Con-Fessions: Shady Shams

Summary

Scam Goddess - Con-Fessions: Shady Shams

Host: Laci Mosley with co-host Priscilla Davies
Date: October 15, 2020

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Episode Overview

In this episode of Scam Goddess, Laci Mosley and co-host Priscilla Davies dive into listener-submitted scams, focusing on “shady shams”—the less glamorous, interpersonal cons that can happen to anyone. The hosts dissect why some scams feel more justified than others, how manipulation works, and the importance of trusting your instincts. With plenty of humor, personal anecdotes, and sharp cultural critique, they break down the mechanics of shady personal scams while encouraging listeners to protect themselves (but never lose their empathy).

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Types of “Good” vs “Bad” Scams

• Theme: Not all cons are created equal; some target corrupt systems, others prey on individuals.
  • Laci: “I love a scam on an institution that’s flawed and fucked up... But when it comes to just hurting an individual, we don’t fuck with that. That’s some weirdo shit.” [00:14]
  • Priscilla: “Unless they deserve it… Revenge scams are always a win.” [00:54]

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2. Listener Story #1: The Fake “Foot Science Project”

• Story Summary:

  • “Derek” (later “Derica”) tells of a campus creep (“Phineas”) asking women to participate in a fake “science project” about feet.
  • Phineas is a communications major, making the science angle suspicious.
  • Derek/Derica is approached by Phineas in the laundry room and is asked to remove shoes for examination and to “close your eyes”—setting off red flags.
  • Another student (“Mike”) helps her escape. University security dismisses Derica’s complaint until Phineas targets the daughter of the head of security, prompting an investigation that reveals a pattern of predatory behavior.
  • Phineas’s only punishment is a no-contact order.

  Memorable Analysis & Quotes:

  • Laci (on red flags): “You shouldn’t see a red flag and go, hmm. A red flag is a stop sign. A red flag is a deal breaker… There should only be one red flag.” [07:52]
  • Priscilla (on trusting instincts): “Hairs on the back of your neck stand at attention, and you feel that hot flash go through your body… You know what I’m talking about.” [08:49]
  • Laci (on institutions): “I love how universities want to rob you, but they don’t want to protect you. Bitch, you are robbing me blind. And your whole ass got the nerve to send me a damn email right after I graduated asking for a donation.” [14:45]
  • Priscilla (on bystander intervention): “If you see folks in uncomfortable situations and you can help without putting yourself in harm’s way, help them out a little bit.” [14:14]

  Notable Moments:

  • “Close your eyes for science” riff [11:01]
  • Shoutout to Mike, the helpful bystander [14:06]

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3. Trusting Your Instincts & The Pressure to Be Polite

• Societal critique:
  • Priscilla: “We’ve been trained to be nice, to quiet our fucking voice that’s telling us, ‘[This] is a [person] that you need to watch out for.’ Fuck polite.” [12:13]
  • Laci (on politeness): “Don’t let your politeness put you in a fucked up situation, basically.” [21:09]
• Advice Recap:
  • Beware of people giving too much information, making emotional pleas, or pressuring you in odd environments (e.g., a “science project” in a laundry room) [20:08–21:09]
  • Use any excuse to extricate yourself from uncomfortable interactions—pretend to get a call, act like you don’t hear them, just walk away. [21:20–21:45]

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4. Listener Story #2: Times Square Fashion Week Cash Scam

• Story Summary:

  • “Loquacious” recounts an ex-best-friend (“gullible ass friend”) helping a man claiming to be a Fashion Week designer who lost his gown and wallet.
  • The scammer weaves an emotional story and pressures for money, receiving $40 (and almost more) under the guise of soon repaying.
  • Only later does the friend realize she’s been had.

  Analysis & Perspective:

  • Laci (on emotional cons): “When anybody comes up to you telling you an emotional story, you really have to watch out. I’m not going to say don’t help people… but there are people who take advantage.” [24:01]
  • Priscilla (on frustration): “You making it so uncomfortably easy. Take this $10 back.” [23:50]

  Fun Tangent:

  • Discussion about not becoming hardened or bitter when occasionally scammed, especially over small amounts, because it’s impossible to vet every request for help and sometimes “it’s performance art!” [28:03]

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5. Listener Story #3: The Classic Paycheck Scam

• Story Summary:

  • “McGillicuddy” shares how a friend, seeking good karma, lets a stranger deposit a “paycheck” in her bank, gives him $1,000 cash, and only later discovers it’s a fraudulent check. The man disappears, unreachable by phone.

  Key Commentary:

  • Laci (on karma): “You can’t intentionally set yourself up for some prepaid karma… She was trying to scam the universe.” [29:56]
  • Both hosts riff on the recurring nature and variations of the paycheck/cash-out scam—don’t deposit someone else’s check! [31:52]
  • Priscilla: “There’s so many variations on this same core ass scam—that’s how popular it is.” [31:52]

  Notable quote:

  • Laci: “Don’t cash nobody’s check for them. Guys, one more time: Do not cash nobody’s god damn motherfucking check.” [31:52]

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6. On Empathy & Scam “Bipartisanship”

• Empathy for the scammed and the scammer:
  • The hosts encourage listeners not to let being scammed make them hard-hearted, especially for small-time frauds, as you can never fully know someone’s situation. [26:19–26:54]
  • But: If a situation feels wrong, prioritize your safety and just walk away. [26:54]

