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Overcoming Distractions-Thriving with ADHD, ADD
Why Good Habits Are Mission Critical for Adults with ADHD
00:19:56
In this episode, Dave dives into why building strong, consistent habits is a game changer for busy adults with ADHD. If you’re juggling a demanding career, a busy home life, and constant mental clutter, this short episode is for you. In this short...
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- [00:08]
A
I'm Dave Greenwood, and this is Overcoming Distractions. If you are an adult with adhd, a busy professional, an entrepreneur, a high achiever, or just need some strategies to.
- [00:21]
B
Navigate your adult adhd, you're in the right place.
- [00:26]
A
Who am I? I'm an entrepreneur with ADHD and the author of two books, Overcoming Distract and Overcoming Burnout. I coach and mentor people just like you, and together we navigate the ups and downs of adult adhd, from getting out of our own way to helping people just like you thrive in the workplace. That's what I do. Want more info on working with me? Hit overcoming distractions.com ready? Let's get to today's podcast. All right, what's going on, everybody?
- [01:06]
B
It's Dave. As you know, if you've. If you've actually listened to me for any length of time, you know, it's me, it's Dave, and I am the author of Overcoming Distractions, the book, and Overcoming Burnout. And if you are that busy person with adhd, the demanding career, all that stuff going on in life, then you're in the right place.
- [01:34]
C
So.
- [01:34]
B
And as I say almost every week, you know, we don't talk about kids, we don't talk about teenagers or college. This podcast is for you, the busy professional that just might be trying to kind of figure out a different way to. To navigate the ups and downs of adult adhd. So, hey, we talked a couple weeks ago about HAB and how to start or slowly and methodically build tiny habits. We. I kind of based my short episode off James Clear and Atomic Habits, because I do believe that that is one of the best approaches to building habits is kind of slow, methodical, you know, maybe moving the needle a little bit. You know, if. If we decide one weekend that we're going to completely redo the way we work and live and breathe, for example, then I think we know how that's gonna. How that's gonna work.
- [02:51]
C
So.
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B
And I do believe habits and routines are absolutely mission critical, I think, for anybody. But for those of us with adult adhd, I like to say that the way you start your day is probably the way you're going to finish it, good or bad, right? And I think a lot of that has to do with the. The habits and systems that we put in place. And I really understand the concept of building habits slowly, as I mentioned, not to overwhelm us. And when I work with people individually who need some structure, which I think all of us can kind of build more structure, even if it's a little bit we just move that needle forward.
- [03:44]
C
So.
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B
And again, I want to emphasize that again and again because I think it's a key point for us because when we do that, you know, that needle moves in our favor. It eases our tension and our stress that some of us with ADHD can feel, you know, during the day and during the week. Me, for example, I believe I have almost created a bulletproof morning routine in those habits that go along with it. And maybe that comes from my years of making sure we, you know, got to the school bus on time or, you know, did the school drop off on time, made the lunches, etc. Etc. I mean, that's one of many examples. But again, I think that when we. When we can, you know, again, there's a million examples of this, but one of the things is, like, how, you know, what are the habits you create to, like, get your day off to the right start and have some kind of agency and control over that.
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C
So.
- [04:51]
B
So, I mean, those of us, those adults with adhd, I think we face the challenges related to those executive functions, the skills that help us plan, focus, attention, remembering instructions. I'm embarrassed to admit how many times I have to look at some simple instructions for some of the food that I might make at home. Things that I've made hundreds of times. You know, is it. Is it 3/4 of a cup of water? Is it a cup? When does it go in?
- [05:26]
D
Right.
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B
But that's just me.
- [05:29]
D
Right?
- [05:30]
B
And then managing multiple tasks during the day, which, again, if you're that busy person with adhd, that comes with the territory. These are the skills that are essential for managing our daily life. And I think when we are challenged with this, it leads to disorganization, missed deadlines, our poor time management, and in many cases, chronic stress. It's a loss of energy for many of us. And when we're spent, I know a lot of you can relate to this is we just go home and we do them. Scroll.
- [06:03]
D
Right.
