I HAVE CANCER AND HE WANTS TO BREAK UP??? | NOT LOVELINE Ep 12

Summary

Podcast Summary: Not Loveline Ep 12 – "I HAVE CANCER AND HE WANTS TO BREAK UP???"

Release Date: February 24, 2025
Hosts: Tana Mongeau and Trish Paytas
Episode Title: I HAVE CANCER AND HE WANTS TO BREAK UP??? | NOT LOVELINE Ep 12

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1. Introduction to the Episode

Tana Mongeau and Trish Paytas kick off the episode by expressing their enthusiasm for providing advice and delving into their listeners' personal dramas. They emphasize their preference for engaging with others' stories over discussing their own.

• Tana: "I'm ready to just hear about everyone's." [00:38]
• Trish: "That's why I love doing this podcast because sometimes it doesn't have to be about, like, drama or anything. It's just like, let's just hear about your drama." [00:56]

2. Discussion on Parenting and Public Figures

The hosts shift focus to discuss recent controversies involving public figures, specifically criticizing Ash Trevino for her alleged poor parenting practices.

• Tana: "Her kids don't have beds... they sleep on the floor." [03:22]
• Trish: "Anybody should and would report... it's like, sad." [03:33]

They express frustration over the lack of action taken against such behavior, highlighting the difficulty in identifying and addressing emotional and financial neglect.

• Tana: "They present as decently normal parents. And it's not. It doesn't teeter the lines of the law always." [20:01]

3. Analyzing Media Representations of Predatory Behavior

Tana and Trish delve into their thoughts on media portrayals of predators, comparing shows like "Catch a Predator" to more sensationalized formats like "Jerry Springer."

• Trish: "It ruins a child. Yeah. And it's dangerous and all that." [07:19]
• Tana: "The whole thing was obviously like kind of a corrupt operation." [06:54]

They discuss the societal impact of these shows and the complexities involved in understanding and rehabilitating predatory individuals.

4. Advice to Their 20-Year-Old Selves

A significant portion of the episode centers around the hosts reflecting on what advice they would give to their younger selves.

• Trish: "I wish I could like, tell my younger self... don't go on the street and like sell your body." [13:59]
• Tana: "I would just want to give my younger self the biggest hug and be like, you are doing your best with the cards you were dealt." [14:30]

They discuss themes of self-forgiveness, the importance of personal growth, and navigating traumatic past experiences. Tana shares her perspective on not altering past mistakes but instead cultivating self-compassion.

5. Listener Call-In: Cancer Diagnosis and Relationship Breakup

The pivotal moment of the episode features a listener who faced a harrowing situation involving a cancer diagnosis and a boyfriend contemplating breaking up.

• Caller: "Today is my 20th birthday... I found a text message... he was talking about taking a break with me... [30:48]"

Tana's Advice:

• Tana: "Dump him. I hate him. Post it on your story." [31:05]

Trish and Tana rally around the caller, discussing the implications of emotional manipulation evidenced by the boyfriend's use of skull emojis to signify his reluctance to end the relationship during her cancer scare.

• Trish: "I think it's sweet... now that you are cancer free. You could probably get rid of him now." [34:12]

They emphasize the importance of recognizing toxic behavior masked under seemingly compassionate statements, urging the caller to prioritize her well-being over the relationship.

6. Additional Listener Calls and Relationship Advice

The episode continues with more listener interactions, where callers seek advice on handling conflicts, dealing with ex-partners, and navigating toxic relationships.

Conflict with Boyfriend:

• Caller: "Every time there's a conflict... I just can't bite my tongue... I feel like I have to win." [41:09]

Advice:

• Tana: "Cool off. Time is very important. Set boundaries." [41:37]
• Trish: "Stay calm and pick your battles." [43:56]

Dealing with a Harassing Ex:

• Caller: "Would it be wrong for me to put up flyers all over my city with his number on it?" [46:47]

Advice:

• Tana: "Don't involve yourself in the cycle... Learn a new makeup look and move forward." [47:28]
• Trish: "Revenge just brings toxicity back to you." [48:08]

They collectively advise against retaliatory actions, highlighting the importance of breaking free from negative cycles to heal and grow.

7. Navigating Social Events: Focus on Coachella

In the latter part of the episode, Tana and Trish discuss their experiences and advice related to attending large social events like Coachella.

• Trish: "I've been to Coachella parties once and it was awful... I gotta go back home." [52:00]
• Tana: "Find a cute place to stay with your friends and embrace the experience." [54:12]

They share insights on balancing the excitement of the event with the logistical challenges, emphasizing personal enjoyment over external pressures or influencer culture.

8. Conclusion

Tana and Trish wrap up the episode by encouraging listeners to continue sharing their stories and seeking advice. They tease an extended episode available on their Patreon for more in-depth discussions.

• Trish: "Never stop calling. Call is here to ask us your questions." [62:22]
• Tana: "This was a really good one to end on... We love you." [62:14]

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Notable Quotes:

• Tana Mongeau at [31:05]: "Dump. His. His brother, his dad. I hate him. Post it on your story."
• Trish Paytas at [34:12]: "...now that you are cancer free. You could probably get rid of him now."
• Tana Mongeau at [41:37]: "Cool off. Time is very important. Set boundaries."
• Trish Paytas at [48:08]: "Revenge just brings toxicity back to you."

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Key Takeaways:

• Self-Compassion: Emphasizing the importance of forgiving oneself and giving grace to one's past.
• Recognizing Toxicity: Identifying manipulative behaviors in relationships and taking steps to prioritize personal well-being.
• Healthy Conflict Resolution: Encouraging cooling off periods and setting boundaries to handle conflicts constructively.
• Moving Forward: Advising against revenge and toxic cycles, advocating for personal growth and healing.
• Personal Experiences: Sharing authentic experiences to connect with listeners and provide relatable advice.

This episode of Not Loveline offers a blend of personal reflections, listener interactions, and candid discussions on navigating complex emotional landscapes, all while maintaining the hosts' signature humor and honesty.

Transcript

[Tana Mongeau]

Your younger years are about living and falling and learning. Dump. His. His brother, his dad. I hate him. I hate him. Have so much with his father. I'm so. Oh, my God. And post it. Post it on your story.

[Trisha Paytas]

What? Hey, guys. We're rolling with the homies today on Not Loveline. Not Loveline, the podcast where you guys call this number and us for your advice.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. Oh, my God. I'm so excited.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm so excited. I feel like today is the day we're gonna give the best advice.

[Tana Mongeau]

I agree. Sometimes we were just talking about this, but sometimes you're just having a day where you want to get your mind off of your own life and your own things and your own. And like, this is my favorite. Like, I love just delving into the girlies and other people's. Yes. I don't want to think about my own anything.

[Trisha Paytas]

Same same.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm ready to just hear about everyone's.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's why I love doing this podcast because sometimes it doesn't have to be about, like, drama or anything. It's just like, let's just hear about your drama.

[Tana Mongeau]

100. That's the best. Like, even just in, your friends are like, anyone hits you up with their own, like, their tea and you're like, thank God. Thank God.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

I just need the gossip. The drama. It really does feel like a big, like, Kiki.

[Trisha Paytas]

I get invested. I know when someone has, like, drama. I'm just like, so invested. I thank God.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's like, even these calls lately, it's like, I need some people to call back. We have that girl yesterday who was like, I'm. I'm lesing. I want to lez out. You know what I mean? At the sorority. And it's like, I want her to call back.

[Trisha Paytas]

That work out for her? Yeah. She's asking for, like, tips on how to start.

[Tana Mongeau]

I get so invested in these calls and like, always want someone to call.

[Trisha Paytas]

Us back always and give us a follow up.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. And Patreon call. We need. Need more. More little, crazy little calls.

[Trisha Paytas]

We love patreon. Patreon.com. not loveline. They really go hard over there. And yeah, we need. We need crazy ones. Blow our minds by calling the same number and I guess preface it by saying it's for a Patreon. I don't know. Preface by saying, this one's crazy.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. We had someone yesterday and we've never had this before. Call in and not want advice. They just told us about a hookup that they had had and like, some crazy that went Down. Someone was trying to get her to bite some things and do some things. And I was like, wait. I also love the lore drops.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, yeah. Same. Or when they're, like, talking, you know, I want to try this with one person or maybe multiple people. It's like, the craziest thing. I'm going to do this multiple times.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know. And it's so cool, too, because, like, sometimes we'll get somewhere. Like, the guy wants the girl to do something crazy. And I think it's so dope when the girl calls in and she's like, I want to pee on someone. We get, like, queen work.

[Trisha Paytas]

Love it. It's like a dog. Just lift the leg and go.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's so funny. Wow. I wonder if anyone with that fetish has ever done it.

