Hosts with the Mosts

Summary

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RISK! Podcast — “Hosts with the Mosts” (December 30, 2025)

Episode Overview

In this dynamic and revealing episode of the RISK! podcast, host Kevin Allison introduces a special collection of stories, each told live on stage by different RISK! team members (except for Kevin himself). The episode shines a spotlight on the vibrant personalities who keep the RISK! machine running, from their comedic mishaps and awkward encounters to empowering moments of growth and personal boundaries. The main theme weaves around “hosting” — not just of events and shows, but of major (sometimes uncomfortable) life experiences, as shared by J.C. Cassis, David Crabb, and Cindy Freeman.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. Kevin Allison's Introduction & Context (03:23–05:15)

• Sets the tone for the episode: “Every story on this episode was told by someone on the Risk team other than me hosting a Risk live show.” (03:25, Kevin Allison)
• Notes upcoming Risk! events, with other team members frequently acting as hosts.

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2. Story #1 – J.C. Cassis: “Not That Casual” (05:16–12:04)

Background

• JC recounts her coming-of-age in NYC, detailing her unexpectedly sexless adolescence and college life, contrasted with her anticipation for wild post-grad city nights.

Key Story Beats

• New Year’s Eve 2007 at Don Hills club, attending the infamous Rated X party.
• A series of awkward and bizarre encounters on the dance floor:
  • Birdman Hipster Guy: Tall, skinny, striking hair, vacant stare; knocks her to the ground, ruining her dress.
  • Top Hat Guy: Initially “too formal” in his dance moves, JC encourages him to loosen up.
  • Things escalate when he misreads her cue and exposes himself on the dance floor:
    • “He has unzipped his fly and taken out his entire shaft of his penis. And his naked, flaccid dick is just hanging down, flopping around." (10:17, J.C. Cassis)
  • Top Hat Guy is bizarrely apologetic and seems genuinely naïve about social boundaries.

Humor & Reflection

• JC grapples with the absurd leap from “too formal” to “full frontal,” finding the humor in her misadventures.
• Ends by weighing the pros and cons of a sexless youth vs. these wild city stories:
  • “I think there’s pros and cons to both, but I do think that the latter makes for better stories.” (11:51, J.C. Cassis)

Notable Quotes

• “When I said you didn’t have to be so formal, I didn’t mean the next step is take your dick out and rub it on my butt.” (10:41, J.C. Cassis)
• “You said I could be less formal, and now I took my dick out, and now you’re mad. You know what I mean?” (Recap, 00:06 and 11:45, J.C. Cassis)

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3. Mid-Episode Banter, Listener Shout-Outs & Transitions (13:28–15:13)

• Kevin Allison highlights the importance of community among listeners, giving shout-outs to various groups (farmers, prisoners).
• Shares notes from listeners supporting the show and encourages support via Patreon/Paypal.

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4. Story #2 – David Crabb: “Kitchen Nightmares” (18:57–30:50)

Background

• David, newly relocated to Los Angeles, discusses the initial loneliness and struggle to find “his people.”
• Recounts forming a deep friendship with Delaney and the anxiety of meeting her new boyfriend, Trevor.

Key Story Beats

• A night out after a local devised storytelling show, searching for a late-night spot in Eagle Rock, CA.
• End up at a suspiciously empty Italian restaurant, Capri, unknowingly made famous (or infamous) by Gordon Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares.
• The evening becomes a cascading series of comic disasters:
  • Wine glasses spill and shatter—multiple times—over Trevor.
  • The waitstaff alternate between quirky, possibly impaired, and hopelessly apologetic.
  • The chef awkwardly delivers water—thumb in each glass, apologizing profusely.
  • Menu features a photo of the owners with Gordon Ramsay, triggering realization of where they are.
• Instead of ruining the budding friendship, the shared ordeal cements their bond; later, they laugh together watching the original episode at home.

Themes & Reflections

• LA’s unique social dynamics and geographic barriers to connection.
• Serendipity and disaster as community-building experiences.
  • “That beautiful restaurant might be gone, but the tastes and the sounds and the smells and the shards of glass and the good friendships remain.” (30:45, David Crabb)

Notable Quotes

• “You’re fucking in it, aren’t you?” (19:10, David Crabb, to new LA residents about the isolation)
• “As he approaches us...he had to grab the water by plunging his thumb into the water and then gripping, like a clip, the rim. And he knew it was awful. So he almost, with tears in his eyes, was like, ‘Here's your water. I'm so sorry.’” (26:45, David Crabb)
• “If you find me later, I’ll totally tell you the name of the restaurant.” (30:49, David Crabb; audience banter reveals it’s Capri)

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5. Story #3 – Cindy Freeman: “Fucking Tits” (33:00–43:15)

Background

• Cindy describes the bond with Marty, a financially struggling but supportive fellow actor, and how their relationship was grounded in mutual struggle and artistic hustle.

Key Story Beats

• Marty helps Cindy land an agent and they celebrate modestly, in keeping with their broke-but-resourceful norm.
• Cindy starts a new job, earning a windfall $200 tip from a hedge fund customer who encourages her to keep pursuing acting.
• Excited to celebrate, Cindy insists on treating Marty to dinner, but he resists—even becoming agitated and suspicious about her motives.
• Conversation turns sour; Marty accuses her of trading on her looks (“fucking tits”) and questions her integrity, projecting his frustrations onto Cindy.
  • “It’s the fact that you have fucking tits. And I don’t think you fucking understand how hard it is to be a guy like this. This doesn’t happen to guys.” (38:44, Marty via Cindy)
• Cindy chooses to end the relationship on the spot, recognizing red flags and reclaiming her energy. She celebrates instead with her roommate, sharing her windfall in a joyful toast.

