LIZZO EXCLUSIVE: “Releasing The Weight Has Affected People” The Real Transformation Story She’s Never Shared Before

Summary

Podcast Summary: "LIZZO EXCLUSIVE: 'Releasing The Weight Has Affected People' The Real Transformation Story She’s Never Shared Before"

Podcast Information:

• Title: On Purpose with Jay Shetty
• Host: Jay Shetty, hosted by iHeartPodcasts
• Episode Featuring: Lizzo
• Release Date: April 7, 2025

Overview: In this deeply personal and transformative episode of "On Purpose," Jay Shetty sits down with celebrated artist Lizzo to delve into her unshared stories of transformation, mental health struggles, and the profound journey of self-discovery that has shaped her latest album, "Love in Real Life." The conversation spans Lizzo’s battles with anxiety and depression, her innovative use of sound baths, her relationship with astrology, and her commitment to authenticity amidst fame.

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1. Introduction and Setting the Stage [02:39 - 04:22]

Jay Shetty warmly welcomes Lizzo to the show, expressing admiration for her performances and setting a comfortable environment for an open and honest dialogue.

Key Quote:

Jay Shetty [04:00]: “Oh, my gosh, Lizzo, it is so great to have you here. I have been wanting to do this for years. We're such huge fans here.”

2. Lizzo’s Experience with Sound Baths [04:22 - 08:08]

Lizzo shares her initial skepticism and eventual profound experience with sound baths, explaining how this practice aided her emotional healing during challenging times.

Key Quotes:

Lizzo [05:22]: “I had my first panic attack ever, and I had this thought. I was just like, you want to die? Okay, well, just die. Like, nobody will care.”

Jay Shetty [08:00]: “There’s a sense that sound and frequency has an impact on us. And this is just taking it to another level.”

3. Astrology as a Tool for Personal Growth [08:08 - 14:50]

The discussion shifts to Lizzo’s profound connection with astrology, detailing how understanding her astrological chart has empowered her to navigate personal and professional challenges.

Key Quotes:

Lizzo [10:32]: “We have a house years. And so 2023, I was in a 12th house year, and that's the year of hidden enemies. That's the year of shadow work.”

Jay Shetty [13:42]: “How are you using it for personal growth and self-growth? Like, how do you use that as...”

4. Navigating Fame and Personal Identity [14:50 - 23:06]

Lizzo discusses the complexities of fame, the disconnect between her public persona and her true self, and the challenges of maintaining authenticity under scrutiny.

Key Quotes:

Lizzo [03:28]: “The weight that is no longer on me is not just fat or physical. I released so much to get to this point, and to be honest with you, I don't feel like I've expressed myself fully in the last two years.”

Jay Shetty [22:35]: “It was like, I had to do my biggest one, you know?”

5. The Creation of "Love in Real Life" [23:06 - 37:12]

Lizzo elaborates on the emotional and creative process behind her new album, revealing how her personal struggles fueled the music, leading to a powerful and authentic body of work.

Key Quotes:

Lizzo [24:03]: “My album's done. Like, this is my job. I am a musical artist. I make studio albums.”

Jay Shetty [30:39]: “And one of the things that I think you talked about there, which is so powerful, is you go through something really difficult on the other side of it. There's this love in real life.”

6. Overcoming Depression and Embracing Solitude [37:12 - 51:11]

The conversation dives into Lizzo’s battle with depression, her strategies for overcoming isolation, and the importance of self-care practices such as meditation, exercise, and disconnecting from digital noise.

Key Quotes:

Lizzo [40:27]: “I worked really hard, and I can't remember, it was like 2017... I realized, oh, that's like, you know, I see something online, I'm like, I go down the rabbit hole.”

Jay Shetty [50:14]: “It's like, sometimes you just gotta shut the up.”

7. The Power of Self-Love and Acceptance [51:11 - 74:24]

Lizzo emphasizes the significance of self-love, detailing how being kinder to oneself can radiate positivity outwardly, reducing negativity and fostering a supportive environment for others.

Key Quotes:

Lizzo [73:22]: “Self-love can save the world because it starts with you.”

Jay Shetty [74:24]: “That is real.”

8. Final Five: Quickfire Insights [85:18 - 89:07]

In the closing segment, Lizzo answers Jay’s “Final Five” questions, offering listeners concise yet profound insights into her philosophy and personal growth.

Key Answers:

1. Best Advice Received: “Know who you are and whose you are.”
2. Worst Advice Received: “It. Bitch. Crash out.” (Lizzo humorously admits she said it to herself.)
3. Chapter of Life: “Freedom.”
4. Morning and Night Rituals: Starts mornings with a wave of gratitude and ends nights with prayers for loved ones.
5. One Law for Everyone: “Design this world not knowing how you would be born in it so that everybody can live happily.”

Key Quote:

Lizzo [88:44]: “We are the only person in control of you. And you have to take responsibility for that.”

9. Closing Reflections [89:07 - 90:10]

Jay Shetty commends Lizzo's vulnerability and the impactful nature of her story, highlighting how her journey can inspire listeners to embark on their own paths of self-discovery and healing.

Key Quote:

Jay Shetty [89:02]: “That is so good. I love that. I've never heard that before.”

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Conclusion: This episode offers an intimate glimpse into Lizzo’s journey of releasing emotional and psychological burdens to embrace authenticity and self-love. Through candid conversations, Lizzo not only shares her personal struggles and triumphs but also provides valuable insights into mental health, the power of sound healing, the role of astrology in personal growth, and the importance of maintaining genuine relationships. Jay Shetty’s empathetic interviewing style allows Lizzo to openly discuss her transformation, making this episode a source of inspiration and encouragement for listeners seeking their own paths to happiness and healing.

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Notable Quotes:

• Lizzo [05:22]: “I had my first panic attack ever, and I had this thought... nobody will care.”
• Lizzo [14:50]: “I've learned to use my alchemy and turn it into gold and turn it into meaningfulness and like acts of rebellious joy.”
• Jay Shetty [30:39]: “There's the depression, the darkness, the isolation, the worry, the fear.”
• Lizzo [73:22]: “Self-love can save the world because it starts with you.”

Transcript

[Jay Shetty]

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[Jay Shetty]

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[Lizzo]

It's not me anymore. Whoever Lizzo is to the world is not really even me. And that disconnect is depressing.

[Radhi Devlukia]

The Grammy goes to Lizzo.

[Jay Shetty]

What's making you Feel like now's the right time and what's giving you the confidence and courage to feel that way.

[Lizzo]

I think what I learned about fame is even if that's really me, it just becomes kind of like character. It's a brand that now doesn't belong to you anymore. There was a huge scandal I was dealing with a lot. Sometimes I feel like the world just.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Don'T love me back.

[Lizzo]

I had my first panic attack ever, and I had this thought. I was just like, you want to die? Okay, well, just die. Like, nobody will care.

[Jay Shetty]

I think it's also hard when the things that you stand for are the same things that you're being scrutinized for.

[Lizzo]

So when I pop out on a red carpet or when a video suddenly goes viral and my body's different, it appears like it was overnight. The weight that is no longer on me is not just fat or physical. I released so much to get to this point, and to be honest with you, I don't feel like I've expressed myself fully in the last two years.

[Jay Shetty]

Health and Wellness podcast.

[Lizzo]

Jay Shetty.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Jay Shetty.

[Jay Shetty]

The one, the only Jay Shetty. Oh, my gosh, Lizzo, it is so great to have you here. I have been wanting to do this for years. We're such huge fans here. And the last time I saw you, you were performing live at Cannes Lions. You were on stage for the iHeart Festival. I was out there and I'd been told that I had two front row seats reserved so that I could hear you.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

Now, what happened is I came into the event, I got into a few conversations. My podcast producer, who's in the back right now, was meant to take me to this seat. She's such a big fan that she forgot to take me to this seat. So by the time I wanted to make it to this seat, the whole crowd was covered. She was dancing in the front row. She claims. She claims you said to her that you were really proud of her dancing skills or shouted something out at her in a really cool way. I'll have to verify what it was, but I didn't get to be front row, so I was sitting at the back enjoying your music from the back.

[Lizzo]

Well, you're front row now, baby.

[Jay Shetty]

I know, I know. How lucky am I?

[Lizzo]

From the center.

[Jay Shetty]

How lucky am I? But no, honestly, we're such big fans here, and like I said, we've been looking forward to this, and even the first few seconds, we've just been pow wowing and going back and forth. It's been awesome.

[Lizzo]

Oh, yeah, You've been chatting it up, honey.

[Jay Shetty]

I love it. All right, well, I want to ask you. I saw that video on your Instagram. You were standing in a sound bowl hitting. I have not been to that class yet. I have not seen that before. So what am I doing wrong?