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7. Memorable Tangents & Cultural Critique

• On New York City toughness:
  • “New York City is like—BANG! POW!—and the whole time you’re getting your ass beat, you’re running late.” [35:41]
  • “NYC is as hard as Viola Davis’ walk.” [36:42]
• On gender and institutional bias:
  • “Stop waiting until you have daughters to be like, Women’s is people. People is women.” [16:08]
• Performance art digression featuring Shia LaBeouf and BDSM. [28:15]

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Practical Takeaways & Advice

• Red flags are stop signs. Trust your gut.
• Don’t let politeness override your self-protection.
• Be wary of emotional manipulation and overly detailed stories.
• You’re not obligated to help or respond—use an excuse, walk away.
• Never cash/deposit checks for strangers.
• Helping someone who turns out to be a scammer isn’t a character flaw; don’t harden your heart, just be smart.
• Support each other—be the “Mike” in the laundry room.

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• On red flags:
  “Red flags aren’t red flags. You shouldn’t see a red flag and go, hmm… There should only be one red flag.” — Laci, [07:52]
• On politeness vs. safety:
  “We’ve been trained to like, you know, be nice, to quiet our fucking voice…” — Priscilla, [12:13]
• On institutions failing women:
  “Your daughter could have avoided this if you had done your fucking job.” — Priscilla, [16:38]
• On scammer storytelling:
  “Whenever someone is talking a lot, it’s a sign that it’s likely a lot of bullshit coming out.” — Priscilla, [06:53]
• On the frequency of scam types:
  “That’s how popular [the check scam] is… The Nigerian scam is just a variation of that.” — Priscilla, [31:52]
• On walking away:
  “Any excuse and walk away… You’re not even obligated to say anything—walk the fuck away.” — Laci & Priscilla, [21:20-21:45]
• On the scammer's energy:
  “He’s a communication science freak. Science freak. He wants your feet.” — Laci, [18:07]

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Episode Flow (with Timestamps for Key Segments)

• [00:02] Welcoming and main theme: separating “good” (systemic) scams from “shady shams”
• [01:11–15:24] Listener Story #1: “Phineas” and the foot scam + red flag discussion
• [15:24–19:41] Bystander intervention, how institutions dismiss complaints, recap of how scammer was investigated
• [20:08–22:02] Comprehensive checklist: scam red flags, trusting instincts, and advice for listeners
• [22:08–26:19] Listener Story #2: Times Square “designer” scam, reflections on empathy and giving
• [26:19–27:52] Empathy vs. cynicism in scam culture, performance art as a metaphor for scamming
• [29:04–34:02] Listener Story #3: The classic check scam and the myth of “karma”
• [34:12–37:05] Tangent: New York City, toughness, and scam survival
• [37:12–38:35] Wrap-up: Empathy, bipartisanship for scamming (scam institutions, not people!), how to submit your story

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Tone & Style

True to Scam Goddess style, the episode is fast-paced, irreverent, and sharply funny, often veering into improv and playful dragging (especially toward the scammers and enabling institutions). The hosts riff affectionately on personal and pop culture references while keeping practical scam-prevention advice at the heart of every story.

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Useful For...

Anyone interested in understanding how emotional manipulation and everyday scams work; those who want practical, street-smart advice on avoiding being scammed, without losing their empathy or humor about the absurdity of con artists.

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As Laci always says, stay schemin’!

Transcript

[A]

What's poppin, congregation? And welcome back, I'm your host, Lacey Mosley, joined by my co host, Priscilla Davies.

[B]

Hello congregation.

[A]

So we wanted to just kind of go in a more general direction of Shadiness. So the scams that you guys wrote in about feature some really shady characters doing some shady things. And I love scams. But. But I don't want y' all to get scammed by shady people, you know what I mean? I love a scam on an institutional that's flawed and fucked up.

[B]

A scam on the up and up, you know?

[A]

Right. A scam on the American capitalistic society that has its foot on all of our necks. Like, I love those scams. But when it just comes to interpersonal scams where you're like, you know, just hurting an individual on the street, like, we don't fuck with that. That's some weirdo shit.

[B]

Unless they deserve it.

[A]

Yes, if they deserve it, then that's cool.

[B]

But revenge scams are always a win.

[A]

So I need a name for this first person.

[B]

This first person is Derek.

[A]

Derek. So Derek says this took place my freshman year of college and I had heard rumors that this guy named Finn, real name has been changed. Oh good, great. Cause I already read it.

[B]

Oops, apologies to all the Finneas McGee's out there.

[A]

Finneas. Phineas McGhee was acting all creepy and asking a few select girls around campus if he could take a look at their feet for a so called science project. It didn't make a lot of sense because Phineas was a communications major. And why the hell would some professor assign a college student what a middle schooler could do in their fucking sleep? Fast forward. I'm casually doing laundry one day in my dorm and Phineas walks in. So quick pause here. Phineas, you are a communication major.

[B]

Derrick, did you have to drag Phineas like that?

[A]

You didn't have to drag him like that because communication majors can be anything they want to be. They can be anyone they want to be.

[B]

He said what a middle schooler could do in their sleep. Ouch.

[A]

People with communications degree go on to do all types of. Of communications.

[B]

Communications. I don't know.

[A]

I'm not a communications major. Communications.

