Jesse Lally: Setting the Record Straight - Not Skinny But Not Fat

Summary4 min read

Podcast Summary: "Jesse Lally: Setting the Record Straight"

Not Skinny But Not Fat
Host: Amanda Hirsch
Guest: Jesse Lally
Release Date: May 27, 2025

Introduction

In this episode of Not Skinny But Not Fat, Amanda Hirsch welcomes Jesse Lally, a prominent figure from the reality TV show Vanderpump Villa. The conversation delves deep into Jesse's personal life, his portrayal on television, and the controversies surrounding his relationship with his ex-wife, Michelle.

Jesse Lally’s Background and Early Career

Jesse begins by sharing his journey from Boston to New York, where he initially worked in the insurance industry before transitioning into modeling and acting.

Jesse Lally [12:20]: "I did a little bit and then I did that job with Anna Nicole Smith and the rest was history after that."

He details his experience with Anna Nicole Smith, which significantly boosted his visibility and led him to pursue acting more seriously. Jesse trained at the William Esper Studio in New York alongside notable personalities like Amy Schumer.

Jesse Lally [12:46]: "I think you guys are friends."

Eventually, Jesse relocated to Los Angeles in 2006, seeking further opportunities in the entertainment industry despite the challenges posed by the 2006-2007 writer strike.

Relationship Dynamics and Reality TV Portrayal

A significant portion of the discussion centers on Jesse’s tumultuous relationship with Michelle, which has been a focal point on reality TV. Jesse addresses accusations of cheating and his portrayal as a villain on the show.

Jesse Lally [18:25]: "Something I've been working on is taking that pause considering the repercussions on my daughter, on my relationship, on my friendships."

He reflects on his past behavior, including using derogatory terms towards Michelle, and expresses regret over his actions.

Jesse Lally [20:01]: "I don't believe in cheating. I think cheating is a quitter mentality. I think it's a victim mentality."

Jesse emphasizes his efforts to take accountability and improve his behavior, highlighting his work with a coach to manage his triggers and anger.

Jesse Lally [22:07]: "I'm wildly authentic and I just never wanted to worry about it with me."

Current Relationship and Co-Parenting

Jesse discusses his current relationship with his girlfriend, detailing how they navigated entering a new relationship amid ongoing media scrutiny and their shared responsibilities as co-parents to their daughter, Isabella.

Jesse Lally [38:41]: "We started dating in February. So it was about, what, six months after."

He elaborates on their co-parenting schedule, ensuring that Isabella maintains a healthy relationship with both parents despite the complexities introduced by reality TV.

Jesse Lally [61:39]: "We are doing every other weekend and then two days on, two days off during the week."

Interactions with Other Cast Members

The conversation touches upon Jesse’s relationships with other members of the Vanderpump Villa cast, including Kristen and Luke, fostering positive connections despite previous tensions.

Jesse Lally [54:03]: "Shockingly, probably Kristen and Luke."

He also addresses conflicts with Janet and Brittany, emphasizing his intent to maintain amicable relationships despite challenges on the show.

Jesse Lally [56:35]: "I see that play out with a lot of people throughout the season."

Financial Management and Lifestyle

Jesse addresses accusations regarding his spending habits, particularly concerning wine purchases. He clarifies that his expenditures are often misrepresented and highlights his genuine passion for wine, alongside his disciplined approach to finances.

Jesse Lally [63:30]: "It's a way to control a narrative to, you know, it completely one sided."

He recounts significant purchases, such as high-end wines and memorable trips with his family, asserting that these investments were made to create lasting memories.

Jesse Lally [66:25]: "I don't regret any dollar I spend on my family."

Handling Public Perception and Media Narratives

Jesse reflects on the challenges of being portrayed negatively on reality TV and his strategies to counteract the narrative. He emphasizes his commitment to authenticity and transparency, distancing himself from the scripted image often crafted for television.

Jesse Lally [76:10]: "It's very Team Jesse."

He notes the surprising support he has received from fans, attributing it to his genuine approach and willingness to take responsibility for his actions.

Personal Reflections and Future Outlook

Throughout the episode, Jesse offers introspective insights into his personal growth and the lessons learned from his experiences both on and off the camera. He expresses optimism about future seasons and the possibility of further resolving past conflicts.

Jesse Lally [75:50]: "I think you'll be very surprised. I think, you know, it's there, there."

Amanda encourages Jesse to continue his path of self-improvement, highlighting the importance of accountability and genuine relationships.

Conclusion

Amanda wraps up the episode by thanking Jesse for his openness and forthcoming discussion. She expresses anticipation for future developments in both Jesse’s personal life and his ongoing narrative on reality TV.

Notable Quotes

Jesse Lally [20:01]: "I don't believe in cheating. I think cheating is a quitter mentality."
Jesse Lally [22:07]: "I'm wildly authentic and I just never wanted to worry about it with me."
Jesse Lally [63:30]: "It's a way to control a narrative to, you know, it completely one sided."
Jesse Lally [76:10]: "It's very Team Jesse."

Final Thoughts

This episode offers listeners an in-depth look at Jesse Lally’s side of the story, providing context to the controversies surrounding him. Jesse’s candidness about his mistakes and his efforts towards personal growth present a more nuanced perspective than what is often seen on reality television.

For those unfamiliar with Jesse or the Vanderpump Villa drama, this episode serves as a comprehensive introduction to his character, motivations, and the complexities of balancing personal life with public scrutiny.

