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A
What's poppin, Congregation? We are back for another installment of Confessions on Stitcher Premium. And today I'm back with my host, as always. Oh, who am I? I'm Lacey Mosley, guys, AKA Scam Goddess. And my co host is here with me.
B
And I'm Priscilla Davies.
A
Way better at intros than I am for Solace. I was like, oh, right, I have a name. I should say. Today we're gonna be talking about restaurant scams.
B
Ooh, I love a good restaurant scam.
A
I do, too. So we had a few listeners write in about restaurant scams, and then there was one that's floating around in the zeitgeist. So we're just gonna be talking about that today. Okay, Priscilla, what's a good name for this guy, this first one? Cause they did not give us a name, which I love. Cause they don't even wanna run the risk of us using their government.
B
Nobody wants to be exposed. I'm gonna go with Bruce. Bruce.
A
All right. Bruce Almighty.
B
I was thinking Bruce. Bruce. But that's fine.
A
Both are good. One is better.
B
One is better. And we'll leave that up to the viewer to figure out which one.
A
Right? So Bruce says, hello. I worked in an Italian restaurant for too many years during high school. And they played in all caps, the long con. I have bullet pointed these for easy reading and referencing, Bruce says with a smiley face. So the first thing they did was the liquor scam. Every liquor was moved down one shelf, meaning if you ordered Roberto Cavalli, you really got Grey Goose. If you ordered Grey Goose, you got Svetka. And if you ordered Svetka, you got Smirnoff. If you order Smirnoff, all caps, I don't know what the fuck you got. We played bottle swap in the back with funnels at the end of the night. Sure, there's a markup on liquor, but damn. So,
B
wow.
A
So here's how this works, is like, this wouldn't work on me because I know the difference between liquors when I taste them. Like, if I ordered Grey Goose and you gave me Svedka, I would know. But a lot of people don't know.
B
No, a lot of people don't know. Especially, you know, if you're a vodka drinker. Cause vodka is like, its claim to fame is that it's supposed. When it's really done well, it's supposed to be essentially tasteless. So if you don't really know, you're gonna like. I don't think I would be able. I mean, I would probably be Able to tell if I'm drinking some cheap ass shit, but I don't think I'd be able to tell the difference. I would get scammed here.
A
The only two that I wouldn't be able to tell the difference if it's mixed with something is Grey Goose and Finlandia. And I believe that they're made in the same distillery.
B
Oh, really? That's the other thing. A lot of these are like the same company. It's just like filter three times versus four times.
A
It's like how Procter and Gamble has all their competing soaps, which I love because they're like, look, there's gonna be some haters who just aren't gonna buy Tide, cuz they just hate on Tide. So we gonna give them niggas gain and that's still gonna be money for us. Like they have competing brands that you're still all giving your money to Proctor and Gamble, no matter what brand do you like? Because they have so many. Okay, so yeah, liquor companies do that too. But this is crazy because. Well, first of all, is Roberto Cavalli better than Grey Goose? Because the, the order here is like dissension. So Grey Goose is not. Grey Goose is better than Svetka. Svetka is better than Smirnoff. So I'm guessing, like if you order Smirnoff, they probably was giving you pop
B
off if they, I mean, they were giving you the shit that doesn't really have a label. You know, label looks like they cooked
A
up in the back.
B
Okay. In a, in a, in a, A bathtub. Yep.
A
Moonshine.
B
Basically. Basically, we were giving moonshine to our poorer guests.
A
They won't notice and we'll keep all the profits. I've never worked at a restaurant that did exactly this, but this is shady. Like if I'm paying for. I didn't know Roberto Cavalli was better than Grey Goose. I did not know that because what is. I thought Roberto Cavalli wasn't as good.
B
Google it, find out. Because that's gonna change how she feels about this scam.
A
I am an alcohol snob. Okay, so it's from Italy and it's a luxury high end vodka. Okay. Okay. So yeah, it should be. But if I got Grey Goose and I ordered Roberto Cavalli, I would not know. That would be fine. Well, so this is a little shady, y'. All. Cause you're not giving people what they paid for.
B
This is also, in addition to being shady, I would say this is also illegal as far.
A
Oh yeah. It actually is against the law. It's against the dram shop laws. You're right about that. You're not allowed to trick people like that. Cause it's innocent. It's like I asked for a specific poison and you giving me different poison.
