Today we have Aimee. She is 51 years old, from Minneapolis, MN and took her last drink on March 20th, 2022.

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[02:39] Thoughts from Paul:

AA has been the most popular and widely recognized program to treat alcohol addiction for more than 50 years. And that has pleased Big Alcohol because it has the word "anonymous" in it. Big Alcohol knows they are selling an addictive drug, and it is a gift to them that when people figure out that alcohol lies to them about their product, calming them down or enhancing their lives, they won't say anything.

Paul isn't dogging AA but recognizes that the anonymous part had kept the stigma of addiction going. Paul shares and excerpt from As Bill Sees It from Bill W., the founder of AA.

The way he reads it, he doesn't think that Bill W. ever intended the anonymity component to be a curtain of shame. It is just in reference to what is said in the meetings, stays in the meetings.

Gone are the days of keeping it a secret. In the last four years Big Alcohol has lost $830 billion in revenue. We have to keep talking about this. As Bill W. says, it's a tragedy that drinking has been marketed as good for us, but we're starting to get it right.

[08:16] Paul introduces Aimee:

Aimee lives in Minneapolis, MN, works for a large medical device company, is married and has two adult children. For fun Aimee enjoys traveling now that she is in recovery and has been dabbling with art.

Aimee's father was in recovery from alcohol around the time that she was 12 and she remembers the impact seeing him there had on her. Her parents were divorced and she and her mom had a strained relationship. Aimee ended up moving to Minneapolis from Texas to live with her dad and had struggles with bullying in school. Drinking became a way to feel like she belonged in a group.

When Aimee was in her early 20s, her father lost his mother and was very depressed. Aimee feels like she was parenting her dad at that time while she was also getting married and having her own kids. Their children were very active with sports and weekends while the kids were playing, the parents were partying.

Aimee thinks her drinking became a problem around 2018. In 2019, her father passed away. Shortly after he passed, she thought she would quit drinking for a year in remembrance of him. Aimee wasn't sure she could do it, but if she could do it, it would prove to herself that she didn't have a problem.

Without community or AA, Aimee stayed sober for about 15 months. She wasn't interested in AA and didn't have any other resources. Aimee started drinking again and would have multiple stops and starts until 2022 when her husband was about to have open heart surgery.

Knowing the level of care she needed to provide after the surgery, Aimee began seeking other resources to assist with recovery. She hadn't told anyone about her quitting, not even her husband. But she found community and listening to others share helped her feel less alone. There were a lot of things happening within her family that could have made her want to throw in the towel, but being part of the Café RE community helped her.

Aimee says the first year in recovery had her feeling the pink cloud a bit, but years two and three were a little more challenging. However, she is now going back to school since her kids are now adults, and planning travel. Two things she knows she wouldn't be able to do if she was still drinking.

Aimee's parting piece of guidance: just don't quit quitting. You don't have to hold onto shame.

Recovery Elevator

You took the elevator down

You got to take the stairs back up

We can do this

I love you guys

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