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Transcript485 lines

[00:00]
Amanda Hirsch
You guys, big news. Estrall Tequila is the new house tequila for dear media and thus for me, Amanda, and this podcast, not skinny but not fat. I love this tequila so much. It's made from 100% agave. Like, this is what you should be drinking all. All girlies. And when you decide to drink alcohol, you want to be drinking this tequila. Austral. I highly recommend it. I've been making my skinny margs with it. It comes out delicioso. Okay. It is smooth, it has citrus notes. It's just delicious. And you feel better drinking it, believe you me. The other thing I love about Austral is that they give back. Obsessed with the fact that they give back. It makes me feel better about drinking. What they do is with the leftover agave, they upcycle it into something called adobe and that helps build homes for people in need in Jalisco, Mexico. So. So. And that's where the tequila is made. So I love that. I love a tequila that gives back and I also love it because it's delicious, it's affordable, it's great tasting, and it mixes beautifully with any cocktail, but especially a margarita. So stock up this summer and make it your go to for get togethers, whether you're hosting or keeping it casual for a couple of friends. House marg summer is here. It's time to stock up. Go to www.australa.com that's that's spelled a S T R A L Tequila T E Q u I l a.com to find a straw near you. Don't forget the limes, you guys. And please enjoy responsibly. A straw tequila. 40% alcohol per volume. Diageo, New York, New York.
[01:46]
Jesse Lally
The following podcast is a Dear Media production.
[01:49]
Amanda Hirsch
Welcome back to the Not Skinny but Not Fat podcast. I'm your host, Amanda Hirsch, and I still can't believe that I get to chat with some of my favorite stars on my very own podcast where you'll feel like you're just talking with your best friends in your living room. Hey, guys. I. I don't know. I think the return of my period after 10, 11 months has just thrown me off because I was raging before I got it and then I forgot how it is. It's like you have that week before your period where you're psycho and you're achy and you're gross. Then you have the week of your period that your psycho aching gross. And then you have the week after your period that your psycho aching grows. And then you have like one week where you're Maybe not one of those things. So I'm loving it and breathing it, but at the same time, I do. I know it's so annoying to put things into perspective, but when you do complain about your period and there are people, people who are, like, going through perimenopause or menopause or whatever, they're like, I wish I got my period. And you're like, I get it. I get it. Because hormones suck when they change. So I get it. So I'm not going to complain. Also, I did want to get my period back because it felt like a long time. And it did feel like something is in balance. Like, if I'm not getting my period, even though it's completely normal, especially if you're breastfeeding, it did feel like, wait, my body's like out of whack still. Like, it needs to get back in line.
[03:25]
Jesse Lally
So.
[03:25]
Amanda Hirsch
So. So anyway, that's on that. But the reason why I say that is it's part of me recording this intro is just because I literally. I was gonna talk to you guys about, like, what I should do for my birthday because we're going away next week. This week, actually, we're going away today for listening on Tuesday. We're going away today till Friday, and then my birthday's on Saturday. So I was like, gh. I don't know. Like, should I even do anything? Should I even celebrate with friends? Like, should I? Then I was thinking, like, maybe I should, like, be a grownup and just, like, do something for me myself out for my birthday. Like, I was like, I don't like anything. I don't like facials. I don't like massages. Like, I just don't like anything. Should I buy myself something? What do I want? Like, I don't know. And then that really, like, makes you think about what you want and, like, if you know yourself and what. Who are you, Amanda? So then I'm spinning about that. And then it's so funny because I was trying to talk to your own about. And then you ask why I call him Huz. It's because when I say your own, it just feels weird to me. And I tried to talk to him about what I should do for my birthday, and then he was, like, getting weird. And then I was like, are you playing me a huge surprise? And he started laughing and he was like, no. Like, stop. Don't expect that. Are you crazy? And then I was like, kind of sus. Because I was like, he just won't discuss it with me. So, like, that is Weird. And then right now I was, like, asking him about our flight details and he was like, wait, I don't see, like, where it is. So I, like, went into his email and then boom, I saw, like, what he's planning for me. And that sucks. Like, I really didn't want to see that. And I'm blaming him for it because I'm like, why are you an idiot? You can just fucking tell me our flight fucking info. Like, I had to go and look for it. So then I saw it got ruined for me. So I'm upset about it and might have been on the verge of tears about it, and that might be dramatic, but it's like, oh, like somebody was going to do something for you and you saw it because you, you know, need to check everything. Like, he couldn't double check because. Or think, like, wait, let me just answer her about this so she doesn't go look and, like, find the thing anyway. It'll still be great. But I saw what I saw and you can't take it back, you know? And I feel like that's always me. I always find out about it and I always know about it, which is, like, annoying. Speaking about gifts, I did post Instagram the. The gift he got me for Mother's Day, which was atrocious. And I'm so glad so many of you agreed with me because some people try make me feel bad. Like, oh, he tried. I was like, did he try or did he get a targeted Facebook ad that he clicked on and entered the boys names and checked out? You know, which probably is what happened because I got a bunch of messages from you guys. I got the same exact gift, which is so funny, but it's just like, I really rather get nothing or just get flowers or just like, say, happy Mother's Day or just like, just the regular stuff. Also, I'm really not big on the Hallmark holidays. Like, I know we celebrate them. The Valentine's Day, the Mother's Day, the Father's Day, which we won't celebrate this year. No, I'm just kidding. No, we won't, actually. It's just like, to me, it's not that meaningful. Like, my birthday is more meaningful to me, like, those kinds of days. But obviously if you're gonna get me something ridiculous, like, you're gonna get called out on it. Okay. You're gonna. You're gonna. Anyway, before we get into this week's episode, I am so obsessed right now with the secret lives of Mormon wives. Like, I am just, wow, like, what a good reality. Show killing it. The girls are crazy. The drama is insane. Like, the teams are teaming, the hair is herring, and I'm just. It's just so good. And by the way, a lot of you are thinking I'm slow on it. I am. You would die, actually. And here's the tea. I got the screeners months in advance. Okay. I could have seen this three months ago, probably. And guess who waits to watch it after you already did? Me. First of all, I have this thing where, like, I don't like watching screeners that far in advance. Like, I want to be part of the movement. Like, I want to be in the moment with everyone. Like, I don't know if it's fomo. It's like, the opposite of fomo. It's like getting to enjoy something before everybody else does. And I, like, don't want to. It's, like, weird. So weird therapy. Anyway, let's shoot, shoot, shoot right in. Shoot right into today's episode, which is with the Bravo. I don't want to say villain. He's not a villain to me. He does have villainous. Does want to have the opportunity to explain. And, you know, I am the place for some toxy Bravo men. Just kidding. Am I? No. Jesse Lally is here now. I've wanted to talk to Jesse since the show came out. I literally found him so intriguing from day one. Like, he's an intriguing guy. And then that was before, you know, it turned into this divorce war. He said, she said. He's really painted out to be this, you know, awful guy. And he doesn't help himself in a lot of these scenes and episodes on the Valley where he calls her A. And Michelle, that is. And he does have this, like, moment. But I do see something in him. I did see something in him all along. I'm like, you could vibe, like, let's. Let's get. Let's get to the root of this. You need to. You have some answers to give us about, you know, the things that Michelle is saying that you said and did, plus the things that we saw you say and do. And he is here today. So enjoy my episode with Jesse Lally. Can't wait to hear what you think. Jesse Lally's here.
[08:57]
Jesse Lally
I'm excited.
[08:58]
Amanda Hirsch
I'm excited, too.
[08:59]
Jesse Lally
It's been a long time.
[09:00]
Amanda Hirsch
It's been a long time. So we were talking about this before we started that.
[09:04]
Jesse Lally
We talked about you coming on even before that. I will tell you that. I don't know if it was something Jax posted when him and I reconnected you started following me when I had, like 500 followers. So, like, you see who follows you. And then you unfollowed me and then you started following me again.
[09:23]
Amanda Hirsch
This is how rumors start. That's a lie. This is. I've been following the Valley. I've been Valley this fake news.
[09:30]
Jesse Lally
I have been following you for a very long time. So I would notice when you follow me.
[09:36]
Amanda Hirsch
First of all, I'm going to follow you right after this pod.
[09:38]
Jesse Lally
I think you follow me, don't you? I hope so. That would be so fucked up if you don't follow me.
[09:46]
Amanda Hirsch
Why do you take it this seriously?
[09:48]
Jesse Lally
I Now I. Now I. I take it seriously.
[09:50]
Amanda Hirsch
You take Instagram seriously?
[09:52]
Jesse Lally
No, I take not skinny, but off that seriously.
[09:54]
Amanda Hirsch
But I really think it's fake news. And I feel like Justin Bieber when, like, he accidentally unfollowed Haley and then he said it was a glitch and nobody believed him. That's me right now.
[10:02]
Jesse Lally
Oh, perfect. Yeah, Glitchy. I like that.
[10:04]
Amanda Hirsch
I'm Justin Bieber.
[10:05]
Jesse Lally
Okay.
[10:06]
Amanda Hirsch
But I will follow you right after this pod. And we've talked about you coming on the pod.
[10:09]
Jesse Lally
We have.
[10:10]
Amanda Hirsch
And here you are.
[10:11]
Jesse Lally
Here I am.
[10:12]
Amanda Hirsch
Even before the season came out, I was like, this time. Yeah, we're going to make it happen.
[10:15]
Jesse Lally
And I.
[10:15]
Amanda Hirsch
Even when I didn't know what the fuck you were going to do this season. Okay. I was like, I didn't know what. What we're going to see this season.
[10:22]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. And I said I wanted to do it live in New York.
[10:25]
Amanda Hirsch
Right.
[10:25]
Jesse Lally
I don't come back here that much since. Since I moved to L. A. So I didn't want to do it over. Zoom. And here we are. Live in New York. Live in Canal Street. Hasn't changed at all. He just offered me a Prado purse.
[10:36]
Amanda Hirsch
What did you say?
[10:38]
Jesse Lally
I was like, no, I'm not okay.
[10:40]
Amanda Hirsch
Have you ever bought fake stuff?
[10:41]
Jesse Lally
I have not. No.
[10:42]
Amanda Hirsch
Really? Never?
[10:43]
Jesse Lally
Never ever? Yeah, never ever.
[10:46]
Amanda Hirsch
And like, non branded stuff, like Gap chinos.
[10:50]
Jesse Lally
No, I don't buy a lot. Like, I don't. I'm not a shopper. I'm like a traveler and a wine drinker. I don't spend money on, you know, like, custom pants and a Zara sweater. That's.
[11:01]
Amanda Hirsch
I mean, custom pants, though.
[11:02]
Jesse Lally
I know, but I have to, like, suits don't fit me off the rack. Oh, hockey player legs, you know, so.
[11:08]
Amanda Hirsch
What are hockey player legs? Like, thick?
[11:11]
Jesse Lally
These? Yeah.
[11:12]
Amanda Hirsch
So did you play hockey?
[11:13]
Jesse Lally
I did, yeah. Oh, my whole life.
[11:15]
Amanda Hirsch
So that's how you get those Legs.
[11:16]
Jesse Lally
That's. Yeah.
[11:17]
Amanda Hirsch
If anyone's wondering.
[11:18]
Jesse Lally
If anyone's wondering. Yeah.
[11:20]
Amanda Hirsch
And you love the crop with the little loafer. I signature move.
[11:23]
Jesse Lally
Sockless.
[11:24]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah, always sockless.
[11:26]
Jesse Lally
It's. I'm in a sockless phase right now. But I, I've. I have, yeah, I have been a sock guy for, you know, my earlier career.
[11:34]
Amanda Hirsch
So let's talk about it. Cuz you lived in New York, you said? Yeah, for a while.
[11:37]
Jesse Lally
I moved here in early 2002 and I moved to LA late 2006. So four and a half years here in New York.
[11:46]
Amanda Hirsch
Was that post college?
[11:47]
Jesse Lally
