Rob Reiner’s death and legacy

Summary

Post Reports: Rob Reiner’s Death and Legacy

The Washington Post | December 16, 2025
Host: Colby Ekowitz
Guest: Sonia Rao (Washington Post features reporter)

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Overview

This episode of Post Reports addressed the shocking deaths of famed director Rob Reiner and his wife, Michelle Singer Reiner, found murdered in their Los Angeles home. The discussion explores the circumstances of their deaths, the turbulent family dynamics that preceded the tragedy, Rob Reiner’s monumental legacy in film and politics, and the intense, controversial reaction from President Donald Trump. The episode reflects on Reiner’s enduring influence both on screen and as a public figure, and considers the broader social and political impact of his and his wife’s work.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Breaking News: The Deaths and Investigation

• Discovery and Initial Details
  • Rob Reiner, 78, and Michelle Singer Reiner, 70, were found dead Saturday afternoon in their Brentwood home. (00:02–01:57)
  • Their son, Nick Reiner (32), was arrested on suspicion of their murder.
• Nature of the Case
  • Police are investigating the deaths as homicides. (01:57)
  • Uncertainty remains about the exact time and circumstances; speculation initially surrounded a family member, confirmed as Nick by LAPD. (02:21)
  • Nick’s history of substance abuse and familial strain was public knowledge. (02:21–02:43)

2. Family Turmoil and Motive

• Nick Reiner’s Relationship with Parents

  • Their relationship was publicly tumultuous, marked by Nick’s struggle with addiction and multiple stints in rehab. (03:10)
  • The Reiners collaborated on "Being Charlie," a film co-written by Nick about his experiences with addiction. This project reflected attempts to heal and understand one another. (03:08–04:51)

• Insightful Film Dialogue

  • Rob Reiner frequently referenced a line from “Being Charlie” expressing regret for not prioritizing his son’s perspective over external expert advice, highlighting the deep complexities of parenting through addiction.
    • Quote (Paraphrased by Sonia Rao, 05:10):
      “I’m sorry that I only listened to the people with the medical degrees who told me they knew was best and didn’t listen to you. My son.”
  • Actual film quote (Nick Reiner as Charlie, 05:10):

    "I'm sorry. Every expert with a desk and a diploma told me I had to be tough on you. But every time we sent you away to another one of those programs, I saw you slipping further away from us."

• Reported Argument Prior to the Deaths

  • Multiple sources indicate an argument occurred between Rob and Nick at Conan O’Brien’s Christmas party, the night before the bodies were found. Details remain private. (05:59)

3. Rob Reiner’s Cultural Legacy

• Film and TV Milestones

  • Directed over 20 films:
    • When Harry Met Sally, A Few Good Men, The Princess Bride, Stand By Me, Spinal Tap, The American President. (06:30–07:39)
    • Shaped the mockumentary genre with Spinal Tap.
    • Direct influence on later works (e.g., The West Wing was inspired by The American President).
  • Actor on Norman Lear’s “All in the Family” (Meathead).

• Industry Influence and Reputation

  • Known for generosity, mentorship, cameo appearances in contemporary shows (The Bear, New Girl, Curb Your Enthusiasm). (08:11–08:49)
  • Maintained a presence that inspired awe even among brief collaborators.
  • Quote (Sonia Rao, referencing cast member of The Bear, 08:11):

    "I only met him briefly on this set, but this man influenced me in an immeasurable way. You know, he's why I wanted to do comedy. He's why I wanted to do this."

• Roots and Family

  • Son of legendary comedian Carl Reiner; former spouse of Penny Marshall; married Michelle Singer Reiner after meeting her on the set of When Harry Met Sally. (09:07–09:27)
  • Daughter, relationships in entertainment.

4. Michelle Singer Reiner’s Story

• Creative and Social Impact

  • Photographer and producer, met Rob while photographing When Harry Met Sally. Their relationship influenced the film’s ultimate, hopeful ending. (09:27–10:15)
  • Quote (Sonia Rao, about the film’s revised ending, 10:10):

    “I think we should change it. I think men and women can fall in love and be friends at the same time.”

