Not Skinny But Not Fat: “Venita Aspen Will Not Be Pushed Out”
Host: Amanda Hirsch
Guest: Venita Aspen (Bravo’s Southern Charm)
Air date: December 23, 2025
Episode Overview
Amanda Hirsch hosts Southern Charm’s Venita Aspen for a lively, frank, and wide-ranging conversation. They talk Bravo drama, reality TV friendships, handling social media hate, Venita’s experiences with castmates (Craig, Sally, Sierra, JT), and her budding romance with Carl from Summer House. Venita opens up about being pushed out of groups, tough moments on TV and in real life, and how she’s learned to protect her mental health in the spotlight.
Segment Breakdowns & Key Discussion Points
1. Pop Culture Catch-Up & Amanda’s Observations
[00:31-05:57]
- Amanda starts with a warm, informal check-in, featuring her signature banter on year-end clichés, Pete Davidson becoming a dad, and Instagram “memories.”
- Discusses Hailey Bieber’s pointed social post about Justin Bieber’s Spotify records and her shade at Scooter Braun’s team.
- Amanda’s love for “Actors on Actors” interviews: fascination with celebrity dynamics, why audiences love seeing stars interview each other.
- Segue: “Speaking of one of my obsessions…” Amanda introduces Southern Charm and today’s guest, Venita.
2. Venita Aspen Joins: Friendship & Real Life Behind the Show
[06:11-12:56]
- Venita chooses to stay in NYC to guest on the pod—awkwardness, champagne, and late-night adventures ensue.
- She recounts her first wild trip to The Box nightclub in NYC:
“Front row, Boom. Penis out, vagina, titties everywhere. I was like, where am I?” —Venita [07:11]
- Venita’s close friendship with Sierra: how they met (Venita slid into her DMs, [08:32]), how Sierra is like family, and how their bond gets overlooked by viewers.
- Value of real friendships versus “show friendships.” Venita notes constant online speculation:
“The comment that always gets to me the most is that people always say, I need real friends. And I’m like, guys, you think that I would hang around these people if I wasn’t actually, like, friends with them?” —Venita [11:28]
3. Navigating Internet Hate & Protecting Mental Health
[09:53-12:56]
- Venita avoids social media while the show airs:
“When the show’s airing, I'm not on social media at all. I don’t have it on my phone…I have a team that posts for me, so I just can't read or see anything that's negative.” —Venita [09:53]
- Amanda and Venita discuss how even a sea of love can be drowned by a few mean comments.
- Venita shares how deep comments about her character or “not having real friends” hurt more than surface-level critiques.
4. On-Screen Drama: Craig, Sally, and Being Pushed Out
[12:56-18:45]
- Venita confirms Craig refused to film with her, threatening her job:
“Yeah, he literally was refusing to film with me…that means I don’t have a job. That means I can’t hang out with my friends. That means I don’t have a platform…” —Venita [13:04]
- Describes dynamic with Craig: being sidelined for supporting Paige, feeling iced out for not “picking sides.”
- On reality TV, double standards among castmates:
“You boys fight all the time… you come back and you guys [say] things in confessionals…Are you gonna be done with that? I’m about to be like, oh my God…” —Venita [14:44]
- Venita is candid about the emotional toll:
“It was devastating. Like, a text message is so quick…” —Venita [56:49]
5. Friendship, Loyalty, and “Girl’s Girl” Drama
[18:46-42:28]
- Venita deeply values her friendships and explains her protective stance with Sally (she wanted to warn Sally about Craig, not pick a petty fight).
- Discusses parties and major moments from the current season—including supporting Sally after a difficult past relationship and warning her against more heartbreak.
- Amanda and Venita analyze the “girls’ girl” label, Sally’s boy-crazy tendencies, and reality TV “friend-inflation.”
- They confront fan speculation about Sally’s intentions on various reality shows (Bachelor, Southern Hospitality).
- Reflects on spreading “tea” about castmate Molly’s vaginal rejuvenation, the ethics of gossip, and quick forgiveness when you own your mistakes ([39:01]).
6. Past Romances, Group Dynamics & Who's Dating Who
[26:36-34:11]
- Venita clears up rumors: never actually hooked up with JT, though there was an off-camera flirtation. JT hid his real-life girlfriend from her, and the fallout was painful—he even blocked Venita everywhere.
