Lulungomeena by X Minus One

Summary

Relic Radio Sci-Fi Podcast Summary: "Lulungomeena" by X Minus One

Episode Details:

• Title: Lulungomeena by X Minus One
• Release Date: March 3, 2025
• Host: RelicRadio.com
• Description: An adaptation of Gordon R. Dixon's work, "Lulungomeena" takes listeners on a journey through the intricate lives of interplanetary characters aboard Frontier Station 563. The story delves into themes of home, identity, and interstellar justice, culminating in a high-stakes gamble that determines the protagonists' fate.

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1. Setting the Stage

Frontier Station 563: Positioned on the fringes of human-controlled space, Station 563 serves as a melting pot for various interstellar beings. The station's environment is tense, with crew members exhibiting signs of burnout and disillusionment after prolonged service.

Home Planet Lulungamina: Described as the most beautiful planet in the universe, Lulungamina symbolizes home and longing. For Clay Harbank, it's a beacon of hope amidst the desolation of station life.

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2. Introducing the Characters

• Mort Jansky: A Dorsi man, raised on a distant planet a million light-years away. Mort grapples with his past, including a violent incident that has kept him away from his home for 25 years.

• Clay Harbank: A seasoned gambler from Lulungamina, Clay is weary of station life and yearns to return home. His charismatic yet troubled nature sets the stage for conflict.

• The Kid: A young Earthman residing at Station 563, whose antagonistic behavior towards Mort and Clay adds tension to the narrative.

• Dor Lusis: A hicksabrad mercenary political arbitrator from the Arrakis system. Dor's arrival introduces an element of interplanetary law and order.

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3. The Arrival of Dor Lusis

At [00:39], the station is introduced with the countdown for blast off, setting a classic old-time radio sci-fi tone. By [05:47], Mort reveals the strained condition of the station, hinting at underlying conflicts and the arrival of the hicksabrad.

Interactions with The Kid: The Kid's derogatory remarks towards Clay and Mort escalate tensions, leading to a physical altercation where Clay punches the Kid's nose ([11:01]). This incident foreshadows the hicksabrad's impending investigation.

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4. Unveiling Mort's Past

Mort confides in Clay about a dark incident ([15:26]), revealing that he killed a human in a fit of rage 25 years prior. This admission is pivotal, as it explains his reluctance to stay on the station and his desire to return home.

Quote Highlight:

Mort Jansky [15:26]: "I killed a human, Clay."

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5. The Hicksabrad's Investigation

Dor Lusis arrives at [13:08], embodying the hicksabrad's reputation of being unemotional and utterly truthful. His interactions with the crew, especially during dinner ([20:10]), emphasize his role as an impartial arbitrator.

Key Interaction: Mort questions whether Dor knows he's a Dorsi man ([14:22]), hinting at the hicksabrad's potential interest in his past actions.

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6. The High-Stakes Gamble

The Kid challenges Clay to a bet to verify the truthfulness of Clay's claims about Lulungamina, leveraging Dor Lusis as the impartial judge.

Notable Exchange:

The Kid [22:25]: "Do you think you could judge this point, Dhasis?"

Dor Lusis accepts the challenge, leading to a tense moment where Clay's integrity and the beauty of Lulungamina are scrutinized.

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7. The Climax: Truth and Departure

As the gamble concludes, Dor Lusis confirms the veracity of Clay's statements, solidifying their right to return home. The crew witnesses the departure of Mort and Clay aboard the hicksabrad's ship, marking the end of their tumultuous experience at Station 563.

Emotional Farewell:

Clay Harbank [25:29]: "I'm gonna kill that kid."

This line underscores Clay's deep-seated frustrations and the intense emotions that drive the narrative to its resolution.

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8. Themes and Insights

• The Quest for Home: Central to the story is the longing for one's origins, represented by Clay's desire to return to Lulungamina and Mort's internal struggle with his past.

• Truth and Integrity: The hicksabrad's role emphasizes the importance of honesty and the complexities of interplanetary justice.