- [06:04]
B
So it's something I hear over and over again from many of you. So building those intentional habits, I believe, serves as a strategy. It creates that external structure to support the things that are going on, like, inside of us. So I want to break down the main reasons why good habits are so essential. But I just want to mention one thing before. Habits structure routine. They're mission critical, as I said. But rigidity, such as scheduling things for, like, every 15 minutes of your life, I believe is one of the quickest ways to failure in frustration. And I think when many of us Begin the process of trying to build new habits and routines. We think that we can. Okay, from 7 to 7:15 I'm going to turn on the coffee machine. From 7:15 to 7:30 I'm going to drink my coffee. From 7:30 to 7:45 I'm going to. You know, and I remember working with some people that they color coded the crap out of a spreadsheet and broke it down and it was just intimidating. So let's make sure that what we're building in terms of structure and habits, etc. Are, are, you know, not only meaningful but within our reach and not too rigid. So, so let's discuss reasonable habits and why they're so effective. So number one, I think habits do reduce our mental clutter and they reduce our decision fatigue. Did you know, and I saw this somewhere, that adults make an average of 35,000 decisions per day? I don't know if that's right or not. I bumped into this in a couple places. And for those of us with ADHD who already struggle with like organizing and prioritizing, you know, that can be overwhelming.
- [08:15]
D
Right?
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B
And then decision fatigue results in procrastination, it can result in impulsivity, it could be the complete opposite or just avoidance altogether. Now can you imagine if we agonized over 35,000 decisions, decisions per day? I mean, come on, right? Talk about being exhausted. So, but do you overthink things? Because I know I have been guilty of this over the years and I think a lot of us can say, yeah, you know, I am an overthinker.
- [08:48]
C
So.
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B
You know, more research has, has indicated that, you know, we exhibit greater difficulty in that decision making and that kind of, you know, self regulation under the stress. And we do benefit from the routines and the habits that can kind of maybe ease those moment to moment decisions. So the impact of habits, good habits, meaningful habits, it means we can automate maybe some of our common decisions like when we eat, what to eat, what to wear, how do we start the work day, right? Those types of things, putting things in a place that create a habit for you in the morning so you're not running around looking for stuff like the age old excuse of the car keys, right? So, and it conserves your mental energy for the rest of the day, right. Practical help. Practical habits help us get shit done. Okay. They help lower the tension and stress that we experience regularly. Next, I think habits provide a predictable structure to maybe compensate for our executive functions that may be already at a challenge or deficit.
- [10:11]
D
Right?
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B
So, so you know, working memory, the Task initiation, the planning, those are some of those that can have, you know, we can have a little bit of problem when we have adhd. I think those habits serve as that external scaffolding, if you will, right. To maybe replace the internal systems that, that in many of us are unreliable. I mean, we need systems full stop, and we need good habits. If any of you have spent any time kind of digging into ADHD, you've probably heard, you know, Dr. Russell Barkley. He's one of the leading ADHD researchers of our time. But one of his big things is external structure. It's the schedules, it's the reminders. It's those visible cues and those improve our functioning when we're an adult with adhd. And I like to say I'll dumb it down is things need to be in our face, okay? And that's a habit. I don't care if it's, you know, your morning list on a, on a Sharpie, pasted, whatever, taped to the wall somewhere where you can't avoid it, whatever it is, all right? We need external structure and reminders, I think establishing those kind of daily type of anchors, if you want to call it that, such as the morning routine. Maybe it's a startup list at work. When you, like, you get to your computer, okay, boom, boom, boom. I got to do these things so I can get going. I'm a huge fan of that habit where we do things the night before, before you go to bed. Those reduce anxiety and they actually increase the likelihood of not only getting stuff done the next day, but lowers your stress, whatever the task may be or how big it is. And again, it lowers our stress and it helps us get a good night's sleep. So habits reduce the emotional cost of procrastination and even that kind of negative self talk, right? We. I've talked to more people where we get into this, like, shame discussion because of the. Those patterns of procrastination. We get into guilt. Then we avoid the hours, the days and even weeks go by, and we continue to avoid.
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D
Right.