It was post college. I actually was working in Boston at New York life insurance and my best friend that I grew up with was a model here in New York and he's like, come to New York and try modeling. And I transferred from the Boston office to the New York office and had my long hair and I would go to the office in a suit with a ponytail and let it down and go on castings. When you used to carry a book around and go from casting, casting. So.
[12:13]
Amanda Hirsch
So did you get jobs?
[12:14]
Jesse Lally
I did a little bit and then I did that job with Anna Nicole Smith and the rest was history after that.
[12:21]
Amanda Hirsch
So wait, why was the rest history? So you had a thing with Anacole Smith? You said this on another podcast.
[12:25]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, yeah, some. Somebody finally brought it up after season one and yeah, I did. That job was a pretty big job. I had a huge billboard in Times Square that was really cool for a 23 year old. And then I got back from Miami shooting that and I was like, I really want to get into acting. So I started studying William Esper studio here in New York. Amy Schumer was in my class.
[12:47]
Amanda Hirsch
Really?
[12:47]
Jesse Lally
I think you guys are friends.
[12:48]
Amanda Hirsch
Did you vibe with her?
[12:49]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, yeah, we were in class for two years and remained friends for a while after that. And yeah, and then I, I just got an opportunity to move to la. And.
[12:58]
Amanda Hirsch
What do you mean an opportunity? Was it a job thing? Like it was.
[13:01]
Jesse Lally
I got a couple agen that were interested in meeting with me, so I went to LA, met with them and then decided to move two weeks before the 0607 writer strike. So business kind of halted when I got out there, but I still loved it out there.
[13:16]
Amanda Hirsch
Is there anyone in LA who didn't try to be an actor model ever?
[13:20]
Jesse Lally
I'm sure there are a few.
[13:22]
Amanda Hirsch
Is there anyone on your show that hasn't?
[13:24]
Jesse Lally
I don't think Jason ever had Jason. He went to Boston College and I forget where he went to law school, but. Yeah, I don't think I. I know. Luke certainly did, right? Yeah, but.
[13:35]
Amanda Hirsch
And he was the one that. The only one that got out to fix that van that was breaking down.
[13:41]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, I got out. I just don't. I didn't.
[13:45]
Amanda Hirsch
You got out?
[13:45]
Jesse Lally
I just don't know even how to open the hood of a car.
[13:49]
Amanda Hirsch
What is. I mean.
[13:50]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, so, yeah, I. I hired like a handyman to hang photos in my house.
[13:56]
Amanda Hirsch
Even photos, Jesse.
[13:57]
Jesse Lally
I mean, I can do it, but it's like.
[13:59]
Amanda Hirsch
Can you drill?
[14:01]
Jesse Lally
I have a drill.
[14:01]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay.
[14:02]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, I cannot drill, but I got a drill for Christmas last year from. From my parents. That was nice.
[14:08]
Amanda Hirsch
Oh, did. Was that maybe a hint from them to start doing around the house?
[14:12]
Jesse Lally
Start drilling. I. I don't even know how to find a stud, so, you know, stud.
[14:16]
Amanda Hirsch
If it's called that.
[14:17]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. Well, speaking of studs, I can't believe I'm following up Josh Du Mel.
[14:21]
Amanda Hirsch
I know.
[14:21]
Jesse Lally
That's insane.
[14:23]
Amanda Hirsch
I know.
[14:23]
Jesse Lally
It's a good looking guy.
[14:24]
Amanda Hirsch
He really is. You know how old he is?
[14:26]
Jesse Lally
No.
[14:26]
Amanda Hirsch
52 or 3.
[14:28]
Jesse Lally
Really? I just turned 45.
[14:29]
Amanda Hirsch
You look great too. Told you that when you walked in.
[14:32]
Jesse Lally
Thank you.
[14:32]
Amanda Hirsch
How does it feel? How's it. Does the body feel? 45? 25.
[14:36]
Jesse Lally
Body feels. Body feels 65. Yeah, it's like, you know, I blew out. I get a torn labrum now, so I. You know, it's like everything you. You go to physical therapy for this and then your hip goes out.
[14:48]
Amanda Hirsch
Really?
[14:49]
Jesse Lally
And it's like from doing stuff. Like, I think I tore my labrum, my right shoulder. Taking Isabella out of the back seat when she was in, like a car seat.
[14:56]
Amanda Hirsch
She's so sweet. I loved seeing her on this last episode when she like, called Michelle and she was like, well, this was episode six and she was like, get me my backpack. Was it? She wanted something for her shoe. Something.
[15:12]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[15:13]
Amanda Hirsch
And she has such a tude. I am obsessed.
[15:16]
Jesse Lally
Right?
[15:16]
Amanda Hirsch
And she looks like you. I think it's.
[15:18]
Jesse Lally
It's straight down the middle.
[15:20]
Amanda Hirsch
Really?
[15:21]
Jesse Lally
Either they 100 looks like me. 100 looks like Michelle. There's nobody that's like, oh, I can see both you.
[15:27]
Amanda Hirsch
Maybe you're like, eyelashes. She has like.
[15:29]
Jesse Lally
She has my eyelashes? Yeah, she has your eyelashes, like big curly ones.
[15:32]
Amanda Hirsch
Right.
[15:32]
Jesse Lally
And yeah, we fight about the nose and the lips a little bit. I think. I think she looks like me. And she's definitely getting a little sassy like me. So.
[15:40]
Amanda Hirsch
I mean, Michelle has some sass too.
[15:41]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, well, she's not, you know, I mean, I. I joke that, like, Isabella is turning into me. And I'm sure Michelle loves that because she is. She's become so smart and so quick.
[15:52]
Amanda Hirsch
How old is she?
[15:53]
Jesse Lally
She just turned five. Yeah.
[15:55]
Amanda Hirsch
I mean, my son is going to turn five. And, like, I was like, whoa, Noah's not. You know, I had a moment where I was like, damn, Isabelle's advanced. You know, she. Girls have that, though. Like, I feel like it's a girl thing.
[16:06]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. And it's like. Like a funny story. So my girlfriend has a daughter that's a couple of years younger. We go to her house, and Isabella is like, I want to get a lollipop. And my girlfriend says, oh, you know, she had two lollipops today. And they go into the pantry and they get lollipops. And Isabelle is like, you didn't say she couldn't have a lollipop. You said she had two lollipops today. And I'm like, that is me.
[16:30]
Amanda Hirsch
That is, like, pushing buttons and, like, finding the loopholes.
[16:34]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, yeah. Negotiating.
[16:35]
Amanda Hirsch
Like, going to be a lawyer.
[16:37]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[16:37]
Amanda Hirsch
Wow.
[16:38]
Jesse Lally
So good luck, Michelle.
[16:40]
Amanda Hirsch
And you.
[16:41]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, well.
[16:42]
Amanda Hirsch
Or you feel like you're equipped? You feel like you're equipped?
[16:44]
Jesse Lally
No, no. I'm 100% in trouble. Like, she is going to end up dating, like, somebody like me, God forbid, and then.
[16:52]
Amanda Hirsch
Forbid. That's how you see it.
[16:54]
Jesse Lally
I mean. I mean, she'll figure it out. She's a smart girl.
[16:57]
Amanda Hirsch
I'm sure she will. And sometimes girls do the opposite. By the way, she might go for, like, a nerdy, like, where, you know, she's the. Runs the show. They don't answer her back. So I'm not worried about her. But I'm interested in you saying God forbid. Do you wait? And you said your. Your girlfriend. This girlfriend now is not the same girlfriend that we're talking about on the show, or is it same?
[17:19]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[17:20]
Amanda Hirsch
Oh, so you.
[17:20]
Jesse Lally
We've been together. Yeah. Like, over a year.
[17:23]
Amanda Hirsch
So you got back together?
[17:24]
Jesse Lally
We. There was sort of like, we've always been together, but, like, you know, the show is very difficult on somebody who's not part of the world. And I think. I think we've navigated it really well, but it's difficult. It's like, you know, you talk about these things while they're happening in real time. And then we watched them all because we did the reunion so. So early. And then now we're watching them, you know, in real time with everybody else. So you're, like, living these things three different times, and same thing with, you know, last season, it's like we started dating, and season one hadn't even premiered yet. And then here we were watching it together, and she's like, oh, I've never noticed that about you, but now I see it, and it's, it's just.
[18:03]
Amanda Hirsch
So do you watch together?
[18:04]
Jesse Lally
We do, yeah. Yeah.
[18:06]
Amanda Hirsch
Does she give you a hard time seeing some of the stuff?
[18:09]
Jesse Lally
I mean, I give myself a hard time because you watch it and you're like, God, that was a year ago. Like, I couldn't even imagine myself doing some of these things a year later.
[18:20]
Amanda Hirsch
What changed that today you wouldn't call Michelle a whore?
[18:25]
Jesse Lally
Consideration. Something I've been working on. Like, my 2025, you know, list of things that I wanted to work on is taking that pause considering the repercussions on my daughter, on my relationship, on my friendships. And, you know, I've really tried to work towards, like, reconciling with friends that I might, might have, you know, had issues with and stuff like that. So I think consideration was, was a big factor in, in looking back at 2024, 2023, calling Michelle a whore.
[18:58]
Amanda Hirsch
Do you think that it's hard for me to say that word? Do you know? Yeah, it's a hard word to say, and I can say. And I can say words, but do you think it's all stemming from, at the end of the day, you believing that she cheated? Her admitting to cheating just with a kiss? Right, right. Hearing from Kristen on season one, that whole drama that she had a boyfriend for a year or something while you were together, at the end of the day, do you think that's. You maybe haven't dealt with all those feelings, and it's coming out as, like, this anger. Still accusing her of things like, did you get closure on that? Like, here we're having a conversation, you cheated on me in this way, she's like, how do you, how do we get closure for you guys where, like, you can both move on and not have this anger?
[19:45]
Jesse Lally
You know, I think that's one of those things, like lying, cheating. It's like one of those things that kind of rolls out, you know, I, I, it's, it's like that aggressive east coast thing. And, you know, I, I've said over and over again, Michelle has this way of getting under my skin.
[20:01]
Amanda Hirsch
She triggers you?
[20:02]
Jesse Lally
Oh, big time. And, you know, cheating. There are, like, certain words that are triggers for me. Loser, cheater. Because I don't believe in cheating. I think cheating is a quitter mentality. I think it's a victim mentality. Like, you give up on your relationship when you cheat. You know what I mean? You don't. You don't realize, like, oh, what is my part in what's happened to the relationship? What's his or her part in the relationship? And how can we each work to get to the middle? A cheater is just a quitter. They're like, you know what? I'm not even going to work on it. I'm just going to go cheat.
[20:36]
Amanda Hirsch
If she broke up with you, would that be better than cheating?
[20:40]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[20:40]
Amanda Hirsch
Your ego would handle that better.
[20:42]
Jesse Lally
100%. Yeah. And Michelle on that rooftop said to me, she was like, there is no way. All those times you were going out for lunches, you didn't. You didn't cross the line or cheat. And the second she said that, I was like, you're the only lying, cheating. And it was just a trigger thing. It. It's a. It's like a weak mindset thing. But I was triggered, and I said it, and I regret it. It was so dumb.
[21:04]
Amanda Hirsch
The thing is, like, I feel like you could get the same point across without saying that, you know, like, you could say, you know, there's a saying in Hebrew that's like. It says, on the head of the thief, the hat burns. Which means if she's saying that, that means maybe she was doing that, which is what you felt in that moment. So I'm saying you could have said maybe that's what you were doing. But I've never done that. Boom. You put her. You said what you wanted to say. You know what I mean? I feel like those words even take away from the point you're making.
[21:34]
Jesse Lally
Right? And you'll see in. In the next episode. I did some work with Scott, my coach, and one of the things he says is, you know, she put me in this position to now be the devil and to be in defensive mode. And, you know, instead of being triggered and going into the devil mode, like, like, you said, be like, look, don't project onto me. You did this. I accept it.
[22:01]
Amanda Hirsch
You're, like, giving her what she thinks she's gonna get in more. You're like, you wanted the Jesse being a dick show. Here it is.
[22:07]
Jesse Lally
Here it is.
[22:08]
Amanda Hirsch
