'Clutch' follows a college friend group trying to maintain their bond in midlife

Summary

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NPR's Book of the Day: 'Clutch' Follows a College Friend Group Trying to Maintain Their Bond in Midlife

Episode Date: February 23, 2026
Host: Andrew Limbong (Intro), Interview by Juana Summers
Guest: Emily Nemens, Author of Clutch

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Episode Overview

This episode centers on Emily Nemens’ novel Clutch, which traces the evolving dynamics of a group of five female friends as they navigate midlife: careers, marriages, children, and distance. Using the modern vernacular of group chats, the novel explores how these women maintain their decades-long connection despite physical and emotional separations. Nemens speaks with NPR’s Juana Summers about the nature of adult friendship, the challenges and catharses of writing about timely issues such as reproductive rights, and the emotional tolls of life events like addiction and grief within a longstanding social circle.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Role of Group Chats in Modern Friendship

• Group chat as device: Nemens explains that the group chat is not only a central communications tool for her characters but also structurally helps track the complex timelines and multiple perspectives in the book.
• Authenticity to current experience: The use of text messages mirrors how real-life friendships are maintained across long distances and busy lives.
  • Quote:

    “It felt very much like the vernacular of now…so much of it has been by text. And so that felt very true.” — Emily Nemens (02:19)

Navigating Adult Friendships and Life’s Changing Seasons

• Midlife complexity: The novel focuses on friends entering their 40s, a time when identities and relationships often change, and friendships can become both more precious and more complicated.
• Gaps and reconnection: Nemens wanted to explore the “beats of distance" and how friends may unintentionally let one another down, only realizing gaps in support in hindsight.
  • Quote:

    “Only after the fact, when we reconnect, I’m like, wow, you just had the hardest month of your life and I didn't know about it…But you also have to acknowledge the gap and try again.” — Emily Nemens (03:48)

Character Study: Greg, Politics, and Protest

• Inspiration for Greg: Greg, a progressive Texas politician in the novel, resonates with figures like Wendy Davis and Michelle Wu. Nemens clarifies Greg wasn't directly based on Davis, but embodies the frustrations and hopes Nemens felt post-Dobbs decision regarding reproductive rights.

  • Quote:

    "She's got some Michelle Wu going as well...A politician that’s back on the job with a very, very, very young child because, you know, governing takes every day." — Emily Nemens (05:02)

• Writing protest as catharsis: A pivotal scene of political confrontation was particularly cathartic for Nemens, marking a more direct form of writing protest than in her past work.

  • Quote:

    “This is the first time I've sort of written quite so directly about how I feel and how mad I am about it...not every piece of art needs to be so direct…but it felt like this one did.” — Emily Nemens (06:00)

Grief, Addiction, and Support in Friendship

• Funeral scene and eulogy: The novel includes a powerful scene at a funeral for a friend’s husband who died from addiction. The eulogy centers on the imperfect but earnest love between the couple, and the grief of those left behind.
  • Quote:

    "Her friends see this difficulty and really go, mama bear...And Bella rises to the occasion and really says what needs to be said, which is...they tried their best. And this is a terribly sad moment, but we’re so grateful that they knew each other and loved each other.” — Emily Nemens (07:08)

Art Imitating Life: How Writing Changed the Author

• Reinforcement of friendship’s power: Nemens shares how working through the themes of the novel affirmed the role of deep friendship in her own life, especially during real-life crises.
  • Quote:

    “I spent a couple years thinking about, you know, the dimensions of friendship and it just really reaffirmed the power of friendship for me.” — Emily Nemens (08:21)

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Notable Moments & Quotes

• On group chats as lifelines:

  “Is the one I have with my college buddies a bastion of deep conversation and intelligent thought? No, of course not. It’s mostly dumb memes, but when life stuff does happen, well, I’m thankful it’s there.” — Andrew Limbong (00:02)

• On missed chances in friendship:

  “I've definitely dropped the ball as a lot of my friends have become mothers. I wanted to support them, but certainly didn’t know how, having not had children myself...” — Emily Nemens (03:48)

