Grown and Sexy ft. Ari Lennox

Summary

Pour Minds Podcast: “Grown and Sexy” ft. Ari Lennox

Date: March 27, 2026
Hosts: Lex P and Drea Nicole
Guest: Ari Lennox, Singer & Songwriter
Network: The Black Effect Podcast Network & iHeartPodcasts

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Episode Overview

This lively episode welcomes the acclaimed R&B singer Ari Lennox for a funny, unfiltered conversation about self-love, body confidence, music, dating, and embracing the "grown and sexy" era of life and womanhood. From gym talk to BBLs, plane etiquette to sex positivity, and wild DMs to navigating relationships, it’s a candid and eclectic “drunk therapy” session for single, thriving 30-something women.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Welcoming Ari Lennox (05:19)

• The hosts gush over Ari’s presence, her snatched waist, and how much her music means to them.
• Quick banter about body image, weight loss, and the journey of self-care since turning 30:
  • Ari: “It was something about turning 30... I weighed myself and said, ‘Wow,’... I started running for my life.” (06:33)
  • Discusses finding a healthy balance with fitness and realizing small, consistent progress matters.

2. Ari’s Background: Growing Up & Early Music Dreams (09:02)

• Ari shares her DMV (DC/Maryland/Virginia) roots, school-hopping to escape drama, and early talent shows (“I would leave each school every time I was about to get jumped!” — 09:42).

• Reflects on bullying, using tears as a defense mechanism, and why she focused on her dreams anyway.

  • Ari: “That’s why it’s so important to follow your dreams. Because you really could make it doing the unthinkable.” (11:34)

• Talks about always singing in church, sharing dreams openly, and the support (and shade) she received.

3. Defining Her Sound & Genre Labels (15:42)

• Ari discusses how her style blends neo soul, R&B, alternative sounds, pop, and jazz.
  • She openly shares: “I have big dreams. I love all kinds of music—Red Hot Chili Peppers, Nickelback...” (16:14)
• Lex and Drea break into song with her (Nickelback and Paramore), highlighting the trio’s musical range and nostalgia.

4. Navigating Labels: Neo Soul & Industry Realities (19:11)

• Conversation about the “neo soul” label—its origins as a way for the music industry to sideline Black artists, marketing budget disparities, and embracing or rejecting labels.
  • Ari: “Now I’m just like, I don’t care. It’s an honor to be received in this way... Badu, Jill Scott, D’Angelo... it’s a long list.” (19:27)
  • She loves being part of the lineage.

5. The New Album: Vacancy — Embracing the Grown & Sexy Era (20:28)

• Ari on her inspiration: “Just... niggas, you know. Being in and out of my whole soul and also being comfortable in that space of being alone... luxuriating and enjoying my me time.” (20:36)
• Discusses sensuality, freedom, and finally owning “grown and sexy,” which once scared her.

6. Aging, Confidence, and Industry Pressures (21:31)

• Talking about the fear (or lack of fear) of turning 30:
  • Drea: “I was so terrified to turn 30... I thought my life was halfway over.”
  • Ari: “I never had that fear... I was like a puppy, super aloof... then something happened and I was like, oh shit, I have to grow up.” (21:56)
• How entertainment pressures youthfulness, but real life gets better after 30.

7. Songwriting and Creative Control (27:38)

• Ari explains her writing process is about being present, usually sparked by beats and moments—not stockpiling lyrics.
  • She gives an example of the song “Pretzel”: “Not even necessarily a situation or a man. ‘Cause nobody has been flipping and folding me.” (29:12)
• Shares frustration with fans’ mixed responses to her experimentation: “‘Smoke’—I wanted to punch a bitch, and people were like, ‘This is civil rights music!’” (30:48)
• Ari vows to stop seeking validation: “People really don’t know what they want. I have to lead.” (31:24)

8. Poor Decisions Segment (34:22)

• The hosts and Ari share humorous recent “poor decisions.”
  • Drea: Pulling a muscle at the gym by skipping stretching (35:08)
  • Lex: Getting too drunk in Miami and missing plans (37:06)
  • Ari: Wildest story—getting so drunk she passed out at the airport and got wheeled into a Detroit hotel (38:47), and another time getting locked up in Amsterdam due to alcohol-fueled emotions.
  • Ari: “I genuinely feel like looking back on all the arguments I’ve ever had...it was the liquor that made everything worse.” (39:31)

9. On Leaving a "Good Man" & Single/Successful Women Discourse (43:37)

• Analyzing public judgment about women leaving relationships, especially “good men.”
  • Ari: “I don’t know this man...people are so self-righteous and delusional.” (44:13)
• Discussing manipulation with religion/God in relationships, the “American Dream,” and why women are no longer settling.
  • Ari: “People are single for different reasons and it’s best that we are healthy while we’re single.” (50:29)
• Highlights double standards: men in their 40s single = in their prime; women = “damaged.”

10. Dating as an Independent, Successful Woman (52:03)

• Ari: “I thought it would be attractive...none of them would ever talk about how exciting it is that I’ve invested in properties...all my accomplishments were minimized.”
  • Admits independent, successful women often intimidate men, who’d rather their partners have fewer achievements.
• How men in and out of the industry see only “Ari” the artist, not “Courtney” the person (54:38).
• Discusses being cautious about truly connecting and not settling.

11. Astrology, Signs, and Relationship Red Flags (56:03)

• Banter about Pisces men (“love bombers...batshit crazy”—56:29), emotionality in dating, and recognizing repeating astrological patterns in relationships.

12. Plane Etiquette & Traveling Fears (64:34)

• Ari confesses a love/hate relationship with flying, rooted in anxiety and watching too many crash documentaries.
  • “Sometimes I’m like, whatever...other times I’m shaky...but I haven’t screamed in a long time.” (65:36)
• Lively debate about kids on planes (“babies are angels, they protect us”—66:28), drunk plane rides, class upgrades, and unspoken plane rules (headphones and quiet, please!).
• Lex: “Don’t get too, too turnt on the plane!” (73:38)

13. Body Confidence & Plastic Surgery (75:01)

• Lex jokes about her BBL (Brazilian Butt Lift) and breast reduction for confidence, not male attention.
  • Ari: “I will never get my boobs done in my life...sometimes boobs should just hang the way they’re supposed to.” (77:41)
• Discussion on expectations, fashion struggles for big-breasted women, and why some surgeries are more about comfort than looks.

14. Sexual Wellness & Product Segment (88:39)

• Product plug: Salt XO feminine wellness line.
• Candid conversation about personal hygiene routines and feminine care products.
• Playful bragging about keeping it fresh (“Let me tell you, your coochie right now is probably a 9.5...it’s gonna take it to a 10, baby.” — 91:33)

15. Sex, Orgasms, & Emotional Release (92:51)

• Serious/real talk about crying after climaxing, the emotional and physical sides of orgasm:
  • Drea: “It was the first time I climaxed from penetration. So it was a moment worth crying for.” (98:27)
  • Ari: “Will it ever happen for me?...I’ve never felt a full-blown orgasm the way I feel like, getting head or pleasing myself.” (98:48)
• Consensus: Emotional connection is almost always required for orgasm through penetration; porn is misleading.

16. Dating Advice: Dating Rappers, “Bums,” and DM Games (110:20)

• A listener question about “keeping” a rapper leads to spirited advice:
  • Ari: “If they were supposed to be together, they would’ve been together. You chasing him. He is NOT the prize, girl. You are.” (111:59)
  • Discourage women from chasing men—let them show intent and effort first.
• Another listener calls about messing with someone for 4 years “who’s a bum...takes perks...” The hosts and Ari emphatically advise: Drop him.
  • Ari: “Energy is transferable...stop giving them that ass.” (116:24)

17. Bops of the Week & Musical Nostalgia (104:29)

• Ari: Nostalgic R&B (“My body all over your body” by LSG)
• Hosts: Ari’s “Pretzel”; TI’s “Let Em Go”
• Nostalgic shoutouts to Keith Sweat, Cut Close, and the power of classic R&B playlists.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Ari Lennox: “People really don’t know what they want. I have to lead.” (31:24)
• On Single Women: “People are single for different reasons, and it’s best that we are healthy and why we’re single.” (50:29)
• On “Good Men”: “You don’t know my relationship...people are so self-righteous and delusional.” (44:13)
• On Chasing Men: “He is NOT the prize, girl. You are.” (111:59)
• On Plane Etiquette: “If you don’t know how to travel, get out the way.” (67:39)
• On Body Confidence: “I will never get my boobs done in my life…sometimes boobs should just hang the way they’re naturally supposed to.” (77:41)
• On Orgasms: “Will it ever happen for me?...I’ve never felt a full blown orgasm [from penetration].” (98:48)
• Lex on Drunken Confidence: “Do y'all know who the fuck I am? You hoes gonna stop playing with me!” (74:27)
• On Hygiene: “You gotta be able to clean them like a pancake.” (76:53)
• On Dating Standards: “I want to laugh all day with my boo…but am I allowed to have that from a secure energy?” (59:38)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Welcoming Ari & Body Confidence: 05:19–07:04
• Upbringing & Bullying Stories: 09:02–12:44
• Genre, Sound & Neo Soul: 15:42–20:28
• Vacancy Album Inspiration: 20:28–21:31
• Aging in the Industry: 21:31–27:17
• Songwriting Process: 27:38–32:44
• Poor Decisions Segment: 34:22–43:37
• Leaving a "Good Man"/Judgment: 43:37–54:38
• Industry Dating & Emotional Availability: 54:38–61:14
• Plane Etiquette & Flying Fears: 64:34–73:38
• BBLs, Breast Reductions, and Self-Love: 75:01–78:57
• Sexual Wellness Chat: 88:39–92:51
• Orgasms & Emotional Release: 92:51–103:53
• Listener Letters (Dating Rappers & “Bums”): 110:20–116:58
• Closing Shenanigans: 120:06–end

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Final Thoughts

In true Pour Minds fashion, the episode is a rollercoaster—warm, unapologetically honest, and filled with hilarious, relatable hot takes on all things womanhood, love, friendship, confidence, and the music grind.
Ari Lennox’s openness about her journey, boundaries, and self-acceptance is both empowering and disarmingly funny, making “Grown and Sexy” a standout episode for anyone finding joy in their thirties—and learning to put themselves first.

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Connect with Ari Lennox:

• Instagram & official site: arilennox.com
• Catch her on tour: Vacancy Tour
• New album: Vacancy (out now)

Host info:

• Lex P: @lex_p
• Drea Nicole: @drea_nicole

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“Let them come to you. Let’s go back to being women!” — Ari Lennox (113:26)
“If you can only do the Ari split, you can’t be putting your legs behind your head...” — Lex P (105:15)

Transcript

[A]

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[C]

I love all kinds of music. Nickelback.

[A]

Every time I see it makes me laugh.

[C]

Every minute when I'm walking through the back door, Hard to see it. And I would leave each school every time I was about to get jumped.

[A]

Why are you the one to fight jumps?

[C]

Yeah, I always everyone off my whole life.

[A]

Are you serious?

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

That sound like me.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Girl, I sold this shirt that said freakily in middle school. Yes. Do you drink on a plane?

[A]

Do I? Oh, I'm drinking in the Uber on the way there. I do not like either when people don't know how to travel. You taking too long in the line. Do I have to empty out my pockets?

[C]

That's me. Girl, I'm nervous.

[A]

You nervous? Take your over there.

[B]

I think I need a nervous, nervous one.

[A]

I'm not dating a five' five man.

[C]

Oh, I could totally date a five' five.

[A]

But you're not.

[C]

Because I've seen some fine, beautiful men, like, short men.

[B]

Being a little angry.

[C]

No. This one.

[A]

Oh, yep.

[C]

Wash the with this. And wash my heel attacks.

[A]

We can't smell it or nothing. I didn't smell your.

[C]

That's what you asked me. Thank you.

[A]

Let me tell you, your right now is probably at a 9.5.

[C]

It's at a 10. Baby. You didn't make me take off my underwear.

[A]

Oh, I was all right. What's up, y'? All? It's your girl Lexplo.

[B]

And it's your girl Draya Nicole.

[A]

And you are tuned in to another episode of Poor Mind where a drunk

[B]

mind speaks sober thoughts.

[A]

We got a guest today. We got a guest today. Now, I know y' all be on my ass talking about I be lying, but I am not lying this time. Cause y' all have been asking for this person to come through. And we were finally able to make it happen. This woman is a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful soul. We are always jamming to her music in the room. We trying to get a little vibe out. Whatever you got going on. We have the beautiful singer, songwriter Ari Lennox in the building. Hi.

[C]

Hey.

[A]

Hey, girl.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

It's good to see you too.

[B]

You look so beautiful.

[A]

You do look so cute.

[C]

So do you. Y' all fly as hell.

[A]

Thank you. Thank you, girl. And let me say this. Cause I'm not gonna lie. I was mesmerized when you walked in. I'm not trying to be weird.

[D]

You.

[A]

Your waist is so tiny.

[B]

It is. Thank you.

[A]

It's snatched.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

The waist is missing.

[C]

I'm hungry.

[A]

You are?

[C]

Yeah. You don't look hungry.

[A]

You look very, very good. Cause I know, like, you lost a lot of weight. Like, not recently.

[C]

I'm not saying.

[A]

Well, no, I'm not trying to say that. I'm just saying, like, I remember, like. Cause you were always fine, but, like, you popped out and it was like, God damn, she been in that gym.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

And you look amazing. You're glowing.

[C]

Thank you. So.

[A]

You just look good, girl.

[C]

It was something about turning 30. I started paying attention to my. Like, I've never have before. And I weighed myself and I said, wow. Wow. Like, this wasn't what I weighed in high school. I swear. I never weighed myself, ever. And I looked and I saw that number, and I just. I started running for my life.

[B]

Oh, you were.

[A]

You were a runner?

[C]

Oh, I started running, walking, teaming up with different trainers and all kinds of things. Yeah, yeah. Now I'm getting back into it again.

[A]

You look amazing. You do.

[B]

How much? Like, how many miles do you run a day?

[C]

So. Oh, definitely. Definitely not a day.

[A]

She said, hold on.

[C]

I would like to get there. But a few times a week, I like to run 20 minutes straight and do about three miles or two miles of cardio. No, at least three miles of cardio in general.

[B]

Yeah, that's really, really good, girl. I cannot run 20 minutes straight to save my life.

[C]

Oh, really? No, you can do it.

[B]

I probably can. I just have to condition myself.

[C]

Right. Exactly. So it starts off with, like, five minutes. And then you'll realize once you're at five minutes, I could go five more. I could go five more. Unless you really can, like, stop, pause. But yeah, it gets easier.

