Anne Rice's Email With A Vampire with Mike Rugnetta

Summary

Podcast Summary: Normal Gossip – “Anne Rice's Email With A Vampire”
Guest: Mike Rugnetta
Host: Rachel Hampton
Air Date: November 19, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this episode, host Rachel Hampton welcomes Mike Rugnetta (of the podcast Never Post) for a delightfully gothic romp through a tale of New Orleans, Anne Rice fandom, and one exceedingly committed vampire roleplayer. Following the classic Normal Gossip format, Rachel and Mike trade thoughts on the nature of gossip and then dive into a listener-submitted story that mixes subculture, flirtation, extravagant costuming, and a twist straight out of a vampire novel. The story unfurls with theatrical flair, campy devotion, and the signature wit both hosts bring to every narrative.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

What Is Mike Rugnetta's Relationship to Gossip?

[04:55 - 06:56]

• Mike describes himself as a lover of a good story, albeit a somewhat reluctant participant in personal gossip. He's more at ease with "professional arts-related gossiping" due to his background in theater and media.
• Shares a story about his wife, a "world-class eavesdropper," who would send him out for gossip while she was pregnant, placing a humorous lens on secondhand drama.

"For most of my life I've been an artist...and so I'm surrounded by just, like, energy is high, emotions run high. People talk about other people because it's important..."
—Mike Rugnetta [05:57]

Mike's Personal Gossip Story: The Rich Airbnb Rule-Breakers

[08:17 - 15:30]

• Mike recounts a decade-old story: friends gather in the woods for an Italian dinner, including a couple (Scott & Annie) who flout every house rule, have loud arguments, bring dogs to a no-dogs Airbnb, and serve themselves oversized portions before anyone else.
• Richness and entitlement are recurring themes, culminating in Scott attempting to break into the house late at night and almost getting into a fight.

"These people have never, ever worried that they have maybe too much."
—Mike Rugnetta [12:04]

• Both hosts riff on how group trips often generate exactly this kind of gossip-worthy behavior.

Main Gossip Story: “Anne Rice's Email With a Vampire”

Begins 17:49

Setting the Scene: New Orleans, 1990s, and Goth Fandom

[17:49 - 23:41]

• Thomas and Lydia, self-proclaimed goths, move to New Orleans for grad school and find themselves on the edges of both the city and its goth subculture.
• Struggling with jobs and fitting in, they're invited to an Anne Rice-themed bar by a florist’s customer.

Entering the Anne Rice Fandom

[23:41 - 29:50]

• At "Louie's," Thomas and Lydia meet Marcus and Michelle, local goth royalty and Anne Rice superfans, who introduce them to the world of Anne Rice balls and extravagant costuming.
• The Anne Rice Ball, the social event of the fan calendar, is so exclusive and costly it’s beyond their means until rumors emerge about "Gabriel."

The Legend of Gabriel

[29:50 - 34:29]

• Gabriel is a mysterious, possibly real-life vampire figure—beloved by the community and rumored to have fangs, speak ancient languages, and exude supernatural charisma.
• Marcus and Michelle act both starstruck and dismissive at once, creating a "Mean Girls" style sense of competitive awe.

"I've heard Gabriel speak Romanian..."
—Marcus (as relayed by Rachel) [30:21]

• Lydia is "all in" when Gabriel shows interest, turning the situation from spooky fun to breathless anticipation and social intrigue.

The Spell of Gabriel

[34:29 - 44:21]

• Thomas and Lydia attend a Halloween party, crafting elaborate Hamlet and Ophelia costumes. Gabriel, dressed as the Count of Monte Cristo, singles them out in a way that feels both intimate and thrilling.
• Gabriel gives them a luxe, old-fashioned business card with only his first name and an email address. Communication follows; his emails are “filled with rhetorical flourishes from other times,” and both Thomas and Lydia become obsessed—sex life included.

"Not in my long lonely life, have I beheld such beauty."
—Gabriel (in email) [43:34]

The Triad & The Ball

[45:00 - 49:07]

• After weeks of lurid, historically-referenced emails, Gabriel invites Thomas and Lydia as his honored guests to the Anne Rice Ball.
• At the ball, Gabriel attends to them with seductive intensity (e.g., lifting a glass of champagne to Lydia’s lips, whispering at Thomas’s ear), culminating in a nightcap upstairs.

"Literally no one in the history of the world has ever had just a nightcap."
—Rachel Hampton [48:48]

The Twist: Gabriel Revealed

[49:35 - 54:42]

• The next morning, Gabriel is gone. Lydia jokes about feeling like a vampire. They email Gabriel—a prompt, elaborate response comes, but…it’s from “Beth,” Gabriel’s wife.
• Beth (real name: Ron) is apparently aware of her husband’s exploits but not the vampire role-playing. She’s outraged by the "satanic" elements (and the amount of velvet), declaring Ron shall “find the Lord.”

"There is no way this guy's name was actually Gabriel."
—Mike Rugnetta [53:37]

• The saga ends with Thomas and Lydia—after immense street cred and some confusion—choosing not to expose Gabriel/Ron to the rest of the Anne Rice community, maintaining plausible deniability and the mystique of the affair.

Epilogue

[56:57 - 57:59]

• Thomas and Lydia eventually part amicably, both leaving New Orleans. Years later, Thomas returns after Hurricane Katrina and glimpses a familiar, ageless man at the bar—a final wink from the world of the supernatural (or the merely camp).

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Memorable Quotes

• "Do you believe in vampires any more than you did before we started?"
  —Rachel Hampton [57:59]
  "I believe in precisely one vampire now and his name is Ron and he works as a mechanic on the outskirts of New Orleans."
  —Mike Rugnetta [58:08]

• "What God fearing man owns this much velvet?"
  —Beth [54:00]

• "Would current version of me hook up with an irritated guy if I knew that it meant access to the party? No, but I'm in my 40s...would 20 year old me do that? There’s so much to experience—probably, yes."
  —Mike Rugnetta [45:13]

• "If you wanna find a ghost in America, I think New Orleans is a great place to start."
  —Rachel Hampton [20:59]

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Timeline & Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:00 - 01:41: Opening appeals (ads/fundraising)—(skip)
• 01:55: Rachel introduces the episode, mentions previous collab with Mike, sets up today's guest
• 04:55 - 06:56: Mike outlines his philosophy toward gossip
• 08:17 - 15:30: Mike’s Italian dinner/airbnb "rich people behaving badly" story
• 17:49: Main story teaser: New Orleans, 90s, vampires
• 20:09 - 23:41: Thomas & Lydia's move, struggle to fit in, discovery of Anne Rice bar
• 23:41 - 29:50: Integration into Anne Rice fandom and the mythos of Gabriel
• 34:29 - 44:21: Party encounter with Gabriel, beginning of email correspondence
• 45:00 - 49:07: The Anne Rice Ball and its aftermath
• 49:35 - 54:42: The twist—Gabriel’s true identity is revealed by his wife Beth via email
• 56:57 - 57:59: Epilogue to the saga and final reflections

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Tone and Style

• The episode’s tone is irreverent, witty, and filled with affectionate mockery—of subcultures, youthful dreams of being a vampire, and the communal glee in shared, low-stakes drama.
• Rachel and Mike both toggle between empathy for the story’s characters and delight in their foibles, maintaining a playful rather than mean-spirited tone throughout.