• Interpersonal Tensions: The dynamic between Mort, Clay, and The Kid highlights the strains of prolonged space service and the psychological toll it takes on individuals.

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9. Significant Quotes

• Clay on Lulungamina:

  Clay Harbank [02:44]: "Lulonga Mina. The very name sounds like music."

• Mort on Gambling Temptation:

  Clay Harbank [06:18]: "I wish you could come with me, Mort." Mort Jansky [22:06]: "They're supposed to be totally without emotion."

• Dor Lusis on Truth:

  Dor Lusis [09:25]: "When a hicks abroad tells you the truth, it's plenty cold."

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10. Conclusion

"Lulungomeena" by X Minus One masterfully intertwines themes of home, truth, and the human (and alien) condition within the confines of Frontier Station 563. Through rich character development and suspenseful plot progression, the story captivates listeners, inviting them to ponder the complexities of interstellar life and the eternal yearning for belonging.

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Production Credits: Adapted for radio by George Lefferts. Featured cast includes Ralph Camargo, Ned Weaver, Jack Grimes, Bob Hastings, and Kermit Murdoch. Directed by Daniel Sutter as part of the NBC Radio Network's production.

Transcript

[Clay Harbank]

Relic Radio.

[Mort Jansky]

This is Relic Radio. Sci Fi Old Time Radio Science fiction stories from relicradio.com Countdown for blast off X/5, 4, 3, 2.

[Narrator]

X minus 1.

[Mort Jansky]

Fire.

[Narrator]

From the far horizons of the unknown. Come transcribed Tales of new dimensions in time and space. These are stories of the future. Adventures in which you'll live in a million could be years on a thousand maybe worlds. The National Broadcasting Company, in cooperation with Galaxy Science Fiction Magazine, presents Minus One Tonight the Longamina by Gordon R. Dixon.

[Mort Jansky]

Blame Clay Harbank, if you like, for what happened at Station 563. Or blame Bill Peterborough, the one we called the Kid. I blame no one. I'm a Dorsi man. That means I was brought up on one of those tiny planets a million light years from nowhere. Being a Dorsi man is quite a responsibility. We are a very polite people. We have to be. Because when we get angry, we fight to the death. It all began that evening that Clay Harbank began reminiscing about his home planet, Lulongamina. We were sitting around the recreation room of 563. There was a card game going on. In one corner.

[Clay Harbank]

Lulonga Mina. The very name sounds like music.

[Mort Jansky]

You know me, Clay. I'm a Dorsi man.

[Clay Harbank]

I've been in the Dorsi planets. I've seen them all knocking around this universe for 35 years. But when it comes to sheer beauty. Lulongomina.

[Mort Jansky]

How long since you've been home, Clay?

[Clay Harbank]

Home? 20 years, Mort. 20 stinking, miserable years. Well, that'll be over soon.

[Mort Jansky]

Another 10 days. You gonna miss old 563?

[Clay Harbank]

Miss this godforsaken little asteroid? Not for a minute.

[Mort Jansky]

I will miss your ugly face around here. At least I will.

[Clay Harbank]

I'm gonna miss your gloomy Dorsi push too. What? Why don't you get out of it? You've had more years in space service than any of us. You've probably got enough credits to get out to me.

[Mort Jansky]

I wouldn't know what to do with myself.

[Clay Harbank]

Couldn't you go home?

[Mort Jansky]

You should know better than that.

[Clay Harbank]

The Denebrian trouble.

[Mort Jansky]

The Denebrian trouble.

[Clay Harbank]

You could go to Earth.

[Mort Jansky]

What for?

[Clay Harbank]

Ever been there?

[Mort Jansky]

Never once. And I've never wanted to. I've seen too many Earthmen.

[Clay Harbank]

The kid over there, he's green, in service.

[Mort Jansky]

He's full of greed and stupid hate like the rest of them. That's not for me.

[Clay Harbank]

Looks are for games breaking up. Here he comes.

[The Kid]

Well, if it isn't the big gambler from the windy planet. What's Its name?

[Clay Harbank]

Lulongomina.

[The Kid]

Yeah. How's the piggy bank coming, dad?