Themes & Reflections

• Dignity, boundaries, and the importance of not internalizing others’ insecurities.
• Celebration of growth (“I don’t do this”—meaning she doesn’t tolerate emotional abuse anymore).
  • “That good mood that I was in—I still got it. I’m still in a good mood.” (43:17, Cindy Freeman)

Notable Quote

• “There had been points in my life when I would have walked into that apartment, and I didn’t.” (41:56, Cindy Freeman)
• “I could… remember all of that and leave. And I say to him, ‘Hey, this is over.’...I just don’t do this.” (41:44, Cindy Freeman)

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6. Musical Interlude – “Christmas is Bullshit” by J.C. Cassis (43:30–44:45)

• J.C. Cassis performs her satirical holiday anthem, expressing disdain for holiday obligations with hilarious candor:
  • “Christmas, Christmas is bullshit. I hate the music and pretending winter is fun.” (43:58, J.C. Cassis)

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Memorable Moments & Quotes (with Timestamps)

• “Sometimes when a man looks like a bird, it’s just very alluring.” (06:45, J.C. Cassis)
• “When I said you didn’t have to be so formal, I didn’t mean the next step is take your dick out and rub it on my butt…” (10:41, J.C. Cassis)
• “And in LA, dear friends would be like, ‘We’re having Pinot Grigio under our lemon tree. I don’t cross Rowena on a weeknight after seven. I’m so sorry.’” (21:30, David Crabb)
• “If you find me later, I’ll totally tell you the name of the restaurant.” (30:49, David Crabb)
• “It’s the fact that you have fucking tits. And I don’t think you fucking understand how hard it is to be a guy like this.” (38:44, Cindy Freeman as Marty)
• “I could… remember all of that and leave. And I say to him, ‘Hey, this is over.’” (41:44, Cindy Freeman)
• “Christmas, Christmas is bullshit. I hate the music and pretending winter is fun.” (43:58, J.C. Cassis)

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Segment Timestamps

| Segment | Timestamps | |:--------------------------------------------------------------|:--------------------:| | Introduction & Episode Theme | 03:23–05:15 | | Story 1 – J.C. Cassis: “Not That Casual” | 05:16–12:04 | | Listener Shout-Outs & Transitions | 13:28–15:53 | | Story 2 – David Crabb: “Kitchen Nightmares” | 18:57–30:50 | | Capri Restaurant Banter/Kitchen Nightmares Banter | 30:50–32:54 | | Story 3 – Cindy Freeman: “Fucking Tits” | 33:00–43:15 | | Song – “Christmas is Bullshit” and Outro | 43:30–44:45 |

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Conclusion

“Hosts with the Mosts” exemplifies RISK!’s signature blend of unapologetic honesty, riotous humor, and poignant self-realization. Each host’s narrative is at once deeply personal and universally resonant: JC’s dance floor misadventure, David’s LA restaurant fiasco, and Cindy’s boundary-setting breakup all resonate as stories of self-discovery, unexpected lessons, and the hard-won wisdom of adulthood. The episode closes with a musical wink, inviting listeners to cherish the wild unpredictability of life—and to always, as Kevin reminds us, take a risk.

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Transcript

[Kevin Allison]

Hey folks, this is Kevin. On this week's episode of Risk, you'll hear JC Cassis, you said I could.

[J.C. Cassis]

Be less formal and now I took my dick out and now you're mad. You know what I mean?

[Kevin Allison]

That and more. But first, I'm teaching another eight week long online storytelling workshop starting on January 14th at 8:30pm Eastern Time. We'll meet for two and a half hours each Wednesday evening at that time. Then I'll be doing another one, another Sunday morning workshop starting on February 1st at 10:00am Eastern Time. So email me at kevinrisk-show.com for more information.

[David Crabb]

We'll be right back.

[Cindy Freeman]

Come to DSW for the shoes, Stay for the fun. Because let's be honest, if shoe shopping isn't fun, are you even doing it right?

[David Crabb]

So go ahead, try something new. Try something different, good different.

[Cindy Freeman]

Try something that feels like you, you know, the real you. And then definitely brag about it later.

[David Crabb]

Because at dsw, you've got unlimited freedom to play. Find the shoes that get you at.

[Cindy Freeman]

Prices that get your budget at DSW stores [e-mail] Let us surprise you.

[David Crabb]

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[Cindy Freeman]

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[David Crabb]

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[Cindy Freeman]

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[J.C. Cassis]

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[Cindy Freeman]

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[J.C. Cassis]

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[Cindy Freeman]

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[Kevin Allison]

Now, here's the show.

[Cindy Freeman]

Hello, folks.

[Kevin Allison]

This is Risk, the show where people tell true stories and they never thought they'd dare to share. I'm Kevin Allison, and this is Move KA behind me now. And we're calling this week's episode Hosts with the Mouse. Every story on this episode was told by someone on the Risk team other than me hosting a Risk live show. You probably know I'm planning on hosting some Risk live shows in Bangkok in 2026, but did you know that other members of our staff often host Risk live shows? In a little bit, we're going to hear from David Crabb at a Risk live show in Los Angeles and Cindy Freeman hosting a Risk livestream show during the COVID lockdown. But first, A story from J.C. cassis. Now, when J.C. was in junior high, she was a fan of the State, my old sketch Comedy show on MTV. And around about 2010, she heard me on the podcast and on social media talking about how Risk seemed to be becoming successful enough to become a business. So I needed a business director. So you probably heard JC referred to many times on the podcast in that regard. But she's also a singer, songwriter, a cabaret performer, and now she's hosting the New York City shows of Risk at Caveat on the Lower east side. So here's JC at one of those nights back in September with a story we call not that Casual.

