Closer to My Dreams

Summary

Pour Minds Podcast – "Closer to My Dreams"

Date: October 10, 2025
Hosts: Lex P & Drea Nicole
Main Theme:
Lex and Drea, two single women from Houston living in Atlanta, unpack their lives, dating, and friendship—serving up unfiltered "drunk therapy" girl talk, sprinkled with laughter, personal stories, and strong opinions, all over their favorite wine.

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1. Episode Overview

• The episode features just Lex and Drea (no guests) on the couch, catching up and diving into hot topics.
• Key themes: personal style, boundaries in friendships and dating, the double standards Black women face in media, sexual confidence and hygiene, and ultimate honesty in friendships.
• The vibe is candid, comedic, and proudly Southern Black, with plenty of playful banter, life advice, music hot takes, and product recommendations.

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2. Key Discussion Points & Insights

Home Decor, Personality, and Public Opinion

[01:16–12:34]

• Lex discusses decorating her new home, and how everyone on social media has opinions on her choices (“cheetah carpet is crazy!”).
• The ladies critique “tacky” design trends and stress doing what feels good personally instead of crowd-pleasing.
  • Lex: "If you are not a professional, you can keep your opinions to yourself." [02:14]
• They reflect on how everyone becomes an online expert, catching stray judgments.
  • Drea: "At the end of the day, you ain't never coming to Lex's house. You never gotta worry about that cheetah carpet." [02:11]

Voice, Positivity, and Social Media

[03:26–06:01]

• Lex and Drea joke about people telling Drea she has an “audiobook” voice.
• They discuss being positive influences online and “eating down” with motivational TikToks.
  • Drea: "You can choose the life you want. Just cut them people off." [05:50]

Fashion Deep-Dive: Yagi World

[06:05–09:46]

• Both gush about the Black-owned clothing brand Yagi World, touting its quality and fit ("this is not an ad”).
  • Lex: "This is not a game, and this is not a joke. I love Yagi World." [06:42]
  • Drea: "This material is good, you could wash it, it's gonna bounce back." [08:02]
• Color preferences and personal style philosophies: Lex prefers neutrals (“cream, brown, and black me down”), highlighting her personality as the “color” in her life.

Dorm Life, Cleanliness, and Hygiene Talk

[13:10–18:38]

• Reminiscing about dorm room décor and the influence of environment on academic motivation.
• The reality of dorm issues: rats, shared bathrooms, "messy" women's bathrooms.
  • Lex: "As a woman, cleaning is therapeutic to me... Being in my house, it makes me feel cozy. It's my sanctuary." [15:13]
• No shame about periods, pads, or hygiene—advocating for openness among women.
  • Lex: "Why do we have to hide the fact that we're on our period? Just hand me the pad." [17:01]
  • They share personal stories, including Lex's struggle with fibroids and period woes.

Double Standards for Black Women in Media

[27:57–38:34]

• Black celebrities (e.g., Oprah, Beyoncé) must keep their personal lives private to maintain status, contrasted to white celebs like the Kardashians, who profit off transparency.
• The relentless scrutiny and shaming of Black women for life choices—single motherhood, romantic partnerships.
  • Drea: "Single mother is ‘baby mama’ for Black women." [30:39]
• Comparing Love & Hip Hop’s impact on Young Joc’s public image versus white reality stars’ trajectory.
• Both admit that oversharing in the Black community often leads to detriment, while white stars are afforded vulnerability and public empathy.

Should Women Be “Meaner” or Nicer to Men?

[21:00–26:32]

• Do men actually prefer “mean” women? The hosts laugh about men chasing women who play hard-to-get and how “niceness” rarely pays off.
  • Drea: "They love mean bitches. Think about your favorite man and the meanest woman he was with." [22:13]
• Lex pushes back: playing games isn’t sustainable—she prefers real fun and connection, not performative bitchiness.

Songs & Artists They “Hate” That Everyone Loves

[41:17–50:50]

• Playfully controversial takes: Popular songs that are universally loved but secretly disliked by the hosts.
  • Lex: "Closer to My Dreams" is a hard pass—"That sh*t stinks. You're not getting closer to your dreams, you're about to fail." [41:19]
  • Drea: Tired of Kim’s “I Can’t Stop Loving You” and Mary J. Blige’s “Family Affair.”
  • Both: “Swag Surfin’” is overplayed.
  • Fun discussion of nostalgia, musical taste, and crowd pressure at Black gatherings.
  • Lex clarifies past takes: She doesn’t hate Eminem or Trey Songz, just thinks their music “didn't age well” [49:47].

Music and Pop Culture Picks

[68:10–71:32]

• Lex: Anticipating Queen Naija’s new song “Rain”—calls out artists for slacking on music videos.
• Drea: Praises Mariah the Scientist’s album, especially “Easy to Cry” ft. Kali Uchis, for deep, relatable songwriting.

Friendship, Sex, and What to Share

[52:09–57:35]

• Do you tell your friends everything about your sex life?—some do, some don’t; to each her own.
  • Drea: “Your friends don’t need to know everything...But I feel like that’s what friendship is for. You supposed to share stuff.” [53:57]
• No fear of “friends stealing your man”—real friends can share openly without drama.
• “Good d*ck” and its dangers: A debate about quality, attachment, and the pitfalls of “backtracking.”
  • Lex: “Sometimes when you make sweet love, you be like, ‘Oh, I love him again.’ It never stopped.” [59:22]

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3. Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

"If you are not a professional, you can keep your opinions to yourself." – Lex [02:14]

"At the end of the day, you ain't never coming to Lex's house. You never gotta worry about that cheetah carpet." – Drea [02:11]

"You can choose the life you want. Just cut them people off." – Drea [05:50]

"Closer to My Dreams...That sh*t stinks. You're not getting closer to your dreams, you're about to fail. And I'm a hater, so I'm laughing!" – Lex [41:19]

"Single mother is ‘baby mama’ for Black women." – Drea [30:39]

"If a girl needs a pad, just hand it to her. Who cares if these men are uncomfortable? Nobody cares." – Lex [18:42]

"They love mean bitches. Think about your favorite man and the meanest woman he was with." – Drea [22:13]

"We need to start wanting things that are for us, that God sent to us. This is not sent by God." – Lex (on emotionally unavailable men) [75:50]

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4. Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:16–12:34: House décor, social pressure, and personal style
• 13:10–18:38: Dorm life, hygiene, and openness about women's issues
• 21:00–26:32: Being “mean” to men and modern dating dynamics
• 27:57–38:34: Black women in the media and privacy double standards
• 41:17–50:50: Unpopular music opinions—what classic songs they secretly hate
• 52:09–57:35: Sex, friendships, and the politics of oversharing
• 68:10–71:32: Music recs: Queen Naija, Mariah the Scientist
• 75:01–78:42: Listener “pour your heart out” questions: Moving on from unavailable men
• 79:07–81:14: Listener question: Setting boundaries and exclusivity in relationships

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5. Fun & Product Recommendations

• Fashion: Yagi World gets continuous love for top-tier clothing, material, and versatility.
• Self-care: “Her Fantasy Box” wipes, coochie wash, and “everywhere deodorant” for intimate freshness.
• Home: C. Freeman CBD-infused candles (“Laundry Day” and “Satin Sheets”) praised for scent and relaxation vibes.

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6. Audience Engagement & Closing

• Questions for listeners: What classic songs do you hate? Do you tell your friends everything about your sex life? Tap into the conversation in comments.
• The episode closes with their staple “Pour Your Heart Out” segment—listener advice, lots of affirmations, and plenty of inside jokes (“If you tell your friend how good his d*ck is, she might steal your man. Up one, but that’s never been a fear of mine.”).

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TL;DR:
A warm, uproarious, and relatable session of Black millennial girl talk where Lex and Drea keep it all the way real about life, relationships, the perils of public opinion, and the importance of true friendship and self-respect—all with signature humor and Houston-Atlanta flavor.

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Listen for:

• Laughs, real talk, and unfiltered best friend energy
• Commentary on Black womanhood, sex, and dating today
• Saucy hot takes (especially about overplayed songs!)
• Useful product recs and self-care gems

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For more, follow Lex and Drea’s stories and shop their faves (see Yagi World, Her Fantasy Box, C. Freeman candles). And join the comments to share your own “unpopular” song opinions or friendship confessions!

Transcript

[A]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[B]

The murder of an 18 year old girl in Graves County, Kentucky went unsolved for years until a local housewife, a journalist, and a handful of girls came forward with a story.

[A]

America, y' all better wake the hell up.

[C]

Bad things happens to good people in small towns.

[B]

Listen to Graves county on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. And to binge the entire season ad free. Subscribe to Lava for Good plus on Apple Podcasts. Short on time, but big on true crime.

[A]

On a recent episode of the podcast.

[B]

Hunting for Answers, I highlighted the story of 19 year old Lachey Dungy.

[A]

But she never knocked on that door. She never made it inside.

[B]

And that text message would be the.

[A]

Last time anyone would ever hear from her. Listen to Hunting for Answers from the Black Effect podcast Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[C]

But anyways, I was saying it was so crazy because somebody was like, Lex, your per. Your house needs to match your personality. You need to have a cheetah carpet in there. Cheetah carpet. Y' all are, I'm not gonna lie, some of the suggestions y' all have been giving me have been great. Love it. But y' all are so tacky with y' all suggestions that y' all have been giving my house. And don't get me wrong, some people probably look at my house and be like, lex, this is tacky. But it works for me. I like, but cheetah carpet is crazy.

[A]

That's them people that be having them sparkly tables in they ho.

[C]

That mirrored furniture.

[A]

Mm, damn. And then they be doing. Then they be doing they drapes like a black one, a red one, a black one.

[C]

Oh my God, please don't get me started. And then.

[A]

And they swear they be eating home before it down.

[C]

They curtains stop at the bottom of the window. Curtains don't even hit the floor. You know what I'm saying? Like we not going. We not.

[A]

They pots match the drapes.

[C]

Oh my God.

[A]

You know, it's okay. Everything ain't for everybody. And I just feel like if you are not a professional, you can keep your opin opinions to yourself. You could just see content like it and then. Or not like it or not like it or not like it. Yeah, about your business. Because at the end of the day, you ain't never coming to Lick's house. You ain't never gonna be in her house. You never gotta worry about it. You ain't never got to worry about not seeing that cheetah carpet. Cuz you ain't gonna be there and.

[C]

It ain't gonna be no cheetah carpet.

[A]

But I'm saying they don't have to worry about not seeing it because they suggested it and you not gonna have it.

[C]

And I've only been in my house at this part, at this point. Like by the time this episode airs, I've only been in the house for a month and a half, two months. Just wait.