[B]

Yeah, that's what I try to do. I try to do five minutes. Like, I'll run, then I'll walk five minutes, run, then walk five minutes.

[C]

And that's better for you anyway. It's a hiit workout at that point, you know?

[A]

Oh, y' all professionals in that gym. Oh, she doesn't care. Taking my pictures.

[C]

I was here. That's all I got. I do that, too. Yes.

[B]

You gotta get the peaky.

[A]

Are you the kind of person. Cause obviously you're a singer as well. Like, when you get on the treadmill or whenever you're running, you, like, sing while you do it to help with your breath.

[C]

No, no.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[C]

I need to, though. Cause I be out of breath. I'm a walrus on the stage. But, yeah, at the gym, there's people around, so that would be really weird to be. Baby. You know what I'm saying, baby? No, in the gym.

[A]

Don't tempt me now. Okay, well, no, I say that because, you know, when we go on tour, I be out of breath on stage and all I be doing, cracking jokes and I be like, yeah, I just started laughing. I ain't even finishing what I said yet. But I be out of breath, girl. I don't know what to say.

[B]

The breath control is important. I definitely be out of breath on stage a little bit, too. I mean, probably not now. This tour that we're about to go on, I'll probably be better. Cause I've been working out consistently. Thank you. But, yeah, a few years ago, we was definitely out of breath.

[A]

Aw. But we gonna get better. We gonna get better. Okay, so I wanna start from the beginning with you. You know, you're from dc, Right?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So talk about growing up in DC and, like, your back. Were you, like, the kid that was always around the house singing. Singing in church? Like, when did you know? Like. Okay, I'm really good at this.

[C]

So. I was born in D.C. i grew up in Chantilly and Ashburn, Virginia. And I haven't been back since elementary. I'd never been back. Yeah. And then after that, I was in D.C. for Brent elementary School in Hine. And then for high school, I went to Coolidge School Without Walls. Duke Ellington.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Wilson and Theodore Roosevelt. And I would leave each school every time I was about to get jumped.

[A]

Why? You don't wanna fight? Jump.

[C]

Yeah. I always piss everyone off my whole life.

[A]

Are you serious?

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

That sound like me.

[C]

And I'm a really.

[B]

Yes girl. People say she coughing me.

[C]

Oh, my God. For real?

[A]

She said, oh, God.

[C]

You see me, then you get it.

[A]

I see you, girl.

[B]

Same tribe.

[C]

I was gonna guess that.

[A]

Cause you're so.

[C]

I know. I don't know what it is.

[A]

It's gotta be. So what you Used to be saying and doing.

[C]

I wouldn't say anything. Like, the first time someone tried to jump me, she was like, I know

[A]

you stole my Metro card.

[C]

What? And I was like, no, I didn't. I promise. I swear. And then I started crying, and she felt bad for me.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Eased up.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And then the same thing kind of always happened. Start crying and then they. They back up a little bit. Or I try to talk myself out of it, you know?

[A]

But the tears work. That's your defense mechanism.

[C]

Yeah. Or just transfer. Mom, can I.

[A]

So you would move a lot because people would be picking on you.

[C]

Yeah, but it's not that deep. There are people who've experienced worse bullying situations.

[A]

Right.

[C]

I'm just a runner. Sha'. Carri.

[A]

Okay. But let me ask you this, though. Cause I'm the type of person I love. Like when people used to, like, be mean to me, and now, like, I kind of look back on them, I'm like, ha, ha. You ever had that moment? Like, look at me now. I'm getting paid for.

[C]

I'm getting paid for.

[A]

Yeah, like you ever had that, Mom. No.

[C]

No, no.

[A]

Okay. Maybe I need to.

[D]

No.

[C]

Cause it's like, no.

[A]

Okay. I thought we was finna bond.

[C]

I'm trying to.

[A]

I'm sorry.

[C]

No. We're bonding, she said.

[B]

Actually, no. Never felt those feelings.

[A]

I'm weak.

[C]

Y' all are really funny. Yeah. I'm trying to think of a time where I don't know. No.

[A]

No. Okay. But that's good, though. Cause I know that's. That's childish.

[C]

I remember the people. No, I don't think it's childish, but I remember. I do remember people that said shady things. And it did stick with me. Like one girl, I remember her saying, well, I'm going to college for a real career. Because this singing stuff, you know, is just not realistic. And I think about her, like, a lot, but not in a bad way. But it's just. That's why it's so important to follow your dreams. Because you never know. You really could make it doing the unthinkable. But I don't think about her in a shady way. She did used to shade me. She did want to fight me that one time.

[A]

Damn.

[C]

She was pissed cause I was wearing a wig. She was like, why are you mad to wearing a wig? I don't know. It was short. It was. It was ugly. Oh, but why you mad at me?

[A]

Cause my wig. Ugly.

[B]

Right. That's what I was about to say.

[C]

Why you mad at me? That happens often.

[A]

That Is so crazy. I'm very upset for you now. I feel like I gotta go out in the streets and fight for your honor.

[B]

I will, because that is crazy. I thought you was gonna say maybe, like, her wig was raggedy and yours was teased. Hers was her.

[C]

Yours was raggedy.

[B]

That's probably why.

[C]

But mine was too. So y' all giving bonds, Giving party city. Yeah, right. But, you know, that's what I liked. I don't know why she cared.

[A]

So were you the type of person, like, you shared your dreams with everybody? Like, you were like, I wanna sing. I wanna do this. Were you like that?

[C]

I just was always singing.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

So people, I guess, put two and two together, lots of talent shows. And grew up in the church singing. I grew up heavy in the church. Heritage Fellowship Church, the Crowd, Church of Christ and Herndon, Virginia. So, yeah, always singing somewhere.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

With you being in Virginia, do you consider Virginia the South? Cause I know that's always an ongoing conversation because people. A lot of people from Virginia be considering it the South. But I'm like, it's way up there. How is it the south way up there?

[C]

It's Northern Virginia, I feel like is closer to D.C. so I wouldn't consider that the South. But definitely 757954. I think that's. No, that's Florida.

[A]

804.

[C]

Oh, wait, one of them area codes. Sorry. 757. Virginia Beach. I don't know what you. That's the South.

[A]

I'm just following along.

[C]

That's the South.

[B]

Virginia Beach. Okay.

[A]

So you should consider that area.

[C]

So I know.

[A]

Okay. Okay. I just always felt like. I think it's interesting when people are never, like, hiding who they wanted to be or their dreams. Cause, like, I used to walk around embarrassed, being like, oh, my gosh, I want to be on a talk show and stuff. So I always think it's amazing where people were just like, oh, this is who I am and this is what I wanna do. So talk about, you know, you graduating and that transfer into, like, adulthood and what?

[C]

That was barely graduating. Oh, my God. It's bad. Oh, yeah. I think they just didn't want me to come back, so they let me get the.

[A]

Are you serious?

[C]

Yeah. I think Theodore was like, go on. Like, get out. Yeah, I got suspended and I couldn't even go to my prom.

[A]

You was bad, Ari.

[B]

Rosie, why you got suspended?

[C]

I cursed the teacher out.

[B]

Okay. I got suspended a few times in

[C]

high school too, all the time, but

[B]

it was for fighting.

[C]

Oh, I know. That's right. Yeah, but it's me. It was just cursing people out that were trying me so I would defend myself.

[A]

Right?

[C]

Get into some stuff.

[A]

But you got a little mouth on you. That's what I'm starting to figure out. Cause you're so sweet. But you done fooled me.

[B]

Ow.

[A]

Cause I thought you was sweet. You over here getting suspended.

[C]

What you talking about?

[A]

Don't act silly now.

[C]

Don't sign me.

[A]

Don't what? You know what I'm talking about. But I get it.

[B]

She gotta defend herself. I'm coming for her, right? I think it's different if you the one that's starting.

[A]

She not starting sheet shitty now. I'm saying that's fine. But I'm saying she got a little mouth on it, you know?

[C]

Ow.

[A]

I can just tell that sweetness gonna go out the window real quick.

[C]

It does. I get real loud a vein or two.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Pop out. I like that. I gotta.

[A]

Yeah, you have to. Cause people will take advantage of that.

[C]

And they think they do.

[A]

So you gotta let them know I'm not the one to play with.

[C]

Oh, it's really bad. I try not to get there.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It might happen once a year. If that.

[A]

That's good. Once a year. We can handle that.

[B]

So a lot of people describe your music as neo soul, similar to classic R and B. What do you think your sound is?

[C]

Neo soul. Neo soul and R and B. And soul. And I like to lean into alternative sounds and jazz. It's all kinds of things. I'd like to be pop one day. I want to expand. I have big dreams. I love all kinds of music. Red Hot Chili Peppers. I'm always talking. Or System of a Dam. Okay, Nickelback. We could go in.

[A]

I love we nickel, baby.

[C]

Yeah, you do.

[B]

Wait, we do?

[C]

Really? I just processed this girl.

[A]

I went through a hard day.

[C]

Look at the folder.

[A]

Look. Every time I see it makes me laugh. Don't get me started. We went through a phase.

[C]

Every minute when I. I'm walking through the back door. Hardest singer singing Goodbye, goodbye.

[A]

See, I'm ready. Let's do the album. You need some background.

[B]

I'll do a little background vocal.

[A]

I mean, we love Daughtry. We love Medally.

[B]

I used to listen to Paramore. Like, I went through this whole phase.

[C]

That's what you get home when you let your loved one. Whoa.

[B]

I'm going home.

[C]

Oh, yeah, I get it. Oh, I love her voice. Haley. Oh, she can sing.

[B]

Yeah, she can panic at the disc. She goes, my playlist used to be Elite.

[A]

Oh, same, same.

[C]

Limewire.

[A]

Oh, the good old wire.

[C]

That's why I really don't deserve people's streams. I get it. Cause you like chilling.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Putting embarrassments on our parents computers.

[C]

Yes. And I won't tell you which supermarket, but I. Well, maybe I shouldn't say, but I was like five. Everything happened when I was five. Ok. Supermarket, where you could buy everything, electronics and everything. I was in there, went off to the bathroom and I stole me a CD player Queen. Yes, I did. And then when I was leaving the doors, it was like, beep, beep, beep. And the lady was like, oh, you good?

[A]

Aww.

[C]

But she knew. No, but what she didn't know was. Well, she assumed I was a child and I was good. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

What city was it?

[C]

No, it was a CD player.

[A]

Oh, you stole the whole thing?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, it's all right. We stole a few things too. We done talked about it on the show.

[C]

Really? I stole a lot of things. A lot of shirts. I stole this shirt that said freak a leak. Ooh, in middle school. Yes.

[A]

Now when you was five now where

[B]

you was gonna wear the freak a leak shirt.

[C]

So I wore it to a church event. I was always rebellious. People are always.

[B]

You might be walking to the roof.

[C]

I wore it under a jacket so my mom couldn't see. And then when I was at that event, I was zipping that jacket down.

[A]

It was cutting up.

[C]

I had my hat down. It was a white hat. I was like Ciara or Chris Brown in there.

[A]

And. Yeah, that is so funny. Now I do wanna talk about this because, you know, we have the category neo soul. But I saw recently in an article, Rafael Siddiq said something like they used to use that term neo soul to kind of like separate, like the black artists and things like that. They were like, they used that label so we would know. You know what? Let's not give them as big as a marketing budget as versus somebody who's like a pop artist and things like that. But I think the neo soul category, it was changed because we didn't care what you call it. The music is good.

[C]

It's good.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? So how do you feel about that title? Do you think that's something that they need to kind of get rid of or just like, you know what? We rocking with it, we gonna use it.

[C]

I think in the beginning I was triggered by it. Cause I did recognize that, yes, certain genres get more marketing than others. But now I'm just like, I don't care. It's an honor to Be received in this way to have the co sign that I received from Cole. Cause like my type of music not everyone is a fan of. And to be a part of a genre that Erykah Badu has been leading in. Jill Scott, Letici, Vivian Green. I mean so many legends. D' Angelo Maxwell, so many people we could music Soul Child, you know what I'm saying?

[A]

That's a long list.

[C]

I feel honored that in my way I can contribute that in this era where it's not as common to make music like me. But then you have people like Cleo Soul who is killing it, you know, and so I feel like, like she's also making the genre thrive.

[A]

Yeah, so yeah, we like that. Yeah, I like that.

[C]

Me too.

[B]

So I definitely wanted to talk about your newest album, Vacancy. So what was your biggest inspiration behind the album?

[C]

Just niggas, you know, like just I'm

[A]

telling you,

[C]

being in and out of my whole soul and also being comfortable in that space of being alone and you know, I'm in this hotel room just luxuriating and enjoying my me time. And if somebody wants to come in, you make sure you make your presence known, make it worth my while. And if it's time to leave, it's time to leave. So this is really just a project of just like, just really feeling that sensuality and individualism and freedom and all of that. I'm just, it's just for the grown and sexy. Like I'm really owning that. That was a term I was scared of like as a youngin. But man, I'm grown and sexy. Facts, we are. And I don't wanna be at no baby party, you know what I'm saying? Like I'd rather be at the grown

[A]

and sexy vibe Facts.

[C]

That's me.

[B]

I feel like we talk about that all the time on the show. Just like being in your 30s, how it really is your grown and sexy era. And I was so scared to turn 30.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Were you too? No, not really. I was scared.

[A]

You thought I was bonding. She did it.

[C]

I was.

[A]

You too. See, she did it to you too. Uh huh. Uh huh. It was coming.

[B]

Not she got me.

[A]

Gotcha. Yeah. She said, I'm like, yeah, you're on your own, bitch. You're on your own.

[C]

No, because I get what you're saying, but it's just I wasn't thinking. I was like a puppy, like super aloof, like a fish, like super aloof until I don't know, something happened out of nowhere when I turned 30 that, oh shit, I have to grow up. But I never had that fear of turning 30. But it's so when I hear people talk about it, yeah, it resonates with me because I just was out of it. I don't know where I was, just deep in the drink or something, you know, like.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Wow. I think that speaks to your intelligence and a lot of people's intelligence. My friend, my homegirl was talking about this too. Just fearing turning 30. But yeah, I wasn't thinking. I don't think I was there really mentally at all.

[B]

Girl. Yeah, I just. I don't know, I just felt like I was just gonna be old as fuck and my life was going to be like halfway over. Like I so terrified to turn 30. Like I just thought 20s were so lit. And then same thing with me. Similar to what you said, it was like when I turned 30, I feel like this switch just went off in my life. I just realized it's just beginning actually. Like things actually started to get way better for me when I turned 30. Those last few years in my 20s was real ghetto.

[C]

Oh, yes, super. In a few years.

[A]

She was ghetto.

[C]

A few years ago, A few months ago. Let's talk about it.