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Final Thoughts

This episode stands out for its richly told story that blends theater kid nostalgia, earnest fandom, sexual tension, and playful camp. It’s a loving send-up of both the Anne Rice era of 90s goth and of the lengths to which people will go for status—and for a good party.
Ultimately, it’s a tribute to the joy of being young, dramatic, and in on a juicy secret, whether or not vampires are real. And it leaves listeners, like Mike, perhaps just a little more open to believing in the supernatural—or, at the very least, in the enduring power of a good story.

Transcript

[Rachel Hampton]

Hi, it's Rachel from Normal Gossip. In a year that's been really tough for public media, radio and podcasting, Radiotopia has stayed the course. As a community of independent podcasts, we.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Welcome new shows into the fold. Shout out to Proxy with Yohei Shah, Try Hard with Alex sujong Laughlin, and Only if youf Get Caught with Patrick Redford. And together we brought more than 400.

[Rachel Hampton]

Episodes to our listeners. Being a part of Radiotopia means not.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Just that we get support from radiotopia, but also that I'm in community with other creators who I respect and admire.

[Rachel Hampton]

I want to shout out Mike Grugnetta.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

One of the hosts of Never Post.

[Rachel Hampton]

He is one of our guests for season nine and he does such an incredible job. Being a part of this community extends.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

To the fundraiser itself.

[Rachel Hampton]

We split the money raised during the.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Fundraiser so your generous gifts don't just support me, they go to some of.

[Rachel Hampton]

My favorite shows like Articles of Interest and Ear Hustle. At a time when the industry can feel so competitive, fractured and isolating, it.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Is a joy to be in this together with other creative audio makers whose work I believe in.

[Rachel Hampton]

It would mean so much if you would invest in our community of creators.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

By making your tax deductible donation at Radiotopia fm. Donate two more important things. As a bonus, when you donate before December 31st, your gift will be matched by a generous PRX donor.

[Rachel Hampton]

That's huge. Your money can go twice as far. Plus, when you donate, you'll be invited.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

To our holiday mixtape on December 4th, where all the producers will share exclusive.

[Rachel Hampton]

Mini podcast audio love letters about our.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Favorite shows in the network.

[Rachel Hampton]

It's going to be really special and I would love to see you there.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Head to Radiotopia fm. Donate to support Radiotopia and our community of independent podcasts today.

[Rachel Hampton]

Hello and welcome to Normal Gossip. I'm your host, Rachel Hampton, and in each episode of this podcast, we're going to bring you an anonymous morsel of gossip from the real world. I hope y' all enjoyed last week's episode with none other than the youngest Nobel Peace Prize winner, Malala herself. If you haven't listened yet, then what are you waiting for? And if you have listened and find yourself wanting to know who Malala considers to be a better gossip, her friends or like, Justin Trudeau. Well, then, have I got a treat for you. Last season, Ciara and I realized that we had so much tape we had to leave on the cutting room floor because these episodes simply cannot be two hours long. I know you guys asked for that. You don't actually want it. So in our subscriber exclusive feed we are publishing some of our favorite behind the scenes clips, including some from our episode Malala. Like, she tells us about her first and only experience with Bede. Tell me you don't wanna hear that.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

You can't.

[Rachel Hampton]

The further away I get from that recording, the more I'm like, damn, how am I gonna top that? But don't worry, I've got at least a few more years of normal gossip left in me. And both Ciara and I love to compete with ourselves. So who knows what the universe has in store. While we're waiting to find that out, I have got an incredible story for y' all today. Like, this is one of my favorite scripts I've gotten to work on. And today's guest is a familiar face. For those of y' all who listen to the show I hosted over at Sarah called In Case youe Missed it or ICYMI. Back in May 2024, we collaborated with a show called Never Post, which is a podcast about and for the Internet we talked about what we called monocultural moments, which are these moments on the Internet that break outside their niche and end up being all anyone can talk about. Think like those couple of months where we thought Kate Middleton was missing or the Titanic submersible story from 2023. Yeah, that was two years ago. We'll link that collab in the show notes. I have a feeling y' all might wan listen to it after you hear how fun today's guest is. Today I am joined by Mike Rugnetta, a writer, producer and host of the podcast Never Post, which joined the Radiotopia network earlier this year. So technically our shows are like cousins or sisters or whatever you want to call it. Mike, hello. Thank you for joining me.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Rachel, hello. It is. It's an honor to be here. I am beyond thrilled.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yay.

[Mike Rugnetta]

And I'm gonna be honest, a little scared. But we'll talk about that soon.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Yay.

[Rachel Hampton]

That is the exact overlap I want. That is the Venn diagram space that I want all of our guests to exist in. Is excited and a little bit scared.

[Mike Rugnetta]

You know, I'm a rule follower at heart, so here I am. I'm just. I'm doing what I'm supposed to.

[Rachel Hampton]

Perfect. Perfect. I will ask you to kill the rule following part of yourself once we get into the gossip. Cause I'm gonna need you to be judgmental.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Okay.

[Rachel Hampton]

Okay. But before we get into that, I wan to ask you the question that.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

We ask all of Our guests, which.

[Rachel Hampton]

Is what is your relationship to gossip?

[Mike Rugnetta]

I love, love, love a good story. And I especially love stories about, like, people trying to figure it out. Like, people just having challenges, interpersonal difficulties, Even if it's remote, like a shared common goal, I really, really love it. But, like, there's like a certain aspect, I think, to a lot of gossip that's like, about people, deep personal experiences. And like, I think for me, that's like a sort of glass house thing. Like, I'm pretty private, you know, Like, I don't really share a lot of my business publicly. And so sometimes I hear someone else's personal business, and I'm like, I should know this. I should know this is like, this is not for me. And so it makes my skin crawl a little bit. For, like, most of my life, I've been an artist. Like, I worked in theater for a while now I work in media. And so I'm surrounded by just, like, energy is high, emotions run high, People talk about other people because it's important that you understand who you're working with and that you know you're gonna be on the same emotional wavelength. And so that, I think involves some amount of almost professional gossiping. So I think that maybe, like, I know how to gossip in like, a really narrow register. Like, maybe even professional arts related gossiping is something that I think I can do a little bit. Uh, but no, I'm not like a interpersonal friend's gossip. People don't really bring me gossip. When my wife was pregnant with our kid, I remember, you know, she would be like, you don't have to bring me food. I want gossip. I just. I want you to go out into the world and get me gossip. Because that's what I'm not getting right now, being out in the world. And I need. So I learned a little bit about how to gossip in that moment.

