8: HE CHEATED ON ME WITH MY SISTER!?

Summary

Episode 8: HE CHEATED ON ME WITH MY SISTER!? Release Date: January 27, 2025

Hosts: Tana Mongeau and Trish Paytas
Podcast: Not Loveline
Description: A weekly love, sex, and dating call-in advice show hosted by Tana Mongeau and Trish Paytas, who bring their personal experiences to the forefront despite not being formal experts.

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1. Introduction and Hosts’ Banter

The episode kicks off with Tana and Trish engaging in their characteristic playful banter. Tana humorously critiques her outfit choices, aiming to present a "standing outfit" that highlights her appearance, only to joke about quickly losing the story once seated.

Notable Quote:

• Tana [00:36]: “Can I just. I just want to get. I want to rip the band aid off.”

2. Caller: Bleaching Private Areas and Cheating Concerns

Caller C reaches out with a distressing situation: her boyfriend has demanded that she bleach her private areas, using it as a litmus test for love. She also suspects he might be cheating with her sister, citing suspicious behavior like shared car rides and a used condom found in her boyfriend’s car.

Notable Quotes:

• Caller C [17:18]: “Is it normal? Because this is something that my ex requested of me, for a man to ask you to bleach your private areas for him, and if you don't, then he takes it as a sign that you don't love him.”
• Tana [19:23]: “Like bleach. I just, I don't even.”

3. Hosts’ Response: Dealing with Unreasonable Ultimatums and Cheating

Tana and Trish quickly condemn the boyfriend's unreasonable demand, branding him a "psychotic sociopath" and advising the caller to end the relationship immediately. They emphasize that ultimatums, especially those involving personal appearance modifications, are red flags signaling deeper issues.

Notable Quotes:

• Trish [17:56]: “Dump him, period.”
• Tana [20:31]: “The only solution would [be] him just simply passing away. Or maybe even just closing his eyes for a long time.”

4. Caller: Motherhood Without a Mother Figure

Caller C (a different caller) seeks advice on becoming a good mother despite her own mother passing away when she was eight. She fears that lacking a maternal role model might impact her parenting abilities.

Notable Quotes:

• Trish [13:25]: “I honestly think, like, you know, you'll be a great mom... you'll give more.”
• Tana [13:41]: “I think knowing is sometimes, you know what I mean?”

5. Hosts’ Guidance: Overcoming Insecurity in Parenting

Trish reassures the caller that missing a mother figure doesn't preclude her from being an excellent parent. She shares her own journey, highlighting the importance of self-awareness and the willingness to seek help when needed. Tana echoes these sentiments, emphasizing that concern for one's parenting skills already indicates a commitment to improvement.

Notable Quotes:

• Trish [13:34]: “You need to give as much because who knows where life goes.”
• Tana [14:05]: “And that's so sweet.”

6. Caller: Aversion to Partner’s Natural Smell

Caller C asks about being repelled by her partner’s natural pheromones and smell, particularly in the mornings, and how to handle this sensory issue without appearing insecure.

Notable Quotes:

• Trish [15:22]: “You can't be with someone you don't like their natural smell.”
• Tana [16:09]: “My house smelled like cigarette and...”

7. Hosts’ Advice: Trusting Intuition and Relationship Alignment

Tana and Trish advise that being uncomfortable with a partner’s natural scent is a valid concern rooted in intuition. They emphasize the importance of addressing such issues openly and considering the compatibility of fundamental preferences.

Notable Quotes:

• Trish [16:21]: “Dump him, period.”
• Tana [31:12]: “Like, the condom in the car is nuts.”

8. Caller: Age-Gap Relationships – Older Woman with Younger Man

Caller C discusses her recent fling with a 23-year-old she met during a solo trip to Hawaii. Now that the man lives in California and she has returned home, she grapples with the significant age difference and questions the sustainability of their relationship.

Notable Quotes:

• Caller C [22:00]: “He’s 23 and I just turned 30...”
• Trish [27:53]: “Don't waste time because it's like so precious.”

9. Hosts’ Discussion: Navigating Age Differences in Relationships

The hosts delve into the dynamics of age-gap relationships, particularly focusing on older women dating younger men. They discuss potential challenges, such as differing life stages and maturity levels, while also acknowledging that exceptions exist. Emphasis is placed on honest communication and assessing mutual goals.

Notable Quotes:

• Tana [27:53]: “Don't waste time because it's like so precious.”
• Trish [26:47]: “If you’re together, you have it together.”

10. Caller: Professional Cuddler Inquiry

Caller C seeks advice on how to enhance her professional cuddling services, hoping to incorporate Tana and Trish’s expertise into her business model.

Notable Quotes:

• Caller C [65:20]: “I’m a professional cuddler. So with that being said, I just want to know, like, what you guys...”

11. Hosts’ Thoughts: The Nuances of Professional Cuddling

Tana and Trish humorously discuss the complexities of professional cuddling, touching on boundaries and the emotional aspects of such services. They ponder the intentions behind seeking professional cuddling and reflect on their own preferences and experiences related to physical affection.

Notable Quotes:

• Trish [66:21]: “Maybe that guy has mommy issues.”
• Tana [67:14]: “Maybe I’d be the one initiating if they’re like, what?”

12. Pop Culture and Personal Anecdotes

Interspersed throughout the episode, Tana and Trish engage in lively conversations about various pop culture phenomena, including TV shows like "Wicked" and "Dexter," movies, and their personal obsessions with celebrities. They share humorous stories, express their fandoms, and discuss the impact of media on their personal lives and perceptions.

Notable Quotes:

• Tana [30:03]: “He’s the ultimate baddie.”
• Trish [35:00]: “I was born this way.”

13. Conclusion and Final Thoughts

As the episode wraps up, Tana and Trish reflect on the multitude of topics covered, from serious relationship issues to lighthearted pop culture discussions. They express gratitude towards their listeners and tease future content, maintaining their engaging and relatable rapport.

Notable Quotes:

• Trish [71:04]: “I should have just done it when I thought the app was going down...”
• Tana [71:44]: “We love you guys.”

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Key Insights and Takeaways:

• Trust Your Gut: Both hosts emphasize the importance of trusting one’s instincts in relationships, whether it’s about a partner’s unreasonable demands or sensing potential infidelity.

• Communication is Crucial: Open and honest conversations are vital, especially when navigating unconventional relationship dynamics like significant age differences or coping with past traumas.

• Self-Improvement and Support: Concerns about parenting abilities are met with encouragement and advice to seek resources and support, highlighting that self-awareness is a strength.

• Navigating Pop Culture: Tana and Trish seamlessly blend relationship advice with their interests in pop culture, demonstrating how media influences personal perspectives and relationships.

• Humor and Relatability: The hosts effectively use humor to address serious topics, making the advice more accessible and relatable to their audience.

This episode of "Not Loveline" offers a blend of heartfelt advice, candid discussions, and entertaining banter, providing valuable insights for listeners navigating the complexities of love, relationships, and personal growth.

Transcript

[A]

If you don't bleach your. You don't love him. He doesn't love.

[B]

No, he's exactly. Psychotic sociopath.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, I dated someone who I know for a fact. You, his mom.

[B]

The only solution would him just simply passing away.

[A]

Yeah. Or maybe even just closing his eyes for a long time. Hello.

[B]

Oh, we're sync now. You just think with every one of your co hosts.

[A]

Not kidding. Thank God. Thank God. Welcome back to Not Not Loveline.

[B]

We are not doctors. Although you look like one with those glasses.

[A]

Can I just. I just want to get. I want to rip the band aid off. Okay. I've realized that I keep picking out outfits for Not Loveline that are standing outfits. Okay. Look at me standing. This would need, like, a little pin in the back, I think. But I just want to show the audience.

[B]

You look so cute.

[A]

It's a cute standing outfit. But then I sit and we lose the story.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, no, see, I'm.

[B]

I'm with you on this one today. I'm like, have a phone between me because I don't know what's showing, and I can't cross my.

[A]

No, I'm literally. I'm putting this just Trish water bottle actually right where my cooches.

[B]

Just in case you guys, if you have not already subscribed, go to our Patreon. Patreon.com not loveline. It is saucy questions Too scandalous for the ones we have on here. So it's all things. We did a lot of. A lot of butt stuff on the last one.

[A]

And, like, weirdly, we would talk about, like, butt stuff, but then have, like, a really deep life talk and then, like, butt stuff. Deep life talk. Like, we got into it.

[B]

Inspiring moments in there too. It was really real hemorrhoids. Normalized hemorrhoids.

[A]

Normalized hemorrhoids.

[B]

Avoid seeing them when in certain positions.

[A]

We had so many girls calling, asking for the craziest stuff. I was, like, cussing on the Patreon. Like, I was mad. I was mad at these men out here.

[B]

The men are. Are awful. I think the whole thing is just dumb. All men.

[A]

Yes. Seriously, today I feel like I'm in crash out territory. Like, if we get one call from, like, a super boy, like, he's on a girl. Like, you might see me really freak out in today's episode.

[B]

I'm ready for it. I love Messy Tana 2025. That's.

[A]

That's where I'm at. Like, these women are just. These are garbage. And it's like, so true.

[B]

I'm living AI Robots. Come on in. We're ready for you.

[A]

So serious. Every single girl who called the Patreon last, like, I want to tell them, like, you would be better off dating a robot.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, the amount of these girls who are calling in just like, oh, my God, my boyfriend wants me to do this, but I don't want to. And he gave me an ultimatum. What do you ultimatum this?

[B]

The ultimatum was the stuff that they wanted them to do was actually insane, Diabolical. Yeah, I. Stuff I've never even heard of. I was just like, wow, his dad.

[A]

His brother, block him. Burn his house down. Actually, don't do that. Seriously.

[B]

But just satire as parody.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You haven't gotten into any scandals like that recently where you, like, say something that gets you canceled?

[A]

I don't think so.

[B]

The winery was two years ago, right? 2023.

[A]

Yes. Oh, my God.

[B]

2024. You made it through without any.

[A]

I forgot about the winery lady. Yeah. I should have just, like, not said her name. That was just like you said. This woman, no name. Saying that was a lesson learned that I should have learned.

[B]

Wait for the book, and then you can drop the names, you know, get the bag.

[A]

Yes. Oh, my God. It's like, I was thinking about that the other day, like, with my book. Like, if I'm telling a story that's so clearly about, like, an influencer, and I just give them a fake name. Like, what's the point?

[B]

There's not. Because I was thinking about that, too, when I was thinking about, like, writing a book, and I was just like, I can't say. Like, this boyfriend who I thought was gay, like, people are gonna know. You know what I mean? I'm like, let me just say the name, I guess. I don't know. Can they see you? I guess it goes through legal to see if they can sue you for it.

[A]

I was. The other day, I was trying to even, like, write them with fake names, and I was like, there's no way. You know what I mean? Like, oh, my old manager. And I'm just, like, calling them, like, Brent. Like, it's like, everyone knows it's all out there. Like, what do you. How do you.

[B]

Funny.

[A]

You know?

[B]

Like, he's on a show with you, and you're like, yeah, Brent. And like, oh, this is Brent.

[A]

Like, what's the point? I really don't get it.

