THE LIFE OF A FORMER CRAZY GIRL + MOMENTS WE WERE WRONG

Summary

Not Loveline — THE LIFE OF A FORMER CRAZY GIRL + MOMENTS WE WERE WRONG

Podcast: Not Loveline
Hosts: Tana Mongeau & Trisha Paytas
Date: October 27, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this vibrant, candid episode, Tana Mongeau and Trisha Paytas reflect on personal growth, friendships, finding positivity, and the journey from "crazy girl" eras to their current, more peaceful lives. The duo recount funny and heartwarming stories of public outings, celebrity encounters, embracing women-supporting-women energy, and the lessons learned about accountability and gratitude in relationships — both romantic and platonic. The episode wraps with meaningful advice to a listener struggling with a best friend’s betrayal.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. From "Crazy Girl" to Calm: Reflection on Growth

• Both hosts open up about their messier, drama-filled early twenties, recognizing they "were the reason their life was so crazy" (00:59, 42:25). Now, they focus on protecting their peace and manifesting positivity.
  • Tana: "I was doing exposed videos and drama and crying, and then the universe gave me more drama to cry over. You know what I mean?" (01:09, 42:51)
  • Trisha: "At the same time too. In my early 20s, I'd be doing all the crazy and I'd be like, why is my life so crazy? And it's like, you—you are why your life is so crazy." (00:59, 42:25)
• They acknowledge personal responsibility in patterns of chaos and emphasize accountability, self-work, and shifting mindsets.

2. Manifesting Luck & Positivity

• There's a recurring theme on the power of language, mindset, and "lucky girl syndrome"—the trend of affirming yourself as lucky to attract good things.
  • Tana: "You should think you’re so lucky... The lucky girl center one's like, I'm the luckiest girl in the world. Like, everything I want comes my way." (43:43)
  • Trisha: "It's so true... focus on the good. No matter how anecdotal the good is... more will come." (45:23)
• Simple joys—a kind makeup artist, kind strangers at the pumpkin patch and Chili’s, hyping up and being hyped by other women—are highlighted as sources of happiness.

3. Celebrity Encounters & Starstruck Moments

• The hosts share moments of bumping into celebrities at pumpkin patches (Ali Wong, Bill Hader, Nick Cannon).
  • Tana: “It doesn't matter what celebrity I see, I get, like, weirdly starstruck... I get so excited for some reason.” (02:47)
  • Trisha: "Nick Cannon's also a funny one... I met him, though, honestly. I just remember... we prayed together.” (04:21)
• Trisha recounts being a guest on Wild 'N Out and performing improv, highlighting supportive, sweet celebrity experiences (Nick Cannon, Timothy DeLaGhetto).

4. Women Supporting Women: A New Era

• Both hosts passionately praise the current energy of women hyping up women—whether at influencer events, on social media, or among their friends.
  • Trisha: “We are in such a women hyping up women era... Like, everyone was hyping me up. I'm hyping them up. Like, I was like, I love women. I'm gay. Like, this is everything.” (15:49)
  • Tana: "All women give us so much hype. It's... really a different time." (14:50)
• Influencer events and pop culture moments (Victoria's Secret fashion show) are discussed with admiration for mutual support.

5. Halloween, Costumes & The Joy of Shared Experiences

• Highlights include Trisha and Tana’s joint cheese-pull (mozzarella stick) costume for Chili’s, the fun of dressing up together, and the supportive, hype-filled energy around it.
  • Trisha: “Today was one of my favorite [costumes] I've ever done in my entire life.” (12:22)
  • Tana: “Chili’s had DM’d you and... everything just, like, aligned that day.” (13:07)
• They remark on memorable, happy days being made better by good company, fun activities, and spreading/receiving kindness.

6. Gratitude, Friendship, and Finding Chosen Family

• Reflecting on the importance of chosen family and gratitude, especially for those who felt alone during the holidays.
  • Trisha: "You can create your own things that feel like family and feel like love... your life can expand and grow with you." (27:10)
  • Tana: "You’re so lucky to have found, like, people that just, like, you love and that love you.” (27:30)
• Details about their friend circles, planning birthdays, and casual hangouts that bring warmth.

7. Personal Anecdotes: Relationship Growth & Accountability

• Both share vulnerable stories about fighting with partners (Moses and Makoa), being self-aware about their own “crazy” moments, and the continuous journey to being better girlfriends and partners.
  • Tana: “I got mad at him for not cooking the steak fast enough to get before sunset so I could eat outside...” (60:04)
  • Trisha: “I started being, like, kind of rude. I was like, just pick one.” (55:57)
• Communication, apologizing, compromise, and appreciation are all discussed as key relational skills.

8. Mental Health, Growth, & Setting Boundaries

• Honest talk about working on anger, letting go of defensiveness/gossip, and fostering healthy off-camera habits.
  • Tana: “You can grow and, like, really, like, help your mental health but... mental illness will always be there for me.” (62:48)
• The importance of boundaries in friendships and romantic relationships is recurrent.

9. Listener Call: Dealing with a Best Friend’s Hurtful Drunken Outburst

• [73:00] Listener asks if she should reach out to a best friend who got drunk, said “the worst things,” and hasn’t apologized after several days.
• Advice:
  • Trisha: “People should be held accountable for their actions no matter what... If I cared about them, eventually I’d be like, hey, we have to talk.” (75:49–78:13)
  • Tana and Trisha: Suggest evaluating if this is repeated behavior, the underlying issues, and weighing forgiveness versus boundaries. Life is long, new friends and better eras will come.
  • Trisha: “That is not what friendship is. Like, people do have to be held accountable for the things that they say to you and the way that they treat you. Friendship should feel like light and easy and lift you up for the 99%.” (75:49)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “[Protecting peace]... realizing that I can be my own worst enemy and the quality of my life when it comes to my mouth.”
  – Trisha Paytas (41:55)

• “If you find some joy, some happiness, it’s like, oh, you want more to be joyful. You want more to be thankful for. You want more good things to happen to you. Like, just keep talking about the good things.”
  – Tana Mongeau (43:03)

• “We are in such a women hyping up women era.”
  – Trisha Paytas (15:49)

• “Focus on the good. No matter how anecdotal the good is... that just—and more will come.”
  – Trisha Paytas (45:23)

• “Life is very long, and there are friendships that I had end that I thought would be the end of my life.”
  – Trisha Paytas (80:13)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Reflections on chaos and responsibility: 00:59–01:09, 42:25–43:18
• Manifesting luck/gratitude: 43:43–44:26
• Pumpkin patch stories & celeb encounters (Nick Cannon, Ali Wong): 02:47–04:35
• Wild ‘N Out & Nick Cannon experiences: 04:35–06:53
• Costume/Chili’s Adventure: 12:21–23:09
• Empowering women & event experiences: 14:50–15:49, 17:42–19:29
• Building chosen family: 27:10–28:43
• Relational self-awareness & apologies: 55:57–62:47
• Listener Call - Betrayal by Best Friend: 73:00–80:47

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Tone & Vibe

Genuine, fun, a bit chaotic but full of positivity, humor, accountability, and warmth. The conversation stayed open and self-aware, blending relatable real-life struggles with lots of laughter and optimism.

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Takeaways for Listeners

• Embrace self-accountability; the chaos you attract is often the chaos you create.
• Mindset matters—affirm you are lucky, focus on the good, and more good will come.
• Value and nurture friendships/relationships, but protect your peace with boundaries.
• Forgiveness is vital, but so is honest communication and holding people accountable.
• The best days are sometimes the simplest: be around good people, wear silly costumes, and have gratitude for small moments.

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For those who haven’t listened—this episode is a masterclass in messy-girl-refinement, real friendship, and learning how to move from drama to comfort, with laughs and memorable stories along the way.

Transcript

[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Trisha Paytas]

And like at the same time too. In my early 20s, I'd be doing all the crazy and I'd be like, why is my life so crazy? And it's like, you, you are why your life is so crazy.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's like same. I was doing exposed videos and drama and crying, and then the universe gave me more drama to cry over. You know what I mean? You want to cry? You want to keep crying? Okay, well, I'll give you more stuff to cry over. Hello. Oh my God. Be the best day ever.

[Trisha Paytas]

We are having. We are actually having, historically, one of my favorite days of life.

[Tana Mongeau]

This was. It's so crazy. I always say this, how people in good moods can put you in a good mood. Like, like just beaming, just beaming with happiness. Because everybody was so happy. Everyone we encountered was happy from start to finish. Like, it's amazing.

[Trisha Paytas]

It was so true. It was so many just like nice people. And it's so funny because I'm like, I've had the best day ever with you. But you guys, like, Trisha will really live a whole day before I wake up. Like this morning, you started at the pumpkin patch at the.

[Tana Mongeau]

Literally nine o' clock right when it opened. Yes.

[Trisha Paytas]

Which is so cute. And then like, you had a who day. You had a whole Nick Cannon moment.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. That's. This pumpkin patch is like really close to us. But like, everybody goes there. Like the Kardashians go there. Everyone goes there. And we just like, like, I'm going there. Do you do a pumpkin patch? Is like a pumpkin patch person?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. Like, it's a cute date.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's. It's so fun. I. We haven't. I don't think Nemo's ever been to a pumpkin patch. And, like, I never used to, like, care about him, but I was like, okay, this has, like, petting zoo, like, stuff for the kids and stuff like that. And because, like, we've just been, like, so busy, I, like, really, like, scheduled. I was like, we need to do, like, a family outing before Halloween comes because we always miss, like, fun stuff to do. And so, yeah, I was like, I knew I had to glam this morning. I got a makeup lesson this morning. So we, like, did half my face and got a makeup lesson because it's, like, going to New York. I'm gonna have to, like, do my own makeup.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm so proud of you. You are so capable. And it looks bomb today. I swear, my. She's always like, I can't do my makeup. And I'm like, you could learn in three minutes.

[Tana Mongeau]

I did learn. Yeah. It was, like, 30 minutes, which is, like, really great. I learned it really fast. I feel confident that. But then I was like, okay, we're doing that Loveline today. So I was like, okay, that's at, like, noon. And I was like, okay, we had nine to noon to go to the pumpkin patch. And, like, it was crazy. And, yeah, we saw, like, it's so weird. I think you talked. We never talked. Or did we talk about it? Maybe I talked about just Trish when we saw Ali Wong and Bill Hader and Nick Kroll. Oh, yeah. Like, it doesn't matter what celebrity I see. Like, I get, like, weirdly starstruck. And Bill Hader, arguably. I actually don't really care for him at all. Like, Ali Wong. I love the other person I didn't know Bill hater. I'm just like, I don't really, you know, But I still get excited to see people like, me too. I told my mom, oh, my God, Ally Wongabillator. Like, I get so excited for some reason.

[Trisha Paytas]

Freak out too.

[Tana Mongeau]

You're, like, pretty chill about it. You're.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's because I was stressed. Honestly, I was like, our flight's delayed. I don't give a. It was in this airport.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, you were stressed about it. But I love. And that was kind of day two, and arguably, I would say I like Nick Cannon. Like, I do. I know him from America's Got Talent. Like, I do like, Nick Cannon. I think he's like, I don't know, whatever. I think is cool. But yeah, we were standing in the. Between the food trucks, and it was like, 10, so also, like, no one's at the Food trucks. But we got French fries for the girls, and we got, like, smoothies and stuff. And it was like a really. And I saw him first with, like, one of his children, and I was like, I know what a Moses takes.

[Trisha Paytas]

One on every different day of October to the same pumpkin patch.

[Tana Mongeau]

He isn't there all day, and they have hours left. Like, they're like, okay, you come at this side. Which give him credit. I was actually, like, so gagged to see him. I was like, oh, I love this. And so I saw him with one of his children first, and, like, immediately, I do. What is, like, the most annoying thing when people do to me, like, oh, my God. It's not annoying, but that's, like, just say hi kind of thing. But I literally. Literally, I. That's why, like, I understand everything always.

[Trisha Paytas]

Nick Cannon's also a funny one because it's like, hey, yeah, what am I gonna be like? I met him, though, honestly, I just remember. Oh, you did?

[Tana Mongeau]

Where? Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Cause I did Wild and Out and then we prayed together.

[Tana Mongeau]

What?

[Trisha Paytas]

I prayed with Nick Cannon. I forgot about this until know. I was like, oh, I've never met, so.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, pausing the story for a minute. Okay, you did Wild and Out when? What were you? A cast member, a guest, a girl, like one of the hot girls? And you acted. You like improv?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. And it was the most horrifying day of my life. It was in my MTV era, so I was doing all the MTV things, and they were like, we're gonna get you a little Wild and Out. I flew to Atlanta, and they're just all really good, and it really is improv. Like, a lot of shows like that are very scripted, and it's kind of a lie. Like, you think? I was like, okay, so you guys are gonna give me my rap, right? And they like, no, you did the whole show.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, you were, like, one of the featured, like, people on the show. Like, they always have, like, a celebrity guest. And, like. And you did the whole show?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. And it was like, there's never clips of this.