[Trisha Paytas]

For sure I left a leg.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I'll say. I'll save my other thoughts on that for the Patreon.

[Trisha Paytas]

This is our YouTube, but we want to get right into it because we have been just. The last episode was. I think we trauma. I. Trauma dumped on you. And then I think the other one was just, like, us talking for, like, 20.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, we were. We were trauma dumping galore yesterday and yapping. Even right now, though, it's so funny because the way our relationship is, even right now, I want to be like, did you see Ash Trevino's new interview? And it's like, no, I know.

[Trisha Paytas]

I want to get into. I know before we sat down. Well, I wish I would have known that. And I was like. And I was like, did you see David Dobrik's underwear?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, let me look right now.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, literally, him for Hugo Boss is so funny. And the spray tan sent me. He's one of the girlies.

[Trisha Paytas]

But, like, he looked better in that one than the book. But, yeah, for sure. For the girlies.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Well, we don't.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. This will come out a few weeks, but you never know what could happen between now and then.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know. Oh, my God. But I need to update you on Ash Trevino.

[Trisha Paytas]

Okay. Should we do it now or do you.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, no, no. I'll save it because this will come out later. And like I said, I'm sure she'll actually be in federal prison.

[Trisha Paytas]

But you do give me the updates. On it.

[Tana Mongeau]

Her kids don't have beds. Okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

What does that mean? Where do they sleep?

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't know. Her kids, they sleep on the floor. And she's making, like, $12,000.

[Trisha Paytas]

She talks about it or what?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. And the kids came on the interview, too, and they were Saying that it's like actually, like, I mean, crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

How does, like, no one step up? I mean, I think that's like a basic thing. You're supposed to give your child a bed, right? Yeah. Like, it's like, sad. That makes me like, sad. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's the thing too is it's like people are just really bidding her and stuff, like making it a bit. And I'm like, the more that comes out, I'm like, you. You're just as bad as all these other awful parents on Tik Tok. And like, I hate no seeing an awful parent especially.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, well, obviously. Yeah. It's like something that like, triggers. But yeah, anybody should and would report.

[Tana Mongeau]

It, I would think, 100%. It's just like, how do you do that? What do you mean? You're raking in the Galaxy coin and buying like the ugliest bag Louis Vuitton has to offer and your child is quite literally sleeping on the floor.

[Trisha Paytas]

Wild. I know what that happens. Like that Ruby Frank, she was like, vlogging for years. Like, not giving your kids, like, school lunches and stuff. I'm like, how did no one report this?

[Tana Mongeau]

And it's so wild too, because I always think that when people like that are comfortable with sharing that caliber of their bad parenting online, what happens when the cameras go off and I hate your guts.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Like, quite literally, it ruins a child. Yeah. And it's dangerous and all that. That's like so sad.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's so sad. Yeah. I'm like, I can't even. People, like, have her on. Cancel them. Like. No, I want her on prison.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, you know.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. No, that actually is like, so extreme. That's like a whole other level of.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And the girl who was interviewing her, it was one of the Bop House girlies. And she actually did like, a really great job and, like, wasn't laughing along with her and was like, clearly pissed. And like, I think it was a really good interview. I was like, damn, okay. Like multi talented queen.

[Trisha Paytas]

But it should end in like a Chris Hansen type thing where, like, she like goes somewh. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Things ending in a Chris Hansen type of situation.

[Trisha Paytas]

There's like an interview, but then also police are in the garage.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. Why does that never happen?

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't know. It is crazy. People get, like, in trouble for way.

[Tana Mongeau]

Worse and bring back way less Chris Hanson people.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, he stopped. Devin is saying that there's a documentary coming out. You saw that? You saw that? Sundance. You were at Sundance. I watched the online screener Oh, I love that. So island screener about to catch a predator, but saying. But people are saying it's bad. Like, they're documenting. Like, this was bad because people unalive themselves, but the predators weren't alive in themselves, which in a way I don't think is bad.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's bad. But I could see there being some mal intent there. Like, I think all of those 2,000 shows, like, even there was a documentary on Netflix that I watched recently about Jerry Springer. Did you see that?

[Trisha Paytas]

No.

[Tana Mongeau]

You should watch that.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's wild. You watch that. Like, I haven't seen. I haven't hear anything about Jerry Springer in so long.

[Tana Mongeau]

Me either. But I just, like, obviously know all the lore. And there was a point in time where it was like a cultural phenomenon. It was doing numbers like Oprah, you know what I mean? And, like, was the craziest. Straight up people fist fighting on stage. Like, it was like borderline UFC for, like the day drunk moms, you know. And like, all this just came out about all the. That was happening on set.

[Trisha Paytas]

What were they saying?

[Tana Mongeau]

I mean, it was just like what the show consisted of making the producers do to get these people on. And obviously, like, I mean, it was. The entire premise also was just like all television really, like, there was no further therapy. They didn't care about the people at all. A woman ended up getting by a man who was like, ab on the show and they just aired it and obviously didn't do anything. And like, Jerry Springer, obviously, he, you know, just like every man in Hollywood, once they get famous, gets caught up doing all the glucking and. Oh, you know. Yeah, he, like, you should watch it. It was really interesting. There wasn't like one major insane takeaway. Like, it just the whole thing was obviously like kind of a corrupt operation, which I could imagine to Catch a Predator being as well, you know?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. I guess in that sense, it's more. A little bit more innocent. People who are just messed up. They're. They're, like taking advantage was like, predators are like, predators. They probably should get the worst. Right? Like, if you're trying to meet up with a child.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Devin]

Similar to both shows that I've learned now. Watching the Predator one is like, these are people that made one mistake in their life and it's now broadcasted for everyone to see. And, like, they don't think they can come back from that mistake.

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't think a predator can.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, a predator definitely should never. I think one is enough. Like, absolutely a child. I mean, that's different. Like, there's two grown adults and there's like. Like that's.

[Tana Mongeau]

Then you're just manipulating that. Yeah, that's like, yeah, people can come back and grow and it's like. And obviously, even in the situation of predators, you. You hope that they go get all the help in the world and, you know, never do anything like that again. But at the same time, like, if you're telling me a predator croaked, I'm not shedding.

[Trisha Paytas]

I literally don't care at all if it's like a child. You're hurting a child.

[Tana Mongeau]

100 level 100.

[Trisha Paytas]

Everything else is demon on earth.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, how do you do that?

[Trisha Paytas]

No, I think there's, like, no sympathy for that. That's why I, like, don't mind that so much. I kind of liked it because it's like, yeah, as they should. As they should.

[Devin]

I definitely didn't do it justice.

[Tana Mongeau]

You have to see it.

[Devin]

But, like, they try to human. Like this one specific guy, he sounded nice. Like, when you're hearing him talk, he sounded like a good person. He just had an issue, clearly.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. I mean, but then it's like, I think once those issues arise as an adult, as. Even as. As crazy as the issues are, and you don't want people to know, your adult duty is to go to therapy before you act on it. Same as issues with. You know what I mean? Like, if you. If you want to be a serial, your adult diligence is to go therapize yourself so you're not a serial killer. Same thing with the Predator. It's just like, nuts.

[Trisha Paytas]

A child, then you just, like, ruin it because something probably happened to them, and then they're gonna do it to another person.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Which is also just so sad, you know? Like, it is just like, a thing. And I mean, that's a whole conversation about how the mental health space for people like, that isn't as. Maybe as big and helpful as it could be and normalized as it could be. You know, I've been watching Dexter even, and this new season of Dexter is about him as a child and his dad kind of navigating like, oh, my son wants to be a. And I've been provoking all these thoughts in my mind, like, how crazy that would be if you had a kid and your kid was showing signs of that. It's got to be the. Obviously the most heartbreaking thing in the world.

[Trisha Paytas]

Well, I guess it's like Michael Myers. They send, like, an asylum kid, and they just, like, stay there, and he just like broke out later.

[Tana Mongeau]

You'd have to. It's. I was having this conversation with a bunch of my friends. Like, it's so interesting. Like, what would you do if that was your kid? You know, and people have different takes. Like, I would, I would send my kid away 100. But it would be the most heartbreaking thing ever, of course.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, I think for anyone, people wouldn't. Right. Like, what was it? What was his name? Brian. Remember Gabby Petito and Brian and the parents. Yeah, Brian Laundrie. Like they like basically hit him in the house. And like. And I was thinking about that too. When that was happening. I was just like, it's just.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. If my son a girl, you know, it's like I'm not, I'm not being complicit. I don't know. Obviously it's probably much more layered emotionally, you know, like in, in that moment being that parent. But like still, it's just, you know.