[B]

I mean, to protect you, like, legally, you're like, no, that was Brent. But even that doesn't work. Like baby reindeer. The girl was like, found out who that show was about, and, oh, my gosh, she sued Netflix. I wonder what happened with that. I wonder if they ever got anywhere.

[A]

It was crazy how well they cast her. Like, no, just, like. And her voice and the way she was able to really become.

[B]

I wish that was my dream role. I wish I was casted as a baby reindeer. That would have been so great. I loved her. She. She won. She won. Like, what just happened? What was the award show?

[A]

The Globes.

[B]

Yeah. She just won a Golden Globe. I was like, good for her.

[A]

So deserved, though. Like, that whole show was like. I feel like a lot of those Netflix series are just, like, they film them in, like, 10 minutes and, like, you know what I mean? They're just, like, flops. But that one was insane.

[B]

It does feel like it was filmed in 10 minutes. I still loved it. It feels like it was filmed in, like, two weeks, you know, it probably was because it probably was, like, low budget. I think that's what always as well is when they're, like, sneaky, like, low budget, then they just do so well.

[A]

You know, that story is just nuts. And I think that guy being like, they really happening to him was so, like, just level. Next level.

[B]

Yeah. You know Richard.

[A]

God, he's a slayer.

[B]

I love that you know his name.

[A]

I like, weirdly, like, I love weird like that. And I get really obsessed. Rabbit hole.

[B]

Like, I know everything about him.

[A]

I really do. Richard, God, I love you. Please, come on. Not Loveline.

[B]

Talk about baby reindeer.

[A]

Honestly, he'd probably cook.

[B]

Did he win? He won, too.

[A]

I don't know if you want to act actor.

[B]

They want something together.

[A]

Like, best show at Golden Globes as well.

[B]

Small show. And Wicked won nothing. I know you're. I can't believe you're not a Wicked Stan. It broke my heart that Paige went by herself to see Wicked. I was like, are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?

[A]

No, I'm just kidding. I still haven't seen it, though.

[B]

You hate it.

[A]

No.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You think I would hate it?

[B]

Here's the thing. Hating it.

[A]

She just read me to filth. The thing is, is, like, whenever something is wildly trending, even if I don't think it's for me, I'm always down to try to get in the headspace and watch it. Like, I'm definitely down. And, like, sometimes randomly, I'm, like, converted. I've never. I don't want to say this because they're gonna. Please don't come from me. Musical community. But, like, I. I just. I've always had trouble getting into musicals.

[B]

Crazy.

[A]

I know that's like, isn't that. But maybe I've just. I've honestly also never really seen anyone's other than High School the Musical. Like maybe I just need to watch it and I would love it because I love music.

[B]

Majority of people don't like musicals. I think it is actually very niche. They don't market movies for that reason. So like Mean Girls was marketed as not a musical. And then when people went to go see it they're like, what the. Is music in it? Because people don't like. Did you watch Mean Girls the musical?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And people hated it because like we didn't know this was a freaking musical. Wicked is like a weird. Like a weird one that like it did so well in the box office. But in general I also watched all.

[A]

Of the press tour. I watched every single interview of Cynthia, Cynthia and Ariana. So it's kind of like diva. Go watch the film. You know what I mean?

[B]

And the fact that you know their names with Cynthia's very just like Broadway musical theater.

[A]

And I love that like every interview of hers I watch in full and I love her. So I need to give it a fair chance, I think and go watch it. I also just suck at three hour movies. I've never seen Titanic. I've never seen Interstellar. I've never seen like any of the long Interstellar. But yeah, people love Interstellar.

[B]

Never.

[A]

I've never seen it.

[B]

Galactic World or what.

[A]

I need to just take the biggest Adderall and knock out every three hour movie ever.

[B]

Let's start with at least Wicked. You think she'll hate it? I don't know. I love it. But there are people at know that don't like it and I'm just like.

[A]

I don't think I watched it in full. It's like none of it is even hello. Like AI Right. Like it's all like they built those sets. There's no way I'm going to watch it and be like, oh, that's not like it's probably insane. I just really haven't.

[B]

It's, you know, I love it. You need to watch it.

[A]

I'll watch it and I'll come back to you with my review.

[B]

What is.

[A]

Why did I really want you to watch. You haven't seen oh, Sex in the City. We could do that's probably the same amount of time.

[B]

A swap. Okay. A movie or the show?

[A]

The show the movies. They kind of lost the plot towards the end.

[B]

Okay, so I'll Watch, like, the first season. I don't know. That's. You want to see clips on Tick Tock? I'm like, this is painful.

[A]

It is like, Carrie Bradshaw. Like, she makes you want to bang your head in a brick wall.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But, like, yeah, that's it.

[B]

We'll try. We'll try. I'll try it. What are you watching? Wicked.

[A]

Honestly, I will. I want to go see Timothee Chalamet as Bob Dylan.

[B]

So bad random for you.

[A]

No, I love Bob Dylan weirdly. Like, I do.

[B]

I don't know any Bob Dylan song. What is he saying?

[A]

He sings, like. What is it? Like a Rolling Stone. He sings like Shelter from the Storm voice.

[B]

Right? Like, not a great voice.

[A]

Camp, bad voice. But, like, very folky. Like, I love him in his little harmonica. I also just love his aesthetic and his lore. Like, I think he was the first, like, cigarette. Looks like he eats cigarettes. Like, dying. Singing with the guitar.

[B]

Like, oh, he's the first. Like, yeah, Death rock star.

[A]

Yes. Like, he just, like, set the precedent for that. I love Timothy.

[B]

Yeah, I'm on the Timothy Chalamet bandwagon. I don't know anything about Bob Dylan. However, when I watch biopics, I tend to start loving that person. Like, when I saw the Queen one, I was like, lovely.

[A]

I realized today I'm a biopic girl. Paige was like, letting me know that I didn't even know that about myself.

[B]

What? Where's the biopic you were watching?

[A]

I was so obsessed with Austin Butler as Elvis. It was, like, genuinely concerning. No one would go see it with me. So I rented a movie theater and forced everyone I know to go watch it.

[B]

I watched it five times in theaters.

[A]

My friends all hate movies in theaters. And I, like, it's my biggest ick lately.

[B]

I'm like, you people, go get popcorn. It's so good.

[A]

I know today.

[B]

Today was National Popcorn Day. You could have brought a bucket or a box and they would fill it up with popcorn.

[A]

Wait, so we have to go. We have to go on National Popcorn Day.

[B]

Can we put it back to back?

[A]

We could do Wicked and a complete unknown.

[B]

Yeah. No, I want to see no Spratu. I love Lily Rose. What's that?

[A]

Me too. I am like, a Lily Rose Depp.

[B]

Apologist obsessed with her.

[A]

That's one of the, like, we were just talking about how, like, I need to stop commenting back on Tick Tock. Like, I don't have a plat, but sometimes I literally want to, like, fight people in the comments for coming out. Lily rose up so Hard same.

[B]

She's not. Don't call her a Nepo baby. That's so disrespectful.

[A]

I'm just in love with her. Just.

[B]

I am too.

[A]

She's trench coat button to the top. I'm so sick of people cooking her like she served.

[B]

I love the flats.

[A]

I loved the little. I love Lily Rosedep.

[B]

And she is queen. Maybe she'll come on now. So what's.

[A]

What's Nosferatu? Like, what happens in it?

[B]

It's like, I don't know. What does happen from all these niche communities? I don't know either. I just want to see it because she's in it. I have no idea.

[A]

Basically, like, I don't know how much to give away without giving away the entire plot, but lily rose stuff. 1800s. Oh, she's judging me. Count Orlok, he's like a vampire, basically. Like they have like sex telepathically. Like I can't even explain it. And he just like, wants her so bad. She's like under his this like, spell. And like I've always.

[B]

Yeah. Who is that? Who? Which one? Who plays him?

[A]

He's a vampire. Who is. I'm pretty sure it was like the author of.

[B]

Is it. Is it not Nicholas Cage? Why do I think this Cage is.

[A]

No, it's Bill Skarsgard.

[B]

Oh, who's in those? Cage. He's not in any of these movies. Why do I feel like he's in.

[A]

Oh, he was like supposed to be in something.

[B]

Hold on. Okay. I don't know.

[A]

I know what you're talking about.

[B]

Why don't I confuse like just being an old man and something. I love Nicholas Cage. No shade.

[A]

But do you love him?

[B]

Yeah. Oh, long legs might have been the one. Cuz I used to be in everything when I was a kid growing up, I was like, what happened to him? And then I like looked him up on IMDb and he's in like 50 movies.

[A]

What's his most popular movie?

[B]

Nicholas Cage. Oh, Face Off.

[A]

They Stole the Declaration.

[B]

Con Air. Oh.

[A]

Night at the Museum.

[B]

National Treasure.

[A]

Okay, I really feel like eight different movie communities are about to cook me in the comments. Listen, I am able and willing. I will watch. Watch anything. And I usually like pretty much everything I watch.

[B]

So Nicholas Cage is good. Yeah. We'll watch Wicked. I'll watch Sex in the City. I don't know.

[A]

Sometimes I can see you like, loving to cosplay as Sex in the City. Like the outfits. Oh my God, the shoes in that show is let alone enough reason to Watch it. Honestly, I'm gonna give it a go.

[B]

I'll give it a try.

[A]

Yeah, the outfits are everything, really. They really are. I could see you having, like, a whole, like, Sex and the City cosplay moment.

[B]

I need a new hyper fixation.

[A]

And then I just come in and I'm green. Like, honestly, I'm gonna be cosplaying fully after Wicked.

[B]

Fully Wicked. Honestly, two months later. I love it. Well, it's gonna come out again, so you'll have a second movie to watch.

[A]

I'm excited.

[B]

We love Wicked. Sponsored by Wicked.

[A]

Come on.

[C]

Hi, Christian. Tana. I need some advice about motherhood. So I guess this is more for Trish. I'm 25 years old, and my mom passed away when I was 8, so I wasn't really raised with a mom in my house. And I'm starting to talk with my boyfriend about having kids and stuff. And I just wanted to ask, like, is a lot of. Does a lot of it come naturally? Like, I'm really worried about not being able to be a good mom because I didn't have my mom in my life for so long. So. Yeah. What do you think? Do you think that I should start hitting the books now, or do you think that a lot of it comes naturally and it depends on the people you're around? Thank you so much. Love you guys.

[B]

We love you.

[A]

We love you.

[B]

I honestly think, like, you know, you'll be a great mom. Like, your mom's passing, I don't think we'll have. And if anything, I think you'll, like, be a great mom, like, because of that. Like, you know. You know how precious time is. You know how valuable it is, even just having your mom, however long you have her for. So I think you'll be a great mom because of that. Honestly, you'll, like, give more. I mean, for me, it didn't come naturally, but I will say I'm two years deep now from having my first two and a half years, and now it's, like, so natural and so wonderful. I'm like, oh, my God, what did I ever do before this little person? But if it doesn't come naturally, there's so many resources, there's so many people that'll help you because you'll want to. You'll. I think a good mother is someone who, like, knows when they're not doing, like, who just wants to do good. Do you know what I mean? I feel like I knew I wasn't. I was feeling selfish, I was feeling resentment. I knew I needed to get help. Which I think made me a good mom. Right? You like know when to get help and when to ask for help. So I think you just even worrying about if you're a good mom will make you a good mom, you know what I mean?