[B]

I was trying to give the people in their 20s a little hope.

[A]

You still ghetto in your 30s.

[C]

Yeah. But also I'll say that 50 year olds are looking at 30s like, oh, baby, like you young.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You know What I'm saying? 70 year olds, 80 year olds. Oh, please, child. Like, y' all young as hell.

[A]

Yeah.

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[A]

The industry that we're in, though, makes us feel all it does. Yeah, yeah. I mean we're entertaining. So it's like they get younger and younger. The influencers are getting younger. The singers are getting younger. Everything. If you don't start what you doing when you three, you ain't got no experience. You got to start at three. ABC 1, 2, 3. What is your career gonna be that is so deep. I'm saying though. Yeah because we didn't really start what we were doing until I was in my late 20s. I had no idea. So it was like, by the time they was like. Like, they still do that. Dang. Lex, you 36?

[C]

Yes, I'm 36, and I'm happy about it. I'm happy to be alive. It's a blessing.

[A]

It's a blessing.

[C]

So however old I need to be, it is what it is.

[A]

But I think us, like, obviously I'm older than both of y', all, but I'm saying us being in our 30s and experiencing that. You can't tell them that until they experience. Sometimes people just have to experience things, and they have to go through it.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

Now, I do want to ask you a little bit about, like, your songwriting, because sometimes I feel like when people write a song, it's like they try so hard to be deep, and it kind of goes over people's heads a lot. And then sometimes things can get so basic, it's like, I don't want to hear that, but I feel like you do. That perfect wow of it being deep, but it being, like, relatable because you have the type of music. It's like you talking about sex. But are we talking about sex? Oh, yeah, she talking about sex. The next song, we're gonna cry. We gonna have a moment. The next song's like, oh, my God, I love this man.

[B]

We in love.

[A]

So what is your writing process like? Is it always from inspiration, or is it from, like, people around you, what they're going through?

[C]

My writing process, it basically is just me and an amazing producer in the studio, and he's. Or she is making an incredible beat, and I may feel led to pull out a voice note and, you know, mumble a bit. Or you get the composition book out, right? Or get the phone out, right? Like with pretzel, for instance, I was just driving down 95 into 85 and had the beat, this cardiac instrumental on repeat. And, yeah, I'm thinking, okay, pretzel. And kind of also looking at the Internet, like, okay, like, what are ways that people can make a pretzel and things of that nature? And then I started thinking of yoga as well. Like, what are the terms for yoga? And that kind of all just made pretzel happen. Not even necessarily a situation or a man. Cause nobody has been flipping and folding me whatever, right? No one.

[A]

That's what I thought when I heard it. I said, who is putting that thing down? Flipping and reminding.

[C]

Not a damn soul.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

That's what I was gonna ask you too, though. Like, do you? Cause I know obviously a lot of the times when people are in the studio and they hear the beat, then they're like, okay, I have the perfect lyrics to write down for this. But then I know a lot of the time artists too, they'll just already have lyrics ready for a song. So. Do you ever just write when something happens to you and you're okay? I already have a song for this. When you hear the beat?

[C]

No, because that's just not exciting to me. I'm literally a very present person. Like, if this is on my mind, if this comes to my mind right now, or if I'm experiencing this right now and this beat is making me feel amazing or mad or whatever, then it's easy to pair those situations. But I don't usually write. Maybe I should, though. I think that could be great for another album, especially as I'm becoming more introspective. I do want the next project to be more introspective and in a deeper, darker way. But that's the thing. Are people really ready for trauma? Yeah. Traumatized, Ari. People saying.

[A]

That's what I was about to say. We are being traumatized by the thousand. These men are traumatized.

[B]

I mean, we all have a trauma

[C]

in all kinds of ways. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, you know, it's just funny, I'm curious to know what people really want. Because when I made a record like Smoke, I'm talking about how I wanna fight and punch a person and smack a bitch in the face. And people are like, oh, no.

[A]

Civil rights music.

[C]

It sounds like the holidays. So I was like, okay. And then I dropped another record and, oh, no. This is pop music. I don't believe you, bitch. Like, what the fuck do you want? And so, yeah, now I just know. Follow my heart for sure. Trust my intuition. But the next project, there will be no more seeking any type of understanding or validation from anyone. Cause I know people really don't know what they want, you know? And I have to lead.

[A]

I have to 100%. Cause they'll tell you they want this, then you give it to them like, oh, never mind. We want this.

[B]

You're not ready. Yeah.

[C]

They say, go deep. Go deep like shea butter, baby. And I was being fucked by a trash can, so. What are you talking about? That was not deep. Yeah.

[A]

I mean, it was a song that was. It was a vibe.

[C]

Yes, it was a vibe, but it was about fucking just like this whole album.

[A]

Yeah. And that's why I said. Cause you get that sweet spot. So they think it's deep. Yeah, you went too deep on their ass. They didn't understand you meant go deep. Yes. They didn't know. See, See, you gotta catch em in that middle.

[B]

But that's a really good point that you made about just not seeking validation. I think we all do that sometimes when you just have to do what's right for you. Because like you said, people don't know what they want. And a lot of the time they don't know that they like it until

[A]

you give it to them.

[C]

Hello? Yeah.

[B]

Then when you come out with it,

[C]

they like, oh, yeah, okay.

[B]

I actually do like that. But I think if you tell people before you do something or you let it be known, they're gonna try to talk you out of it. Because people like to stay comfortable, especially when they're fans of somebody. They don't want to feel like you're switching up on them or growing or evolving in a.

[C]

Like, I have different experiences that I'm gonna share, you know, this is my experience at 34. What y' all want me to talk about? I just got a new house. You don't wanna hear that, do you?

[A]

I mean, I did get a new house, so, yeah, I do wanna hear it.

[C]

All right, fine. The next album, I just got new mortgage.

[A]

Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Oh, don't sing about that. That ain't happening.

[C]

But that's what I'm saying. It's just like. Do you really wanna hear that? I feel like that's silly.

[A]

Yeah. No, I get it, though. But I think, like, I don't know, I feel like whatever you're going through, somebody is going through it and you just never know until you drop it. Some people gonna connect and they not. I always say I wanna connect with people who are here for me. Good, bad, whatever chapter I'm in, they just wanna see me and they wanna see me win and they gonna vibe through it with me. You know what I'm saying? It's just like life is different. We're not, you know, you're not 27, 26 anymore. It's like things are different. So. So the people who don't understand it, that's okay. We can fall off, but I'm gonna find new listeners and new supporters, you know what I'm saying?

[C]

And I'm leaning into that. I'm excited about that, trying to figure out how that can happen for me.

[A]

Do you feel like you have more creative control now?

[C]

Oh, I feel like I've always had all of that creative control. Yeah, I just. I think the difference now is just trusting myself more if the album. If I feel like the album's not done or whatever, I know, okay, you can say no. And that just is across the board, like, I can actually say no. So, like, really building up my self esteem in that way, you know, trusting myself.

[A]

Okay. All right, we gonna get into our first little segment.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[B]

Before we do that, of course, y' all know this episode is sponsored by Taylor Port per usual. So shout out to our people over at Taylor Port. Y' all know that's what we keep up in our cub.

[A]

Up in that cub.

[B]

And you know we always say, taylor Port make you sell a port all the time.

[A]

I've been, okay. And you know, we gotta do our poor decision. You know what I'm saying? So our poor decision, uh. Oh, hold on. I got a little coconut on my lip. The poor decision is just like a bad decision that you made this week or maybe in the past. It don't have to be nothing serious, nothing deep, nothing too crazy. So what was your poor decision this week, Little Drea?

[B]

Oh, girl. So something related to the gym. I know they be like, this bitch always talk about the gym. Okay, okay. So normally before I work out, I always stretch and, like, do a warmup. The other day when I was at the gym, I just was, like, kind of pressed for time. Cause I had somewhere to go, so I didn't stretch or do a warmup. And I think I pulled a muscle in my leg.

[A]

And it hurt.

[B]

Yes, and it hurts so bad, y'. All. Like, even when I was walking up the stairs, when I was in front of my car, I could really feel it when I was climbing, I was like, why did I do that? I know I'm getting old. I'm about to be 35 this year, girl. I'm like, you know, you need some strength. Okay, you right.

[A]

I'm not getting stretched.

[C]

But everyone needs to stretch. The babies need to stretch, the teens, the young adults, everyone.

[A]

Everybody got to stretch through.

[B]

But I think when you get to this age, you really.

[C]

You really gotta stretch.

[B]

Yeah, you really do. It makes a world of a difference.

[A]

Yeah, okay. Yeah, you do gotta stretch. I'm actually about to get somebody that I'm gonna hire her and she's gonna come help and stretch me.

[C]

I need that.

[A]

Yeah, I'm about to stretch me. Yep, I'm stiff like a. I am so stiff.

[C]

I am.

[A]

It's really. Oh, my God.

[C]

It won't move.

[B]

Remember that picture?

[C]

Wanna see you that slit.

[A]

Why would you punch that slit. I'm so glad you brought it.

[C]

I just was really proud.

[A]

I love that picture, though. Kaboom.

[C]

I was proud of my progress and people was hating.

[B]

Aww.

[C]

It was giving Freaknik 95.

[A]

But that split was so funny. A muffin.

[B]

I liked it. I love that picture.

[A]

Thank you so much for her purpose.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

My poor decision this week, y'. All. Okay. Y' all know I will forever be a Miami girl. I love to go to Miami. I don't care what nobody say. Yes, it's a vacation. I don't care that it's only a two and a half hour flight from Atlanta or however long it is. I just love Miami. So I haven't been to Miami in a while. And I went to Miami and I had one day where I kind of, like, spent by myself. Like, I went shopping. I went and had, like, drinks. I was just kind of by myself, exploring the city like I usually do. And y', all, I got so drunk. Like, I got. It was. It was bad. Like, I was stumbling in my hotel. Oh, don't arm me. I deserve that. I deserve that shit. And honestly, I'm just like. That's my point. I need to stop getting drunk. Like, I'm 24. I can't do that no more.

[C]

Be careful.

[A]

I missed.

[C]

You were by yourself?

[A]

No, no, no. I was with somebody. That was my man. I was trying to do that.

[C]

Oh, I love that.

[A]

All right, all right.

[B]

Aw.

[C]

Love.

[A]

I'm just like. But yeah, so we went to Miami, but he had to work that day. So I was kind of just you know, exploring. And then it was like he had this plan, like we were supposed to go out there.

[C]

Did he get drunk, too?

[A]

Well, he was at work when I was getting drunk.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

So by the time he came back, he was, like, ready to go party and I was cooked.

[C]

Aw.

[A]

So I messed up, like, our. One of our first nights out there. Cause I was. Ooh.

[C]

Oh.

[A]

So moral of the story is, know your limit.

[C]

Pace is moderated.

[A]

See, Ty wasn't there to make my drinks right, so that's why I messed up. So honestly, to my girly, Pace yourself. That's all I wanna say is pace yourself.

[C]

That's why I can't drink, because I don't believe in moderation. See, and that's. It's the same with candy. It's the same with bread. All of that. I can't just have one sour patch. Like, what is that? Like, you gotta take to the moon, One shot of anything. I need the whole bottle yeah. Like, I flew to Australia once, and I had this big old thing, a jack. Well, I don't know if I'm allowed to say it, Taylor.

[A]

No, it's not right. That's not right.

[C]

Big old thing of jack. Like, halfway through that flight, that bottle, halfway was gone. I was. And I needed the whole day to recover.

[A]

That was cutting up.

[B]

Being in your 30s, you don't recover

[A]

the same no more.

[C]

I was cooked, girl.

[B]

The next day, it does.

[C]

You wake up.

[B]

It took a day and a half, Right?

[C]

And it's a right. And it's like a choice. I'm choosing to poison myself and give my body aches. I just. Yeah, I'm choosing to go to jail.

[A]

But was there a certain situation that happened and you woke up and you was like, I can't do this no more?

[C]

Like, was there a certain scenario, waking up, passed out in the airport with sick and all kinds of stuff? They had to wheel me into a hotel room. It was embarrassing. In Detroit.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

There were no cameras, no lights, thank God. Oh, my God. It would have been great for TMZ or Shade Room, but, yeah, luckily, no one saw that. And there was a other situation and got locked up in Amsterdam. Yeah, that was really, really intense.

[A]

And Amsterdam is a crazy city, so you must have been cutting up.

[C]

I mean, the lady, she tried it. She was very, very rude to me. And I was hurt. I was hurt. But I'll go into it one day.

[A]

One day. We don't got to get into it right now. We don't have to get into it.

[C]

But I will say that my energy and emotions didn't have to be as extreme as they were. And I really feel like alcohol heightened those emotions. Of course, I do believe I have issues with anger, but I genuinely feel like looking back on all the arguments I've ever had, and there was liquor involved. I just feel like that was the common denominator. For me, it was the liquor that made everything worse.

[A]

And I'm proud of you. You around it a lot, doing what you do, you know, your premiere party, y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

I met ahrii at her premiere party. What was it like, two weeks ago?

[C]

Oh, I was about to say years ago.

[A]

No, no, no, no, no. It was like two weeks. What was it? I was like, we did no girl. And I was so excited to meet her, Mind you. Y' all know me. Big mama gets lit. I was like, all right, I promise. I got a good podcast. It's fire. You were not like this. I was lit.

[C]

You were so pretty. And Cool.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

But after.

[A]

When I woke up the next morning, I was like, oh, my God.

[C]

Nobody stopped me.

[A]

You know, my breath be hot.

[C]

Your breath was. Girl, it wasn't.

[A]

I know, but I just felt so. I was like. When I got home, I was like, oh, my God.

[C]

No, I was just like, you're beautiful. And I was amazed by your hair and everything.

[A]

Thank you. We had a time that night. But I was saying, like, I'm proud of you because you be in situations like that, and you just be maneuvering through and.

[C]

No, I like my water, my hot water, my tea. Yeah, I'm cool.

[A]

I love that.

[C]

I just. I don't wanna kill nobody, and I don't want nobody to kill me. And I just. I don't know what the future holds with me and drinking.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And I know that's extreme, but I just. I don't want to end up on TMZ somehow, some way that really scares me.

[B]

Yeah, I agree with that. I think definitely every situation that I ever look back on where I was drinking and I got into an altercation with somebody, liquor just makes it ten times worse. Because it could be a situation where if you were sober, you would have the conversation a little more calmly, or you might even walk away. But when you drunk, you be having that liquid courage. You be like, you know what? You got me fucked up. And it's like, it ain't even gotta go there.

[A]

Never.

[C]

This man pulled a gun out on me.

[A]

Ooh.

[C]

In Atlanta.