[Tana Mongeau]

I never see anything. Oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

I hate that this is even, like, gonna remotely make you resurface. Oh, my God. I mean, like, skinny jeans and, like, Jordans. Like, I was.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, I love that. What an era. How old are you? Are you like, 18? You must have been so.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's like, 20, I think.

[Tana Mongeau]

Is this the one where, like, Timothy. Remember Timothy Delaghetto? I think he was different. I. Was he on there as, like, a cast member?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes, I saw him that day.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

And we did this whole, like, rap in the classroom. It was like something in the classroom. Like, everything had. And you wrapped. You freestyled they there. I think I said, like, a line. And then at the end, there was me and Justina Valentine, and they wanted us to, like, rap battle. And I think I wouldn't do it. And they wanted us to pretend to fist fight, and I wouldn't do it. I was like, this just gonna beat my. I didn't know her yet. She's very sweet. So, like, now I would be more.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, anybody would be mad. It was Jojo Siwa. I'm like. She'd be my. I'm such a wimp. Like, I, like, would never. What do you mean? No, never.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, my teeth are fake. My nose is fake. I'm not fake. Fist fighting Justina Valentine right now.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

So we, like, pretended to, like, les out. Like, I like, jumped in her arms and was like. Because I was crazy too.

[Tana Mongeau]

I need. I need to see this whole episode because I loved Wild N Out. Like, the original. Is this also the one with Matt Rife is the cast.

[Trisha Paytas]

I actually have been dying. You know what? Maybe it can resurface because I've been dying to know, was he there?

[Tana Mongeau]

He must have been, because I don't.

[Trisha Paytas]

Really remember all of it.

[Tana Mongeau]

I really remember he was not. Are you sure? Because he was in the reboot. Because this is obviously the reboot. Because it was like, on when I was little, but then they did, like, a reboot with all the influencers. Yeah, not all of them. Timothy, I guess, was the only one.

[Trisha Paytas]

But, like.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, it was all I remember now, like, when I really think about it, is praying with Nick.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, so what's that like before you go on?

[Trisha Paytas]

Or like, everyone held hands and it was like, so many people. Yes. And Nick Cannon led the prayer.

[Tana Mongeau]

Love, love that actually. I love that so much. I love a prayer before a show.

[Trisha Paytas]

And he was really sweet to me.

[Tana Mongeau]

He's very sweet.

[Trisha Paytas]

He was so nice. Like, it is like, we don't talk about just, like, celebrities who were so, so nice enough. Like, Nick Cannon was so nice, so welcoming. He did not have to be, like, all Tana Mongeau, you know, of course.

[Tana Mongeau]

If anything, like, a lot of people, like, look down on influencers. Like, oh, my God. Okay, we need her here for, like, the views or for whatever some people. I was like. But he. Yeah, that's. What year? Do you know what year that was roughly?

[Trisha Paytas]

20. 20. 2019.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, okay. That's kind of recent. Oh, my God. I Forgot how young you are. That's pretty recent. I met him in 2012 when I did America's Got Talent.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my God.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was like. Was like, 23 on the show.

[Trisha Paytas]

Was this the speed reading?

[Tana Mongeau]

This was the speed reading. And he was so nice. Like, there's. He's like. When I get off stage, he's like, ah. Like, he's like. You know, he's like. And even off camera, he was, like, very excited. And I was, like, nervous before. He's like, you're gonna be fine. Like, don't worry. Like, it's gonna be good. Like, everything's good. No matter.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's just a show.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, whatever. He was really, really sweet. And so I always remember Nick Cannon being super nice. And then I saw him and I did the thing again. I don't. It's so funny. Like, I really just don't. I'm not. Not a fan. I'm not, like, a huge fan, but I'm just like. We watch Messinger, though. I guess I could say that.

[Trisha Paytas]

But I was telling your partner, too. Like, I would koa over anyone and be like, oh, my God. That's like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I like turning. It's Nick Cannon. And they're like, all right there. Whatever. I don't know. Like. And of course. And also this specific place is like, you're always with your kids. Like, we had our kids. Our kids were, like, in a wagon. We're like, we have the kids. Like, and so it's like one of those things. You just, like, don't go up. Even people who came up to me at the pumpkin patch was so sweet. Like, I know you're with your kids. You're just awesome. I'm like, love you. Thank you. Like, it's great because it's hot. You're trying. Elvis is, like, running. Like, you're just trying to catch all the kids. Like, it's. It's a lot of the pumpkin patch. But we were just standing there in the wagon, and Moses went to go get, like, napkins or something. I'm waiting for the drinks. And then this, like, really pretty hot mom was, like, next to me, and I. I avoid pretty girls. I'm so intimidated. I avoid them so funny.

[Trisha Paytas]

You're the prettiest girl.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, no, no. This girl was, like, a model. Actually, like, a Halle Berry. Berry, like, haircut. Like, back in the day when it was like that. And, like, very few women can pull that off. But she just got, like, the best face, best body, and I was just.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, the bone structure.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And I was just like, I'm not gonna, like, look at this lady right now. And then she was complimenting. And then I get nervous around moms. I get nervous about anything because I'm just. I. I'm always just bumbling, fumbling, sweating, and like, whatever. So she complimented Malibu and Elvis's tutus. And she's like, oh, my God, I love tutus. And like, oh, are these sisters? And I was like, yeah. And then she goes, oh, I have a daughter. She loves tutus. I was like, how old is she? And then her and Malbor are the same age. And I was like, oh, my God. And then she, oh, she's here with her daycare. That's why we're here. And I was like, oh, my gosh, I love it. And we were just like, she go, oh, you're gonna have more kids. I was like, yeah, we have a third one at home. Like, you know, the three month old. And I was like, you'll have more kids. She's why I have twins and shows. And also their father has a lot of kids, so they have a lot of siblings. And I was like. And then of course, like, he is across the way maybe. She probably. I don't know, Whatever. I was like, oh, yeah, we know. Like, you know, because it's like, do you act like, like, oh, that's how many. Like, I don't know. It's like, yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

I was like, her father has a lot of kids, but she was like.

[Tana Mongeau]

So cool about it too. She was. You know, they have a lot of siblings, so, like, we're. They're good, basically. It's like. I was like, yeah, I love that. So she was really cool about it and we took it. She had all their names. She had three of her kids and she had all their names on, like in diamonds. Like, not like mine, but like three big thick diamond chains. It was so. It was everything.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know, Nick Cannon was swiping for that. Thank God that's your money. We always talk about, like, Nick Cannon having a million kids.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

But we never talk about the fact that the kids just have, like, a lot of siblings and a lot of money. Like, people make it seem like they're like, not like those kids are probably thriving.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, no, for sure.

[Trisha Paytas]

There was.

[Tana Mongeau]

We saw three there and yeah, they. They were dressed cute. They looked like they were having fun. Like, he took the older one and was, like, doing something. She was, like, getting food for all them and she was, like, carrying the stacks of food because there's like a little picnic Table and stuff. And I'm not, like, super funny. I'm sure this girl's also a model because she was, like, absolutely gorgeous. I'm sure she's, like, a model or actress or something, but she was, like, super, super sweet. And, yeah, it was one of those things, too. Was obviously, she was, like, famous, too. And I was like. I wanted to, like, swap numbers because, like, our girls are the same age. But I was like, you know what? Maybe I should find our Instagram.

[Trisha Paytas]

Or if you were just having play dates with Nick Cannon's kids and your kids. That's cute.

[Tana Mongeau]

Actually, Nick Cannon, one of his babies were born the exact same day as Malibu Barbie. The exact year, same date, September 14th.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's funny how many dates he probably has.

[Tana Mongeau]

The probability is high.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

And it was crazy because I remember not, like, this is such a. Such a stupid thing. This is an influencer thing to think about, but I remember being like, oh, my God, I wonder if anyone else's babies were born on this day. Like, who's gonna get, like, top billing? You know? Baby is born on this day. And then it was like. I was like, okay, no, there's some reason. Then someone's like, oh, Nick Cannon's baby was also born September 14, 2022. And I was like, oh, that's so crazy. So we have somebody. One of the babies has the exact birthday. I don't know.

[Trisha Paytas]

You guys start having joint birthday parties in the middle of your compound. Yeah. Like, that's actually insane.

[Tana Mongeau]

She was. And this. And. And she was so actually, like, over the top. Nice. Like, really nice. And this girl, you can tell she was pretty. She has a Nick Cann. One of her. You know, the dad's one of her children. And I was just, like, humble. I love it. I love it. Because she just looked like someone who'd just be bougie. And I was sweating in our. Like, we had these, like, pumpkin matching sequin. Like, it was cheesy, but I, like, loved it. So I was just like, oh, she looked hot. And I was just, like, dressed in, like, a pumpkin.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, but, like, that's cute. That's just cute. And honestly, you're so right. Like, just people being nice. Like, just having a nice day.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, that's where it started. It was, like, so nice. Like, again, okay. This morning, my makeup artist gave me a makeup lesson. Was so nice. Like, you know, the thing is, a lot of makeup artists don't want to give makeup lessons because they'll think you won't, like, hire them or something. Aria, for literally 15 years. She, like, knows, like, I obviously would always, but she was so nice to do that. Give me all her tips. Then the pumpkin patch. Everyone was, like, so freaking nice. It was wonderful. And the kids had fun. And then, then. Oh, and then we went to Chili's and Chili's. Oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

Chili's was everything we dressed up today was truly. I've done a lot of Halloween costumes.

[Tana Mongeau]

A lot.

[Trisha Paytas]

And today was one of my favorite ones I've ever done in my entire life. Like, because it's so one thing when it's like a miserable shoe and the photos of serve and you're like, that's my favorite costume I've ever done. Right. Or whatever. But it's so another thing when it's like, the most time, the best photos. Like, everyone was so nice. Like, it's just we were. Because Trisha and I were conjoined. Like, it's. It's two mozzarella sticks and then cheese holding us together. So everywhere. One of us had to walk, the other had to, like, follow.

[Tana Mongeau]

That was actually so fun.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it was funny. It made me want to do, like a handcuff challenge or something. We should back in the day.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, I love those. And it. We. It was the official Chili's Cheese pull costume. And Chili's had DM'd you and like, Tana, like, text me instantly, she's like, oh, my God, Chili's DM me. I saw you do like, a tick tock that day. You're like, chili's DM me. It was a big deal.

[Trisha Paytas]

The seas parted. That was crazy because you were, like.

[Tana Mongeau]

In Hawaii for, like, the first day and you like, everything just, like, aligned that day.

[Trisha Paytas]

Everything was aligning. Truly, truly. And like, I was. It's cool. Regardless, I'm always. I need to stop. Like, I love them. Usually I am in their DMs and they were in mine. And that was really cool. And then they sent you the costume too. And then I was just thinking more. I was like, Trisha Paytas. And I being a cheese pull is like the most iconic, hilarious costume ever. So I was like, we have to do it together.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love the triple dipper. You love the cheese ball. I love cheeseball from the Korean fried. The gate was just fitting the Nashville.

[Trisha Paytas]

Mozzarella high, which I love more than anything. I had to use willpower and not eat them because of my diet. But honestly, being it was.

[Tana Mongeau]

But you could eat the cheese. Yeah. Which is good, though. Like, that's a hack. And like, we're Looking at the gluten free menu for Tina, because did we give the update that you are, like, going gluten free and your stomach has felt better? So, like, she's.

[Trisha Paytas]

I do. I am feeling a little better. Where we're assessing it. It's super hard, but there's something everywhere. Like, any diet is manageable. Like, right now we're about to have in and out. And, like, I get my protein style. Like, it's not. Yeah, I'm not suffering, but I couldn't eat the full mozzarella stick, so I decided to be it instead, which.

[Tana Mongeau]

It was so cute. It was so much fun. You do have the best ideas. We. You brought your photographer, Maddie, which I love. I love photographers. I love photographers that are just down to shoot really silly things. Because, like, I have, like, a core group of photographers too, and I just know that they're just down. Like, yeah, the same thing with Arby's. Like, they didn't pay me to do a photo shoot, but because I was getting sponsored, I was like, let's just do a photo shoot for them because it's just so fun. And Isaiah was like, like, can you come here for 10 minutes to film me, like, do a mozzarella stick? You know what I mean? And it was. It was giving the same vibe that she was just down. Like, we were just like, sexy mozzarella.

[Trisha Paytas]

And just the vibes too. Like, I just. I love all the women photographers. Even yesterday, Carrie, I'm just being like, so down for the Halloween. So down for the serve. So fun. Like, it's just. It's great. It's great that it's all women and.

