Elias Weiss Friedman (The Dogist) on How Dogs Help Us To Matter More | EP 688

Summary

Passion Struck with John R. Miles

Episode 688: Elias Weiss Friedman (The Dogist) on How Dogs Help Us To Matter More

Release Date: November 11, 2025
Guest: Elias Weiss Friedman (“The Doggist”)
Theme: How our connection with dogs reveals and shapes our humanity, enhances our well-being, and helps us “matter more.”

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Episode Overview

In this heart-centered episode, John R. Miles sits down with Elias Weiss Friedman, the sensational street photographer and storyteller behind “The Doggist.” With over 11 million followers and a new book, This Dog Will Change Your Life, Friedman brings to light how dogs not only improve our lives but fundamentally help us become better humans. Together, they explore the nature of the human-dog bond; how dogs cultivate empathy, combat loneliness, and spark connections in a fragmented, accelerated world; and why the lessons we learn from dogs are more vital than ever.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Origin Story of The Doggist

• Elias Friedman shares how his lifelong love for dogs went from a childhood affection (“There’s a picture of me…being licked by my grandmother’s dog, Oreo…That was the very beginning” – Elias, 05:23) to an unexpected international project.
• Inspired by a layoff, Friedman shifted from agency work to street photography, recognizing a gap: “No one’s doing this for dogs. And it seemed like a bit of a joke at the time…but I was like, I will.” (06:04)
• Very early on, Friedman noticed that people open up about their dogs in ways they don’t about themselves or even their children: “When you ask about their dog, they just completely open up and they’ll tell you…the most candid, sometimes embarrassing story right off the bat.” (08:08)

2. Dogs as Social Catalysts & the Antidote to Loneliness

• John Miles recounts how his own dog, Bentley, helped him truly meet his neighborhood.

  “Before you get a dog, you know your neighbor, and after you get a dog, you know your neighborhood.”
  — Elias Friedman (09:16)

• Dogs naturally invite strangers into community, break down barriers, and facilitate deeper, more meaningful connections.

3. The Photographer’s Perspective

• Friedman discusses what he looks for as the Doggist: not just the visual, but moments that capture the dog’s experience of the world.
• “Every dog has its day.” (10:33) The selection of subjects is partly random but always about seizing the authentic.

4. What is a Dog — And Why Does Definition Matter?

• The book opens with cultural references to underscore how deeply dogs are woven into our stories.
• Elias: “We created dogs. Unlike cats…they are less domesticated compared to dogs. We selectively bred dogs…to be what we want them to be. There’s no such thing as a wild pug.” (12:27)
• Understanding dogs’ origins helps us respect them and fulfill our stewardship more responsibly.

5. The Joys (and Trials) of Dog Parenting

• John introduces his new puppy, Luma, rescued from a hoarding situation, demonstrating both the delight and challenges of integrating a new dog into the family (13:29–15:09).

6. “Dogs Are About Light” – On Canine Positivity

• Friedman: “They live in the present moment. They don’t dwell on the past…and they just say, like, how do I do this? Let’s do this.” (15:48)
• Dogs serve as mirrors for how we might live: without judgment, ego, or fixation on regret.

7. The Power of Eye Contact & Matter

• “Dogs are incredibly generous with their eye contact…they stare into your soul.” (17:59)
• The loss of direct, authentic connection among humans is in some ways restored by the attentive, loving gaze of a dog.

8. Dogs & Shelters: A Call for Compassionate Adoption

• The darker side of our relationship with dogs: overpopulation, abandonment, and commercial breeding.
• “I just think it’s a noble thing if you’re interested in getting a dog to at least consider getting one from a shelter.” (21:30)
• Friedman distinguishes responsible breeders with genuine love for the breed from commercial puppy mills.

9. Breeds as Human Inventions and Responsibility

• Discussion of the 16 “basal breeds,” the origins of breed diversity, and the human imprint on the dog world.
• “The hallmarks of a puppy mill…is the ability to get a dog next weekend…Those are the dogs that can end up in a shelter.” (23:27–24:14)

10. What Dog Shows Say About Us

• Shows like Westminster both preserve diversity and display the peculiarities and passions of “dog people”:

  “Each breed has its own sort of like, variety of people. Poodle people, pug people…It’s a beautiful expression of our diversity and humanity.” (27:31–28:27)

11. “Do People Look Like Their Dogs?”

• Visual and emotional resonance:

  “Whether it starts with the person looking for aspects of themselves in a dog, or the person starts to mirror their dog…we end up with dogs that are like us in some way, and we become more like each other.” (28:45–31:04)

12. The Grit of Rescue: Chrissy Beckles & the Sato Project

• True rescue work means getting dirty, facing heartbreak, and doing unglamorous labor.
• Friedman’s vivid portrait: “Her job is to lure these dogs who are maybe afraid of humans with food…getting them off of the beach and into a better life.” (31:22–34:06)

13. Dogs as Catalysts for Deeper Human Relationship

• Dogs not only introduce people, but can also deepen (or even catalyze) romantic relationships—Friedman shares stories of couples brought together by their dogs and how his own dog Elsa deepened his relationship with his now-wife.

  “Elsa made me realize who I wanted to be with and that I was capable…of having more love to give and deserve to be loved more.” (34:33–36:49)

14. Dogs as Co-regulators of Trauma and Mental Health

• Dogs’ healing power for trauma survivors, especially veterans:

  “The dog doesn’t have to ask you a question of like, ‘how are you doing?’…They’re the best listeners, and even though they don’t speak to you, they know exactly what to say.” — Elias Friedman (37:44, also 00:33)

• John Miles and Elias both highlight the staggering impact dogs can have in potentially life-or-death mental-health scenarios (41:12–42:17).

