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I need to issue an apology. I just feel overstimulated a lot, so be patient with me. If I'm all over the place, let's talk birth. Okay? I want to give you guys the full rundown. And I remember the anticipation of him coming was just giving me so much anxiety. I don't think I could have predicted how crazy I felt at the end. And I click on the voicemail and it says, please do not come to the hospital. We are at capacity. I look at my doula and I'm like, what's going on? What's happening? And she's like keeping me calm. But I can tell that something's like, not, not right. This is the Pursuit of Wellness podcast and I'm your host, Mari Len. Hi guys. Welcome back to the Pursuit of Wellness podcast. It has been so long. I think I checked back yesterday and I haven't recorded since February and I was super pregnant and that was like a one off episode. I don't remember the last time I did an interview. I think it was before I was pregn. You guys will probably remember better than me, but we are back. I'm so excited. I'm currently pretty much exactly three months postpartum. I feel like a different person. I was just chatting with the team outside and it's crazy how much your brain and perspective on life changes. So it's actually pretty crazy to sit back down and do this show because I've been doing the show for like, I don't know, three years at this point. And I've been through so much on the microphone with you guys. Fertility, acne, diet, wellness, women's health, all the things. And now I'm sitting here as a mum and also just as someone who is trying to find themselves again. I think that's like the biggest piece of this is refinding, like, who I am now postpartum, obviously going through a healing fitness journey, essentially like starting all over again. And it's kind of fun that I get to do it with you guys this time. And I'm just excited to connect with other moms who listen. Maybe you're not a mom and you're just excited to hear about the journey. Either way, thank you for being so patient with me. I feel like I definitely went through a time where I needed to step back during IVF and pregnancy and having a baby. And I just feel really excited to be creative again. For me, this is very much like a creative outlet and a place where I get to connect with you guys. I definitely started to feel Ready again. I was having a lot of ideas of episodes. I wanted to do things. I wanted to talk about guests I'd like to have on in the future. And I was like, okay, I think it's time. With that said, I'm still so, so, so freshly postpartum. My brain a little mushier than usual. If you've had a baby recently, you know, anytime I'm talking to another adult, my brain is like, split in half thinking about minutes, ounces. When did he last eat? When's his next nap? What's he doing now? I just feel overstimulated a lot. So be patient with me. If I'm all over the place, you know what's going on. But I also think it's going to be really good for me to just get out of the house and kind of feel like myself again, because I definitely have been in a little bit of a. A baby cave is what I will call it. And it just feels really fun and exciting to be out and about and doing something that I love. And I saw a lot of your guys's feedback just with the excitement of having the show again. It means so much that you guys are still interested in tuning in, and I so appreciate it. So I have a lot of episodes in mind. I think we're going to start with some solos because we have so much to catch up on. The birth story is a big one. I did post it on TikTok, but I didn't have time to go fully in depth. And a lot of you told me that you do not even have Tick tock on your phone, which you're better than us because that is. That is a. A great thing to not have TikTok on your phone. You don't need it. Okay, don't even go there. So. So I'm going to dive into the birth story. I'm also going to do an episode where I answer a bunch of your guys's questions. In the future, I definitely want to talk about my breastfeeding journey, my current, like, fitness journey, what I'm thinking to just feel like myself again, which is going to take a lot of time before I hop into the birth story. Also, I want to issue an apology, which is so dramatic of me, but one second, I need to issue an apology. I. A lot of moms have said to me that they've had this experience that when they have a baby, they all of a sudden want to go apologize to their mum friends for not having understanding of what was going on. And I also had that experience. I was like, wow, I couldn't have even pictured what this would be like. And I even apologized to some of my mum friends. I was just like, I'm sorry that I didn't understand. I mean, I was. I'm a pretty empathetic person, so I'm not like, there's not nothing really to apologize for, but you just have this sudden feeling of, like, wow, moms go through this crazy