Kim Gravel on Digital Safety, Social Media, and Real-Life Parenting

Summary

Podcast Summary: Parenting in a Tech World

Episode: Kim Gravel on Digital Safety, Social Media, and Real-Life Parenting
Host: Titania Jordan (Bark Technologies)
Guest: Kim Gravel (Entrepreneur, Author, Mom)
Date: January 13, 2026

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Overview

This episode features an insightful, candid discussion between host Titania Jordan and Kim Gravel about the immense challenges and blessings of parenting in today’s technology-driven world. Touching on digital safety, setting boundaries, real-world stories of tech pitfalls, the power of parental involvement, and faith, the episode offers actionable advice and encouragement for families navigating online risks.

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Major Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Challenges and Realities of Parenting Teens with Tech

• The hosts set the stage by bonding over the universal struggles of parenting teens, especially boys ([01:15]-[02:59]).

• Kim emphasizes that parenting doesn't end at 18, and the digital landscape has made it vastly more complicated.

  Quote:
  "Parenting today in the digital world is tough." — Kim Gravel ([03:35])

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2. The Blessings and Dangers of Technology

• Kim describes herself as a "challenged blessing" mom: grateful for tech’s conveniences but highly wary of its dangers ([04:21]-[05:03]).

• She calls tech a potential “piranha” for kids.

• The conversation stresses tech is not a babysitter; kids got phones at 13 despite peer pressure for earlier access.

• Shift: In the past, “bad stuff” had to be sought out. Now, it seeks out children ([05:03]-[06:20]).

  Quote:
  “What's bad on the Internet? What's bad with these phones are coming after our kids. ... Now it's coming to find them." — Kim Gravel ([05:03]-[05:38])

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3. Guardrails, Monitoring, and the Role of Parental Controls

• Kim shares how she uses Bark and why she prefers it over competitors: it's customizable, effective, and gives her a sense of control ([06:25]-[06:56]).

• Titania and Kim agree that kids need— and even want—boundaries, even if they protest.

  Quote:
  “The kid. Children really want the boundaries.” — Kim Gravel ([06:56])
  “They want guardrails.” — Titania Jordan ([06:57])

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4. The Importance of Conversation & Honesty with Kids

• Open, ongoing dialogue is a constant in Kim’s home. Kids know they are monitored—not as a breach of trust, but as a show of love ([15:43]-[16:13]).
• Model transparency: “Don’t be sneaky. ... The best thing to do is let your kid know, yes, I’m watching.” — Kim Gravel ([16:09])
• Kids are smarter than we realize; honesty earns respect ([16:27]-[16:50]).

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5. Social Media is Not Actually ‘Social’ (And Why That Matters)

• Kim advises teaching children to see social media as a business tool—a place for promotion and information, not for authentic social lives ([09:35]-[11:16]).

• She warns against comparing real life to curated “highlight reels,” which leads to self-esteem issues.

  Quote:
  “They call it social media, but that's a very—that's a lie. ... It's a place to display, promote, and ... create content ... but don't mistake it for building relationship and being social.” — Kim Gravel ([10:34]-[10:54])

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6. The Dark Side: Bullying, Predators, and Mental Health

• Discussion of bullying’s pervasive presence: ~70% of connected kids experience bullying as victim, perpetrator, or bystander ([23:40]-[24:13]).

• The online environment magnifies negative impacts: bullying, exposure to inappropriate content, and even suicide risk ([24:13]-[24:55]).

• The hosts stress that “words do hurt” and parents must be aware of online predatory behaviors ([24:46]-[25:33]).

  Quote:
  “We all have to wake up and realize that according to the FBI, there's over half a million of [online predators] at any given time.” — Titania Jordan ([25:14])

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7. Parental Action Steps and Advice

Delaying and Managing Access

• “Delay is the way”—hold off on devices and social media access as long as possible, despite social pressure ([28:04]-[28:05]).
• When introducing tech, pick “safer tech” (e.g., not iPhone or Apple Watch); keep all connected devices out of bedrooms ([28:05]-[28:39]).
• Parental controls and monitoring apps like Bark are described as “non-negotiable” if kids have tech access ([25:33]-[26:35]).

Modeling Behavior

• Adults need to model appropriate tech use: prioritize face-to-face interaction, avoid nighttime scrolling, and be mindful of adult tech habits ([28:58]-[29:10]).

For Grandparents

• Grandparents have a crucial, positive role; they too should learn about tech and help enable safeguards for grandkids ([29:20]-[30:23]).

