Kidnapping Khadijah!

Summary

ReLiving Single Podcast: Episode Summary – "Kidnapping Khadijah!"

Podcast Information:

• Title: ReLiving Single
• Hosts: Erika Alexander and Kim Coles
• Episode: Kidnapping Khadijah!
• Release Date: August 6, 2025

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1. Episode Overview

In the "Kidnapping Khadijah!" episode of ReLiving Single, hosts Erika Alexander and Kim Coles dive deep into the Living Single Season 1 Episode 12, titled "Crappy Birthday." This episode centers around Khadijah's unconventional birthday celebration, where her friends surprise her with a road trip to Atlantic City. Erika and Kim unpack the episode's humor, character dynamics, and the broader cultural implications it holds.

2. Main Storyline: Birthday Trip to Atlantic City

The episode "Crappy Birthday" showcases Khadijah being taken on a surprise trip to Atlantic City by her friends. Erika and Kim humorously dissect the premise, highlighting the chaos and comedic elements that ensue.

• Surprise Road Trip:

  • Erika: "She's still protesting, but she's blindfolded... [09:04]."
  • Kim emphasizes the hilarity of Khadijah's reluctance: "Being kidnapped by the IRS for, like, the many hours without... [08:53]."

• Character Dynamics:

  • Khadijah's friends push her out of her comfort zone despite her protests, showcasing the strength of their friendship.
  • Erika shares a personal take on surprises, aligning herself with Khadijah’s dislike for them: "I don't want you surprising me because let me in on the planning... [05:26]."

3. Behind the Scenes and Personal Anecdotes

Erika and Kim intertwine personal stories with their analysis of the episode, providing a richer context to their discussions.

• Erika’s Experience with Celebrities:

  • Erika recounts her interaction with Flip Wilson and Ed McMahon, highlighting her admiration and the warmth they exhibited: "He was so kind and so gentle... [23:14]."

• Star Search Memories:

  • Erika reflects on her time as a contestant on Star Search, sharing insights into her early career struggles and triumphs: "I was a contestant on Star Search... [23:38]."

4. Discussion on Comedy Tropes and Representation

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to exploring how comedy in Living Single both reinforced and challenged stereotypes, especially regarding body image and gender roles.

• Body Image and Weight Jokes:

  • The hosts discuss the delicate handling of weight-related humor in the show, appreciating Latifah’s role in steering clear of fat jokes: "Latifah kind of made it really clear... [09:54]."
  • Erika shares her own struggles with weight in the industry, emphasizing the importance of authentic representation: "It's funny, there's nothing wrong with Latifah's weight... [10:16]."

• Men in Supervised Roles:

  • Kim and Erika analyze the trope of men being portrayed as inept when left to manage household tasks, questioning its origins and impact: "Men Unsupervised Equals Chaos... [12:05]."

5. Reflections on Variety Shows and Their Cultural Impact

The conversation shifts to the influence of variety shows like Flip Wilson’s on television and comedy, drawing parallels to modern programming.

• Historical Context:

  • Erika highlights the groundbreaking nature of Flip Wilson’s variety show, noting its role in showcasing Black talent: "Flip Wilson was the first black person to have their own variety show... [20:28]."

• Modern Comparisons:

  • The hosts compare past variety shows to contemporary formats, such as Black Lady Sketch Show, praising the evolution yet recognizing the lost art of such programming: "These shows were centered places where you could come and... [32:10]."

6. True Blue: Listener Questions

In the "True Blue" segment, Erika and Kim engage with listener questions, providing entertaining and insightful responses based on the Living Single characters.

• Hypothetical Twitter Accounts:

  • They humorously speculate how characters like Sinclair and Max would navigate social media, highlighting potential mishaps and online personalities: "Sinclair on Twitter would be a disaster... [41:04]."

• Regine’s Thirst Traps:

  • Kim and Erika imagine Regine’s savvy use of Twitter for self-promotion, blending humor with character analysis: "Regine would be shopping on Twitter... [43:11]."

7. Conclusion

Erika Alexander and Kim Coles wrap up the episode by reflecting on the enduring legacy of Living Single, its relevance in today's cultural landscape, and the importance of celebrating friendships and personal growth. They encourage listeners to engage with the show's community, share their stories, and continue reliving the moments that made Living Single a beloved classic.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Erika on Surprises:

  "I don't want you surprising me because let me in on the planning... [05:26]"

• Kim on Body Image:

  "It's a fat joke... [09:40]"

• Erika on Flip Wilson:

  "He was so kind and so gentle... [23:14]"

• Discussion on Comedy Progressiveness:

  "Comedy is inherently progressive. It's not conservative... [40:28]"

• True Blue Listener Question:

  "If your characters had access to Twitter, would they be problematic and how often do you think they'd go viral or do you think they would get banned? [27:18]"

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Final Thoughts: The "Kidnapping Khadijah!" episode of ReLiving Single offers a nostalgic yet critical look at Living Single, blending humor with meaningful discussions on representation, friendship, and the evolution of comedy. Erika and Kim's engaging dialogue ensures both longtime fans and newcomers gain valuable insights and entertainment from each episode.

Transcript

[Erica Alexander]

Coming up on reliving single Atlantic City. Baby, I thought I was a scourge.

[Kim Coles]

I was like, oh my God, you can see them crawling.

[Erica Alexander]

You can see you were driving. You would so rock a little gold lemon jacket.

[Kim Coles]

Well, I, you know, if I was drunk and high.

[Erica Alexander]

Here come the judge.

[Kim Coles]

Here come the judge. You said you weren't good at horror stories. This is horror. Everybody's itching in the studio and they shake the car.

[Erica Alexander]

So waterbed. I got crafts.

[Kim Coles]

What?

[Erica Alexander]

Stormy Daniels told me that I did a show with her. Surreal Life. I did the Surreal Life. We were in Mexico for two weeks. She's awesome. And she said there are no fluffers in porno. There's nobody actually fluffing.

[Kim Coles]

That's a load off.

[Erica Alexander]

No pun intended. Let's start the show.

[Kim Coles]

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[Erica Alexander]

Welcome back to Reliving Single, the official unofficial Living Single Rewatch podcast. Woo.