[A]

Cause you done lived a life.

[C]

I did. I did. Years ago. And I was. I don't know when, but a friend can vouch for me. But in Atlanta, something happened where this man made me mad. I started cursing him out, and he was like, girl. And I was like, did you use

[A]

the ts from your defense mechanism?

[C]

I froze. But I think I said, well, I don't care.

[A]

And my friend got to go.

[B]

And that was the liquor, too.

[C]

That's what I'm saying. And my friend was like, come on, ahrii. But it was just stuff like that. Like, it could have happened so fast.

[A]

So fast.

[C]

Like, just thinking I could just talk to anybody. And so things. Yeah, anybody. In any old kind of way and things like that. Definitely. Yeah. A lot of close calls.

[A]

A lot of Jesus Christ. That's gonna be your pole decision when you see that nine millimeter.

[B]

It's time to go.

[A]

You gots to go. Yeah, it's time to go.

[B]

You know what?

[C]

Well, that didn't happen last week.

[A]

Right. But that's all right.

[B]

It doesn't have to be something.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It doesn't have to be up to recent. Oh, this is great. Yeah. It can be anything. Yeah. That's what I'm saying. You know what I'm saying? That could be your poor decision, child.

[A]

Cause you cut something. I knew it. I knew it. It's something about the soft tone bitches.

[C]

But it's like, be nice to me.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I'mma be nice to you.

[A]

Yeah, you do give me that energy. Like, you're sweet and you're.

[C]

I hope that never happens. I got close on that stage, on tour, I got close. It was coming out. That was all raw. Ahrii. I think my voice. Oh, no, my voice was high, so I wasn't that mad.

[A]

When it gets deep, that's when it's

[C]

like people deep and loud. When I'm mad. Oh, it's. I'm a whole nother person for sure.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

I can't even imagine that.

[A]

Cause you do. You just give so, like.

[B]

Oh, so sweet and so cold.

[C]

No, I turn. I turn. Turn into Batman.

[A]

I know that's right. Yeah, but you got to. You got to. Because one thing about these people that will have you fucked up. So you gotta let them know I'm not the one to be fucked with. All right, let's go with the first topic. Dre, go ahead to em.

[B]

Okay, so for the first topic, we wanted to talk about leaving a good man. Because you just did an interview recently on the Breakfast Club and you were talking about a situation that you had with one of your exes and how he wanted to pray in the moment and you just wasn't feeling it. And then it was so many people in the comments having discourse about like, oh, why was she acting like that? That was a good man. X, Y and Z. And a lot of the time, what?

[C]

I don't know this man.

[A]

Exactly.

[C]

You don't know my relationship.

[A]

And that'd be manipulative using God.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

Oh, my God. People think they know everything.

[B]

They do.

[C]

They just can't wait to psychoanalyze. They can't wait to judge. People are so self righteous and delusional.

[A]

It's crazy.

[C]

If you knew, then you would understand, but you don't care to know. Like, you're being duped. Like, you know what I'm saying? You're the one who literally can can't decipher someone being manipulative.

[A]

I literally had a guy cheat on me and then like in the midst of us arguing, he gets on Twitter, is like, man, God is So good. My blessings will always come. Oh, yeah, right.

[B]

It be them kind.

[A]

My grandma just. But I'mma push through this shit. Grandma baby and I got. She used to cover up for his ass. So guess what? No, but they use that to be manipulative. Cause like, I'm talking to God, Ari,

[B]

you know, argue and pray. And that's why I wanted to talk about it.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? Like, oh,

[B]

don't make me do prime

[A]

example, but a prime example, you know what I'm saying?

[B]

But that's why I wanted to talk about it because I feel like it's so many times where us as women, we'll feel something in our spirit that is telling us that, like, this person isn't right for me. This isn't the person that I'm supposed to be with. And then people from the outside looking in, they'll look at the situation not knowing the person as well as you do, only on the surface level, and be like, why would she leave that good man? That was a good man, Savannah, why

[C]

would you leave him? I don't know this man. But what I was saying though, is that I feel like people are being duped when they are being fed a certain narrative. It's like you aren't even exercising critical thinking. Like, how about like the full picture of something instead of just a clip? Like, you don't know me. You don't know what I smell like, what I'm thinking about this person, how on the first date, this is the same person who jokingly said, I'm gonna kill you. Like, there's a lot.

[A]

And I'm gonna take that as a there's a lot.

[C]

And I'm realizing, and I know this sounds naive, but I'm realizing believe people when they say things like that, you know that.

[A]

And I also feel like they gonna be mad at me saying this, but I also feel like that American dream has been sold to us and women are just now figuring out that maybe that's not for me. Oh, you go to college, you marry somebody. The white picket fence and marriage happily ever after. When you're a successful woman and you've accomplished so much on your own, a lot of times they don't have much to add to you. So unless you are making me happy, I feel safe around you. I feel good. I don't care on paper how you look.

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[A]

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[B]

They hate that we okay with being single.

[A]

Oh, they hate it.

[C]

Yeah. And then there are people who have been married and maybe it didn't work out or God forbid, might have lost their spouse and things, and they wind up single parents. And so I just kind of feel like, like it's so much disrespect around single people, single parents. And I just, I feel like it's really. It's just weird.

[A]

It's very weird.

[C]

Yeah. People are single for different reasons and it's best that we are healthy and why we're single.

[A]

And then you said, like, especially your mental health. A lot of times they'd be like, oh, you with this good man. Y' all don't know what goes on behind two closed doors between two people.

[C]

That's when we talk about it.

[A]

You just never know. And that's why I say. But I feel like they only do that to women. Like if women are in their 40s and single or they haven't had kids, they're like, oh, what's wrong with you? But when a man is 40, they're like, oh, he got money. Oh, I know he's a hot commodity out here. And it's just like, why is that? It's so weird? Because a lot of men, because with

[B]

men, with them getting older, they look at it like, oh, you're in your prime as a man. When you get to your 40s, when you start getting the salt and pepper and you start aging, you ain't in the prime of your life. And realistically too, like, most men don't become, become extremely successful until I think they're about 40.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So I really think it's the 50s.

[B]

It's like the 40s and 50s.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So it's like for them as they get older, it's looked at as, oh, you in your prime. With us as women, the older we get, we damage Good.

[C]

Yeah. Could never be.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Never.

[B]

Could never be. But that's what they be trying to tell us. That's the propaganda.

[A]

Yeah, it really is. It's truly propaganda. Because I feel like if we're not happy in a relationship, they make you feel like, oh, you're being ungrateful. You're being ungrateful. But if a man leaves a situation, a man could have a woman who's good on paper, right? She's successful, she's beautiful. And they're like, oh, she got too many college degrees. I know why he left that bitch. She's probably a know it all. Yeah.

[C]

And I thought it was everything to have a house, to have just be taking care of myself and all of these things, all of these ambitious goals of mine that I've been able to achieve. I thought that would be attractive. And in meeting men and dating a lot of successful men, none of them would ever, ever talk about how exciting it is that I've invested in properties or would ever even want to come to see my house or at all. It was very much so. No, just come over here. Or, you know, it felt like all my accomplishments were minimized. And so I realized.

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

Know who. What I was thinking growing up thinking that, like, me being accomplished and independent would attract other successful men and. Or successful men. And just realizing, wow, I think it deters them. It does. It intimidates them.

[B]

I agree with that because I used to feel that way, too. Like, I used to think, he gonna care that I got my degree. He don't care that I'm successful. He gonna care that I got my own shit. I pay my own bill. No, men do not care about that. I always say, just get rid of your shit. Cause they like girls without anything.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Just get rid of your shit if

[A]

you want a man that bad. I don't want one that bad. I'm keeping.

[C]

Can we really talk about it? I'm not getting rid of my big dogs, Right? They say that's another thing that scares men away. Like, okay, fine. Yeah, I want a farm man anyway. Yeah, I want. I need you to like big animals.

[A]

It's so crazy. Cause it really is hard to find a man that can just really support you and be happy and be like, look at my. My girl. Like, you think that everybody wants to praise Jay Z and Beyonce, but a lot of y' all could not be Jay Z sitting there in the crowd cheering for her. Like, that's dope. They can't. And Jay Z be like this.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Happy as hell. And y' all be praising. Yeah. But y' all not Beyonce. Okay. But you not Jay Z either. Woo.

[B]

Exactly. Speak on it.

[A]

So if we on this level and we both getting money and getting to it, why you can't clap for me, but I'm always supposed to clap for you. It is a very strange dynamic. So how is dating for you now?

[C]

And it seems like they want you to be silent too.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

And just. Yeah. Just.

[A]

Look, you're not supposed to complain about anything because they're the good man on paper.

[C]

Yeah. That's why I'm happy. Like, I'm putting all of, like, my flaws, everything out there.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Because I only want to attract someone who isn't intimidated or horrified by them by that. So. So, yeah.

[A]

Do you feel like it's easier to date men in the industry or outside of the industry?

[C]

Yeah, outside of the industry. I feel like people, they. All they see is Ari. Like, the stage and stuff. They're. I. I don't think they see Courtney. And then I think men in general.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I think they're fans. They're fans.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

They like the idea of me, but no one is genuinely trying to get to know Courtney.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And, yeah. Spend some time with me. Build something with me. People want me to be an accessory to them, you know?

[B]

I understand that.

[A]

So are you dating right here? No. Is there a man who you texting?

[C]

Hell no. There's no one.

[A]

Okay. Okay.

[C]

This guy texted. Well, I called. Well, we talked last night. But now I'm thinking in my mind, I'm traumatized. Like, I don't even know if I want to be on the phone with anyone anymore because. Because I was getting to know a guy, and we would talk for, like, six hours a day. Come to find out, come to his city, and he didn't want to hang out. It's a long story, but whatever. It's online. Online. But my point is, is that now I'm afraid to talk to a guy on the phone. I don't want my time wasted. Yeah. And then. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, I talked to this man last night, but I don't think he's the one. He's a Pisces. Has this ever happened to you? Share something? I haven't experienced their emotions.

[A]

Really. You know what it is?

[C]

I think the Pisces.

[B]

I feel like Pisces men are so emotional.

[C]

They're so aloof.

[B]

Really.

[C]

And like. Yeah. I think with this Aries, they're very surface. Oh, wow. Yeah.

[B]

I feel like they feel so deeply and they're very emotional. Like, all of the women, Pisces women and men that I've met, they're all just like, almost to the point that they're like, kind of batshit crazy a little bit.

[C]

Wow. Yes.

[B]

Cause they let their emotions get the best of them a lot of the time.

[A]

And they love bomb, too.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

When they first meet you, they're like, you're the most perfect woman I ever met in my life. Yeah. And then three months later, my grandma died. Bitch, I got to go.

[C]

Yeah, their grandmas do die.

[A]

Grandmas. How many grandmas you got?

[B]

Grannies is dying that never died before.

[A]

Yes. Yes. Cause what's going on? I remember, like, I dated this Pisces and I was like, oh, my God, this is my forever man. And I just thought he was the most amazing. I remember we went on a podcast show and I was talking about how

[B]

he freed me from my cause.

[A]

He did free me shout out to you. Cause I was in the shackles of this Capricorn. But he came along and it was good. And then I realized, though, I realized maybe he was sent to me just to get me out of that, but I had to get out of him too. But it was very much a love bombing situation. Like, they're so emotional and then they're not. And then they want to spin the block. They're too.

[C]

Oh, terrible.

[A]

Too wishy washy for me.

[C]

Yeah, same.

[A]

So I can't do the. And I'm not. And I'm truly not into signs like that. But that was so weird for me. I had never experienced that ever in dating.

[C]

The same sign comes to me in bulk.

[A]

Okay, that's what I'm talking about. Really weird.

[C]

Pisces. This is the year of the Pisces or something. Few years ago. Geminis was one year, and then another year. Taurus. It's Leo's. Like, it's weird. Only in bond. That's why I believe in astrology. Cause how do you explain that? Why are they all coming to. What is this lesson that God and the universe is trying to teach me about this particular sign?

[B]

I agree. I believe in astrology too. Girl, I be feeling like shit. Don't be a coincidence.

[C]

Yeah, I think. Yeah, it's right there. It has to be real.

[A]

I just feel like. I think it's cute and funny to look up, but I'm not like, deep immersed in it. And I'm not educated enough to talk about. And a lot of other people aren't either. They be like, girl, I know you're a Virgo. So that's why I've kind of. It's hard for me to get into it. But the people who are, like, really deep into it, like, I like to talk to them. Cause they're educated on it, for real. You know what I'm saying? It'd be a big difference for me.

[B]

So do either one of y'. All. Kind of. Circling back to the topic a little bit. Do either one of y' all feel like y' all have ever had to leave a great guy? Like, he was actually really a good man, but you just knew he wasn't the man?

[C]

Yeah, two guys, but we were never together. But this one guy in particular, I. He just had beautiful energy. And he was so fine. So chocolate, tall, successful musician. He was great. But. But, yeah, I just didn't see it. I just. I didn't feel like. Like, I didn't feel like we had enough banter. I don't know. Like, that's so important to me. I wanna laugh, you know, all day with my boob. But, like, I don't know. Can I have that? Am I allowed to have that from a secure energy? Yeah, because I. I feel like. Yeah, that's all I'm looking for. A secure energy. That is also funny.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Like, I feel like people try to make me feel like these things can't coexist. Yeah.

[B]

I think people do that a lot of the time because it's projection me. I feel like we can have whatever we want in this life if you believe that you deserve it and you go after it. And I just wouldn't settle. Like, I feel like, why settle? If you want somebody that's funny, don't be with them niggas that can't make you laugh.

[C]

Because I don't want to be with someone and be like, this toxic force in their life. Because I'm not happy and I'm resenting them. And I wish they were someone that they're not. And I'm not a fan of changing a man. Not a fan of nagging a man. I. I'll leave. I'll remove myself. Cause if you. What are we doing here? I don't wanna depress you.

[A]

And I think I realized that too. Like, I think the one situation I was in where I felt like I left a good man. Cause that's really what it was. Like, I felt like I couldn't Laugh with him. He would try to make me laugh, but I was like, eh, ew. Them jokes would not be hidden. But even. And it's crazy because I even think when I dated the Capricorn guy, I dated him for a very long on and off, but I kept trying to make it something it wasn't because I thought, okay, we've been dealing with each other for this long. One thing I realized is history and time don't mean shit.

[B]

What is it called? Sunk cost fallacy?

[A]

Yeah, something like that. And I just. I couldn't get. And I'm like, you know what? Honestly, I do. Like, when I think about the one man that I really, really loved, like, in my younger years, he was so funny. Like, he was hilarious. And even now, like, my partner is hilarious, all we do is laugh. And I'm like, this is my love language.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Just sitting in the bed and laughing. Have fun.