15. Celebrity Dogs (and Their Humans): Shooting with Bill Murray

• “He’s a dog lover as well…when we described what we were doing…he said, really? This is great. I love this concept.” (44:13–46:32)
• Even celebrities respond to the joy and authenticity of the Doggist’s mission to celebrate everyday canine companions.

16. Evolving the Mission – Staying True Amid Changing Technology

• Keeping up with changing algorithms and platforms:

  “If my goal is to be a canine evangelist, a voice for dogs…just keeping up with [platforms], and also have various people that I work with who make it all possible as well.” (46:58–48:35)

17. Final Takeaway: Living with Intention—From Our Dogs to Ourselves

• “Sit with them on the couch…give them some time…without your phone, and just feel what it’s like to be present with your dog.” (48:51)
• Friedman urges: Pause, be present, and let your dog sniff a little longer—honor the ordinary moments of joy and connection.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On social connection:

  “Before you get a dog, you know your neighbor, and after you get a dog, you know your neighborhood.”
  — Elias Friedman (09:16)

• On presence:

  “Dogs don’t have as thought that we do of ‘what if I fail?’...They live in the present moment. They don’t dwell on the past and what their shortcomings are.”
  — Elias Friedman (15:48)

• On seeing beyond differences:

  “Who knows if your ideologies align…The dogs don’t ask these questions. They just have a magnetism, a gravity about everything they do in attracting other people, in attracting love…”
  — Elias Friedman (19:20)

• On trauma and mental health:

  “There’s also a stigma around mental health. Not everyone’s going to raise their hand and say ‘I need help.’ So with a dog, you don’t have to raise your hand, they just show up for you.”
  — Elias Friedman (00:33 / 37:44)

• On breed responsibility:

  “The hallmarks of a puppy mill…is the ability to get a dog next weekend quickly with a credit card, without any sort of…background…Those are the dogs that can end up in a shelter.”
  — Elias Friedman (24:14)

• On relationships:

  “Elsa made me realize who I wanted to be with and that I was capable…of having more love to give and deserve to be loved more.”
  — Elias Friedman (36:49)

• On slowing down:

  “For your sake, take a pause and be present with your dog for a few minutes every day. And for your dog’s sake, let them sniff that thing a little longer.”
  — Elias Friedman (49:40)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Why Dogs? The Power of Connection – 00:33
• Elias’ Origin & The Doggist’s Spark – 05:23–08:27
• Dogs as Neighborhood Socializers – 09:16
• What Makes a Great Doggist Photo? – 09:59–11:15
• Defining ‘Dog’: Science & Story – 12:09–13:29
• Light, Positivity, Presence – 15:38–17:39
• The Healing Gaze & Empathy – 17:59–19:06
• Dog Rescue & Responsibility – 21:30–24:14, 31:22–34:06
• Dog Shows & Human Diversity – 26:08–28:27
• Do People Look Like Their Dogs? – 28:45–31:04
• Dogs in Our Relationships – 34:33–36:49
• Dogs & Mental Health / Trauma – 37:44–43:02
• Celebrity Encounters: Bill Murray – 43:06–46:32
• The Changing Tech Landscape – 46:32–48:35
• Daily Change: How to “Manner More” – 48:51

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Actionable Takeaways

1. Be Present: Dedicate distraction-free time every day just to be with your dog—no phone, no agenda, just presence.
2. Adopt Responsibly: Consider shelter adoption, and if seeking a specific breed, research for responsible breeders.
3. Let Them Sniff: Allow your dog to explore the world at their pace; it’s their way of reading their environment—and it models curiosity and patience for us.
4. Model Empathy: Emulate your dog’s unconditional acceptance and generous connection with others; empathy is mirrored, not mandated.

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Further Exploration

• This Dog Will Change Your Life—Elias Weiss Friedman’s new book; available in bookstores and online.
• Find Friedman on social media: @TheDoggist

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Closing Reflection (John Miles)

“Empathy isn’t taught, it’s mirrored. Dogs don’t care what you do, own, or achieve. They care that you show up.” (50:13)
He encourages listeners to let the smallest creatures awaken their deepest humanity and to let love—uncomplicated, nonjudgmental, and fully present—lead the way.

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Recommended for anyone seeking to reconnect with what matters, desiring more joy, empathy, and presence in daily life—whether you have a dog or not.

Transcript

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[Elias Friedman]

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[Podcast Host]

Coming up next on Passion Struck, the.

[Elias Friedman]

Dog doesn't have to ask you a question of like how are you doing? Just being in their presence. And they have an ability to listen and sense the way you're feeling. And whether it's eye contact, touch, warmth, letting you connect with them, there's just something that it has a powerful way of making you feel better and de escalating and relieving stress. They're the best listeners and even though they don't speak to you, they know exactly what to say. And there's also a stigma around mental health. Not everyone's going to raise their hand and say I need help. So with a dog, you don't have to raise your hand, they just show up for you.

[John Miles]

Welcome to Passion Struck. I'm your host, John Miles. This is the show where we explore the art of human flourishing and what it truly means to live like it matters. Each week I sit down with change makers, creators, scientists and everyday heroes to decode the human experience and uncover the tools that help us lead with meaning, heal what hurts, and pursue the fullest expression of who we're capable of becoming. Whether you're designing your future, developing as a leader, or seeking deeper alignment in your life, this show is your invitation to grow with purpose and act with intention. Because the secret to a life of deep purpose, connection and impact is choosing to live like you matter. Welcome back, friends to Passion Struck. I'm John Miles, your host and this is episode 688 of our new series, the Irreplaceables. Rediscovering Human worth in an Age of Acceleration. Whether you've been with us from the beginning or you're just joining our community of intentional change makers. Welcome. You're part of a movement to live with greater purpose and connection. If this show has ever helped you take a step toward that life, here's.