[Kim Coles]

Okay, we're checking out Living Single Season 1 Episode Crappy Birthday Season 1 Episode 12 here's the story. This week it's Happy Birthday Khadijah. Woohoo. A road trip for the girls who take Khadijah to the ac. You know what that means?

[Erica Alexander]

Atlantic City, baby. Right.

[Kim Coles]

For people who don't understand. Not in the air conditioner. It's ac. It's Atlantic City. And in America's playground, Frugal Khadijah loses all her inhibitions in the casino and goes all in until it all falls down.

[Erica Alexander]

And then there's a B story. That's right. Meanwhile, back in Brooklyn, Overton and Kyle House sit while the girls are away. Now what could go wrong with that? And we have some amazing co stars this episode. I mean legends and legends and legends. The great Flip Wilson, actor, comedian and variety show King. And Ed McMahon, who I have a personal story with.

[Kim Coles]

Thank you. Wow.

[Erica Alexander]

Yeah.

[Kim Coles]

Hopefully not a stormy. A stormy story.

[Erica Alexander]

A good story. It's time for the rewind where we watch and relive living single with you.

[Kim Coles]

Look, I'm celebrating my birthday right here. Just sit at home, chill, watch tv. Oh snap. You're whining already. What are you doing? You're gonna go if it kills you.

[Erica Alexander]

Are you going to kill me? I didn't even pack a bag yet. Don't you worry, I packed one for you. I'm not gonna even ask what that was in your sock drawer. Come on.

[Kim Coles]

So surprise. Here's the birthday that you did not ask for.

[Erica Alexander]

Right?

[Kim Coles]

Yeah. Suck it up, Suck it up.

[Erica Alexander]

And that's not very celebratory.

[Kim Coles]

I know, I know. But you know, that's what friends do. I think, you know what she's. You have to push her along.

[Erica Alexander]

Right? Right. She says no in a big. A full body weight.

[Kim Coles]

A full body weight. No. One of the things I really noticed looking at, you know, this, this clip is how good Latifah is in her body in terms of physical comedy.

[Erica Alexander]

Very much so.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah. It's not said enough that when you lift her up and you say you, but you gotta go. And she lifts her own self up very elegantly.

[Erica Alexander]

Yeah.

[Kim Coles]

I mean, she's always sort of like leaning into things.

[Erica Alexander]

Right.

[Kim Coles]

And I just love.

[Erica Alexander]

She brings it all, she brings it all to the party. So we're about to take this trip and obviously, do you see how many bags Regine brought down? Like, how long is she planning on staying? What is she taking?

[Kim Coles]

Back in the day, people used to pack for like cruises because you were crossing the Atlantic. She's like, she's crossing the Atlantic.

[Erica Alexander]

She's crossing from Brooklyn to New Jersey.

[Kim Coles]

Exactly. She's looking for a bridge.

[Erica Alexander]

Right.

[Kim Coles]

I think that Khadijah, again, going back to her frugal days. She just also doesn't have time.

[Erica Alexander]

And I don't need a big fuss made. I don't like surprises. I'm like Khadijah in that way. Don't surprise me. Cause I think I would plan it better. So I don't want you surprising me. Because let me in on the planning. Cause I'm gonna plan it well and have it laid out the way I want it to be. I really don't like surprises. So no one has ever taken me on a surprise birthday trip.

[Kim Coles]

And nobody's ever done anything when you said no, and they did it anyway. Has that happened?

[Erica Alexander]

That has happened. The good news is that it's ej and he knows me well enough. And I go, this was a good surprise. Cause he knows what I like and what I don't like. So something like this. I don't even think Khadijah would enjoy Atlantic City. I think the girls planned it. Cause they wanted it.

[Kim Coles]

And that's the thing. So I think that that's what happened. That friends use your birthday or your, you know, special days to suddenly make an excuse to be like girls. We have to dress a certain way. We all have to wear.

[Erica Alexander]

All wear white, all wear black. Right? Like, right.

[Kim Coles]

I ain't got time for that.

[Erica Alexander]

My point of view is that every day is your birthday. Every. Why do we wait till one time of year to celebrate ourselves or have someone celebrate us? Like, every day can be your birthday. Although birthdays are special. Like my 16th birthday, I remember being really special. That was back in the day where they would give you a corsage with like, Tootsie Rolls on it or something. Or candies. Tootsie Rolls. Oh, yeah, I had Tootsie Rolls. And I had, you know, right here and then. And I gave Tootsie Roll to my very special friends. I only had 16 of them. So, yeah, you can have one. There you go.

[Kim Coles]

So back in the day, passing like a drug dealer at school.

[Erica Alexander]

Here you go. Exactly. Just to the very special ones. So that was my favorite. Do you have a favorite birthday of yours?

[Kim Coles]

No. Well, actually, my 50th birthday was really pretty awesome.

[Erica Alexander]

I believe I was there. You got surprised.

[Kim Coles]

I got surprised. And you saw I cried like maybe for a clear 45 minutes.

[Erica Alexander]

Yeah, it was good.

[Kim Coles]

It was really good.

[Erica Alexander]

And you really were surprised.

[Kim Coles]

You didn't know I Had no idea. And people had flown out for it. You were there. And I think the way it was planned because, you know, it was my boyfriend, but he had invited all my past.

[Erica Alexander]

Like, my ex husband's boyfriend was there. Erica has a great relationship with ex boyfriend, so, like, you know, husband number one, boyfriend number one.

[Kim Coles]

There was only one number one. As if there's five. Yeah, they were all there.

[Erica Alexander]

It says a lot about you that you have these great relationships with these great men.

[Kim Coles]

I like to think so.

[Erica Alexander]

I have a memory of you looking over at your boyfriend and just beaming. Thank you. And gratitude and love. And I'm gonna put it on you later on. And thank you. And just staring at him like, please, I got busy tonight.

[Kim Coles]

Did my lips do this?

[Erica Alexander]

Yeah, you did. You did. You were like, mm.

[Kim Coles]

Oh, well, I do. Yeah, well.

[Erica Alexander]

And he was so proud that he pulled it together, and he did a great job. So.