[C]

Cause I'm an emo bitch, so I need that part. Okay, this is what I need people to know. I am a bit emo, if you haven't noticed. But, like, I am so funny. I'm fun. And so I would need my partner to not have that same emo thing. Yeah, we're gonna be emo together.

[A]

I don't want that.

[C]

Start a war outside and do things.

[A]

It's like, we have that balance of, okay, we gonna have serious conversations and talk about the future and this and that, but also, we gonna have a ball.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

And I think that's hard, too. Successful men don't like to have a ball. They don't work. They going to work.

[C]

They like to have fun.

[A]

They going to work. You want a nigga that you want to be on the cool with, like, yeah, it's like. And I think that's something that I have been teaching my partners to balance. And he's working on the balance, so that's what I enjoy. I'm like, I need to laugh. I'm sorry. I have to have a good time.

[C]

It's fun. Yeah.

[A]

So you not wrong for that. I feel you.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

I feel you. It's hard for that. Okay. All right, y'. All. And y' all know we sipping that little drink. A drink. Ty got a.

[C]

That's a mocktail.

[A]

That's a mocktail just for you. So, Todd, what we drinking today?

[B]

Okay, so specially for Ms. Ahrii, we have. This one is gonna be called the Vacancy. All right? And this is a mocktail. So this is a little bit tropical. I was trying to go a little bit you sure?

[C]

Ain't nothing in there.

[A]

It's good, Mom.

[C]

You sure?

[B]

Skin and everything.

[A]

No liquor whatsoever at all.

[B]

She like this taste too good.

[C]

I like it a lot.

[B]

So we have a little toasted coconut syrup. We have some pineapple juice, some lime juice, and then some cranberry peach as well.

[C]

And then on the rim of the

[B]

glass is some toasted coconut. And then I garnished it also with a dehydrated pineapple.

[C]

Just something a little cute little.

[B]

Little something to sip for the spot. The spring that's coming and fastly approaching. So this is the vacancy. And Lex has some with a little

[A]

tape that was floating. That was floated on top.

[B]

So that's the only difference. That's the alcoholic version for y' all at home. If you want to add any spirit to it, you are more than welcome. But that is the vacancy, y' all see.

[C]

Cheers. Cheers.

[A]

It's called vacancy because it's vacant of the alcohol.

[C]

Oh, yes, exactly.

[B]

That was a good way to use the word.

[A]

We got you. We gonna take alcohol.

[C]

That's how I'm gonna start promoting my album.

[A]

See?

[C]

Bacon of the alcohol.

[A]

Bacon of the alcohol. Okay, so. And yeah. So it is vacancy. And y' all know this episode is sponsored by Taylor Port. Shout out to Taylor Port.

[B]

Cheers.

[A]

Yes. Period. All right, y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

So today's cocktail is called the Sweet

[B]

Escape, because sometimes you just need a little moment. And this drink right here will definitely take you there.

[A]

This one starts with pa, pineapple juice, lime juice, toasted coconut syrup, and a blend of white, cranberry, and peach juice.

[B]

All of that gets shaken over ice, so you get this bright tropical base.

[A]

Then it's topped with a float of Taylor port, which adds that rich berry flavor right on top.

[B]

So when you sip it, you get the tropical notes first, and then that smooth, fruity finish from the port.

[A]

And the rim is toasted coconut with a dehydrated pineapple garnish. Because we wanted to lean all the. Into those vacation vibes. Cheers. Okay, so our second topic. We gonna talk about plane etiquette. Cause you've been very open about, you know, you don't really like to fly. Is that still an issue for you or.

[C]

I have a love hate.

[A]

A love hate. Okay, so what's your love hate?

[C]

Well, I don't. Well, you're zooming into the sky like a rocket.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

At 36,000ft.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

A little turbulence is happening, and you're supposed to just be chill about it.

[A]

Yep.

[C]

And I've seen all kinds of. Of playing Crash Documentaries ever since I was like 10. I don't know why I tortured myself like that, but I never imagined that I would ever have to fly anywhere ever again. I imagined I'd be driving or taking a boat. Like, I. My plan one day was to save up enough money to do a 365 day World World boat tour or whatever. Tour of the world. That's what I wanted. That's how I was going to see the world.

[A]

Oh, Lord.

[C]

But. But like, with success, like, that's not how life works. You can't take a boat From California to D.C. it's not happening.

[A]

No, babe.

[C]

So I had to quickly get to it. And that's why I was getting drunk as hell to get to get through it.

[A]

That's fair, though.

[C]

But I really do. On a calm day when my body is regulated emotionally, I love a good takeoff. Sometimes, like, I'm looking out the window as it's happening. And sometimes. And that window shield is closed, floor, whatever is closed. And sometimes I'm like, whatever. Turbulence. And then sometimes I'm like this shaky. Yeah, But I haven't screamed in a long time. I used to yelp like. Oh, my God. Ooh, yeah.

[B]

That's all right, girl. If the babies can yell, so can you.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

Hey, don't nobody be shushing them.

[A]

Exactly. I'm with you on that. I'm not going to lie to y'. All. Y' all gonna get mad at me for this. Oh, we need a 25 and up. Get that motherfucker outta here.

[B]

You know, a 25 and up. Plane.

[A]

A 25 and up.

[C]

They're saving us. They're angels.

[B]

I agree.

[C]

They're not trying to take out the angels.

[A]

Shut up, girl.

[C]

No, we need the babies.

[A]

They be too loud.

[C]

This is how we survive.

[B]

I agree.

[A]

Y' all surviving. Cause I'm praying. Okay, now bow your head in prayer.

[C]

And the babies are the closest thing to God. They are angels. They are protecting us. They are lifting us up.

[A]

AM. But it be too loud. The dogs barking.

[C]

Their ears, honey. Their ears. The altitude. They don't know what's happening.

[A]

Leave them on the back of the plane.

[C]

What's happening? The poor baby is just like, what is this pressure?

[A]

Well, you should have drove like you said. They should have took the boat from California to D.C. should have drove. They should have went around.

[C]

It's too hot, girl.

[A]

Ari, I can't do it. I cannot do the plan. And I'm not a. I love kids, so I love my nephews, but I just. You know what? I'm saying sometimes it gets a little rowdy on the plane. So we gonna talk about plane etiquette. You know what I'm saying? And like things that you feel like you should and shouldn't do in the airport. And flying, I feel like this. I do not like either when people don't know how to travel. You taking too long in the line. Do I have to empty up my pockets? Do I need.

[C]

That's me, girl.

[A]

Get out the way.

[C]

You have beef with me.

[A]

Yeah, get out the.

[C]

I'm stressed, so I gotta take my time.

[A]

All right?

[C]

I gotta take my time. Did I get my phone? Is my phone out my bag? Do I have a ring in my pocket? It's gonna set the metal detector off. I still got water. See, you're nervous. I'm nervous.

[A]

You got to move out the way. They're nervous. They need to separate it, too. Nervous motherfuckers take y' all ass over there.

[C]

Not.

[A]

They need a nervous, nervous lane. And the people who know what they doing go to the.

[C]

Not the embarrassment.

[B]

But they don't have that, do they? I feel like that's what Precheck is like, tsa Precheck is the people who fly all the time who know what they doing. And you got the regular line.

[A]

But people in pre check, sometimes they just be over there still confused. Or maybe they knew to pre check.

[C]

I'm not new to it, but I'm still confused.

[A]

Exactly. That Be her.

[C]

She be like, well, it's just.

[A]

Can I keep my water?

[B]

I'll remove.

[C]

I have to take my time because. Cause I have to process what I'm about to do.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

I'm about to zoom into space. Okay. We are that close to space up there.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

That's a lot to process.

[A]

I can't. It is. I can't with the spotlight.

[C]

Do you drink on a plane?

[A]

Do I. Oh, I'm drinking in the Uber on the way there.

[B]

Yeah, we be turning up on the plane.

[C]

Turning up.

[A]

I'll be on as soon as I sit down. Do you want some water? I want some vodka, baby.

[B]

Especially if it's a long flight, girl.

[A]

Pass me the good stuff, y'.

[D]

All.

[C]

I used to have a ball being drunk.

[A]

Don't let me be in first class.

[C]

First class.

[B]

Give me that.

[C]

Hey, I gotta get outta here.

[A]

Yeah, me and Dre. Because usually I be on the back. Cause I don't get my shit upgraded. So I'll be like, dre, send me a drag, bitch. Wow. I'd be like, I got you now. Hell, yeah. I don't care. I'm a party. I don't care. Put me in row 36. We turn it up back here.

[C]

No, same same.

[A]

You know what I'm saying?

[C]

I'm row 36 sometimes.

[A]

I mean I will upgrade my flight. I mean now I have an Amex so I get upgraded now. But yeah, put me in the back. I don't give a fuck. Yeah.

[D]

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[C]

Are you kidding me?

[D]

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[C]

yeah, as long as I get a window seat.

[A]

You have to look. Yeah, I'm a look out and I'm gonna have me a good time. I'll sneak a little Taylor Port bottle if I can.

[C]

Yeah, Taylor Portfee.

[A]

Y' all have minis? They need to find out. Teleport.

[B]

Y' all need to make some minis.

[A]

Have I ever gotten sick? No, but it's been a time where

[C]

I think they do.

[A]

I want to say it was maybe when we were headed to Turks for Draya's birthday. I wasn't sick, but when we landed, I was, I was turnt. We was leave. I landed, I was like, oh, I'm finna go drink some more.

[C]

Oh, that's what happened to me once.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And that's when I got carried into

[A]

the room, wheeled into the room. I will say that that's plain etiquette. Don't get too, too.

[C]

Yeah, I don't have a limit. See, that's why I had to stop. Cause I started early in the morning and then I did it again at the airport and then I was doing it on the plane and it was a connecting flight.

[A]

Ah, so you had to cross.

[C]

I went at the dag on that airport, and that's when everything went to the left.

[A]

I do know my limits. On the plane, I don't know if it's. Cause, like, the altitude. You up high, so you feel it a little more. So I do know. I tend to know my limits.

[C]

Especially, what is your limit?

[B]

She said, speaking of.

[A]

I'm not gonna lie to y'. All. I can drink a lot. I can.

[C]

I used to.

[A]

But you know what's crazy, though?

[B]

You don't say, Shut up, girl.

[A]

Shut up, girl. But Draya knows this about me. I am a fun drunk. I'm not the kind of drunk that, like, cries and gets in my feelings. I got now I got. I like to pop my shit.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I get drunk, I'd be like, do y' all know who the fuck I am? You hoes gonna stop playing with me? Hoe at me. And then we be like, girl, who are you? Who talking to these bitches? When I was in Turks, I started saying I was the first bitch with a bbl. You ho chi.

[C]

She fuck with me. Wow.

[A]

I don't know. I just like to pop my shit.

[C]

You look great.

[A]

Thank you, girl.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[A]

I love a little BBL now.

[C]

Oh, shoot. You weren't scared?

[A]

You know, I got it so long ago. I was scared to be built like I was for the rest of my life. Wow. I was bad built. That's what I was afraid of.

[B]

He said, that's the part that was terrifying.

[A]

That was terrifying. I was like, I gotta walk around like this change is gonna come.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Lex is so dramatic, though. Cause her body was nice before she had the bbl.

[A]

Oh, Lord have mercy.

[C]

There is nothing wrong with a lot of ass. There's nothing.

[A]

I just wanted a little. You know what it was? It's not that I was looking for a big dump truck.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I just wanted a more. You know, just a little hourglass. Cause I like the way my clothes fit me now a lot better. You know, it wasn't, oh, if I'm gonna get a bbl, I'm gonna attract a baller. Like, it was never like that. And I think that's why a lot of women have gotten the surgery. Really? And they're reversing them now.

[C]

Isn't that weird that that's what attracts them sometimes?

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, it is.

[C]

What is? Why? Why? Just that.

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

It's so strange. And I won't say all of them, but I have noticed with a lot of successful men it seems like there is only one body type. Whether it's like, really, really slim or just literally like surgery.

[A]

Yeah. And I think that's why. I don't know, I never do anything for, like, the male gaze. Cause I got a breast reduction, too. And they hate that. My titties. Girl, them titties. Wow. I used to have to buy extra seat for them in a plane.

[C]

I just know.

[A]

Yeah. We had to put on. They say met. You got about two seats now.

[C]

No, you didn't.

[A]

They was big.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

I tell people when I used to cook, I would burn them on the stove.

[C]

No, you didn't.

[A]

Yeah, I couldn't cook that.

[C]

Wait, seriously.

[A]

That nipple used to just be sitting on it.

[C]

Seriously. Sizzle, sizzle. Wait, did you really burn your nipples?

[A]

Wow. That was long.

[C]

No, that's good.

[A]

Boozy. It was a long day. No, I feel like.

[C]

So you could lick your nipples?

[A]

Oh, yeah. I could roll them up.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[A]

Sometimes I would have to throw them under my shoulder.

[C]

Throw them.

[A]

Throw them back. And I wash under there. Wash. Flip it on the side.

[B]

You had to flip it on the side.

[C]

You gotta get all the eggs to clean them like a pancake. Oh, my.

[A]

They was big and hefty.

[C]

What?

[A]

Them motherfuckers was big for nothing. I didn't have no kids. What the fuck you big for?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You ain't feeding nobody.

[C]

And they were gonna get bigger.

[A]

They were gonna. I will say I have big ass shoulders still to this day. From my bras. Yeah. Shout out to Lane Bryan. They had some motherfucking bras in there.

[B]

They did. Lane Bryan.

[A]

Cause I ain't flexing right now, Ahrii. I'm not flexing.

[C]

I'm just saying.

[A]

I'm just saying, though. So, yeah, I did everything I did because it's like, I wanna feel confident in my clothes. I wanna feel better. And I was like, I did this for me. So I say all that to say I just think that it's crazy that the things that a lot of us do for the male gaze. Cause it's like, these niggas gonna be here and they gonna want any. If it's a hole in this wet, they gonna want it.

[C]

I will never get my boobs done in my life.

[A]

I mean.

[C]

Nice. Thank you.

[B]

Have to keep getting them redone.

[C]

Yeah. I refuse. Yeah.

[A]

That's what I'm.

[C]

Scares me. Yeah. Someone said you don't have to do them every 10 years. Well, tell that to people who have their boobs get obliterated the capsular.

[B]

What is it called contracture or something that happens. It's like when the silicone ruptures and then the muscle around it hardens. Because now it's like foreign. A foreign, right? Yeah.

[C]

And you can get infections. And this woman was talking about how her face was getting disfigured because of the infections.

[A]

Oh, my God. Yeah.