[B]

I actually started as a communications major in college. No, I didn't. I like took a class or two and I was like, it's not for me. But I had fun while I was there.

[A]

I think, you know, like you can go into a lot of different areas. A lot of people will be comm majors and they'll End up being lawyers like a lot of people, you know, take it and go on a different path. Because, you know, there's no like pre law. There's a pre law track, but there's no like pre law major for most institutions. So it's like you pick a specific major and then you like, you know, take the LSATs.

[B]

Communications is just one of those majors that you do.

[A]

It gets a lot of shade. Communications gets a lot of shade.

[B]

Like I feel like at least once a semester every student goes, what are we doing here? Profit. We majored in vague, vague ambiguity. What you learning?

[A]

Stuff.

[B]

But they be getting jobs after college though.

[A]

Listen, they do. Okay, so what you learning? Many things.

[B]

All the things.

[A]

All the things. I am every woman. It's all in me.

[B]

And bitch, I could give a motherfucking speech.

[A]

Right?

[B]

Communications, they communicate, right?

[A]

So many people are bad communicators. So no shade to the communications measures. But also, Derek, you really drugged the fuck out of my man Phineas. But he is a creep and he deserved it. If any man is asking you to see pictures of they feet for a science project, two things should ring out there for you. One, what kind of science project and where are we? Not in a lab. You haven't invited me to a lab to do a study.

[B]

Like what kind of science? That's the first question you ask.

[A]

Yeah, you're right. I've skipped two steps.

[B]

What kind of science?

[A]

Step one. What kind of science? Step two. Why?

[B]

Why? You know, I have to say I'm starting to feel a little type of way because I think I got conned by Phineas cousin at my school. No, I did a fucking project about tattoos.

[A]

What am I?

[B]

Yes, and I. But actually I got a good, a really beautiful picture out of it. But it was like a photography thing. But at least hopefully he was an actual photographer. We'll never know.

[A]

No, we won't. Or maybe we will. Let's see what Derek tells us. So Derek is approached doing laundry one day and in walks Phineas. So I'm a guess that Derek is actually a woman. Okay, but we're going to leave it at Derek.

[B]

Cause they're doing laundry.

[A]

You know, things that women do with ovaries.

[B]

Cause men never do laundry. Especially not in college.

[A]

So Phineas looks like a quintessential middle aged, hairy, slightly chubby Italian American man from Long Island, New York, but allegedly is 18 years old and incredibly socially awkward. He just looks creepy from start to finish.

[B]

This is getting weird.

[A]

Wow, Derek. Derek really does not like Phineas at All, I mean, any chance to just drag the shit out of him. Anytime that Derek can lay out a forest of shade.

[B]

Derek wants all the smoke.

[A]

He wants all the smoke. So I realize at this point I know Phineas because I knew his roommates. He says hello, I say hi back. And then he goes into this monologue on his foot project. He elaborately describes how he is mid semester currently female, failing his science lab classes, but his professor is giving him a break if he completes a project of the professor's choosing which happens to be on the foot. He adamantly claims he did not want to pick the foot. So here are some things, guys, excuses. Anytime somebody's trying to give you. First of all, he's trying to get you to be empathetic because he's failing his classes. His science classes. What is science class in college? They don't have science class in college.

[B]

But it's not necessarily the science classes in the science building. Okay, right.

[A]

That's not even in high school. That's in middle school. In middle school you have general science class, but when you get to high school, it's more specific.

[B]

Biology, chemistry, guys.

[A]

Physics. You don't have general science at college.

[B]

There's just so many words. And whenever someone is talking a lot, it's a sign that it's likely a lot of bullshit coming out.

[A]

Right? Anytime. So many excuses before you even ask questions as to answer the questions before you ask. That means that they have thought of everything because they want to get you to put your guard down. And that's how people do this. Also, this happens in relationships, guys. If you go on a date with a and they tell you everything, like, oh, I'm trying to do this and blah, blah, blah.

[B]

My baby mama and she always tripping.

[A]

What? What was that, baby? What? Oh, yeah, I have four. Anyways, the calamari is delicious. Here I am trying to be an

[B]

astronaut by like that.

[A]

I'm in astronaut school at the moment. Like, if people are just trying to sell themselves too much to you up top, something's off.

[B]

Clearly. Also, for a communications major, you probably should be a little bit more effective in your communication, right?

[A]

Like, this isn't even great scam communication. And also, guys, red flags aren't red flags. You shouldn't see a red flag and go, hmm, A red flag is a stop sign. A red flag is a deal breaker. If you let red flags build up, then it's your fault. There should only be one red flag.

[B]

I mean, listen, and I'm being generous. Cause I'm a Kind person. I'm like, lacey, listen, have I ignored

[A]

many, many red flags? And then I was like, oh, this is on me now. Yes.

[B]

But here's the thing. I feel like red flags, too. I feel like you get. I feel like it's like three strikes. You get three. And I'm not mad at you. One. Come on. You gotta be really on your game to stop after one. I can't believe I'm justified.

[A]

Because you're a scammer. We need people to get to the point where one is a done. Now. Now, if that doesn't mean flaws, that doesn't mean. That doesn't mean, like, stuff that people are working on. That just means stuff where you're like, this doesn't seem right.

[B]

Where, you know, the hairs on the back of your neck stand at attention and you feel that hot flash go through your body. You know what I'm talking about.