B
Okay? And then also, like, some, you know, some different, you know, brands do different things. And some things people might have allergies to, people might have issues with. And you know, that shit is dangerous.
A
Like gluten free vodka. My favorite thing is people who are like, no, I only drink potato vodkas, like Chopin and blah blah. Bitch is still poison, okay? It's all poison. They're like, no, but this poison's better for my skin.
B
I don't. I'm not even a hater.
A
I'm like, hey, but listen, whatever it is, I mean, like, everyone knows in LA there's super. There's like lifestyle influencers. Like people who are really into yoga and people who are really into like. I remember I knew a girl who did cocaine that had B12 in it.
B
I think I knew that girl too.
A
She was like, no, but there's B12 in it, so it's better. It's like, good for energy and circulation. Like, no, it's cocaine.
B
She really meant it too. She really thought she was doing something well for herself. She was like, no, no, no, no.
A
I can B12 straight to the brain. Definitely.
B
Good for you, 100%.
A
So the second liquor scam was they would only have a few bottles of nicer Pinot Grigio for the party events. Now, okay, so this is a private party probably or birthday party or something like that. Now we did used to run some scams when I worked at a high end restaurant. And they would do like parties where we charged by the bottle. So I would be getting everybody drunk. I would be, oh, my gosh. Like, if it was a high end, like liqueur, like a hibiki or something like that, like a scotch, I'd be like, one for you one, one for you, one for my other waiter. I'll just put something like, I was horrible. I would run people's bills up so high. They used to call me the Mercenary.
B
She had a nickname, ladies and gentlemen.
A
But I would always give people what they asked for. I wouldn't give them no bootleg stuff. So they said that they would only have a few nicer bottles of Pinot Grigio, no issue. If they ran out of the nice bottle, they would take the bottle, pour the remainder in the host glass so that the person who's paying the money still Sipping on that. Good, good, smart. And then they would. Then they would take the empty in the back and then they'd use a funnel, a trusty funnel, and pour in some vindan. Do you know what vindan is? Because I do.
B
No, what is vintage?
A
If you go to Walgreens and you go to the wine section and you go. And it be like in some little cardboard bottles with a cap. So it's a shape like a bottle, but it's a cardboard with a plastic cap. It's called vindange. And it'd be like 3.99.
B
Okay, I think I vaguely remember this. Yes. Yeah, a little bit.
A
Uh huh. Yes. So they pour in the vindange, re cork the bottle, and then go ahead and put on a show at the table, uncork it, pour. And one large vind bottle would fill at least two bottles of the $48 Pinot Grigio. He said, P.S. sometimes we would use it as house wine, but mostly vindange was for cooking. Because Vidanj is not good wine.
B
It's trash. It's boxed wine.
A
And I mean, right? And look, not all box wines are bad because sometimes they box it because they like, care about the cork, trees and the environment. But most box wine is trash. Remember when we went to that vineyard?
B
Oh, yeah.
A
About wine. Yeah. Because like, the difference between like these cheaper wines is like, they have a lot of sulfates in them because they're batched much larger. And so they need the sulfates to preserve the wine so it doesn't go bad. And in turn, that kind of gives you more headaches in the morning. I'm personally allergic to sulfites, so it gives me pretty bad headaches if I'm drinking anything that's kind of cheap. And.
B
Yeah.
A
But also, like, guys, it may not be the cheapness of the alcohol that's getting you a headache in the morning. It also can be how much you drink of it. I had a friend who was like, I can't drink a Patron. And I was like, girl, you drank like half a bottle and we had to carry you out the club. It's not an allergy. Like, you drank too much of it.
B
I love how she's like, no, I
A
just don't touch the stuff.
B
I love how, like, you have to tell people that. FYI, it could also be how much you drank.
A
Right? Cause people love to be like, no, it just always gives me a headache. I'm like, well, how much did you have? That's also your body can't process all that it's like one drink per hour for your liver.
B
I've never understood people who are like, I can't drink dark liquor. I can't drink or I only drink light liquor. Or I can't drink dark this or dark. Like, come on.
A
She and make you sin.
B
Okay, that tequila makes me crazy. Okay, does it?
A
Does it?
B
Are you sure or are you just crazy and drinking tequila?
