CONFRONTING YOUR CHEATING EX + ACCIDENTALLY PREGNANT!?

Summary

Not Loveline – Episode Summary

Podcast: Not Loveline
Hosts: Tana Mongeau & Trish Paytas
Episode Title: Confronting Your Cheating Ex + Accidentally Pregnant!?
Date: September 22, 2025

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Overview

This episode of "Not Loveline" is a vibrant, candid, and often hilarious look at love, heartbreak, family drama, and the messiness of modern relationships. Tana and Trish, in pajamas and full comfort mode, field calls from listeners seeking advice on everything from step-family estrangement and accidental pregnancy guilt to navigating breakups in friend groups and wedding party conflicts. The show’s signature is balancing wisdom earned from real (often wild) life experience with off-the-cuff banter and relatability, showcasing the healing power of best-friend support.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Setting the Tone: Comfort (00:59–03:55)

• Hosts in Pajamas: The episode kicks off with Tana and Trish describing their ultra-relatable mood—comfy, tired, and just hanging out after a big week, illustrating that sometimes showing up authentically is enough.
• Catch-up Banter: They touch on insomnia, serial killer TV shows (Dexter vs. Joe from "You"), and acting in Hollywood as themselves (“Acting is so hard. It's actually so hard.” — Tana, 08:05), providing a segue into the calls.

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1. Going No Contact with Family (10:04–15:45)

Caller: An 18-year-old who went no contact with an abusive stepmom after years of trauma, now questioning whether to reinitiate contact as others pressure her to "give grace.”

Hosts’ Advice

• Manage your expectations:
  • “If you are going to go back into this and talking to this person...put the bar in hell, right? And just accept them for who they are... Boundaries are very important.” (Trisha, 12:51)
• Don’t accept guilt from others:
  • “Don’t let someone project guilt onto you for choosing that because you obviously chose it for a reason.” (Trisha, 14:33)
• Child vs. Adult Responsibility:
  • “At the end of the day, this person was the adult... If you’re not willing to accept, you don’t have to because you were the child in this situation.” (Tana, 13:51)
• Nothing is linear:
  • “Even if you went no contact, broke it, and then wanted to go no contact again, that’s okay.” (Trisha, 15:45)

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2. Accidental Pregnancy & Infertile Friend Guilt (17:16–21:32)

Caller: One week postpartum after "failed Plan B," feels immense guilt around her best friend's infertility.

Hosts’ Advice

• Feeling guilty is normal:
  • “That guilt, it’s almost like a reverse survivor’s guilt.” (Trisha, 18:00)
• Let friend set the pace:
  • For those struggling with infertility, “saying nothing to me was the best thing.” (Tana, 18:23)
• Respect boundaries, be sensitive:
  • “Maybe...be more wary of things I’m saying coming off as rubbing it in her face.” (Trisha, 18:44)
  • “Maybe don’t bring your child around if she’s really sensitive about it.” (Tana, 19:04)
• Just be there:
  • “She will be so grateful that that is your role in her life, no matter what happens.” (Trisha, 19:47)

Memorable Exchange

• “Not the Plan B not working! That’s crazy, right?” (Tana, 17:40)

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3. Confronting a Cheating Ex at a Friend's Party (22:56–29:39)

Caller: Ex-girlfriend cheated, then left for the other woman now moving into the group. Both invited to a mutual friend's housewarming.

Hosts’ Reactions & Options

• Choose your own adventure:
  • Show up and “serve” (look amazing, bring a hot date — “subtle, devious jabs”), or skip entirely for peace.
    • “About ten years of my life, I would have showed up to that party, taken four shots, and caused hell.” (Trisha, 25:19)
• No shame in not attending:
  • “Housewarming sounds lame anyway. I’m not coming to a housewarming.” (Tana, 29:14)
• Petty suggestions (playful):
  • Trinkets of chaos like “leaving a hard-boiled egg in the bathroom cabinet” (Trisha, 29:27) or discussing the infamous “shrimp in the curtain rod” TikTok prank.
• Humanize the cheater issue:
  • They note how hard friend group politics can be and discuss the ethics of friend loyalty after cheating.

Notable Quote

• “If you can pull that off and genuinely feel unbothered...that’s a good thing to do.” (Trisha, 25:10)

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4. Coping with a Fresh Breakup—Ex On Tinder in 12 Hours (31:10–35:05)

Caller: Devastated by ex-bf (of two years) dumping her, then immediately spotted on Tinder. Hurt, angry, lost.

Hosts’ Support

• Mourn, but recognize the gift:
  • “If that man is on Tinder...thank God he did it now and the trash took itself out.” (Trisha, 32:10)
• You are not pathetic:
  • “You’re so pathetic, he’s trying to hook up with other girls and you’re here... Thank God that happened because... God protecting me for real” (Tana, 33:32)
• It’s all part of the staircase:
  • “Each person is a stair, and eventually you get to the top...and that is where your partner...is.” (Trisha, 38:14)
• Don’t look back:
  • “What's meant to be, will be... Find peace in this breakup right now and...dive into that hobby you always wanted to.” (Trisha, 39:50)

Personal Reflections

• Both hosts share moving and embarrassing stories of their own post-breakup behaviors (Tana: “I would move next to them and then we'd literally break up a week later...” 37:19).
• The importance of not seeing time as wasted but as part of the process towards finding the right partner.

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5. Wedding Party Drama: Suit or Dress? (55:58–62:03)

Caller: Bride-to-be wants her soon-to-be sister-in-law (who is gay) to “match” the bridesmaids; sister-in-law breaks down, wants to wear “men’s clothes” instead.

Hosts’ Perspectives

• Trisha’s approach:
  • “If for some reason...you don’t want to wear a pink suit...I’d want everyone to be comfortable...just ask: where would you like to stand? What would you like to wear?” (Trisha, 57:27)
• Tana’s nuance:
  • “It’s your wedding...if you had every guest wear white, and you don’t wear white, you can’t be in the photos. You know what I mean? That’s fair.” (Tana, 59:40)
  • “Give an option—do you want to be on his side and wear a tux? But you can’t be like, if you want to wear purple and everyone else is wearing black.” (Tana, 60:19)
• Find a flexible middle ground:
  • Let comfort and theme co-exist; be open, but don’t let your “vision for her” override her comfort.

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Other Discussions & Memorable Moments

- Celebrity Dating Patterns & Hollywood Age Gaps (40:59–50:59)

• Discussion of men (Mike Majlak, Leonardo DiCaprio) who “never grow up” or only date younger women: “He never dated anyone over 25, and now he has a 26-year-old girlfriend. Maybe he’ll go to 27 next.” (Tana, 49:26)
• Analysis of arrested development and Hollywood stars being “stuck” at their peak ages.

- Adoption & Parenting Reflections (66:46–71:44)

• Inspired by Millie Bobby Brown adopting, both hosts reflect on their own thoughts about adopting, being older parents, intergenerational gaps, and personal family trauma.
• “I just think adoption is the most beautiful thing in the world...there’s so many people to save and give a beautiful life.” (Trisha, 67:15)

- Mutual Admiration & Show Impact (72:53–78:39)

• Emotional listener call lauding their dynamic: “Trish, I feel like you are healing Tana's inner child, and same for you, Trish. I feel like Tan is healing you in a sense.” (Caller “Sophia”, 73:53)
• Both hosts celebrate their growing friendship, fan community, and dream up the idea of a live variety show tour: “We want to do a telethon too.” (Trisha, 79:53)

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Notable Quotes (by Timestamp)

• “Boundaries are very important...even if you go back into contact, it might mean that it's one call a week. You go into that interaction calm in who you are.” – Trisha, 12:51
• “Don’t let someone project guilt onto you for choosing [no contact]...it's equally right whatever you decide.” – Trisha, 14:33
• “That guilt, it’s almost like a reverse survivor's guilt…” – Trisha, 18:00
• “You have the right to cause hell, and you have the right to choose peace. Pick whichever one you want.” – Trisha, 27:08
• “If that man is on Tinder...the trash took itself out.” – Trisha, 32:10
• “Each person is a stair, and eventually you get to the top of that staircase, and that is where your partner is.” – Trisha, 38:14
• “It’s your wedding. I love that you’re flexible, but...if your vision for her hurts her feelings, maybe try to cater.” – Tana/Trisha, 59:40/60:19
• “I feel like Tana is healing Trish in a sense. And Trish is healing Tana’s inner child.” – Sophia (Caller), 73:53

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Family Estrangement / Step-parent No Contact: 10:04–15:45
• Pregnancy & Infertility Support: 17:16–21:32
• Confronting Cheating Ex at Party: 22:56–29:39
• Breakup & Ex On Tinder: 31:10–35:05
• Wedding Party Queer Inclusion Dilemma: 55:58–62:03
• Adoption/Parenting Reflections: 66:46–71:44
• Fan Impact & Not Loveline Tour Dreams: 72:53–78:39

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Closing Tone

The episode closes on a heartwarming note, reflecting on the healing dynamic between Tana and Trish and the community they've built. The hosts invite the possibility of a live tour and express deep gratitude and mutual support, exemplifying how friendship and shared stories can be both an entertainment and a source of true healing.

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For listeners:
You'll laugh, commiserate, and probably text your best friend after listening. Whether you're dealing with heartbreak or negotiating in-law drama, Tana and Trish promise that peace (and just the right hit of petty revenge) can coexist—and so can a little healing, even if it's accidental.

Transcript

[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

Gain skills you can learn today and apply tomorrow. Get ready to go from make it.

[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

Including at 2121 15th Street north in Arlington, Virginia.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, I want to forgive her and I want peace and all of these things. Yeah, I've always wanted to have a housewarming party, but when I move in there's just like backwood guts on the floor and then u haul box.

[Tana Mongeau]

What backwoods guts?

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, that's such a good question. Trisha. Boyfriend on Tinder immediately after a two year breakup.

[Tana Mongeau]

Hello? Ring, ring. Who's calling?

[Trisha Paytas]

Who's calling? We love you guys.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, oh yes. But also not loveliness Calling.

[Trisha Paytas]

And we love not Loveline and not Loveline is calling. Calling. Today we have set the goal to make the most professional episode ever.

[Tana Mongeau]

Calls. Prepare for a telethon because that's what's happening today.

[Trisha Paytas]

Call us at this number right here.

[Tana Mongeau]

Ask us your questions. We have 15000 messages to go through. But what's 15000 more?

[Trisha Paytas]

Honestly, we're gonna go through all of them. Yeah, right.

[Tana Mongeau]

Today Devin's like, what? Madison Square Garden will go through all of them. I think we'll have the time.

[Trisha Paytas]

100.

[Tana Mongeau]

What if we just take a question from everyone at Madison Square Garden? Like everyone can submit their question. We answer all of them.

[Trisha Paytas]

Just speed round. It's like, should I break up with them?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like just next. And our Patreon.

[Tana Mongeau]

Patreon.

[Trisha Paytas]

I've been trying to give even more on the Patreon sharing.

[Tana Mongeau]

So good on the last one because.

[Trisha Paytas]

I just never wanted to be the same or be redundant. So I was really sharing some stories from my past that I would want to Tell Jimmy to cut out. But it's on the Patreon, so we're leaving.

[Tana Mongeau]

Shocking me. I was like, wait, what is this? I need to know.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, I got out on a roof. I let into the details and it was, it was a great episode.

[Tana Mongeau]

It was everything. I loved it. No, that was a good one. So go to patreon.com notloveling today to get a bonus episode every Friday. We love you guys over there so much and we're gonna take calls, but just how are you feeling? We're in our pajamas. We just ate some food. You ate a salad, which I love.