[Podcast Host]

How you can help it grow.

[John Miles]

First, share this episode with someone who needs it and then leave a five star rating or review on Apple podcasts or Spotify. It's the best way to help others discover these conversations. Last week, in case you missed it, we explored two deeply human frontiers. First with Dr. Zach Seidler, who unpacked the crisis of male loneliness and how belonging, not toughness, saves lives. Then with Dr. Zelana Momeni, who revealed how to own your attention in a.

[Podcast Host]

World that steals it.

[John Miles]

If you haven't heard those yet, they're the perfect foundation for today's conversation because today's episode explores one of the oldest and purest forms of connection we have. That's why I invited Elias Wisefree Friedman, better known as the Doggist, to join me. Elias is a world renowned street photographer and storyteller with over 11 million followers and his new book, this Dog will Change your Life is a joyful and deeply human exploration of how dogs don't just make our lives better, they make us better people. In our conversation, we explore the origins of our ancient bond with dogs, why breeds are as much a human creation as a biological one, how dogs function as factories of empathy, and why they may hold the key to curing our modern loneliness epidemic. This conversation hit home for me. My dogs Bentley and Luma have been some of my greatest teachers, helping me process trauma, build daily rituals and reawaken wonder. Before we dive in, a few quick notes. Our store start mattering.com is live. It's part of the mattering revolution built on one truth. You matter. Live like it. Every hoodie, tee and hat carries that reminder. And second, if you haven't yet joined the Ignited Life, our rapidly growing substack community visit theignitedlife.net every week. I share behind the scenes reflections, workbooks, science backed frameworks and and practices to help you live more intentionally and connected. Now let's dive into this heart opening conversation with Elias Wise Friedman, the Doggist. Thank you for choosing Passion Struck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now let that journey begin.

[Podcast Host]

I am absolutely thrilled today to welcome Elias Friedman to Passion Stock. Welcome Elias. How are you?

[Elias Friedman]

I'm great. How are you doing?

[Podcast Host]

I am doing fantastic and I've been so excited about this interview because I absolutely love dogs and for those who are tuning in, you are the Doggist. So I thought I would start there. You have grown this Doggist brand on the Internet to now over 11 million founders. How did this journey begin for you?

[Elias Friedman]

My origin story I think would have to date back to when I was a kid. There's a picture of me in 1988 being licked by my grandmother's dog, Oreo, like, on the face. And you can see a big smile on my face. So probably that was the very beginning of me really loving dogs. And since then, I developed love for photography, but didn't know exactly what to do with my creative spirit. And coming from the family of two physicians, the first thought was, oh, maybe I'll be a doctor. But I moved to New York City, was working in brand strategy and agency, was part of a layoff, and decided to dust off my camera and was inspired by humans of New York and the Sartorialists, those street photography blogs, and said, well, no one's doing this for dogs. And it seemed like a bit of a joke at the time because it's like, well, who's going to take dog photography so seriously? But I was like, I will. And so, long story short, the rest is history. Eleven years later, 50,000 dogs photographed. I'm not. I'm in retrospect, I'm not surprised. People love the project, but at the time, it was a little bit wild.

[Podcast Host]

I have to ask, do you remember the first dog you maybe photographed where you thought, this is so much bigger than a hobby? It's really my life's calling?

[Elias Friedman]

Well, I think before I started the Doggist, I was like, I don't know, like an unveiled artist. I knew that I love dogs, but I wasn't ready to create a whole project around it. But I was encouraged by other friends in the tech space in New York City and these sort of like, aha moments, like the name the Doggist. It's like someone who dogs. And I remember photographing a Frenchie in Williamsburg, and he said, what's this for? And I said, the Doggus. And so maybe that was one of the first moments. The first picture posted to the Doggist was a boxer I met in Vienna. It was the basis of the Doggist logo. But, yeah, I think someone. This project is like every. Everyone's a dog photographer. This is something that the world needs, right? Especially in these times of divisiveness and stress and shocking things that happen. Dogs are the antidote to that. So I felt like we needed this project. I missed having a dog. And dogs are one of the few things people want to talk about their dogs. If I'm stopping people on the street, like, I don't want to talk about myself or I don't want to talk about my kids. Those are two.

[Podcast Host]

They're different.

[Elias Friedman]

But when you ask about their dog, they just completely open up and they'll tell you like the most candid, sometimes embarrassing story right off the bat. And that's like a refreshing thing in today's world to just have someone, like, completely relax and just tell you an honest, authentic story.

[Podcast Host]

It does mean so much. And I'm wearing a shirt today that says I matter. And I think more and more of us just stay in our houses these days or our offices, and we're not getting out and we're not connecting. So my whole message with this podcast is that you matter. And we just moved into a new neighborhood and we were walking the dog that we've had for a while, Bentley. We immediately encountered other people walking dogs and other neighbors. And so it really is a nice extension to your life because without Bentley, I wouldn't have met these 15 to 20 new neighbors throughout the neighborhood, might have met my next door neighbors, but certainly wouldn't have had more invested conversations with other neighbors who we pass along the way.

[Elias Friedman]

They're like a force of socialization. The thing I've been saying recently is before you get a dog, you know your neighbor, and after you get a dog, you know your neighborhood. Dogs are amazing social butterflies, right? They want to meet everyone, they want to sniff butts, and they have to pee three times a day or more. And if you have to take them for a walk, then they will introduce you to everyone that you come across. And sometimes those connections are very meaningful.

[Podcast Host]

Well, dogs seem to be everywhere in our lives like we were just talking about, but you seem to see them differently than most of us do. What do you look for when you raise the lens?