[Lizzo]

Well, you don't have my mama and my sister, because that was a Christmas gift from them. I remember on Christmas Day, they got me this. It was, like, a huge thing that they dragged in. It was wrapped, and I was like, what could y'all have possibly gotten me in this? Huge. And they were like, we're so excited. And I unwrapped it, and I was like, is this like a water bowl? And they're like, no, you. And I saw the footprint. There's feet. Like, footprint, big feet. Prints in it. They're like, you stand in it. And I was like, and then what? And it's like. And then you sound bath. And I'm like, this is actually wild. And so I was having, like, a. A really emotional day. I was like, I was very close to crash out. I dragged it outside, took my shoes off, put my feet in the earth for a second, stood in it, and just rang it. And I was like, I still don't feel better. I was like, I still don't feel better. And then I hit it. I kept hitting it. And I was like, oh, this is kind of fun. And it. Yeah. Changed my day. I pulled. I brought out my other bowls, and I sat, and I just hummed and played them. It literally changed my day. And I was actually. I was pessimistic about it. I was like, this is not going to work.

[Jay Shetty]

And that was the first time you tested it out?

[Lizzo]

That was the first time I tested the. Since Christmas. I tested the big one out.

[Jay Shetty]

Wow.

[Lizzo]

Yeah. I was shocked.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah. Because I've never seen one with footprints. Like, I've never seen one that you stand in. I've seen ones that you lie down and they play them at your head, or sometimes they come and put a crystal on your chest.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

Like, I've been in those, and I love them. We actually did one with my team. We do a team retreat every year, and we did one last year, but we did it outdoors, and we had this amazing sound healer come and lead it. And when we woke up, we all could see, like, shooting stars. What is going on? And then we realized it was Neuralink. It was Elon Musk's, like, you know, it was just this thing.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Whatever it is.

[Jay Shetty]

I can't remember what it's called. But we all woke up thinking, like, we could see something magical. But it is such an amazing experience to have sound heal you in that frequency. Did it finally work when you were standing in it?

[Lizzo]

Like, yeah, my ankle started itching and I was like, what's going on? For, like, ants were calling on my ankles and I kept scratching at them and I was like, oh, that's. It's waking. It's wake. It's awakening me. It's so funny because I host these. I call them ass rams once a year. So it's like these little retreats that I do for all of the black women in my life that I love and I care about, and it's. It's like an emotional and spiritual reset. And we do sound baths in the morning, and we do sound baths at night. And this one time I was laying there and I, like, allowed myself to really just, like, go. And it was so trippy. We all saw the same thing. I was like. Because she was asking everyone, they were like, yeah, I saw, like, pink and purple. And it was like, yeah, I saw pink and purple. And it was like. And I saw a galaxy. And was like, I saw a galaxy. So we all kind of like, it's real.

[Jay Shetty]

Yes, yes, yes.

[Lizzo]

I have. I have too much proof that there's something else going on out here. And it's all kind of guided by vibration. Yeah, it's all led by vibration.

[Jay Shetty]

Absolutely. And. And on a very, very base level, if someone hasn't tried it out, A, they should try it out, and B, it's like, we all know that sound makes us feel a certain way. There's songs from your past that make you feel nostalgic. There's music that can make you cry instantly. There's sounds that make you feel thoughtful and reflective. We all now work to lo fi beats or whatever it is on YouTube playlists. And there's a sense that sound and frequency has an impact on us. And this is just taking it to another level.

[Lizzo]

So the way I like to describe it, because I'm very, like, science in. Woo. Woo.

[Jay Shetty]

Yes.

[Lizzo]

Like, I.

[Jay Shetty]

Me too.

[Lizzo]

I think I'm a Taurus. So, you know, I need, like, grounding of it. We're constantly vibrating. I think when people hear vibration, they think like, okay, girl. Like, oh, we're on a vibe. I'm like, no. You know, your heart is beating constantly. Your blood is coursing through your veins, and you're, like, made mostly of water. So when your heart is beating, it's sending a vibration through your entire Body, like, if you sit still enough, you can feel, like, the vibration. So it's like everything is constantly vibrating, and you can vibrate high and you can vibrate low, and you actually have the power to control that. And once I learned that, I was like, oh, it's like a cheat code to life, to existing, so.

[Jay Shetty]

Well said. I love that. And did the playing of the sound bows come naturally to you?

[Lizzo]

I can play anything. I found that, like, I can, like, if I lick my finger and I have a crystal glass, I can make a sound. I think that's just one of my gifts is that, like, when I was a kid, I played recorder, and then I played flute, and then I played piccolo, and then I can play clarinet, and I can play piano, and now I play guitar. So I think with sound bows, I think I just am an instrumental piano list, and it's an instrument. Give me an instrument, and I'll make a beautiful sound.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, that's impressive because it's not easy to do. It's pretty challenging, so that's awesome. I. I can't. I'm the guy who can't even whistle, so let alone, like.

[Lizzo]

Wait, so you can't do the bow?

[Jay Shetty]

No, no, no, no, no. It's hard. It's hard. My wife's a bit better than me. We have. We have a few beautiful ones at home, but it's hard.

[Lizzo]

Oh, I can really make them sing to where your ears start to. It gets, like, really loud in your ears, and you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Is somebody in there with, like, a bowl in my head? That's how it start to feel.

[Jay Shetty]

Sometimes I need to come to one of your ass rooms. If I go, oh, my God, we're.

[Lizzo]

Gonn to everybody very soon.

[Jay Shetty]

I love it. That's so fun. And, Lizzo, I know you're huge into astrology, right? Like, that's something that you're really passionate about. I was wondering, have you ever had a conversation with an astrologist that really changed your life? Something they said that just shifted everything?

[Lizzo]

Yes. Chani Nicholas is my astrologer. And so every eclipse season, I'm texting her. I'm like, hey, happy eclipse season. What's happening? But when I. So I've had knowledge of my sign ever since I was a little kid. Like, so I was super into crystals and, like, oh, I'm a Taurus. And, like, my dad's a Libra, my mom's a Virgo, and, like, compatibility. But then as I got older, when I met Cheney Nicholas, she taught me about the chart and how, like, you're more than just your sun sign and how your big three. But it's like you're more than your big three, too. You got these, like, asteroids that go through, and you've got these, like, you've got the rock. You've got everything. You're. Your Venus matters. Your Mercury matters. Your. That really reframed how I think of myself, because it kind of opened me up to being like, oh, I'm the universe. Like, I contain multitudes. Like, if I see a Taurus trait that doesn't resonate with me, is there a Gemini trait that resonates with me? Is there a Virgo trait that resonates with me? And I think the most impactful thing I learned from her lately is that we have, like, house years. And so 2023, I was in a 12th house year, and that's the year of hidden enemies. That's the year of shadow work. And once she told me that, it, like, really unlocked for me, because I was like, oh, that makes sense. And then she was like, you're going into a first house year. So I've been in a first house year since April 2024, and now my birthday's coming up in April 2025, and I have taken advantage of this first house year because I'm a Leo rising, and my first house is all about self and how I present. So I was just like, I'm gonna go in. Like, everything is routine. Everything is, like, practice. I've just, like, am so deep into my practice and, like, loving on myself and rediscovering and redefining who I am. And now when I move into my second house year, I'm gonna take advantage of that, too.

[Jay Shetty]

What's different about the second house here that you move into?

[Lizzo]

So it's gonna be Virgo, which is my moon. And actually, it's these practices that I've been doing on an external level, how I, like, make them internal, you know, how I reframe my mem in and rework the. The nuts and bolts in my brain and, like, make it, like, my life. Like, right now, it's a routine, but I'm going to make it a lifestyle, and I'm going to get really cerebral with my Virgo moon, and I'm going to get really meticulous, and I'm going to get really in the paint, like, hardworking, because that's what that Virgo is. That Virgo allows me to, like, work my ass off, and that's where I really shine and that's where I'm really the most happy when I'm working, honestly.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, I'm a Virgo, so. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, I was like, oh, yeah.

[Lizzo]

We'Re related a little bit.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, absolute. I love that and I love how you're describing it. It sounds like you're a phenomenal astrologer. Because I feel like there's such a deep way of knowing how to use it. Right. It's not just something that I think for all of us who've been exposed to astrology since we were young, it was like, oh my God, it knows me. It's predicting, it's this, it's compatibility, but it's so much more. It's like, how are you using it for personal growth and self growth? Like, how do you use that as. Okay, this is what I'm going to focus on.

[Lizzo]

Well, first of all, I used to be like, oh, it's what I am. And that's why. But it's not like, oh, I, I am a Taurus. It's. I have Taurus, which I think gives it a little bit more purposefulness and it makes it a tool. So I'm like, how can I use my Leo Rising right now? Big hair, big personality, big identity, big bold expression, color fire. How can I use this fire right now? Because that's what I have right now. And then when I'm in Virgo, how do I use this Earth? How do I use this knowledge? How do I use this, this quest for knowledge, this hard workingness, this steadfastness? How do I use that? How do I use the private parts of myself and protect the private parts of myself? I think that is how astrology has been very helpful to me because it's not just like what I am. I don't just like settle for it. I'm not like, oh, well, that's why. Because they, they, they a Scorpio. That's why. I know it's like they have Scorpio and that's what they're choosing to do with it. I have Taurus and what I'm choosing to do with it is be ruled by Venus. I want to be all things, beauty and love, you know what I mean? With a little bit of sprinkle of hard work.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, yeah.

[Lizzo]

And you know, gluttony. Little gluttony.