[Tana Mongeau]

And the hype. All women give us so much hype. It's. It's really a different time. Unless I was just, like, looking at things so negatively. But it just feels like such a different time where everyone's hyping everyone up. Like, the Victoria's Secret fashion show happened this, like, past week.

[Trisha Paytas]

And like, like, oh, I saw Quinlan Blackwell. I see so much. She looked in. She looks like not a human being.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I know. She literally. Well, she is. Like, the first time I met her was on a shoot. We both did the Face magazine. And I remember, like, did not know who she was at the time. It was like a couple years ago, so she wasn't like, blown up yet. And I remember just thinking, like, she had, like this long hair down to her ankles. And I was like, that girl's so beautiful.

[Trisha Paytas]

Her body.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, that's like, her.

[Trisha Paytas]

I want to, like, take a Nap on her.

[Tana Mongeau]

She looked insane. Like, there was. And it was. It was cool because, like, there was other influencers just promoting that weren't walking the Runway. So there was like, Tara Yummy was there. I think Nia from Dance Moms was there and they were just like, all hyping each other up. And I just, like, loved that so much. I feel like back in the day, people, like, hated. It's so true. Walked, which was so good. Barbie from Euphoria. Walk, everyone.

[Trisha Paytas]

I love her.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love her too. She looks so good. Like, everyone looked so good and just like the hype people had for everybody. I just love so much.

[Trisha Paytas]

So it's just so nice. I do agree with you. Like, we are in such a women hyping up women era. Even, like, I hadn't been to, like, anything like, insta baddy in a while. I've been in Hawaii, I was on tour. I haven't been, like, going to LA events. And the other night I went to this White Fox like, event and I was, like, nervous on the way. I'm just like, Even the unwell thing, like, as you kind of don't do those things every day, you, like, lose it a little. Like, you lose the ability to not just, like, be so nervous, to not think. Like, as. As I get older, all the things as I'm like, more peaceful, right? I'm like, who am I gonna see? Like, I. Right. Scared. And then I went all the girls from Love island and stuff. Like, everyone was hyping me up. I'm hyping them up. Like, I was like, I love women. I'm gay. Like, this is everything. Yeah, same sorry, Makoa. Like, I'm. It's just like, women are so. It's. I love life right now.

[Tana Mongeau]

Thank you so much to Tinder for sponsoring his episode of Not Loveline. Let's talk about Tinder. Or better yet, let's talk about that deliciously dulu stage of having a new crush. The kind of crush that knocks you down bad, but in the best way.

[Trisha Paytas]

Your heart is melting, your mind is altering, you're cinematically gazing out of car windows.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, amazing news. That crush feeling is waiting for you on Tinder. Like, literally right now.

[Trisha Paytas]

Just imagine the possibilities when you have a crush on someone. They could text you, hey, smiley face on the worst day of your life and boom, suddenly your brain has never had a thought about anything ever. Life is perfect.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, it sounds dramatic because it is. I mean, even the most mundane moments become monumental with a crush. You start clocking things like the sky's exact shade of blue at the time you hear from them on a random Tuesday.

[Trisha Paytas]

We all know that there's no better feeling. And finding a new crush is easier than you think, thanks to Tinder.

[Tana Mongeau]

Explore all the possibilities for yourself, Tinder. It starts with a swag hype download. Tinder today.

[Trisha Paytas]

We love you, Tinder. Let us know. Call us about your Tinder dates. We are so excited, and we love you, Tinder. Thank you for sponsoring.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I do, too. And. And back to the Chilies of it all, too.

[Trisha Paytas]

The. This.

[Tana Mongeau]

The. The whole staff there was, like, unbelievably nice. Went to the Newberry park shot of Newbury Park Chili's. Like, the Encino one is the iconic one. They have the big sign and stuff. But that's a good chili. It's a really good Chili's. But this one was close to me. And you guys are always so sweet. Like, literally everyone came. Maddie, Tana, Devin. Like, everyone came out that way, which is, like, really nice. And it's the Newberry park one. They're really sweet there. And everyone was, like, really sweet. Because we're always scared back in the day to get kicked out. Like, no, you can do photos you can't do. It's like the opposite. We walk in as a cheese pole. We meet Shane, the host right away, and he's like, oh, can you do a video for my girlfriend Julia? Right? And we're like, yeah, absolutely. And then he gave us, like, whatever booth you want. And then we had ordered the cheese sticks to, like, go. But because we're taking photos outside, they got hard. I was like, the pole's not gonna work. I was like, we needed the pull. Yes. We're like, can we reheat these or something? And he, like, took them back. And then Damien, who was one of the cooks there, he came back. He did the fresh.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, just oil dripping, hot.

[Tana Mongeau]

She's. He's like, I heard there's VIPs in the house. Like, and also someone who may not, like, watch our videos or anything. He was just, like, really nice to do it because we were dressed as a cheese pole.

[Trisha Paytas]

Whatever.

[Tana Mongeau]

Maybe he just thought we were super fans or something of Chili's, which we are. And he was so nice. Everyone was, like, so nice.

[Trisha Paytas]

And his girlfriend made cupcakes. And he, like, brought us cupcakes from the back, like, for their staff. Like, it wasn't, like, a Chili's menu item. It was, like, homemade.

[Tana Mongeau]

He came outside to give because we already left, and they came outside to give it to Us. And it was, like, really, really sweet. And then I saw a waitress wearing the sizzle. He was like, that's so cute. Do you sell, like, actually, we do. And then they just came up with a big tub and just, like, gave it to us. Like, anyone else want one? That they were very, very nice. And then. And then it was. Everyone was just overly nice, and they did it all just because. And then at the end, I was just like, oh, my God, we have to, like, just tip them. Because, like, I remember being, like, in the, like, serving whatever. Like, it's just, like, it's so wonderful. So when we gave it, everyone was like, they were, like, so excited, and they didn't expect it, which is, like, really nice.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, they were just being nice to be nice more.

[Tana Mongeau]

I would give them, like, a thousand. You know what I mean? It was because they let us do the shoot. They let us do that. And not only that, they were like, like, like catering to us. And, like, we didn't order, like, a bunch of food because we were kind of in and out for, like, a shoot and. Or in and out to do this shoot to do, not love lion. So everyone was just, like, really nice.

[Trisha Paytas]

So sweet. Even before you got there, I was in there, and these two girls, I walk in and they were like, oh, my God, we're skipping school right now and eating chilies in your honor. Like, I love you. And Trisha, like, they were so sweet. And I see in my honor, by the way, chili's. You heard that.

[Tana Mongeau]

You really did start it. I'm not just saying this, but you've always liked, like, like, clocket, Jimmy, like, all the McMukki made because you've done, like, Amari and you, or even you with Shane and Rylan, you guys were always just eating Chili's, like, every single muck. So it really does feel like now is all over social media because they, like, sponsor as they should. But, like, back in the day, you were like, the chili Queen.

[Trisha Paytas]

You're also a writer for me. Like, she said, clock it, Jimmy. Like, that's a bestie right there. She said, because I keep making jokes that today is, like, the final day, I'm gonna, like, do something for free for chili. What the God honest truth is I'm never gonna stop. I love chilies. But yeah, just Trisha's been so sweet, like, riding for me to get this chili sponsorship. That's imaginary, by the way. Like, it is imaginary.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think it's so gonna happen, and people are gonna be so gagged for it. And I like, will one up it. I think that you should be the face of the sizzling fajitas because they're gluten free. We found out you were like, googling it and I was like, ooh, the fajitas, they're. They're gluten free. I do love the fajitas there. They come out. They do come out. Sizzling.

[Trisha Paytas]

They do.

[Tana Mongeau]

I get. I get those when I go. So I was, like, really excited.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, I'm a triple dipper girl till I die, but now I have to kind of.

[Tana Mongeau]

What was the other one? The chips and white queso is gluten free, so you just have to go and do the gluten free. You be the face of the gluten free menu.

[Trisha Paytas]

Trying it. I'm so ready and so excited.

[Tana Mongeau]

I just.

[Trisha Paytas]

But regardless, Trisha, like, being. Because yesterday we were your costume and I was so happy to be a part of it and included and you set everything up for me. Like, I couldn't. I left and like, was just like, that was so sweet of her and like, what an iconic photo. And like, I just. I had this moment this morning where I was just saying to Mokoa, like, a million girls around the world would, like, die to get to do a Halloween costume with Trisha. And, like, I get to go do it and, like, have the most fun. And like, I feel the same. I love you.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love you too. I feel the same.

[Trisha Paytas]

You did mine today and like, I had the best time ever. It was so fun.

[Tana Mongeau]

You were so sweet. You're like, literally took us like 20 minutes to do photos. You're like, okay, just like 10 more minutes and then we never have to do this again. I'm like, you literally sat in a chair for like three hours for the past side neck. Then you did this whole shoot for three hours. Then you, like, sat in the neck longer. Like, you literally, like, gave so much yesterday. So I feel the same way. And that was so much fun.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it was like, we had big sunnies and you have your Pamela up doing. We had on heels with the mozzarella stick. Like, we were serving fashion. We were giving Alex Kasani.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes, it was giving that. I was like, are we in the VICT secret fashion show right now?

[Trisha Paytas]

We were Chili's Angels.

[Tana Mongeau]

And then we wore the heels in. So then we were going around trying to, like, tip everyone and we were like, okay, come this way. Ch. Ch. Like, Shay, come here. Cuz he was so far away. I'm like. And we're just like traveling trapped Together.

[Trisha Paytas]

Which was like honestly really funny. Like that's right.

[Tana Mongeau]

Cuz at one point you're like okay, we should like go.

[Trisha Paytas]

And then I was like, okay, but.

[Tana Mongeau]

I gotta stay here. So we're like going back and forth.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm like following Trisha everywhere she's going. Cuz we're connected by cheese. Which honestly just my soul, like literally my.

[Tana Mongeau]

It turned out good. I was surprised. It is a funny costume because if you are two different body types, like it does look drastically different because it's two ends of a chees cheesesteak. So like yours is like this like beautiful. Like it's like you know, this whole.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like you were giving. Okay, I was giving plank.

[Tana Mongeau]

Mine was giving like a little bit of like the cheese stick there. It was like so funny.

[Trisha Paytas]

You were giving. You looked hot as it was cute.

[Tana Mongeau]

I will never.

[Trisha Paytas]

Don't talk bad about my friend Trisha. It was so hot.

[Tana Mongeau]

But good thing we didn't wear the mini dresses because I would have been like cooch out on that one.

[Trisha Paytas]

It was like, it was. We did it perfectly. And like everything just aligned so perfectly for us. It was lining for the last time before you are off to New York on Broadway.

[Tana Mongeau]

But we're gonna do. We're doing one in New York because he has. Yeah, New York. And I think that'd be so fun. I love a podcast in a different setting, you know, Me too. Because just the vibes like where you at? Like today we went out and did something before and like the vibes are so good because we have like so much energy like from that and to.

[Trisha Paytas]

Talk about and just I think it's really cool too now how every time we see each other we are like. It's like I'm just talking about us becoming closer friends, like that's it. But I just mean like we're like, let's do this and this and we have new plans and things to look forward to too. Like life is just very, very special right now. And loveliners. Thank you for like bringing us together too and calling in and watching this show because we are reaping the benefits.

[Tana Mongeau]

We do have so much fun with it. I know because you do go to Hawaii for a certain amount of time and if I'm gone, like whatever it brings us like back together. And it's like it feels like, okay, we have to get in the books with them when we do it. It's like we're here for like literally seven hours.

[Trisha Paytas]

How lucky are we to also have found this format? I was saying this last night to Ashley and Isabella, I was talking about this. I was like, how lucky, lucky our Trish and I to have this format where like you can go do Broadway for however long or I can go to Hawaii. Like, I've only ever done a long form format where it was based on being weekly and current and time and current events. Like, thank God for our 15, 000 callers who want advice from us, who allow us to live this flexible, like, beautiful. I'm just so grateful.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I am too. I love it. And it doesn't revolve. Doesn't have to revolve around drama or other people and stuff like that. Just like trying to help people.

[Trisha Paytas]

So this, this era is just like, oh my God, I'm like, I'm so beyond grateful. Even just having. Cuz it's like when we started not Loveline, I didn't think canceled would come to an end as when it was because it, it wasn't as dramatic and taking a toll on Brooke and I and all of those things. But now I'm like, wow, thank God I have this to kind of keep me in podcasting shape for like my future and just like something to do, like not twiddle my thumbs freaked out.

[Tana Mongeau]

That is a scary part of anything ending, right? Is I was thinking about that too with you or just like with anything. It's happened to me too. It's like when something ends and you're like, okay, this is like a chapter ended. It's like, wow, like what now? Yeah, 100% yeah. No, then this is. Yeah, this was going on when like canceled tapping wanted to be so different from that. And same thing for gesture show. It's kind of nice too that it's just like a different thing altogether.

