Raising Good Humans: Episode Summary
Guest: John Legend on Fatherhood, Music, and Spreading Holiday Joy
Release Date: December 27, 2024

Introduction

In this heartwarming episode of Raising Good Humans, Dr. Aliza Pressman welcomes the multi-talented John Legend, renowned American singer, songwriter, producer, actor, and devoted father of four. The conversation delves into John’s journey as a parent, his passion for music, and the joyous challenges of raising a family during the holiday season.

John Legend’s Early Life and Education

John Legend shares his unique upbringing in Ohio, highlighting his advanced intellectual capabilities from a young age. Due to his precociousness, he skipped two grades and was homeschooled before entering college at the tender age of 16. Reflecting on his early education, John notes:

“I was homeschooled a lot of my youth... I was really precocious. I loved to read, I loved math... By eighth grade, I was two years younger than all my peers.”
[34:53] John Legend

This accelerated academic path, while fostering his intellectual growth, presented social challenges as he navigated school environments significantly older than him. John candidly describes the social awkwardness and isolation he felt:

“I was really socially pretty awkward and behind... Music was always my way of feeling more connected to people.”
[37:12] John Legend

Embracing Fatherhood: Bonding with Children

As a father of four—Luna (8), Miles (6), Esti (2), and Ren (1.5)—John emphasizes his active involvement in his children’s lives. His parenting style is deeply influenced by his musical background, fostering strong family bonds through shared activities:

“I'm very involved. I like playing with them, talking to them about school and homework... All of my kids and I bond over music.”
[02:51] John Legend

He engages Luna through drawing and music, Miles through sports, and fosters creativity in his younger children. John highlights the importance of meeting each child where they enjoy activities, ensuring personalized connections:

“Older ones are already very much into popular music... They go back and forth picking songs for the 15 to 20 minute drive to school every day.”
[06:38] John Legend

Creating a Children's Album: "My Favorite Dream"

Inspired by his role as a father, John embarked on creating his first children’s album, My Favorite Dream. The idea sparked when his wife, Chrissy, encouraged him to learn a simple lullaby for their toddler Esti. This led to positive feedback from their audience on social media, motivating him to expand the project:

“So I decided to just write a children's album, wrote all the songs here at home, surrounded by my family.”
[05:29] John Legend

The album focuses on themes of family, togetherness, emotional processing, and resilience, aiming to embed positive messages in children’s lives through music.

Core Parenting Messages

John emphasizes the importance of creating a supportive and expressive environment for children. His songs address helping kids process their emotions, encouraging imagination, and navigating challenges:

“A lot of the messages in the songs are about family and togetherness... Helping kids process their feelings and feel comfortable being themselves.”
[05:43] John Legend

He outlines his creative process, which involves brainstorming key parenting conversations and translating them into musical themes.

Managing Sibling Dynamics

With Luna and Miles often competing for attention and favor, John discusses the delicate balance of ensuring both children feel equally loved and supported:

“They battle each other... They feel like they have to fight over it.”
[18:22] John Legend

He draws parallels to adult sibling rivalries, expressing his hope that his children will develop strong, loving relationships despite occasional competition.

Dealing with a Child’s Health Diagnosis

A significant part of the conversation centers around Miles’ recent diagnosis with type 1 diabetes. John shares the challenges and adjustments the family has faced, emphasizing resilience and community support:

“We're learning how to be parents of a kid with type 1 diabetes... He's doing well with it, but it's challenging sometimes.”
[21:15] John Legend

He highlights the importance of technology advancements and the support from friends and adults with similar experiences in managing Miles’ condition.

The Importance of Music in Development and Education Advocacy

John passionately advocates for the integration of arts in education, arguing that music and creativity are crucial for holistic development:

“A lot of times we're having to convince policy people how important the arts are... Helping young people become their full selves.”
[14:08] John Legend

He discusses the correlation between music and academic skills, such as math, and the role of arts in fostering self-esteem and creativity:

“Music is highly correlated with math and artistic skills... It all correlates.”
[12:54] John Legend

John expresses frustration over the diminishing emphasis on arts in schools due to the focus on standardized testing and accountability, advocating for a more balanced educational approach.

Reflecting on Giftedness and Social Integration

John reflects on his own experiences as a gifted child and how they influence his parenting. He emphasizes the importance of balancing intellectual advancement with social development, choosing not to rush his children through their education despite his own accelerated path:

“I would side with not wanting to skip my kids ahead... There's no rush to get them through high school.”
[37:43] John Legend

He underscores the significance of social connections and emotional intelligence, lessons he learned through his reliance on music to connect with peers during his youth.

Holiday Traditions and Family Music

Music remains a central theme in John’s holiday traditions, both personally and within his family. He reminisces about singing Motown classics with his family and continues to incorporate music into his children’s holiday experiences:

“We would always gather around the piano and sing together... Music has always been integral to my understanding of what the holidays were.”
[33:28] John Legend

John plans to celebrate the holidays by touring his Christmas album, blending professional performances with family celebrations:

“I'm excited to finally be able to go out and tour the music again... We're going to do a big Christmas in London week.”
[43:14] John Legend

Closing Thoughts

In wrapping up the episode, John reflects on the joys and sacrifices of balancing a career with family life. He expresses gratitude for his supportive family and looks forward to creating more musical memories with his children:

“The rose is I get to tour this December... The thorn is taking time away from my kids and wife.”
[43:14] John Legend

Dr. Pressman and John conclude with mutual appreciation, celebrating the shared commitment to nurturing and raising well-rounded, happy children.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• John Legend on Being Involved as a Father:
  “I'm very involved. I like playing with them, talking to them about school and homework... All of my kids and I bond over music.”
  [02:51]

• Creating His Children's Album:
  “So I decided to just write a children's album, wrote all the songs here at home, surrounded by my family.”
  [05:29]

• Advocating for Arts in Education:
  “A lot of times we're having to convince policy people how important the arts are... Helping young people become their full selves.”
  [14:08]

• Balancing Education and Social Development:
  “I would side with not wanting to skip my kids ahead... There's no rush to get them through high school.”
  [37:43]

• Holiday Traditions with Music:
  “We would always gather around the piano and sing together... Music has always been integral to my understanding of what the holidays were.”
  [33:28]

Conclusion

This episode of Raising Good Humans offers a profound glimpse into John Legend’s life as a parent and artist. Through his stories and insights, listeners gain valuable perspectives on balancing career and family, the pivotal role of music in child development, and navigating the complexities of parenting in today’s world. John’s authentic and heartfelt discussion serves as both inspiration and practical guidance for parents striving to raise compassionate, well-rounded children.