  Quote:
  “Please get technology like this. ... You buy that for your grandkids, your grandbabies, because ... the children are our future, and they really are.” — Kim Gravel ([29:25]-[30:23])

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8. Personal Pitfalls with Technology

• Kim speaks humorously about her “doom scrolling” habit and the science of digital addiction ([17:51]-[19:25]).
• The hosts discuss privacy concerns: devices listening even when not in use, and how algorithms target users’ vulnerabilities ([19:25]-[20:34]).

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9. Faith, Hope, and Parental Authority

• Both guests express their Christian faith as a grounding practice ([20:34]-[21:25]).
• They discuss listening to inner warnings, staying attuned to children’s moods, and providing holistic guidance—academically, emotionally, and socially ([21:25]-[22:34]).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "It’s not the technology that’s bad, it’s how we’re using it that is bad." — Kim Gravel ([25:40])
• "You gotta start with your kids. ... We're giving them such a responsibility by handing them a device. So we have to train them to be able to handle that responsibility." — Kim Gravel ([22:15]-[22:34])
• “Trying is now a bad thing. ... People can say what they want behind the screen.” — Kim Gravel ([23:09])
• “Good kids make bad choices all day.” — Titania Jordan ([31:20])

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Key Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:15–03:35: Shared parenting struggles with teens in a tech world
• 04:21–06:20: Technology’s blessings and dangers; piranha metaphor
• 06:25–07:14: Why Bark? Boundaries, control, and alert system
• 09:35–11:16: Teaching kids about the real nature and purpose of social media
• 15:43–16:13: The need for open, honest monitoring and communication
• 17:51–19:25: Digital addiction, doom scrolling, and how the feed hooks both adults and kids
• 23:40–25:33: Bullying, predators, and the heartbreaking data
• 28:05–28:39: Tech rules: safer devices, no devices in bedrooms
• 29:20–30:23: Grandparents’ role in digital safety
• 31:20–32:00: Digital mistakes are permanent; “forever, ever” threats
• 34:00–35:23: Closing banter, humor, and reminders

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Final Thoughts

Kim and Titania blend humor, real talk, and deep empathy to spotlight that it is possible—if not easy—to parent effectively in a digital age. Their advice: start early, set boundaries, use smart tools, be honest, model positive habits, stay connected, and never be afraid to have uncomfortable conversations. There is hope—and strength in community and proactive parenting.

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A must-listen for any family raising kids in the digital world.

Transcript

[A]

We are so excited to welcome Kim Gravel to the podcast. Entrepreneur, TV personality, author, life coach, and a former Miss Georgia. But she's also a mom. Navigating the same online challenges so many families face. Kim trusts Bark to help keep her kids safer online. And today she's opening up about why digital safety matters more than ever. Kim, you are here.

[B]

Okay, that was a great intro. I'm just gonna have that and read it whenever I'm feeling, like, stressed as a mom of two teenage kids.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

A semi young adult because he's a male, so they don't. That takes him longer until five years.

[A]

I've been telling people that the brain doesn't mature the frontal lobe of the brain until about 25. A new research just came out that said adolescents actually last to about 30, 32. And that checks out.

[B]

Yeah. Especially for dudes.

[A]

100%. No offense to dudes. It's just.

[B]

They're my men.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I'm telling you, parenting is tough.

[A]

It doesn't tough, and it doesn't stop at 18.

[B]

Oh, my gosh. Mine's just getting started because I have an 18 and 16 year old, so.

[A]

Yes, I have a 16 year old too. He's almost 17. We have so much to talk about.

[B]

Okay, let's go. Okay.

[A]

All right. Okay, so first of all, I just wanna say shout out to.

[B]

Mm. I think I know what you're gonna say.

[A]

What?

[B]

Are we the same person?

[A]

I think so.

[B]

Are we? I knew you had good hair, but I was like, are we the same person? I do have good hair. Aw. I was fishing for that compliment. So thank you.

[A]

But can we talk about it for a minute? It's perfect. It's like the volume.

[B]

Can I just. But this is how moms like teenage boys talk.

[A]

I know.

[B]

It's almost like we just grunt and we know exactly what we're saying.

[A]

So we have already bonded. We've known each other for 16 minutes, and here we are. And I'm sweating because I'm 45, even though it's 45 degrees outside.

[B]

Are you pre menopausal or are you in the throes of menopause?

[A]

I think I'm already. I think so. Yeah. I found out that we're just gonna go there because she's postmenopausal. Yeah, dude, me too. But, like, apparently, according to someone I'm seeing right now, who's helping me with what do I eat and how much do I eat? Because I can't seem to lose weight because I restricted my calories for so long, I put my body into early menopause.

[B]

What?