[Kim Coles]

Yes, great job. And they were all sorts of love, and so I appreciate that. I don't like surprises, but that was well done. I think if we don't start celebrating these special moments, we. When are we gonna do it?

[Erica Alexander]

Right now is the time.

[Kim Coles]

Max, does your car always ride this bumpy? That's all your designer luggage in the back.

[Erica Alexander]

My luggage isn't that heavy. Something's weighing this car down.

[Kim Coles]

Y' all better not be looking at me. Okay, so the girls hit the road. They've hit the road with Khadijah, by the way. She's still protesting, but she's blindfolded. She sat up there in the car blindfolded, which is hilarious. I don't know if I could sit there, like, I'm being kidnapped by the IRS for, like, the many hours without.

[Erica Alexander]

Being able to reach up my hands and take off the blindfold.

[Kim Coles]

Take off the blindfold.

[Erica Alexander]

How long would it take to drive from Brooklyn to Atlantic City? Like, at least an hour and a half, two hours or so. Right? There you go.

[Kim Coles]

Good.

[Erica Alexander]

And so she's sitting there with a. With a blindfold on it that she could reach up and cut. Take off. But maybe there's a respect. I'm just going to go along for this ride.

[Kim Coles]

Well, that's what she does. She's pretty game for it. No matter what she's saying or protesting, she's. She's down for the shenanigans, and that's nice. And I think that. Do you think. Cause we've talked a little bit about it, that. That bumpy ride thing. Cause they blame the bumpy ride on the luggage, and then they said, well, something's weighing down in the car.

[Erica Alexander]

And we all turn and look at her, and y' all better not be.

[Kim Coles]

Looking at her at Khadijah. So is that like a subtle. It is. Joke about weight?

[Erica Alexander]

It is, isn't it?

[Kim Coles]

Yeah, it's a fat joke.

[Erica Alexander]

And we didn't do a lot of that on this show. And I'm grateful that we didn't do a lot of that on this show. Cause I gained weight, and we can have a whole conversation about that. I'm surprised at that we let that one go.

[Kim Coles]

Well, I think that that one was one of the ones that went by. But then Latifah kind of made it really clear, like, look, we're not going to be doing that. And then they really disappeared. And it's funny, because that's a sort of cheap comedy trope that you could do is just keep making fun of people's weights and things like that. And there's nothing wrong with Latifah's weight.

[Erica Alexander]

So I would get a call every beginning of every season to my manager saying, kim Coles has to lose some weight. She has to lose some weight. She has to lose some weight. And I remember having this conversation with some guy friends, and they go, there's no man in America that would kick any one of y' all out of bed. Which is a really, really crude way to say it. But I think what was beautiful about us is there were four completely different body types, and we looked like women that everybody knew in our community. But there is a expectation by these, you know, suits in an. Of what. What they think sexy is. And so I had a really hard time as I was gaining weight and feeling as if everybody was staring. And there was this moment where Latifah was like, no, we're not gonna do this. And then it wasn't brought up anymore. And I told you won't remember this, but I told you that. They threatened me and said, if you keep gaining weight, we're gonna have to start writing fat jokes. And you said, I won't read those jokes.

[Kim Coles]

I said that to you? Yeah.

[Erica Alexander]

Executive said it to my manager. We have to include. She wouldn't be gaining all this weight, and her friends wouldn't say anything. And we're gonna have to lose some weight or we're gonna have to start writing fat jokes. And I brought it to you, and you said, I won't read those jokes.

[Kim Coles]

No, no. Who's gonna say them? No one would. You have to have willing collaborators. But, you know, the Sad part is they got in your mind, because I do remember that you went on a very sort of concerted effort throughout, you know, the series, throughout the rest of the years to keep the image that they wanted.

[Erica Alexander]

Right.

[Kim Coles]

Man, would you look at this place?

[Erica Alexander]

Isn't it amazing the way women keep.

[Kim Coles]

Their apartments so neat just for themselves? Hey, you're not really gonna watch tv, are you?

[Erica Alexander]

Overtime. They won't even know we're here.

[Kim Coles]

Unless I spill a big glass of red Kool Aid right there. Oh, my God. They're house sitting and they're messing up the house already.

[Erica Alexander]

House sitting or house wrecking? How dare they?

[Kim Coles]

Yeah, and there's this thing, it's called Men Unsupervised Equals Chaos. It's an actual thing that you see in comedy and in sitcoms, you know, the bumbling husband. What? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So do you think that that's a stereotype and did that to men feeling like if they were left at home, they would not be good at watching the house?

[Erica Alexander]

You know, I wonder if it comes off of the time where women were at home and they were taking care of the home, and men didn't know where the thing. And presumably he was off at work, off at the office, and she ran the household, and he ran everything that was going on outside the house. And maybe when left at home with the children alone, he didn't know what to do. So maybe it comes out of something that's truthful. Of course, men are capable. I remember when my father was left to babysit us or to make breakfast for us. It was great. Cause it was very, you know, he was a Marine, so it was very organized and very well done. And so maybe it's a comedy trope because it is, because we think men run the world, and really, women run the world. So maybe that was just a play on this.

[Kim Coles]

I know, but the problem is that if you extend it into how we got here, say, with talking about masculinity, and there's certain types of traditional roles versus untraditional roles. The truth is, if you look back in the day, no one had a maid. No one had somebody come and clean, you know, and if you lived on a farm, you know, you worked on a farm, maybe there were certain things that, you know, the men did versus the women being, you know, saying cooking and that. But I didn't see it. I saw people who were keeping their head above water. Everybody was doing everything, and they had to be able to take care of themselves. They had to be able to know how to take care of the baby if the mother was gone. But then it became something that I think people started to. That men start to lean into that, like, well, I don't do that. And it takes a certain type of man to understand when you're actually being fed a narrative and you can reject the narrative. But a lot of those things, I think they resonate because people embrace them and don't even know where they got those thoughts. But I think that a lot of these types of things we see in television that are storytelling are also end up raising us. And then we wonder where we got them from. But I think we got them from, like, television. You have to go now, don't you? Yeah. You're just gonna have to put nature's call on hold. We're almost there. That's what my mother used to say.