[A]

Someone says, foot project

[B]

for science, but

[A]

there are communications, and you're in a laundry room.

[B]

The setting gives away a lot.

[A]

Y' all definitely. Like, if somebody's trying to do some professional shit and you look around and you are not in a professional environment, chances are that shit is not legitimate. Anybody on Instagram trying to help you make money, that's not where you supposed to get into a business, okay?

[B]

This is not LinkedIn. It's Instagram. Get out of my DMS. However, I will click on this link.

[A]

I saw a tweet the other day, was like, hey, guys, hit me up if you want to turn $125 into $2,700. Don't worry, it's not a scram. We're selling crack. Don't worry, it's not a scam. We selling gray.

[B]

In that case, I support it. Cause at least they were upfront and honest and he knew what you were getting into.

[A]

Right? I appreciate that. So you know this guy. There's too much going on here that I can't really get behind. So he says, hey, I noticed that you're wearing flip flops and this guy is blocking the door. He goes, oh, no.

[B]

I know Derek is a woman now. Let's call her Derica.

[A]

We're gonna switch it up. Derica, we have to honor you, queen. He goes, it would be really quick and easy, and you're already wearing flip flops. Please. And then he starts begging. I'm stuck at this point because he's blocking the door. And I, low key, begin to panic. See, this is fucked. But then I decide to take control and see how far this freak is going with this scam. He starts to ask me questions about my feet, like what's my foot size? Ideal type of shoe, any foot pain? And then he was about to start examining my foot. Foot and he asked me to close my eyes.

[B]

That's when I would have screamed and ran out, hell no. Close your eyes for science.

[A]

I gotta close my eyes for science. You need your ass whooped, Phineas. You need your ass whooped. This is. And this is what I'm talking about. Guys. Like when you meet people and they seem off and they have a creepy vibe, just get the out of there. Because if you can. And I'm not going to put that on the responsibility of a woman because that's not her. We don't victim blame her.

[B]

Victim blame at scam. God.

[A]

But if you have a chance, if you have a chance, get the fuck out.

[B]

And you know what? And I'm going to. I just want to piggyback that. Because if anybody knows the story of Gabrielle Union, she talks about when she worked at Payless shoe store and a fucking motherfucker came in and she had a bad motherfucking feeling and he didn't even come in.

[A]

He was. The door was locked, she was closing and he was begging to come into the store and she had a bad feeling and she should have left the door locked. We're not going to get into the details of what happened because that's not what we do here, but figure it out. But she said that she had a feeling about the creepy guy at the door and she wished that she had left the door locked. Now that is not to say that anybody deserves anything that happens to them when predator predators, you know. No, but what we're saying though is that if you have a feeling, go ahead and trust it.

[B]

It's more important, you know, especially for women and women identifying folks and femmes out there. Like, you know, we've been trained to like, you know, be nice, to quiet our fucking voice that's telling us like this is a nigga that you need to watch out for or a person or a thing or whatever. We have been exactly been trained to be nice. And it's trained to be polite. Fuck polite. Exactly. And be more worried about this potential person's feelings that you don't even fucking know versus your safety.

[A]

And that man knew that because he started up top trying to get empathy, which is what dirty scammers do. Talking about, I'mma fail my classes, bitch. That sounds like a personal problem for you and your communications. That sound like something you need to be communicating with somebody else about, bitch. Cause you using communications all wrong. Now I know why you failing. You communicating over here. You need to be communicating over there. Why you communicating in laundry rooms? Communicate your ass back to school, bitch.

[B]

Communicate your ass out this door. And can I have three quarters, though? Do you have change for a dollar?

[A]

Right? Also, give me money. Wasting my damn time.

[B]

110%. It's important. And I think it's like fucking. We can stand up for yourself. And I know it's not easy, but we got your back. Just remember us saying this shit. We got your back, your spiritual back. Queen kings, everybody.

[A]

And everything in between.

[B]

Jesters as well.

[A]

Clowns. I hope some clowns listen to this show. So she said. Derica said, hell no. Close my eyes, bitch. You out of your mind. That's when Mike, a kid from French class, walked in to do his laundry. I gave him a look like, help me now. And he intervened to introduce himself to Finneas so that I could make my quick getaway. Shout out to Mike. Shout out to Mike.

[B]

Shout out to Mike. Knowing, like a look from a woman, a look of distress, right?

[A]

And, guys, we all owe it to ourselves in the community and out in these streets. If you see folks being in uncomfortable situations and you can help without putting yourself in harm's way, help them out a little bit. You know how many women I done danced off the dance floor because some sweaty man was behind them? And I'm like, hey, girl, my best friend. You know what I mean? Like, we can all do that shit to help one another get away from creepy scammers. So after telling my friend about the incident, she convinced me to tell the university security about it. They looked at me like I was a crazy girl making a big deal out of nothing. And they said they would not.

[B]

Surprise.

[A]

Not surprised. Fast forward a few weeks later. I love how universities want to rob you, but they don't want to protect you. Bitch, you are robbing me blind. And then your whole ass got the nerve to send me a damn email right after I graduated talking about, would I like to donate?

[B]

Bitch, I just donated my tuition. My tuition was a donation.

[A]

Like, how you gonna hit me up right after I finish paying you? Talking about, now, would you like to give us more money?