[A]

Yeah, right. Never heard that. And I'm like, you mean to tell me if I would have eaten more food over the past 20 years, I wouldn't have to be having estrogen patches right now? And like, well, maybe that's why I

[B]

don't have the symptoms. Cause I overeat my whole life.

[A]

Basically, the moral story is, as a woman, you can't win.

[B]

Eat, eat.

[A]

You can't win. Eat more food, eat more calories.

[B]

I love that.

[A]

Anyway, this podcast is not about menopause. Although if you talk about it with

[B]

parenting, it can be.

[A]

Yeah, you message us, right? And now I'm crying all the time.

[B]

And you have a teenage son.

[A]

Oh, Lord, help me.

[B]

That is online how, like 247 SIS

[A]

all the time and doesn't care about what you have to say or spending time with you. They love you, but they don't want to be with you, which is wild.

[B]

But part of me don't want to be with them either. So it works out, but I still have to monitor, you know what I'm saying? It's tough. It's tough. Parenting today in the digital world is tough.

[A]

Not easy. It's so hard. So we'll bring it back. We'll bring it back to again. You want to talk about lady stuff? DM me. I'm on all the places. I'm super candid. I have no filter directly. Right. I do have a filter when it comes to bark because I love my job and I want to keep my job, but directly, I'll tell you whatever you need to know. And Kim, I just. I love you already. Let's talk about your two kids.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

What has it been like raising them in this insane digital landscape?

[B]

A challenged blessing, I would say, because I am beyond helicopter and I'm a type, a little bit of a control freak. What? So I'm like, this is not a shocker to people who know me and I'm very upfront about it, but when I had children and then the digital component came in, because I love social media, I love AI, I love anything digital. I think it is a game changer when it comes to the ease of life, the ease of business, but when it comes to raising children, it is a piranha. It can be very, very dangerous.

[A]

Ooh, that's a great analogy.

[B]

Do you know what I mean?

[A]

100%.

[B]

So when I say it's a challenge blessing, I truly mean that, not only as a parent, but raising it in a modern day age. Like we are in because it's not a babysitter. And I think when I first introduced technology to my kids, now they couldn't get a phone till they were 13. Okay, it's smart. It was smart, but it was hard in a challenging situation when everybody at school had one at nine or 10, of course, and that was like, what, over 10 years? Over a decade ago. So, you know, everything has changed, and there's so many good things about it. But let me tell you something, and I'm talking to somebody listening right now. What's bad on the Internet? What's bad with these phones are coming after our kids. It's not like back in the day when you and I were coming up, we'd have to go find the dirty, we'd have to go find the bad. Now it's coming to find them. That was an eye opener for me. That's why I downloaded bark. And I'm not this. I'm not. This is not a shameful plug. I mean, it's serious. I looked at every safety app I could find to alert, protect, and be that helicopter when I couldn't be there.

[A]

What made you choose bark over all the other options?

[B]

They get the job done. I mean, it got to the point I'm like every little thing. I mean, and you can control it. You can control the level of sensitivity and the level of what they see. And of course, I put it on high alert. So it was always. I mean, it was barking more than I needed it to. Right. But it was the control aspect again. Going back to my type A, I had some control over what they were seeing, and it worked. The kid. Children really want the boundaries.

[A]

They want guardrails.

[B]

They do.

[A]

They don't necessarily always think they want them, but they sure as you know what, respect them.

[B]

Well, if they're acting out as kids and misbehaving as kids or doing things they shouldn't be doing as kids. That is a scream and a cry for help that they do want the guardrails, right?

[A]

Double click on that.

[B]

Do you see what I'm saying? Lean into that. That is a Help me, help me,

[A]

help me, help me. Oh, man. Man, I wish I could do that.

[B]

Don't we do that? I do that as, like when I get angry or whatever. Gosh, what kind of podcast is this? We're going to eat. I'm gonna let you go. I got the hush. You're bringing out the crazy in me, girl. I'm loving it.

[A]

We'll bill each other for the therapy, but it'll Cancel out. Okay, so it's free.

[B]

We're free. All we need is a meal, and we're good.

[A]

Yes. Everybody listening and watching right now. You drop in the comments, in the DMs, what you're struggling with, and we'll just get through it all together.

[B]

And the struggle is real.

[A]

It is very real. It is very real. But what helps me personally is just gratitude. Like, it was interesting. So this past Thanksgiving was the first Thanksgiving that I wasn't with the family that I had been with for 20 years. And parts of it were beautiful and parts of it really sad. And I was so just deeply sad. But in the midst of it, I was like, God, thank you.

[B]

Oh, come on now.