[Jay Shetty]

I love that. I love the way you're talking about astrology. It's, it's so refreshing because obviously you're so deep into it and I think that's. And it sounds like that's similar to why you ate last year. You said, I'm taking a gap year, I'm gonna protect my peace. Was that part of it, to know that you're in that house year? Like, that was giving you that sense as well.

[Lizzo]

Man, once I Learned what a 12th House year is, it did kind of make sense, you know, because I'll fight against closing up and isolating. I'll fight against it because it was like a toxic trait that I had when I was younger. Like I would get. And mind you, I already told you, I've been crying a lot lately. So if I cry, it's not because I'm sad. I just am real sensitive lately and googly eyed. But when I was younger, instead of expressing myself, I would lock up and get really quiet and shut down and just like hold it all in. And I went to a point where I didn't speak for like a whole summer. And when I was younger, I didn't talk to anyone. I didn't talk out loud. The only time I used my voice was at night and I would sing to myself and that was it. So I thought that that was a really toxic trait. And I have been working on expressing myself. So when you see me online, that's a form of expression for me that I've worked to get to. When I talk to the people who I work with, that's a form of expression that I worked really hard to get. When I express myself to my friends and my family and my loved ones, I've worked hard for this. So to be quiet was like, oh my gosh, I'm reverting back to a version of myself that, that I worked away from. But I think once I learned, like, hey, girl, you don't always need to be, you don't always need to talk. Sometimes you need to sit back and just be quiet and observe what's in front of you now and be present. Stop being in the future, stop lamenting in the past what's in front of you right now. And like, when I said I was on a gap year, I was in the middle of it. And I think people were like, oh, she's about to take a whole year off. I'm like, no, I was just in the middle of it. I just hadn't, like expressed myself really. And to be honest with you, I don't feel like I've expressed myself fully in the last two years, like how I want to. I feel like I've been kind of holding my tongue and like staying to myself, but I think that it's for the best because, you know, running your mouth these days, sometimes it's just unnecessary. And sometimes it can get you into some stuff you wasn't even trying to get into, because people will misinterpret it and run with it, as I found when I was like, I'm taking a gap here. I'm protecting my peace. But, like, people were like, wait, so what's that supposed to mean? I'm like, oh, oops. I just. I just. I just wanted to let you guys know where I'm at right now. I'm in Bali and I'm having a good time, and I'm just like, quiet.

[Jay Shetty]

Oops.

[Lizzo]

Maybe I should have stayed quiet.

[Jay Shetty]

That's the funny thing, right? Even when you announce that you're going to go quiet and it's like, it's hard. It's hard to figure it out. When do you feel. It almost seems like you feel more comfortable now, like, stepping your toe back in, wanting to show more of yourself, wanting to be that way. What's making you feel like now's the right time, and what's giving you the confidence and courage to feel that way?

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[Unnamed Speaker]

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[Lizzo]

What I feel like people don't know is when you are a music artist, you are either on cycle or off cycle for an album. I think nowadays there's so much fast turnaround with music and there's like the deluxe of an album is kind of like a industry standard that I think we've forgotten, like, what it means to be on cycle and off cycle because everyone's always on. I had planned on being off cycle. That means you're not in the media, you're not doing interviews, your album cycle is done. Like, you're not gonna be played on the radio as much because people aren't working your records, you're not gonna be promoting anything because you're working on the next album. So you can be on cycle and you can be back in the media and back in the press and back on tour. And I think like the best, most simplest answer as to why I'm back now is because my album's done. Like, it really, this is my job. I am a musical artist. I make studio albums. I put them out, I promote them, I tour them, and I do it because I'm really good at music and I really want to help people with music because I know that music has saved my life, so I know it can save someone else's life. You know what I mean? And I think that's like the most simple answer. But I think it's loaded this time because at the exact same time, I was like, I'm going on a vacation. I'm going to be in Japan, I'm going to go to Kyoto and be in the woods and, like, disappear. I also had a huge scandal come out, and I think that it looked like I was shut down or silenced or hiding, when really it was like. But it's. It's just the end of my album cycle, and this was planned. So I think this album cycle, I'm gonna have to do a lot of work that I'm cool with expressing that and explaining that, because I don't think people knew or know the difference between me being like, oh, I'm off cycle, I'm in Japan, I'm in the woods, and I'm. I'm meditating, and, oh, this scandal just happened. Where's Lizzo? You know what I mean? So I. I'm aware of that. I'm cognizant of it. And I'm up for the challenge of explaining this to the people who care about me, because they deserve to know, honestly.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah. I mean, it's. First of all, I think it's always an education, learning about how a business works. And I think if you're not in the business, you don't really get it. And I think that's true for any career whatsoever, especially careers in the public eye. Right. You're like, oh, yeah, where did that person go? And it's like, well, the way you launch music is you need time to make music.

[Lizzo]

Yes.

[Jay Shetty]

And it takes so much time, and it's very visible because music's the biggest thing in the world. So you see someone for a few months, and then you don't see them again when they're working on it. So you're saying that not only were you meditating, you were traveling, you were actually working on new music.

[Lizzo]

Yes.

[Jay Shetty]

So when you said I was protecting my piece, I was taking a break for the last year. You were working on music. That's what we're hearing now, baby.

[Lizzo]

When I. The last day on my tour was in Tokyo. I spent a whole month in Tokyo and Kyoto. It was my first time in Japan. It was my dream place. I always wanted to go since I was a little girl watching anime. I took that time. I stepped foot back into America and I walked into the studio. I've been in the studio since October 2023, and I think I finished my last studio session for Love in Real Life last week when I mastered it. I've been working constantly this whole time. I didn't take no time off. I couldn't. I really honestly couldn't. I took that little time in Japan that I allowed it for myself. And I got in the kitchen and I Rolled my sleeves up. Cause I knew I was gonna have to do my biggest one, you know?

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah. And the new music's great.

[Lizzo]

Thank you.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, it's awesome. And I feel like. I mean, even when you called it Love in Real Life, I feel like how much of that was inspired by what you personally had to go through and the challenges or how much was that was just pulling from other parts of your life? Was it disconnected or was it connected?

[Lizzo]

Everything that I do, I pull from the strife and the grief that happens to me. Because the joy that I find eventually I think is the helpful part. I've never named an album before writing a song before. Like, well, Cause I love you. I wrote Cause I Love youe. I was like, okay, this. This sound like the thesis of the album. Okay, we're gonna call this album Cause I Love youe. I wrote Special. And I was like, this sounds like the heart of the album. I'm gonna name this album Special when I say I've had the name Love in Real Life since September, October 2023. And I didn't write the record Love in Real Life until maybe, like, February 2024, because I had a very specific experience and I'd love to share it. I want to talk about it as much as I can. And I never like repeating stories because I just feel like everyone's different. I'm like, let me give you something different. But this story was so life saved, like, life changing. I. I told you, like, when I was in Japan, you know, I was doing the best I can, but, you know, there was a huge scandal I was dealing with a lot. When I touched down in Los Angeles, it didn't hit me how deeply affected I was because I had been trying to be happy for everyone else. I had had. My best friend was there with her kids, and I was trying to be happy for everybody. I was like, and I'm in Japan. I should be happy. So I, like. I was like, be happy. I got in la. I had my first panic attack ever. I was in the car coming home from the airport, and I like. I was like, something's wrong with my chest. I was like, okay. And I've dealt with anxiety for years, but this felt different. And I was like, okay, something going on my chest. And I was like, okay, do. Do your anxiety protocol and anxiety protocol wasn't working. Like, breathing and the circular breath. And I was like, no, something is pressing on my chest. And I had this thought. I was just like, everybody hates me. Everybody hates me for something that isn't True. But at the end of the day, because of the position I'm in, everybody hates me, and there's nothing you can do about it. And I was like, okay. I got into the house, I could barely walk, and I collapsed by my bed and was like, oh, shit. I couldn't breathe. And I was like. And I was by the bed and I couldn't breathe, and something was pressing on my chest, and. And from then on, I had been in a state of depression because I didn't know how to fix it. I was so. And I'm not trying to make nobody feel bad for me, but, man, whew. Baby. I was dark, and I was scared of people. I was like. I was like, you can't trust anyone. You can't love anyone. I don't want to talk to nobody, you know, because there was, like, a lot going on where, like, people were getting weird phone calls from people, and it was, like, weird, like, stuff going on that I had never experienced before, because I was like, this. This is wild. This is a whole nother level of what I've. My job that I've never experienced. And so I was scared, and I was like, I'm gonna go to this concert. Because I really wanted to go to the concert. And I was, like, terrified to go. I was like, I know I'm gonna walk out and somebody's gonna look at me and be like. And, you know, I was just like. And there's nothing you can do about it, but I went anyway. And, man, when I say it was the opposite, I walked out, and I just seen so many people look at me, and they were like, lizzo. They were like, oh, my God. They were like, come here. I love you. I love you. And it was just people in a crowd, and I was hugging them, and they was hugging me. And I'm telling you, like, people were. They were like, yes, yes. They were just like. It felt like me cheering me on, being like, you did it. You know, you got over your fear. You got outside. You can trust people again. You can love people. People do love you. You're okay. And you know what? There's something you can do about it. And you did it. You stepped outside. And I was like, this is the only thing that's real. You can't get this kind of love on the Internet. You can't. You absolutely can't. And I thought I could for years. Years. Because I built my platform on the validation of sharing myself and being myself with the Internet and being embraced and being shown love. And I Was like, this is love. No, love is in real life. And I felt it from not. I won't even say they're fans of my music, just people. Oh, it was the most life saving thing. And I was like, I have to name my album Love in Real Life because I know I'm not the only person. I know I'm not the only person who sits on their phone and creates a version of themself or is told by the world who they are and starts to believe it, even if it's not really who you are. You're like, maybe I am not good enough. Maybe I. Maybe I'm not pretty. Maybe I'm not cool. Maybe. And it's like, no, this is a lie. This may be a reflection of some things and some real things do happen on here. And I love the Internet. I'm a child of the Internet. Like, I get down with social media, but I also know that if you're. If your only sense of self, your only form of validation is coming from social media or coming from your phone or coming from a text back or coming from a dating app, it's not going to fill you up. Like being in the real world and building community with people and getting over your fear of it, because it is scary.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Lizzo]