[Elias Friedman]

That's a good question. I think I'm looking for something that stands out. I will always be a photographer, so I'm looking for something with visual interest, whether it's a rare breed of dog, a unique looking dog, someone's crazy outfit. Maybe the light is just right. Maybe it's like a scene. The dog's in a bag, dog's in a stroller, people are having brunch and the dog is by the table. Something that represents something about life. And I'm, of course, I'm always interested in conveying it through the dog's perspective. So I'm always getting down to the dog's level, focusing on the dog, but always I'm interested in showing the context through which they're living their life. Yeah, people obviously who want to be have their dog on the Doggist. That's like one of their questions is like, how do you choose your subjects? And it is a bit random because I will shoot Once or twice a week, and we'll gather. I'll meet seven to 10 dogs on each outing, but it's a little bit of a fit. I don't know. Fate or. I say every dog has its day.

[Podcast Host]

Today we are talking about your brand new book, this dog will change your life. And you're already a New York Times bestselling author, so it shows you how much these stories resonate on. Passion struck the show. We tend to balance science and story, and your book opens up with both. Why did you go into Levi Strauss and Groucho?

[Elias Friedman]

I think they're hilarious examples of, like, how we represent dogs in our culture. What was the Groucho quote? It's inside of a dog. You can't. What was it? You can't read. I forget. Exactly. But, yeah, I just felt like they were good, representative examples of how dogs are pervasive throughout our culture and part of the fabric of our society. They absolutely are.

[Podcast Host]

And I thought it was interesting that you could have jumped directly into street stories and about the things that you do when you're out there photographing these dogs. But instead, you start with the question, what is a dog?

[John Miles]

Why define it first?

[Elias Friedman]

Well, I think a lot of people think of their dog as a family member, as a best friend. And those things are true, but they are animals, just like we are. And so understanding where they come from, how they evolved, how they came to be, we created dogs. Unlike other types of pets, cats, turtles, they are less domesticated compared to dogs. We selectively bred dogs over hundreds, thousands of years to be what we want them to be. I like to think of this idea of a wild pug. There's no such thing as a wild pug. And so each of these dogs are a representation of us in all their forms. Big little lap dogs, Great Danes. And so understanding the origin of dogs, I think is important to fully understanding them.

[Podcast Host]

I had to jump away for a second because this little one is our new addition. Her name is Luma, for those who are watching. And she is five months old, but she's only 10 days new to us. And I have trained my lab over the years to. When I'm filming, he goes into another room, sits in his bed, knows what I'm doing, and doesn't say a peep. She is very distractible right now. So she is making it harder to do these interviews until I train her more.

[Elias Friedman]

But yeah. So this is Luma.

[Podcast Host]

This is Luma.

[Elias Friedman]

And what's her backstory? She's like a Chihuahua mixer.

[Podcast Host]

She's a Chihuahua terrier mix.

[Elias Friedman]

Cute. And what's her backstory? Is she from a certain part of the country or.

[Podcast Host]

Her backstory is, my wife's dog, Gibbs, passed away in January, and she lived long life, 16 years. And we were looking for a new addition to the family. Keep Bentley more alive and alert as.

[John Miles]

He gets older along with us.

[Podcast Host]

So we were struggling to find a new dog, and my wife learned about this group that was having a big event because they found a person who was hoarding dogs, and they had over 40 different dogs on their property, and she happened to be one of two or three litters that they discovered on the property. And when we went to the event, she came right up to all of us, and we just couldn't get her out of her mind. Luckily, we were able to get her, and the rest is history.

[Elias Friedman]

Yeah, she crawled into your heart and wouldn't leave. That's how it can happen.

[Podcast Host]

But, man, it's been a long time since I've had a puppy, so it's a little bit getting used to training them again.

[Elias Friedman]

Of course, it's a fun phase. I rescued my dog Elsa, when she was basically an adult or about 1 years old. So I didn't get to do the puppy phase with Elsa. And part of me wishes I could have, but also, I know puppies are a lot of work.

[Podcast Host]

That is true. So we're still trying to potty train her worse.

[John Miles]

Well, one of the things you write.

[Podcast Host]

About in the book is you say that dogs are almost all about light, and that really struck me. What does that mean to you?

[Elias Friedman]

I think dogs have an innate positivity about them. I spoke with someone recently who has who takes care of a dog whose hind legs don't work and has wheels to get around. And she said that dogs don't have as thought that we do of what if I fail? Dogs, they just look towards the future. They live in the present moment. They don't dwell on the past and what their shortcomings are. And they just say, like, how do I do this? Let's do this. Even if it's just getting a treat from across the room, they're not thinking, oh, woe is me. My phone leaves. I were xyz. If only I were different. They just focus on the now. And so I think through that virtue and being around dogs, they live as this light, as you're saying, this source of motivation, of encouragement. Dogs aren't judgmental of themselves. They're not judgmental of others. They don't care about what you look like. What kind of car you drive. They lead with trust. They don't lead with doubt. And so as humans, people with. We have an ego we have to struggle with, and we are often at odds with one another. And for whatever reason, those things exist, I think they don't always serve us. And by being around dogs, by seeing the way that they behave, even without spoken language, we become more like them. And I think that is a good thing.

[Podcast Host]

I completely agree with you. I know one of the things with Bentley, when he looks at me sometimes I feel like he's peering into my soul. And it's crazy how much you can just feel how much they love you, how much they care for you, which is something you often don't get from the human experience.

[Elias Friedman]

Yeah. And when you say peering into your soul, it's like a lot of it comes down to direct eye contact. Like, throughout your average day, you can probably. Even with the people closest to you, the amount of, like, direct eye contact you have gets less and less every day. You have five seconds with the barista, you have 30 seconds with your wife. Whereas dogs are incredibly generous with their eye contact. You come home, they stare into your soul like you're saying. And I think as humans, we crave that, and we're missing that more and more. The ability as we work remotely, as we're on a podcast over a zoom channel. And this counts for something, but it's not quite the same as being in the same. Be right next to someone and some. A dog. The way a dog looks at you is just. We don't get that much anymore. And so it's important they remind us that we matter, like your shirt says. And that feeling of love that we get through eye contact is priceless.

