to engage with people in this really special way and to unlock a sense of purpose, to unlock a sense of generosity, to unlock a sense of belonging and connection.” – Rhea Wong (24:46)

Important Timestamps

• 00:00–01:20 – Introduction & sponsor messages (skipped)
• 01:35–06:40 – The K-Pop Demon Hunter sing-along and how it inspired Rhea
• 06:45–12:50 – Translating communal magic into donor stewardship
• 13:00–17:17 – Disconnection crisis and the importance of genuine trust
• 17:18–21:12 – Family story: From scarcity mindset to first charitable giving
• 21:13–24:12 – Helping donors discover meaning and purpose
• 24:13–end – Final advice: Embrace fundraising as connection and privilege

Key Takeaways for Nonprofit Professionals

• Move beyond transactional tactics; aim for authentic, memorable “magic moments” for your donors.
• Don’t underestimate the power of thoughtful, tailored communication—it fosters trust and belonging, and keeps donors engaged.
• Treat fundraising as a form of public leadership and facilitate donors’ own discovery of purpose and meaning.
• Every interaction, no matter how simple, can be an opportunity for connection and joy.
• Remember: “Pressure is a privilege.” Approach each ask or stewardship moment with gratitude and intentionality.

Links mentioned:

• Gaia Music (Brooklyn) – Host of the K-Pop Demon Hunter sing-along
• Inner Spark (Jacob Adams) – Referenced organization focused on the disconnection crisis
• Rhea Wong’s Donor Growth Evaluation Call – For further support (details in show notes)

For more resources, fun invitations, and fundraising inspiration from Rhea, sign up for her newsletter at rhewong.com.