[Clay Harbank]

The piggy is a gentleman, kid. He never overeats so he won't ever get indigestion.

[The Kid]

Sour grapes. You see this water credits 500. How long you have to work for 500 credits, dad? How many trips you have to make around this asteroid? How much closer to falling your grave you have to come.

[Clay Harbank]

You look as if you made a killing.

[The Kid]

I always make a killing. I'm a natural born gambler. And I don't just talk about it like some.

[Clay Harbank]

I think I'll go out and take a turn around the station, Mort.

[Mort Jansky]

Fine, I'll go with you. It's stuffy in here.

[Clay Harbank]

Don't bother. I'd rather be alone.

[The Kid]

Big chef. Knocked around the planets for 35 years. Used to have a reputation as the hottest gambler in the systems. Comes from the most beautiful planet in the universe.

[Mort Jansky]

Why don't you lay off him head? Let me give you a piece of sound advice. Go ahead. Lay off Clay Harbank. He's been around the systems a lot longer than you have. He may not be any chicken, but he's a tough baby when the situation calls for it.

[The Kid]

You trying to scare me, Mark? I thought you Dorsi guys were smarter than that. I'm beginning. No offense, Morty. I mean I wasn't trying to insult the door side people or anything. I gotta go do a flight check. I'll see you.

[Mort Jansky]

We were in bad shape. The 20 of us at Frontier Station. 563 on the very edge of the human area had gone sour. Half the men had applications for transfer in already. What I told the kid about Clay being tough. Well that was a bluff to keep him off. Nobody knew better than I did that Clay was burned out inside like a used up rocket. I put on a spacesuit and went out to join him.

[Clay Harbank]

Oh, hi Moss.

[Mort Jansky]

Hi.

[Clay Harbank]

Beautiful night, huh?

[Mort Jansky]

Nice.

[Clay Harbank]

Back on Lulunga, Mina, on a night like this, the rakesh flowers open up. You can hear them singing. There are six moons and every one of them is like a yellow lantern. My mom and dad and I used to live on the edge of a lotus pool. Here I go talking about home again. Figures.

[Mort Jansky]

Guy who's been saving up for 10 years to get home. Bound to start thinking about it when the time comes.

[Clay Harbank]

I wish you could come with me, Mort.

[Mort Jansky]

Play. Tell me something.

[Clay Harbank]

Yes?

[Mort Jansky]

You ever get the urge to gamble again?

[Clay Harbank]

Do I get the urge to gamble, Mort? You ever watch a man who's been on Pon for a While when he's broken the habit, you can't get him near the stuff. He despises it. Yet the same man is liable to go back on with no provocation. Well, that's the way it is when you've gambled all your life. I figured maybe that's why I keep talking about home. Every time I hear the kid flipping those cards in the recreation room, I start talking about home. Have you noticed?

[Mort Jansky]

I've noticed.

[Clay Harbank]

This time I'm going to make it more. I tried three times before. This time I've got the dough and I know I'm going to make it.

[Mort Jansky]

Think you will, Clay?

[Clay Harbank]

You know, what did it mean? That's what saved me this time. The thought of that beautiful planet.

[Mort Jansky]

Well, when you get there, you can send me a phototape. At the rate we get visitors, it should reach me in five or six years.

[Clay Harbank]

You'll be out by then. You'll be home.

[Mort Jansky]

I'll never go home, Clay. Never.

[Clay Harbank]

Well, that's Red 4.

[Mort Jansky]

Screens must have picked up a ship in the galaxy.

[Clay Harbank]

Maybe we'll get a visit, keep us.

[Mort Jansky]

From going logo anyway. Coming in?

[Clay Harbank]

No, I think I'll stay out a while.

[Mort Jansky]

I'm going to check the screen. See you later. Red 4 meant simply that a ship was entering the galaxy. The chances of it touching down on 563 were pretty remote. Unless it happened to need a clearance for Earth or Mars. The screen was black by the time I got there, but the kid was filing a report.

[The Kid]

Oh, hi, Mort. Hey, what's a hicksabrad like?