[Podcast Host]

It reminds me of something that you wrote about in the book. You suggest that there's no dogs without humans, but I. I think it's maybe no humanity without dogs. I do think they bring out the best in humans.

[Elias Friedman]

And, yeah, just like when you walk around the street with your dog, you're talking about meeting new people. You probably wouldn't have met them otherwise. Who knows if your ideologies align, like, whether you would have struck up a conversation with this person otherwise. The dogs don't ask these questions. They just have a magnetism, a gravity about everything they do. In attracting other people, in attracting love connection. I think we take it for granted. It's something that we've gotten used to living with a dog. But my goal with this book, and really the whole dog, is project everything. I'm doing is to deepen our appreciation for dogs and help them live better lives and hopefully save a number, as many as possible from living life in a shelter.

[John Miles]

I hope you're enjoying my conversation with Elias Friedman.

[Podcast Host]

We'll be right back after a short break.

[John Miles]

Thank you for supporting those who support the show. You're listening to Passion Struck on the Passion Struck Network. Now back to my conversation with Elias Fridman.

[Podcast Host]

That's why we always tend to rescue our dogs. My, my other dog Bentley came from Alabama originally and he had a sister and that sister was really mean to him in many ways. But the parents, for whatever reason before I had them moved to a place not sure why people do this where they wouldn't allow them to have big dogs like a lab. And so they gave them to a shelter which became a kill shelter. And so we were able to to find Bentley from a lab rescue organization and a and a great foster mom. But it does really sometimes make me think as much love as dogs bring to you how sometimes we treat them in the exact opposite way that they show the love to us that so many of us feel who love them.

[Elias Friedman]

Yeah, it's a dark part of reality and being a human is abandoning things that we once cared about. Or I remember being in Texas, arriving at their municipal shelter, a city shelter, and I got there at 9am and there's already a line of people waiting to relinquish their dogs, to surrender them for whatever reason. And of course your instinct is to judge them and I guess you can. But people may be struggling financially health wise. It's just an unfortunate thing. And in places where there's overpopulation around the country, especially in the south, unfortunately have to do face based euthanasia, which is unfortunate. And a lot of it has to do with overbreeding. And we don't have to get into all the details of that. But I just think it's a noble thing if you're interested in getting a dog to at least consider getting one from a shelter. Because dogs aren't meant to languish in small cages and the not social they belong with their people in a family. Even going to a shelter and just seeing it for yourself I think is a meaningful thing to do. As someone who loves dogs, it is.

[Podcast Host]

So sad to go to those facilities where they're trying to breed purebreds and you see the dogs in all the cages and they just look miserable. And this is something that you bring up in the book 16 basal breeds and you call breeds human inventions. Why is this important to. For the listeners to understand about this breeding and making sense of modern dogs and what comes about with the responsibilities we have of breeding these human inventions.

[Elias Friedman]

I think to make a distinction, not the practice of breeding a responsibly breeding a dog that you care about, for example, like dog shows, for example, there is a best practice. And these people are not responsible for the overpopulation in shelters. They're not making money out of this. They're barely breaking even. They are breeding a breed they love to keep it alive, a legacy, whether it's a hunting dog, a. The very 100 to 200 purebred breeds out there are interesting and I think worth preserving. It's a fascinating thing. The issue comes when you have someone who's trying to make money off of a trend of a breed's popularity, like a celebrity gets a dog and then everyone wants one of those. It's just impulsive, fashiony phenomenon. And the hallmarks of a puppy mill, if you will, is the ability to get a dog next weekend quickly with a credit card, without any sort of the breeder looking into your background or interviewing you at all and without any accountability, as if the breeder is not keeping up with you. Those are the dogs that can end up in a shelter. And so I just want to make that distinction off the bat is that if you decide that you really want a specific breed, it. You need to make sure to do a lot of research and find a breeder that is doing it with love and a care for preserving their breed, not to make money. And it should take a year, it should take at least six months for you to get a dog, if that's the path you want to go down. But yeah, in terms of the Basil breed, so there's. I don't know how many were there, 16 or 11?

[Podcast Host]

16, yeah.

[Elias Friedman]

16. Yeah. So there's basically the first dogs that were. That we created the first breeds. And it's like the chow, is it the Shiba Inu. A lot of them were Asian, started in Asia, Canaan dog in, I guess, Africa. And that's just what all of our dogs today have a bit of in them. If you do any of these DNA tests, you'll see there's always a sliver of chow in every dog. And so it's just interesting history lesson. If you look at the breed that they all started with a select few.

[Podcast Host]

Well, one of the things that you just mentioned was dog shows and you've been shooting Westminster, as I understand it, for a decade. What do you think Dog shows reveal about us, not just the dogs.

[Elias Friedman]

I think they're the variety of types of dogs they are in the most. These are called confirmation shows, as meaning that the dogs. There's a very specific description of what each breed should be, quote, should be. And so the dogs that conform to that the most are. Should be the ones that win. So you have bloodhounds, you have Irish setters, you have Newfoundlands, you have poodles, pugs, shih Tzus, bijons. The list goes on and on. And so each of the. What they call them fanciers, dog fanciers, have chosen a breed that they love and have dedicated their life to showing them in this elite level Westminster Dog Show, Crufts in England and the National Dog show in Pennsylvania, to try and preserve their breed and to create the epitome of what these breed standards are.

[Podcast Host]

And.