[A]

The cheetah coming.

[C]

Okay, bitch, don't piss me off. What's up, y'? All? It's your girl Lex P. And it's.

[A]

Your girl Drea Nicole.

[C]

And you are tuned in to another episode of Poor Minds where a drunk.

[A]

Mind speaks sober thoughts.

[C]

We ain't got no guests today.

[A]

We ain't got no guests today.

[C]

I feel like they already be knowing that we don't have a guest. Cause I be on this couch for sure. But the audio people don't know. Yeah, but the people that watching, they know because they like, oh, Lex on the couch.

[A]

But they need to tune in to the YouTube channel. Cause I feel like we're just so expressive and animated that you need to.

[C]

Watch it instead of listening.

[A]

I mean, we still need them audiences.

[C]

That's what I was about to say. Don't direct them away. Sometimes people be on the way to work. They be working now. Sometimes they may be in church or we might.

[A]

What if we the background music for somebody effing. Have you ever thought about that?

[C]

If somebody is at me saying, you know what?

[A]

Let me bleep that out. It's the first five minutes of that effing.

[C]

If somebody is listening to us while they're doing it. But you know what?

[A]

Speak for yourself. I feel like my voice is soothing.

[C]

That's what you think it is?

[A]

Yeah. I think that people be telling me I need to start doing audiobooks now.

[C]

I do agree with that.

[A]

I do agree. Sugar o' Trey Nicole. And you are tuned in to Sista Soulja, the coldest one ever.

[C]

I think that your voice is like, soothing to go to sleep. I wouldn't say I hear your voice and it be like, ooh, that made me want to do something.

[A]

I feel like it's sexy. Like it make you want to moan better. The gym was like, I love Draya's voice. She's just so. It's so sexy.

[C]

It's sultry. Okay. See, to me it's more soothing.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

It's more like it makes me go to sleep, like, in a good way.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Like, you know, you listen to certain things, and it'll make you, like, you.

[A]

Know, it relaxes you.

[C]

It's a relaxing. I like it. I do like it. I do like it.

[A]

So when you. If you having a bad day, you be like, let me go listen to Dre, y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

Because let me tell you something.

[C]

One thing I know is when you.

[A]

Stay positive, two things for sure. Exactly. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

You be eating down when you do your positive TikTok videos.

[A]

Hey, they be eating the girls up.

[C]

You know, I'm there.

[A]

I'm full of wisdom.

[C]

You can choose the life you want. Just cut them people off.

[A]

Cut them off.

[C]

If you don't like somebody, I be.

[A]

Like, get them hoes. The boot.

[C]

Give them.

[A]

I love a boot emoji. Kick a hoe to the curb.

[C]

Kick a hoe to the curb. But outside of that, we're matching today.

[A]

We are. We are matching with our Yagi Girl. Yagi World.

[C]

Yagi Girl.

[A]

And a Yagi World, Yagi Girls in a Yagi World. We are matching with our Yagi World outfits. And I feel like it's cute because it shows the, like.

[C]

Oh, I'm contrast my watch on top. Yeah, I know. You gotta tell me the rules now.

[A]

Okay, you had it underneath.

[C]

I never noticed that.

[A]

But I feel like it shows the contrast and the versatility of the outfits. Because I have mine a little dress down. I have on, you know, my little Hermes slides. And then you have on your Louboutin platforms. So it shows how you can, like, dress it up or down.

[C]

First of all, let me tell y' all something. This is not a game, and this is not a joke. I love Yaggie World.

[A]

Me, too.

[C]

This is not an ad. They sent us a PR box. And when I tell y', all, I really wear their stuff because that material.

[A]

It's the material.

[C]

Yagi, I don't know what you did or what you put in these clothes or who you working with, but keep that a secret, because baby girl top set you up.

[A]

We need to show them the whole feet.

[C]

Show them. Get up and show that ass. No, Drea, show them what you working with. Bend over. And bend over, too.

[A]

Bend over.

[C]

See, I knew she was gonna do it, but no, it's really Tea. It's really, really T. Yagi. Like, that's the girl's name. We met Yaggie before when we were in London.

[A]

Super sweet.

[C]

We did black owned business. Shout out to you, Yagi, I really love these outfits.

[A]

I do, too. And we gonna wear em again because we got Two other colors. So the next time, she gonna have on the gray one and I'mma have on the pink one.

[C]

And I'm not gonna lie, y' all gonna see me in the pink one again.

[A]

I don't care one thing about me. I repeat to my yaggy one thing about it.

[C]

We gonna repeat that yagi.

[A]

I don't give a damn.

[C]

That's what it's made for. That's what it's made for. To repeat it. Usher did his thing with that.

[A]

These outfits are such good material. And then on top of that, if you have to purchase them, like, we're so fortunate that she just be sitting. We are so fortunate, girl. We are so fortunate that they be sending us to stuff for free so we don't have to pay for it. But these outfits are expensive. Like, this is like 120, $130. But it's worth the money because the material is good. And, like, you could wash it. It's gonna bounce back. Pristine condition. You not gonna. If you snag it.

[C]

But you really ain't gonna snag. You're not gonna snag it. Cause it ain't nothing to snag. Cause it's all recessed, isn't it?

[A]

I be snagging my stuff. But that's just everybody. That's.

[C]

Cause you got that jewelry.

[A]

That's why I be. But I don't got it on today. You right. This ain't even all my jewelry.

[C]

I just want to say this, though. They do send us stuff. But I have purchased a lot from Yogi World.

[A]

I've purchased a few things.

[C]

That purple outfit I had on with the bob and all. Y' all were in the comments like, lex, this looks so good. This purple. It was from Yagi World. Yeah. And I'm not even a girl who wears colors. I do not like colors. You don't?

[A]

I don't think I've ever seen you in color.

[C]

Cream, brown and black. Me down. I don't like it.

[A]

I don't think I ever seen you in purple pink, either.

[C]

I mean, I've worn pink a few times, but I'm very, like, colorless. I'm very colorless. A colorblind nigga gonna see me and be like, she got that shit on. Cause he don't know.

[A]

You should definitely, though, start incorporating that in your wardrobe. Cause color look good on you. It look good on your skin.

[C]

But I don't know. I just feel like it's a balance. My personality is the color.

[A]

You feel like your personality already.

[C]

Loud I don't need to wear no pink and orange and blue. You know what I mean? Nah.

[A]

I feel you, though.

[C]

It's gotta have. I gotta have some type of balance in my life.

[A]

I dabble in colors sometimes, but every.

[C]

Now and then, it's crazy. Cause speaking of colors, I'm decorating my home right now. We were talking about this before we started filming, and I was like, it's so crazy. Cause everybody's an interior designer, which I don't mind. Everybody has their opinions. This is my house, but everybody's gonna have their opinions. But somebody sent me a message.

[A]

Shout out to Beyonce.

[C]

Oh, who?

[A]

They came to see who Repping like me. Don't make me get up out my seat. And it's Beyonce Eve.

[C]

Oh, it is.

[A]

And Jackson. And Jackson.

[C]

Eve. Shout out to my baby. By the time this episode dropped, my baby is getting so big.

[A]

He is.

[C]

He's turning a lighter.

[A]

I can't believe it.

[C]

Shout out to my neff. But anyways, I was saying it was so crazy. Cause somebody was like, lex, your house needs to match your personality. You need to have a cheetah carpet in there. Cheetah carpet. Y' all are. I'm not gonna lie. Some of the suggestions y' all have been giving me have been great. Love it. But y' all are so tacky with y' all suggestions that y' all have been giving my house. And don't get me wrong, some people probably look at my house and be like, lex, this is tacky. But it works for me. I like. But cheetah carpet is crazy.

[A]

That's them people that be having them sparkly tables in they hoes that mirrored furniture. Mm. Damn. And then they be doing they. Then they be doing they drapes. Like a black one, a red one, a black one.

[C]

Oh, my God, Please don't get me started.

[A]

And they swear they be eating home before they down.

[C]

They curtains stop at the bottom of the window. Curtains don't even hit the flow. You know what I'm saying? Like, we not gonna. We not.

[A]

They pots match the drapes.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[A]

You know, it's okay. Everything ain't for everybody. And I just feel like if you are not a professional, you can keep your opinions to yourself. You could just see content like it and then. Or not like it or not like it or not like it. Go about your business. Cause at the end of the day, you ain't never coming to Lex hoes. You ain't never gonna be in her house. You never gotta worry about it. You ain't never gotta worry about not seeing that Cheetah. Cause you ain't gonna be there, and.

[C]

It ain't gonna be no cheetah carpet.

[A]

But I'm saying they don't have to worry about not seeing it because they suggested it and you not gonna have it.

[C]

And I've only been in my house at this part, at this point. Like by the time this episode airs. I've only been in the house for a month and a half, two months. Just wait.

[A]

Did Cheetah come in?

[C]

Okay, bitch, that'll piss me off.

[A]

That's what she low key said.

[C]

Just wait. She gonna find a place.

[A]

She probably put it in her office. You never know.

[C]

I'm not putting Cheetah in her office. I'm not putting Cheetah.

[A]

You gonna put a little cheetah print in there.

[C]

But I am gonna put. I'm gonna get another drink machine and put that in my office.

[A]

I like animal prints a little bit.

[C]

To wear with clothes. Animal prints in your house? No.

[A]

I don't know. I like them cowhide rugs.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Maybe that's the country. Maybe that's the country in me.

[C]

A cowhide rug done right? Cause I have a cowhide rug.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I did it right. I'm not mad at that. I like a little cowhide rug. I'm not mad at that. Yes, yes. That's a little rustic farm like that.

[A]

I know, I know. I be.

[C]

Come on. A little something. Cheetah.

[A]

Cheetah was like high school, middle school. We maybe even college. We stick together. Maybe even in college. A little cheetah rug with a D. You write in that dorm room these days, did you? I seen a Tik Tok. This girl Tik Tok had went viral. She had hired an interior designer to decorate her dorm room. And it looked so good.

[C]

Right, right, right.

[A]

I was like, oh, my God, if I had that dorm room when I was in college, I would have made all A's. I wouldn't have stopped.

[C]

No, you wouldn't.

[A]

Them two classes freshman year, you would.

[C]

Have been in there fucking.

[A]

I would have been doing. I was gonna do that anyways.

[C]

First and foremost, that's how I am.

[A]

But I also would have made straight A's because it just. I feel like the environment.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

How could you not do well in that environment?

[C]

That. No, you making sense now for real.

[A]

It's created for you to flourish and for you to think and for you to have free thoughts and be able to just really be in your element. Not have no worries.

[C]

You comfortable.

[A]

It Was a rat next door.