[Erica Alexander]

Until that unfortunate incident in the backseat of our new Cutlass Supreme.

[Kim Coles]

Get out. There's a ditch right over there. I'll only be a minute. Hey. Hey. You guys want to have a little fun with Sinclair? Why'd you have in mind?

[Erica Alexander]

That's a horrible, horrible joke. Well, to leave me in the middle of the night.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah.

[Erica Alexander]

Off the side of the road in Jersey.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah. That's what friends do. That's what friends are for.

[Erica Alexander]

Very unkind. You'd think somebody would really do that to you. You couldn't do that today. Oh, gosh, that would be horrible.

[Kim Coles]

I think it's horrible.

[Erica Alexander]

And she drove off fast enough that she got some distance.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah, it's hilarious. I mean, they went off on the same next exit and got her. Came got her.

[Erica Alexander]

Oh, you think they rolled all the way up the road? I think Sinclair grabbed her drawers and was running. Running back to the car.

[Kim Coles]

I hope so. I hope so. You know what I'm saying? So the road trip is pure chaos.

[Erica Alexander]

Pure chaos.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah. There you go. There are very few times that we're in a car.

[Erica Alexander]

Very few times.

[Kim Coles]

But there's. The car is on set, and then they have a green screen and. Or something that they project.

[Erica Alexander]

Right.

[Kim Coles]

And that looks like it's a driving scene. And then the prop people come and they shake the car while we're driving.

[Erica Alexander]

And I think it's like. Isn't it like some planks or something?

[Kim Coles]

Just push the car.

[Erica Alexander]

Maybe they've upgraded it now, and there's actually a machine that does it. I bet you there's a guy going, pushing, pushing. And sometimes they take the, you know, the lights and just do this. Yeah, you know, just over here.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah, that's the magic of Hollywood. Cause, you know, people think. Some people think it's so glamorous, but it's so not.

[Erica Alexander]

So not.

[Kim Coles]

Do you think Sinclair was pissed that they. They left her?

[Erica Alexander]

She was pissed that she was left.

[Kim Coles]

I bet you she wasn't. She said, hey, guys, did you remember I was out there? Oh, no, we didn't. Sorry, man. All right, they gotta get to Atlantic City. Let's get there.

[Erica Alexander]

Let's get there.

[Kim Coles]

Khadijah, you're my dear friend, and it's your birthday, and you're sick, and I know it's wrong for me to feel this way, but. Max, go gamble. Thank you.

[Erica Alexander]

What are you doing? I'm putting on my makeup. Why else do you think there's a mirror up here? To watch yourself sleep.

[Kim Coles]

Think. Think.

[Erica Alexander]

Hey, that's what's up the hi Jinks.

[Kim Coles]

Yep. So they're there. And I think that realizing that Max has sort of hooked her into coming to Atlanta. Sea is one thing, but that hotel room is awful looking.

[Erica Alexander]

And we're not staying at a posh place either. You know, we're staying at, you know, something that's.

[Kim Coles]

Could be in the Poconos.

[Erica Alexander]

Right.

[Kim Coles]

Right.

[Erica Alexander]

Not the best of.

[Kim Coles]

Not the best.

[Erica Alexander]

And then there's a waterbed in the room.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah.

[Erica Alexander]

And a mirror on the ceiling.

[Kim Coles]

But, you know, waterbeds were big. I don't know who did it, who sold this, but it was like somebody figured out, oh, it's supposed. Waterbed's supposed to be better for your back, better for your sleep. They were awful, horrible, horrible.

[Erica Alexander]

And you could hear the water sloshing. So the waterbed, you know, lure. No. No pun intended, was that it was great for your back and it was.

[Kim Coles]

Gonna flow and great for your emotions. There you go.

[Erica Alexander]

That's sexy. So that was the lure. And so I finally had an experience on a waterbed with the movement of the ocean, which is a. Not good if you've had a cocktail or two. Cause I.

[Kim Coles]

It was a guy with that.

[Erica Alexander]

A guy that I was dating or thought that I was dating. And this. We were gonna do the deed on this water. I got crabs.

[Kim Coles]

What? Kim?

[Erica Alexander]

Waterbed.

[Kim Coles]

I got crabs from the waterbed.

[Erica Alexander]

I don't know if it was him. I don't know if it was the waterbed we were on, because maybe the water bed.

[Kim Coles]

Water. Crabs. Crabs swimming down the water.

[Erica Alexander]

It was a college experience. I thought I was a scourge. I was like, oh, my God.

[Kim Coles]

You could see them crawling.

[Erica Alexander]

You could see them. You were jiving your head. See the Horrible. I was in college.

[Kim Coles]

I died.

[Erica Alexander]

I remember itching down there.

[Kim Coles]

Stop playing.

[Erica Alexander]

Why am I itching? What's going on? And a little crab on my thigh. And I was like, stop playing.

[Kim Coles]

Stop playing. I thought, did it look like a crab?

[Erica Alexander]

It looks like a little tiny crab.

[Kim Coles]

Was it good while it lasted?

[Erica Alexander]

No.

[Kim Coles]

Do you remember?

[Erica Alexander]

It wasn't even a good night. It wasn't even a good night. How horrifying. It was a guy that was.

[Kim Coles]

You said you weren't good at horror stories. This is horrible. My God. Everybody's itching in the studio.

[Erica Alexander]

And by the way, hotels like this is where you.

[Kim Coles]

By the way, let's be clear.

[Erica Alexander]

Let's talk about bedbugs and crabs. Without a doubt, this is exactly the place you catch. Exactly where.

[Kim Coles]

You know what?

[Erica Alexander]

Now when I travel, I take that bed. Brook spray.

[Kim Coles]

I bet you do. Sinclair, go keep her busy. And.

[Erica Alexander]

And.

[Kim Coles]

And we'll take you to see Boardwalk and Park Place. Okay? Okay. I'm back in action. We're Max and Regine now.

[Erica Alexander]

Max and Ma. Where?

[Kim Coles]

They're.

[Erica Alexander]

They're. Oh, M. Wilson. Mr. Wilson. Mr. Wilson.