[J.C. Cassis]

The year is 2007. All right? It's New Year's Eve, and I'm standing outside a club that no longer exists in New York City. It was called Don Hills. Does anyone remember it? Yes. It is gone. And there was an amazing party there called rated X, the panty party. Does anybody remember that party? Yes. Okay, so you know, it was crazy. And so how did I get to this moment? I grew up in New York City. I went to an all girls private school from kindergarten through 12th grade. And this was during the 90s when not every 10 year old girl was out as queer and proud. Okay, so there was no sex and dating to be had in my high school, middle school experience. And then I went to college and I was going to a co ed school and I was thinking like, okay, this is my chance. There's gonna be dating, there's gonna be hookups. It's gonna be exciting. No, I went to the most sexually dead school ever. Unless you were a gay man who was willing to like, troll through Craigslist every single night looking for guys who wanted to hook up in the common room at 3 o' clock in the morning. But I was not a gay guy looking at Craigslist, so I didn't get any action there either. So I was very excited to come back to New York City as a young woman in her 20s and see what I could find for myself in the romance and love and dating and hookup world in New York City. So I'm standing outside Don Hills on New year's Eve of 2007, and I'm wearing a sexy, slinky little dress, and I'm feeling confident and sexy, and I'm excited for this party. And I go in and I think, you know, who am I going to meet tonight and what's going to happen? And I look across the dance floor, and there across the throbbing crowd, is someone who is one of my types. And at that time, one of my types was a tall, skinny, white hipster guy with amazing hair whose face looked like a bird. Anybody else? Anybody into birdie hipster guys? Sometimes when a man looks like a bird, it's just very alluring. And so I saw this birdman across the dance floor and I thought, I'm into that. I want a piece of that. And before I could even do anything about it, he zeroed in on me. And I was like, I'm not Birdman hipster guy's type. So this is very auspicious. What's happening? And he started barreling toward me through the crowd, and the crowd parted like a Red Sea. And he's barreling toward me, and I'm like, what the hell is happening that a birdman hipster guy actually likes me? He's coming toward me. I'm getting all excited, but then I look at his face and he looks extremely high or drunk, just very fucked up, very, like, vacant stare. And I was like, oh, maybe I don't want any of this. And before I can do anything, he has barreled into me and knocked me to the ground. And he's, like, on top of me. And I was like, yeah, this is not the kind of approach that I like. And so I had kind of like, a clueless moment. I was like, ugh. As if. And I pushed him off of me. But he had, like, smushed my, like, lovely little party dress into this, like, sticky floor covered in, like, dried drinks, like, spilled drinks and, like, cigarette butts and shoe dirt. And I was like, ugh, this is not a good start to my night. But I pushed him off and I got up and I dusted myself off and I said, okay, who else is here. And I look across, I'm like, yeah, I'm still ready, I'm still ready to go. So I look across the other direction of the dance floor and across the crowd on a stage. I see that there are these two very hot gentlemen who seem to be friends out on the prowl. So I think, ok, great, I'll go over that way. And I have two chances. And so I introduced myself to these guys and I stood between them and we were all dancing in a little sandwich of dancers and stuff. And they were another kind of a type, which is a very, very handsome black gentleman. So the guy that I was facing first because one was in front of me, one was behind me. The guy that I was facing, he had like a beautiful smile and beautiful eyes and this lovely little button nose. He had very radiant skin. And he was wearing like a black button down shirt that was very well tailored to his body and very nicely tailored black pants. And you could see that he didn't skip chest day or ab day or leg day or butt day or anything. He was working on all of it and looked great. And he was also wearing a big black top hat. So kind of quirky but fun. And then things got a little weird because as he started to dance with me, the first thing he did, even.

[Cindy Freeman]

Though he was probably in his like.

[J.C. Cassis]

Mid-20S, late 20s, he put his arms out like Frankenstein and put his hands on my shoulders and started dancing. Like he was like a middle school boy who had never touched a girl before and like didn't know what to do. And he wasn't joking around. So I was like, what on earth is going on right now? So I said to him, because I grew up in New York City, so like, you know, I'd been out dancing many times as a young woman before then and like guys were not too formal and too scared like that, like they would grind up on you, they would grab your hand and pull you and make you dance with them. And all this stuff that I'm glad doesn't happen anymore, but I like that nobody even looks at each other anymore on New York City dance floor. It's very sad. So this guy was dancing with me like a middle schooler and I couldn't figure out what was going on. So I just said to him, like, oh, you know, I appreciate that you're not being like too aggressive, but you don't have to be quite so formal. You can relax a little bit. Like it's New Year's Eve, like we can grind, it's fine. You can do whatever. Like, you can relax. And he was like, oh, okay, okay. Like, nobody had ever told him that before. And I was like, okay. So then I turn around and I start dancing with a friend. And so I'm facing his friend, and Top Hat guy is behind me. And then all of a sudden, I feel top Hat guy come up behind me and start grinding on me. And I was like, okay, great. He's getting into it. We're like. We're getting somewhere cool. I'm grinding with two guys at the same time. Like, sweet, cool. And then I feel something weird on my butt.

[David Crabb]

Yeah.

[J.C. Cassis]

And I'm like, what is that? Let me just turn around and see what's going on. So I turn around and I scan Top Hat Guy. He's still looking very dapper. He's got the hat, he's got the shirt, he's got the pants. But he has unzipped his fly and taken out his entire shaft of his penis. And his naked, flaccid dick is just hanging down, flopping around. And that's what was rubbing on my butt. And so I was just like, oh.

[Cindy Freeman]

Oh, God.

[J.C. Cassis]

Oh, okay. When I said you didn't have to be so formal, I didn't mean the next step is take your dick out and rub it on my butt. But I guess I can see how you made that mistake. And then what was really funny was, you know, in New York City, sometimes when you are dealing with a guy and then you have to kind of, like, pump the brakes on them, sometimes they'll get kind of aggressive and annoyed. So I would have expected him to be, like, you said I could be less formal. And now I took my dick out, and now you're mad. You know what I mean? But instead, it was still very weird and confusing because instead of doing that, he was like, oh, oh, I'm sorry. And he was, like, very sincere, as if he had never. It had never occurred to him that, like, maybe you shouldn't take your dick out and rub it on somebody as the next thing step. So he literally was just like, I'm sorry. And then he just started, like, clumsily, like, stuffing his dick back into his pants, and then, like, zipped up his fly. And then he was like, okay, we're back on track, you know? And I was just like, this is a very weird night, but many, many crazy things happened that night. And I just have to, like, kind of reflect on what it was like to go from, like, a sexless school experience, a sexless college experience, to then getting like a dick rubbed on me on a dance floor in New York City. And I think there's pros and cons to both, but I do think that the latter makes for better stories. So thank you.