experience, and before you have a baby, you just don't know. And there's just like a certain level of connection and empathy that happens after you have a baby. And I also was just thinking of any time on this podcast that I've interviewed covered a topic that involves babies, motherhood, formula, birth, whatever, because I've had a lot of guests on the show who are in the health industry and have strong opinions one way or the other. And I just think speaking on those topics before you have a baby is. I don't know what word to use. It's naive and maybe a little. It was a little ignorant of me. And I want to apologize because I've learned so much through my experience, and if I could go back and kind of have more, I have an understanding around certain things, I would love to do that. So anyway, a great learning for me. And also just like, it is really cool to connect with other mums and kind of have this universal experience that we all go through of, like, it really is like an upheaval of who you are and what your life is. So anyway, before I go too deep into that, let's talk birth. Okay, I want to give you guys the full rundown. I didn't even really go into that much detail on my tick tock because it gives you a limited amount of time. Which is why I'm so excited to be podcasting again, because I really feel like this is my platform. I love podcasting. Let's go back. It's so crazy how you don't remember being pregnant. Like, it is biologically bizarre that we get pregnant and go through all this stuff and then just completely forget about it once you have the baby. Like, that's kind of diabolical. But I was getting super pregnant, and I never really had a super intense birth plan. Let me say that I think a lot of people assumed that I would be maybe a lot crunchier than I was, like, at home, birth unmedicated, which actually was never my intention, to be honest. After going through IVF and having to give myself shots every day for months and months and months and going through Everything I went through to get pregnant and the trauma of that, I was kind of like, I just want to have a relatively good experience. Like I don't want to kind of. I'm not in the mindset to take a risk and I'm not in a mindset to like take on a lot of pain right now, if that makes sense. I have a lot of respect for how women go about their births and honestly couldn't care less. Like, do what makes you happy. If a hospital make birth makes you happy. If an at home birth makes you happy, do what makes you happy. I think that's a big learning lesson for me in motherhood. It's like everyone should really just do what makes them feel their best because ultimately that's going to be the best outcome. But for me, I definitely did a lot of prep. I did hypno birthing classes because I just wanted to learn about breathing and mindset for birth. I did pelvic floor therapy. I worked out. Like I definitely had a vaginal birth in mind, but I was completely open to epidural. I wanted it to be in the hospital, but I was pretty set on it being a vaginal birth. That's the one thing I was really wanting. I also will say, I think having been an IVF mom and having some complications at the beginning that scared me and I was like, I definitely want to be in a hospital because I never want to feel scared. So that maybe changed my perspective on it too. But again, I'm not a medical professional and to each their own. I'm just speaking on my experience. So anyway, I'm super pregnant. We're getting closer and closer to the due date which was December 5th. Okay. And I am really uncomfortable. Like my first and second trimester were pretty chill. Didn't have nausea, really, really didn't have any major symptoms. I felt great. Looking back, my third trimester was brutal. I had really bad carpal tunnel. I had horrible pain. And it's funny cuz I like can't even remember now like what it was like, but I had tingling and pain in my hands and wrists like at all times to the point where I could barely like write with a pen. Weightlift. So I was doing like ice baths on my hands every day. I ended up getting cold cortisone shots in both hands which fixed the problem. And they told me it was like a very severe case of carpal tunnel which completely went away when I delivered Kai. They say it happens from all the fluid and pressure in the body cutting off certain Blood flow, I think. But anyway, I had carpal tunnel. I was not sleeping. I had really bad pregnancy insomnia. And I was also just in a lot of pain in my feet in general. I was just very, very uncomfortable in my third trimester. For some reason I thought that I would go into labor early. And I think a lot of first time mums believe that they will go into labor early, which often is not the case. Like when you are a first time mum, generally you're going a week or two past your due date, which is something that I don't know why. Anyway, I was getting closer and closer to the due date. I