John Gabris (2:56)

Yeah, it's my latest and greatest, and I don't know if I could top it. I'm fucking. The greatest scam of the century will be fighting back against a corporate merger and getting a second. But for now. For now, I'll take this as a huge victory, you know, like, that's the win right there, baby.

Lacey Mosley (3:11)

It really is. Cause you just have such a shining personality. You're so funny. I think that it's just like, yeah, give me a show where I can just be me and go out and explore fun places and be myself.

John Gabris (3:22)

Truly just physically difficult for, like, consumption purposes. But it's very easy for me to be drunk on camera and sort of charming. That's like, right in my fucking wheelhouse.

Lacey Mosley (3:33)

Well, you do drunk history, right?

John Gabris (3:34)

Yeah. I mean, my whole life I've been trying to monetize my hobbies.

Lacey Mosley (3:39)

It's like the Rocky thing, like, dun, dun, dun. But it's just like beer dancing. Yeah.

John Gabris (3:45)

Backstage at UCB in my 20s, then in my 30s on Drunk Yesterday, and then in my 40s traveling the country, fucking getting blasted on True TV. Yikes.

Lacey Mosley (3:55)

Yes. Listen, listen. It's funny. I was just in awe, and I commented on your Twitter, but I also was just in awe watching it. I was like, wow, we did it, Joe. We did it, Joe. You guys should check it out.

John Gabris (4:07)

Thank you. I do feel like that we did it. Like, holy shit, we did it.

Lacey Mosley (4:11)

Well, besides your most major scam at the moment, which is not a scam if you're watching. Okay. It's only a scam for a job because it's his job. Okay.

John Gabris (4:18)

Yeah. You get what you expect out of it. A funny travel show. I get way more. Like, I'm the one doing the scamming. They're not even spending that much money on me. I'm the only one who's pulling the. And it's only because I'm not memorizing lines or trying to fit into someone else's wardrobe choices. Like, so me. That's the scam. Is that victory right there. Just go and talk to a friend.

Lacey Mosley (4:39)

Because that's the biggest thing about acting is, like, I love doing it. But then they'd be like, all right, here's all the things you have to say and all the emotions you have to. And I mean, that's the fun. It's all fun. It's all fun part.

John Gabris (4:48)

But, like, it's so easy. We're not digging ditches. We're not fucking doing heart surgery. But the second they're like, hey, can you lean heavy on your left foot when you grab the papers with your right hand and make sure you kind of look. See, you're jumping the line here. So your eyeline has to be at this black X. And the next thing you know, you're like, I can't do all this. And then you're like, wait, it's just talking. I can do this. I can talk.

Lacey Mosley (5:08)

I can't read.

John Gabris (5:10)

Yeah, you fully lose all respect for yourself. You're like, what the fuck's going on here?

Lacey Mosley (5:15)

It's also not our fault, because on sets, they infantilize us. Because all of a sudden, you become this corporate meat puppet that's there for money, and I love it. I love being a corporate meat puppet for television networks.

John Gabris (5:26)

Yeah, you're the most expensive C stand on set.

Lacey Mosley (5:29)

Exactly. And then you walk around, you hear people in their walkie talkie. It's like, she's going to the bathroom. Or like, oh, she's in her chair. Like, they. You around and they monitor your every move.

John Gabris (5:37)

And, like, Lacy Mosley flying in, you know, you're like, okay, shut the fuck up. I'm coming. Like, I'll be there.

Lacey Mosley (5:43)

I. I've only had one moment where I was a little annoyed, and it was because, like, we were doing some scene. It was really stressful, and I needed to go to the bathroom and just, like, collect myself. And there was a PA following. Like, okay, she's going to want. She's walking, she's walking. I'm like, girl, I can hear you. Like, please. And then she waited by the bathroom. I was like, I've only been here seven minutes. Like, please, I'm coming out. Like, I. I was like, girl, I had to poop. Like, what are we doing?

John Gabris (6:04)

Yeah, well, that's always the thing. Like, you hear, like, a radio. He's been in the bathroom for a while. It's like, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo. Like, we don't even have to air my fucking business here, dude.

Lacey Mosley (6:13)

Standing next to the stall like, I'm the president. Like, come on now. But we love our jobs. We're not complaining about our jobs. We love our jobs.

John Gabris (6:21)

No, please.

Lacey Mosley (6:21)

I would love more, but I would Love. So many more jobs, please. But what is your relationship with scams now? It's been a few years since you've been on the pod. Have you ran any other than your biggest grift right now? But, like, have any happened to you? Anyone you know or anything? It could be anything.

John Gabris (6:36)

I have not been caught up in any scams recently, but I'm very much a scam fan, if you will. You know, a member of the congregation for sure. But also, I've always found scams and grifts so interesting. And maybe I grew up, like, watching mafia movies and watching action movies and thrillers where there's always some deceit going on. So that shit has always appealed to me. And nowadays, like, and partially cause of your podcast, partially because of the way the world turns and the direction that society's going to. I feel like we're just combating scams in every fucking breath of my day. I'm getting a text that says my Netflix account is in jeopardy from a fucking. I'm getting an email that says this. I'm getting emails from my dead dad's email address that, like, you know, my mom's getting emails from Amazon without. It's so fucking twisted, man, the way they could get. My mom got an email from Amazon without an O in it, and she was like, they're shutting down my account. I have to log in and give them my credit card. I was like, mom, no, no, like. And that shit is just happening on a scale. Like an exponential scale. Unbeknownst to us, everybody's grandma is getting fucking grifted right now. And it's sad. It's desperate.

Lacey Mosley (7:52)

We say, call your grandmas, call your older loved ones. If you want them to leave you anything when they pass away, you better call them. Otherwise they gonna give it to Jane Doe and spam likely and all them motherfuckers. Cause they're calling every day. Nobody calls her grandmother more than scam likely. Like, okay, they checking in on me mob every day. It's wild. But you're right. We're now fighting them on every level. And then we're also kind of getting involved because we realize everything is a scam. But then also at every single turn, guys, read those emails. Read them and make sure that the link is what it is supposed to be. Because Amazon without an O is pretty genius.

John Gabris (8:26)

If you live in this current world, someone knocks on your door, it's 95% likely it's a fucking scam and 5% likely someone you know, like back in the day like, ooh, I wonder who's at the door. Like, fucking Mr. Rogers, Pee Wee's Playhouse. Like, I wonder who's at the door. Oh, it's two people requesting money for nurse salaries, but really it fucks over the nurses in the long run. Like, oh, my God. Like, what is. Wait, it's accidentally a Rick Caruso fucking petition or some shit. Fuck out of my yard.

Lacey Mosley (8:57)

You know, the wildest thing to me is I was playing this little game. Look, you know how they have like, garden scapes or like a little candy crush or whatever. I was playing this game called Woodoku. It's like Sudoku, but with wood. I'm very bad at it, but I love playing it to, like, relax my brain. I don't buy it with the ads or like, I didn't buy it with the extra stuff. So it has ads in between the games that I'm playing. I don't care. Why did a Rick Caruso ad pop up on my little game?

John Gabris (9:22)

I was like, oh, he's aiming for the fucking. Like, because that's the advertising he wants to do. My. My fucking mailbox every day has got fucking Rick Caruso lamination. I mean, not anymore, but for like a month, right?

Lacey Mosley (9:35)

Which makes no sense. Like, he spent so much money and he lost. That's like my favorite thing about him losing. Other than him Los is like, how much? $100 million to lose. Like this.

John Gabris (9:43)

I forgot who said it. I'm quoting a random tweet or meme that said, like, rick Caruso spent $100 million to get everyone to hate Katy Perry.

Lacey Mosley (9:52)

Indeed.

John Gabris (9:53)

And it worked. Yeah.

Lacey Mosley (9:54)

What was that? What if that was a ploy all along the long game.

John Gabris (9:58)

If my man built. If he spent $100 million to break ground on the Rick Caruso for mayor low income housing building somewhere in LA. If he spent $100 million on that, he would have gotten elected.

Lacey Mosley (10:13)

He would have.

John Gabris (10:14)

That would have been more marketing than any amount of ads. Any amount of ads during the Dodgers, any amount of Karen Bass attack ads, any amount of flyers, any amount of fucking Wudoku fucking pop ups. Like, he could have won the fucking election if he just built low income housing. Like, if he just.

Lacey Mosley (10:32)

He was like, I'm gonna do something about the homeless. And I guess it was just that he was gonna use the state. But that's how we figured it out, because we were like, what do you mean? Go do something about him when you could literally do something about it right now. And also him spending that much money to gain political power. It Just jumped out as like, bro, we know you about to do evil with this. Like, nobody's spending $100 million because they care about people, right?

John Gabris (10:55)

Well, no one's spending $100 million on themselves if they care about people, because you can buy stuff that helps people with the $100 million.

Lacey Mosley (11:01)

He's like, no, no, no, no, listen, listen. You're not seeing the vision. He had $100 million to help people right now. But if I get into office, then I can help people in perpetuity, heretofore.