A
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The crazy or the tequila? I'm gonna guess the crazy came first.
B
Okay. Come on.
A
So they're using basically cooking wine and upselling it to $48 a bottle.
B
And like the whole.
A
And what's also crazy about this is guys, if you throw a big party or you're paying for some specific wine. Cause some restaurants will try to get over on you. You gotta make sure that you're watching them when they're uncorking the bottle. They should also be cutting off the plastic on top of it or like the foil. So if you don't see them cutting the foil, that bottle might be reused.
B
That could be a pre recorked. A precorked re corked bottle. Okay, I just wanna know. Shout out to the person who can re cork it.
A
So.
B
Well, you know how hard it is to re cork a bottle. Girl, I'll be breaking a sweat every time I try to preserve my little bit of wine left. You know how hard and to make it look good. Congratulations. You deserve that scam.
A
So homemade versus baked in house. They was doing all the scams at this place.
B
I'm just gonna say this is an Italian restaurant. As someone from New Jersey, I'm not really surprised at what I'm reading right now. Go ahead.
A
Right. So straight up they said that homemade versus baked in house. Straight up. Italian desserts out the wazoo. But most ordered in markup was insane. So like $8 for a slice of cake. 16 slices to the cake. A cake purchased is $40. However, encouraged, they were encouraged to say that it was baked in house. Because some of the things truly were baked in house. Because we did. We did buy them pre baked and then we warmed them up. I can't.
B
Oh my God. Wait, does he say. Does he say par baked as in like partly baked?
A
Yes, par baked.
B
I didn't know that was a word, but I love it.
A
I think he made it up, but
B
it makes perfect sense. It's par baked.
A
And we have some lovely par baked desserts. I'm like, oh, that sounds fancy. They're like, no, we partially baked it in.
B
They need to be Cooked.
A
On occasion, they would get brownie mix and add chocolate chips. Now, when people say baked in house, they mean like, you have a pastry chef or there's like, a patisserie, and they're cooking with fresh ingredients. Y' all going out here and getting Pillsbury talking about baked in house.
B
So rude. So rude. I mean, this is the classic Thanksgiving, you know, scam. This is the classic Christmas scam. All the holidays, whatever you be celebrating, this is a classic scam. You know, go to the store, get the par baked or pre baked, whichever. You choose dessert, and pass it off as your own. I mean, it's a classic. It's a classic.
A
I can always tell when somebody didn't home, make a pie or a dessert, though. Like, I can you tell from looking at that? Yeah, for the most part, I can tell when it's store bought.
B
Lacey's like, don't ever bring no bullshit around Lacey when it comes to food or liquor is what she's telling you.
A
I worked at the restaurant industry for a long time, so apparently they were also scamming the employees. The owners charged $2 every time the employee clocked in in case they ate a slice of pizza, drank soda, et cetera. For that, you bet your ass. Everyone consumed, like, at least 10. $10 worth of food.
B
How dare the ownership do this shit? How are you gonna charge your employees to show up to work just in case they fuck you over?
A
That's like $10 a week. If you work five days a week, that they take it from you because they're like, just in case your ass gets a little hungry on the job or you want some. 2.
B
How rude. How rude. $2 every time an employee clocked in. How. How can. Damn. This place was just. This place was off the motherfucking chain.
A
So also, all employees would come in one Saturday morning for a cleaning day. This was a deep clean of the restaurant where no one could clock in, but it would be bonding in quotes. I clocked in and made a sandwich doing just enough to fall under the radar. I know that's right. You know, especially Italian restaurants, they be trying to say, we're family, nigga. No, we not family. I am your employee, okay?
B
Don't ever get. That's the biggest scam. The family scam. That's how they get you, right?
A
I saw a tweet on Twitter. I wish I could think of who wrote it, but it was like, anytime a business says, we're family, they're about to ask you to do something outside the scope of your job. Okay, for no money.
B
Maybe also illegal as well.
A
You're not family with your employers. And that's something that Americans have conned. They have conned that for so long. Especially, like during those pandemic times with all those we're here for you commercials. Like, bitch Snickers. If you really here for me, run me some money. Okay, Burger King, if you hear from me, drop off free Whoppers. Like, what you mean?
B
We know you're at home, take your money alone, suffering with your children, teaching them. But if you buy yourself a Snickers bar, all your problems will go away. And so will the COVID And that's why we're sponsoring COVID 19.