remember Thanksgiving, I was like convinced that he was going to come on Thanksgiving and he absolutely wasn't even close to coming on thanksg. I was going into the OB GYN to get checked. I got cervical checks done. I think I was like maybe a centimeter dilated. I was doing everything, guys. I was doing raspberry leaf tea dates. I was walking a ton. I was like sidestepping on sidewalks. I was doing the miles circuit, which is where you're like upside down for 30 minutes. It was pretty brutal. None of it worked. And I have like a little bit of an obsessive way of thinking. And I remember the anticipation of him coming was just giving me so much anxiety. I don't think I could have predicted how crazy I felt at the end. Because every day I was like, today's the day, today's the day. Today's the day. Tonight's the night, tonight's the night. And it obviously didn't happen. And I was kind of losing my mind and I was getting like coffee with other expecting moms and we were talking about it and one of my friends was like, you know, why don't you just induce? Like, why don't you go in and induce the labor? Which is when you can choose to have Pitocin. And Pitocin induces labor. It's like a medication. And that was something I always said I didn't want to do. And that's the thing, guys. My biggest learning from motherhood and birth and all of it is to just let go of expectations and let go of control. Because you think you're going to be one way and then you're in it and that completely changes and that's okay. And I think, you know, I'll. I'll speak more about this when you hear the rest of the story. But the decision to induce was kind of my first moment of being like, okay. I think letting go of what I thought that I wanted and what I thought would happen is just what has to happen right now. I have to let go control. So I decided if Kai is not here or the baby isn't here by early December, I'm going to induce. Because I was getting so uncomfortable at this point, I went to the OB gyn, we did another check. It wasn't looking like any, like much progress had been made. And they said, well, if you want, we can offer you. I think it was like a 6am induction appointment on December 4th. And I looked at Greg and he was like, wait, that's. This appointment was so funny because I think it was the moment that Greg realized we were actually having a baby. A lot of men, like, it takes them a minute to wrap their head around it. And he was like, wait, that's like next week. And I was like, yeah, great. Like let's get this baby out. Like let's go. And he was like, whoa, whoa, I gotta, I gotta wrap some things up at work. And I was like, okay, get back to the office, go wrap them up. Like we're having a baby. So I agreed to the, the 6:00am induction on December 4th, which was crazy. It was kind of crazy to know that it was coming. But it also gave me a week to try everything. Like I kept doing the miles circuit. I was really giving it my all. I didn't go down the path of like castor oil or some of those more extreme routes. I was just sort of you know, walking and doing the tea and everything like that. Anyway, we get to December 4, baby is not here. So we prep for going to the hospital. All the bags were packed. My bag, baby's bag. Greg. Greg didn't really bring that much, to be honest with you guys. But we were ready to go. And we Woke up at 4am on Dec. 4. I was so nervous. Like I'll never forget the day before the induction. My heart was racing and it was partially about birth and like the pain of birth, but it was also like my whole life is about to change and I feel like Lulu's not ready, Arnold's not ready. Oh my gosh. Like, is our marriage going to be the same? Like you have all these crazy like fears going into it and it's, it's weird cuz you technically have nine months to prepare for it, but you really, it all hits you right before. So I was super duper nervous. We Woke up at 4am Dec. 4. I'm like getting ready to go doing my skincare, wearing my little Sweatset I wanted to wear for the day of birth. And I eat my breakfast. We're headed out the door, and I check my phone really quick just before we get in the car. And I had three missed voicemails from the hospital. And I'm like, wait, what's going on? And I click on the voicemail and it says, please do not come to the hospital. We are at capacity. And I look at Greg and I'm like, wait, we're not going to the hospital right now. I had three messages. Do not come. Do not come. Do not come. We are full. I was like, what do you mean you're full? Like, am I not giving birth today? Like, this is crazy. I am. I'm mentally prepared to give birth today. So I end up getting on the phone with the hospital, and they say, yep, we are full. We are going to try and get you in this morning, but no promises. And I'm so tired at this point because I've had no sleep. So I'm like, you know what? The best thing I can probably do is go back to bed and get more sleep, because