  • Iconic line from When Harry Met Sally—featured in a clip—emphasizes enduring love and resonates as part of Reiner’s own story. (10:15)

• Memorable Connection to History

  • Michelle shot Donald Trump's photo for The Art of the Deal (1987). Ironic and “especially eerie” considering later political opposition. (10:46–11:05)

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5. Social and Political Legacy

[Resumes after advertisement break at 14:18]

• Activism and Causes
  • The Reiners were major Democratic donors, outspoken advocates for progressive causes, and instrumental in helping overturn California’s Prop 8, contributing to the nationwide legalization of gay marriage. (14:29–14:48)
• Political Connections
  • Hosted fundraisers for Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama; known and respected among Democratic insiders. (14:52–15:05)
• Vocal Trump Critics
  • Rob Reiner consistently criticized Donald Trump, warning he was a “threat to democracy” and “the rule of law.” This activism continued throughout Trump’s presidency. (15:20–15:39)
  • Reiner used his comedic voice to “speak truth to power.” (15:39)
• Empathetic Leadership
  • As a director, Reiner demonstrated the same kind of empathetic, idealized leadership that marked his politics and screen portrayals (The American President, The West Wing). (16:05–17:02)
  • Clip of the famous monologue from The American President (16:30):

    "America isn't easy. America is advanced citizenship. You've gotta want it bad. Cause it's gonna put up a fight."

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6. President Trump’s Reaction and Public Response

• Trump’s Controversial Statement
  • Following the news, President Trump posted to his social network:

    "[Reiner] and his wife were killed, reportedly due to the anger he caused others through his massive, unyielding and incurable affliction with a mind crippling disease known as Trump Derangement Syndrome.” (17:29)

  • In the Oval Office, Trump repeated:

    “I wasn’t a fan of his at all. He was a deranged person as far as I’m concerned.” (18:07)

• Widespread Condemnation
  • The statement was met with shock across the political spectrum. (18:28)
  • Quote (Sonia Rao, 18:28):

    “I mean, I would say folks on both sides of the aisle… were shocked by that. I think it's startling to see the President of the United States share such words about such a tragic incident.”

  • Observers expressed disbelief that Trump would use a personal family tragedy to further political animosity, especially given the lack of evidence of any political motive in the murders. (19:24–19:49)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• Nick Reiner on the cycle of addiction (Access Hollywood interview clip, 03:30):

  "I was like, okay, I'm pretty bored of this. It wasn't like, I want to go back to be well. I was like, I'm sick of this cycle. This using drugs, it being so temporary, the fix, then going back into a place for months on end, then getting out and just, you know, rinse washes, just being my life."

• Rob Reiner’s philosophy on love (as immortalized in When Harry Met Sally, 10:15):

  "I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible."

• On Trump’s response (Sonia Rao, 18:28):

  “There's a level of disbelief I felt reading that despite having seen previous posts of his that are along those same lines about different incidents. I think everybody was very surprised by the tenor of that post.”

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Important Timestamps

• 00:02 — Opening; news of the Reiners’ deaths and Nick’s arrest
• 03:30 — Nick Reiner describes addiction cycle (audio clip)
• 05:10 — Emotional apology from "Being Charlie" (audio clip)
• 05:59 — Details about the reported argument before the incident
• 06:30–08:49 — Rob Reiner’s cultural and industry legacy
• 09:27–10:15 — How Rob met Michelle; link to When Harry Met Sally
• 10:46 — Michelle’s photo of Donald Trump for The Art of the Deal
• 14:18–17:02 — The Reiners’ political activism
• 16:30 — Michael Douglas’s speech from The American President (clip)
• 17:29 — Trump’s public statement
• 18:28 — Public and political reactions to Trump’s post
• 20:08 — Breaking news: DA formally charges Nick Reiner

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Closing Thoughts

The episode underscores Rob Reiner’s vast contributions to film, TV, and public life—a legacy marked as much by creative vision as by advocacy for social justice. The podcast thoughtfully navigates the layers of personal tragedy, lasting cultural influence, and volatile political climate surrounding the Reiners’ deaths. While the news is tragic and complicated by family conflict, the love, work, and ideals of both Rob and Michelle Reiner remain celebrated, even as the industry and their admirers process an untimely loss.