[Rachel Hampton]

I love that your wife was like, I cannot go out into the world and gather this for myself. So I'm sending you all out, my hunter gatherers. Get me the good shit.

[Mike Rugnetta]

She is, I would say, a world class eavesdropper.

[Rachel Hampton]

Oh, that's such a good skill to have.

[Mike Rugnetta]

We will leave a restaurant. And she'll be like, did you hear that conversation that was happening five tables over? And I'll be like, what? How were you talking to me?

[Rachel Hampton]

And also you're like, I was focusing on the chicken. The chicken was really good. What did you think about the chicken? And she's like, well, they were breaking up, so I don't Know if you want to lock the fuck in or not.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah.

[Rachel Hampton]

Me and your wife, I think, would get along.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I think you would. I think you would. She will absolutely be listening to this and, like, giving me tips about how to gossip better.

[Rachel Hampton]

Oh, please let us know what tips she gives you. Let us know her rating on your performance over the course of this show. I mean, you've told me now that you don't consider yourself a natural at gossip, which makes me very, very excited to hear the gossip that I've heard you have for me.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I do. I have some. Ooh, I do have some. I can't explain why I'm so nervous about this.

[Rachel Hampton]

I can tell.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I've been doing things in front of people for so long. Like, people are like, do you get nervous? I'm like, no. I never get, like. I get excited. Like, right now, nervous. I'm honored, I would say. This story, I think it's a really good kind of, like, character study.

[Rachel Hampton]

Ooh, I like that.

[Mike Rugnetta]

And this is one of a few bits of gossip that I am directly involved in. Like, this happened to me. I was there. Like, this is an experience that I had. When it wrapped, I was like, huh, that was wild. This is over a decade ago, maybe about a decade ago, some friends of mine and I rent a house in the woods, like, in the middle of nowhere, for another friend's birthday weekend. Just, like, hanging out in a big house together. And one day we all decide that what we're going to do is we're going to cook a big Italian dinner all together. So everybody has their little. Their job, and, like, we're going to just spend the day vaguely working on those things until we all get together at the end of the day and eat. Altogether, I end up being, as the person of Sicilian descent, I'm in charge of the sauce. I mention this only because, like, it's context for the fact that there's a point in this story where the details get hazy, because I have spent all day cooking sauce and drinking red wine.

[Rachel Hampton]

I'm already loving where this is going.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Great. Good. So, anyways, we're all hanging out in this house, and there's, like. There's seven of us, I think, including a couple, let's call them Scott and Annie. So they are here, right, for the birthday celebrations. They're part of celebrating my pal's birthday, but they have their own Airbnb. They're staying at a completely different house. And Scott is the heir to the fortune of a very old international company. And Annie, who was his Girlfriend at the time works in finance. I'm going to be honest, I think that maybe she worked in finance in the way that, like, people who work in crypto now say that they work in finance. You know, like, I don't know what she did. I get the sense that it was like, on the fringes.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yes. I have a clear picture in my head of Scott Nanny. Okay.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah. The only way really I can describe how they are, besides these details, is that they're rich. These are people who are rich. They conduct themselves in the way that rich people do. They're at this Airbnb, you know, we're all making this big dinner and they're both kind of doing their own thing while everybody's working on their dinner tasks. After a while, Scott gets a phone call from the owner of his Airbnb who, like, lives in the other part of the Airbnb. So Scott has two dogs and the Airbnb, no dogs allowed. The owner is calling and they're like, dog, you gotta get these dogs.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Like, this is against the rules. So he and Annie fight about this. You know, there's a pointing and a shouting and a whatever. He leaves, gets the dogs, comes back with the dogs to this Airbnb. That is also no dogs allowed.

[Rachel Hampton]

Okay.

[Mike Rugnetta]

As a rule follower, as previously established, this is. I'm about to go insane.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I didn't bring my dog on this weekend getaway for this reason. Eventually, dinner is done. Five of the seven of us have spent huge amount of time all day on this big, beautiful spread. Pasta, sauce, bread, salad, chicken, the whole nine yards. Multiple tables have been gathered and, like, put together. One of my friends spent all this time, like, putting out beautiful place settings and everybody lines up to get food. Who do you think is first in line? Scott is first and Annie is second.

[Rachel Hampton]

Wow.

[Mike Rugnetta]

And do you want to guess the size of the portions that they serve themselves?

[Rachel Hampton]

Massive, of course, exorbitant. They were like, this is a family style meal. I'm eating for a family.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I'm the family.

[Rachel Hampton]

I'm the family. Yeah. You cooked for me. Thank you so much.

[Mike Rugnetta]

This, to me is like the emotional climax of the story. Like, I didn't say anything. I had been sort of in orbit the whole day being like, wow, this is weird. And like, this is just such a way to behave. I'm at the end of the line and I remember turning to my wife and being like, these people have never, ever worried that they have maybe too much narratively, the story keeps going, but it just gets, like, weirder. And weirder, like, odious rich people. Details, like, they fight more. There was a moment where, like, he had to go back to his Airbnb, and by the time he had returned, like, some of us or most of us had gone to bed. The door was locked. So instead of, like, ringing the doorbell, he tries to break in through a window. And one of my friends thinks that someone's trying to burgle the house. So he goes down, and he's, like, ready to beat the shit out of this guy. And he turns the light, and it's Scott. And, like, they get in a shouting match because, of course, my friend is like, dude, what the fuck are you. Like, what are you doing? But really, it's the spaghetti that sticks with me.

[Rachel Hampton]

I love that you're like, this story hinges on this pivotal moment where this sauce that I spent all day slaving over was taken. And he was in the hand gesture was not distributed fairly, was not distributed evenly. And then you're like. And then later in the story, he did try to break into the house, but, like, that's actually not really that important. It's the fact that he ate too much of the sauce that I made for everybody. No, it's true. I do think it says a lot. I feel like it's so true. Those people, they never think they have too much. In fact, they're always thinking they don't have enough, even as they have the most. Like, they're always like, how do I get more? How do I get more? And it's like, babe, when does the more run out? Have you thought about that?

[Mike Rugnetta]

It seems like you're unhappy, and maybe the constant search and desire for more is part of that.

[Rachel Hampton]

Who could say? I'm not rich, though. But I do have suspicions.

[Mike Rugnetta]

The theory of mind here, you know?

[Rachel Hampton]

Yes. Yes. Wow. That is beautiful. I feel like there's never a weekend trip in an Airbnb that does not have some kind of story like this. Because once you get, I think, more than four adults together. Yeah, something's gonna happen. Something's gonna happen. And then dogs. Dogs that aren't supposed to be there. That's. That's a lot.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I'm like. I'm scanning through my available memory of, like, friend weekends. And, yeah, there's a story for every single one of them.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah. I mean, I'm gonna be honest. That's at least 30% of why I go. Cause I know I'm gonna have a story once I leave. I'm like, okay, beautiful scenery, and someone's probably gonna do something crazy. And it's not gonna be me. Cause I'm gonna be high. So I'm just gonna be watching. You're just gonna.