[Trisha Paytas]

It really is. And it's our thing and it's our baby. And just like even lately we've been like manifesting or talking about what would happen if someone buys it or like what would happen if we wanted to go on a little tour and like do live. Obviously we joke about Madison Square Garden in the forum. Who knows?

[Tana Mongeau]

But that's it. That's Madison Square Garden in the forum. That's it. And I, Yeah, I think that too. I was like, I want to do like, like a, like a call in like, yeah, just like more production where we can like take live calls and we can maybe have like video calls, like where it just becomes more and more. And it's not just like, we love to do it in my house, but like we could do it other Places too. We can have like a studio. We could have like whatever. I don't know.

[Trisha Paytas]

And seeing it grow, like our baby literally grow. And just like even like Vegas, like getting opportunities where people are like, you guys, it was really cute in Vegas. I forgot to talk about this, but you and I did the dress rehearsal all on stage and we were just like riffing, being ourselves, like being funny, like trying to read the teleprompter, which y' all know I suck at, and add in our own jokes and stuff. And then afterwards, this guy comes up to me and he goes, the chemistry that the two of you have is so amazing. Like, you guys just have something. You guys should have a show together. And I go, we do.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. We actually do.

[Trisha Paytas]

It was so.

[Tana Mongeau]

He was nice too, because he's just like, he was just like a sound guy. Yeah. Like works at the cosmic. You know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, like he definitely didn't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, not at all.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's what made it sweeter.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, you were so funny and it's so funny. Cuz it was like tech rehearsal. I was like, oh, that's so nice.

[Trisha Paytas]

And just like a stranger, like seeing our chemistry and literally being like, you guys should have a show together. Like we do.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, that was, that was fun. That was really cool. No, very lucky and happy and honored and life is, is fun right now. It's always fun.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I just, I love Halloween. Like, this is a great month.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, you have like a busy. Yeah. Busy Halloween, which is like crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, you too though, Miss Tap Dancer.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, yeah, the tap dancer is coming next week or I'm tapping next week. Yeah, it's a whole thing. But you know, it's fun and it's great and. And then I love. And then I love when Thanksgiving comes because then you can eat food and go home and you're playing poker and then we do Christmas. It's like Disney and Christmas and food. And it's just like, it is such.

[Trisha Paytas]

A good time, the holiday.

[Tana Mongeau]

And it's.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's so wild because I like really spent so much of my life, like dreading the holidays or hating them or not feeling like I didn't have family. I'm like, I really hope I can be the poster child for all the girls out there that like, you can create your own things that feel like family and feel like love and feel like friendship and memories and just all of these things. Like your life can expand and grow with you.

[Tana Mongeau]

You're like surround. But I love it. I always say that about you. It's like, you're so lucky to have found, like, people that just, like, you love and that love you. And, like, I think we. I don't know if we. I got. We podcast so much. Like, do we talk about this after? Before? I don't remember. But you were saying, like, you can just maybe I asked you on the podcast or Patreon, where I was like, you know, when you go home because you were so tired from podcasting, I'm like, do you just, like, isolate? And you're like, no. It's like. But, like, I'm so close with Amari, Ashley, and Isabelle that, like, we can just, like, sit there and just, like, be quiet, be on our phones, whatever. But it's, like, still hanging out with everybody. I'm like, that's, like. That's, like family, you know?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. And just talking about our day. Like, Ashley was. What did she cook last night? She cooked some kind of, like. Like, beef bowl or something. So she was in the kitchen cooking, and me and Isabella were just, like, talking and, like, it just.

[Tana Mongeau]

This is a cozy vibe. It's a family.

[Trisha Paytas]

Very family. Isabella, like, hurt her shoulder, so I was teaching her my scoliosis stretches. Like, literally, just family.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love that.

[Trisha Paytas]

But it's cute.

[Tana Mongeau]

That makes me happy for you, too, because it is. It's like, it's hard, like, if you don't have, like, people always say, like, only child, likes, no siblings or your parents, obviously, you know, you find your family.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's it. Being born an only child, like, I never thought that I would get to, like, have these bonds with people. And it's like I've been sitting at a dinner table with Isabella, like, for almost 15 years. You know, like, it's like they. They are my family. Yes. We're planning a little potluck for Amari's birthday because his birthday is the 22nd. His birthday is in five days.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my gosh.

[Trisha Paytas]

Are you doing.

[Tana Mongeau]

Is that what you're doing tonight?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, we're starting the celebration. We're going to Shawn Mendes. He's like, Amari, like, would die for Sean. Wait, really?

[Tana Mongeau]

I didn't know this. Where's he playing?

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, Sean is his lock screen. Like, that is his dream mansion.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

So he's playing the Hollywood Bowl. So today I will have been a Mozzarell, shot four episodes of Not Loveline, and then I'm going to see Shawn Mendes at the Hollywood Bowl. I'm about to take up, like, smoking crack or something. I'm so tired.

[Tana Mongeau]

You're like, the second half of the day I try to do everything in the morning and then this is like it for me. That is so true. Like, you're just going now.

[Trisha Paytas]

Your pumpkin patch is my Shawn Mendes. Like, our timelines just are different timing.

[Tana Mongeau]

Full day. But that's so fun. Do I. Do you do? I don't even know if people do this or care. I love, like, doing like a mean greets. Does do mean greets or. No, you're not doing that.

[Trisha Paytas]

I would have loved to. For Amare. Like, I want Amare to have. I want. If I was. Was like, rich or famous enough, Shawn Mendes would be performing in our living room for Amari. Like, Sean, please. I just need to see it in my lifetime. Like, that's his. Adam Sandler. Justin Bieber. Like, that's his.

[Tana Mongeau]

I don't know.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, he ask him about it. He'll tell you all. No, we actually. We saw him at a nightclub at on the Rocks one night. He was like, behind us and Amari was freaking out.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think if you really love someone, right, like, you're Adam Sandler. My draw. I think it's just, like, you have to say something.

[Trisha Paytas]

Right. I need to ask Amari, like, what his. Why he didn't. I can't remember. We were up for sure. Like, maybe we were just too.

[Tana Mongeau]

Maybe that's the time to do it that way.

[Trisha Paytas]

That was me. I was like, I love you to everyone.

[Tana Mongeau]

Did you Mendes?

[Trisha Paytas]

No, not to Sean. And then I'm trying to think if I've had any other Shawn Mendes interactions. I can't. My brain is in abyss. But I definitely want to make that happen for Amari. And so, yeah, we're doing that tonight and I'm excited and so that he.

[Tana Mongeau]

Doesn'T do, like, a meet and greet before a show. I don't know if people.

[Trisha Paytas]

If he does and I didn't get it for Amari, I'm the worst sister alive. I need to, like, look into it. But we will make it. I'm manifesting in our lifetime.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love a meet and greet before a show. Like, if we go to Donnie Asman. Want us to. I want to. I just, like, stand in line and, like, take a picture.

[Trisha Paytas]

I would literally. I can't. I literally can't wait to go back to Vegas and do that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, that's like, my everything. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

You, me, and Donny Osman. It's because, you know, like, the Vegas lore means everything. Yeah. Like, Vegas history is my favorite.

[Tana Mongeau]

He's been there 25 years with do first with Maria. Now he's been There.

[Trisha Paytas]

So I like from me being born like I. There's never a time I don't remember where Donnie really?

[Tana Mongeau]

That is actually so crazy cuz I remember when they first got. Got their residents. That is wild.

[Trisha Paytas]

Wow.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh my God. Yeah. My dad took me to see him when I was 10 years old in Vegas, so.

[Trisha Paytas]

And that's so crazy how those things like end up shaping your and just invisible string. Like that's so wild. Like you were like seeing Donny Osmond. Like just like we didn't know each other. Like it is weird how much crossover and like interests and like lifestyles we have.

[Tana Mongeau]

That is true because like when I went you were probably literally being born in Vegas. So we were there at the same time as at the MGM New York, NY and seeing Donny Osmond and I.

[Trisha Paytas]

Was like, remember when New York New York was like bougie?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, that's when I saw him. It was really. Yeah. We went there with Malibu and I think I'm like, it's gonna be all like dark and dingy.

[Trisha Paytas]

It just. Yeah, no, like the roller coaster is a little rickety. It gives old Vegas strip now, you know.

[Tana Mongeau]

But Circus Circus still there. It's done. It's still there, but it's gonna be done right?

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't know. I think it might be. It's across the street from Resorts world so I see it every time. And I'm always telling people the lore because like growing up there, like when people. Did you. Did you grow up in a casino? I'm like damn near like circus. Circus was the one where like parents would take their kids and then they could gamble, you know.

[Tana Mongeau]

Did you see you still have a circus when. When you were there? Like. Because when I was a kid they had the circus going but it's been closed. Like animals, like performers, like trapeze artists at the top, like at the very top.

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't remember that. Really.

[Tana Mongeau]

They used to have like a full on circus.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like I just remember like arcades.

[Tana Mongeau]

I think where the arcade is is where it used to be and there's like remnants of the old. Like the. Really? That's so funny. They don't have it there. Yeah, I was like really little one.

[Trisha Paytas]

And now it's like you walk in and step on the ground and like a big cloud of dust comes out from your foot.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like it is. Where would you rather stay? Circus Circus or the Luxor? Thank you so much to SeatGeek for sponsoring today's episode of Not Loveline.

[Trisha Paytas]

I am so excited to see Trisha Paytas live on Broadway using SeatGeek.

[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

Customer service, which is why we want to give the sponsor of today's video, SeatGeek, a major shout out. With over 35 million downloads, SeatGeek is the number one rated ticketing app.

[Tana Mongeau]

It is great. And I know My Chemical Romance is going on tour next year, so I'm excited to see them. Cat's eye, everyone has tickets for. It is wonderful. Seatgeek has your back. Each ticket is rated on a scale of 1 to 10, so you know you're getting a good deal. So look for the green dots. Green means good, red means bad.

[Trisha Paytas]

Plus, every ticket is backed by their buyer guarantee.

[Tana Mongeau]

So get those plans out of the group chat this fall and use code not loveline10 for 10 off your SeatGeek tickets.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's 10 off tickets with promo code not loveline10.

[Tana Mongeau]

Make sure you click the link in the description to download the app and have the code automatically added to your account so you can use it later.

[Trisha Paytas]

Thank you, seatgeek, for sponsoring today's episode of Not Loveline. We love you, seatgeek. I just saw the wizard of Oz using.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. I used SE for my wizard of Oz fear tickets. And they were amazing. And it was amazing.

[Tana Mongeau]

So from Vegas to New York, SeatGeek has you covered. We've observed. Thank you for sponsoring and giving tickets to the Sphere.

[Trisha Paytas]

Seriously. No, serious. We love se. They know it. They know it.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. Looking for Backstreet Boys next at the Sphere.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my God. I would love in living room.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yes. All right. Or Johnny Osmond.

[Trisha Paytas]

Call us Circus Circus because the Luxor is so haunted. Yeah, it is so haunted. Like, and I've had that thing happen that people talk about, like, the. Where the elevator takes you to, like, not the floor that you request. And it's like, this has literally happened to me where, like, let's say you're on the 10th floor and the elevator, because the building is slanted. It isn't an elevator. It is like hanging on a thing. Like, the. The mechanism that they had to make for the elevators is already like, you're, like, rocking.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, my God. I mean, oh, my God.

[Trisha Paytas]

And then you put in your floor, and then it'll just take you to, like, the basement.

[Tana Mongeau]

Stop it.

[Trisha Paytas]

And, like, it's happened to me, and it's so creepy. Like, it is so, like, this is very morbid, but, like, lots of stories of people feeling fine, going to stay there, feeling so dark that they want to end their own life, and jumping into the. The middle, like, and then it's like they have the bodies exist exhibit, which is, like, their biggest show or, like, exhibit or thing you can go see. It's literally called Bodies. And it's just, like, why? Like, human body, like, like, being preserved. Like, human bodies being preserved, like, all in this thing. Mind you, when the Luxor was built, a bunch of people died building it, and they just built it on top of their bodies. So then what? You're gonna put the bodies exhibit in the actual hotel that was built on top of all the bodies? Like, I hate you. I hate you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my God. I can't. I just went there. Like, I mean, I just went there recently after that whole tangent. It is my least favorite hotel on the Strip, but they just put this thing in it called Play, and it's like a adult, like, arcade type of thing. So McCo and I went on a date there. And, like, I ran through the hotel. We played in the place, and I actually vlogged it all. I didn't post it because of copyright music, but the bartender who was working at this Play place that we were at, every time I'm there, I ask all the workers to tell me their stories because it does kind of fascinate me. And the bartender was like, I've been working here for 50 years. So, like, I always have worked at, like, bars here. And so I have to close the bar at night when, like, no one's here. And he was telling me multiple times across a room he has seen at a bar. And this man was 50. He didn't know I was filming him. Like, he was, like, just telling me the truth. You know, he's seen bottles just go flying and shattering. Like, he's like, no, no, no.