[Kim Coles]

Right. It's my cousin Khadijah's birthday, and she's.

[Erica Alexander]

Such a big fan of yours.

[Kim Coles]

Well, happy birthday. And you have a nice day, okay? Thanks, Flip.

[Erica Alexander]

Can you do it for us? Here come the judge. Just once, please?

[Kim Coles]

I don't do that anymore. Oh, of course he doesn't do that anymore. What about Geraldine in Atlantic City? Honey.

[Erica Alexander]

Yes, yes, yes. I didn't want to come to Atlantic.

[Kim Coles]

City, but the devil made me do it.

[Erica Alexander]

Flip Wilson, he was the first black person to have their own variety show. And it was the number one show for a while.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah.

[Erica Alexander]

And in this scene, I'm asking him to do one of his famous lines. He had several lines, and one of the characters was, you know, here come the judge.

[Kim Coles]

Here come the judge.

[Erica Alexander]

And he said no, but he did give us his famous Geraldine line. And Geraldine was a character that he did, you know, in a wig, in a full dress and lipstick.

[Kim Coles]

That's. Flip's famous alter ego is Geraldine. Geraldine, Geraldine.

[Erica Alexander]

Devil baby.

[Kim Coles]

Do it, honey. Black, funny.

[Erica Alexander]

She was strong.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah.

[Erica Alexander]

So there's the great Flip Wilson willing to play with us. So he said yes to come on the show, but he was fully willing to play and let me snatch him around. And I told him how much of a fan I was of him and that I had done standup as well. And he was lovely. And I love that these devices have showed up for me to keep distracting Khadijah which is what you all wanted me to do.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah.

[Erica Alexander]

These devices in the form of people.

[Kim Coles]

What the hell is gold lame? Right?

[Erica Alexander]

Golden May, the pantsuit.

[Kim Coles]

If you looked at Earth, Wind and Fire, Gap Band, cameo, all those things.

[Erica Alexander]

That'S how they dress.

[Kim Coles]

Everybody was dressed like that. That. Those boots that go up high, which.

[Erica Alexander]

By the way, is back in so much style.

[Kim Coles]

Back in the day. Didn't they have it so much style?

[Erica Alexander]

You know, I wonder if those now become classics, because I love gold and gold lame and a little. A little biker jacket like that. Would you rock that? Now me a gold. Maybe not the whole suit, but would you? You would so rock a little gold lame jacket.

[Kim Coles]

Well, I. You know, if I was drunk and high.

[Erica Alexander]

Happy birthday to me.

[Kim Coles]

You have just broke the house record. I'm so glad I'm your best friend.

[Erica Alexander]

Me too.

[Kim Coles]

Me too.

[Erica Alexander]

Me too. Khadisha James.

[Kim Coles]

Epic.

[Erica Alexander]

Man, this is your lucky day. I'm here to inform you've just won the American Family Publisher Sweepstakes grand prize, $1,000,000. This is the most amazing day of my life. Yeah, it's too bad it's all a dream.

[Kim Coles]

She survived it.

[Erica Alexander]

She did.

[Kim Coles]

It was all a dream.

[Erica Alexander]

It was all. All of it was a dream.

[Kim Coles]

It was. It was.

[Erica Alexander]

I did meet Flip Wilson, didn't I?

[Kim Coles]

You might have. You may not have. So it's a bust. It was no Flip. There was no Egg McMahon. Ain't no money. So we got to give props to Yvette Lee Bowser because one of the things she did was a revolving door of amazing talent. And this is an example of that with Ed McMahon and Flip Wilson.

[Erica Alexander]

We must have been really hot for Flip Wilson to come and say yes. And Ed McMahon, who had been, you know, legendary for being Johnny Carson's sidekick and the host of Star Search, and I got to meet the man. I did Star Search. I did it in the comedy competition. I won one show and lost the very next show by a quarter star.

[Kim Coles]

So wait a minute. You were a contestant. You weren't a judge. You were a contestant?

[Erica Alexander]

I was a contestant on Star Search.

[Kim Coles]

Did he remember you?

[Erica Alexander]

He did remember me. And what's beautiful about him, I saw him on a. Not only was he kind to me, on Living Single, I ran into him on a plane, and he was like, hey, Kim Coles. I was like, mister, you remember me? He said, I remember all of my stars. And he was so kind and so gentle. He said, I remember all of my. No, I remember all of my kids. I remember all of my kids. He couldn't have been more generous and more lovely and more classy. And I was a guest judge on the reboot of Star Search. With Arsenio hall resurrected, I got to go back to my roots in that deep.

[Kim Coles]

You came out as a contestant, and you accomplished so much that in later years, you came on as a judge.

[Erica Alexander]

Even though I lost the second show by one star.

[Kim Coles]

But you won in life.

[Erica Alexander]

I won in life.

[Kim Coles]

Isn't that like Jennifer Hudson?

[Erica Alexander]

Right.

[Kim Coles]

She didn't win that. Ended up going to get the Oscar. Fantasia won. I mean, that's amazing.

[Erica Alexander]

That's an example of, you know, you go for something and you think that that's the path you're gonna take in order to win. Exactly. And the winning actually comes a completely different way.

[Kim Coles]

Right.

[Erica Alexander]

And the way it's meant to happen.

[Kim Coles]

Deserve to win, but both in their own ways. Ooh.

[Erica Alexander]

You never know.

[Kim Coles]

Never give up. Wow. It doesn't seem real now. It really doesn't. But there's so much to say about what's changed between then and now. Well, let's get into it. Let's get into the reverb.

[Erica Alexander]

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[Unknown]

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[Erica Alexander]

This is the reverb Our time to reflect on the episode's themes and how they still echo throughout the culture. So how do you celebrate your birthdays?

[Kim Coles]

I usually just chill unless TC Is involved. Sorry.

[Erica Alexander]

Well, you know, so. So in case you all don't know, Erica and TC have the same exact birthday. And so there have been epic birthday celebrations that I thought the two of you planned together.