A
Take a break. I saw a commercial that was literally just like that. But it was like Milano cookies. And it was a woman sitting on her bathroom floor, and the tub was filled with children's toys, and she had locked the door. And the kid was like, mommy, Mommy, Mommy. From outside the door, she was like, it's your dad. She takes a bite of the cookie, and they're like, you gave your kids everything. Don't give them your Milanos.
B
Oh, my God, It's a goddamn pandemic. Share the Milanos.
A
Nope, you gotta have something for yourself in the pandemic. And it's Milano cookies.
B
Oh, my.
A
On the floor of your bathroom, hiding from your children.
B
Oh, God. Oh, gosh, I love corporate America.
A
God, they're monsters. So also, employees, when they would receive paychecks, they were told when they could cash them.
B
This fucking restaurant. I need the name and the Yelp page for this goddamn restaurant.
A
I want it so badly. Like, how you gonna give me a post dating check? And I work for you. Give me my money now.
B
How?
A
And then this the Bruce guy says, though he absolutely cashed his checks at their bank and then deposited the cash at his bank when he wanted. So he went to their bank to make sure he got his coins smart. Cash.
B
Bruce had to scam the scammer.
A
You should scam the scammer. Don't let the scammer run the scam on you. Okay, so also, scammer scamming the government is the last bullet. Here. It says cash is the best. When a customer pays in cash, it would be nice to not pay taxes on it. So they would get rid of the ticket. They would delete the ticket in the system and put the cash to the side and say something like, object in food or customer returned or never made, etc. Basically, he was taking cash receipts and voiding them and keeping the cash, which is a crime. He was doing a restaurant.
B
It's a crime. But I mean, I feel like I may know some people I don't know whose names rhyme with Priscilla Havees who may or may not have done things like this. This is a legit look. That's a. To me, that's a standard restaurant crime.
A
Right. You know what's crazy? When I worked at a restaurant in the Hamptons and it was really high end, but it was like a shit show on the backside. Like, we had a chef who. He was kind of cute, actually. He was very angry as a lot of, like, high end chefs are like Gordon Ramsay and stuff. Like, that's a real trope. Like, them niggas be mad for, I don't know, I guess they're under a lot of pressure.
B
It's hot and it's hot. The kitchen's hot. And it's very intense back there.
A
Yes. I remember one time we. Because we had a prefix menu. So everything was like, you had a certain amount of choices. You could not make any substitutions or alterations to most of the food unless it was like an allergy. Some would be accepted. And one time somebody tried to make a change to a dish that wasn't allowed. And the guy went back there. His name was Fernando. Shout out to Fernando. And our chef threw a pot at his head.
B
Oh, my God.
A
He was like, I said, no substitutions and threw this pot at this man's head.
B
That's horrible.
A
I know. But it was exciting. At the time, I was very young. I was like, woo. I work in high. I was like, I'm waiting on Paul McCartney. The chef is throwing pots at people's hands. This is exciting.
B
You thought you were on Top Chef.
A
I did think I was on Top Chef and I love mess, so. But when I was doing that, we had our manager, who was an awful guy, and he was like a really big cokehead and would disappear during another
B
very common thing in the restaurant industry.
A
Right. Coke and method. And he would disappear during his shifts. So eventually I had learned all the manager codes and I would just close everybody out for the end of the night, run everybody's reports, like, do all the managerial activity count everybody's money? Like, and I was not supposed to be doing this. And when the owners found out, they were like, lacey, you've been doing a great job. But, like, how do we know you weren't stealing? And I was like, that hadn't even occurred to me.
B
Damn right.
A
I could have been voiding out huge cash because people Would pay thousands in cash. But I was like, I was never, like, a thief, thief. So I was like, no, I'm just doing my job. Like, that's not my job.
B
Right? That's crazy. Restaurants are messy. There are some of the messiest fucking places on the planet.
A
Mm. So we have another restaurant story here. I need another name.
B
Let's call this person Melanie.
A
Melanie. So Melanie says, I'm a restaurant manager, and I've been in the industry for nine years. At one cafe I worked at, the owner was running a wonderful scam. Her business was booming.
B
A wonderful scam.
A
A wonderful scam.
B
She says it like it's a. It was a delightful, just pleasant, wonderful scam.