[C]

Like a rat? Like what these Atlanta n got going on Rat or a real rat? Probably both of them.

[A]

Probably both of them. But I lived in an all girls dorm, so it was a girl rat.

[C]

Oh.

[A]

So anyways, I had a rat like my room. My friend that lived next door to me and my roommate, she had a rat infestation in her dorm room. That was the type of shit I had to worry about in college.

[C]

Oh, God, I'm glad you said that because we have to have a serious conversation.

[A]

This bitch had Paisley Prince and all type of shit in her dorm room.

[C]

The nerve. Yeah, the nerve. The nerve. The goal. But do you know what we have to seriously talk about? Y' all know I'm a girl's girl. I am. But we do have to talk about the cleanliness of my sisters when I used to work.

[A]

They made my sisters.

[C]

When I used to work in the club. Every single time. The women's bathroom was always dirtier than the men's. And I will say, it's like, it be surprising me. You know what I'm saying? It be surprising me because I feel like as a woman, that's like, cleaning is therapeutic to me. And like you said, being in a space like that, it makes you thrive. Like, that's why I've done so much with my house so quickly. Because being in my house, it makes me feel cozy. I'm comfortable. It's my sanctuary. That's why we call it the sanctuary.

[A]

That's what I'm saying. Like, I did bad in 8th period today. Let me go back in my dorm room and lay on my chase.

[C]

Yes, bitch, I had a crate in a dream, bitch. Mickey Mouse was waiting on that chase for you, bitch.

[A]

I had a crate in a dream and an IKEA gift card.

[C]

That's what I'm saying. But you can't do that. You can't do that if ratatouille's sitting in the corner.

[A]

Yeah, and luckily that never happened in our room. But next door it was like, that's the type of stuff we used to have to worry about. And we used to have to share bathrooms. We had community bathrooms.

[C]

You know what the worst thing I hate is, though? I don't care how clean you are. Going right in the bathroom after somebody else took a shower is kind of like a pet peeve of mine. I gotta let that.

[A]

What do you mean?

[C]

Cause the steam. Oh, you gotta let that pussy air out.

[A]

Unless we trying to go to the club, then it's time to go.

[C]

Yeah, now you Got to go wrap it up.

[A]

Or you can use your ass in.

[C]

The shower, your everywhere wipes.

[A]

Or you can use your, like.

[C]

Sometimes you gotta wipe that pussy down real quick. I don't got time.

[A]

Sometimes you gotta take a little hoe.

[C]

Bag, shout out to her fantasy bottle.

[A]

You could also use your coochie wash. Use your refresh.

[C]

Dr. I'm gonna wipe that thing off and.

[A]

Wipe that thing off in the sink.

[C]

And go about your business.

[A]

And they gonna think you took a shower.

[C]

Hey, you gotta get it. How you feel?

[A]

You gonna be smelling so fresh and so clean.

[C]

But can I? Since we're talking about women and hygiene and stuff like that, I'm not hiding no more when I need a pad or a tampon from somebody either. I know you don't use those products anymore, but you know how it used to be. Like, do you have a pad? Nigga's acting like we doing a drug deal. Girl, do you have a pad? Hand it to me. I asked a girl for a pad and she was like trying to slide it to me. I said, girl, give me that goddamn pad. I actually need a diaper, bitch. That's when my flow was heavy. Why do we have to hide the fact that we're on our piece?

[A]

Remember we used to wear that diaper? It was a very traumatic time for me.

[C]

But people don't know I had five.

[A]

Cause you used to be sleeping in the bed with me with a diaper off.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

It's before me and Lex really, like it was before we could afford separate hotel rooms.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

And we used to share hotel rooms. And she would just be laying in the be with that big ass diaper on.

[C]

But I didn't know I had fibroids.

[A]

Take them granny panties off.

[C]

Put the thong on. I had fibroids. I had something. I had fibroids.

[A]

So my.

[C]

If y' all have ever had fibroids, you know how serious it is. It was so like, no, I didn't know then, though. So I thought wearing a diaper was normal.

[A]

And then she would be asking me, do I wanna change it.

[C]

You should have changed my diaper. No, absolutely.

[A]

You ain't no baby. You ain't no baby.

[C]

Baby Goo Goo Gaga.

[A]

You ain't no motherfucking baby. You ain't my baby. I'm not about to change your diaper.

[C]

What the fuck? I just felt like as friends, if I needed you to change my diaper, you should have changed your diaper.

[A]

That's wild as fuck and get bled on.

[C]

You was gonna bleed on me. No, I wasn't. I was gonna hold it in.

[A]

Now we blood sisters. That's crazy.

[C]

You cross this little twin.

[A]

And I know that we locked in.

[C]

For real cause, but no, that we need to stop acting like that with other women. Like, if a girl needs a pad, just hand it to her. Who cares if these men are uncomfortable? Nobody cares. Nobody cares. Hand me the pad. Everybody has a period. I mean, not everybody, but y' all know what I'm saying. Periods are normal. Why do I have to be acting like you know what I'm saying?

[A]

Men know that we have periods, though they don't care, though. They be annoyed. Lavelle had did a video on Instagram the other day, and he was just like, if I was a woman, I would have went crazy a long ass time ago. Because y' all be having to deal with these and they don't understand that every month y' all be literally shedding y' all insides and y' all be going crazy.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

And they be mad at you because you can't them be like, man, this on her period again. She tripping.

[C]

That's the truth.

[A]

That really is how they be.

[C]

He said the same thing. He was like, you know, being a woman is like crazy. Because on top of paying bills, on top of showing up for your family, on top of being a mother, on top of doing all this, you have to bleed every month. You didn't volunteer for this. You didn't ask for this. You're just bleeding.

[A]

And the only other alternative is being pregnant or menopause. Them the only other alternatives to having a period every month. Either you not having one cause you pregnant. Or infertile.

[C]

Right.

[A]

Or menopausal.

[C]

Right. Right.

[A]

That's it.

[C]

It's just a lot. It's a lot. It's a lot. And I'm just. I'm not for it. So I'm never.

[A]

Or hysterectomy.

[C]

Hysterectomy.

[A]

Which is worse because when people get hysterectomies, it puts them into early menopause. Why are you doing that and why is it called his?

[C]

Cause it's a really.

[A]

Hysterectomy.

[C]

Well, you said hish.

[A]

I said historicity.

[C]

Okay, maybe I'm just. It's. You see, Tyler been. I didn't wanna. I like a little hish. Well, I said hiss.

[A]

The reckon Shay.

[C]

Yeah, she Shawnee. Excuse me, Shani, do you know where I can find some booty? What was that from? So let's move on. Let's move on. Let's move on.

[A]

Let's get into it. We are.

[C]

Okay, so the first topic, Dre, what we talking about today?

[A]

So for the first topic, we're talking about should we be nicer to men? Which I feel like kind of goes into what we were just talking about. Should we wash our mouths when we talking to our men? Should we in general be meaner to men or should we keep being nice? I personally, my best friend shout out Celine. She had a tweet that went viral a few weeks ago.

[C]

Lynn is crazy. A little bit.

[A]

She is a little bit. But she had went viral because she had said men love mean. Like be mean to. They like that. Like the women who are nice to them. You always gonna end up getting the short end of the stick. And I'm like, yeah, I understand it. It's just like that meme I be seeing when it be like love who ain't got. I'm thinking of getting rid of my all of mine. I'm gonna get rid of all my. Oh, I take. I might.

[C]

I do.

[A]

Cause they love it. They gon boost. They gonna build you back up.

[C]

I don't want it. I don't want a that bad.

[A]

So it's like yes. Love a bitch, Wayne.

[C]

Gotcha. They do.

[A]

And they love mean bitches. Think about your favorite and think about the bitch who was the meanest to him that he probably told you about and all the stuff he did for her.

[C]

All I know is what I've been told. And that's a half truth is a whole lie.

[B]

For almost a decade, the murder of an 18 year old girl from a small town in Graves County, Kentucky went unsolved until a local homemaker, a journalist, and a handful of girls came forward with a story.

[C]

I'm telling you, we know Quincy killed her.

[B]

We know a story that law enforcement used to convict six people and that got the citizen investigator on national tv.

[C]

Through sheer persistence and nerve, this Kentucky housewife helped give justice to Jessica Curran.

[B]

My name is Maggie Freeling. I'm a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist producer. And I wouldn't be be here if the truth were that easy to find.

[C]

I did not know her and I did not kill her or rape or burn or any of that other stuff.

[A]

That y' all said. They literally made me say that I took a match and struck and threw it on her. They made me say that I poured gas on her.

[B]

From lava for good. This is Graves County, a show about just how far our legal system will go in order to find someone to blame.

[A]

America.

[C]

Y' all better wake the hell up. Bad Things happens to good people and small towns.

[B]

Listen to Graves county in the Bone Valley feed on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And to binge the entire season ad free, subscribe to Lava for Good plus on Apple Podcast.

[C]

That don't apply to me. Keep going though.

[A]

You ain't never had. You ain't never dealt with a. And you feel like. Or you was being mean to him and he was doing the most. Like, I guess I could say that for myself. Like, I feel like I done dealt with dudes and like, I really was cool on them. Like, I really wasn't with them. And they thought I was playing hard to get. They thought I was playing. Oh, you want me to chase you? Actually, I want you to leave me the fuck alone. But it's making you go harder.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. Now I do agree with that. Because men do like to chase.

[A]

Yeah. Is it to chase, though? Or is it to conquer? Or tame? Or tame? Cause sometimes I feel like it's more trying to conquer and tame a woman than really just chasing her. Like, they want what they feel like they can't have. And it's a little excitement for them. Like they're victims just a little bit. Like person matter. You yell or you raise your voice. I feel like they like that. Mm. She got a little bite to her.

[C]

It's so crazy. Cause I've worked to get away from that. But what I have learned in my older age, too, I do believe that men like mean women. And I do.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't care what the narrative is online. Cause this is not a male versus female conversation. We don't do the man versus woman no more. But I will say it's in. The proof is in the pudding. Just like women like assholes and it's the same thing, you know? But what I've learned, if I have to put on this facade, right, and be like, you know what? I'm gonna be a bitch to him so he can do what I want him to do, then this is not for me now, back in the day, I used to be okay with it. I cannot. I'm not a. Naturally I am. I can be a bitch. I can. I know that. But naturally, I do enjoy being nice and having fun. So if I have to start being bitchy to you, do I really want you around, though? So it's like, you can be bitchy and have your way, but that's too much. I want to have fun. Like how I feel with my friends. I have a good Time with my fucking friends. And we're nice and we're loving and we're. If you don't give me that feeling, honestly, I'm cool. I get why so many older women are choosing to be by themselves, though. Because we have to be a bitch in order to get things out of a man. As a half him. If I got to do all that, I'm cool.