[Mike Rugnetta]

You're gonna be on the couch.

[Rachel Hampton]

I'm gonna be on the couch with my vape pen and a glass of wine watching what's going on. It's dinner and a show ready for the evening entertainment. No, literally, I'm like, whatever y' all wanna do. Good with me. I'm gonna be on the phone with my bestie. Once we get back, though, don't let you have it.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Set up a camera. Just whatever you do, just make sure it's in this general area.

[Rachel Hampton]

No, exactly. It's like, can you guys stay in the right frame? Like you're kind of going off screen. This isn't helpful.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I missed that. Say it one more time.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah, that was great gossip. And now I'm looking forward to my next weekend trip with four to five adults for this very reason. Cause I'm gonna come out with some crazy shit.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Make sure to get one really rich guy.

[Rachel Hampton]

And that rich guy will not be staying at a separate Airbnb. He will be renting the Airbnb that we're in.

[Mike Rugnetta]

See, you're smart. You've thought about this.

[Rachel Hampton]

You got a scam. Thank you for that beautiful gossip, Mike. Now I have some for you. Are you ready?

[Mike Rugnetta]

I had, like a wave of relief having finished telling that story. And now it's like, I'm back up to 10. Yes, I'm so. I'm ready and I'm excited.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

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[Rachel Hampton]

Don't forget to use our link so they know we sent you. There are two important things to know about today's story. The first is that it takes place in New Orleans in the late 90s. And the second is that it involves vampires.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Of course it does. Of course. Is there any story that takes place in New Orleans in the late 90s that does not involve a vampire?

[Rachel Hampton]

I couldn't say.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Okay. I'm so excited.

[Rachel Hampton]

I wanted to ask, do you have any prior history with vampires?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Well, I mean, only a couple thousand years having been one for. I mean, I love vampire stories. I am a self described mall goth. When I was in high school, was really obsessed with a tabletop role playing game called the masquerade that my friends and I, we never played it ever. But I think I read the rulebook for it maybe a hundred times.

[Rachel Hampton]

Mike. What?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah, it's just an old tabletop roleplaying game. Very goth in nature. Very 1990s.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Wow.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah, a lot of the memories of like what goes on in it have been papered over by just time.

[Rachel Hampton]

Oh, I'm sure.

[Mike Rugnetta]

But I can picture myself sitting in my friend Sean's basement holding the book, like flipping through it. So, you know. Yeah. There was probably a period of my teens where I wanted to be a vampire, either literally or metaphorically around a table with some friends.

[Rachel Hampton]

I mean, I don't know if I can personally relate to anyone who didn't at some point in their teenager years want to be a vampire who doesn't.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Want to be sexy and immortal.

[Rachel Hampton]

Exactly. Yeah. Okay, so we're in a good space. I think you were perfectly placed to get the vibes of this story. So Our friend of a friend today is named Thomas. And Thomas has just moved to New Orleans to get his master's in historic preservation at Tulane. His girlfriend Lydia is moving with him. They had met sophomore year in a student theater club. Thomas had played Hamlet while Lydia had played Ophelia. And they had been inseparable ever since.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Okay, so just immediately I love both of them, I want to protect them, and I want nothing bad to happen to them.

[Rachel Hampton]

Both Thomas and Lydia are super excited to be moving to New Orleans. They both identify as a big goth. Like, they're not drinking each other's blood on a regular basis.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Okay, an interesting clarification. My opinion of these two is not changing, but shifting.

[Rachel Hampton]

Mm, yeah. 75% of the clothes they own are black. The other 25% is like oxblood red or like midnight blue. So Thomas and Lydia are stoked about all the potential goth activities that New Orleans has to offer. Like, I don't think it's crazy to say that there's like real actual spooky shit in New Orleans. If you wanna find a ghost in America, I think New Orleans is a great place to start.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah. That aligns with my understanding of New Orleans that, yeah, if you wanna find spooky stuff, it's one of the places you can go.

[Rachel Hampton]

Do you believe in spooky stuff? Are you like agnostic or are you just like, I don't touch it. My vibe is I don't think about it and it doesn't think about me.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah, I don't think about it and I hope it doesn't think about me. When I was younger, I was definitely really into spooky stuff and was like really into the idea of ghosts and spirits and haunting and polterge and stuff like that. That's a pretty common fascination, or at least it was when I was growing up. Now I think I'm. Yeah, I'm pretty agnostic about it.

[Rachel Hampton]

Well, unfortunately for Thomas and Lydia, they don't really get into any spooky shit in their first couple of months in New Orleans. Thomas grad program is actually super intense, and he doesn't really fit in with his grad cohort. His classmates all seem intimidated by his bridge piercing, which is the one like between the eyes through the bridge of the nose. Apparently not a lot of aspiring historic preservationists have brid piercings. Who could have guessed? Not me. Meanwhile, Lydia's having a really hard time nailing down a full time job. Her undergrad degree was in art history, and turns out her parents had been right about the Career prospects associated with that. So it gets desperate enough that Lydia even applies to wait tables. But turns out even restaurants want their waitresses to have experience. Who could have guessed?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Who could have thought? Who could have thought?

[Rachel Hampton]

Who could have thought? Not Thomas or Lydia.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Poor kids.

[Rachel Hampton]

How long do you think it takes to settle into a new city?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Like, fully settle in? Like you've got a job and your house sort of feels like yours? I'm gonna say, if you're really fast. 3 months normal average time. Like a year.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah, it takes a couple months before things start to trend upwards for Thomas and Lydia. At the advice of one of his professors, Thomas does take out his bridge piercing, and that does help his classmates get used to him. Plus, Lydia finds a job.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yay. Good job.

[Rachel Hampton]

Technically, it is an apprenticeship, but the florist promised he would start paying her once Lydia was no longer a hazard with the pruning shears. Oh, no. So vibes are trending upward. And they start looking even better when one day at the flower shop, Lydia hears about this goth bar in the city from a customer who had ordered a dozen black rose. So the next night, Thomas and Lydia dress in their finest black clothing, and they head to this goth bar, which is called Louie's, as in the protagonist of Interview with the Vampire. Because this bar isn't just goth themed, it's Anne Rice themed. How familiar are you with Anne Rice?

[Mike Rugnetta]

I have watched Interview with a Vampire.

[Rachel Hampton]

Which Interview with the vampire adaptation?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Have you seen the first one with Tom Cruise?

[Rachel Hampton]

Perfect. Thomas and Lydia had Both seen the 1994 movie with Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise, but that was about it. So they're in a similar place, so they feel a little bit out of their depth. But the vibes of Louis are exactly what they're looking for. Like, the wallpaper is red velvet. There's not a single overhead light to be found. And the bar serves not one, not two, but three different kinds of absinthe.

[Mike Rugnetta]

You gotta have variety in your life. You know what I mean? It's important to have choice. And why not start with absinthe?