[Mort Jansky]

Why?

[The Kid]

We're having one for a visitor.

[Mort Jansky]

You don't say.

[The Kid]

I just came in over the receiver. What'll he be like?

[Mort Jansky]

A hicksabra. Stiff as a poker, proud as Lucifer, honest as sunlight and tied as a camel on his way through the eye of a needle.

[The Kid]

What do they look like?

[Mort Jansky]

Oh, they're kind of humanoid, but they have a deadpan face that never changes. Like a mask.

[The Kid]

They were a little scary.

[Mort Jansky]

I hear that's a green skin. And the scales also, they run about 8ft tall. I wouldn't tangle with one if I were you. Back on Denebria, once I saw a hicksabroad rip Amanda ribbons with its claws.

[Clay Harbank]

Why?

[Mort Jansky]

The man made the mistake of insulting Hicksa. That's one of the twin planets they come from.

[The Kid]

Pretty touchy, aren't they?

[Mort Jansky]

Not really. They're a very level headed race. You know the hicksabroad reputation, don't you? No.

[The Kid]

You didn't hear much about him on Earth.

[Mort Jansky]

Well, they're the first and only mercenary political arbitrators in the known universe. Hicks about can be hired, but he's absolutely incapable of being influenced or bribed. He tells the cold truth and nothing but the cold truth. And brother, when a hicks abroad tells you the truth, it's plenty cold.

[The Kid]

Really lets you have it.

[Mort Jansky]

There are small race and very much in demand. If some kind of political dispute comes up from planetary to inter alien, both sides hire a hexagra to represent them. That way they know the other side is being completely honest.

[The Kid]

That's very interesting, you know. Very interesting.

[Mort Jansky]

I could tell there was something on the kid's mind, but of course I didn't know what it was. Most of the talk in the recreation room that night centered around the arrival of the hicks abroad. Landing beacons were turned on and we waited for another radio communication.

[The Kid]

Hey, anybody want to sit in on this next hand?

[Dor Lusis]

What?

[Mort Jansky]

No, thanks.

[The Kid]

Well, I know better than to ask the galaxy's foremost gambler here.

[Clay Harbank]

That's right, kid.

[The Kid]

Maybe when this Hicks of Rod gets here, we'll be able to work up a decent game. Do hicks of Rods gamble?

[Clay Harbank]

No, kid, they don't gamble.

[The Kid]

That's too bad. Well, we can always sit and listen to you lying about what a beautiful place La Lungamina is.

[Clay Harbank]

Kid, you just went too far.

[Mort Jansky]

Yeah?

[The Kid]

You're gonna do something about it.

[Clay Harbank]

That's right. I'm gonna punch your little nose.

[Mort Jansky]

Break it up. Break it up.

[The Kid]

Why?

[Mort Jansky]

You all right? I'm.

[Clay Harbank]

I'm okay.

[Mort Jansky]

You better get to the infirmary. Have your mouth taken care of. Kid, you get to your quarters.

[The Kid]

Since when are you giving orders?

[Mort Jansky]

I'm telling you to get to your quarters. You better do what he says, kid. He's a Dorsi man.

[The Kid]

That's all I've been hearing since I got here. With big gamblers come from Lungamina and how Dorsi men are killers. So far I seen nothing, but I heard a lot of talk.

[Mort Jansky]

You're gonna get to your quarters. I'll give you five seconds to start moving. You better go ahead, kid.

[The Kid]

Okay, Morgan. I'm letting you bluff me out of the game this time. Just remember, there's going to be other games. Next time I won't be bluffed.

[Mort Jansky]

He left the recreation room. I felt a slight and not unpleasant shiver run down between my shoulder blades and my eyes were still hot. I'd almost lost my control that time, and my senses told me I'd better be careful. For the next three days, the tension of 563 was almost unbearable. Clay Harbank seemed to age 20 years after the kid knocked him down.

[Announcer]

Now hear this, all personnel. Now hear this, all personnel. A ship is approaching for flight check. A ship is approaching for flight check. Report to Central. Report to Central.

