Podcast
Relationship Advice
Hosted by Thrive Therapy - Colter Bloxom, Lauren Mokarry, and Cayla Bozovich · EN
Relationship Advice helps listeners uncover the stuck spots in their relationships by taking expert advice from three licensed professional counselors and boiling it down into digestible tips and tools. Colter, Cayla, and Lauren help people to see that the first step to connecting with somebody else is by connecting with you. They focus their show on understanding and navigating the cycles that couples face, how to practice individuation, and staying in an emotionally regulated state. Just them each week as they come with a jam packed agenda to help you thrive in your relationships.
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34episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
Anger in Relationships
3d ago00:59:21Tap to summarizeAnger can feel disruptive in relationships, but it often shows up for a reason: it signals that something important feels blocked, unfair, or violated. In this episode, we explore how anger can either push partners into blame, shutdown, and disconnection, or help clarify needs, values, and boundaries when it’s expressed with regulation. The goal isn’t to get rid of anger, but to understand it, lower its intensity, and communicate it in a way that keeps both people connected. Main Talking Points Anger’s Function Window Of Tolerance Blocked Goals Pursue And Withdraw Naming Anger Repairing Conflict Give Me Discounts! AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Rythm - Get 15% off your first month + free shipping! Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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‘You Can’t Do This’ Is NOT A Boundary
6d ago00:43:29Tap to summarizeIf there is one thing to know about boundaries, it is that a boundary is not about what you need somebody else to do. It is about what you are going to do in response to somebody else’s behavior. Colter, Cayla, and Lauren discuss boundaries from a psychotherapeutic lens and give tools for how to better communicate boundaries. Main Talking Points: Our bodies are the indicator for when we need to set boundaries. Boundaries exist on a continuum, not as binary bookends. Communication of boundaries should be specific to the prioritized need. We should approach boundaries with grace, generosity, and curiosity. Give Me Discounts! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Rythm - Get 15% off your first month + free shipping! Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Withdrawers: When Keeping the Peace Backfires
1w ago00:55:43Tap to summarizeIn this episode, the crew dives into the “withdrawer” role in relationships and how rigid, all-or-nothing responses can quietly create disconnection. They unpack why withdrawers often appease, shut down, or avoid conflict altogether — not because they don’t care, but because disappointing their partner feels intolerable. The conversation explores healthier alternatives to passive or rigid boundaries, including slowing down, using buffer statements, getting curious, and learning how to tolerate discomfort without punishing each other. Main Talking Points: All-Or-Nothing Thinking Passive Boundaries Buffer Statements Tolerating Disappointment Vulnerable Curiosity Flexible Responses Give Me Discounts! AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Rythm - Get 15% off your first month + free shipping! Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. Quince - Get Free Shipping and 365-day Returns using our link! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Before You Pack: The Conversations Every Couple Needs Before Vacation
2w ago00:50:15Tap to summarizeVacation stress usually isn’t about the trip itself — it’s about the unspoken expectations couples bring into it. In this episode, the hosts unpack the conversations that can completely change the tone of a vacation before you ever leave the driveway: money, planning, intimacy, parenting, downtime, technology, and more. They explore how different nervous systems, personalities, and expectations can either create connection or turn a “dream trip” into the same fight in a different location. Main Talking Points: Vacation Expectations Planning Differences Money Conversations Parenting Stress Intimacy Pressure Technology Boundaries Give Me Discounts! AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Kiwi Fodzyme - Get 30% off your first order! Rythm - Get 15% off your first month + free shipping! Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. Quince - Get Free Shipping and 365-day Returns using our link! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Finding Secure Attachment with Trevor Hanson
3w ago00:58:49Tap to summarizeThis week we are joined by Trevor Hanson who shares his personal journey from anxious attachment and relationship struggles to becoming a therapist focused on helping others build secure attachment. He emphasizes that real transformation comes through emotional experiences—not just information—and outlines a structured approach to rewiring attachment patterns. Through practical tools like self-validation, inner child work, and community-based healing, he shows how people can create lasting security in relationships more efficiently than traditional methods. Main Talking Points Anxious attachment patterns Emotional experiences heal Four healing pillars Inner child work Self-validation tools Repetition rewires brain Connect with Trevor: Website Instagram Give Me Discounts! AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Tanasi - Use code “relationship" for 25% off your first order. Quince - Get Free Shipping and 365-day Returns using our link!If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Everything That Comes Before Intimacy with Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith
May 400:50:49Tap to summarizeWhat does “true intimacy” actually mean—and why do so many couples feel disconnected even when they love each other? In this episode, we sit down with Matthew Raabsmith and Joanna Raabsmith, relationship experts and co-authors of Building True Intimacy, to unpack the deeper layers of connection most relationships are missing. We dive into their Intimacy Pyramid™ framework—a powerful model that explains why so many relationships struggle at the foundation and how couples can rebuild safety, trust, and emotional closeness from the ground up. From the tension between secrecy and privacy to the complicated realities of checking a partner’s phone, this conversation gets honest about what actually builds (or breaks) trust. We also explore what happens after betrayal—and whether it’s truly possible for a relationship to come back stronger. If you’ve ever felt stuck, disconnected, or unsure how to rebuild closeness, this episode gives you a clear path forward. Key Takeaways: True intimacy defined Love vs connection gap Intimacy Pyramid basics Secrecy vs privacy Trust after betrayal One small shift Give Me Discounts! AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Quince - Get Free Shipping and 365-day Returns using our link! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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When To End A Relationship
Apr 2700:41:01Tap to summarizeEnding a relationship is rarely about one big moment—it’s usually a pattern that keeps repeating despite effort, conversations, and growing awareness. This episode explores how to tell the difference between normal relationship challenges that can be worked through and deeper signs of incompatibility or emotional disconnection. We talk about what it looks like when one or both partners stop showing up, when the same conflicts keep resurfacing without resolution, and when the relationship begins to feel more draining than supportive. You’ll learn how to honestly evaluate whether growth is still happening—or if staying is quietly costing you more than leaving. Main Talking Points Repeating patterns Emotional disconnection Effort imbalance Core misalignment Growth vs. stuck Fear of leaving Give Me Discounts! AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Quince - Get Free Shipping and 365-day Returns using our link! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Don’t Punish the Vulnerability You’ve Been Begging For
Apr 2000:59:44Tap to summarizeThis episode explores the common relationship dynamic where one partner struggles to share vulnerably, and when they finally do, they’re met with criticism, correction, or defensiveness. The hosts explain how these responses unintentionally “punish” vulnerability and reinforce shutdown patterns, even when connection is what both partners want. They emphasize playing the long game—creating safety through validation, patience, and restraint—so vulnerability can grow over time. Main Talking Points Pursuer vs withdrawer Punishing vulnerability Critiquing delivery Validation first Play long game Create safety Give Me Discounts! AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Quince - Get Free Shipping and 365-day Returns using our link! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Attachment Styles on First Dates (What to Watch For)
Apr 1301:06:14Tap to summarizeThis episode explores how attachment styles subtly show up on first dates and what to watch for without overanalyzing every interaction. The hosts emphasize that instead of trying to “screen perfectly,” the real work is understanding your own attachment patterns and how they influence who you’re drawn to. By noticing communication patterns, emotional pacing, and responses to vulnerability, you can better identify both anxious and withdrawn tendencies early on. Main Talking Points Self-awareness first Conversation balance Emotional pacing Mixed signals Fast vs slow Questions to ask Give Me Discounts! AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Quince - Get Free Shipping and 365-day Returns using our link! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Stop Saying "Calm Down"—Do This Instead
Apr 400:51:36Tap to summarizeTelling someone to “calm down” usually does the opposite—it makes people feel dismissed, misunderstood, and even more activated. In this episode, the hosts explore why that phrase backfires in moments of anger, anxiety, disappointment, or excitement, and why it often comes from the other person feeling overwhelmed too. They unpack a better approach: co-regulation through validation, steady presence, gentler tone, and asking what support actually helps. Main Talking Points: • Validation first• Tone matters• Co-regulate together• Name the feeling• Ask what helps Give Me Discounts! AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. Quince - Get Free Shipping and 365-day Returns using our link! If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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