Lena Dunham on her memoir 'Famesick' and the intense bond between 'Girls' co-stars

Summary

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NPR's Book of the Day — Lena Dunham on 'Famesick' and the Intense Bonds Behind 'Girls'

Date: May 7, 2026
Host: Melissa Nadworny
Guest: Lena Dunham
Main Theme:
Lena Dunham reflects on her memoir Famesick, exploring the challenges and peculiarities of fame during her twenties as the creator and star of HBO’s Girls, the decade that shaped her, and the profound, complex bonds among the cast.

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Episode Overview

Melissa Nadworny interviews Lena Dunham about her new memoir, Famesick. The conversation delves into Dunham's rapid ascent to fame, the personal and professional challenges she faced, her reflections on the "Girls" era (2010–2020), and the unique relationships with her co-stars and collaborators—most notably, the deep bonds formed with fellow actresses and the complicated dynamic with Adam Driver.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Spanning a Decade: Defining the Era of 'Girls'

• Timeline Covered in Famesick
  • Dunham explains the book's span: “The book basically goes from 2009 to 2021, but it really focuses on the period between 2010 and 20... What do we call 2010-2020? Was it the—it's not the aughts. What do we call that? I don't know. A nightmare. Do we call it a nightmare, Rachel?” (02:07)
  • She describes the decade as both magical and tumultuous: “Those years… had a lot of magic… a lot of education. And there was also some really challenging stuff that… at the time… had become pretty normalized for me.” (02:42)

Sudden Fame and Youthful Inexperience

• Age and Perspective

  • On starting Girls at 24:
    “We shot the pilot in the fall of 2010, when I… recently turned 24.” (03:13)
    • Dunham jokes about her youth: “I literally said, recently, someone said, ‘I'm 24.’ And I said, ‘You should still be inside your mother. Like, what are you doing walking around?’” (03:26)
  • She describes her early fascination with Hollywood and the surreal feeling of joining its ranks.

• Being Unprepared for the Spotlight

  • Dunham discusses lacking "media training" and facing the “Wild West” nature of the early 2010s internet:
    “When I see young people in the public eye now... there's a different kind of consciousness... And this was sort of the Wild West.” (04:43)

  • The balancing act of intense creative demands, introversion, and chronic health issues:
    “I need a lot of time alone… And I also have chronic health issues… I didn’t have any language around, because...for women, the delayed diagnosis for so many of these things is huge. So all of that was hitting at the same time.” (05:06)

  • Humor and pain are both present: “There’s a lot of comedy to it because it’s funny to be, you know, standing at the Met Gala unprepared or talking to Barbara Walters about anal sex or whatever may befall you. But there was also a lot of pain and confusion and fear.” (05:59)

The Cast of ‘Girls’: Chosen Family & Intense Bonds

• Indelible Friendships
  • On the closeness among the cast:
    “It was beautiful. I feel like they'll be my sisters always. There are things I experienced with Sasha and Jemima and Allison that no one else will ever understand. But when we were together, you always knew that there was a hand that you could reach over and squeeze… It was a very powerful, formative relationship.” (06:35)
  • On growing up together:
    “Zasha and Allison were 22 when we started. Jemima and I were 24.” (07:01) “We felt like they were like our little sisters. We were like, we know so much that you’re gonna know when you have two more years of life, you’re gonna know what to do. Then you’ll know.” (07:13)

The Complex Dynamic with Adam Driver

• Adam’s Unexpected Role

  • Adam Driver was not planned as a series mainstay:
    “He was not meant to be necessarily moved through the six seasons of the show...he was gonna play… the boyfriend of the week... He was so clearly… had this...gravitational pull… and he...stayed with us...and cared so much about that character.” (07:33)

• Notable Incident: Tension on Set

  • Dunham recounts an intense altercation:
    “You include this scene when you were in a fight… he let his anger get the best of him. And he threw a chair at the wall that you were standing against. It didn't hit you, but that’s a frightening experience.” (08:16)
  • Why she included it:
    “I think it was really important to me to make it clear in the writing that it was not. He did not hurt me. His aim was great. He didn't get me. He was in some way trying to get my attention...we were almost like two different species circling each other in the woods...so clearly now, you know, 15 years later, that we were missing each other's signals.” (08:46)
    • She reflects on their differences and missed signals: “Adam is from Mishawaka, Indiana. I come from downtown New York...we were formed in really different ovens...we were clashing.” (09:40)
    • Dunham describes herself as extremely non-confrontational, while Adam was “someone who thrived on honesty and intensity.”
  • Closure and mutual respect:
    “There's also a scene later in the book when the show ends and we're hugging and we're crying...I sort of apologized… and him sort of saying it was all as it was supposed to be. And he's...in Star Wars, so he gave me that Jedi wisdom and he was out. So all hail Adam Driver. Deep gratitude, deep appreciation, and I hope that that can be felt in the writing.” (10:50)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On the decade covered:
  “What do we call 2010–2020? Was it the—it’s not the aughts. What do we call that? I don’t know. A nightmare.” — Lena Dunham (02:14)