[Mort Jansky]

Well, this is it, Clay. We're getting the hicks abroad.

[Clay Harbank]

Seems almost like home having a hicks abroad with us. They're all over the Tarsian system, you know. Speak Higs abroad, you have to on lulungomina.

[Mort Jansky]

I didn't know that. I picked it up during the third exploration.

[Clay Harbank]

Long time ago, huh?

[Mort Jansky]

We're not getting younger, Clay.

[Clay Harbank]

Yeah, I found that out.

[Mort Jansky]

I don't think it's so big. He's just a punk kid.

[Clay Harbank]

Sure, and I'm just a dumb old man.

[Mort Jansky]

That's touchdown. You ought to be here in a minute. That does it. He's down.

[Clay Harbank]

Look at that ship, huh?

[Mort Jansky]

Let's go. You'll need some help with his baggage. The ship was a silvery one man job. The kind that have taken the Hicks of rods all over the universe. The cabin door slid back and the Hyksa stepped out. He was as green and scaly as a lizard. But there was a certain unmistakable dignity in his bearing. Since I spoke the language, I was the first to greet him. Belt the Hutchin hicks abroad. Welcome to this place.

[Dor Lusis]

I greet you, Dorsi man.

[Mort Jansky]

My name is Mort Jansky.

[Dor Lusis]

I am called Dor Lusis.

[Mort Jansky]

Come, I'll show you to your quarters.

[Dor Lusis]

Thank you.

[Mort Jansky]

How. How long will you remain here?

[Dor Lusis]

Only for one night. I wish clearance for Marge.

[Mort Jansky]

I'm sure it can be handled this way. I wondered how he knew I was a Dorsi man. And then it seemed obvious. I broken nose. The scars aligned face. Nobody could mistake a human from the Dorsi planets.

[The Kid]

Still, it scared me a little.

[Mort Jansky]

I kept wondering if he had anything to do with Interplanetary Police. I tried to put it out of my mind. It was no use. Mind if I come in, Clay?

[Clay Harbank]

Sit down, have a smoke?

[Mort Jansky]

Thanks.

[Clay Harbank]

Where's the hicksabrot?

[Mort Jansky]

In his room getting cleaned up for dinner.

[Clay Harbank]

Strange guys, aren't they?

[Mort Jansky]

There's something even stranger going on.

[Clay Harbank]

What's that?

[Mort Jansky]

The kids in there with him.

[Clay Harbank]

With the hicks. What do you suppose they're talking about?

[Mort Jansky]

I don't know. Wish I did.

[Clay Harbank]

Kids. Probably trying to get the hicks into a dice game.

[Mort Jansky]

I doubt it.

[Clay Harbank]

What's on your mind, Maud?

[Mort Jansky]

Hey, you've been around. Are there any hex abroads in Interplanetary Police?

[Clay Harbank]

A few. Why?

[Mort Jansky]

I don't know. I just had a feeling. You know.

[Clay Harbank]

You're dreaming up Bogeyman, maybe. Besides, you're not in any trouble outside the Dorsi system.

[Mort Jansky]

I killed a human, Clay.

[Clay Harbank]

Not deliberately.

[Mort Jansky]

In a rage.

[Clay Harbank]

Happens all the time on Dorsai, doesn't it?

[Mort Jansky]

Not to an officer of Intergalactic.

[Clay Harbank]

Besides, that was 25 years ago.

[Mort Jansky]

There's no statue of limitations in the systems.

[Clay Harbank]

Nobody knows but me. Right.

[Mort Jansky]

You don't have to be clairvoyant to wonder why a man hasn't been back to his home planet for 25 years.

[Clay Harbank]

You think the kid.

[Mort Jansky]

I don't know. He's got no love for me.

[Clay Harbank]

Still, he doesn't know anything. How would he know this Hicksabrat is an agent? If he is?

[Mort Jansky]

Couldn't say.

[Clay Harbank]

Where are you going?

[Mort Jansky]

I'll take a look at that message the kid filed. The one we got when we first picked up the hicks abroad on the screens.