[B]

Bitch, as soon as that motherfucking degree's in the mail. It also comes accompanied with the alumni letter. And we all know what I'm talking about.

[A]

They're like, now keep paying us. We know you wanted to stop paying us, but we would love it if you was to continue to pay us.

[B]

Please. Nah, we'll take the please out.

[A]

So they said that they would look into it. Fast forward to a few weeks later. Phineas was still asking girls to look at their feet. And finally, he picked the wrong girl. He apparently was stalking a girl whose father was the head of security at the university to look at her feet. She tells her dad. Her dad realizes that he has spoken to me about the incident and launches a full investigation.

[B]

Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Hold up. Rewind. Her dad realizes he had spoke. So this is the same nigga that dismissed the shit out of her?

[A]

Yeah, dismissed Derica. But then when his own daughter pulled up, he was like, oh, actually, this is a problem.

[B]

Ah, how interesting. Oh, what a tangled web we weave.

[A]

And to all the men, listeners out there, and men identifying listeners, especially y'. All, Come on, stop waiting until you have daughters to be like, women is people. Women's women is people. People is women. That's how y' all sound. Exactly. Like what we just did. People is women.

[B]

A little two year old getting their first words in, right?

[A]

Women, women, women, people. Like a caveman.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

Women.

[B]

You know what? Oh, my God. That in and of itself just puts so. There's so many layers to this. Like, are you fucking kidding? So she been told you so. You're so. Talk about instant karma. Your daughter could have avoided this if you had done your fucking job, right?

[A]

If you just done your job, your daughter wouldn't have been getting stalked because y' all would have got rid of scientists.

[B]

Phineas Feets McGee, communications major, LLC.

[A]

Truly. Truly. So then of course, they launched this full investigation.

[B]

Always gotta be an investigation, right?

[A]

But I'm glad that it happened at least. So it was revealed that he had a document of over a hundred girls on campus examining their feet for a project that was verified did not exist. His punishment was a no contact order with all the girls involved that he asked to see their feet. So the rest of time in college, whenever I would see him, see, and this is the issue, why is he still there? Colleges. I'm so sick of y' all scamming asses. Look, you're already robbing us. The least you can do is keep the campus safe. And I'm sorry, the communication science feat major creep should have just been expelled permanently. Like, why? Why are y' all like, no, we'll let his creepy ass still keep going around. Now, he probably just out here popping up at the park. Toes ain't never safe around this.

[B]

Sounds Like a Rick James song. The communications science freak.

[A]

He's a communication science freak. Science freak. He won't show feet. Yeah. He takes pics of your feet. Yeah.

[B]

At the laundromat.

[A]

What's happening with this man? Yeah. So now it's like you can't even be out on the campus looking like one of them brochures where they sit in the grass and read they textbooks with your toes in the grass. Cause he probably still out here hiding in trees and shit, still trying to get his pics.

[B]

I just, you know, I want to say a shout out to Jerica for sharing this. Cause you know what? Fuck Finneas goddamn McGee. I can't believe that they allowed this motherfucker to stay on the campus. And that's how they end up getting these crazy ass lawsuits like down the line when 18 bitches start actually fucking talking to each other. And then motherfuckers know that, oh, this shit has been going on. I can't. How dare I hope that this school. I don't know. Has closed their doors. I don't know.

[A]

Right. I hope that this was ICDC college and it is shut down.

[B]

Come on now. Little Romeo's college deserves better credit than that.

[A]

Yeah, Little Romeo would have expelled Finneas.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

Himself, himself in the episode.

[B]

He would have literally grabbed him by the collar, grabbed him by the pants and yanked him out the door, threw him out.

[A]

Fresh Prince style.

[B]

Fresh Prince style.

[A]

Stop. Never to return. All right, Derricka, shout out to you. I'm glad that the situation didn't turn any uglier. I'm sorry that your university is assed. Because they are.

[B]

Honestly, I wish you had shot. I'm sure we're not allowed to, but I wish you had shouted out this fucking university so we could fucking like just call a out.

[A]

Right? But. Hey, but say but. But. Long story, short summary of that is, guys, all the things I'm gonna list here. Anybody who's giving you too much information up top, be weary. Anybody who's trying to make you empathize with them and you don't know them, be weary.

[B]

Walk away.

[A]

Anybody who's trying to pressure you into a situation and it's very intense, walk away. And I know it's hard because intense people know that they grab you. And most people are so polite that they're not going to like walk up to me.

[B]

It's another thing on the list.

[A]

You know how many intense conversations I've had with strangers that have walked up to me and just started going off and I'M just like, mm, mm. Especially in la. Who child? When I was going to the protest, like, you know, you out there with a lot of well meaning people who are educated and smart, but there's also some crazies.

[B]

I showed up, I met up with Lacey at a protest and I was like, lacey, who this man? Harper? I said, who this man? She was talking to some random ass man on the street. You can't help it, you know, like, you're human. And that goes to the item number, what are we on five now? Which is like, don't be fucking. Don't let your politeness, you know, and no, and this is not an attack, you know, like, if it happens, it happens to the best of us, motherfucker. But if.

[A]

And it's still not your fault.

[B]

It's not your fault and it will never be your fault. But if you have that moment, fucking seize that bitch. You know, like, don't let your politeness fucking, you know, put you in a. In a fucked up situation, basically.