Transcript

[Colby Ekowitz]

From I'll have what she's having to you Can't Handle the Truth. Rob Reiner's films gave us some of the most iconic movie moments of all time. He directed more than 20 films including When Harry Met Sally, A Few Good Men and the Princess Bride. On Saturday afternoon, Reiner and his wife Mary Michelle Singer were found dead in their Los Angeles home. He was 78 and she was 70. Late Sunday night, their son, 32 year old Nick Reiner was arrested on suspicion of their murder. He's now being held in an LA Correctional center without bail. The Reiners were Hollywood royalty. He an actor, director, her a photographer and a producer. They both were influential in Democratic politics and causes. And the news of their deaths have devastated both the entertainment and political worlds. From the newsroom of the Washington Post, this is Post Reports. I'm Colby ekowitz. It's Tuesday, December 16th. Today we speak to Post features reporter Sonia Rao about the death of Rob Reiner, his cultural and political legacy and how President Donald Trump responded to Reiner's passing. Sonia, thank you so much for joining me.

[Sonia Rao]

Hi, thank you for having me.

[Colby Ekowitz]

So Sonia, I mean when I heard about the details of the death of Rob Reiner and his wife Michelle Singer Reiner, it's tragic and difficult to fathom. You and I were talking Tuesday morning. What do we know at this point about what happened?

[Sonia Rao]

So we know that Rob Reiner, the filmmaker and his wife Michelle Singer Reiner, a photographer and producer, were found dead in their home in Brentwood neighborhood in Los Angeles. They were found Sunday afternoon Pacific time. We don't know exactly when their murders happened at this point. And I say murders because police are investigating this as a homicide.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Right.

[Sonia Rao]

In the immediate aftermath of this news spreading, it wasn't clear who the suspect was. There were rumors flying around about a disturbed family member perhaps. Now we do know that the Los Angeles authorities are looking into their son, actually Nick Reiner, who has struggled with substance abuse issues in the past. That has definitely put a strain on their relationship and they've been very open about that.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Yeah. Tell me a little bit more about Nick's relationship with his parents. And I don't know if there's been a discussion of motive.

[Sonia Rao]

There definitely has not been a public discussion of motive from him, at least in terms of what they, you know, both parents and son have talked about publicly in the media. They made a film together. Rob Reiner directed. Nick co wrote the screenplay for it based on his own experiences.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Being Charlie, right, is the name of the movie.

[Sonia Rao]

Being Charlie is The name of the film. They've had a very tumultuous relationship, starting from, you know, his teen years. Nick was using. He was in and out of rehab facilities. He's been open, even sitting next to his father in interviews about the fact that he didn't always feel like that was the best treatment for him. One of those interviews was with Access Hollywood in 2016.

[Nick Reiner (clip)]

I was like, okay, I'm pretty bored of this. It wasn't like, I want to go back to be well. I was like, I'm sick of this cycle. This using drugs, it being so temporary, the fix, then going back into a place for months on end, then getting out and just, you know, rinse washes, just being my life.

[Sonia Rao]

Yeah, I think it built some resentment at times. But they would make up, right? They would make up, they would fight, they would make up again. And I think that, you know, a lot of people who are familiar with addiction and substance abuse issues can relate to that relationship. And I think that's part of why they were so open about it. You know, it's not an easy ride, especially not for the parents and not for the person using. And so I think they were trying their best to take care of their kid. And so I think this was really shocking both to the public and those who knew the Reiners as well, because.

[Colby Ekowitz]

When they did their movie Being Charlie Together, which was about a famous person and his son's drug addiction, they talked about how it was healing in many ways to work on that film together. Cause it opened up a lot of those. A lot of the, you know, the conversations that maybe they hadn't had about how Nick felt, that, you know, maybe the therapies and the rehab weren't the best course of treatment, that he wasn't maybe getting the support that he needed at the time. Yeah.