[Trisha Paytas]

I was like, I always as most years, like it's like something like that happen. I was like, do we like run together? Do we go to like. Where do we go? I don't know. It's just like such a weird.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's one thing if someone's someone in self defense or the person did something. It is like anecdote or situational. But yeah, if it's just some up. That's so wild. How did we get here?

[Trisha Paytas]

No, dude, I never get here. Only with you, I feel, because you love like the true crime of it all and stuff. And I'm just like, so not. Then I get scared and then like, oh my God, this is so scary.

[Tana Mongeau]

But even yesterday we like went on this whole deep dark tangent about our traumas. We just know that we're comfortable with each other over here. Honestly, I think that's what it is. That is.

[Trisha Paytas]

I know it gets like, really?

[Tana Mongeau]

I know. Like hello, rainbow sunshine.

[Trisha Paytas]

Not true crime.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes, at all.

[Trisha Paytas]

We give advice, but not about.

[Tana Mongeau]

Not about hiding crimes.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Jesus. Let's take a caller.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Caller]

Today is my 20th birthday and I want your opinion on if you could.

[Tana Mongeau]

She's edging me.

[Caller]

Give your 20 year old self advice.

[Trisha Paytas]

What would it be?

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, today's not getting much happier. If you could give your 20 year old self any advice, what would it be? Wow, y'all strapping.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's a tough one.

[Tana Mongeau]

Funny, we were kind of talking about that yesterday. Like I've been thinking about that a lot lately. Like, yeah, I wonder.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like advice is like, we know what's gonna happen, so be like don't worry, girl, just get through your 20s, it's gonna be fine. Or give her something that's gonna like change her 20s for her, like help her.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Have you seen that movie? It just came out. It's with Aubrey Plaza and I love Aubrey Plaza. It's called My Old. And you should watch it. You would love it. You would love it. But she, it's, it starts the premise of the film. It starts with this like 19, 20 year old girl and she takes mushrooms with her friends and all of her friends are kind of just tripping balls normally. And then her older self shows up and then they sit around this campfire and she's talking to her older self. You know, like they have the same tattoos and scars and whatever, but it's two different people and it, it's actually kind. The ending, it's, it's a sad movie. I don't want to like spoil it for you. The ending. Sad.

[Trisha Paytas]

But I love a spoiler. You can spoil it.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'll spoil it for you. But.

[Trisha Paytas]

And spoiler.

[Tana Mongeau]

Essentially she is telling her older self, Sorry everyone, I'm going to spoil it. But she's telling her older self to stay away from this guy that her. Or she's telling her younger self stay away from this guy, stay away from this guy. And she had just met the guy and then they start to kind of fight about it. She's like, but I like him. He makes me happy. I don't know what to do. You know what I mean? She's like, you have to stay away from this guy. And that's the whole movie. You're trying to figure out why. And the guy seems amazing and whatever. And towards the very end of the movie, the older self tells her he dies. And that's why. Oh my God, it makes me want to cry.

[Trisha Paytas]

The older self tells. Oh, he dies.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. Like is saying, like, I'm telling you to stay away from him because he ends up dying. Oh. And it's so. It just had me in this whole existential. I thought it was going to be a before bed movie and I'd go to sleep and I stayed up for like three hours thinking. Because I've had experiences like that in my life. Like, would I go back in time and tell myself that person dies? Like, would I. Do you know what I mean? Like, or. And the younger girl comes to the conclusion of like, I'm just gonna enjoy every single day with him.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

In case I lose him no matter what. Even though I know that I think.

[Trisha Paytas]

That'S the better, I think if I knew I had five years with Moses, I would. And. But he would like die after that. I would, I would take the five years of just being so happy. Otherwise, like, you don't even know that happiness. Like, I would go my whole life without knowing love. Even if it was like a year, I would take the year for sure. If you're like, hey, don't fall in love with him in the 90 years, like, I'd rather have that full year of like being happy.

[Tana Mongeau]

Right. I agree, I agree. And so that kind of provokes the thought of, if you went to see your younger self, would you stop her from making all of the mistakes that she made? You know, like, would you?

[Trisha Paytas]

I feel like that's different because being in love is like happy. So it's like, oh, be in love. You're gonna have sadness, but that's part of life. Yeah, but stop making mistakes. For sure I would. Oh, for sure I would. I wish I could like, tell my younger self, like, even my 30 year olds out. Don't do of. You know what I mean? Like 20 year olds up. Like, don't go on the street and like sell your body. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Like the butterfly, I guess. Yes, there are certain things, but even like the butterfly effect to me is so real, where it's like, what if you tell your younger self to not do that one thing and then like, because you didn't do it, you never met Moses.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, absolutely. I do think everything happens for a reason, for sure. But if we could like, make it better. That's what I was wondering. The question I'm like, do we tell them, like, advice from where we are now or advice on like, how to change the course of their life if there was no butterfly effect?

[Tana Mongeau]

I know, I know you know what I mean.

[Trisha Paytas]

But I agree everything like, leads you to where you're supposed to be.

[Tana Mongeau]

I agree. That's the thing is, I think, I think I've come to the conclusion that I wouldn't change much. Like your younger years are about living and falling and learning and stuff. I, I mean, I think it's like I would just want to give myself more grace. Like I would, I would almost literally want to give my younger self the biggest hug and be like, you are quite literally doing your best with the cards you were dealt, you know?

[Trisha Paytas]

Don't you think I feel like you had, I don't know, I didn't know you had 20. But if it seems like you had such a good head on your shoulders, like when I was watching danacon. It seemed like you did give yourself grace.

[Sponsor]

No.

[Trisha Paytas]

You think you were hard on yourself?

[Tana Mongeau]

I think I was so by myself, really. And I think I did make a lot of mistakes, but I wouldn't change them, you know, like.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

And even at that time when I would make mistakes, I would just beat myself up about it so much. Or even just all the people I thought I was in love with and.

[Trisha Paytas]

Well, that's a whole different story. Yeah, I'd be like, don't go. That person, that person, that person.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. But then I look and now I'm like, if I didn't experience every single one of those, I don't know if I'd be where I am now. And like, I don't know if I would. Loving yourself is so weird. Like I'm finally at a place in my life where I do love myself and I'm like proud of myself and like, whatever. So it makes me have so much grace for all of those things.

[Trisha Paytas]

But we were talking beforehand and like, I feel the same way you do is like all those horrible relationships are like gave us trauma in current relationships where we know we're like sounding crazy if we say that's true. So it's like I think normal people just don't have those thoughts. They don't jump to the conclusions. We jump to where that is true. It ruins a relationship basically. You know what I mean? So I think it's like, yeah, you can't change it. But I mean there relationships for sure, I'd be like, don't do it with this person. You know what I mean? Don't go.

[Tana Mongeau]

I, I do, I do get that. And I like battle with that. But then I'm also like, if I didn't make those mistakes then, would I just make them now?

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, I think there's a lot of like normal people that just play no, like I know their worth.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

Right.

[Tana Mongeau]

Let her cook. You're right about that. You are right about that. I don't know, I just, I think I'm like not, I want to say like a lost cause in the sense that I think I would have never, me personally at least been the normal. You know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

The upbringing. So that's the question then, like you to yourself, like with your parents, what would you tell that girl who's like, the parents are neglecting not taking you to the dentist, not like being there for you, like, what do you tell that girl?

[Tana Mongeau]

I was thinking about this the other night. Really, in Vegas I was staying up thinking about it for a long time because I saw that tick tock trend I was telling you. And it's crazy because I do think I would tell my younger self, like, eventually they're gonna be dead to you, and that's gonna be okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

So just like.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know what? Yeah. Like, eventually this will all work itself out in the way because I was just in so much pain for so long. You know what I mean? Like, so much pain trying to hold on to these people, trying to change these people, trying to make them love me, trying to. You know what I mean? Like, just do that. And like, oh, I feel so bad for that girl. And, like, she couldn't fathom the, like, you know what I mean? I think that. That me really thought they would be in my life forever, you know? And that was almost like a sad thought to me because I was like, a damn, is this what forever is? And, like, you know what I mean? I would. I would love to show that younger girl, like, how it is with Amari's family on the holidays and, you know.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, it's not forever.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And then choose your family.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And that eventually I would use all of that as such a driving factor to, like, be a good mom and build a beautiful family and that. You know what I mean? Like, I wouldn't, because theoretically, if I ended up just letting it break me down, I would have never broken the generational curse, you know, and then I would be just like them, which was always my worst fear.

[Trisha Paytas]

And then you're like the opposite. What?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Sponsor]

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[Trisha Paytas]

Those tickets, okay.

[Sponsor]

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[Trisha Paytas]

Okay?