[Trisha Paytas]

I did not love my kale moment. But I just, I do have a sensitive stomach sometimes and I'm trying to because even right now, if I just ate Taco Bell, which is what I wanted, I would be like, hey guys, like I'm having one of those days and I'm just trying to listen to my body.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, you would never know. It's so funny. You have been doing so much this week and even going through like the most and like in between you'll say it, but then once the camera's on, you're just like on. All of a sudden you look like perfect. You're fine. I'm like, you're totally fine.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I'm honestly just tired. You sometimes you have weeks where you don't get as much sleep and you work on a lot of things and you're stressed, but it's, it's all blessed. So I've been trying not to about it too much today, how tired I am. But we're in our pajamas. But you can tell.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, if, yeah, we're comfy. But you should like if you're tired, you should, you know, that's good to. Sorry if I'm slow, I'm like, you're not at all.

[Trisha Paytas]

But like no, literally today we were just in the room changing and I was like, sorry Trisha, if I'm so slow, like I am just like so tired. But like, you're a businessman. Insomnia is like the worst.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, you stayed up late.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, even if I have the longest day and wake up early, I stay up until 3am what were you doing last night? Watching the new Dexter and I have the new one. Yeah. Michael C. Hall signed a lifelong contract. I think he is cranking out roles as Dexter. I think forever. But he's so good and it's my favorite show of all time. So I like serial killer.

[Tana Mongeau]

Uh huh.

[Trisha Paytas]

But he kills serial killers. Okay, so he's like, he's on his vigilante.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

Most of the time.

[Tana Mongeau]

He's like a bounty hunter or what kind of thing?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, like, he just, like, if he sees someone doing something bad, he. Because he has the urge to kill. You know what I mean? But, like, he channeled it into this code, which is, like, only if someone fits it. If they are a bad person, they're a predator, they're hurting children, they're whatever.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love that. Okay, so he's, like, channeling that to something good.

[Trisha Paytas]

His.

[Tana Mongeau]

What's his name?

[Trisha Paytas]

His name is Dexter on the show. Yeah. Oh, Dexter Morgan.

[Tana Mongeau]

Dexter who. Who do you like better? Dexter Morgan or. Who's the hot one that we always.

[Trisha Paytas]

Joe from you. I think Joe from you is a Dexter ripoff. I love it more than anything ever. I think it's one. It's such a great show, and I love Dexter, so I love. And I might get some hate for saying that, but I mean, the monologue, like, the inner monologue, like, that was Dexter. Dexter. Like that. Dexter created that.

[Tana Mongeau]

And which one is better than. Okay, maybe he copied, but which one is better?

[Trisha Paytas]

Dexter is better.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

So much better. It's. I think Joe from you is more made for, like, today's society where we, like, romanticize him and, like, it's a little, like, hotter of a show. Dexter is more, like, psychological and emotional and, like, I don't know. And now Dexter has a kid. So, like, there's this whole, like, development of. That's been across. I've been watching Dexter for, like, over 10 years. You know, like, oh, my God, I.

[Tana Mongeau]

Didn'T know it was on that long.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, like, so you're just very attached and. I don't know. It's. It's the blueprint for shows like that. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, so everyone. Yeah, there's. Because there's a lot of serial killer shows these days.

[Trisha Paytas]

So, like, the inner monologue, serial killer that you love and are rooting for.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Is. And Joe from you. Like, he also was, like, selfish and, like, was killing for his own reasons, and a lot of innocent people died. And in the end of that, you kind of. That's kind of what that finale is. Is like, oh, like, Joe needs to die and he's not a good person. Whereas, like, Dexter, like, he's, like, a good person for the most part. Some. Some innocent people definitely have gotten hurt from his antics.

[Tana Mongeau]

Why don't they do a female version of these shows? How come they never a girl one?

[Trisha Paytas]

They should. I've never thought I'VE literally never thought.

[Tana Mongeau]

Because, like, that everyone loves Charlize Theron and Monster. So it' like, why don't they do, like, a tv, like, series about that? Because it was just kind of the same thing. She was, like, killing, like, awful men, and we're like, get it.

[Trisha Paytas]

I love that they. In this new season of Dexter, there is a female serial killer, like, plot line. And I was like, wow, Dexter didn't have a lot of that. You're right. It's much more like, male. Lots. Lots of males. We should even, like, oh, my God. Like, a Margot Robbie in her. That's why I love Gone Girl. I think that's why Gone Girl is my favorite movie because she is, like, the man did her wrong. She's doing some crazy. It's all in her monologue. Like, Dexter and Joe and like, so.

[Tana Mongeau]

They'Re reheating their nachos. Is that first Gone Girl sounds like it's old.

[Trisha Paytas]

Gone Girl maybe was. I don't know. They're. They're different enough that I wouldn't say Gone Girl reheated Dexter's nachos. But, like, the monologue, I don't know. It is.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know what? Maybe this week and I'll watch it. That's like, one movie. Because you talk about it a lot, and I didn't really need to watch it.

[Trisha Paytas]

It is, like, it's nuts. It's so nice.

[Tana Mongeau]

I would love to bring it up with you if I become obsessed with something. Like, I would love to bring it up to, like, that would be, like, so fun.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I think you would like it because we love to see a woman, like, a man being and he's cheating on her with, like, Emily Ratajkowski plays the character that Ben Affleck. Is this movie so old? No, it's that long.

[Tana Mongeau]

Really.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's like, it might be 10 years old. 2014.

[Tana Mongeau]

I thought she's, like, so young. I thought she's, like, 25.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, no, she's in her 30s for sure. She was young in that movie, like 8. And she's probably a girl. With Ben Affleck, she's the mistress, like, and so then Rosamund pike plays, like, Gone Girl, like, the main character. She finds out he's cheating on her with Emily Ratajkowski, and she goes nuts.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

But enough Gone Girl talk on not Loveline.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'll shut up. I love Emily Ratatohsky. That show I was telling you about too much. Did I tell you about that with Meg Salter?

[Trisha Paytas]

I want to watch that.

[Tana Mongeau]

She's she's the other girl in that one, too. Well, kind of like, yeah. Meg Stalter's, like, boyfriend leaves her for.

[Trisha Paytas]

I love seeing Emily Ratajkowski in her acting era.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love her, too. I think she's, like, so beautiful. I loved her in the Amy Schumer. She always, like, a hot girl. She always, like, the one that, like.

[Trisha Paytas]

She was on icarly and she played, like, Gibby's.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wow.

[Trisha Paytas]

Gibby. For my. Carly's girlfriend.

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't know. I hardly.

[Trisha Paytas]

Or, like, when she was, like. I don't even know. She was 18. That might have been, like, her first role.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wow. I didn't know. I thought she was, like, a really pretty model. I didn't know.

[Trisha Paytas]

I know. And then she'll just, like, pop out and act, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm so good at it, too, because acting is not easy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, acting is. Acting is hard. It's actually so hard. And I'm like. I don't think.

[Trisha Paytas]

I think it's because you and I, too, are just, like, very, like, the type of headstrong people who are very, like, our Persona is our Persona. Like, it's who we are to our core. It's hard for me to, like, imagine being anyone else. I love it. Sometimes I think it's hard for other.

[Tana Mongeau]

People to imagine us as anyone else who's like, Kim Kardashian. Like, she's, like, in theory, a good actress, but you do see her just be Kim Kardashian all the shows she's on, which is, like, fine.

[Trisha Paytas]

But I loved her on American Horror Story.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes, she was great. But she was. She was Kim.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, she was Chris, honestly.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, it's giving your Kim Kardashian, but I don't think it's her fault. I think it's like, us, too. Like, you'll just always see, yeah. You as Tana, no matter what you're on.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's so true. It's like.

[Tana Mongeau]

But maybe not. Maybe you could be. I shouldn't say that. Me as Trisha. You could always. For sure. But you could. Maybe you could. You never know. Like, you could be like, a Liza.

[Trisha Paytas]

Have your, like, cosplay, where, like, you're like, I'm a tavern girl today. Like, I don't even have that. Like, I'm Tanner in the tavern.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, you should do a legit tavern. I don't know if we've ever done, like, a legit one, but I feel like you actually. We did do one.

[Trisha Paytas]

We did one, but I would do another one with you. Anytime.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love your accent, your little.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it's so funny because you in the tavern is actually such a big part of my life because the video of you in the tavern played it all. Every single canceled podcast live show ever. That's so. And, like, it's. It'll be such a core memory of mine forever. Because, like. And let's say a crowd was more quiet. They're going insane for that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, yes.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's the direct middle of the show, so it's like the moment where it's like, the show changes and stuff.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, it is such a ingrained in.

[Trisha Paytas]

Your head, core memory. And, like, I could, like, recite your entire town video, like, word for word, just because I would hear it every night.

[Tana Mongeau]

What an honor to be a part of it. And that was the best.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I'd be like, somewhere in the middle of nowhere and, like, turn around and see you and be like, oh, that's my girl. She's back at home. I'll see you soon.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's how I felt. You were the intro of our show, like, right before I'd come out, it was like a little just Trish montage. And you're, like, right there. And you'd always get, like, the biggest scream, and I'm like, oh, yeah. So good. And then I'd like.

[Trisha Paytas]

We have the best fans. Speaking of, let's get to a call. We're gonna talk to them today.

[Tana Mongeau]

What a transition. We're gonna talk. All right, first call.

[Caller 1]

Hey, Trisha. Hey, Tana. I really love you guys to the moon and back. I love you guys so, so much. I wanted some advice on going, coming back from really no contact. Me and my stepmom, I've had her in my life since I was around 10 or 11. After my mom passed away, she was physically and verbally abusive. And there were really good times and also really bad times. I'm now 18 and going to college, and I haven't talked to her since November. It's August. There was a really bad incident with the cops in the hospital, and it was not my fault, but, you know, and so I was just wondering, because recently I've had a lot of people tell me I should give her grace, give her her flowers, that she's changed and that she's bettered herself. But me personally, I just feel like I need to protect my peace because I have a lot of people that step over me, and I'm very susceptible to that. So that's why I cut her off. But I don't know if I'M not completely closed off the forgiveness, but I also think that I want to keep up my guard for a little bit. Tana, I know you have your experience with going no contact. I was wondering how you think I should go about this. And, you know, if there ever, if you ever think there is going to be a time for me to get past this and come in contact with her again, I love you both so much and thank you for the advice.

[Trisha Paytas]

Wow. I could answer this question for an hour and a half, to be honest with you. It was such a layered question. But I will try to keep it concise so we can take as many calls as possible. I think it's. I think narcissism and no contact is a different situation. I have a lot more like, I look at no contact for other reasons with almost different eyes because I think that it's much harder to get a narcissist to change whereas other people, like, maybe she was struggling with something else and she has completely changed and she is completely healed and there's so reasoning to have like a whole new path with this person. Right. There were a couple things that you said though, that I just want to like, touch on where you were kind of saying, you know, I. I want to forgive her and I want peace and all of these things. And regardless of if you go back into contact or not, you still forgive this person and make full peace with it, no matter what. My biggest advice would be manage your expectations. Like, if you are going to go back into this and talking to this person. I think that where you could end up getting really hurt or disheartened is if you expect them to be something completely different. And then you come in and maybe you still see glimpses of this person that you once went no contact with or they let you down, you could find yourself back in a lower place, maybe where you once were. So manage and you know what I mean? Maybe put the bar in hell, right? And just accept them for who they are and be like, if I'm bringing this person back in and they haven't changed a bit. Like, I would just try to be as accepting of you as you can of their mental illnesses and their weak suits and their whatever. And just also boundaries are very important, you know, just like accepting them back into no contact might mean that it's one call a week, right? And you go into that call with a certain headspace and one interaction a week and you go into that interaction calm in who you are and don't let them get those rises out of you and don't play into those things and just tread with caution, you know? And I love you, and I just want to protect your heart and your peace. And I do believe some people go no contact, and then they break it and new history is rewritten and beautiful things can happen. You know, that's. That's my.