[Kim Coles]

If no, it wasn't, he'd come up and say, yeah, baby, our birthdays are coming and I've got something great planned. No, nothing for you to do. Nothing for you to do. Just show up, baby. And I'm like, but I don't wanna. And then he would just, you know, make it happen. But he's in that way. I think that that's where our stars don't align. He might be birthday twins.

[Erica Alexander]

Well, he loves to entertain, too. He loves inviting people to his home. Like I said, if you've ever seen Christmas at TC Christmas and Thanksgiving at TC Carson's house is a celebration. Yeah. So every day.

[Kim Coles]

Has anybody ever invited you, like, to a road trip?

[Erica Alexander]

No, I don't.

[Kim Coles]

They haven't taken you anywhere?

[Erica Alexander]

Well, I've been, but not for my birthday. I mean, if I was dating, you know, a certain suitor. Yes, but no one's ever kidnapped you. I don't like surprises. I'm like Khadijah in that way. Don't surprise me. Cause I really want. Cause I think I would plan it better. So I don't want you surprising me because let me in on the planning, because I'm gonna plan it well and have it laid out the way I want it to be. I think one of the things that we have in common is I don't get the sense that we have a fear of aging or there hasn't been a birthday that I was like, I don't want to celebrate it because I don't want to get old. I embrace every age and every stage.

[Kim Coles]

Right. I don't need no Eat, Pray, love moment.

[Erica Alexander]

Right.

[Kim Coles]

But it's Nice if it happens. Actually, you know what? When I turned 30, I kind of freaked out a bit. Oh, okay. And I didn't know. And it came upon me, and I was kind of, you know, feeling anxious and stressed. And my husband, my one husband at the time, Tony, we went for a walk toward the beach. And I sort of, you know, allowed the universe to kind of wash over me. I look at myself and say, are you out of your mind? Like back in the day, people trip over birthdays when they're 30, when they should have been bracing those.

[Erica Alexander]

Please.

[Kim Coles]

That's not the birthday to trip over. But we just don't know when our mind's gonna shift and go, wow, I don't know if I'm ready and I haven't done enough and I'm not. And you start to really blame yourself or feel pressure to do something else.

[Erica Alexander]

I haven't met that age yet. 65 might do that for me. It's coming up. I haven't met an age. I'm like, oh, I think part of it has to do, too, with having great representation of those ages and stages. I have had great aunties that aged beautifully. You did your aunt like, whether they had wrinkles or so.

[Kim Coles]

I met them when they were older, but they were more fabulous than anybody I ever met that was young. You know, it just shows you from cradle to grave. You should really work on your personalities, your skill sets and communication, whether it's languages and all of that, that really serves you well. Not so much your accomplishments, but how you can create relationship and strengthen and navigate the world. Navigate the world. So then there's Flip, and Flip is the iconic man. We started talking about him a little bit before, but in the variety space, you were talking about that he made history and the types of things he did. But there's a lot of people who came through that door. When we think about dei, they talk about it just in terms of whether it's race or something or being black. But there's much more about what that means. And in the space of, I guess, labor and employment, you think of the Hollywood space sometimes as being segregated. But variety was a space that often those people collided.

[Erica Alexander]

Here's the thing. I think that with especially variety shows at that time, if the dividing rod was, are you funny?

[Kim Coles]

Come on.

[Erica Alexander]

The reckoning was, are you funny? And is this something that the audience will laugh at? I think these are shows that would not make it today.

[Kim Coles]

Well, people are afraid of everything now. And that, to me, just kills any experimentation. Because if you think about It. He had activists like Muhammad Ali up and through that mug. Right. But he had also the great singers, Aretha Franklin, Gladys Knight.

[Erica Alexander]

It was like these centered places where you could come and where America could tune in and listen. There are households and there are neighborhoods that had no people of color, but you could tune in and see the beautiful Diane Carroll singing a song or Aretha Franklin, like you said. And even the Sonny and Cher show created spaces where they had black dancer on the show. I was on one of the best. Living color was the one that came back, and Kenan took from Laughin and Dean Martin, and he said he wanted dancing girls there. He had the fly girls. He borrowed from all of that era. And Fox was like, oh, this is gonna be a hit. And it was. So would you say that Flip Wilson was the Arsenio hall before there was Arsenio Hall? It was a precursor to that, for sure.

[Kim Coles]

There's no doubt about it.

[Erica Alexander]

This kind of shows also that. That families would sit down and watch.

[Kim Coles]

Yes.

[Erica Alexander]

Together. You know, grandma, all the way down.

[Kim Coles]

That's right.

[Erica Alexander]

Including, you know, little kids could sit and watch. And even though you didn't understand some of the, you know, some of the innuendo, it was there for. There for you.

[Kim Coles]

It's a lost art. And there should be, I think, more opportunities in the mainstream to do things like that. Like the Jerry Lewis telethon you were in.

[Erica Alexander]

I got a chance to do a guest spot on the Jerry Lewis telethon.

[Kim Coles]

And it's influenced so many things, like morning shows, the roasts. The roasts were variety shows, in a way.

[Erica Alexander]

Oh, please. I lived. And the roast before they turned mean. Like, the roasts are mean.

[Kim Coles]

They're really mean. Now.

[Erica Alexander]

I don't want to do that. I wouldn't want to do one, nor would I want to be the subject of a roast. Back in the day, they were, you know. You know, you would tell stories about someone, but you don't even know if they were true or not. They were just. They were funny and saucy and wonderful.

[Kim Coles]

Dean Martin has that great roast. It was unreal.

[Erica Alexander]

That's what it came from.

[Kim Coles]

Who's the great insult comedian who we love so much?

[Erica Alexander]

Don Rickles. I got into an elevator with him once with his wife, and a bunch of us got on. He said, oh, honey, the black people are here. Hide your purse. I was not offended, because that's what he did. He made fun of Jewish people. Cause he was Jewish. He made fun of black people, and he was friends with all of them.

[Kim Coles]

That's Right. And that was his job. That was his job, is to do that.

[Erica Alexander]

And none of us got offended at that time. Today, he would be canceled.

[Kim Coles]

He wouldn't even be allowed. He wouldn't even be allowed. And he was the best at it. I think one of the gifts you have is that you can come into a room and you immediately can connect people. You do it in an opposite way. You say something. Something a little saucy, but you always flirt. Hey, Daddy, looking good. Daddy, you're looking good.