[Sponsor]

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[Trisha Paytas]

Thank you, seatgeek. Is there anything done for kids now in situations like that where their parents are not. Not necessarily. Well, maybe, I don't know. But like, what do they do if a child is in that situation now?

[Tana Mongeau]

Nothing. And I think that that's why I am so passionate about. I don't speak up enough about it honestly, but about narcissistic, like, because there isn't. You know, my parents were slightly and very emotionally and very financially and all of the. It was just a mind though.

[Trisha Paytas]

Even like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, even Ava Louise lately has been making tick tocks about the narcissistic from her mother. And I'm like sitting there commenting on everyone reposting them because I'm like, like, I know so many people are in that situation and there isn't anything that you can do because they present as decently normal parents. And it's not. It doesn't teeter the lines of the law always. And it's crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

You can't run away.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, exactly. And like they. They want nothing more than to have that control over you into like when you turn 18. That's a narcissistic parents worst nightmare.

[Trisha Paytas]

Because why?

[Tana Mongeau]

Because they no longer can. Yeah. Control you. Like, and to them there, you're. You're not your own human being with your own feelings and thoughts. You're an extension of them and upon. You know what I mean? And like a chess piece in their game. So it's like. Yeah, it's. It. I don't know and I don't know if there will ever really be an answer to that. Because it's so. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

There's nothing that can be done about it.

[Sponsor]

Which is like.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, like the Astrovino thing, like you said, it's like. I mean, what. I mean, something should be done, but is it. Can, like, can you take the child away because they don't have a bed?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

I would think, because, like, when you want to adopt a child or foster a child, they, like, look for those things, you know, I think that more.

[Tana Mongeau]

Hits the line of, like, neglect. So it can. You know what I mean? But obviously she's clearly narcissistically abusing them as well. And it's like, at least now, I think, because I didn't really understand why my parents were the way that they were until I was much older. And at least now it's like, there is tick tock and there is. You know what I mean? Like, just things that like. Like, I think I would have known what was up, like, a lot sooner if I was in today's generation, which.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, social media. More people talking about it.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And like, even just learning about no Contact, it took me, like, so much digging on what people with parents like mine do.

[Sponsor]

Right.

[Tana Mongeau]

And unfortunately, that really is one of the only answers. And like, like, no contact Reddit quite literally saved my life.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, you're like a whole thread.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. Of people who literally just talked about that. Like, I haven't. I can't talk to my parents and I don't. And whatever. And like, you know, like.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, it's.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's. Yeah, I, like, I'm just happy that there's more information on it. I think it, you know.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, it's important. And I think, like, you have such a good, like, platform talk about it because you've, like, been through it. I think you don't. I never really know that aspect of you. Really. And, yeah, that's like, so.

[Tana Mongeau]

And I should just be talking about it more. And even, like, Brooke has a very similar situation and we talk about it.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Narcissistic personality disorder is one of the saddest to me, I think, because there's not a lot of cures for it. There's not a lot of the. The person is quite literally chemically incapable of taking accountability or feeling empathy for your situation, you know, which is like.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it's so hard to, like, probably diagnose because they're probably not going to a doctor to listen to them say that. They probably don't believe it.

[Tana Mongeau]

And, yeah, their brain is gonna say the doctor's crazy. And you know what I mean? I'm perfect and I'm whatever. And that it's sad for them as well because those people end up usually losing a lot of people they love and, you know, but it's wild out there. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

So advice to 20 year old. You wouldn't change a thing because you said butterfly effect.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I really would just like give that girl a big fat hug and say everything will work itself out and get better. You know what I mean? And just continue to stay on the past, but give yourself more grace.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's a good one. You know, I would tell my 20 year old self to stay out of work.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I'm not trying to dog the sex industry, but I. God, I just eat today's day. I have like demons. I wake up in like night sweats thinking about it. Like. Like what? You know, it's like a really weird. It's something I never like. Like I liked it at the time for years and I'm just like, damn, I really wish I wasn't out there. Not even like the digital footprint. It's even just like stuff I did when I was like 18 and just like, I don't know, it's just like a lot and I'm just like, damn, I wish I wasn't doing that. I think that like PTSD more than anything has come up.

[Tana Mongeau]

So you're, you're right though, on that. Like, even just like drugs, I would go back and be like, maybe do a little less drugs.

[Trisha Paytas]

Definitely.

[Tana Mongeau]

There are things that, yeah, you, you feel that way about. It makes me so sad that you feel that way though, because, like I truly, the woman that you are is so incredible in every facet. And like, I know everything happens for a reason. Isn't gonna cure the night sweats.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, right.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, you know what I mean? But like, I just hope you know that you today are perfect to me and so fabulous. So even if that was like a part that ended up bringing you here and making you who you are and stuff, like, you know, thanks.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, the drugs for sure. I'm scared of my children. I'm just like, I used to be kind of like chill about it, but I'm like now with like, Like, I like not do drugs. Dude, I'm scary these days.

[Tana Mongeau]

Couldn't agree more. I had this whole conversation with someone at the poker tournament about that, that like in the 80s, everyone was doing coke or taking pills or whatever. And like, yes, it was bad, but those drugs were those drugs, right? Like, they weren't like now in today's climate, it's like, like in the 80s, someone could take a bump and then never do it again. And it, it's kind of like, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, whatever. It's kind of like getting really hammered or doing. You know. But now it's like one bump can literally kill you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh my God. It's the scariest thing in the whole world. Sorry. That'd be. My biggest advice is don't drugs. It sounds so silly, but like, even like. Did you have DARE classes?

[Tana Mongeau]

Huh?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. And I remember they'd just say no. And I was like, okay, this is like so silly. But it's like, yeah, the seriousness.

[Tana Mongeau]

I didn't listen at all. I think I was leaving dare like ready to smoke for the first time. And it is just like, wow, this.

[Trisha Paytas]

Is a play out. I mean that's pretty.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. But even like, it's so funny because for so long I would die on the hill that I didn't think was a gateway drug.

[Trisha Paytas]

You think it is.

[Tana Mongeau]

And for some people, I don't think it is at all. Right.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

But for people like me, I think it introduced me to the world of being numb and leaving my headspace. You know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

So you're like, what else can I do to get this?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. And you know what I mean? And now I smoke. Don't do anything else. I'm like, I. I think you can have a healthy relationship with it. But when I look back to my younger years, eventually it was like, what's stronger than.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's so interesting because like my parents would always say that she was like, it's the gateway drug. And you're just like, okay, it's. You know what I mean? But yeah, but you're like, it was for me.

[Tana Mongeau]

So I guess it could happen with people like me. Right? You know what I mean? Like, I don't think that's for everybody, but I think it's like eventually I got to. And I think it's like I even ever smoked for the first time because everyone was doing it. So then that becomes normalized in every facet. Like the amount of years of my life I was on so much Xanax because everyone was doing it.

[Trisha Paytas]

And that one seems very safe because you're like, I get it from my doctor. Yeah, just fine. And.

[Tana Mongeau]

And then I look back and it's like I don't remember an entire year of my life.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, same. It's actually like, that's also scary. All of it.

[Tana Mongeau]

And just the actions on Xanax. Cuz like you wake up the next day, and you fucking are still feeling it.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my God. It just, like, doesn't get out of your system ever. I was on it for, like, a full year in, like, 2020, for sure.

[Tana Mongeau]

And it's one thing, like, even now, I'll take it occasionally or take it in very small doses to actually alleviate anxiety. But abusing that, like, it's like, oh, my God, girl. One last bar, please.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, I think I just, like, would take one, and it's like. So I don't even do, like, day quote. I just, like, don't want anything because I just know myself. I'd be so, like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Addicted to it.

[Tana Mongeau]

So I know I have such an addictive personality.

[Trisha Paytas]

Maybe that's why I have the night sweats, because I'm finally, like, not any, like, dayquilt. I used to love Love day. Cool. And I used to be, like, taking it all the time.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I haven't done it in, like, a few months, and I'm just like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm feeling everything.

[Tana Mongeau]

You're raw, dogging every emotion. That's the hardest.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's like, I've had periods of. Because now I smoke, and I'll take the occasional Xanax and stuff, But I've had periods of life where I truly was just feeling it stone cold and Jesus Christ. You realize how many demons you have.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's what I'm saying. When it comes to light, your grand is like, oh, my gosh. But, yeah, work through them. All right.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know. We are. We are, we are.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's a good advice. That's good advice. So everything's gonna work out. And don't do drugs.

[Tana Mongeau]

It'll. It'll be what you. You know what you want it to be.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, get a credit card. Oh, my God. That's actually so true, though, too. I'd be like, girl, stop buying.