[Tana Mongeau]

More to add to that. Like, I love it. And I do think the only other thing I'd say is, you know, like, I love this air of no contact, because, like, again, it wasn't, like, around when I was a kid, and I wish it was especially certain people. But I also do think if you do decide that, like, I mean, at the end of the day, this person was the adult, and, like, whether they healed or growed, if you're, like, not willing to, like, or you don't want to accept, you don't have to because you were the child in this situation. So I do feel like there's, like, a lot more grace for you as the child. And it's great if, like, an adult learns, grows, becomes a different person. But it's like, trauma as a child is trauma as a child. It's, like, hard to break. It's hard to, like, get out of that trauma. So I don't think there's parts of me that, like, want to go no contact with people who traumatized me as a child. I'm like, maybe I should. Even though it's been like, 25 years, it's like, it's still a lot of trauma that person caused me, you know? And, yeah, but I think you had the best experience.

[Trisha Paytas]

So your advice was, no, but that's. That's so real, like, what you're saying. And I even. There was something in this that, like, I really struggled with, because I noticed how much when I would tell people that I was no contact, they'd be like, well, that's your mom and that's your dad, and give them grace. And I had to almost seek out, like, that was where Reddit was really helpful for me. Like, no contact. Reddit, like, saved my life. You know what I mean? Hearing people's stories and knowing it was for me and that there were people who understood. But don't let people also guilt you into that, because people love to project their own experiences of family and their own definitions of that or project their own things onto you. And, like, I don't know, just hearing that, it could just be people, and it almost always is people who just love you, and that's their idea of family and their idea of life. And like, it's not a bad thing. Those people aren't bad people. But don't let someone project, like, guilt onto you for choosing that because you obviously chose it for a reason and it's equally as right, whatever you decide, you know.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, yeah, because you didn't deserve that. And also, you seem like you're in an era where you're choosing peace, so don't let anybody that up and just have your boundaries and, you know, peace always. Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

Give peace a chance. Yes. Love that question. Oh my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my love you. And you got this regardless of what you do. And nothing is linear, you know, like, just even if you went no contact, like broke it and then wanted to go no contact again and what that's okay, you know, like, yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

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[Tana Mongeau]

Thank you DraftKings Casino for sponsoring today's episode of Not Love Lying.

[Caller 2]

Hey, Trish and Tana. I'm one week postpartum from having my first baby. He is truly a blessing, but sort of an accident. The plan B didn't come through, but I'm glad it didn't. But my bestest friend is having fertility problems and can't get pregnant and I just don't know what to say because I accidentally got pregnant, and she's actively trying. How can I help her through this?

[Trisha Paytas]

Love, y'.

[Tana Mongeau]

All. Not the plan B. Not working. That's crazy, right?

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[Tana Mongeau]

Right? I always think about you when I think a plan B. Because you're the only one that, like, opens up, openly talks about it, and I love it.

[Trisha Paytas]

I know. I really do. I'm out of my plan B.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, you should talk about it. I love being. I love the openness of it. You're out of shame.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's true. But that is very hard.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's so hard.

[Trisha Paytas]

And just feeling that. That guilt, it's almost like a reverse, like, survivor's guilt. I don't know how to explain that. Like, it's. You know what I mean? Because it happened. But everything happens for a reason, and you were meant to have this baby, and you shouldn't feel guilty, you know, like, just. That's a beautiful blessing, but I understand also loving your best friend. Like, I can't imagine if that was, like, if I were you and Isabella Ashley, like, I would be heartbroken for that person.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. It's a such a fine line. There's, like, no right answer because it's, like, your friend and you want to help her through it. But I don't know, sometimes. Oh, I don't know. That's tough. Like, for me, as someone who, like, couldn't have babies, like, saying nothing to me was the best thing. Like, I don't. You know, but maybe she's trying to. I don't know, something to comfort someone who's struggling when you had it, like, easy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. And I think maybe just let her know that, like, what's meant for her is gonna be for her and just be there for her and listen to her vet and talk about it and, you know, I guess if I were in that situation, I would probably also just be a little more wary of things I'm saying coming off as, like, rubbing it in her face or, like. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Cause it's not your fault, obviously. And, yeah, like, you said, like, you should celebrate pregnancies. For me, it's like when I. When I saw people, like, have pregnancy announcements and I wasn't getting pregnant, I would just, like, mute people. I was, like, unfollow people because it was, like, so frustrating.

[Caller 1]

And.

[Tana Mongeau]

But yeah, even though it's, like, not your fault and you shouldn't, like, hide your baby, but, you know, like, when I go. When you go into, like, I Had a high risk doctor during all my pregnancies that would do my ultrasounds for me. And they wouldn't let you bring your kids in. Like, you know, like, you couldn't bring kids in because so many people were going through, like, losses and stuff like that. So in that sense, I would say if she's, like, really sensitive about it, to, like, not bring your child around because it's like, again, not your fault, not the babies, but, like, maybe that person might get, like, triggered seeing your kid. Like, just like, in the doctor's office, they don't, like, encourage you to bring kids to those facilities because they don't want other people to feel triggered, you know?

[Trisha Paytas]

And I think that in the hardest times of my life, I always remember the people who were just sat by me and listened to me vent and still rooted me on and, like, you know what I mean? Like, she will be so grateful that that is your role in her life, no matter what happens, and that is your purpose. You know what I mean? And maybe she will eventually find it very cathartic being an auntie as well through all of this. And there is some beautiful, harmonious reason this was supposed to happen for you at this time and why her time is either to come or whatever ends up happening for her path. And you guys will get there. And you're just. You're a very good friend. I just want to give you your flowers for calling in and caring and. Yeah, just supporting.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wanting to know how to support her is very nice to ask. And everyone is different. Like you said, some people will, like, thrive being an auntie. And. Yeah, you know, some people just can't be around babies until they have theirs. But I do. I do believe. Yeah, like you said, there'll be that time for your friend 100%.

[Trisha Paytas]

And you are just a good friend for writing for her through all of that. And the world needs good friends like you.

[Tana Mongeau]

And we love you and congrats. Oh, my God. One week postpartum.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I love that even that seems so hard. I couldn't even pick up a phone.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, one week is crazy. One week is so hard. Me trying to go to My Chemical Romance. One week postpartum. How do I get to Dodger Stadium? How can. It's like walking 10 miles. I was like, that's crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

You're on a gurney.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. I was like, how do I get there? And I was like, God, that's so much.

[Trisha Paytas]

But, oh, to beat your should pay this, because if you really wanted to go on a gurney, like, like, we Would have made it happen.

[Tana Mongeau]

Everything but so real. I feel you, girl. I love her watching that loveline one week.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, we love you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Let me call in. Yeah. Congrats. Oh my God, that's so exciting. And it's so exciting that you had your baby.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Congratulations. And she's the plan B and she still had the baby. So like, you know, that's kind of cool. Like you could.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's also some advice within itself. Everybody. The people taking plan B. Yeah, yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love it. I love that story. Okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

We love you.

[Tana Mongeau]

That baby came through.

[Trisha Paytas]

These were very wholesome. And Devin has a smile like, this next one's not going to be.

[Tana Mongeau]

We are. I love it.

[Trisha Paytas]

I love giving advice too.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. You're like so. I love advice too. I do love giving advice.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Cuz it like we always talk about this, but it feels like there's a purpose.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Yeah, it is. It's like we live life for a reason.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Thank you guys for giving us a purpose and your patience with our lack of calls.

[Caller 2]

Hi, Trish and Tana. Love you guys. I've culted quite a few times, but basically my ex girlfriend cheated on me and dumped me me and is now moving to the city with the girl that they cheated on me with. And we're all in the same friend group and I get it. Like, breakups in a friend group are hard. But my best friend is having a housewarming party and she did in fact let me know that my ex and that the girl she cheated on me with is going to be at the housewarming party. And I don't know what to do. I did have a full on panic attack. I'm not sure what the right option is. A big part of me wants to be like, oh, like I can show up, like show them what they're missing. Another part of me is like, I like that's gonna destroy me to see them and I would just rather not engage with that. So what do you think? Thanks. Love ya.

[Trisha Paytas]

We're laughing off camera because Amari definitely has some history with dating within the friend group and navigating it.

[Tana Mongeau]

We were just talking about that while you're in the bathroom. He was talking about like the friend group situation, how he wasn't like Coachella, why he didn't go to Coachella and all stuff like that. Yeah, it was uncomfortable. Yeah. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And obviously it was a little different than this story and much more layered. And violence is never the answer. Violence is never the answer. Amari wants to give that advice even though he Definitely thought it was the answer for a second there. He chose violence, and then he chose peace, which is real. You know that's real. That's funny, because there are two. I was gonna tell her to choose violence, so now I'm rerouting. What do you think? Would you. I. I think that's hard.

[Tana Mongeau]

Was she Halloween? Is that what she's saying? A Halloween party.

[Trisha Paytas]

Housewarming. Oh, yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

What is that?

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, new house we're warming.

[Tana Mongeau]

Come come see our house.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Yeah. I've always wanted to have a housewarming party, but when I move in, there's just, like, backwood guts on the floor, and then u haul box.

[Tana Mongeau]

What is backwards guts?

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, that's such a good question, Trisha.

[Tana Mongeau]

I've never.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, when you roll a, it comes with tobacco in it. Anyways, that's the guts. Anyway.

[Tana Mongeau]

Sounds better than.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, the guts is a gnarly word.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Dating in the friend group. Don't do it. Maybe.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Well, I mean, this situation is more. Because it's like, you got cheated on and she wants to bring her the new Chidi in, and I'm assuming she, your ex girlfriend, is a part of the friend group, so that's why she's allowed. And then now she's bringing the new. And this. There are so many answers to this situation. Right? Like, you cannot go and choose peace, and. But that's also a feeling because you want to be around all of your friends, and you are welcome. So it's like you can choose violence and be insane, and you have every right to because you were cheated on. And you could bring a new date and try to act unbothered and love that option. If you can pull that off and genuinely feel unbothered and all of those things, that's also a good thing to do.

[Tana Mongeau]

Or bring a date and see if the other person's bothered. Just, like, make out that new date at the party and see if that person gets bothered, and then they love you. Yes. Yeah. Be like, ooh, he's mad. She's mad.

[Trisha Paytas]

Exactly. Like, there's so many routes you can take. And I think that this situation is very situational, you know? Like, it's whatever route you want to take. For about 10 years of my life, I would have showed up to that party, taken four shots, and caused hell. Caused hell for my ex and the Chidi. Like, I can't even lie, you know? Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

The cheater should always be exiled. It's like in a prenup. Like, the cheaters should never get money, should never Collect go like all that stuff. Like, you know what I mean? Like, it should never be that. Like they should not get to be a part of the friend group anymore. Like, if they cheated on you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. And there's almost. Because even when I'm thinking about this past situation, like that wasn't the case and it made it harder that like Amari and Ty are both like good people. You know what I mean? Like, that made it harder for everyone to navigate because it was like, you know what I mean? Like, whereas it is almost more frustrating as her because she's like, you know what I mean? Like, why the guys keeping this awful person.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Like, they cheated on me. They should never be in this friend group. Yes.

[Trisha Paytas]

But also, I don't know the lore like that that girl could have been friends with all these people for like just as long, if not longer. And like the way that like you gotta ride for your besties even if they cheat. Like, it's, you know.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wait, really? Is that the rule? No, never. I don't know. I don't have friends though. I don't know what the rule is. But I feel like I would not talk to them anymore.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, no, I don't know if, like, if Amari got into a relationship and cheated on someone, like, I would definitely scold me.