if I'm giving birth today, I want to be well rested. So somehow I go back to bed. I give Greg my phone to keep an eye out for the hospital calling. He wakes me up around 8am and he's like, they called. We're going in. They have room. So I'm like, okay, here we go. And for some reason at this point, I was less nervous because I don't know why, like, something changed in my mindset when they called because I was like, okay, this is just out of my control. I need to go with the flow. We head to the hospital. And it's so weird with an induction like you. It's not like you're in the hospital, like, screaming in pain with contractions. It's not what you picture in the movies. It's like you walk in and they put you in your room and you put the gown on, and then you have a discussion, like, what's going to happen? I had a really sweet nurse, and we brought them all Bloom energy drinks. They were all hooked up with the Bloom Energy. They had their gift baskets, and we talked about the Pitocin. And the original plan my doctor wanted to do was, like, a very aggressive dosing of Pitocin just to kind of get things moving. And I was like, okay, can we actually start at the baseline? So we started with very minimal ptosin, also the worst part of the whole day. And I don't want to scare anyone. Cuz it was the best day ever. And I would do it a thousand times again was the iv because for some reason they couldn't find my veins and they ended up putting it in my wrist. And I still have a scar from this IV actually. And it was in this really annoying part of my wrist where I couldn't bend my hand. And it was really painful, which is just so funny. Like this tiny needle of all things, was the most annoying part of the day. But anyway, I have the iv, we start Pitocin. I think it took a total of two hours for me to start feeling like something was happening. Like really not much. Not much was going on. The first couple hours, I'm like getting up to go to the bathroom. They're monitoring the baby with the straps on my belly. Everything's going okay. And then all of a sudden, within like two hours, my water breaks. And I was kind of amped to have this experience. Like, I don't know why. I've always like, kind of looked forward to birth my whole life and been very, like excited for it and nervous, but excited. And because of like IVF and my fertility journey, I wanted to like have this experience. So having my water break, me and Greg were like, whoa, this is so cool. It's like all over the floor, dramatic, whatever. And that was kind of a fun moment. But then obviously the contractions start. I've heard that people have different types of contractions. Like they can come really from your back, like lower back pain. Mine were all very much in the front and I felt the best standing up, like swaying side to side. At this point I had my doula there. So for some reason I was not 100% sure if I wanted my doula in the room, like leading up to it. Because in my head I was like, well, maybe I want it to be a private moment. Like, do I even really need her in there? I'm not sure why I was having those reservations, but I decided last minute that I did want her there. And luckily she was already in the hospital for a different birth. So I called her and she came down and she was talking me through each contraction, which was so, so helpful. If you are thinking about getting a doula, I will say it was very beneficial to have her there. Talking me through things, motivating me. I'm definitely someone that's like, I respond well to like hardcore motivational, like discipline type speaking. And she was definitely helping me through each one. We were playing EDM music. I remember Greg was like the DJ in the corner playing the EDM music. It's really funny because the men were Greg. You know, everyone's husband's different, but he. They obviously don't know what you're going through, right? So he thought it would be helpful to, like, talk to me and, like, try to have conversations with me about random stuff the whole time. And I literally was like, please stop speaking. Like, I am so locked in right now, I cannot listen to you. And my doula was even like, greg, like, let's. Let's table that. So the doula will also help you control your husband, which is really helpful. But Greg ended up, like, getting behind me and, like, helping me sway. And I was kind of vibing guys. Like, the contractions, yes, are an unearthly type of pain, but also, it kind of feels natural. Like, it's really difficult to put into words, but you can muscle through it. And I think women are really incredible. And for some reason, I was kind of like, yeah, like, we're doing this, even though it was very, very painful. And I, like, couldn't see speak during them. But I did get on the list for the anesthesiologist, which I didn't realize this, but when you are in labor, you want to put your name down on a list for the anesthesiologist, because it can take