[Rachel Hampton]

Have you ever tried absinthe?

[Mike Rugnetta]

I have, yeah, A bunch. I've had a fair amount of absinthe in my life.

[Rachel Hampton]

What do you think of it? I'm so curious. I wanna try it so bad.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I think it rules. It's great. I mean, you know, it tastes like that kind of liquor. Like, it tastes like sort of anise y licoricey, you know, and it's extremely strong, so you don't drink a lot of It.

[Rachel Hampton]

Thomas and Lydia are planning to take a cab home, so they immediately get an absinthe infused cockt finding a table. And it's not long before they're approached by another couple. And this couple is giving Morticia and Gomez Addams. Like, the man is even wearing a black and gray pinstripe blazer. His name is Marcus. His wife Michelle has like the thickest, darkest hair that Lydia has ever seen in her entire life. And Marcus and Michelle are regulars here at Louis. In fact, they tell Lydia and Thomas that the main reason they had moved to New Orleans a decade back is because of how much they loved Anne Rice. So when they find out that Thomas and Lydia have only seen the 1994 movie, Marcus and Michelle immediately light up like kids at Christmas. Or like kids at the Nightmare Before Christmas, if you want to be aesthetically accurate.

[Mike Rugnetta]

They light up like a black light.

[Rachel Hampton]

Exactly. Marx and Michelle are like, oh my God, you're in for such a treat. Do you prefer hardback or paperback? We have signed copies. Are you free on Friday at 7pm so we can hand off these books. And before Thomas and Lydia can even say thank you, they have Friday evening plans to get these books. Whoa.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I would be a little scared. I would definitely be scared.

[Rachel Hampton]

Well, Thomas and Lydia are desperate for friends, and they're non denominational goths, so they don't have anything against Anne Rice. And once they start reading Interview with the Vampire, they're both like, hold up. This is great. But also, this is way gayer than the movie, which both Thomas and Lydia consider to be a plus. One of the things they had bonded over during that college production of Hamlet is that they both believe that there is textual evidence that Hamlet is, at the very least, bisexual, which is a thing that Shakespeare nerds apparently care a lot about. I say that because my best friend is a Shakespeare nerd. So finding out that Anne Rice's vampires are, like, explicitly gay only made Thomas and Lydia more excited to keep meeting up with Marcus and Michelle.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Okay.

[Rachel Hampton]

And it turns out Marcus and Michelle aren't just fans of Anne Rice. They consider themselves followers of Anne Rice. Like, a huge portion of their social life is dedicated to this fandom. And if there is one place in the world where you can fill your calendar year round with Anne Rice themed events, it's New Orleans in the 90s.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Much like the existence of an Anne Rice bar, this detail is almost unfathomable in 2025.

[Rachel Hampton]

Well, the most important event in the Anne Rice social calendar is the Anne Rice Ball, which is a real Thing, by the way, have you heard of it?

[Mike Rugnetta]

No, I haven't. And I am excited to learn more.

[Rachel Hampton]

I had not before this story, but apparently the Anne Rice Ball is thrown every fall by the vampire Lestat fan club in New Orleans. This year, as in 2025, marks the 37th Anne Rice Ball, so it's been around since before the Brad Pitt movie. The movie did not hurt ticket sales. Plus, Anne Rice was known to attend when she was alive. The dress code for the Anne Rice Ball is extremely strict. Like the website says, quote, if you are not in attire appropriate to the aesthetic and extravagance of our event, you will be turned away at the gate and no refund will be given. Tickets this year in 2025 start at $393.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Good for them. Will I be paying $390? Probably not. Will I be dressing up in accordance with the rules anyways, just in my house, maybe.

[Rachel Hampton]

I mean, listen, I love extravagance. So back in the late 90s, when Thomas and Lydia first hear about the Anne Rice Ball, it's still about a month out for them, but tickets are already sold out, which is fine because Thomas and Lydia are enjoying hanging out with Marcus and Michelle. All the events they've been invited to have been cool. There's obviously a lot of costuming in this community. So Thomas and Lydia get to tap into their theater kid roots, which is fun and exciting, but they're a long way from paying whatever the 1990s equivalent of $393 is. All of that starts to change, though, when they first hear about Gabriel. Mike, have you ever had, like a self destructive crush? Like, not enough to require medical intervention, but certainly enough that when you look back, you're, ooh, not my finest hour.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah, absolutely. 100%. 100,000%, yes.

[Rachel Hampton]

So Gabriel is apparently infamous in the circles that Marcus and Michelle run in. He has allegedly been anointed by Anne Rice herself. He leads tours in a New Orleans cemetery, and rumor has it that his canines are so sharp because he's had them filed down to look like actual fangs. Other people say he was born that way or reborn that way. Because, of course, this group of people is like half convinced that Gabriel is an actual vampire.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Okay, everybody, all right, Chill out.

[Rachel Hampton]

As Marcus and Michelle are telling Thomas and Lydia about Gabriel, it is so clear that Marcus and Michelle are trying to play it off like they're not that impressed. Except it just ends up giving that scene in Mean Girls, you know, where it's like, I saw Regina George wearing Army pants and flip flops. So I bought army pants and flip flops. Marcus is like, I've heard Gabriel speak Romanian and Michelle is like, Gabriel's actually fluent in 20 languages, including old English, Welsh, and Bavarian.

[Mike Rugnetta]

All the vampire languages.

[Rachel Hampton]

Thomas and Lydia are a little skeptical. But when Marcus and Michelle invite them to a Halloween party that is exclusive enough that Gabriel is rumored to be in attendance, it does not take Thomas and Lydia long to say yes. Thomas and Lydia super into costuming, super into Halloween. So they spend their whole week constructing their costumes and they decide to go back to their roots. So Thomas is dressed as a period accurate Hamlet, while Lydia is Ophelia. Specifically Ophelia, in that famous Jean Everett Millais painting.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Rachel Hampton]

Where she's like singing and drowning in the river.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I was gonna say the like. Like Hamlet. You could be gothar. It's not. Not goth, but like, you could be gothar. That Ophelia in particular. Nailed it.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah. Like, Lydia's got flowers twined through her hair. She somehow managed to make her dress look like it's wet. So they fit right into this Halloween party. Cause there's not a single dollar store costume in the place. Like, it is clear from the quality of some of these costumes that real money has gone into them. The room is full of velvet and brocade and swords that low key look like they could maybe actually do some real damage.

[Mike Rugnetta]

This is not a party of florists apprentices is what you're telling me.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

No.

[Rachel Hampton]

No, it's not. But still, even among all this finery, it is immediately clear who Gabriel is. It's not even his costume, though it is quite impressive. He's dressed as the Count of Monte Cristo. It's just Gabriel's entire vibe.

[Mike Rugnetta]

This is the first room that they've been in in months with a single down light. And he's standing directly underneath it, glowing.

[Rachel Hampton]

Exactly. The best way I can describe Gabriel's vibe is. Have you seen the second Lord of the Rings movie?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yes, but, like when it came out.