[C]

I'm just. I would never.

[A]

And then I see.

[C]

Sometimes boobs should just hang the way they're naturally supposed to.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And I'm 34. I don't need my boobs to touch the sky.

[A]

I agree with that.

[C]

Now, Lupe fiasco, Kanye West. I don't need them to touch the sky.

[A]

And. Cause I got them removed. So I got them pulled up today. But they still hang a little bit. They gonna hang good. They gonna hang. Kitty gonna hang.

[C]

Mine are up a little, kind of.

[A]

They look nice, though. They look real good.

[C]

Yeah. This comes down. They come down.

[A]

And that's all right.

[C]

And I love it.

[B]

It's okay. Even with implants, after a while, they start to hang a little bit too.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I love that.

[B]

It happens over time.

[A]

Shut up.

[C]

Honestly, who knows? If I wasn't scared of death, I don't know, maybe I would have done something.

[A]

But I don't think you need anything, though. Thank you. Like, you have the type of body like you don't need nothing.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

You don't.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

Like, sometimes I'll be like, I'll see a little titty. I'm. You need to reduce it a little bit. Cause the back. I'm telling you, the back. And honestly, I will say this. The only woman I have ever seen who has really big breasts and everything works for her is Niecy Nash. Wow. But she get. You can tell she gets things tailored.

[C]

Oh.

[A]

And she's getting like. I mean, if my breasts. If I could have the money that I did like she had, I probably wouldn't have got them done. But they don't make things to fit big breasted women. Yeah, she got the plugs, she got the tailor. She got so, like, it looks. Look, she carries it so well. But other than that, they're not making things for, you know, the big breasted women to feel comfortable and beautiful in our clothes.

[C]

Right, right.

[A]

So it's like stuff. I got a triangle on the triangle. Look like a little mini circle.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[A]

You know what I'm saying? You can't fit that.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But that's all right. We live and we learn and we move on.

[B]

Amen, sisters.

[A]

Amen, sisters. I don't know how we got From Plains to Titties.

[B]

But, yes, I know. We didn't even get to talk about the unspoken rules.

[A]

What's. What's my unspoken rules?

[B]

Well, I mean, I feel like everybody has, like, their unspoken rules when you're on a plane. Just things that you feel like is common courtesy. Like, for me, if I'm on a plane, you need to have headphones.

[A]

In fact.

[B]

Ooh, why are you playing your music on your iPad? Or why are you playing your music on your phone loud to where people can hear you?

[C]

Ooh.

[B]

Or if you. Even if you're talking on the phone. Same. Cause you know people be talking on the phone before we take off.

[A]

Loud.

[C]

I do that. You do. I do both with you.

[A]

Yeah. You need to get on that boat, and I see. You need to get on that boat and go around. You need to get. You don't belong in the airport.

[C]

I didn't feel like connecting my headphones in. I know I was stressing the guy out, but, like, once we took off, I put my headphones.

[A]

All right.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I also feel like. Don't. If we're sitting next to each other and I got my headphones in, we don't need to talk. I don't like when the person next to me start chatting.

[C]

If they fine, talk to me.

[A]

Yeah. If they're cute, talk to me. Cool. But I have. I don't think I.

[B]

But that happens rarely.

[A]

Rarely.

[B]

This should just be, like, somebody real fine on the plane.

[A]

Very, very rare.

[B]

Always get set by older people every time. Oh, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Same.

[A]

I've never ran into somebody fine on the plane.

[C]

I have.

[A]

It was one time, but I wasn't interested. Like, we exchanged numbers, but nothing came from it. It was fine, too. It looked like he was, like, from Hawaii or something. He was, like, 6, 9. It was really cute.

[C]

That's what I needed, a Samoan. He did.

[A]

He had one kid. But you know why I sought out him, y'? All? His baby mama was white. Oh. And that kid was a little too clear for me.

[C]

No, there's nothing wrong with that. Sometimes, you know, you like all kinds of women. Maybe that doesn't scare me. I've dated people who've had all kinds. Of. Dated all kinds of people. I don't know if I want someone with a specific type necessarily.

[A]

It's not.

[C]

I want them to fall in love with me. Yeah. And I. I feel so special, like. And he feels special as well, you know? Yeah.

[A]

Well, I think the thing that kind of turned me from him, because I don't want you to say, oh, I've never dated somebody like you before.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Don't tell me that.

[A]

What you mean by that?

[C]

Thank you. But don't tell me that.

[A]

A loud, bad bitch with a fat ass. What you trying to feel like?

[B]

How do you know that he meant black?

[A]

I didn't wanna have.

[C]

That's key. That's key. Yeah. My therapist would. Yeah. Challenge my thinking. You're right. Right.

[B]

Like, you probably don't even mean black. You just took it that way.

[A]

I took it that way. Racist. Get off of my line.

[C]

He probably had the most beautiful, kissable lips.

[A]

Oh, he was fine. I think I still follow him. I'm gonna show y'.

[B]

All.

[C]

I asked him about it. Hey, what do you mean by that? Are you racist?

[A]

No, I didn't wanna. You know what's crazy? The reason I didn't.

[B]

He probably would've never called her again. Ahrii.

[A]

And he was definitely trying to hang out. He was like. He was like, oh, I gotta come to Atlanta for work. But it just never went anywhere. I don't know. I just wasn't interested. And then at the time, it was

[C]

like, oh, I am.

[A]

Look, I can hook y' all up.

[C]

No, don't.

[B]

Where's the Samoan man?

[A]

He might be nice for you.

[C]

I would love a Samoan man.

[A]

Let me not say he was Samoan. I just said he looked like it.

[C]

That well. I want someone who looks samoan. He did.

[A]

He definitely did. He was a cute guy.

[C]

But I love fine, pretty people.

[A]

Me too. I love a fine couple. I just said that today. Cause they had posted a picture of Serena and Cordell from Love Island.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

I was like, that is a fine, beautiful couple. Like, they're just both really? Really.

[C]

Can you show me.

[A]

Let me see where my phone is. Yes. Oh, yeah. You know what? I'mma pull it up.

[B]

Cause I saw that picture earlier.

[A]

Yes. I feel like Serena is so cute. And then Cardell is. What's his name? Odell Beckham. Odell Beckham's brother.

[C]

There's no way this is a mocktail.

[A]

Oh, here, I got it. I got it. There they go.

[B]

Ty be hooking them drinks up.

[A]

God damn, that's a fine couple.

[B]

Oh, they're sexy, Brian.

[C]

Oh, they're beautiful. They are.

[A]

That was a good season of love. I love it.

[B]

They look so good.

[A]

And they be on tiktoks making their tiktoks together.

[B]

They do.

[C]

What season were they?

[A]

They were season seven. Six or seven. It's a lot of fine people on that Season. Cause Leah and Miguel. Miguel. Leah is fine, and Miguel is fine. It's just a lot of fine.

[C]

I want them to do a thick season.

[A]

You know what? They should do that.

[B]

Would you go on there? Would you go on the show? Like, you would?

[C]

I think they should do a celebrity season as well.

[A]

Ooh.

[C]

Cause I. I really would like to date someone. I think it could be cute if. If that. That or like, Love is Blonde.

[A]

I was gonna say. Would you do Love is Blind?

[C]

I would totally. If they did a celebrity edition, I would love to do that.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[C]

Oh, wow. But I'd be scared. Why? I don't know.

[A]

I feel like you be scared of,

[B]

like, is it because you just. I don't know, like, you're talking to this person, but you can't see them, and then you don't know if you're really getting to know the real them.

[C]

Right. It does feel like a setup for heartbreak. Unless you genuinely do meet someone, like, genuine. So it's cool when it's good, but I imagine it to be traumatizing when it's not.

[A]

It doesn't work out. And honestly, I'm sorry. Love, My love is not blind, baby. Is your hairline intact? Oh, I cannot.

[C]

I need to smell your breath.

[A]

What about breath thing? Yeah, that too. My little breath thing. My love is not blind, baby. I need to see what you looking like.

[B]

I need to see your size.

[A]

And I don't tallness. Like, I'm a tall girl, but. And I wear high heels, so I don't care if I'm, like, taller than the man with me.

[C]

Oh, nice.

[A]

Okay, but five' five, if you're five' five. I'm not dating a five' five man.

[C]

Oh, I could totally date a five' five.

[A]

But you're not five' eight. I'm six' one in my heels.

[C]

Could you date a five' six?

[A]

No.

[C]

Could you date a five' seven?

[A]

You have to be at least five' eight. I'll do my height.

[C]

I like that.

[A]

I'll do at least five' eight.

[C]

I'll do five' eight.

[A]

How tall are you?

[C]

Five, six.

[A]

See? I mean, that's in the same area. Y' all in the same region.

[C]

I just like the money. The money tall. Okay.

[B]

He can stand on it.

[C]

He can stand on it. That's how I feel. Cause I've seen some fine, beautiful men.

[A]

That's how it usually is. And they be short. Huh.

[B]

But I feel like short men be a little angry.

[C]

No, this one.

[A]

Oh, yep. See? See?

[B]

They be a little they be a

[A]

little mad they got little man.

[B]

Cause they little.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

He was very emotional and angry.

[B]

Mm, I bet. Mm.

[A]

And don't let em have to look at me. It's like I feel.

[B]

I feel like they mean. Cause they feel cheated.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, they do. They feel like I got the short end of the stick.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Literally. You know what I'm saying? They don't like that shit. They wanna take it out on you. Cause you mad. Cause I got the height. Ho ass nigga. We don't need to go like, we not doing that. You know what I'm saying? So I think the certain. Like I said, I can do five' eight. Cause we're in the same region, you know, area or whatever.

[B]

But I could do like 5, 8, but.

[A]

Yeah, but you little. You can't do the same height as you.

[B]

Yeah, I can't. I can't do nobody. This five' two. No.

[C]

Yeah. No, no, no, no.

[A]

That's a little too. No shade to the short.

[B]

We can't do nothing but swing together.

[C]

Definitely shading the short men.

[A]

I don't think so. Because I think there's women out there for them. Cause how tall is Lynn?

[C]

Facts, Facts.

[A]

My best friend.

[B]

Yeah, she like five feet, exactly.

[A]

Cause she a little shorter than me. So she could date like a five, four man and they would be.

[B]

No, she. I feel the same way about little men. She be saying they mean as hell.

[C]

Oh, damn.

[A]

But the reason I say that, and no disrespect, but they do the same thing to me. They be like, oh, you a linebacker. You big. You that.

[B]

No.

[C]

Oh, yeah, you're not a linebacker.

[A]

I could be, though.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

In the women's league if they had.

[A]

Damn. I go play for the fat dude right now.

[C]

No, please.

[A]

But I say that because it goes both ways. Just like people make fun of little men, they make fun of people who are bigger. I'm not trying to be funny. It was never cool to be like the tall girl or to be tall and thick and this and that. Really, that is just something that has became a thing now, like, recently. It was never like. Honestly, when I used to wear heels, I used to wear flats all the time.

[B]

Or like a little baby kitten heel.

[A]

Then I got to the point where, like, well, I don't care because I like big heels. But it ain't been all, oh, my God, we stallions now. Megan made that shit cool.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

For real. You know what I'm saying? Cause usually in the industry too, there's not a lot of tall Women in the industry. Every time I go to an event, I'm like, dang, you small.

[C]

You small. Everyone's so small.

[A]

Everybody is short. Yeah.

[C]

People I never imagined.

[A]

Yes. Yeah, yeah. They be tiny.

[B]

You ready to get into the bed?

[A]

I'm sorry, I'm chatty. Yes.

[B]

So now it's time to get into the bed.

[A]

The beat about.

[B]

Bow, bow, bow, bow, bow, bow.

[A]

Okay, y' all know our segment of the Bed is sponsored by sxo.

[B]

Y' all know we love us some salt, xo. We are always raving about SXO over here. Y' all know I love this reju oil. It smells amazing. It's so good for your skin. You can use it on your face, but you should mainly use it on your private part because it's gonna help you get rid of those ingrowns. It's gonna ensure that everything is nice and smooth and moisturized down there. And y' all also know how I feel about my coochie wife.

[A]

Uh. Oh. Oh, that's all right.

[B]

The power of salt X power.

[C]

The power to sour power.

[B]

Get you some salt, xo. Y' all know I always say. Cause we was just talking about traveling and being on a plane. They also have the travel size versions as well.

[A]

Now let me ask you a question. You like to sit on it?

[C]

Whoa.

[A]

You do like to sit on it. You said it.

[B]

Yes, you did.

[A]

So I'm asking you, are you a girl? Do you like to use the feminine watch.

[B]

Cause it's important for it to smell good while you sitting on it.

[A]

You have to smell good when you sit on it all.

[C]

I feel attached.

[A]

You ain't wash the coochie with this.

[C]

I wash my coochie.

[A]

No, we can't smell it or nothing. I didn't smell your coochie, if that's what you're asking. It sting your coochie. Don't stain.

[B]

It don't stick.

[C]

It really does work. Thank you.

[A]

But I'm saying, have you. Are you like a feminine wellness product girl, is what I meant.

[C]

Oh, I am just. I keep it to. Am I allowed to say the olay? I keep it.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Real olay. And I just scrub really hard everywhere.

[A]

Right.

[C]

So my body is scrubbed as you should.

[A]

But I'm a send you home with

[C]

white rag from Walmart.

[A]

We love the white rag.

[C]

I love the rags in bulk, but very thin, so you can really just rub that fucking.

[A]

Cause you gotta be able to move

[C]

them feminine steaming off.

[A]

Yeah. So it gotta be the thin rag.

[C]

I don't know what you Talk about. And it lathers. And I just love Olay. I smell amazing afterwards.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

So. Yeah.

[A]

But I'm gonna tell you, I'm gonna send you home with one of these.

[C]

Okay. And just put it on my couch.

[B]

I'm telling you.

[A]

Cause I used to be that way. I used to be like a Olay girl. Just when I tell you. And I'm not being funny, when I started using this, I was like, I could feel a difference. It's just. It's just. I don't know how to explain it. I always say it's like a mint for your coochie. Yo, Yumchi ate a mint. I feel like that coochie was like, ooh, smell good.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And then this. You can use it for your ingrown hairs.

[C]

Like, ingrown.

[A]

I'm not gonna ask you if you get waxed or you shave, but, you know, sometimes, whatever you do.

[C]

I get wax every now and then. It's been a while.

[A]

Yeah, but sometimes you'll get an ingrown shave or hair.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I'm telling you, we gonna send you home with.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And you gonna try it.

[C]

Should I be happy and be like,

[A]

yeah, or you gonna feel like this? You gonna start singing in the shower, right?

[C]

I just.

[B]

Bottle XO is the bomb.