[Trisha Paytas]

Get a credit card or don't get a credit card.

[Tana Mongeau]

Get a. Build your credit. Like, oh, my. I was so financially misled for a very long time. And luckily, I also always lived with fear that it would go away. So I worked very hard.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know what I mean? So it's not, like, detrimental, but, like, the financial. Like, no one taught me, you know.

[Trisha Paytas]

That was broke so many times. I made so much money, and I was.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

Broke. I was like, Monopoly. I was just, like, bankrupt. Go straight to jail. Do not collect 200. Like, that was me for, like, two years. Cycle.

[Tana Mongeau]

Do not pass. Go. Yeah. That is so. That's. I couldn't Agree more.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's like, but the credit card, I would. That's a good one. To build credit, we love. But I had, like, 10 credit cards at 18, and I had the worst credit. I had, like, 400 credit. Because I would take out the 500 credit cards and just, like, never pay them back. Like, well, whatever.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it's like, my credit was tanked.

[Tana Mongeau]

And you don't need a Dior raincoat. You know, you don't need Chanel less Chaps.

[Trisha Paytas]

You don't.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Oh, my God. You don't.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, you don't need them. You don't need them.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my. My God. You don't need to go to the Versace Mansion monthly like, that. You saw it like, oh, my.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, I'd like to go once.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's what I'm.

[Trisha Paytas]

You saw.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's like, oh, my. You don't live there. You're not Gianni Versace. Go home, back to work, diva. Okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Financially responsible is definitely.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. That one took me. It took me longer than it would take most. But again, cards I was dealt, you know? Me too. Oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm still learning. I'm, like, barely now just figuring out how to, like, okay. How we save money.

[Tana Mongeau]

Same. Same. Saving money is so lame.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's so hard. It's so hard.

[Tana Mongeau]

And it's like, I battle so hard with the, like, you have one life.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

And the, like, I could die tomorrow.

[Trisha Paytas]

Let's go to VIP Disney.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. Like, literally 100%. Yes. Like, a balance. Yeah. It has to be a balance. It's like, treat yourself and still hold that. You can die tomorrow. But also, like, you don't need the. With that Chanel, you could live to 90.

[Trisha Paytas]

So.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. Quite literally.

[Trisha Paytas]

And we'll be doing this at 90 because we're like, we gotta pay off the credit card.

[Tana Mongeau]

No. Well, I'm gonna be like, I need a bedazzled Louis Vuitton walker. Like, you know? And it's like, oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

Same, same, same.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh. Next question. Yeah.

[Caller]

Hi, Trisha. I love you guys so much. So recently, I got diagnosed with stomach cancer. And me and my boyfriend the day before, we had been talking about taking a break. So I had to go in to get some more testing done and just to confirm the diagnosis, good news. I am cancer free. It was a mistake. I'm probably suing. Anyway, I went on my boyfriend's phone, and I found a text message between him and his friend where he was talking about taking a break with me, whatever. And one of his messages said, I can't break up with her if she has cancer or I can't break up with someone who has cancer with skull emojis. So what do you think about that? I think that was completely disrespectful. I confronted him about it and he said that it was just a misunderstanding and he said it's true. I can't break up with someone who has cancer. So let me know what I should do because I just thought it was really disrespectful. Okay, love you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Bye.

[Trisha Paytas]

That was whirlwind.

[Tana Mongeau]

Trisha, cover your ears. Everyone in this room, cover your ears. Oh my God. Sorry.

[Trisha Paytas]

Wait, tell me the reaction.

[Tana Mongeau]

I have said this so many times on Not Loveline. I have said this so many times on not Loveline. Dump his. His brother, his dad. I hate him. I hate him. Have so much with his father. I'm so. Oh my God. And post it. Post it on your story.

[Trisha Paytas]

What? That is the craziest. Wait, what triggered it? What made it? What's. I, like, not that bad. I mean, I get it.

[Tana Mongeau]

The skull emojis is what triggered it. And I understand that an emoji can be to one of two things. Like, you know, an emoji can just be a fun, fun, silly. But obviously skull emoji means, you know, like, I'm dead. Haha. Funny. Like I'm joking with my boys. If I had or thought I had cancer and I found Makoa saying I can't break up with a girl who has cancer. Skull emoji. Skull emoji. Skull emoji with his boys. I'm not even gonna finish my sentence with what I would do. But he's not a good man, Savannah. Like, it's just. I just. I don't know.

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't know. I kind of think it's like kind of nice that he's like, I can't break up with her. She has cancer.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, but you have to take in the emojis as context. Like he's like laughing about it.

[Trisha Paytas]

I guess I look at it like my mom will send me like a clown emoji when she thinks something's funny, but it looks like she's calling me a clown. Like, she'll be like, you know, clown. I'm like, oh my God, that's like so rude. But then she's like, meaning it in like a cutesy, like, funny way.

[Tana Mongeau]

I get that with a mom, but not with. Not with a 20 year old man. Like, you know, like, you know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

No, but Moses will do sometimes, like, something serious, and he'll put, like, the water squirt emoji. But he just means, like, you know, I'm. I'm, like, showering you with praise. It's like what he says, but it's like, no, but that's like a squirt.

[Tana Mongeau]

Why are you saying it so cute?

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, if I'm really sad, he sends, like, a squirt one. As if, like, here, like, I'm. I'm here to shower you with, like, love. But it's like, that's something so serious. Like, I'm so sad. I'm so depressed. Whatever. And he's like, squirt. So I guess, like, also, don't that makes sense.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, I just.

[Devin]

It's like, don't stay with me if you feel bad for me.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And then there's also that even. But even just the context to the boys joking around, it's like, you can have that thought. That's. That's a thought. Some text should be a thought.

[Trisha Paytas]

And, like, I respected for not breaking up with her because she has cancer. I mean, that would be kind of hard.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, right? That's true. But I also. It's like, if your only thought is that you can't do it because, like, just the. The whole connotation of the emojis, it's like, I would want someone who wouldn't even think to say those words.

[Trisha Paytas]

Sure.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. You know, to like. Because it's like, you. Like, if you. And maybe I'm just a little more, like, on my serious and, like, hating men's side today. And, like. Whatever. No, but. No, that's. I'm so happy you're cancer free. And I think that God showed you that text for a reason, because now you know who you are with. And I already told you what I think you should do, girl. I think his homie should run a train on you. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Cancer. Why?

[Tana Mongeau]

Cancer free. Oh, my God. I'm cancer free. That would actually be me. And I. That's my truth.

[Trisha Paytas]

I love it. Okay, that's.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm sorry.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's sound advice. I think it's sweet. But now that you are cancer free. Yeah. You could probably get rid of him now. It's just like, you were skull emoji.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Because it's like, skull emoji's got it for you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. I think you're gonna dump me.

[Trisha Paytas]

I have cancer.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, that's true. And you'd want the person to stay with you and stuff, but, like, actually imagine if I came to You, Amari. And I was like, mccullough's laughing with his boys.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

But then now I'm thinking about our group chat.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, you and I to each other.

[Tana Mongeau]

Would so be like, you think someone with cancer? Like, but the skull emojis, I feel.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like I could see you doing it.

[Tana Mongeau]

Writing, like, say it over the phone.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, yeah, say it over the phone. It's gonna. But there was an actor, Stanley Tucci. Do you know him? He's like, in all the Devil Wears Prada, he's always, like, a gay guy in movies, but he's not gay. His wife had cancer, and he, like, of, like, 10 years or 15 years, and he, like, left her for Emily Blunt's sister and passed away. But it's like, she's like, I get it if you're having problems, but also, like, stick it out, you know what I mean? Until they're cancer free.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, that's. It's hard.

[Trisha Paytas]

I think it's worse that they leave you the. The text. The skulls. Yes, A lot.

[Tana Mongeau]

But you know what I. I do want to think about, though, for a second at the same time. Okay. Imagine you are with a guy and you get diagnosed with cancer, and you guys were about to take a break before your diagnosis. And now, obviously, that does provoke. God, this episode's dark, but provoke existential thoughts of what if I only have a short amount of time left? I don't necessarily know if I want to spend it with someone that I was already going to break up with.

[Trisha Paytas]

Right. Like, you initially thought to break up.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, of course. Having someone there for you is amazing, but, like, I almost would rather go see the world and maybe meet someone amazing to spend the time with and, like, rely on my people who really do love me and, like, I love back, you know?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, I see that. I think I'm so weak because I always think about that, too. With, like, cheating, right? Like, if, like, Moses cheating, I'm like, I would probably stay together while the kids are so young because, like, I need it. I need that support. So with the Kansai, probably the same way. I'm like, I need you to. To help me get up. You know what I mean? Like, But I love that idea more. I love just being, like, f you. I'm gonna just, like, live the rest of my life how I want you, but I'm so miserable alone. So it is. I'm like, you're. I'm probably the hot take here. You're probably in the right. That people would agree with, because I agree with that too. But I just.