• On youth and fame:
  “You should still be inside your mother. Like, what are you doing walking around? I mean, it was a truly wild thing to be given access to this job that I was—had such reverence for.” — Lena Dunham (03:26)

• On her castmates:
  “When we were together, you always knew that there was a hand that you could reach over and squeeze...It was a very powerful, formative relationship.” — Lena Dunham (06:39)

• On the conflict with Adam Driver:
  “We were almost like two different species circling each other in the woods. And I can see that so clearly now, you know, 15 years later, that we were missing each other's signals.” — Lena Dunham (09:20)

• On closure with Adam:
  “He’s...in Star Wars, so he gave me that Jedi wisdom and he was out. So all hail Adam Driver. Deep gratitude, deep appreciation, and I hope that that can be felt in the writing.” — Lena Dunham (10:54)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Theme/Tone of Book: 02:07–03:07
• Youth and Fame: 03:13–04:35
• Internet, Health, and Coping: 04:43–06:21
• The 'Girls' Cast Bonds: 06:21–07:23
• Adam Driver’s Role & Relationship: 07:23–10:54

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Conclusion

In this candid and engaging conversation, Lena Dunham reflects on her decade in the spotlight as both a personal journey and a social phenomenon. Famesick confronts the intoxicating highs and disorienting lows of fame, the complexities of formative work relationships, and the invaluable bonds of chosen family. Dunham’s stories and observations are infused with both humor and honesty, offering an intimate look at the price and privilege of building a life in public.

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Transcript

[Melissa Nadworny]

Hi, I'm Melissa Nadworny and this is NPR's book of the Day. Lena Dunham got famous more than a

[Lena Dunham]

decade ago for creating and starring in

[Melissa Nadworny]

the HBO Show Girls, about 20 something women trying to figure out how to

[Lena Dunham]

be in the world.

[Melissa Nadworny]

In her latest memoir, Fame Sick, she

[Lena Dunham]

similarly grapples with how to be in

[Melissa Nadworny]

the world in a way that feels honest and creative without letting that openness and vulnerability turn turn into a liability. She spoke with NPR's Rachel Martin on the Wildcard podcast.

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When Survivor premiered, it helped usher in a new era of reality TV. The show has evolved over its 50 seasons and fans have debated changes to the game for years. So what's the best Survivor season of all time? We'll get into it on NPR's Pop Culture Happy Hour. Listen via the NPR app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Melissa Nadworny]

We're going to pull out of the game and talk about your book Fame Sick. It's just a wonderful read. So let's get into some of the themes in it. First, the time bands, because this is about a particular decade right of so

[Lena Dunham]

the book basically goes. The book basically goes from 2009 to 2021, but it really focuses on the kind of period between 2010 and 20. It's sort of like there's a little Pre precursor in 2009, a little coda in 2021, but it's really about that decade between. It's really about. What do we call 2010-2020? Was it the it's not the aughts. What do we call that? I don't know. A nightmare. Do we call it a nightmare? Rachel?

[Melissa Nadworny]

I think.

[Lena Dunham]

Do we call it my personal Hell no. It's about those years which did have a lot of magic in them and a Lot of joy and a lot of education. And there was also some really challenging stuff that looking back, I can. Looking back, I'm able to see how. What a thicket I was moving through. But at the time, that had become pretty normalized for me.

[Melissa Nadworny]

So can you ground us in time? I mean, how old were you when you started Girls?

[Lena Dunham]

We shot the pilot in the fall of 2010, when I was. I recently turned 24. And then you're, like, barely out of

[Melissa Nadworny]

the womb, like, it must be said, 24.

[Lena Dunham]

Well, I see that now. Like, when I see. I literally said, recently, someone said, I'm 24. And I said, you should still be inside your mother. Like, what are you doing walking around? I mean, it was a truly wild thing to be given access to this job that I was. Had such reverence for. And also this world of, you know, I had always been a kid who loved films and who was interested in Hollywood and who, you know, read Us Weekly on Wednesdays. Not every. It came out on Wednesdays, and I would pick it up at the newsstand near our house. Not because I wanted. Had some idea that I wanted to be famous, because I was just like many young people compelled by this. The narrative magic of these Hollywood lives. And so suddenly, to be engaging with actors and making this work was unbelievable. And then for it to then be sort of welcomed into some kind of cultural conversation and to be kind of have the. The carpet laid out for you. But I was not prepared for everything that came with that.

[Melissa Nadworny]

How could you be? I mean, it's just. It's huge. It was so huge. It's hard if people. Younger people won't remember. But this was such a phenomenon.