[Elias Friedman]

And a lot of them will also. A lot of the corgis that show up are actually working dogs. They're right off the farm chasing cattle one day and then walking around a show ring the next. And so it's a very niche, kind of the whole thing is a bit wild. Like, for anyone who's seen the movie Best in Show, I remember asking one of the handlers and mentioned that to him, and he was like, oh, the documentary. And I said, no, that's like a mockumentary. So now that's a documentary. Like the. The sort of stereotypes that are portrayed in there have some truth to them. There's. Each breed has its own sort of like, variety of people. Poodle people, pug people, shizu people. It's. It's just like a. Interesting expression of our diversity and humanity. And the dogs there are a representation of that.

[Podcast Host]

Yeah. Well, speaking of people and their dogs, I want to talk about doppelgangers. There is so much truth that you walk around and it does seem oftentimes like people look like they're dogs. What do you think that says about identity or belonging?

[Elias Friedman]

I think there we want to express a love towards our dogs. And doing that in a visual way is one way of doing that. I often think some people obviously will choose a breed with an aesthetic, meet a dog that matches their aesthetic, whether it's maybe their hair or the way they think of themselves, or interesting markings on them. And so it can often start with a dog, but then sometimes it starts with a dog, then the person starts to dressed like the dog. So it's funny. Like, Elsa is like all white with a little caramel toasting on the top, and so when my wife Sam, comes out, she's dressed in all white. I was like, oh, this is awkward. Like, you guys are both wearing the same thing. So I think it can go both ways. Whether it starts with the person looking for aspects of themselves in a dog, or the person starts to mirror their dog. And I think it's great. Like, why not? When I'm walking around and I see that, like, juxtaposition of a person that matches their dog, it's, like, fascinating, and I think it's a beautiful expression.

[Podcast Host]

Yeah. I have to say, when people meet Bentley, who I've been walking around for a lot longer now, I'm never sure if they're reading the dogs or me. And it's a funny thing, because I think Bentley does pick up a lot of my personality. I. I think he's introspective, but. But really caring. He gets along with everyone, humans and dogs. Nothing seems to faze him. And it is so interesting how our dogs do resemble us. Not sure yet who Luma represents, and I'm sure her personality will evolve over the next two to three months.

[Elias Friedman]

Well, I like to think that everyone finds their dog, whether it's cosmic forces or luck. We end up with dogs that are like us in some way, and we become more like each other. Your dog sees your behavior, your energy, you see your dog's energy, and you end up evolving in some way to the next version of yourself. And mostly, I think, in a very positive way.

[Podcast Host]

Absolutely. I did want to go back to the rescues for a second, because one of the things that you wrote about was Chrissy Beckles and the Sato Project, and I wanted to highlight that. What does her grit teach us about what real rescue requires?

[Elias Friedman]

I think a lot of people view rescue or volunteering for rescue as like, holding puppies or getting to foster a puppy. But the reality is that you gotta get your hands dirty. Like, I remember Chrissy was doing a transport at an airport. Dogs were coming off of a plane, and someone asked, like, how can I help? I really want to help out for the next transport. And she says, oh, well, you can start by cleaning the crap out of these cages, like, puppy poop. And the look on her face was, like, you could see that was not what the answer she was expecting. And so the grit you're talking about is getting your hands dirty. None of the actual dog rescue is glamorous. The reality is that in my trip down to Puerto Rico, spending time with Chrissy, we got into a Jeep, we go to a beach that is unfortunately nicknamed Dead dog beach because it's the place people go in shame to drop their dogs off and drive back home and try and forget about them. We go to this beach and there's dogs living in a bush, often emaciated, covered in ticks and other maladies, other illnesses they might have mange. And her job is to, and mind you, Chrissy is like allergic to dogs of course. And her job is to lure these dogs who are maybe afraid of humans with food. She basically puts food out and to try and get these puppies off of the beach and into a better life. And so not everyone can do that. And that's not how people by the time the dog is transported to New York City and is on a, is in a adoption van in Columbus Circle and is then adopted by well off family and it's going to live a nice life and it's brownstone in Brooklyn that is the goal. But it didn't start that way. It's not the way these dogs life started. And so just having an appreciation for all the work it takes to rescue these dogs often from the brink of death. A lot of these dogs literally. And I've seen the worst of it and the unfortunate reality of having to dogs not make it. And so someone's got to do this work. And it's almost always these like badass women often who have tattoos. And Chrissy's a boxer. That was the first time I met her, was seeing her box in a ring. There's just something like you need like you're saying there's this grit about them.

[Podcast Host]

Well, I want to talk a little bit about relationships and in the book you write, a dog can bring people into contact, it can bring people into conversation. But a dog can also bring people together. And when you say that you mean together into sustained romantic relationships. Can you maybe share a story from your time out as the Doggist where you've encountered couples who met because of their dogs or through their dogs?

[Elias Friedman]

I think, I'm not sure if there's like some. The Hollywood version of oh well, my dog's leash got entwined with your dog's leash. And that's I think the times I'm thinking of or when I like help people get engaged. For example, like I remember this guy reached out and said I'm going to propose to my girlfriend and she's such a fan of the Doggist. And I don't know if the dog's name was, I don't know, let's say Miles. We love this our dog so much. And I want him to help. Could you photograph Miles? And we're going to have a sign on his neck saying, will you marry my roommate? Will you marry me? And so helping this guy posting on the dog, I said a specific time. And then her seeing it and saying, yes, people love these stories because people love romance and love, but it's just the fact that dogs can help with that and are so entwined in our lives and it makes that moment so meaningful. And it's. Of course, it's like when I proposed to my wife, Sam. I, Elsa, had to be there. My dog, it was on a beach in Malibu and Elsa was running around. And I wouldn't have it any other way. Dogs are part of our story and we're lucky enough to find our human person, then our dog is just. We have to give them a lot of credit because they activate our hearts and they open another chamber of our heart which we may not have known is there. And so I would say that's true about my life is after I got Elsa, that was when Sam and I, Elsa basically catalyzed our relationship. We had known each other for a bit and dated a little. But Elsa made me realize who I wanted to be with and that I was capable and capable of having more love to give and deserve to be loved more.