[A]

I don't know. I be feeling like, what about that dick, though? I always feel like I understand.

[C]

I'm weak. I'm weak.

[A]

I always feel like I understand why women want to be single until I think about the fact that you ain't getting no dick.

[C]

That don't mean they're not getting no dick. Yeah, they can have a special friend. That's true. I do have Oprah been having a little friend for 40 years.

[A]

That's not her little friend.

[C]

That is her little friend. That's her little friend.

[A]

That's her man.

[C]

Legally, that's her little friend. That's her little friend. Legally, that's her man.

[A]

They been together. How you know? They might be common law married.

[C]

If they were common law. If they were common law married, then that would have came out a long time ago.

[A]

How would we know common law?

[C]

Oh, you did say common law.

[A]

Yeah, but if they were legally married, it's not like on paper. It's common law.

[C]

Common law.

[A]

We've been together for all this time, and we've decided, bitch, we married. That's really what common law marriage is. It's like, we. That's my husband, and I don't give a fuck if we didn't go say it in front of a pastor or we didn't sign no paperwork. We've been together for 20 years. That's my husband. And I'm gonna tell people that's my husband.

[C]

That's what common law marriage is. You're right. You're 100% right. But I just feel like she got.

[A]

A little friend that is her man, y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

But I love this. And tell me how y' all feel. Cause sidebar.

[C]

A little bit.

[A]

But I feel like black people, celebrities, can not tell people their business. Like, you have to keep people out of the loop of your business to really, like, become a superstar in the black community. White people, they really thrive by showing all of their business and telling people everything. I feel like one of the main reasons, like, one of the main allures about Oprah is that we don't know if anything about her personal life. Like, we know about her. Instead, me, we Know that that's been her man. Hello. Since the beginning of the time. Okay. So they were engaged, though they called each other spiritual partners. Spiritual partnership.

[C]

I got a spiritual partner.

[A]

They were engaged in the 90s. We low key. Married. They were engaged in the 90s. And they ultimately decided marriage wouldn't work for them, as their interpretations of the roles of husband and wife would have clashed with Winfrey's career and personal life.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

I think she just ain't trying to cut that check.

[C]

I think that, too. But that's true, though, because you're never gonna catch up to Oprah Winfrey. So let's not even try to put labels on it. So I'm not mad at that.

[A]

Yeah. I just feel like you gotta keep a little mystery to things. Like, that's why I'm saying, how do we know what's really going on between them folks?

[C]

We don't.

[A]

All we know is that they never been married. But we don't know how she been breaking him off or he been breaking.

[C]

I'm gonna break him off real bad.

[A]

We don't know. I don't know what they got going on.

[C]

I wanna make a point to what you were saying. Cause I talked about this on LoveLex P last week. So it's crazy that you said that because you said black people do not get the.

[A]

The luxury.

[C]

The luxury of telling all their business and being successful. Cause you can. But I'll tell you why, though. Because I feel like in the black community, if a black woman gets into a relationship and he ends up being a horrible person, and she has babies for this person, whatever, gets married, and it's like, ha, ha, I told you so. And you can literally get taken down just by being connected to somebody. Like, you can be married to a man who ends up being horrible. And then they'll connect you to him, even if you left him and you don't talk to him no more, they'll be like, well, he did this. You knew about it, xyz. But if any other race does, they'll be like, oh, my gosh. I know. She didn't know, y'. All. She's a single mother. Single mother in other races looks like, oh, she's so strong. She is powerful. Oh, my God. I cannot believe she's doing this on her own. Thank God they don't do that. But black women. Oh, she's a single mother. Where your baby daddy at? Oh, you must have left. You must have been annoying. You must have. It's such a different narrative.

[A]

Single mother is Baby mama for black women.

[C]

Yes. Immediately, there's a thing going on on TikTok right now. It was a girl. I don't know her name. She's a baseball wife. And she was talking about how she had to go to the hospital that she's having her first child at, and she was embarrassed because her husband couldn't make it. And she was like, I didn't want people to look at me like a single mother. So all the single mothers have been rallying up for her, against her. Like, how dare you say this? You don't know what it took to be a single mother. My husband passed or, you know, he cheated on me. I got a divorce. And they're like, you know, but it's like, damn, I wish people would do that for black women.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know what I'm saying? So you're 100% right. Oh, I know, because.

[A]

I'm just saying, y'. All. Y' all don't understand. I really be sitting and thinking about stuff, and I read a lot of books, and I just read a lot of articles and, like, be falling down black holes on Google, like, reading information. When you really think about it, like, one of the most successful families right now is the Kardashians. Like, they're super successful. They're billionaires, and they literally made so much money from just, like, showing everything to the world on their reality show. Like, they didn't hold nothing back. They didn't hold nothing back. They let us know. I mean, of course, I'm sure it's things that we still don't know because they do, to a certain extent, control the narrative. But they have put their lives on display for it's the white right and have become unarguably the most successful prominent family when it comes to, like, having a reality show.

[C]

Yes. Agreed.

[A]

Building an empire.

[C]

Agreed.

[A]

Then you think about people, like, for example, I was thinking about this the other day, like, and I love Young Jock because he came on the show. Young Jock is somebody that I know shout out to him. I fuck with him. I respect him. But Young Joc went on loving hip hop and, like, all his. And at one point, he was, like, unarguably one of the biggest rappers out. He ended up going on love and hip hop and showcasing his personal life and his business. And then people started feeling like they could play you to the point that, like, a nigga used you as the intro line to the hottest song of the summer in 2022, 2021. Whenever that was, you couldn't go nowhere and not hear that before I go broke.

[C]

Like, jock with that dog. Like, real.

[A]

Because I feel like in a black community, nobody take you serious. Once everybody knows your business, it's like, oh, like, don't nobody take that nigga serious. We know what's going on with him. And it knocks down your superstar level. Versus in the white community. I feel like they could do that and, like, it really, like, elevates you more versus over here. It knock you down a few notches. And I feel like one of the main reasons that Beyonce is who she is. Don't nobody know. We still don't know what happened in that elevator. Michael Jackson. Think about the fact that who y' all ever heard done said that they fucked Michael Jackson?

[C]

Dirty Diana. But who is Diana?

[A]

But who the fuck is Dirty Diana?

[C]

Who is Diana?

[A]

We still don't know who Blanket Mama is.

[C]

Ooh, we do. Who the hell is Billie Jean? Not his lover. Debbie. Who?

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I don't know.

[A]

Michael Wono. Anyway, did you ever see that video on My 600 Pound Life where the lady. What's her name? Lashonda? I don't know her name. The lady that be singing all the time, she be doing the birthday shout out.

[C]

Yeah, she was on 600 pound life.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, see, I didn't know where she came from.

[A]

That's where she came from.

[C]

Okay, okay.

[A]

And then she started doing the birthday songs and stuff, and it was like a clip from the episode that her mama was like. Cause don't no mother don't know mother want no big fat ass daughter. Why would you say that about your child? So now me and Shay kind of got this inside joke where we say that about everything.

[C]

What does this have to do with what we say?

[B]

Because.

[C]

Damn, Shreya, I done forgot what we was talking about. What was we just talking about? We was talking about Michael Jackson, and she was like, gone on.

[A]

Michael Jackson want no big fat ass Diana.

[C]

So this is what I. This is what I have to say. Cause we gonna wrap this. That's why I said here I had.

[A]

To get brought back. It's this drink that Ty gave me.

[C]

But no, I do agree with that.

[A]

That's why I love the solo episode.

[C]

Because that was a great comparison with Young Joc. I feel the same way. Y' all gonna get mad at me in the comments. Uh, oh, it's a drink.

[A]

What else is new?

[C]

Y' all gonna be mad about how they do watch Jazzy with Cam, right? I feel like they judge her off of her baby daddy and not who she is now. You may have what you think about Kim and things like that, but why are we. Cause are we judging Kim Kardashian off of Kanye? Cause if we talking about it, Kanye is way worse than Cam.

[A]

But he wasn't when she got with him.

[C]

I mean, I see where you're going, but Cam, the things that he says is just more so of like, you don't agree with how he runs his relationship. Kanye's political views and everything has been wild for a very long time.

[A]

He wasn't wrong, though.

[C]

Who?

[A]

On his political views.

[C]

Oh, when he. Back in the day, when he said George Bush doesn't care about black people, that's when he was.

[A]

And that's when we stood behind him. We was like, crazy, Will. Yeah.

[C]

But that changed really quick when he wore that MAGA hat. Things started getting a little weird. But I will say this, but at the end of the day, let me tell you what's gonna happen, though. Kim left Kanye, right? And we're still. Kim is still very successful. If Jazzy and Kim break up, she is not gonna get the same love and people rallying around her that Kim got. And I'm not wishing that on Jazzy and Kim. I'm not. That's what I'm saying. I'm agreeing with you. It's unfair.

[A]

Yeah. I 100% agree with you. You're not wrong. She not.

[C]

Cause she black. Exactly. That's literally.

[A]

Is. It's not fair. It's crazy. And so that's why, like. And the whole reason, like, I'm having this conversation with you is cause I conversation with somebody, and they was like, I feel like, you know, like, when we have conversations, I could really tell, like, your growth and how you look at things differently over the past three, four years and how you'll be like, oh, I probably shouldn't have been in this situation, or I handled this situation wrong. But they was like. But I feel like you don't really say that on Poor Minds. And I was like, I don't feel like I need to.

[C]

I think it shows, though.

[A]

I think it shows. But I also don't feel like I need to just talk about everything that goes on in my personal life on the show, because all I've ever seen is the do is be detrimental. Agree to the black people in the same space as us that's trying to do the same things as us. Letting people know too much of your business ain't never did nothing, in my opinion, but make you look crazy and not work in your favor. It's best to keep as much as you can to yourself and just let them see the personality and let them see what they're here for, the entertainment.

[C]

Yeah, I'm here to entertain. I am here to entertain.

[A]

My life don't need to be under a microscope, even if I do have to take the hard lessons. And I would love to be able to share more of that stuff with people, but unfortunately for us, we don't have the same grades. People are gonna scrutinize us.

[C]

All we can do is sit on the phone with each other and cry, bitch.

[A]

That's all. And that's what we do. And then we get on Poor minds and we act like shit.

[C]

All good. One thing, we gonna sit on this couch and be like, what's up, y'? All? We got to, though. Cause you right, we don't get that luxury. We don't.

[A]

And we gotta just always keep that in mind.

[C]

But you know what luxury we do get? We get a drink of the week. Ty, what we drinking?

[A]

Cause I be.