[A]

That was literally so beautiful. No notes on that one, diva.

[B]

Yeah, because we just talked about this, right? We're talking about on camera on the last one. Like, yeah, like how you were like, oh, I don't know. And it's.

[A]

I think knowing is sometimes, you know what I mean? Like worrying about if you're going to be a good mom kind of essentially is already saying that you are, you know, that you are going to be just in everything worrying about if you're a good girlfriend, a good partner, a good friend, like that is. That's step one.

[B]

That means you're good. The fact that you're worried about it.

[A]

So many people never do and then think that they're amazing and they're awful. And that's usually like where the problems lie, you know?

[B]

No, I think that is what you.

[A]

Said about time being. Sorry to cut you off. About like time being so valuable. Like, that's like she's so aware of that. And that's so true.

[B]

Oh my gosh. Yeah. I couldn't even imagine. And that's, that's what I always think about. I always just think, okay, it's about the. What you give and the time that you're with your kids. You know what I mean? Like, just try and give as much because who knows where life goes.

[A]

And that's so sweet.

[B]

25 is great. I wish I was starting to think about a kid's at 25. I wish I had kids at 25.

[A]

Do I go get knocked up tonight? Jesus. I can't make up my mind. Like young parents, so cool to me. But then like living life and then being a parent when you're older to me is like. Seems like the dream.

[B]

I know. I'm torn with it too. I guess if it's.

[A]

You did it. Perfect timing.

[B]

Yeah. I loved getting. Yeah, well, I wish it was earlier, but now I'm like, it was good. Cuz if I got pregnant at 26, I probably would have been like a mess. But you're together. You have it together. I was not together.

[A]

If I'm ready yet though, I'm still like. I think I'm still too selfish, you know?

[B]

Yeah, I feel you.

[A]

Just like I want to be fully ready. But we love you, Queen. And we're so excited. We're so Excited for you to call in with your babies.

[B]

Yeah. She'll be like, I have the babies. Now what do I do? I don't know, actually. Good luck.

[A]

Hope this helps.

[B]

Next question.

[C]

Hey, have y'all ever been with a man that, like.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

You were grossed out by his pheromones? Like, the way he smelled.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Like, especially in the morning, too.

[A]

Love you guys.

[B]

The giggle. So real.

[A]

So real. And, like, arguably unfixable.

[B]

Yeah. You can't be with someone you don't like their natural smell. Like, it's just, like.

[A]

That's, like, your body almost telling you, like, this person is not the one. And I have literally tried to fight that and, like, didn't work. Dump his stinky ass, girl.

[B]

Yeah. Dump him, period.

[A]

I mean, yeah, right? Like, because it's just, like, he can't.

[B]

Help it, but you can't help it, and it's just not gonna be.

[A]

I guess you could, like, hose him down, diva, but, like, no, because even.

[B]

If they take the cleanest shower, I've been with people like, like, let's shower together. And they still have something that's just, like, I, like, like, stenchy. And it's just, like, not even them smelling bad. It's just, like, a bad smell for you.

[A]

Yeah. Like, they smell like their house. And, like, you don't like that smell. Like, did you ever have that growing up? Like, people's houses? Like, just. I don't know. I probably had such a smelly house. My house smelled like cigarette and.

[B]

Oh, despair. Yeah.

[A]

Honestly, I don't know what to tell you. If he's really the one, I guess.

[B]

No, no, no. He's not the one. And she's calling me. Like, he stinks.

[A]

Yeah. That's so true. And, like, think about it. Like, actually calling to be like, what do I do? He's like, he stinks. Like, you're. Yeah, girl.

[B]

Dump him. Promise the next one will give a not a dump him advice. This is going to be like, we're gonna try and keep this one together. Whatever it is. We don't know what it is. It's. It's random, but we're gonna try and keep this relationship.

[A]

Yeah, this one's hard because it's like, even, like, when you're really, like, in love and physically attracted to someone, they can literally smell bad, but to you, it's good, you know?

[B]

Oh, for sure that I've been with people who are stinky. Everyone else was like, they're stink. They stink. And I'm like, I don't smell it. Like, I love them, you know, so it will be the opposite, too.

[A]

I want, like, my face in Makoa's armpit. It's so creepy.

[B]

Armpits smell good sometimes.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Moses armpit smell. Oh, I'm always, like, nuzzled up in there.

[A]

Yeah. That's so fair. Okay. Hopefully the next one, we're gonna.

[B]

We're gonna keep them together.

[A]

We're gonna keep them.

[B]

We're gonna do. He's a keeper. We're gonna give you a spicy one that he's. That Devin said maybe suitable for Patreon. But we'll give you a little. We'll give you some spice.

[A]

Yeah. We'll give you guys a little teaser of what happens over there after dark, because. Jesus.

[B]

We'll try and keep our answer. PGish 1313.

[C]

Hi, Trisha and Tana. I just want to say your podcast is the only way that I'm surviving a breakup. I've been really going through it, but.

[B]

I have a question.

[C]

I'm wondering, is it normal? Because this is something that my ex requested of me, for a man to ask you to bleach your private areas for him, and if you don't, then he takes it as a sign that you don't love him. Any advice is much appreciated. Thank you, girls.

[B]

This is the Patreon from hell. Everyone at these. Yeah. What the hell? Crash out these guys. Demanding the crazy. This is what we're talking about. Demanding the crazy. Craziest. What if you don't bleach your.

[A]

You don't love him. He doesn't love.

[B]

No. He's exactly. Psychotic sociopath.

[A]

It's so nice to me. Like, I'm not as angry, I think, as I normally am because she said she broke up with him. Like, at least she just, like, she did it. She led with it. I'm so proud of you. I think that is so crazy. It's like. And maybe it's because of Korn creating, like, this unrealistic standard, but it's like. Like, you should be able to be bushed up. Like, you know what I mean? Like, having just raw, like, natural, like, how you are.

[B]

I think there's, like, it's okay to. I think is like, if people saying their preference right? Like, and it can come across blunt. Like, for sure. Like, I. I've had people definitely be like, I prefer this. And you're just like. You're like, I'm gonna do what I want. Which is, like, totally fine. But, like, if someone's like, oh, I prefer this. That could be one thing or if you're like, hey, I love a pink or something and you're like, okay, maybe. But if you're like. Or you don't love me is like the crazy.

[A]

Yeah. It's these ultimatums. I'm actually just gonna come out right now and say, men don't deserve ultimatums. Like, only women should be able to give ultimatums. And gays from now on. Like, I'm. What do you mean? Like, that's. And it's. That's crazy. Like bleach. I just, I don't even.

[B]

And good ones on Amazon if you want.

[A]

Because it's like, like, what does that even mean? Like bleaching your butt.

[B]

The cream? Yeah, you get the cream. You never done it?

[A]

No, I've done that. But I'm just saying, like, she just said private parts. So then I was like, did he want like a bleach and tone for the. Like for the, for the pubes? Like, I have so many questions. Sometimes I wish I could call these people back.

[B]

I know. We really do need that interaction to be like, hey, we need a follow up question.

[A]

What needed to be bleached and toned? Like, I forgot the tone part. Like, I just. And it's like from a man. Like, men used to build now.

[B]

And also like you said, are the bleaching. Like, I didn't even think about that. Maybe it's the hair. The bleach. The hair. I thought it was like a bleach. Like the skin part to make it lighter. Like.

[A]

Yeah. And then even just that, it's like, hey, diva, look away. Close your eyes.

[B]

Yeah, get a pair of glasses. Why are you looking that close? Yeah. It's also asking someone to bleach their skin is like so crazy.

[A]

Okay, I'm not going to love you then if you don't paint your nuts purple every day. You know what I mean? Like, I. I'm not going to love you unless you put toupee on yourself.

[B]

Yeah, that's a good alternative. Be like, how about you bleach your balls?

[A]

Yeah. If your man is out here giving you an ultimatum, give him one back. That's worse.

[B]

Relationship and get out. There you go. Dump him soon.

[A]

She did though, shout out to you, diva, for taking that trash out. So we didn't have to tell you.

[B]

Thanks for the call. So we can. Like, we were trying to keep them together and I'm trying to think in a world where we kept them together, but I think the only solution would him just simply passing away.

[A]

Yeah. Or maybe even just closing his eyes for A long time.

[B]

Lights off. That's our solution to lots of things. There's, you know, the. Keeping the lights off is great.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I love anything you want down there.

[A]

I can't even believe that. Or you don't love me. Like, okay.

[B]

I'm like, who are these men that walk amongst us? Terrifying.

[A]

That's so horrifying. We're happy. You're out of it, diva. And your next one is gonna not care at all. Like, you could literally have your in a twist, and he's gonna be like, gorge.

[B]

I love in a twist. It's like a cone.

[A]

Like a little. Little pretzel situation. It sounds so good.

[B]

We get postmate pretzels. Where do you get pretzels from? I guess Annie Ann's not one close to us.

[A]

I know.

[B]

Love Wetzels pretzels. I like the little nubs.

[A]

Me too. So much. And like their flavors. They had a sour cream and onion flavor for a while. That was like my. Oh, my God. Sour cream, onion Pringles are like, me so good. I can eat a can of pringles in actually 25 seconds.

[B]

I feel like me and Malibu can take a whole can down together. And she loves sour cream and onion ones. I'm like, these are hot. You're not going to like them. And then she. I love them. She like, give me more. I was like, okay. Cherry sour cream on your chips with your daughter is kind of a.

[A]

That's goals right there. That's actually goals.

[B]

It's amazing. Next question.

[A]

Next caller. Okay, this is a common call that we started to get were the opposite of the age issue we were having with young girls going with older men. This is now an older woman going for a younger.

[B]

Older woman with a younger guy.

[A]

Why?

[B]

Well, this is on trend right now. I feel like this is very trendy.

[A]

I do see a lot. I'm on, like, cougar talk, too.

[B]

Yeah, it's really interesting. I don't know how I just feel. I hate older men with younger women, and I kind of don't love older women with younger men.

[A]

But I just never. I'm never going to understand. Like, I understand that the aesthetic reason is probably why both parties do that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But it's like, what the. Like, he's sitting there saying, Skibidi toilet Riz. And, like, you have a PhD. Like, it's like, what the actual.

[B]

Right. What are you talking about? Yeah, I just think old need to go with old. Your skin starts sagging. Go with someone else who skin starts second.

[A]

You know what I mean? Wisdom and like, I just.

[B]

Pop culture. There's just such a, like, gap.

[A]

And it's like there are hot older people to.

[B]

I just don't so many hot mari.

[A]

Like, I can't literally imagine right now, like, being with a 21 year old.

[B]

Which is crazy because you're only 26. So, like, even that, like, I agree with you. Like when, like, I never. First of all, I was never attracted to anyone in their early 20s, but even when I was like in my early 20s. But yeah, it is weird. They're like children. Like, you look at my, like 24.

[A]

Year old friends are like, this guy just played me and he's 21. I'm even still telling them, like, 21. Date someone who's 26. And you're not gonna get. Because of the, like, just difference in how much people grow.

