Summary

In this episode, Andy talks with Amy Leneker, leadership coach, joy strategist, and author of Cheers to Monday. Amy's journey began with a burnout so severe that her doctor put her on medical leave. It took 10 words on a medical form to change everything: "What are your hobbies? What do you do for fun?" She couldn't answer it. That moment sent her on a mission to help leaders recognize stress earlier and respond to it far more intentionally.

In this conversation, Amy shares the stress stories many leaders carry without ever questioning them, and why those stories get quietly rewarded in so many organizations. You'll hear how the body whispers warnings long before burnout hits, why most common stress-relief advice actually makes things worse, and how Amy's three-step Un-Stressing Method gives leaders a clear, practical framework to move forward. She also shares a powerful real-world example of a team carrying 73 stressors that simply didn't need to be there—and what happened when they finally saw that.

If you're looking for a practical, empowering guide to break the cycle of stress and overwhelm in leadership, this episode is for you!

Sound Bites

"The story that I inherited, either intentionally or unintentionally, was you just work hard because that's the only choice you have."
"I think one of the biggest mistakes that I made was not recognizing how much choice I had."
"I couldn't remember the last time that I had real fun."
"Those unhealthy stress stories are rewarded."
"The majority of ways that we try to manage stress at work actually increase our stress."
"When I ignored the whispers, it got to the point where ignoring it was no longer an option.... If you ignore them long enough, then the body's going to scream."
"Talking about stress is stressful, but we've got to be able to see it if we're going to be able to do anything about it."
"Unclear expectations are resentments waiting to happen."
"People pleasing—it's not a healthy dynamic. It's not something that serves you or the people around you."
"Stress is contagious. There is no question about it."
"Yes, stress is wildly contagious, but so is joy."

Chapters

00:00 Introduction
01:39 Start of Interview
01:52 Early Messages About Work and Stress
04:36 The 10 Words That Changed Everything
06:39 Postponing Joy
07:30 Stress Stories Leaders Believe
08:19 How the Body Signals Burnout Before the Brain Does
11:44 What's Broken About Typical Stress Advice
12:58 Walking Through the Un-Stressing Method
15:03 Why Sequence Matters: See, Sort, Solve
17:32 Solving Stress vs. Fixing It
18:44 The Un-Stressing Method in Action: A Team Story
21:58 The Danger of Unstated Priorities
22:42 People Pleasing as a Warning Sign
23:38 Breaking the Cycle of Stress as a Parent
24:41 End of Interview
25:11 Andy Comments After the Interview
28:16 Outtakes

Learn More

You can learn more about Amy and her work at AmyLeneker.com.

For more learning on this topic, check out:

Episode 448 with Marie-Helene Pelletier. It's a book on how to develop resilience when demands are piling up. It's a great follow-up to today's discussion.
Episode 398 with Dr. Neha Sangwan, which is a book about learning to recognize wake up calls to help us avoid burnout.
Episode 164 with stress researcher Derek Roger. Derek brings a unique perspective to the discussion about stress.

Chat with PMeLa

You can chat directly with PMeLa—the podcast's AI persona—to get episode recommendations and answers to your project management and leadership questions. Visit PeopleAndProjectsPodcast.com/PMeLa to chat with her.

Pass the PMP Exam

If you or someone you know is thinking about getting PMP certified, we've put together a helpful guide called The 5 Best Resources to Help You Pass the PMP Exam on Your First Try. We've helped thousands of people earn their certification, and we'd love to help you too. It's totally free, and it's a great way to get a head start.

Just go to 5BestResources.PeopleAndProjectsPodcast.com to grab your copy. I'd love to help you get your PMP this year!

Join Us for LEAD52

I know you want to be a more confident leader–that's why you listen to this podcast. LEAD52 is a global community of people like you who are committed to transforming their ability to lead and deliver. It's 52 weeks of leadership learning, delivered right to your inbox, taking less than 5 minutes a week. And it's all for free. Learn more and sign up at GetLEAD52.com. Thanks!

Thank you for joining me for this episode of The People and Projects Podcast!

Talent Triangle: Power Skills

Topics: Stress Management, Leadership, Burnout Prevention, Wellbeing, Resilience, Team Culture, People Pleasing, Priority Setting, Workplace Conflict, Joy, Self-Awareness, Communication

The following music was used for this episode:

Music: Tropical Vibe by WinnieTheMoog License (CC BY 4.0): https://filmmusic.io/standard-license

Music: Summer Morning Full Version by MusicLFiles License (CC BY 4.0): https://filmmusic.io/standard-license