[A]

Thank you for the beauty that I was able to experience with these people. Please cover them with your love, with your blessings. Help us all to, you know, have peace in this new normal. And thank you that I care so much. And it wasn't like it didn't just. My pain just didn't all go away, because that's not how prayer works. It can, but not necessarily right. But it just. It's about perspective. If you can find the gratitude and, like, even the tough moments with your kids, it can help. But I'm gonna go.

[B]

Cause God is good.

[A]

He's so good. He's so good.

[B]

And even when we are not, he is good.

[A]

And thank God for that.

[B]

Right? That's a whole nother podcast.

[A]

That's a whole nother podcast. So you mentioned you use bark, and I'm so glad you do.

[B]

I do. Genuinely do.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Like, a lot of my circle does.

[A]

Oh, great.

[B]

A lot of my mom's circle, because, like, I'm 54, and I've always been, like, 10 years older than most people in my mom's circle. So I've been like the old lady of the group. I've been the golden girl.

[A]

So in addition to the tools that you've used to help you parent in a world surrounded by technology that we did not grow up in.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

What sort of discussions have you had with your kids about the world now and specifically online safety? That's a big question.

[B]

Well, you know, let's start with social media, because social media is such a amazing, informative, entertaining, and productive platforms. Right. And you have so many. But at the same time, where there's good, there's gonna be that polar opposite, which is there's some evil, there's some predatory, there's some bullying aspects to it, too. So from a very young age, my kids are not on social Media posting as much unless it's about. They have little businesses, which is smart. It's smart. And I said, you know, and I use social media, not my business. And I love it. I love shopping, I love watching, I love consuming the content. But when it comes to. It's not social. How about that? Let me just say that they call it social media, but that's a very. That's a lie.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Social media and the Internet is not a place to be social. It's a place to display, promote, and, you know, create content. In my opinion, that uplifts, but don't mistake it for building relationship and being social.

[A]

Authentic.

[B]

Correct. So that's what I taught my kids at a very young. I mean, you're comparing your highlight reel, others highlight reels to your everyday life, which is. Right. Which is not always. Which is not always rainbows and glitter and gold and glam. So I taught them very young that it's a business tool. It's not a social tool.

[A]

I love that. Oh, I love that.

[B]

And it sunk in. And the beautiful thing about children is when you do not think they're listening. And I know this because I was a child and now I repeat everything back to my kids that my parents taught me when I was young. Hard work pays out. You know, the whole nine yards. All the crap we heard in the

[A]

80s, early to bed, early to rise, makes a bed. Healthy wellness.

[B]

Okay. All the things, you know, what you put out comes back. I mean, I could just go. We could just take a podcast and just do the sound bites from the 80s that our parents taught us. So I know that they're listening. So when I talk to younger parents who are dealing and navigating this, because, I mean, I don't know how graphic we can be, but porn is a real problem.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Which I think is hilarious. Cause on social media you have to call it corn. Right. You can cuss every way from 2000 to today with every curse word in the planet you can say. But you cannot say porn on the Internet. That just goes to show you how.

[A]

How.

[B]

What's the word I'm looking for? I'm looking for a deep word. Maybe I should.

[A]

It's not ironic, but it's messed up is what it is. Because they'll show you.

[B]

It's bass ackwards.

[A]

That's exactly it. They'll show it to you in your feed. It's one to three clicks away. But if you use the word, it's a bad thing. Right.

[B]

It's coming after our boys and our girls.

[A]

100%.

[B]

100%. And that's what I'm saying. It's predatory, so you have to be careful. Now let's talk about other platforms because I love it about bark. Cause it goes all, it goes everywhere.

[A]

And even ChatGPT.

[B]

Correct. That's the beautiful thing about this technology. Not only is it easy to use, it is thorough, but there's so much to monitor that there's no way it would take a full time employee just to monitor your kids phones and devices.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. That's the beauty of bark. That's why smart parents like you have been using our app and our smartphone and our smart watch and our in home device for now over a decade.

[B]

It works.

[A]

And what's so wild to me is whenever I'm out and about and I hear a parent say I didn't know about bark, I'm like, have you been living under a rock? How did you not know that?

[B]

Again, I think people, I don't think everybody, you know?

[A]

Yeah, I know.

[B]

Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah, I don't think everybody. There's a fear to kids with technology and the accountability there, I think for parents too. Because what happens when you do find out something?

[A]

Right, right. Ignorance sometimes is bliss.

[B]

Correct. So how do you at that point approach that subject? Because I mean I'm not to throw my kids under the bus, but I have found through bark, some things that my kids have seen and dealt with and experienced that we had to have some tough conversations 100%.