And so I've held that title and I was like, I wrote like 4 love in real lives until I finally settled on the, the party stadium version. I said, why is this one so lit? Like I wrote these deep emotional ones. And then I wrote this one and was like, well, that's Lizzo. And I think that was when I just, when I just realized, oh, this is who I am. I go through this really, really tough shit, man. And it's fine because I have learned to use my alchemy and turn it into gold and turn it into meaningfulness and like acts of rebellious joy that people can use in the world. And I'm cool with it. That's my mission.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, I love that. I love that. One of the things that I think you talked about there, which is so powerful, is you go through something really difficult on the other side of it. There's this love in real life.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

But in between there's the depression, the darkness, the. The isolation, the worry, the fear. And we all go through that. We all experience at some point in our life where we're almost feeling like we have to hide. We feel like you said, I don't know who to trust, who to love. Will people accept me? How did you go through that? Like, what was that? Timeline. Like, what did it look like when you woke up? What did you do that helped? Who supported you? How did it look, man, because that's hard.

[Lizzo]

I inadvertently set a lot of boundaries at that time, and it was more like defenses because I was so afraid of people that even the people that I was close to, I just. I set up these boundaries and I. And I disappeared into myself. I'm not even gonna sit up here and. And lie and be like, I handled it perfectly. I didn't. I didn't. It was very messy, and I was hurt by people that I loved, and I hurt people that I loved at the time. This is. And I'm talking about the depression period. I'm not talking about me as a boss. I'm not talking about work. No, I'm talking about October 2023 to now. And I fought really, really hard for myself. And sometimes when you fight, it get real messy. I was scrapping. I was fighting for my life. There was times when it was like, you want to die? Okay, well, just die. Like, nobody will care. And I was like, oh, I'm talking to myself like that. When the. Did this happen? I'm like, love yourself. I'm like, stay positive. I'm like, no, you have to live. You have to live for your mommy. You have to live for the. And it was like, no, bitch, you want to die, Die. Like, this is the time to do it, because, nope, everyone will hate you and nobody cares. And I think that defensiveness isolated me really bad. But there's something about isolation that turns into solitude, that turns into introspection, that turns into, I am sitting alone with myself and I can finally see her. I was covered up by so much that I couldn't see myself. I was blinded by all these people in my space telling me who I am. I was blinded by my career. Standing on stage and 20,000 people saying, I love you. You're amazing. I'm like, okay, thank you. I gotta push through. And I was never alone. I was never alone. Even when I was at home. I'd be like, you wanna come over? Let me. Let me throw up. Let me throw something. Let me throw a pool party. Let me have people come over and drink wine. Like, maybe it was a fear of being alone with myself, maybe it was a lack of self awareness. But in that isolation, where I think my defensiveness had pushed off and pushed away the people I love the most, I. I pushed them all away. I got to sit with this person and I saw the things that other people saw sometimes that aren't the coolest or the nicest or that I'm the most proud of. I'm like, you are. You're moody. You're uncomfortable. You forgot who you are. You forgot why you're here. And I think that during that time, I embraced that part of myself. It's like, okay, you're moody. Be in a mood. But what do you need to do to make yourself feel better in that mood? And what can you do to protect yourself in that mood and protect others? Sit by yourself, bitch. Read a book. Learn how to finally, consistently meditate, exercise, get some fresh air, get in the sun. And it was like I forced myself to do that shit. That shit is not easy. I didn't want to exercise at first. Hell, no. But I got one. Got that cardio machine. And I was like, I never regret moving my body. I never regret it. I started. It's an anxiety technique. It's like you focus on your senses. Like, what can I smell? What can I taste? What can I see? What can I feel? And I started doing that. Not intentionally. I'm not a genius when it comes to this shit. I just started doing it. I was like, what are you eating? What are you putting in your body? You're putting things in your body that's making you sick. You know, what are you doing on a daily basis? You're. You're. You're bedrotting. And that's fine sometimes, but also when you're always doing it, your body doesn't move, you know, what are you looking at? What are you watching on tv? I had to throw my phone away. I'm about to throw my phone away. I'm like, oh, God, it writes itself. I threw my phone away. I did not look at it. I told my team, I said, anything I need to post or anything I want to post, you post it for me. I don't want to look at that shit no more. And that was hard, too, because I love the Internet, but it's doing a lot of things that are hard to finally be like, this is who I am. And I need to become. I need to love her, and I need to make her the best version of myself. Because guess what? Even after all this shit, even after looking at this aspect of myself that I was like, wow, that's not my favorite part of myself, you know, after all the things I've been through, all the relationships that have come and gone in my life, I still deserve it. I really do. And it's all I have, and it's all I got. Sorry. For cussing. It's all I got.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Lizzo]

Because, what, are you gonna sit up and you're gonna beat yourself up for the rest of your life about anything that could have happened or any misunderstanding or any. You know what I'm saying? Well, you're gonna have a miserable life. Do you want a miserable life? I sat and had to ask myself that. I'm like, do you wanna be miserable? Do you wanna feel bad? Or do you wanna get back to doing what you do? I was like, damn it. I gotta do what I do. I got to.

[Jay Shetty]

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[Lizzo]

Yes.

[Jay Shetty]

And now that noise isn't what I want to hear. And now I actually have to find my voice. Now I actually have to, like, discover it again. I have to, like, figure out what it's even saying and what it sounds like. Right. That's. That's what you had to go through that process. That's hard because it's such. It can feel so lonely, and it can feel so isolating, as you said.

[Lizzo]

Yep.

[Jay Shetty]

As you're dealing with that and you're kind of tipping your toe back into doing what you love, and you go out and you have that moment that you said, like, love in real life. And I love. I love the way you explained that. I'm glad you told that story.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

When I hear you, I feel the same way. It's like, when you go out in the real world, people aren't shouting that stuff that they shout on the Internet. No one's commenting. The thing that you heard in the comment section, you're not hearing that when you're out and about. You're seeing real people have real reactions, and there's this look in their eyes that we all feel. And the energy. How did it feel after that day? Was it from that day? You were like, all right, now I feel more confident, or do you still go back and forth sometimes?

[Lizzo]

Hell, no. I'm not even there now. Like, even you being like, oh, my gosh, my wife is such a huge fan, and we've wanted you on the show for a while. I was like, really? Like, I don't.

[Jay Shetty]

It's true.

[Lizzo]

I don't believe it fully, and I don't feel it fully, and I don't know what that is. Maybe it's from, like, you know, I was like, a kind of a nerdy kid in high school, and I was. Or especially middle school, and I was, like, you know, teased in middle school real bad. And, like, maybe it's that, like, I'm not cool mentality that, like, never goes away because those are so such formative years. So please be nice to people in high school, because it really shapes your whole life. It made me cool. It made me a diamond. But I still struggle with believing love and believing I am worthy of love and believing that I am loved. I think that those are motifs that are definitely still difficult for me, and I can throw little tantrums about, but that's on me. I need to sit back, like, honestly, putting it all out here. I'll be on the Internet sometimes talking noise. And it's my insecurities, and I own that. I wanna be more careful with that because of the position that I'm in now. You know, the responsibility I have now in the state of the Internet now. I can't just be projecting my insecurities on the Internet. I think there is a more responsible way to do it to where people understand me more and that people know where I'm coming from. And I can make it more of a personal thing instead of these blanket statements and. Because it sounds like it's coming from a place of anger, but it's really not. But it's just coming from these insecure moments that I have sometimes where I feel like. Man, I feel, like, misunderstood. And I feel like people don't get me, and I feel like people don't see me. And I'm like, how do I express myself in a way where you get me and you feel me and you see me and, like, I want you to know. And I'm working on it.

[Jay Shetty]

So before you would say it, and now you're reflecting.