John Gabris (11:12)

With and get myself $110 million back. And like, that's the fucking rub, man. That politics, biggest scam of all, obviously, but that buying of fucking, like, that's happening on a lot of levels. And then that shit happening here that nakedly, in a town that we all swear we're fucking. I mean, limousine liberals, but everyone swears they're a fucking liberal in la. And all of a sudden everyone to fucking bat for Rick Caruso. And it's like, wait, all these conversations that we've had in the last five years, we have a black woman up against a white man, A guy who's. And I'm hearing liberals go like, look, he's a land developer. He knows what this. And I'm like, this is what we made fun of our uncles for about Trump, motherfucker. It's the same exact quote as you.

Lacey Mosley (11:57)

Get older, we lose the. I mean, I'm in the nihilist phase. I'm like, I'm just trying to live as long as they gonna let me. Cause soon the air won't be free. So.

John Gabris (12:06)

But there's like, he spends $100 million and what was he going to do if he got into power? Raise the budget of the LAPD? Fucking donate 10 million to the LAPD, motherfucker. If you're so like, if that's your.

Lacey Mosley (12:18)

Fucking move and they'll give you a sticker, they'll give you a little card that you can present when you get pulled over. Like, you could have just circumvented all of this. But also, I just thought it was so funny that it popped up in this in app game that I'm playing. Because, like, where else were the ads popping up? Like Instagram, like leggings. And then it's like also Wolf of rigor, Russo, but also bodies, legs.

John Gabris (12:36)

Yeah. I mean, he was scraping the fucking barrel. He's like, I wanna like pop up ads. Is like, you should be humiliated. It's like Jon Hamm doing H and R Block. You should feel bad a little like, let that happen for those smaller business. Let lesser actors book these commercials, guys.

Lacey Mosley (12:51)

Right? He had the ads that would come up like, you know, when you look at a TMZ article and at the bottom it'd be like six ways to know that you probably have restless leg syndrome. And then it's like, vote for Rick Caruso.

John Gabris (13:01)

This like, this actor is fatter now than you ever remembered. Vote for Rick Car. Look at these.

Lacey Mosley (13:08)

If you looking for milfs near you, vote for Rick Caruso.

John Gabris (13:12)

Why are you buying milfs in your area are voting for Rick Caruso. What? Try not to come.

Lacey Mosley (13:18)

Yeah, try not to come when you're voting for Rick Caruso. Oh, no, no. That was the funniest part about it. But we're gonna take a quick break for some non scam advertisements. We'll be right back with what's hot and fried scams. And we're back. And it's time for what? Time and fraud. This is where we warn our listeners about scams that are popping in the streets more often than not these days. We get a letter from you guys. As always, snitch on your friends, your family and your enemies@scamgodesspodmail.com. just make sure this scam is retired so we don't. What? Yes, Fuck up your bag. This. Okay, so gamers, this person, this woman has identified herself as a woman. So I'll take a female. I mean, any name could be any name, but like, you know, okay, yeah.

John Gabris (14:06)

I'll go with Melina.

Lacey Mosley (14:09)

Melina. Oh, I love that name. That's a pretty name, Melina. So Melina says, hi there. Love you. Love the show. You got that out real quick. You know how we go? Melina says, I am a priest at a church in parentheses, yes, I am a woman who is at an Episcopal church. So fairly, there's not many women priests. So that's, that's, you know, rare. There probably should be more, but.

John Gabris (14:34)

Well, yeah, we should add any place where it's all dudes. We should just add women for like, safety purposes. Not for their. Unfortunately, not for the women's safety, but for like the safety of society in general. Let's throw a few female priests, a few female football coaches.

Lacey Mosley (14:48)

You should just never have a bunch of dudes in one room making all the decisions.

John Gabris (14:52)

Like the army, sports, the Catholic church. Anytime it's all dudes, shit gets a little twisted.

Lacey Mosley (15:01)

Anyway, so fairly often we get messages about free pianos. Usually someone's parent passes away and they have a clean. They Clean out the house. People do not want to keep the pianos or they're too expensive to move, so they offer the instruments to us. It's cheaper to buy a new piano than move an old one. She puts in parentheses. It's not strange to get a message like this. So this gives me, like, not a mega church. And y'all know how I feel about mega churches and about a lot of churches, that they can be a grift. You know what I mean? Like, church is supposed to be tax, so they helping the community and whatnot. And they be helping themselves to, like, fly in drummers and fucking light shows and shit. They're like, no, no. They. We need this to recruit more people to God. Y'all fire them amps up.

John Gabris (15:43)

Well, yeah, there's a fucking world that crosses all boundaries. You know what I mean? Like, every. Like, eventually you get to some level where you're like, wait, what do you need this million dollar church for? To make sure you save more of us. Like, the second you got, like. Like, the Catholic Church is the number one owner of real estate in Manhattan. In New York City, one of the biggest real estate places in the world is New York City. And the Catholic Church is the biggest land right ahead of nyu and who owns more property? And NYU at least pays taxes. Fucking. The Catholic Church does not.

Lacey Mosley (16:21)

They need that for Jesus, John.

John Gabris (16:24)

Jesus does not need fucking square footage in the fucking. In the West Village.

Lacey Mosley (16:28)

He said multiply. He said be fruitful and multiply. So they multiplying, you know, their acreages. You see it. You see it. But, you know, I will say that this seems like a smaller church, and I used to go to smaller church, and, like, they tend to be less scammy. So, you know, I'm not gonna shade Melina because she wrote it a letter. So, Melina, we're not shading you. Were your church shout out to you for being a girl boss. So one day, Melina says my organist gets an email about a free piano. Not only a piano, but a Steinway grand piano. Those are like the. Like the Lamborghini. Yeah, Lamborghini piano. We both went in the same place. I love it. So this is a nice one. So I told him to look into it. She was like, oh, wait a minute now. Amen.

John Gabris (17:11)

A word of Steinway. Get over there.

Lacey Mosley (17:13)

That sounds like a blessing to me. Go ahead and see. Look into that. So a few weeks pass, and my organist comes to me all happy that we're getting this great piano for free. We just have to pay to ship it from Indiana. We're on Long Island, New York. Oh, that's your stomping grounds.

John Gabris (17:27)

Oh, wow. Okay.

Lacey Mosley (17:30)

You might have been here. You might know Melina. I said, oh, that's a scam. And he was confused. I explained that if it's not a local person, this is a total scam. He, being the sweet man that he is, insisted that this was real. And he said, how is a free piano a scam? See, that's why you need women in all the businesses. Because he was like, let's get it. Like, free piano. Coming from Indiana, this all makes sense to me.

John Gabris (17:55)

No such thing as a free lunch. I mean, that's like scam rule number one. The second you're getting some shit for free or someone's going out of their way to do something, something's up. Something's up. You gotta. Your hackle's gotta go up.

Lacey Mosley (18:05)

Look around, check the email, make sure there's an O in Amazon, because you're probably getting scammed so. Well, he told me that we just have to pay $300 in freight and $900 for insurance and that we'll get reimbursed. And he already paid it on his personal credit card. This is the pianist.

John Gabris (18:24)

Oh.

Lacey Mosley (18:27)

He said the woman, whom he only talked to via email, sent him a link to a freight company website and he paid them directly, and they even gave him a tracking number. And I said, okay, scam.

John Gabris (18:40)

Yes. Luckily, fucking Melina's a listener of this podcast. Fucking sniff that shit out.

Lacey Mosley (18:46)

God be talking to Melina, okay? I'm in the priesthood for a reason, okay? Because I have a direct line.

John Gabris (18:51)

She's got dual citizenship in two different congregations.

Lacey Mosley (18:55)

Amen. Okay? Whereas the organist is clearly missing God's phone calls and the text, never opening the letters.

John Gabris (19:02)

No, you gotta get off Cricket Wireless if you wanna hear from God. You gotta get off on God. You gotta get on that 5G plus.

Lacey Mosley (19:08)

Get off boost Mobile. God is not calling. Nobody there. Okay? So a few weeks later, no piano arrived. He called the freight company in quotes, and the phone was disconnected. My organist emailed the woman, and she said that the piano was stuck in customs in Indiana. Question mark, question mark, question mark.

John Gabris (19:28)

Interstate customs. That's not a thing.

Lacey Mosley (19:30)

Never heard of those. Never heard of her. This is the scammer saying that, but if we're patient, her mother's gold bars are hidden inside the piano and we can keep them.

John Gabris (19:42)

Whoa.

Lacey Mosley (19:42)

And she said that it was her mother who passed away and that was the impetus for her donating the Steinway to The church. So now she's saying, if y'all wait until they get out of Wisconsin customs, It's gold bricks in there that I didn't want.

John Gabris (19:53)

I know it feels weird that I'm just telling you this right at the tail end of this entire piano interaction, but just trust me. Hold out. You'll get the gold bars, and the piano feels like a fucking infomercial. And if you order now, you'll get the gold bars and the piano and the $1,200 freight reimbursement for only 49.95.