[Tana Mongeau]

But you'd be like, yeah, siblings I get. Yeah. Give my sister cheats. I'm like, well, like, don't do that. Right?

[Trisha Paytas]

You know? Yeah, like, that's not the. Don't do that for your pain and to cause a other pain on good people.

[Tana Mongeau]

But you don't want to have like, but nobody at Thanksgiving. You're like, well, I'm gonna see you at holidays.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, I'm not exiling like my besties for that. So.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's true. That's true.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's so layered. I think that you have the right to cause hell and you have the right to choose peace. And you should pick whichever one you want. I'm telling you that up until the last two years of my life, I would have caused hell. And you do it though.

[Tana Mongeau]

What about now?

[Trisha Paytas]

Now I wouldn't cause hell, but I would serve. Yeah, I. I would show up looking as just sickening as I could. I would probably invite a date who was just mogging those two losers. And I would probably throw subtle, devious jabs.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, how?

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, you know, just, oh, what are you doing for work now? Like, I'd find the thing that, like, I'd find. I'd find whatever the thing is, you know what I mean, I'd be like, oh, do you still like that thing that you like? I'd be asking the new girlfriend, like, does she love and make something up too that doesn't even exist? Does she love having her ear bitten? You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

I love that.

[Trisha Paytas]

I know. And then like she doesn't love having her ear bitten. So the new girl's like, oh my God, she doesn't like me as much. I'd be evil. Well, I don't know if the new girl also knew that she was the cheatie, that she was the accomplice.

[Tana Mongeau]

Right.

[Trisha Paytas]

So then she might be innocent and all this too. And then the ex is the only person. It's so layered, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

We don't know if the cheat, he was brought in maybe was in the friend group.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, that'd be crazy to like cheat with someone in the friend group. I guess it's better.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. In that case, I'm committing arson.

[Tana Mongeau]

But then you arson. But then you're two friends against one. It's like, well, I guess we'll keep the cheaters because we're. We've been friends with two of them. It's better than losing one friend.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh my. I don't. I. Oh, someone's going to jump. Yeah, it's hard. It's violence or peace. It's whatever you're feeling. I think that who I am today. Yeah. I would like serve. I would throw. I would throw really subtle violence in there. It wouldn't be violence.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's great.

[Trisha Paytas]

And just, you know, little jabs. Little. I'd wear a really good corset top. I'd wear a.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay. I love it.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, I would.

[Tana Mongeau]

Cutesy. Nothing crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

I also have always been the person who does like kind of show up and subject myself to those things. Like, I also respect the out of like staying home, watching your favorite movie, maybe going on a hinge date, Skipping that thing. Just. Just skipping the housewarming. But it is feeling.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, housewarming sounds lame. Anyways, I'm not coming to a housewarming.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, you in your house house. You and your house of cheaters and.

[Tana Mongeau]

Your guts in the back. Yes. They probably have so much guts back there you don't even want to see it. Yes.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, that's kind of funny too. Like you could go to the housewarming and you could just plant the guts. You could just leave like a hard boiled egg in the bathroom cabinet. Nothing, nothing too mean. Just a little.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, it's not the cheater's house, is it?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, I got more violet as it went on.

[Tana Mongeau]

Crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Just one hard boiled egg, though. Nothing crazy. They'll find it. You know, people leave shrimp in people's shower curtain rods. That's okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

Why?

[Trisha Paytas]

Because then, like, they'll never find out where the smell is coming from. And, like, shrimp like that is allegedly. Yeah, I'm on that side of tick tock. I really am.

[Tana Mongeau]

This plant is crazy. I feel like your chair got pushed back because it was never this in your hair before.

[Trisha Paytas]

I know.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's. It's on.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's giving bang. It's giving like emo. It's giving mcr side bank. It's because I found out that if I sit in this little corner of the chair that my right hip doesn't hurt. We can take call.

[Tana Mongeau]

The chair itself should come forward more. I feel like you could be in.

[Trisha Paytas]

The corner, but I'm owning it. It's me in this plan against the world today.

[Tana Mongeau]

Closest to move it out next night.

[Trisha Paytas]

I love you. I'm like, I love you in the plant.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's just so funny, but I love it.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, it's me finding the plant. I need a compilation.

[Tana Mongeau]

You are like, in the jungle. I love it.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes, I know. With my leopard. I do feel like a jungle baddie. Okay, who else has issues? I'm choosing violence today. Some episodes, I'm so like, yeah, but.

[Tana Mongeau]

I like that one. The hardwood egg was great. And the shrimp idea is good too.

[Trisha Paytas]

Shrimp is. That's. But shrimp is diabolical. That's what you do to, like, the cheater's house, not like the random house. I'm gonna get in trouble for something I said on not Loveline. One day, someone's gonna do it.

[Tana Mongeau]

Never. Don't manifest it.

[Trisha Paytas]

You're right. We're clean girlies here.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, we're all good vibes.

[Caller 2]

Oh, sorry I sound so annoying, but my boyfriend of two years just broke up with me and then was on Tinder after less than 12 hours after we're dating and pieces for that. And she broke up because he suddenly wanted to go out with his friends more after not drinking. Our entire two year relationship with me once, but every time he's out with his friends. And I just don't know how to overcome this because it's obvious he's a piece of. It's so hard. Okay, thanks. Love y'.

[Tana Mongeau]

All.

[Trisha Paytas]

First of all, you're not annoying. She said sorry for being annoying. You're not annoying.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, what, like, thank you for calling.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. And we love you. And I can just tell you're an icon even through this, even through what you're going through.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, thank you. Bye.

[Trisha Paytas]

Boyfriend on Tinder immediately after a two year breakup. And we love Tinder, okay? But we do not love this situation.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, go on that double date, girl. Get on the Tinder double date.

[Trisha Paytas]

Not sponsoring this podcast, but I will say, like, I know you're in the trenches right now of the pain, and you gotta feel the pain, right? Like, you know, you just. There's nothing else you can do but go through it. You know what I mean? And that's a good thing too, because bottling up pain never works. Well, I think you feel it. You watch the sad movies, you eat the ice cream, you cry. It's two years of your life. You gotta mourn it. However, if that man is on Tinder and broke up with you to just go party and whatever, like, that's not your man. And like, and I don't mean that in a way that you should be sad. I mean that in a way that, like, thank God he did it now and the trash took itself out. And you know what I mean? Like, if he wants to be on Tinder 24 hours prior after dumping someone who loves him so much, that's. That's not for you. And you deserve someone who wants to stay in and do the cute things and go on the cute dates and go out with you and not his friends. And you know what I mean, like, have fun with you. And I always say, like, to anyone going through a breakup, it's so hard to not want to go back. And it's so hard to not be sad and to not miss it. All those things can be true. But congratulations is the biggest thing on this new era of your life. And it will get better. We've been sitting today laughing, like, so much about all of our past, like, things that we thought were be all end alls, you know, Actually crazy to.

[Tana Mongeau]

Think, like, anyone I thought I would end up with, like, is wild and like, like you, girl, I was the same. Like, I would, like, still be hooking up with, like, people who broke up with me. And then I would see, like on their iPad, them on like, Raya talking to like, these girls. And it would be like, so devastating and so awful. But I'm like, thank God that happened because, like, I would see it enough times and eventually I'm like, what am I doing? This is like, so. You're so pathetic. He's trying to hook up with other girls and you're here because no one wants to hook up with. So you're like, the, like, last resort. And it's, like, so embarrassed. Like, for me personally, it was embarrassing. And. But those people I thought I was gonna end up with, like, I. I look back now or think now, even like, with kids, with them all stuff like that, I'm like, thank God. Oh, my God. That was, like, God protecting me for real. Because it would have been the worst situation. It'd be me raising kids by myself with someone who, like, doesn't like me. You know what I mean? It would have been the worst situation. Worst, worst. Like, when I think back to, like, people I dated and was so in love with, like, and it's not on them. It was just, like, the worst person for me. People for me, like, yes, they weren't for you.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I want to go back to that tana, like, crying on the bathroom floor and be like, no, no, no. Congratulations. And people are meant to be chapters, too. Like, this is not even saying that person's. So you should have never dated them. Like, no, no, no. You. Sometimes people are meant to align at a certain point, and then you never align again. You know what I mean? Sometimes people are meant to teach you all of the lessons so that you can be a certain version for your next partner and stronger and better. And that's what this person was for you was lots of lessons. It's not that he shouldn't have ever happened, but it being done is as big of a blessing as the lessons that you've learned, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

And, yeah, that's a good, good point, because I always think, oh, man, I wasted my time. But I do feel like that time has led you to your next spot. You know, whatever that year was that you needed with that person has led you to, like, the next, next, you know, area. Thank you so much to RO for sponsoring today's episode of Not Loveline. You guys, healthcare is not just about your physical health. It is how you feel, how you show up for work, for friends, and for family. So make sure you prioritize your health. And RO can help you by doing their free assurance checker to see if GLP ones like wegovia or Ozempic are right for you. Let's face it, sometimes we put our healthcare on the back burner because insurance is confusing. What number do we call? What's my policy number? Do you cover this? Let me get back to you. I don't want people in the. In the waiting room seeing me. I don't want other people knowing my business.

[Trisha Paytas]

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[Trisha Paytas]

Thank you, RO, for sponsoring today's episode.

[Tana Mongeau]

Of Not Loveline and all that stuff like that. Because even, like, physical area, like, I would move. This was like a pattern with like, every single guy I've, like, ever dated. Whether it was like, casually or seriously. Like, I would, like, move next to them. I'd be like, so far away from them. And then I'd move into, like, their same city. And then we'd literally break up like a week later or we were broken up and I moved after whatever the reason is. And like, it was just always a curse. I was like, never move next to a guy. But, like, if I want to have moved to those certain areas, I wouldn't have met the next person or even Moses, because he was, like, in the area that I was, like, living in. He was just in the area. He didn't live there, but he was, like, on, I guess wasn't the app, I don't know. But he just knew I was in the area, I guess, because he DM'd me. And he's like, oh, oh, it was my mom. He was in my mom's area. That's where it was. Because him and my mom lived in the same area. And he recognized something in the back and. And he was like, oh, like, we should go to this restaurant. I was like, in the back of my mom's house. So anyways, the whole point of that is, like, wherever you are is where you're meant to be. You know what I mean? That's where you're meant to be.

[Trisha Paytas]

I always look at people's lives. Like, I just recently I had a friend of mine, like, really find their life partner, and we have this conversation about how we were talking about all of this person's exes, and I, even with myself, I look at it as, like, a staircase. Like, each person is a stare. And eventually you get to the top of that staircase, and that is where your partner that you are meant to marry is. And you could have never gotten to your partner without each of those steps. You know what I mean? Without each of those. The person that you were on each of those stairs on that staircase and the person that you became after it. And there is so much life after this breakup. Let that man go swipe through Tinder. Let that man miss you. Let that man be so sad three years from now because he lost out on the wifey to try to go live the party life. And that's not your journey.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know what? I did, actually. Mose and I were never officially together, but when he stopped talking to me the first summer we met, because I was being wild, but we were never officially dating. We were, like, hooking up, whatever. But then he just, like, start. He, like, blocked me for, like, a month and a half or whatever, and I couldn't get in touch with him. Found him on Tinder, and I swiped right, and we matched, and I was like, here I am. Because he had probably swiped on me maybe before. I don't know how it happened, but he had swiped on me before or maybe during this process. So then he blocked me everywhere, but not on Tinder. So I was able to, like, message him on there. And Be like, I'm here. And you know what he called me? He actually said it was kind of impressive that I found him on there. He's like, how did you find me? I was like, I was. Because I was swiping thousands of people on Tinder, and it just so iconic. Yeah. And he was, like, kind of impressed that you found me on here. So I was like, that was kind of open to. Not to say that is your shows.