[Tana Mongeau]

I understand both sides, though, because it's also, like, all of those emotions that you're expressing right now are so valid and heavy. You know, it's like, going the other way also hurts so much. Like, you know.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. It'd be, like, one thing, I guess, if he's just, like, actively cheating and just like, okay, we're going out to cheat. Bye. I'll be back for the kids. I'll be like, okay, then at that point. But, yeah. Yeah, it's a tough. It's tough. And the cancer, I mean, I couldn't even. I can't.

[Tana Mongeau]

And being forgiving is also important. And, like, I understand that too, but I don't. I. Me personally, though, even if I stayed with that man with the skull emojis, I would just be such a. Forgive me, Jimmy. A such every single day.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, just rightfully so.

[Tana Mongeau]

Because I'd be like, oh, you think this is funny? Okay. Bet you need to, like, be with someone necessarily either. Like, you could, like, still, like, take your break. It's like, oh, maybe still really cares about her. It's like, okay, I want to be here for you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

About you a lot.

[Sponsor]

But, like, we don't need to be together.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm already with that too. Like, you know what I mean that. Because that's what I think I would do if, like, I was gonna break up with someone and then they had a really bad health diagnosis, but we were already gonna break up and, like, whatever. If there was a world where we didn't end up staying together because of it, I would still be a very great friend to them. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Because you care.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. 100. And, like, hopefully his true colors. I'm happy she's cancer free, but, like, had his true colors shown, maybe then they still. He could have been a great friend to her. But I think you deserve better. Diva.

[Trisha Paytas]

I think that was George Lopez's wife. I think he cheated on her. They got a divorce or something like that. And then he needed a kidney, and she, like, donated her kidney to him.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I think he, like, cheat on her, all this stuff. And he's like, I still give you a kidney.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And there are people. Yeah. There are even people that have done me really wrong, but, like, I was. Would still give a kidney. No.

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't know who I give a kidney to in my past. I don't think anybody.

[Tana Mongeau]

Anyone who I would give a kidney to from my past would just, like, directly started the kidney. Like, you know what I mean? Like, just, like, they would.

[Trisha Paytas]

They need another One. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like they would need like six more, so.

[Trisha Paytas]

I know.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

All right.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

That was a good one.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, I don't know. There are actually. Except whatever. Next question.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Sponsor]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Caller]

Hi, girls. I love you both so much. I wanted to know what you guys, what would you guys do? I feel like every time there's a conflict between my boyfriend and I, I'm always so quick to just like be immediately cutthroat and just like a complete raging. But he's the same way and like, that's not. I don't want to fight fire with fire, but sometimes I just can't bite my tongue and I just can't shut up. Like, I feel like I have to win, but he also feels like he always needs to win. So what would your best advice be on that? Thank you guys and I love you both so much.

[Trisha Paytas]

We kind of talked about this a little bit before. I mean, not like to that extreme, but kind of.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

I think just like, the guy needs to just shut up and just like, stop.

[Tana Mongeau]

Trisha and I were literally talking about that. Literally. Like, sometimes it's like you just want the guy to be like, you're right, babe. Right.

[Trisha Paytas]

Just let it. Just end it, Just let it die.

[Tana Mongeau]

But I have dated a lot of people. I honestly, I actually would venture to say that until Makoa, every single person I ever dated was like this. And I'm like this. And so I would almost date people who are more like me. You know what I mean? And we would conflict it out and I, I almost, I had to realize my triggers. I had to realize patience as well. And like being just more empathy, being more forgiving, trying to understand how the other person feels. But it is hard when it. You get to that point where you both think you're right and you talk it out. You know what? Honestly, my advice is if he's a good guy and you still want to stay with him, like, cool off. Time is very important. And setting that boundary, like, hey, if we're both going to do this, let's take a couple hours and come back with our logical points and come back with how we feel. Like, it's not like we have to let it go. But I think a lot of times if you immediately go into it in the heat of the moment, a lot of ends up being said that you, like, don't need to say, yeah, absolutely.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I feel like even when I cool down, I like, one, you can communicate better, which is like so much better. And also two is like sometimes you think like, okay, it's not that important. I can let it go. Or it's like, no, I have to make it. But both Things happen. Like, I would say I'm in the wrong 90 of the time, but there are the times, the 10% I am. And like, Moses will come around, which, like, he doesn't always because he. At first he can be pretty. When we, like, butt heads, he can be pretty. But then it takes like a couple days and like, I can see, I can see his point. I can see what, you know. So, yeah, the heat of the moment. Never. Nothing ever gets solved.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I couldn't agree more. I feel the exact same way with Makoa. Like, yeah, like, we're both kind of debaters, not necessarily arguers, but like, we'll both want to say our points.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. I always just think for any situation with any relationship, I had to like, really learn that cool down time. Even just with everything, co workers, friends, like, oh my God, it's so important because the worst feeling is walking away from something and thinking, like I said, a bunch of. I don't stand on.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh my God, that was me like my entire life. Like, all those videos I made were just like key to the moment. And it's got a. Like, once I sleep on something, I'm like, I always regretted it immediately. Like, any videos, anything, like, even if they deserved it, even whatever, it's still like, damn, I wish I could have just like chilled for a second because I had a really. Yeah. So it takes time. And you, I don't know how old you are, but I know in your 20s it's like, hard to do.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. I think that it was 24 or 25 frontal lobe for me where I really realized that that's even something that I would want to tell my younger self. It's like diva.

[Trisha Paytas]

Cool off, cool off. Take a breath. I mean, I was up to like my 30s, arguing with like, people and just like fighting all the time. And it was like, yeah, like, no control. It's just like a lot of things people have to deal with. But yeah, just stay calm and then pick your battles too. I mean, we were just talking about before, like Moses had a fight over, like, if butter noodles are healthier than non butter noodles. And he's just like, they're kind of the same thing. Because I was like, oh, I had noodles without butter. It's healthier. He's like, it's the same thing as if you ordered. But I'm like, no, it isn't. There's like more calories obviously in butter. And we like really went head to head on this for like, this is a couple months ago. We talked about my gestures, but it was just like one of those things and we were like arguing and I got like actually pissed. We were on a walk and we just like stood silent for the walk because I like so pissed. But also then they like, it doesn't matter.

[Tana Mongeau]

It being over butter noodles is so iconic. I will say it being over butter noodles is so iconic. But that's real as well. I was just telling you. Makoa and I like had one where like we were talking, like we were debating about the drive times from LA to Big Bear, LA to Mammoth and LA to Tom Tahoe and we did not agree on just road trips in general, like the amount of time. And in reality that's the dumbest thing. But then it's like you keep going back and forth.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

And then you almost. It's no longer about the thing. You know what I mean? It's, it's about like why are you arguing with me?

[Trisha Paytas]

Why? This is so stupid. Yeah, just like let it go.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes, yes. And just. And then you're pissed and then whatever. And it's like sometimes you just have to use that convo.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

And like. Yeah, just give it a sec.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, there's like certain things like that that matters then. Yeah. Like give yourself other things.

[Tana Mongeau]

Ye, that's. That really is my advice to you is I think you guys should have a conversation about cool off time and then bringing back those discussions because sometimes you got to stand on what you stand on. And same for him, you know.

[Caller]

But yeah, I have a really crazy ex boyfriend and he, when we broke up, first of all, he cheated on me. And when I broke up with him, he started calling me from textile numbers and like calling me from no caller IDs and blowing up my phone, harassing me. And I found out that he like did some really crazy stuff. So I unblocked him and kind of reprimanded him for it. And then he stole $90 out of my bank account. I don't know how he hacked my card, but anyway, my question is, would it be wrong for me to put up flyers all over my city with his number on it? I was thinking of doing like Peter Griffin laughing impression contest. Like $1,000. Like obviously I'm not giving anyone a thousand dollars, but I want people to blow up a song. So thanks. Love you guys.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Should I dox them everywhere?

[Tana Mongeau]

Right? I mean, first of all, diva, you can make a Craigslist ad for something for sale for cheap and like it's faster. You don't have to Put the. Yeah. Oh yeah. Like couch for sale super cheap. He'll get hella calls. You don't even have to leave the house. But something about putting the flyers everywhere is kind of camp.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's wild.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

As you would say, diabolical.

[Tana Mongeau]

Truly diabolical. Here's the thing. I guess, I don't know. It's like when you do toxic like that, you're still in the cycle sometimes. I do understand that. You just need to get your comeuppance, though. Like, you know what I mean? Comeuppance, like. Like revenge.