[Tana Mongeau]

Haunted. Absolutely. Why did you go there? Why that place? Why didn't you go anywhere else?

[Trisha Paytas]

Because they don't have the Play thing anywhere else. And we did have a good time, but, like, I got the out of there, like, as soon as I.

[Tana Mongeau]

It was fun. While you were there.

[Trisha Paytas]

It was fun, but, like, just still, like, there is that lingering of, like, I'm in the Luxor. I'm in the Luxor. Get me out.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like. Yeah, I didn't know any of that. Cuz we. We go all the time to see Carrot Top. Maybe my mom was care Top. We go see him all the time at the Luxor. He's been there literally like 20 years.

[Trisha Paytas]

Have you stayed there? No, don't ever.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, that part. I know but like it also. It doesn't feel like a good vibe when you go in there. Just. I think Chris angel used to be there. Blue Man Group used to be there. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And no, it's. It's very iconic. Like even growing up, like, like lots of things, family functions, things like of other people's. Not mine. But we're at the Luxor and stuff. Like it's. It is iconic Vegas. But like get me personally. Yeah, don't stay the out of like resorts world anywhere. I love heras and say at hara stay anywhere but the Luxor. It's passionate.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh wow. Wow. But they do have really good nachos at Diablos. Have you ever had Mexican Devil? Why?

[Trisha Paytas]

It's. It's like get. What else? Like, I just. No, I don't. I don't give a.

[Tana Mongeau]

About the nachos. The nachos are so good because we always go there before Carrot Top. It was a whole vibe.

[Trisha Paytas]

I do love Carrot Top.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love. We should have him on that loveline. He came on just. And he was my favorite guest. He like came straight from the airport from Vegas. I was like, I love this guy. He was great.

[Trisha Paytas]

I would do anything.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's really funny.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, I've never really.

[Tana Mongeau]

You're so Vegas. I feel like he's everywhere because Holly knows. I'm like, I feel like he's the Vegas.

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't know. Like maybe I have got a memory.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like maybe he's like my favorite. He's my mom's favorite too. He was so nice. He was like literally sitting here like with Malibu. We have pictures with him. Like he was just like the nicest and he came so far. And then he had to go to Howie Mandel's podcast right after. He's like running late. Cuz he's running late here. He's like, we got time, it's fine. Like he was just like so sweet. I love.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, I love that. I love car.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love Carrot Top too.

[Trisha Paytas]

He has everything.

[Tana Mongeau]

We go to Luxor to see him.

[Trisha Paytas]

We're gonna now like on it. Maybe we can get a private show.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

This is not the. Oh my God. I wonder what His Luxor stories are. Because if he's a residency there, well.

[Tana Mongeau]

Maybe we should do a Vegas, not loveline 2. An interview would die.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know what? I do it for that. I do it for that.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's all haunted. Things just go fly.

[Trisha Paytas]

Colby show up. Like, we, like, do the whole thing, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

But Kobe's crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

They are so funny. Have you ever watched salmon Kobe?

[Tana Mongeau]

I know nothing about them. One time a girl came up to me at the taco place here in Thousand Oaks and was like, I'm Kobe's from Sam and Kobe's girlfriend. I was like, oh, nice to meet. She's beautiful.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, my God. I don't think about him.

[Tana Mongeau]

She. Oh, you know her?

[Trisha Paytas]

I know her, but she's also Makoa's best friend. Friend's sister. It's such a, like, small.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, she's really pretty. Like a little crop top. And I was just like, again, always intimidated by a pretty girl and oh, I like, love you. And I was like, oh, my God, I love you. And then I'm like, are you an influencer? Because she just looked like one and she's like, no, my boyfriend. I was like, who's your boyfriend? Sam and Kobe. That's Colby from Sam and Kobe.

[Trisha Paytas]

I was like, okay, that's cute. I love Sam and Colby.

[Tana Mongeau]

I like, I know nothing about them.

[Trisha Paytas]

They make. They make like they did. They're like the type of YouTuber who deserves, like a Netflix show. Like, they make like Netflix level content about what? Ghost hunting. And it's so fascinating and real and like, they've asked me to do videos. I love them. I just like, I hate the ghost world. Like, it's not my vibe.

[Tana Mongeau]

Cuz you need to like, bring it home with you or something.

[Trisha Paytas]

And like, my. I had my sleep paralysis era where I like, I just like, I've had moments in my life where I like were dark like that and I believe in it and I just like want to be away from it. But I wish I could like, even like Quinlan Blackwell, like, went to the conjuring house, like the real conjuring house with them. And like, it's one of the most iconic videos.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, I'd be so scared. Yeah, anything, like possession or anything. I'm scared. Like, Ouija board boards don't come near my house with that. Like, I'm like, no.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. Paige is always like, can we do a Ouija board? I'm like, I'll go to Sephora with you all day. Like, I love you. Like, I'm not doing that.

[Tana Mongeau]

I'll be Alabama Barker bad, baby. But no Ouija board.

[Trisha Paytas]

That is where I draw the line.

[Tana Mongeau]

I agree. Because like I, I'm with you. I do believe like ghost. I'm like. But also I'm just like, you know what, let them just be in their little ghost world, you know, Because I need to just chill here.

[Trisha Paytas]

I remember Shane Dawson would always like whenever I'd like come over, would always be like trying to get me to do a Ouija board with him. And I'd like really like threatened to leave like multiple times. So crazy that happened multiple times.

[Tana Mongeau]

That was never ever one's proposition. I knew him for like 15 years. That's crazy. I didn't know he was into that.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, I don't maybe just cuz I was so like freaking out about it.

[Tana Mongeau]

But he's like, we're gonna do this. Oh my gosh, I'm so excited. We're only 36 minutes. Why did you been talking for two? Literally we do that.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, we do that.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know, I know. Should we take like a break?

[Trisha Paytas]

We always talk about this but like you and I are. We're just off camera for like almost an hour. And like we did a full podcast. Like we never stop yapping. We're talking about Jake Paul AI. We were talking about the sidemen show on Netflix. We like, like would have been messy. It would have been a messy podcast.

[Tana Mongeau]

But that's why, that's our growth. Right? Because I always say this. I mean, everyone loves a good gossip, right? We love like gossiping. That's the whole. That's the world. Like British hand was gossiping in 1800. Like that's the world. It's just like. Yeah, you don't do it in front of other people. You know, you don't like do it for the world to see or to humiliate.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's like just gossiping. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like this is, it's. This is my new era. Like normalizing gossiping off camera. It's not.

[Tana Mongeau]

And it's not even like bad. But stuff like, it's like if you talked about the Jake Paul AI, it's just like, ah. And if you talked about this, you know, it's just like the Simon was just a bunch of influencers is. And you know what?

[Trisha Paytas]

It's like, it'd be like, it'd be messier. Yeah. And I'm just like, oh, it's no need.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Because we got it all out of our system. And again, nothing like bad. But most night we're. We're gossipers we're like all day long. But like, there's just no need to like broadcast.

[Trisha Paytas]

Not everything needs to be getting out of your system with a friend or like, whatever is so nice. Like even in Hawaii when the sidemen show dropped, I like went on in a hour long tangent to Makoa and then I was like, how nice is this that like I'm so secure in where I'm at and I don't feel this need to like defend myself and like, you know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

You have a person to let it out with.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. That like it doesn't have to be on camera and like adding fuel to this fire. Like, I just, I am protecting love.

[Tana Mongeau]

That era for you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Because even like just the beginning of this podcast and today like life is so amazing right now. And it's like I just, I want to protect that and realizing that I can be my own worst enemy and the quality of my life when it comes to my mouth.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, same, same. I think with that so many things with, with gossiping or trying to defend yourself, but then there's so many other things, you know, with. I don't even know how to like, just like being angry. Like you could be angry at someone like if things don't go your way. But it's like just like protecting the piece. Like I can choose to be angry or I could choose to just keep moving. You know what I mean? 100.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's such a message for like all the girls out there in like their early twenties who are like. Because I was so that girl too in my early 20s where I like was talking like being messy and like, if a boyfriend pissed me off, I was doing the craziest thing or like, whatever and like it will come to an end. And like at the same too. In my early 20s, I'd be doing all the crazy and I'd be like, why is my life so crazy? And it's like, you, you are why your life is so crazy.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, that's very, very true. And it's not really because of you, but it's like what you, you put out, right? The. What is it? Newton's law? Like what you put out is what you attract, right? So it's like same. I was doing exposed videos and drama and crying and then the universe gave me more drama to cry over. You know what I mean? You want to cry? You want to keep crying? Okay, well I'll give you more stuff to cry over. And so it's the same thing. And then the minute you can find some joy Some happiness. It's like, oh, you want more to be joyful. You want more to be thankful for. You want more good things to happen to you. Like, just keep talking about the good things.

[Trisha Paytas]

You also really do, like, motivate me to do that. Like, even like on our plane delay day, like, I keep saying I have the worst luck. And you're like, tana, don't say that. Because then more like bad luck will come to you. Even, like on the way here, I was like, I started to say just something because I'm always flippantly saying, like, oh, I have bad luck, or oh, like, like, you know, and I like, started to say it and then I was like, you know what? I'm pulling a trisha. Like, we have the best luck and life is great and we're so lucky.

[Tana Mongeau]

You should think you're so lucky. I know that's tick tock because tick tock started that trend. The lucky girl center ones, like, I'm the luckiest girl in the world. Like, everything I want comes my way. Like, only good news comes away. So it's like this mantras that people repeating. And like, you have to start saying that because if you think about it, you kind of are luckiest girl, because that's what you said earlier in the podcast. You're like, I get to do this job. It's very, like, you know, flexible. I can go to Hawaii for a month. I can do whatever. I can play.

[Trisha Paytas]

And it's all like, made for me by these, like, beautiful girls and gays and things that, like, I literally would, would die for, like, luck.

[Tana Mongeau]

I mean, it is luck. And I. Not to say, like, you're not hard working in town. No, it's me. I think that too. I think it's luck. So you have to say, like, I'm very lucky. I'm very lucky that people are watching because again, that's luck. Think about all the influencers that started even when I was starting or when you were starting to be here, to still be here.

[Trisha Paytas]

Holy, that's so lucky.

[Tana Mongeau]

It is luck. I mean, there is something to say. Like, you have a good personality, of course, but like, so many people, many people do. It's.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's the most oversaturated market in the world. And like, the fact that we have found this place that feels like home in the most oversaturated new person, person market is. I always say that I have good bad luck, which I'm still stopping. Like, yeah, I have the best luck when it comes to the big things. Like, my Overall, my life and, like, yes, but, like, I'm gonna stub my toe. Like, I have. I have, like, like anecdotal, like, little bad lucks. But I'm done saying even that. Like, I'm hoping to rewrite that.

[Tana Mongeau]

As well you should, because I'm. I used to be very klutzy, and I stopped saying that because I used to tell people, like, I'm just klutzy. I'm just cutting. I always be falling, and I haven't fallen in a long time, so knock on wood.

[Trisha Paytas]

I need to. I just. I just had the fall of a century in Vegas, so I'm hoping that was my last one. That was. It was out of a cartoon.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, well, Vegas, you were very, like, stressed. And I was like. And I know it's easier said than done because it's so easy to say mantras, but if you ever find yourself being, like, overwhelmed or thinking everything's going wrong, just think of all the things that are going right. We were together on the plane. We were doing unwell. Like, we were doing, like, you know, there was so many things going right.

[Trisha Paytas]

100. It's so true. It's like, that is just focus on the good. No matter how anecdotal the good is. Like, that just. And more will come. It's. It's so true.

[Tana Mongeau]

Or also in your case, it's like, you know, this is a great story time. This will make for a great story. You know what I mean?

[Trisha Paytas]

That has always been my favorite thing about my life is even when the most inconveniencing or bad thing or just, like, crazy thing is happening, I'm like, this is a story. This is a memory. Like, even in Vegas, I kept saying to you, like, this is going to be a phenomenal memory. Like, right now, we're, like, running through the rain trying to, like, protect the way we look for the show tonight. And it was chaotic and, like, whatever, but now it's like, I see it, like, bird's eye. It's like me and Trisha Paytas in full showgirl hair and makeup. Like, running through jackets over our heads in Vegas while the fans come up and we take photo. Like, that's.

[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

Thank you so much to DraftKings Casino for sponsoring today's episod.

[Trisha Paytas]

We love you, DraftKings.

[Tana Mongeau]

Love you, DraftKings.