• On direct protest writing:

  “There’s a lot of exclamation points on that page. Right. Not every piece of art needs to be so direct...but it felt like this one did need to be that way.” — Emily Nemens (06:00)

• On the lasting core of friendship:

  “Our friendships wax and wane but really hold steady at their core is a thing that, you know, I just, I value it so highly...” — Emily Nemens (01:37)

• On art imitating (and influencing) life:

  “I would like to think that I would have done that had I never written Clutch. But I just, I spent a couple years thinking about...the dimensions of friendship and it just really reaffirmed the power of friendship for me.” — Emily Nemens (8:21)

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Important Timestamps

• 00:02 — Host’s personal reflection on group chats as friendship lifelines
• 01:17 — Introduction to Clutch and its focus on enduring female friendships
• 02:03 — Discussion on the use of group chat as narrative device
• 03:48 — Nuanced look at distance, silence, and reconnection in long-term friendships
• 05:02 — Inspiration for the character Greg and parallels to real-life politicians
• 06:00 — Catharsis and activism in writing about reproductive rights
• 07:08 — The funeral scene and reflections on addiction, grief, and support
• 08:21 — How writing the novel affected Nemens’ understanding of her own friendships

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Conclusion

This thoughtful episode offers listeners a look into Emily Nemens’ Clutch—a novel that vibrantly captures the ebb and flow of lifelong friendship in a digital age and amidst the weight of contemporary issues. Nemens’ candid discussion surfaces the guilt, growth, and gratitude that come with such relationships, and how both fiction and life require us to show up for our chosen families when it matters most.

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Transcript

[A]

Hey, it's NPR's Book of the Day. I'm Andrew Limbong. Not to be annoyingly millennial, but I don't really understand how previous generations kept in touch with their old friend groups without the group chat. Is the one I have with my college buddies a bastion of deep conversation and intelligent thought? No, of course not. It's mostly dumb memes, but when life stuff does happen, well, I'm thankful it's there. The novel Clutch follows a group of female friends throughout decades, and author Emily Nemens uses the group chat as both a storytelling device and the thing that keeps these friends together. Nemens talks to NPR's Juana Summers about exploring the distance in long term friendships.

[B]

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[C]

friendships that last decades stretch across distance careers, marriages, children, and sometimes there are long periods of silence. Author Emily Nemens explores the complexities of female friendship in her new novel Clutch. It follows five women who have known each other since college as they navigate the challenges of midlife.

[D]

Watching these women grow and get to know themselves and having our friendships wax and wane but really hold steady at their core is a thing that, you know, I just, I value it so highly and I wanted to think about the possibilities of that sort of beyond my own lived experience. But thinking about a group of women who are trying to do that same work of holding on to one another,

[C]

the demands of life mean that the women are rarely all physically together. They remain connected through their group chat. I asked author Emily Nemens why she decided to use this medium as the thread that connects them.

[D]

Well, Lana, you're probably on a group chat, right?

[C]

Many, many, many.

[D]

So it felt very much like the vernacular of now. And that was part the other reason I wanted to use those text messages is there's five people who are friends. They've only been in touch the last several years. So much of it has been by text. And so that felt very true. And then I think the third reason that I really wanted to lean into the text is there's five storylines and it's complicated and I needed to do a little bit of signposting to help the reader understand, okay, we're, you know, two hours later, we're two weeks later, we're moving through time. And, you know, these women have known each other for 20 years. Sometimes, you know, a weekend goes by in a blink, and sometimes, you know, one day in court can feel like forever.

[C]

I think one of the things that I found so interesting, and I've read a number of books recently that center on female friendships, is that the five women at the center of your book, they are either in their 40s or nearing 40. They're dealing with the issues of midlife in which so many of our relationships change, our identities change, friendship, at least for me, can feel complex at times. And there's this really lovely turn of phrase you use in the book. I won't spoil the context around it for our audience, but you write that one of the women would recognize and admit that the start's tiny, but Snowball's negligence of friendship happened among them all the time. So, Emily, I wonder, was there something about those gaps in long term friendship, those beats of distance in midlife that you wanted to explore or expose?