[David Crabb]

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[J.C. Cassis]

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[David Crabb]

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[J.C. Cassis]

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[David Crabb]

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[J.C. Cassis]

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[David Crabb]

Learn [e-mail] what's up?

[Kevin Allison]

It's Draymond Green. I'm back for my 14th NBA season and my podcast the Draymond Green show is back too. This season I'm breaking down games, reacting to the biggest NBA stories and sitting down with teammates, rivals and culture shapers. And trust me, I'm not holding back on the court or on the mic. Two new episodes every week. New segments, big conversations, real basketball talk for the real hoop heads. Listen to and follow the Draymond Green show wherever you get your podcast. We're back. We're better. Let's get it.

[David Crabb]

We're back.

[Kevin Allison]

This is Risk. This is Dum Dum behind me now. And we just heard from the greatest Dum Dum of them all, J.C. you know we have played Jaycee's song Christmas is Bullshit on the show before and since tis the season. How about we revisit it at the end of this episode? Her latest single Ice Dick and her latest ep, four on the Floor are also available on all music streaming services. You can find her on Instagram C Cassis and you can find her on TikTok at jccasses. No doubt about it folks. One of our Patreon patrons, Teresa, sent us this note with her contribution a few years back to help keep Risk running. She said. JC convinced me that you can get through this hard time. Good idea to have had her on the air. Thank you so much Teresa. Now that was a few years ago when we had JC come on the podcast to explain our financial situation then. But so much has changed since then and our financial situation is as scary now at least as it was then that I think sometime in 2026 I should have JC come back on the podcast to fill you all in on the behind the scenes and the changing landscape we're in now. And now another Patreon patron named Eric wrote to us. Godspeed y'.

[David Crabb]

All.

[Kevin Allison]

Long time listener and farm owner definitely understand the peaks and valleys of income flow. I'll tell you, I love how popular we are with far. Thank you so much, Eric. You know, there's something so sweet about knowing that so many people doing such meaningful and essential work are listening to the show while they're doing it and to the prisoners. We hear from incarcerated people all the time about how much the show means to them from their being able to access it in prison. So big shout outs to Chuko and Eddie, Byron, Chance, Pete, anyone. I might be forgetting all the inmates that listen to the show. We hope you're all doing as well as you can be this holiday season. It means so much to us to hear how much the show means means to you all. But I got a little bit off topic there. So if you, dear listener, would like to become a patron of ours and help keep this show running, there are so many perks to [e-mail] risk and if you want to make a one time donation, that's at PayPal me riskshow. Next we're going to hear stories from David Crab, our longtime producer of the Risk live shows in la, and then Cindy Freeman, our casting director and head of our school, the Story Studios Corporate workshops division. Now, Cindy's story will have a different feel to it in terms of the audio quality because it was recorded during the COVID lockdown when Risk was doing show shows via live stream where the host and the storytellers were broadcasting from their own homes. And you can actually watch those video recordings of those live streams if you're a member of ours at Patreon. Oh my gosh, it is such a time capsule. It's such a fascinating, amazing time that we went through there in that particular situation. My father had just passed away and I shared about that on the episode of Risk called Bereavement. And while I was home for the funeral and recording that sort of eulogy into the voice memo app on my phone, Cindy was hosting our livestream show when she shared the story that you're gonna hear in a little bit. But let's start with David. He told this story after Theresa Miller told the story that was featured on the episode of Risk called Some Kind of Love. Her story partly concerned how challenging it can be to find your community and your bearings in a city that you just moved to a subject you've heard me talking about recently in Patreon, Check ins and my social media videos. So here's David Crabb now. But the story we call Kitchen Nightmares.

[David Crabb]