[B]

Like the boys 18 to 25. Boys, like 18 to 30. For me, I just was like, never attracted. I'm just like, they all.

[A]

He's different. No, he's not.

[B]

He's a child. And men don't mature as quickly as women. So they say children till like 30.

[A]

I don't care how different he is. I don't care how philosophical he gets after he senew. Like, it's not it. It's not it.

[B]

The post cut 30. Yeah, that's where it's at. All right, let's hear it though. Let's hear mama. No, I hear that all of my TikTok like, you're doing great, Mama.

[A]

Yes, Mama.

[B]

Yes, Mama.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

All right, Good with the mama.

[C]

So I just recently celebrated my 30th birthday in Hawaii solo trip style. And while I was out there, I met a guy that he was 23 years old. We had a little fling while I was there. Literally paid for my birthday dinner. We love that. Like, literally has done more for me than any other guy I've been with the past four years. But now that I'm home and he lives in California, I'm like, do I keep this up? Is this age difference, like, that serious? Like, I don't know what to do because we're talking every day, talking on the phone, vibing. But to me, it's like the glaring, obvious difference in age that is hard to get past. Also, I don't care. So any advice? I'll take it.

[B]

Thanks.

[C]

Bye.

[A]

Love you real well.

[B]

I mean, eventually, I don't care. We're going girl. What?

[A]

Yeah, I guess, like, I mean, the context made it better for me, right? Like, at least he's not like 21 like 23, you know, and 30.

[B]

Yeah. That's not crazy. That's not crazy.

[A]

Yeah, it's, it's really not crazy. I mean it's. I think it's just one of those things where like see it out, right? If he's treating you great, see it out. Maybe it'll, you know. But then if he does some 23 year old California man.

[B]

Yeah. Don't be surprised.

[A]

Don't be. Yeah, you gotta. I would have such a, A guard up for such a long time. There are exceptions to rules.

[B]

Yeah. Do you think vacation. I never had one, so I don't know. But you think vacation flings can be long term?

[A]

Well, I mean that literally happened to me kind of. So I guess wasn't you think you.

[B]

Guys were just a vacation fling?

[A]

Originally he lived one island over theoretically, you know, but like I really did just think we were just gonna like. And then like, like I was like, oh, this is a hot guy. Like I want to him and like.

[B]

I'm here into like relationship.

[A]

We just kept hanging out and talking. Honestly, he ended up coming to LA to visit me. I think if he never came to visit me, it probably would have just fizzled out and been like, that was hot, you know.

[B]

And where is their location? California. And she didn't say he's in California.

[A]

He's in California. Hawaii. They met in Hawaii.

[B]

Okay, so he wasn't like a local there. I was like, maybe that's what he does with all the tourists. Yeah. Shows him a good time. But so yeah, the girl to meet up maybe then.

[A]

Yeah, I mean like I said, you know, if he acts like a 23 year old, like a spade is a spade, you know, but maybe he is different and this is your prince Charming and he's ready to settle down. Just think about you at 23. It's hard. Like those are the years where people oftentimes even think. Think they're ready to settle down.

[B]

She wants to settle down.

[A]

I don't know, she didn't say. But like it's just hard because the thoughts I feel like she's going to be having about her future.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Might not kick in for him. I actually just had like a. Two friends of mine were a couple and he was 23 and she was 28 and they dated for like three years and they just broke up for this exact reason where like he thought he was ready and then she was like, you know what I mean? Like yeah, no, for sure.

[B]

If you are wanting that, even if you think you might want that like, don't waste time because it's like so precious. Not saying 30 is old, but like, think about it. You want to meet someone. If you do want to get engaged and get married and take your time and then like all that stuff. Like, it does take a good 10 years to like build a life and get a home and stuff. So are you going to be 40 when you like start doing this? You know, maybe. And that's fine. And people do. But I think if you're like already thinking, like, it's just gonna take him that much longer to catch up with you, he's gonna be like seven years behind.

[A]

So the heart wants what the heart wants. Like, I. It's hard not to follow your heart. Like, if, if you really feel something here, maybe just have those conversations with him like a little earlier than you would with most people. Like, discuss the age gap and see if it's gonna work.

[B]

An issue. Do a mutual trip. I like that that he came to see you in LA and you're like, okay, this is what solidified it.

[A]

Yeah. And long distance is hard. Long distance with a 23 year old who lived in California, I would personally rather drive off a cliff. But listen, diva, we love and support you.

[B]

Yeah. Good luck. Call back, let us know. Yeah, honestly, please, we need to know. Follow up.

[A]

I'm nosy. Like, I'm locked in.

[B]

I would love for her to come out. Need to know what happens.

[A]

I know. I just love getting all the tea on everyone else.

[B]

They're married next week. Imagine we committed. Yeah.

[A]

Oh my God. I wonder if we're gonna have a not Loveline wedding.

[B]

That would be crazy. Like, your advice led me to my forever. We're open to it. Maybe Devin with Bachelor. Yes.

[A]

I can't wait. I actually can't wait for the same.

[C]

I think my boyfriend might be cheating on me with my sister because she has a boyfriend and he's been cheating on her. So she always goes to my boyfriend about her, like, situation. And there's been a couple nights that they went on drives together so she could talk to him. And I got in his car the other day and there was a used condom on the floorboard. And we had also had sex in the car a few weeks ago. So I'm not sure if it's mine or from her, but I'm scared to ask because I don't want to look insecure.

[B]

I mean, yeah, dump her too. Both of them.

[A]

I'm gonna crash this. I just watched this TikTok series of a girl. This was happening To. And she had kids with the guy, and she found out he was, like, hooking up with her sister, and now they're together, and she doesn't talk to any of them and, like, has kids with him. Shout out you. That series was literally incredible. You are everything. Girl. Girl.

[B]

But the show, you. I was like, okay, seriously, the plot.

[A]

Of the next season, Shout Out Joe, it's coming back.

[B]

I can't wait.

[A]

Me either. I love that show.

[B]

Why do we love that? Like, why does everyone love that? It's, like, so sick. And it's like, why are we. This guy that, like, stalks women.

[A]

Dexter is my favorite show of all time.

[B]

That's coming back, too. I saw. I never saw.

[A]

I'm watching the new one right now. I can't stop. It's like, it's my favorite show.

[B]

Really.

[A]

I love Dexterity.

[B]

What the psychology behind it is.

[A]

I know it's because they, like, make you love the, like, not lovable and, like, the toxic in me, I think.

[B]

Oh, the Joe Goldberg. I'm like, I wish someone was that obsessed with me. They're. Those girls are so lucky goals. I was like, damn. Why are they all trying to, like, unalive him? He loves you so much.

[A]

Just get in the glass box, girl. Yeah.

[B]

I would be the one that he. He fell out of love with. And then she started, like, stalking hands. That'd be me. It's like, actually, no, you're not leaving Real as. Honestly, what happened?

[A]

Oh, my God, girl.

[B]

Oh, right. Oh, this is what. Yeah, the sister. Yeah, they're all, like, them all, like, all of them that's actually wild. And they have, like, the worst, like, weird karma because it's all, like. It's such, like, you can't help who you love and who you fall in love with. Yes, you can.

[A]

If you actually really can't.

[B]

Husband, like, yeah, I don't care. Don't let you. Don't let yourself fall in love. People do that, too, with, like, when they're falling with their students. You just can't help. We felt like, yeah, you don't fall in love with a child. Like, what? Like, that's crazy.

[A]

There are absolutely parameters. And it's like. I just always want to say the intuition is so real. Like, like, our insecurities and, like, crazy people will make you feel like your intuition isn't real. And, like, most of the time, it is. Okay.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, the condom in the car is nuts.

[B]

You didn't know if it was hers. Yeah, but, like, you wouldn't even be.

[A]

Saying this if like you knew it was yours, you know what I mean? And like it sounds like she's trying to like second guess herself out of it. Also just the solo car ride rides. Like Mako is not going on a solo car ride with Isabella. You know what I mean? Like, like they both love me and respect me enough to like even. And they are. You know what I mean? Like, it's just.

[B]

Yeah. And if you suspect it already, if you're like kind of suspecting it, it's.

[A]

Like solo car rides to talk. Go yourselves.

[B]

Yeah, that is. That is a little odd for sure.

[A]

Oh my. I'm no girl. Cause hell. And like I don't want to seem insecure. Like, okay, like at the off chance that this isn't happening, then you'd be like, yo, my bad. But like that's not even seeming insecure. That seeming like a stands on business and isn't going to be mistreated.

[B]

Gaslight her though. They're gonna be like, you're crazy. You're crazy. And that always happens. And then guess what? The person ends up like not being crazy and you're like, yeah, out of me. So. Oh, it's tough because like, what if like she is just like. But hey, I think anyways, having a talk and be like, I'm a little uncomfortable with like you spending alone time with my sister. I think is also like very valid.

[A]

Like, yeah, I agree.

[B]

I don't know. Yeah, I wouldn't be with like, like, even though it's like what? I don't know. Because you know, there's an argument where it's like, you know, you should have that relationship with other people. It's like, fine. But I don't think there's nothing you don't necessarily need to have private talks.

[A]

With your solo car ride. Private talk, Drive off a cliff. I can't stop. Yeah, like I just.

[B]

Yeah, I would definitely just say like I'm not comfortable with YouTube being alone. And if they like get suss about it, like you're the weird one. It's like, no. Then something's happening.

[A]

And unfortunately, as women sometimes we have have to do some digging. Cuz Trisha's so right. Like if they were, they would just gaslight her. So it's like, put your sleuth hat on. Okay.

[B]

It sucks too because people will like deny, deny, deny. And then like 10 years later, like they found out the truth. They're like, oh yeah, that was happening. It's like, yeah.

[A]

And it's like, you just. I just don't even Want this for you. And I don't think you're crazy. Especially with the solo car. Right? It's like. It's like it's not just an idea. You have reasoning behind your idea.

[B]

And in a wishing go. Go so far. Like when you like kind of think something's wrong, it like kind of is. Even if it's not that, it might be something like similar. And you just need to like.

[A]

Yeah, condom too. Is just like, I don't like it. I don't like it.

[B]

And you don't like the condom.

[A]

I'm so sorry.

[B]

I guess it's good he's using condoms. I guess that's the best.

[A]

Like. Yeah, I mean, listen, there's. With lemons, you know, make lemonade, like.

[B]

A condom brand Lemonade. Condoms. Oh, flavored lemonade. Oh. But then you're like, is it lemonade or is it pee?

[A]

That's so true.

[B]

Actually, it's lemonade, babe. It's like, is it that?

[A]

Yeah, that's horrible. And we've had so many pee questions.

[B]

That it's like, yeah, that's all I'm thinking about right now.

[A]

I know our Patreon.

[B]

Your bladder is okay. You haven't gone in a while. I'm worried about you because I know.

[A]

I'm probably gonna have to go soon.

[B]

Yeah, go whenever you need to go.

[A]

No, I always hold my pee. And Trisha, you're such a real friend.

[B]

You need to go. There's a Coco Melon song that plays. It's like, go before you go. Don't wait till it's too late.