I'm the dick 100. But why did you lean in? Because you're a smart guy. You know, you're on the Valley. You care about what people think. Like, why are you leaning into the. Like, did that cross your mind? Wait, I'm gonna look like a dick on tv? Like, maybe I shouldn't say that. Or were you really not thinking of the cameras, the repercussions?
[22:27]
Jesse Lally
I never think about the cameras, the repercussions. I am like wildly authentic and I just never wanted to. You know, we had a pre production meeting at the beginning of the season and showrunner was like, look, you know, what happened on Vanderpump was people started reading too much and they were acting for what the audience wanted on, you know, Reddit and all these things. And I was like, look, you don't have to worry about that with me. Like, maybe some of the girls. I know Michelle was very intensely obsessed with the comments and, and how she was portrayed towards the end of season one. And I was like, I don't read anything. Like, I. The last time I was on Reddit was two days before season one premiere. And I don't read the comments on Instagram and, and, but you know, this season it's like you start to read things and it makes you laugh more than it breaks your heart. But I don't ever think about. I just kind of like live the way that I live, you know, I should probably start thinking about it.
[23:27]
Amanda Hirsch
Maybe you should start.
[23:28]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, I should do a checklist of like, don't say whore, don't say hooker, don't. Yeah.
[23:32]
Amanda Hirsch
We'll be right back after the break. Okay, listeners, this is not a drill. Roback just launched a brand new product and brought back two of our absolute faves. And you need them in your summer wardrobe. First up, the era high rise shorts. These just dropped and they are everything. They're high rise, they are super lightweight and they are ridiculously good looking and flattering. Whether you're going on a hot girl walk, heading up to pilates or just doing errands. But you want to look like you worked out. These are your go to, okay? You're going to be living in them. Also, the Birdie Blue is here. So Robeck just released this new stunning color in the Sydney Skort. We love a squirt. And in the everyday active dress, and let me tell you, it's the ultimate shade for summer. Birdie Blue. It looks so good with a tan. Like I cannot handle it. And the Sydney Squirt just continues to be a fave. It's sporty, it's cute, it's actually functional. Built in shorts, check. Pockets, check. And the waistband, well, it's double knit. It snatches you in and it does not fall down. It gives main character energy. All dizzle. And the everyday active dress is obsessed. It's the perfect I worked out, but I also have brunch plans. Dress it's breathable, it's flattering, and it's easy to throw on and go. Use the code amanda on a roback.com and you'll get a generous 20% off your first order through the end of this week. That's spelled roback R H O b a c k.com and use my code Amanda. Exciting day everybody. Simply has launched a new prebiotic soda. You guys know that I love sodas and I love ones that come with a little something extra. It's not just good, but there's a prebiotic in it, right? So Simply Pop is the new juicy soda. There are five flavors. Pineapple, Mango, Yum Yum Lime, Strawberry, Citrus Punch Yum Yum and Fruit Punch. This is made with real fruit juice. Simply Pop supports gut health important and has 6 grams of prebiotic fiber, no added sugar and is sweetened with juices Monk Fruit Extract. This supports immune health with zinc plus vitamin C. Amazing. Simply Pop is flavor that pops. See what all the fizz is about? Simply Pop is the new juicy soda that happens when you combine the delicious real fruit flavors of simply with 6 grams of prebiotic fiber to support gut health. Go to coke URL.com/simply pop to find out where you can try Simply Pop. Find Simply Pop and any of its five juicy flavors by visiting them online at Coke URL.com/simply pop. That's Coke C O K e u r l.com/s I m P L Y P O P. You guys know how much I love Hulu. All of my favorite shows are on Hulu. Hulu is the place to go to for your reality tv. Hulu gets real. You love reality tv, right? You know every star, every scandal, every tear and every triumph. You know who else knows reality? Hulu, that's who. They've been leaning into the reality world. And I'm obsessed, right? The Kardashians, the secret lives of Mormon wives. Got to get out. Vanderpump Villa and more. Hulu has reality TV covered. If you're into glamour and romance, things are heating up on Hulu. Catch new seasons of Project Runway and Bachelor in paradise this summer. Yes, it's back and coming soon. Catch the all new reality series Love Thy Nader starring the Nader sisters. Obsessed. Plus, don't miss an all new season of Love Island UK streaming only on Hulu. Hulu gives us reality, you guys. There's so much great reality on Hulu, it's almost too real. Next time you need your reality TV? Go to Hulu. Hulu gets real.
[27:49]
Jesse Lally
Hi, I'm Dr. Will Cole. As a leading functional medicine practitioner, I have had the unique position to see so many alchemize their pain and health problems to their purpose. Now I want the same for you. This podcast is the manifesto for a new breed of health seekers where there is a fresh infusion of grace and lightness into wellness. This is the art of being well. Join me every Thursday for a new episode.
[28:19]
Amanda Hirsch
And we're back. Okay, so the bottom line is she admits to cheating with a kiss one time.
[28:26]
Jesse Lally
Right.
[28:26]
Amanda Hirsch
Do you still to this day think it was more.
[28:28]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. And she admitted to, to that before we started filming, a friend of ours did kind of an intervention where we went in with five things we wanted to clear up before we started filming. And you know, she, the first thing for her was, you cannot say that I was cheating with Aaron, her boyfriend. And my friend looked at her and was like, but you did cheat. And she got like pink faced and she was like, yeah, I did. I started seeing this guy, but we only kissed. And we all said like, that's the appetizer without the entree. Like, yeah, you don't date somebody and, and just kiss once, you know, so what, what it is doesn't matter anymore. You know, we're a year and a, I mean a year plus past that, so.
[29:11]
Amanda Hirsch
But it wasn't Aaron. You believe that at this point?
[29:13]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, but the thing about Aaron that really bothered me, you'll see it play out in season towards the end was, you know, Aaron admits to me that they used to meet up and he would ask advice on girls he was dating and Michelle would ask advice about me. And that for married woman with a newborn is like, would you go to Central park and ask for advice on your marriage to a single 35 year old guy? It's inappropriate.
[29:37]
Amanda Hirsch
And you didn't know about these things?
[29:38]
Jesse Lally
I didn't know.
[29:39]
Amanda Hirsch
But how, like what was your marriage like before the show? Were you, you worked together?
[29:44]
Jesse Lally
We worked together, yeah.
[29:45]
Amanda Hirsch
Did she know your schedule? You knew her schedule? So was she lying about where she was or was she not telling you or.
[29:52]
Jesse Lally
No, I mean, I don't really question somebody's loyalty and you know it. I was never like, oh, where are you going tonight with the girls? So if, you know, she admitted that she was going out with girlfriend of hers and they met these two guys and they started dating. They each started dating these.
[30:09]
Amanda Hirsch
While she was married to you?
[30:10]
Jesse Lally
While she was married. And so she admitted to that and Then the Aaron thing, it was like, you know, when we had Isabella, she would go on these walks every single morning. It was like her thing. And then as Isabella got a little older, I would stay home with Isabella and she would go hiking and I would ask her if I could go. And she's like, why? I'm just gonna listen to music. And, you know, those little hints started to add up over time. And, you know, then it comes out that she was going and meeting up with this guy and they were just friends, but they would have these inappropriate conversations and. But now looking back, it's like Isabelle lives with him now, you know, half of the time. And with who? With Aaron and Michelle. Yeah. And he's a nice guy. I think what happened was inappropriate. I think I take full accountability on the fact that, you know, I. I didn't abandon Michelle the way she kind of portrays it. But I, you know, it was unfortunate. We had the baby during COVID and, you know, there was no help for her. And like, she admitted she was a stay at home mom. And I went back to work and I wasn't doing. I wasn't going out and partying and doing all these things. Like she said. Yeah, I know it was. It was hard for her and. And you know, you feel like you.
[31:22]
Amanda Hirsch
Should have been maybe more supportive like postpartum for her.
[31:25]
Jesse Lally
You know, it's hard. It's like I talked to my mom and she's like, I don't know what this girl's talking about. And she's like, I have, you know, 12,000 photos of you the first five months, just at home with the baby. And the first three or four months were during lockdown. So it's like, you know, there was. It probably wasn't until September or so that I went back to work. So this idea that I, like, left her, you know, with a newborn at home, just.
[31:49]
Amanda Hirsch
Well, she said other things too. She says in this one of these last episodes when she's screaming, she's so mad at you, she screams to the whole house about different things that you've done. She says, he never called me pretty, never wanted to hug me, never wanted to kiss me.
[32:04]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[32:05]
Amanda Hirsch
Is that true?
[32:06]
Jesse Lally
She says a lot. And it's interesting because I have talked to other women that I've dated and. And, you know, even my. My current relationship, she says, like, I was never affectionate. And none of them can believe that because I. I am a very affectionate person. And I used to say to Michelle, well, you know, if you like, give to receive, right and that's a shitty, narcissistic, egotistical thing to say. But like, you know, we had this weird dynamic that we would fight about work and then go home and try to watch, you know, Netflix together. And we still had these like, conversations about deals that we were doing together. So there was that element of our relationship that's different than most. And yeah, I mean, I wasn't wildly affectionate with Michelle.
[32:49]
Amanda Hirsch
And why, what do you think happened there? You think resentment from work stuff?
[32:54]
Jesse Lally
No, I think it's just a, it's a fine balance of being able to cut that off when you get home and you make dinner together and, and you know, and she wasn't that with she, when people say she's cold, I don't think she's cold. She's reserved. And she wasn't affectionate with me at all. She never came up behind me and gave me a hug. And you even see in the Big Bear episode of season one when she came up and gave me the hug from behind and I was like, ooh, they made me a little tingly. Because she never did that ever, ever, ever. So she didn't really do it. And I sort of mirrored what she was giving me, you know what I mean? And she didn't deserve it. And I wish I could have been a little bit overly affectionate with her, but I mirrored her energy.
[33:35]
Amanda Hirsch
Take us to like moments when the relationship was good at the beginning.
[33:38]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[33:39]
Amanda Hirsch
Because she, I feel like she's in a state the last two seasons that we've seen her. It's hard for her to remember that. And she even says she calls it like the longest one night stand of her life. Does that offend you?
[33:50]
Jesse Lally
It does, yeah. Because she says something like that. But yet we travel the world together. I propose to her, we had a baby together. Like, that's not a one night stand. That's a deflection from, you know, or sort of a, you know, using her pain to make, to make something better. I guess to say I was just like a long one night stand. It just like she's also going to have to explain that to her daughter because then it's like, did you not want to marry him? Did you not want to have a child with him if he was just a long one night stand? You know what I mean? And at the very beginning it was, you know, she was in her, God, mid-20s and we used to, you know, I, I remember one day we went to the Roosevelt Hotel to hang by the pool and we had, I don't know, six bottles of rose, and it was like one of those, like, amazing. Like, that's how we used to be. And then after she had the baby, she just lost her taste for red wine. Like, you know, you've had. You've had babies, like. Yeah, it's. It. It just changes. Like, wine started to taste bitter, and then she, like, it was just. It was a weird dynamic because we used to have this going out on dates, drinking wine, going to nice restaurants, and we kind of lost that. And then during COVID it was like, we didn't have a grandma, grandpa to watch Isabella while we went on date night.
[35:07]