[C]

I like that.

[A]

Stuttering.

[C]

What we drinking?

[B]

I'm lit.

[C]

I'm over here.

[A]

Lit. Yeah, that's how I like it. All right, so we got some products around, so I was getting a little inside inspired. So we're gonna call this one her fantasy. All right, so you can have whatever spirit of choice. We got some tequila or vodka in these. We have some aperol. We have some elderflower liqueur, a little bit of lemon juice, some angostura bitters. And then I added a little bit of sparkling grapefruit on top just to give it a little bit of carbonation, a little bit of that effervescence to it. So it's kind of meeting like a little bit of bitter. But it's strong because we only got liquor the in. The only non liquor is the lemon.

[C]

Okay. This is really good. You like it because you know I don't like a sweet drink.

[A]

Yeah. And you like grapefruit.

[C]

Ooh.

[A]

So that aperol is giving it some of that grapefruit. Those grapefruit notes. I like Aperol.

[C]

This man about to get my fantasy box today. I can't wait to finish filming today. I'm not gonna lie to y'. All.

[A]

I'm trying to not be judgey.

[C]

Don't be judgy. I don't care. So I told y' all I love these wipes, right? I'm glad they sent us a box. I'm finna go wipe this thing off and go see my man.

[A]

I leave you.

[C]

I am. It's everywhere. Wipes too. You can do it everywhere. Booty hole, little fresh, everything. You got some creases.

[A]

That's what I love about it. And if you got time, if you can stop by a sink.

[B]

If you got.

[A]

You can use the refresh gel. I'm telling you, Lex clearly ain't got the time.

[C]

I don't got the time. Let's get to it. Let's get to it.

[A]

I be having time to stop me. You're making real Slim shady.

[C]

Hi. Oh, hi. They still commenting on that clip. But anyway, shout out to her fantasy box. Cause, baby, they be having me all the way together. That's why he can't stop blowing. Blowing up my phone.

[A]

She see me calling her.

[C]

That's how he be.

[A]

I whipped up in the driver. He be whipping up in your driver.

[C]

He too.

[A]

I believe it.

[C]

Ooh. Okay, let's move on. I ain't gonna lie.

[A]

This Gucci good And make me feel like.

[C]

Okay, topic two. So let me scroll my cards. You know, we professional. We got cards over here. What's an artist or a song that everyone loves but you absolutely hate and refuse to listen to? Okay. I think there's a lot of people these days that can speak out, but I think there's classic records.

[A]

Like what?

[C]

Like, more so classic records. Cause I don't like to get into the Stan wars. Like, we're not gonna do that. Like, people are like, oh, people love Beyonce. People don't like Rihanna. People don't like Cardi. They don't like Nikki. They don't like me. We're not talking about. Cause y' all don't like stuff because you don't like that person. And a lot of times, you won't like this artist not because you don't like them, but because you're a fan of the other person. Y' all opinions don't matter. We talking about. This song is literally two packs of ass. You know what song I'm finna say, and you agree with me? Closer to my dreams. That shit stinks. You're not getting closer to your dreams. You're actually about to fail. And I'm a hater, so I'm laughing. You're. I don't turn that shit off.

[A]

You ain't wrong, Queen.

[C]

Turn it off.

[A]

You ain't wrong. I hate every time I'm at a fucking party. Cause they be playing that shit at brunches and day parties. I be like, bitch, where the fuck is Domingo? Where the fuck.

[C]

His future?

[A]

Why are you playing? How do you go? Is it goopily?

[C]

Awesome. I thought it was Giapella. Giapelli. Giapelli. Giapelli.

[A]

I don't know, bitch. I don't know. All I know is don't play that shit at my brunch party.

[C]

And there's no shade to her. It just. And it ain't.

[A]

It's not. I swear to God it's not. But I just. Girl, people be like, I love to listen to this when I clean up my house. Well, bitch, that's you. I personally.

[C]

You play that, my house gonna be dirty as fuck.

[A]

I personally love to listen to a little bun bk my house. Okay, get down in there. Get down in them boards and them crib.

[C]

All I know is what I've been told. And that's a half truth is a whole lie.

[B]

For almost a decade, the murder of an 18 year old girl from a small town in Graves County, Kentucky went unsolved until a local homemaker, a journalist, and a handful of girls came forward with a story.

[C]

I'm telling you, we know Quincy killed her. We know.

[B]

A story that law enforcement used to convict six people and that got the citizen investigator on national tv.

[C]

Through sheer persistence and nerve, this Kentucky housewife helped give justice to Jessica Kerr.

[B]

My name is Maggie Freeling. I'm a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist producer, and I wouldn't be here if the truth were that easy to find.

[C]

I did not know her and I did not kill her or rape or.

[A]

Burn or any of that other stuff that y' all said. They literally made me say that I took a match and struck and threw it on her. They made me say that I poured gas on her.

[B]

From Lava for good. This is Graves County, a show about just how far our legal system will go in order to find someone to blame.

[C]

America, y' all better wake the hell up. Bad things happens to good people and small towns.

[B]

Listen to Graves county in the Bone Valley feed on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast and to binge the entire season ad free. Subscribe to Lava for Good plus on Apple Podcasts.

[A]

Black community is just gonna be so disappointing to me.

[C]

What is it?

[A]

That song by that man, I can't Stop loving you. I don't like that song.

[C]

Jarriah, you don't like Kim? I don't.

[A]

I didn't say I don't like Kim. I didn't say I don't like Kim.

[C]

Kim. Kim needs to put a caption on.

[A]

Kim is him.

[C]

Kim is him.

[A]

I don't like that song.

[C]

Okay, that's fair. That's fair.

[A]

I be so tired of it. Okay.

[C]

I'm not.

[A]

Especially with the older black community. Oh, girl, go rest. Take a nap.

[C]

Rest. Not forever.

[A]

Cause I mean, they in that age.

[C]

They tell them that. They don't take it literally.

[A]

They might not wake up.

[C]

Okay? Y' all gonna get mad at me for this. For real, though, when I'm in the club and they play this song, I get so mad cuz it's like, give it up. Delicious, man. I got this swag.

[A]

Oh, here y'.

[C]

All. I had matching my bag.

[A]

Cuz I'm a still swag.

[C]

Surf. I don't activate it. No, I hate it. I hate swag. Surfing the club.

[A]

You wild.

[C]

I can't. It just don't hit like it used to. For real.

[A]

I think they played it out.

[C]

It's too much.

[A]

I will do it.

[C]

I'm with you, Dre.

[A]

I'm still gonna do it.

[C]

I'm gonna do it because it is.

[A]

Like I'm a millennial. Yeah. That was our time to shine.

[C]

20.

[A]

When did that come out?

[C]

2011, 2012. It was a long time ago.

[A]

Yeah, I'm still. And they very nostalgic for me.

[C]

Yeah, I love it.

[A]

It's a mom me in time.

[C]

I can't. I can't get into it.

[A]

I have one. What you have. The black community is also going to hate me.

[C]

Oh.

[A]

Family Affair by Mary J Bl the hater Hol dance.

[C]

Hate it.

[A]

I thought you was going to say by them sisters. It's a family affair.

[C]

No, I like that you don't like.

[A]

Mary J. Blation and holleration in the dancery. I don't like it.

[C]

Oh, I can't agree with you on that.

[A]

Come on, everybody. Get on down.

[C]

I don't like.

[A]

They crunk up my.

[C]

Yeah, Then flip Them curls was bouncing in.

[A]

She influenced the generation with them flips.

[C]

I agree.

[A]

She birthed the nation.

[C]

She sure did.

[A]

Just like us.

[C]

But this is why I can't. I can't.

[A]

This is why I'm hyped. That's another one.

[C]

I turn that off. This.

[A]

See, that just made me think about that. This is why I'm hot. Turn it off.

[C]

What? This is why. This is why. This is why I'm hot. Shut up. I'm hot cause I'm fly. Cause you not. This is why.

[A]

This is why I'm hot.

[C]

That stinks.

[A]

But back then it was hard, okay? Cause don't act like you wasn't in your house. This is why. This is why. This is why I'm hot.

[C]

It Wasn't hot. It was giving room temperature. It wasn't hot at all.

[A]

That was a good song back in the day.

[C]

Okay, I'll give it to you back in the day. But, yeah, you was right. Shit was ass.

[A]

I just feel like, you know, it's a few songs that have just.

[C]

Okay, this is what I say. I see. Okay, so there's a thing. Y' all know I'm on TikTok heavily, so there's this trend going on right now, and people are, like, rapping to T Pains, Chopped and Screwed, and they're telling people what they're doing wrong. So there's this girl going back and forth with Lizzo, right? And what I've noticed is, like, a lot of people be, like, saying this about Lizzo's music, and they feel like, oh, I can't get into it. But y' all have to realize Lizzo makes music for her audience. And I think she does it well, because, you know, where a lot of artists mess up at is they start making music for their audience. They see success, then they want to start. Let me experiment. No, bitch, you're not ready to experiment. Keep feeding your audience. I'm pretty sure there's a lot of things we want to talk about on Poor Minds, but we gotta feed the audience. But we still have a fun time doing it. Feed the audience. You know what I'm saying?

[A]

So why is Lizzo going back and forth with this lady?

[C]

Cause the lady said that she was.

[A]

Offbeat and she going back and forth with her. Yeah, but she not.

[C]

Yeah, but it's funny. It's like a funny thing, and, like, they're going back and forth, and then people are like, are y' all flirting? It's kind of funny, though. But it's not, like a bad thing. But it's just like. I think y' all need to realize that sometimes some music isn't for you. This is the first time I've talked about music that I hate outside of Trey Songz and Eminem.

[A]

And you on your own with Trey Songz and Eminem.

[C]

Because we're not doing this again. We're not doing this again. We not doing this again. They been eating me up for months.

[A]

And they should, because you sound ridiculous. The only great take that you had today was gonna guapily.

[C]

First of all, that's the only thing. But let me clear the air. Let me clear the air right now for all the Eminem stans out there. I never said his music was always ass. I said it didn't age well. Meaning I liked it at one point in time. And the way your brain works that you remember things. So of course I'm gonna remember all the lyrics. Cause I used to sing the songs. Because when I was 12, it was hot Fi. Just like you said. This is why I'm hot. I know the words still because I was rapping it back then.

[A]

But you just tried to act like you wasn't.

[C]

But I was. I knew it. But at 36 years old, I'm just not listening to his music. We're not gonna clip this. All I'm saying is y' all been eating me up for months in my comments. Like, please give me a break. I said it was good at one point. It just didn't age well. You know what aged well? Song cry. I can't see it coming down my eyes. But I gotta let this song cry.