A
I mean, when you think about robbery, you know, you know, I just.
B
I get warm inside.
A
Splendid comes to mind. Splendid caper. She said that business was booming and successful and that she paid her employees well. Okay, See, if you pay your employees well on the con, see, that's how you do it, okay? Because when you cheat the people who work for you, and they know that you're doing criminal shit, that's how you get caught.
B
Because people will get mad, without a doubt. You got to do that Robin Hood style, right?
A
So she said. Melanie said I worked in the kitchen as well as the front of house. Important to note that this was a cash only business without a POS System. Very low key, regular register situation with manual written checks and kitchen tickets. See, whenever I go to a place
B
that's cash only, I'm already tired just hearing that. I remember these days, like, they just have. I think I've worked at restaurants. They don't have a POS. Yeah, like, that type of. Oh, God. It's just.
A
It's like automatic. I know you're doing crime.
B
You think?
A
I once had a bartend Ice. I used to substitute bartend. Damn. I've had so many jobs in New York. There was this big thing where you could substitute bartend at places where you weren't employed. But when employees needed, like, a night off, like, I just had so many friends in the industry, they'd be like, come fill in for me and my job. I'm going on vacation this weekend or whatever. One of these places was like a nightclubby spot in the East Village, and they had this kind of POS system where, like, they had a credit card runner where you would put the amount in and. And they had written tabs. So imagine a nightclub, but when people open a tab, I had to take their card, clip it with a paperclip to their tab. And write their drinks on this paper tab and then add it up at the end and ring them up. But also, it's a nightclub, so I'm speed bartending.
B
Yeah. Those restaurants, those bars is just, like, such a bitch. It's such a headache. It's like when you see your bartender, like, pull out a pen and start writing shit. That's when I'm like, you know what? I'm just drink this liquor I brought in my pocket.
A
I'm gonna get out my sunscreen that's definitely filled with Hennessy, and I'll just be drinking that in the club. Okay. But it was. I would be sweating, bruh. It was a great workout. But, you know, at the end of the night, I'd be making, like four or five hundred dollars. So I was like, this is worth it for one night of work in New York City. But this has also always been a red flag to me of, like, something right at the job. If y' all won't go ahead and fully digitize. Remember that one place that we always had New Year's Eve at in la? I won't say the name because they're still very much operating the one that
B
we just had New Year's Eve at. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
A
Okay. So they do this. They do this where they don't have the POS system, where they just, like, run your card at the end with the amount. And we all know that place is a drug front.
B
Oh, is it?
A
How the hell else are they staying open with three customers every day? Except for when we decide to throw a party there.
B
I mean, I guess that's why I assume it's always popping, because I only go there for party.
A
I don't think I've ever dead dead in there.
B
Oh, then it's definitely a drug front.
A
Right? So anyways, back to this story. They. They're not using the POS system. So she says that they had something under the register called the bowl. During busy days, they would take some of the checks and the cash and dump it into the bowl instead of ringing it in on the register. So on a day where they had, like, $3,000 in sales, they would put like a third of it in the. In the checks into the bowl. They said. The manager says that the owner paid them half of their hours in cash and half in a check, which was great. Especially those who were getting government assistance or state health insurance. It looked as though they only worked half as much as they did, and they were able to get plenty of assistance while making decent money. The Owner of this restaurant is a total queen and made sure her staff was taken care of. I made tons of money at this joint and I miss working for her. I only stopped because I moved across the country. Not sure if she's still running this little scam, but damn, I respect the hell out of it.
B
Oh, so, okay, so what? Okay, so what was the scan? What, what's the scam here?
A
So she's like under reporting her earnings. So in. So if they sold 3,000 on one day, they only reported 2,000. And then she used that other thousand to like pay out the employees half of their hours.
B
Oh, what? Now I see why she called this a wonderful scam.
A
Because really, they're only scamming the government.
B
Yeah, this is a wonderful scam. Melanie, you were right. Oh, I'm like, I've never met a good person who ran a restaurant. I'm just saying the people who run, whether it's owners or managers, are usually fucked up or some version of just like out of their mind. And this is pretty. Go ahead, girl, go ahead. I wonder what the boss's name is. I'll call her Sheila.