Amanda Hirsch
Both of your parents are not in California.
[35:09]
Jesse Lally
They're in Boston. Yeah.
[35:10]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay. And her parents.
[35:11]
Jesse Lally
Her. Her mom, who's recently passed, was down in Mexico, and her brother and sister lived right above the border in San Diego.
[35:18]
Amanda Hirsch
Getting, like, nannies and babysitters during COVID was, like, crazy. And you wouldn't want to let in anybody, right? Yeah. That is hard.
[35:25]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. So we didn't. I mean, four or five months, we didn't go on a single date.
[35:29]
Amanda Hirsch
But I have to say, like. Like season one, even though season two is crazy, what's happening between you two.
[35:35]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[35:36]
Amanda Hirsch
Season one, when you were still living together, is. Was almost harder to watch because you're living together and you feel these, like, feelings of hate. Like, at least that's. It felt to me like she just was, you know, and. And I wonder why she was boiling over with rage towards you.
[35:57]
Jesse Lally
Do you know, it was hard to watch back because, like, you know, I watched that scene with her and Brittany and Big Bear where she was like, I just don't love him anymore. But. But yet, you know, we. She did try to leave in 2022, around the same time that I had heard that she'd met Aaron and we decided to stay together. I begged and pleaded and why did.
[36:18]
Amanda Hirsch
You beg and plead for. For Isabella?
[36:20]
Jesse Lally
No, I just. I never thought divorce. Like, I feel like once you're a family, you can figure out how to sort of make things work or some. There's give and take, and there's changes that can be made on both sides. Like I said, like, you accept what you've brought to the table, except what the other person has, and try to meet somewhere in the middle. And I was doing the work to do that. And, you know, then all of a sudden, March, right before we started filming, we got a new house together, and I thought, all right, well, you know, now it's been six months since we talked about separating. The first Time things should be, you know, okay, if we're getting a house.
[36:59]
Amanda Hirsch
And is this the West Hollywood house that we see on the show?
[37:02]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, so. And then it just. It just wasn't. And then when I found out the cheating stuff, and, you know, again, it's like the emotional component with Aaron, like, if she's having conversations about her marriage and he's having conversations about women that he's dating. Now she's comparing the two of us. Like, oh, if I was with a guy like that, would I be better off than I am with Jesse?
[37:22]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[37:23]
Jesse Lally
And that's sort of the emotional component of it that I thought was completely inappropriate, and I think that's honestly what happened.
[37:30]
Amanda Hirsch
How hurt were you by all this?
[37:33]
Jesse Lally
Pretty. Pretty catastrophic. I mean, I. You know, we. We had had a conversation. When we separated in mid October, I knew what that storyline of season one was, is us working on our marriage. And I was like, we cannot tell anybody. We have to keep it a secret. So From October to January 1, we would go out. We'd, you know, she was going on dates with her boyfriend wearing her wedding ring and her engagement ring because we didn't want people to know. And it was. It was like, you know, looking back on it, I'm. I'm like, we could probably have told the network and told our friends and moved on, but it was. Again, it was like, if I keep her in the house, can I make it work? And I tried for weeks and weeks and weeks. And then about three weeks after we separated, she told me that she was seeing somebody. Sat me down in our office, and she. She said she was seeing somebody. And from that point on, it was like, you know, it was. It was bad.
[38:27]
Amanda Hirsch
And how soon after that did you start dating your girlfriend?
[38:30]
Jesse Lally
We started dating in February. So it was about, what, the six, five. Six months after.
[38:36]
Amanda Hirsch
Do we not say her name?
[38:38]
Jesse Lally
You can say her name. It's pretty. It's pretty public.
[38:41]
Amanda Hirsch
Oh, it's public. Public.
[38:42]
Jesse Lally
I mean, it's all over the Internet.
[38:44]
Amanda Hirsch
She just doesn't want to be on the show.
[38:46]
Jesse Lally
We. We had a conversation about it, and it was. I mean, we started dating. Michelle was still living at the house, and a couple, about a week later, she moved out. And we'd been dating two or three months, and Michelle hadn't even filed for divorce. And then the show was. Was asking if, you know, Lacy would want to be on it, and we talked about it. It's like, it's hard enough to start a new relationship in. In the middle of the beginning of A divorce where, you know, Michelle hadn't even filed yet. And then the Isabella factor was the most important. Where, thank God, Isabella's took it so well. Like my introducing a woman who's not her mom.
[39:25]
Amanda Hirsch
How did you explain it?
[39:27]
Jesse Lally
I just said, you know, I. I spoke to a behavioral therapist. I spoke to her school. I spoke to so many people about, like the introduction after divorce. And I just said, you know, this is. This is daddy's new friend and friend. And she has a. She has a daughter as well. And, you know, it just. It was very organic. And yeah, they got along really well from. From the get go. So it was. It was good, but it was. It was hard. It was like, do I want to start a relationship on a TV show where, what. We're going to shoot scenes with my daughter who just met this person? And so we talked about it a.
[40:03]
Amanda Hirsch
Lot, and we see a future in which maybe she. She will film.
[40:06]
Jesse Lally
I. I mean, I'd love to have that conversation. We're gonna. Season three hasn't been announced yet, but we're all kind of standing by to see what happens.
[40:13]
Amanda Hirsch
That's so wild. One of the things Michelle has talked about was about the delivery of Isabella.
[40:19]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, you can clear that right up.
[40:21]
Amanda Hirsch
I want you to. Because as. As a woman who has given birth.
[40:24]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[40:25]
Amanda Hirsch
Like, okay. She said if people didn't see. She said you were very controlling in the delivery room. You didn't want her to have an epidural. You were like, didn't want her to have a C section. You want her to do it natural. Yeah.
[40:36]
Jesse Lally
So go back to the beginning.
[40:38]
Amanda Hirsch
Go. I mean, listen, go back to when, like the mucus plug. Now. Go back to. You want to. So that's not true.
[40:45]
Jesse Lally
Let's start with conception.
[40:46]
Amanda Hirsch
No, no, I'm just kidding.
[40:47]
Jesse Lally
No, you know, like I said, it was, you know, we're in month nine. It's March 2020. Lockdown. Boom. All the baby and me classes, the diaper changing classes, cpr, all canceled. And our doctor said to us, like, if you go to the hospital and you're not ready ready, they will send you away. And most new parents are like, freaked out and they go bag and they get in the car. So we had a conversation. I had always had conversations. I mean, I didn't even start taking Advil until I think I was 40. Right. So I had brought up home birth, natural birth. And Michelle was like, absolutely not. But we had conversations about it. But the big factor.
[41:24]
Amanda Hirsch
Why was it important to you?
[41:25]
Jesse Lally
I just didn't want, like, I. I didn't want the baby to come into a world full of drugs in a stressful environment. Like, all these things that you read about and you hear about, whether they were true or not. It's what I believed in my head.
[41:38]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[41:38]
Jesse Lally
But I also. I wasn't that controlling. It was. It's a partnership between Michelle and I.
[41:43]
Amanda Hirsch
You say you just brought it up. She wasn't into it, so you let it go.
[41:46]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. And then. So we get to the. We get to. She goes into labor and call the doctor, make sure you're ready. Ready. And then, literally, I went to. To bed that night. She was on the phone all night with her sister, and it was Covid. So I'd grown out this beard, and she's like, I don't want you to have a beard for the pictures. Make sure you shave in the morning. Like, it was like that. And we get to the hospital, pull into the garage. Covid check at the bottom of the elevator for both of us. They send her up another Covid check. They send me back to my car, literally five parking spots away from the elevator, and they call me up 45 minutes later, and they're like, she's four and a half centimeters. It's. You know, we're gonna admit her, and.
[42:27]
Amanda Hirsch
Which I can confirm because I gave birth during COVID and my husband wasn't allowed with me until I got checked in. Like, you go to the triage, they check you and whatever.
[42:36]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[42:36]
Amanda Hirsch
And you go there alone.
[42:37]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[42:37]
Amanda Hirsch
And the husband can join at the. In the. In the labor and delivery room.
[42:42]
Jesse Lally
Right.
[42:42]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay.
[42:42]
Jesse Lally
So we. They called me back up. I walked five spots. They checked me again, and then they sent me up to the room. And the epidural thing, I just asked about it. I was like, you know, does it go into the bloodstream? This and that? And they're like, no, it's in the lower back or whatever. Spinal cord. I mean, you know. And that wasn't the conversation with the doctor. That was with the nurses. And she got the epidural almost immediately. Then when she was stalled at seven and a half, we started having the pitocin conversation. And the doctor, as you know, is never in there until it's go time.
[43:14]
Amanda Hirsch
Right.
[43:15]
Jesse Lally
So I was talking to the nurses.
[43:16]
Amanda Hirsch
About it, and I was like, no, she wasn't dilating. I feel weird talking about her birth story, but she was stuck at seven and a half for a while.
[43:22]
Jesse Lally
For a while. Okay. Yeah. But she went. Everything was going so smoothly. And then, you know, the doctor, obviously, we had a Conversation on the phone. And I. You know, a new time parent asking all these questions. And he was like, look, you have the option of a C section. Or she. She wasn't. You know, her heart rate wasn't. Wasn't all over the place. She wasn't. There wasn't any issue with her, The. The baby. It was just my conversation about Pitocin and. And all of that. And then he just was basically like, if she's stuck for too long, we'll have to do a C section. I was like, fine, just do it. And a couple hours later, she gave birth. And then they sent me home 20 minutes after.
[44:01]
Amanda Hirsch
Were you against the Pitocin or against the C section or both?
[44:05]
Jesse Lally
I was originally asking questions about the Pitocin because I didn't understand it.
[44:10]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[44:10]
Jesse Lally
And I was worried about her coming into this world with drugs in her blood system. Right. Then he explained it to me, and he was like, you can you have option A or option baby?
[44:18]
Amanda Hirsch
And I was like, either let the Pitocin do its thing or do.
[44:22]
Jesse Lally
If she. If her heart rate starts to go down or blood pressure goes down, you.
[44:25]
Amanda Hirsch
Would have to do.
[44:26]
Jesse Lally
Then you have to do it. So I was like, all right, well, I don't want that either, so just do it. It was just a conversation with the doctor.
[44:32]
Amanda Hirsch
But how do you think Michelle felt like it was more your decision than hers? Like, because she should. You should make it together, but it is her body, and. And I wouldn't want anyone making that decision for me.
[44:43]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[44:44]
Amanda Hirsch
Do you feel like you took control a little bit more than you should have, or did she need that in that moment? Was she, like. Because, you know, when you're contracting all that shit, like.
[44:54]
Jesse Lally
Right. And she said that she. She had this total recall, but then followed it up with, you know, I was in labor, and I don't remember everything super clearly.
[45:02]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[45:02]
Jesse Lally
100%. I took control because in that moment, I felt like that was my job to make the decisions when she was, you know, dilated. And it was just. But it was something that we discussed. I never wanted to. I was hoping that it would be natural. Ish. Right. Like, she would go into labor, it would take four or five hours, she would push, and the baby would come out.
[45:25]
Amanda Hirsch
And you try to push without an epidural, Jesse.
[45:28]
Jesse Lally
No, no, the epidural was fine.
[45:29]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay. Okay.
[45:30]
Jesse Lally
It's like the Pitocin and, like. Like I said.