[Clay Harbank]

Let me know what you find, if anything.

[Mort Jansky]

I walked through the empty corridors to the communication center. I went directly to the files where incoming messages are kept and flick the tab until I got to notices of arrivals. There, two days before was a report of the arrival of Dorlasses. I ran my finger down the statistics until I came to the line that said point of origin of flight. It read Tarzan Galaxy. That was where Clay Harbank's Lulonga Mina was. I read further where it said nature of business. My blood ran cold as I spelled out the words criminal, Welterhache and Hicksabrad.

[Dor Lusis]

I greet you, Dorsi man.

[Mort Jansky]

Is there anything you require?

[Dor Lusis]

Nothing, thank you.

[Mort Jansky]

I came to tell you that we'll have dinner tonight at 800 hours.

[Dor Lusis]

The young earthman has already informed me.

[Mort Jansky]

There'S a shortage of raw meat here.

[Dor Lusis]

I've brought my own food, thank you.

[Mort Jansky]

I see you came in from the Tarjan planets.

[Dor Lusis]

Yes.

[Mort Jansky]

You didn't happen to be in the Dorsi planets before that?

[Dor Lusis]

No.

[Mort Jansky]

I thought perhaps you might have some news.

[Dor Lusis]

I came from Intergalactic Headquarters.

[Mort Jansky]

Yes, I. I saw your flight check.

[Dor Lusis]

Then you know my mission. Yes. Good.

[Mort Jansky]

How long do I have to pack?

[Dor Lusis]

I will be leaving at 700 hours tomorrow morning. Can you be ready by then?

[Mort Jansky]

Yes, I guess so.

[Dor Lusis]

Good.

[Mort Jansky]

I don't suppose there's any point in appealing to you, Igsabra. They're supposed to be totally without emotion.

[Dor Lusis]

There is no point in appealing.

[Mort Jansky]

Funny thing. I've been running away from this moment for 25 years. And now that it's come, I'm glad. We'll be going back to the door sites?

[Dor Lusis]

Yes, to Intergalactic Headquarters.

[Mort Jansky]

All These years home. I don't suppose a hicksabrad knows what that feeling is like.

[Dor Lusis]

I will expect you at 700 hours. Now, if you don't mind, I wish to prepare my food.

[Mort Jansky]

One thing.

[Dor Lusis]

Yes?

[Mort Jansky]

Did the young earthman tip you off about me?

[Dor Lusis]

No.

[Mort Jansky]

I could have sworn it was him. That was that. When a hicks abroad tells you no, you can bet your life he isn't lying. I began to wonder how they locate him. I began to wonder what he and the kid had talked about. I began to wonder a lot of things. Well, he's an agent for Intergalactic.

[Clay Harbank]

Well, that doesn't prove he's after you.

[Mort Jansky]

He is.

[Clay Harbank]

How do you know?

[Mort Jansky]

I just talked to him. Lord in heaven. Ah, it isn't so bad, really. Just think I'll be going home.

[Clay Harbank]

I'm gonna kill that kid.

[Mort Jansky]

Clay.

[Clay Harbank]

I'm gonna kill him.

[Mort Jansky]

Clay, listen to me. The kid didn't turn me in.

[Clay Harbank]

You said.

[Mort Jansky]

I said he was talking to the hicks. I just asked him and the hicks told me it wasn't the kid. They don't lie, so don't go blowing off.

[Clay Harbank]

It's going to be hard. 10 days.

[Mort Jansky]

Doesn't have to be 10 days.

[Clay Harbank]

What do you mean?

[Mort Jansky]

How many credits do you need to buy your way out?

[Clay Harbank]

Another 500 next payday.

[Mort Jansky]

Don't wait.

[Clay Harbank]

Don't wait.

[Mort Jansky]

I have over 900 credits. I'll turn them over to you. Mort, listen, I don't need them. You can pay off tomorrow and fly as far as the Tarzan chain with me in the hicks.

[Clay Harbank]

It's a very nice thing, Mort. You do it. I'll think about it, let you know after dinner.