[A]

Cause that's relatable across all ages.

[C]

It's with the lyrics, the beat, everything, everything. It's timeless.

[A]

We still crying, Jay Z.

[C]

We still crying. Yes.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

So I can't drink no more of her Face look good.

[A]

Her Fantasy Palace. That's probably my favorite Jay Z song ever. That is mine too.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

You know what's funny is that you should do that when we have guests, when you be trying to get in the studio, but you don't ever do that. I don't know why you doing that for me. I can't get you no studio. Cause I don't wanna make a song.

[C]

With nobody but you.

[A]

And what I'm gonna do. Rap.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

I could wrap this.

[C]

That's what I'm saying.

[A]

You know, I love cook food.

[C]

You know, when gotta move, we gotta move on. We doing this again. We keep stretching. So now. Okay, so. But before we move on, let us know what is a song or a popular artist or a popular song that y' all just don't like. Let us know in the comments. I'm really interested.

[A]

I'm interested to know, too. I'm curious to know. Shout out to cocktails.

[C]

Yeah. Kiki and Cocktail. Y' all.

[A]

Make sure y' all go get that game. Now it's time to get into the bed. Bow the bee a bow the bed.

[C]

A bow, bow, bow, bow, bow. So this segment of the Bed is sponsored by. Of course, y' all see, her fantasy box is in the building with us. We have all their good products. I'm telling you, if that thing ain't as sweet as it should be, you need to go to her fantasy box. They gonna get you right?

[A]

I Mean literally everything. They have all type of washes. They have the refresh gel. They have the other yummy gel, which is good for when you know you about to get intimate. They got the everywhere deodorant, which is good to just, you know, make you smell good, freshen you up after the gym. I like to carry it in my gym bag personally. And then they also have the body splash oils. They have suppositories, they have chlorophyll pills. Anything that you need. Slippery box. Even if you're having problems getting wet.

[C]

Slippery. Excuse me.

[A]

Excuse me.

[C]

Y' all wanna know how I saved up my money to get this? I could use some of that tonight. That's what I'm saying. Hey, Gunna did his thing.

[A]

That's a great song.

[C]

It is too good. Yeah.

[A]

Who get tonight? This house.

[C]

And how I was able to stack up my money because I was wiping that thing down and giving them that.

[A]

Good stuff and getting close tonight.

[C]

I was getting tonight. Okay, so anyways, shout out to her fantasy box in the building. But for the bad topic today. Do you tell your girlfriends everything about your sex life? Like, some women tell every detail, right? Oh, his dick was small, his dick was big. It was good. He couldn't do it. He ain't have no rhythm. But other women just be like, mm. I'm not telling my friends that. Like, what makes you choose what friends you tell what to?

[A]

I don't know. I think for me it's just become a maturity thing. And I just feel like your friends don't need to know everything. But when I was younger, I didn't give a fuck. I used to tell my friends a lot of stuff just because at the end of the day, like, who cares? The reason to me why older women will tell their daughters and their nieces and stuff. Don't tell people your business because if you tell her how good his dick is or how good the sex is, she might steal your man up. One of my friends still in my man ain't never been a fear of mine, so I don't care about telling them my business. I'm not worried about that because I'm confident enough in myself, in my relationship with my man to know that, like, even if one of my friends did try some, my man ain't going. And I just got to cut you off because you're weird.

[C]

You're a weirdo.

[A]

But, like, that's just not a fear of mine. I feel like that's what friendship is for. Like, you supposed to share stuff with your Friends. I have had some funny ass conversations with my friends about sex. I have had some serious conversations. I have had some scary conversations. As far as, like, scary, like, pregnancy scares and stuff.

[C]

I thought you meant to put up a package.

[A]

No, like, no, bitch. Pregnancy scares and stuff. Like, I think we. Exactly. What the fuck be wrong with this, bitch?

[C]

What? Hey.

[A]

At least once an episode.

[C]

Hey, wait.

[A]

At least.

[C]

God damn it. You did it. You did it.

[A]

Cause what. But no, like, I feel like that is what womanhood is about. It's about sharing. It's about having conversations. I mean, I don't know. Ty, how do you feel? I agree. I feel like if you can't trust your friend, like, if you feel like your friend is gonna snake you or you don't want to share that information cause she's gonna use it against you, then that's really not your friend. Yeah. But I think I've learned a lot about sex and being comfortable with sex through having those conversations transparently with my friends. Like, ooh, what you doing?

[C]

How you sucked.

[A]

Cause I didn't know, like. Like, my mom didn't teach me that. Sometimes it teach you a little more. Like, your friends kind of walk you through that and you feel a little more comfortable to kind of explore and ask more questions.

[C]

I agree. I feel like there's never been a conversation. First of all, there's never been a conversation I've had with a friend. And she'd be like, oh, I this. And his dick was so good. And I'd be like, ooh, let me try it. Yeah, this ain't crab cakes. This is a man. What the are you talking about? What are we. You know what I'm saying? Like, it gets a little weird. I have never had a conversation.

[A]

You ain't wrong.

[C]

For real, though.

[A]

Like, I've never. It's not one size fits all.

[C]

I'm not like, oh.

[A]

Because also, what is good to you might not be good to me.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And am I really willing to mess up my friendship to test it out? No. Like, that's so weird.

[C]

Once you tell me that you have had sex with a man and y' all are dating and you really like him. Oh, he's off Rip. That's bro. Literally, like, that's. That's my bro. We ain't never. Don't say nothing weird. Don't do nothing weird, because I'm snitching. I'm a rat. Like, Draya's neighbor. I'm a rat. So I just think that it's never. If I don't share something with somebody that's my close friend that I've done sexually. It's not because I'm embarrassed. It's just like, ooh, I gotta sit her down. We gotta have a little tie drink before I tell her what I did.

[A]

No. Cause sometimes I done did some shit that's too freaky.

[C]

Yeah. Sometimes I get a little ashamed. I'm not gonna L. Something happened to me the other day that was so freaky. I said, you know what? I need to keep this to myself. I'm not ready to share this with the class yet. Yeah, I'm gonna share it with the class eventually, but I got to process this shit.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah, it went down. Sometimes it goes down. It goes down.

[A]

I don't know. To me, it's more about bonding and laughs, like, just having a good time, like, having conversations. We out, we having drinks, or we having a girl's night, and we just talking about our week. We talking about, girl, this is what I did last. I don't necessarily even feel like it's about bragging and stuff, because I do feel like some women. And that's when they get a little weird. Some women do be telling their friends up to be, like, braggy.

[C]

But how you bragging on dick is the easiest thing to get? Or freaky? Like, I don't know.

[A]

I feel like, do you think dick is easy to get? I feel like dick ain't good. Dick ain't easy to get. Quality dick ain't easy to get.

[C]

It's not. But what I'm.

[A]

Quality dick is.

[C]

Quality dick is not. But it has nothing to do with you as so you can be the shittiest woman in the world getting quality dick. You can be the best woman in the world getting trash dick. Some niggas got good dick and some niggas don't. They gonna give you the quality dick. Cause he just got some quality dick will be attached to the worst person in the world. So sometimes, see, when I think of.

[A]

Quality dick, I'm thinking more so about the person. Cause you like it's quality dick if it's attached to a quality person. And that's what I was.

[C]

Cause you like to make looks. Love. You talking about sweet, sweet love. That's what you talking about.

[A]

I mean, I done made love a few times.

[C]

Baby, let's get naked just so we can make sweet love. When's the last time you made love, girl? Like, two weeks ago, you was making sweet, sweet love. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, I'm ashamed.

[C]

I should be ashamed of it. Why don't be ashamed.

[A]

Because I shouldn't have. Because I backtrack.

[C]

Sometimes you got to make. Yeah, sometimes under the blue corn moon, bitch.

[A]

But then wait. Cause then now your feelings be all like. You be like, oh, my God, I love him again.

[C]

What?

[A]

I do.

[C]

Yeah, you never stopped. That's what's crazy about it. Sometimes when you make sweet love, you be like, oh, I love him again. It ain't again, bitch. It never stopped.

[A]

So what's too much to share? Like, kinks play by play.

[C]

Like, you don't need to tell me every little thing that he said and did, but you can tell me, like, there's a difference between being like, oh, girl, we had anal sex last night, versus, girl, we had anal. And then he stuck it in and it hurt and it started bleeding a little bit. Cause it cut my booty hole.

[A]

And I cheated on that sheet.

[C]

Yeah, you wouldn't have to tell me all that. Then I had to get her fantasy box and I had to wipe it up because, you know, the mess was. You ain't got to do all that. But you can give me a little. You know, we did anal last night. It got a little crazy, got a little messy. Yeah. But you don't have to go in specific details.

[A]

And from what I've learned from my married friends, they try not to embarrass their significant other. So if there's anything that, like, will portray them in a negative light, they usually keep that to themselves as private. And they just don't share all of that information, too, because that's how they protect their relationship.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. I think there's lines where it's, like, funny, and it's like, oh, ha ha. And then there's like, okay, you taking.

[A]

Shit too far makes me so good. I say, blah, blah, blah.

[C]

A work ass.

[A]

I need a glass of water.

[C]

And.

[A]

I'm just saying, like, I don't know.

[C]

I don't know.

[A]

I feel like if it's really your good friend and y' all are cool and you trust them, I don't necessarily feel like it's too much that you could tell. But, like, I do agree with Ty on the embarrassing part. Like, I would say nothing that's embarrassing.

[C]

Like, I think in a relationship till this, I don't care if you've been married for 10 years, 15 years, been in a relationship 10 years, 15 years, whatever. You're gonna still have some embarrassing moments in the bed. And it may be funny. Y' all may handle it different. But I don't need to tell y' all that.

[A]

So have y' all ever regretted sharing too much with your friends?

[C]

That's why I said what I said the other week when I was like, I don't know how to be a 50% friend and 100% friend. Thank God. I have never had a friendship that I'm in. No. Because my friends aren't weird. People are weirdos. People become friends with weirdos. They do. I have. I am so blessed by the grace of God. I don't have any weirdo friends. So everything that I share with y', all, it's like, ooh, girl, you crazy. And I never hear about it again unless I bring it up. They're not like, but, Lex, you remember when you told me you busted that booty hole because you was hungry? We ain't got to tell people, I needed some ramen noodles and a little burrito, bitch.

[A]

I thought that was between us.

[C]

It was between us.

[A]

Supposed to keep that.

[C]

You know what I'm saying?

[A]

In the family.

[C]

Well, you know. But that's why I can't surround myself with weirdos. I can't do it. Have you ever regretted sharing things with a friend?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. But you learned, though.