[A]

I was literally joking earlier that like Malibu Elvis and me, like, I will literally look at Trisha like a five year old sometimes and just like sick, crazy behavior. Like that's so. You're singing Coco Melon to me to get me to. So like that's so real.

[B]

Letting you know you can go. It's okay.

[A]

No, one more question.

[B]

One more question.

[A]

It gets me fired up, you know?

[B]

Cuz then it's like, yeah, yeah. You look so smart. You look at Carly Quinn or something right now. Ooh, I never seen any.

[A]

I've never seen either.

[B]

Like, we love her. I know. She's like a psychiatrist, right? That like looks at the joker.

[A]

No.

[B]

Yeah, I think. Does Lady Gaga play Harley Quinn or am I. Is that making that up?

[A]

There's another niche community.

[B]

No, everyone hated it, but I have like a feel. Feeling I'd like it. Like, it's. It's kind of. Kind of a musical. So maybe you wouldn't like It. But I guess it's a musical love.

[A]

Of Lady Gaga, though. Oh, you do?

[B]

So you probably would like it. But even Lady Gaga fans were like, it's bad. But really, I think it looks good. I don't know. I kind of like it.

[A]

I want to watch that too. I'm a little monster. I love her.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I really do. I just love it.

[B]

I actually, like. I know. I know a Lady Gaga song, but, like, not one comes to the top of my head. Like, I can't even think of one song right now.

[A]

I'm on the right track, baby. I was born this way. Oh, my God, Tana. Never get back into music.

[B]

I don't know it.

[A]

And that's, like, you would know it if I had rhythm. Paparazzi. I'm your biggest fan of. That's a good song. Bad romance. Okay. Wow.

[B]

These are so, like. This is an era of life where I was, like, literally, like, in the gutter, like, every night. This is why, like, I'm guessing.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

I'm gonna guess 2009 to, like, 2012 is Lady Gaga. Because this is, like, Twilight, where I'm like, where was I? Like, I didn't even know those movies came out. Like, I was, like, literally out of my mind. So I think that era. Justin Bieber don't remember when he came out.

[A]

Oh, my God. Justin Bieber. I'm the biggest believer. That's my number one stand.

[B]

You dated Justin Bieber look alike, didn't you?

[A]

Literally. Because that's so funny. I was talking to Paige about that in the car today because she loves Timothy Chalamet, and she was like, if I watch this Timothy movie tonight, I'm just gonna get sad that I can't have him. And I told her that's how I feel about Justin Bieber, and that's literally why I had to date that guy.

[B]

Look alike. Well, there was a Timothy Chalamet lookalike competition, so maybe she could go date one of them.

[A]

I'm saying because it does scratch the itch a little. Like, there were times where we'd be hooking up and I'd be like.

[B]

Like, you just think it's Justin Bieber.

[A]

As long as you love me. What would he sing it?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

No, I think I would have, like, gotten the ick too hard to be dating him if he, like, tried to act like Justin Bieber, you know, that's how I felt.

[B]

We were talking about Austin Butler as Elvis is kind of how I felt with him, but it was more not like a Sexual thing. It was more like, God, I wish that was, like, my son.

[A]

It was really weird.

[B]

I was like, I wish I knew this person. Like, I want him on my podcast as Elvis. Like, I be so every.

[A]

I would be in the corner, I would break into your house. You could literally say no, and I would be here.

[B]

When I was pregnant with Malibu, when the Elvis movie came out, and, like, we didn't know the gender yet, I really thought it was like, we're having a boy. This is a sign. It's gonna be Elvis. So, like, in my head, she was always gonna be Elvis. And then I was like. And then she came, and it was obviously was a girl. And I loved Malibu Barbie. That was always, like, my name for the girl. So I was like, okay, we're gonna have a girl now. We'll have a boy next, or whatever. And so when we got pregnant second time, we're like, this is the final baby. I'm like, no matter what, boy or girl, it's Elvis. And that's so crazy. We have the Boston Butler poster up there. It's like, because. Because was. I loved Elvis way before, of course, but, like, I did love Austin Butler's Elvis so much.

[A]

So much. I thought it was such a good movie. I love Elvis everything, though. It's just like Vegas. Like, it's like, oh, right. I love it so much.

[B]

Oh. Every time I'd go, I think it was like, the Hilton. They had, like, a big Elvis bronze statue in there by the Bennett. And I was like, I love it.

[A]

And all the places on the strip that say, like, Elvis stayed here. Like, it's getting me, like, I'm going.

[B]

And, like, getting married by Elvis in Vegas.

[A]

I can't. It's so good.

[B]

Yeah. So Austin Butler, if you're out there and you want to be on Not Loveline will have you here. He broke up with Kaia Gerber. Maybe Paige can date him. Does she and him?

[A]

People think he's dating Kendall Jenner too, now. Wow.

[B]

Good guys. Like, Bad Bunny. And now she's dating. Like, that's crazy. Bad Bunny show sold out in Puerto rico in, like, 24 hours. He has a residency there for, like, the whole summer. And I was like, I kind of want to go see him, because I'm kind of in a Bad Bunny phase right now.

[A]

Love.

[B]

Oh, my God. Because we talked about him, and I was like, oh, I wish he would dress in Dragon. And then someone's like, he did. And then I saw him in Dragon. I was like, he's everything to me. And so I did the lore, I did the deep dive and I was like, oh, he dated Kendall Jenner. Which is like so random, but good for her. And then now she's saying Austin Butler. I was like, damn, girl.

[A]

Yeah. That's crazy. She is like. And she's pretty private. Like you don't know much about her relationship.

[B]

Yeah. Compared to that about her. Like, that's kind of cool. And then Timothy Chaumet with Kylie, so.

[A]

Which I love.

[B]

Yeah, they're pretty private. They're pretty.

[A]

I just like, people hate on that. So. God, this is a hot take. That's gonna get me like actually into hot water. But like, like people just always speak about Kylie so mean with Timothy. Like, what do they talk about? Like, as if she literally has no brain. Like in her head. Like lobotomized.

[B]

And it's not a human.

[A]

Yeah. And it's like they probably have a lot to talk about. And like she's a baddy, you know? He's the ultimate baddie.

[B]

It is wild. He's one of the ultimate bad theater kid. Did you ever see Wonka?

[A]

Loved.

[B]

You did?

[A]

Yes, Loved.

[B]

That's amazing. Wild. Yeah. And he gave me the E. The first time I saw it. I was like, oh, that gives me the egg. But then afterwards it's kind like. Okay, that's kind of endearing. But I'm like shocked someone like that would be with Kylie and vice versa because, like, it is so niche. He's so like theory. And that's like. She's so cool. She. Who was her. Who was the guy who she had kids with.

[A]

I forgot Travis Scott.

[B]

And he's the opposite in the sense that he's just so like swag and like the opposite. Like in my opinion. I don't know. I guess people like him, but he seems just like nerdy and whatever.

[A]

I love him so much. But I also love that I love the like baddie girl with the nerdy guy.

[B]

Like, yeah.

[A]

Trope so much. Or even just like the theater kid. Like the alternative. I also like, I respect when a girl goes completely opposite from her ex, like with the next one. Cuz it's like maybe you just wanted something completely different than what you had actually.

[B]

So. You know, Moses is like the first, like he was, I always say, like old saggy Caucasian men. And I was just like, it was so nice to have like a change of pace because my memozy had like long hair and he was kind of like hippie ish. And he was very hippie dippy. He was very just Like Burning man. And it's like so the opposite of anyone I would date. And so I was. And obviously it worked out for me. Who was it too that God. They just dated someone so opposite. We were just talking about Kylie said my head but sometimes. Yeah, that's the way you need to go out of your country. You know Benny and Selena. And Selena is.

[A]

Oh, I'm like a Benny Blanco die hard. Like I get so mad when I see the comments coming at him same. He's everything.

[B]

Yeah, he's like so talented. He's written like huge songs like Justin Bieber. Like he' like he is the music.

[A]

Industry and she is music. And like there's. He's so nice to her. The way he talks about her proposed hero Taco Bell in the comments saying I would never date a man like this. Are the who are literally gonna die alone happy. Open your wheelhouse and be less of a judgmental damn.

[B]

I am like imagine that God is here.

[A]

But he was the sister. See, I just.

[B]

That's like Chloe too. I always feel like she needs to date someone that's like out of her normal, normal type of guy, you know, because she loves an NBA player as we all do. But I just think they're a little bit playboy because they get everybody and.

[A]

Just traveling the world like that's so scary.

[B]

Like temptation everywhere.

[A]

Being in these different cities with women throwing themselves at them is crazy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I like will forever parasocially want Chloe and Lamar to work out, but it's.

[B]

Coming back this season. Did you see the Tr.

[A]

Like they. They know their audience because I was on the edge of my seat. I like, I just love them them. I really do. And it's because I. I know it was so. Yeah, well, I think hard for her.

[B]

Is he sober? I mean, he was. He was sick. Right. He was an addict.

[A]

So like in my dream world, like he is fully healed and they like make it out on the other side.

[B]

You know What I didn't know is they like got engaged like nine days after and they got married like two weeks later. Like nine days.

[A]

Oh, that's crazy.

[B]

Yeah, they're like, you knew him nine days.

[A]

And everyone gave Kim so much for the 72 day marriage.

[B]

I know. Well, I think they stay married longer. Yeah, I think they. They got engaged after nine days and then married after two weeks.

[A]

But then they were married for some years.

[B]

I think they were married for some years. Yeah, I think she really loved being married and like wanted to stick it out, but I mean he just had such A problem, like with substances and stuff.

[A]

And he said like a lot of crazy stuff in his book. Right? About like. I think I haven't read it. I just like saw Tick tocks.

[B]

I don't know, I. I think maybe starting fresh, going back with an ex. Sometimes I'm like, no, girl, don't do.

[A]

Yeah, that's always true too. Because that's just so like 50. 50.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's not a full fresh chance, you know?

[B]

Might work for some, but. Dump the sister and the boyfriend. Dump. Yeah.

[A]

I'm so sorry, girl. Come over. We want to hang out, have a mukbang with us.

[B]

Maybe it's fine. We can share, I guess.

[A]

Yeah, that's the thing too. I know these girls are calling in half. These men probably are gremlins. And the girls are so hot.

[B]

Always there was someone on Tik Tok, like a random person that's like not an influencer. And she was talking about that how she didn't really want a baby. Her husband kind of like pressured, like, I really want this baby or whatever. So she kept the baby because she was gonna like not keep it. He's like, I'm gonna be there for you, whatever. And like was cheating on her. Oh, that was the gaslighter. He was like cheating. He was going to Mexico like five times a week to work or something. And she's like, you know, she wasn't working and so. And he would go and basically like. Yeah, he would come home and didn't want to have sex with her because she was pregnant or whatever. And then she had the baby and yeah, like, so she was having sex like a year with her husband because he had like a 22 year old living with him down in Mexico. And they were like having sex. And she found out because she went on his phone and recently deleted and it was like videos of them having sex. And he was like gaslighting her this whole time. Yeah, it was. And anyways, the more of that story. She's like a cute. She was such a cute girl. Like young, like looks like a Hooters girl. Like just so cute. And everyone wants to find the husband. They scrolled because she had like old tiktoks with him. I mean, troll. Just like troll.