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B
When tasks aren't, you know, done, initiated, completed on time, we internalize these. What we think is a failure, we think it's a character flaw rather than maybe it's a system, not a system or a symptom of adhd. You, you, you see people like diagnosed late in life where then they realize of what I just said. It's like, oh, that is adhd and I need to work on that. So there are enough studies and you don't need another study to tell you that we do experience, you know, higher levels of that, you know, emotional dysregulation, the self criticism. But I think when we implement even the smallest habits, the routines, those visual planners that we, that we talked about, it does correlate with lower stress and makes us feel a little better. I mean, think about it. Shit, I just drove 45 minutes to work, left my laptop at home. Now you're super stressed out. You may be even embarrassed, right? So that's why these tiny little habits, a habit could be leaving your laptop at the front door so you actually trip on it, okay? I mean, think about it, right? Habits take that guesswork out of, out of us getting started, right? And when it becomes familiar, I think the emotional burden is, is reduced, it becomes consistent and it reinforces more positivity. So habits create like positive momentum, right? And even like some type of reward system. You know anything about adhd? You know, it's, you know, a function or dysfunction, if you will, of like dopamine. And that affects a whole bunch of things for us, right?
- [14:46]
D
It.
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Motivation, our ability to like, continue or sustain effort, you know, keep going without that immediate gratification. I mean, that's why so many experts say, hey, if you've got this big project, you've got to break it down. You've got to break it down into chunks. That's one way. But I think those positive habits, when we do pair them with small rewards, I'll let you be the judge of that. They, they create that kind of feedback loop that many of us might need to sustain, you know, that engagement in whatever it may be.
- [15:32]
C
So.
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B
I think some of us do respond more to novelty rewards. And for many of us, that might be critical for, for maybe long term motivation. Those daily habits actually do include the dopamine boosters that so many of us need. It could be checking off your to do list, right? That feels good. Gamifying, you know, using like a, a habit tracker or a pomodoro or whatever. The thing may be that that helps you maybe gamify things in a certain way or getting the, that visual cue. It just helps us sustain. But you know, what a great reward is not being stressed out week after week, right? I mean, that's, that's a mic drop moment as far as I'm concerned. So. And lastly, and if you've listened to.
- [16:35]
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Me for any length of time, you.
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Know that I do want to talk about burnout, because so many of us feel this way is I think habits over time help us reduce the risk of burnout in a demanding life, professionally and personally. Some of us over overcompensate for disorganization with overwork.
- [16:58]
D
Right?
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B
We stay at the office till 11, we bring stuff home on the weekend. That leads to stressed, we're getting exhausted. And that chronic stress and exhaustion is what we call burnout. Especially those of us juggling that kind of high pressure, demanding career and family responsibilities, etc. Etc. When those of us with ADHD, and there's been more research about this as well, daily routines, even some simple habits, even some boundary setting habits, we were less likely to experience those symptoms related to burnout in, you know, in reverse. Those that have inconsistent habits and routines and no systems in place. We are, we're heading down the burnout road.
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C
So.
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B
But let's be clear about one thing. It's not just workload. I mean if you work 8 to 5 and you're just constantly stressed out and that's your mode of operation at this point, right, you're gonna burn out. Maybe you are getting a work done, but you're just doing it in a constant state of stress. I don't know if that resonates with many of you. So regular habits I think act like a, I don't know, let's call it a shock absorber, right? They create breathing room, they reduce chaos, they protect against maybe even a reactive mode that often leads to burnout. I always say to people that the more you control your day, the more you have agency over your days and your weeks and your work and etc. Going to reduce your risk of burnout. When we operate in in in response mode, day after day after week after month, etc. Then that's going to lead to burnout. All right, I hope I've reinforced that. You do need to start building even the smallest of habits to move the needle in your favor to lower your stress, to get things done. Enjoy your weeks, be fulfilled. Go back a few episodes, look for my super short episode on how I relate Atomic habits and adhd. And if you feel like you can't go it alone and you need somebody by your side to help you kind of problem solve and think these things through, you need somebody to work with. I'd like that opportunity. Just hit my website, overcoming distractions.com, hit that 15 minute button and let's see if it's a good idea for us to work together. All right, see you next time.