Theresa Miller. That was so great. I love that story because it made me think so much about, like, that very real time when you're new to LA that it's sort of like. It's kind of like, hard to find a community. How many of y' all have. Has anyone here been in LA under three years? Oh, a lot of you. Has anyone been here under one year? Yeah. You're fucking in it, aren't you? No, I'm kidding. It's great. So there's a thing. When I moved to LA at the beginning of 2006, and it was like, 2016 was just a crazy year to move here. When I moved here, I had that kind of honeymoon period that LA gives you. I'd lived in New York for, like, 16 years, and it was beautiful. Do you know what I mean? Like, endless, endless beautiful sunsets. I could see the horizon line wherever I went. I was behind the wheel of a car, which made me feel like I escaped from an institution instead of being underground in, like, a shame stinkhole tube. And I remember one of my favorite memories of being in la the first time, as I was driving down Sunset and the windows were down, and my little dog Charlie was curled up in a ball. He's a Chihuahua, Jack Russell. So the fact that he's sleeping, going 40 miles an hour, like, that's how relaxed LA made him. Do you know what I mean? And we're driving down Sunset, and on the radio, that song, Boys of Summer by Don Henley comes on. Do you remember that song? Yeah. Never look back, you could. And, like, the wind was in my hair and I burst into tears, but, like, the kind of tears. Have y' all seen Texas Chainsaw Massacre? There's. There's a part in the end where the final girl finally gets into the bed of the truck and, like, you know, Leatherface is, like, in the road with the chainsaw, and she's just covered in the blood of her friends going. That's how I felt. Like, I felt like I had a real moment of, like, I got out of that place. Now, I love New York, and I don't mean to do this in New York, but I was like, it was time to go. Do you know what I mean? Now, this thing, though, happened, though, when you're in New York where and y' all probably all experienced this, if you've moved here from other places, is there's a beautiful time, and then all of a sudden you start to get, like, the loneliness of it. Like, the difference of it As a very spread out place in which you have to get everywhere by car, right? In New York, you know, I could tell people like, hey, you're gonna come to my show? And they could be like, yes, I'm sharing a railroad apartment with two polyamorous clowns and the heater's broken. And I will take two trains and a bus to see you tell a five minute story at a Pitbull fundraiser in Red Hook. I'm gonna be there, David. I'm gonna see you. And in la, I was doing things. And like, dear friends of mine would be like, oh, break legs tonight, but we're having Pinot Grigio under our lemon tree. And I don't cross Rowena on a weeknight after seven. I'm so sorry, do you know what I mean? And it was weird to be critical of it, but also I was the same way with the east side geography, do you know what I mean? I started to get it right, but it was really lonely. And then 2016 happened, and then the election happened and all that fucking madness and the way the world started to change. And the beginning of 2017 was a bit weird and I felt isolated. And then I met this wonderful friend. Her name's Delaney. She felt like when you meet a person, that's your person and it almost feels like a sibling thing. I'm an only child. And I was like, you're my fucking sister, you get me? And it was just like a really great friendship. And I was so happy to have her. And then about a year after we know each other one day she's like, I started dating someone and I was like, oh, well, who is he? And have you ever had that thing where you have a really, really dear friend and they're single for a while and you get used to them a certain way and it's not that you're unhappy. Like, when she told me she had a boyfriend, I was so happy for her. But then the next thought was, well, there's a little bit of like, well, I like him. But then the big thought, will he like me? Do you know what I mean? Like, am I gonna be on the outs? Like, are they gonna approve? I get so hung up when my friends start dating a new person. So Delaney's like my main person in the city and I'm sort of thinking, like, what's gonna fucking happen? And I meet this guy and I meet him a few times and he's perfectly lovely, he's really nice. And one night they're gonna. They say, why don't we come out to Eagle Rock. I teach college out at Occidental, and I teach this class. It's devised storytelling. So it's like students who tell stories, but then they, like, put on, like, costumes and tell those stories in, like, men's room and weird spaces. And the audience moves around. Like, it's very, you know, like, I was like, I hope he likes my weird show. Do you know what I mean? And him and her came and they saw the show and they loved it. And they were in Eagle Rock, and they were like, you know, we gotta get home, but we should hang out. And I, like, was like, oh, I'd love to get to know Trevor better. Let's go to. And then I started to look around, like, Eagle Rock. I love Eagle Rock. It's like a Tuesday night at 10pm Forget it. Just stay at home. There's nothing. Nothing. And I started looking. And I was looking on the news. I was like, I found a restaurant. I was like, let's call this restaurant. So we called them in the car, right? Cause I just wanted a drink. Mama wanted a drink. Do you know what I mean? Like a cocktail. And they said, yeah, we're open till 11:30. It was a guy with this sort of, like, New York accent, which I thought was like, oh, that's weird. And he said, we're open till 11:30. You know, come on by. But we closed at 11:30. It was 10:55. So I was like, cool, y'. All. I called him. We're gonna park over there. Just go. The four of us will have, like, a quick Italian bite, a slice of pizza and some drinks. We get to the restaurant and we go inside. Now, I should have known, because when we walk inside, it was a little, like, charming, junky. Like, it did have a little bit. Like, you felt like you could have, like, run your finger on the top of the lampshade and been like, mommy dearest about that shit. Do you know what I mean? I don't hate you. I hate the dirt. Like, it was a little. But the weird thing was, as we were walking in, there was no one else in the restaurant except the kitchen staff. You could see and a guy over here. And then a guy came out of the bathroom and he was walking. He's like, have a good night. Thanks. And then the owner of the restaurant looked at him and said, sir, your baby in a chair at a table was a baby carrier with a living, breathing, preemie looking baby. And he was just like, pay the bill. So he was like, oh, man. Like, should have had a V8 over my child, you know? And so, not that that's indicative of the restaurant, but it was like a weird way to start it. Do you know what I mean? Like, we could have left. I was like, that's weird. But I was like, no, let's stay. So we sat at a table, we're sitting, I'm getting to talk to Trevor, and Delaney's talking to my husband Jack. We're just having a great time when this guy comes over and he is like, the. Wait. And he comes over. He's sort of like a short, squat guy. He's got sort of squinty eyes. Hello, how are you doing? Like, totally from Queens or something, right? And as he's talking to us, like, I'm trying to take him in, and I realize the back of the restaurant is also him. And I realize that he has, like a twin who is, like, counting the money, looking sour at us, while, like, the happy one is outward facing in the restaurant. You know what I mean? Like, I get their fucking twin vibe, like, what they're doing. And he's like, well, what can we get for you? And we're like, what kind of red wine do you have? And he says, red, okay, no, full bar. I'm going to make it work. So he goes back, we're talking, and a few minutes later, he comes up to the table and he's holding a tray of four glasses of wine. And he literally is walking like this. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm like, is this Cirque du Soleil? Is this like, Commedia dell'? Arte? What are you doing right now? He gets up to the table and all four glasses of wine slide and shatter on the table and the floor. And I see Trevor sitting furthest outside. It gets on his pants and. And I'm like, oh, God, I'm so sorry. And then Trevor, I just hear him. Xander's breath. Oh, I think I'm going to be sick. And I'm like, oh, God, this is the worst. This is all going so wrong. The guy is dabbing at him with a napkin. Like, just give me the napkins. I don't want you, like, touching my chest area. I'm just like, this is so terrible. So then he goes away. And then a waitress comes up. She comes up to us and she's like, she talks very quiet. She's touching sort of her hips. She has a cap on, and she's sort of touching the sides of her face. Like she's having, like this kind of mdna. Very Sort of like erotic physiological experience. I don't know what is happening for her, but she's telling us about lasagna, and there's delicious breadsticks. And I'm like, what the fuck is happening in this restaurant? And we're all just staring at her. We're like, look, we just need the wine replaced, and we'd love some water for now. So she goes away. And Trevor, I can see him swallow the way that someone like, the Phil's ill swallowing. I just think, nothing. It's not working. This whole. It's going to shit. And then he comes up, he gives us some wine, and as he's gonna grab the third glass of wine, it almost is like his hand just goes sideways. And another glass of red wine shatters on the table by Trevor. And I'm like, is this what is happening? And as this is happening, I open the menu thinking, this is a nightmare. And on the back is the twins with Gordon Ramsay. And we all realize that we are in a restaurant Gordon Ramsay saved. We are in a kitchen nightmare salvaged restaurant. And I'm like, okay, this is gonna be a lot. And then as we're taking that in, there's like, a cook the whole time who's like, sort of a salty old guy with, like, a mullet. And he's staring at us through the window just with steam, like, rising into his face. Do you know what I mean? Kind of watching. And, like, if you're the one making my food, I don't want to see you. It just seems like there's weirdness. You're putting in the food, like a, like, water for chocolate, like, water for acid kind of way is what I feel like it is. So at a certain point, finally, like, we just need waters. And I guess, like, our. Our tweedledee waiter was like, I'm not going back to that table. And the ecstasy woman was probably just, like, feeling herself up in the bathroom. She didn't come back. So the guy who I've been looking at through the window, the salty cook, he comes and he's holding a tray of four waters. And he's looking at us terrified, like he's not the front facing part of the restaurant clearly, like he has been roped into just having to bring water to someone. And as he approaches us, he gets to the table and he looks at us, and I guess he had some kind of rotation issue with his wrist. He couldn't turn it enough to grab the water, so he had to grab the water by plunging his thumb into the water and then gripping, like a clip, the rim of the glass. And he knew it was awful. So he just almost, with tears in his eyes one moment, was like, here's your water. I'm so sorry. Here is your water. I'm so sorry. Here is your water. I'm very sorry about, like, just apologizing. And at one point, he walks away. And Trevor looks at his water and he's like, there is a piece of parsley in my water. We eat our food. Well, Trevor doesn't eat anything. And it's like at 11:30 when they close and we sign the check and we're getting up and we're leaving. There's, like, wine stains. It's been terrible. And as we leave this waiter, after all this, he didn't take anything off the bill. He looks at us and he says, thanks for coming. And remember, next time, earlier is better. I know. And we left the restaurant. And I thought I just ruined. I mean, whatever I could have done for that new friendship is fucked. Do you know what I mean? Like, that's not happening. And then Trevor sent us this funny text. He found a funny link. And a week later, he came over to our house. They brought some wine, him and Delaney. And the four of us in our living room petting our dog, having the nicest time, watched the Gordon Ramsay episode of Kitchen Nightmares about these twin brothers and their literal terrifying dungeon of a restaurant. And we just reveled in it. We reveled in one of them sobbing over a thing of rotten yams. We reveled over another one screaming about T shirts if we sold T shirts. It was just so. And the whole time we're watching it, we're laughing. And my husband is now Trevor, being like, I'm going to be sick. I ate there. I'm going to be sick. You know, I almost wanted to name the restaurant, but I thought, maybe enough has happened to these guys. And just to prove that maybe enough has, a friend of mine sent me a link two days ago that they're selling their restaurant. Their restaurant is sold. It wasn't long for this world. That beautiful restaurant might be gone, but the tastes and the sounds and the smells and the shards of glass and the good friendships remain. Thank you. Whoa. Oh, God. Find me after. I don't want it archived in audio, but if you find me later, I'll totally tell you the name of the restaurant.