[Trisha Paytas]

Someone go win some money.

[Tana Mongeau]

That is so With a jacket over my head, Van Cleef on my wrist.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh my God.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's.

[Trisha Paytas]

That's literally like out of a movie. You're so lucky that that's your life.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, you're so lucky. And that's the thing. So the I'm lucky mantra, I think works so well. And yeah, it's changed my life too in like so many ways because I was so negative for so long. And the things you say really do manifest. I think everyone's on the manifestation kick now. I think everyone believes in it. I don't think there's any questions. Passionate work. So I think like, everybody can have it. And like, the secret is the best one, like manifesting 101 to like, figure it out. But it talks about how the universe is abundance, where there's like, there's no shortage of anything. Like everybody can have good things happen to them. So like, just because someone else is winning doesn't mean you will. Because there's an abundance of literally everything. The universe one's good for everybody. So you never have to be like, well, that person got that. So I'm not gonna get that. It's like, no, there's just like enough for everybody. And that's trolls and. Of everything. Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And just like I like it is about what you focus on. Because even if you're like so focused on something you didn't get, maybe you missed like, how kind a person was to you, like in public that day. Or you missed like, who's really there for you in your life. And just like even, just I don't even that call that we got yesterday. Like, I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Like, I just don't want to be 90 and think like, wow, I passed up on like anything. You know, whether that's gratitude or whether that's like stopping and smelling the roses or whether that's like being like, this is so iconic and fun or whether that's just anything like me trust truly.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, yeah, no, I know you don't want to. Yeah, exactly. You don't want to be 90 being like, why was I. Why did I want to go out? Because I felt that why didn't do this. Because of this. It's like there's just so many things to just go out and, and seize and get. And I feel, yeah, is divine protection too.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's just like, it's so all the things that I thought I wanted so badly. Like the amount of years of my life I spent heartbroken over things that like, I thought I needed. Needed or you know what I mean? Just like, like ended up not serving me and ended up bringing me to like this part of my life. And now it's like, I just have so much trust in that, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, trust it for sure. Yeah. I was so focused on men. I was a male centered person. Like, everything, it was all about a man of my life. And like, thank God those don't work out because every person broke up with me or blocked me. I've never broken up with someone, They've always broken up with me. And I'm like, I thought it was like the end of the world. Like, I literally was just like, I want to end it all. And it's just like so crazy to think, like, look back and be like, thank God that did not work out. I wouldn't have met Moses. But then Moses brought so much, much in my life stability. And now I can do all I love joy. And it's like also like focusing me and prioritizing myself where all these other men just expect me to drop stuff for them or I would just do it on my own free will and then drop me later. And it was just like, damn. I really lost so much of my life trying to like, be with like for something that that wasn't meant for me.

[Trisha Paytas]

100 same. Yeah, 100 same. And that is like, oh my God. Every time I just saw one of my girlfriends I hadn't seen in a while the other night, night, and she was like, I just, my man just broke up with me, like two years, like, whatever. And immediately I'm like, congratulations, you Know, because it's like, she's like, he was a sociopath. I'm like, girl. Like, it's, you know, like, just. You can't always see it in the moment. But it's like, I always tell people going through a breakup or trying to leave, a man who can't decide, like, congratulations, it is the best thing you'll ever do. Like, it's sad, but then, like, it opens such new doors for a whole new life. To a whole new life.

[Tana Mongeau]

Better life, I think, has always a better thing coming as far as, like, when it comes just naturally, just eventually.

[Trisha Paytas]

The good is gonna come. I feel like I had to, like, go through a lot of breakups and, like, back to back to back to back. But it, like, all shaped me to be, like, ready for what I was meant for, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, no, it's a great. It's a great thing. Keep going. Be thankful for the little wins in life, like I said. Even today, doing our little Chili's outings, I just, like, so thankful for everyone being so nice because it's like, I don't know, just. Just, like, nice to be around nice people, to be in the real world and, like, I don't know, have, like, restore your faith in humanity. Like, wow, people are just nice people.

[Trisha Paytas]

That is so, so, so, so, so true.

[Tana Mongeau]

Because they could have looked at us and, like, this is annoying. You're disrupting us. Like, this is whatever, you know? Even though we're, like, being nice, obviously, but, like, they were all, like, overly nice. And even the people who, like, didn't know.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's so funny, like, perspective, too, because the second you focus on, like, people being nice, you notice it, like, yeah, more versus the other way around.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

You know what I mean? No.

[Tana Mongeau]

We came in and I was like, the best chilies, and they gave us these shirts and they brought them out of town. It was just, like, really nice and really fun, and it was wonderful. And we had great in and out. That was good. We took a little in and out break. Tana's so sweet to always pause because I can't eat cold food.

[Trisha Paytas]

I love that about her. I really, like. I think it's very cute that you do that. And I'm always gonna make sure Trisha Paytas has her hot food.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, as soon as it comes in, I'm like, okay, stop right now. Just. Yeah, mid topic.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, we could actually be, like. We could actually be, like, saying the declaration. Like, you could be saying your vows. Like, I, like. And, like, you're like, no, no, no, this food is hot. We're eating it now. And I actually like it made. Made me like, just think about that with everything. Like, it's, it's kind of. If you think about it, it's a bigger mantra like, than just like, eat it. It's. It's about enjoying things in life to their full capacity. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

We should go on a motivational speaking tour.

[Trisha Paytas]

I would love Mel Robbins. Move over, ho. Kidding.

[Tana Mongeau]

Mel Robbins.

[Trisha Paytas]

Kidding. She's the power of the of now.

[Tana Mongeau]

Oh, really?

[Trisha Paytas]

She's like, she's. She's on the yes theory, right? Oh, no. She's the let them theory.

[Tana Mongeau]

Let them. Let them.

[Trisha Paytas]

Let them.

[Tana Mongeau]

Let them.

[Trisha Paytas]

If they want to do this, let them.

[Tana Mongeau]

Is she related to Tony Robbins? No. No. That's kind of crazy though that they're both like motivational.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like motivational robins.

[Tana Mongeau]

They can go on tour together. Okay, interesting.

[Trisha Paytas]

But she is. She like really blew up. Like, this generation really loves.

[Tana Mongeau]

What's the let them? I don't know. It.

[Trisha Paytas]

Let them is kind of just like whatever someone wants to do. Like, let them. Like if your boyfriend wants to break up with you, let them. If like someone wants to be rude, let them. Like, don't like the amount of time that you spend ruminating essentially on people doing things and why things are happening the way they are. Like just to let.

[Tana Mongeau]

Let them happen. That's.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, just let. I like that the five second rule is what too. It's like, just like whatever it is, like if you can do it within five seconds, like, do it. Or like don't think or think about something for more than five seconds, just do it.

[Tana Mongeau]

It's giving. Yes, man.

[Trisha Paytas]

Break any bad habit, interrupt self. It's straightforward. Count backwards from five to one and then take action immediately in the morning. I should start doing that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wait, Deciding what to eat. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

[Trisha Paytas]

You just do like. It's like, I see how that's effective.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay, that sounds stressful.

[Trisha Paytas]

It does sound stressful. But I have like, Like I'm very adhd and one of the things that come with ADHD is ADHD paralysis. Like, you'll be so stuck in like, like, I need to do my laundry. I need to do my laundry. I need to do my laundry versus just like 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. I'm going to go do my laundry. Like, instead of like, you know what I mean? That, like thinking about it. So it is like, that's this guy saying, I've used it for the past 21 days straight for stopping impulse buys which normally he's. I see it, I buy it, but count back from five to one. When I hit one, I'll take a note in my phone of the item I'm about to buy in the cost. Then I'll decide if I really need it. 87 no.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know, wow. I would say yes every time. I would say where did you want I need it? Yes.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh my God, me. In the last 21 days he saved 3,400, $3,048. That's actually so incredible love that I could see how that could work for a lot of different things.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, if you're like, if you're an indecisive, I'm pretty decisive actually I was thinking about that cuz you wouldn't like Van Cleef. I was thinking last time we did a five second decision and we were in Van Cleef and like they didn't have the matching ones and I was like okay, but I want you to have. I don't know. And it's like. But we had to like either go or like get it or go. And I was like oh, we'll just like get it.

[Trisha Paytas]

You don't.

[Tana Mongeau]

I mean like I was just like at that point I wasn't even waiting. I don't know. I'm pretty.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm like that too actually. It's really funny. I'm very decisive. Even like shopping Mokoa and I actually had like. It wasn't a fight honestly. I was just a to him and I had to apologize and I did, I fully apologize. Like hands and knees. I was just literally a to him. I know we were in London and I had been shopping all day and he really wanted to get a pair of loafers like a nice pair of loafers for himself to like wear when we do carpets. Nice things, nice dinners, nice events. He was like I really want a nice shoe. And so I was like I think you should get a Bota Veneta loafer. Right? And we go in Bottega and my sweet, sweet, sweet angel of a boyfriend could not be more opposite than me when it comes to things like this. He spends the next two hours trying on two different pairs of loads loafers and just deciding and this one's more functional for this but this shoe looks more like this cheaper shoe. So should I just get the cheaper version? Like asking people's opinions what about brown versus black. And after two hours I had racked up like a twenty thousand dollar tab in Bottega because I'm just stuck in the store like things. And then I put everything back. I was like, okay, this is ridiculous. I'm not gonna buy all of these things be just because I did buy that back. But I mean, it's a cute one. It's a cute bag. But I'm. I am like two. Like, I'm just like, I do it now.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And I started being, like, kind of rude. I was like, just pick one.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, it doesn two hours or how long?

[Trisha Paytas]

It was a pretty long time.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's long. That's long.

[Trisha Paytas]

It. It was maybe like an hour and a half. But like, we ended up having this like, really deep, long combo for the next week. About, like, how I am too far this way. That I am just like, impulsively deciding. And he is being like, $2,000 is a lot of money. Like, I'm going to have these for a very long time. And they should be the most functional and the best. Maybe I could be a little faster. Like, our conclusion was that we both need to meet in the middle. I should think about things more and he should. Maybe he can pull the trigger a little faster, but like, communication. It just like.

[Tana Mongeau]

Or like, do it like separately. Yeah. If you don't love to wait.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know, he goes like, on his own time or something.

[Trisha Paytas]

Also, like, I what I need to run to Gucci next door and keep shopping. Like. Like sit and just be in the. You're in Bottega, you're in London. It's be like, he's very leisurely and less like this. And I'm very. My fingers are broken from how much I'm snapping.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, yeah, yeah, yeah, like that.

[Trisha Paytas]

And McCarthy really makes me realize that life should just think about it a little more.

[Tana Mongeau]

This episode is brought to you by Marshalls.

[Trisha Paytas]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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Rumchata.

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Find out [e-mail] Drink responsibly.

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[Tana Mongeau]

All rights reserved.

[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

Because I always find something amazing. Just so many good brands.

[Trisha Paytas]

I get an extra 5% off with my Nordstrom credit card Total queen treatment. Join the Nordy Club at Nordstrom Rack to unlock our best deals. Big gifts, big perks. That's why you rack. Or just slow down.

[Tana Mongeau]

Just.

[Trisha Paytas]

Nothing's gonna happen bad if you go a little slow. Like, I don't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's true. That's true. That's actually good. I used to be actually, yeah, I used to be like that. Like, go, go, go. But, like, kids, like, force you to slow down. Like, you have to slow down because, like, you do not get out of the house in under an hour. Like, you could like, say, we're leaving at 5:30. You have to like, say 4:30, because it takes that long to get shoes on, to go to the bathroom, to get diapers, to fill up the bottle. Like, it just forces you to, like, slow down. So now anything where like, oh, it's like an hour. I'm like, oh, that seems reasonable. Like an hour. You know what I mean? Like, the pumpkin patch, it was like a three hour thing. That should take him like an hour. But, you know, because of kids. Yeah, that body and food and washing hands and getting them out of the. Like, just. It is like, a lot, but it does kind of force you to slow down.

[Trisha Paytas]

And.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, I think that's. Yeah, that's good though. Like, at least you're aware. I think, like, apologizing is such a big thing because.

[Trisha Paytas]

Oh, yeah, I was like, I was a. Like, you didn't know which loafer you wanted. And I was a. Yeah, like, I know, but it taught me a lot.

[Tana Mongeau]

The self awareness is good because I think, like, it happens in the fact that you're, like, aware and because he's.

[Trisha Paytas]

Just so sweet that, like, he's the type of person where if I'm a. I'm like, I was a. Like, like, he's so sweet that I'm like, oh, my God, Tanner, you like, do you want to go hit a puppy next?