[A]

And back to that, that point of it'd be like finding out the best, most entertaining. Your favorite babysitter that your kids listen to was actually really bad and toxic for them.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

Because we're using iPads and social media smartphones as babysitters and it's like, oh no, now what are we doing?

[B]

And entertainment. It's like, remember when we used to go and sit and turn on the TV and we would watch the Carol Burnett show? I think I'm older than you, so I've just really aged.

[A]

That's all I was allowed to watch basically.

[B]

So right now, I mean if you know this one, I'm done. The Barbara, the Mandrell sisters. Did you?

[A]

Yes, of course. Andy Griffin.

[B]

Hee Haw.

[A]

All of it.

[B]

Yeah. Miami Vice. Yes. Okay, so that was three channels. You had three channels and you had to do the rabbit ears to make sure. So do you remember that was a family experience. So when you consumed your content, it was a family friendly experience.

[A]

And there were standards. There were standards. That if you violated the standards, you'd be fined, your show would be kicked off the network.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

Nobody wanted that.

[B]

Nope. Now it's different.

[A]

It's everything.

[B]

All the time.

[A]

All the time. Your kid can access the entire world, good and bad, and the entire world can access your children. Unless you have set up specific precautions. And let's go into the. What advice would you give? As you're the mama bear about 10 years ahead of the rest of your mama friends, what advice would you give parents who have younger kids and are contemplating a smartphone, a smartwatch, a gaming console, social media? Any of it? What. What would you shake them to be like, listen up, parents.

[B]

Take a class. Ooh, take a class. And I don't mean go and actually, like, take your own class. Have guardrails, have apps. I would suggest Bark. Have apps like Bark that you can start them out without accountability. And don't be sneaky about it. The best thing to do is let your kid know, yes, I'm watching.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I am monitoring everything you're doing.

[A]

And much like when your toddler is fighting getting in a car seat, they don't wanna be constrained. You're like, I get it. It might not be comfortable. It could save your life. I'm doing this because it's the best for you, because I love you, not because I'm trying to be controllable and

[B]

be honest about it. Yeah. I think kids are smarter than we give them credit for. I always say this. Audiences are smarter than we get. I'm a business owner and you can't get one over on people. People recognize true authenticity and they accept it. And the same is true with our kids. So, like, I started that very, very young. So before you even hand over the $2,000 piece of equipment.

[A]

Right. Right.

[B]

To a 13 year old or however. I mean, 13 was my magic age. Right. Whatever your age is, there's no judgment there. When you hand that over, let them know, I am watching everything. And don't think, oh, I only put those apps on there, honey. They can hide apps in a calculator. Did y' all know that they have little apps that you like? There's so many ways. And these kids are, at nine years old, way smarter than us.

[A]

Yeah. Like, do you want to play whack a Mole or do you want to get smarter about it?

[B]

Well, let Bart be the whack a mole.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

That's part of what we do. That's what I did.

[A]

That's what we do.

[B]

I mean, I'm not trying to do a Hard sell. Because, you know, that's. It's not even a luxury anymore. It's a necessity. If you hand your kids technology.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. The next thing I want to talk about, if you're comfortable talking about it, anything, what are some of the pitfalls that you have personally experienced with tech and social media?

[B]

Me as a person, not with my kids.

[A]

Yeah,

[B]

you're a public figure. What are they called today? What is it called? Doom scrolling.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, I loved a doom scroll.

[A]

What gets you the most?

[B]

The funny videos of people falling. Well, see that's like last night I'd send a video out to my whole family. There's a guy and he's at his mom's funeral and they're singing the thong song. Have you seen that one yet?

[A]

No.

[B]

Oh, y', all, that's my sister's funeral. We'll have a whole choir singing the thong song about my sister. Cause she can drop it like it's hot. So I'm just saying, like, it's stuff like that that gets me going 100%. Like I'm not a political person. So I don't get on. I don't want to hear all, you know, the sky's falling, the apocalypse is happening. If it does, listen, I'll be on your zombie team and fight them all day long. I don't want to hear about all that. I want to have fun. So, you know, and doom scrolling is my downfall because it's so entertaining. I can see why the kids are obsessed and addicted to.

[A]

Well, yeah, I am the literal science that goes into what hooks you, what keeps you in that application or website. And that's what we need to communicate to our children is I understand why you can't put this down, which is feeding you.

[B]

It's called a feed for a reason.

[A]

100%. And it's spiking your dopamine levels 10x what any other normal thing that you might find joy from would. So it's understandable why even outsize draw to that versus like Legos or walking in nature and we need to recalibrate that.