[Trisha Paytas]

What. What's meant to be like, will be. You know what I mean? That just, like, that person was meant to be your path. And you know what? Five years down the line, you guys could both grow. And if that's your person, and it will be. You know what I mean? And it's meant to be. But find peace in this breakup right now and, like, go dive into that hobby that you always wanted to or go do that thing with your friends that you didn't do because you were taken or go on a trip. Just reset your mind and focus on you. Because that's what the universe is trying to hand you right now. Right. Is the time of your life to focus on you, and we'll see what comes. So.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And so many things will come that you never even imagined.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. It'll all work out.

[Trisha Paytas]

She sounds super young, so it's like. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And she sounded optimistic at the end. She's like, all right, bye. Like, I'm all right.

[Trisha Paytas]

Priority.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And sometimes you need to just cry for a week, but then be like, this was not my lifelong journey.

[Tana Mongeau]

No.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, and you don't want that, too, because imagine you marry that guy who then always wants that and wants the younger girls and wants to swipe on the apps and needs the validation of going out alone with his friends. And it's not, like, just to party and have fun with his friends. He's, like, in the club for the girls and, like, whatever. Like, you. You might have dodged the bullet of a century.

[Tana Mongeau]

What was it? I think it was Mike Malek's tweet, who was, like, talking about being in the club and his bros checking in on him. And I'm like, and I'm not age shaming because we're close to the same age, but I'm like, oh, my God. But, like, 40. Talking about going to the club is crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, you know what I mean? Mike is gonna be in the club in Ibiza in his wheelchair, and you know what? Hell, yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

I mean, yeah, good for him, I guess. But I just was like, if you want to do that. Great. I don't know if I would tweet about being love.

[Trisha Paytas]

Does he.

[Tana Mongeau]

I feel like he had. I don't know him, but he had it with Lana and he just like let it go.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's. But they were. They were a movie. They were Mr.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay. Wait, really? They were so sweet. I usually watch the vlogs.

[Trisha Paytas]

She is like very sweet, just not a. I don't think that was their. Their match made in heaven.

[Tana Mongeau]

I used to actually weirdly watch his vlogs. Never. Now I could never. But like when Lana was in it, like I used to watch him all the time. Was glued with sat. And I really thought they were so sweet. But okay, maybe they.

[Trisha Paytas]

I mean they were. But I think they had a lot of. I mean I know that all the off camera tea, but like, oh, so your friends.

[Tana Mongeau]

Because it's very like Beauty and the Beast where like the girl's so in love with this guy that's like, you know, not below her, but like she's so out of his league. Right. She's like a hot start, like, or whatever. And he's kind of like, you know, lucky to have her. Wasn't he a fan? He's a.

[Trisha Paytas]

He's like an Adam Sandler type of like where he pulls the. The baddies.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. You know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

But I will say it's because of his personality. Like Mike is. I've been defending so many straight men on this show today.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's what I said earlier. You are a straight man defender.

[Trisha Paytas]

So many that I hate. You know what I mean? Like. Like it's diabolical. Who else is diabolical? Tom Sandoval was diabolical up until his recent era.

[Tana Mongeau]

Special Forces.

[Trisha Paytas]

Who else is just a diabolical straight man that I hate for people?

[Tana Mongeau]

I. I admire that.

[Trisha Paytas]

David. Joe Brick's diabolical. All of that whole squad is diabolical. Now I'm just coming for. There's so many where and just you hear about it all the time. Inexcusable straight man behavior. But like I got. I've spent some time with Mike and he can be very, very insightful and he's really there for his friends. He's like, he'll call me and just be like, how's your mental health? I'm checking in on you. Like, I thought I was struggling with OCD and like we had like a five hour phone call where he was. You know what I mean? Like talking me through symptoms of OCD and how he manages them and, and checked in on me for that. After that, you know, I have to give people their flowers.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think you just have good experiences because you're also, like, an influencer of something. Because, like, I remember him. Him treating Ava Louise, like, so awful after she came over and gave him a blowing. He called her, like, a troll and how ugly she was.

[Trisha Paytas]

And that was, like, in the long time. That's.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, she was, like, 20, and he was, like, literally 40. I was like, can you stop? Like, unacceptable. So I feel like you have a different experience not to, like.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, that's real.

[Tana Mongeau]

I follow him on Twitter, so it's not like I'm, like, a hater, but I do am, like, sometimes think these influencer men are mean to, like, girls that don't have the clout.

[Trisha Paytas]

Well, that's not the clout.

[Tana Mongeau]

He, like, accused her of being a cloud chaser. But you're the one who invited her up to your room. Okay? So don't even. It's not like she's snuck in and against your will started doing this. Like, you told her where you were at and invited her over.

[Trisha Paytas]

So, like, kind of Ava Louise, too. Like, I am so, like, proud of her and love her. Like, her honesty with all of her lore and how much she has grown as a person and. Yeah, that whole, like, I don't even know that whole scenario. And that's. That's. I just. I was somewhere else mentally, probably just being an insane person. No, but she just. No one deserves anything like that to happen, though. She didn't deserve a lot of the things that happened to her. So I also. I ride for her.

[Tana Mongeau]

Her. I know I want to have her on gestures because her mom, too, was, like, awful narcissist. Oh, my God. Like, abusive. And it's just crazy when I see people, like, make it out of those stories. And, like, I could see that when she would, like, troll with, like, looking in the toilet seats and stuff. Like, I could just see. I was like, I know. I know this girl. Like, was this girl not, like, obviously that extreme? Well, maybe I was. I don't know. Who knows? But, like, yeah, you are, like, looking for attention, looking for a way out, looking for a way to get your name out there to, like, escape the situation that you're in 100 and I had a lot of, like, empath for her. And. Yeah, but I did watch the. What was it called? The Night shift. I watched the Night shift. He used to make merch for it. He's like, get the night shift merch.

[Trisha Paytas]

I was like, in lock it no, just.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

I. The love life lore. I don't. I don't know what's got. What's gonna happen in Mike's love life, but I can't deny that he has been very nice to me. But that also might be because of my. Well, I don't know, though. Anytime I'm with him in public, I see him being really kind to people. So maybe that Ava Louise situation was. Was a faltering in character. I don't know the situation. And he was nice.

[Tana Mongeau]

But, yeah, team women, too.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, you know, I just. I. I want nothing but good things for the girls.

[Tana Mongeau]

Why did I even come about saying something? I don't know why I brought my.

[Trisha Paytas]

Makeup, him being in the club, which is just, you know, I. Even when I go out to the clubs now and I see all of the guys that I would see when I went out, like, every single night, I. There are some, like, so many LA promoters and just different. And I'm like, how. You know, but some people love that. And I love to gamble. I love things that aren't good for you, I guess. I don't know. I'm straight man defending today. I don't know. I love my.

[Tana Mongeau]

I honestly have empathy. I'm like, ridiculously hard on straight men. Especially, like, we talked about Harry Jazzy a couple episodes ago. It's like, I'm just like, no, but.

[Trisha Paytas]

No. And I think that your reasonings, like, even just what you just said about Eva Louise, like, that is not.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, you give me one ick and I hate you forever. I'm just like, I hate this person. But, like, it's like a forever ago.

[Trisha Paytas]

And you stand on business and you are like, like, yeah, I think that I just. I will develop personal relationships with people and they'll do good things for me. So I try to see the good in them. And I always just want the. That's the thing too. Like, I want to believe. Even, like with Makoa, like, I just want to believe that there are good people and men out there or just see the good in people. You know, just want, like, a good way to be. Like, I just, you know, even. Because I also think that I have a lot of empathy for people because I made a lot of friends. Horrible mistakes.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, I did a lot of. I said horrible things. I did horrible things. I was a horrible partner. Just as bad as so many of the men that we like on. Like, I was an alcoholic. I was just so many things. I was so awful. And like, I believe now That I have healed and grown, and I'm not that person any longer. So, like, I think it would be hypocritical of me to not, like, believe that other people can do the same things. I think Mike is in this era where he's like, I don't know. Last time I talked to him, he was like, I really want love. I want to figure this out. So I'm just.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm hopeful because, again, yeah, I guess, like.

[Trisha Paytas]

Or if he was like, I'm gonna be honest with all of the women that I date. And I do. I love Ibiza, and I'm gonna do this forever. As long as. As long as you're honest.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, it's not my. It's not. I could never date a man in that, like, scenario. But, like, lots of girls can and do.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I do love the honesty. Dave Portnoy was like, that. He was always, like. Like, he always says that. He's just, like, tells girls straight up because he loves those young girls, which is okay, one thing. But he says he doesn't want marriage or kids. Straight up. So I, like, I respect for not wasting time.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, honesty.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's true. I mean, I don't know what he says to the girls. Hopefully.

[Trisha Paytas]

He says that I could never be in the club for life. I, like, did way too much of that. But if you're honest and you're honest, that's. That's all we can really ask at some point.

[Tana Mongeau]

Don't you think, like, there are some people that. It's like, don't you want some companionship, like, a constant in your life? You know?

[Trisha Paytas]

I agree, and I do. Like, I like. Like, you know what I mean? I could never.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I try to, like, understand that there are people out there that are even. Like, there was this guy that we would talk about on Canceled. Well, it's not me to, like. I don't want to talk about her lore, but, like, Brooke had an experience with the guy, and we would call him Mr. Big because he was, like, the same as Sex and the City guy, where he's just, like, damn near 40. Like, and just, like, I don't know. The end takeaway was like, damn, you really want this life, Life forever? Like, you. Whether you're a sex addict or whether you're whatever.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, yeah, like.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it. I can't understand it. He was a piece, though, because he wasn't honest about it.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

That's a straight man. I hate, because it was like, you. You played someone you Played with someone's heart. You. You know what I mean? But still, there's a part of me that hopes he doesn't do that forever. You know, 40 is an age where.

[Tana Mongeau]

You need to start growing up a little bit as far as like the people you're dating to like, let's not date 20 year olds when you're in your 40s, you know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. And those guys who just like repeatedly do that. I always. Any, any guy that I know that does that, I'm gonna clown them for it because it's just like, especially when the older men, you just see them going through the breakups and they're so sad. It's like, what'd you expect?

[Tana Mongeau]

I know. It's like, yeah, you're a piece regardless. Because there's always like a little minute. I hate it. As someone who's only dated people in their 40s and 50s at every stage of my life, like, they're all awful because they'll say, oh, I was honest with her. But you weren't really. You were like doing other things.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, that's the thing. You have to be. You have to be honest. Honest. And if you are, then good on you for not being like the men, I guess, who are so dishonest, you know, because that's like, that's.

[Tana Mongeau]

Did you hear Leonardo DiCaprio is dating someone who is 26 years old and not 25, which is so funny growth.

[Trisha Paytas]

Because that, why is that like a leap in a bound for him?

[Tana Mongeau]

Which is he never did anyone over 25 and now he has a 26 year old girlfriend.

[Trisha Paytas]

Maybe he'll go to 27 next. 28.

[Tana Mongeau]

She's 27. That's time to break up.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, like, that's. I like, I wonder if he'll ever settle down. That's another one.