Lacey Mosley (20:12)

Right. A week, a year, in perpetuity. Like, what? So now Malibu says this is her now? I didn't say I told you so in quotes, because as a priest, I'm supposed to be kind. I love you. Like, I'm petty as hell, but, you know, that's hell and I'm working.

John Gabris (20:29)

I guess I'm a priest. Fine. I'm a priest.

Lacey Mosley (20:32)

I'll be chill. God don't want us to be petty.

John Gabris (20:34)

I wanted to light his ass up, but, you know, I'm a priest, so I had to be all nice and helpful.

Lacey Mosley (20:39)

I'm employed for the Lord, and he talking about forgiveness and whatnot. That's a company policy. So, you know, I did say I told you so.

John Gabris (20:47)

The company manual has 10 rules.

Lacey Mosley (20:49)

Yeah. Gotta follow him. So in the end, no piano arrived. My organist filed a police report and got his bank to reimburse him. And in the end, he learned some valuable lessons. Lessons. Number one, listen to me. Number two, free is never free. Oh, come on, Mother Molina. I love the number one first commandment. Listen to me.

John Gabris (21:13)

Yeah, I mean, that's like. That is low key what religion is all about. It's like, yes, these are ways to live your life. But more importantly, if I change my mind at any point, play along. All right, this is what we doing.

Lacey Mosley (21:25)

But I don't want to say, because I know this is your life's work, so I'm not trying to change you too much. Molina, thank you for writing into the podcast. I will say, like, I'm glad he got his money back and everything, but she did tell him that this was a scam and he followed through anyway. Which, like, okay, yeah, God is the CEO of the church, but, like, there's other people who have higher positions underneath. I would think priest is one. Organist definitely isn't higher than priest.

John Gabris (21:51)

Well, I would also throw it out there. Like, maybe just general advice for your listeners, who I think are a little more hip to this. But this organist doesn't sound to be, yo. Never use your personal credit card at work. Shit, ever, ever. No matter what, no matter how badly you want those sky miles or whatever, just don't even fucking bother. Just let it rip. Ask, ask the fucking pastor for his credit card. Ask the number, the heads up guy. Never. Oh well, for work I'll just throw my own credit. Oh, I'll just throw down for work drinks and then get reimbursed. You know, companies fall apart, they take forever to reimburse you. Don't you have to be confident in like if it's a new freight company from fucking Wisconsin, get your fucking numbers off of that, right?

Lacey Mosley (22:37)

And I threw Wisconsin there. It was from Indiana. But I will say to your point, also, companies, they want their work because that's like our money to them. It's like our currency is the work that we do. And they want it on time. They'll dock you if you're late. They want it. You know, you can't be like, hey, it's gonna take three to five business days for me to show up to work. Even though they want to pay you like that. So you can never trust that the company is gonna pay you on time or if ever, right?

John Gabris (23:01)

Yeah, fuck. You can't trust. They have no reason, you have no reason to trust them.

Lacey Mosley (23:07)

And also why you brought up a good point too with the sky miles. Cause now I'm thinking like, why was he so excited to pay his own money for a piano that wasn't even gonna go in his house?

John Gabris (23:15)

And I know the reimbursement shit is like, oh, if I could put $5,000 on my credit card, get those miles, then get $5,000 from work and reimburse it, that's free miles for me. But if that reimbursement check is giving capital one, yeah, that shit comes one month late. You're fucking carrying a balance. You're getting fucked. You're reaching into your savings. You gotta be careful out there, kids.

Lacey Mosley (23:35)

Interest going up on a Tuesday.

John Gabris (23:38)

No, the interest going up, inflation going up on a Tuesday.

Lacey Mosley (23:43)

Literally any day they want, they're just making it up.

John Gabris (23:45)

They just choose.

Lacey Mosley (23:46)

Yeah, mother Melina, you were in the right. And hopefully this is a lesson to him. And hopefully the organist will share his story with other people so they will be listening to you and not giving up their own coins for what is clearly robbery. He thought, oh, they have a website, girl, you can get those anywhere. It's called godaddy. Anybody can have a website with credit card information these days.

John Gabris (24:07)

Gold bars, you Say, okay, here's my credit card number again.

Lacey Mosley (24:11)

She's like, but if you want the gold bars, you actually need to send a little bit more money in your name.

John Gabris (24:15)

Yeah, act normal, right? Yeah, act normal if you want them gold bars. Chill, they're coming.

Lacey Mosley (24:20)

He's like, I can keep the gold bars for me. I don't have to get those to the church. Gold bars is also goofy as hell. Like she could come up with like, oh, it's got a really nice hand carved bench that comes with it or something.

John Gabris (24:31)

Yeah. It just makes no sense that you would find out about the gold bars after the fact. That like feels like when you're like a little kid, you're like, and there's gold bars inside of it. Like, and I'm bulletproof and, and I can fly, you know, like, it just feels like little kid shit. It's like I already had me at like Steinway, you know, like, exactly.

Lacey Mosley (24:50)

What kind of pirate shit is this? Now I'm getting doubloons. Like, come on now.

John Gabris (24:57)

Chock full of doubloons. Customs has stopped the organ. They've realized it's chock full of doubloons.

Lacey Mosley (25:05)

You know, Indiana customs, you know how they do international. Oh, goodness. Well, we're gonna take a quick break for some non scam advertisements. We'll be right back with Historic Hoodwinks, robbery and fraud. And we are back. It's time for my favorite segment, Historic Hoodwinks. This is where I will regale John with a famous concept or group of criminals. We'll see if we like them or if we hate them. I'm gonna note up top because we don't scam journalists. Most of the research for the story was drawn from Courtney Shea, Toronto's Life article, the Yorkville Swindler, How Albert Allen Rosenberg scammed his way into high society. Content warning, there's a brief mention of domestic violence. Putting that up top. So thank you so much, Courtney. And we will link her article in the footnotes if you want to do a deeper dive on this. So we're talking about Alan Rosenberg. He was the picture of charming, uber wealthy European businessman looking for a new wife. The multilingual multi heir to the oval teen fortune charmed women across Europe and Canada. But the problem was no one ever knew what was real. Okay, he's giving ogle team.

John Gabris (26:17)

He has like, I have money. I'm an older guy look like that is just a classic. Bald tan head says, yeah, I have money.

Lacey Mosley (26:26)

I'll fly you out. You can get flew out. We Going to the Caymans.

John Gabris (26:29)

Yeah. He's like, no PJ for you, but I could fly you first. See you there.

Lacey Mosley (26:34)

Exactly. Like, he's got the heavy Amex.

John Gabris (26:36)

Yeah. He's not Nesquik, he's Ovaltine. So he can't do PJs, but he can get you in first on JetBlue. He gets you in middle.

Lacey Mosley (26:44)

Yeah, you're definitely gonna get extended leg room with Mr. Ogletine. Okay? You don't gotta worry about that, sweetheart. You don't gotta worry about that. We board in first with the veterans, okay?

John Gabris (26:53)

Extra leg room. If you're flying me out, you best get me extra legroom. Getting all these tall baddies float out.

Lacey Mosley (27:03)

Listen, but it is giving. Like if I saw him in a restaurant, I would think he's almost giving. Like, I'm rich, but I don't want you to know. I'm rich, but also I dress like a rich.

John Gabris (27:12)

Well, this is like that level of rich that is really apparent even among some of my peers now, where it's just like, oh, I'm just a sneaker, jeans and T shirt guy. And then it's like the most expensive jeans, the most expensive sneakers and the most expensive T shirt.

Lacey Mosley (27:25)

Silicon Valley.

John Gabris (27:26)

Yeah, it's that Silicon Valley. Like this guy's got like thousand dollar sunglasses on, but he's got like, you know what I mean? He's like, I'm just a normal, ah, me. He looks like the type of guy you'd see at a restaurant. He'd be dining with a 28 year old girl and you're like, like, I don't know if he's fucking her or her guardianship, right?

Lacey Mosley (27:44)

Is it her daughter? Are they dating? Questions, we don't know the answer.

John Gabris (27:48)

Daddy or dating.

Lacey Mosley (27:49)

Daddy or dating. It can also be mommy or matrimony. Okay? Like we equal opportunity.

John Gabris (27:54)

Two way street. Yeah. Eoe, baby.

Lacey Mosley (27:56)

For the sugar. The sugar theys the sugar thems the sugar poppies. The sugar mommies. It's definitely giving all of the sugar. So. Though details of Albert Allen Rosenberg's background change with each retelling, the standard version of of his story is that he was born in Cairo. His father, Alvin, was a Canadian international lawyer stationed in Egypt in the early 1940s while working for the UN. Okay, we got some political clout, we got some coins coming in. His mother was Marcel, a woman born in France and raised in Switzerland, where she met Alvin.

John Gabris (28:28)

This reeks of like true, straight up old school. Like this is how you design a rich dick. It's like My mother was raised in Switzerland. My father, you know what I mean? Like, everything is just established to be like, yes, and I'm the villain in a Marvel movie.

Lacey Mosley (28:43)

And the more European you can get with it. Like, oh, we summered in Holland and we falled in France. It's giving wealthy.