[Lizzo]

Yes, before I would say it. And when I say before, I mean, like, a couple weeks ago. I'm still. Man. I'm human, man. I am. I'm really. It's hard in this thing. Human flesh and blood. It's so wild. But, like, I think that I'm also human enough to admit where I could be better. And those are the places where I could be better. I was in that giant sound bowl banging that thing because it kept me from going on Twitch. It kept me from going on Blue sky or going on. You know what I'm saying, TikTok? And just because that's not the place for it anymore. I think there's enough going on in the world. There's enough to be outraged about. There's enough pain circulating on the Internet. I don't need to share my pain. I need to share my joy. I need to share my love. I'm a very blessed person. I get to make music for a living. I have people who love me. I have people who've never met me, who love me because of the music that I make. And I get to travel all over the world and connect with those people and touch those people. I can support my family financially. As a fat black woman who was born in Detroit and raised in Houston, Texas, the odds were stacked against me, and I beat the odds. And I'm here, and I'm surviving and thriving in this World, I am grateful. And I think that my position is to always show that gratitude. I want to live in a constant state of gratitude, and I want to. And I want to emit that, you know, And I want to just really show the world love at all times. They don't need. They don't need no more darkness. There's enough darkness in the world. It don't need to come from somebody like me. If I get insecure sometimes, call your mama. Call your mama. You know what I'm saying? Like, girl. So that's where I'm growing as a person, and I'm proud of the person I'm becoming.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, well, Liz, I was gonna say I think it's your music, but it's also. Cause you mean something to people, you know, like you've done. Like, when I think about my wife and what I was sharing with you earlier, it's. Cause you mean something to her. When I was talking about Helena, my producer, it's. Cause you mean something to her. Like, I think you mean something to people. It's beyond just. They love your music for sure, but you mean something to people. And I think that that's why, like you said, when we were at school, it was all about whether you were cool and whether you were trendy and whether you were, you know, the it girl or guy or whatever it was. But it's almost like it's even beyond that. When you mean something, it's beyond being cool and relevant.

[Lizzo]

I think that's where, like, a lot of my points of depression were coming from. Because I had been so fearlessly myself for years. The person that you saw was the person that you got. That was really me, and that is really me. The issues that I spoke about, I really care about. The issues I stood up for. I really want to see change in. It really matters to me. The platforms that I give people, that's real. All of that is real. And I think what I learned about fame is even if that's really me, it just becomes kind of like a fictional story, that it's a character, it's a brand, it's a thing that now doesn't belong to you anymore. And when it got changed, that was what really up my sense of self. Because I was like, well, now the person that, you know, the world is saying I am, that's not even me. And that's shadow work. I was like, that's like some shadow self that was created out of me not being precautious and careful and protecting myself. But I think that it really depresses me to feel like it's not me anymore. Whoever Lizzo is to the world is not really even me. And that disconnect is depressing. And I think the only remedy to that is continuing to be myself. That's the only. This time I just have to continue to be me and people will see me for who I am. But I think for a long time, I was really depressed about, like, oh, damn. Like, now there's this, like, fake character. Now there's, like, this, like. And, you know, I can't blame or judge people for believing it, for believing that's who I am. I can't, because I would be in the same position, you know, So I take the fact that I mean something to people very seriously. I take it to heart. And it's why I have moved the way that I have moved my entire career. And it's why I. When I. When. When things happened, I would speak on it. I would take accountability. It's why I did those things, because I know that. And I think when it was out of my control and someone else could tell a story about me that wasn't true and people believed it, it crushed me because I know that I mean something to people. And it's why I'm careful. To this day, I'm never gonna stop being care. If anything, I'm more careful now. I can't just let any author into my life who can make me a villain. I can't do that anymore because I am the author and I'm taking back my narrative by continuing to tell my story from me. And thank you for giving me the opportunity to do that.

[Jay Shetty]

No, of course. I think everyone deserves that. You know, everyone needs that. And I think it's also hard when the things that you stand for are the same things that you're being scrutinized for. Right. It's like, that's. That's what's so hard about it. It's like when you stand for inclusivity and empowerment, being questioned for those same things is. Is, like, so painful, and it kind of like dismantles your whole identity, even for yourself.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

So I can imagine that's really hard. And that's why I think everyone needs an opportunity and a platform to be able to do that.

[Lizzo]

But it feels like, strangely, like. Like it's this thing now where it's like, okay, if I stand up for inclusivity, it's invalidated. If I stand up for black women, it's invalidated. If I stand up for body Positivity and fatness and. And stand up against fatphobia. It's invalidated because of that. And I was like, wow, that's convenient. Like, these are things I truly believe in. I'm not about to just pick up some new causes because it's the thing to do. I was a political and very vocal activist artist before it was the trend, before teams were telling artists to speak up. Like, I was just doing it because I wanted to. It's an uncomfortable position to be in right now because I also know I have a responsibility to, like I said, only bring love. And I think me speaking on certain things, or even if I feel like I'm advocating for something, it's kind of creating more hate and chaos than what I intended. So it's just like, sometimes you just gotta shut the up.

[Jay Shetty]

And that's hard too, because you really care about it, right? I think that's the challenge. It's like, you keep doing something because you really care about it. That's why you started in the first place. But then sometimes you're like, well, maybe it'd be smarter for me to not comment on it because it's safer.

[Lizzo]

And not just safer for me, but safer for the public. I don't want to create divisiveness. I really don't. There's enough discourse. There's enough division. And I think that, like, me doing something that I thought was, like, you know, for a good cause, or like, from the goodness of my heart, if it's taken and creates negative discourse where people are going back and forth, I won't say nothing. I won't say nothing at all. Don't. Don't worry about me. You don't got to worry about me at all. Don't you worry, honey.

[Jay Shetty]

And before you would have. That wouldn't have been your reaction right before?

[Lizzo]

No, because I feel like there was no opposition. I feel like when I spoke up, the only opposition was the opposition to the cause. I think now when I speak up for something, there's opposition to me. It's like, ugh, bad messenger. Good right message. Bad messenger. And I'm like, oh, you know what? Valid, absolutely valid as a famous person or a celebrity right now. This is what I signed up for. And I. And I'm like, so I'm not. I'm not complaining. I can't complain. I'm do it like, I'm. I'ma just be quiet because I understand that it's creating more confusion than solution. And I only want. I'm a solutionary. I'm a solutionary. I like to bring solutions. I like to only speak up if I know it's going to help in some way. And if it ain't helping, zip it. Zip it.

[Jay Shetty]

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Health and wellness brand dedicated to harnessing the power of plant medicine. Apothecary is inspired by founder and CEO Shizuokusa Japanese Heritage and the mission is to bridge east and west by harnessing the intelligence of nature. Their tinctures are so easy to add into your daily routine, take directly into your mouth, or mix into a delicious functional mocktail. I tried Blueburn for a metabolism boost and I absolutely love it. With Oregon Grapefruit and Adaptogens. It supports stress, cravings and recovery. It is so simple and so effective. Apothecary is sold in Sprouts farmers market stores nationwide and online@ Ulta.com Amazon and apothecary.com that's apothecary with a [e-mail] we're.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Leaving today and entering a world of Cinderella, Castle, sightseeing, Tron light cycling, jungle cruise, punning, Pirate, swashbuckling, Everest climbing, Dapper Danning, Dunning, Soaring, soaring, fireworks, show of I'm not crying, you're crying. World of favorites for whatever you love, infinite worlds await at the most magical place on earth. Walt Disney World Resort.

[Jay Shetty]

I like that. Solutionary.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

Solutions, not confusion. That is definitely. I like that. And that's a great way for all of us to think about stuff.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

In our own personal life, whether it's public or not. It's like Is me speaking creating more confusion or is it actually getting us more clarity? Is it actually pushing us in the right direction? Have you felt you were saying, like, obviously when you go through something like this, you've got to become more careful about. You were saying you don't want someone else to become an author of your journey. It's like picking the people that are close to you becomes harder and harder and harder. Has that been, like, a real focus for you in surrounding yourself with the right frequency and vibration? And how do you do that?

[Lizzo]

I don't have any new people in my life anymore, and I'm very careful about. And honestly, a lot of. Of relationships that I had are gone. Like, and. And it's not, like, bad. It's just like, I just. I stopped chasing because I. How do I say this? How do I say this? I see the good in everyone, and I have seen the good in some really kind of like. Like, broken people who have been. Have done harmful things. But I always see the potential. I always see the good. And it's like. It's like that inner child in me that's like, oh, my gosh, I can help them. Like, but they are good. And I think that when they would do harmful things to me, I had a sense of forgiveness and understanding. And I would be like, I know that's not you. And so I would chase and pursue that relationship. And I'm not talking about romance. I'm talking about people I worked with, talking about friends who were also people I worked with. I was like, I was hiring my best friends, you know, and I would kind of see past it. And meanwhile, I was allowing something potentially nefarious or not good for me into my space, right? So I realized, and I think people all over the world, if. When you put up a boundary that protects yourself and you stop chasing the people who continually hurt you, you'll find that pretty soon they'll be gone, and you'll be like, wait a minute. I was keeping this afloat the whole time it was me. And so when I isolated, a lot of people just sailed away. And I opened my eyes and was like, like, who's left? And the people that are left are, you know, my best friend who I've known since, like, fourth grade. Do you know what I'm saying? And I love her and I cherish her. My boyfriend, you know? And I'm just like, wow, this is cool. I don't need to pursue anything or anyone anymore. I'm full. And I think that comes from that isolation. And I Think it comes from appreciating the people that you have and from like a business perspective, when you're friends with somebody and you hire them, it's just like, it gets the, the power dynamic up, the relationship up, the social structure of the relationship. And it's something that, you know, I wanted to do when I was younger. I was like, yeah, puts money in my friends pockets, like, let's go, let's turn up, let's see the world, let's. And it was, you know, something I, I loved. But then I also realized it's not fair to them to be their boss and their friend and that will help keep things just clean. Yeah, I just want, and like I said, simple solutions. I don't want no more confusion ever again. I want my friends to be my friends and I want my employees to be my employees.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah. This is so real. And I appreciate how like, real you're being about it and how direct it is because I do think that it's a, it's glorified to be like, we should be like a family and everything should be really close. And I think that's like idealized. It's glorified. Like that's what people talk about. And I think recently a lot of people have been talking about how teams should not actually operate as families. They should operate as teams. Like teams, like a sports team.

