Feeling Like You Want The Thoughts - OCD Recovery

Summary5 min read

Podcast Summary: Feeling Like You Want The Thoughts

OCD Recovery with Ali Greymond — November 16, 2025

Episode Overview

In this episode, Ali Greymond tackles a nuanced manifestation of OCD: when intrusive thoughts present not just as anxiety-producing, but as urges or desires—moments where it feels as if you “want” the thought or event to happen. Ali’s aim is to normalize this experience, reassure listeners, and offer practical strategies to respond without falling into the OCD trap.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The “Urge” or “Desire” Dynamic

Core Concept: The feeling that you want an intrusive thought or have an urge is another disguise OCD uses.
- “Instead of it giving you anxiety, it feels like you actually want the thought. So it comes as an urge or as a desire.” (00:17)
- Common in themes like Harm OCD or Religious OCD, but can happen with any OCD spectrum.
OCD’s Trick: The initial urge/desire is quickly followed by fear about the urge itself — a double-layered compulsion trap.
- “You get scared of you feeling like you want the situation… it just comes in slightly different, but in terms of OCD, it’s just the way OCD sends it to you.” (00:55)

2. Normalizing and De-personalizing the Experience

Not Unique or Dangerous:
- Ali emphasizes that feeling like you want the thought does not make you dangerous or unique.
- "I hear this all the time. And OCD will tell you, but what if I will be the first person that ever does something… Don’t buy it.” (02:10)
OCD’s Manipulation: The way the thought comes feels different, but it isn’t fundamentally new. OCD is simply shifting tactics.
- “It might feel like it’s different. It is not. Your OCD just twisted it a little bit to get you into a reaction.” (01:02)

3. Strategy: Refuse to React

Ali’s Mantra: Respond to these urges with deliberate indifference.
- “Just look at it as. Nice try OCD, I’m not buying it.” (01:30)
- "All the urges, all the desires in the world—don’t care. Moving forward." (01:40)
OCD’s Lie: However real it feels, remember, “OCD is selling you a lie. Don’t buy into it. Even if it feels very real.” (01:50)
How Real It Feels Isn’t Proof: Intensity of anxiety reflects the intensity of OCD, not the truth of the thought.
- “How real it feels depends on the level of OCD you have… If your anxiety is 10 out of 10, it feels 10 out of 10 real.” (02:10)

4. Ignore the Form, Focus on the Response

Urge, Image, Dream—Same Principle: No matter the content (urge, image, memory, dream), your approach should be consistent.
- “It can come in as an image, as an urge, ‘I want this,’ ‘What if it happened and I forgot?’ It can come in a million different ways… but it’s still OCD.” (02:27)
The Pasta Metaphor: Different “sauces,” same “pasta.”
- “How I always say, right, that under red sauce, under white sauce, still pasta. We’re not reacting.” (02:43)

5. What to Expect During Recovery

Initial Persistence: The first few times you resist reacting, symptoms might worsen; that’s normal.
- “At first, things will not get a little bit better because OCD will try harder… but within the first few weeks, you will notice the difference.” (02:55)
Don’t Try to Force the Thoughts Away: Let the thoughts, urges, or images exist in your mind; don’t chase or suppress.
- “Don’t try to wish the thoughts away. Don’t push the thoughts away. Just let them have space in your mind. They’re there, you’re here, you’re focusing on daily life. Let them be there.” (03:25)

6. Summary Attitude and Recovery Mindset

Final Advice:
- “Yeah. Urge, image, desire, whatever, whatever. You’re over there, I’m over here. You can stay there as long as you want. I’m doing my own thing now.” (03:40)
Show No Fear: Fear gives OCD power.
- “If you show fear, like, ‘I have to make this go away, this is very scary…’ you’re actually showing your brain that you’re scared and your brain will send you more of this.” (03:50)
Choose to Not React:
- “Don’t take it seriously because it feels like you want it. It’s the same exact thing. Choose not to react. You will not be wrong.” (04:15)

Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

Reframing the Experience:
- “Nice try, OCD, I’m not buying it.” (01:30)
- “OCD is selling you a lie. Don’t buy into it.” (01:50)
- “How I always say, right, that under red sauce, under white sauce, still pasta. We're not reacting.” (02:43)
On the Intensity of OCD:
- “How real it feels depends on the level of OCD that you generally have.” (02:10)
On Letting Thoughts Be:
- “Don’t try to wish the thoughts away. Don’t push the thoughts away. Just let them have space in your mind. They're there, you’re here, you’re focusing on daily life. Let them be there.” (03:25)