[A]

And you can't be bold, both. You either look like that you're amazing or you're so hot and awful.

[B]

Oh, it usually is, right? Unless you're a celebrity and then usually attractive or whatever. But it's the. The normies out there. They're always like disgusting, cheating on these.

[A]

Always these beautiful women, too.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Do you ever finish filming not love Lane. And you go home. Well, you are homestairs.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You go upstairs to your healthy relationship.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And like, you're just kind of like, man.

[B]

Yeah, right. You're like, you disgust me. Get away from me.

[A]

No, literally, like, I'll come home to McConees. Like how I was filming. I'm like, good, good. I want dinner.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Didn't do anything wrong.

[B]

Sometimes. Yeah. Like, just sometimes when I think about men just being awful, like, sometimes I do give a little.

[A]

Poor thing. He didn't do anything. But it's just like, Jesus Christ.

[B]

You have a between your legs. Get away from me.

[A]

No, it's. It's just like, literally, I want to say, like 70% of our calls are so disappointing when it comes to the male race. And we're always hopeful. Listen, we have a he's the one button. It just doesn't get pressed very often.

[B]

I know we need to hear calls from people who have like a healthy relationship, but just needs some other advice from it. You know something. I don't know what it is.

[A]

I'm starting to know, like, what it is.

[B]

I don't know. I would call in and be like, oh, God, I really am just stuck as a parent compared to my husband. He's just perfect. He takes care of them, he gets up with them. Like, how do I become a better parent? Like, that's what I want to call in for, cuz I don't know.

[A]

No, literally, I would just call in and be like, I'm a help less.

[B]

Therapist when he comes on.

[A]

Oh my God, Seriously, I don't know.

[B]

Next question.

[A]

Next caller. Please give us hope.

[C]

Hey, Trisha. Hey, Tana. This is Katie. I'm just calling because I want to know, do you guys personally have like an ick? And if you have an ick, does Moses or Makoa do either of them? I'm personally single, Rip. But my friends always tell me, like, I am way too judgy and I get to ache way too quick. My biggest ick is if a man wears flip flops. Like, what are you doing? Why are you wearing flip flops? Like, you have no reason to have a song in between your big toe. Like, I just don't understand. It just gives me the biggest ache. I don't know. I don't know. But what is your biggest fix?

[B]

Oh, my God. Girls with their ex. Look, I'm a judgmental when it comes to this, but at the same time, I had crazy aches With Moses. But it is crazy. I saw, like, on Tick Tock, someone's like, when a guy drinks a Frappuccino, I was like, oh, my God. It's like, let him enjoy his Frappuccino. Like, that's crazy. And I would judge people, too. Like this. I'm like, that's crazy, girl. Let him wear his thumbs. But I did judge Moses for his Tick Tocks. When I first met him, I hated him. He would show them to me, and I was like, stop that. Like, it would make. It would give me a nick. I was, like, ill. I'm, like, not attracted to you right now. Like, it was so weird. But the flip side, that we were talking about Moses's canned fish reviews, and I love them so much now, I'm, like, so obsessed. When Tick Tock was gonna go away, I was most sad because I'm like, he never tells me when he's filming them. I never know when he's doing them or what he's doing. So when I see it, it's just like, this little, like, surprise that I don't know about him. And it makes me so happy. So the. It can turn into, like, love, you know, Because I think if Moses were to have shown me those when we first started dating, I'd been like, oh, gross. Get away from me. And now I'm just like, this is the cutest thing I've ever seen.

[A]

That is. I. First of all, I literally almost cried over Moses fish talks earlier. Like, I'm not even kidding. Like, Tick Tock. Going away. He loves them. Go on. Yeah. But I think that as girls, and rightfully so, we might have started using that as, like, a defense mechanism. Like, to me, it's. It sounds like you. And maybe I'm going out on a limb here, and I'm completely wrong. And it's just, like, lighthearted. But, like, are creating these icks to, like, stop yourself from getting hurt. Men suck.

[B]

I get that.

[A]

And, like, not fully opening up and, like. You know what I mean? Because same thing. Yeah. With Makoa, like, now all of the things that I would have normally found icks in a place of my life, I find them to be so endearing because I've just let myself fully fall, but it's so hard to get there.

[B]

Ick that you would think for anyone else but Mako, you're like, I love it.

[A]

McCall plays video games.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

So that, like, would normally I would be like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Like, smash the controller. Like, literally, you. And, like, with him, I'm like, you love it and you talk to your friends and your little headphone and it's like the same thing as, like, me in the group chat, Kikiing with all my girls over at TikTok. But it's how you guys do it, you know?

[B]

I see that football.

[A]

Like, that's crazy. Yeah.

[B]

To be with someone who likes sports. Are you watching the big game?

[A]

That's still me. I don't know.

[B]

Like, there's a big one coming.

[A]

Is there like, the Super Bowl?

[B]

Yeah. What is that? Are you going to it? I feel like you're a Super Bowl. You know, influencers always go to Super Bowl. I feel like that'd be you. You're like, let's go, baby.

[A]

The only time I've ever been offered to go was with, like, sugar daddies. So then just like, I didn't. I wasn't one of those girls. When you see these Insta models at the super bowl, they're with their daddies.

[B]

But do you remember the guy, the hot ones guy was with his corn star girlfriend at the Super Bowl? Was it the Super April? And, like, there was pictures taken of them. And then he dumped her, like, the next day because it got out that she was, like, a corn star, that he was dating her.

[A]

I was like, hey, hey, hey. Hate, hate. Hope he gets the hottest hot sauce ever. That's so. Yeah, I remember that. That was, like, really bad.

[B]

Hot ones. I feel like you would have, like, you know, back in the day, he did, like, a ton of influencers.

[A]

I did my own boof parody and kept it pushing.

[B]

Didn't you?

[A]

Yes, yes, yes.

[B]

Shout out. I love it. They just set up a set for you. They're like, here's our hot one set for you.

[A]

Yes. And then I was, like, literally damn near puking in their headquarters.

[B]

So did they set up all the sauces for you?

[A]

No, we ordered them. But there it was, like, the most disgusting thing I've ever done. Like, truly, these celebrities are so composed for, like, what it is. It was like I was, like, snotting galore. Disgusting.

[B]

No. People, like, took it down. I think it was a Kiki Palmer who just, like, had no issue at all.

[A]

And I was.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, that's crazy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What was what? Oh, icks. Yeah. I mean, like, again, all the things that I normally would be, like, icked out. Like, I think you just have to try to let yourself fall and not let the control you. I have, like, we all have, like. Like, I hate skinny jeans on a guy. You know what I Mean, really? Like, yeah, what is skinny jeans?

[B]

I'm trying to think of most words.

[A]

Like if I fitted. When I see like grown ass, big ass men with their like, ankles out, like thick.

[B]

Or just adult men.

[A]

Like, just adult men. Just grown men. And it's like so tight.

[B]

Really.

[A]

I don't mind if it's like a rocker, like, you know, like, can do that. Yeah. Like they, they. This side of the world can have skinny jeans, but the rest, like, oh, my emos. I remember that was like the first thing I ever told Harry Jowsey. I was like, yes, we can keep making tick tocks, but you've got to get thicker wearing the skinny jeans. So skinny. But then he got a stylist, so I'm not talking, you know, podcast. I don't know.

[B]

I'm pretty. He's on the Alex Cooper one, which is crazy because it's like a female podcast network. And then they had Harry Jazzy, who was like the anti female. Like, he just hates women. I was like, that's crazy.

[A]

So crazy. I don't watch. I do watch some male podcasts. I watch like the Ova Vaughn.

[B]

He's single.

[A]

He is single, I think.

[B]

But like, how does it not to like, judge, not that everyone needs to be in a relationship, but like, he seems to want one because I see clips of it. So why do you think he isn't in one? Because he seems like, want one.

[A]

I feel like I'm imagining being the ovon. It's probably hard to find someone who matches your energy.

[B]

Yeah, like, who would his. Yeah, like who would he date? Yeah, I bet he's just like a boy, though. Like, even though he seems so nice and genuine, like Southern and everything like that, I still, A lot of the.

[A]

Comedians are, you know, and I, I.

[B]

Used to, I used to be obsessed with stand up comedians. Like when I was really young, like 18. And I was upset. Oh my God, me too. I love them. And I was obsessed with this one. I always tell the story and I better not even say it because he just DM'd me. Like, like literally, like last month. And we went on one date. I told the story on podcast, but I won't say his name because, like, bless his heart.

[A]

But wait, I want to know. We can believe it. Tell me you want.

[B]

I don't even think you'll know who this is because he was like 50 when I was like 18. No, I'm. Exactly. Maybe he was like, maybe he was 50. He. He's like 64 now, so maybe he was 50.

[A]

Is this the me and the truck guy?

[B]

No, that guy I worked with. But I love that you know that story. No, this is. We'll beep it up. I don't think he knows him. And I was obsessed because he was in all these movies as a kid. He was like, whatever, obviously bleep the names of the movies or whatever. But I was like, 18 and I was on the Conan O'Brien show and he was one of the stand up comics. And I was, like, so obsessed because he's like, in movies and stuff. And I was, like, so obsessed with him. And he asked me to go to Barney's Beanery. So weird. This is like 2006 before. It was cool. So when, like, Tariq, like, I love Barney's beauty. I was like, what? But he took me. Took me to the one in Burbank or invited me out to dinner. Yeah. And I was like, that's such a.

[A]

Funny place for, like, a date.

[B]

Yeah. Well, the comedy club Flappers was next door, the Burbank one. I think he was probably there, but he brought his friend with him. And I was, like, mortified because, like, I guess he was trying to set me up with his friend and told the story on, like, the Adam Carolla podcast. And then he. And then he went on. Adam Coroll and Adam Cruel asked him about it, and he's like. He basically said, like, I wasn't as hyped because I was, like, fat, by the way. I was 18 and I was like 160. I wasn't even like, whatever, but. And so I'd always tell the story because I just thought, like, what? But basically he like, hooked me up with like a. He wanted me to hook up with his friend or whatever. But they had just seen a blog or a video. They looked me up on the Internet, like, while I was there, like, they, like, Googled me.

[A]

Awful.

[B]

Yeah. And I had a video call, like, why I'm celibate. And I think it was obviously like a troll video or something. And they, like, immediately ended it, like, actually, we gotta go. We'll, like, pay for your. You know, actually, I think I paid for my drinks. I think the main comedian guy that I thought I was on a date with, I. I think he, like, offered to pay for my parking, but I think I paid for everyone's drinks. And I was like, I must have been 21. I'm trying to think maybe not. Maybe I was 20, but I get that.

[A]

Like, just wanting out of that situation so bad you don't care if you overdraft your account. You're like, I will swipe. I'm out.

[B]

No, they wanted out of it. They're like, we have to go. And I was like, oh. And they were, like, getting up to leave, and they went to the bathroom or something. And so I paid the bill, and I had, like, no money at this time. Like, I'm literally like, 20 or 21 maybe. And. And then, like, I think the friend or whatever, like. Like, yeah, I. I don't know what it was. It was like something. Something weird. I think I ended up paying. I can't remember it fully, but I do think I ended up paying.

[A]

It's all trash.