[Rachel Hampton]

So, okay, there's this part in the second Lord of the Rings movie, and I've got a visual cue here to jog your memory, but it's when Aragorn opens this huge, heavy door and it is a. A peak sexual awakening moment for a lot of people.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Oh, I get it.

[Rachel Hampton]

Okay, you said, oh, I get it. Tell me what you get.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I get it. Like the backlit silhouette of the attractive guy just shrouded in leathers with a sword and nice hair. The smoky air, the authority with which he does it. The heaviness of the door is apparent from the sound design. Like, it's sort of. It's like one of those things where it's like it's, you know, 25 frames or something, but there's a lot in those 25 frames.

[Rachel Hampton]

Thank you so much for describing that perfectly, because that is the exact vibe that Gabriel brings into this party.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah, you're like, this guy could open a door, let me tell you. And he is opening one right now.

[Rachel Hampton]

A door to my heart. Exactly. Gabriel looks to be in his late 30s to early 40s. He's got, like, dark, shoulder length hair that he clearly goes to great lengths to take care of. Like, Lydia's a little bit like, drop the blowout routine king. He's tall, like over 6 foot 2, and he's got these piercing green eyes that immediately hone in on Thomas and Lydia. Marcus and Michelle even notice as the night goes on that Gabriel's gaze keeps returning to Thomas and Lydia. Like, Marcus is clearly trying not to sound jealous when he's like, looks like you two might be the lucky ones this year. Lydia's like, what does that mean?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Oh, no.

[Rachel Hampton]

And this is when Michelle reveals that every year, Gabriel buys three tickets to the Anne Rice ball, which, if you remember, in 2025, cost $393. And he selects a couple to accompany him as his personal guest. And what happens after the ball? No one's ever really said, but no one's ever been disappointed.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Uh huh. Well, subtext.

[Rachel Hampton]

Lydia is immediately like, hell yeah. She's clearly trying and failing to play it cool. Like, her posture is suddenly incredible and she's like, artfully twirling some of the flowers in her hair. And she keeps looking at Thomas, trying to, like, gauge how he's processing this information. And this isn't Thomas's first bisexual rodeo. He's read about this before.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

Hey, everybody. My name is Bob the Drag Queen. And I'm Monet X Change. And we are the host of Sibling Rivalry. This is the podcast where two best friends gab, talk smack, and have a lot of fun with. With our black queer selves. Yeah, for sure. You know, we are family, so we talk about everything, honey, from why we don't like hugs to black Lives Matter, to interracial dating, to other things.

[Rachel Hampton]

Right, Bon? Yes.

[Bob the Drag Queen]

And it gets messy. And we are not afraid to be wrong. So please join us over here at Civic Rivalry, available anywhere you get your podcast. You can listen and subscribe for free. For free, honey.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

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[Rachel Hampton]

Thomas is admittedly kind of nervous when Gabriel finally approaches them. The night is winding down. The candles have burned down low. At this point, almost everyone has dispensed with whatever character they were playing. Not Gabriel. To introduce himself, he bows low over Lydia's hand. Enchante.

[Mike Rugnetta]

He says, no, absolutely not. Milady.

[Rachel Hampton]

Ass.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Gabriel.

[Rachel Hampton]

No. Lydia's taken like a semester and a half of French, so she's like, mm, oui, oui, ditto. Thomas can tell there are already stars in Lydia's eyes. Gabriel tells Lydia and Thomas that they're the best Ophelia and Hamlet he's seen since the original production at the Globe Theater.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Okay. Yeah. I mean, like, laying it on really thick.

[Rachel Hampton]

Lydia asks Gabriel how old he is, and Gabriel's like, you never ask a vampire's age.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I was gonna say he's gonna say, you can't ask. Or he's gonna say, you know, older than you think. Older than I look. Yeah. Uh huh huh huh.

[Rachel Hampton]

How long would you play along with this bit? Keep in mind, Gabriel is like, objectively really hot.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah. I'm gonna really take my cues from Lydia that, like, the moment that she seems even remotely uncomfortable or not into it. I'm going to try to break the, like the kayfabe or whatever, but I think I'm going to be really looking for that moment if I'm me. Not very long at all, probably. Probably like a few sentences.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

And then I'm like, so like, where are you? Where are you from? What's your real name?

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah. Not Gabriel.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Your parents do.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

That?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Huh huh.

[Rachel Hampton]

I'm here. Yeah. Nothing Thomas has read has prepared him for this moment. Luckily, though, Gabriel clearly has many years of experience, maybe even centuries. Who's to say?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Me, I'm to say. This particular kind of character I think is bothersome to me, like, as a person in the world. But Like, I want to make sure that I'm being clear that I cast no aspersions on Thomas and that if he's like. Like, actually, this fucking rules. Like, sure, dawg. That's awesome. Great.

[Rachel Hampton]

Well, the business card Gabriel hands them is straight out of the last century. Like, it's on really fancy, substantial card stock, and it's embossed with gold. And on the front is Gabriel's name. Just his first name, like, Cher. And on the back is an email address.

[Mike Rugnetta]

No. Uh, nope.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Mm.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Mm.

[Rachel Hampton]

Thomas kind of has a similar reaction. He's like, what? He like raises an eyebrow. And Gabriel sighs and is like, I know, but one must stay current. And with that, Gabriel sweeps out of the room, leaving nothing behind but the smell of lavender and old leather books. So you get home, do you send Gabriel an email?

[Mike Rugnetta]

I don't think I'm doing it that night.

[Rachel Hampton]

Ooh, make him wait. Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

You know, he's been around for thousands of years. He can wait.

[Rachel Hampton]

He can wait.

[Mike Rugnetta]

What's another email?

[Rachel Hampton]

Literally.

[Mike Rugnetta]

But, yeah, I'm probably sending an email if I'm one of the two of them. Yeah, absolutely.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah. As soon as Thomas and Lydia get home, they sit down at their imac, like the one with the big box on the back. Cause it's the 90s. And they compose an email to Gabriel, who responds in 10 minutes.

[Mike Rugnetta]

He was waiting.

[Rachel Hampton]

Red flag or green flag?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Green flag. Honestly, that is the most human thing that he's done so far. He maybe if we sort of imagine what he's thinking, wants to make an impression. Maybe he does really actually find these people somewhat impressive. Wants to hang out with them, maybe wants to sleep with both of them. Who knows? Who can say? And he gives them his card, wanting to be contacted. It's very human of him to be like, yes, they emailed me. And to be excited about it and to email back. I also think email etiquette has gotten more complex and weirder over the last 30 years.

[Rachel Hampton]

100%.

[Mike Rugnetta]

And I think that that probably didn't have as big of stigma associated with it back then. Now it's like you respond to an email immediately, and you're like, whoa, okay, hold on.

[Rachel Hampton]

No, literally, it's like, do you have a life?

[Mike Rugnetta]

So I think responding immediately at this time, it didn't suggest as much as it does now. Yeah, I like it. I think it's good.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Yeah.