[Mort Jansky]

I thought of running away, but there was really no place to run once they tracked you down. And the hicks abroads were utterly relentless. Once they'd agreed to bring a man in. Since they had no feelings, they made no judgment. They were absolutely certain that a man would get a fair trial. I packed my stuff and went into dinner. The hicksabrad was at the head of the table, eating his raw chinsu meat past the gravy.

[The Kid]

Please do our losses. Yes, they tell me that the Hicksabrad home planet is a very beautiful place.

[Dor Lusis]

It is true.

[The Kid]

I'm from Earth myself. Yes, I'm curious to know what this beautiful planet of yours looks like.

[Clay Harbank]

The kid's pretty talkative tonight. What's cooking?

[Mort Jansky]

For now know, but I don't trust it.

[Dor Lusis]

The flora and fauna are maintained in excellent natural balance. No local surplus has exceeded 1% of the normal population for the last 60,000 years. Life on Hixa is predictable. The weather is controlled within the greatest limits of feasibility. Symmetry of the landscape is without parallel in the universe.

[The Kid]

Very pretty picture. Very attractive home world. But I regret to inform you door lassies. That I've been given to understand that it pales into insignificance when compared with another beauty spot in our universe.

[Dor Lusis]

Your Earth.

[The Kid]

I wish I could say yes. No, no. This place is so wonderful I doubt if an Earthman like me could get in. In fact, I've never seen it, but I've been hearing about it for some months now. And either it's the most wonderful place in the universe or the man who's been telling me about it is a rotten liar.

[Clay Harbank]

Get your gun kid, get your gun.

[The Kid]

Why guns?

[Clay Harbank]

You call me a liar?

[The Kid]

Why use guns when it's possible to prove the thing one way or another with complete certainty? For months now you've been telling me two things. One, that you used to be a gambler. Two, your precious Lulungamina is the most wonderful place in the universe. The question is, is either statement true?

[Clay Harbank]

They're both true. You'll back them up with my life.

[The Kid]

I'm not asking you to back them with your life. Just back them with that nice little horde you've been accumulating all these years.

[Mort Jansky]

No, you don't.

[The Kid]

Well, you said you were a gambler. Bet with me and prove it.

[Clay Harbank]

Suppose I do. How do we prove my statement about Lulungomina?

[The Kid]

It's easy. We have with us at this table a hicksabrad. In a conversation with him, I found out that he's just visited every planet in the Tarsian chain. Now, as everyone knows, a hicksabrad never lies. Do you think you could judge this point, Dhasis?

[Dor Lusis]

The point can be judged.

[The Kid]

Well, gambler.

[Mort Jansky]

Hey, it's a trick. Don't bet.

[Clay Harbank]

How much will you bet, kid?

[The Kid]

All I got the equivalent of 10 years pay.

[Clay Harbank]

Well, you're on.

[The Kid]

Door losses. Okay if I question you?

[Dor Lusis]

Proceed.

[The Kid]

You've been to the planet Natasha Chain, which this man calls his home.

[Dor Lusis]

I must ascertain the position of the planet.

[Clay Harbank]

The fourth planet.

[Dor Lusis]

Ah yes. One with six moons.

[Clay Harbank]

That's it.

[Dor Lusis]

I've been there recently, as you well know. Since we spoke of it only this afternoon.

[The Kid]

We did speak of it. That's true. Now will you tell me? You. You know the planet?

[Dor Lusis]

Yes.

[The Kid]

You know its geography?

[Dor Lusis]

I do not repeat myself.

[The Kid]

Is it a large planet?

[Dor Lusis]

No.

[The Kid]

Is it a rich planet?

[Dor Lusis]

No.

[The Kid]

Was there not a rain of radioactive fallout from an explosion of a nearby star only five months ago?

[Dor Lusis]

There was.

[The Kid]

It did not destroy every piece of vegetation and leave this planet a gutted smoking ruins, charred and ugly.

[Dor Lusis]

It did.

[Clay Harbank]

Well, gambler, you haven't asked him the main question yet. Kid.