[C]

I think my coochie's fine.

[A]

It is fine. Let me tell you, your coochie right now is probably at a 9.5.

[C]

It's at a 10, baby.

[A]

It's gonna take it to a 10.

[B]

You didn't want me a 9. It's gonna be a thousand.

[C]

You didn't make me take off my underwear.

[A]

Oh, I'm a smell them too.

[C]

All right.

[A]

But no, I'm saying I used to not care. I used to be like, okay, you know, I'm fine. It is fine. But it just feels different. It really does. Like, I always tell people, and they're like, I get what you were saying. Yeah. It's like that. Oh, I get it. You know, it's like, I understand. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. But it's like, you know, you take that 10 to a 10.5.

[C]

I'm scared. Like, what? But if it implodes, it's not okay.

[B]

It's gonna be.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

It's great. It really is. It's great. It smells good. It's all natural.

[A]

Okay. Yes.

[C]

Now we're talking.

[B]

It's all balanced.

[C]

Okay. Natural is what I needed to hear.

[A]

Yes. And then sometimes, you know, it'll be something small, like maybe you change your

[C]

body wash. Because I don't even know if Olay is natural.

[A]

And that's what I'm saying.

[C]

I just know her and I trust her.

[A]

Because your body is okay with you,

[B]

say, for a long time.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

If you switch over, that can throw your ph off. Like if you decide to use a different type of something that could throw your ph off. But this will balance you out and have you ready to go.

[C]

Okay?

[A]

So just try it and let us know if you like it. All right, we gonna see you hang with a Vitagar. Okay, we gonna get to the topic. So the topic for today is crying while you climax. You know, sometimes you have that emotional relationship and you be like, baby, I love you. This my man. We finna get married. Okay. Like, sometimes I feel like an orgasm is like built up tension within the body, and then whenever you release it, sometimes it may be an emotional thing, like you feel like you're connecting to this person. And sometimes it might just be like a physical thing where you just feel like, oh my gosh, I had to get that. I had to itch, that scratch. You know what I'm saying? So have y' all ever cried or shed a tear while that orgasm look like you about to cry right now thinking about it?

[B]

I am. What a beautiful mommy.

[C]

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[C]

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[C]

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[D]

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[C]

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[D]

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[C]

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[D]

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[C]

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[B]

i did. I definitely cried during sex before. It felt like that Maxwell song, this woman's word.

[C]

Oh, you better sing.

[A]

I know. I felt it.

[B]

Ari, she gonna try to get in the stool with you.

[A]

Please come crying. Let's do it. I'm gonna be waiting on you at the Duck.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I'm gonna be like, hey, girl, I wanna go to the studio. I was there yesterday.

[C]

I wanna go tonight.

[A]

We gonna be ready. Let me know. Yes, I'm afraid in that moment, was it more of a physical thing or emotional? Both.

[B]

It was both. Like, I was really in love with the person. But then also, you know, it was, I think, for women, and we don't talk about this that much, but, you know, for most women, it's really hard to climax from penetration alone. Like, most women always say that. It usually only happens when they get head.

[A]

Mm.

[B]

So I feel like that was the first time that that had ever happened to me. So it was a moment worth crying for. Oh, wow.

[C]

That was the first time, your first

[B]

time that I climax from penetration.

[C]

Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. When was this?

[A]

Yesterday?

[B]

No, no, it was a long time ago. It was like maybe like five years ago.

[C]

No, because this is really inspiring.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Because sometimes I wonder, like, will it ever happen for me really? I've had a baby. I feel like. You know how it feels like after you come like that? That. The feeling of. What is that pulsating feeling? Yes. Yeah, I felt that. I felt that while having sex. I don't know what that is. Like when it. I don't know what that is, but I've never felt, like a full blown orgasm the way I feel like, getting head or like. Yeah. Pleasing myself.

[A]

I'm not gonna lie. I think that's because I think when women. And I'm not speaking for all women, I'm just speaking for myself because. Because I think most of the time when women have an orgasm from penetration, there has to be some kind of emotional component. It's a mental thing for me. I have never had an orgasm from penetration. We were just, like, doing it.

[B]

And me and N. Wow. This is deeply an emotional connection.

[A]

It's an emotional connection from penetration.

[C]

Porn will have you thinking, like, dang, I like I'm so behind. But, yeah, I imagine that too. If I'm in a deep, beautiful relationship, maybe that'll happen for me. And like, with my first boyfriend, like, he was the one that actually made me come for the first time. Like, Via head. Because I always thought it would never happen, but. And I think that's probably why I was so into him. Like, you really did this for me. And I never thought it would happen.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Thank you. And one time, it happened three times. In one. Oh my God. In one session. It was just, wow, we gonna have to call him. Right? But no, I think he's about to be married.

[A]

Damn.

[C]

Damn.

[B]

Well, we see why she married.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah, but I think like, clitoral stimulation, it's a physical thing. It's a feeling. So that's easy. You know, you get head, you get things done to you, whatever. Like that, that's 100% physical. But inside the. There's not really. The G spot is not really. I mean, it's in there, but it's like.

[B]

It's not.

[C]

I'm just so ready to explode in that way. Yes. It's porn.

[B]

You gotta keep in mind, they be

[C]

peeing to be in love.

[A]

Uh oh. Who pees on porn?

[C]

Oh, in porn, I'm like, girl, stop.

[B]

They don't even be climaxing for real. They be peeing. They be peeing.

[A]

Yeah, they just be drinking a lot of water. They do. So it's not even. They're acting, just acting, you know what I'm saying? But I do feel like.

[C]

Like I said, but that's still a talent. Cause how do you force yourself to like, just piss at any time if

[A]

you drink a lot of water before you feel? No, that ain't talent. I can do that.

[C]

Let me finish this water bottle.

[A]

Give me 10 minutes.

[C]

All right.

[A]

I'm finna go ahead. Aren't you gonna be ready to go? I'm going dark.

[C]

Hold on.

[A]

I'm going crazy. You know what I'm saying?

[C]

But no, I'll try my best next time.

[B]

Yes, I definitely think it's an emotional component though, for sure. Because that was the first time that I really fell in love too.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Did you say I love you? I said you was like. I said it during.

[B]

I was like, I love you.

[C]

Oh, I be lying.

[A]

That is so silly.

[B]

She's on my ass, so.

[A]

Have you ever faked it, though?

[C]

It's beautiful.

[A]

Have you ever faked the orgasm?

[C]

Never.

[A]

Never.

[C]

I would never. Never ever in my life.

[A]

We was bonding.

[C]

Really? Oh, sorry. But I would never. I'm not gonna lie to you. You're gonna know nothing happened. But this was good. Or this was okay.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

But no, I would never. For their fuck.

[A]

I'm not gonna lie. When I was in my early 20s, I definitely was A faker. I mean, it's probably men walking around right now. Like, man, I used to put that dick on Lexi.

[C]

I'm being a little loud, but I've never been like, oh, baby, I can't.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

No, baby.

[B]

Cause that's the reason. That's truly the reason why I feel like so many men be walking around with bad Zeke and they think they good because the women be lying and

[A]

don't be telling them, I'll take the blame for that.

[B]

Or like she said, you don't have to be rude about it, but I'm not gonna tell you it was good. If you ask me, I'm gonna be like, it was all right.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

God damn it.

[C]

Do you think it'll ever happen for me?

[B]

I think it will.

[A]

Definitely will.

[B]

But when you fall in love,

[A]

and I think it's gonna come from, like, you feeling like, in that moment, are you. Even if you're still not with that person right now, in that moment, you feel like, this is what I prayed for.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

This is the man. I know God sent you here for this. Like, you really have to feel that. And it's not you faking being extra. That's really what you feel in the moment. And do it go away sometimes after. Well, that post nut clarity gonna hit

[C]

you a little bit every time. Every time.

[A]

But in the. It's like y' all have emotionally connected.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's just a moment where you just feel like nothing matters but me and this person. I think it's definitely gonna happen for you.

[B]

I think it is, too. And sometimes it be like a mental blockage, too. Like, I feel like it can't happen unless. Like, it can't happen if you're thinking about it.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I do feel like anything is possible. Cause I really didn't think it would happen via orals.

[A]

Mm.

[C]

The fact that it did, it was like, that blew my mind, really. This is happening, happening.

[A]

It'll surprise you.

[C]

And always it happens.

[A]

Mm. All right, y'. All.

[B]

Well, you just gotta find a good.

[A]

A good partner.

[B]

Who am I gonna say?

[A]

A good eater.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

A good beater, but that too.

[C]

Eater.

[A]

Yeah, that too. That too. Okay, you wanna do item of the week?

[B]

Yes, let's do item of the week. So for the item of the week, of course, y' all know that y' all can go to musebeautycollection.com. that's www.muse beautyco collection.com. we're also having a buy one, get one free sale right now, period.

[A]

Okay, so now it's time to get into the bop.

[B]

Hey, the bop bow.

[A]

The bop bow, bow, bow, bow, bow. So bop of the week is whatever music that we've been jamming this week. Oh. And it's crazy, cuz you did bring the song up. And I was like, I want to make this my bop of the week, cuz. Well, obviously you told us nobody's folding you up in a pretzel. So my bop of is Ari Lennox, pretzel.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

But the reason I'm making the bop is because when I was listening to it, I was like, that's crazy, because women, you know, sometimes a man do be folding us up. And this is not my story to tell, but my best friend had a situation where a man was folding her up and she started crying because he was hurting her.

[C]

Oh, no.

[A]

He put her leg so far behind her head. And he was a big guy.

[C]

Oh, no.

[A]

And she was like.

[C]

Did she tell him?

[A]

Oh, no, no. She was just like. I wanted him to finish.

[C]

It was like, oh, wait, this is so sad.

[A]

It was funny as fuck. You should hold his big ass to get her.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Yes, yes.

[C]

Was she scared?

[A]

No, she wasn't scared because it was the guy she was dating. It was like the first time they had sex. And this is a big guy. My friend is little. She's like five, three. She's so little. And she was like. He put his hands. His hands, I guess, were like, on her knees, and he was, like, leaning on them and he was on. And she was like. It was so. It's so funny. But I think a lot of times women, you know, we get in the baby, like, yeah, I'm finna put my leg then, you know, if you can only do the ahrii split, you can't be putting them hands, legs behind you. You know what I'm saying? You gotta. So sometimes being folded up like a pretzel, that may be for the more experienced girls.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And if you not, I'm gonna start fighting. Yeah.

[C]

I told her, you ain't finna kill

[B]

me, I'm not gonna lie.

[A]

And there's been certain positions that, you know, you getting a little too. Hey, this doesn't fit. Hey, come on now.

[C]

Absolutely not.

[A]

I was shocked.

[C]

I need my hips. Yes, yes.

[A]

I said, you lucky. Cause imagine if something would have just

[C]

her hamstring or something.

[A]

I think this man is so big, y'.

[C]

All.

[A]

I was like, I am.

[C]

So she's in a relationship with him?

[A]

No. Well, they were talking. They were dating, and I. Not anymore, but I was like, he could have literally broke your head.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Cause this nigga was big as hell.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Scary and it's dangerous.

[C]

Yeah, tell him. Gotta tell him.

[A]

Tell em.

[C]

But I understand if she was afraid or uncomfortable to do that.

[A]

No, she wasn't afraid. She was just like. I just wanted him to. You know. She wanted to put that pussy on him. Yeah. That's what it is. She wanted to, you know, you be like, yeah, I can take it. Yeah. She said the tear fell.

[C]

I said, oh, my God, the tear fell. That sounds.

[B]

And he.

[C]

It was.

[B]

Cause he was doing the job.

[C]

Right.

[A]

Right.

[C]

No, we gotta tell these people.

[A]

We have to tell them.

[C]

We need to humble them. You're killing us.

[A]

Yes. Literally. So that's my bopper. That we are a Lennox pretzel. But only getting that pretzel. If you're capable of being pretzelized.

[C]

Don't let them take you out.

[A]

Yeah, Too much. Jerri, what you been listening to?

[B]

Okay, so I cannot remember if we said this was a bop or. I think we had a guest and they said it was. But today is my vibe. I really like TI New song.

[A]

Let em go. Let, let let em go.

[B]

So good.

[A]

The old niggas is back, baby. It is.

[B]

Wait, what?

[A]

I'm telling you, the old n had the young niggas.

[C]

It has a nice bop to it.

[A]

And it was Pharrell. Dun, dun, dun.

[C]

Oh, it's Pharrell Dun.

[A]

You know, he do that four season. Yeah. Come on. Let him know I be in the gym like this.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

That's what I was gonna say. I'll do it to my gym playlist.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

It's so good.

[A]

He's a bop. I'm not gonna lie. Cause I feel like, you know, more seasoned rappers gotta be like, okay, we coming back. Cause you niggas ain't doing it. The girls have completely taken over the rap scene.

[B]

They have.

[A]

And so TI had to say, let me come back and show you little niggas how to do it. Me and my vocabulary are back to obliterate you niggas.

[B]

Yes. We're ready. Can't wait. The album, I think, is about to come out soon too, so. So we excited.

[A]

Yeah. Shout out to T I Bob.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

What you been listening to?

[C]

Wow. What have I been. I mean, well, what was I listening to? Oh, my body all over your body.

[B]

Oh, my lsg, right?

[A]

That's like over my y' all body, baby.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Now you went. That's a classic.

[C]

That was a little freaky.

[A]

I remember when that song dropped, that video dropped. Remember that you do? Yes. I remember when the video came out. I don't remember all of these.

[C]

How old were you?

[A]

Right?

[C]

16.

[A]

16 on my body.

[C]

There's no way.

[A]

I do remember the day.

[C]

But you're 36 and I'm 34.

[A]

The reason I remember this happened when you were 16? No, I was.

[C]

No, it came out when I was. Oh, you're kidding.

[A]

But listen, Ari, that's.

[C]

I know.

[A]

There's no way.

[C]

The 90s, I thought.

[A]

But the reason I say this, because growing up, I was so into music. And while, like, most of the kids were watching, like, Pokemon and shit, I was always watching, like, Oprah and bet. I was watching all the videos. I grew up watching videos galore. So when that video came out, I used to think, like, Keith Sweat was like, everything. I was like, this is my husband.

[C]

Oh, he is everything.

[A]

I was your husband, I thought. And still to this day, when he gets drunk on stage, I love a drunk ass nigga.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

People like what he doing. He be killing it.

[B]

I love it off that Hennessy.

[A]

Yes. He gets drunk down. And all of y' all n love Hennessy. Oh, my God. So till this day, he still does it for me. I don't care what nobody says.

[C]

I love him. I love Cut close.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I like.

[C]

God. Everything Surrender. I like.