John Gabris (28:52)

And then all of a sudden, I don't know what this is. It starts to feel racist to me. I mean, I know I'm like the white straight man here, but it starts to feel racist.

Lacey Mosley (29:00)

We hope you could see racism. We would like that. Yes.

John Gabris (29:02)

Yeah. It's like, oh, I'm going to Switzerland. I've learned I'm living in Switzerland. Even just choosing that is like, there's so many places you could live. What do we know about Switz the.

Lacey Mosley (29:11)

Most, other than banks?

John Gabris (29:14)

Oh, oh, there you go. Another. We got to go where the banks are fucking unregulated and the people are white, you know, get the fuck out of here.

Lacey Mosley (29:21)

So they returned to Switzerland before Albert was 1 years old. And he enjoyed a very privileged childhood in the lakeside town of Kuznacht. I love that he's in a lakeside town having a, you know, next to water lifestyle. The family relocated to Canada in the 1960s where his mother opened a shop called La Belle Boutique in Yorkville, Toronto. Okay, La Belle Boutique. That's fancy. I'm gonna go in there. What y'all got? Scarves?

John Gabris (29:48)

Uh oh. Yorkville, Toronto. This is the Yorkville scammer, right? So we're about to get to the hometown of the fucking scam itself.

Lacey Mosley (29:56)

Yep.

John Gabris (29:57)

I was paying attention.

Lacey Mosley (29:58)

Look at you. We love that for us. In 1986, a Canadian national paper, the Globe and Mail, ran a profile on Marcel as her boutique had become a favorite destination for Toronto wealthiest lady. So she had all the bad bitches with the money to spend and their husbands were nowhere in sight. So they were just running it up.

John Gabris (30:17)

That's perfect. That's a target rich environment for scams. Like rich women with extra money. Like a dude looks at that and is like, okay, I know how to get. I got to get their bags next.

Lacey Mosley (30:27)

Yes. So this is the mob, right?

John Gabris (30:29)

Oh, shit. Yeah, she's setting them up.

Lacey Mosley (30:32)

The profile mentioned only that her husband was a jeweler in Cairo, not a fancy Canadian lawyer. So they. They cleaned it up. It's like, oh, he's just a jeweler. I'm a woman who loves fashion and totally normal.

John Gabris (30:45)

And you just were normal people. Don't worry.

Lacey Mosley (30:48)

Everyday people. Okay. Y'all heard that John Legend song, Ordinary People. He wrote it about us. Okay? We don't know which way to go, but come in the store. That's where you should go.

John Gabris (30:58)

That's the important part.

Lacey Mosley (30:59)

So according to Marcel, her family had fled Egypt following the overthrow of king Farouk in 1952 and moved to France, then Montreal with no mention of Switzerland. So now she's really trying to give, like regular Degla. She was like, we ran because of the political, you know, strife, and now we're just having a homely business over here and nobody's a lawyer and nobody worked for the un and yeah, kind.

John Gabris (31:23)

Of like how in comedy now everyone's like, okay, how do I make it seem like I didn't come from privilege? Everyone's always like, well, you know my hat. Venezuelan grandmother always said, you know, you're like, okay, okay.

Lacey Mosley (31:39)

Uber. I've only taken Uber pools because I'm a cooler. They don't even do those anymore. How are you still taking those? Don't worry about it.

John Gabris (31:47)

We grew up taking Uber pool in my family. That's how we. Oh, okay.

Lacey Mosley (31:51)

Everyday working man. No one went to Harvard. My parents didn't fund my comedy career. Please stop.

John Gabris (31:57)

I just went to Boston for school. Ask, no follow ups.

Lacey Mosley (32:01)

A Boston school with Bostons, and I was just like them. So Albert often also claimed he studied computer science at the University of Toronto and received an MBA from Harvard. However, University of Toronto, I'm gonna say, like, the Canadians. Toronto.

John Gabris (32:17)

What? Do you realize we went to college being like, you gotta have real shit on your resume if you wanna try to get a job and you're spending 100 grand to go to some fucking college. Meanwhile, people like Elon Musk and other rich people are like, ah, just say I went to fucking hard. Like, why didn't I just say I went there?

Lacey Mosley (32:33)

Like, who was gonna check? They're not gonna check until you're doing a shit job. So if you can manage to make it up as you go. No one looks. No one ever. I don't even have my diploma. I don't know where it is. Maybe my mom has it. I don't have a physical copy of it or even a photo of it.

John Gabris (32:47)

Same dog. Same dog.

Lacey Mosley (32:48)

Why did I pay for that piece of paper? I could have just lied. Why? We could have went anywhere. We could have been.

John Gabris (32:56)

Yeah, Best week. Like, best week. My first job as a PA on Best week Ever is going to, like, fact check my resume that hard and be like, actually, he didn't grad. You know, I should have just fucking lied, doc. I could be and why not now? Yeah, I went to. I graduated college in 04. I'm so old, there's no way you could track down where I went. I might as well say, you know, I'll just start saying wherever. Yeah, I was. I studied at the sore bones. Right.

Lacey Mosley (33:19)

Cause do they have to keep it like dental records? Like, maybe they don't even know anymore. Also, like, if somebody asked me to describe going to school there, I'd be like, you know, we would be out on the lawn, me, an Asian kid, a white woman and a teacher.

John Gabris (33:33)

Just describe a brochure. Yeah. Underneath a tree with a tipped over bike and some open books, drinking iced teas, you know, as college kids do.

Lacey Mosley (33:43)

We love going to the bonfire.

John Gabris (33:46)

Yes. Oh, my roommate, she was crazy, but we got along. We stayed in touch for a while, but we don't anymore. Oh, okay.

Lacey Mosley (33:56)

Just the vaguest descriptions of college.

John Gabris (33:58)

Yup.

Lacey Mosley (33:59)

My meal plan, nasty. Sometimes good. Other times, like Thanksgiving week, just no detail. So. However, the University of Toronto didn't have an undergraduate undergrad computer science program until the 1970s. So he lied about a place that didn't even have the program. They looked in the brochure and were like, they don't gotta be Maddie's, like, this isn't even here. Many years after when Albert would have attended. So he was saying that he got a computer science degree from a place that didn't even offer computer science until long after he said he graduated. And Harvard had no record of him being a student. Now I feel like Harvard is petty. They're like, the girls love to lie on us, so we keep the record.

John Gabris (34:39)

Yeah, Harvard has to because people are paying 100. You know, people's parents are paying an inordinate money to get their kid a Harvard diploma. If that starts getting scammed, you know. You know, they have like a fraud detection department at Harvard. Just fucking rich guys and cable knit sweaters being like, bro, fuck, dude, they want to fucking say they went to fucking Harvard. It's like, call this fucking Toronto dude bro, and fucking cancel him, dawg.

Lacey Mosley (35:04)

Right? Unless he wants to donate.

John Gabris (35:06)

Yeah, unless he wants to be a fucking Ovaltine computer lab. Then he can do whatever the fuck he wants.

Lacey Mosley (35:12)

Right? Then we'll be like, mm, mm, bitch. We love Ovaltine at Harvard. He was our favorite dude when he was over here.

John Gabris (35:16)

Oh, it's just like chocolate milk, but with a vitamin or two. Yum. Thank you. Ovaltine.

Lacey Mosley (35:22)

It's milk with powder in it. We love powdered milk at Harvard. Yes. So Karen Rosenberg, me wander in the early 1970s, Albert Moore moved back to Switzerland, where he met and married Karen Wander, an actual descendant of the overtine Wander empire. So he went and, like, made his whole lie legit because he married someone who is a part of the chocolate milk dynasty.

John Gabris (35:50)

So smart. Finally fucking start. Like, oh, shit. This is a perfect opportunity for my lies to become true.

Lacey Mosley (35:55)

I wonder how he tracked her down. So together they had three daughters, he got her pregnant and everything you got to.

John Gabris (36:02)

You got to lock them in, get him trapped in there.

Lacey Mosley (36:04)

Mary Claire, Sabine, and Penelope. And gave them rich people's names, too. Sabine is the richest name I've ever heard.

John Gabris (36:13)

Yeah, for real. I mean, if a woman named Sabine entered a room and was like, I'm sorry, are you John Gabris? Yes. Here is a knife. Cut your throat, please. I'd be like, you got it, Sabine. You seem to be in charge. Your name is in charge, right?

Lacey Mosley (36:24)

It's for the greater good, I'm guessing.

John Gabris (36:26)

Yeah, sure, whatever you say, babe. I got you, Sabine.

Lacey Mosley (36:29)

I'm just honored you said my name, Sabine. Okay, tell my story, Sabine, Please.

John Gabris (36:35)

I love you, Sabine.

Lacey Mosley (36:38)

So the family lived in Zurich, where Albert claimed to establish a public trust with his wife and her large, very wealthy family. It's unclear, but unlikely that he did so. Later, Al would frequently use the trust as a source of collateral for his schemes. And on other occasions, he would say it was over 100 years. So sometimes he'd be like, oh, yeah, I made this trust from my Ovaltein money. And other times he'd be like, this Ovaltein trust has been here for generations.