[Lizzo]

Yes.

[Jay Shetty]

There's a coach, there's players. The way they operate is like, there's camaraderie, there's collaboration, but there's an energy of like, no, we're playing here to win. That's the goal of a team, is to win. The goal of a family is not to win. The goal of a family is to just be safe and wait a minute. But we're at work to win and do stuff. We have results and targets. Families don't have targets. Families don't have results. Families don't have goals. The goal of a family is just to stay together and you can see how it plays on our minds. And I've had that too. Like, I, I used to think that team should be family too. And there's a family energy. And I'm like, that's great. But it's like there's just a different value system to a team and a family. And, and I think there's so much to be said for this that you only learn by going through it. Yeah, you don't know this when you start. Like, I think about how much I've had to learn moving into this space for myself. Doing this for the last 10 years, it's like I didn't know. I've never built a team before. And just because I'm good at one thing doesn't mean I know everything about everything. And I think there's a lot of pressure on artists, creators, musicians to know about everything. When your talent is kind of like here, right?

[Lizzo]

Yes.

[Jay Shetty]

It's like your talent is music and creation, artistry and storytelling and so you make everything.

[Lizzo]

Music and creation and artistry. And you're like, oh, this should be a creative space and this should be lax. And everyone's like, no, man, this is a well oiled machine. If Lizzo is the brand, that's the company. You know what I mean? It's like everybody has their, there's their role and it's just like, know your role and stay in your lane. That's something that I've learned. It's. I don't know, it's. I'm not out of it, man. I'm, I'm still learning what's coming next. But I'm so grateful to God because this experience and I'm, and I'm not just talking about like the scandal. I'm talking about the last like two years of my life, the last like all of this and has prepared me for, I think something so incredible that I needed to be ready for that I needed to be this way for. You know what I mean? Because I was holding on to a lot of toxicity. I really was. Because that's just the kind of like. And I'm not even talking about toxicity within myself. I mean like toxic systems and structures and people. I held on to them because I was just like, I'm a Taurus, you know, I'm very loyal. I'm just like to the wheels fall off and it's like, man, let go and flow. And I think that I had to learn that like God had tried to show me to so many ways. It was like, knock me over the head. I was like, yeah, but that person was just mean. Knock me over the head. Yeah, but that was just a misunderstanding. Knocked me over the head. It was like, yeah, wake up, wake up, let go. You know when you can't let go, you hold onto things that weigh you down. And I'm not even trying to talk bad about nobody because I feel like people needed to let me go too. Honestly. There are some relationships and dynamics that I know that like I was keeping them back from greatness. Do you know what I mean? Or not even let's. Greatness keeping Them back from just like living, you know what I mean? Living for themselves. And it's not my job to think about that, that. But I will say it's not just a. It's not a one way street. I'm not sitting up here being the victim and being like, I had to do this for me. It's like, no, man, it's mutual. There's somebody out there whose story is like, yeah, I have. If I had to let go and now I'm flowing and things are coming to me that are meant for me, you know, I'm not just holding on to this situation that's starting to whoop my ass, you know, I'm aware of that.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah. So it sounds like this was the headspace from which the music was created.

[Lizzo]

Absolutely.

[Jay Shetty]

All of this.

[Lizzo]

Yeah. I was so angry. I was like so, like, I was so angry from like October to January of. I just have a lot of angry songs. And I was like, get it out. Talk yo.

[Radhi Devlukia]

Shit.

[Lizzo]

I had some songs that were very like, that are very dark, you know, and they're. And I left them on the album because I was like, I just think that people deserve to know. And like, it's songs about loss. Like, I lost my dog puka, you know, 20 years, you know, she was like a grandma to me, you know, and that was really hard. I wrote a song for her and I have like songs about like, just friendships that ended that really hurt me. And I was like, leave it. You know, I had this one song I wrote and like I hadn't slept in like 48 hours. And it was like during one of the worst like mental breakdowns I've ever had in my life. Like, I had the studio scheduled the next day and I hadn't slept and I was like, like tear stained face and like musty clothes. I was like, I'm gonna go to the studio, I'm gonna go. And I went and I wrote this incredible song and I'm like, leave it, leave it. You know, you. You owe yourself that. You don't always have to write perfect, polished pop hits. You can have songs about your real experience that you didn't go in and edit on this album. But then I wrote Love in Real Life in like February, and I was like, huh? I was like, this feels good. This feels familiar. And I started to realize my purpose. My purpose, like I said, is to turn this pain into champagne and help other people through it. I can't just sit and be sad for 12, 15 songs. I gotta give people something to step to Something to march to, something to perk themselves back up. I didn't do it because I forced myself to. I did it because that was just the place I was at now. I had written so many sad songs, so many mad songs, so many wrong songs that, like, I could finally focus on what's right and what feeds my soul.

[Jay Shetty]

And so some of those songs made it onto the album. Some of them didn't. Some of them were just.

[Lizzo]

A lot of them didn't. A lot of them. I'm like, ooh, ooh. Like, you'll never hear this one. Never hear the light of day.

[Jay Shetty]

But you still had to make it. To let go of that emotion, that feeling. There was a part of it that allowed you to shed certain things you were carrying.

[Lizzo]

And that's one thing I will tell any artist. It's like, make the song. It's not like, once you record it, it's gonna go on the radio tomorrow. It's not gonna be on DSPs at midnight. Write the song, say the lyrics, say the weird thing. People desperately wanna hear the weird thing. And then write another song. And if you. You know what I'm saying? Like, that's part of the. How do I describe this? I always say, like, there's some sort of stream of creation going always. And ideas, like, are coming out. Like, fish is so wild. And so you're always kind of like, when you sit down and cast your net to create, whether it's painting, whether it's writing, whether it's music, whatever dance, you cast that line, and whatever that fish is, you catch that fish, you pull it out and that's it. You gotta pull the fish out. You can't be like, well, I caught the fish, but I can't say that. Or, I caught the fish, but I don't like this genre of music. I can't make a classical twerk song. Yes, you can make the classical twerk song. Pull the fish out and go fishing again. Cast your line again. You know what I'm saying? What do they say it's full of plenty of fish in the sea.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah. Yeah. I love what you said about how creativity is a stream. And that's why the word stream is actually so beautiful. Because you're right that we're all pulling from the universe of moments of creativity and mixed with our experience. It's almost like one layer is the stream of creativity in the universe, and the other is the experience of real life, of what we're going through. And great art is made when those two things are Moving in parallel, and you're able to, like, connect the dots between the two. And it seems like that's where what you've been trying to stream and channel and put it together. What. How has your view on love changed through this process? Like, when you look at the word love now.

[Lizzo]

I'm such a better lover now. I worked really hard, and I can't remember, it was like 2017. I was really deep in it, and I had, like, candles and I was reading books, and I was trying to understand what it means to be an unconditional lover. Because love with conditions hurt really bad, really bad. And I was like, please, I want to learn how to be an unconditional lover. And once I had all the crystals and all the candles and all the prayer and all the reading, I. And I was like, I get it. I get unconditional love. I realized that, like, actually as a human being, I'm incapable of unconditional love. We are, I think, think on a spirit level, vibrationally, we are unconditional love. And I think that is why it's hard to try to be an unconditional lover. Because it's not something that you can actively do. You just are. But when you tap back into your flesh, that's when the conditions come right back in. And I found that when I choose to love and flow, that is the most unconditional part. When I love on a material level, that's when the conditions start to come in and it gets painful and it gets petty and it gets weird. But every time I forget, because we're going to forget, we are human beings, we step back into the flesh every morning when we wake up. I have to go back to the flow. And I remind myself, I'm like, well, how would you feel if they did that to you? You know, how would you. What would you think? And I go, oh. And I empathize and I understand. And it's so much easier for me now to accept because I think love is acceptance. You know what I mean? Like, I like my. One of my favorite phrases to tell myself and others is like, I love and accept you for who you are. I love and accept you for who you are. And sometimes when people piss me off, I go, I love and accept them for who they are. I love it. I have to remind myself that I do on a. On a very soul level, on a vibrational level. I love accepting them and accept them for who they are. Once I get into the material of it. Ah, you up my day, or why would you say that? To me or why? Why would you do this to me? It starts to get real conditional and painful and pain body and hateful and drama and mess. I don't want no drama and I don't want no mess. I really don't anymore. And honestly, I was addicted to it for a long time. Oh my God. I love reality tv. I loved hearing gossip about other. I would be like, oh my God. So what's the t. What happened? What happened? Oh my God. Like, like I was very spunky, you know what I mean? And I realized, oh, that's like, you know, I see something online, I'm like, I go down the rabbit hole. I'm like, but what happened? I want to know that drama. And it's like, girl, that is lowering your vibration. And like, I hate to even say lowering vibration because people going to think it's woo woo. It's like I'm literally lowering my waking state by doing that. You're lowering yourself and then you start to attract drama. Oh my God. When you inject, when you, you are what you eat, when you eat drama, you attract mother drama.