A
She almost sounds like a nice name. Like a little old lady named Sheila. Yeah, Sometimes the scams are positive because, I mean, honestly, the government's scamming all of us. So if y' all need to run a little scam on the government, go right ahead. You know, at least you're not scamming your employees. Cause that first Italian restaurant was scamming everybody involved. The guests, the employees, scamming anybody.
B
Anybody within like a 2 mile radius of the restaurant. You would be scammed. I wish you would walk in front of this restaurant right now, right?
A
And then we're like, where did my money go?
B
Okay, $2. $2.
A
So this last one came straight out of the Zeitgeist. And guys, it's just a heads up when you're ordering from delivery services because some of them are doing some shady shit. So. Some of them.
B
Most of them, right.
A
I actually, for a brief, brief time back in the day, tried to work for DoorDash as a DASH delivery person. And it was awful and the money was terrible. And you just sat around your car waiting a lot. And they had like these info sessions. So that's all you had to do. You had to go to this info session that was at some random emptied out place that they were renting in West Hollywood. And you go in and they give you a dasher card and they give you. What else would they give you? That's it. They would pretty much just give you this little card to pay for stuff, and then they would encourage you to go buy your own food warmer, and you would sit through a video, and
B
then you were a doordasher, buy your own equipment. Oh, God. It's just like, why do we have to get scammed like this? Listen, when the revolution comes, it's already here during the pandemic. But it's like, don't be mad, okay? Don't be mad when we come kicking the door, waving the 4.
A
4. Okay, right?
B
Like, what the fuck? Okay.
A
I feel like we're so close. Our government just keeps saying, let them eat cake. And we like, aight, we gonna eat this cake. Anime so this is how a pizza shop owner reportedly turned DoorDash's own fee structure against it. So DoorDash and other apps are reportedly milking small businesses to death with fees and commissions. And one pizza place got really tired of it. So obviously, when we're going through this pandemic, a lot of people are ordering in more. The delivery apps have been booming. Their stock is up. They're doing great. Delivery services like Grubhub, Uber Eats, and DoorDash are racking up the orders, but the restaurants actually making the food are feeling the squeeze as middlemen. Those delivery services charge fees, commissions to the restaurant, to the restaurant they work with. So they charge fees and commissions to the restaurants that they work with, sometimes as high as 30% in cities or states that haven't regulated them. According to the Los Angeles Times, one especially notorious example was a Chicago pizzeria owner, Giuseppe Buralamenti. Oh, that is just the most Italian name. I love it. Hey, Giuseppe. He said he shared his March invoices from Gut grubhub and. And after commissions, fees, and adjustments and promotions, he was left with a mere $376.54 of his restaurant's $1,042.63 profit.
B
God damn. God damn. God damn.
A
So at least one restaurant has been able to strike back, which I love. I love when the scammers get it back. So basically, there's a price discrepancy that is the result of DoorDash scraping data from the restaurant's website because of the layout. So DoorDash was pricing their specialty pizzas at $24, which is the same price as the basic cheese one, which is $16. If a customer ordered a specialty pizza, they only paid $16 to DoorDash, while DoorDash had to pay the full $24 to the restaurant. When they picked up the pizza, in other words, it was the perfect recipe for a short grift. So apparently, DoorDash is just scraping these prices off of the website. And, you know, it's probably an app that does it or a bot or whatever, and they fucked up the price. And so this restaurant owner, Roy, realized that they would have. DoorDash was paying him the difference because they had to. And Roy crunched some numbers and found out that if his friend ordered 10 pizzas himself, he'd make about $10 in profit after the cost of ingredients. But if he just put less toppings and less dough in the box, after all, it's his friend. He's not gonna complain for receiving the delivery. The profit jumps to $75 of every order of 10 pizzas. So Roy's friend reportedly tried this for several nights, partly because they were both curious to see how long it would take DoorDash to notice. Apparently, DoorDash never noticed. So these people decided to start ordering pizzas from their own restaurant off of DoorDash and. And DoorDash had to pay them the difference in the markup. I think this is a wonderful scam.
