A woman takes over her dead sister’s dating profile in 'Dandelion is Dead'

Summary

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NPR's Book of the Day – "A woman takes over her dead sister’s dating profile in 'Dandelion is Dead'"

Air date: February 5, 2026
Host: Andrew Limbaugh (Intro/Outro); Interview by Juana Summers
Guest: Rosie Story, author of Dandelion Is Dead

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Episode Overview

This episode introduces Rosie Story’s debut novel, Dandelion Is Dead, a nuanced exploration of grief, identity, and the ethical complications of online dating. The narrative follows Poppy, a woman mourning her sister Dandelion, who begins posing as her deceased sibling on a dating app and accidentally ensnares a stranger, Jake, in her deception. Host Juana Summers and Rosie Story discuss themes of authenticity, moral ambiguity, and the messy nature of real life.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Premise: Grief Meets Catfishing

• Poppy's Motivation: While grieving her larger-than-life sister, Poppy stumbles onto her dating app profile and responds to a message from Jake pretending to be Dandelion, kicking off the story’s central moral dilemma.
• Author’s Inspiration: Rosie Story reflects on the tiny lies people tell online, asking, “What if the person you were pretending to be was actually dead?” ([01:33])

Notable Quote

• Rosie Story ([01:33]):
  “I was really thinking about how we all lie in tiny ways every day. You know, on dating apps, for example, we might be lying about presenting ourselves in a certain way, but what if…”

Real Online Dating: Drawing from Life

• Personal Experience: Story candidly shares her own history with dating apps, noting that both dating mishaps and heartfelt connections informed the book’s psychological depth.
• Writing as Catharsis: She references Nora Ephron’s idea that “everything is copy,” turning awkward dates into creative material ([02:52]).

Notable Quote

• Rosie Story ([02:52]):
  “A terrible date can be handy for writing… I've certainly brought in the kind of rich psychological territory of modern dating into this novel.”

Dual Narrative: Poppy & Jake

• The book alternates between Poppy’s and Jake’s perspectives, offering a rounded look at both the catfisher and the unwitting target.
• About Jake:
  • Divorced father, struggling with masculinity and authenticity.
  • Both protagonist and victim, he too is shaped by grief and societal pressure.
• Author’s Challenge & Joy: Rosie enjoyed shaping Jake’s emotional arc, highlighting male vulnerability ([03:42]).

Notable Quote

• Rosie Story ([03:42]):
  “Jake is struggling. He wants to be a good man, but he wonders if he can be. He doesn't necessarily feel masculine enough. He's also got his own grief that he's been pushing down. So through this book, he really has to face it.”

Grief as a Creative Engine

• Personal Loss: Story reveals the novel is informed by the loss of her own dear friend, imbuing Poppy and Dandelion’s relationship with emotional authenticity ([04:59]).
• Siblings as Complements: Dandelion is vivid, daring, often overwhelming; Poppy must redefine herself beyond her sister's shadow.

Notable Quote

• Rosie Story ([04:59]):
  “The experience of losing someone so vibrant and wonderful and, frankly, far too young absolutely influenced this book. With Poppy and her sister Dandelion, I see them as a yin and a yang, two halves of a whole.”

Embracing Messiness & Moral Ambiguity

• No Clear Villain: The story resists easy moral categorization. All characters are flawed, echoing the complexities of real life.
• Intentional Imperfection: Story sees the ‘messiness’ as essential: people grow and find happiness by muddling through mistakes ([06:00]).

Notable Quote

• Rosie Story ([06:00]):
  “For me, I just think life is messy whether we see it from the outside or not. People make mistakes and they do things the wrong way, and it's about making those mistakes and getting to the place you want to be.”

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Memorable Moments & Timestamps

• Catfishing as grief processing ([01:46]): Introduction of Poppy pretending to be her deceased sister on a dating app.
• Dating app nostalgia ([02:22]): Rosie’s reflections on the launch and evolution of Tinder and dating apps.
• Writing Jake’s emotions ([03:42]): The pleasure and challenge of authentically drawing a man’s interiority.
• Depth of loss ([04:59]): Story linking the novel’s grief to her personal bereavement.
• “Messy” as a merit ([06:00]): The author defends her choice to give readers no obvious moral compass.

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Episode Tone

Candid, empathetic, and contemplative. Rosie Story’s openness about grief and imperfection matches Juana Summers’ thoughtful, earnest questions. The episode balances vulnerability with wit, offering a thoughtful look at difficult ethical territory without judgment.

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Concluding Note

Rosie Story’s Dandelion Is Dead is out now, offering a nuanced portrayal of how we reinvent ourselves—sometimes unethically—while confronting life’s messier emotions. The conversation encourages readers to embrace complexity and recognize that real life rarely offers tidy resolutions.