[A]

Right? And also, just like we say, when scammers can give any excuse to pretty much, you know, cut a line or get what they want, you can do the same thing. You talking to a scammer. You want to get out of the situation. Hey, I'm sorry, I got to take this call. Your phone not ringing. It's about to, you know what I mean? Like any excuse and walk away.

[B]

Walk away. You don't even have to say. And that's the other thing too. You're not even obligated to say anything.

[A]

You just act like you don't hear.

[B]

Walk the fuck away. Literally.

[A]

You know how many times I've not had headphones in and people have been shouting at me on the street? And I just acted like I couldn't hear nothing. Just kept looking forward. Okay, it's sad that we live in this world, but this is for everyone. We're not just saying this to people who identify as women, but everyone. You know, you can always just pretend hear something.

[B]

Amen.

[A]

In conclusion, right here to go with moving on. We need a name for this scammer.

[B]

Oh, let's call him Loquacious.

[A]

Let's do a her. We've been giving it her.

[B]

Oh, I'm sorry. Let's call her Loquacious. Loquacious with an e at the end.

[A]

So Loquatius says that this reminded me of a scam that happened to my ex bff. Damn. Now why you have to put X in there? Like, what happened to y'?

[B]

All? I know that feeling. Girl, I do too. Don't feel judged.

[A]

You gotta get rid of these hoes sometimes. So she went to Times Square for a class assignment, and a man stopped her. The guy approached her, freaking out and said that he was a designer. Told her he was in town for New York's Fashion Week, and he didn't know anyone in the city. So this is a scam that on the main feed we talked about with Paul Scheer, that it happened to him personally. He said that he left with an important gown and a wallet in his cab, and he needed some money to call his boss. So my gullible ass friend gives this man $20 to help him. She felt so bad for him, she even offers to give him a hug and an extra 20 bucks. So the guy takes $40 and promises to give her money back. At this moment, she feels for whatever reason, that $40 is not enough. So she gives him her last $10. He gives her the $10 back and tells her 40 is enough. It took her, realized she was scammed. A week passed, and she was still waiting for her $40. So I think that this guy, the

[B]

scammer, felt bad mid scam.

[A]

And he's a popular scammer in New York. He was working for many years up and down the same neighborhoods. And we talked about this with Paul Scher, but we bring this one up as a listener letter just to say, like, I mean, obviously the scammer was like, damn, girl, I'm robbing you.

[B]

And you making it so uncomfortably easy. Take this $10 back.

[A]

She was like, do you want a hug, girl?

[B]

You. This is.

[A]

But when anybody comes up to you telling you an emotional story, like, you really have to watch out. I know that the human in us wants to help people. And I'm not going to say don't help people, because a lot of times people really do need help, and they're really in need. But there's also a lot of people who take advantage. This scam, to me in particular, is one that I think you don't need to feel. I kind of help out scammers on the street if they stop with a story, if I do have cash, simply because I'm gonna hope it's true. But even if it's not, I'm never gonna know.

[B]

And you know what? Clearly you needed this money. And it's like 10, 20, 30 bucks here, right?

[A]

There was a woman who was doing this on my campus. She said that her mother had a heart attack. Her car ran out of gas. She needed to pick up her daughter from daycare so that she could go pick up her mom. Too many details.

[B]

Too many bullet points.

[A]

Too many bullet points. And so. But she was working my college campus and getting paid, honey, because we were all going to our little bank accounts and getting out the little cash that we had to help her. And I don't feel angry with that woman. I don't think any of you guys should feel upset if you've been scammed by a shady person like that, because in this world, there are people who do need help, and we can't vet everybody. It's not like I can go up to a homeless people or a homeless person and be like, prove that you're homeless.

[B]

That's insane.

[A]

That's absolutely insane. I can't be.

[B]

Also, I feel like if you're at a point where you're willing to, like, stand on the side of a freeway, you know, or.

[A]

Right. You need the help.

[B]

Regardless, just take, like, regardless of your intentions and honestly think about it. If you. And, you know, take, you know, pick and choose. Feel shit. Feel the moment out. But if you, you know, count up as much money as you would give away at every corner over a year, I mean, it's really, like, chump change in the end. You know what I mean? Like, first of all, don't give people

[A]

your last 2020, right? If it's your last, you know, you know, maybe hold onto it for yourself, because I don't want you to be hurting. But at the same time, if you got it to spare, you know, we can't vet out who's a scammer and who's not. So I don't want you guys to

[B]

feel like if you're scamming for anything less than, like, honestly, $1,000. Well, I'll say 500. Like, take it. I'm just saying, like, those are, you know, not almost nominal amounts. You know what I'm saying?

[A]

Like, and we know that this sounds directly contradictory to the things that we just said to you about walk away and run, but please still do those things. That's what the show does. We're on both sides. We're pretty bipartisan when it comes to scammers.

[B]

We did a.

[A]

But the reason I'm saying this is that I don't want y'. Alls. I don't want yalls hearts to become hard, like, to people who might actually need help. But at the same time, I think what we were talking about before was if you feel uncomfortable, then that's a whole different thing.

[B]

100% but here's the thing. Cause, like, there is those moments that happen where you're like, but you can help somebody. And again, walk away, right?

[A]

Or just walk away.

[B]

Or just walk away.

[A]

Don't feel bad if you see them on the subway station and you overhear them telling the exact same story. Because if that's their profession, they need the money.