[Kevin Allison]

Capri.

[David Crabb]

Capri. Capri.

[Kevin Allison]

Capri. Capri.

[David Crabb]

Capri.

[Cindy Freeman]

Capri.

[Kevin Allison]

Nestled in the middle of the up.

[David Crabb]

And coming neighborhood of Eagle Rock, California, is Capri Capri. Classic Italian.

[Cindy Freeman]

No. I'm Jeff. You're Jim. I'm Jim. And we're the owners of the Capri Italian restaurant.

[Kevin Allison]

Are you ready to see the new Capri?

[David Crabb]

Yes.

[Kevin Allison]

One, two, three. Capri.

[Cindy Freeman]

Yes.

[Kevin Allison]

Good.

[J.C. Cassis]

Yes.

[David Crabb]

Hi there.

[Cindy Freeman]

How are you?

[David Crabb]

Pretty good. I'm Jeff.

[Kevin Allison]

Good to see you.

[Cindy Freeman]

Good to see you.

[Kevin Allison]

Likewise.

[David Crabb]

What a joke. Oh, you need to commit.

[Kevin Allison]

Is that how I showed you to plate a spaghetti meatball? No, it looks like someone on my plate.

[David Crabb]

No, no. Stop panicking and focus, you big wet poo pants.

[Cindy Freeman]

Thank you, Jim.

[David Crabb]

What's wrong, Jim? I feel bad. Go take a break. Jim, I can't.

[Cindy Freeman]

Thank you.

[David Crabb]

Why do you have to behave like this?

[Cindy Freeman]

Because I'm a failure.

[David Crabb]

What a spoiled rat. I'm right. We're failures. Yay. I'm just asking you to grow up a little bit.

[Kevin Allison]

Yeah. It's time.

[David Crabb]

Time to let go of the past.

[Kevin Allison]

And to embrace the future.

[David Crabb]

I want to know what's holding you back. I don't work out. Come on.

[Kevin Allison]

What pissed you off the most? What is it?

[David Crabb]

Myself.

[Kevin Allison]

Why?

[David Crabb]

Huh? I can't remember. What are you afraid of? Tell me.

[Kevin Allison]

Screw it up.

[David Crabb]

Damn it. Just screwed up. Burn it all my life.

[Kevin Allison]

I'm a failure.

[David Crabb]

You're not a failure.

[J.C. Cassis]

Listen.

[Kevin Allison]

You are not.

[David Crabb]

We all make mistakes in life. Embrace change. Yeah.

[Kevin Allison]

It's time.

[David Crabb]

I'm ready to move on, to make a success out of this. I know. I'm gonna look towards the future successes that are coming. Yay. Wow. Got it.

[Kevin Allison]

Okay. How you feeling?

[David Crabb]

Good.

[J.C. Cassis]

Right?

[David Crabb]

Are you ready? Ready? Are you ready? Yes. Yeah. One, two, three, change. Oh, wow. You're happy?

[Kevin Allison]

Yeah.

[David Crabb]

Yeah, it's great. Nice.

[Cindy Freeman]

Oh, my God.

[David Crabb]

Wow. What's the matter? It's just. Just amazing. It really is. We're moving on. The Capri is gonna work. Good luck.