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Listen for:

• A disarmingly honest dive into online dating’s highs and lows ([02:52])
• Unpacking how writing about flawed, hurting people can foster empathy ([06:00])
• Powerful insights on how loss can reshape identity and narrative ([04:59])

Transcript

[Andrew Limbaugh]

Hey, it's NPR's Book of the Day. I'm Andrew Limbaugh. Remember that reality TV show from a while back called Catfish? It was about people who pretended to be someone they weren't while dating. Online, I've seen a decent amount of it, and the person catfishing was often portrayed as a creep or a loser, but I imagine they all had full, rich, complicated lives that led to their catfishing ways. In Rosie Story's novel Dandelion Is Dead, our main character is on the dating apps pretending to be someone she isn't. That someone is her dead sister. And in this interview with NPR's Juana Summers, story talks about writing a book with no clear good guys or bad guys, where everything is messy and nobody is perfect because that's just how life is. More after the break.

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[Juana Summers]

Can something good come from a foundation built on a lie? That is the question at the heart of a new novel from British writer Rosie Story.

[Rosie Story]

I was really thinking about how we all lie in tiny ways every day. You know, on dating apps, for example, we might be lying about presenting ourselves in a certain way, but what if.

[Juana Summers]

The specific lie on a dating app is that the person you're pretending to be is actually dead? That's how the book, aptly titled Dandelion is Dead begins. It's about a 30something woman named Poppy who, while grieving her older sister Dandelion, finds Dandelion's phone and gets into her dating app.

[Rosie Story]

One particular message catches her eye. It's From Jake, a 40 year old man who says that he can feel Dandelion's heat. And there's something about that message that compels Poppy to reply and accidentally catfished Jake.

[Juana Summers]

I spoke to author Rosie Story about what inspired this book, her first ever published. I have to say, as I was reading the early parts of this book when Poppy is just starting to talk to and communicate with Jake as Dandelion, it definitely took me back to the really early days of being on dating apps myself, when it seemed like there was just unremarkable experience after unremarkable experience. But every once in a while, there'd be just like this little bit of a spark, this little bit of a promise, that part of the story focused on online dating. Did any of that come from your own experiences?

[Rosie Story]

Oh, big time. I too, I remember when Tinder launched in the UK in 2012. And, you know, embarrassingly, I still know what dating apps are like. I've been on all the dating apps over the years, a little bit for research, but certainly in my own kind of quests for love. And it's definitely helpful that I am a writer and as Nora Ephron famously said, everything is copied because a terrible date can be handy for writing. And so I've certainly brought in the kind of rich psychological territory of modern dating into this novel.

[Juana Summers]

So the story is. It's told through two perspectives. We hear about it and learn about this world from Poppy's perspective, but also from Jake's. The man who is at the other end of those hench messages. Tell us about Jake.

[Rosie Story]

I adore Jake. He's a divorced father and he's figuring life out. For me, this book is really about personal authenticity and how hard it can be to be ourselves and the journey towards that. And Jake is absolutely on that journey himself. And it was so fun to write a man, I must say, for once, being in control of a man's emotional journey was wonderful. I'm absolutely fascinated in societal pressures, both on women, but also with men. I mean, Jake is struggling. He wants to be a good man, but he wonders if he can be. He doesn't necessarily feel masculine enough. He's also got his own grief that he's been pushing down. So through this book, he really has to face it.

[Juana Summers]

You wrote in the note inside the book that you lost a dear friend. And first of all, I just want to say I'm so sorry.

[Rosie Story]

Thank you.

[Juana Summers]

I wonder what did the experience of losing someone that you cared about so much, what did that teach you about grief that found its way into the book, into how we see Poppy grapple and live with the reality that she's lost her sister?

[Rosie Story]

The experience of losing someone so vibrant and wonderful and frankly, far too young absolutely influenced this book. With Poppy and her sister Dandelion, I see them as a yin and a yang, two halves of a whole. So where Dandelion is really vibrant and confident and sometimes aggressive and lascivious, Poppy sees herself absolutely in the shadow of. Of her sister. And she has to work out who she is when she's not in contrast to her big sister.

[Juana Summers]

One of the things that I really loved about this book, but that also was really challenging to me as I was reading it, is that I could never quite figure out who I was supposed to root for. Everyone in this book, Poppy, Jake, even Dandelion, though she's dead, they're all imperfect and just so messy, making these choices that are sort of nebulous and in a gray area. Was that intentional?

[Rosie Story]

Everyone has definitely been pointing out that it's a messy story and my characters are messy, but for me, I just think life is messy whether we see it from the outside or not. People make mistakes and they do things the wrong way, and it's about making those mistakes and getting to the place you want to be. So my characters are absolutely imperfect and messy, but. But I adore them. I root for them all the way. And I hope the readers will by the time they get to the end as well.

[Juana Summers]

Author Rosie Story's debut novel, Dandelion Is Dead, is out now. Rosie, thank you.

[Rosie Story]

Thank you.

[Andrew Limbaugh]

And just a reminder that signing up for book of the day plus is a great way to support NPR's book coverage and public media. And you'll get to listen to every episode, so sponsor free. So please go find out [e-mail] BookOfTheDay.

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