Podcast Summary

Podcast: Not Skinny But Not Fat
Host: Amanda Hirsch (Dear Media)
Episode Title: Mayci Neely: Sinner or Saint?
Release Date: October 21, 2025

Overview

This episode features Amanda Hirsch interviewing reality star and author Mayci Neely, known from the show "Secret Lives of Mormon Wives." They dive deep into the dramatic, often untold chapters of Mayci’s life — from teen pregnancy and relationships shadowed by tragedy and abuse, to faith, motherhood, and reality TV. The conversation is candid, vulnerable, and at times darkly funny, echoing both Amanda’s and Mayci’s approachable, open styles.

Key Discussion Points

1. Mayci’s Story: Getting Left Out of Editing

• Why wasn’t Mayci’s backstory in Season 1 of Secret Lives of Mormon Wives?

  • [06:13] Mayci explains she filmed scenes, but they weren't used, possibly because they weren’t “current drama.”
  • Quote: “I'm not enough drama for them... the stories that are impactful and that are relatable sometimes get cut.” (Mayci, 06:37)

• Transitioning her story to a memoir:

  • The book Told You So was born from her journals and old blogs.
  • Mayci wanted to reclaim her narrative and share more personal, even darkly humorous details.
  • Quote: “We did cut some of my really dark humor, which is probably for good reason because I think you would have been like, there’s something wrong with her.” (Mayci, 07:48)

2. Duality: The "Saint" and the "Sinner"

• Public vs. Private Persona:
  • On TV, Mayci has a saintly, kind air, but her book reveals a much more rebellious youth.
  • Amanda observes: “You are a naughty Mormon girl, which I feel like your vibe on the show doesn’t really give that.” (Amanda, 10:26)
  • Mayci embraces the duality, talking about past drinking, drugs, and frank sexual experiences:
  • Quote: “People who know me or my pastor, like, how are you a saint?” (Mayci, 10:53)

3. Abusive Relationship and Blackmail

• Detailing the trauma:

  • Mayci shares the evolution of an abusive year-long relationship, marked by manipulation, control, and escalation to physical and sexual assault.

  • [13:24] She describes early red flags (possessiveness, love bombing) and the slow ‘boiling-frog’ reality of abuse.

  • Quote: “I was so, like, manipulated when I was younger by him… I just didn’t realize, like, what was even going on.” (Mayci, 12:06)

  • Sexual Trauma:

    • The first physical abuse occurred after moving to college, often tied to the boyfriend’s drinking.
    • Most serious: being drugged and assaulted, and suffering blackmail via explicit photos.
    • Quote: “He’d be like, you’re screwed now. Like, I’m going to...I’m sending them these pictures that I took of you.” (Mayci, 16:58)

  • Coping Alone:

    • Did not reveal abuse at the time due to blackmail threats and paralyzing fear.
    • Struggled with self-blame and isolation, only more recently finding compassion for her younger self in therapy:
    • Quote: “The trauma from this is so hard to heal from, because I did put most the blame on myself, honestly all the blame, until I went to therapy.” (Mayci, 18:40)

4. Teen Pregnancy & Grief — Losing Eric

• Meeting Eric:

  • Soon after escaping her abusive ex, Mayci met Eric, whom her family didn’t approve of (partly thanks to his Snapchat handle: “ericmackdaddy69”).
  • Despite family disapproval and secrets (her parents didn’t know about the earlier abuse), she fell for him.

• Pregnancy and Tragedy:

  • Mayci became pregnant at 19. Her family was supportive but discussed adoption options openly.
  • Eric died in a car crash while they were fighting, and he was texting her at the time — a detail she’s processed with deep, lasting grief and some public shaming.
  • Quote: “He died sending me a text. Like, that's what happened...he was ejected from the car, like, flew through the windshield.” (Mayci, 55:00)
  • [54:14–57:32] Mayci discusses guilt, online blame, and how she eventually forgave herself.

• Motherhood as Transformation:

  • Her son became the “saving grace” that pushed her to change, focus, and build a better life.
  • Quote: “I feel like he’s truly, not only changed my life for the better, but changed me as a person for the better.” (Mayci, 42:17)

5. Life Within and After the Mormon Church

• Mormon rules and rebellion:

  • Describes both strict dorm policies at BYU and the subculture of students who still partied.
  • [32:45-34:35] Gives insight on how she (and others) navigated around BYU’s “Honor Code” — she withdrew before the administration could take disciplinary action.