[A]

I did, but it was somebody I had to learn. Like, I be thinking, people be my friends, and they don't really be my friends. And I feel like that has come with wisdom and age. Like, at this point, I be knowing who my friends are and who I could tell certain stuff to and who I can't, just because we be having a good time together and you're a nice girl and, you know, we've been having good conversations and we've been friends for a few months. That don't mean I could really confide in you, like.

[C]

Right. I agree.

[A]

So, yeah, I have regretted it. Just because I told somebody something before and then they told, like, it got back to the man.

[C]

Now, that's a messy bitch who lives for drama.

[A]

Yeah. Ended up getting back to him. What I said, because she was just messy as fuck and she had her own personal, like, agenda.

[C]

I think I remember which situation you talking about.

[A]

Yeah, she had her own personal agenda with that situation. So, you know, it ended up not. But it didn't really matter that much because, I mean, we still kept with each other after that.

[C]

He said, I can't leave her alone.

[A]

Don't matter that she was talking about me and my dick.

[C]

You don't give a. He said, I know my dick bad. You ain't giving me no. See. Okay, moving on to the item of the week.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

I'm actually really excited about this item of the week.

[A]

Me too.

[C]

Because let me tell y' all something about me, Andrea and poor minds before we get into this, because we have entered a new era of doing, like, item of the weeks with different items. Cause this is what y' all have requested. Because every week we talk about, you know, either Muse Beauty or Richlook hair. And y' all were like, we wanna actually see some products. But the thing about it is we have to actually like the product if you're featured on the show. You know what I'm saying? So, like, every time y' all see us doing an ad, whether it's paid or not, these are products that we actually use and swear by. Because I think that I'm over that era of seeing influencers, podcasters, anybody, promote a product that they actually don't stand by. And I will say, this candle smells amazing. This is the newest collection by C. Freeman. And when I tell y' all that laundry day, life changing.

[A]

I love laundry day. And then I also love the fact that it's CBD infused. I feel like, you know, it's very calming. It brings a sense of calm over you and just like fills your house up, fills your space up. Cause right now we have it in the studio.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

And it smells amazing in here. Like, I wish that y' all could scratch this.

[C]

And it's. I'm telling y', all, it smells like laundry day. For real. Like, when I walk in my laundry room and I open that door, it's just like a burst of, oh, this smells so fresh and clean. That's what that smells like.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Now we have the satin sheets too. Satin sheets. All I know is what I've been told and that to have truth is a whole lie.

[B]

For almost a decade, the murder of an 18 year old girl from a small town in Graves County, Kentucky went unsolved until a local homemaker, a journalist, and a handful of girls came forward with a story.

[C]

I'm telling you, we know Quincy killed her.

[B]

We know a story that law enforcement used to convict six people and that got the citizen investigator on national tv.

[C]

Through sheer persistence and nerve, this Kentucky housewife helped give justice to Jessica Curran.

[B]

My name is Maggie Freeling. I'm a Pulitzer Prize winning journalist producer. And I wouldn't be here if the truth were that easy to find.

[C]

I did not know her and I did not kill her or rape or burn or any of that other stuff.

[A]

That y' all said. They literally made me say that I took a match and struck and threw it on her. They made me say that. Up for gas on her.

[B]

From Lava For Good. This is Graves County, a show about just how far our legal system will go in order to find someone to blame.

[C]

America, y' all better wake the hell up. Bad things happens to good people and small towns.

[B]

Listen to Graves county in the Bone Valley feed on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. And to binge the entire season ad free, subscribe to Lava for Good plus on Apple Podcasts.

[C]

Now we have the satin sheets, too. Satin sheets smells good. It smells good. But this laundry day, that's our fave.

[A]

Laundry day is our fave. But satin sheets is amazing as well. I feel like you can't go wrong with either scent. So y' all need to make sure that y' all go to homebyseefreeman.com get y' all candles.

[C]

Yes. Get you a candle. One thing about it, y' all know Drea's house is always extremely clean. My house is always extremely clean. But having a clean house with no smell good, it doesn't hit the same if you don't have candles in your house. I know you a temporary cleaning ass bitch.

[A]

Yeah. I love for people to walk in my house and be like, oh, it smell good in here. And they say that every time.

[C]

Every time.

[A]

You know why? Cause I got Home by C. Freeman. That's why.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And then they be like, now I feel like I want to take a little NAP. Yeah, that CBD.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah, I love it. Homebyseefreeman.com link is in the bio, y'. All. That's the item of the week. Go get y' all some candles. Support the business. This is a bomb ass candle.

[A]

And their Instagram is home. H O M E Underscore by C. Freeman.

[C]

Yes. Go follow them, y'. All. What we got next, Dre?

[A]

Okay, so now it's time to get into the box. So what you been listening to, Lex?

[C]

Oh, my gosh. So I'm so excited because y' all know we had Queen n' Jah on the show. And I'm not gonna lie, I haven't heard the song yet. So I'm maybe doing a pre bop of the week, but by the time this drops, it'll be out. But you know how sometimes you hear a snippet and you be like, I am so ready for this. I am so ready for this. So Queen N' Jah has a song dropping called Rain. And it sounds so good. It sounds so good. I think A lot of times people try to play with Queen because, you know, she did the YouTube. She was a content creator at first, but we forget how talented this woman really is. And when I tell y' all that snippet I heard, I cannot wait to hear the song. She looks good, too. Like, she has been posting, like, little clips of her, like, shooting the video. Y'. All. When y' all do rollouts, this is to all the artists, because I'm a music Stan. When y' all do rollouts, stop dropping music. With no video. Whenever she drops this song, the video is dropping too. When I hear a song, I wanna see the video, because what are you feeling? Cause how are you singing the song? Because the way you singing it may be different from the way I'm interpreting it. So I saw that she was shooting the video the other day. This is how you do a rollout. Let's bring back proper rollouts. Beyonce got y' all thinking that y' all can just drop music in the middle of the night. Mm. Y' all can't do what Beyonce do. Okay. Let's bring back proper rollout.

[A]

She gave us years of rollouts.

[C]

Years of rollouts.

[A]

Started just dropping music.

[C]

So by the time, like I said, this drops, hopefully I'll have heard the whole song. But I heard the snippet of Rain by Queen, and I'm really excited. I'm really excited for the drop. So. Okay, shout out to Queen Naja, girl, you know we love you over here.

[A]

We do. So.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

So Mariah the Scientist came out with a new album.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Heart Soul Separately. And I like the album as a whole. I feel like it's a good album. But my favorite song is Easy to Cry featuring Kelly Uchi.

[C]

Does she sample Sade?

[A]

I'm not sure. That's a good question.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I don't really know. Okay.

[C]

Cause, you know, shot together. Is it a crime?

[A]

Oh, no, no. She doesn't sample that.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

That's just the name of the song.

[C]

Okay. Okay.

[A]

But I'm like, I don't know. Because, you know, sometimes the way people sample stuff, you can't really necessarily tell right off the rip, but I don't think so.

[C]

Okay. Okay.

[A]

But, yeah. So is it a crime? Mariah the Scientist, Inc. Cali uches. It's such a good song. Like, it's for the real lovers. It's for the real lovers. You gonna listen to it and be like, oh, my God. At one point in my life, I remember feeling this way about a man. Cause men will really take you down through There. And I feel like Mariah the Scientist does a really good job of capturing that. And like, her pen game is crazy. You have to really listen to the words or really even go sometimes read the lyrics of her song and see what she really saying. Because, yeah, she really is a voice for the girls. But it's a good song. I really like it.

[C]

You can't play with Mariah the Scientist pen. You can. It's very deep, and it's deeper than what people realize.

[A]

And I think her music career is gonna go very far. But even, like, at one point, if she decides that she doesn't actually want to be an artist anymore, she has a very promising career being like a writer and a producer.

[C]

I agree. Remember how the dream we not gonna tell them words. It be the words. It be the words.

[A]

Some people just know how to put words together in such like an eloquent way.

[C]

Like the way I put whole ass nigga together. Okay. And it just flows off the tongue. It'll make you feel something. Yeah. It don't hit me.

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

Okay, I hear you, but you don't feel me.

[A]

I mean, you know, I just feel like, ho ass nigga. That's so.

[C]

But it ain't like. Cause this got different. Whole ass.

[A]

Okay. Cause you playing, but you be saying ho ass.

[C]

But that's. I'm in a different mode. All right? Ho ass.

[A]

That's how you always say it.

[C]

But it depends what day you catch me on. See, you ain't caught me.

[A]

On a good day, you can't say ho ass in a nice way. You can't be like, aha, ho ass. Like, it's no nice way to.

[C]

It is a nice way to say. Cause you know how I be like, please, ho ass. You a whole ass nigga.

[A]

And you see how my face just got straight.

[C]

You didn't feel like I really meant you was a hoe ass nigga.

[A]

I don't know. Somebody called me a whole ass nigga, I'mma take it personal.

[C]

You a whole ass nigga. If I said it like that, you wouldn't think I'm mean.

[A]

For real. It's three bad words. Ho ass and nigga.

[C]

You right.

[A]

That's like a triple insult.

[C]

You right.

[A]

Like when somebody say just one word, bitch, you right.

[C]

You right. All right.

[A]

Bitch, you crazy. You a hoe. Ho ass nigga. That's like bitch ass nigga. That's three insults.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

And in a way, you said you be like, debo ass.

[C]

No, I don't say bitch, ho ass Hoe ass. Cause be hoe ass niggas for real.

[A]

Freaky ass.

[C]

Freaky ass for real. You was 69.

[A]

Go be freaky ass.

[C]

Damn N be freakin. What is wrong with y'? All? I had a man, I had a block this morning on Instagram. I don't even know you. Why are you sending me pictures of your penis? Literally full fledged? I'm just opening. Like, I like to open my messages. Like, I just. Cause I like to respond to people. I am an engaged person. But honestly, I'm getting to the point to where, like, I can't even talk to y'. All. Cause what am I opening? Why would you do that? That's disrespectful. It's disrespectful. Cause I beat your ass when I see you don't get it. Oh, ass nigga. I fights niggas, baby.

[A]

He said, you need to see this meat. I'm gonna bring it to your front doorstep, bitch. Ew. You gonna see this, bitch.

[C]

Shut up.

[A]

I know you want this dick.

[C]

That was a good song. Oh, oh.

[A]

Who had the best verse? Don't ask me that.

[C]

Damn. Cause Kendrick and Drake was going bar for bar.

[A]

I feel like Drake's verse was better, personally.

[C]

Ok. It was a great song, though.

[A]

But what do you think?

[C]

I think that it was a great song. What do you think? Girl song Kendrick lumma AKA to me. Just so you like Kendrick's verse.

[A]

I respect that.