[Rachel Hampton]

Gabriel's email is filled with all sorts of rhetorical flourishes from other times. He writes of how dazzled he had been by them at the party. Not in my long lonely life, he writes, have I beheld such beauty? He compliments the shapeliness of Thomas Calves, the slenderness of Lydia's neck.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Very period appropriate compliments. Yes.

[Rachel Hampton]

Like, say what you want about him, but Gabriel can write an email. You know, Thomas and Lydia are both immediately infatuated with Gabriel. After reading this email for two weeks, they're trading emails with Gabriel. Every single one of Gabriel's emails is like 900 words minimum. He is always referencing like the War of 1812 or the French Revolution.

[Mike Rugnetta]

High effort email. Okay.

[Rachel Hampton]

A week and a half in. Liddy and Thomas are both like, this is getting a little ridiculous. But also their sex life has gotten so much better since they met Gabriel. It's like they're in Hamlet all over again.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I'm assuming that it does not involve him. It is just his presence has sort of awakened something in them.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Okay. An 800 word email is a red flag. Like responding immediately, great. But like writing a novel. I don't know about that, but I'm supportive of his presence generally. If even being in his orbit is good for them.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah. How far would you take this?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Listen.

[Rachel Hampton]

Mm, I'm listening.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Maybe I don't like Gabriel, but I wanna go to the party.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah, that's a great answer.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Would current version of me hook up with an irritated guy if I knew that it meant access to the party? No, but I'm in my 40s and like, you know, I know who I am and I know what a party's worth.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Would like 20 year old me do that?

[Rachel Hampton]

Exactly.

[Mike Rugnetta]

There's so much for you to experience and you should.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

I think that that version of me is like, really giving it a thought. I'm gonna say it's likely.

[Rachel Hampton]

After two weeks of increasingly lurid emails, Gabriel form Emily extends an invitation for them to join him as his guest of honor at the upcoming Anne Rice ball.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Do you think they celebrated by like doing a waltz?

[Rachel Hampton]

Well, Lydia's like, do you know how many people want to fuck a vampire? Thomas is like, babe, you don't actually believe he's a vampire.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Right, Lydia?

[Rachel Hampton]

Lydia's like, of course not. That would be crazy. But then she's like, how do so many cultures have stories of vampires if there isn't some sort of truth to it? You know, like, Lydia's just asking questions.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Lydia. I mean, what did we replace vampires with? I guess banking executives.

[Rachel Hampton]

I'd rather have vampires.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Same.

[Rachel Hampton]

But Lydia's also like, thomas, I won't do anything you're not comfortable with. So if you don't want to go. We don't get. So you're Thomas. What do you do?

[Mike Rugnetta]

I think a lot of this is wrapped up in, like, how do I feel about my relationship with Lydia. Like, is it good? Is it strong? Do I want to spend a significant portion of what I can imagine of the future of my life with this person?

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

And if the answer to that is yes, like, we're going to. I'm going to do it. Yeah, absolutely.

[Rachel Hampton]

Thomas is, like, pretty much in the same place. He decides it's time to put theory into practice, with the understanding that they can always go home if they want. So. So our friends of a friend say yes to Gabriel, who promises to come fetch them on the evening of the ball, which comes sooner than either Tom or Solydia are really prepared for. Like, their costumes literally still have pins in some places, but nowhere visible, and that's all that matters.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah.

[Rachel Hampton]

So Gabriel fetches them, as promised, in a vintage convertible, and the night only goes up from there. Anne Rice herself is at the Anne Rice Ball. Thomas and Lydia never see her talk to Gabriel, but towards the end of the night, Gabriel's like, oh, we ran into each other outside the bathroom. She's just as enchanted with you as I am. And Gabriel is clearly enchanted. Like, there's obviously the usual flirty arm touches throughout the night, but also when Lydia orders a glass of champagne, Gabriel, like, delicately lifts the glass to her lips so she can take a sip, and he's, like, making eye contact the whole time.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Okay, but, like, what about Thomas Dawg?

[Rachel Hampton]

Well, then there's this moment when the live music gets a little loud, so Gabriel leans in close to Thomas ear, so Thomas can hear him better, obviously.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Cause it's loud, obviously.

[Rachel Hampton]

Gabriel's hand is on the small Thomas back. And right before he leans away, Gabriel kisses Thomas neck. Thomas is like, wow, this is so much better than I read about.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Good for you, Thomas.

[Rachel Hampton]

And there's an open bar at the Anne Rice Ball, so everything's coming up Thomas and Lydia.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Okay, all right. That's a blessing and a curse. Let's everybody be careful.

[Rachel Hampton]

Gabriel drives them home, they invite him up for a nightcap, and literally no one in the history of the world has ever had just a nightcap. So I'm sure we can all guess what happens next. You all can use your imaginations. This is not that kind of podcast. They do exist. So go find them. But this is my.

[Mike Rugnetta]

If you do end up using your imagination a lot, just write it down. You can go put it On Archive of Our Own. And then we'll go. We'll read it. Yeah.

[Rachel Hampton]

Please write fan fiction about normal gossip. Not about me, but about the characters.

[Mike Rugnetta]

And about the characters. We can come back. We can do a staged reading. I can wear a blonde wig.

[Rachel Hampton]

We'll take your theater background. I'll be there. What would you expect the morning after a night like this to be?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Like, if I were writing this, like, as a story and not as a recounting of actual events that happen, you would wake up in the next morning and Gabriel would finally admit to being like Tom Sullivan. You know, like, the next morning, he's a normal guy, and he's like, so you guys gonna. You wanna get bagels or.

[Rachel Hampton]

You like cream cheese?

[Mike Rugnetta]

You guys like. You want to get coffee or are you tea people? Like, the spell has been broken. You spent two weeks of lurid emails. Where do you go after that if you've already done it? There's gotta be a baseline reset. That's, like, the funniest result. I think what actually happened is, I bet he's pretty normal. My guess is that it's like, like, exactly the kind of slightly awkward, but, like, not horrible. Like, morning after.

[Rachel Hampton]

Lydia and Thomas wake up just before noon the next day, and it doesn't take them long to realize that Gabriel is gone.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Oh, of course he is. I should have. I should. I should have known.

[Rachel Hampton]

For a hot minute. Thomas is like, did last night really happen? But he and Lydia are both covered in bite marks, and there's a white handkerchief on their nightstand that certainly does not belong to either one of them. Lydia's like, oh, my God, the sunlight, it's hurting my eyes.

[Mike Rugnetta]

She's not hungover. She's a vampire.

[Rachel Hampton]

Now Thomas is like, babe, I'm pretty.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Sure you're just hungover.

[Rachel Hampton]

But Lydia is not to be deterred. She runs to check her reflection in the bathroom mirror, and she's like, oh, my God, you can barely see me. My reflection, it's fading. Except the bathroom light isn't on. And once Thomas turns it on, it is immediately clear that Lydia's reflection is unchanged. Thomas is like, don't you think we should talk about what last night means for our relationship? And Lydia says, don't worry about that. We have centuries to talk about that.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Lydia.