[B]

Well, yeah, you're preaching to the choir here. I need to hear that. But like I'm going to give you an example of what technology is today. So yesterday we had a business call. It was about a 30 minute call and we were talking about a certain product that someone's wanting us to bring to market. And we never looked it up on our devices, we never googled it, we never searched it in our search engine. And Amy, my very best Friend and business partner as we were driving here this morning. She goes, hey. She goes, did we ever say the name of that business that we were going to bring tomorrow? I said, yeah, we said the name. She goes, but I never looked it up. She said, but on my feed were all the ads for that product, y'. All. That is what's coming for your kids.

[A]

They're in our brains.

[B]

Amy's up there going, hallelujah. Amen.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yes. Yeah. Like, if you pull up my search on Instagram right now, you see my deepest fears, insecurities, longings, and I'm like, y' all aren't right.

[B]

But this is the thing. This is why I have hope. You know, I'm a person of faith, and so I know who's really in control.

[A]

Amen.

[B]

And it's not our algorithm.

[A]

Amen. Okay, but you gotta put him first.

[B]

Well, he's my everything, so.

[A]

And what I mean by that is, you know, when this thing first came out, I was like, I'm now James Bond or Inspector Gadget, if you know who that is. I'm like, I can do all the things. Well, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

[B]

Well, we are going there. Cause we can go there.

[A]

This is Titania's opinion, not bark's opinion. I have to disclose that. But when I open up my phone, the first thing I do is I open my Bible app and I read a Bible verse, because that's number one. Not who texted me, not my Instagram notifications, not my email. And I just try to. I'm like, God, this thing has a hold on me, but I'm gonna put you first and set my day off. Right.

[B]

But that's what you're saying. You still have control over you. It does not have control. So back to what we tell our kids. And what I have to tell myself, even to hold myself accountable, is, you know when that still small voice pricks your heart and you know, this is not good for me. Like, can I just tell y', all, I know when my kids. Not only do I have bark, but I can tell by my kids disposition. I can tell by their attitude. I can tell by how they talk to me what's going on. It's being that in tune with your kids. Be so raw and open with your kids about sex, about dating. We will hell hack our kids to death about grades, but do the same thing about dating and have a plan and have a. Have a. I mean, I always say, have a goal, have a plan, work the plan. And then be flexible. But like, you gotta start with your kids. Like, we're giving them such a responsibility by handing them a device. So we have to train them to be able to handle that responsibility.

[A]

Right. Like, I'm sure you didn't send your then third grader out into the woods with a chainsaw. Like, we just wouldn't do that. Right, right. And this thing is a powerful tool that has the power to end lives and ruin lives. And so.

[B]

Well, it did. It really affected my oldest son for a long, long time because he got caught up in it, the cyber bullying part of it, you know, and that. That he would even post positive things and all of his friends and stuff

[A]

would pile on because it's.

[B]

Oh, you try hard. You're the. I mean, I'm like, loser. Yeah.

[A]

And that's nice.

[B]

Trying is now a bad thing. Like. Like putting forth effort is now bad. I mean, you know, I'm saying, like, it's. It. People can say what they want to say behind the screen. But you say, kim, how do you. How did you teach him how to combat that? It was tough, but I said, get off the app.

[A]

Yeah, just get off, get off, log off.

[B]

It can't be about business because this is not a social place.

[A]

Right, Right.

[B]

Social happens right here with all of us.

[A]

Authentic social.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

You mentioned bullying. About 70% of kids are encountering it either as a bully, victim or witness online.

[B]

Correct.

[A]

That's per our data at bark.

[B]

How much?

[A]

70%. 70% of online of kids that are connected.

[B]

Social media. Yeah.

[A]

Either as a bully, victim or witness. And that can be the second grader who's in a text group thread with 10 other second graders and they're all piling on and they're just watching it and they're learning how other kids are talking to each other and they are thinking, is this how I need to act to be cool and accepted?

[B]

Or they shrink back and don't defend and just go along.

[A]

They don't step up or they don't step up or they're the target. Right. And they shrink and they try to conform or their mental health is negatively impacted. And that's just bullying. We haven't even gone to the darkest, deepest parts, which is suicide, which is the second leading cause of death in children in this nation. Second leading cause, Kim, that just shouldn't be. That wasn't the case when we were growing up. And what has changed? Right. What's the access?

[B]

And I'm gonna say for absolutely nothing, when people say sticks and stones will break My bones. What words will never hurt me. That's a lie.

[A]

Wrong. That's a lie.

[B]

That's a lie.

[A]

100% lie. Yeah, I never understood that. Whoever made that up. No, you're wrong. Predators. You know, the amount of bad people out there that are looking to hurt kids is unfathomable. It is so hard for me and my heart to think that there is anybody out there that would proactively work to hurt a child. But we all have to wake up and realize that according to the FBI, there's over half a million of them online at any given time. They know where your kids are and they are working very hard to groom them and exploit them.