[45:32]
Amanda Hirsch
Well, the Pitocin, though. Let me explain it to you. The Pitocin is when you're stuck so long At a, at a thing. The Pitocin helps you move along.
[45:39]
Jesse Lally
Right? Like everybody and you just explain it. All I did was ask the doctor and he explained it the same way you did.
[45:46]
Amanda Hirsch
So it's not like a scare. Like, I would rather do Pitocin. And then if I wasn't, if it wasn't moving, then I like C section. To me personally, I. That's the people. Some people schedule a C section from the gut. They don't even want to get to the point where they're, you know, which is also fine. But like, yeah, Pitocin would have moved her along and then. But you did the C section. Baby's healthy, mom's healthy.
[46:08]
Jesse Lally
Right?
[46:08]
Amanda Hirsch
That's what matters.
[46:09]
Jesse Lally
It all worked out and.
[46:10]
Amanda Hirsch
But she looks like Michelle is feeling in retrospect, like he controlled the situation where, you know, I would have wanted more anatomy over my body.
[46:20]
Jesse Lally
Is she doing that or is she using that story as a one sided narrative to start this campaign of control? Like that's, that's the way I look at it is like, you know, Michelle started this podcast where everything is like, you know, she has on her boyfriend, her. Her two friends that are super supportive, our old. My old manager that represents her to create a narrative. And what's the best way to start with a controlling narrative? By telling this story that doesn't. It's not the truth. And I will tell you how it's not the truth. I got sent home at 1:30 after Isabella was born. At 12:50, I was sent home about 1:30 and I went home, poured a scotch, checked in with a hundred friends that we just had the baby and started the baby book, you know, very east coast, old school. And I was writing in that baby book till 5, 6 in the morning, telling the story exactly how it happened. And that's how I know that this story that she told about her birth experience was. And I give her credit, she tried to start this one sided narrative about my control issues and yeah, all that. So that's just my kind of feeling on the whole thing.
[47:34]
Amanda Hirsch
Would you handle the birth differently today? Okay.
[47:38]
Jesse Lally
And keep in mind, it's like we were all freaked out. Like nobody had a.
[47:42]
Amanda Hirsch
Nobody knows. Nobody knows what you're doing.
[47:44]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, I mean, I walked in. I love to tell this story. We walked in and, you know, you walk into the delivery room and everyone's like, steal diapers. Steal. Take everything in the room and put in your bag.
[47:53]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[47:54]
Jesse Lally
And I walked into that hospital at Cedars and it looked like the opening scene of the walking Dead. When he wakes up in the hospital and all the equipment are out in the hallway. And I was like, you know, you hear machines going off and there's nurses running around and, and then even Michelle, when she went in the post room, which I wasn't allowed in, she's calling me on the phone and she's like, the baby's crying. I don't know what to do. And I'm like, where are the nurses? She's like, well, I have to hit the emergency button to get them in there.
[48:20]
Amanda Hirsch
I mean, like, you're left to your own devices during that time.
[48:23]
Jesse Lally
It was crazy. And then, you know, same thing. It was like I, I had to pick her up on the street. When I went to pick her up the next day, you know, they wheeled her out with the baby on the. I didn't even know how to put the baby.
[48:34]
Amanda Hirsch
Was she born?
[48:34]
Jesse Lally
Isabella, April 15, 2020.
[48:36]
Amanda Hirsch
So that was still. So Noah was born in August. So mine was like covety, but not as covety as yours.
[48:42]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, this was like, this was like three weeks into lockdown.
[48:45]
Amanda Hirsch
Wow, that's crazy.
[48:46]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[48:47]
Amanda Hirsch
We'll be right back after the break. As you guys already know, I'm in my wellness journey era. I've started worrying about my, my protein intake, my fiber, my this, my that. Like, I. Everything just kind of changed about how I see meals now. So this is a whole new era for me. This era includes drinking protein shakes and adding protein powder to my smoothies to get that protein in. And I've been using Clean Simple Eats. It's my newest protein powder obsession. It is clean, it's amazing tasting and mixes well. Clean Simple Eats, you guys. And it's grass fed, which I love. No seed oils, no artificial ingredients. It's third party tested, non GMO gluten free, and each scoop has 20 grams of proteins. It's creamy and it's smooth. And sometimes, you guys, I make like a hot chocolate with it. I told you so. I'll just add one scoop to hot water. Make a hot chocolate.
[49:41]
Jesse Lally
You.
[49:41]
Amanda Hirsch
They have amazing flavors to choose from. I'm loving the brownie, the chocolate brownie one. Also love the vanilla one. So in addition to their best selling protein powders, Clean Simple Eats also has clear protein powder. Regina, who works with me, loves the clear so much. It's all the hype right now. They have a pink burst flavor. It's life changing. It tastes like you melted pink starburst. And it's so popular. It's so delicious. You just mix a clear protein powder with water and you get a refreshing and light drink with 20 grams of protein. Visit cleansimpleats.com use my code not skinny20 at checkout for 20% off your first order. That's clean Simple Eats.com the code is not skinny20 for 20% off your first Order. The link is also in the show notes. There is so much to think about with pregnancy and even with postpartum, you know. And the last thing you should have to worry about is if your nutrient support is pregnancy safe. And that's why I blindly trust Ritual. Like such a relief when I found them I knew about them for years. I also love that their mom found it. Their third party tested for heavy metals and microbes and they share the sources and suppliers behind their ingredients, which I love. Ritual offers tailored nutrient support for your key phases of pregnancy. From fertility support to that supports conception to their essential prenatal which you would take before you get pregnant and their post natal multis which I take to support key nutrients before, during and after pregnancy. This is what like a mom founded pregnancy support looks like. They get it. They just get it. Ever since they came out I thought their capsules were just so cool looking and that you could trace back where everything came from. You really need key vitamins when you are a new mom and you need to make sure that you're getting them. Like vitamins A, C, D3 and zinc. They support your normal immune function. Omega 3 DHA supports fatty acid content of breast milk, biotin and choline to support women's increased nutrient requirements during lactation. It's rigorously tested you guys for allergens, microbes and heavy metals. And this is non gmo. It's gluten and major allergen free certified B corp. And like I said, it's made traceable. So when it comes to pregnancy and postpartum support, you want products backed by research and transparency. Mom founded Ritual puts in the work and shows you the proof. Get 25% off your first month for a limited time at ritual.com/not skinny. That's ritual.com not skinny for 25% off your first month. I feel so chic that Jenny Kane is sponsoring my pod. Like hi Jenny, I love you. No seriously, I feel, I feel very chic. Jenny Kane is just where you want to go when you want to be a chic Meghan Markle looking Sophia Richie looking chic lady. If you're in your 30s, you're ready to slip. You're ready to live your life. You're ready to look like chic, easy going, quiet luxury. And Jenny Kane is the go to brand for that. I'm just obsessed. And Jenny Kane has just classic elevated pieces that are perfect for every occasion. Listen, their Flynn cashmere sweater. I mean, I'm sure you've seen it all over social but let me tell you, it's honestly better than it looks online. Like, it is so soft, the yarn is so lightweight. The fit is perfect whether it's tucked or untucked. And the v neckline adds on an elevated touch to any out it. So you could be grabbing coffee, heading to the office or going out to dinner. Like this sweater. And so many of their other cashmere sweaters are just closet staples. And what really sets them apart at Jenny Kane is they are committed to quality. So every piece, you can feel it. It's made with incredible attention to detail and the finest materials. Find your new spring uniform at Jenny Kane and my listeners. Get 15 off your first order when you use code not skinny15 at checkout. That's 15 off your first order. Jenny kane dot com. That's J E n n I k a y n e.com promo code is not skinny 15. Like getting dressed be one less thing you have to worry about. And we're back on this season. You and Kristen are buddies.
[53:50]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[53:50]
Amanda Hirsch
Which like flashback to you yelling at her last season. Kristen has a way she gets over. I feel like Kristen an apology and she's good to move on. Are you still friendly with her? Is she. Who. Who are you closest to in the group?
[54:03]
Jesse Lally
Shockingly, probably Kristen and Luke.
[54:05]
Amanda Hirsch
Stop.
[54:06]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I talk to Jax almost every day, you know, and I'm super proud of what. What he's.
[54:11]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[54:12]
Jesse Lally
I mean, half proud of what he's trying to do. But yeah, Kristen and Luke, you know, kind of a shocker not to give a reunion teaser away, but the truth is a lot of people didn't know that it was actually Kristen who reached.
[54:26]
Amanda Hirsch
Out to me first about the boyfriend thing.
[54:29]
Jesse Lally
No, I was in.
[54:30]
Amanda Hirsch
Oh, when you reconciled.
[54:32]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, I was in. I was in New York. Everyone thought I reached out to be strategic. That was what everybody's been saying, including Michelle. And I had missed my flight. Coming back from watch what happens live exactly a year ago. We were sitting at the apartment and we're watching the episode, Lacy, my old manager and I. And all of a sudden I look at my phone. It's a message from Kristen. And it was the. The scene at the fireplace where I was crying and saying my marriage was over and Danny was Crying up in Big Bear.
[55:00]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[55:00]
Jesse Lally
And Kristen reached out with, like, the most gracious text message. Like, I didn't realize what you were going through. And I followed it up with, you know, wrote back. And I was like, oh, my God, thank you so much. It means so much. Like, let's get together. And then we, you know, Luke and I started hanging out, and Chris and I started talking more. And then the beginning of the summer, we sat down at my house and. And I apologize to her.
[55:21]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay, so you're good with Kristen.
[55:23]
Jesse Lally
Good with Kristen.
[55:24]
Amanda Hirsch
With the other girls, you pissed them off this season, and you also seemed like you didn't care you were pissing them off. Like, I'm like, why isn't he trying to, like, be good with everybody?
[55:33]
Jesse Lally
Right.
[55:34]
Amanda Hirsch
Where we talked about, like, how whether you're thinking of the cameras thinking about the show, and it's like, Janet and Brittany were really mad at you.
[55:41]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[55:42]
Amanda Hirsch
Up at Santa Barbara, even though the season is kind of tricky because there was that moment where Michelle wanted you to not stay at the house, which was crazy. And I think most people. I even. You know, when I posted about it on Instagram, like, most people, I feel like if there were teams in that moment, you had backing over that because it was a ridiculous request. Like, it was your house to have you exiled from the house. And I think people thought it was, like, just immature the way she went about the pole.
[56:10]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[56:10]
Amanda Hirsch
You know, because you did the mature thing of inviting her.
[56:13]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[56:13]
Amanda Hirsch
And including her. And then she did the poll of. Of. Of getting you out. So the girls there were like, no, it's his trip. Like, it seemed like most of the girls. Then we get to the trip, and there's the. And all the comments, and Brittany and Janet get really pissed. Janet, what did she say to you? Like, oh, I would cheat on you, too. Like, when people say shit like that to you, like, what does it. Do you care? Does it roll off your back?
[56:36]
Jesse Lally
No. I mean, Janet and I have an interesting relationship. We've never actually gone toe to toe, and she's never really come after me about anything. And that was a moment where we. We all know. I think. I think the entire fan base thinks j. Janet is sort of. She. She knows the reality TV world so well that she's trying so hard to.