[Podcast Host]

Well, you and Sam actually met in high school, if I have, correct?

[Elias Friedman]

Yes, that's correct. Yeah. She was one of my sister's good friends.

[Podcast Host]

Yeah. Interesting how life brings people who were supposed to be back into our lives like that. And so interesting that Elsa had a big part in that story.

[Elias Friedman]

It's not, I guess, uncommon for you to end up with someone that you have known for a while or grew up with. But of course I feel like the dog aspect, Elsa, if it weren't for her, then I don't think we would be together necessarily. Who knows?

[Podcast Host]

So I wanted to talk about another area. One of the biggest things that Bentley has helped me with, and he is a service dog, is he's helped me regulate my experience with trauma. I know for a lot of veterans who have dogs and other people who've experienced trauma, dogs can be a huge influence in helping you regulate PTSD and other things that have happened. What patterns do you see in dogs as potentially co regulators and helping people who experience anxiety or mental health issues?

[Elias Friedman]

Yeah, I think this is like a fascinating aspect of. I've done a lot of series with working service dog organizations for veterans with ptsd, various types of ptsd. And it's just incredible. The power that these dogs have that no other medication therapy can really match. And this is something that I've been trying to understand. Even yesterday, I was at a Temple University hospital with an organization called Crisis Response Canines. And they basically go into settings where a disaster, a tragedy has happened, there's a shooting, natural disaster. And so this was a hospital where they are going to visit nurses who are experience something traumatic ten times a day because they're in an emergency room. And there's just this unique ability for them to interact with a dog. And the dog doesn't have to ask you a question of like, how are you doing? Just being in their presence. And they have an ability to listen and sense the way you're feeling. And whether it's eye contact, touch, warmth, letting you connect with them, there's just something that has a powerful way of making you feel better and de. Escalating and relieving stress. They're the best listeners, and even though they don't speak to you, they know exactly what to say. And there's also a stigma around mental health. Not everyone's going to raise their hand and say, I need help. So with a dog, you don't have to raise your hand. They just show up for you. And whether you are aware of the fact that you are feeling down or feeling like the trauma is having a grip on you, you. You fe. The dogs just make you feel better. And yeah, it's a unique thing. That's something that I think about a lot. There's this. I met with a veteran a couple years ago. It was in Marine Corps. And he was talking about how his dog. He said he wouldn't be around here if it wouldn't be around if it weren't for his dog. And I had heard that before. I wasn't sure if what he really meant. And he was talking about how how many more veterans commit suicide every day and how many more of them would still be around if they'd had dogs. And that's like a statistic that's theoretical that I remember leaving towards the end of my time that day, speaking with his wife and just asking her, like, has he ever talked to you about any of his experiences serving? And she said, no, he's never talked to me about anything. I knew nothing about his experience. And that just was like. Shows you that dogs. His dog was there for him and his dog listens. His dog is the one that hears his stories and saved his life, literally. Because dogs can be there for in ways that people can't, even if you want them to be. He felt like he didn't want to burden his wife with things that he suffers with. And so, like, how do you quantify that?

[Podcast Host]

That's a really important topic. A couple years ago, I had a Naval Academy classmate of mine, Chuck Smith, on the show. And Chuck did this TED talk that went viral about tveteran suicide. And if you know anything about the TED organization before you come on to speak, they do a ton of validation work, making sure that whatever you're going to put on the stage is accurate.

[Elias Friedman]

And I did it.

[Podcast Host]

Yeah. When you think about the war on terror, the war itself resulted in somewhere around 5,000 fatalities. But when you look at the suicides during that same period of veterans who took their lives outside of conflict, the numbers are staggering. It's like 145,000, if you just.

[Elias Friedman]

Take.

[Podcast Host]

That example you just gave. How many of those lives could have been saved if they might have had a dog companion in their life, who gave them the vehicle of comfort that they couldn't find elsewhere? So I just bring that up because I think it's important.

[Elias Friedman]

Yeah, yeah. And a lot of veterans think that they don't deserve one or someone else deserves it more than them. That's just built into the mentality of serving and being an officer. And you, you think that your job is to help others. I don't need help. But people are human. They're not robots. Right. And it's hard to go back to a civilian life and live the rest of your life out after seeing so much and experiencing these traumas. And part of the work I. Part of what I want to encourage in showing these stories is to hopefully help some people who are struggling to feel comfortable and like they deserve to have a dog.

[Podcast Host]

I want to bring this back to something lighter for a moment.

[Elias Friedman]

Yes.

[Podcast Host]

You have interviewed, or I shouldn't say interviewed, you've done photographs with thousands of strangers, but also some well recognized people like Naomi Watts and Chris Rock. But I wanted to focus in on one in particular. My Aunt Pat grew up with Bill Murray. She went to elementary school with them starting in kindergarten. And in fact, he sometimes comes back to his grade school reunions, believe it or not.

[Elias Friedman]

Of course. Very Bill Murray.

[Podcast Host]

One time she was an attorney during her career, and one time she left the office and she was walking down the street and you can imagine you're in Chicago when all of a sudden someone grabbed you from behind and starts twirling you around. Well, it happened to be Bill Murray, which she hadn't seen in over a decade. At that point. But I have a friend who lives in Charleston who tells me Bill shows up unexpectedly at different events from time to time. What was it like shooting with Bill? Do you remember anything from it?