John Gabris (37:07)

Scammers gonna scam, dog. That's the thing that drives me fucking crazy is like, he locked himself into a good scam. He got access to a fucking fortune, but that's just not enough. You gotta start using that to keep more plates spinning. Like, look, I'm a gambler. I'm addicted to gambling. I know that. And I can tell when I'm in a situation where I'm like, okay, you actually, like, won a little. Let's relax. It's like, no, now I should go and gamble harder. Like, all scammers are like, shit, I can't believe we got away with that. Well, let's do it again, but bigger and better this time. Now we have the funding to go for the big scam. You know, you're like, no, just stop.

Lacey Mosley (37:45)

Just be happy that you married a rich woman and had three fancy sounding children and you live in. Come on now. So in 1981, Albert moved back to Toronto with Karen. And registered a company called Command and Control Systems. Wow, Sounds legit.

John Gabris (38:01)

No, thank you. Sounds either like a fucking video game. Actually, Command and Conquer was a video game I played a lot of. But also it sounds like a fucking 50 shades of gray knockoff book or some shit.

Lacey Mosley (38:12)

He's the CEO of Command and Control. We can't mess with him. They command over there and also Control.

John Gabris (38:19)

We should have them commanding and controlling. We need to silo it hard.

Lacey Mosley (38:23)

He should have added one more for just fun. Command. Control. Wealthy.

John Gabris (38:27)

Yeah, Command and Control. And come. Wait, what's the last part? Nothing. Let's go.

Lacey Mosley (38:32)

Don't worry about that. Don't worry about that. You heard the first two, you know it's legit. Six years later, it was dissolved by the federal government for failure to file documentation. The couple also opened a gallery called Rosenberg Fine Art, which specialized in investment art. Investment art is designed to be bought and sold as another type of asset building, such as gold.

John Gabris (38:51)

That drives me fucking crazy. Like, if at. When we're insanely rich. Not if we ever get insanely rich. When we're insanely rich, I'm going to be buying art because I like it, not because. But these motherfuckers don't even have the taste to pick out art. They like. They just need it to hold. Like, I live in West Hollywood. The amount of apartments or houses here that are empty, that are just sitting as someone's asset, that they're just holding, like It's a fucking $1.8 million piece of art. You know what I mean? Like, and they're. And you're just like, waiting till it costs 2.4 million, then you sell it and take that $600,000 profit and buy another fucking painting or another fucking building. That shit right therein lies the rub. The problem of being fucking super wealthy. Buying art for asset holding. Not buying art because it aesthetically pleases you or it inspires you, or it's from an artist you like.

Lacey Mosley (39:43)

No, just from more money. Greed. Greed for the sake of greed.

John Gabris (39:48)

Yes. Money on top of money. Bags on bags. You don't need that much at all.

Lacey Mosley (39:53)

The gallery accepted valuable paintings such as Rothko's and Goat Leaves from international galleries on consignment. So they're getting. They renting them. They got them on consignment. But when they sold the painting, they would use the proceeds of the sales to buy antiques, pay for car leases and racquet club memberships instead of sending the money to the original gallery galleries. So they're like, hey, let Us rent out your painting. We're gonna get the girls interested in it. They're gonna come, they're gonna see it, they're gonna buy it, and they're like, okay, sure, yeah, yeah, we'll do that. And then. Hello, Al, did our painting sell? Because we saw it at somebody's house on Instagram. Oh, no, that's a lithogram. We still got your painting. Don't worry about.

John Gabris (40:29)

Yeah, don't you worry about that, right?

Lacey Mosley (40:34)

Somebody in the back is like, what are we gonna do with all this cash? Oh, you didn't hear that? That's other cash. We haven't sold yours yet. The Roth coast are moving real slow this week. So call back next week. Oh, grift. By 1984, the gallery had declared bankruptcy. And eventually, in 1986, one of the defrauded owners contacted the Mounties, the Royal Canadian Mountie Police, and the couple was charged with over $300,000 of fraud. Karen fled to Europe with their daughters, and Al was arrested and released on bail. So at least Karen was like, look, I am an Oval teen. All this good chocolate shake is not going in nobody's prison. So you handle that, Al. You got that?

John Gabris (41:12)

I just love. Like, we could have guessed that the sentence at some point about this guy Al was going to be. He was arrested and then released on bail. Like, like. And then, like, of course, he was never. Has there been a more obvious outcome for fucking rich? Fucking tan, bald.

Lacey Mosley (41:28)

He looks too rich to be in jail. You saw that sweater.

John Gabris (41:31)

He doesn't have time.

Lacey Mosley (41:32)

We don't put that sweater behind bars. So the beginning of the serial fraud. While awaiting trial, Albert began a relationship with a highly respected photographer named Lorraine Monk, who at the was raising funds to establish a photography museum. Albert promised that he could help raise the money by acquiring Picassos, Boost Defems and other like artwork to sell it for profit. So he's still doing the same grip. He was like, yeah, girl, don't worry about my prison for this. For this crime. She probably didn't look him up because she was blinded by the sweater. All he would need from her is $100,000. And since his money was stuck in Switzerland, this was the only way that he could help her out. So he's like, I would just fund it myself, but you know, the Swiss bank accounts, you know, he's like, look.

John Gabris (42:14)

I already got the bad bitch. Now all I need is $100,000, right?

Lacey Mosley (42:19)

You saw my last name. It's Overtine. He changes his last name to hers. You know who you dealing with don't play. So he was also facing additional fraud charges for stock certificate that he edited to make it look like a $1 million certificate. Come on. Photoshop, you know, that's a part of the game, especially in the 80s. And then tried to use that as collateral to get a $500,000 loan from an investment. Investment firm. So he came in with a piece of paper. This is back when paperwork. And he was like, look at this. Now I'm gonna let y'all hold it. Y'all give me half a million dollars. Albert was finally sentenced to four years in prison. By 1991, he was out on parole and in Halifax as a Swiss doctor entrepreneur. So he got out of parole, all of a sudden. Now he's not in computer science anymore. He didn't go to Harvard anymore. Now he's in. He's in Halifax, and he's a doctor slash entrepreneur.

John Gabris (43:10)

You know how that's brave? Like, oh, yeah. I do cancer surgeries all the time. Like, in over your head instantly.

Lacey Mosley (43:18)

Herbalife entrepreneur. So he was convicted again that same year and sentenced to three years and then paroled again in 1994. Okay, Al, you really love going to jail. You just, like, set up my old cot. Y'all know where I like to sleep, get my commissary ready. This is a lot of jail. Where's your wife and kids? They're like, oh, dad's in jail. He's away again.

John Gabris (43:39)

Oh, you know, he does jail. That's like a fucking Malibu rehab. Anyway, so it doesn't matter.

Lacey Mosley (43:44)

He's summering in club fed. He'll be back soon. So five months later, he was busted yet again on fraud charges and sentenced to two years. Oh, my goodness. He is not gonna give up. I appreciate the perseverance. When he got out, Al returned to Toronto and began a relationship with a woman named Brigitte. Okay, she's like a zsa zsa gabor look alike. Perfect for Al's flamboyant personality.

John Gabris (44:08)

Oh, hell, yeah.

Lacey Mosley (44:09)

He went and got somebody who looked rich.

John Gabris (44:11)

Finally, things are looking up for Al.

Lacey Mosley (44:13)

He said, I need another woman who looks rich like me so we can do these grifts together. In 1998, Al broke parole when they relocated to Aix en Provence, France, where he posed as a Swiss American tycoon. So he left the doctor part behind. That was a little too hot.

John Gabris (44:29)

And, man, I didn't know tycoon was something you could just say you are.

Lacey Mosley (44:33)

Hey, what's up, John? My name is Lacey. What do you do for a Living?

John Gabris (44:37)

Me? Well, you know, I've been tycooning for a while now.

Lacey Mosley (44:43)

You know, during the week, I tycoon the weekend. I love sailing, you know?

John Gabris (44:50)

Well, right now I'm part time with tycoon, and then, like, I'm looking for more stuff in the industrialist space.

Lacey Mosley (44:58)

I'm just gigging as a tycoon. And then, you know, when I get everything else to get, like, what? That's not a career. So he told his friends of his plans to buy expensive villas and local businesses. That tries right into you, saying, like, people buying property and hoarding it. He also claimed that he was a licensed pilot with his own private plane, a champion tennis player ranked 14 in the world for his age group, and an accomplished academic working on a doctorate in psychology through the University of Zurich. He gave himself a lot of jobs.

John Gabris (45:26)

Well, here's the thing. The world we come from, the comedy world, is just full of people who call you out on shit for fun. And we look for that, and we do it to each other.

Lacey Mosley (45:37)

Even if it's true, we're gonna roast you.

John Gabris (45:40)

Yeah. And the world of rich people is no questions asked. It's just like, okay, yeah, you're a pilot. Okay, World champion tennis player. Why not? We're all stupid rich. And of course you were. I was too f. Like, there's just something about their level of rich where they play by different rules of.