[Trisha Paytas]

Where'd that word come from?

[Tana Mongeau]

I have no idea.

[Trisha Paytas]

You just made up or you know it?

[Tana Mongeau]

No, it's a word.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's worth come mumpets. You're so smart. Oh my God, come muppets.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'm probably using it wrong. I love it, but like, sometimes I get it. Like, you want to feel like you got your lick back, right? Like, you know, but just know that if you're getting your lick back, you're still involving yourself in the cycle. Even unblocking him to reprimand him is just like some men never learn him. Stealing the 90 relatable. I've dated a lot of people who would or have done that.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Yeah, I agree. I think we have to this about this before we like the first episode, it's like. Does feel so good. Lord knows I was like, I'm making a video to destroy everyone's life. But it really just like brings that toxicity right back to you. It's like. It's like a karma boomerang effect where it's like, you put it out, it's coming right back to you.

[Tana Mongeau]

So, yeah, I think that like vibrating above it, being on that frequency will attract almost other people on that frequency too. And that's what you deserve.

[Trisha Paytas]

Are you reading the Power of Now? Did you. You start reading it?

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I haven't yet.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's so. That. That's so crazy. The frequencies and the vibrations is like. Wow.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Amazing. That's good.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

I need.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, that's why I was wondering if you started. Oh my God. That's so. That is so true. And like, yeah, if you're vibrating at a higher frequency, like, everything just like aligns that way. And like. Yeah, if you're like involved in the toxicity and the back and forth and everything, like, you're just stuck there. You're just stuck there. Even though you could be like the best person and you're trying, but it's just like, like. And I know it feels so good to, like, just, like, jab back. But yeah, it does. Like, the high road is so hard. I hate taking the high road. I hate it so much. Me too.

[Tana Mongeau]

I couldn't agree more. That's the thing is, it's like, I hate it. I've quite literally wrapped people's cars with my face. Like, I've done the most insane. I did that. Like, I've done the most insane on planet Earth. But the way you feel after is like, yes, it's funny, and you laugh with your girls and, like, whatever, but you're still on that plane and. And it's better to just, like, actually never talk to him again, you know?

[Trisha Paytas]

And you see, I feel like, again, like, I feel like I'm a good example of it publicly, where it's like, over time, people start seeing it, and then you're just like, okay. They're like, maybe they don't see it in the moment. You know, when I make videos about people and they're like, oh, my God, Trisha's so crazy. And, oh, my God, what's psycho? But then, like, later on, they're like, oh, my God, Trisha.

[Sponsor]

I kind of see.

[Trisha Paytas]

I kind of see her point.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, look at what happened.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. So I think, like, over time, truth comes out. He. He's exposed as an awful person. He gets what's coming in a way that you're not even involved.

[Tana Mongeau]

I always also say. And it's kind of a cruel sentiment, but I do always say it is. Sometimes people's lives are their own punishment. Like, he's gonna go on to continue to date people on his level, and he will get what's his. And your life is your own reward.

[Trisha Paytas]

And your hands are clean. Yeah. You're, like, not involved.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And, like, quite literally. Yeah, like, girl, that energy for the flyers, like, love it. I love it. But, like, learn a hot new makeup look and go out, you know, like, just, I. I believe in you. Me in 2025 says, no, I will. Me in 2021 would have said, hell, yes.

[Trisha Paytas]

Burn it to the ground. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know, so it comes with growth. And I get it. It's a life learning experience. Sometimes you got to do that. But I recommend not.

[Trisha Paytas]

Me too. It's better that way. One more. Let's do one more.

[Tana Mongeau]

These questions have been wild.

[Trisha Paytas]

You're at an office, like, taking meetings today. It's so cute with the coffee. I love, like, coffees when you just have, like, meetings and just. I agree.

[Tana Mongeau]

The coffee, the glasses, the little socks. I feel like my little Collar. I feel like a businesswoman.

[Trisha Paytas]

You give an Emma Chamberlain at Chamberlain Coffee right now.

[Tana Mongeau]

O. Okay. But it's giving Tana mojo at Starbucks, which is a big difference.

[Trisha Paytas]

What's the trashiest coffee chain, you think? Ooh, Duncan. Really?

[Tana Mongeau]

I feel like it's like, got to get my Duncan.

[Trisha Paytas]

I feel like that's kind of bouge, right? Charlie and Amelia. Sabrina, I think. I feel like it's Booz.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, they have had. It's gotten, like, bougie over the years, like back in the day.

[Trisha Paytas]

Trash.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I've always loved Duncan, but I get what you're saying. Like, oh, pizza's just bad. Pete did not know how to brew every time I've ever had pizza. At least it was bad. I don't know.

[Trisha Paytas]

So you don't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love coffee. Duncan's coffee, though, because I like cream and sugar.

[Trisha Paytas]

Duncan's. It's like crack. I, like, literally cannot drink in my heart. It's like, eat it, drink it. Yeah. It's crazy.

[Tana Mongeau]

Anyways, I get much unhealthier things at Dunkin too. Like at Starbucks, I'll get, like, a cold brew.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

At Duncan, I'm like, like, give me that milk. Give me that sugar.

[Trisha Paytas]

And the little aspartan are great. And they have little munchkins coming out for a spring in the buckets.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my God. In the wake up wrap.

[Trisha Paytas]

Okay. All right. All right, last question.

[Caller]

Hi, Tana and Trish. Love you guys the mostest. Tana, are you going to Coachella this year? And also, do you have any tips for first time goers? Thank you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Trisha, have you ever been to Coachella?

[Trisha Paytas]

I've been to Coachella parties once and it was awful. And I went for like an hour and I was like, I gotta go back home. Home by.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's so funny because, you know what I love about you is, like, the things you like, the things you like and the things you hate. Like, you stand on. You know what? I.

[Trisha Paytas]

Sounds like my worst nightmare. Like, just crowds and dust and people on drugs.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's like, quite literally is that. It's so funny how much I've changed. But even like the tart trip when I was trying to get you to go, you're like, diva. We can go on a trip. Like, like, are you just like, you know what you like? And I love that.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Because a lot of people are very, like, indifferent and. And, like, you know, I love that about you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, influencers in general. It's not like I hate them. I'm obviously an influencer. But it makes me cringe. And including myself, like, I just. Like, it's so cringy, but I'm also cringy. I will be the person ask most take a picture of me here. But just seeing it, I feel a little embarrassed for everyone, including myself if I do that.

[Tana Mongeau]

So I agree with all of that, actually. It's so funny.

[Trisha Paytas]

You should live your best life and be. Take pictures everywhere. I do love it. I agree.

[Tana Mongeau]

I agree with that. But like, an embarrassed, like, it's 15,000 steps. You're inhaling so much dust. 15,000 steps a day. Like, actually, like, the crowds are insane. The influencer scene at Coachella is truly diabolical. I talked about this a lot last year. Like, and I used to live for this. I'm saying it shamelessly. But, like, this past year and the year before, it's like, influencers go and they wear their outfit and they take their photos, and then they go spend the entire time at the VIP bar clout chasing. They don't even, like, experience Coachella.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, what is the experience? The best? The music.

[Tana Mongeau]

The music, the music. And vibing with strangers and laying in the grass all day and, like, that Ferris wheels and going to all the booths and trying the food and, like, actually experiencing.

[Trisha Paytas]

I've never seen.

[Tana Mongeau]

There's really good food. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. There's really good food. Like, people's priorities, especially influencers, can be kind of whack at Coachella. So I've definitely changed a lot about it. Like, this is the first year where it's like. It's so weird because Coachella is, like, a culture. Okay. Like, I don't know how to explain it that once you start going, it's hard to get out of that. Like, the way people pressure you into going, the way you, me, at least feel the need to go as an influencer, the. The relevancy. Like, I feel like I need to, like, go wear the outfits and, like, see the things and podcast about it. And people love the Coachella vlogs and whatever.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, you're missing out on.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. The FOMO of Coachella is almost. Almost more of a to do than actually Coachella. Like, because if I didn't go, I would have so much fomo. But then when you go. I went sober this year too. It was. It was a sobering experience to see it for what it is. Like, so now I think my advice is, like, do everything for you. Like, go see the music, see the people you want to see, trying to get your 15 friends to do the same thing doesn't work. Get your three be girlies and don't give a if you lose everyone else. And, like, take the mushrooms, girl. You know, wear the cool pants. Like, just, if you're gonna do it, really get your money's worth, too, because it's so. You know, I have so many friends that they do golf cart passes at Coachella.

[Trisha Paytas]

Okay, what's that?