[Tana Mongeau]

He just said recently interview, he feels mentally 35 even though he's 50. I was like, all right, well, that sounds just like a code of creep. Says, like, mentally I feel this.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm like, well, yeah. And it's like, well, that's like such a thing in Hollywood. People became like, I wonder if the peak of his fame was 35.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, we looked it up. Yeah. So we looked up movies because the person, Paul Thomas Anderson, was interviewing him, it was a recent interview and he said, like, usually something happened in that age where you were like, where you peaked or you were traumatized or whatever, and you're like stuck in that. You were like frozen in that era. So we, like looked up the movies. I did Not. Oh, it was the one with Kate Winslet where he was like married and Revolutionary. Revolutionary Road was that year he was 35. So that maybe it was. Because isn't that movie like he's. He tries. He doesn't like his like suburban life or something like that.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's literally him playing like a 40 year old dad that. That is like grappling with the fact that he has a suburban, married. Whoa, that's so.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, that is crazy. And so that's the year that was 35. And so people were like, maybe that was. Who knows?

[Trisha Paytas]

That's so interesting. You see that so often in Hollywood, though. People who are like stuck at an age where either, yeah. Something traumatic happened or they peaked or whatever that is.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. So that would be.

[Trisha Paytas]

But I wonder, like, that makes me feel sad, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Because it's like I would literally be so sad if I like mentally peaked at like 21.

[Tana Mongeau]

For sure. And he specifically, Leonard Caprio was a child star. So I have a little empathy because like he was on Growing Pains and the guy who was on that show with him, that was like the vocal coach for everyone. It was the one who like abused Drake Bell.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's what I was just gonna say.

[Tana Mongeau]

Brian.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

What was his name? What's his name? Brian.

[Trisha Paytas]

His name was Brian. I don't remember his last name.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, and he was on Growing Pains with the Undercover. So it's like maybe.

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm not like speculating. Well, I guess I'm speculating, but I don't know. Is like. Yeah, like there's probably something as a child star, even if, like, nothing sexual happened. Like, like people being weird or creepy with him as a child time.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Brian was like creepy, I think to Leonardo, but also just like. Yeah, the child star of it all. The fact that people even like seeing Demi Lovato thrive so much right now is like so amazing. It's like the fact that people even come out of that is so crazy.

[Tana Mongeau]

People like Hillary Duff and she's just like kept it clean though. She was on Josh Peck and she was saying Chow. She like never like, like, did any drugs ever. I was like, yeah, but I. I do love Demi Lovato story because it's like, that's so real too. It's like just going through so much and coming out and like just.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Being amazing and.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. That's all you want for people.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Damn.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, I like your hat.

[Tana Mongeau]

Did you just put on that hat?

[Trisha Paytas]

It has like two wearable routes.

[Tana Mongeau]

What did you Wear earlier, actually, I.

[Trisha Paytas]

Had it flipped up, so I was wearing it. Oh, you're cute.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay. Okay. Feeling like I want to be cozy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Well, actually, no. My earrings hurt with the headphones.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, yeah. You look like you're going to go hunting. I like it.

[Trisha Paytas]

You look very cute. A duck hunter.

[Tana Mongeau]

Remember Dick Duck? Does anyone remember that? I'm too young. Oh, my God. Yeah. Dick duck. Yeah. Where you like? Yeah. And they had the, like, Nintendo gun thing. Like an orange. How did you know about that? I love you. My parents, like, had, like, a.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, a Sega and, like, oh, my.

[Tana Mongeau]

God, like, all those, like, old games.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm finding out a lot about you.

[Tana Mongeau]

We need Deborah on the pot. You should get Deborah. You guys should have. You and Deborah should have a podcast.

[Trisha Paytas]

We would love. She's just. She's.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love. I love, like. And I'm, like, the same age as your mom, so I'm not saying older in a bad way, but I love, like, older women's, like, takes. Like, I love. We always talk about them or I've always talked about them. They have had it women. I love them so much. I love their takes. They're so.

[Trisha Paytas]

She would last. I'm not even joking. Three episodes, though, before we're all canceled by association. She's excited because she just has. She has opposing take sometimes. And, like, that's what's fun about our relationship with her because we're like, what do you mean? Like, don't you see so many similarities with her, with, like, with Trish?

[Tana Mongeau]

I need to meet her. Yes.

[Trisha Paytas]

The sparkly stuff, like the cheetah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. It's so millennial. Like, there's a certain millennial that just, like, loves that stuff. And I feel like we get along here.

[Trisha Paytas]

She's like, I just want to work. I want to work in. And we're like, why?

[Tana Mongeau]

I love that. Leave the house.

[Caller 2]

Me.

[Tana Mongeau]

Me as buying so many purses, and never once have I left the house in, like, five years. And I just carry it around with me sometimes around the house. I almost brought one down. It has, like, a rainbow. I mean, we should have it as, like, a prop.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. That's my new bit, too. Just, like, trying to give my purses life. Even around the house.

[Tana Mongeau]

Girls would do that on my podcast, all the cool girls would come and, like, put their purses as, like, the prop next to them. You guys look so cool, and they just, like, dig through it. During the podcast, I was like, that's.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, that's a vibe.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

I love a purse.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love a purse. Too. I'll bring some down next time.

[Trisha Paytas]

My chateau is forever my favorite.

[Tana Mongeau]

Do you still use it?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's so funny.

[Trisha Paytas]

All the time. I was using it the other day. I love it.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, I love. I do love your purses. You always have cute purse. You just bought a new one. Didn't you like a Fendi or something?

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my Fendi Sequin baguette. That was the same day I bought Aquaman's Fendi Sequin.

[Tana Mongeau]

He loves his. I was gonna take a picture with it. I actually put it on him the other day.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, that's cute.

[Tana Mongeau]

He's just like, you know, cuz he likes the shiny things. So I was like, putting it around his eyes. He's like, oh, so cool. That's cute. Yeah, he loves it. Loves the Fendi. Thank you so much to Stitch Fix for sponsoring today's episode of Not Loveline. Shopping sounds fun. Does it?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. Shopping can be very, very stressful. And picking out an outfit for something can be so stressful.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my gosh. And they never have my size in store, so I'm going to the store. They don't have my size. I don't know how to piece it together because they don't put them on mannequins anymore. I'm like, how do I get my style?

[Trisha Paytas]

And that fitting room experience sometimes is truly purgatory. The girls like, can I get you anything else? And you're like, lobotomy everything.

[Tana Mongeau]

Anything. Okay, I want a real human styling. Are they stylists? No, they're nice people, but maybe they don't know how to like style. They're like, I'm just here for a job. You know what I mean? But Stitchmakers Fix is amazing. And let me tell you how it works. Take a quick style quiz. Share your size, style and budget, which is a huge thing. And get matched with a real human, the stylist who gets your vibe.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's no risk. All style. Get a personalized fix box straight to your front door and try it all on in the comfort of your home. Shipping and returns are always free and there's no subscription required. Plus, get a free try on for your first fix.

[Tana Mongeau]

So literally, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Get started [e-mail] not loveline to get 20 off your first order and they'll waive your styling fee. That's stitch fix.com, not loveline.

[Trisha Paytas]

Thank you, Stitch Fix for sponsoring today's episode of Not Loveline. And we can't wait to see you serve a look Love it.

[Caller 2]

Okay. And Trisha, I love you girls both so much and love the podcast. So I'm calling in to ask, is it acceptable to ask your fiance sister. So my future sister in law, we are getting married. She is gay. Is it rude to ask her to stand and be on the bridesmaid side and wear something that matches the bridesmaids? Because we did kind of let her know that that's what we wanted and we wanted her to kind of match and we're open to. She doesn't have to wear a dress because she doesn't really wear dresses. She hasn't in four years. However, she did in the past something to note that is important and she freaked out on us and started crying within like a minute or two. Hysterics. Couldn't really get a good. Like, we couldn't have a back and forth conversation with her. She's in her mid-30s, never talks about being gay, never really talks about how she presents herself or identity wise, if she is having an identity crisis. And like, we don't feel like we overstepped. We felt like we were opening the conversation to her, but she really took it the wrong way and was hysterical. And now we don't know what to do. We feel like we're aligned on the vision. We want, we would love for her to at least stand with the women. She doesn't need to wear heels and get her makeup done and wear a dress. We are flexible. But she is really coming at us and saying no, she doesn't want to wear anything. She wants to wear male clothes and everything.

[Caller 1]

You don't know what to do.

[Caller 2]

Love you.

[Trisha Paytas]

I feel like you're close. You're, you know, you're, you're almost there on like where I think you should be mentally, like, what's raising a flag to me is like the vision. You know what I mean? Like, and I'm trying to say this and like, because we love you and congratulations and all of those things. But I always think even if I get married, like I have so many gays who like, I will definitely be having on like my side. But if for some reason, like, you know what I mean? Like, if for some reason you like, let's say all my bridesmaids dresses were pink. Right? Right. And then Amari, you'd slay a pink suit and I know you'd be down to do that and stand you actually, yeah, you, you did for my Jake Paul era. But like, if for some reason you were like, I don't want to wear a pink Suit. I want to wear a black suit with the other boys and stand with the boys on moa side. Like, I. It just, like, no question to me. It's like, I. I. Would you want everyone to be comfortable? Like, I think gone is the time where it's like, all my bridesmaids have to wear the same thing. And even if they feel like, like, because then you. You're bringing that energy into your wedding and at your altar, and these are people that you love so much. I think that the phrasing should be more just like, we would love for you to be a part of the wedding party. Where would you like to stand and what would you like to wear? And how can we make that happen?

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, so she. Did she say she wants to be on her brother's side or. She said she doesn't want to wear the same color. I know she doesn't want to wear a dress or makeup or any of that, but she doesn't want even wear the same color. She wants to be on the bright. The groom side.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, I think there was a bit of an issue with the side or just something clearly, like, triggered something. And I don't. I don't know how you guys communicated that to her. Right. Like, there's a part of me that's like, maybe you did communicate it really well, and it's. It still just triggered something in her, and then she was unable to communicate. And that does suck because you're trying to execute this wedding and figure things out, and you want people to be happy. But I think that maybe the approach should be, we would love to have you in the wedding party where. What would you like to wear and where would you like to stand and kind of make that happen? Because. Because comfortability from the people you love is so important, you know? And even if it's. Even if what she wants isn't your exact vision, that's okay.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh. I would say smart may have a little opposing. I would say, like, it's your wedding. I love that you're like, you don't have to wear a dress. You have to wear makeup. Like, love that. But it's like, if your vision is, like, we had every guest wear white, right? And it's like, if you don't wear white, like, you can't be in the photos. You know what I mean? That's fair.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's fair.

[Tana Mongeau]

So she can come. Come wear whatever you want. People come without wearing white. But you're gonna be not a photo. You're gonna be asked to move. So we can't see you in the thing. You know what I mean? So I think it's like, I actually.

[Trisha Paytas]

I agree with that.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know, it's like, she can come or. I love what you said. Give an option. Like, do you want to be on his side and wear, like a tux? But you can't be like, if you want to wear like a purple and everyone else is wearing black, you know.

[Trisha Paytas]

I agree with that. That's. No, no, I just mean, like, if the bridesmaid's color is blue.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it's like, what do you want to wear? A blue suit, a blue dress, A blue whatever.

[Tana Mongeau]

Of course.

[Trisha Paytas]

Or is it like. Like you want to just. Whatever side. I agree. A theme. I think theme is. Okay. Follow the theme is. Is like, wear whatever and say that.

[Tana Mongeau]

I just want to stand there, but wearing nothing.

[Trisha Paytas]

They're in, like, sperries. And like. And yeah, like, no, no. A theme is beyond. Okay. And I understand that, like, that being a part of the vision is okay. But I think that if your vision for her hurts her feelings, like, maybe try to cater for sure.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Because you don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

But I love when people turn into, like, bridezillers or they're very strict on their wedding do's and don'ts. I. I'm on that side of TikTok, too. Like, absolutely no kids at the wedding. Then there's like a whole ton of comments. Like, that's so effed up. Like, kids are probably. I just love when people stand on what they don't want, you know, like, no, I'm paying $50,000 for this wedding.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, it's lit, liquor rolling around.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, I've seen first dances where, like, the kids just, like, run out in the middle during the first dance. And, like, the parents don't do anything. I'd be like, pissed. I'd be like, no, absolutely not.