an hour for them to get to your room, which means you're having insane contractions getting closer and closer and closer by the time they're able to come to your room. So I was on the list, and I think I was having contractions for maybe an hour, and they were getting closer and closer together. So I'm like, you know, swaying, listening to the music. But it's getting harder and harder for me to, like, withstand the pain because they're getting more intense, closer together. Eventually, he comes in. This, for me, was the most challenging part other than the IV of the whole day. They put you on the bed, and you're already contracting, so sitting on the bed, and then they have you crunch over. So, like, Greg was in front of me, and I was, like, hanging on him so that my back was bent. And that was really, really painful for me because, if you can imagine, like, the uterus is, like, crunching, and to extra crunch is just, I mean, so bad. And by the way, this is not meant to be a. I just want to reiterate, like, it was the best day of my life, and I would do it a million times again. And if you are having fear about birth, like, you have so much more mental power than you realize and you will look back and want to do it again and again and again. But anyway, I am crunched over Greg and the guy. I don't even want to go into detail, honestly, because if someone's listening who is pregnant, I don't want to scare them. But the getting the epidural needle in my back was like, not my favorite thing. I definitely like screamed, but it was over very quickly. And it really does remove a majority of the pain that you feel from contractions. Like you can't feel anything. I did not have the best reaction to the epidural. I. I've never had great reactions to anesthesia. Like if you guys listen to my egg retrieval episode, I ended up having a vasil vagal nerve reaction to my egg retrieval anesthesia because I passed out afterwards and threw up and Etc so often the epidural I'm kind of laying there and I'm getting really nauseous. So I did end up throwing up like pretty much hours after getting the epidural, like throwing up four hours and shaking violently. So if you've seen videos, you get something called labor shakes, which is when you're like uncontrollably shaking before you go into labor. I had that the entire time. So I'm shaking and throwing up and I'm kind of thinking, why did I get the epidural? Like, I felt better before, so I don't know. I don't know why I had that reaction. Maybe it's normal, but they kept flipping me on different sides and I'm like throwing up into bags on each side and I'm really not supposed to eat at this point. They say in case you need to get a C section, they don't let you eat. So throwing up and shaking, I'm just exhausted at this point because my body has been doing so much work that I'm tired. I think that's the biggest piece about labor is like, it feels like a marathon. I know for some people it's not that way, but I think for a lot of first time moms, it really is exhausting. Anyway, my doctor, Dr. Seeker, who is like the best OB in Austin, he's awesome, comes in and checks me, does a cervical check and he's like, oh my gosh, you dilated really quickly. You're at 8 centimeters. So we're like 2 centimeters away from being ready to push. But the thing that's funny is you imagine, you just imagine things moving a lot faster. And when you're in the hospital, it's a long process. Like, each check is, like, an hour or two spaced out. So you're really there for hours and hours and hours and hours. But the time also flies. Like, it's. It's the most bizarre experience. But I kept looking at the clock and, like, you know, wondering what's going on. The next time he came in, he was like, okay, we're ready to push. I was like, oh, my God, we're doing it. And I was really nervous but excited to push. Like, I had been prepping for this moment, like, with my pt, you know, my pelvic floor therapist. We've been practicing pushing positions, and I knew the breath work I wanted to do and the best effective pushing positions for me. And Greg was also amped for this moment. He, like, loves coaching me in workouts and things like that. So this was, like, his moment. So not his moment. It was very much my moment, but he was behind my shoulder coaching me. So, anyway, we get ready to push, and I think they had me on my back, which wasn't really what I wanted. I wanted to do side lying, pulling on a towel. We did that as well at some point. But anyway, I start pushing, and immediately, like, within 10 minutes, Dr. Seek is telling me, we see his head, we see his ear. He has hair. And I'm just like, what do you mean he has hair? Like, I was just, like, losing it. I can't believe he's real. Is he coming out? This is. Is crazy. And Dr. Seek is like, okay, his head is sideways. Like, his. He was. His neck was twisted a little bit, and he was like, it should be okay. We keep pushing. And the