[Jay Shetty]

So well said.

[Lizzo]

I was so addicted to it and I think like, now I'm a better lover. And what I understand about love is. Love is like, there's no drama. It's like calm water. It's like peaceful water. Because love is a flow state.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Lizzo]

You're at your best. You love it your best when you're just flowing. Don't try to understand it, don't try to make it make sense and don't try to like find problems with it. Just like love them, you know, and be loved.

[Radhi Devlukia]

Apothecary is a leading Japanese health and wellness brand dedicated to harnessing the power of plant medicine. Apothecary is inspired by founder and CEO Shizuokusa's Japanese heritage and the mission is to bridge east and west by harnessing the intelligence of nature. Their tinctures are so easy to add into your daily routine, take directly into your mouth, or mix into a delicious functional mocktail. I tried Blueburn for a metabolism boost and I absolutely love it. With Oregon grapefruit and Adaptogens, it supports stress cravings and recovery. It is so simple and so effective. Apothecary is sold in sprouts farmers market stores nationwide and online@ Ulta.com Amazon and apothecary.com that's apothecary with a [e-mail] we're.

[Unnamed Speaker]

Leaving today and entering a world of Cinderella, Castle sightseeing, Tron Light Cycling. Jungle cruise. Punning Pirate. Swashbuckling. Everest. Climbing. Dapper Denning. Soaring. Soaring. Fireworks. Show up. I'm not crying. You're crying. World of favorites. For whatever you love, infinite worlds await at the most magical place on earth. Walt Disney World Resort.

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[Jay Shetty]

Is.

[Unnamed Speaker]

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[Jay Shetty]

Yeah. I love that Flesh to flow. That's really good because it's, it's, it's so good. I, I love what you're saying because I, I think about this often where we're like, like, we're all like, be kinder to everyone. And then the next thing you need is someone's comment section, which is like, why does her voice sound like that? What's up with her hair today? Like, what's up with his? You know? And I'm like, wait a minute. Didn't we all just say we needed to be kinder to us, each other and kinder to ourselves? And we'll be like, oh, no. Mental health is the most important thing in society right now. You look at a comment section, all of a sudden someone's mental health is being absolutely destroyed for things they can't even control, things that you don't even know why their voice sounds like that or why their weight's like that or why their health's like that. Like, you just have no context. And it's so fascinating to me that you see this complete quarrel and hypocrisy of constant, like, just everything we're saying. We're finding it hard to live. Like, it's hard to see in real life, like, like what you just said like, we all love reading about, gossip about someone else's life, someone else's dating scenario. But then if your friends are gossiping about your life, you're like, can you believe it? They're spreading rumors about me. And it's so interesting, right? It's like, it's, it's. And I think about it all the time. Because as soon as you think you're free of it, if you're like, oh, no, I never gossip about anyone or whatever, you just got to take a beat and take a look at how you spoke about someone yesterday. And so we're cons, like you said, we're all human. We're constantly trying to propagate and preach the right thing to do, but we're all struggling in reality with actually doing it when it's hard.

[Lizzo]

Effy, we are as kind to others as we are to ourselves. I'm learning that. I'm learning the people who say the meanest things to me and about me are going through it. They struggling too. How you gonna be. How you gonna be nice to me and say something nice about me? When you talk down about yourself and, And I don't even mean, like, people who have low self esteem. I'm talking like, ah, stupid. Why did I do that? I'm so stupid. Or like, oh, I look bad. Like, I don't like how I look. Like, oh, I hate myself. Like, it's little things like that that you say over and over and over and over. And your body's like, bet you know, and that's why I'm so man. I'm telling you, self love can save the world because you. It's. Because it starts with you. Self love could. Could make this world a better loving place. Because when you're. You notice the people who are kind to themselves and, and love themselves, they're. They just. You're like, oh, I like being around. You're so kind. You're so nice. Like you said, why are you so nice to me? It's like, was that because I'm nice to me?

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Lizzo]

You know what I mean?

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, that's real.

[Lizzo]

But when I'm hard on myself and when I'm striving for perfection and when I'm beating myself up and when I'm doing the most, I can't control how I treat other people or how I look at other people or what I think about other people when I wasn't. When I'm in the trenches, the trenches, I'm. I'm. The trenches are surrounding me now. That I'm kinder to myself. And that doesn't even mean like, oh, I put on lotion every day and self care. I mean, like, man, like the way I look at the world, the way I view the world, the way I view myself through the lens of the world is kinder. You know what I'm saying? And I think if everyone, if everyone was a little kinder to themselves, I think we'd have less and less of the negativity in the world.

[Jay Shetty]

I agree. I, I, I think that's a beautiful way to put it. It's that projection of our own insecurity and pain and the conversation that's happening in our mind is, is going outward as well. And I feel like it's harder like we were talking about earlier when you mean something to people, because I feel like when you then change, people feel like they're losing a friend. Right? It's like when you transform, then people feel like, oh, but you used to be the girl that watched the reality TV and talked about it. Now you don't like, I'm losing you. Oh, you used to be the person who, who didn't do that and didn't do that. And now you are like, I feel like I'm losing you. Have you ever felt that way before? Like, as you're transforming, as you're growing, as you're becoming the person you want to be, that people can often also feel like you're leaving them behind. People feel like they're grieving a friend.

[Lizzo]

Yes, Yes. I would say we could talk about my personal life because on a personal level, I do feel like there's just people who like, our relationship just grew apart because we just don't even relate on the same things anymore. You know, I know a lot of people be like, oh, I grew out of that. It's like, it's not really you grew out of it, you just grew apart from it. And that's fine. But I would say on like a, my public relationship, I'm, I'm very careful about what's happening with me right now. Like, I have been on an intentional weight release journey and I put it on the Internet. I posted about it like maybe a year and a half ago. And I was like, very clear that this time it's intentional. I've always been very like, work athletic online. I work out. You know, I'm always like, you know, eating and showing how I eat and like always trying to like, eat healthy. And I remember once I started becoming famous, like 2018, 2019, I was and I was like, a big girl. And I was like, it's gonna be on me to show the world that big girls can also be healthy. Big girls can also have stamina. Big girls can also be loved. Big girls can also be sexy, et cetera, et cetera. All the things that I, you know, stood for. And I told people that I was going on an intentional weight release journey because I wanted to be transparent in that way. Because I do feel like I have a relationship with the public where it's like, I am their friend and it is relatable. You know what I mean? It is relatable to struggle with your body. So I put it out there. And I think over the last few. Over the last, like, year and a half, as I've been doing it, my body has been changing very slowly, but I don't think people were paying attention. I would show different things, like, oh, I showed my workouts, or I'd show, like, what I eat in a day. Or I would say, I started off the year by being like, hey, new year, new me. Trends don't have to be toxic. Please be careful when you're posting about your January fitness goals, because it can be very fat phobic. Like, I was still very, like, anti fatphobia on this entire journey. But I think that, you know, we gotta remember everybody not seeing your all the time. Everybody not seeing every video you post. Everybody's not privy to what you're going through. They're not with you every day. So when I pop out on a red carpet, it. Or when a video suddenly goes viral and my body's different, it appears like it was overnight. It appears sudden. And I think that was shocking to a lot of people because now the headline is Lizzo Skinny. Which is a far cry from the truth, because I'm not. I'm not. And even in my original video, I was like, when I reach my weight release goal, I'm not going to be considered thin by any means, by any metric, by any bmi. I will still get trolled and talked about and the fat jokes will still be there, but I'll be happy. And I said that because I meant it. And here I am. And I was like, how did y'all. How are y'all? How? Wisdom is the disconnect. But I think the disconnect is communication. Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah, that's such a good point.

[Lizzo]

I've been so transparent. So if anyone wanted to look at my paper trail, it's there. But I also know that. That they're not going to. And My responsibility as someone who has this relationship with the public and they have it with me, is to continue. I'm not going to stop and get defensive and be like, God, I did for a second, I was like, I'm not skinny. Why are y'all saying that? You know, and that kind of. It baffled me because it's just like, if y'all knew. Knew how much I weighed, if y'all knew what my body really looked like. And I was like, oh, just show them what your body looks like. Just be real about it. Just be real about the body dysmorphia that. That you're experiencing. That, you know, now that you have released some weight, that's kind of new to you. Like, you know, that is also, like, it's strangely inverse. Like, show them. Just show them your journey more. Just continue to do it. Instead of being angry and defensive about it, be real about it, because that's what your friend loves about you, and that's what you love about your friend, that you can be real. Yeah, you know, I'm still in it because this is all very new. Like, I think it's now just starting to be, like, a point of conversation and discourse, and I think my responsibility with that is to make sure that it's still me.

