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Andrew Limbong
Hey, it's NPR's Book of the Day. I'm Andrew Limbong. What do we owe our childhood friends? It's easy to be a kid and say, oh, this is my best friend. We're gonna be thick as thieves forever. Now anyone who's grown up knows that that's not necessarily true, but that doesn't mean there isn't a strong bond there. These are questions explored in the new novel When We Ride by Rex Ogle. In this interview, he talks to NPR's Aisha Roscoe about his own best friend growing up and how their diverg paths in life meant certain boundaries had to be put up. Which, as he says, is hard to do when you love someone. That's after the break.
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Aisha Roscoe
17 year old Diego Miguel Benavidez, or Benny, is studying hard and working a low paying job as a busboy. He's trying to graduate high school, go to college and make his mother proud. He's also got a childhood friend named Lawson who's taking a different path.
Rex Ogle
Lawson says I need a ride. He always needs a ride. I don't mind because I've never had a brother, but if I did, I'd want him to be just like Lawson. He's my ride or die, though preferably without the dying. Plus, Lawson always pays for gas. He pays with two crisp ten dollar bills or four worn tired fives or twenty faded and wrinkled ones found in his pocket. The same tens and fives and ones he earns selling weed. I try not to mind. It's just weed, right?
Aisha Roscoe
That's Rex Ogle reading from his new novel in Verse when we ride. And he joins us now. Welcome to the program.
Rex Ogle
Oh, thank you so much for having me.
Aisha Roscoe
Let's start with Benny's ride. It's on the COVID Tell us about this car and what it meant to him.
Rex Ogle
Everyone has their first car and it's, it's such a memory. You can smell it, you can feel it. Especially if it's an old beat up Cadillac. My best friend, she had this giant 1967 Cadillac and we called it Big Bertha. And when she drove it she had to turn that wheel around and around and around and around. And, I mean, it was like sailing a massive boat. But it's, you know, Benny's first ride. It's big. He gets it from his mom. She's like, you need this car more than I do. I could take the bus to work. For him, it's a source of pride, but it's also something that enables him. It gives him power, especially in a world where he doesn't have much.
Aisha Roscoe
This novel takes place during Benny's senior year. And it's month by month. He's really focused on his future, and his goals are so different from Lawson's. Why are they such close friends? What draws them to each other?
Rex Ogle
You know, it's one of those friendships where you meet when you're a kid. You survive an event together, something small. In this case, it was bullying. Lawson stood up for him. And in that way, Benny was like, wow, this guy's taking care of me when I didn't have a father, take care of me. And of course, Lawson doesn't have a father either. It doesn't take a lot. But when you're there for each other, especially when you don't have a male role model in your life, okay, we have to look out for each other.
Aisha Roscoe
But those differences, it's one thing when you're both 10 and you're playing Mario Kart, but by the time you get to their age, which is like 17, they're seniors. That's when those differences can really start to come into focus. Do you mind reading another poem from the book that gets at this?
Rex Ogle
Yeah, no problem. When I step out, I'm wearing dirty shoes, holes in them, jeans, baggy, holes in them, used shirt from Goodwill, backpack that I've had since middle school with stains on it. When Lawson steps out, he's wearing new shoes, bright white jeans, baggy, brand new, new shirts, new polos, new jacket, gold chains around his neck, matching gold earrings with tiny diamonds in them. He looks pimp og and I look broken, which I am. Am I jealous? I'd be lying if I said no.
Aisha Roscoe
Things are going to get bad between Benny and Lawson, and they kind of have these friendship breakups several times during the school year. But it just seems like Benny and Lawson, like, they can't quit the friendship. Why can't Benny leave Lawson alone, you think?
Rex Ogle
At least for me, you know, my best friend was dealing drugs. This was a reality. But the thing was, was he was a good kid doing bad things for good reasons. He was supporting his mom. Who had a drug addiction. He was taking care of his third grade brother. He didn't want to be selling drugs. But, you know, I was working at Crystal's Pizza and Spaghetti Warehouse, cleaning tables, being a busboy, going back in the dishwasher and getting paid $3.85 an hour. And he's like, dude, he's like, you can make so much more dealing drugs. I just. That's a line I won't cross. So for me, Marshall, like, I loved him, he was my best bud, but I was trying not to judge him, but I was judging him. I think now as an adult, I have a different perspective.
Aisha Roscoe
What do you think we owe our friends in situations like that? What is the thing that we owe to our friends who've been there with us for years and since we were young and have supported us?
Rex Ogle
That's such a hard question because, I mean, as an adult, I come from a place of privilege and wisdom that I know things now that I wish I'd known when I was 15. I've been homeless, I've been super poor. I've dealt with domestic violence, the death of a sibling. Like, I have lived through a lot. I am the smartest 15 year old around. But then my best friend, you know, I'm trying to go to school and he's like, just take me to this one drug deal in my head. I'm like, I'm risking everything. Like, sorry, that's a good question. Like, what do I owe him? And to me, I need to decide where the line for me stops. And that's a really hard line to draw in the sand, Especially when you love someone.
Aisha Roscoe
I mean, this is a story and obviously there are these tough circumstances, but because this is for young readers, did you feel any pressure to pull your punches or to soften the story?
Rex Ogle
I've been writing kids books for a while, and there are publishers and editors who are like, no, you can't say that. You have to pull it back. But I feel like these stories are so important because this is reality. This is the truth of what kids are living through today. And I feel very privileged because I had an abuela who pushed me every day, every step of the way. Get an education, work hard. I think a lot of people who come from where I do don't or they get stuck. I'm really grateful to be able to tell a story that is. Feels honest and true and lived in.
Aisha Roscoe
What happened to Marshall? What happened to your best friend?