• Repentance & Authority:

  • Mayci’s process of “repenting” to male bishops was shaming and traumatizing, something she’d never require of her daughters.
  • Quote: “I don’t want my daughter ever repenting to a middle-aged man. Like, that’s just not gonna happen.” (Mayci, 36:41)
  • Open parenting: KIDS can talk to her about anything, no shame.

• Drinking & Mormonism:

  • Sober since her first pregnancy, partly out of fear of returning to old patterns, but also reflecting her spiritual growth.

6. Single Motherhood, Blended Family, and Openness with Her Son

• Honesty about Eric’s death:
  • Mayci told her son the truth about his father from a young age, balancing facts with age-appropriate detail.
  • Maintains a relationship with Eric’s parents for her son’s sake.
  • Her current husband has been in her son’s life since he was a baby and is called "Dad."

7. Becoming a Reality Star & Influencer

• Unexpected fame:

  • Studied broadcast journalism, but never expected to be public-facing.
  • Built an audience first through a blog & Instagram, then TikTok (her video of her son went viral).
  • Joined the “Mom Talk” collective after meeting Taylor and Miranda.

• Joining Secret Lives of Mormon Wives:

  • [58:56–61:50] The pilot filmed in 2022; aired in 2024.
  • Admits to being a shy child, but grew into her role as a public personality.

8. Friendship Dramas & Reality TV Dynamics

• Friendship with Whitney and Michaela:

  • Explains offscreen and onscreen reasons for fallout with Whitney (texts, support during difficult times, being the “middle friend”).
  • [65:05–72:03] Mayci discusses feeling let down by Whitney, efforts to repair the relationship, and how editing skewed some dynamics.
  • Quote: “I tried to be there for her and it wasn’t really reciprocated. And then... she started getting chummy again, and out of nowhere she posts my texts online to make me look bad.” (Mayci, 68:31)

• Present Status:

  • Friendship has improved; Mayci is diplomatic, rooting for everyone (including both friends competing on Dancing with the Stars).

• Upcoming Season Tease:

  • Season 3 is “a little bit messy” but also more fun and lighthearted.
  • Quote: “Sometimes the fun stuff gets edited out, right?...I do feel like this season they kept some of that fun, light feeling in it.” (Mayci, 73:17)

9. Other Show Teases & Reflections

• Taylor’s upcoming “Bachelor” journey:
  • Mayci shares what she hopes for her friend (a steady, supportive guy), lightly teases the upcoming storyline.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Control & Blackmail:
  • “I was so manipulated … I just didn’t understand what was happening to me until it got really bad.” (Mayci, 12:06)
• On Shame and Healing:
  • “That’s part of the reason why the trauma from this is so hard to heal from, because I did put the blame on myself…until I went to therapy.” (Mayci, 18:40)
• Regarding Repentance:
  • “I don’t want my daughter ever repenting to a middle aged man. Like, that’s just not gonna happen.” (Mayci, 36:41)
• On Grief:
  • “He died sending me a text. That’s what happened.” (Mayci, 55:00)
• On Reality TV Editing:
  • “Sometimes the fun stuff gets edited out…this season they kept some of that fun, light feeling.” (Mayci, 73:17)

Timestamps for Major Segments

• 06:13 — Why Mayci’s story was left out of S1
• 10:26 — The real “naughty Mormon girl” inside Mayci
• 12:06–21:58 — Abusive relationship, blackmail, sexual assault, aftermath (strong content warning)
• 28:05–42:17 — Meeting Eric, teen pregnancy, his tragic death, dealing with grief and motherhood
• 32:45–36:41 — Mormonism, secrets at BYU, repentance, how she’d parent differently
• 44:12–57:51 — Single motherhood, telling her son about Eric, grief and forgiveness
• 58:56–64:18 — Fame, social media, and joining Mom Talk
• 65:05–72:03 — Friendship drama, reality TV dynamics, status with Whitney
• 73:17–74:25 — What’s ahead on Secret Lives of Mormon Wives and Taylor’s new show

Tone & Style

The conversation balances raw, vulnerable admissions (trauma, grief, shame) with Mayci’s wit and Amanda’s curiosity. The episode radiates a sense of honesty, hope, resilience, black humor, and the nuanced reality of balancing faith, motherhood, trauma, friendship, and public scrutiny.

Final Thoughts

A must-listen for fans of the show and anyone interested in the candid, often untold realities behind the public personas of reality TV stars. Mayci’s openness about abuse, grief, rebellion, faith, and friendships is both refreshing and impactful.

Mayci’s book “Told You So” is available now.