[Jay Shetty]

That's beautiful. That's beautiful. The way you explained that. I love. First of all, I really appreciate the empathy that you have in the fact that everyone's not seeing everything. So it feels like overnight, it feels like a shock. And the fact that you even have the foresight to even think through that shows just how aware you are. But at the same time, I really appreciate how you're using the word weight release and not loss.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

And talk to us about that, because I think that's really important. It's such a interesting reframe and such an important reframe because the weight that.

[Lizzo]

Is no longer on me is not just fat or physical. I released so much to get to this point, and I think people can see that. And I don't want to describe anything as loss. You know, I don't want to. I'm not. I'm not experiencing any loss. I've actually gained so much. I've gained, like, a sense of self. I gained, like, a lifestyle that I actually really love. And I'm like, I can maintain this. You know, I've gained new perspectives on, like, nutrition and. And. And the science behind cardio or weightlifting. Like, it's exciting to me. That's that Virgo moon. I'm like, oh, this is interesting. I love science. Science. But, yeah, I just think that, like, people aren't going to understand this right now, but it's the most body positive way to experience what I'm going through. I don't want to use any negative terms. Weight loss is like, girl, I lost weight. And it's so funny because my. My man, he. He's so funny. Like, he was the one who kind of, like, brought it to my attention. At first I was like. Because at first I was like. I was like, oh, my gosh, I lost five pounds. He was like, where did it go?

[Jay Shetty]

I was like, what?

[Lizzo]

And I was mad at him. I was like, why would he say that? But he's like, where did it go? You know? I was like, oh, interesting. You know, it's like, I don't think I want to lose anything. I think I want to win. I think I want to gain.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Lizzo]

And I think that, like, I want to be very intentional with the words that come out of my mouth because there's young people who are watching me and they're experiencing, you know, what I'm putting into the world, and they're applying it to their own experience and their own life, just like I did when I was a kid. You know, I saw how the media treated people who gained and lost weight and how that affected my brain chemistry and how it made me. I'm still not perfect. Like, you know, I'll still mess up when I'm talking about things or I'll still have some toxic, you know, diet culture. Things that come in my brain, I just swat it away like a fly. I'm like, no, no, no, no, we're not doing that. We're not doing that. You know, like, this is your body. You only get one of these. Enjoy her and let her enjoy you. So I just want to be very careful with my words and intentional.

[Jay Shetty]

Yeah.

[Lizzo]

And it's not for me because if. If this was all for me, you know, I take this being. Being a public figure very by heart. But if we was sitting alone and we was drinking tequila, I'd be like, well, but it's like, no, like, be careful with your words, because it could affect somebody in ways you don't even know. Even me releasing the weight has affected people. And I take that seriously. I take that responsibility. Responsibility. And so because of that, I want to transmute it into something that makes those people feel comfortable, you know, and feel like, okay, less. Less afraid of it, you know what I mean? And understand it more.

[Jay Shetty]

Lizzo, it has been an Absolute joy talking to you. Oh, my God. You're easy to talk to. You're so much fun. I can tell that you've sat with everything you're saying for so long.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

When I'm listening to you, I can hear the reflection in your voice. I can hear the light, like.

[Lizzo]

Yeah.

[Jay Shetty]

The weight in what you're saying for yourself and for others. And I really respect that because that's actually the hardest part. The hardest part is sitting in no man's land or no person's land and just figuring it out. And I can tell that you've spent so much time there, reflecting, doing the inner work, pushing, healing, questioning, taking responsibility, doing the shadow. Like, that's. That's hard. And I just want to acknowledge that because I. I see you for that. I feel it in your words. I. I hear it. It's very evident to me that you're someone who's really working on that, and that is the hardest work on the planet to do on an individual level.

[Lizzo]

Like, don't nobody want to sit around thinking about how they up, you know, because then you'll just beat yourself up. But I did it anyways, and I was like, I'm going to beat myself up until I end up becoming the best version of myself. And it was really, really hard. And I only share it because I know that someone else might be going through it. Like, go through it. Don't try to, like, stop the journey. You know, you do have to sit and reflect. You do have a. You are. You are the only person in control of you. You know what I mean? And you have to take responsibility for that. And I think that, like, it feels good because then no one else can control your story. No one else can control your joy. I am the author of my story.

[Jay Shetty]

I love it. We end every episode with a final five. These questions have to be answered in one word to one sentence maximum each. So, Lizzo, these are your final five.

[Lizzo]

I'm very bad at this, by the way.

[Jay Shetty]

Okay, the first question is, what is the best advice you've ever heard or received?

[Lizzo]

Know who you are and whose you are.

[Jay Shetty]

Oh, I love that. I've never heard that before. That's beautiful. All right, question number two. What is the worst advice you've ever heard or received?

[Lizzo]

It. Bitch. Crash out.

[Jay Shetty]

Who said that to you?

[Lizzo]

Me.

[Jay Shetty]

You said it to yourself. Oh, my God. That's funny. That's funny. Question number three. This new music, this new album, what is this chapter of your life called?

[Lizzo]

Freedom. I feel very free.

[Jay Shetty]

And that's what People feel when they listen to love and real life.

[Lizzo]

I sure hope so, because that's what I put in it.

[Jay Shetty]

That's beautiful. Question number four. What's the first thing you do every morning and the last thing you do every night?

[Lizzo]

Wow. The first thing I do every morning when I open my eyes is I have a wave of gratitude. It's happened every morning since January 2020. I've woke up and I had a wave of gratitude that almost brings me to tears. I've never cried for, like, all of my life. And then in 2020, I just start crying all the time. And then the last thing I do. I think this is gonna sound like I'm lying. I'm so corny. But I. And it's only because I have anxiety. I think about every person, and I think about my. My family. I think about the family members who aren't here. Think about my dog, Puka, my dad. And I send I. So corny. I know this doesn't sound real. It sounds like I'm only saying this because I talk to you, but I literally, I send, like. There's, like, these weird color points that come out of me in my mind, and I. And they always go to a different person every time. It's like a different color to a different person. And I think about them like, I sent green to my brother, and I sent, like, orange to my sister, and I sent red to my man. Man. And I sent violet and white to my father, and I sent blue to my mother. And it was just. It was so strange. But I. I think about them and I say, oh, my gosh. I just pray over them real quick. I'm like, I pray. I actually don't even pray that they're okay. I thank God they're okay. I know you said one word, but I. I go, thank you.

[Jay Shetty]

This is a beautiful answer.

[Lizzo]

I'm like, thank you for making sure that my family and all my loved ones are safe and healthy. I swear, because I have to. It's the only way I can go to sleep.

[Jay Shetty]

That's beautiful.

[Lizzo]

I believe you.

[Jay Shetty]

I believe that was very in depth. Yeah, that's way too specific to make it up on the spot. That was amazing. Fifth and final question. We asked this to every guest who's ever been on the show. The question is, if you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be?

[Lizzo]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Actually, I just heard about this. I forget the name of the law, but it's. If you, like, think about the world and you're not in it yet. And you don't know how you're going to be born. You don't know. You know what color you're going to be born, what country you're going to be born in. You don't. It's a lottery. How would you design that world not knowing how you would be born in it so that everybody can live happily? And that's how. That's how you move through the world.

[Jay Shetty]

That is so good. I love that. I've never heard that before.

[Lizzo]

That's it.

[Jay Shetty]

That's such a good idea.

[Lizzo]

Design this world, Build this world. Live in this world. As if you don't know what privileges you'll be owed. You don't know how you are going to come into it, what cultures you're going to be a part of so that everyone can benefit and everyone can live happily and freely. How would you design it?

[Jay Shetty]

I love. That is amazing. We never had that answer. Yeah, that is a brilliant, brilliant answer.

[Lizzo]

And the tea is it's the way God designed it. But, you know, we came in here, we added our biases. We put our biases up in this bitch.

[Jay Shetty]

Lizzo, you are so much fun. You are such a bright spark and such a brilliant soul. Like, honestly, your energy is infectious.

[Lizzo]

Thank you.

[Jay Shetty]

And I want to thank you for trusting me with just being so open, so vulnerable, so thoughtful in everything you shared. And I know that. That anyone who listens to this episode is going to feel inspired in their own personal journey, hopefully feel a lot more closer to you. And I can't wait for them to listen to this new album. I cannot wait and love in real life. Hope everyone guys listens. And Still Bad is already my favorite. I'm loving it. So thank you so much for being here. So grateful, genuinely grateful to have spend this time with you. Thank you so much.

[Lizzo]

I really appreciate you. Thank you for the platform. I don't take any of this for granted, so thank you. Me neither.

[Jay Shetty]

If you love this episode, you'll really enjoy my episode with Selena Gomez on befriending your inner critic and how to speak to yourself with more compassion. My fears are only going to continue.

[Lizzo]

To show me what I'm capable of. The more that I face my fears, the more that I feel I'm gaining.

[Jay Shetty]

Strength, I'm gaining wisdom, and I just want to keep doing.

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[Jay Shetty]

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[Lizzo]

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[Jay Shetty]

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[Lizzo]

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[Jay Shetty]

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[Lizzo]

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