Lacey Mosley (45:57)

Just like, it's all hushed whispers over martinis at the country club.

John Gabris (46:01)

Yeah. It's like, no way. He's a trained pilot. We've never seen him fly. He's never talked about it any other time except to say he's a pilot. It's like, well, who could disagree, honey? Allow the Ovaltine man his pilot license stories, his dalliances.

Lacey Mosley (46:15)

And also, rich dudes love to get into piloting. That's like, their favorite thing. And, like, you don't want to risk not being able to get on the PJ because you doubted him. He said he was a pilot, right?

John Gabris (46:23)

Yeah. You don't want to get not flew out.

Lacey Mosley (46:26)

Exactly. You don't want extended leg room. You want extended seating in a gym in the plane, like you're trying to see what's going on. So while in France, Al acquired several valuable paintings by contacting a New York gallery and saying he needed art to decorate his house. I love how when you're rich, you can just be like, hello, Moma, Bring me some of them arts from my house. What? And they're like, sure, yeah, you're a tycoon, right?

John Gabris (46:53)

You fly to oh yeah, come on in tycoon. And fly me and my wife to go buy you art, please.

Lacey Mosley (46:58)

Love it. He wrote them a post dated check for $4.3 million as he would need time to get the funds released from his trust in Lichtenstein. Now I'm sorry, but post dated checks I thought was something for when you don't have money and you are a regular person. How do you take a post dated $4.3 million check?

John Gabris (47:19)

Well, dude, that's what's crazy too. When you get to these elite level, like the billion dollar scammer is doing the same is doing three card Monty, but just in a slightly different way, you know what I mean? Like the scams. The scams are all rooted in the same principles. Just no matter how high up you get, it's just the amount of zeros that change in these fucking scams.

Lacey Mosley (47:36)

And people assume a lot because if you can finagle your way into rooms where rich people have. Because you know, rich people like what you see on Instagram, what you see on TV about lavish parties and celebrities and stuff. That's the tip of the iceberg when it comes to rich people. Soirees and secret events that they don't tell you about because they don't want you to know how much they're harming you by hoarding the wealth that they stole from you. And so if you can get into those rooms, they're like, oh well, he must deserve to be here. This is our most secret party.

John Gabris (48:02)

Yeah, right. Well that's like. Yeah, there's no way so and so would allow a scammer in our ranks. We're all rich freaks, you know what I mean? Like that party features asterisk. This party features eight scammers. Right.

Lacey Mosley (48:15)

But $4.3 million on Klarn. That's wild.

John Gabris (48:19)

That's. Yeah. Trying to lay away on over 4 mil. Like, oh yeah, here's writing a check. I would have to count the zeros like multiple times to make sure I wasn't accidentally putting out 43 million or 430,000.

Lacey Mosley (48:32)

I'd be like, right, because that's too many zeros for me for my to.

John Gabris (48:35)

Handwrite in a check. It's like what do you put in the memo?

Lacey Mosley (48:38)

Please wait, don't wait for deposit till the 30th. It's the first the pages are going to be to you by then. Yeah, yeah, but don't worry about it. Just mail the paintings. So without any collateral, the gallery said okay and shipped the paintings, which Albert then sold to the auction house Sotheby's for a $700,000 deposit. So he said flipped this art that he did not own. Money in hand, he and Brigitte left France in a cloud of angry local business owners and bounced checks. The gallery he stole from then hired a private detective who tracked the couple through Paris and Florence, where Albert was setting up as an antiques dealer. So he's already onto his next grip with the money he got from his last.

John Gabris (49:22)

He's on his, like, 15th job. He's just giving himself all these rich people jobs one after another.

Lacey Mosley (49:28)

No one works harder in crime than Albert, okay? He's putting in the 10,000 hours.

John Gabris (49:32)

He's hustle. Yeah, he's hustle.

Lacey Mosley (49:35)

So the two were arrested and then released because their paperwork from the French authorities arrived late and sent back to France and rearrested and caught. So they did get extradited and they were rearrested.

John Gabris (49:46)

Different kind of con. Unfortunately.

Lacey Mosley (49:48)

I know a con in con. Okay. Con artiste in con France. This time, Al was driving a Ferrari while posing as a lawyer. Doctor, film producer. Brigitte was acquitted of charges, while Al was convicted of fraud, shipped back to Canada, and jailed for a parole violation. So the women are getting away, and.

John Gabris (50:05)

I love that for them, as they should.

Lacey Mosley (50:09)

Was like, I was just a bad bitch. Karen was like, I just am an oval team. Bad bitch. I don't know what this man has been up to. I thought he was a doctor, lawyer, pilot.

John Gabris (50:16)

I just wanted to make highly nutritious chocolate drink. Like, that's all.

Lacey Mosley (50:20)

That's all I've been doing is helping the kids.

John Gabris (50:22)

I've always wanted to be a tycoon's wife. Okay?

Lacey Mosley (50:26)

So the cycle repeated over and over for the following decade. Cause they just won't lock this man up permanently. They're like, ah, just a little bit. Let him out. He's so fun and looks rich. As Albert was in and out of jail between a slew of enchanted, increasingly creative schemes to infiltrate and scam wealthy circles. Why haven't the wealthy talked about him yet? Nobody knows Albert's coming. Like, he goes to play tennis at the country club. And nobody's like, get this man out of here.

John Gabris (50:47)

Well, that's how. That's how these scammers stay winning, right? Is because, like, rich people don't want a cop to being duped ever. They'll just very embarrassed. Yeah. Oh, I just take the L, the $1.1 million L, and keep your mouth shut. Like, that's what these rich people like. Well, it was a bad investment. I wasn't fooled by anyone because I'm rich. So that means I'm also intelligent by design.

Lacey Mosley (51:08)

Right? I have 4.3 million to throw away. It's fine.

John Gabris (51:11)

Backdate it all you want.

Lacey Mosley (51:13)

That's a vacation to the Caymans. It's fine. Meanwhile, they're at home, like, crying themselves to sleep every night. Wow. So he also self published and held book signings for a book he mostly copied directly from Larry McDonald's outperforming the market, and used to convince other marks that he was a finance expert. I mean, he low key is a finance expert. He separated a lot of people from their money, which arguably is finance.

John Gabris (51:36)

Well, I mean, that shit is like, all our friends, like, all our friends, all our peers who are fucking podcast experts are, like, just getting their info from other podcasts. You know what I mean? Like, we're all experts now. And it's like this guy's just like, yeah, I'm. I've read a book about investing. Let me help you. It's like, yo, I downloaded Robinhood. I got you.

Lacey Mosley (51:54)

That's me on the cod. I'm like, Like, I've read. I've done a lot of comedy about Scott, and now I talk with Whoopi Goldberg as the narrator. And that's like, the biggest bummer is people coming over to the podcast from watching the Con on ABC and realizing how, like, crazy and unhinged I am and how much cursing and yelling and comedy there is. They were like, she was a buttoned up talking head, using words like indubitably. And now we're up here, and I'm like, bh, Let me tell y'all. They're like, what happened? This is not what we signed up for. Signed up for a classy lady educating us.

John Gabris (52:27)

Well, welcome network classy lady scam fans. This is a fucking. You're in the podcast world now, bitch. It's different, baby.

Lacey Mosley (52:36)

In 2009, he met a Toronto woman named Mahalia Zavoyanu.

John Gabris (52:41)

Ooh.

Lacey Mosley (52:42)

The couple met online. Ooh, girl, no. And shortly after, she moved into his mento penthouse and signed over her life savings of $80,000 thousand dollars to Albert. So she meets him online, she goes to his penthouse, is giving rich, and then she's like, why not give you my life savings of $80,000, boo? Because we in love. He promised he was going to buy a house for her elderly parents. But in 2012, he told her she would have to move out for a while as his severely depressed daughter was coming to live with Him. Oh, no.

John Gabris (53:10)

Oh man.

Lacey Mosley (53:11)

Well, I gotta move out.

John Gabris (53:13)

Well, doesn't it get sadder as the scam? Like now it's like an older lady for 80 grand. It was 4.3 million in art earlier. Like it gets a little, little more and more desperate as he goes down.

Lacey Mosley (53:23)

Extremely desperate. He used this woman, got her, separated her from her money and then discarded her so quickly. And you know, online dating for women is already treacherous if you're dating CIS men because it's always a grift. But then to have someone separate you from your money like this and then kick you out of the home with no money left is. That's ruthless. I can't fuck with that. That's so wrong. So the truth was he had just met someone else, a woman named Antoinette. So he had found another woman. So he was like, you about to move out temporarily, forever. And he was like. She was like, al, why you changing the locks? Oh, don't worry about that, baby. Don't worry about that.

John Gabris (53:56)

Nothing to worry about here. Yo, you still got that 11 bucks that you said you were gonna give me?

Lacey Mosley (54:01)

My daughter loves new locks and she loves to put your, all your belongings on the curb. That's what she asked me to do. And you know I love my kids, so sorry about that. So Antoinette was 54 and working as an executive director at a medical clinic when she met Albert, a charming ultra wealthy businessman working on his latest business venture, a Canadian merchant bank called Marwa Holdings. So now he's trying to make a bank.

