Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster - Episode 291: Julian Clary (Live in London) Summary

Release Date: May 5, 2025

In Episode 291 of "Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster," the beloved British comedians, Ed Gamble and James Acaster, host a vibrant live session at the London Palladium featuring none other than the effervescent Julian Clary. This episode blends humor, personal anecdotes, and culinary dreams, creating a memorable experience for both the audience and listeners.

1. Introduction and Setting the Stage

The episode opens with Ed announcing additional dates for "Off Menu Live" at the Royal Albert Hall, setting an enthusiastic tone for the live recording. Although the transcript includes several advertisements in the early minutes, the main content kicks off prominently around the 3-minute mark when Julian Clary is introduced.

Notable Quote:

• Ed Gamble [03:30]: "It's a live episode of Off Menu from the London Palladium, recorded 21st of March, 2025. Very excited because our special guest is the wonderful Julian Clary. A true national treasure."

2. Welcoming Julian Clary

Ed and James warmly welcome Julian Clary, immediately establishing a friendly and humorous rapport. Julian's witty remarks and playful interactions with the hosts set the stage for an engaging conversation filled with laughter and candid moments.

Notable Quotes:

• James Acaster [04:17]: "We're very honored to share the stage with Julian."
• Julian Clary [07:23]: "Yes, well, it wouldn't do for us all to be the same, would it?"

3. Discussing the Dream Meal Format

Ed explains the concept of "Off Menu," where guests select their favorite starter, main course, side dish, dessert, and drink. Julian is then guided through this culinary journey, sharing his preferences and personal stories related to each choice.

Notable Quote:

• James Acaster [05:38]: "Together we own a dream restaurant. And every single week we invite in a guest. We ask them to order their dream starter, main course, side dish, dessert, and drink, not in that order."

4. Dream Starter: Enhanced Pumpkin Soup vs. Deep Fried Du de Montaigne Cheese

Julian is presented with two intriguing starter options. He recounts a humorous and somewhat scandalous story about discovering "Du de Montaigne cheese" under unexpected circumstances, highlighting his penchant for unexpected culinary experiences.

Notable Quotes:

• Julian Clary [17:05]: "I wolfed that cheese down in one sitting and it was delicious."
• James Acaster [17:16]: "That was really interesting!"

5. Dream Main Course: Southern Indian Fish Stew

Choosing the main course, Julian opts for a Southern Indian fish stew, sharing a poignant yet humorous childhood memory that gives depth to his aversion to meaty stews. His storytelling provides insight into his personal tastes and the origins of his culinary preferences.

Notable Quote:

• Julian Clary [27:03]: "It's sort of Southern Indian, I think, quite coconutty and it's delicious."

6. Dream Side Dish: Ladies Fingers (Okra) with Rice or Mango Chutney

For his side dish, Julian selects "ladies fingers," also known as okra, paired with rice and mango chutney. The conversation includes playful debates about pronunciations and the texture of okra, adding a layer of humor to the culinary discussion.

Notable Quote:

• James Acaster [35:35]: "Ladies fingers. Any other options?"
• Julian Clary [32:02]: "Okra. Okay. And rice, of course."

7. Dream Drinks: Nigel Havers's Vodka Martini and Pale White Wine with Ice

Julian's drink selection is a highlight of the episode. He requests a specially made vodka martini by Nigel Havers, a staple in the London Palladium pantomimes, and prefers a very pale white wine with large ice cubes. His detailed description of Nigel's martini preparation adds a theatrical flair to the conversation.

Notable Quotes:

• Julian Clary [36:38]: "It would have to be made by Nigel Havers... he brings me to my room with a couple of cheese straws in the top pocket of his perfectly pressed shirt."
• James Acaster [39:17]: "So you want a very pale white wine with one large cube of ice in it as your dream drink."

8. Dream Dessert: Pavlova with Dragon Fruit and Pomegranate

Ending the meal on a sweet note, Julian chooses pavlova adorned with dragon fruit and pomegranate. He fondly reminisces about his mother's homemade pavlova, juxtaposed with the modern twist of exotic fruits, illustrating his blend of traditional and contemporary tastes.

Notable Quotes:

• Julian Clary [49:36]: "I love a knob in my baguette. Sometimes a knob."
• James Acaster [51:24]: "Would you like your mother to tip the remainder of the pavlova down your dad's shirt?"

9. Reviewing the Dream Meal and Final Banter

Ed and James recap Julian's dream meal, ensuring all elements are covered. The hosts and Julian engage in further humorous exchanges, including playful jabs and witty retorts, maintaining a lively and entertaining atmosphere until the episode's conclusion.

Notable Quote:

• Ed Gamble [58:34]: "Nigel Haver's vodka martini with a twist. And he can back out of the room and not stay for the meal."
• Julian Clary [58:55]: "Sounds lovely. Exactly what I want. Thank you."

10. Closing Remarks and Future Engagements

As the episode draws to a close, Ed and James inform listeners about Julian's ongoing tour and upcoming shows, promoting both Julian's performances and future "Off Menu Live" events. Julian's charismatic departure leaves the audience with a sense of joy and anticipation for more episodes to come.

Notable Quotes:

• Julian Clary [59:15]: "Bye bye."
• James Acaster [60:19]: "See you. Bye Bye."

Highlights and Insights

• Humorous Storytelling: Julian's anecdotes, such as the incident with the "Du de Montaigne cheese" and his mother's pavlova, infuse the episode with humor and personality.

• Culinary Preferences: The detailed discussion of meal choices offers listeners a glimpse into Julian's tastes and the thought process behind dream meals.

• Engaging Banter: The interplay between Ed, James, and Julian showcases the hosts' chemistry and Julian's quick wit, making the episode both entertaining and relatable.

Conclusion

Episode 291 of "Off Menu" stands out as a delightful fusion of comedy, personal storytelling, and culinary exploration. Julian Clary's vibrant personality and the hosts' engaging interactions create an episode that is both entertaining and informative. Whether you're a fan of the podcast or new to it, this episode offers a taste of the unique blend of humor and heart that "Off Menu with Ed Gamble and James Acaster" is celebrated for.