[Sonia Rao]

And I think there's a line in the film that both the Reiners, you know, both father and son, kind of narrowed in on, especially Rob Reiner when discussing this film. I'm paraphrasing here, but it amounts to, you know, I'm sorry that I only listened to the people with the medical degrees who told me they knew was best and didn't listen to you. My son.

[Nick Reiner (clip)]

I'm sorry. Every expert with a desk and a diploma told me I had to be tough on you. But every time we sent you away to another one of those programs, I saw you slipping further away from us.

[Sonia Rao]

And I think, again, that's just a story that I'm sure resonates with so many families. I think Nick was saying, you know, my parents didn't know what to believe. They didn't know whether to believe me or to believe these medical professionals saying I was manipulating them. And it's just. It's such a difficult situation to hear people talk about. And they put it out there. You know, they did that in a movie.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Right. And I know that you said that we don't know specifically what the motive was, but there has been reporting that Rob and his son had an argument over the weekend. What do we know about that?

[Sonia Rao]

Yes, there have been multiple sources stating that they had some sort of argument that was audible to others at Conan o' Brien's Christmas party, which is an annual event, I believe. And so that was the night before their bodies were found. That was Saturday of this past weekend. That's all we know. I don't think there are any details just yet on what they were talking about, why the fight escalated to the point where others were aware of what was happening.

[Colby Ekowitz]

But.

[Sonia Rao]

But, you know, there was an indication that maybe their relationship was not in a great place right now.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Yeah, I mean, Rob Reiner was a legend. And I wanna spend some time with you talking about the impact that he had on our culture on moviemaking. I mean, When Harry Met Sally, which is one of my all time favorite movies, Same is considered one of the best romantic comedies of all time. Right. I mean, he set the tone for maybe every romantic comedy to come. Let's walk through, you know, his cultural legacy.

[Sonia Rao]

Yeah. I mean, I think it's. It's almost hard to pick titles when you talk about Ralph Reiner, because, I mean, I think you can say it starts with Spinal Tap.

[Ashley Flowers]

Right.

[Sonia Rao]

And you look at the mockumentary genre, what would that look like without this rock band mockumentary. Right. Spinal Tap. And this is the 80s we're talking about. And there's been so much since that's been influenced by him. But even before that, you know, Norman Lear, who made all in the Family with Rob Reiner as an actor, he was a big reason that Spinal Tap got made in the first place. So we're talking TV legacy, we're talking comedy legacy, we're talking film legacy. Right. The West Wing would not exist if not for the American President, which Rob.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Writer is also one of my favorite movies of all time.

[Sonia Rao]

Exactly. So I think, you know, there's his works, there's A Few Good Men, there's Stand By Me, of course.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Yes. The Princess Bride.

[Sonia Rao]

The Princess Bride. There are these incredible iconic titles. And then there's also his legacy, which shows up in other people's work. And I think a huge part of Rob Reiner's legacy is that, you know, there are a lot of folks who speak to the fact that they met him once, they met him twice, and they were impacted. You know, they were changed. I was actually just thinking about his appearance in the Bear, which happened this year.

[Colby Ekowitz]

That's right. Right.

[Sonia Rao]

He shows up. I didn't know he was showing up. And I went, what? Rob Reiner's on the show? Yeah, but, you know, I was on Instagram yesterday and Iowa Debris was posting about him saying, you know, I only met him briefly on this set, but this man influenced me in an immeasurable way. You know, he's why I wanted to do comedy. He's why I wanted to do this.

[Colby Ekowitz]

It's so true that he did kind of have cameos in so many things from Sleepless in Seattle to Curb youb Enthusiasm to New Girl with Noe Deschanel. Like he. He played her dad. Was that his reputation, that he just kind of would agree to come on and do these things for other people in the industry?

[Sonia Rao]

I mean, I have to imagine there was some sort of interest vested in the characters he was playing, but he did, you know, by all accounts, just seem like a guy who wanted to support other people's art.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Yeah.