[56:59]
Amanda Hirsch
Like, People call her a fan girl.
[57:01]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[57:01]
Amanda Hirsch
What do you think of that?
[57:02]
Jesse Lally
I didn't know any of that backstory. She was always around. You know, Jax and I were friends. I introduced Michelle to all the girls. Janet was always around. But we Never until we started doing the show, we were never, like, sitting down, having conversations, and, like, it was like, hello. And she was always around.
[57:18]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay.
[57:19]
Jesse Lally
And, you know. Yeah, I, I, it's, it's like one of those things where I've noticed, especially watching back this entire season, when Janet gets cornered or feels like she's losing, she just runs away and then yells back the last words. And you'll see that play out with a lot of people throughout the season. And, and yeah, it doesn't bother me. You know, I, I, I wanted to have a conversation with Janet and Brittany earlier on, and Santa Barbara was just a bad.
[57:49]
Amanda Hirsch
That was bad.
[57:50]
Jesse Lally
I don't want to make excuses, but the reality was I didn't want to. I didn't drink for, like four or five weeks leading up.
[57:58]
Amanda Hirsch
You drank three bottles of champagne in the morning.
[58:00]
Jesse Lally
As soon as Kristen and I got there, we.
[58:03]
Amanda Hirsch
Oh, she was your drinking buddy.
[58:04]
Jesse Lally
Kristen, Luke and I, we started making aperol spritz as soon as we, I hadn't drank in four or five weeks. And then I picked up right where I left off. And, you know, I don't know if I was nervous that I was going to be in a house with my ex wife or, but, like, thinking back on, I'm like, I was going to be in a house with my ex wife, and there was so much tension. Why would I just choose that moment to start, like, you know, having this frat boy.
[58:26]
Amanda Hirsch
When you see yourself, like, in the underwear.
[58:28]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[58:29]
Amanda Hirsch
Yelling at Jason, like, what, what do you feel? Are you, like, cringing at yourself? Do you get the state of mind you were in? Even Jason? Like, I'm like, why are you yelling at Jason? You were like, get the out of here.
[58:39]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[58:40]
Amanda Hirsch
Why?
[58:41]
Jesse Lally
I was just so overwhelmed at that point. It was, you know, we, we all, we all know Michelle's made it very clear that I'm a crier and I'm very emotional and stuff like that. And it's, it was like, I just wish go thinking back to it the second instead of trying to give her a white flag and making a joke out of it. I wish I just pulled her aside in the, you know, driveway and been like, let's hash it out. I didn't do that at Dave and Buster's when the, when the rumor came out, because I was just, like, a little in shock.
[59:11]
Amanda Hirsch
And the rumor you said was not.
[59:12]
Jesse Lally
True, the billionaire rumor, I never believed it, but I had heard it. It wasn't like I made it up. I had heard it. And, you know, I, I said It. I've said it a couple times. Like, I remember telling Michelle that I heard that rumor in the doorway of her apartment when I was dropping stuff off. And. And it wasn't the first time she heard it. That's why, you know, other comments I saw were she was, like, crying about this rumor, and then all of a sudden, she shuts off the tears and starts doing this poll about me not getting invited to the house. She. You know, I think she was crying because it came up on camera, not because she heard it.
[59:49]
Amanda Hirsch
Got you. Okay.
[59:50]
Jesse Lally
So, yeah, I regret, you know, I was very emotional, and I should have just ended it with a conversation right away.
[59:57]
Amanda Hirsch
Well, you couldn't, Jesse, because then you have a conversation at the winery, and you. You start good, and then you lost it midway.
[60:03]
Jesse Lally
I know. It was. The whole. The whole thing was bad. It was a bad experience. I'm super.
[60:08]
Amanda Hirsch
Did you ever say sorry to her?
[60:09]
Jesse Lally
Oh, a thousand times.
[60:10]
Amanda Hirsch
Really?
[60:11]
Jesse Lally
Oh, yeah.
[60:11]
Amanda Hirsch
Did she accept?
[60:13]
Jesse Lally
No. And I don't know, like, she brought it up at the premiere, her and her boyfriend. Her boyfriend came up and started talking. He made some, like, weird joke. And again, I wasn't drinking at the premiere. And she came over and she's like, I'll never forgive you for calling me a hooker.
[60:28]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[60:28]
Jesse Lally
And I was like, Listen, I've apologized 50 times, and I don't know if you should forgive me. It's. It's unforgivable.
[60:35]
Amanda Hirsch
What do you think of her boyfriend? Their moments? The fans are kind of seeing a little bit more of him. Aaron and I feel like in pictures, before we saw him, like, filmed, you were like, oh, like, cute. And then he. People are kind of questioning, like, what's going on there. He's, like, very kind of aware of what's going on around him. Like, I don't know. I don't know how to read him. I didn't get a read yet.
[60:57]
Jesse Lally
He's the polar opposite of me. He's perfect for Michelle.
[61:00]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[61:00]
Jesse Lally
You know, and you see it in, like, Dave and Busters, where she's like, I'm so stressed out. And he says to her something like, why you're so strong. You know, and he's. He's a very.
[61:09]
Amanda Hirsch
Like, she needs that. Yeah.
[61:10]
Jesse Lally
She's very calming influence on. On her. And not saying that. I'm not, but I've seen their dynamic. And.
[61:17]
Amanda Hirsch
And it works.
[61:18]
Jesse Lally
And. And it works. Yeah, It's. It's good for. And, you know, he's. We've had multiple conversations now that Isabella's living at his House. He doesn't, he doesn't want to be a caretaker. But he's also very gentle and sweet and Isabella loves him. And, and it's.
[61:31]
Amanda Hirsch
So how often do you see Isabella?
[61:33]
Jesse Lally
We are doing every other weekend and then two days on, two days off during the week. Week. So a 2, 2, 3 schedule.
[61:40]
Amanda Hirsch
We just switched to so every other weekend and two days on, two days.
[61:44]
Jesse Lally
So we'll do like Monday, Tuesday, I'll drop her off at school on Wednesday. Her mom will have her Wednesday night. Thursday, drop her off Friday and then I'll have her for the weekend. So it's 2, 2, 3 and it's a pretty common schedule.
[61:53]
Amanda Hirsch
Sounds kind of nice.
[61:54]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[61:56]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay. Days off.
[61:57]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[61:57]
Amanda Hirsch
You know, or is it, is it hard? Is it. Have you learned to live with it?
[62:01]
Jesse Lally
I'm so obsessed with her. It's hard. It's like, like you drop her off at school Friday morning and then you're like, that was a long, you know, couple of days. And then by Friday night we, We FaceTime at 7pm every night when we're.
[62:14]
Amanda Hirsch
Not with whatever parent is in with her. That's nice. And do you keep it super nice next to her? Like you and Michelle?
[62:21]
Jesse Lally
Oh yeah. Yeah.
[62:22]
Amanda Hirsch
You're good at that.
[62:22]
Jesse Lally
When we're around Isabella, we have, you know, other than the very, very beginning. Yeah, that was super toxic. Isabelle is very happy with, with us.
[62:30]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay. You killed me when you were like fries from the Chateau. Like killed me because like, do you not cook?
[62:37]
Jesse Lally
No, I do cook.
[62:38]
Amanda Hirsch
Oh, you do?
[62:39]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, but he loves him.
[62:40]
Amanda Hirsch
She just loves the fries.
[62:41]
Jesse Lally
The, the fries at Chateau. First time I ever discovered them. Sunset beach on Shelter Island. Same Andre Balas hotel. Best fries in the world.
[62:50]
Amanda Hirsch
And they, they, they deliver at the same quality.
[62:52]
Jesse Lally
They. Yeah, there was, I think that last scene. I think you posted about me crying in the last scene of season one with Michelle and she has the, the Bloody Mary and the French fries. They delivered that up for that day for her.
[63:06]
Amanda Hirsch
You ordered it.
[63:07]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. Like I get delivery of French fries up to the house. If I don't walk down, I live.
[63:13]
Amanda Hirsch
Oh, you live right there like three.
[63:15]
Jesse Lally
Houses up the street.
[63:15]
Amanda Hirsch
True, true, true, true, true. Okay, and what about this whole thing about you spending money like crazy? You don't have it. You spent all their. Her money or your money together on thousands of dollars of bottles of wine. And what do you say to that?
[63:30]
Jesse Lally
It's again, it's a way to control a narrative to, you know, it completely one sided. The, the reality is we did have a lot of Money. The real estate market in LA 2324 was very, very difficult spending that much money on wine. Like, I don't have that big of a wine cellar, so the whole thing is fine.
[63:50]
Amanda Hirsch
But he does have a wine cellar. Yeah, it's just not that big.
[63:53]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[63:53]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay.
[63:54]
Jesse Lally
But no, the, the truth is.
[63:56]
Amanda Hirsch
So what's the most you spend on wine? A bottle?
[63:58]
Jesse Lally
Honestly, that, that, this whole thing of like $15,000 bottles. I think Lala said something like that in the after show. Like there's only one wine I think in the world, maybe DRC, that's 10,000 a bottle. And we used to do, we do these wine lunches that became kind of iconic in Beverly Hills. And the rule is everybody brings a bottle. We shot one of them for. I remember everybody brings a bottle and then, you know, we don't order off the wine list. We like. And if somebody does and they decide to order a couple bottles of champagne, they pay for lunch. So this idea of like, I think our biggest lunch, like I said, was $20,000. I didn't pay for that, but it.
[64:35]
Amanda Hirsch
Was like at all. It was divided by how much.
[64:37]
Jesse Lally
The most I've ever spent on a bottle of wine is probably a 1990 Lafitte, which is $2,200. Probably the most I've ever spent.
[64:46]
Amanda Hirsch
Who drank it with you?
[64:47]
Jesse Lally
Three or four. You know, private equity guy, estate manager. We, we do these network.
[64:54]
Amanda Hirsch
It's a business expense.
[64:55]
Jesse Lally
100 write off. 100. Yeah, I was audited. 100. They gave me the green light. But no, it, you know what? You know what? I have always been a grand gesture type of person. And I, I, I spend money.
[65:09]
Amanda Hirsch
It's scary. To bring shit like a bottle of wine in your house?
[65:13]
Jesse Lally
No, because I drink.
[65:13]
Amanda Hirsch
I, I mean somebody brought like a whispering angel.
[65:16]
Jesse Lally
It's amazing on Sunday afternoon.
[65:19]
Amanda Hirsch
Really?
[65:19]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. Ice cold rose. Yeah. No, I drink twenty dollars to two thousand dollar bottles. I'm just, I'm like studying for my level two song. I've been obsessed with wine since before I moved to New York, so.
[65:31]
Amanda Hirsch
Because now that you said that, because when you were talking about you and Michelle disconnecting, you were like. And then she stopped liking wine. Like that was a big thing for you.
[65:38]
Jesse Lally
It was a big thing. We got married in Napa. Like we did, you know, like that.
[65:42]
Amanda Hirsch
Was like, she changed like that.
[65:44]
Jesse Lally
We got married in Napa. We did, you know, Thomas Keller restaurant. We did a four day weekend. We did a big thing in Opus One for everybody.
[65:52]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[65:52]
Jesse Lally
And yeah. Ended at Promontory just Michelle and I was. It was a big, big part of our life. And. But, like, memories is what I spent money on. So, you know, one example, I always wanted to show Michelle and Isabella and. And my family from Boston our heritage. So when I was at that point of my career where I could take the entire family to the uk, Michelle, Isabel, and I spent a week in Paris. Isabella still talks about Paris. Then we met my family in London, went to the Scottish Highlands, got to see this castle that was in my grandmother.
[66:26]
Amanda Hirsch
What's your heritage? What are you?
[66:27]
Jesse Lally
English, Scottish and Irish.
[66:28]
Amanda Hirsch
Oh, okay.
[66:29]
Jesse Lally
Yeah, so we went to the Scottish Highlands. You know, I set up tea in a tour of Balmoral Castle when the. When the Queen was in residence for Michelle, Isabelle, and my mom, we went to Ireland. And Michelle, at the beginning of our separation, said the trip was a waste of money. And my mom said my brother, who did two tours in Iraq for this country, the happiest she's ever seen him. And that for me.
[66:54]
Amanda Hirsch
So you don't regret it?
[66:55]
Jesse Lally