pushing's effective. Like, it's. He's definitely coming out, I think. I was pushing for an hour, and I noticed that Dr. Seeker and the nurses are kind of, like, looking at each other and looking at the monitor and kind of having a lot of, like, side conversations. And I look at my doula, and I'm like, what's going on? What's happening? And she's, like, keeping me calm, but I can tell that something's, like, not. Not right. So we keep going. And I'm almost at an hour of pushing now. And Dr. Seeker goes, this is a 5050 chance of being of adrenal birth. And I'm immediately panicking. Like, I look at my doula, and I'm like, this has to be a vaginal birth. And I don't know why. This was my mindset. I was terrified of having a C section. I'm not sure why I'VE always been a little bit weird about surgery and, like, anesthesia and not that you're put under for C sections, but I was just really nervous, and I was like, no, this has to be vaginal. I'm prepped for a vaginal birth. Like, I am ready. So we keep pushing. And it's funny. Like, in the moment of pushing, it brings out a part of. I can't describe it. I kept looking at him, and I was like, am I doing a good job pushing? Is he okay? Is he okay? What's happening? You just feel really, like, vulnerable, obviously, and it's like a very animalistic feeling of pushing. And I just wanted to know that I was doing a good job and that Kai was safe. But it's exhausting. Like, you're holding your breath for 10 seconds, and it really feels like you need a minute to catch your breath, but they want you to keep pushing. So I'm honestly happy I got the experience of pushing because it was really, you know, it's like that human experience that we all want in a way, and it's something that I personally had always thought about. But then we hit a point where Dr. Seeker was like, we need to call this. His heart rate keeps dropping. He's not tolerating the contractions. He's not tolerating pushing. And for a minute, I was concerned that I was being pushed into a C section that wasn't necessary. So I looked at my doula, and she goes, no, no, no. This is medically necessary. The baby's not doing well. So I'm like, pure panic at this point. I'm like, oh, my God. I can't believe I have to have a C section. It was kind of crazy because I. I was always very adamant about not having a C section. I'm not sure why. And I think it probably has a lot to do with some of the interviews I've done on this show and the studies with C sections and just honestly, like, a fear of them. But I know a lot of people choose to do C sections now, so people really, like, feel one way or the other. But for some reason, it. It caused panic in me. But of course, I was ready to do whatever to make sure the baby was safe. So it happened so, so fast. Within, like, a minute of deciding it was a C section, this entire team comes in. They're putting more medicine in the epidural to numb everything. They're, you know, giving Greg and the duelist hazmat suits and putting surgery, hair nets. And I say to everyone, Please put a speaker next to my ear. I don't want to hear anything that's going on. And I'm going to keep my eyes closed because I was, like, hyperventilating. So they wheel me into surgery. I have a speaker next to my ear playing like, Vandalux. Look him up. Great music. Really a great dj, EDM music. And they wheel me into the room. And the team in there was so friendly, so nice. I'm still not looking at anyone, so I can't see anything. And then they put a sheet up between me and, like, the lower half of my body. And I have Greg and the doula on my side, and I'm, like, holding Greg's hand. And I remember I kept saying, like, babe, don't watch, don't watch, don't watch. Because I'm aware that they're about to slice me open and take my organs out and put them on a table and take the baby out. And Greg's like, no, no, no, I'm watching. For some reason, Greg wanted to watch the entire thing. And he, like, took photo. I haven't even looked at these photos. I'm still not ready. But he literally watched them cut me open and take my organs out, which is insane. Like, I actually can't. Still can't believe that happened to me. But I'm just, like, back there praying, keeping my eyes shut, like, squeezing whoever's hand was there. And then I. Within six minutes, I hear Kai crying and I, like, open my eyes and he's, like, coming towards me over the sheet. And I was just like, what just happened? And I couldn't believe he was real. Like, I know that sounds crazy, but I think maybe every mom experiences this. But just having gone through everything I did to get pregnant and then just seeing him, it was actually the most magical moment of my entire life. Like, look at this. Look at him. And I'm, like, streaming tears down my face. I get him on my chest. Oh, I like it. That moment was so, so insane. Guys. Like, people say that giving birth is addictive. I don't know if anyone's seen that. Like, that moment