[J.C. Cassis]

Good luck.

[David Crabb]

Good luck.

[Cindy Freeman]

Good luck.

[David Crabb]

Good luck. That beautiful restaurant. It's gone.

[Cindy Freeman]

The thing that Marty and I mostly had in common was the fact that we were actors who were broke. Like, broke. Like, I was buying my groceries on credit cards broke because I had just gotten fired from a bar job and was having a hard time finding a replacement. I had met him at one of my acting teachers Christmas parties, and he was broke because he was a working actor. He only acted, but he only got gigs, like, once or twice a year. But he told me, you know, I have a great agent. I mean, sent out all the time. And I was like, oh, if only I had an agent. And he was like, I will introduce you to my agent. I Will help you. You should be focusing on your career. Screw this bar business. And so he coached me and he introduced me and he gave me tips. Like, you know these guys, they're going to love you. They love flirting with the pretty girls. I'm pretty. I was excited he said that. Of course they set me up with some female agents. She didn't flirt. Oh well. But they signed me and then we celebrated. So Marty and I celebrated in a way that once we started dating, which was pretty soon after meeting became how we dated, neither of us had money. We would meet up at his tiny little hovel on the Lower east side. And he was a part time photographer with sort of a second artistic business that he made very little money at. But he was kind of a hippie with this big mop of curly brown hair. And he would sort of go up and down his street and offer deals to the local businesses. I will take photos for your social media in exchange for. So he got free coffee. Everywhere he went. He got bottles of wine in exchange. So everything was barter system. So we would hang out at his place, order at the cheapest place, which was Barquette, where we get the best, you know, baba ganoush and falafel in that area, and then go back and drink free wine. And then I got myself a job. And he was super excited for me. In fact, that's the thing I liked the most about him. Like, no matter what was going on, he was on my frigging side. If I had a bad interview, those guys, if I had a bad audition, fuck those guys. If somebody was mean to me, you know, on the subway, fucking, he was always on my side. So when I got this job, he was like, good for you. Yeah, you'd see, you're. You're making it. This is great. So on my first week at this place, it was called Buster's Garage. It was a, you know, burger kind of join Wings and in wants these guys in suits and they sit up at the, you know, two tables and they're like, you know, shots, we need shots. I'm pouring shots. More shots, more shots, more shots. And then the leader of the pack gets up in his early 40s, handsome guy, and he's like, you know, I couldn't do it without you guys. And I, I have to say to him, you guys are so happy. I gotta ask you, what's going on? He's like, oh, we are a hedge fund and today we made record. We made millions. Like, like, I, I'm, I'm embarrassed. How much money we made today. And I'm like, that's. And he's like, yeah. And he's like, you an actor? I was like, yeah, I am. And he's like, yeah, I used to be an actor. And I just. I just couldn't take it. I needed. I needed to make money. But, like, good for you. And when he tipped me, he's like, two crisp 100 bills. He goes, that's for you. Pursue your career. Don't be like me. Don't quit. I'm like, I can't take that. He goes, take it. And I am so excited because I'm walking between this and the rest of me, like, the $350. And I don't even text him. I call Marty. I'm like, marty, this is what's happening. I am taking you out to dinner. I'm taking you to a real restaurant, like a grownup, where we're going to be waited on, where we're going to buy alcohol that we pay for and we tip somebody. That's the plan. And he's like, we'll talk about it when you get here. And I'm like, no, I want to take you out. I want to thank you. I've never got to properly thank you. And he said, we'll talk about it when you get here. So I'm taking the subway over, and I'm thinking, you know, he doesn't want me, you know, squander my money. We'll make a deal. And when I get there, I say to him, like, this is what we're going to do. We're going to find the cheapest restaurant that we can be waited on, and we'll put a limit on it. No more than 45, including taxing tip. And he's like, no, no, you are not spending your money this way. And I'm like, but I really want to. And he's like, no. And I'm like, well, then what do you want to do? He goes, well, go to Barat, and I have a bottle of wine. So we're walking to Barakat, and I'm disappointed because I really wanted to do something nice. And he starts saying this thing about, like, you know, this is because you're a girl, that this happened to you. And I'm like, what does that mean? He goes, nobody tips a guy $200. Like, just gives it to him. And I'm like, well, no, this guy, he wanted to support me because I was. No, no, no, no. He wanted to sleep with you. And I'm like, well, he didn't ask for my number, so I'm actually going to take it at face value. And he's like, yeah, you know, you know. And I'm curious like, what did you do to get that money? I'm like, what do you mean what did you do? He's like, were you flirting with him? And it's like, cause guys can't just like flirt and make money. And I'm like, let's change the subject. So he gets a barette. And I'm still in a good mood cuz I've got money that I'm not going to have to buy gross bees on credit cards, on big smiles. I know the guys all the time. I'm like, hey. And they're like, hey, it's you, how you doing? You look beautiful, what do you want? I know what you want. They shout my order to me because they know what I always order. And then he's like, I'm giving you extra falafel, cuz you're awesome. And I'm like, great. And Marty just says, yeah, I'm gonna meet you outside. So Marty disappears. And the guys behind the counter, they're all smiles. I tip them extra big because I finally can. I'm so excited. But Marnie's outside and I know something's troubling him. I'm not looking forward to what that might be, but I get out there and I'm like, are you okay? And he's like, fucking tits. It's the fact that you have fucking tits. And I don't think you fucking understand how hard it is to be a guy like this. This doesn't happen to guys. Well, I've been going to this place, nobody ever gives me extra falafel. It's that you have fucking tits. And I'm like, you need to keep your voice down. And so now he's whispering, fucking tits. And I'm like, you know, can we, can we change the conversation? Like can we just have our dinner? And as we're walking, he's not, he's like, you know, I'm not changing it because you need to understand how this feels. It's not easy being a guy and you just don't fucking get it. And then he is screaming at me about like, you know, and what did you do? Like, how much flirting did you have to do with these guys to get your $200? And by the time we get to his door, I am sitting there still carrying the food because he didn't offer this, like, I'm In a good mood, and I have a choice. He has his keys out, he's opening the door, and I can follow him and continue this argument all night long, or I can remember that A, and I'm over 40. B, I've been in abusive relationships. I've dated someone for four years. I ended up spending hundreds of dollars of therapy to not only get out of that relationship, but to understand how I got in that relationship in the first place. I could just remember all of that and lead. And I say to him, hey, this is over. And he's like, what? And I said, I'm going to take my food. You can have your food. And I'm going to go home. And he's like, oh, so you don't want to have this conversation, so you're just going to leave? And I'm like, no, no, no, this is over. And he said, you're dumping me? And I said, I don't do this. I just don't do this. I came here in a great mood. I came here wanting to do something nice for you. And it's not that. Can't accept it. It's like, you gotta think about how you talk to women. And he's like, you're fucking dumping me. And I'm like, do you want your food? He goes, I don't want my fucking food. And so I take all the food, and he walks in, and I just sort of walk away. And this sense of lightness sort of rips up my spine out the top of my head. Like, there had been points in my life and I would have walked into that apartment, and I didn't. And I get on the subway and I'm like, there must have been signs. And I think, well, yeah, there was the. The agency will treat you better because you're a woman. And there was the fact that he hated everybody who was against me. Like, he hated them. And, like, why didn't I realize at some point that that rage would at some point turn against me? But I get off the subway, and I still have this pile of money, and I still want to do something nice for someone and pay it forward, you know? And I remember I have a roommate. My roommate's pretty call. And I call him. I say, hey, Mark. And he's like, hey. I said, you home? He's like, yeah, you need something? I'm like, I am right by a liquor store, and I know you like Makersmart, so this is what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna buy you a full bottle, the largest one I can find in Maker's Mark. And then we're gonna sit down and we're gonna have a drink and toast the fact that I have a new job where I got a $200 tip. And he went, that's amazing. And I was like, yeah. And he goes, you don't have to. I said, I'm doing it. He goes, you're the best roommate ever. So I get him a $40 bottle of Maker's Mark and we sit down and we drink on the front steps of our apartment building, eat cold falafel, and celebrate the fact that I have a new job that maybe is going to make ends meet. That I caught a $200 tip today and mostly, at least for me, that this good mood that I was in, I still got it. But I'm still in a good mood. Thank you.