- New romance! Venita shares a budding connection with Carl from Summer House—one date lasting five hours:
“We actually had to be asked to leave because we shut the place down.” —Venita [31:19]
- Carl is sober; Venita is thoughtful about it, asking in advance if it’s OK to drink.
- Amanda teases, “Second date?” Venita: “Yeah, I think so.” [67:05]
7. Southern Charm Cast Insights: Austin, Shep, Molly, and the Group
[33:11-42:35]
- Madison's protectiveness over Audrey, the Austen love triangle, and Sally’s sometimes wild confessions.
- Venita’s take on cast personalities: Shep’s unflappable confidence (“He has more confidence than I think anyone in this group…” [35:37]), the Molly/Sally animosity, and why some conflicts just don’t get resolved.
- “Accountability” is rare among the boys; Venita wishes there was more open adult conversation.
- Amanda and Venita detail literary-theme parties, “tiny butt” in-jokes, and group friendships.
8. Life Behind the Scenes: Joining the Show & Handling the Spotlight
[48:48-53:20]
- Venita joined Southern Charm in season 7 as a “friend of,” thanks to an invite from Leva.
- She never set out to be a “star,” and struggled with online cruelty after her first full season; “I was gonna quit,” Venita confides.
- Sutton Stracke (RHOBH) gave her the encouragement she needed to stay:
“You gotta show them that they didn’t win. So I came back.” —Venita [51:30]
- Social media strategy: Her aunt handles her accounts, she only uses Threads, and blocks toxic words.
9. Where Relationships Stand & Looking Ahead
[54:14-59:20]
- Venita and Craig still haven’t reconciled; she’s puzzled by his lasting anger.
“At the end of the day, whatever the issue is is so stupid. Why can’t we just get over it?” —Venita [54:49]
- Cast sometimes blocks each other, and Internet conflicts spill into real life.
- Amanda gently asks if Venita ever just approached Craig directly—she tried, but he wasn’t receptive. She notes many cast members are “afraid of Craig” (per a past Andy Cohen poll [57:48]).
- Discussion of Sally’s social media drama, Taylor’s recent “spicy” change, and tension with other castmates.
10. Favorite Moments, Family, & What Fans Don’t See
[62:28-67:09]
- Venita’s wish for viewers: more footage of her with her mom, who brings out her playful side.
“I wish you guys could see me and my mom together more. My mom brings out a side of me that I feel like doesn’t really come out with the group…” —[62:42]
- She’s the only Charleston native left on the show.
- BravoCon: Venita thrives on fan energy and relates a touching story of signing a fan’s collectible card and crying.
- Amanda closes by praising Venita’s resilience and teasing Venita’s “moment” on the show.
Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)
- “Front row, Boom. Penis out, vagina, titties everywhere. I was like, where am I?” —Venita [07:11], describing The Box
- “The comment that always gets to me the most is that people always say, I need real friends.” —Venita [11:28]
- “Yeah, he literally was refusing to film with me…that means I can’t hang out with my friends. That means I don’t have a platform… I lose so many things.” —Venita [13:04]
- “You boys fight all the time… you come back and you guys [say] things in confessionals…And I’m like, you boys fight all the time.” —Venita [14:44]
- “We actually had to be asked to leave because we shut the place down.” —Venita about her date with Carl [31:19]
- “Sutton…was like, girl, I’ve been sending you dms…You have to go back. You gotta show them that they didn’t win. So I came back.” —Venita [51:30]
- “At the end of the day, whatever the issue is is so stupid. Why can’t we just get over it?” —Venita [54:49]
Major Takeaways
- Venita's Resilience: She’s open about the emotional impacts of reality TV stardom—both its opportunities and its wounds—and the mental health steps she takes.
- Real & TV Friendships: The lines between cast, friends, “storylines,” and real support are complicated, but authentic connections (like with Sierra) are her anchor.
- Drama and Double Standards: Group loyalty is shaky, boys’ floor for forgiveness is lower, and women are judged more harshly for the same behaviors.
- Boundaries Online: Detoxing from social media isn’t just an act—it’s been key to Venita’s survival and return to the show.
- Looking Forward: New romance, old wounds, and a hope for more real (and healed) relationships for herself and the group.
This episode is a must-listen for Bravo fans, offering a raw, behind-the-scenes look at what it takes to survive reality TV—without losing your soul.