[Tana Mongeau]

I know. I'm not gonna even repeat my story. I shared on gestures and the comments came hindsight. I was like, it's a cute little story. I'll share it. Because, like, we just. We had like a. Like, I was being. I was, I was. And I even said it on the thing. I'm like, no, you don't have to Essay. Am I. That I am. Like, I said it on the podcast, and still the comments like, cut that story. Why did you put that out? That's so gross. Like, they were, like, so mad at me. And I was like. And I got it. I got it so completely. Because with Moses does every single thing for me. Every single thing. And the thing I got mad at him for cooks me dinner if I want steak. He's like, I'm gonna cook you a steak. The thing I got mad Madden for was, like, not cooking the steak fast enough to get before sunset so I could eat outside.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

He's like, can you just eat inside? And I was like, no, I can't. And then I just didn't eat it. He's like, but I can't eat inside. I didn't know I was gonna take that long. I was like, nope, I can't. And I was like. And, yeah, like, such a. And I was like. And I always feel bad about it. Like, anything I've ever done.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm, like, crazy. Like, I'm a real crazy person.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, me. Me too. And that's. I was like, wow, There was something, like, wrong with me. I felt bad immediately. I shared the story.

[Trisha Paytas]

And then they're so empathetic, too. They're like, it's okay, babe. Like, we all have bad days.

[Tana Mongeau]

Literally. Moses was like that with the sticky. Literally. The next time, he's like, okay, I'm starting it at noon for you. Like, he was like, amanda, yes. Yeah. But then, meanwhile, Moses literally taking care of everything, including me. And I was like, God, I. And I said the story out of guilt. Like, I said it because it was the next day, and I said it out of guilt because I just felt bad, and I wanted the world to know how amazing he was, even if it made me look like. And me repeating again. People are like, that's a gross story. Don't repeat it. But it was.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, you're real for that. Actually, I don't. I don't think it's. Don't repeat it. Because we have those moments that is something we don't talk about enough, too, is like, when you go from unhealthy relationships to the healthy one. Like, you have moments like that sometimes where it's like, you slip back into. And then it's like, wait, this guy is so good. And it's like, you have to, like, I just did that. We just keep telling stories of, like. Like, being amazing men. It's like, oh, my God, it doesn't happen.

[Tana Mongeau]

That is, like, my like, one or two.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's pretty rare. It's just like, I will, then I'll. Like I said. He was, like, saying that I wanted to book a hotel in Hawaii. And he's like, you literally just bought a place here. Like, you don't.

[Tana Mongeau]

Whatever.

[Trisha Paytas]

I was like, but it's not. The WI Fi wasn't ready. And I was, like, being insane. I was like, I just want a hotel. And then I came back, like, 30 minutes later.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was like, why? We have a place. I. Crazy. But, like, four.

[Trisha Paytas]

I was. I was sobbing.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was like, I am so mean.

[Trisha Paytas]

And, like, I know that. I just walked away. And he was like, God, that week. That week, he asked me dead serious. He was like, are you pregnant? Like, I think you might be pregnant.

[Tana Mongeau]

Because I was being so crazy that, you know, hormonal shifts are very real, though. And again, shout out to the men who get it, because Moses will be that. Like, he'll be like, you know what? Postpartum, your hormones crash, and it's like, even three months later, he's like, it can take up to two years. Like, he's very, very sweet. And, like, I was like, I don't. I don't blame postpartum on that. I'm like, that was just me just having anger issues. And, like. And I. I thought I handled. That's why I share on the podcast. I was like, you know what? I went upstairs. Rather than blowing up at him, I just went upstairs and was silent, you know, because I didn't yell. I didn't scream.

[Trisha Paytas]

But it is.

[Tana Mongeau]

I just share these stories because, like.

[Trisha Paytas]

We'Re so. Like, I'd be like, yeah, and then I went up. Like, I'd be so confident that, like, no one was gonna say some shit.

[Tana Mongeau]

I was. I was like. I controlled myself. I went upstairs to have my fit and not in front of anyone. Like, me having kids downstairs. My mom was there to watch the kids. I went up, and I just screamed in my pillow, like, it just looks so much fun. But I only say that because, like.

[Trisha Paytas]

I. I do think, like, you can.

[Tana Mongeau]

Work on yourself and you can grow and you can, like, really, like, help your mental health, but at the same day, like, mental illness will always be there for me. And, like, you do have to, like, really work at it and control it and regulate it, because it's just, like, it's not okay. I mean, that is not okay to, like, lash out, like, to. To, like, be that way to anybody. But it happens, and it's normal. And I think the best lesson, like, Yours had such a good lesson. Is like communication, apologizing, awareness the best you can. And ultimately, yeah, someone can only take so much. So for me, I'm so hyper aware now. Like it's. It's not. Nothing's that big of a deal. And I know and it was just like weirdly in the moment because I usually don't care. I really let things go. I do have a weird issue with food and stuff like that, but it's just like not that big of a deal. So I was like, honestly, like. Anyways, so you know what I just.

[Trisha Paytas]

Thought about as you were saying that we were just talking about the counting thing and I was like, oh, I don't like that's. I should try that. Whatever I do. Do this thing with Makoa where like this is like me curbing my mental illness.

[Tana Mongeau]

He's.

[Trisha Paytas]

He also speaks at a very low like mokoa. If he's like anything, he'll be like, this drink is really just flavorful and bursting. Like that's how he talks. Like he thinks about everything before he talks and like it's just. It's the Hawaii. Like he speaks at that pace and sometimes I'll be like, you know, like, babe, where's the blank? Or like, you know what I mean? Can you tell me what to do? Do we go on this date to this or this? And he'll be like, well, maybe we should just. And I used to install beginning be like, what?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

And now I have to literally sit there and go, 1, 2, 3. Like in my head I will count to like a full minute before I'm like, I have to cuz I know I'll be. It's like he's just gathering his thoughts, just normally.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. Not everyone just says exactly what's on their mind immediately and gets in trouble. Like you, you're constantly apologizing for the things you say t. Because you don't. You don't think before you speak.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like, right, this man.

[Trisha Paytas]

And like, yeah, I had to.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I used to be like that too. And it's like most of like have other things on his mind or. But what. What were you gonna say? He's like the. And then he's just like literally thinking about something else or texting something else. And I used to get like pissed at him. And meanwhile he's just like texting someone to like repair our roof. And something's like, okay, I need to just like chill too because I'll.

[Trisha Paytas]

I literally will have to count. I'm like, yeah, it's you're so real. The mental illness may always be there, but you have to find the ways to like not take it out on the, the good person and work with.

[Tana Mongeau]

Your own brain backwards from five for other reasons. You're like, this is me just not exploding. 5, 4, 3.

[Trisha Paytas]

I have to count upwards. Yeah. I'm like, no, no, no. Once we get to two minutes, like if he hasn't answered your question, like, like maybe you can say like, babe, what?

[Tana Mongeau]

But that's a beautiful thing though. I do love like the other calmness down of it all and just like not worrying because honestly, what Moses taught me too is like nothing is that serious. Not just our like in that, in that regards like the steak or whatever. But it's like, like you, like if I got mad at something or something or someone online something, I'll get like so mad. And he's just like, it just does not.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. The world keeps spinning like it's. Yes, it is so. But we don't talk about that enough. Like, you know, being a crazy girl and trying to reform because you've met a good person is like a whole journey. You know what I mean?

[Tana Mongeau]

It's never ending journey.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

Because now it's also me being like, I see on Tick Tock so many like wives or like wives will leave the husband and the husband, they'll be like shocked. They'll be like, did we talk about this yesterday?

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't know, but I just love what you're saying.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. And they'll be like, wait, where did that come from? Like a divorce out of nowhere. It's like, yeah, you weren't helping, you weren't like pitching anyone doing anything. And I was like, so I think myself in the opposite way because the woman's like, I did all the cooking, I did all the cleaning, I took care of the kids and I was working and I, I got no appreciation. And that's so like Moses. And of course he knows I appreciate him, but I'm like, I need to be extra, extra appreciative. And not to say I don't do, of course I do stuff too. Like, obviously I like work really hard and I, you know, do stuff with the kids. Like I, I do a lot, but he does do a lot more. And I'm like, I need to be appreciative. So I'm never one of those people who are like, oh, the divorce came out of nowhere. Not that we'd ever get divorced, but you just never know. I'm just like in my mind we'll never be divorced. But then it's like, if it came out of nowhere, you'd be like, oh, it came out nowhere. But did it. Did you appreciate him enough?

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Did you say thank you? Because, like, thank yous go a long way, you know, and things.

[Trisha Paytas]

And for me, lately, it's jobs. It's like, girl get to sucking. Like, oh, I think maybe we were. I. But, like. And I know this is a very Patreon conversation, but it's like, whether you want to or not, this man does everything for you. Get on your knees.

[Tana Mongeau]

That does. That is. That is honestly same. I'm always like, you know what? Like, when he, like, obviously, after the family leaves. Well, if he cooks for, like, my entire family, and my family just, like, goes gaga over there, like, oh, my God, he's the best cook ever. How did you get lucky with such a man? Like, my dad, like, will hype Moses up so much. Hyps up every week and hypes him up so much for his cooking. So when he does that kind of stuff and he'll cook for my. My mom the next day, like, do different fl. Like, variations of steak, well done and medium rare, and I, like, get so horny for it. I'm just like, all right, that was.

[Trisha Paytas]

Pretty busting it open.

[Tana Mongeau]

Please, please stay. Not only are you taking care of me and the kids now, you're doing it for my family. Like, it's so. It's so wild. So, yeah, just be appreciative and have communication and don't be. Try not to be too much.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah. We talk about hating men a lot and dumping them, but if you have a good one and you're working through your own things, like, yes, being a good girlfriend is also very important. You know, that was one of the main reasons I went sober. I was like, I want to be the best version partner for this person. Like, just. Yeah, be a good partner to your partner, too.

[Tana Mongeau]

We don't.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, we don't say that enough.

[Tana Mongeau]

I did not want to embarrass Moses at all. Like, that was my. I always think, too, because when we first date, I was a little messy.

[Trisha Paytas]

Same, same, same. It's like I had to reroute so many ways that I was. Because I was finally with someone that I really respected and, like, didn't want to lose.

[Tana Mongeau]

I didn't want them to get, like, any sort of backlash because of you, because that was like, mo's all of a sudden start people judging him and being like, oh, why are you a judge? You know, 100.

[Trisha Paytas]

It's like, I always think about that. I'm like, you could have easily been with the surfer body.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Problematic surfer body.

[Tana Mongeau]

We were talking about that earlier. You're talking about a celebrity. And I was like, you're like, oh, he would always like date my friends or whatever. I'm like, oh, that's so funny. He like, wouldn't want to date you because you are so like a big personality and obviously like original stuff like that. I just wanted a model what you are. But I know what you were saying.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, like, no, I was. Yeah, we were talking about like comedian. I was like, yeah, he like definitely preferred the like model girl who was quiet. And I was always kind of the friend.

[Tana Mongeau]

Right?

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, I'm certified. I was certified insane. Like, he didn't want that.

[Tana Mongeau]

My favorite part of the story was Tana saying she third wheeled all their dates. Like a couple different people went out with this guy that you knew and you were like, at their dinner. Are you sure?

[Trisha Paytas]

I mean, I think, right. I was always third wheeling Theo von date.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's crazy.

[Trisha Paytas]

But I loved it. Like, I'd be like, my friend would be like hanging out with him, flirting, and then I'd have like an hour conversation with him about like Panera Bread and I'd be like, this is the best thing ever. I actually.

[Tana Mongeau]

That's so weird. I loved it. Did you ever think it was weird? He's like, why is Tana always here?

[Trisha Paytas]

No, because I don't think they were like dating. It's not like, like a romantic like dinner date.

[Tana Mongeau]

It wasn't.

[Trisha Paytas]

It'd be like a random dinner at like an EP and lp or like. Or like, I have a show tonight and like come your friends and then like, we'll all go like to dinner.

[Tana Mongeau]

The three of you.

[Trisha Paytas]

There was one where it was just the three of us, but it, I mean it was so like entertaining. I love the Ovon.

[Tana Mongeau]

Does he like drop like you. Do you guys meet there or is he like, drop you guys off or like.

[Trisha Paytas]

I don't. I think, I think that me and the girl left together. Like, I think he just came met us and then he left.

[Tana Mongeau]

Okay.

[Trisha Paytas]

And then that one I can't like say. I don't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

I love the stories. We live parallel lives. I was showing you there's a comedian that was like a Theo Vaughan, like way back, like literally in the 90s. And I did when I was 18, he was like 50. And I was showing you. I was like, he's still dating like young girls and it was like not the theobana, but we were talking about a different comedian. And we're just like, there's just certain people who will just like never grow out of that, especially comedians. There was like two comedians I told you about that are now in their 60s, still dating young girls, never been married.