that you give birth, it is. I, like, I don't think I'll ever have a moment in my entire life that's equivalent to it because it was the craziest moment of my life. And just looking at his cheeks and his eyes and his head, like, look at him. And Greg and I are just staring at him. He was nine pounds, so the second he came out, everyone was like, oh, thank God you didn't push this baby out because he is massive, big nine pound boy, super healthy. They weighed him, he was crying, breathing. Well, thank God. I just kept saying, is he okay? Is he okay? Is he okay? I still had this like, deep fear that he wouldn't be okay, but he was fine. Oh, by the way, see, I'm skipping things because my brain isn't working. This was, I think, 10:50pm So I had been essentially in labor since 8 in the morning. 12 hour labor. And I know some people have it so much worse. Like some people are in labor for days and days and days, which is crazy in retrospect. Like, some people would say that that was a horrible birth experience. I personal, I don't think of it that way. I'm. It worked out how it was supposed to. And I really think the C section was a lesson for me. And I had some people say to me, like, you're gonna have to grieve this. You're gonna have to like, really let yourself be sad about the fact that you didn't have a vaginal birth. Part of me is a little sad that I didn't get to experience, but I also felt like I kind of had both experiences because I was pushing for an hour, he was in the vaginal canal, and then I also had a C section, but I really don't care. And maybe that sounds crazy, but, like, I was just so overjoyed to have a healthy baby that I just didn't care. I was like, he could have come out of my ear and I wouldn't have kid. Like, this was just magical for me. And I think, yeah, a really big lesson for me that, like, I can't, I can't control everything with birth. There's only so much you can prep. I honestly, my biggest piece of advice for someone who's about to give birth would be to let go of expectations, let go of control. You know, tell yourself that you'll be happy either way because it really doesn't matter at the end of the day how the baby comes out. So anyway, they had him on my chest. They wheeled me into a recovery room. And I'm like trying to remember everything right now because I was so out of it at that point. But it was, I think it was like midnight and we were in that recovery area for two hours. So it was getting to 2am but he, I got to breastfeed him right away. He latched right away, which was amazing. I was like, oh my gosh. Like, you know, I didn't get to have the Birth. I wanted. But I'm having this amazing experience with him. Like, I'm literally feeding him right now. He was so loud. I will never. And he is still loud. I will say that because there was other mums in this recovery area. There was just curtains between all of us. And everyone's baby was, like, making, like, little noises. Mine was screaming. Kai was absolutely screaming, and he was so loud. And I remember looking at Gregory being like, do we have the loudest baby of all time? This is deafening. And he's still really loud. So he's just a loud boy. But. Oh, and I. Guys, I skipped a whole thing about my placenta. I'm gonna do a whole episode about my placenta because we did a really crazy process with the placenta with Dr. Amir Mashari. I think I'm saying it correctly. Mashabi, he's actually a labiaplasty surgeon, but he also helps extract stem cells from. From the placenta and does a really interesting process with them, which we'll dive into in another episode. But I knew I wanted to work with him. So we had to remove the placenta and immediately put it on ice with antibiotics to prevent it getting infected and ship it on a plane to his lab to have the stem cells extracted. So that was a whole crazy thing. We had our amazing assistant Brooke, waiting in the waiting room of the hospital to transport the placenta. It was really, really crazy. And props to her because she had to wait for hours after all of what we went through that day. So, anyway, after that, we were wheeled down to our suite. They were out of postpartum suites that day, so they moved us to a completely different floor of the hospital. But it was great. We had a huge room. Greg had a couch to sleep on. Our biggest joke was like, Greg's gonna be so uncomfortable on this couch. He needs his red light. He needs his eye mask, whatever. But he was, you know, he was fine. We had such a lovely team of nurses, like, truly the best at St David's north here in Austin. And obviously, I had a lot more of a complicated recovery than we were anticipating because of the C section. I will say Dr. Seeker did a great job. My incision is literally, like, this big. It's nothing. I can't believe he pulled a 9lb baby out of that. But they, you know, were obviously tending to the. The incision, and you still bleed when you have a C section. You still wear