B
I supported one thou. Wow. I feel like these fucking. You know, I don't know if I've ever. I probably have complained to you about my issues with these goddamn delivery. These delivery apps, they have just taken over a market, and it's just like. I guess the regulations haven't caught up to them yet, but I just feel like they abuse customers and they abuse the restaurants, you know, and it's fucking crazy how much they get away with. And they charge an arm and a leg. It's like you're getting charged to get treated like shit. And then they're screwing the restaurants over. They deserve every single bit of that. Fuck them. And, you know, and it's also endemic of, like, how dysfunctional how, like, messy they are. Like, there's no, like. It's kind of like a Wild west thing. So it's like y' all don't even notice that you're charging a completely different rate than what it is. And that's because you probably, like you said, have bots doing it or an algorithm doing it or something like that. And things fall through the cracks. So when you're being shady, things fall through the cracks, and those things can sometimes end up in you getting scammed yourself,
A
right? And it also sucks because, like, I thought that I was paying all of the fees to uber eats and DoorDash and all of these places because, like, they. When you order, you bitch, go on there, order yourself some frozen yogurt from whatever froyo spot. That should be like $8. Then when you click and it'd be like, ready to pay. That's $34,
B
bitch. Did you. I just.
A
I'm like, what are these, girl?
B
I just post. It was so crazy. I was literally. I had ordered like this meal. It was like a sandwich and three sides from lemonade. I don't know if they have lemonades all over, but they have them in la. They have them in California. And it's kind of like a Panera Bread, right? Kind of thing.
A
Yeah, it's like a Bougier Panera bread.
B
Yeah, there you go. Exactly. So I ordered a sandwich and three sides, bitch. My total was almost 40 bucks. And I like. And so I fucking, like. I tear. But the sandwich is bomb. I tear this shit up, girl. And then literally, like 30 minutes after I finish eating, I'm like scrolling on Instagram. And someone posted this video of this little baby. So cute. He's like two, eating a little McDonald's burger, crying while eating the McDonald's burger. And then the caption is like, me eating my $7 sandwich that I ordered for $50 on Uber Eats. I was like, they called me the hell out.
A
That's literally what happened. Because you ring that shit up and it'd be like, okay, taxes, fees, delivery fee, Sean's fee, David's fee, gas fee, air fee, walking fee, okay, open the car door fee. I'm like, all this shit, like, bitch, doorbell ringing fee. That's fatigue on the finger.
B
Okay, don't let us have to knock now.
A
Shit, that's an extra 20%. That's a bigger fee. Yeah. Okay, that's carpal tunnel. Yeah. So I'm happy for these people who ripped off doordash a little bit. Cause, like, also, I didn't know that they were charging commissions to the actual restaurants themselves. I thought we were paying all the fees. So the fact that they seeing everybody on every side and they not even using their own cars, girl, it's a big.
B
It's all those DoorDash, Grubhub, Uber Eats, all that shit. It's the hugest scam. It's a bunch of tech bros who found, like, a little loophole. And basically, until, like, what the article said that in some cities there's no caps on how much they can charge because the regulations just haven't caught up to them yet. But for real, for real, we the people need to fucking stick together. And I Know, it's hard. Cause they get you in your gut. You know what I'm saying? They get you when you're hungry. You know, I was ordering, actually ironically, the day that I ordered doordash. Literally, as soon as I was about to hit, like, go to checkout, all of a sudden, bitch, this disclaimer came up. I was like, y' all got me fucked up. It was like a 52 page disclaimer at the point where I had already put all my food in. You know what I'm saying? You really think I'm about to read this shit right now? And I'm starving? And that's how they do it. They do it. So I'm sure I signed away my first children. I get it, you know, for that. That sandwich, that was bomb from lemonade. Shout out to lemonade.
A
Now when Uber Eats comes back and they ask for that kidney that you told them you would put up, I mean, you'll have to give it up.
B
I enjoyed that sandwich.
A
And what's crazy is that Uber was trying to buy Grubhub recently in May 2020, May 12, they're making a play to acquire Grubhub, which I'm like, you. You can't be the food delivery conglomerate. Don't we have Monopoly rules? What happened to them?
B
Boy, my God. I mean, they went out the window a long time ago. Wow. I mean, will you make your business model better? Because if that's the case, then go ahead and I just. I have such, like. In addition to all that shit, it's also like when you go to call, like, customer service bitch, and then next thing you know, you're talking to someone on the other side of the world who doesn't know shit about nothing, and you like, what the fuck? I need help. I need the corporate number, please. Corporate. Corporate.
A
Nope, nope. You can stop that as much as you want.
B
Corporate. I need corporate. Get mad at the automated.