Timestamps for Important Segments

00:17 — Introduction to the “urge/desire” experience in OCD
01:02 — Reassurance: It’s not a new OCD theme, just a new tactic
01:30 — “Nice try OCD”: The attitude of indifference
02:10 — On the “realness” of the feeling
02:43 — Pasta metaphor for OCD’s different disguises
02:55 — What to expect when you stop reacting
03:25 — How to let thoughts and urges exist without fear or resistance
03:50 — Dangers of showing fear and why not to suppress
04:15 — Final encouragement and summary strategy

Conclusion

Ali Greymond’s concise episode provides clarity and comfort around a confusing OCD experience: feeling like you want the intrusive thought. Her practical advice—refusing to react, treating all intrusive content with indifference, and not fearing the persistence—empowers listeners to take the next steps toward recovery with less self-judgment and more confidence.

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Transcript1 lines

[00:01]
A
Hi, everyone. I'm Ali Graymond. Today I just wanted to talk to you about a topic I don't think I've actually discussed before. And this topic is when thoughts come in and it feels that instead of it giving you anxiety, it feels like you actually want the thought. So it comes as an urge or as a desire. So you have to understand that this is just another way OCD comes in. Because what happens is it comes in this way, and then. So it comes in as an urge, or you feel like you want the thought, you want the situation to happen, whatever. Usually this has to do with harm OCD or sometimes religious ocd. You feel like you want this, and then what happens? And then you get scared. So the anxiety is still there. So you. Instead of getting scared of. Of the situation, you get scared of you feeling like you want the situation. It's exactly. It's. It's exactly the same thing. Basically. It just comes in slightly different, but in terms of ocd, it's just the way OCD sends it to you. So look at it as. This is not. It might feel like it's different. It is not. Your OCD just twisted it a little bit to get you into a reaction, and it gives you this. Well, but I felt like I actually did want it. I actually felt the urge. I felt like I was actually gonna do it. I felt like I actually wanted to do it. Right. Those are kind of the hallmarks of this type of thought, I would say. It's not really a theme. This can be present in a lot of different themes, but this kind of way, OCD twists it. So just look at it as. Nice try ocd. I'm not buying it. I'm telling you. I hear this all the time. And OCD will tell you, but what if I will be the first person that ever does something, and da, da, da. And I have to check and I have to figure it out? Don't buy it. Don't fall for it. Just say, nice try ocd. Yep. All the urges, all the desires in the world don't care. Moving forward. Don't buy what it's selling you. Look at it as, this is a lie. OCD is selling you a lie. Don't buy into it. Even if it feels very real. You know, OCD always feels very real. How real it feels depends on the level of OCD that you generally have. So if your anxiety is 10 out of 10, it feels 10 out of 10 real. If your anxiety is 8 out of 10, 8 out of 10 real. Right. So the Fact that it feels real, the fact that it feels, it comes in as an urge, means absolutely nothing. It can come in as an image, as an urge. I want this. What if it happened and I forgot? It can come in in a million different ways. Look at it as, this is just OCD coming in under different kind of circumstances, situations, but it's still ocd. How I always say, right, that under red sauce, under white sauce, still pasta, we're not reacting. And you will see when, once you refuse reaction, you know things. I mean, at first, things will not get a little bit better because OCD will try harder to get you into a reaction. But within the first few weeks, you will notice the difference of this. So again, don't get discouraged. If it's like, well, I refuse the reaction one time, why am I not better? Right? It's going to take quite a few times. But if you are paying attention to the thought and if you are paying attention to the urges, you're going to get more urges. Another way, for example, OCD comes in is in dreams. If you start to worry, well, why am I dreaming of this now? The more you worry, why am I dreaming? The more dreams you're potentially going to get. So, so look at it as, I have to refuse reaction. The more I refuse reaction, the less this is going to happen, you know, the less thoughts are going to come in. But at the same time, don't try to wish the thoughts away. Don't push the thoughts away. Just let them have space in, in your mind. They're there, you're here, you're focusing on daily life. Let them be there. Okay? Yeah. Urge, image, desire, whatever, whatever. You're over there, I'm over here. You can stay there as long as you want. I'm doing my own thing now. You know, that has to be your attitude because if you show fear, like, I have to make this go away, this is very scary. I don't want to have these urges, I don't want to have these thoughts. Then you're actually showing your brain that you're scared and your brain will send you more of this, you know, so you just have to give it space over there. However it comes in, it doesn't matter. Don't take it seriously because it feels like you want it. It's the same exact thing. Choose not to react. You will not be wrong. I hope you find my videos helpful. Thank you so much for watching. I will see you tomorrow. If you haven't subscribed to the channel, please subscribe. If you would like to do recovery program with me. All the Information is on youhavocd.com. you can sign up from there. Thank you for watching. I'll see you tomorrow.