What if grief isn’t something you “get over,” but something you learn to carry—without losing yourself in the process?

In this powerful conversation, Colleen O’Grady talks with grief expert and widowed mom Krista St. Germain about what grief really looks like—beyond the outdated “five stages” idea. Krista shares her personal story of losing her husband suddenly and what she learned the hard way: grief doesn’t end, it changes—and healing comes from integrating loss into your life with compassion, emotional safety, and realistic expectations. Together, they explore how grief shows up differently in families (including anger, shutdown, clinginess, and conflict), why time doesn’t “heal” on its own, and how parents can support grieving teens without forcing conversations or pressuring anyone to “be okay.”

Krista St. Germain is a Master Certified Life Coach, post-traumatic growth and grief expert, widow, mom, and host of the Widowed Mom Podcast. After her husband was killed in a crash caused by an impaired driver, Krista rebuilt her life using tools from life coaching, nervous system regulation, and modern grief science. She now coaches and teaches widows—and educates the broader public—so people can move forward without being harmed by outdated, isolating grief myths.

Grief isn’t a problem to solve—it’s an experience to understand.
When a teen becomes clingy, angry, or shuts down, start with: “How does this make sense?” Instead of pushing for words, offer steady presence, reassurance in the present, and emotional permission.
Healthy grieving includes both sorrow and restoration.
The Dual Process Model helps families stop judging themselves: you’ll naturally move between “loss-oriented” moments (crying, remembering, handling logistics) and “restoration” moments (laughing, hobbies, friends). Healing lives in the back-and-forth.
Watch for secondary losses—and name them.
Grief isn’t only the big loss. It’s also the “paper cuts” that keep coming: milestones, holidays, weddings, traditions, even taking something down in the house. Naming a moment as a secondary loss reduces shame and helps you respond with compassion instead of “What’s wrong with me?”

When your teen won’t talk but is acting different:
“I notice you’ve been wanting to stay close lately. That makes a lot of sense after what happened. You don’t have to talk about it, but I’m here—and we’ll get through this together.”
When anger shows up (yours or theirs):
“Something big is underneath this. We can take a pause. I’m not here to fight you—I’m here to understand what’s going on.”
When you feel guilty for laughing or having a good moment:
“This is the restorative bucket. I’m allowed to breathe. Grief and joy can exist in the same life.”

Learn More at: https://www.coachingwithkrista.com/

Follow at: https://www.instagram.com/lifecoachkrista/

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