[B]

And they were like, oh, wow, thank you. Like, that's crazy. Like, we actually made money on this or something. Like, weird. I remember. And then I think the comedian guy, like, walked me to my car maybe, or at least to the parking garage, and then offered to pay for parking. I was like, no, it's fine. But. But anyways, he, like. The follow up to this is he sent me a DM right after I did snl. I don't know if that's a coincidence or what, but it was like, because he has a podcast. He's had a podcast for literally. Literally 20 years. I'm telling you this, he was probably the first podcaster. He's, like, had a podcast for so long. And he literally said, obviously this was a joke. I wasn't, like, taking it, like, literal, but he's like, hey, when's ready for our second date? Or something like that. And I was like. And he's like. He's, like, 65 and, like, really old now. And, like, again, obviously, it's like, you.

[A]

Shouldn'T be sliding into anyone's DMs at 65.

[B]

Like, Slide says, like, married, kids. Like, I'm sure he knew, but it was just such a weird, weird thing because he's a podcast. So it was probably something, but I almost gagged because, you know, there's like, those trauma. That was for some reason. And when I tell a story, it may not sound as traumatic as it was in my head, but I was so embarrassed. And then.

[A]

No, that is, like, traumatizing, right?

[B]

So that I was on a date with him and he had his friend, and then they saw I was celibate.

[A]

Or they thought I was leaving.

[B]

Like, them leaving instantly, as soon as they say, oh, you should celebrate. Bye. And then going on Adam Carolla being like, well, you know, she's like, a certain size of a certain girl. Like, that's not like, like just kind of like being like, she's fat and my friend likes fat girls or something. The point about this, how we got to this. Sorry, that was such a long winded story. It's like, comedians are the play. Like, Theo's handsome. We get. We're getting full circle here. This guy. I'm not even trying to be mean at all.

[A]

Well, I also think that.

[B]

Let me show you this photo because when I tell you, like, and I'm not even being mean because I, like, whatever, but he's troll.

[A]

Oh, my God. And he has that. It's men like this that really will have something to say about a woman's looks. And it's like, you're lucky to get a woman.

[B]

And he was. How old is he now? Just so I know our age ranges, because I was probably 20, if I'm being realistic. Like, I was probably 20 at the time.

[A]

Oh, my God. He looks like he just smelled a fart. His, like, permanent face is like, right.

[B]

He's nerdy and he's funny and he's. He was famous. And I was like, that's cool. And I was like, you know, I was so excited. I love, like, famous guys, but 62. I'm 36. What is that age difference? God, I'm so bad at math.

[A]

26 years, is it?

[B]

That sounds right.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I was 20. I'll say 21 for a sake of argument if we were drinking, but I was definitely not older than 21 because I was on Conan in, like, 2008. So. So, yeah, so he was 46 and I was 20, and I was pretty cute back then and whatever. And I'm like, the audacity. And then when he went on that I'm Crawler show, like, in 2020, any.

[A]

Woman'S looks, especially that long after. Because in 2020, that's when he went and said something about how you look.

[B]

You know, he never acknowledges I told the story so much. He's like, I don't know this girl. She's, like, random. So then when Anar had, like, you know, and he was. He was good. He had my back. He's like, you have to understand, though. Oh, my God. Sorry. Is everything okay?

[A]

That scared the out of me. Like, the comedians are putting out a hit on us.

[B]

I don't think this guy has that power.

[A]

Adam Corolla with, like, I'm dead.

[B]

But he had my back. He's like, no, you have to understand, like, obviously you're the big superstar comedian. Like, he's famous and stuff. Like, obviously, Obviously you would know why she would think you're going on a date with her because you asked her out. She doesn't know this friend. You just bring a friend with you. Like, you have to understand the, like, miscommunication because he acted like, I don't know what I did. Like, it wasn't my date. And I was like, but you asked me out at Conan. You asked me this. Your friend was never involved in any of this. And all of a sudden you bring him with it. Like, it was so.

[A]

I think all male comedians, me just saying male, like, but like, comedy does take a level of narcissism. Like, I think I'm funny and I think that what. What I'm saying should be heard. Right.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then especially with these men, like, they take that run with it so hard.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, and then you. You hear all the abuse of power, like, cases like that too, because it's just like the whole world's telling you, you're so funny and awesome and hot and like, whatever, you know, I. Yeah.

[B]

I had a string of stand up comedians, like, and they were all boys. They were all like. It was like, nice, but they were all like, not really. They kind of just like played with you and toyed with you or whatever like that. And I was like, and these are comedians which are funny, but, like.

[A]

And you think they're gonna be a nice guy because they're funny. I feel like. Right.

[B]

And I would think that about the ovon. You think he's just like, so nice and maybe is. Maybe I'm getting this, like, so wrong. I do not know him, but he gives me that energy where everyone's like, he's just so sweet and goofy and like, whatever. And it's like. But actually just like playing all these women.

[A]

He gets like, like lots of like, like really hot girls, you know?

[B]

Oh, you seem people he's like, dated.

[A]

Yeah. And like, they're hot.

[B]

They're hot as who, like, gives that up? I don't, like, blame him. You know, they're probably like, I'm just gonna stay this way forever because he has to be in his 40s movies.

[A]

Yeah. It's kind of. It's all just nuts. Hannah Burner, like, really put me on to that thought, like, when she was just like, all male comedians are, like, grimy. They play. They play games and stuff. Even Brooke with, like, Matt Rife, like, just. I know that's a more like New age one, but like, still, like, I.

[B]

Just think, not anymore. He looks a little crazy, but he Was like attracted at the time. So I kind of get it. I was like, okay, you're like like Dane Cook back in the day was only like a hot guy. Although he that situation turn out weird. His like I think his wife he met when like allegedly they started dating 18. But like knew her when she was like 17. And now they're like. And he was like 50.

[A]

Anyways, it's like it never ends.

[B]

Yeah. So it's. Yeah, I would say just don't date stand up comedians and we got here. How did I try to tie it back into the question?

[A]

I have no idea. I don't even know, honestly. But I was living for it.

[B]

My therapy right there. Let me just tell the story once again. Because he DM me again and I haven't seen him.

[A]

Ick.

[B]

There you go. And I haven't seen him literally Since. In like 16 years. And I was like, that's crazy. Like when you just hear from someone from so long ago, it's crazy because.

[A]

That'S how you know you're such a like memorable icon. Like 16 years later, this man is literally like struggling to type, sliding in your DMs. No, but it's Trisha, first of all. I will literally listen to any. I just love your lore, your lawn so deep. So it's like never got married.

[B]

It's not to say like again, that's not everyone's end all be all. But you know, it is like.

[A]

But it's telling, you know.

[B]

Yeah. You don't have one ex wife. You know what I mean?

[A]

Like yeah, it's. That's crazy. Some men do just want to do that. I guess it's better to like be like, listen, I'm gonna until I drop.

[B]

Maybe he's not straight either, you know, like I don't know the whole background. Like you know, he's older and like whatever. I don't know. And like not saying just cuz you don't want to be with me. He's not straight. Like I always get straight vibes from him.

[A]

But yeah, you never know. You just never know.

[B]

Let's always chalk it up. If a guy doesn't want you, he's gay. Yeah, you must be gay. Doesn't want me.

[A]

Honestly? Yes, like absolutely, yes. Every time. Yeah, I'm dying on that hill.

[B]

I think that about everyone. When I was younger I was like, must be gay.

[A]

No, that should just be our advice. Like, oh, he's your sister. Like he's gay. Sorry, that.

[B]

That makes sense.

[A]

He doesn't. Because you do see that, like, I see that a lot in la, actually. Like, a lot of these guys who.

[B]

Are like, no, he said next.

[A]

No, no, you're so fine. I was gonna say that a lot of the famous players end up being closeted, but that's not my tea to clock, so.

[B]

Yeah, that is so true. And then I have empathy for him if that's the case. You know what I mean? I just, like, literally exposed him and like, sorry, you might be gay.

[A]

No, it makes more sense at least why these guys are like, just.

[B]

Yeah, but don't play with girls hearts just because you're gay.

[A]

Yeah, that's true.

[B]

That's your own. No, that's your own closet to come out of.

[A]

Especially in la. It's like, we welcome you here.

[B]

We welcome.

[A]

You know, it's crazy that after SNL he slid in your dms after all that time.

[B]

A lot of people did. It's actually not like, even, like, sign with DMs to date me, but just a lot of people that I, like, had known from, like, the past and stuff like that was just like.

[A]

It must be such a validating feeling. It's like, oh, now you want to talk to me?

[B]

Isn't that crazy? That, like, little, like, I'm the very last skit. I'm in there for, like, two seconds and they're like, oh, my God, don't downplay it. You ain't no I live. That'll be my, like, next thing that I hang on to for the next 15 years, like, the Eminem video. I'm gonna be like, next 15 years. You know what I mean? But it is funny how many people, like, did DM afterwards. Like, okay, that's cool.

[A]

Yeah, that's funny.

[B]

Thank God Tik Tok's back because now we can see SNL clips. I would never watch SNL if there was, like, any other way. You know what I mean? I just love TikTok for that reason.

[A]

I literally. I can't even believe that guy's the new playboy.

[B]

That Marcelo Hernandez. Did we talk about this? That Domingo.

[A]

Yes, that's a perfect example. Like, it's like, you think he's just, like, funny and sweet, but, like, you know, he's getting. I feel like him and Sabrina Carpenter. We're gonna be a moment.

[B]

I think Kaya Gerber was rumored to have been dating him. Like, yeah, he is a charming king. I remember we walked up to the stage at the end and he, like, gave me his arm to, like, walk up there with, and I was like, okay. Wow. We weren't even, like, a sketch together. Didn't know him. And I was like, wow. So nice.

[A]

Yeah. That is crazy. Like, even, like, Pete Davidson, like, started off a silly, goofy guy. And than, like, Ariana Kim, the funny guys really do bag.

[B]

Pete Davidson is crazy how every girl is obsessed with him. I'm just like, there's something I don't see. You know, I just showed you the guy I was, like, obsessed with, and I'm like, I don't see it for Pete, but I love that people.

[A]

My power went out the other day, and the only candle I could find to light my house was a candle with Pete Davidson's face on it. And I am so embarrassed. I did. Someone got me it as a gift. I didn't buy it. I can't. I. I didn't buy it. I did, period.

[B]

You're like, not me.

[A]

No. Because I have to stop talking about Pete Davidson. It's this whole thing.

[B]

Really? He sent a cease and desist?

[A]

No, but he should.

[B]

He's like, stop right now.

[A]

No, like, literally, like, I feel for him. It's like, girl, stop.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. No. There's certain people I talk about way too much. I stopped talking about the weekend, and then, like, Jonathan Bailey is my other one. And I was just like, I need to stop because that looks weird. And I'm just being, like, obsessed.

[A]

I've done that my whole life. Like, even just with Billie Eilish, I'm like, tana, like, leave Billie alone.

[B]

Yeah. She does not want the Tiktokers around her.

[A]

Yeah. Like, it's like, oh, my God.

[B]

I don't. Like, I don't know anything, anything about her, but she seems cool. Makeup for tour.