[Trisha Paytas]

I agree with that. Actually, it is your wedding. I do want to, like, say, like, execute the wedding of your dream dreams, because you deserve that. But just. Yeah. I wouldn't want anyone in my wedding party to be standing up there and be like, I feel about this, or this is triggering me. Or like, what?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, she sounded a little triggered if it was so quick that she went into hysterics. You know what I mean? So she probably got maybe anxious or something about something you said. So it's. You know, we're talking about your family, so.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, just find that. Find the common ground where, like, the theme is executed. But, like, maybe this person you love is also comfortable, whether it's whatever side or whether it's whatever outfit on theme. Yeah, I. I agree with that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Good luck.

[Trisha Paytas]

Good. Yeah. It also sounds so stressful. Oh, my God. I don't know if you. But I need, like, a drink or something.

[Tana Mongeau]

But at the end of the day, it all works out, and the world keeps spitting whatever happens, whether she's in.

[Trisha Paytas]

It or not, you know, 100 and, like, just. Yes. I can't imagine, like, that's a. Everyone's like, oh, my God, when are you gonna get engaged? And I'm like, I. I can't imagine trying to have those conversations right now of, like, oh, you don't like this bridesmaid's dress, so now we have to find one in another color that's a different style. Like, I.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's so much would lose it. You hate that question when people ask you.

[Trisha Paytas]

I just like, oh, it's. It's just like the idea of planning your own wedding. Like, we could get a planner.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wouldn't you get a planner? Would you do your own?

[Trisha Paytas]

I would get a planner. But, like, it's still, like, you're so involved.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

You're answering so many questions, and you're figuring so many things out, and. And I think for me, it's like I'm in this era where I'm working so much that it would just. The way my mind works, it would feel like I'm working on another project.

[Tana Mongeau]

It is.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know what I mean? And I want to do it in a place of my life where I'm doing less so that I can dedicate my life to it. Not feeling like a work task.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, like, it feeling like, wow, this is magical. And I'm so excited to pick which color plate from the five options.

[Tana Mongeau]

That is a fun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's just.

[Tana Mongeau]

You would slay it stressful, though. You know, we have Halloween costumes to plan. We don't have time to plan a wedding.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's okay. And I can imagine, like, doing something like that. And then all of a sudden, it's like, I don't care what fork or if there's fish.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, that was me. I literally was like, don't care. Just whatever.

[Trisha Paytas]

But I want to do all the, like, niche, random things to, like. Yeah. Because it is so fun. And just try to still have fun. You know what I mean? You will work over this hurdle, and you guys will come to a conclusion where everyone feels comfortable. You, your husband, her, and. And you will have a great time. So Just remember this is a very special time. But I can't imagine. Seriously. I know you're stressed.

[Caller 2]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

So stressful.

[Tana Mongeau]

Try not to be as stressed. But that's weddings. Weddings just stress people out. So.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's just a fact of life.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's like. There is such a part of me that's like romanticizes like damn near eloping.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

That is wonderful money.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, so much money.

[Trisha Paytas]

Uhhuh.

[Tana Mongeau]

I recommend it to everyone. I didn't do it, But I recommend TechLink. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Or just like 10 people that you love.

[Tana Mongeau]

Love. That's what we did for Maui and it was wonderful.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Because then. And then you get to like focus. I was at something the other day that was like a serious life event for people and I was just watching them. It's almost like it's your birthday, you know, you have to talk to everyone, you have to take the photo with everyone. You have to. And that's awesome. But also like you're celebrating the love with your partner. Like you wanna, you know.

[Tana Mongeau]

Ours was a mean greet. Our wedding literally was. And I'm not just saying that. Like we literally were stopped at our table and people were just lined up coming through to take photos. And it's all our family and friends. But it really was. Was meet and greet for literally the whole wedding. We had an Elvis in person. You could see him, like he was performing. I missed it. Like, you know what I mean? Because you're just, you're just stuck there and.

[Trisha Paytas]

And you want to see everyone and thank them for coming and being a part of this journey with you guys. But it is such a like fine line, you know, where it's like you, you want to do that, but you also want to be present. Good God. I can't like imagine one day I.

[Tana Mongeau]

Would love to see what you end up doing for your wedding.

[Trisha Paytas]

I know, I'm excited.

[Tana Mongeau]

But also when you do get engaged, you have said people ask about engagement. Sometimes you. You can just be engaged for a long time too.

[Trisha Paytas]

Huh. Which sounds lit too.

[Tana Mongeau]

I always tell people that I'm like, like one person doesn't want to get married and one person like doesn't have the time to get married. I just get engaged. Cuz that's like the funness. Like I love to be engaged. Like just getting like the cute proposal pictures, ring, whatever. And then you're just like we're engaged. And then people stop asking, want to get engaged? Well, we are like we're getting married.

[Trisha Paytas]

True.

[Tana Mongeau]

Honestly. Yeah. And find out that'd be everything. I Know, I really thought it happened in Paris. I was like, oh, good for them.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, yeah. But see, at that time, I. I just, like, I was so tortured.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Because then you get engaged, and then, like, when's the wedding? And then you get married. Like, when's the baby? And then you have baby. When's the next baby? When's next baby? I was like, oh, my gosh, it's never ending.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes, it is. Like, so. And I just. I want to be in a place where it's like, all I have to, like, focus on and be like, wow, this really happened. And, you know, not just like, oh, I have a tart shoot tomorrow. I'm engaged now. Like, I just.

[Tana Mongeau]

Our wedding. I love that. Didn't. I think Michaela had an elf wedding? Didn't she have elf cosmetics but sponsor her wedding? She had a. She had a wedding lip combo, and elf cosmetics sponsored her wedding. And she had him at the wedding. And I loved it. I got invited to that wedding. I should have gone. That would have been so iconic had I known what I know about the icon that is Michaela Naguero. Yeah. I love her name. I don't know her name.

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't know. I've made so many jokes about her that she wants me dead, I think, and rightfully so. I just came, Kardashian. I had fun.

[Tana Mongeau]

You look like Millie Bobby Brown right now. Like, I literally am, like, you look so much like. Did you see here? She had a baby. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

I was just gonna say she just announced that her and her husband adopted a baby girl, which. Oh, my dream. I'm so happy for them.

[Tana Mongeau]

So exciting. And it's so. It's so posh. It's so in right now to just announce when your baby's here. Not the pregnancy announcement, nothing. People just announced, like, here's the baby. And I love that. I think that's everything.

[Trisha Paytas]

Cuz we really do just live in a society where privacy is power in so many ways these days. Because it's like, imagine she came out and was like, we're adopting.

[Tana Mongeau]

Right?

[Trisha Paytas]

And, like, everyone would have had so much to say, which is crazy, because you're, like, saving a life, you know, and it's just.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, it's the best.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, yeah. Or changing a life, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

But, yeah, when I heard that, I was like, okay, so I'm not gonna have any more babies, but I could adopt a baby.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my God, even think about that. I want to adopt so bad.

[Tana Mongeau]

I kind of do, too. Like, I always kind of have when I Thought I could have my own kids. And now I'm kind of like, even more motivated.

[Trisha Paytas]

I was like, I just think adoption is the most beautiful thing in the world. Because. Because it's like, I don't know, especially just with, like, how I grew up. Like, the world is overpopulated and there's so many children that would maybe suffer or be in foster care. Just situations. And it's like, why make more and add to the problem and the consumerism problem and, like, just all of it when, like, there's so many people to save and give a beautiful life? Like. And I just, like, I always feel that way too. Like, what is life without sharing it with those. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. So beautiful. She, like, inspired me. I was like, I love that so much.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. I'm so happy for her.

[Tana Mongeau]

Congrats.

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't know her, but I'm very happy.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm very parasocial with her, too. I love her. She's just an angel. Is that.

[Trisha Paytas]

She's 21. He's 23.

[Tana Mongeau]

21 and 23.

[Trisha Paytas]

21 and 23. I guess if you think about it, like, she had her 11 stranger things moment. He's. He's John Bon Jovi's son. Like, they say they've got the money that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Why did I think she was older than you?

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my.

[Tana Mongeau]

21.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Not that she looks it, but I really thought she's been around for, like, ever.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. She just started very young. Even Kylie Jenner had her first kid at, what, 21.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my God, 22. I love the young mom trying to me. I wish I was a young man, but. Yeah, that's so young.

[Trisha Paytas]

There's so many benefits to it in the regard of, like, being so young and limber for children. But Kylie was 19. Kylie was 19, which is like, now. And now she's what, 27, 28. And like, Stormy's like, literally about to be the president. Like, there's.

[Tana Mongeau]

But I could never.

[Trisha Paytas]

I. I mean, I could never. I just, like, wasn't grown enough.

[Tana Mongeau]

I. I could never now. I wanted to. Oh, my God. I wanted to so bad, but I'm.

[Trisha Paytas]

Just so anal about, like, wanting to be the best.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And like, having gotten all the therapy, read every book, like, everything, I think, because just I want to break every generational curse. You will just like, oh, my God. I couldn't imagine, like, 24 year old, 20, even me now. Truly. I thought by 27 I would have a kid.

[Tana Mongeau]

Really? Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And now I'm like, no.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like 27.

[Tana Mongeau]

Is young. When I think people in the toys, I really do think, like, yeah, 30s is the new 40s and 20s at the new 30s. You know what I mean? It's like very. Or 30s and your 20s.

[Trisha Paytas]

McCoy really sold me on that, though. Like, he wants to be an older parent and his dad was an older parent. And I guess I had older parents, but I saw all of the, like, negatives.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And Miko was the opposite where, like, he had an older dad, but, like, saw all the positives of that.

[Tana Mongeau]

What was the positives for?

[Trisha Paytas]

The wisdom and, like, just the. The, like, almost his dad living this very cool, long life and then kind of having him and like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I love that.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Tell that to Mel. Because we were older parents too, like Moses and me, and so I was like, we lived our life and. And truly, truly, truly. I do have no. I have zero fomo because I'm like, I don't want to be doing anything else. I love staying home and this is my excuse to stay home. And obviously we go out, but I'm like, just being a homebody is great.

[Trisha Paytas]

Well, you also, like, you have the great thing that you were so open minded to the younger generation and empathetic to the younger generation. And that was like, my biggest downside with my parents is that they were so stuck in. I mean, they were born in the 50s. Like, in 1953, my dad was born.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wow.

[Trisha Paytas]

So, yeah, like, he was very older than my parents.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Just like, so it was like he was stuck there.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

And that was such a negative for me. Like, had he been the type of person who was open minded to learning about the new generation and new things, it would have been great.

[Tana Mongeau]

Did they do, you know if you were planned or not? Like, were they trying.

[Trisha Paytas]

They. My mom actually lost six babies before me. I was the seventh try, which is crazy.

[Tana Mongeau]

Whoa. That's wild. So they really wanted. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Which I wrestled with a lot. I was like, what do you mean? Y' all tried this long and finally got it. And then just like, how did you not.

[Tana Mongeau]

Right, right.

[Trisha Paytas]

What do you mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

You just, like, everything was like, you're the glue. You're the child. You're.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, and like, oh, my. And like, work on yourself after all that time to be. So I definitely, like, you know, But I also feel a lot of empathy for her because all she wanted was a baby girl and then she couldn't do it, you know, like, which is very sad.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, it's.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's a lot. That's like, that is a lot of trauma to go through that.