[D]

When you're a young adult and living on your own for the first time, having your friends around, that's sort of your immediate family on a certain level, and that it's hard, but it's almost easy to show your love and be supportive because it's immediate. And then as life gets more complicated, I've definitely dropped the ball as a lot of my friends have become mothers. I wanted to support them, but certainly didn't know how, having not had children myself and so feeling out those moments where only after the fact, when we reconnect, I'm like, wow, you just had the hardest month of your life and I didn't know about it. And you can apologize and you can be more present, but you also have to acknowledge the gap and try again to be a better friend and the opportunity, ask for a new opportunity to be there for the people you love.

[C]

One of the women in your book, Greg, is a progressive politician in the state of Texas, and she's at the center of this fight in her state and around the country for reproductive freedom. And I have to be honest that I could not help but think of Wendy Davis, the former Texas state senator, as I was reading her character. Was that intentional?

[D]

Not directly, no. I mean, I started writing this book soon after the Dobbs decision, and I was thinking about how to find a character that could express a lot of my feelings about what was happening. To women's health in America. And so I looked at Wendy Davis sort of convergent evolution. You know, she's got some Michelle Wu going as well in terms of. Terms of being a politician that's back on the job with a very, very, very young child because, you know, governing takes every day.

[C]

The scene in the book where Greg is interrupting an anti abortion rights lawmaker and banging her cowboy boots on the desk over and over again and speaking out, yelling out really about the need to protect the lives of women in her state, just felt so timely and so poignant. I wonder if, given the massive shift in reproductive rights that we're living through in, was there any level of catharsis for you kind of spelling that out and writing about it?

[D]

Oh, absolutely. You know, I. Despite that scene, I'm usually a pretty subtle writer. And, you know, I think about the things I care about and the causes I care about, but this is the first time I've sort of written quite so directly about how I feel and how mad I am about it. And, you know, there's a lot of exclamation points on that page. Right. You know, not every piece of art needs to be so direct and so pointed and so explicit about its protest, but it felt like this one did need to be that way.

[C]

The scene that has stuck with me and I found it so powerful is one that takes place at a funeral. One of the women in the book's husband struggles with addiction. He dies of an overdose. And the friends come together again at the funeral. And one of the friends finds herself unexpectedly addressing those gathered and deliverers this gorgeous eulogy. And it ends with her noting her gratitude for both members of the couple, the living and the dead one, for trying their best each and together. And it just gutted me. Can you talk a little bit about that scene? Yeah.

[D]

Thank you. So, you know, it was a painful scene to write and to imagine. And the husband who's been struggling with addiction, you know, I think I could have written a whole other book about his experience, but this one was really focused on the woman who loved him and cared about him and was so frustrated and heartbroken. I really wanted to sit with and live with her experience of both the tragedy, but also other people's anger and frustration and sadness and how she might absorb all of that. And turns out it's very hard. And her friends see this difficulty and really go, mama bear. And Bella rises to the occasion and really says what needs to be said, which is, you know, they loved each other and no one's perfect. And they tried their best. And this is a terribly sad moment, but we're so grateful that they knew each other and loved each other.

[C]

Yeah. As you sort of constructed and lived with and sat with these women and their friendships with each other, did they reveal anything that was surprising to you about your own friendships and relationships?

[D]

In the course of editing the book, I was sort of elbow deep in edits and a friend got a cancer diagnosis and needed help after surgery. And, you know, I just wrote this whole book about showing up for your friends and, you know, we watched a lot of bad movies and whenever I could I got back into the red pen and the revisions on the book. And, you know, I would like to think that I would have done that had I never written Clutch. But I just, I spent a couple years thinking about, you know, the dimensions of friendship and it just really reaffirmed the power of friendship for me.

[C]

Author Emily Nemens her new book, Clutch is out now. Thank you so much.

[D]

My pleasure.

[E]

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