[Erica Alexander]

Make people feel good. But every one of us, when we walk into a room, we have an idea of what we think someone is like or what they're going through. And I think when I like to connect everyone and we're all on the same plane where we're human and we're lovely and we're light, and if putting myself in this place makes you feel more comfortable and let's do it, then you feel lifted and gifted.

[Kim Coles]

I think this is where we get our morning shows and the late night. All of that stuff is good stuff. And they did a lot of great work doing that. And I love it with that the Geraldine Jones character that I thought, famously, there's a store that I thought that he'd stopped doing it, that he. It was taking up too much of his life. But then there he was doing it.

[Erica Alexander]

He was willing to do it on.

[Kim Coles]

Our show, Yvette Lee, but without the.

[Erica Alexander]

Wig, without the just saying the famous line.

[Kim Coles]

And so there's a discussion about, you know, the type of female impersonator that he was. And when they say men in dresses and the people, the performers that use that and have created these iconic characters that built their career. So what's kind of the history and the. And that space and the reinvention and also the rebellion.

[Erica Alexander]

The reinvention and the rebellion. So it's a big conversation because we've got conversations about men in dresses. Milton Berle, Jack Lemmon, you know, all the white stars who have dressed up. Jack Lemmon and Tony Curtis in Some Like It Hot is one of my favorite films. And I have no charge about these men dressed up in dresses. And it was funny. It was well written.

[Kim Coles]

Yes.

[Erica Alexander]

But let's go back. It's important to have this context that there was a time when in theater and certainly in Shakespearean times where women weren't allowed on stage, men dressed up in dresses to portray women.

[Kim Coles]

They absolutely did.

[Erica Alexander]

Whether it was high comedy or whether it was playing a serious dramatic role. There were no women who were allowed.

[Kim Coles]

No.

[Erica Alexander]

So there's a history of men dressed up as women in performing.

[Kim Coles]

So there's a difference between that and what's being discussed nowadays. And people are afraid of. And there's a lot of censorship in terms of that because they get confused. Performers have always played different characters. That's called character work. And you see it in Miss Doubtfire, you see it in Tootsie. I do a lot of that stuff on stage. I was in plays like the Mahbarata with Peter Brook and Joseph Papp. And that was what you did at the Public Theater. At the Public Theater, Meryl Streep played Hamlet. And I just love that because you're right, it does come from all those times that women were forbidden to be on stage.

[Erica Alexander]

But now let's get into men dressed as women. There's a new conversation now, especially around black performers. Black men dressing as women and doing these female roles.

[Kim Coles]

Right. Are they held to it? Do they have a different burden?

[Erica Alexander]

There's a, you know, a rumor or rule that if a black man is willing to put on a dress and dress up as a woman in a role, that is the sure fire way to stardom. That. That is what the industry. The industry says, put on a dress and we'll make you a star.

[Kim Coles]

Right?

[Erica Alexander]

And, you know, there's a lot around that. Could there be freedom from Milton Berle to dress up as a girl and make fun of a girl? But now, you know, when a black man does it, it has a whole other weight to it. Now there's this conversation like, please don't do that, or please don't emasculate us that way. And there's plenty of black men who say, I'll never put on a dress. That is not.

[Kim Coles]

I won't.

[Erica Alexander]

I just won't make it that way. And so that's.

[Kim Coles]

I think it's loaded. And I think that one of the reasons why it's loaded is people don't talk about it.

[Erica Alexander]

I think we are talking about it.

[Kim Coles]

We're talking about it, but people are afraid to talk about it outside of being politically used as a thing to punt around when it's time to scare people or make them afraid of people who are in marginalized situations. And let's be clear, those communities are marginalized. And there is something to say about how we speak in those spaces.

[Erica Alexander]

I wanna go back to something you said. You said that we're not talking about it, but I think there's a huge conversation about black folks deciding whether or not they want to see men in dresses or not so there are people who love Madea and people who don't like Madea for that reason. So I do think.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah, no, I do think we're talking about it. Absolutely. It's not always in the healthiest way. It's usually at a point where people are, I think, providing information.

[Erica Alexander]

Name calling or something.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah.

[Erica Alexander]

What does it mean about your manhood.

[Kim Coles]

From a space of fear as opposed to. Let's talk about how we're in this space in a western colonized world.

[Erica Alexander]

I think.

[Kim Coles]

Yeah, that's a thing. But, Kim, you got to play in this show, and I guess we'll get to it at some point. A man.

[Erica Alexander]

Yeah, sure do.

[Kim Coles]

Jimmy.

[Erica Alexander]

Jimmy.

[Kim Coles]

So it's not the same thing for women. No, that's what I'm saying.

[Erica Alexander]

There are men who feel emasculated by. Who feel. It is emasculating when a man dresses that way. That in order to work, this is what you have to do in order to make it. But that doesn't happen for. I read up on Flip Wilson's development of Geraldine, and it was done out of a place of respect and love for this woman. It was based on a girl that he had a crush on who gave him. Didn't give him the time of day. And so Geraldine was actually strong and had a boyfriend named Killa. And she was a little flirty and she was sassy, and she was an empowered woman. And as a kid, it didn't bother me. I didn't even think about this character being something that wasn't allowed. I thought it was funny. I thought, you know, it was empowering. And Geraldine reminded me of strong women that I liked.

[Kim Coles]

But I guess it depends on, again, who you are and how you're seeing it, Right? Like, to me, it's play. And I think that we're here on Earth as humans to have these experiences and not to be afraid of having them because we think that we might offend. The problem is we don't get to divine how that person goes into the space. And that's when it can be. It can be difficult. But there's this new generation, Generation next. They are doing great work in comedy. They are leaders and they're fearless, and God bless them. People like Z Way Robin Thede, a.

[Erica Alexander]

Black lady sketch show. Shout out. I ran into her at the airport recently.