[Trisha Paytas]

We were kind of. Because we were talking about the fact that like, I love comedians and like, I used to think that that would be like my dream boyfriend. Like, oh, just like, because I love a funny guy so much. But we were talking about just, just comedy with anyone, like, even me, like wanting to do stand up. I'm not saying like, not, not women too, but like to be a stand up comedian, you're like, I'm so funny. Like, you know what I mean? I'm like, people need to listen to what I have to say. And when a man has that mindset, like, I'm so funny, I'm God. People need to listen to what I have to say. Like, that's why, I don't know, you hear some horror stories about girls dating comedians and then, oh, they were a narcissist.

[Tana Mongeau]

You know, even like Whitney Cummings talks about like male comedians being like, awful.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, I think like Hannah Burner does too.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. I think male comedians, comedians are just awful because they're so narcissistic. Yeah. Because they are so good looking. They are funny and women like funny.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

And they don't know the lore behind.

[Trisha Paytas]

And you know what?

[Tana Mongeau]

Good for them.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, they're thriving. They're living their best life until they're 60.

[Tana Mongeau]

Still dating 24 year olds. I showed the one that I dated when I was 18 and he was like 50 and now he's like 65 dating 18 year olds. And I was like, okay, maybe she was like 25, but still I was like, crazy. Yeah, he looked old. I mean, he looked old. I mean, is that gonna be some of these comedians still, like. And probably.

[Trisha Paytas]

And you know what's funny is he's even on like a higher rung, like par. Like better. I'm saying because he at least is in a committed relationship with one who's like 25.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, we don't know. That was the first time I saw someone on his page. So it could be just.

[Trisha Paytas]

But then like, do you know what I mean? Like, then there's the ones that like literally won't even get in a relationship. That's true. But I claim a girl on their grid, like, men will really be 60 and be like, I can't grid post the other one.

[Tana Mongeau]

I told you about like that. Like, I look to see who he's like dating and he's like never posted somebody, but I know he's always like with a different.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like that's so. It's so sad to me. I don't know.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, they're. They're the worst, but they're funny.

[Trisha Paytas]

So I. And that's the thing I love. Like, I'm such a fan of so many male comedians. It's just like I couldn't. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Like that. No, we've. I think we found.

[Trisha Paytas]

And there are also good ones, you know, that are dating and they're married and they're who.

[Tana Mongeau]

Maybe like a Bert Kreischer.

[Trisha Paytas]

Okay. Bert Kreischer is very married and very.

[Tana Mongeau]

And Segura. Yeah. Old and married is so funny. So I do like that. I like where Crusher does like a kitchen show cooks. I'm like, oh, I want to go in there. Yeah. I actually don't know any of them. I don't know.

[Trisha Paytas]

I think they're friends.

[Tana Mongeau]

I know. I know nothing about it. I just see him cooking for people. I like this. Age appropriate women. Yeah, we like that. Watch. They did jokes or something. I feel like one of them had a joke about like dating younger girls or cheating on their wife or something. I don't know. But maybe not.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yeah, you'll never. It's. It's hard to keep up. Truly. Truly. It's so hard.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wrap it up.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. Do we want to take one call for this episode?

[Tana Mongeau]

Sure.

[Trisha Paytas]

Devin. The executives have suggested a call timestamp.

[Tana Mongeau]

The first call, one hour and an hour. I love it.

[Trisha Paytas]

I'm excited though. Let's take a call.

[Tana Mongeau]

We're in a good mood.

[Trisha Paytas]

Maybe we have some really positive, fun advice.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah, we do.

[Trisha Paytas]

Or I'm gonna get so pissed. Let's see.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, no, it's gonna be good, right? 7.

[Trisha Paytas]

See, I did it again, right?

[Tana Mongeau]

It's gonna be good no matter what.

[Trisha Paytas]

Hi, Trisha and Tana. I love you guys so much. I'm calling because I just got into a huge fight with my best friend of like over 10 years. She got super drunk one night at the bars and pretty much just went off on me saying like all of the worst. She could have said to me, like stuff about my ex boyfriend and pretty much anything that would she knew would cut the deepest. And it's been like three days. She hasn't reached out, she hasn't apologized. And I just want advice on finally.

[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

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[Tana Mongeau]

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[Trisha Paytas]

When you need it the most. Don't miss out. Shop Maytag in store or online. Online today at Lowe's. Like, if I should reach out, if I shouldn't, because I felt like her behavior was really out of line and. But I do understand that she was, like, drinking and stuff, so I don't.

[Tana Mongeau]

Know, I would really love to hear.

[Trisha Paytas]

Your guys's perspective on that. And if, you know, I should be trying to work on this relationship or not. It's been a really long time and I'm really hurt.

[Tana Mongeau]

She literally told me that I was.

[Trisha Paytas]

Useless to the world. There was a lot of things. But just please let me know what you guys think.

[Tana Mongeau]

Thank you.

[Trisha Paytas]

Love you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Wow.

[Trisha Paytas]

I mean, that is heavy. I think fighting with your best friend is like, just, oh, my God. It's. It just. It hurts in a way that, like, a man can't hurt you, you know, it's like, yeah, right? Like, just like a girl hurting you like that, it's like you're like, it's the worst ever. And I feel so bad for this girl. I mean, God, I have so much to say, though. Like, yeah, you should.

[Tana Mongeau]

You should take this one because it involves, like, best friends, which I never had for more than 10 years. It's also involves, like, drinking. And so you kind of know, like, you know what I mean? Like, do you drink? Yeah. Do you forgive if they're drunk or does it not matter? Like, I don't know. I've never been around, like, drunk people like that.

[Trisha Paytas]

I think that people should be held accountable for their actions no matter what. And in this situation, from. From what is given here, I think that you don't necessarily need to reach out. You're hurt. She said hurtful things to you, and she should be accountable for her actions in that way. At the same time, that's your best friend. And try to walk in her shoes and be like, are there some things that maybe I've been doing over the past months or years that maybe she was holding in and she got that liquid courage in her and she let it out. And maybe I could be better in these ways. And maybe the. There's a way you guys can meet in the middle there. You know what I mean? But I also spent a lot of time with girls, too, especially where it's like, people would say up things to me and then I would just forgive them. And, like, just. I don't. Now that I'm older, I'm at this point in my life where I'm like, that is not what friendship is. Like, people do have to be held accountable for the things that they say to you and the way that they treat you. And, like, friendship should feel, like, light and easy and lift you up for the 99%. If this is just the 1%, though, like, Amare and I fight. You know what I mean? Like, we'll have big fight and then, like, we'll. I mean, occasionally, very once in a while, but if that's the case here, where it's like, you guys never fight and this happens, like, I believe in you to work it out, but do.

[Tana Mongeau]

You think, like, if, like, if someone's in the wrong, like, do you wait for them to apologize? What if they don't? What if, like, well, I'm waiting for you to apolog. You just, like, suck it up and just move on? Or do you, like.

[Trisha Paytas]

No, I think it's like, eventually, if she. If I were her, eventually, if I were in her shoes, I would give the other person some time to reach out. She's probably feeling anxiety of a century. That's her punishment. And like, if she didn't, eventually I'd be like, hey, we have to talk, you know? And then, like, let's meet up. Like, I would swallow that pill. I'd be the first one to be like, hey, we have to talk. But, like, when we talk also, like, I'd be like, hey, you. What you said was. Was it true? Do you feel that way? And why? You know what I mean? Like, this hurt me. Like, do you have anything to say about that? Are you sorry or are you not sorry? And, like, if so, why? Like, I think that just, like, yes, I would want to communicate about that and I would initiate that eventually if, like, the person didn't. If I cared about them, you know what I mean, like, if there's a part of you that's like, she's a bad person anyway, and I was waiting for this and like, whatever, then that's a different combo, you know, where it's like, maybe I just don't need this person. Person in my life and this was the ending and whatever. But she's saying it's her best friend.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

So I'm trying to really, like, get there mentally where I'm like, hopefully this was an anomaly and you guys can work through it, you know?

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. You're like, queen of forgiveness. You forget for, like, the craziest things. So I think that's good advice.

[Trisha Paytas]

I think that I am. I'm learning as I get older to be a little less. Not. No, I'll always forgive people because I think that if you don't forgive someone, you hold on to hatred and you harbor it. But I'm much bigger as I'm getting older. I. Boundaries, like, I can forgive you, but, like, maybe I don't want this energy in my life and I'm gonna stand up for that.

[Tana Mongeau]

No, I think your forgiveness is like the best quality about you. Because I was always like, cut someone off immediately for anything. So I think it's like, better to forgive and like I said, maybe like, not have them forgive, not forget. But like, forgive is always good. But like, best friend, like you said 10 years. I mean, I think that's probably.

[Trisha Paytas]

But I definitely, like, I forgave a lot of people where I probably shouldn't have. Like, looking back and like, there's a middle ground there, you know, like, boundaries are important and like, I could have saved myself a lot of, like, pain in my life. I think, by setting better boundaries, you know, it's like, hey, don't black out and talk to me like that. I deserve better than that. Even if I did something wrong, you should communicate it to me healthier because that's where like, I would get really, like, murky. Like, even a situation like this, like, I'd be like, well, if I did something wrong, then I deserve to be talked to like that. And it's like, well, no, no, you know, like, we. We could have communicated this better. And like, I would. You know what mean? I. I mean, like, just throw all boundaries out the window because I. My self worth was so low, you know, and it's like, that's not.

[Tana Mongeau]

And like, how many times this happens, like, repeated behavior, like, is she always doing this when she's drunk? You know, it's like that kind of thing. Like, how much? But if it's like, once in a while, I suppose it's.

[Trisha Paytas]

And if you really did nothing wrong and it's just out of nowhere, like, that is so crazy and painful, and I'm so sorry. And you deserve better than that. And, like, I just. I. There will be another side, no matter what it is. If you guys make up and you're back to being best besties, or if this showed you some true colors and she's really going through it. Like, there are a million solutions to this scenario. And I know it feels like the end of the world right now, but you got this girl, and I mean that.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. Try it.

[Trisha Paytas]

Because life also brings you new friends and new eras that you never even knew to be possible. Like, you never even, like. You know what I mean? Like, the new friends, new scenarios, you being treated great. Like, communicating the way that you deserve. Like, all those things. Life is very long, and there are friendships that I had end that I thought would be the end of my life.

[Tana Mongeau]

And that was good optimism. You said life is very long. I love that because a lot of people say life is short. And I like, the life is very long. There's.

[Trisha Paytas]

There's both. There's truth to both.

[Tana Mongeau]

But, you know, it's like, short in a span. But I love the life is very long hasn't manifested long life. I always am like, can I please live? Like, I would love to live 60 more years. So I'm like, I live 60 more years.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes. It's so true. And just like, all the eras and, like, I don't know, like, life. Life has a lot to offer you. So. Yeah.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah. That's my favorite thing to sing Justin Bieber with that one.

[Trisha Paytas]

It really. We have to end on a believing note.

[Tana Mongeau]

Yeah.

[Trisha Paytas]

Like, that is. I love today's episode.

[Tana Mongeau]

It was so good. So cute. So much positive vibes. Everybody's felt positive vibes through. I love podcasting or doing anything when I'm in a good mood because I think positive vibes, like, radiate to everyone else.

[Trisha Paytas]

I couldn't agree more. I hope everyone's having a good day, focusing on the good in their life and having a fun Halloween month and just living with optimism if you're going through it because there is. There is a light at the end, always.

[Tana Mongeau]

All right. Yeah. Yes.

[Trisha Paytas]

The next episode, Devin is holding us to a challenge, which we're going to have. How. How long? Five minutes to answer each call, and we're going to try to take as many calls as possible. So it's probably going to end in Devin quitting his job. But we're really excited to try. Well, Devin, I literally would die without you. Like, oh, my God.

[Tana Mongeau]

Evans and Devin getting a promotion because it was such a good idea.

[Trisha Paytas]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Tana Mongeau]

We did get Devin a promotion for the year's been up. So he's got. We got. We got a raise, I guess. I don't know what it's called.

[Trisha Paytas]

And we love you.

[Tana Mongeau]

Well, Devin was very nice when we started. He like told me as right and he said, but I can do it for this. And then maybe we can like renegotiate. And he didn't even ask to renegotiate, but I can give it.

[Trisha Paytas]

And then we got. The tinders of the world came to us.

[Tana Mongeau]

Shout out to sponsorships coming through. Because now I'm like, you know what?

[Trisha Paytas]

And thank you guys for always sitting through our sponsorships and using the things that we're sponsored by and stuff. Because it. It keeps not love lying. Love lining.

[Tana Mongeau]

We have a good tender read today too. It's a spirit special Thanksgiving one and.

[Trisha Paytas]

We are very thankful. We will be taking a million calls the next episode and we love you guys. Love you. Bye.

[Tana Mongeau]

Thanks.