[C]

Okay, moving on.

[A]

So y' all know it's time to get into our favorite segment of the show, which is pour your heart out.

[C]

Out.

[A]

You know, if you have any questions, you can always send them to ask for minds gmail.com, that's a s k P O U R M I N D s Gmail.com Send us your questions, send us your testimonials because I feel like we haven't got a testimonial in a long time.

[C]

All right? Doing something bad, like giving bad advice or somebody be like, you messed up my life.

[A]

But maybe that's a testament to our growth because we don't be people life up no more. We've been giving them advice.

[C]

We know a little something we done grew.

[A]

All right, question number one. Hey, ladies. I dated a guy from work and things didn't work out. We broke up his call last April on the 4th. He married someone else this year, ironically, on the 4th of April. And unfortunately we still see each other once a week. I've cut ties with him since he got married, but we recently went out to celebrate One of our colleagues. Farewell. And he was quite flirtatious with me. Me. This is the second time we've interacted since he got married. And both times he's. He's been flirtatious. This time, though, I realized I'm still very much in love with him. I don't know what to do, to be honest. I want to move on, but haven't been able to date since we broke up. I cannot seem to get over this person. And I feel like that part of my life is still at a standstill.

[C]

You want him more because he's married, and because you can't have him, you don't really love him. It's a we want what we can't have type of thing. Y' all stop talking for a reason. And we tend to romanticize everything, especially women. Men do this too. But I can only speak from a woman's standpoint. Obviously, you don't want this man. You just want him more because you feel like he's off limits. And I think that that's something that you have to work on internally to understand why, you know, we need to start wanting things that are for us, that God sent to us. This is not sent by God. This is not a situation that you wanna be involved in. He's married. Yeah.

[A]

And I feel like you also gotta keep in mind, it's something to be said about you dating somebody first and then them marrying someone else. So I feel like if you was the choice, if you was the person he wanted to be with, he would've chose you. And to me, that would be enough peace for me to be able to move on from a situation. It's just knowing, like, you chose. You could've chose me, but you chose to be with somebody else. Cause you said it was his call that y' all broke up, and then he ended up getting with this other girl, marrying her within a year. He never wanted you like that. So I just would move on and get over it. I know that sounds a little harsh, but I mean, sometimes as women, that's what we have to do because he's clearly moved on. And of course men are gonna flirt. Flirting is, like, low key, harmless, in my opinion.

[C]

It depends on who it is. I think that it's harmless. I do agree with you on that. But some people feel like that's overboard. But I also think it's also breadcrumbs. I think you're taking his flirting as something deep when he probably is not even thinking about the conversation that he had. Cause a lot of Times, people will think you're being flirting and you're really just being nice.

[A]

It's just your personality.

[C]

Exactly. So was he really flirting or was he being nice? But when you like somebody, somebody be like, oh, hey, how you doing? You look nice today. And you be like, oh, my God.

[A]

Girl, he want me so bad.

[C]

He want me so bad, bitch. Like, he on my dick whole time. Whole time.

[A]

Like he was being.

[C]

You know what I'm saying? So I think it's like, I don't really know what that flirting was, but it could be that he was seriously flirting. But either way, flirting is breadcrumbs. Cause like Draya said, it's harsh to say, but he didn't choose you.

[A]

He didn't. And he could have, right?

[C]

He could have and he didn't. So I think the best thing you can do is move on.

[A]

And marriage is permanent. Like, a n picks somebody to be they wife, and he like, oh, I'm gonna marry her. He really sure that he don't want you. He making it.

[C]

Am I wrong? It can't get clearer.

[A]

It can't get clearer. Like, I'm legally binding myself to this person. And I don't know what y' all know about divorces, but, like, getting divorced is not necessarily an easy process. So, like, for somebody to be like, oh, I'm gonna marry this woman, he's clearly making it very plain and simple to you that, like, she the one and unite, Right?

[C]

I agree.

[A]

Unite. So just let it go, sis. A little flirting here and there. That don't mean shit. Cause he. He probably would even fuck if you let him. That don't mean he gonna leave his wife, though.

[C]

Mm. All right, so question number 10. You know what, Todd, before we wrap this up, let me get another shot. Come on over here, girl. Get over here.

[A]

I knew you was gonna say that, but ditto.

[C]

I was exclusive with a guy for six months. It was a messy situation because he was my ex's a, but I was still talking to my ex. Anyways, after six months, I got a hey girl text, and basically, he was doing the same shit as he was with me and her, and she gave me all the receipts and everything. However, he got mad and blocked her and said he just wants to be with me and he doesn't know why he did that. Maybe he's sick. Should I leave him? I don't know if he cares or leave it. Since we're not properly together.

[A]

I just feel like, what be wrong with people? Like, how do y' all be just dating People for so long and not setting boundaries.

[C]

I agree.

[A]

I need to know whether we together or not asap.

[C]

And I also think. Oh, go ahead.

[A]

Well, I was just gonna say, I feel like knowing that will naturally prevent a lot of things from happening. Like, if you and this person are sure that y' all are solidified and y' all are in a relationship, and this is what it is, and this is what we doing. It's my man. I'm his girl. A lot of, like, it won't be so much gray area, and you won't have to wonder, because, I don't know. In that situation, I kind of feel like, is he wrong if y' all ain't really together? Not really.

[C]

Agreed. And also, it's been six months. I just feel like you don't know somebody in six months, but you should at least know what you want and what you want to build towards. Yeah. And I feel like six months is still the honeymoon stage. Why are y' all going through mess in the first six months? Like, that should be the blissful. Oh, my God, he's so perfect still. So I would say move on and let it go personally.

[A]

Me, too.

[C]

Cause I don't.

[A]

I don't necessarily think he wrong. Y' all not together. It's never been put on paper, concrete, that. Like this, my man. So. Yeah.

[C]

Cause I let it be known.

[A]

Well, you be making assumptions. What the old people say, make an.

[C]

Ass out of you and me when you assume. No, that's right.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Let's close this out with a shot.

[A]

Before we take the shots. Before we take the shots, make sure y' all subscribe to our Patreon. We drop Poor Chronicles every single Monday on Patreon. Make sure y' all subscribe to the channel. Make sure that y' all subscribe. Select YouTube channel and watch Love Lexp every Monday. You can subscribe to my YouTube channel, but I'm trying to figure out what I want to do with this.

[C]

Why would you say you can? You figuring out it's coming. Yeah.

[A]

I don't know. I'm trying to figure out what I want to do. I don't know if I want to still vlog. I'm trying to figure it out, but I do appreciate the 15k subscribers that we do have.

[C]

Yes. And you're doing amazing. I think the vlogs are interesting, but sometimes you got to pivot. Pivot. You know? I mean, we pivoted a lot with poor mind.

[A]

Yeah, we did.

[C]

So that's all right. You got to take your time and Figure it out, period.

[A]

And shout out to muse. Beautycollection.com. make sure you get your lip glosses, lip liners, matte liquid lipsticks. We have jelly blushes. We have mascara. We have eyeliner. We are really expanding. So make sure you go support a small black business that ain't gonna be that small for much longer.

[C]

I know that's right.

[A]

Yeah. Taylor port.

[C]

Taylor port.

[A]

Shout out to Taylor her fantasy vibe, her fantasy box.

[C]

Yagi world.

[A]

Yagi world, y'.

[C]

All. And if you don't want to subscribe to YouTube because you like short form content, y' all make sure y' all follow me on Facebook and Snapchat. My Snapchat is lexp05. I have a series right now going on called Lex P tv. So I'm updating my house and showing y' all all my renovations. So I know a lot of y' all be nosy and all that good stuff. So I'm renovating my house. So make sure y' all follow me on Facebook and on Snapchat. Lexp05. And I think that's it. Now let's take this shot.

[A]

Let's take this shot.

[C]

And shout out to just being beautiful, black and proud.

[A]

Say it loud. And shout out to so meeksy.

[C]

And shout out to so mixy in the building, period. We'll see y' all next week, y'. All. Yeah.

[A]

Oh, Monday you and your man had an argument Y y' all always arguing about something. That Tuesday morning your daughter had you late for work and you gotta deal with your boss. And then on Wednesday your sister says she ain't gonna babysit on Thursday and it's her seventh time flaking on you. But you look forward to Friday because you know when you get home gonna be there. Cause I'm your weekend lover you don't have Come on. Cause I'm your weekend lover.

[C]

Set the.

[A]

Phone and whatever you got on is coming off yeah, I'll pick you up I'll lay you down from Fridays and Saturdays you need me around cause I'm your weekend lover so go ahead and sleep in and I'll make sure you have a good weekend relax now Imma run that bubble bath you could put your feet up feet up don't you worry about a thing the babies at your mama's house got a hundred candles and roses Baby, I ain't playing no games Sip on this mo at mimosa sit down on the sofa while I cook you a meal hey and when we're done we'll go and have some fun in the bedroom Cause I know you looking forward to your weekend lover you don't have to call I'll be at your door when you get home Cause I'm your weekend lover Please don't answer the phone and whatever you got on is coming off yeah White house I pick you up, I lay you down Fridays and Saturdays you need me around Cause I'm your weekend love.

[C]

Go.

[A]

Ahead and sleep in and I'll make sure you have a good weekend yeah like the queen that you are Cause you deserve it girl says you deserve it girl hope you know this to me you a superstar I met your service girl wanna be a servant baby let's sneak up we'll have a go.

[C]

And get away Just close your eyes.

[A]

So you don't have to leave your place I'll be your comfort, you won't need another Cause I'll give you everything you need girl I'm your weekend lover you don't have to call I'll be at your door when you get home as I'm your week in love up answer the phone and whatever you got on is coming off girl I pick you up, lay you down.

[C]

Meet me.

[A]

Around Cause I'm your weekend lover so go ahead and sleep in and I'll make sure you have a good weekend.

[C]

In how make sure you have a good weekend? Exactly. Have a good weekend. Sam.

[B]

The murder of an 18 year old girl in Graves County, Kentucky went unsolved for years until a local housewife, a journalist and a handful of full of girls came forward with a story.

[A]

America, y' all better wake the hell up.

[C]

Bad things happens to good people and small towns.

[B]

Listen to Graves county on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts and to binge the entire season ad free. Subscribe to Lava for Good plus on Apple Podcasts. Short on time but big on true crime.

[A]

On a recent episode of the podcast.

[B]

Hunting for Answers, I highlighted the story of 19 year old Lachey Dungey.

[A]

But she never knocked on that door. She never made it inside.

[B]

And that text message would be the.

[A]

Last time anyone would ever hear from her. Listen to Hunting for Answers from the Black Effect Podcast Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. This is an iHeart podcast.