John Gabris (54:26)

Classic went from making bank to making a bank.

Lacey Mosley (54:30)

A bank. He's like, how can I get more people's money? I store it for them.

John Gabris (54:34)

You're a banker? I'm a bank. Er, er, er, I'm a bank.

Lacey Mosley (54:39)

Er. The couple even attended the Duke of Edinburgh Awards together on an invitation from a law firm Al was close with. So he's still got connection. He's taking her to the award shows, to the fancy rich spaces.

John Gabris (54:51)

So, well, if I'm Al, I'm keeping lawyers around for sure. My man's about to go to jail again, if anything, and his patterns keep true.

Lacey Mosley (54:59)

He's a lawyer's wet dream because it just keeps giving.

John Gabris (55:03)

You know, there's like a 16 year old kid who got caught with like a fucking blunt and has been in jail for like 10 years. Then there's this guy Al, who's been arrested nine times defrauding old people of all their money and just keeps fucking out, stays out there scamming a whole.

Lacey Mosley (55:18)

Life ruiner just out in the streets being a menace to society.

John Gabris (55:22)

Whole life ruiner. I like that expression. We got a whole life ruiner out here in the street.

Lacey Mosley (55:27)

That is his personal mission. You got a life, he coming to ruin it.

John Gabris (55:30)

Okay, hold on to your life.

Lacey Mosley (55:32)

Hold on to your life, girl, because he's coming to ruin it. After only a couple months of dating, the couple moved in together, and Al convinced Antoinette to sell her house and quit her job. He also convinced Antoinette to invest some of her money from the house selling sale with him, as well as some of her retirement savings in his company. About $155,000 in total. Oh, don't give people your money, because why do they need your money if they got money? You have to ask yourself that question. If you're rich, why do you need my money?

John Gabris (55:59)

Well, that's the thing. We get so fooled easily, right? Like, oh, man, I have some money. This guy says he has more. He says he can turn my some money into way more. So you, like, let him try, and then it doesn't work, and you're like, like. And if you let him try, don't.

Lacey Mosley (56:13)

Let him try with all your money.

John Gabris (56:15)

Yes. Leave a little of something in the tank for yourself.

Lacey Mosley (56:18)

Don't do it. So he drew up a contract and said that he would make her director of Marwa, the bank which loaned large sums of money at high market interest rates and claimed to have set up a trust in Antoinette's name, despite having been recently made completely dependent on him. So she gave up all her money, which is power in a relationship. You know, a lot of divorces end because of finances. And now he's like, oh, but I set up a little trust for you. How you gonna set up something with my money? How you gonna be like, here's a little bit of your money for you, boo. What?

John Gabris (56:47)

I got you. I got you. I put some of your money in a savings account. You can't touch it for 10 years, but you're gonna thank me later.

Lacey Mosley (56:53)

You can't look at it either, but know it's there.

John Gabris (56:56)

You're gonna like the way you look. Don't you worry.

Lacey Mosley (56:59)

I guarantee it. So they were married in March of 2013, barely a year after they first met. The ceremony was held in the condo's building's party room. I thought he was rich. Why are y'all doing this in the party room? You renting out the condo's party room for the wedding. That's not giving rich. A dinner was held afterwards with 20 of mostly Antoinette's friends and Family at an expensive French restaurant. So you at the wedding and none of your husband's family shows up. That doesn't ring a bell to you? He's like, oh, they can't get here from Switzerland. They're stuck in customs.

John Gabris (57:27)

Their sweaters are tied around their neck. Got caught on the Emirates flight that they were flying. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, everything should be like, this should be. You should start sniffing this out. You know what I mean? Like, oh, he has no one from his old life at all.

Lacey Mosley (57:41)

So they have this dinner, 20 of mostly Antoinette's friends and family at an expensive French restaurant. And Al leaves early and left the large bill with Antoinette's uncle. Dang. He's skipping out on you dining and dashing at the wedding.

John Gabris (57:54)

Oh, your wedding. Ordering fucking food for every. You know, popping bottles and then being like, I gotta go.

Lacey Mosley (58:01)

It's a celebration. We'll take the steak with the gold on it. Oh, man, y'all, I gotta go to the bathroom. Why did he take his coat and his keys?

John Gabris (58:07)

Yeah, Venmo requests me if you need any cash. I gotta run.

Lacey Mosley (58:11)

I gotta run. So you're skipping out on your honeymoon, y'all, at the Virgin Islands? And he's like, okay, baby, I gotta leave early for business. Oh, wait. But we haven't paid the bill. Bye. As a married couple, almost everything in their shared house was Albert's. He had made Antoinette give away or sell most of her belongings, including her furniture, which didn't meet meet his standards. So he's taking everything away from this woman. She can't even have a chair or a lamp. That's. That's down bad. He wouldn't let you have drapes.

John Gabris (58:39)

Well, that's. That's where it gets desperate. He's like. Now he's, like, pawning off her clothes to, like, trying to sell her clothes on Poshmark and like that, right?

Lacey Mosley (58:46)

She's like my grandmother's brooch on the real real.

John Gabris (58:51)

I went from Roscoe to selling my ottoman. Like, Jesus Christ, Al. Thank. Think some fucking. Al's down bad.

Lacey Mosley (58:57)

He's down real bad and sad. So Al also wanted to know where Antoinette was at all times and with whom, and gave her a GPS enabled cell phone to keep track as well as a monitor of her calls. So now this is, like, abusive, controlling stuff. He's taking everything from this woman. This is terrible.

John Gabris (59:13)

It's fucked up. He needs more info. He needs. He needs more shit to, like, take better advantage of her.

Lacey Mosley (59:18)

Anytime people isolate you from everyone you know and love, anytime they try to take control of your finances and say that run, because it's about to get bad. So because Antoinette had no direct access to her money, she continued to try to work it out. Of course, the end of their marriage began a few months in when Antoinette found bank records belonging to Marwa with the other woman's name on them. So remember his previous girl Mahalia, the one who he kicked out because he said his daughter was depressed? He's still writing her names on these documents. She had signing authority on the company's bank account, and Antoinette was supposed to be the director of it, though she had never heard of this woman. She's like, who is. Who is this woman? Like, why is she on these things? At the same time, she took her engagement ring to a jeweler for resizing and learned that it was costume jewelry.

John Gabris (60:02)

Oh, man, you gotta run an appraisal, sis.

Lacey Mosley (60:05)

He gave you glass?

John Gabris (60:06)

Oh, that's. That's heartbreaking.

Lacey Mosley (60:08)

He gave you cubic zirconiums.

John Gabris (60:10)

Why is that a bridge too far in my book? Like, I don't. Like, he's done so much brutal up shit, and I'm like, oh, no, he.

Lacey Mosley (60:17)

Couldn'T even give a real ring.

John Gabris (60:19)

Like, that's when the scammers get to be fucking real. Depressing is when they're like, legit grimy to a fault. Like, yo, you can't, like, rack up 4 million in scams and then let this woman have a lavish couple of years at least, right?

Lacey Mosley (60:32)

You couldn't have went to Jared like, all of this, and you went to Claire's for her wedding ring. You are disrespectful. So Antoinette confronted Al on both matters, who explained that Mahalia was simply an associate he was helping. His explanation for the ring was that her ring was a fake one used for traveling, and there was a mix up with the actual jeweled ring. Gaslighter like, cuz wouldn't she know if she had a real ring for travel since she's wearing it? So Albert became violent, especially when Antoinette brought up their marriage problems. Antoinette eventually went to the police, which was Al's final undoing. Finally.

John Gabris (61:05)

Oh, yeah, Al. Al. Al's having some issues with the cops over the course of a fucking jumping countries. Yeah, Interview. Poll's got his fucking photo on lock, literally.

Lacey Mosley (61:17)

He goes to the precincts now. He doesn't even have to fingerprint in or take a photo. They're like, we got one on five. Just bring him to booking. Just bring him to central. We know who he is. So because of Antoinette's help and the gathering of the documentation. Authorities charged Albert with domestic assault and eight counts of fraud totaling $1.2 million. He pleaded guilty and was sentenced to only five years in prison.

John Gabris (61:39)

Oh, and how many this fucking bitch do? That's the thing, too.

Lacey Mosley (61:43)

Exactly. He had left Antoinette tens of thousands of dollars in debt on top of owing $30,000 in back rent as he put her name on the lease of the apartment.

John Gabris (61:52)

Oh, what low stakes scammery? What low stakes fuckery? That's bullshit.

Lacey Mosley (61:57)

Well, he was getting older. This is him retiring. He's like, I'm just doing small grifts now. I don't got time to do $4 million art fraud. Now I'm just scamming a nice woman who loved me. He also maxed out her line of credit, leaving Antoinette so little that she had to move in with her daughter today. Albert maintains that it was all a misunderstanding. Sure.

John Gabris (62:16)

Oh, yeah. How many of these were missing? Also, we're looking at a picture of Al in jail right now, and I'm being reminded that in Europe and Canada, jail is different.