[Rachel Hampton]

We are almost at the end of our story. In an ideal world, how would this end?

[Mike Rugnetta]

In an ideal world, how would this end? Nobody regrets what they did. And Lydia and Thomas figure out that this is a thing that both of them are into. They both enjoy this sort of thing. And they are in a community of people who can provide that for them. And they both find great jobs and they both get healthcare in the 1990s in the United States somehow. And, you know, like, Gay Gabriel continues to be a figure sort of on the periphery of their lives. He opened that proverbial door and. Yeah, does not represent any amount of regret or shame.

[Rachel Hampton]

That's a great ending. This is normal gossip, though.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah. So I imagine.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah. So later that day, Lydia sends a breathless email to Gabriel, like, last night was a dream. We hope it's the first of many. Is this the beginning of our eternal night? Meanwhile, Thomas is like, can you ask him, like, what are we?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Could we put a label on this? Like, as soon as possible.

[Rachel Hampton]

I need to know. I need to prepare myself. They receive a reply within 10 minutes, which, again, not abnormal for Gabriel. And the email certainly sounds like Gabriel. It is unnecessarily long and flowers. But as Thomas and Lydia read the email, they quickly realize that it's from someone alleging to be Gabriel's wife, Beth, who informs them that Gabriel's real name is Ron.

[Mike Rugnetta]

That's almost the opposite of Gabriel. I mean, we knew the whole time, right? There is no way this guy's name was actually Gabriel.

[Rachel Hampton]

Beth is like, ron and I have an agreement. He can go to the city and do whatever he wants. Because apparently Ron doesn't even live in New Orleans. He and Beth live in a suburb of New Orleans called Metairie. So Beth is like, we have an agreement. I don't care what or who he does in New Orleans. But what I didn't know about is all this vampire shit. Beth is like, whatever you're involved in is unnatural. What God fearing man owns this much velvet? I don't know what satanic nonsense you're involved in, but I suggest you find the Lord, as Ron will be doing going forward.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Right.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Cause this was like, I mean, depending upon when in the 90s, this would have been maybe smack dab in the middle of one of the satanic panics. Fascinating. Open marriage. Ish. Maybe it sounds like, but the other stuff. Affront to the Lord.

[Rachel Hampton]

Exactly. You can fuck who you want, but not wearing a cape.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yeah, yeah. As soon as you stand under a down light, it's over, it's done, it's no more. You're cut off. You look at one piece of leather and I swear to God.

[Rachel Hampton]

So I do have some final updates for you, but before I get to them, I want to ask, do you believe this email is actually from Gabriel's wife, Or is this. This possibly some ruse?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Like, could it be him being like, here's how I get out of any level of commitment?

[Rachel Hampton]

Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

My impulse is to say that that is not the case because he is a fixture in this community, from what I understand. And if he understands that these people are also present and around, and especially if they are friends with Marcus and Michelle. Right. Who are around, then there would be reason for him to believe that he's, like, gonna see them around a lot. If he's not gonna completely, like, cut himself out and be gone now, he's gonna give up his. What was he, like, a cemetery tour guide?

[Rachel Hampton]

Yes. Cemetery. Yeah.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Like, if this represents a total shift in his lifestyle, like, maybe it's him. But it would be strange to send this if you think it's likely that you will run into them perhaps over and over again?

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

It's true.

[Mike Rugnetta]

So I'm gonna say it'd be likely possible that it's actually that Beth is. Well.

[Rachel Hampton]

Do you share this email from Beth with the rest of the Anne Rice community who have been watching Gabriel for years now?

[Mike Rugnetta]

Are you kidding me? Absolutely. Absolutely. I am printing it out on my dot matrix printer, and I am bringing it to Louise, and I am saying, hey, what do you guys know about this? Since.

[Rachel Hampton]

Well, Thomas and Lydia decide not to share it with them because they decide if it's real. They kind of feel bad for Ron Gabriel. And going to the Anne Rice ball with Gabriel had gotten them so much street cred in the Anne Rice community that Thomas and Lydia, they don't want to give that up. So they're like, we'll keep your seat.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

Ron Gabriel, whoever you are.

[Rachel Hampton]

The next time Thomas and Lydia see Marcus and Michelle, they just say they've been sworn to secrecy and that it's a night they'll never forget, which isn't wrong.

[Mike Rugnetta]

It's a very, very vampire thing to say. Yeah.

[Rachel Hampton]

It'll live in their memories forever. Thomas and Lydia do eventually break up. It is an amicable split. It has nothing to do with Gabriel, but they both end up leaving New Orleans. They're still friendly enough, though, that when Thomas goes out to New Orleans in 2005 to help out after Katrina, he sends an email to Lydia, and he tells her that he went back to Louis, which had miraculously survived, and that at the end of the night, out of the corner of his eye, Thomas could have sworn he saw a beautiful man with piercing green eyes who didn't look like he had aged a day in the past seven years. But when Thomas turns back around, the man is gone. And that's the end of our story. Do you believe in vampires any more than you did before we started?

[Mike Rugnetta]

I believe in precisely one vampire now and his name is Ron and he works as a mechanic on the outskirts of New Orleans.

[Rachel Hampton]

Yes, that ruled.

[Mike Rugnetta]

That was great. I still don't like Gabriel, but I am supportive of his existence.

[Rachel Hampton]

I support your lifestyle choices, Gabriel. Yes.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Yes.

[Rachel Hampton]

Thank you for listening to Normal Gossip. If you have a gossip story to share with us, email [e-mail] or you can leave us a voicemail at 2679, gossip. If you love this podcast, want to support us, become a friend or friend of a [e-mail] you can follow the show on Instagram and TikTok Ormal Gossip. You can follow me on all social media. Hey Danae H E Y Y D.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

N A E this podcast was produced.

[Rachel Hampton]

By Sierra Spragley Ricks and Jay Tolbiera. Our audio engineer is Samantha Gatzick. The co creators and dowager queens of Normal gossip are Kelsey McKinney and defectors supervising producer Alex Sujon Laughlin. Justin Ellis is Defectors projects editor. Jasper Wang and Sean Kuhn are Defectors business guys. Tom Le is our editor in chief. Dan McQuaid runs our merch store which you can find at normalgossip store. Tara Jacoby designed our show Art. Thank you to Brandi Jensen, David Roth, Katherine Shue, Serena Embler, Chris Thompson, Dave McKenna, Patrick Redford and Ray Rob for your help on this season. Thank you to the rest of the Defector staff. Defector Media is a collectively owned subscriber based media company. Normal Gossip is a proud member of Radiotopia.

[Alex Sujong Laughlin]

I'm your host Rachel Hampton and remember you didn't hear this from me.

[Mike Rugnetta]

Radiotopia.

[Rachel Hampton]

From PRX.