I don't regret any dollar I spend on my family. I don't regret spending a month in Capri with Isabella when she was a year and a half. Because she still talks about it.
[67:03]
Amanda Hirsch
Well, yeah, she mentioned that she was like, Jesse wanted to go there because, like, all the famous people go there and all the. Does that kind of jabby thing, like, make you feel.
[67:14]
Jesse Lally
It's a. It's a. It's like.
[67:16]
Amanda Hirsch
Did you want to go there because famous people were there?
[67:18]
Jesse Lally
No.
[67:18]
Amanda Hirsch
It's beautiful.
[67:19]
Jesse Lally
I wanted to go there because my first trip there was the most magical experience I ever had. And then when I took Michelle back the second time, those people that I met, you know, that first time, they were like, oh, Jesse. And I'm like, how do these people remember me? I was here for 10 days a year ago, and it was just that community that I felt there. And it wasn't about being around famous people. It was about, if you want to sell to the uber wealthy, you go where the uber wealthy goes.
[67:48]
Amanda Hirsch
True.
[67:48]
Jesse Lally
Because there is an interesting thing where you'll meet somebody like, let's say we're worth a million dollars. You meet somebody who's worth a billion. When you're on an island like Capri and you're going to these restaurants and stuff like that, they don't know if you have a million, a hundred thousand.
[68:01]
Amanda Hirsch
Right.
[68:02]
Jesse Lally
They just see you living the same lifestyle.
[68:04]
Amanda Hirsch
Right.
[68:05]
Jesse Lally
And it's a way to have these conversations and network. Network. Yeah. I. I had this weird thing where Michelle Used to always joke about it. I never went up to people at restaurants and stuff. Michelle was really good at that to network. But some. Some reason I'd see somebody floating in the sea, you know, at a beach club, and I'm like, they look cool. I'm gonna go talk to them. And it was this, like.
[68:24]
Amanda Hirsch
That's where you opened up.
[68:26]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. Because again, you. You're there with all these people. They don't know who you are. They just think you're there visiting.
[68:32]
Amanda Hirsch
And I see. And then you can kind of.
[68:34]
Jesse Lally
Of. Yeah. And then you fake it till you make it.
[68:36]
Amanda Hirsch
Got you.
[68:37]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[68:37]
Amanda Hirsch
Okay. I appreciate that. Kristen made a remark about how Jason doesn't wear his wedding ring.
[68:42]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[68:43]
Amanda Hirsch
What do you say to that?
[68:44]
Jesse Lally
I mean, if you watch that scene, I followed up with there any rumors of him cheating? I mean, it's hard for. It's hard for me. And I. I was the one that brought it up to Jason before it all kind of came out. But, you know, it's hard for me because I was like, God, I had my wet. You know, I had my wedding ring off most of lock.
[69:03]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah.
[69:03]
Jesse Lally
Guys sometimes take them off washing my hands a thousand times.
[69:06]
Amanda Hirsch
You really don't want to be pissing Kristen off because she'll. She'll go. She'll go for it. Danny and Nia had a rough episode. I will say, even before seeing this, I feel like what you guys are saying to them, I mean, you weren't saying this, but the girls was kind of the vibe around town. It was. They seem, you know, like they're putting on this pretty perfect show.
[69:27]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[69:28]
Amanda Hirsch
And that, to me, was weird. Just as someone who's like postpartum me, like, seeing them debate baby number four when they're finding it difficult with three kids. Like, and then she's pregnant now, so I'm happy for them. And. And I hope she's. She's doing well. But when they were debating when she's in the scenes talking about wanting a baby, and I'm like, wait. But on. In the. For the scene before, you were saying, it's hard to be with three kids in. In this house, and it's so difficult. So why do you want number four for these? Like, like crazy. So I was questioning that. And then. So it kind of seemed like. And now everyone's kind of talking about, including the fans of the show, like, what's going on there? Because they seem like this perfect couple. But then what did you think? The alcohol thing. Meanwhile, you were chugging three bottles. Nobody says anything and then Danny goes to take a couple shots in the pantry.
[70:16]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[70:17]
Amanda Hirsch
And they're like, we have friends like that are in rehab. Like, what do you think? Are you.
[70:22]
Jesse Lally
I mean, like, there was a scene where Jason said Brittany was like, he ordered 12 bottles of Prosecco. And Jason's like, I don't understand. He looks younger than he is. He drinks like a fish. And you can never tell. And then there's other people like Danny, and that's why I coined him dark side Danny in season one, because you can tell Danny, Danny goes to the dark side very quickly. And, you know, you'll see that play out more and more. And unfortunately, I. And I, I, I. I said over and over again, like, this guy's made a couple mistakes. The only person he should be dealing with is the person involved. But all of a sudden, you know, and it's unfortunate that Jax came out before season two started filming and saying, oh, they were portrayed so perfect. I'm gonna bring him down. Which it wasn't fair.
[71:04]
Amanda Hirsch
Wow.
[71:04]
Jesse Lally
He said it on a podcast. And, you know, Danny. Yes. I. I had said from the beginning of season two that, look, they have a family dynamic, and I appreciate it. Like, they want to keep certain things. They. They have an unbelievable communication, the two of them. So things. They're not slandering each other to their friends, and they. They get together, they go to couples therapy, they talk it through, they come up with a solution, they move on. And I respect that. They don't have.
[71:38]
Amanda Hirsch
I think the. The complaint for people is, like, you're on a reality show.
[71:41]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[71:42]
Amanda Hirsch
The least you could do is say Danny's Dr. Like, he passed out drunk. And not like, okay, don't bring your marital issues. We get it. But, like, just give us Brittany's. Like, give us something. Like, I mean, your relationship was put on display and all the horrible things that happened between you and. And Jackson. Brittany, what's the deal with Quentin Tarantino? And why is he, like, a thing. A thing for you, The Valley?
[72:04]
Jesse Lally
I don't know.
[72:05]
Amanda Hirsch
It was, by the way, married, you guys, to an Israeli. The daughter of a very famous Israeli singer.
[72:12]
Jesse Lally
Right.
[72:12]
Amanda Hirsch
So in Israel, it's, like, a huge deal because he's. You'll see him in Tel Aviv, like, walking the streets, like, okay, Quinton. It's also a random marriage because she's literally the, like, a Nepo baby in Israel. But anyway, how is she? How is he in the Valley Life, unfortunately. Why?
[72:29]
Jesse Lally
Because it was. It was one of those things where, you know, if you don't want Things coming out. Don't talk about it. And I remember Michelle was with two girlfriends. They go down to the pool. She calls me up. She's like, there's a guy, Joaquin or some, and he's a director. And everyone keeps coming up to him, like, Quentin. I'm like. Like, Quentin Tarantino. She's like, yeah, yeah, that's who they're talking about. And so I was like, talk to him. Stay. Like, literally telling her to stay there. So she comes up. We go down, I think, the next day with Isabella, and he was there again. And we started talking about his new movie. And we had a listing that was, like, old 1970s property in the hills. So we were showing it to him. He talked about, you know, wanting to get a rental property, and we talked to him about real estate. I tried to pitch Isabella, like, you have to get her on the movie. You have to get her in the movie. Get in the movie.
[73:17]
Amanda Hirsch
Why you want her to be an actor?
[73:19]
Jesse Lally
She's done some stuff, but I thought it'd be fun. Like, we're sitting here at the pool with Tarantino. And then he had invited Michelle to. We started talking Mexican restaurants in la, and we were, like, going back and forth. What's the best? Who has the best margaritas? And he's like, oh, I. I go here every Wednesday, like, and invited Michelle to go. And. And Michelle followed up with him, and he didn't get back to her. And I'm like, just go. He told you the day, the time. Just go. So she went and had this, like, crazy lunch with him.
[73:47]
Amanda Hirsch
And wait, he was there at the time? He said he was gonna be.
[73:49]
Jesse Lally
He was there. And. And other, you know, actors and stuff would. Apparently, Michelle told me they would come in, they'd have a meeting with him, and she was there the whole time. And I mentioned it to Jax, and, like, all of a sudden, it was this thing like. Like, you let your wife go out on the end. I'm like, yeah, who cares? Like, yeah, the guy's married, and he. Happily married with two kids. And, like, I'm loyal. Like, I would never, obviously never think anything would happen. It was so platonic. I don't know why it became a thing.
[74:15]
Amanda Hirsch
That's the only thing that's going on with him. I feel like people bring him up all the time on the Valley.
[74:19]
Jesse Lally
They bring it up all the time because it's like. It's an. It's a name to be said. And it was one of those things. It literally started with the fact that I would allow Like I have to allow Michelle to go to a six hour lunch.
[74:30]
Amanda Hirsch
But you were thinking of this from a business perspective.
[74:32]
Jesse Lally
100. And she was too super platonic.
[74:35]
Amanda Hirsch
You're like this. I wasn't worried about.
[74:37]
Jesse Lally
No, not at all.
[74:39]
Amanda Hirsch
That's funny. Danny was asked then watch what happens live. Which lady of the group would he least want to be married to and why? Who would you say?
[74:47]
Jesse Lally
Who would I say?
[74:48]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah. From the Valley.
[74:51]
Jesse Lally
I mean, do I have to be married to any of them? I mean, the. He said Janet. And funny enough, if I was married to Janet, I feel like we would be like Bonnie and Clyde type of situation. I don't know. I mean, I don't. I guess Michelle.
[75:08]
Amanda Hirsch
Yeah, right. Easy answer, easy answer, easy answer. Okay, I got it. Well, thank you for coming.
[75:14]
Jesse Lally
Thank you for having me.
[75:16]
Amanda Hirsch
And I'm waiting to see how the rest of the season plays out.
[75:19]
Jesse Lally
I think you'll be very surprised. I think, you know, it's there, there. I keep saying I was told where season one, I knew exactly what the storyline was going to be. Right. I knew what I shot. I knew what Michelle shot this season. I had no idea because Jax and Brittany are not together. So those are two individual, you know, shooting schedules, Michelle and I, same thing. And yeah, I have a great relate. I like, literally had resolution with everybody and, and talk to everybody. So I was able to get a little piece of what was going to happen, but I wasn't.
[75:51]
Amanda Hirsch
So. Do you feel good about it, though?
[75:53]
Jesse Lally
I was nervous about it and I was told that in order to be a hero, you have to be a villain. And that's what people love about these shows is like, one day you're good, one day you're bad, one day you're good.
[76:02]
Amanda Hirsch
What are you feeling from the people? Like, what's it gen? What do you feel the vibe is? Is it. Do you feel the vibe is like people are on your side?
[76:10]
Jesse Lally
Shockingly.
[76:11]
Amanda Hirsch
Shockingly.
[76:11]
Jesse Lally
It's very Team Jesse.
[76:13]
Amanda Hirsch
Shockingly.
[76:14]
Jesse Lally
Yeah.
[76:14]
Amanda Hirsch
What do you say? Yeah, I mean, it is shocking.
[76:17]
Jesse Lally
Yeah. I think, I don't know, maybe it's just because I'm not trying to create a narrative. I'm just kind of like, I, I make bad decisions, I make great decisions. I take accountability. And you'll see it. Episode six, it's like, I know I screwed up in Santa Barbara. I dealt with it like on multiple different fronts. And then, you know, episode six, you'll, you'll see my conversation with my coach, like, like, why did this happen and how do I fix it? And I don't know. Maybe that's why.
[76:45]
Amanda Hirsch
Well, you're not going to be using the W word anymore.
[76:48]
Jesse Lally
No more W's.
[76:49]
Amanda Hirsch
No more scream into a pillow if.
[76:50]
Jesse Lally
You need to scream into a pillow. There you go.
[76:54]
Amanda Hirsch
Thank you guys so much for listening to this episode of Knots Skinny but Not Fat. Follow me on Instagram at Not Skinny but Not Fat. Subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss any episodes. Rate the podcast that you love so much on Apple Podcasts and write a little review. If you tell me you did, I'll give you a big virtual smoocharoo. Thank you guys so much for listening and I'll see you next Tuesday. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.