[Kim Coles]

Go Shout out the Sherman show. That's the Alo Riddle. She does a show here at Heartbeat. One song. Awesome. Awesome, dude. Mikayla Cole. I will destroy you. She will destroy you. She's so good. She's so talented, bless her. You know, these people are, I think, progressive, and I think, in a way, comedy is inherently progressive. It's not conservative. Why do you think that? I mean, the people who do well in comedy usually are the progressive.

[Erica Alexander]

We are the mirror for society, and we say what others can't or won't, but we know what they're thinking. I think comedians say what people are really thinking and are bravely saying what people are afraid to say.

[Kim Coles]

And.

[Erica Alexander]

And one of the things I learned about comedy early on is that the perspective is that you're taking what's taking society and you're turning it a little bit on its side and saying, look at it from this perspective or look at it from this perspective or look at it through the lensing of my childhood. And so we're the great historians. There. I've said it.

[Kim Coles]

I love it.

[Erica Alexander]

It's time for True Blue. You know, True Blue. It's the time where we talk to you, where you talk to us, where you ask us a question, and we so generously answer and tell you all the truth, all the time. True Blue.

[Kim Coles]

All right, so this is from Stacey B. From Detroit. She asked if your characters had access to Twitter, would they be problematic and how often do you think they'd go viral or do you think they would get blind? I think Sinclair on Twitter would be a disaster.

[Erica Alexander]

Okay.

[Kim Coles]

Only because I could see her saying something and not meaning to get into something. But I think for the most part, wouldn't you be sending rainbows and love and that type of thing?

[Erica Alexander]

The same things I do now on Twitter and all the other. You know, I'm not on Twitter anymore. Cause it's X.

[Kim Coles]

This is how my mother got in trouble on Twitter. She would put, lol, lots of love. But then it was laughing out loud. So somebody had said that their parent or someone had died, and she said, lol. And my sister called her and said, mom, why did you say lol? What do you mean, lots of love? She's like, no, it's laughing out loud.

[Erica Alexander]

Laugh out loud.

[Kim Coles]

I'm sorry. Do you think they took. No, Mom, I'm sure they didn't. Big laughing out loud. And so she got off the Book of Faces, as she called it. I'm getting off the book of Faces.

[Erica Alexander]

I think a lot of times, you know, the written word has gotten folks in trouble in that way. So I think it would. I think it would get Max in trouble because Max would be that weaponized, that bad boy.

[Kim Coles]

But it would be. But by the Way. I think because she was a lawyer, she'd know. Don't ever write anything down that you can't defend. But, Kyle, their Twitter battle, that right there would be one for the antics.

[Erica Alexander]

It would be epic.

[Kim Coles]

It would be epic. And I don't think Khadijah would do anything except for buy my magazine. Right, that's it. Exactly. But to me, the problem is that you might send out something she didn't mean, and next thing you know, she's cleaning it up. I don't hate to say it.

[Erica Alexander]

She would make sense.

[Kim Coles]

What about Regine, though? Would she be shopping?

[Erica Alexander]

Can you shop on the Twitter?

[Kim Coles]

Your wares out, Putting your wares out?

[Erica Alexander]

You have thirst traps. Yes, yes, she would. Thirst traps.

[Kim Coles]

Yes. And signaling to people. Well, I was just at Barney's and like that type of thing.

[Erica Alexander]

I sometimes wish that social media was around during Living Single. Not even sometimes. I wish that it was around.

[Kim Coles]

Why? For the audience.

[Erica Alexander]

For the connection to the audience and for the connection to, you know, to answer these questions in real time, to, you know, to promote the show. I think the show would have been even stronger and bigger, and I think the network would have seen how much more of an impact that we really had. For sure that. Yeah, I kind of wish that that was the case.

[Kim Coles]

Yes.

[Erica Alexander]

Yeah, that would have been nice.

[Kim Coles]

I agree. I think that tools are really lovely.

[Erica Alexander]

In the right hands.

[Kim Coles]

In the right hands. That would have been us.

[Erica Alexander]

That would have been us.

[Kim Coles]

Thanks for this question.

[Erica Alexander]

Thank you. And listen, you want your questions answered, we're here for you. Submit your questions to reliving single podcastartbeat.com.

[Kim Coles]

Right. Exactly.

[Erica Alexander]

We'd love to hear from you and give you thoughtful answers.

[Kim Coles]

Well, that's it, y'. All. That's our show. Do we have a time?

[Erica Alexander]

I. I'm exhausted and like Sinclair, at the beginning of the episode, I still have to go to the bathroom.

[Kim Coles]

Yes. Oh, God. Thanks for hanging with me. And if you are loving the ride, keep it going. Subscribe and share the link.

[Erica Alexander]

YouTube, Spotify, Apple, anywhere you find, your.

[Kim Coles]

Podcast, anywhere you find.

[Erica Alexander]

I think we're. I always say we're still cute. Watch us. Watch us right here, like you are right now.

[Kim Coles]

Please. Watch the whole episode, all the way through. That helps us build the community and host a watch party. Right? Right. Yeah. Right.

[Erica Alexander]

Go on, tag us in your memes and tell your story. We would love to hear how you're feeling about this, how you felt about the show, and so much more.

[Kim Coles]

Thanks and big love, friends. We love you.

[Erica Alexander]

Bye for now.

[Kim Coles]

See you next week, same time, same flavor.

[Erica Alexander]

Booyah.

[Kim Coles]

Reliving Single is hosted by me, Erica Alexander and me, Kim Coles. Reliving Single is a production of Heartbeat in association with Color Farm Media, Executive.

[Erica Alexander]

Produced by Kevin Hart, Jeff Clanagan, Eric Eddings, Leslie Guam, Erica Alexander and Ben Alex.

[Kim Coles]

The show is produced by Kim Coles.

[Erica Alexander]

Amber Watson is our senior producer.

[Kim Coles]

Our associate producer is Kenny Jackson.

[Erica Alexander]

Our video editor is Nee Kirschman.

[Kim Coles]

Our sound engineers are Eric Hicks and Cedric Wilson.

[Erica Alexander]

Production supervision by Razak Boykin and Brett Calkins.

[Kim Coles]

Additional production support from Alex Atkins and Z. Taylor.

[Erica Alexander]

Special thanks to BK Augustine and Dr. E.J. johnson.

[Unknown]

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