[B]

That's their profession. And you got a whole ass show, a performance that's a free performance you got, and you only paid $30 for it.

[A]

Cause Paul talks about this guy, Paul Shearer, and he said that the guy would cry too. So I'm like, that's gotta be exhausted. You crying all day. Like, that's some Meryl Streep level scamming. Like, you gotta strong tear ducts.

[B]

You gotta have, you know, I mean, so many things. You gotta have tissues.

[A]

And I mean, think about Broadway performance. Like, they might be doing a show and a matinee. This scammer is out here doing about 20 shows a day. That's a lot of performances.

[B]

And they work 12. They, like eight hours is. No, it's a 12 hour day easy.

[A]

Right? And they're probably getting way more than 20. You're absolutely right about that. So, you know, what you just got to see was live theater.

[B]

Okay? Live. You know, what do they call that? Art that's like in the moment that Shia LaBeouf does performance art. There we go.

[A]

Shia LaBeouf does that?

[B]

Hell yeah, he does. Yes, he does. Bitch. He had a whole. He had a whole thing where, like, I think you could go and, like, throw shit at him or some shit like that. What, in la? Yes, bitch.

[A]

Shy. Crazy.

[B]

No, it was. Yeah, he did. It was like a month long. Yeah, Google it. It was like a month long, like, performance.

[A]

You get to throw stuff at me.

[B]

It was like some bullshit like that, like, hurt me. Cause, you know, being a white man, a rich white man, is hard, you

[A]

know, he basically did bdsm, but called it performance art.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

He was like, whip me for my privilege.

[B]

Spank me. Literally.

[A]

But he called it art.

[B]

Shout out to Shia LaBeouf.

[A]

Right? A king. All right, guys, so I'm gonna call this person McGillicuddy.

[B]

McGillicuddy goes by his last name.

[A]

McGillicuddy says even though these stories both came from the same person, I'm still gonna call it a different name because I like confusion. I'm an agent of chaos. So McGillicuddy says, My other friend lost more money. She was walking on the platform on her way to work. She's a yogi, good vibes kind of person. So when a guy approached her asking for help, she thought helping him would bring her some good karma. That's the reason we all help people. And you can walk away even if you got scammed with feeling that good karma's coming your way.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

So she was trying to move out at the moment and was struggling to save money. So she wanted all the karma that she could get. The guy tells her that he can't cash his paycheck. Oh, no, wait.

[B]

Can I actually rewind a little bit before that? Look, karma don't work that way, baby girl. You can't intentionally set yourself up for some prepaid karma.

[A]

You can't.

[B]

You know?

[A]

I mean,

[B]

come on now. It was. Look, the first sentence he mentioned, karma, I let it fly. The second sentence, I let it fly three times in a row. Bitch. She was too focused on the wrong damn thing. Okay? Like, what the.

[A]

She was trying to build up her karma. She was trying. She was probably a little bit of scammer, too. She was trying to scam the universe. She was like, I'll do all this, and then the universe gonna hook me up.

[B]

And you can't scam the universe. Like, what the fuck? Like, she was. This was a little too specific. She was trying to move out at this moment and was struggling to save money. So she wanted the karma she could. Come on.

[A]

Also, if you gotta work this hard for karma, you must think you got some bad juju flying around you. Bitch.

[B]

I never worked so hard for karma in my life, and I think mine is pretty decent.

[A]

Right? I would say mine is too, but, yeah, if you gotta work this hard for a baby girl, there's something waiting on your soul.

[B]

You like?

[A]

I actually. Look, I burned down an orphanage, and now I'm George.

[B]

Is that your real name, bitch? You can tell us, right?

[A]

She's like, I pushed several grandmothers down flights of stairs, and now I really need the universe to turn around for me.

[B]

So I'm trying to get in as much good as I can.

[A]

Like, what does that mean? So of course he's doing the paycheck fraud scam that we've talked about so many times. Like, I can't cash my paycheck because I don't got a bank account. So he says, her dumbass goes to the bank with this guy and deposits a check. The bank has a policy of, you know, only giving half of the check instantly. Of course she's gonna get scanned out of the thousand dollars. We've seen this scam it's funny because I get this scam in the inbox a lot. And I don't always really read it because we've kind of gone over it before. But we get the scam a lot. Don't cash nobody's check for them. Don't cash nobody's check for them. Guys, one more time.

[B]

Do not cash nobody's God damn motherfucking check. You know what? There's so many Varia on this same core ass scam. That's how popular it is. Like, I mean, the Nigerian scam is just a variation of that. Like all the Swedish scam, the Israeli scam, I'm just calling out nationalities now. The South African scam, the Zulu scam, they have a specific one.

[A]

The Atlanta scams, which we now call Wakanda. Thanks to ti they have tons of scams in Atlanta. Everyone in Atlanta is driving around their mortgage. Mortgage. They're professional.

[B]

That was disrespectful. You better never move to Atlanta. Atlanta's coming for that ass. I didn't say it. Not Priscilla, you're right.

[A]

I'm personally very afraid of Atlanteans, so I'm gonna take that back.

[B]

They sound mythical.

[A]

Atlanteans are mythical. They are the most mythical of the black people in America.

[B]

They are.