[Sonia Rao]

And you know, you can see that in the interviews, in photographs of him always smiling, almost always beaming in photographs. He comes from a family in entertainment, so.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Right.

[Sonia Rao]

Of course, in some ways, you know, the son of Carl Reiner. Yes. Maybe he was born for it, but I think, you know, he really fostered that spirit in so many collaborators and so many fans who maybe never even met him that, you know, we're lucky that he did what he did.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Yeah. Let's talk about his wife, Michelle Singer Reiner. Tell me about her.

[Sonia Rao]

Yeah, so they met in the 80s, late 80s. Rob was previously married to Penny Marshall, also beloved actress and director. They met on the set of When Harry Met Sally. Actually she was working as a photographer at the time.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Uh huh.

[Ashley Flowers]

Yeah.

[Sonia Rao]

You know, I don't think he was expecting to fall in love with her. I don't think he was expecting to fall in love at all at that point. And spoiler alert, I guess for those who still haven't seen this movie, which I would suggest remedying, the original ending of this film was supposed to end with best friends not getting together. You know, Harry and Sally were not supposed to end up together, but Rob Reiner meets Michelle, his future wife, and says you know what? I think we should change it. I think men and women can fall in love and be friends at the same time.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Yeah.

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And love is real.

[Sonia Rao]

And love is real. And it endures. And he ended up changing the end of that film.

[Nick Reiner (clip)]

I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.

[Sonia Rao]

And I don't know what When Harry Met Sally would have been without that ending.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Right.

[Sonia Rao]

I don't know if it would have endured the same way. Maybe it would have. I don't want to discredit Nora Ephron's screenplay, which is brilliant, but it is.

[Colby Ekowitz]

An ending that, like, sticks with you absolutely forever.

[Sonia Rao]

So I just, I can't imagine how special it was to have that permanent, you know, memory.

[Colby Ekowitz]

She also, I read she was the photographer that took Donald Trump's photo For his 1987 book, the Art of the Deal. Now, talk about things that are seared in your mind. Like that image of Trump on the COVID of that book, I feel like is seared in the mind of so many people. That's fascinating.

[Sonia Rao]

It really is. When you look at what the relationship between President Trump and this couple became. Yeah. Down the road, I mean, there's so many instances like that in life. But learning of that was especially eerie to me.

[Colby Ekowitz]

After the break, the Reiners social and political impact and President Trump's shocking response to their deaths. We'll be right back.

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[Sonia Rao]

So obviously.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Rob Reiner had a huge impact on our culture, but he and his wife were also incredibly active in social causes, Democratic politics. What were some of the things that they cared most about?

[Sonia Rao]

I would say the hallmark achievement of Rob Reiner and Michelle Singer Reiner, who also helped with this, was helping overturn Prop 8, this piece of legislation that banned gay marriage in California, which then.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Kind of led to the Supreme Court case that legalized gay marriage across the country.

[Sonia Rao]

Yeah, so I'm not saying they're single handedly responsible for anything, but that was a huge piece.

[Colby Ekowitz]

They were also really prominent Democratic donors. Yes, as I Understand it. And I remember this from my years covering politics. They held fundraisers for Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama. They were just very much of that world.

[Sonia Rao]

Mm. And, you know, after the news of their death spread, this isn't unusual for any major figure, but there was a lot of outpouring of support and expressed grief from. From those Democratic politicians that knew them on a personal level.

[Colby Ekowitz]

And also, Sonia, you alluded to the fact that they were critics of President Trump. Rob Reiner consistently was warning that Trump was a threat to democracy, to the rule of law. I know that was true. In Trump's first term. Did he continue to be that outspoken in the last year?

[Sonia Rao]

I would say it was, especially during the first term, but that's continued. There's such a aspect of comedy where comedians, you know, are kind of one of the folks who speak truth to power in many ways. And I think Rob Reiner was a big supporter of that. I think he believed in using his platform to espouse his beliefs. And so that, to me, that spirit did seem, you know, to be with him right until the end.