[B]

That's why things like bark are non negotiables. They really aren't. Especially if you're going to have technology in your home and in your house and. And like for the longest time I would not get a echo. I would not get okay. Because I was like, I don't want anybody listening. I never forget Amy said, she goes, well, they're listening with your phone. So it's like, it's not the technology that's bad, it's how we're using it that is bad. But we have to talk about how we can use it for good as well. Like we can't feed the bad all the time. You protect from the bad. Like you said, there's predators proactively. We have to proactively protect and then proactively use it for good. There's hope.

[A]

There is hope.

[B]

There's always hope.

[A]

There is hope.

[B]

And it's apps like this and it's parents like us and all the parents listening that are wanting to really protect and proactively help their children navigate until they're like you said, their frontal, what is it? Cortex.

[A]

Frontal lobes.

[B]

Frontal lobes, whatever it's called. Whatever it's called. Some cortex.

[A]

Dr. Kim and Dr. Titania.

[B]

Yeah, doctor. Okay, I need to go to the doctor. No, but you know what I'm saying, until that gets where it is, can make these logical, healthy decisions. We have to implement technology like this. We have to. It's a no brainer and you gotta do it.

[A]

So, Kim, I have a request. You don't have to do this, but you reach such a large audience and my hope is that when this goes live, you'll share some part of it with them.

[B]

Absolutely. The whole thing. I believe in this.

[A]

Thank you. So given that, I just want to go off a little bit on what these parents need to do because we've spent the past Half hour talking about the bad, talking about the dangers, talking about the scary. We've told people a little bit of what they need to do. But as you and I were talking before we were rolling of just like, I hate it when major news outlets only give you 30 seconds to tell people everything they need to know. Well, we have the freedom to do whatever we want right now. So, Kim, for your amazing audience, I want them to know that first of all, they're not alone. It is very hard. Second thing is that they need to be confident to be the parent that they are supposed to be. Right. Fight, fight, fight for your children. You know what's best for them. Delay is the way. I can't take credit for that. Our friend Chris McKenna at Protect Young Eyes came up with that. And it's good. Delay is the way. You do not have to give your kid access to whatever.

[B]

So young.

[A]

Yeah, you'll regret it. Next thing is, if and when it's time for safer tech, or if and when it's time for tech, choose safer tech. That means not the iPhone and not the Apple watch. If you want to know why Apple is the worst choice for children, drop me a comment. I'll tell you why. Next thing, and this is free advice. No connected tech in the bedroom or behind closed doors.

[B]

Amen.

[A]

Just. It doesn't belong there.

[B]

Or computers or anything.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

Yeah, nothing.

[A]

If it has a power cord, it can connect to the Internet or cell signal. Not in the bedroom.

[B]

And we've lived by that and still live by that. I have an 18 year old son.

[A]

So smart. So smart and healthy. And for us too. We don't need to be picking up our phones in the middle of the night. Well, I know.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I know.

[B]

Okay, go ahead, keep going.

[A]

Okay, so on that point, I don't know if I'm on D or 12, but anyway, live by example.

[B]

Y.

[A]

You know I've got this by me, right? And this on my lap and this on my wrist. But like, prioritize human connection. When your kid's talking to you, you look at them. Don't look at your phone.

[B]

Don't shame. And it's easier said than done, though.

[A]

It is.

[B]

I know. It's easier said than done.

[A]

I know it is. So, yeah, safer tech. No connected tech behind closed doors.

[B]

Can I say something to the grandparents listening?

[A]

Yes. Oh my gosh, yes.

[B]

The grandparents have such a matriarch and patriarch voice to these kids. And I love it. My dad is 80, my mom is 78. And they're both really, really trying to get into the tech of it all. Even AI love it. And it has been so glorious to watch my mom talk to. And she also has a good news club. She goes into the local schools afterwards and do an after school program. And she's talking about technology, safety and technology. Protecting your eyes and protecting your ears, even to young kids. Can I just say something to the grandparents out there? Please get technology like this. It's really easy to learn and navigate, and you buy that for your grandkids, your grandbabies, because y', all. As Whitney Houston said, may she rest in peace, I believe the children are our future, and they really are. But we are raising

[A]

kids that are numb, desensitized.

[B]

They are to some of the dangers and the realities, but they're also hungry for hope. And I will tell you, technology can be your friend as long as it's used wisely. It's almost like drinking, right? We will not let our kids drink or drive under a certain age, but we'll give them a phone that can teach him how to do it early

[A]

on, make it make sense.