[J.C. Cassis]

Well, Christmas is here it sends shivers up my spine Cause this part of the year is my least favorite time I don't stuff stockings I don't buy dead trees I only like shopping if the shopping is for me the food makes me fatter Christmas cookies taste like wood Ugly sweaters don't flatter and I prefer to look good the weather is nasty, the crowds are insane don't be mad at me but I just gotta say Christmas, Christmas is bullshit I hate the music and pretending winter is fun it's the worst season Everybody knows it Christmas, Christmas is I don't wanna do it. Let me skip this one so I can have fun.

[Kevin Allison]

This is risk. This is J.C. cass's behind me. Now you can look for Christmas is on all streaming platforms. There's also a PG rated version, safe for playing around the kids, I guess. And we just heard from Cindy Freeman. Cindy is not just a brilliant casting director for Risk who goes through all of your story pitches and not just the leader of so many incredible corporate storytelling workshops for the Story Studio over the years, but she also runs the beloved hotsy Tatzi burlesque show at the legendary Slipper Room. It's New York City's longest running nerd lesk show. And you can find Cindy on Instagram at Cindy Freem. And before that was a story from David Crabb, who does so much hilarious work with the Groundlings in la. And you can see a lot of that hilarity on his Instagram at the David Crab. Now, speaking of Cindy going through your pitches, something occurred to me a few episodes back when Rachel Ann Warren told the story on the episode called not in Hiding Anymore about losing her hair. Two people in my online workshop that week also shared stories on subjects I'd never heard people share about on the show or in our workshops before. So that was like three stories I heard in one week where I thought, wow. The specifics of this particular story are something I haven't heard in our workshops or on the show before. So I'm inviting those two folks from my workshop to share their stories here next year on the podcast. But let me put it to you too. Do you have a story about something you haven't quite heard someone share about on Risk yet? Maybe you've heard someone share about this subject matter more broadly in some way, but the specifics of your story make it different somehow. Pitch it to us at risk-show.com submissions and again, I'm teaching another eight week long online storytelling workshop starting on January 14th at 8:30pm Eastern. We will meet for two and a half hours each Wednesday evening at that time. Then I'll be doing another Sunday morning workshop starting on February 1st at 10am Eastern. We have people fill out a survey after they take the workshop and I guess Google just added an AI summary thing to their survey forms. So here is what AI said that the participants in the workshop have been saying so far about it in 2025. They say it's a supportive and safe environment with camaraderie, warmth and genuine support and without pressure to share. The combination of pre recorded video lessons and instructional videos which allowed for self paced learning and weekly in class workshopping sessions provided ample time for questions and feedback and was highly effective. Kevin's insightful feedback, his deep knowledge of storytelling, gentle teaching approach, generosity with time and energy, and ability to break down stories, including those in the videos, were greatly appreciated and participants enjoyed the freedom to share stories of various lengths or tones at any stage of their evolution. So what are you waiting for? Listen to how excited AI is about the workshop. Email me at [e-mail] for more info. Now next week we will be debuting Holiday Blues, three gorgeous new stories about the holidays but with a sad side to them. But that's next week and folks, today's the day. Take a risk.

[J.C. Cassis]

Nobody wants no food cake. Throw that shit out. Christmas is bo. We don't have to do it. We can skip this one. We can have fun. This time is done.

[David Crabb]

Here we have the Limu Emu in its natural habitat helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual.

[Kevin Allison]

Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally Doug.

[David Crabb]

Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us Us? Cut the camera they see us. Only pay for what you need@liberty mutual.com Liberty Liberty Liberty Liberty Savings Fairy underwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Co. Affiliates excludes.

[Cindy Freeman]

Massachusetts Tired of holiday spending? Try TikToks slash and free Pick products, share your link and slash the price down to zero. Free items free shipping open TikTok, search, slash free and start slashing today.