[The Kid]

Would you like to ask him?

[Clay Harbank]

All right, Hexabrite. The question to be judged is this is Lulongomina the most beautiful and the most wonderful place in the universe.

[Dor Lusis]

Yes, it is.

[Mort Jansky]

What?

[Clay Harbank]

Well, kid, that's a trick.

[The Kid]

It's a rotten trick.

[Narrator]

I don't believe it.

[Mort Jansky]

The hexes. The eyes of the Hixapod were narrow and baleful as he pushed back his chair. You could almost feel them burning as he dragged his scaly feet over toward the kid. He stopped about 6 inches from the kid and held both his hands up, palms near the kid's eyes. There was a clicking sound and we watched 11 sets of gleaming razor like claws shoot up from the tips of the hicksabrad's fingers. Their points were almost against the kid's eyes.

[Dor Lusis]

Look at my hands, Earth man. Are they not clean?

[The Kid]

Yes.

[Dor Lusis]

Do you doubt that I have told the truth?

[The Kid]

No.

[Dor Lusis]

Then there is nothing further to discuss. I bow to you, gentlemen. I thank you for your hospitality. You will excuse me.

[Mort Jansky]

We stood around and watched that proud, frightening figure drag itself out of the room. The kid was trembling like a leaf as he drew a bank draft for 10 years pay and handed it to Clay Harvin. The next morning Clara, Clay and I boarded the Hicks Abroad ship and four days later we touched down at the outer planet of the Tajin chain.

[Clay Harbank]

Well, this is where I get off more. I. I don't know what to say, really. I guess you know how I feel.

[Mort Jansky]

Like I do. Clay, let's just say so long there.

[Dor Lusis]

Will be no need for goodbyes.

[Mort Jansky]

What?

[Dor Lusis]

Both of you are leaving the ship here? But I thought I. I intend to return to Intergalactic Headquarters empty handed.

[Mort Jansky]

Empty handed?

[Dor Lusis]

But.

[Mort Jansky]

But they' what will you tell him?

[Dor Lusis]

The truth, of course. But you have told me nothing. But I assume I am not interested in your assumption. You asked me my mission. I told you it was a criminal investigation. You said you assumed you would go back with me. And I told you when my ship was departing. There is nothing more to be said.

[Mort Jansky]

But surely you know.

[Clay Harbank]

Don't say anything. A hicksabrat deals only with facts. What is absolutely known. They're the most literal beings in the universe.

[Mort Jansky]

Let it go with that.

[Dor Lusis]

Goodbye, gentlemen. I am grateful for the pleasure of your company.

[Mort Jansky]

Five minutes later Clay Harbank and I shook hands at the exit of the SPACeport on Tarsus 10. But before we parted, there was one thing I had to know. Clay, one thing before you go.

[Clay Harbank]

Yes?

[Mort Jansky]

How did you know the Hicksabad would lie about Lulunga Mina?

[Clay Harbank]

He didn't lie, Mort. A hicksabrad never lies.

[Mort Jansky]

But Lulonga Mina.

[Clay Harbank]

Mort, let me tell you something. Lulunga Mina is a word in use throughout the Tarsian planets. Actually, it's a Hicksabrad word. It means home. All I did was ask the hicks abroad if home was beautiful. He simply said yes. And the hicks abroad, as everybody knows, doesn't lie.

[Narrator]

You have just heard X Minus One, presented by the National Broadcasting Company in cooperation with Galaxy Science Fiction magazine, which this month features the Finn O'Donovan novelette bad medicine, the story of a robot therapist that never failed to affect a cure, even if it had to convert itself into a Typhoid Mary to do so. Galaxy magazine on your newsstand today. Tonight, by transcription, X minus 1 has brought you Lulongamina, a story from the pages of Galaxy, written by Gordon R. Dixon and adapted for radio by George Lefferts. Featured in the cast were Ralph Camargo, Ned Weaver, Jack Grimes, Bob Hastings and Kermit Murdoch. Your announcer, Fred Collins. X Minus One was directed by Daniel Sutter and is an NBC Radio Network production.