[Colby Ekowitz]

I mean, and Rob Reiner obviously had this idealized version of politics. You mentioned the American president, which was the inspiration, then later for the West Wing. Both of those, that movie and that TV show show this ideal version of what a president should be or could be. And there's the famous monologue at the end of the American President when Michael Douglas talks about what leadership looks like.

[Nick Reiner (clip)]

America isn't easy. America is advanced citizenship. You've gotta want it bad. Cause it's gonna put up a fight.

[Colby Ekowitz]

So I imagine that that's always been a part of who Reiner was.

[Sonia Rao]

Yeah. And I think even, you know, in terms of leadership, being a director, you.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Are leading a set.

[Sonia Rao]

Right. You have department heads who are working under you, you have people working under them. You know, you're the boss. And so I think he understood what it meant to be an empathetic leader in many ways.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Yeah.

[Sonia Rao]

Again, the responsibilities are entirely different when you're talking about an actual politician versus a director on a film set. But there are parallels. And all of his collaborators, especially as they're grieving him, but even before that, when they were doing interviews, just about working with him when he was still with us, very open about the fact that he was a thoughtful leader and always put his people first. And I think that translates to the way he looked at the world at large.

[Colby Ekowitz]

I mean, speaking of Trump, the president posted about the Reiners death in a way that stood in pretty stark contrast to what the the other past presidents and other condolences that poured in yesterday. I wanted to read you a part of what President Trump said on his social media network. He said that Reiner and his wife were killed, quote, reportedly due to the anger he caused others through his massive, unyielding and incurable affliction with a mind crippling disease known as Trump Derangement Syndrome. Then later Monday in the Oval Office, some reporters asked Trump about this and Trump doubled down.

[Nick Reiner (clip)]

Well, I wasn't a fan of his at all. He was a deranged person as far.

[Sonia Rao]

As Trump is concerned.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Trump posts a lot of shocking things about his perceived political enemies, but this feels particularly awful. And there's been some really strong reaction to this post. What have you seen people saying about it?

[Sonia Rao]

I mean, I would say folks on both sides of the aisle, if we're still referring to the aisle these days, we're shocked by that. I think it's startling to see the President of the United States share such words about such a tragic incident. There's a level of disbelief I felt reading that despite having seen previous posts of his that are along those same lines about different incidents. I think everybody was very surprised by the tenor of that post. It's no secret that Reiner wasn't a fan of Trump and vice versa as a result. But I think this was really a moment of shock for everyone. I mean, even if somehow you escaped Rob Reiner's filmography and haven't seen any of his TV shows or films or any of his appearances, I think you can look at what happened, you can look at the facts of what happened and say, wow, I can't believe our President is posting that.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Well, and making what it seems like a situation within a family that turned incredibly tragic into something that is about him. When it does not appear that their murders had anything to do with their.

[Sonia Rao]

Opposition to charge and there has been no indication of that at all from police or, you know, any sources yet.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Well, Sonia, thank you so much. I know that I'm gonna spend my weekend rewatching When Harry Met Sally for the millionth time and just remembering all their Rob Reiner gave us.

[Sonia Rao]

So yeah, I'll be doing the same.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Thanks for joining me.

[Sonia Rao]

Thanks so much.

[Colby Ekowitz]

Sonia Ra is a features reporter for the Post. Right before we were set to publish this episode, the LA County District Attorney announced in a press conference that Nick Reiner is being charged with two counts of first degree murder for the alleged killing of his parents. He could face life in prison without parole, without or even the death penalty. That's it for Post Reports. Thanks for listening. We are so grateful to have you as a listener. Now we want to learn more about your listening habits and how you think we can be better. We've got a new survey that we're running for a limited time, and we would love to hear from you. It shouldn't take more than 10 minutes to complete. To do that, you go to washingtonpost.com podcastsurvey again, that is washingtonpost.com podcastsurveY when you're done, you can enter to win $100 gift card. So one more time if that got your attention. That is washingtonpost.com podcastsurvey Today's show was produced by Sabi Robinson. It was mixed by Sam Baer and edited by Peter Bresnan. Thanks to editor Jonathan Fisher. I'm Colby Ekowitz. We'll be back tomorrow with more stories from the Washington Post.

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