Lacey Mosley (62:27)

Yeah, there's like, picnic benches out there.

John Gabris (62:29)

Yeah. He's not outdoors. Yeah. He's not in the American carceral system for five years. He's in the fuck, you know, he's elsewhere. This motherfucker cannot be touched.

Lacey Mosley (62:38)

And financial crime is not as bad at all, Nowhere near violent crime. And so I don't agree with, like, locking people up and throwing away the key for financial crime, but a situation like this where y'all can pull out his, like, CVS receipt of people who.

John Gabris (62:50)

Like the wake of people's lives ruined in the past, it's like, this motherfucker needs to do a little.

Lacey Mosley (62:55)

He needs to stay in the jail, because when he comes out, he's gonna do the same thing. We already know he's proven it time and time and time and time again. So this is the type of person who needs to stay under the prison. Don't let him out. Lock him up. For real? For real. And I don't even fuck with the prison system. But he's somebody who needs to be put away. If he comes out, he should be able to own a credit card. That should be a violation of parole if you just see him with a piece of plastic, swiping it somewhere. No cash only. His parole officer has to check in at his job, check his receipts, check everything.

John Gabris (63:27)

Like, no, how about this? Rothko as my bail. No, no, no. We fall for this.

Lacey Mosley (63:33)

It's got gold bricks in it, though. You just gotta get it out of customs in Indiana. No, no, no.

John Gabris (63:38)

Oh, the gold bricks.

Lacey Mosley (63:39)

So he says it was a misunderstanding and he intended to pay his investors back eventually. Sometime in the future, he plans to continue rebuilding his life beyond fraud, in part suing Antoinette for the things that she took from their apartment. How you gonna sue me?

John Gabris (63:56)

He's suing her?

Lacey Mosley (63:57)

Yes. According to him, that was $50,000 in monogram silverware. $10,000, like a value of a wallet. A $10,000 wallet and $7,000 in a coffee cream set. What?

John Gabris (64:12)

What the fuck?

Lacey Mosley (64:13)

This man is so petty and so small and awful, and I'm so sad that he gets to try to rebuild his life again. Y'all, if you see out on the dating apps, please do not swipe right. Right?

John Gabris (64:24)

Yeah. Do not share your fucking PayPal password with this guy.

Lacey Mosley (64:29)

Don't share anything. Don't tell him your name.

John Gabris (64:31)

Stay away.

Lacey Mosley (64:33)

This is the kind of man who lies about everything. You be like, oh, is it cold out? He be like, no, it feels great. You go out, it's a blizzard. Like, he's just lying for the sake of lying like evil. Well, that brings us to the saddest part of the show. The end where I have to let John go.

John Gabris (64:48)

But before we do.

Lacey Mosley (64:49)

I know, but before we do, Scammer of the week. This is where we highlighted charlatan who's worthy of our praise. Or maybe not. Let's see. So a 22 year old new Jersey man. I love this. On the east Coast, a New Jersey man is on the hook after committing unemployment fraud and bragging about it. Okay, I was with you until the bragging.

John Gabris (65:07)

Yeah. Stay low.

Lacey Mosley (65:09)

Willie Carter of Belmar was arrested stealing at least $400,000 in unemployment benefits and then posting about it on Instagram.

John Gabris (65:17)

Now why are you trump Rookie scam.

Lacey Mosley (65:21)

Clout is such a drug. Why do you need people to know that you are stealing on Instagram? Don't you know there's going to be people in your comments congratulating you and also people hating on you who are like, hello 911.

John Gabris (65:31)

Yeah, just do what everyone else did and be like, yo, stay on your grind like me and you can have $400,000 and just no explanation as to how you, a 22 year old in New Jersey, got a 400 grand. Just shut your fucking mouth. Don't let anyone eyes. Hey, I found a. I found a loophole in this slot machine. You know, it's like, just keep your mouth shut and keep your bed and.

Lacey Mosley (65:51)

You could have become famous on Instagram with a grind culture scam. Like, I never sleep. I sleep when I'm dead. That's how I got more money than y'all. That's how I got $400,000. I have several businesses, all legit. You could have started a financial, like, info seminar. You know, get people to pay to hop on Zoom, where you tell them not.

John Gabris (66:10)

Yeah, you can be a financial influencer and be like, this is how I made 400 grand in no time. And just never really give any information of importance.

Lacey Mosley (66:17)

And they'll never just like, how we went to Harvard. You just be like, you know, you gotta buy, you gotta sell.

John Gabris (66:22)

It's about Harvard for sure. Over here, crypto.

Lacey Mosley (66:26)

You could just say anything. Why would you do this? So Willie applied online for unemployment at least 34 times in 10 states between June 2020 and November 2020, using various names. You know, in 2020, all the government systems were down bad. They were like, here's money. And now they're going after not the rich people who stole the PPPs, but the regular people. They're like, where's your farm? So will he apply for benefits in New Jersey, Texas, Colorado, and California, among other places? He really spread it around and then transferred the funds to two bank accounts in his name. Investors caught on, and when they tracked the IP address of the applications, they found his Instagram page containing photos of stacks of cash, as well as pictures and messages about unemployment.

John Gabris (67:09)

What a numbness.

Lacey Mosley (67:11)

Y'all are making the police job way too easy.

John Gabris (67:15)

Yeah, don't be like, don't post fucking evidence.

Lacey Mosley (67:19)

Stop filming crime. You putting yourself in 4K. That's embarrassing.

John Gabris (67:23)

No dice. No, not cool. Not a bright move, man. Oh, also, scamming unemployment, like, scamming corporations feels good. Scamming the government feels good. Scamming unemployment just feels.

Lacey Mosley (67:35)

I mean, that is the government. They take our money. And if you never become unemployed, guess what? You never see it. And they love to. I've had unemployment, rightfully so. And something that they like to do is, like, they'll pay you out, and it's accurate. And then when they see that you filing tax returns again, are they like, oh, she got money now. Let's say we paid her too much.

John Gabris (67:52)

Yeah.

Lacey Mosley (67:53)

And then they try to get it back.

John Gabris (67:54)

Oh, shit. You're telling me that shit happened to me when I was, like, 25?

Lacey Mosley (67:58)

Yeah, same. I was around that age. And, like, they were like, oh, hey, now we see you employed again. So we paid you a little too much. How did you pay me a little too much?

John Gabris (68:04)

Much you weren't paying me that 344 a week. I remember the number because I was trying to make it work. Trying to stay alive on $340 a week.

Lacey Mosley (68:11)

Exactly. They want to act like they gave you a stack of a week, like, or more, please. It's such a grift all the way around. So I'm like, I'm not mad at him for scamming, you know, unemployment, but just don't talk about it.

John Gabris (68:24)

No, keep your mouth shut, man.

Lacey Mosley (68:26)

He was so excited. He got away with that grift. He had to tell somebody. Why don't you just date somebody, do a little pillow talk? Why? Why do you have to put it on Instagram where they can find you?

John Gabris (68:35)

Yeah, tell one person and keep that person paid and quiet.

Lacey Mosley (68:39)

Also, 400k is not enough to live a long life on. So if this is your only grift, like, keep it going or.

John Gabris (68:45)

Yeah, keep your mouth shut. Don't shut the money. Hose off yet.

Lacey Mosley (68:48)

A shame. A shame.

John Gabris (68:50)

Absolute shame.

Lacey Mosley (68:51)

Willie, I'm embarrassed for you. This is embarrassing. And you should.

John Gabris (68:53)

Sorry, Willie. Get lost, bro.

Lacey Mosley (68:55)

That was not about the theft.

John Gabris (68:56)

You could have in 800,000 at this point if you just played it cool.

Lacey Mosley (69:00)

And then would be the wiser and we wouldn't be bothered. Wouldn't affect us a bit, no doubt. But that brings us to the end of the show. We have to let John Gabris go. So Jon Favos asked, where would you like to be found? Any socials? Obviously your true tv. The greatest scam on television, which is not a scam. Watching it is hilarious and so entertaining.

John Gabris (69:19)

Yeah, go off, find me there. Find 101 places to party before you die on HBO. Max, find me Abris on Twitter for now and Instagram. And then find me at Actionboys Biz for my Patreon podcast where I talk about action movies for way longer than I should be.

Lacey Mosley (69:34)

And it's so good. And also Patreon guys, give us your money. The Patreon I have with Priscilla. If you want to learn about Internet, get on Patreon. Start subscribing to these. They're popping. And as always, you can find me at D I V A L A C I D Valacy on all platforms. If you want to snitch on your friends or family and your enemies. Scam got his pocket Congregation. Stay scheming, but don't post about it.

John Gabris (69:56)

Stay scheming and stay keeping your mouth shut.

Lacey Mosley (69:59)

Amen. Scam goddess. This has been an Earwolf production in association with Team Coco. Scam Goddess stars and is hosted by me, Lacey Mosley, AKA Scam Goddess. It's produced by Judith Garcbo, engineered by Ryan Connor and Abby Aguilar. Our. Our researcher is Kaylyn Brand. Stay scheming.