[Tana Mongeau]

And it's like, you. You pay to have someone on a golf cart because it really is, like, 15, 20,000 steps minimum a day. Day, which is so skinny.

[Trisha Paytas]

I love that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, but, like, the way you feel like your foot's gonna fall off, you know? And then God forbid you wear the wrong pair of shoes. Last year at Coachella, I paid someone a thousand dollars to switch shoes with me on the spot. Like, no, I just had a bad sneaker that, like, blistered me up. But the golf cart passes that all these, like, celebrities and artists take and whatever are $15,000 a person. So, like, I. I have three friends who are doing that, and I'm like, y'all are spending $45,000 to get golf carted from set to set. Like, that is some. And it's crazy. The tiers of expensive. Like, why.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's why. You know, James Charles with a sugar bear hair pass? He's like, well, yeah, you need that gummy.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, it is, like, holy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Brand deals in exchange for something like that. I'm sure someone would.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, yeah, that's. I always. Brooke and I have this bit where it's like, if you see me promoting, like, an air fryer before Coachella, like, in April, mind your business. Like, you don't have to buy it. Just know a girl's got to do what a girl's got to do. I think this. That's the brand deal. It's so funny. Like, my standards get so much lower April 1st.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, I am just a little.

[Trisha Paytas]

Give me brand prime, give me lunch, leave all of it.

[Tana Mongeau]

That'd be top tier in comparison to some of the I've done. Oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

Where do you stay? And how do you, like, travel into Coachella? Like, what do you recommend there? Like, are you camping in the parking lot? Like, what are you doing?

[Tana Mongeau]

A lot of people love the camping, and they have the glamping you. I could see you loving that. Really?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, the glamping camping, because it's really bougie. And it's nice, too, to be on the property, because it's like, going to Coachella is like, an hour in traffic, minimum, to get there. Even though I'll book a house that's one mile away from the festival, and it will still take me an hour and a half to get. And then even the furthest you can go in a car, you're still walking miles to get into the festival. And like, all of that, it's like, I guess my advice is find a cute place to stay with all of your friends and just accept defeat in all of those ways, because the fun does kind of outweigh it.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

And, yeah, I always get a house with my friends, and I do it. I do it really bougie. It's very expensive. There are years I've spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on Coachella. Now I'm lucky because I've made a lot of bougier friends to split those costs with me. You know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, but for people who can't afford it, they're just. They're just camping.

[Tana Mongeau]

And you don't have to do the bougie. No, the camping's really expensive. Yeah. The cheapest way, probably cheap. Nothing is cheap. Even like a ga. Even if you did Coachella as cheap as possible, you're still gonna spend thousand, $2,000.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's like the Met Gala.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like 3,000. Yeah.

[Devin]

With like, food and.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, food outfits. Like, card even. Just like, it's crazy how much money people make too. Like, like, someone will buy a ass condo in Palm Springs and then make the whole year's mortgage on two weekends of Coachella.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Because it's like they can. It can quite literally be a one bedroom apartment apartment. And during Coachella weekend in Palm Springs, they're gonna charge you $2,000.

[Trisha Paytas]

Get a condo down there.

[Tana Mongeau]

I would. Honestly, I just. I want things other places, but eventually.

[Trisha Paytas]

I do love a Palm Springs. Like the Kardashians, like, where they have that. What is that place called? There's like a bougie place in Palm Springs. And it's like, so.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, they have. The Palm Springs is so bougie.

[Trisha Paytas]

It feels like old. And I like that, like, feel like old people minus Coachella weekend. But I like the old people.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know what it feels like to me is like Elvis Presley and his girl, like, and Priscilla. His girl. Hello.

[Trisha Paytas]

Well, he had other girls. I'm sure that's true.

[Tana Mongeau]

They had, like, the craziest retro vintage house. Yeah. Like all of. All of Palm Springs, to me, feels like that. Like you're transporting to a different time.

[Trisha Paytas]

It definitely is. I think that house is actually for sale. Right now. The one in Palm Springs that he had with Priscilla.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes, it is.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it's. I wanted so bad.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's insane. It's so beautiful.

[Trisha Paytas]

I would love to live in that house. Yeah, it is that vibe. It is like the 60s. Just don't worry, darling. I think was filmed down there and.

[Tana Mongeau]

It'S just like best movie ever.

[Trisha Paytas]

The vibes for sure. I like it anytime. Except for Coachella.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, right. I honestly, I completely understand. I feel like I was a little too hard cuz like I'm quite literally going this year and I do love Coachella. There. There are going back some of my favorite memories in my entire life. All the afterparties and the parties and stuff are at Coachella. And obviously you keep going back because the good outweighs all that. You just have to embrace, immerse yourself.

[Devin]

You know, say, as a non influencer, it's so different. My experience versus yours. Like, we're there for the music. In fact, so much so that we will stay away from main stage vip.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, all that.

[Devin]

The influencers stay at one stage. Meanwhile, we're going back and forth to eight different stages.

[Tana Mongeau]

And that's what you do. Like, Devin is 100% right. I had that. I was very caught up in the influencer scene of it all and like getting best dressed and like just all that bullshit networking and like making my vlog good and like it's about the music and it's so sick. Like Lana Del Rey. Last year at Coachella was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. I was sobbing the entire time. It was so amazing.

[Trisha Paytas]

And you're just like in the crowd with everybody.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. And like she just. People really. Any artist that's performing Coachella, it's such an honor that they give a show that they're never going to give again in their life or anywhere else. Like, and you get put on to so many new artists. Like last year I became a peso pluma super fan. I didn't even like, like, I didn't even think I like would would vibe with that. And I was like history. That felt like a. Almost like a ritual in a good way. I was like, oh my God. I. Yes, peso. Like it's, you know, like just. It is really cool.

[Devin]

Like the music, all your friends going to disguise.

[Tana Mongeau]

That is so true. I should disguise myself as more. But I think. Do you know what my problem with disguising yourself is? Is that you're then essentially saying like, it's like an ego thing. Like, it's like I think I'm Beyonce. But then obviously, I get it.

[Trisha Paytas]

I do recognize you. I mean, Coachella especially. I'm sure that's like, your.

[Tana Mongeau]

I have to bring big crush out Big Chris. He's my bodyguard, and he comes with me to Coachella because people are insane.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. No, there's certain places that you just, like, need. I feel like any other place, I'm fine. Disneyland. I'm like, I have, like, three security because it's like, that was my people, and I, like, love it. But also, like, with my kids, you're just always just like, yeah, yeah. But, like, yeah, it does. You do feel cheesy because we talk about this, like, imposter syndrome, too. It's like, it feels a little cheesy to be like, like, let me have security, because, like, who gives? You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, my friends at Coachella will sure to be like, tana, I love you, but I don't want to go on ga with you. Like, we're gonna start. It takes me an hour to get somewhere that it would take someone 20 minutes. But I love it. I love meeting all the girls and seeing their outfits. But, yeah, I guess maybe a little wig could be fun. But then it's like, see? Shut up.

[Trisha Paytas]

A lot of people get, like, recognized. Like, even, like, the influencers, like, just, like, random tick tockers, you know, they get like. It's just a world now where people just, like, recognize people, and it's.

[Sponsor]

It's.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's cool. I get excited when I recognize people. I like doing more, but, like, I. I love recognizing someone. If I see Britney Spears around town, I'm just like, yeah. And I, like, whisper and doing all that annoying.

[Tana Mongeau]

So fun, though. Being a fan is, like, the highlight of life. Like, I think I love it. People who. Yeah. On people for being a fan is so corny because it's, like, the most.

[Trisha Paytas]

Joyful because it's, like, so fun because it's like, you're all there to meet each other.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. And, like, just freak out. And, like, that's literally what life is about.

[Trisha Paytas]

I do mean greets all day long. Don't Osmond. When we go down. Yasmin, we'll do Donny Osman, meet and greet. I will stand in line and talk to him. And, like, that's cool. Cuz, like, that's where it's, like, set up for 100%.

[Tana Mongeau]

I couldn't agree more. Adam Sandler has a meet and greet tomorrow. I'm going.

[Trisha Paytas]

He does.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my. We'd be there.

[Trisha Paytas]

I would be there.

[Tana Mongeau]

Adam, please, just one.

[Trisha Paytas]

We'd love to have you on the podcast.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. Oh, we love you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, well, I hope that was good. That was a fun one to end on.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, that was a really good one to end on. This was a. It's so awesome. The range of questions that we get from you guys. Never stop calling. We love you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Never stop calling. Call is here to ask us your questions. Today we're about to go to our Patreon and do an extended episode where we answer your spicy, saucy, sexy questions. Go to patreon. Com. Notlovine. See you in the next episode.

[Tana Mongeau]

Skull emoji.