Rex Ogle
So it's a very different ending than the book I introduced him to my other best friend. I had two best friends my senior in high school. Marshall was a drug dealer. Casey was class president. She was a straight A student, blonde hair, blue eyes, beautiful, went to church. I introduced them. I hated it. I was so mad. I was so jealous because they fell in love. She got pregnant pretty soon after his leukemia came back from when he was a kid. He passed, but their daughter is my goddaughter. It just makes me so happy that I have her, really.
Aisha Roscoe
So much of Benny and Lawson's identities are part of the stories that they tell themselves about who they are, about what they could become. And it made me think about, like, how much of our destinies are determined by our circumstances and how much of it is determined by the kinds of decisions we make. What do you think of that?
Rex Ogle
I mean, I remember when I was in my 20s, like, I'd survived a lot and. And I was embarrassed and I was ashamed of where I came from. And it was infuriating because, you know, now I look back and I'm like, why were you ashamed? You didn't fail yourself. Society failed you. It wasn't your fault that you did what you did to survive. It wasn't Marshall's fault that he did what he did to survive. We didn't choose those situations. We were born into it and society perpetuated it. And man, it just drives me nuts because it's so easy for people to look at kids who are dealing drugs and be like, you're a bad person. You don't know anything about them. You know one thing thing. Talk to them. Talk to them and you'll find out why.
Aisha Roscoe
That's Rex Ogle. His new book is called When We Ride. Thank you so much for talking with us today.
Rex Ogle
Oh, thanks for having me.
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Summary of NPR's Book of the Day: Rex Ogle's 'When We Ride'
NPR's Book of the Day, hosted by Aisha Roscoe, delves into Rex Ogle's poignant novel-in-verse, 'When We Ride', a compelling exploration of friendship strained by divergent life paths. Released on April 16, 2025, the episode provides an in-depth look into the novel’s themes, character dynamics, and the author's personal insights.
Aisha Roscoe opens the discussion by introducing Diego Miguel Benavidez (Benny), a 17-year-old grappling with the pressures of adolescence. Balancing academics and a low-paying job as a busboy, Benny aspires to graduate high school, attend college, and make his mother proud. His life is intricately tied to his childhood friend, Lawson, whose path starkly contrasts Benny's ambitions.
Aisha Roscoe [01:08]: "17-year-old Diego Miguel Benavidez, or Benny, is studying hard and working a low-paying job as a busboy. He's trying to graduate high school, go to college, and make his mother proud. He's also got a childhood friend named Lawson who's taking a different path."
Ogle paints a vivid picture of Benny and Lawson's friendship, highlighting their deep bond despite their differing aspirations. Lawson's reliance on Benny for rides symbolizes their interdependent relationship.
Rex Ogle [01:28]: "Lawson says I need a ride. He always needs a ride. I don't mind because I've never had a brother, but if I did, I'd want him to be just like Lawson. He's my ride or die, though preferably without the dying."
Through their interactions, the novel delves into themes of loyalty, sacrifice, and the complexities of maintaining friendships amidst life's challenges.
The conversation shifts to the heart of the novel—how friendships evolve as individuals embark on different life journeys. Ogle emphasizes the significance of shared experiences in forging strong bonds, especially in the absence of male role models.
Rex Ogle [03:17]: "You know, it's one of those friendships where you meet when you're a kid. You survive an event together, something small. In this case, it was bullying. Lawson stood up for him."
As Benny and Lawson transition into their senior year, their diverging paths bring underlying tensions to the surface, testing the resilience of their friendship.
Ogle draws from his own life experiences to enrich the narrative of 'When We Ride'. He reflects on his friendship with two best friends—Marshall, a drug dealer, and Casey, a high-achieving student—to illustrate the complexities of personal relationships and societal expectations.
Rex Ogle [07:37]: "So it's a very different ending than the book I introduced him to my other best friend. I had two best friends my senior in high school. Marshall was a drug dealer. Casey was class president."
These personal anecdotes lend authenticity to the novel, portraying the nuanced realities faced by many young individuals.
Addressing the responsibility of portraying difficult truths in literature for young audiences, Ogle discusses the balance between honesty and sensitivity. He emphasizes the importance of reflecting real-life struggles to resonate with readers authentically.
Rex Ogle [06:58]: "I feel like these stories are so important because this is reality. This is the truth of what kids are living through today."
Ogle acknowledges the constraints imposed by publishers but remains steadfast in presenting unfiltered narratives that mirror the experiences of contemporary youth.
The dialogue delves deeper into the moral dilemmas inherent in Benny and Lawson's friendship. Ogle contemplates the responsibilities one bears towards friends engaged in harmful activities, exploring the thin line between support and enabling.
Rex Ogle [06:03]: "I need to decide where the line for me stops. And that's a really hard line to draw in the sand, especially when you love someone."
This introspection underscores the novel's exploration of ethical boundaries and the emotional toll of navigating troubled relationships.
In wrapping up, Ogle reflects on societal judgments and the importance of understanding the underlying factors that lead individuals to make certain choices. He advocates for empathy and dialogue as tools to bridge gaps and foster genuine connections.
Rex Ogle [08:41]: "It wasn't your fault that you did what you did to survive. It wasn't Marshall's fault that he did what he did to survive. We didn't choose those situations. We were born into it and society perpetuated it."
'When We Ride' serves as a testament to the enduring bonds of friendship amidst adversity, offering readers a heartfelt examination of personal growth, accountability, and the enduring impact of shared histories.
Final Note: Rex Ogle’s When We Ride is a vital addition to young adult literature, presenting an unflinching look at the challenges faced by teenagers today. Through its lyrical verses and authentic characters, the novel invites readers to reflect on their own relationships and the societal forces that shape their lives.