[Lena Dunham]

And you were thrust in the spotlight, you know, young. When I see young people in the public eye now, there's much more of people know the term media training. They understand that what the Internet is and what it's capable of doesn't mean that they don't get up to trouble. But there's a different kind of consciousness if you've grown up with it. And this was sort of the Wild west, so. So these years were very dense with creative education. And I had amazing. I mean, Judd Apatow was my television mentor, and he took me through this process, and I worked with an incredible cast and an incredible crew. But I also was extreme feeling. I am by nature, which sometimes I'm very introverted. I think if we're defining introvert by sort of being around people either gives you energy or reduces your energy, not based on how loud your Voice is. Which I think was the old definition. And I need a lot of time alone. I need a lot of time to recharge. And I also have chronic health issues that I've had my whole life that I didn't have any language around, because we know that especially for women, the delayed diagnosis for so many of these things is huge. So all of that was hitting at the same time. And so the book is a lot about grappling through this. And there's a lot of comedy to it because it's funny to be, you know, standing at the Met Gala unprepared or talking to Barbara Walters about anal sex or whatever may befall you. But there was also a lot of pain and confusion and fear.

[Melissa Nadworny]

The way you write about your castmates from Girls in the book is so lovely. I mean, it wasn't just a regular work relationship or even regular friendships. Like, it was such an intense bonding experience that you all had.

[Lena Dunham]

It was beautiful. I feel like they'll be my sisters always. Like, there are things I experienced with Sasha and Jemima and Allison that no one else will ever understand. But when we were together, you always knew that there was a hand that you could reach over and squeeze. Like, you always knew there was someone's head you could put your lap in. Lap you could put your head in. Or, like, the other way. And it was. It was a very powerful, formative relationship. I mean, those were. Zasha and Allison were 22 when we started. Jemimah and I were 24.

[Melissa Nadworny]

You guys grew up together?

[Lena Dunham]

Yeah. And we felt like they were like our little sisters. We were like, we know so much that you're gonna know when you hit. When you have two more years of life, you're gonna know what to do. Then you'll know.

[Melissa Nadworny]

Adam Driver is someone. You also had a close relationship. The degree to which you could. With who he is. And you write about it in the book. He was such an important part of

[Lena Dunham]

that show, and he's such a defining. He was not meant to be necessarily moved through the six seasons of the show. He was meant to be this sort of. In a little bit of the way that Sex and the City is like the boyfriend of the week. I think that was more the role that he was gonna play. And he was so clearly just had this. That character just had this gravitational pull, and it was clear that. And he. And his career exploded. And to his credit, he stayed with us, and he stuck it out, and he cared so much about that character. Yeah.

[Melissa Nadworny]

You two had a complicated relationship with things Is the easiest way to put it.

[Lena Dunham]

Yeah.

[Melissa Nadworny]

And at one point in the book, you include this scene when you were in a fight about something related to the show. And he got angry and he let his anger get the best of him. And he threw a chair at the wall that you were standing against. It didn't hit you, but that's a frightening experience. And as a reader, you take. It's jarring to read that. And that feels very scary and explosive. And I guess my question is, why did that feel like a detail you wanted to include?

[Lena Dunham]

I think it was really important to me to make it clear in the writing that it was not. He did not hurt me. His aim was great. He didn't get me. He was in some way trying to get my attention. He was trying to. And something that we were always coming up against, which I think I was trying, is that you have these work relationships with people that you might never encounter in regular life. Like, Adam and I have different interests. We come from different places. We have had really different life stories. Adam is from Mishawaka, Indiana. I come from downtown New York. Adam had been through the military and Juilliard. I had had this sort of hippy, dippy liberal arts education. We were formed in really different ovens. But I think it was really important to me to show that we were sort of doing the best we could to understand each other. But we were almost like two different species circling each other in the woods. And I can see that so clearly now, you know, 15 years later, that we were missing each other's signals. We were both had just inherent qualities that were very. I'm extremely non confrontational. I am like a. I will do anything to keep it sweet. All my confrontation, I can do it on camera, but off, it's very hard for me. And I think sometimes that surprises people because my writing is considered provocative or intense. But. And he was someone who thrived on, like, honesty and intensity. And he also was someone who needed a lot of space. And I was somebody who felt like, you know, we should all be besties at the slumber party. And we were clashing. And so I wanted to find a way to talk about that. And I felt like that particular incident made it very clear sort of how deep at times the frustration ran on both ends. But then there's also a scene later in the book when the show ends and we're hugging and we're crying. And he kind of said, I sort of apologized to him for. I'm sorry for any times I misunderstood you or for any times that I didn't give you what you needed. And him sort of saying it was all as it was supposed to be. And he's I mean, he was in Star wars, so he gave me that, gave me that Jedi wisdom and he was out. So all all hail Adam Driver. Deep gratitude, deep appreciation, and I hope that that can be felt in the writing.

[Melissa Nadworny]

Thanks so much for listening. If you like this conversation, I would recommend my episode with the creator of another hit HBO show, Issa Rae. Issa and I talk about the impressive career moves she has made since creating and starring in Insecure. And she tells me about the fateful Paris trip she did not end up taking.

[Lena Dunham]

Check it out.

[Melissa Nadworny]

This episode was produced by Courtney Theofin and Lee Hale. It was edited by Dave Blanchard and mastered by Becky Brown. Wildcard's executive producer is Yolanda Sangweni and our theme music is by Ramtin Arablouei. You can reach out to [e-mail] we're going to shuffle the deck and be

[Lena Dunham]

back with more next week. Talk to you then.

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