[Trisha Paytas]

Sure. And I, like, I. I wrestle with it still. Obviously. Like, there's some nights where that keeps me up where I'm like, damn, that sucks. That's like, I was all you wanted and you couldn't do it, you know? But.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, well, like I said, you were the child. It's not like your fault or your thing to like, think about. It's more them. But it is.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Almost just empathy for them as individuals.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Not as my parents. I knew that they were bad parents. You know what I mean? Like, but just like, damn that. And that just sucks too, to see people, you know, like, you never get better.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like we were talking about the straight men and this. You're very empathetic for people who don't even necessarily deserve it sometimes.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's very true. It is true. I've gotten better though, at I used to be like two. That and even in my dating life. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Forgiving of everything.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. And like, so empathetic of like people who did not deserve it. Now I have definitely have boundaries to it, but I still am like that mentally. I have to like, fight that. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

I think it's a better way to be than just thinking like, everyone's awful and 100. Seeing everyone evil eyed everyone.

[Trisha Paytas]

But like, oh my God, I don't know. Accountability is also very important. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, of course.

[Trisha Paytas]

Number one thing, accountability over empathy. Sometimes, you know, for sure.

[Tana Mongeau]

Making sure people know. Two minutes or peace out.

[Trisha Paytas]

No. So I want to play you one more call. We do have to wrap. We're a little over. I really want to play this last. Last call. Devin has a good call to wrap up the episode. I'm excited. Yay.

[Tana Mongeau]

Me too. He's like, you have to play this.

[Trisha Paytas]

I've been enjoying the calls too, because they provoke, evoke. I don't know. Such different conversations than like. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh. That's why I love this show because it's like. Oh, it like, makes you think of other things. Yeah.

[Caller 2]

Hi, my name is Sophia and I don't necessarily have advice on sex, love, or dating, but I just wanted to say that I love you guys both so much and y' all are just so beautiful. And I could just watch Yalls videos forever. And I feel like I have seen Tana grow so much and I just think it's beautiful. And Trish, I feel like you are healing Tana's inner child. And same for you, Trish. I feel like tan is healing you in a sense. And I just want to say that you can really see it through y' all videos and the impact y' all make on each other. And I just love Yalls Dynamics makes so, so much. It reminds me of me and my friend. But I do have a question. Would y' all ever go on tour? Because if not Loveline went on tour, I would drop everything to see you guys. Like, I would freak out. I would drag my boyfriend. I would drag everyone. So y' all should really, really, really go on to where that would be epic. Love you guys.

[Trisha Paytas]

We love you too. What a beautiful person you are.

[Tana Mongeau]

That was beautiful.

[Trisha Paytas]

To take the time to call this number, to say that to two people, not knowing if they'll ever hear it. Just because that's who you are and because that's your heart. And I'm manifesting that Trisha and I get to hug the out of you one day.

[Tana Mongeau]

It'll happen.

[Trisha Paytas]

100 it will.

[Tana Mongeau]

Everyone at my tour always said, I love Tana. They would either they love you or they saw you already. They're like, oh, when can you canceled came here. We watched same. Everyone loves you. You had a meet and greet FaceTime. And everyone was like, just so excited. There was. There were like, five canceled shirts in the front row that being grabbed, like, okay, I have to. And I never would call be like, okay, like, be at my mean green. But they were.

[Trisha Paytas]

I remember that day. I was so excited. Trisha called me and FaceTimed me, and I was like, what's up, girl? And then it was so cute.

[Tana Mongeau]

They were same, though.

[Trisha Paytas]

Same. The amount of I heart drift shirts at my shows and stuff. And that's. That is just so beautiful how much, like, crossover we have and how lucky we are to get to do this. And, like, it's really cool, too, because it's almost like they brought us together to become friends. Like, if we really have to think about, like, who we thank for our friendship. Yeah, it's girls like her.

[Tana Mongeau]

Absolutely.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, which is like, that's so cool. And that's the only time in my life, I think, that that's ever happened to me too, where, like, almost like the. Our fandoms being so similar is, like, what got to bring us together.

[Tana Mongeau]

It was.

[Trisha Paytas]

I remember I've never had that thought.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. When I. When we started just church, like, you were the number one. And I thought. Thought, there's just no way we'll get Tana because, like, you're always in demand.

[Trisha Paytas]

But you were like, stop it.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was so gagged. You were so in demand, and everyone asked. And then I remember we were like, our third guest, and I remember just, like, a million views, and I was just like, oh, my gosh. I was like, wow, people love you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Same. Those are, like, those are people's favorite episodes of Canceled. Some of them are the. The Trisha iconic. I was looking at the one the other day of us in our warm uniforms.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I was also just watching that and thinking, like, I was so excited to have Trisha over, and we knew each other and we knew each other's lore, but we were nowhere near as close yet.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it's, like, beautiful to look back because that was very more influencery. Like, now it's just like, I do. Like, there's this peace and home and you and our dynamic that I find, and I'm just so grateful for it.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, and you're right. And it's like, Tiana's obviously, like, 10 years younger than me, but the. The healing of just, like, you know, a female friend who's just, like, so wonderful and so sweet and so nice and just, like. Yeah, like, just championing, like, me is, like, so wonderful and so nice. And I was like, oh. As like, a fellow influencer and an influencer that I once, like, looked at being, like, God, we were so opposite. I was like, oh, my God. But then ultimately, like, being the same and just being.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. We have so much in common. And we always talk about, like, the fact that we were definitely meant to come together at this time in our lives.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, for sure.

[Trisha Paytas]

And, yeah, you heal so, so much in me. You know, I always tell you that, like, you, I really needed you in this era of my life. Just the way that you truly, truly welcome me for who I am and not some facade or not. There's never a moment where you make me feel insecure or doubting myself and. Or just anything. Like, you are so amazing, and it's because of them. And, like, I know. I feel so lucky.

[Tana Mongeau]

You are the most genuine person I've ever met. I mean, that's what I said it on the first episode of Just Trash, and I say it now, like, you are so genuine and so sweet and, yeah, our text. I know. I was just like, I love our text chains. I get excited when I get texts from you.

[Trisha Paytas]

I feel anyone.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm just very excited. I'm always just like, oh, wow.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, when I, like, see a TikTok. And I know you're gonna love it. And I said it to you. Like, I legitimately get excited. Like, just the stupid. I'm so lucky to just have you and have this. And I can't stress that enough to the touring thing. What do we think? I mean, love it.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. I think we think variety show. I think we do talking. We do tap dancing, we do singing. We do all at.

[Trisha Paytas]

We would have so much fun. Like, so much fun. That's where it is. Like, just knowing that we would have. It'd be like just so silly goofy. Like, do whatever cosplay. I was just telling her yesterday. I was like, I want to be King Tut again. Can we do that? Like, she's always down. Like, it just. That's. That's a message.

[Tana Mongeau]

You want to be King T. So funny.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like we just get to be silly together. We want to start. We were. We've been talking about this. We would definitely start with like a show or a cup, like one or two or something like that. And to see or manifesting Madison Square Garden in the forearm. But listen, we would be equally as happy to do the Beacon and the Fonda. You know what I mean? Like it. Like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Maybe the Greek.

[Tana Mongeau]

We're doing msg and MSG is how it is. We're doing MSG and the Farm.

[Trisha Paytas]

Because the not Loveline Live show would also just be so fun. And I also think, like, we've never done a meet and greet together. Oh, yeah. Like, that would be so fun.

[Tana Mongeau]

I feel like it would take. Take us so long. So long. There's been so many times where like, there's no downtime in between the mean, the green, the show. Because they take like literally two hours and sometimes they need you to get off the stage. So they move us to like the lobby. They're like, you can't be in the theater at this time and they move you over. So I feel like union rules and. Yeah, no, for especially like New York, they're very strict about it and they like fine you $10,000 if you're like a minute over and you're just like, okay, but we could build a set. We could call Drip Dome. If we're at the Madison Square Garden, we'll call Drip Dome to build us a set.

[Trisha Paytas]

And how do you. How fun. Like even I think we both did a lot of touring this year and we're not like, let's get on a bus next February. But to do even just a couple one off shows of not Loveline and just get to meet you guys together. And you know, it's. It's also like, we've yet to see the not Loveline audience all in a room. And that tangibility is so special. You know, just walking out on stage and see, like, think about all the people we'll meet that will be like, I called you and I was this call. And then we'll remember the call and like, like bond with them over that and get updates and like, oh my God, I. Like, I can't wait to do something. We want to do a telethon too.

[Tana Mongeau]

There's just so much that can happen that could be real. I feel that one is very easy, I think, to accomplish.

[Trisha Paytas]

And thank you guys just so much too for supporting this show. Because this very much was just like two blonde girls with an idea. You know what I mean, too? Like, we were just like, we want to do this. And like even like in the beginning we weren't getting ads and we were like, we're having conversations about like, like, even if this isn't profitable, we still want to do it. And like, whatever. And now like the ads are slowly coming in. But obviously that's all because of the people who listen and call and just the patrons too, like you guys that we have such a fun community over there. I just, I could go on for hours, but the gratitude is endless for bringing us together and making all of this happen.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh my God. I know. It's been so fun. We're almost at a year, huh? We almost have a year anniversary coming up. November. It's that crazy. Amazing. What I know. We have to celebrate. Maybe our thon will be at the year.

[Trisha Paytas]

We have the one year anniversary of not Loveline in November. Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

Isn't it crazy Fly posting every week while you're touring internationally. I'm having a Broadway.

[Trisha Paytas]

For her money.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, I know. Like, how did we. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh my God. I. And just like I feel like I've gone through so much and like we still. And like, you know what it is, you know what makes it feel like it's a little less, I think is because the stacking.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

We don't film it every week. So it's like, you know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

So we would. But when we do stack, we're like together like five days intensively. It's like so intense. Then we don't see each other for like a month. And it's like so crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

There was a point in time where I was genuinely debating putting an air mattress down here and just being like, I'm not like two days in A.

[Tana Mongeau]

Row, like, six episodes a day. Like so.

[Trisha Paytas]

But, like, also, I will say that attests to our love for each other and our show. Like, I think that a lot of people in the positions that we were in this year, there were so many roadblocks to like, be like, oh, my God, we. Our schedules and, like, there's literally no time to film this show and, like, births and tours and all the things. A lot of people would be like, you know what? We'll get them next year. But, like, we wanted this so badly that, like, we made it, or I.

[Tana Mongeau]

Think it we made missed two weeks in the year. And I think that was pretty.

[Trisha Paytas]

I think you were literally popping a baby.

[Tana Mongeau]

You were going to Australia. It's, like, impossible.

[Trisha Paytas]

But, like, that just shows how much you and I, like, love this and wanted it to happen. And that's, like, really cool too.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love it. I love it. So fun, so easy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Devin, that call, really, like, I'm really happy you played that call.

[Tana Mongeau]

So cute. We'll see you at Madison Square Garden.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I love you, Trisha Paytas.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love you, Tana Moo.

[Trisha Paytas]

So much.

[Tana Mongeau]

Your name's kind of. Is hard to say. Even I know you. It's like I was scared. I was like, I'm gonna mess it up. I'm gonna mess it up.

[Trisha Paytas]

I think I mess it up sometimes. And honestly, I'll be Tanape.

[Tana Mongeau]

Just. I do that with Moses's name, which is actually my last name too. I don't really know how to pronounce his name. It's like Hackman a Hawkmon. It's like, I don't know it. And it is also my name.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, wait till you find out Makoba's full name. It'll take you 10 years.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my God. Yeah. Do you know it? I mean, you don't say it, but you know it. You can say it. I don't know Moses are.

[Trisha Paytas]

Leah.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was like, I can't say it.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, it is so long.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my God. I gotta know off camera, right? We love you guys. Love you guys.

[Trisha Paytas]

See us talk about from that to that.