[A]

Yes. I found out, Laura, through one of his friends that, like, if he talks about me, he refers to me as Tana Mugadoo. And I told it on the podcast. I don't. I would rather not.

[B]

Are you kidding me? I would love if someone just, like, made fun of my name and I knew who I was. That's everything.

[A]

I guess you're right. I should just own it.

[B]

Like, he knows you. Like, oh, my God. If the weekend, like, knew me, I'd.

[A]

Be like, imagine this person you were talking about, like, a lot, being like, he's scared of me. I have to stop.

[B]

I don't know. That's not. Is it bad? Because it's not like you harmed him.

[A]

Yeah, I won't either.

[B]

Just putting that out there. That's so true. It's his kink. All right, last question.

[A]

Also happily taken do not want anyone other than me.

[B]

Isn't that the tea, though? I always think that, too, with people who think I'm, like, obsessed with them. That, like, oh, Church is, like, obsessed with me or whatever. It's just like, I, like, literally, like, don't ever think about you. I talk about you.

[A]

I just love to be like, fan girls, you know, and, like, like, gag over something. But, like, yeah, we're so happy to date you.

[B]

I know. People always, like, like, concern for Moses. I feel so bad when she talks about Jonathan Bailey. I'm like, he's just like. He's like a gay British actor that I'm like, obviously never going to be with. You know what I mean? But people, like, worry for Moses. I'm like, it's fine, everybody. He was in London the same time I was on the Graham Norton show. I was like, how do I get tickets? And everyone's like, you need to leave him alone. I was like, oh, my God. I'm like, literally a fan. He's in Wicked.

[A]

No, being a fan. He's in Wicked. Okay.

[B]

Right? He's, like, the biggest star.

[A]

Being a fan is just, like. It's so fun. It, like, gives you a reason to, like, live for things. And they're so secure, our men. Imagine this, like, trip them up. They wouldn't be with us.

[B]

Moses would not care. Like, Austin Butler as Elvis. Like, I still wouldn't leave Moses. I'd be like, he wouldn't cook me bolognese on Thursday night. You know what I mean?

[A]

Like, period Queen. No. You ate without no notes. Yeah, I couldn't agree more. I could.

[B]

Sorry, Austin. It's not going to happen.

[A]

Okay, last call. God, we love. We just love taking three calls these days. This is number seven.

[B]

Okay. We did. Yeah, we ate.

[A]

Oh, we're literally Dr. Drew and Adam Corolla.

[B]

I actually would love to have Adam Carolina, because I'm like, what advice was he giving people on loveline in the 90s?

[A]

Like, that would be fun.

[B]

Straight man, just giving advice to people.

[A]

We should. Just. Because of the love line of it all, we should try.

[B]

We should have both of them on together.

[A]

Yes. I get, like, the tea icons kind of.

[B]

You know, I would fangirl, because I. I kind of did. I did watch Loveline a little bit. Even though it was like, I was like, literally eight. I was, like, kind of watching it late at night.

[A]

I need to watch one. I've never seen Loveline still.

[B]

Wait, what?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Want to know the lore behind the name? Like, what is this about? How did It. Look, you just let me pick this name. You had no idea what this show.

[A]

I shouldn't have even admitted that, to be honest with you. You don't understand your power, Trisha. You could say that you wanted to call this show, like, and I'd be like, welcome back to.

[B]

I know you were hesitant at first. Like, I don't know about the name. And I was like, oh, I really love it. So I thought maybe, like, research. And you're like, that's a pretty cool show. Yeah, let's mimic it.

[A]

Anyone else would. Anyone else would. No, I was just down truly to give some love advice. I'll watch tonight.

[B]

I'm dead. Actually, there is on YouTube, there's some clips. It's, like, really grainy and it's really funny, though. I like it.

[A]

No, I want to know.

[B]

Their advice is wild.

[A]

I should probably know, you know, considering.

[B]

We stole the concept.

[C]

Hi. I love you guys so much. I watch both of your channels and I just love y'all. I know that Trisha has been part of, like, fans and things like that. Tana has her hands. I'm not. I don't have an. But I'm actually. It's just, like, adjacent. I'm a professional cuddler. So with that being said, I just want to know, like, what you guys. If you guys are professional cuddlers, like, what would you do, Tiana? What would you do, Trisha, to, like, me the best experience for your clients? I feel like you guys would just give, like, the best advice and cool, fun ideas to just make me more money, you know? I know you guys are all about the girlies, so give me your best tips. I definitely want to implement them and see what the outcome is. All right, bye.

[A]

I would just end up them.

[B]

Stop it.

[A]

I just know I would, like, I'd be there. I'd be like, we're already here, dude.

[B]

Like, I think they want the cuddle. I think they get a. They wanted the sex. I think they just want to cuddle.

[A]

Maybe I'd be the one initiating if they're like, what?

[B]

I want to be held.

[A]

Do you feel like the prime customer is guys with mommy issues?

[B]

I don't know. Maybe I've actually never met a guy with mommy issues.

[A]

What?

[B]

What does that mean? Like, they don't have a mom in their life or what?

[A]

Yeah. Or like, they want you to be their mom. Or like, they're low key, like, upset, obsessed with their mom, like, too far.

[B]

I think I never attracted guys like that because I'm just not maternal. Like, I need everything done for me. Like, if someone wanted to be the wrong. I'm like, I don't even know how to take care of myself. How am I gonna take care of you? But you've had people that were like, you take care of me. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, I dated someone who I know for a fact he would. His mom, like, for a fact, if he could. Wow.

[B]

And so he just. He really liked cuddle. Is that where you got the cuddling?

[A]

I don't know where I got that. I'm just imagining men paying to be held. Like, what. What is the motive there? Maybe just not being held.

[B]

Good. I actually probably would have paid for a cuddler back in the day. Because when I was single, like, I could have sex, no problem, but I missed the little cuddles.

[A]

That's so true. I do love a cuddle. Like, little back tickles, back massage, like, cuddle vibe.

[B]

Guys probably get, like, shamed for it in relationships. Like, oh, I want to be cuddled. Like, what are you. Be a man. You know what I mean? Like, they probably, like, I want to be out, too, but they're, like, so scared to, like, ask for it. So maybe that's why they go to the cuddler.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I would press my boobs against their backs. Every guy that likes to be cuddled by me, I was. I remember, like. Like, I'm like, I don't want to be a big spoon, but I realized they like the boobs in the back. So I would, like, hold it really tight there. So I guess if you have your boobies, just press them against them.

[A]

Men do love that. It's called the jet pack. I like, really? When you, like, cuddle a man.

[B]

Oh, so maybe. Yeah. I mean, there could be.

[A]

I hate that, though.

[B]

Well, like, jetpack. Like, your legs are up, too around him.

[A]

Yeah, I think. I don't know. I don't know.

[B]

I mean, I would, like, spoon it, you know, like, get it in the nice formation.

[A]

But maybe men just don't want to face me. And that's why, like, behind me, I.

[B]

Love to be the little spoon. For sure.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

God. And we haven't cuddled in so long either. Especially when you have kids and they, like, sleep with you. Like, you just don't cuddle anymore. And I miss it.

[A]

No way.

[B]

I do miss it sometimes.

[A]

Like, cuddling your babies, too.

[B]

I love that. And, like, that kind of takes the place of it. I mean, it kind of doesn't because it's, like, obviously a different kind of cuddle. And I do love, like, Malibu calls it nice and cozy. Like, we'll get, like, in a blanket and get, like, nice and cozy every time after dinner. Dinner and ice cream, she always like, okay, nice and cozy. And then she'll come up and we'll, like, cuddle. A blanket.

[A]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[B]

If she, like, comes down here after, I'll be like. She'll like, probably say, like, nice and cozy. Like, she loves doing that at night. So it doesn't have different.

[A]

Cutest thing I've literally ever heard. Trisha.

[B]

I know. It's literally so cute. Yeah. You know, the influence in me is always like, I want to record that, but it's, like, not natural. If you have him do it a second time, you know, say that again. She'll be like, no, that's weird. But you always want to record because that moment, so cute.

[A]

It'd be very David Dobrik setting up the shot.

[B]

But I love that. I wish. I wish I would have known a paid cuddler. I wish I could have been a paid cuddler. I love cuddling people. Yeah. Best cuddling advice for her. Do you have any?

[A]

I mean, I literally. I don't know if I have any, actually.

[B]

I'm not a good cuddler.

[A]

I am a good cuddler, but I'm trying to think of anything, like, niche and exciting. Maybe just tell them, like, tell them you love them. Tell them that they wild.

[B]

You're just like, I love you to them. Giving them, like, false hope.

[A]

Scratch their head. Maybe I feel like a little head scratches with the acrylic nails. Like, that is like. But whenever I have to, like, break bad news to a guy or something, like, I'll always do that. Like, to McColl, I'm like, I'm gonna be late. And I'm, like, scratching his, like, background.

[B]

That's so interesting.

[A]

Like, I just always, you know.

[B]

Yeah. Maybe words of affirmation rather than, like, a full I love you. Unless you're, like, into role play or something. But, like, it made me just be like, you're enough.

[A]

Yeah, that's what I'm trying to think of. And I literally couldn't think of it. Like, okay, evil. Yeah. Like, oh, I love that. Yeah. Like, you're enough.

[B]

Yeah, you're enough. Oh, you're okay. You're safe.

[A]

I'm just a man. Oh, yeah.

[B]

That's.

[A]

That's exactly what I was trying to put into words. And thank you to my amazing co host. Like, Jesus.

[B]

Yeah. So great job. And I love that. That is Like, a thing for people to do. And I. Sometimes I'd rather just have a cuddle than sex. Yeah.

[A]

I didn't know that was, like, a job, and that's a really cool job, but it's also. Is it. I. I want to ask her. I want to get her on the phone. Like, is it ever scary? Do you ever show up for a cuddle and the guy is just, like.

[B]

So scary it's crazy. Or like you said, then they want something more, like put your hand somewhere or something. That's, like, weird, but.

[A]

Yeah, that's crazy.

[B]

Happens. But maybe she has, like, security go with her or something.

[A]

And then how do you. I guess you. I was gonna say, how do you have a boyfriend when you do that? But it's like, just find someone secure. Yeah. That's wild.

[B]

Well, you guys, thank you for watching another episode of Not Love Lying.

[A]

I feel like I learned a lot in today's episode.

[B]

I feel like I talk too much all the time in the sense of, like, maybe I need to, like, not share every single thing that you're Trisha.

[A]

Paytas and you should never stop. And it's an honor every time. Like, I just love. I love your lore, and I love.

[B]

You, but I can't wait for your 70 part. Ava. Louise.

[A]

I should have just done it when I thought the app was going down, Taking everyone down with me, starting from the beginning.

[B]

Like, you in Vegas at, like, 14 years old.

[A]

It's honestly impressive that she did that. I do not remember my life in a timeline sense. That's, like, the hardest thing with my book, too. I, like, don't even know.

[B]

You have to find someone to help you, like, organize that. Bring it out of you, but. All right. Tana's book. My book is on sale this year. Yeah, please.

[A]

Hopefully. Oh, my God. But we love you guys. If your man is out there going on car rides with your sister, asking you to do things you don't want to do, we love you.

[B]

Here is. Bye.

[A]

Bye, guys.