[B]

It doesn't. And listen, I'm guilty. I'm guilty. And like, my husband was like, this is overwhelming. I said, I know, but we have to learn it. You have to challenge yourself, to grow yourself as a parent. Cause I ain't got time for all of that.

[A]

Nobody does.

[B]

But we had to make time. I mean, and it's been a struggle. I wish Amy could step on here and talk about it, because she has seen me cry about it. She has seen me. Because when you see your kids and what they're looking at, you're like, my children, y'. All. I'm not kidding you.

[A]

Good kids make bad choices all day.

[B]

I did.

[A]

I did.

[B]

They just can make it a lot easier. And very isolated.

[A]

And it's captured digitally in perpetuity forever.

[B]

Forever.

[A]

Forever, ever.

[B]

They're like, what? Snapchat. Oh, y', all, let me text.

[A]

It does not disappear.

[B]

No.

[A]

Yeah. Kim, you have dropped so much knowledge today. And I just want to thank you for being a beacon of strength that moms and women can look up to. An entrepreneur. Just. We need more strong, outspoken leaders like you helping us navigate all of this.

[B]

I appreciate that, but can I just say. And I get emotional talking about it, because I'm not that strong. I serve the one that is, but I'm not that strong. But I love my kids and your kids and so much. I've seen so many horrible things happen to good people that could have been preventable.

[A]

That's yes, the preventable. This didn't have to end this way.

[B]

Didn't have to do it. We have the power. We have the control. We're all type A parents.

[A]

We all need to be really.

[B]

Honestly, it's not a bad thing. Helicopter is not a bad thing.

[A]

Right? Well, use bark. Please use bark. I mean, just, I don't want to

[B]

hard sell it because, you know, that's my business. I'm on qvc and we have a huge platform and live social selling and all that. But I only really talk about products

[A]

that work that you believe in.

[B]

Cause as women, we gon buy 100%. Cause there's another app, I won't say it on here, that I bought to do this first, and it just wasn't working for me. And so when I went to bark and then I started, you know, the mom group chat and everybody was on it, I was like, okay, this is. It's reasonable. It's adjustable and it's easy. Easy click of a button.

[A]

Easy. Wow.

[B]

Like, if you can flip on your computer, you can do bark.

[A]

Amazing. Well, I'm buying what you're selling and you're not selling bark. I'm not a bark.

[B]

I'm not selling bark.

[A]

I'm just selling. It's my job.

[B]

I'm backing you up.

[A]

But regardless whether or not you use bark or get the bark smartphone or get the bark smartwatch, do something. Do something. Keep the tech out of the bedrooms. Talk to your kids about these issues frequently. Early.

[B]

There's. There's a phone and a.

[A]

There's a phone.

[B]

And it's more than just the app.

[A]

It's more than just the app.

[B]

Oh, right.

[A]

Oh, right. The phone doesn't even allow kids to take nudes.

[B]

Girl, I got to talk to y' all about going on qvc.

[A]

Yeah, you do.

[B]

When are we going to talk about that?

[A]

Let's do that.

[B]

Call me.

[A]

Okay, great.

[B]

Yeah, give me. I'm not kidding you.

[A]

I'm not kidding either.

[B]

I did not know there was a phone in that.

[A]

We have a smartphone.

[B]

Duh.

[A]

Yeah, I know. It's a no brainer. It's a no brainer.

[B]

Y' all need to call me.

[A]

Okay, great. Do we have. Do we have contact info? Wonderful.

[B]

Oh, we get ready to take this to a whole nother level, sister. And you need to keep this in the podcast. I did not know that. Did you know that, Amy, she has no kids now.

[A]

I'm really hot.

[B]

That's why she looks young and thin and has lots of money. There you go. We're gonna end it right there.

[A]

I think that that is a good place to end.

[B]

Now, what's your philosophy? She goes. She's not married. She says, no kids, no husband, no wrinkles. There you go.

[A]

That's epic. May we all have an Amy in our lives.

[B]

Maybe I'll be an Amy.

[A]

Live like Amy.

[B]

Live like Amy. Live like Amy.

[A]

T shirt. That'll sell out on qvc.

[B]

Easy pay. We're doing it.

[A]

All right. Kim, we could talk for hours.

[B]

I know.

[A]

I would love to talk to you more.

[B]

We need to.

[A]

Okay, let's do it. May God bless you and your family.

[B]

You too, my love.

[A]

And thank you all so much for tuning in. This is one of my favorite episodes ever.

[B]

Mine, too. It's a good subject. Needed.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

I got to talk to you about the phones, too. Okay. Okay.

[A]

Bye.

[B]

Bye.