diapers. You still bleed, which is really interesting. But, yeah, that recovery part is the same, but standing up and, like, Sitting down to pee and going in the shower is a bit more like, they want you to be much more careful. Like, they. I don't think they even really let me walk around. Also, I remember the night that we were brought down to that room with Kai. It was like three in the morning and we were. I mean, it's kind of crazy, guys. Like all of a sudden you are entirely responsible for this tiny baby. And I was so exhausted, I couldn't even like open my eyes because after that day, it was a crazy, crazy day. I couldn't stand up. My whole body was itchy head to toe from, I think, I guess from the epidural wearing off or one of the medications that they gave me. So I couldn't even sleep because of how itchy I was. But the nurses were so lovely. They could see how exhausted I was and how exhausted Greg was that they were extra helpful with Kai and really, really stepped in so we could sleep for two hours. I was like, I just need two hours and then I'll be okay. Because I was really at the point where I was like, I'm not going to be like with it if I keep pushing myself. So slept for two hours and then they wake you up a bunch to give you medication for the pain and check on the incision. So the C section aspect was like, you know, a little bit more recovery heavy. But I honestly felt pretty good. Like, I was up on my feet the next day. I was able to lift Kai, change diapers. I think I got myself in the shower at some point. It's all a blur. It is really all a blur. I had a great experience at the hospital. I loved being in a safe environment to figure out taking care of a new baby. I felt really supported and I learned so much about breastfeeding and diapers and development and it just felt like a really great environment to learn things. I was in that room, like, I literally did not step out of that room for three days straight. And I didn't even realize. I was like, oh, my gosh, I haven't even been outside because everything is such a blur. But it was really magical. Like so, so, so magical. Just staring at Kai and having him on me. And our first diaper change, I remember was insane because when the baby's first born, they poop out all this black tar, like sticky tar. And Greg and I were like, oh, my God, what do we do with this? But it was so special. And honestly, a big fear that I had was like, okay, I've never really taking care of a baby for that long. Like I've held a couple of babies but I've never changed a diaper. I haven't done this, I haven't done that. But there really is this like instinctual reaction when it's your baby. You just figure it out. Like for some reason it just feels more natural. It feels like of course you don't know everything, but you just kind of figure it out and it's really fun and exciting and there's so much I could dive into with the breastfeeding, the colostrum, the all of it. There's so much to talk about. But I think I will leave it at that with the birth story and yeah, everything worked out how it was supposed to. I've come to a lot of acceptance and peace with it and I think it was a big lesson for me, a big lesson of like, you know, a lot of my life I've controlled and planned and just worked really hard at. And this is like the one thing where it's like there's not much you can do sometimes and you just kind of have to let go of control. But I feel so blessed and grateful to have Kai and taking him home that day was the craziest feeling ever and being a mum has been really awesome and I can't wait to talk about it more, can't wait to answer some questions and and I hope you guys tune into the next episode. Thank you for joining this one. Just a reminder, if you're not subscribed, I don't want you guys to miss any new episodes. Make sure you follow me on Instagram for updates when new episodes drop and I can't wait for the next one. Bye. Thank you for joining us on the Pursuit of Wellness Podcast to support this show. Please rate and review and share with your loved ones. If you want to be reminded of new episodes, click the subscribe button on your preferred podcast or video player. You can sign up for my newsletter to receive my favorites@marilewellyn.com it will be linked in the show Notes this podcast is a Pursuit Network production brought to you by Mikayla Phillips, Joel Contartese, Daviel Waldner and Mackenzie Meisel. You can also watch the full video of each episode on our YouTube channel at Pursuit of Wellness podcast love you pow girls and pow boys. I will see you next time. The content of this show is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for individual medical and mental health advice and does not constitute a provider patient relationship. As always, talk to your doctor or health team. Lifelock. How can I help? The IRS said I filed my return, but I haven't.
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