[A]

They are. No one's more mythical than an Atlantean. They live a whole other life, and I love it. So she cashes this check and she gives the man the whole thousand dollars. That was all of her savings. The guy gives her his phone number. When they part ways a week later, the bank tanks back. Half that was savings.

[B]

Oh, you. I don't want to be mean.

[A]

She goes to the bank and they tell her that she cannot cash checks for someone else. She calls the guy and obviously it's the wrong number. She was in denial for another week, but until she came to terms with being scammed. So, yeah, that's another thing. You're not really actually supposed to deposit other people's checks into your bank account, guys. That's why you endorse it. That's why it's supposed to have your name on it. You're not supposed to do this at all. Also, I need to know what she did. Because you gave this man $1,000 up front. You don't know him.

[B]

Based on her theory, you are probably a murderer. Who did you kill?

[A]

That's what it is. She probably was out with, like, very. I know what you did last summer.

[B]

Driving real reckless. Like, driving real reckless.

[A]

You know, they were tipsy on the four Loco. And then, you know, they're laughing and having a good time.

[B]

And then it's the summer of their life.

[A]

They hit a old man on the sidewalk. And then they're like, we can't call the cops. We have a future. I'm moving to New York.

[B]

But he's breathing. And what do they do? Take a shovel and kill him. Make sure he's dead. But it's not their fault. He was already dying with breath.

[A]

They drug him into the lake and put rocks in his pockets, and everything

[B]

is normal for the next two and a half years. When they go off to their life in college. Happy times.

[A]

And her life in New York City, girl, she was like, I need better karma because I did a murder.

[B]

Like, the emphasis on her necessity for karma. Also, this is someone who he's. This person sent us two stories, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I don't remember hearing anything about karma in the previous story. So what that tells me is it was central to this tale. Yo, what's up?

[A]

There was nothing about karma in the other one. So this person is despo for good karma. And look, in New York, you do need good karma, because that's a city that will beat your ass all day. Shout out to New Yorkers, because all

[B]

day, y' all are living in a city all day as a. Oh, my goodness. I gotta breathe. Listen. I am a Jersey girl through and through. And I swore when I hit a certain age, I was like, I'm moving to the city. That is just where it's at. And then I hit a certain age, and I was like, I'll never survive there.

[A]

New York City is like, if. Take that and that and that. And that was a city like if you were watching a cartoon and it was like, bang, pow.

[B]

And the whole time that you're getting your ass beat, you're running late.

[A]

Literally, Batman, like, is. That's why he's in Gotham City. Because it's supposed to be New York City. Because he literally encapsulates what New York City is, which is a bunch of rich people beating the fuck out of you. And then being like, now tell me where I can find the perp. You get your ass beat every day that you wake up. And then they'd be like, and now you pay your rent, you gotta get on the train and have to deal with every crazy person on the train. But before you get on that bitch, you gotta pay your fare. That keeps going up, even though the train don't get any better.

[B]

Keeps going up. I remember when I first you Gotta

[A]

get kicked in the face by showtime.

[B]

Girl, girl, New York is a hard life. It's a tough life. It ain't for the weak minded or the weak spirited or the weak hearted. It's for the grit, the gritty.

[A]

New York City is as hard as Viola Davis walk. Oh, I heard that Viola Davis walk, like the ancestors is guiding her. That's awesome.

[B]

She really does. Every earthquake in LA recently can be traced back to her walk.

[A]

And we love Viola Davis. We love Viola Davis.

[B]

I'm talking to a goddamn queen. I need you to play my mom, my sister. I don't know. I don't know. I need it.

[A]

My auntie, anything, she's amazing.

[B]

Guidance, guidancer. What do you call your.

[A]

So shout out to you guys who live in New York City, please just try to do good things so that you don't have to try to create the environment for the universe to provide good things to you.

[B]

Okay, that's. That's a word. That's a word.

[A]

And guys, we've reached the end of the series. I hope that you guys enjoyed it. I hope that you, you learned something. Either better ways to scam or ways not to be scammed. Like we said, we're bipartisan here. We just don't want people to get hurt. We don't want innocent people to get hurt. Which I realize, you know, in scams, that's a lot of times collateral thefts.

[B]

It's very likely. It's very likely, but not always. That's what we call them here, collateral damage. We try to remove the humanness out of them.

[A]

Anyway, that's what companies do, that's what corporations do. It's all numbers and stats. Because then, you know, it's not face,

[B]

it's just dots and squares on a goddamn chart.

[A]

Ones and zeros, matrix. But no, obviously we are people. So we want you guys to take care of yourselves, take care of each other. You know, scam big, big capitalism all day long, scam the corporatocracy, but that don't scam innocent people. That's fucked. As always.

[B]

Unless they look rich,

[A]

if they have a monocle and a fur and a gold cane and a cigarette holder, then absolutely scam away. If they look like the Monopoly man who just got back from Rick Ross's

[B]

private yacht and is married to Cruella De Vil,

[A]

scam away. All right, guys, as always, if you want to reach us with your letters or your stories, scamgoddesspodmail.com you can find us at scamgoddesspod on all platforms. You can find me at D I V a L a C I Diva Lacey on all platforms.

[B]

And you can find me priscilladaviesactor PR I s C I l l a

[A]

D a V I E s at

[B]

door or Pris Davies. Because I like things to be challenging on Twitter. The first one was for IG shout out to I'm done.

[A]

All right, guys, stay scared.