[Elias Friedman]

I mean, yeah, it was unreal. I grew up watching Caddyshack. I was starstruck myself. And he's the ultimate character. Everything you say, he's, like, cracking, like the perfect joke. And he's a dog lover as well. No surprise. He's had dogs over the years. And he had been doing this press junket for the movie Friends all day. He was doing interviews. And so he's probably a bit tough, tired. But I remember he came out and we had about 20 minutes to shoot this. He was going to help me find dogs on the street. And I could just see when we described what we were doing, you're going to help us find dogs. He's like, really? This is great. I love this concept. And so he lit up and Naomi lit up, and every dog that we met, you could see his curiosity and his excitement peak. And that was awesome to see someone who has had so much experience doing all types of things. An incredible life he's led, to see him have this childlike curiosity. And I was so glad that I could show him what it's like to be the Doggist, to live my life. And through the rest of the week, he would was going on interview shows. He was on Howard Stern talking about his movie, promoting that. But he kept bringing up the dog. He kept bringing up the Doggist. He's to Howard, have you heard of the Doggist? And he's like, no, I am. And he said, oh, it's this guy who walks around with cameras and he says, may take a photo of your dog. And so even this 20 minute, half an hour experience stuck with him. And that is really a testament to ultimately the power of dogs to. To change our lives, to make us appreciate everyone more. You can watch this video. It's still pinned to my Instagram. But just hearing the way people talk about their dogs, you could tell Bill sensed that this was something meaningful and it moved him. And that is my goal in general. Not just to move people who are like Bill Murray and extremely famous, but everyone who loves dogs and wants to feel more connected to them.

[Podcast Host]

I'm glad you shared that, because as we mentioned at the beginning, you've built a 11 million person community. And when I think about that's reach and responsibility, and I'm sure Bill Murray on that show helped increase that reach. But platforms keep shifting, technology Keeps shifting. How do you adapt without losing the core mission and what's at the heart of it, which you just described?

[Elias Friedman]

I think I consider myself to be an artist. I started as a photographer, slowly evolved into through writing about dogs in short form to now being an author and having published my first written narrative book. And every day on the various platforms, Instagram, TikTok, you have to evolve your art and so it's become much more video based. You're competing to get. The algorithm decides how much, how much of your audience gets to see your work at this point. So there's a lot of forces at play and it's part of the challenge to keep up with it. Instead of complaining about it or being stagnant, you have to just keep changing and realizing that these tools can help spread your message even more. And so if my goal is to be a canine evangelist, a voice for dogs, to help people deepen their appreciation for not just their dogs, but dogs in general. Just keeping up with, if my platforms are social media and of course books and just being out in person doing my best to keep up with it and also have various people that I work with who make it all possible as well. If I'm the captain of a ship, you know it needs support.

[Podcast Host]

Elias, I have one final question for you. Passion Struck is about mattering and intentional living and dogs model both. If every listener today changed one behavior with their dog, what should it be?

[Elias Friedman]

I think from your perspective, it would be to sit with them on the couch and give them some time, dedicated time without your phone, and just feel what it's like to be present with your dog. Because that's how they experience life, is in the present moment. And for your dog's sake, when you're out on your next walk, let them sniff a little longer. That's something that they find interesting. The way I think of it is if you pull your dog away from a good scent, it's like taking a good book out of their hands. This is the way the dogs experience the world, through scents. For your sake, take a pause and be present with your dog for a few minutes every day. And for your dog's sake, let them sniff that thing a little longer.

[Podcast Host]

And Elias, people want to learn more about you. Where's the best place for them to do and the book and your social presence?

[Elias Friedman]

Well, the book is this dog will change your life. It's available online and every local bookstore, hopefully at least a few copies and online on social media at TheDoggus. That's the D O G I s t yeah, that's where to find me.

[Podcast Host]

Well, Elias, thank you so much for joining us. I love to talk about dogs, so this was a real pleasure for me.

[Elias Friedman]

Likewise. You're a dog guy, so you get it.

[John Miles]

That's a wrap on today's conversation with Elias Friedman. What I love about this dialogue is that it reminds us that empathy isn't taught, it's mirrored. Dogs don't care what you do, own or achieve. They care that you show up. So here are three takeaways to carry forward with you this week. The smallest creature can awaken the deepest humanity. Second, connection begins when we slow down enough to notice. And love in its purest form asks for nothing but presence. If this episode moved, you help us keep growing the movement. Leave a five star rating and review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps new listeners find the show, share it with someone who loves a dog or needs a reminder to reconnect with what matters most. And subscribe to our YouTube channel for full video episodes, highlights and exclusive behind the scene moments. You can also find extended reflections and key takeaways@the ignitedlife.net Our community hub built to help you live a life with more intention and meaning. Next week we continue our series the Irreplaceables with Amina Altai, a powerhouse executive coach, helping high performers redefine success around wholeness and authenticity.

[Amina Altai]

Last year, as I was finishing up the book, I was working seven days a week and now that I had a big burst of energy on the book tour that finished, have a bit of a slowdown period. So I've been working like three days a week for this. And that, to me, feels right. I'm recouping my energy. I talk about how ambition goes in cycles. You have these peaks in the sun and then you have these moments where you go back underground to recuperate. And I'm in an underground moment. And. And last year when I was working seven days a week, nobody asked, are you okay? This year when I'm working three days a week, people are like, are you okay?

[Elias Friedman]

Yeah, I'm great.

[Amina Altai]

But we're so indoctrinated to believe that going 90 miles an hour all the time is the way that when somebody slows down to take care of themselves, we think that's the problem. And so it's just so insidious and it's so pervasive that I feel like we have to question everything. I think the biggest lie is that the more you work, the more valuable you are.

[John Miles]

Until then, be where your feet are lead with empathy and as always, live life passion struck.