[A]

Ugh.

[C]

Don't change.

[A]

So you got that. That good, R B?

[C]

Yeah, I really do.

[B]

We need your playlist.

[C]

I love Nostalgic arms.

[A]

Yes. Okay, what we got next, Dre?

[B]

So now it's time to get into our favorite segment of the show. So we're gonna get into the Bottled up segment because y' all know this episode is sponsored by Taylor Port, Period Beach.

[A]

So I.

[C]

My favorite rapper, I Lowkey manifested it. I made met him in September, and I said, I'm gonna keep getting on this nigga nerves until he fall in love with me. So then I fucked on him in February, and, bitch, I love him. And we still be communicating.

[A]

Communicating. I don't know who he is.

[C]

How do I keep him? I wanna keep him. What do I do?

[B]

What do I dance?

[A]

That man is not finna stable. Move.

[B]

A rapper.

[C]

A rapper.

[B]

I don't know, sis. I mean, you probably be in his rotation for a minute.

[A]

Yeah, I don't think there's anything to do to keep a rapper.

[B]

Yeah, a rapper.

[A]

I feel like dating. Wanting to date and have sex with the rappers and the athletes is, like, never a good way to go. And then it's like, y' all already fucked.

[B]

I mean, it happens sometimes. I'm not gonna say it's not the way to go. Cause, I mean, he could end up really liking you. But I don't know if it's anything specific that you should do. Just be yourself. And if it's.

[A]

You can't keep somebody who don't wanna be killed.

[B]

I will.

[A]

Yeah, you can't keep nobody who don't want to be kept. At the end of the day, like, if he wants to still be with you and be around, he gonna be around. And when he don't, he don't. So there's nothing you can do. But congratulations on getting that dick. I'm happy for you. I am too. She seems, you know, I mean, manifestation is real. Maybe manifest something a little more positive next time, but I'm with you, sis. I'm with you, sis.

[B]

What you think, Ari?

[C]

I think if they were supposed to be together, they would have been together. And she said when? They start fucking February.

[A]

But she's been, like, going after him since September.

[C]

Ooh, why are you going after him, honey? That too. Like, it's already over. You chasing him. He is not the prize, girl. Yeah, you are.

[A]

Well, you know, I saw on TikTok, the girls were saying now what they do. I don't know what era that we're in right now of the girls being thirsty, but they'll, like, post a really cute video of them on Instagram and they'll tag their favorite rappers and athletes and, like, hide them so, you know, it'll say mentioned you, and they'll go look at their video and they're like, oh, my God, girl, it works. I've had so many athletes and rappers and now they be in my DMs. It's like, girls, ew.

[C]

But that's thirsty. All my life. I've been thirsty all my life. I'm tired of being thirsty.

[B]

You used to do that?

[C]

No, not that, but you used to,

[A]

like, maybe hit on me.

[C]

I'm just saying, like, yeah, I used to slide in people's DMs, like, hey. But I realized, I don't know, just nothing was coming out of it and I just felt really. I don't know, it just wouldn't come go anywhere. Yeah.

[A]

It's something about a man knowing that you wanted him first that just never ends up well. I don't know why.

[C]

I just want someone to see me and be sure about me immediately.

[A]

And go after me and go after me.

[C]

I can't chase no man. That's his job.

[B]

Yeah, I agree.

[C]

I won't make you Chase forever or anything. I want to be sure that you. You are sure and in my face.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

Let's go back to being women.

[B]

Let them come to you.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

All right.

[C]

But they say, you know, you can smile, things like that. Like in real life, smile. Little eye contact, which is really hard for me. Like. Yeah. So I don't know.

[B]

Why do you feel like it's awkward trying to make the eye contact?

[C]

Cause, like, what if I, like, look at them, like, dead in their eyes and then they look away?

[A]

That's when you keep looking.

[C]

Yeah, keep looking.

[A]

Cause he probably don't look back.

[C]

But what if he's just like, ah, decrepit bitch.

[A]

Look away. She's a witch

[B]

of the stage.

[C]

That's what I'm afraid of. Like, oh, my God. He's gonna get pissed and scared.

[A]

But I feel like. But if you give the right man the eye, he's gonna know to come and talk to you. And if not, that's not the right man for you.

[B]

Absolutely, I agree.

[C]

One guy, I was just standing at this concert or whatever, and he came to me and it was like a movie and he was fine and he just walked real slowly. Eye contact, never left. He just started talking to me and it was just hot.

[A]

Now where is he now?

[C]

I can't tell you.

[A]

Damn.

[B]

Oh, damn.

[A]

It was getting juicy. Oh, it was? Yeah.

[C]

He's one of the ones I let slide.

[A]

Okay, that's all right.

[C]

Just shouldn't have did that.

[B]

Maybe he'll spin the vlog. He probably. He might see this.

[A]

He might see this and come back.

[C]

No, he won't. It's a rap.

[B]

Damn.

[A]

Damn, Ari. All right, last one.

[C]

Shay it up. I did. Hey, guys. Okay, so basically I'm calling because my. My. The. I'm messing with. We've been messing with. With each other for about four years. Four years. We've been cracking, doing all that, you know. Cool. But he's not my. Like. I only say that as a. Like, he's not my. Like. Like, no, he. He'll never be my. And why do you ask? Because he's a bum. Like, he's broke. He's broke. He doesn't go to school. He's. He's. He's kind of bummy. He does. He takes perks. Like, it's just a lot going on. And that's not me.

[B]

Like.

[C]

Like, we're definitely not on the same. Like, I'm. I'm really a suburban dude. I'm really a suburban dude. I'm not with all that. But he Got good dick. So it's like, I'm not, mind you, I'm young.

[B]

Like.

[C]

Like, we not girls. It's like, not that that's an excuse to be bummy, but that makes it even scarier.

[A]

You feel me?

[C]

So, yeah, that's that. What should I do?

[A]

Stop him?

[C]

I was like, you giving them that

[A]

ass and he off a perky. Oh, I know he be lasting forever. I already know.

[C]

No, but the dick. Don't be a slinky. Oh, yeah, be a slinky when you off.

[A]

Oh, it does give him, like, Ed.

[C]

Yeah. Really terrible.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. I would not recommend.

[A]

Yeah, I think you need to stop. Because honestly, I do believe energy is transferable. Whenever you. You having sex with this man for four years, you gonna wake up and you gonna be like, damn, I quit my job. Damn, I'm a bum too.

[C]

You know what I mean? I don't like the word bum. I think that's mean.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

But. Yeah, stop giving them that ass.

[A]

Yeah, I agree. Four years Is four years too long.

[C]

Four years after she said four years. Wow. No honey.

[A]

Yeah. And nobody needs.

[B]

She says she young, but it's like,

[C]

yeah, how is she?

[B]

I don't know. She didn't say honey.

[A]

But my thing is. Poor baby, I don't. I just feel like you don't need sex that bad. You don't need sex that bad. Like, I feel like it's an easy thing to break off because you don't even like him.

[D]

When people turn to healthcare for weight loss, they're looking for real support. That's why more people are choosing orderlymeds.com orderlymeds connects you with real doctors and access to proven GLP1 medications like semaglutide and Tirzepatide. No guessing, just a more supportive experience. And all shipped directly to your door in discreet packaging. Do your research, ask questions, then visit orderlymeds.com podcast for an exclusive offer. That's orderlymeds.com podcast. Individual results may vary. Not medical advice, eligibility required to decipher details when your schedule sounds like this.

[C]

Are you kidding me?

[D]

An oil change is the last thing you have time for, so drive into take five and let our text change your oil, check your tires, top off your fluids, and have you back on the road, pit stop fast. All while you stay in your car. No putting your entire schedule on hold. No upsells, no problem. So you can get back to your to do list or not. Find your nearest [e-mail]. Take five. The stay in your car 10 minute oil change.

[E]

This is Martha Stewart from the Martha Stewart Podcast. Ever wonder how to make hosting look effortless? Here's a secret. When prepping for cooking and baking, get ahead of the mess with new rentals. Kitchens counter, countertop prep paper. Just lightly wet the counter so the paper grips. Lay it down and drips and spills stay on the paper, not on your counter. Cleanup is as simple as lifting it away to reveal clean counters. Effortless it is thanks to Reynolds Kitchens Countertop prep paper. Wet it, set it, prep it, done. Available in the Reynolds wrap aisle at Weight Walmart.

[C]

This is Bethany Frankel from Just be with Bethany Frankel. Most dog food is marketing, not nutrition. That is why Biggie and Smalls eat just food for dogs. Real 100% human grade food with ingredients I actually recognize. And yes, I do see the difference. Better digestion, healthier skin, more energy. Dogs that feel better. My babies, if you've been on the fence about swimming, twitching, stop overthinking it. What's more important than your furry babies and their health? Go to justfood for dogs.com right now and get 50% off your first box. No code needed. Just try it.

[D]

Hi, I'm Cindy Crawford and I'm the founder of Meaningful Beauty.

[C]

Well, I don't know about you, but, like, I never liked being told, oh,

[D]

wow, you look so good for your age.

[C]

Like, why even bother saying that?

[B]

Why don't you just say you look

[C]

great at any age, Every age.

[A]

Age.

[D]

That's what Meaningful Beauty is all about. We create products that make you feel confident in your skin at the age you are now.

[B]

Meaningful Beauty.

[D]

Beautiful skin at every age.

[C]

Learn more@meaningful beauty.com. I don't ever need it again if that's the answer.

[A]

So good luck. Good luck, my good sister. We ain't doing. She is cute.

[B]

Girl, let that nigga go.

[C]

Let him go. There's so many guys. So many guys.

[A]

All right, y'. All. Okay, Ms. Ahri. This was so much fun. Did you have all of her?

[C]

I did.

[A]

I love this.

[C]

Thank you.

[B]

This is amazing.

[A]

Yes. So let everybody know where they can find you. What you got going on, all that good stuff outside of baking.

[C]

Should I put on some lip gloss? Do they look dry?

[A]

No, they look juicy.

[C]

I think they still look good. Okay. All right, fine. Yep. Okay. So y' all can find [e-mail] or Instagram, Facebook. I have a tour coming up, the Vacancy Tour. I dropped an album called Vacancy. So, yeah, come and join me on tour. We're gonna get real sexy and sensual. Can't wait to see y', all, period.

[A]

This was so much fun. Thank you for so much. Yes.

[C]

Having me. Make sure.

[A]

Yes. And make sure y' all check out. Love, Lex P. Every Monday at 10am

[B]

and make sure you go to muse. Beautycollection.com. bye, y'.

[A]

All.

[C]

Bye.

[B]

Never made it as a wise man

[C]

I couldn't cut it As a poor man's feeling tired of living as a blind man I'm sick of sight without a sense of feeling this is how you remind me this is how you

[A]

remind me of what I really am

[B]

this is how you remember Remind me

[C]

of what I really am it's not like you say sorry was working on

[B]

a different story this time I'm mistaken

[A]

for hand you a hard work breaking

[C]

I've been wrong I've been down in the bottom of every bottle in my world in my hair scream about we having fun yet yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

[A]

no, no yeah, yeah, yeah no, no

[C]

it's not like I didn't know I said I love you and I swear I still do and I must have been sober.

[B]

This is how you remind me me

[C]

of what I really am this is how you remind me of what I

[A]

really am it's not like you say sorry then I'm sitting on a different

[C]

story this time I mistaken for it

[A]

and your heart were breaking I've been

[C]

wrong I've been down a bottom of every bottle these people our words in

[A]

my head scream are we heaven for

[C]

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah no, no yeah,

[A]

yeah, yeah no, no, No, no. Yes. No, I wasn't y' all ready? I was white close it down.

[C]

You remind me of what I really am it's not like you say sorry

[A]

I was waiting on a different story

[C]

and this time I'm almost thinking I'm

[A]

going to go ahead and you a hard breaker I been wrong I've been

[C]

down until the bottom of every bottle

[A]

and then the world in my hair

[C]

and as we're and have we yet yeah, yeah.

[A]

Felt at the bottom of that teleport bottle oh yeah.

[B]

So nice to meet you.

[C]

Thank you. We had a great time.

[B]

This was so fun.

[A]

Really good episode.

[B]

It was. This is Angela Yee from Angela Yee's Lip Service.

[C]

Every day Planned Parenthood health centers across

[B]

the country open their doors and provide high quality expert health care. That's no simple task when lawmakers are trying to block access to life saving care like birth control, cancer screenings, STI testing, abortion and more. At Planned Parenthood, care continues because they believe your body is your business and being able to control your own body.

[C]

That's the most basic freedom there is. So Planned Parenthood won't back down.

[B]

Visit I'm4pp.org to learn more and get involved.

[D]

When people turn to healthcare for weight loss, they're looking for real support. That's why more people are choosing orderlymeds.com orderly meds connects you with real doctors and access to proven GLP1 medications like semaglutide and Tirzepatide. No guessing, just a more supportive experience. And all shipped directly to your door in discreet packaging. Do your research, ask questions, then visit orderlymeds.com podcast for an exclusive offer. That's orderlymeds.com Individual results may vary. Not medical advice eligibility required. See Cite for details.

[A]

If you're a maintenance supervisor at a manufacturing facility and your machinery isn't working right, Grainger knows you need to understand what's wrong as soon as possible. So when a conveyor motor falters, Grainger offers diagnostic tools like calibration kits and multimeters to help you identify and fix the problem. With Grainger, you can be confident you have everything you need. Need to keep your facility running smoothly? Call 1-800-GRAINGER clickgranger.com or just stop by Granger for the ones who get it done. You know that feeling when a story just grabs you and won't let go? That's the kind of drama that's waiting for you on Disney Hulu. Mysterious post apocalyptic thrillers like the acclaimed Hulu original Paradise, action adventure dramas like Daredevil, Born Again and iconic medical dramas like Grey's Anatomy. Or maybe you want your drama with a side of comic relief. With shows like High Potential, find the drama you want on Disney and Hulu with a bundle. Subscription terms apply.

[E]

When Kohler, global design leader in luxurious kitchen and bath products, asked me to be their ambassador for timeless, elegant, durable cast iron iron, I said I'm in. Soon after, I was in their Kohler, Wisconsin foundry watching molten iron, poured enamel applied by hand and the beautiful finished pieces ready to ship. Since 1883, Kohler cast iron has been crafted by incredible artisans, and seeing it firsthand gave me a whole new appreciation for their craftsmanship. Now I'm proud to lend my stamp of approval to my favorite Kohler cast Iron products, products for their durability, beauty and enduring style. Shop my curated [e-mail] as the Kohler Cast Iron Ambassador, I say, long live cast iron.

[A]

This is an Iheart podcast.

[B]

Guaranteed human.