A
No, you're talking.
B
I said corporate.
A
So, guys, I mean, just be careful. If you know any local restaurants that do their own deliveries, try calling the restaurant. It'll be cheaper for you and for them. And there are still some restaurants who do their own deliveries. A lot of them have moved to these apps, but sometimes if you go on Yelp, it'll be like, oh, free pickup or delivery. And, you know, that might save you some coins. And also save them some coins.
B
Yeah.
A
All right, guys. That brings us to the end of this episode. Restaurant Scammers. Thank you to the listeners who wrote in all this. Where can people find you, Priscilla.
B
You guys can find me at priscilladaviesactor across all platforms. Yes.
A
And as always, you can email into the podcast for a chance to have your story featured@scamgodesspodmail.com youm can also find us @scamgoddesspod on all platforms. And you can find me D I V A L A C I Diva Lacey on all platforms for my shenanigans. All right, Congregation Stacy.
Host: Laci Mosley (Scam Goddess)
Guest Co-Host: Priscilla Davies
Release Date: August 5, 2020
Theme: A hilarious, behind-the-scenes exploration of restaurant scams – from liquor “upgrades” to employee exploitation, tips to avoid being conned, and a tale of a pizzeria that turned the tables on DoorDash.
This episode dives headfirst into the seedy, silly, and sometimes savvy world of restaurant scams. Laci Mosley and her co-host Priscilla Davies read listener-submitted “con-fessions,” dissect real-life rackets from liquor tampering to fake desserts, and offer sharp, comedic commentary on everything from bartending hustle to app-based delivery drama. The tone is irreverent, candid, and full of classic Scam Goddess comedic flair.
(Start – 19:38)
Liquor Bottle Swaps (01:08)
Wine Swap Scam (06:08)
Faux 'Homemade' Desserts (10:48)
Employee Exploitation (12:48)
Tax & Cash Skimming (16:28)
Restaurant Industry “Wild West” Anecdotes
(19:38 – 24:45)
Cash-Only Restaurant with Manual Written Checks
Owner skimmed a third of the register off the books (kept in an “under the register” bowl).
Employees paid half in cash, half with a check, letting staff qualify for government assistance while taking home more money.
“The owner of this restaurant is a total queen and made sure her staff was taken care of. I made tons of money at this joint...” (Melanie, quoted by Laci, 24:03)
Hosts hail this as a “Robin Hood” scam:
(25:50 – 36:28)
The Pandemic Delivery Goldrush
The Pizza Price Hack (29:15)
Critique of the Delivery Gig Economy
Epic Relatable Delivery Fee Rant
Key Tip to Avoid Getting Conned:
On liquor swaps:
“If you order Smirnoff, all caps, I don't know what the fuck you got.” (Laci, 01:39)
On breadwinning in the biz:
“They used to call me the Mercenary…I would always give people what they asked for. I wouldn't give them no bootleg stuff.” (Laci, 06:56)
Corporate “family” myth:
“That’s the biggest scam. The family scam. That’s how they get you, right?” (Priscilla, 14:00)
On government scam vs. owner scam:
“Sometimes the scams are positive because, I mean, honestly, the government's scamming all of us.” (Laci, 25:12)
On delivery app ridiculousness:
“That should be like $8. Then when you click and it'd be like, ready to pay. That's $34, bitch...gas fee, air fee, walking fee, ok, open the car door fee. I'm like, all this shit!” (Laci, 32:54)
DoorDash Pizza Scam
“Roy’s friend reportedly tried this for several nights ... Apparently, DoorDash never noticed. ... I think this is a wonderful scam.” (Laci, 30:09)
The episode is classic Scam Goddess: fast-paced, irreverent, and full of “insider” industry banter. Both hosts blend industry knowledge, listener anecdotes, and millennial urban commentary into a funny but revealing look at the overlapping scams that power, and sometimes bleed, the modern restaurant experience.
Priscilla Davies plugs her socials (@priscilladaviesactor), Laci reminds listeners to send in their own scam stories (scamgoddesspodmail.com), and they close out with a call to the “Congregation” to keep staying schemin'.
For anyone who’s ever waited tables, ordered delivery, or wondered if that “artisan” tiramisu was too good to be true—this episode will leave you laughing, nodding, and probably side-eyeing your next bar tab.